#OKAY THAT’S ALL THANK YOU!! all of you are so lovely and respectful so i don’t anticipate any issues but putting this out there now

[ryebread0605]

Hii! Hope you're doing great.

Can you do dorm leaders of twisted wonderland with a mute or blind reader? ( male reader)

It's okay if not and thanks! (✿❛◡❛)

This is a very fun one to do cuz I love to see disability rep in fanfics (especially as a disabled person!) I hope you don’t mind that I did deaf and blind!

Riddle: 

he just thinks you’re ignoring him at first when he yells at you to go to specific areas you don’t know, which leads to many instances of the collar being put on you 

He gets curious when he sees deuce leading you around everywhere 

Started to get suspicious when he found out you do all your essays and readings through the computer

Yeah he’s not the type to figure out you are blind on his own

Finally comes to a head as you’re painting the roses, he comes behind you and goes “NO THOSE ARE BLUE NOT RED! WHAT, ARE YOU BLIND OR SOMETHING?” 

Awkward silence begins and it finally clicks 

Poor boy is apologetic beyond belief and will do anything in his power to make up for it

Goes out of his way to make sure every single corner in the heartslabyul form has a cushion against it so you won’t hurt yourself 

“I’m so sorry (name) I promise I didn’t know. Please, if there’s any way we can accommodate you more, let myself or Trey know!”

Leona:

at first, he sees you as weak, an easy target

Until he tries to sneak up on you and get an elbow straight to the gut

He can tell right away that you don’t let being blind hold you back and DAMN does he respect it

Jack is given the duty of being your eyes, seeing as you have numeral classes together and are both freshmen

He adds a detail to spelldrive so you can play, making it so the disc beeps when it’s close to you so you can catch it 

He will never admit that his instincts are telling him to take the small weak cub under his wing

“Look, in this dorm it’s survival of the fittest. If you’ve spent this long at NRC without being taken out by a dumbass, you got what it takes to be part of the dorm”

Azul:

because of the Sea Witch stories, it became mandatory for all merfolk to learn some version of sign language

He can easily spot you are deaf and tries to strike up a deal first, only he mixes it up in his mind and signs ‘date’ instead 

Both of you are blushing messes but why not? 

You help to properly teach him and the tweels proper sign language and in return you now have 3 powerful and influential men there to protect you at any time 

“I must ask, do you think it would be a fruitful venture to hold a paid for sign language class? Of course the proceeds would go to a charity! That charity being getting you those hearing aids you’ve been wanting”

Kalim:

Is very confused as you don’t seem to hear him at all, making him practically yell

Jamil has to be the one to tell him that you could just be deaf

This mans is FLUENT in sign and will have the best gossip to tell you that only you two can hear 

Jamil is happy cuz it keeps him out of trouble and keeps the dorm quiet

Until Kalim realizes he can raise the music so you can feel the bass 

“Isn’t this awesome! I knew you’d love this song! Everyone deserves the chance to party in Scarabia!”

Vil:

he has worked with plenty of people so it’s no surprise he knows how to sign 

During the SDC, he makes sure you have a seat closest to the speakers so you can feel the vibrations the best 

Offers several times to make you a hearing potion but accepts that it is a part of you that you wish to keep 

ASL is now mandatory to learn in the Pomefiore dorm (with permission from Crowley who sees this as an opportunity to show how inclusive his school is)

“(Name) how does this seat work for you? Is it close enough to the speaker? Or would you rather have an interpreter? Just let me know potato”

Idia:

it makes him feel so relaxed to know you can’t see him

You enjoy video games AND you can’t clock his looks? Hell yes

He’s ringing up STYX right away to sent a Cerberus unit as a guide dog for you 

If you are up to it, he would love to make cyber eyes for you to give you sight back

Gets super excited hanging out with you and lets himself be himself because in his eyes you can’t see him so you don’t judge him 

“-and yeah! He should be all set up for your fingerprint id! If any problems happen, like normies trying to get in your way, he has an op defense mode”

Malleus:

by FAR the most protective of you

Since you can’t see, he worries others will take advantage of that and he is NOT having that

He is your person guard dragon and will follow you around everywhere  

Has set up his nest in Diasomnia (because I like the idea that he keeps dragon instincts like nesting and hoarding) to include a tactile pathway to both the bathroom and door so you have more sense of freedom

If he can’t guard you, Lilia will. Lilia is a lot more ferocious in his guarding as he had blind soldiers when he was a general

“Child of man, if you need anything, money is no problem. I could get you set up with working eyes if you would like. But if you prefer how you are, that’s alright too”

[zinflo]

Mha or jjk men (doesn’t matter who) reaction to their kids snapping at their mom

Whoever you are, thank very much for your request ♥︎ I decided to go with JJK instead of MHA since I haven’t released any work yet in relation to JJK. Hope you like it! — 🐉 𓂃🖊

IT’S THE DISRESPECT FOR ME ☞.ᐣ.ᐟ

FEATURING ᯓ★ SATORU GOJO, SUGURU GETO, CHOSO KAMO, KENTO NANAMI, RYŌMEN SUKUNA + TOJI FUSHIGURO

SYNOPSIS ᯓ★ Their reaction to their kid snapping at their mother (you ♥︎)

CONTENT ᯓ★ Parent!reader, sfw/fluff, mild language, petnames

⌞ SATORU GOJO ⌝

✄┈┈★ Gojo for sure is definitely ‘THE PROTECTIVE DAD.’

✄┈┈★ He’s usually the fun, carefree parent that lets his kids have a lot of freedom, but disrespecting their mother? Hell to the no.

✄┈┈★ The moment his kid raises their voice at you, his usual playful demeanour has gone down the drain in a heartbeat. He gives them a serious, piercing stare from behind his signature blindfold, and his voice drops a few notches.

✄┈┈★ “Woah, c’mon now. You’ve just gone from zero to one hundred.” His steps are slow until he’s finally stood right by your side but also in front of his child. “Change that tone because you don’t get to talk to your mum like that. Apologize. Now.”

✄┈┈★ If they continue to be stubborn and refuse to apologise, he kneels down to their level, still calm but firm, and asks them why they think it’s okay to act that way. Gojo wants his kid to reflect on their actions rather than just apologize for the sake of it.

✄┈┈★ Once the situation cools down, he makes sure to remind them how much you do for them. “Your mum is hardworkin’, amazin’ and is the main reason why you even get to live like a little prince/princess. Show some respect.”

✄┈┈★ Later, he’ll go back to being his usual goofy self where he wraps his arms around your waist, his soft lips brushing against your ear. “Don’t mind them, you’re still a great mum to them, sweetheart. Just give them some time, that's all.”

⌞ SUGURU GETO ⌝

✄┈┈★ Honestly? Geto just screams ‘THE WISE DAD.’

✄┈┈★ His ideology when it comes to parenting consists of being gentle yet firm discipline and doesn’t tolerate disrespect towards you. There’s simply no arguing about it.

✄┈┈★ So the moment he hears his child snap at you, his expression darkens. “Excuse me? I know damn well I’m not going deaf. So prove me wrong and try saying that again, but with respect this time.”

✄┈┈★ If they talk back, he gives them a calm but chilling stare that immediately makes them regret it. He’s not one to raise his voice—his disappointment is enough to make them feel guilty. This man is appalled, he does and I mean DOES NOT want his child to grow up acting like those monkeys with no manners or respect.

✄┈┈★ If the child is still stubborn, he removes privileges—no going out to hang with friends, no social media, until they apologize and genuinely understand their mistake.

✄┈┈★ After everything is settled, he always makes sure to reassure them with a hug but reminds them: “Respect goes both ways. You give it, you get it.”

✄┈┈★ As you both watch them walk away to their bedroom to sulk away, Geto grabs your chin in a firm grip before planting a soft peck on your forehead. “God, I love you dear but I think maybe you should give my parentin’ style a go. It’ll teach them to know their place, hm?”

⌞ CHOSO KAMO ⌝

✄┈┈★ The family oriented guy is 100% ‘THE GENTLE DAD.’

✄┈┈★ Choso rarely gets angry, but when he does, it’s serious.

✄┈┈★ The moment he hears his child snap at you, his protective instincts kick in, and he immediately steps in between you and the child. “That’s not how we talk to our mother.” His voice is low but firm.

✄┈┈★ If the child argues, he stares them down silently—his disappointed expression is worse than being yelled at.

✄┈┈★ He believes in talking things out, so he kneels and asks, “Why are you upset? Tell me, so we can fix this together.” He wants them to understand that frustration doesn’t justify rudeness.

✄┈┈★ He won’t force an immediate apology, but he will expect them to reflect and apologize on their own. If they don’t, he withholds affection—no cuddles, no high fives/fist pumps or no warm interactions until they understand.

✄┈┈★ Once they do apologize, he pulls them into a long hug and tells them, “We respect each other in this family. Especially your mother.”

✄┈┈★ While the child is in Choso’s embrace, Choso looks up and meets your eyes. He winks and his lips curl upwards before mouthing, ��love you, angel.”

⌞ KENTO NANAMI ⌝

✄┈┈★ Strict? For sure ‘THE AUTHORITATIVE DAD.’

✄┈┈★ Nanami rarely raises his voice, but he’s for damn sure not letting disrespect slide when it comes to you.

✄┈┈★ The moment the child snaps, he immediately calls them out in a stern but controlled tone. “Enough! That is no way to be speakin’ to your mother like that.”

✄┈┈★ If the child continues, he simply says, “Go to your room. Now. We will talk when you are calm.” He refuses to entertain arguments in the heat of the moment.

✄┈┈★ Once they’ve cooled down, he sits them down and gets down to business, “Disagreements happen, but respect should never be lost. Your mother loves you and works hard for you. Don’t think you can speak to her how ever you like because I won’t allow it.”

✄┈┈★ He expects a proper apology, not just a mumbled “sorry.” If they don’t mean it, he waits patiently until they do.

✄┈┈★ Afterwards, he makes sure they understand that family is built on mutual respect, and he reassures them with a firm but comforting pat on the head.

✄┈┈★ Once he leaves the child alone in their bedroom to reflect on their actions, he’s met with you leaning your head against the wall so you can listen in on their conversation. A smirk crept up his face as he cupped your cheeks with his hands and locked eyes with you. “I’m sorry about before, honey. You’re perfect with everything you do, even if your way of parenting is more lenient than mine.”

⌞ RYŌMEN SUKUNA ⌝

✄┈┈★ Yeah… let’s all back away from ‘THE RUTHLESS DAD.’

✄┈┈★ Because that child is literally cooked. Without negotiation, the King of Curses expects obedience and respect so he’s pissed the moment he hears the disrespect.

✄┈┈★ His rage is instant. His sharp eyes glare down at the child all the while one of his beefy hands has hooked itself around the child’s shirt and lifted them off the ground so they’re now eye level to him. “What the hell did you just say, you brat? I know damn well you’re not talkin’ to your mother with that damn mouth of yours.” His voice alone is enough to make them regret it.

