#OMGGG IM USING THIS TO RANT

[geoxstxrs]

Hey pookie

*does a backflip*

heyy fruitss <333 I love you pookie !!! /p

*does a frontflip*

[theespeakerboxxx]

OMGGG lily just got to the part in her rant video where she called herself an indigenous woman, my eye twitched so bad...

how did she spin the block on her bullying the shit out of her coworkers to guilt tripping her viewers by saying she got colonized and is disconnected from her culture?

stop using your raceplay fetish as a shield for when people call you out rightfully on your shit...youre a damn white lady pick yourself up and have some respect for the actual indigenous people that actually struggle

also her saying "i wouldnt call myself racist but"- is some insane work HAHA. that should never be followed up with a "but"

and also her saying "im making my space friendly for people of color" ...nahhhh im good you can keep it the way it is, i dont want anymore of my people being associated with you jerking it to black and brown torture porn. also poc is such an idiotic term but i wont get into that here

btw lily, please stop sending self asks about a "black woman" praising you for writing a black female character. you're a racist, a liar, and you associate yourself with sneakytaffer, who says nigger off the cuff and your brother...your brother...

[textmel8r]

thank god i see someone addressing the overall vomit inducing shit the jjk fans churn out to jack off to. it's concerning and shocking to see so many people defend that like?! their logic is that it's fiction or that they only like it in fiction but i have never seen a guy who says that he's into tomboys say that he's only into fictional tomboys let's bffr it's because it's legal and acceptable to like tomboys and not the same case for wanting to bang your sibling... sorry for the rant i'm tired seeing people romanticizing rape and incest in this fandom. i thought people would be better than this or know better but obviously not. you will be blessed with good fortune for the rest of your days, your land fertile, your crops healthy, harvest plentiful, your riches increase by the minute.

omggg right back at uuuu 😍

these kinds of topics are also prevalent in most of those shitty, popular books on tiktok apparently?? idk i don’t fw non-fanfic books (yes i know im a dumb anime pilled zoomer haha ha laugh it up) but why is there such a market in the literary world for rape stories? and not even like, rape used as a backstory device (which i think is okay if done real and clinically, not romantically) ,, no it’s these lame ass, copy and paste self inserts where gooner 40 year old women put themselves in the place of the main female character who gets raped and abused by the hot yandere bad boy. WHY DO WE WANT THIS?? why has this of all things become such a prevalent fantasy??

and don’t even get me started on the bullshit trope where the rape victim gets wet mid-assault, so she must secretly like it… ok let me stop before i blow a blood vessel

[divinequo]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I WATCHED THE SEASON 2 EPISODE 6 TRAILER AND IM SO FUCKING PSYCHED I HAVE YO RANT ONG OMG OMG OMG OMG IT LOOS INCREDIBLE

⁉️⁉️‼️‼️‼️WARNING THIS HAS SPOILERS PLUS SCREENSHOTS FROM THE TRAILER SO LIKE UH SCROLL AND GO AWAY IF YOU WANNA REMAIN UNSPOILED YES YES MM MM YES⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️

OK FIRST OFF HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

I GOTTA RANT ABOUT THIS FIRST SINCE IT'LL PROBABLY TAKE THE LONGEST BUT WE HAVE BEEN THEORIZING ABOUT THIS GUY FOR YEARS.

YEAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRSSSSS!!! AND NOW ITS BEEN CONFIRMED HE'S SOME SORT OF ANTAGONIST IT LOOKS LIKE? WHICH HOLY SHIT OMG IM SO SIKED I LOVE HIM ALREADY HES THE BEST VILLAIN EVER ONG (I know the episode isn't even out yet let alone a English version but let me be delusional I'm happy and excited) but anyway AAAAAH HE LOOKS SO ORDINARY YET SO MENACING???!? from blending in with the background characters in episodes and appearing to be spying on Dee in his qna, as well as his wanted posters, we will FINALLY GET SOME SORT OF INFORMATION AND CHARACTER INTRODUCTION!!! (May I add he strikes a strange resemblance to Gustav? No? Just my opinion? Ok) OMG AND I JUST REALIZED HIM FLIPPING THE KEYS?? WAIT WAIT HEAVY SAID TO VICTORIA IN SEASON ONE HIW HE LOST HIS KEYS AGAIN, AND THATS ABSOLUTELY THEIR HOUSE KEYS YOU CANT CONVINCE ME OTHER WISE, IT LITERALLY COMES FULL CIRCLE, NOT MENTION LIKE, BRO WHY DOES HE WANT THEM TO NOT GO HOME? DOES HE WANT THEM AWAY FROM THEIR PARENTS? IS HE FORCING THEM TO TALK TO HIM? OR DID THEY FIND HIM AND NOW HES MONOLUAGING???? OMFG IDK, ONE THINGS FOR SURE IS HE IS DOING SOMETHING NEFARIOUS TO THIS ABANDONED AMUSEMENT PARK, TBATS WHY HES ON THE WANTED POSTERS INNLIFS INTRODUCTIONNEPISODE HOLYYY FUUUUCKKKKK GUYS I LOVE HIM, HES MY NEW FAVORITE VILLAIN, I really hope this doesn't age like milk me saying I love his little character *sweats nervously*

And can we just TALK and take a moment to ADMIRE the artwork of the backgrounds and main surrounding pieces?? LOOK AT THIS!!

And yk the metal families profile picture on YouTube? Yk... The clunky old sign no one cares about?

FUCKING LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK

IT WAS PLANNED ALL ALONG GGGG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMGGGGEXDCRFVFY UGC YFDXYREXYRDXTDDXTD STD FDFH THEIR PROFILE PICTURE IS LITERALLY, GENUINELY FROM THIS EPISODE, it is NOT coincidental, THIS MADE ME LOVE IT ALL THE MORE!! it feels so special now knowing this knowledge and though this part isn't THAT important i still had to mention the shock I got from seeing it in the trailer :))

Last thing I wanted to mention is these two lovely little gumdrops!!!!!!!

ommmgggg THE SHIPPING BAIT ABOUT TO HIT HAAARRRDDD i paused on like a smear frame, basically their hiding from the security guard because it's night time and they snuck in!! Omggg do you guys even realize what this MEANS????!!!!?!?!?! this means we'll also get maybe a few scenes if our and Dee together ALONE, idk what is up with my brain but I never really shipped them that much or cared to ship for them until seeing THIS, maybe I'm just really pathetic in my own love life but the way lif is holding onto Dee (for protection and to hide yk) is SENDING me, it is cute, so special and precious, and I need them to start dating, I am officially their number one shipper now (omfg if they become canon in this I will cry myself to sleep istg I'll be so happy knowing I can rest over these cartoon lovers getting together XP)

Oh oh and what do y'all think heavy could be doing while we get some life and Dee scenes? Or while this scene specifically is happening?? My guess is they caught sight of the "glasses kid" and heavy volunteered to go follow after him in suspicion, omg I can't even fathom getting so much new heavy screen time, he's only my all time favorite character, aaaaAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

That's pretty much it, I give my upmost respect and admiration to DiMA, Alina, and every single voice actor, artist, animator, inspirations, etc of this entire show, they all deserve the world and a medal for giving us this spectacular series, that upon now seeing this trailer has made my metal family hyperfixation AWOKE deeply and fiercely

I couldn't find a truly perfect reaction image to seeing this new metal family trailer, so here's this one I drew, have a lovely day/night everyone♡

[pprodsuga]

omggg a snippet just for meeee i'm so honoured u wanted to share something with lil 'ol me. stop it before i develop a parasocial relationship with you...