✄┈┈★ when I said that child was cooked from the beginning—I meant it. He doesn’t give warnings—his child is immediately disciplined and does not give a damn. Depending on the severity, it could be a timeout, harsh scolding, or taking away privileges. “If you go low, I’ll go lower. Two can play at that game, you ungrateful brat.���

✄┈┈★ He doesn’t tolerate disobedience. If the kid refuses to apologize, he stares them down with his four eyes in pure silence, letting the tension build and the child certainly shaking since his true form is already intimidating as it is.

✄┈┈★ “You think you can talk to my wife like that? Know your place under this household because you wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for her.” He makes sure they understand that you come first.

✄┈┈★ Once the child apologises to you, he doesn’t get all warm and sweet. His only response is a curt, “Good. Don’t do it again.”

✄┈┈★ However, he secretly keeps an eye on them afterward to make sure they truly understand the lesson. He then turns to you, looking you up and down to see if you’re mentally doing okay before ruffling your hair and rolling his eyes. “Tch, I’m not surprised that annoyin’ brat got disrespectful towards you. You’re too damn soft for your own kind, darling.”

⌞ TOji FUSHIGURO ⌝

✄┈┈★ Toji don’t play, he’s ‘THE STRAIGHTFORWARD DAD.’

✄┈┈★ No ifs or buts, there’s simply no valid explanation for why his kid thinks it is okay to snap at you and would be out of his damn mind to even allow it to happen.

✄┈┈★ The second he hears the kid snap, he’s already standing up by your side. “You’ve got a damn loose mouth, huh?” His voice is sharp, and the atmosphere immediately shifts.

✄┈┈★ He doesn’t yell, but the intensity of his presence is enough to make the kid freeze in their stop. His eyes narrow, and his tone is cold. “Cat got your tongue, hm? Try again. Nicely.”

✄┈┈★ If they don’t apologize, he crosses his arms and waits in silence—because he knows his patience alone is terrifying.

✄┈┈★ He’ll tell them straight up: “Your mum is the only reason why you have a roof over your head and eating three meals a day. You wanna act like spoiled kid? Then you can handle things yourself.”

✄┈┈★ Toji enforces consequences immediately—no dinner, extra chores, something to occupy their mind and realize their mistake.

✄┈┈★ Later, once they’ve apologized, he ruffles their hair roughly and mutters, “Don’t let me catch you doin’ that again. I mean it.” He won’t be overly affectionate, but his point is made.

✄┈┈★ His expression changes when he looks towards you, grasping your hand to pull you closer to his broad chest and gently pecking your cheek before saying, “Stand your ground, baby. And show them next time who’s boss around this house.”

[grimesve1l]

Dessert

Read previous part here

Summary: It's been a while since Rafe decided to change and things couldnt be better for him and Y/n

Warnings: Swearing, suggestiveness, smut (mdni), oral m!receiving, p in v, lowk dom!Rafe, lemme know if i missed any!!

Rafe was woken up out of his sleep by the back of Y/n's hand hitting his head. He moved her hand and looked to see her still fast asleep. "Damn." he said barely awake. Although they'd been living together for a couple weeks at this point he was still getting used to her many quirks. One of which being how much she moved in her sleep.

He looks at the clock on his nightstand and notices it's about time for him to get up. Ever since he got his act together, his life has gotten so much better. He got sober and quit selling which put him in much better standing with his dad. In fact the reason he's getting up so early is because his dad is wants him to come to a meeting regarding the company's next big project.

He also started prioritizing his relationship with Y/n. The night of the kegger he promised himself he would change and be better for her and he's kept good on that promise. Hell, he even tolerates her friendship with the pouges. He's still not a big fan of theirs but as Y/n says he's taking "baby steps".

Rafe had just gotten out of the shower and was grabbing some clothes when he heard a whistle come from behind him. He turns to see Y/n propped up in the bed watching him. "You enjoying the show?" he asks. "Mhm but i'd enjoy it more without the towel." she responds motioning to his waist.

"I bet you would, you freak." he responds jokingly before turning back to his underwear drawer. "I thought you liked me being a freak." she answers, getting out of the bed. She moves to wrap her arms around his waist. "Oh, trust me baby I love you being a freak." he says looking over his shoulder.

She laughs and goes to brush her teeth but not before delivering a swat to Rafes ass. "Hey!" he calls as she giggles on her way to the bathroom.

Rafe had suggested that she quit her job at the country club but she wanted to have something to keep her occupied during the day. Now the two were getting ready to leave and get their day started. They were walking out of the house when Rafe grabbed her arm.

She turns to look at him and he smiles before leaning down and pressing a kiss to her lips. "Have a good day, baby." he says once he pulls away. "You too, love you." she replies. "I love you too." he says as he lets her go. They both get in their respective vehicles and head out.

For Y/n the day went by fast. Being a cart girl has its ups and downs but she can't say she doesn't enjoy it. Rafe on the other hand had mixed feelings about his role in his father's company. He loves that his father trusts him enough to be so involved but he also can't stand the boring meetings and long nights.

Y/n knows this and during her shift she decides that when she gets off she'll rush home so that Rafe can return home to a nice dinner. Once it's time for her to leave she puts her plan into motion. She hurries home and starts cooking.

She gets so occupied on making sure things are right for when she came home that she doesn't notice Rafe's truck pulling in the driveway. When he walks in every thing is exactly how she wanted it except her. She had planned to change into something much nicer than her uniform from the county club but she lost track of time.

She's grabbing plates out of the cabinet when she feels his arms wrap around her waist. She jumps, not expecting it. "When did you get home?" she exclaims. "Just now." he responds laughing at her confused expression. "What's all this?" he asks motioning to the meal Y/n had prepared.

"You've been working so hard lately and I wanted to give you a little surprise." Y/n says with a grin. "Awe thank you baby." Rafe replies pressing a kiss to her head. "Go sit down I'm almost done." she tells him as she ushers him out of the kitchen. "Okay okay." he says putting his hands up and heading to the table.

Y/n finishes cooking and plates the food before she brings it to the table. She sets Rafes plate down in front of him and does the same with hers before she takes a seat. "Oh my God. This is so good babe." Rafe says after taking a bite of his food.

She laughs before thanking him. The two make small talk about their day as they eat their meal. Y/n doesn't miss the way Rafes brow furrows when he talks about how stressful his new position is becoming. Once they finish eating Y/n takes the plates to the kitchen but tells Rafe to stay at the table for dessert.

"Damn, how long were you cooking?" he responds leaning back in his chair. He hears her laugh in response but for some reason she sounds farther away than the kitchen. He waits for a couple minutes before hearing heels approaching the room.

He's confused because he could have swore she was wearing tennis shoes. Suddenly Y/n appears in the door way in the skimpiest lingerie he's ever seen. "What do you think?" she asks walking towards him. He doesn't answer and simply stares at the way the material accentuates the curves of her body.

She makes her way to him and sits in his lap facing him. He puts his hands on her hips as he continues admiring her. "So, this is my dessert?" he asks now letting his hands roam. "Mhm. You like it?" she answers leaning forward so her chest is closer to his face. "Fuck, baby." he says looking down.

She takes this as her queue to connect their lips. He quickly takes control of the kiss as he pulls her head back by her hair. She gasps which gives him the opportunity to thirst his tongue into her mouth. Their tongues tangle together as Y/n begins to grind her hips against him.

He grunts into her mouth as she feels his erection growing under her. He moves his hands to lift her onto the table but she stops him. "Not yet." she says getting off his lap and sinking to her knees in front of him. "Oh shit." he says leaning back realizing what she's about to do.

Y/n unzips Rafes pants and takes his cock out of his boxers. She wraps her hand around it and starts stroking him. As her hand moves up and down she takes his tip in her mouth. She hears Rafes breath catch as she begins to take more of him. She works her way down until his cock hits the back of her throat.

She comes out just for a moment before she returns to her previous actions but this time she starts bobbing her head. He continuously hits the back of her throat as gagging and slobbering sounds can be heard throughout the room. Rafe takes her hair in his hand, making a makeshift ponytail.

He starts thrusting his hips before telling her he won't last much longer. She continues bobbing her head up and down until Rafes hips stop and she feels his release spurt into her mouth. She pulls back before swallowing what's in her mouth and going to like what's left on his cock.

"You look so sexy on your knees like that baby." Rafe says looking down at her. She stands up and gives Rafe a look he knows too well. He quickly stands as well before picking her up and placing her on the table. He pushes anything that could be in the way and gently lays her back.

He spreads her legs and pulls her panties to the side to see her already soaking cunt. "Sucking my dick gets you this wet? Huh?" he asks running his finger through her folds. She only whines in response. He suddenly thrusts a finger into her. "I asked you a question." he says.

"Yes." she cries out as he starts pumping his finger in and out of her as he uses his thumb to play with her clit. He reaches up to pull her tits out of the lacy bra she's wearing. "You want me to fuck you?" he asks speeding up his hand. Once again Y/n can't respond. This time he takes her nipple and pinches it enough to bring her back.

"Answer me, Y/n." he says. "Yes, I want you to fuck me." she responds desperately. "Was that so hard?" Rafe responds as he pulls his finger out and lines his dick up. He slowly inches in until he's halfway. He pauses to look her in the eyes before he thrusts all the way in. This makes Y/n cry out as Rafe begins rapidly thrusting into her.

He takes her legs and pulls her so that her ass is hanging off the table and he's supporting her. He continues thrusting as he takes his hand and begins playing with her clit again. "I don't know how much I can take." she says as she lays on the table helplessly. "You can take it baby." he tells her.

Soon his thrusts get sloppier and he knows he's about to cum again. "Cum inside me." she tells him. "What?" he answers, thinking he heard her wrong. "I got on the pill just please cum inside me." she responds. This is all it takes for Rafe to speed back up. Rafe cums first and Y/n follows soon after.

He maneuvers her so she's back on the table and he leans against it. He pulls out and watches as his cum drips out onto the floor. "Rafe?" she calls out to him. "Yeah?" he responds. "Can you help me take this off. I have a wedgie and I can't feel my legs right now." she tells him.

He laughs before agreeing. He decides to carry her to their bedroom where he helps her get out of the lingerie and they get cleaned up. After they clean up they decide to lay down for the night. As they lay back in bed Y/n asks about the mess in the dining room.

Rafe tells her he'll take care of it tomorrow before pulling her closer. The mess can wait. Right now all he wants to do is hold his perfect girl.

A/n: this was supposed to be fluff. idk what happened but I hope y'all liked it anyway! Also this may be the last part of the barry's cousin!reader series, i'm not sure yet but lemme know if y'all want more!!<3

[exormilion]

vermilion tenderness

abby anderson/reader

word count: 4,144

summary: abby makes your endometriosis a bit more bearable. period comfort, non sexual nudity and intimacy.

note: i suffer a lot with my periods and decided to really write something endo-related cuz i think we deserve sum love and care <3 hope you like it :D

link to ao3

─୨ৎ────────୨ৎ────────୨ৎ─

You were used to it by now.

Okay, well, maybe ‘used’ wasn't the right word when you were curled in bed with tears in your eyes and head pounding while you curled your arms around your belly, desperate for relief, but you already knew how it went.

This agony never had an end, all you could do was survive through it.

When you first arrived at the WLF, you did your best to keep it down. You were weak, this place was all you had now and you tried your damn best not to seem useless, a waste of resource, pushing past limits that had you sobbing quietly into your pillow at night, trying not to bother your past roomate.