on a different note, if u will allow me to rant for one wee second.. this is completely irrelevant to anything but i was looking for some romcom novels to read (bc i need to stop letting fanfiction consume me), and tell me why authors pick the ugliest most generic ytest names. i haven't read a real book in a while and i'm so used to reading ff now where even side characters have korean names that the switch over back to western books is awful. i had to stop my search bc wtf is GARRETT and TUCKER. ik a korean name is just a name, there's nothing objectively special, but it's just more unique in the sense that i don't see it often outside of media. the only way to get around this is fantasy books where the names aren't even real names (thank god the book im currently reading is fantasy). PLEASE can i just get an ethnic name and maybe more ethnic characters or something... sob. i just want a college romcom to cope so i can get away from college au's😭 yeah it's fucked for me. thank u for listening to my unsolicited bitch sesh

-comet

just for you, for always being so thoughtful in your words. more under the cut to spare the dash.

your first messages back in june struck a chord within me for two reasons: talking about my writing was an incredibly kind thing for you to do and it validated the hell out of my work. but also, i was experiencing a lot of friendship turmoil that i had to navigate (re: why i wrote never to keep).

i don’t know if i’ve ever expressed just how grateful i am to have read your messages at that time because for that entire month, i felt like i did not have anyone in my life to back me up when i stood up for myself. knowing that you thought i must be someone with a great deal of empathy and kindness restored a bit of faith in me and who i am as a friend. i reread your message over and over again until i could remind myself that i am who i am for a reason. so thank you.

character names are something i think about a lot, both in fanfics and regular fiction. i’m oftentimes taken out of the story when it feels so incredibly yt (but go figure, i’m not white but have a “white” name so i understand that there is some nuance sprinkled in there). but sometimes we just crave that subtle representation in an ethnic name so i don’t have to wait for the author to explain that they’re not….white. in every sense of the word. but like if you’re gonna pick a white name then at least make them sound HOT?

onto the snippet! i’m excited to post this one. no idea when i’ll finish writing/editing but i’m excited that you’re excited. not providing context bc im a menace and will make you wait. 😎 (thank you for being excited.)

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Sunghoon turns to look at you. “You were always the most unpredictable part of my day.” 

“Me?” 

“Yeah. You moved into the apartment next to mine and running into you a few times a week kept me on my toes. I don’t know. I guess I saw you as someone I would have potentially befriended. I could at least pretend I was coming home to talk to someone who cared.” 

“That’s…very sweet. You’re a nice person, Sunghoon.” 

He sighs. “I don’t feel that way. I don’t know when I’m gonna see my family and friends again and explain all of this, but I'm starting to get the feeling that they’ll never hear from me and they’ll never know what happened tonight.” 

“You know,” you begin, “a lot of my life was spent moving from place to place and never having anything or anyone to call home. I can’t imagine what it must feel like for you to leave everything behind. For that, I truly am sorry.”

“It’s really not your fault,” Sunghoon says dryly. “Whoever tried to kill you should get a bullet to his head.” He hears you laugh awkwardly.

“Yeah, well that likely wouldn’t solve our problems.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I don’t think that man acted on his own accord. It’s too professional to assume he’s working alone.” 

“You’re saying he’s working with someone else?” 

“Or, he’s working for someone.” 

Sunghoon gulps. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

“The price of freedom is high. Remember that.” 

“You know, none of this explains how you know what you’re doing. If you know, for that matter.” 

He doesn’t hear you move for a short while and closes his eyes shut. Once again, he’s found himself slipping up and saying things that don't translate well. Too afraid to speak, Sunghoon considers sleeping and dealing with his actions in the morning. 

“I know what I’m doing because I’ve done it before,” you say through the darkness. “When your whole life revolves around survival, you adapt to the best of your ability and do anything to stay alive. I’ve learned a few things from my time on the run so please know that I know what I’m doing.”

“Who are you?” 

The room is silent. 

“Someone you can trust.” 