It all went down the drain when you passed out during patrol, the warm day piling up with the cramps and the dizziness and you just faceplanted the soft grass, the sudden silence weirdly comforting and when you finally opened your eyes, strong arms held you sitted and supported your head, a woman with beautiful light eyes and angelic dark blonde hair and-

“Abby?”, you ask, mortified, finally coming back to yourself. You barely talked to the woman, too intimidated by her build, fame and friends, the popularity around her name was enough to keep you away. Her eyebrows were furrowed, face tense as she scanned you for any bruise. Eyeing around, you were glad it was at least the two of you, the other people patrolling far enough not to hear or see your embarrassing moment.

“What happened? Are you okay?”, she looks at your face, putting her palm on your sweaty, strangely cold skin, “You’re pale, have you eaten?”

Yeah, you have. You just had to make a quick stop to throw up until you were dry retching before the patrol, the nausea so intense you were praying you wouldn’t vomit bile on the car, eyes strained to your boots as you clutched your gun to your chest, breathing through your mouth and swallowing thickly.

“No, i- It’s fine. I tripped. Sorry.”, muttering, you tried your best to get away from her grasp, dying from embarrassment. She respected that but stayed kneeled on the floor next to you, curious.

“Tripped? Yeah, sure. On grass.”, her eyes studied around for the colleagues, and after making sure you were still alone and safe, she took her backpack from her back and looked for something inside.

You just sat there, still dizzy, feeling your fingers tingling and vision splotchy. It wasn’t worth trying to stay composed, she found you dropped to the floor like a brick and the damage was alredy done.

You blink when she offers you something - a silver package, and you look up at her in confusion.

“Food. Take a bite, looks like you need it”, she nudges your hand with it, expectantly.

You felt like crying. Just the idea of eating made you want to vomit, but the care in the act was enough to make you hold it down. Nodding, you take the wrap, opening the sandwich and taking a piece of the bread with your hand, chewing almost painfully on the bite.

“Thanks”, you swallow, your upset stomach alredy churning but you did your beat to swallow another two pieces before giving it back to her, wrapped carefully. She didn't comment on your lack of enthusiasm about food.

“No problem”, she puts the sandwich inside her bag again, still curious about your state. “You sure you’re okay?”

You nod, fixing your backpack and taking your gun from where it was dropped, getting up slowly on shaky legs.

Able to walk again like a baby deer, you went back to patrol. You could feel Abby now following around and you couldn't even be mad about it - despite the embarrassment, it was somehow comforting to know that she would still look after you, even if you were pulling the team down.

The real shame would crawl inside your guts later, getting out of the truck. You both were the last to leave the trunk, Abby offering a hand to help with the big step and you could cry from how thankful you felt, the cramps down to your thighs and knees made the simple act seem like a mile run. Your feet hit the floor, you’re glad the truck ride is over, hands clutching your backpack strips anxiously.

“Oh, wait-”, she holds your wrist to hold you from leaving and told the other colleagues to go ahead as she wanted to talk to you. You were tired, in pain and now so anxious about the talk that you could faint all over again. “You… could have told me it was your period, you know? I know we barely talked, but i know it can be hard”

You swallow, face heating up. She looked shy about the topic and for someone her size she was extremely sensitive.

“How do you-”

Gasping, the awareness hits you. Did you leak? The uncomfortable warmth and stickiness between your legs couldn't have gone past the pad, right?

“Hey, it’s alright. Look, i can walk you to your room, i’m sure no one noticed it”, patting your shoulder gently, she nods her head, “It scared me, seing you unconscious like that. Come on, you could use some rest.”

The walk to your room was a bit awkward, Abby doing her best to shield the blood from behind your pants while you fidget with your thumbs till you were standing in front of your room, pondering what to do now.

“There you go. You should take a shower and rest for a bit”, another minute of silence follows before she speaks again, “Is it… always this bad? Your periods?”

“Yeah, it is”, Abby frowned at your answer. That wasn't normal, was it? “I’m used to it, it just gets worse from time to time”

“To the point you pass out?”

“Well, sometimes-”

“Have you talked to Nora?”

You haven’t, and you didn’t plan to - that was until Abby forced you to see the woman a few days after that talk, with a pang in her heart since you were still in terrible pain and bleeding but it would probably be for the better if Nora could see and understand how you were feeling.

Abby didn’t know why, but she was worried sick about you. When you first arrived, hurt, alone and nervously curled into yourself, she didn’t think much of it. She said a few words to you here and there, nothing that justified her need to take care of you but that was just how Abby was. She cared.

Nora asked you a feel questions, felt your bloated belly with the tips of her fingers (apologizing when you hissed and tensed but she wanted to understand the issue) while Abby sat on a stool by the exit of the closed tent, looking down at her hands respectfully but listening carefully.

“We don’t have much left about gynecology, the few books i managed to put my hands in wasn’t near enough…”, Nora helps you sit up on the gurney. She was pretty nice, you liked her - even if it was only because of Abby, not a lot of people validated your pain. “But there is this one condition called endometriosis and from what you’ve told me, it’s very fitting with your symptoms”

Abby perked up on her sit, looking curiously at her friend while she explained briefly how it worked. The conclusion made your shoulders sag and the blonde tense up.

“So there’s nothing to do about it?”, reluctantly she asked, sitting straight on the stool.

“There was never much study about it before the outbreak, so nothing is clear… i’m sorry”, Nora squeezes your shoulder, sighing. “The best you can do is always try to eat a bit to help with the dizziness, even when you’re nauseous, and stay hydrated. I mean very hydrated, as much as you can, you lose too much blood and throwing up as well… not good”

Great. Now that was a way of living.

“And”, she walks to her desk and takes a heavy green bag, preparing to leave. Nora never stayed at the same place for more than ten minutes - it was not easy to be a medic, “I’ll try to separate some meds and hygiene products that arrive to this wing when i can. It’s the best i can do. Sorry, i have to go, need to tend some guys that found a group of scars on patrol. Take care.”

She gave you a small smile and a nod, moving to the door. You heard her mutter a ‘look after her, hm?’ to Abby before disappearing from the medical tent, leaving behind your disappointed and tired self and the buff woman sitting awkwardly on the stool.

Chewing on the inside of your cheek, you kick your feet from where you where sitting on the gurney, getting up with a grunt. You look at Abby who got up as stepped closer and your tongue worked before you could think about it.

“Why… exactly are you doing this? You don’t have to waste your time, i won’t hold you guys behind”, eyes finding the floor when you notice her approach, you almost jump out of your skin when her rough palm finds your forearm, trying to get your attention.

“That’s not what i worry about, i’m worried about you”, that makes you huff and glare at her.

“Why would you worry about me?”, you laugh, rubbing your eyes. You were in so much pain that your thoughts were cloudy and you just wanted to scream and cry and turn into a little ball. “I just got here a few months ago, you barely know me… what do you want from me?”

She took your wrists in her hands, holding your hand away from your face so she could look right into your eyes when she talked to you.

“I don’t want anything, i just want you to feel a little better. That’s all.” her cheeks got a cute shade of pink as she thought about her words “I told you before, but i got really worried when i saw you passed out on patrol that day. I’m sorry if it’s making you uncomfortable, it wasn't my intention to suffocate you, i just… i can’t shake this feeling off”

Two weeks after that, you pulled her into a kiss.

She was teaching you how to shoot - you knew your way with a pistol, but bigger guns were still a work in progress and Abby was happy to give you a bit of her knowledge when period was over and the cramps lingering wasn’t nearly as bad as before.

Shotguns were scary, you quickly find out, the earmuffs did nothing to cover up the sound and by the time Abby put the thing in your hands, you could hear a ringing noise echoing.

“... got it?”

You didn’t, but you weren’t weak.

Holding the gun up like she did - or almost, as she brought one hand to your scapula and the other to your elbow, the booth tiny enough that she was almost pressed to you. Even with the earmuffs, you felt her voice deep in your ears.

“There we go. Keep your stance firm and you’re good.”

“Okay…”

You were definitely not as firm as you should, distracted by her. The recoil made the gun slam on your shoulder and almost hit your face, nothing much happened but the scare made you let out a yelp and widen your eyes.

“You okay?”, she laughed but eyed you with concern, taking off her earmuffs. “Recoil is the worst part, but you did well.”

The gun was put on the little desk as well as both earmuffs, you lean your hips against it to look at her, heart still strong on your chest.

“M good, just scared me. Should probably stick to a pistol till i get the grip, though”, you laughed too.

The smell of gunpowder was grounding, Abby smelled like gunpowder most of the time and you got used to it pretty quickly.

You got used to Abby pretty quickly - not only that but the hope of spending time with her lingered, specially when she checked on you everyday, asking about your pain and bringing you food when you felt bad enough not to go to the cafeteria. No one has ever shown this amount of care for you.

“You’ll learn quick, you’re doing well”, she walked closer to you on the table to unload the gun, your eyes attentive to her experienced hands as she did.

She was so kind to you. You wondered what you have done to possibly deserve a woman like that willingly wanting to make you feel better and caring for you, it made your heart clench on your chest.

“Mhm, i have a great professor”, tilting your head to the side, you notice how her hands falter on the gun and a stupid little smile finds her lips. She glances at you, something you didn’t know shining in her eyes.

“Oh? Should i be concerned about this professor of yours taking my teaching spot?”

Fuck.

“Hmmm, dunno. She’s really great…”

She completely abandoned the gun, crossing her arms over her chest with her head tilted as she stared into your face. Her forearms looked specially beefy and veiny when she did so, her usual thank top leaving nothing to imagination.

“I’ll go after this teacher of yous, tell her to be careful… no one steals my student like that”

You know what? Fuck this.

Wasn’t worth overthinking about this, specially not when Abby’s lips were so incredibly soft and her big body fit so comfortably against yours, her arms hugging you closer and making you feel tiny and safe. You weren’t able to spend a single day without her lips after that.

But that was months ago, and now you were sad and lonely and in indescribable pain inside yours and Abby’s room, a few desolated tears running down your face.

Your gut was telling you about something being off for a few days, but you were almost always in pain so it didn’t mean much until you woke up in the middle of the night in unbearable pain and raw red blood almost pooling under you. Abby woke with your movements and let out a compassionate hiss, arms dropping from your waist as she got up to help you to the bathroom. She was a blessed human.

Now, hours later, the bloodied sheets were gone, a washed out green one taking its place and the matress stained. Abby had to leave you to do something with someone - you didn’t know, you were so deep in pain when she talked that you just stared at her pretty face and nodded until she left with a kiss on the tip of your nose and another on your lips, saying she’d be back soon and wishing you better.

Not able to do anything but sulk, you stayed there. You got up twice the whole day, both to go to the bathroom and change the overfilling pads and pee painfully, quickly back to the cocoon on the bed and miraculously falling asleep.

It was restless and deep, somehow. You woke up feeling like you were ran over but the sun was alredy setting in the distance so it was a very long nap, enough for Abby to be back and sat by the end of the bed with a book in hand, the other gently gripping at your foot as she read.

Always the physical contact lover.

“Hey”, your voice was hoarse, breaking. She immediately closed the book and scooched closer to your head, laying next to you to put her face closer to yours.