[imaginary-dx]

Just finished the first two chapters of terror fest and omggg. IM SO HEATEDDD. Spoilers below

Okay so personally to me the character customization for the men sucksss, but i do love the brown mc’s face(used it for the deadliest game)

I think the premise is super interesting and i like that our character is a descendant of the og killer. And is it just me or is kinda like showing with how aggressive our character is( Very threatening towards destiny which totally understandable imo)

Anyway on the topic of destiny OHHH i’m so heated. As of now i despise her, like fuck man poor MC. Her little rant on how she was selfish but is not that person anymore seems like such bullshit. The reason for the party and just how little she respects the MC RAHH. Plus that little scene with the MC being left out of the hug made me so sad.

For the LI’s, all of them are saur sexy. Though i personally don’t like them for now(The hug scene plus how they trying to make the MC be more forgiving towards Destiny and them not really believing us despite the fact MC was stabbed in the arm(depending on ur choices)) As for Allen or Alana, they kinda creeped me out tbh and their death had no impact(especially the lack of the MC’s reaction towards them literally being killed in front of them)Also i hope we can be poly cause omgggg all the LI’s are sooo fine anyway anyway

i’m excited for the rest and i hope our MC can continue being a baddie and stick up for themselves.

Sorry for the long rant or wtv i’m just super interested in the story but yall lmk what yall think.

[calvatier]

ranting

is the world crashing around me and I shld choke and die or are the hormones acting up and:oh omggg my period..!!!!

But, I genuinely hate how my emotions are genuinely out of control sometimes just because IM BORN THIS WAY??

Days where everything agitates me or makes me incredibly down when ik I'm not that type of person because on usual days, I feel like the sun is on my skin and that nothing in the world can ever go wrong ,,,BUT OH MY GOD IM SO SICK of my hormones just turning everything a 180°

But the worst part of everything is that I'm never mad or sad because of anyone, I'm genuinely just angry at myself for feeling angry because I know I shouldnt,,,,I know what kind of person I can be and ik I always try to seem optimistic but sometimws i deel like i canr control the negative emotions

I wish I could reason with myself but it's so hard to see reality when it's such a strong feeling

I rly can't do anything but just use my usual comfort methods,,,like writing,,,or playing Sims,,,or watching my fav shows,,,or drawiinggg

The more I write this,,,the more I realise that I may have projected my issues onto Amias cus wait,,,it sounds so familiar

[fluffallamaful]

HI AGAIN IM BACK!!!!!

I have a couple more lee!George hcs!!

Man's is definitely a grabber when he gets wrecked. If his hands aren't pinned, he's gonna try to grab the lers hands or just something he can hold onto for dear life while he's cackling his little heart out

He'll fight it to the grave that he loves cheer up tickles. Like anytime he's sad about something, dream or sap just come find him and give him gentle little cheer up tickles. (He'll stay as still as he can let them tickle him but he'll fight it to the grave that he likes it lol)

Is the absolute worst ler ever. /lh

He can't even say the word 'tickle' without turning into a tomato and plus if the ler just gives him a couple pokes, he's down and laughing so he doesn't get the chance to tickle others often.

He genuinely hates being tickled in public unless it's like a couple pokes. He always says it's embarrassing when a group of people just look over at him as he's laughing.

◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇

There's this little blurb I can't get out of my head so here you go:

"George!!! You can't just steal all of my charger cords and get away with it!" "I litterally didn't even do that, I'm colorblind. Dream stole them sap, im telling you." "No he didn't, cuz hes always asking me for my charger cords, and he still doesn't have any, so I know it's you!" George's face started to heat up as sapnap came closer to him, wiggling his fingers at George. "S-sapnap, wait! W-we can talk about this!!" "We can't talk about it, but you'll have a lot of laughs over it!" And with that sapnap dove at George.

(Lmk if you like them, also lmk if I wrote George somewhat correctly, I hardly watch George so I don't really know how to write him lol)

Have a good day/night!!!!

welcome baccckxkkjkjjk eeeeeeeee!!!!

(discussion below!!)