“Hey, baby”, the kiss she gave your forehead felt almost healing, but maybe that was just her presence. “Still that bad?”

“Yeah, not good”, rasping out, you bury your face on her chest. She showered, smelled clean and so Abby, and you wished you could’ve showered with her. “Could've woken me… when you got back”

“You looked so tired even in your sleep, didn’t have the heart to bother your rest”, her arms wrapped around you, one of her hands slipping under your shirt to rub your lower back. It was a bad cramping spot but her hands always soothed you, even if just a tiny bit.

“Hm, but i wanna be with you…”

“I’m with you now, baby. Don’t worry”, she cooed, pressing you closer to her chest. “Did you eat anything today?”

The answer was a shake of your head. She expected that and didn’t pry, instead putting you delicately back in bed (she had to kiss you a few times and whisper against your mouth that she was not leaving and just needed to get something until you released her shirt) and finding her bag on the couch. You looked at her with half lidded eyes, a déja-vu hitting you when she took a wrapping and walked back to bed, sitting on the edge.

“Abby”, you whine, turning to the other side and pulling the comforter to your ears, “Don’t wanna eat, i’ll just throw it all up. It’s useless.”

Always so patient with you, she pulled the comforter down, getting your ear between her thumb and pointer and squeezing just a bit.

“I know you get sick, baby. I’ll never understand how it feels but i see how bad it gets and i hate seeing you like that. I’d never do this if it wasn’t for your own good.”, she cupped your cheek and turned your face in her direction, caressing your skin, “But the more you stay without eating the sicker you’ll get, and you can’t go without food forever. Please, just a bite? Just one?”

You hate her stupid puppy eyes and how they always work.

With her help, you sit up in bed. She moves to stay behind you and pulls your back against her chest, not minding your disgustingly sweaty shirt and clammy skin.

“I don’t wanna eat”, your murmur was almost tearful as you watched her open the burrito wrap, turning your face away against her arm to get away from the smell.

“Baby”, she cups your face with her free hand to look at you from an awkward angle thanks to the position you both sat on, concerned eyes finding yours with care. “Hey. I promise i won’t make you eat more than one bite, but you need to have a little something to eat today. I can’t even give you any meds if your stomach is this empty, ‘s not good for you.”

You held your breath while you chewed the damn thing to hide the taste and swallowed hard. You pushed the wrap back into her hand and sighed, gripping her thigh with discomfort.

“Hate this.”

“I know, baby, i hate it too”, she pecked your shoulder, leaving the food somewhere behind her on the bed. “What do you think about a warm shower?”

“Sounds heavenly, actually”, leaning your head back against her shoulder when you were sure the food wasn’t coming up again, you look at her through your lashes. “I know you already showered but can you help me?”

“Of course i can”, she gets up and takes you in her arms, one hand behind your knees and the other on your lower back, the walk to the bathroom was nothing to her while she held your weight.

“You didn’t have to carry me, you know”, you laugh, kissing her cheek before she put you sat on the toilet lid.

“I wanted to”, booped your nose, stretching her arm inside the shower to turn the hot water on. “Isn’t that the whole reason i work out? To carry my girlfriend anywhere she needs me to?”

“Mhm, that’s right. Work it, Anderson”

She helped you undress, your hand never leaving her shoulder since your dizziness has been a pain in the ass. Abby was completely unbothered by your blood and all the disgusting things surrounding this - she loved taking care of you, this would never be enough to push her away. Taking advantage of the fact she was crouched in front of you, a gentle kiss was given to your bloated lower belly, right under your bellybutton.

“I saw the dogs today. Helped Mel with the cleaning, Bear licked my entire face”, she got up and kicked her own clothes off. Her hands were gentle when she tied your hair away from your face and neck, not wanting to get it wet as it was already pretty late. By the time you had the spray of hot water on your back, blood dripped down your legs, turning the puddle under your feet a nasty orange color. She didn’t care, just found the soap and started washing your body. “Alice was Alice, always with that purple octopus she likes so much. They are just like little kids.”

“I love them so much”, you sigh, dropping your forehead on her shoulder. Being skin to skin with Abby made everything better - she was always so warm, so incredibly soft despite the muscles. You wish you could turn smaller to curl into a little ball and sleep on her tummy, like a cat.

“I love you”, her hands bring soap to your neck, rubbing the tender spots with the tips of fingers.

“Love you more”

She washed every inch of your skin with extreme care. Under your arms, your chest, belly, legs and feet, between your legs and, lastly, your face. She gathered soap on the tip of her fingers and massaged your cheeks, mindful of your eyes, your arms hugging her waist while she did so.

“Skin is so soft”, mutters her loving voice, brushing the bubbles from your face with her wet hand. She didn’t shower again, having undressed only to keep her clothes dry, working quick for a fast but calming shower, aware of the fact you only needed the bed and rest in moments like this.

Making sure you were stabilized and snuggled up with a towel, she left the bathroom just for a minute to look for a pair of panties. You’d both normally sleep naked with every inch of skin glued together - why she didn’t dress up again -, so your only coverage was the underwear with the pad safely stuck inside (bless Nora for actually saving a few for you) that Abby pulled carefully up your legs.

“Thanks, Abs. For all of this”, you put your towel back on the hook, suddenly fatigued all over again.

“Don’t thank me, baby. You know I love being able to take care of you”

Then you found yourself in bed again, heavy covers over your body and tangled with Abby. You laid on your belly (somehow, the pressure of the mattress on your belly helped a lot), Abby cuddled to your side with her cheek pressed on your shoulder and her arm resting on your lower back, caressing the skin from the side of your body with her rough fingers.

Always warm, always gentle. You never got tired of surprising yourself with how soft she could be.

You could feel her breast pressed against your arm and back, deep breathing pressing it harder into your skin and her heartbeat was strong, just like her heart. Selfless, big, pulsing hard inside that body but not for her own sake, never just that.

You turn to your side, getting face to face with her. Your whole body ached, the cramps were slowly creeping up your spine but nothing seemed as bad when her beautifully shiny eyes stared at you like you were the sun, even when you were in pain and insufferable.

One of your hands finds that little spot in the middle of her chest, feeling her heart in your palm. You wished you could cradle her pretty heart in your arms and tend to every little pain caused to it.

“Really, Abigail. I love you so, so much. Thank you for always taking care of me.”

And her smile. The way her cheeks went up and her cute little freckles moved with her skin, a little more apparent thanks to the summer sun, her eyes just a little squinted and always looking at you, her pouty lips pulled into the most beautiful and warm smile to ever exist.

The menstrual hormones were killing you. You wanted to bawl your eyes out every time you looked at your own girlfriend.

“There is nothing in this world I would rather do instead of taking care of you, baby. I love you more than anything and it means everything to me”, she kisses your lips, softly, and pulls you closer. “Now rest. Let’s sleep a bit of this pain away.”

[amalthea-13]

Hi again! Same anon!! Thanks for responding!! I wanna respond again if that's okay. Again, if not then feel free to delete.

First thing is that I really like that interpretation of Stolas's Striker line. I never saw it that way and when you did it felt really interesting. Originally I found it hard to emphasize with why he'd say that or bring it up at all. Even now I still kind of do, but that's a feeling thing. And it's what makes discussions like this super interesting to have.

I do agree that they're adults!! Which is why the clarity between them is so important. I wasn't trying to say that Blitzo didn't understand that the deal was wrong, he totally knows that! What I mean about Stolas being clearer and addressing specific things was how (and sorry I know now you don't like talking about it. Critics get stuck on it because it feels more important) the names and how that specifically made Blitzo feel. Not the deal. Like turning off the faucet is good(the transaction) but there's still all this water on the floor(the names). Absolutely does not need to go through every single thing he said wrong or meant This was but was taken as another, but tackling the deal alone doesn't feel like it Gets everything. The transaction is separate from the treatment is what I mean, hopefully that makes sense. And of course same to you, we don't see eye to eye but I don't think you're wrong. Perspective is cool like that

I don't agree with you on why Blitzo blew up the way he did or that he was only projecting. I find it really hard to see it that way, honestly. Which is fine, again I don't think you're wrong. I think he was saying how he felt about the behavior. Not taking Stolas seriously because he didn't believe him, not because he has a poor image of himself (he does, not denying that!) but because there wasn't anything countering that Stolas felt the same way. In his perspective, I mean. I think Blitzo didn't see him as a person and kept the thought that it was the same the other way. That it WAS a kink thing, and in exchange for being mostly cool with that and engaging that way he gets the book. So when Stolas starts leaving and laying his own perception of Blitzo's "answer" to his own feelings/dismissing him and Blitzo gets upset about "Feelings Bullshit" being sprung on him. It feels like the blame for not taking Stolas seriously is solely on Blitzo when he wasn't even close to saying that or feeling that way. If this makes sense? I hope it does xndkdj.

They aren't really understanding or listening to each other. Or giving a lot of room to see the other's full perspective. They're also being very people about it and not saying everything they mean properly, the clarity that these two absolutely need.

(Back at the Striker thing oooo I love that a lot) Reading your response made me feel a little different about the "I don't look down on you." Blitzo just doesn't believe it. But I really really can't vibe with the reason why he doesn't is because of self hatred. It rubs ME wrong lol. I do think Stolas learned!! I'm sorry if it seemed like I was saying he didn't. He did! He did!! Just that what he is learning and improving on isn't exactly what he should. "I don't look down on you" is right, he doesn't and is trying to respect and be genuine! But he didn't learn why Blitzo felt that way to begin with, and it was his treatment/behavior/the class divide(that while not there after mastermind anymore I personally don't feel like is the fixit all that they needed), not "Blitzo hates himself".

You did address them! Thank you :) Evidence is naturally very helpful. Yeah we don't see eye to eye but like I said in the start, it's these perspectives that make these discussions really interesting. We feel this and that very differently and it's because of this that and the third but we aren't really wrong about anything. Beauty of art or what the fuck ever LOL

You were very clear and I do understand the line of thought well. I hope I was clear too. Thank you!

OH and in the comments "It really doesn't help that Blitzo has been very avoidant with communication" VERY frustrating I agree. In my perfect world Stolitz has a break for a Really long time or reel in on what's on the line and just be friends. There's less stakes in a friendship. Blitzo has gotta get better at things, Stolas needs Time, they both should just tackle this all....Much Later.

Stolas, Blitz's Insecurities, and Context

Firstly, want to thank you again for being kind in my asks yet again. While we may not agree, I will take the time to tackle the arguments/disagreements in this since I like to be clear, concise, and understood in every discourse I have.

Lets dive in.

1.) Context Matters

When it comes to the line about Striker, context really matters. While I have no qualms with you bringing up that line, without the added context surrounding Striker and how Blitz sounded like him. Stolas was making a very pointed and direct point to make Blitz stop dehumanizing him and reflect on his behavior.

Striker was spewing ideas that would have in the end resulted in Stolas being dead. Blitz was regurgitating and restating the same ideologies bar for bar, and Stolas clocked it.

Him trying to contradict Blitz's thinking here was on purpose and then he pivots to make Blitz reflect;

Stolas: I don't look down on you! How many times do I ha- When have I ever?! You speak just like that vile Striker friend of yours. The one who tried to kill me and you couldn't be bothered to come help me. Remember him?

He made a point to say Blitz sounded like the same guy who nearly killed him and wanted his head just for being- born rich. The context paints a bigger picture about how Blitz feels about their relationship and the class imbalance between them. Blitz truly does not view Stolas as a person.

2.) Apologies for the Nicknames are POINTLESS

I'm going to try and remain civil with this point, because as a Stolas Stan, this specific argument is a never ending fucking nightmare with Blitz D!ckriders. I get a tad feral because honestly to apologize for the nicknames makes NO SENSE.

The nicknames and the transactional fuckings GO HAND IN HAND. The context of their relationship colored the way Stolas's statements and shitty flirting translated to Blitz. Therefore, yeah he did apologize for his behavior. As I said, he changed many of his behaviors abruptly to respect Blitz as a person.

Again, Blitz Defenders for some reason cling to these scenes for NO reason when they are long past and never been repeated in Season 2.

"But Amalthea it was never addressed!!!"

Stolas's entire fucking statement DOES address that the relationship as a whole, from its conception till now had been WRONG. I don't know how to address that anymore directly;

"But this transactional thing we have, it's not right anymore. It hasn't been. It never was. And now all I can see is how wrong it is to be so tethered to someone in such an unfair way... and not know how they feel."

Stolas realizes he never should have been so attached to Blitz in such an unequal dynamic that colored their relationship in the classist context it had. Stolas is sorry. He has changed behaviors, respected Blitz's work, and continues to support him even when it DOESN'T BENEFIT HIM.

I am kinda getting tired of driving this point home over and over, but he has done everything he should do, but somehow it is NEVER enough. At this point it feels like ya'll want him groveling at Blitz's feet apologizing for every single thing he said, when he already acknowledged it was wrong. I'm trying my best to not be aggressive about this point, but it just feels so unfair since Blitz has never, ever taken the time to apologize to Stolas for consistently traumatizing him, insulting him, embarrassing him at Ozzie's, I mean I can go on and on, but the only time we want apologies is when it comes from Stolas over a few lines of dialogue he never repeats and behaviors he stops, but Blitz can walk around being a bitch and no one bats a damn eye? C'mon now. This is a pointless argument that is biased against Stolas and is not a fair argument. Blitz Defenders, please let. it. go. It's one of those arguments that no matter how it's handled no one will be happy.

3.) Blitz's Projection onto Stolas

I am fully prepared to be alone on this argument, but I'd like to remind everyone here I have studied literature for roughly the last 4 years. So I ain't entirely senile or crazy or whatever else.

This is a matter of analyzing Blitz's claims about Stolas's behavior and providing substantiative evidence that he is projecting.

In the transcript this is Blitz's entire horrifying tirade:

Blitzo: Treat me like one of your little butler imps?! You can't just dismiss me like that! [He begins tearing up.] I mean, you royal fucks think you can do this EVERY TIME, like you can just play with our feelings because we're smaller and not as IMPORTANT! Well, I'm not letting you, BITCH! LET'S GO!

Claim #1: Being treated like a butler that he can be dismissed whenever Stolas pleases.

This claim holds very little water, but lets talk about the fact Blitz literally does this to Stolas. He only shows up for sex and only calls Stolas when he needs help or assistance. Outside of that Stolas consistently tries to contact Blitz on non work related topics and even tries to invite Blitz into his home to cuddle at some point.

Wanna talk about being called and dismissed whenever? Let's talk about Ozzie's because this shit pisses me the FUCK off.

You call him up, tell him it's a date, then publicly humiliate him, THEN, THEN you have the audacity to get mad at him for inviting you in and trying to in some sense comfort you, THEN yell at him and leave him there without a second thought.

Shit, almost like you called him up for something you needed then dismissed his ass when he was no longer useful.

Claim #2: Stolas Plays with Blitz's Feelings

AS IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN USING AND ABUSING HIS FEELINGS SINCE YOU TWO REUNITED, BLITZ!

Stolas:(blindfolded) You have no idea how long I've craved this kind of passion, and how much it means that the one who wants me is ... my first ever friend!

As if you didn't know this man has loved you since the beginning while he cried it out before your dumbass tried to leave. You really are going to sit here and tell me this man, Stolas of the Ars Goetia, the one who has waited on you for TWENTY FIVE agonizing years, this is the man playing with your feelings?

The man who would rather let you make fun of him than see you upset?

Stolas : I'M SORRY NEVERMIND , IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL. I WAS JUST WORRIED ABOUT YOU. YOU SEEMED VERY UPSET AND YOU TOOK OFF SO FAST. BUT MAYBE I READ TOO MUCH INTO THAT. I'M GLAD IF THAT'S NOT THE CASE. I WASN'T UPSET EITHER I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE YOU WERENT'T AND OBVIOUSLY YOU CAN HANDEL ANY STUPID JOKE A CLOWN CAN MAKE. ASMODEUS CAN BE VERY INVASIVE IN HIS HUMOR. BUT I THOUGHT IT WAS PRETTY FUNNY MYSELF. WHAT HE SAID ABOUT ME AT LEAST. I ENJOY BEING THE SUBJECT OF JEST. MAYBE YOU CAN SAY MEAN THINGS TO ME TOO NEXT TIME YOU COME OVER.

(Credit to SilverBlade67789 on Reddit)

Or is it you that is playing with HIS feelings? Hm?

Calling up HIS line and making him think it was going to be a date, yknow what lemme pull THAT transcript too!

Blitzo: I was wondering if you… wanna come with me to a club tonight?

Stolas: Are you asking me on a date, Blitzy? *blushing and his pupils turn into hearts*

Blitzo: I-yes, I suppose that is what's happening. How fast can you get down to Lust?

You make him think its a date, make him think you're going to treat him to a good night. Now how do you know he would be sooooo willing to come? Well he told you, he loves you, he wanted you for his first time. I mean c'mon you're not completely stupid, Blitzo.

Claim #3: That Stolas Views Blitz as Less Important Than Himself

I will be referring back to my religious symbolism essay for this part so if you haven't had a chance, it's linked.

One of the main things I note about Stolas is during Mastermind is he kneels down to accept the punishment of an imp. He gets on his knees willingly and doesn't ask for special treatment.

In the GIF above, you can see Stolas is on his knees. This is meant to be a symbolic moment where Stolas is humbling himself to be on equal grounds with him by putting aside his wants to prioritize Blitz's needs.

Very similar to Blitz putting himself on the rails during Sinsmas to be on equal ground with Stolas, a moment where neither of them are lowering themselves, but the other is lifting themself up to meet Stolas where he is at.

Stolas does not view himself as better than Blitz, if anything in the Full Moon argument he views himself so much lower than Blitz due to the arrangement they had for so long and how he treated Blitz during it.

But wanna talk about treating someone as less than? Do I even have to pull up the transcript of Blitzo casually pressuring Stolas for sex because he believes that's all he wants? Do I need to pull the GIFS of Stolas looking visibly upset and uncomfortable?

OOPS already did.

Stolas: I'm tired of this. I'm uncomfortable how you're speaking to me now.

Blitzo: Oh, come on, Stolas. You can't tell me this isn't a fantasy of yours. [gets up on the table] You want me to show your rich, prince-y ass what a real fuckin' is. [pulls on Stolas's robe]

Stolas: Stop it! [walks away]

Blitzo: Ha! I'm right, aren't I? [gets off the table] You get off to getting plowed by people you look down on.

Talk about fucking dehumanizing. The man pours his heart out to you because he truly cares about you and- you chalk all that up to sex? To a kink? A fetish? C'mon Blitzo you can't project onto him forever. You can't continuously expect him to take the downfall for YOUR short comings.

Oh! Oh! Let's not forget that Blitz doesn't think Stolas can DIE for like half a season, and therefore is why he felt NO urgency when Striker took him! Despite KNOWING Striker has access to ANGELIC ARTILLERY!

WHAT DO YOU MEAN "he can get hurt?"?! YOU KNEW THAT INSANE POSSUM FUCK HAD ACCESS TO AN ANGELIC RIFLE DUMBASS!

LOOK, LOOK YOUR EMPLOYEE LITERALLY WAS HOLDING IT, SO DON'T BULLSHIT ME THAT YOU DIDN'T KNOW HE COULD GET HURT, OR DIE! CONSIDERING HOW FUCKING UPSET YOU WERE THAT HE WAS GOING TO KILL STOLAS or as you say: "to off my easiest lengthy ticket to Earth behind my back."

Need I go FUCKING on? You don't see that man as a person, and surprisingly he tried to treat you better than you EVER treated him. Talking about some "you think you're better than us", that man has literally been so good to you while you couldn't be bothered to worry while this was happening to him:

Then after that you can't even be bothered to shoot him a text.

All of that SHIT was projection and I will DIE on this hill alone if I have to.

Blitzo : GIT BEVVER SWOON :(

Stolas : THANKS YOU BLITZ, THAT MEANS A LOT.

Stolas : I MIGHT BE HERE A WHILE, IF YOU EVER WANT TO VISIT. ( Heart Emoji )

(Credits to SilverBlade67789 on Reddit)

CAN'T EVEN BE FUCKING BOTHERED!

If anyone views anyone as "less than" it's the fucker consistently dehumanizing, oversexualizing, and objectifying the owl man. Don't bring that shit around here ever again Blitzo.

[End of Tackling Blitz's Claims]

It is all pure projection and bullshit. I will willingly die on this hill by myself, but I'm sorry there is evidence to backup the things I say. I don't go looking for stuff to just tear Blitz down, but it gets to a point when all people do is tear down Stolas that I gotta start yanking the skeletons outta Blitz's closet and throwing the corpses at people, in their faces.

This isn't about Stolas's behavior alone, but Blitz's own complicity in it. Again, who broke into whose home?

4.) Blitz's Poor Communication (Getting Tired of Talking ab this Fuck)

Blitz's inability to communicate properly ain't Stolas's Problem.

I know that may come as a shocker for many of you reading this, but Stolas expressed himself calmly and fairly to Blitz. He didn't insult him or force him to do anything.

However, instead of trying to talk to Stolas or get Stolas to stop he starts YELLING AT HIM!??!?!?!

(MY BABY FLINCHED- I'M GONNA CRY)

Blitz starts yelling at Stolas out of a fear of pure rejection, then proceeds to go off on Stolas while projecting entirely.

He takes no time to choose to be healthy and say: "Wait wait wait! That's not my answer! You can't ask me that and expect an answer, Stolas... I need some time, please?" No, no he proceeds to call him a "royal fuck" and be surprised Stolas wants nothing to do with him or to sleep with him the next episode.

Borderline replicates the same verbal abuse Stolas went through for twenty five years and thinks he should respond well to that? Your inability to communicate is not his problem, bye bitch.

5.) Stolas is Willing to Be Humiliated (Kill Me, I Hate Having to Talk ab This Again)

It makes me physically ill having to drive this point home again. However since no one seems to be willing to let it go, I will stick to my guns and fight this fight. (ALEXA CUE NON-STOP FROM HAMILTON)

The reason I say Stolas is a poor flirt and meant nothing by his comments is because he doesn't understand the social connotations around them. Is that an excuse? No, but he is genuinely sorry. He severed the arrangement and on top of that stopped so many of the behaviors that bothered Blitz.