🦙🦙🦙…

ok yes absolutely agree with you about george being a grabber i love that so much 🥺 like he just doesn’t know what to do with his hands otherwiseeeee. his hands are so expressive i’ll cry 😭 and yes the cheer up tickles we talked about before but yes i like the idea that he will absolutely deny his enjoyment and the fact that it’s working for sureee. he can’t be just giving that satisfaction away

i DONT however agree that he’s not a good ler omggggg??? omggg i could rant for hours about ler gogy omg. like the little voices he does are so cute?? and i feel like he’d be able to say the most cringy/flustery teases without shame if he’s in a crazy enough mood. i also just think his competitive side would shine like he’d just be so keen to let the lee know that he is absolutely destroying them right now and they can’t even do a thing. he’s just such an underrated lerrrrrr like he’d just be able to embarrass the heck out of a lee and i feel dream and sap would just absolutely cave when matches against his crazy energy. i feel very strongly about ler gogy supremacy as you can see 😂 also lee gogy supremacy. just gogy supremacy in general

AND AHHH a little fic?? gogy the charger stealer. i’m sure it’s happened in their household already. it’s cute that you’ve got george already recognising sap’s tease as though they’ve used it on him before :(( he’s just such a little menace and i love the idea of his button pressing coming back to bite him

🦙🦙🦙…

[fairybinie]

VALLL HI i thought it was finally the time for me to rant a bit about copyccino and what i thought about it. i didn't tell u before a few weeks ago or so when we had our random midnight call but i truly have been following copyccino since the start. i literally have not missed a single chapter, which is very very rare because i normally NEVER read ongoing smaus as i don't like to wait. so the fact i waited for every update patiently and with excitement really shows how much i love(d) it!! i also used to almost only read enhypen smaus and so me reading ur soobin smau and following it and asking to be part of the taglist since the beginning is very weird to me because what????? im actually reading a txt smau! and an ongoing one too!! OMGGG that's crazy frr.. but yeah! im just very happy that i was able to follow it and read it because it's genuinely, and i say this with heart eyes, one of the best smaus I've ever read. and I've read A LOT. ive always liked your works but that smau really made you one of my fav writers on this app! it's definitely in my top five smaus and my number 1 txt smau 🫡🫡🫡 i enjoyed it so so much and im just so happy that you decided to write it and that you were able to finish it, im proud of you and am excited for your future works HIHIIII 🫶🫶🫶🫶🙈🙈

DORI BAE you have no idea how much you just made me cry. i read this and had to take a minute bc my tears were just falling and they’ve just dried i’ll send you a pic 🤩 but omg yes our midnight call that was fun but yeah i do remember you saying you never read txt smaus and copyccino was your exception and i was very </3 i can almost relate bc i don’t read any non txt fics but sometimes you just find something good and it doesn’t matter who it’s for anymore??? and thank you for being patient i know i’ve had my moments without updating i hope i didn’t keep you on your feet for too long 😭 UGH THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS you’ve really touched my heart and you made all these 7 months worth it bc now i know there’s people who enjoyed it just as much as you did and that means a lot 😭😭 ILYYYUU my future works you already know about so just you wait to see them come alive 🙈🙈

[daryascurse]

i loveee the way you write smut and your commandments series is just 😍😍😍 i know its just 3/10 characters and not even done but im already a fan and lovee these types of concepts omggg which other characters do u have planned for the series??? i went crazy for the mei mei one LMAO 💀💀💀😭

🥹 Thank you thank you so much!! I really can't say how happy it makes me to get a message like this. Numbers don't matter; but, I've been feeling a little discouraged because I haven't been getting much feedback via AO3 metrics (kudos, bookmarks, comments, etc.). Again, it totally doesn't matter. But I used to have two separate accounts, one that was actually kinda popular, one of which has some orphaned works from this series before it was a full fleshed series, and the same works I'm reposting now from both accounts (and new works!) don't seem to be getting the same attention as they used to, which kind of makes me doubt if I should have even come back to fic writing. Sorry for a little rant of self-indulged self-pity... thank you so so so much ♡