But I literally bring up text based evidence regarding the fact the man is a victim of abuse who is used to being insulted by his wife because she humiliates him in front of EVERYONE, socially ostracizing him.

He took years and years of abuse and cruelty, this shit is borderline normal to him and he reenacts what he knows, plus mirrors Blitz's behavior to socially fit in. It's why he flirts the way he does. It is all things he learned from environment and from mirroring Blitz.

The worst part that is left out is the fact Stolas would willingly be humiliated if it meant Blitz was happy with him.

"I ENJOY BEING THE SUBJECT OF JEST. MAYBE YOU CAN SAY MEAN THINGS TO ME TOO NEXT TIME YOU COME OVER."

He thinks this shit is normal. He does it to protect himself when he thinks people are upset with him! He'd willingly let Blitz humiliate and dehumanize him if it meant he wasn't mad!

And yeah, it makes me physically ill to talk about this because I know what that's like. Making yourself as meek and pathetic as possible, just so the person you love will maybe, just maybe see you as a person again.

If they don't? Let them blow all their steam and anger out on yourself, even if it destroys you.

Hell, Stolas even let Ozzie off the hook for insulting him and humiliating him; "ASMODEUS CAN BE VERY INVASIVE IN HIS HUMOR. BUT I THOUGHT IT WAS PRETTY FUNNY MYSELF. WHAT HE SAID ABOUT ME AT LEAST."

The man won't defend himself! He will willingly be humiliated!!! He is a horrid flirt and I'm so so so sorry on his behalf but FUCK why can you all not let it the FUCK go!? Please, he is sorry! He didn't give that man the Asmodean Crystal for nothing!

To address your statement: "(and sorry I know now you don't like talking about it. Critics get stuck on it because it feels more important)"

I want to make it clear why I hate talking about this topic and it is literally because almost all of Stolas's behaviors can be explained by him being a victim of abuse.

Yet any bad behaviors he has it is expected he grovel and apologize, but Blitz never apologizes and no one bats a damn eye. Everyone gives Blitz the trauma pass over and over despite the fact that 90% of his trauma is self inflicted.

Stolas's trauma was forced upon him and no one seems to care! No one gives him a break or lets him off the hook and THAT is why I will not back down. It's why I will keep writing essay after essay until my point is made clear.

He is always willing to be humiliated. To be publicly treated like a joke.

He unintentionally perpetuates that hurt to Blitz because Blitz openly insults Stolas and Stolas takes it as flirting. He thought it was mutual.

He made a mistake and misread and incredibly difficult man. Sue him.

Well sue me, since he has no money at the moment. (joke)

Moving on I think I've run out of things to bring up purely because I am- upset and very frustrated because I know this fight and argument is never-ending.

I try to remain civilized, but at some point you get tired.

Amalthea Out.

My Ask Box is Open and I love you all so much! Thank you for your continued support!

If you want to be on my tag list, let me know in my ask box! <3

[brynn-lear]

AUGVHSGGDGH I JUST PLAYED THE DEMO AND IM FLOPPING LIKE A FISH LIKE IM SO EXCITED TO GET ALL THE CHARACTERS?? I got gallagher's thing first (was hit w the tbc) but like ?!??! I soo agree w u he's super underrated but he seems so sweet I did Aventurine's route after and like the sneak peek of the second chap like KJGHGUDIHJG MY SHEYLA SOBS YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME I'll probably do sunday's next orr maybe try getting Ratio's intro if that exists, but for sure loving how it is rn and I can't wait for the updates!! You said you don't get many asks or stuff abt the demo and honestly I get how it feels but I hope u know u r feeding many people's brainrot and huge respect for making a VISUAL NOVEL of all things. Tysm OP <33

Actor!Aventurine: Thank you, anon. I'm flattered that you enjoyed my performance.

Actor!Aventurine: Won't you be there for me next chapter? I'll be waiting for you~

Actor!Ratio: How coquettish.

Actor!Aventurine: Oh, you're just mad your scenes aren't shot yet.

[otome game link here]

HUHUHU THANK YOU 😭😭😭 orz. The only routes available for now is Sunday's and """Aventurine""'s, but I'm super glad you seemed to have enjoyed it!

i was having a blast making aven cause i know what torture i was cooking hehehe 🥰🥰

Idk abtthe "many" people brainrot comment cause (excluding close friends) I can really just count with my hand who played the game and messaged me lol 😭. HOWEVER!!! YOU SENDING AN ASK IS STILL COMFORTING THANK YOU!!!

aND YES I PROMISE GALLAGHER IS 😩💯💯💯💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ UNDERRATED HUSBAND. HE IS SWEET AND KIND AND JUST TIRED DAD VIBES and I'm so sad that there's not a lot of gallagher simps

okay I'll stop my incoherent happy rambling noises-

thank you for the ask anon, may you win your next 50/50s ‼️

[maybequinnidk]

I'm Good At Loving You (You're Good At Loving Me) pt. 2

part 1

(hurt/comfort i think. feedback is appreciated, i'm new to this)

Kara notices after that conversation at the Tower three weeks ago something started to change.

Lena stays over almost everyday, and they develop a domestic routine: sometimes they're lucky enough to spend some more minutes in bed before properly starting the day, just enjoying the other's company. Then they eat breakfast, wash the dishes, sweep the floor, take out the trash. After that they shower and get ready for the rest of their day. They have a late lunch with their team and go back to their respective tasks. By the time she goes back home Lena is usually there, if they didn't go together.

Kara's favorite part is the relief of coming home and finding Lena making dinner, or reading a book on the couch, or coming out of the shower, or- Kara's favorite part is Lena. And today she's...

Not here.

As if today wasn't awful enough already.

She came in through the window and falteringly made her way to the kitchen, leaning over the countertop.

She finds a note on top of it in Lena's handwriting "forgot my phone at the lab, portal watch is still broken :/ BRB "

Not even five minutes later her partner arrives. She barely opens the door and Kara envelopes her in a hug. Lena is quick to reciprocate despite the suddenness.

"Oh. Hi. I came back as fast as I could, are you okay?"

Today was a hectic day. She had to leave early in the morning and missed breakfast, the villain of the week was turning into villain of the month, she'd been running on nothing but a sandwich, a bag of chips and yellow star radiation for the past 12 hours, and to top it all off she solar flared. She used the last bit of her powers to fly home. She didn't break anything and didn't get sick, but still, everything hurts.

She shakes her head.

"Oh, darling. Let's go inside and talk about it?"

Kara doesn't want to talk though. She squeezes Lena tighter. She can do that now.

"Or we could go inside and not talk about it?" Lena knows her so well. "How about we get you out of this suit, and you take a nap while I worry about dinner. Does that sound good, honey?"

Lena knows her so well.

She loves Lena calling her "darling", but "honey" is on another level.

It's for when she's grieving Krypton, her family, her friends, her culture. For when she can't get out of bed after waking up five seperate times in the same night because the memories that come back as nightmares wouldn't give her a break. For when she couldn't save everyone from a fire or earthquake or alien attack. For when she's not even able to process and explain what's happening.

It's been a while since she needed it.

She nods.

She has no idea what time it is when she wakes up, all she knows is that it's cold, Lena is stroking her hair and the softness of her voice can be compared to the one of her hoodie and sweatpants.

"How are you? Did you sleep well, honey?"

Kara yawns and stretches. She does feel a little bit better so she nods.

She does remember what Lena said during dinner. "I talked to Alex and J'onn and they agreed that we all need a break, so Nia suggested a game night sometime soon."

The night's events blur together. She doesn't know if it's because of her exhaustion or the fact that this has happened so many times before — it's mundane, eating with Lena after a hard day.

She also remembers when she was able to voice her thoughts for the first time since she got home.

She had just gone to bed, her face buried in the pillow, as Lena was petting her hair.

"Honey, are you feeling better?"

She nods and turns to her left so she can see Lena. "Thank you for this."

"I'm glad I was able to help."

"You always are."

Kara grabs Lena's other hand and brings it to her lips, peppering her with kisses, maintaining eye contact. She wants to be closer, though.

Lena reads her mind again. She lifts up the blanket as an invitation to get closer, which Kara accepts.

Kara settles her body between Lena's legs and rests her head on her chest. Featherlight fingers caressing her back, the subtle rise and fall of Lena's breathing. It's grounding.

"I love you." she breaks the silence.

> > > × < < <

Kara has said that a lot in the past couple of weeks. Mostly when they're in private, or when she's about to go on field.

She had been so anxious about this. Terrified to trust that Kara wasn't manipulating nor leaving her.

But seeing the way Kara looks at her – like the first time they woke up together, or shared clothes; with an unmistakable fondness in her eyes, a light blush on her face and a smile on her lips – she knows she means it.

Most of the time, Lena responds with physical affection, a soft "I know", a concerned "stay safe", an "ily" text; sometimes she didn't respond at all, still not completely used to it. This is not any of those times.

"I love you too." She barely thinks about it, it's always on her mind. Such a frequent thought it became an easy action. Natural. Familiar. Known.

"I know, baby." Kara plays with the collar of Lena's shirt, traces her neck and jaw.

She never liked being called "baby" by her exes. It was uncomfortable, infantilizing and just felt wrong.

There was only one person who made it tolerable: Jack. But even then he didn't use it all the time. He preferred "darling" and so did she.

The first time Kara used that pet name, it came as a suprise that it didn't bother her. It was two, maybe three weeks into this new aspect of their relationship.

"You're so wonderful, baby, so stunning." Kara could probably listen to her pulse rushing and see her face flushing which only made her blush even more.

In the past she would have said something like "I know you're trying to be cute but I really don't like that word", instead she said nothing because her brain had given up on her.

The reason she likes it so much now is probably because it's always accompanied with compliments and reassurance.

"I'm so proud of you." proud. Lena lets out a short laugh and smiles shyly.

"Darling, you're doing it again..."

"Doing what?"

"Comforting me when you're the one who needs it."

"I told you." she finds a way to get even closer, kisses her cheek and says "It helps."

Although she doesn't fully understands how that works, she does see how it affects Kara when she starts to relax.

> > > × < < <

She eventually falls asleep.

With Lena's hearbeat at the perfect volume on her ears; audible but not overwhelmingly loud.

The words "I love you too" echoing in her mind; can words be addictive?

The hope that tomorrow won't be worse than today; may Rao help her.

She eventually falls asleep.

[gingersnaptaff]

Peredur and Cai, or why I think these two are each other's foils within Peredur ap Efrawg (March Mabinogion Madness 1)

(The opening lines of 'Peredur' from The Red Book of Hergest.)

With thanks to @nekomaidmordred for letting me chew his ear off about this as well as @dullyn and @gwalch-mei for being like 'no, this is good actually.'

Cai and Peredur. You know them, you love them, they are the definition of tol on smol violence within the pages of The Mabinogion. And I'm here to yap at you about the fact they're foils because this idea wouldn't leave me alone.

(I had this idea of the bus, okay? Thank you Cynan Jones' book 'Blood, Bird, Snow' cuz it made it so explicit that it knocked my teeth out.)

For a start, Peredur is consistently kind. For example, when he first comes to Arthur's court he meets the two dwarves that once belonged to his father he is courteous to them. This is in sharp contrast to Cai who treats them poorly and strikes them. This haughtiness of his is arguably what pisses off Peredur the most - but it's also, arguably, Cai's greatest asset and the thing we all know and love about him. He gets so pissed off in 'Culhwch ac Olwen' when Arthur sings his dumbass englyn that he ups and leaves and that's the last we hear from him.

Furthermore, they can also be contrasted with how they battle. Cai is, perhaps, far more rash in how he deals with Peredur whereas Peredur has some level of cunning. This hot-headedness of Cai's results in his unknown assailant (Obvs Peredur, but Cai doesn't recognise him) giving him a broken arm and, I'm certain of this, Arthur despairing at one of his greatest warriors' antics. I am gonna go out on a limb and say this could be an allegory for a formerly Welsh figure (Cai) being used as a stand-in for colonialism, considering he has taken on much more of his French romance role as a gruff, boorish knight, while Peredur is the oppressed Welsh but I will not be kicking that particular hornet's nest today.

Cai is a sulky, sulky bastard and it shows after Peredur breaks his arm. 'And Cai sulked and spoke angry, jealous words. "Gwalchmai," he said, "I am certain you would lead him [Peredur] back by his reins. However little praise and honour will you get from overcoming the exhausted Knight,'"' But, in some way, it's kinda cute. Plus, I'd say both Cai and Peredur are loved by Arthur and Gwalchmai respectively and are treated kindly by them. Both are taken to their bestie's pavilions either after they're injured (Cai) or once they've made their identity known (Peredur.) Furthermore, in sharp contrast to his ribbing of him in 'Culhwch ac Olwen,' Arthur here is genuinely worried for Cai and is 'sorry for the pain Cai had received for he loved him greatly.' Meanwhile, Gwalchmai treats Peredur with respect, as does Owain, when the trio first meet in the woods before Peredur becomes a Knight, and, thereafter, throughout the tale whenever they cross paths. Plus, it's interesting that Peredur is seen as the 'flower of chivalry' or, at least, the Welsh version of it in sharp contrast to Cai. He'd been postponed as perhaps the central antagonist or the one who holds the most memorable scene. He's a gadfly to Peredur and the dwarves. Churlish, contemptuous, and contumelious all in one, that's our Cai.

But this isn't to say that Cai is evil or is disrespected. Arthur cares greatly about him. Nobody ever says Cai is vindictive within the text or elsewhere. He is, presumably, Arthur's distain - a steward, arguably one with the powers of a modern-day Prime Minister - within the text of Peredur, and therefore it's his job to run the court. Once Peredur arrives at Arthur's court he feels he must turn him away for '[his] weapons are untidy' and he doesn't want Arthur's court to be brought in disrepute. As well as this, you must take into account how highly regarded hospitality was amongst the Welsh when talking about Cai's actions towards the dwarves. Gerald of Wales writes in his 'Journey Through Wales': 'They [The Welsh] consider liberality and hospitality among the first virtues' and that 'so much does hospitality rejoice in communication' that it makes sense as to why Cai gives the dwarves a 'clout on the ear' after they've spoken to Peredur. They've flouted the rules of hospitality and Arthur's court by 'staying dumb for a year.' Welsh culture was built on conversation - as are many other cultures, including other Celtic ones - and to remain silent at a lord's table, particularly one who has sheltered you, as Arthur has to the dwarves, was seen as a great offence. We can extrapolate that this follows a throughline in The Mabinogion where hospitality is either broken - Pwyll's dogs slaying the stag Arawn's hounds had chased, Efnisien's butchery of Matholwch's horses, Pwyll and Rhiannon's badger-in-the sack game with Gwawl in Branch 1 being the impetus for Llwyd's magic desolation of Dyfed in Branch 3, or Gwydion's whole deal with stealing Pryderi's pigs in Branch four and Blodeuwedd's hosting of Gronw Pebyr at her husband's court leading to them murdering him - or restored in some way (Branch giving Matholwch the Cauldron of Rebirth in recompense for Efnisien, Manawydan threatening to hang Llwyd's wife who has shapeshifted into a mouse, Pwyll defeating Hafgan in Arawn's form, Lleu ultimately slaying Gronw and Gwydion turning Blodeuwedd into an owl).

Personally, I find it incredibly intriguing how it's Cai Peredur faces off against considering Cai was seen as the ideal of Wslsh warriorhood before Peredur. In 'Culhwch ac Olwen' much is made of Cai's prowess in battle and powers, as well as his lineage. He hails from 'Y Hen Ogledd' or 'The Old North.'

It's Yorkshire (Elmet), Northern England, and the Scottish Lowlands. Y Hen Ogledd is where Y Gododdin is situated and where Rheged - and Owain and Urien - hail from. It's seen as being an extension of Wales essentially, for they considered themselves to be the same and they spoke Brittonic. Both were even referred to as Cymry or 'fellow-countrymen.'

Anyways, I'm bringing this up because Peredur's lineage is connected to there. His father, Efrawg's, name is literally York which connects him to Elmet. Plus, he dies in battle which connects him to Y Goddoddin/The Battle of Catraeth of which Anierin writes 'Men went to Catraeth at morn/Their high spirits lessened their life-span.' Furthermore, another Arthurian hero, Cynon ap Clydno, was reputed to've fought at Catraeth and perished there. (Cynon was lord of Eidyn or modern-day Edinburgh.) Also, let us not forget Peredur's namesake, Peredur ap Eliffer was legit first cousins with Urien Rheged.

Cai, meanwhile, is connected to the princes/kings of Dyfed through his dad, Cynyr Ceinfargog (forkbeard). Cynyr was the father of Saint Non who was the patron saint of both rated women and Pelynt, a village in Cornwall. She's also the mother of Dewi Sant, otherwise known as St. David, Wales' patron saint! Cai would be Saint David's UNCLE. Through these lineages, both Peredur and Cai would be connected to an age of great deeds, which would further heighten their, y'know, whole Greatest Warrior Lads In Wales vibe.

Finally, both are later downgraded within the corpus of stories that came after or even at the same time. (Percival's treatment in Chretien stands out and then he's later bodied by Galahad out of his position as Finder of Big Holy Cup, whereas Cai is arguably superseded by Gwalchmai and thereafter Gawain as Arthuriana's Best Boi.)

Anyways, that's my ramble. That's it. Since Saint David's Day is March 1st, I want u all to think about Cai and him being a proud uncle to his nephew. Or Peredur breaking Cai's arm. Whatever floats your boat.

[floweycidal]

hey op i know youre insane over flowey so i thought id share my brain with you

have we considered the chara parallels in undertale yellows neutral run? as in. how flowey is pissed that midway through the plan clover went back on it? how flowey probably said something that chara said in the moment frustrated? im ill.

HEY OP I KNOW YOU’RE INSANE OVER FLOWEY HAHAHA INSANE START /SILLY

ah, yes, yes! you've come to the right place. please, make yourself at home. i’ll handle your brain with the utmost care.

OUDHUHGH YUUUP, we've (me, myself, and i) absolutely considered all that. and more!

but see, i personally never thought that was all there is to it. it would’ve been far too facile, much too pat, to assume chara had just... snapped at him in their final moments. that they’d cursed his name, branded him a traitor, made their hatred crystal clear.

oh, how delightfully clean that would’ve been for him. because then he’d get his closure, wouldn’t he? an answer, wrapped up all pretty just for him.

"i betrayed them. they loathed me for it. the end."

HA! too polished for my liking. no thanks. closure is reserved for those who can find resolution. and flowey, my son who's got everything wrong with him, has never been one to receive that kind of accord. he doesn't get straightforward, not then, not now, not ever.

in my head, flowey woke up in that garden with gaping holes in his memory of the incident. not total oblivion—never that generous. instead, it was bits and pieces. just enough to know. enough to understand that it was his fault. his frailty. his failure that brought him to this point.

but chara's last moments? their final utterance? those are lost to him. gone. TORN.

he never gets that confirmation. or, more precisely… he doesn’t remember. can’t remember. mwhahaha…

what does spring to mind, however, is the terror. the detestation that wracked their shared body. the oppressive shame that pervaded every step he didn't take. 

but then... at the time... who was feeling what exactly? who blazed with fury, and who broke beneath it? did someone beg? did someone weep? was it him? was it chara? who was hating whom in those parting moments? the harder he tries to remember, the further it slips away.

and because flowey's never met a void he didn’t try to fill, he does what he’s always excelled at. he patches the blanks. projects, narrates. 

his guilt demands a story, and so he obliges. in his version, every foul emotion, every drop of vitriol, was aimed squarely at him. how could it not have been?

chara MUST have surely thought he was an idiot. a weak, cowardly, sniveling idiot. a pathetic creature who couldn’t even get one plan right. couldn’t even die properly!

the self-blame constricts him like a vice, and with every reset, the narrative grows more discordant. he doesn’t just wonder if chara felt let down, he KNOWS they did. feels "their" revulsion rooted in his stem, their disappointment rotting his petals from the inside out with every cycle.

when clover comes along, he's elated. this is his shot at a fresh start. a second chance. the perfect subject for redemption, for forgiveness by proxy. his very own moment to fix everything, to prove that he’s changed. gone were the days when any plan was doomed with him around. this time, he was going to make it work. are you looking, chara?

but when clover hesitates... wavers the way he once did... flowey FREAKS.

he doesn’t see clover anymore. he sees HIM. he doesn’t hear his own voice, either. he hears the chara he’s created. the version that exists only in the cruel theater of his own mind. the variation that would never absolve him. that would never understand. that would only revile him.

the words he chucks at clover are the same accusations he believes chara would have spat at him, the same venom he’s already used to poison himself.

the words fall into insignificance, though, because much like the first time, the plan fell apart regardless of whether he condemned asriel clover or not.

all he was left with now was his certainty. chara HATED him.

and they were right to.

[hayaku14]

me every time one percent inspiration, ninety-nine percent perspiration updates and gives us another banger kaishin au:

[m1ckeyb3rry]

i will probably never make my account purely MDNI because i only really write sfw work and like i remember being a minor in fandom ik it can be hard to find sfw fics!! but in exchange for that if you are a minor following me please block the mdni tag and let me be an adult in peace every now and again 😭

[softquietsteadylove]

I need the goalie AU again. Please. I beg of you to please write thena being all shy and embarrassed when hanging out together and Gil thinking it’s adorable. I CANT BELIEVE I FORGIT ABT THIS AU LIKE THAT MAN 😭💀

Thena made her third - slow - loop around the rink, mixed in with everyone else attending the free skating time available to the community. It felt bizarre, skating freely. She was in a regular old sweater and skirt with fleece lined tights on. She wasn't here to practice her axle or turns.

She was here for a...to...with...Gil was meeting her.

It wasn't them crossing paths before or after practice, no matter how planned. Since Gil had shown up regardless of his own schedule, they had both come to do so more often. They even texted, now.

Thena had given up her aversion to phones just for the occasion. Ajak had questioned what made her want one all of a sudden, but Thena had offered the pathetic but perfectly believable excuse that it was just time for her. And she could text with Makkari and Druig, now.

To her mother's credit, she had accepted the excuse and taken her to the mall that very same day.