I love concept works myself so this has been a lot of fun to plan and write! So, there are two more pieces on AO3 that are orphaned that should be put together:

6: Thou Shalt Not Murder- aged-up Megumi

5: Remember the Sabbath and Keep it Holy - Nanami

As for the rest of them... Honor Thy Father I'm pretty set as Toji because yes, it's an easy option but so is he but it doesn't seem like a bad one to pass up. Thou Shalt Not Worship False Idols, I think it would be fun to do Naoya. Thou Shalt Not Take His Name in Vain, probably aging up Yuji because I think it would be fun to throw in Sukuna cameo references. And last, Thou Shalt Have No Other Gods Before Me, I have an idea that is a little ambitious and I'm not sure if I can do it convincingly, so I will bite my tongue on any promises there.

I have to say too that Mei Mei's was the most fun and the most clear to write (so far) in terms of carrying the metaphor, so thank you for the praise!! I wish I could include more characters but I think who've I've chosen is the best fit as far as I could write them. I'd like to play with the idea of doing a Commandment II follow-up sister series where the same concepts are repeated but, maybe multifandom, or another fandom, but that is also something I'm not sure about yet.

[preatoreyna]

(you don’t have to answer this! just an anon dropping in abt the one post w creepy ex) wtf what a creep? fingers crossed that once you move you don’t ever have to deal w that again

omg i hope!! what’s creepier is like the 2nd account he mad he never even posted anything to it or followed anyone on it it was Literally just so he could talk to me 😒 it’s almost been 3 years get a life!

[deaddrip]

It’s an amazing feeling being able to actually draw characters in your own style from shows you’ve watched as a kid ik im technically, yes i am still a kid but shh

[usermaha]

omggg hi! 25 21 update pleaseee! fav characters, fav scenes and so on. rant your head off, please and thank you

finally someone asked me to talk about this show (i wouldve still talked about it but still thanks) im halfway thru Episode 5 btw.

Characters:

Na Heedo: remember how i said i want to protect her after reading your synopsis? the adoption papers are under process right now. she feels like a younger sister, so full of life, so full of hope, full of joy and bravery. she is so simple in her view in life, she has barely any forethought. she no has filter in her expression, and that makes her such a genuine and caring person. Her smiles the widest smile ive ever seen (im obsessed with her smile btw), then in the next scene her eyes are teary. she screams, she whines, she even throws her body around. bc she lives her life dramatically. and given the nature of the show i know she’ll grow up and time will take these things away from her. and i want to protect her from all of that. the faith that she has in herself. when no one believes that she has it in her, when she has no achievements to show for herself. She decides fencing is her destiny, she decides she’ll reach the top, and she makes it happen. For her, liking fencing, the excitement it makes her feel, is reason enough to stand against all the disbelief. I wish i had that too.

Baek Yijin: i intially thought he is the love interest former rich kid and i couldnt care less about him. Guess who was bawling her eyes out in Ep 2? I quickly realized that he is the one dealing with the actual adult repercussions of the IMF crisis. He used to be fun and popular, he had good grades, he wanted to go to NASA. but overnight he lost his dream, and most importantly, his family. watching him face humiliation after humiliation, worry over his brother, yearn for contact with his father, broke my heart. its easy to forget, he is just 22, too young to stand on his feet and face the creditors hounding at his door. He had his whole life ahead of him, and now all the good things in his life are gone. I remember the look in his face in the school flashback. I want that back for him. I want his happiness back.

Ko Yurim: i think the writers are showing her from a distant POV right now and will go in-depth with her character later. but yes i do have some resentment for her. I am genuinely confused as to why she cant stand Heedo. If its simply because she is worried that she’ll overtake her, im sorry but that’s not a good look. I understand the pressure she feels to follow up her gold medal, but unfortunately as of right now that doesnt balance it out for me.