Hey, there's a free skate this saturday. We don't have practice that day. Wanna go just for funsies? :)

It was a completely charming and adorable invitation, from the wording to the little smile he added to it. Thena had already read it over so many times she was quite sure it qualified as obsession by this point. If anything, she was lucky the phone only noted when it was read for the first time, and not every subsequent time she had gazed at it just to hear Gil's voice in her head.

"Thena!"

Her heart leapt in her chest. Sometimes she felt so conscious of it she wondered if the rink speakers were blaring it for all to hear instead of a grainy old pop song. But she waved.

Gil skated right over to her. He had powerful strides, making it across the rink in no time, although he made sure to come to a stop in a way that didn't shower her skates with the debris of his gliding. "I'm glad you could make it."

She just smiled, tucking some hair behind her ear as they started skating lazily around with everyone else. "I've never come here just for 'funsies', as you put it."

He beamed at her. "Well, maybe this'll be the first of many."

It was somewhat of an open ended invitation; not so direct as to put pressure on her but certainly they both knew the implication. She looked down at the scratched up ice beneath their skates. "Maybe."

"Did your mom like the cupcakes?" Gil asked, a far better conversationalist than she (thank goodness).

"She did!" Thena jumped at the opportunity to talk about something that didn't make her quite so nervous. "She said she was quite impressed."

"Ah," Gil shrugged, blushing with modesty as he pushed his hands into his hoodie pockets. He was just wearing a t-shirt under it, but she supposed boys always seemed to dress too light in cold conditions. "It's just a simple recipe. But I'm glad you liked 'em."

They were the single most delicious thing she had ever eaten.

"I'll return your container next practice," she promised more quietly. There was no easy way to admit that she hadn't actually told her mother she was coming today to meet Gil specifically.

All she had told her mother was that she was meeting 'some friends'. She didn't want Ajak getting any...ideas.

"No worries," he grinned at her. Gil had a real grace to him on the ice, moving easily, but matching her pace in a way that required some control over his full abilities. "Your dad seems to be less of a jerk, lately."

Thena pressed her lips together. Her father/coach had indeed been less abrasive for several of her practices. Specifically, after he had asked her if she knew why a certain young man was always lingering. "I believe I have you to thank for that, actually."

"Me?" Gil blinked, and so innocently at that.

Thena rolled her eyes. "Father may be a bit of a beast at times, but he has a reputation of decency to uphold. He can't have strangers thinking he's unprofessional."

Gil nodded, considering the words. But he looked at her with a softer expression than before, "I'll be at every one of them, then."

She felt an increasingly familiar tingle in her cheeks and rushed to correct him. "Th-That's okay, Gil! I don't mean--there's no need, really."

He gave her a doubtful little pout.

She smiled at him as they rounded the loop again. "Your presence, no matter how long it's there, is enough of a deterrent. And its protection is appreciated, believe me."

As soon as she said it, she wondered if she should have. Did she sound weird? Was she making too big a deal out of it?

But he seemed unaware of her worry. That soft expression he had remained, and he even let his arm brush hers a little, as much as their skates would allow the proximity, at least. "Well, uh, good. I'm glad I could protect you, then, I guess."

They both looked away. Thena swallowed, although even that sounded too loud in her ears at the moment. The rink was cold but her face felt warm.

Gil cleared his throat. "Uh, I..."

"Do you come to the free skate often?" Thena blurted out, before she could think better of it. She hoped she hadn't cut him off from anything important.

She just wanted to keep talking to him.

"Uh, I used to," Gil managed, even pulling one of his hands out of his pockets to fiddle with the zip of his hoodie. "Skating was always fun to me, I guess. That's how I got into hockey."

She looked at him. "Not as easy to find time for it now that you're on the team, I suppose."

He looked at her, too, knowing she knew just how true that was for the both of them. "I guess, yeah. To be honest, I liked skating, but it wasn't really my idea to join."

"Whose was it?" she tilted her head, although turning the corners again made her have to keep her hair out of her face.

"Ikaris has been on the team forever," Gil shrugged. "And he kind of convinced me to try it just 'cause I'm big. And everyone told me what a good goalie I was after, so I guess I kind of just-"

"Went with it?" she suggested, and he affirmed it for her.

"I mean, I like it," he shrugged. "But it's nice to come here just to skate. I kinda forgot what it felt like."

"Me too," she sighed, looking at the faded colours buried beneath the ice, seeing the fog of her breath and feeling the breeze through her hair. Her ankles weren't burning, her knees didn't ache. It was fun.

"I guess I should come here more often too, huh?" Gil suggested lightly, and then became sheepish again.

Thena looked down at her hands clasping together. Gil had taken the first leap, not only inviting her today but also suggesting further occasions for it in the future. It was time for her to take a leap. "We could make a habit of it."

He looked at her, his curiosity piqued.

"So we can keep in mind that we like skating," she added, rather lamely, in her opinion. But to suggest that they make a regular habit out of coming here together just for the joy of each other's company--it felt a little too much, at least for now. "Outside of practice, that is."

"Yeah," he smiled at her, his usual charm emerging again. "I like the sound of that."

Again, the invitation was a good enough idea, but open enough so as not to need a full commitment this very moment.

"Hm," Thena squeaked out. She was letting the conversation roll straight into the ditch again. But Gil really had a terrible ability to push all of her thinking power out of her head just by being near her.

"Uh, speaking of things we like just for fun...?"

Thena looked at Gil, who had the same nervous but also assured smile he'd had when he first admitted he wanted to spend time with her regardless of practice schedules.

"I was gonna try a new cupcake recipe next weekend," he admitted to her more quietly. He pulled his hands out of his pockets for it. He had no need for even the light gloves she was wearing. She could see a plain leather cuff around his wrist. He looked cool with it on. "Would you wanna...come over?"

"And bake?" she blinked. She was extremely capable of consuming the results of baking. But that didn't mean she would be able to produce anything. "With you?"

"Yeah," he suggested lightly. "You could help me test it out."

Thena just stared at him, her mouth hanging open. She felt like an idiot, but she couldn't squeak out a single word. All she could think about was what it would be like to be with Gil, in his element, baking wit him, in his home.

And as much as skating for fun seemed like a hang out kind of activity, baking with him certainly seemed more in the 'date' realm.

"Thena!"

Her head was turned for too long and she hadn't realised she was drifting directly into the path of those trying to get on and off the ice. She tried to stop, but her picks were angled wrong, making her stumble.

"Whoa!"

Gil caught her before she could fall. And as much as she was happy not to tumble flat on her face - or behind - in front of him, she wasn't sure what to make of this, either.

Thena stared at him. His hand was on her back, having caught her waist in the bend of his elbow. She knew he was big, and she knew his arms were strong, but she could never have known how true those things were until now. And he was so warm. Even with his hoodie hanging open and just a t-shirt, she could feel his warmth radiating from him.

It went through his t-shirt like nothing. And her waist was now pulled right against his. Her light sweater felt like tissue paper. Her hands were grasping onto him through sheer reflex. One had a handful of his hoodie, then other had his shirt in its grips. She looked down. The bottom of it came up, revealing just a little of Gil's beautiful skin and the top of his jeans.

"Sorry!" Thena flailed to release him from her clutches. As if the near fall weren't mortifying enough, now she was pawing at him. If her face was warm before, it was positively on fire, now.

"That's okay," Gil said gently, not even a chuckle at her embarrassing display. "Are you? You're not hurt, are you?"

He was so sweet. It made her insides feel like she was in a perpetual axle spin, twirling and twirling and rushing with joy. And she could only hope she would stick the landing.

Gil let her smooth her own fluster. He stood stationary on the ice as she ran a hand over her hair, tugged at her skirt.

"Sorry," she repeated (needlessly).

"I don't mind," Gil said just as quietly. He was so sweet--so perfect.

She tapped her picks on the ice and looked up at the rink clock. She looked at him and forced a smile, "thanks."

"Do you wanna sit for a minute?" he asked, gesturing vaguely to the stands.

She looked at Gil. She could use the excuse not to look at him, collect her nerves. But she didn't want to only be nerves around him. She wanted to skate with him more, ask him more about hockey. And she wanted to learn how to make cupcakes from him.

"No."

Gil looked down at as she reached for his hand of her own volition. She had her gloves on and he didn't, but his touch was soft. Their eyes met and he blushed, "o-okay."

She started skating again, slowly, and he followed her naturally. Face aflame or not, she cleared her throat, determined to get their conversation out of the ditch. "Tell me about this new recipe we'll be making."

Gil's face lit up, and she had to look away again. But she kept his hand in hers as they resumed their looping. He pushed himself to be next to her, stride in stride, hand in hand. "Well, I found a recipe for a chocolate and vanilla swirl. I've never tried two flavours in one before, so I thought it might be cool."

They made the very best combination, Thena thought. She smiled at him, "so, what will we need for the recipe?"

[crazy-fangirl2524]

So for people worried about potential renee and Jean, you can rest assure. These are in the tags of a recent post on tumblr so it is new news so.

Also, once again please don’t bully nora offline again I swear to god. And I love jerejean like the sun but we have to respect nora and her books and characters. I don’t want Nora to write this book as a fan service. I want her to write whatever she wants and she see fits for her beloved characters and world.

Nora maybe you are doing this for us, for yourself for Jean. But we trust you and cannot wait to read the books.

[justafriend-ql]

Are you longing for someone? NEVER LET ME GO Episode 12

[monkee-mobile]

Do you think Davybaby ever regressed before meeting/joining the Monkees? Either in England or after moving to America

And if so how do you think he dealt with it?

I feel like he did but to a different level. he probably never really OFFICIALLY regressed and was really of seen as a little one during it until he came to the states, but when he was particularly stressed out while still in england he’d often go into a kind of weak state if his defenses were really down, he just didn’t process it through really regressing like he would later on. in england, he’d try his absolute hardest not to have that happen. he’d just feel really small and vulnerable and had no one there to protect him or help him through it except his sisters, but they didn’t jump right to babying him, they’d more just help him through the panic attack part of it all. usually he’d just lock himself in his room if he couldn’t brave through it and curl in on himself and sob until he fell asleep (poor thing). he’d often start sucking his thumb, but he just took that as a “weak” behavior that was just coming back from his childhood. He’d also often go pretty nonverbal for a while afterwards but he’d push through it all and move on (which definitely wasn’t the best for him, but it got him through that time. poor little guy didn’t face his own emotions at all). this kind of shutdown didn’t happen all that often cause davy worked hard to build a tough shell and braved it through all the way to when he moved to america and got out of the pressures of his family.

the move really did break him down because suddenly he was alone in a strange country so when the boys first met him he was definitely flighty and not the suave kind of guy he got to be once he became more comfortable, but they were all new to each other so davy didn’t really have a chance to feel super safe to just let himself feel things so he kept up the hard exterior he had built at first. but of course the monkees became very comfortable with each other and basically climb all over each other at all moments so davy started going “feral toddler mode” a lot where he would just go all silly and giggly and playful, so his comfort came through in a relatively childlike way, but he didn’t panic regress until a while after the guys were a group.

but eventually it happens and davy breaks down really hard at some point. it’s the boys who really start babying him when it happens. in the past he didn’t have anyone to really take care of him but things kind of clicked when he was held and talked to softly and he just sunk into the love that was given to him and it helped him process everything anew.