Heedo’s Mom: i know she means well. but her view at her daughter is incomplete, she doesnt even know who she is, what she wants. and the parts she does see are always the ones she interprets negatively. she doesnt believe in her, and that ‘rejection’, you might say, hurts her deeply. That hits too close to home. Usually all that a kid want from parents is their support. They want them to accept them, for their achievements and their mistakes. And not getting that can haunt children forever. “That’s who you are to me. You’re someone i dont want to talk to” 💔

Coach Yang: she is so funny, and the accent, i keep trying to copy it lol. i initially thought that she’d be the tough love kind of coach, but i was surprised that from time to time she praised Heedo and made her aware of her little achievements and her strengths, and also valuable insight on the specific things she needs to work on. Like Heedo mentions in her monolouge, other than Yijin, she is the only one who has shown trust in her.

There hasnt been too much on Jiwoong and Seungwan’s characters yet so 🤷🏻‍♀️.

Jiwoong is a damn smooth flirter. he doesnt come off pushy, and his compliments feel genuine. Yurim seems to respond, the coast is clear given that she actually moves on from Yijin lol.

And Seungwan im really intrigued by bc she’s the top student and i immediately empathize lol. and another reason why i wanted to watch the show was that i saw a gifset of a scene between her and her mom. and i really need to get to the context of the scene.

So this was supposed to have a General Thoughts segment but this is already way too long so ill make the second post on my blog please check it out over there!!!

[mewisloud]

rant sorry

i have a good friend of mine who has what i would call a relatively extensive history of faking mental illnesses?? but then being kind of a dick to me when i actually show symptoms of mine

they very likely fake tics, (i hung out with them a couple days ago and they did not tic at all the entire time until it was brought into conversation and they started ticcing like nonstop, and when the conversation shifted they stopped for the rest of the time i was there. i do not have tics so i cannot be sure of anything, but that just seems really suspicious to me especially considering the other stuff they’ve faked.)

after a lot of pressure from my therapist (who told me i should probably have someone to kind of check up on me if she wasn’t available in the future) i told them about being psychotic! and their instant reply was ‘oh me too lol’ which should have been a warning to me because i am what they call a teenager and psychosis is very very not common in folks my age!! but i did not listen to this and was mostly excited to have a friend who had the same experiences. anddd then when i had a panic attack and locked myself in my bathroom for like the entire day because i was convinced if i came out that i would be killed by the people who watch me, they told me i was crazy and making things up for attention. they also like to make fun of me for my disorganized speech (which is an actual symptom of my actual y’know mental disorder??) sometimes i have trouble saying things correctly because my thoughts are disorganized so my speech is often stumbly or nonsensical and i literally cannot control that!! but they never fail to tease me ever single fucking time i say the wrong word or a sentence that doesn’t make sense or stumble over a word or literally anything

other stuff too, using language and terms that make me uncomfortable even though ive asked them to stop very politely multiple times!! they refuse to use the word ‘delusional’ correctly. jfc. they do anything and mess up or they forget something or get confused and ‘haha im so delusional lmao’ no ur not please stfu. same thing with panic attack?? mild indecisiveness over what to eat for dinner? ‘omg i had such a panic attack.’ parents catch them doing something mildly embarrassing? ‘panic attack’. couldn’t find their phone? ‘omggg i had SUCH a panic attack today.’

grrrrrr

[sukirichi]

hey Suki I just saw your rant and I hope you're doing okay. I don't know what you're going through but I truly hope you'll be able to feel better and be in a better place in the future! As far as I can tell you're a really amazing and really nice person as well, you're always answering our asks in a really gentle way and feeding us with content at the speed of light and for that I really appreciate you! You really deserve the best!

Sending tons of Naoyas and Haitani Brother in your way!!

But yeah I would like to be able to express myself better but I cant so I'll just leave these two fine ass men to take care of you now~ (totally not me starting to find Rindou attractive af while searching this for you.....)

KYAAAA omg thank you so much 🥺💕 yeah this week was hella rough for me but thankfully i managed to garner the courage to confront them head on and put myself in a better place so i am feeling better now !! though i suddenly had a case of writer’s block n im like URGGGHH but they don’t really last long, idk maybe i am just not up to writing today so i won’t beat myself up over it. friendly reminder to self its okay to not do everything i wanted to do !! And aaahhh Kya you’re always so kind and supportive me thank you very much, I really do mean it 😭 (I am still in the process of finding ur previous ask btw IM SORRY AHSKWKWK)

AAAAHH THE NAOYA’S AND HAITANI BROS frrrr i am down bad❗and omggg yes ofc Rindou is really attractive like imo, Rindou is hotter sexier just way way spicier in all aspects like PLS IM A RINDOU FUCKER TOO BUT I JUST STAN RAN MORE BCOS AJSKSKWA idk i can’t explain but like after looking at those photos idek anymore 😭

[itsjusta]

May 2, 2021

woke up at 8 kapin todaaay doeee cos idk kalit ko kamata and saba pd silingan 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ but i went back to sleep mga 10 man heheh after dat i just rested doeee there’s a kdrama im watching naman pd now hehehe but hapit napd nako human!!! 🤦🏻‍♀️ galisod raba gyd ko find drama nga ganahan nako doeee aishhh

issa i just had sandwich and iced coffee for lunch doeee cos not in da mood for rice hehe after dat issa just watch2 lang doeee and i went man to my old room cos so igang in my room uyy aishh i also got sapot a little while eating lunch cos mom issa hugaw2 da kitchen again and dili ga clean i have to mop always and its tiring doeee to clean and i didnt even hugaw it aishhh but i left dayon da kitchen dont want to get more sapot aishh

issa im still a litol bothered by sad thoughts today doeee but i didnt cry naaa hehe maybe cos dug on nako in a few days das why im so sensitive?? or maybe im just having bad days doooe hahah issa di man jd mawala having bad days esp cos im still healing from a lot of thingssss sometimes i get used it to it but sometimes i also cant get used to crying doeee hahah i’ve cried so much da past year i think isa nato ka dagat ako tears 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

i also thought about f2f doeee and ion know if im ready for that cos its gonna bring so many changes again :( aishhh ion want to undergo painful changes again doeee but i guess its lisod to stop gyddd and ion want to be alone when its f2fff hahaha aishhh i realized i really have no go-to friend here doeee haahh sauna its fine cos u were there but now omggg this is the reality that i must face hahha its gonna take awhile to get used to everything doe if daghan napd mag change but aish its fine i just have to try my best to get through it doeee and i shud practice dealing with my problems alone also ryt aishhh hahah

kanina 4:30 i did my part sa amo research paper doeee and final edits nalang kulang samo paper and we done na wid daaat omg if ma done nami just 3 exams left and im done with this sem!!! 😩 i hope i do good in da exams 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 i played codm 9-10:30 with kyla and chanler doeee hahha then watched kdrama againn dont wanna sleep early now so i didnt take my medsss aish and idk doeee dis was not a sad day but also not a good oneee ion know my heart is a litol heavy doeee hahah idk with me why i always have days like these aishhh but its okay doe one day i will have happy days againnnn i just have to keep going until muabot na dooeee

good night doeeee u know when u said u will always be there for me issa i cried a litol doe 🥺 cos idkkk im so thankful gyd and it makes me feel lighter to hear thatttt hahah but then i know u have ur own life doeee so aish dapat not nako sge rant to u about everything doeee hahah aishhh but so hard also to doe idk doeee its so kapoy to think about dat aish night aish i cried while writing dis uy issa maka emote huuuh

have a good day tomorrowwww i wish u all the happiness the world can offer! 💛 know that i always pray and will always pray for ur strength, success, and happiness doe. you may not think of me as your bestfriend anymore but i still think of u that way doe das why i want nothing but happiness for u. if you fall down, know that i am here to help u get back up doeee. im always just one call awayyy u know i will always answer ur call doe. thank u for letting me stay in ur life doooeee 🥺