#Now I’m watching ashes season 2 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dianawinchester03 · 9 days ago

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Season 2, Episode 22 - All Hell Breaks Loose: Part 2

Series Masterlist

Author’s Note: Hi beauties! Quick disclaimer, a lot of the scenes in this episode have songs that inspired it. Soooo, I’ll interrupt for a few seconds every now and then to tell you. Thank you for reading!

The first song inspo is Let The World Burn by Chris Grey:)

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Third Person POV

Y/N’s cold lifeless body laid on the old mattress, her head lolled to the side, her features relaxed. Dean leaned on the door framed, a distant and heartbroken expression coated his face as Sam and Jo sat by the bedside. Sam was still in hysterics, the guilt of her death weighing on his chest.

Losing Y/N was one thing, but losing her to a knife that was meant for him. It was heart wrenching for Sam Winchester. He remembered the day she came to him about the dream she had and he told her not to worry about it. They summed it up to the stress of the job. God he felt stupid.

Jo was trying to console a guilt and grief-laden Sam, but she wasn’t far behind. First losing Ash, not having any idea where her mom could be since they didn’t find her body in the rubble and now losing Y/N right in front of their eyes?

Dean was quiet, standing with his arms crossed against the door frame. He felt numb. He couldn't even bring himself to cry. The pain was too intense, too overwhelming. He just stood there in silence, watching as Sam and Jo tried to comfort each other.

‘I shouldn't have fallen in love’

‘Look what it made me become’

‘I let you get too close’

Sam's tears kept falling as he sat next to Y/N. He couldn't bear the weight of the guilt and the grief. He felt responsible for her death, like he should have done something, anything to stop it.

Dean couldn't bear to look at her lifeless body anymore. He had to look away, the sight of her cold, pale skin was too much for him to bear. He stood silently outside the door, watching as Sam and Jo sat by her bedside.

Dean knew that Sam was going through guilt, he could see it in his brother's face. But Dean couldn't bring himself to offer any comfort. He was too lost in his own guilt and grief to even think of comforting his brother.

“Kids?” Bobby’s voice echoed through the house as the door opened. None of them answered, Jo just continued to rub Sam’s back as his sobs lessened, wiping away her own tears. “I brought you this back,” Bobby told them, holding up two bags with food boxes.

“No, thanks, I’m fine” Dean muttered in a deadpan tone. “Y’all should eat something,” Bobby insisted. Jo and Sam didn't respond either, they all just sat in silence, lost in their own thoughts. Sam’s sobs reduced to soft sniffles as Jo comforted him, her own tears continuing to fall silently.

Dean clenched his jaw, keeping his gaze on the ground. “We’re fine, Bobby,” Jo assured him softly. Dean padded over to the table, picking up the whiskey before taking a large swig of it. They were out of earshot from Sam and Jo. Bobby watched as Dean downed the whiskey, his eyes fixed on the younger man's face.

He could sense the pain and grief etched on his features. He knew Dean was struggling, dealing with the loss of Y/N in his own way. Bobby looked at him, his expression sympathetic. He could tell that Dean was hurting. It was painfully obvious how much he loved her. "Dean..." Bobby began, his voice gentle yet firm.

“I hate to bring this up. I really do. But don’t you think maybe it’s time…we bury Y/N” Bobby said quietly. Dean's head slowly moved up, his eyes burning with anger and pain, but at the same time, we looked dead in the eyes. "No," he huffed. "Absolutely not." His hand tightened on the bottle of whisky, resisting the urge to throw it against the wall.

Bobby's eyes narrowed, understanding the grief and anger that drove Dean's response. “Dean, you can’t keep her here forever,” he said firmly, his voice gentle but steady.

The room fell silent as the weight of Bobby's words hung in the air. It was a harsh reality, one that Dean didn't want to face. Sam heard a murmur of their conversation, telling Jo he’ll be right back before placing a kiss on her hand and stepping out of the room.

“Bobby’s right, Dean” Sam sniffled, his eyes puffy and red. Dean clenched his jaw tighter. He knew Sam and Bobby were right, but he couldn't bring himself to let go. The thought of burying Y/N, saying goodbye forever, was unbearable. "I'm not burying her," he growled, his knuckles turning white from his tight grip on the whisky bottle. "Not happening."

Jo stepped out of the room, “Well maybe we can-” She started to suggest, her voice groggy. “What? Torch her corpse?” Dean snapped, sitting on one of the old chairs before taking another swig of the whiskey. Sam and Jo were taken aback by Dean's harsh tone. They understood that he was grieving, but his words were like a punch to the gut.

“That’s not what she would want, Dean,” Jo said quietly, her voice shaking slightly. Dean let out a bitter laugh. “You think you know what she would want? You think anyone knows what she would want?” He stood up from the chair, pacing around the room like a caged animal.

Jo gritted her teeth, “She was my friend too!” She shouted back, pointing to herself, her voice cracking. “No, she was family!” Dean retorted loudly, his voice echoing through the room. "She wasn't just some friend! She was my.." His throat felt like it was closing up, his voice stuck. He couldn't say the word.

Tears welled up in his eyes, despite his best efforts to hold them back. He clenched his fists, hating that he was showing weakness. Dean turned away from Sam and Jo, unable to look at their sympathetic expressions any longer. “She had a vision” Sam muttered as he leaned against the table.

Sam's words made Dean stop pacing, his head snapping towards him. "What did you say?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Sam took in a shaky breath, "She had a vision, well- a dream. She- she saw me get killed months ago. We talked about it and we decided it was a dream because it wasn’t clear and we were all stressed. I think she had the same vision last night….before she..." Sam’s words got caught in his throat.

Dean’s heart dropped, the realization hitting him like a ton of bricks. He clenched his jaw, his mind racing as he tried to make sense of it all. Sam was right. Y/N had a vision and she sacrificed herself for him. “She took the hit for me” Sam chuckled dryly, his heart aching in his chest.

Dean's eyes softened, a mix of guilt and sadness overcoming him. He knew that Sam was beating himself up for Y/N taking the fall for him. The weight of the guilt seemed to be crushing Sam.

"It’s not your fault" Dean said quietly, his voice thick with raw emotion. He didn’t want Sam to blame himself for this. He knew Y/N would never want that. Dean thought for a moment before fishing his keys out of his pocket, tossing it over to Jo.

Jo caught the keys in her hand, looking at him with a puzzled expression. "What are these for?" she asked, her voice shaking slightly. Dean didn’t look at her, his eyes still focused on the ground. "Take Baby. Just go” Dean said firmly. He had made up his mind on what he wanted to do.

"Where are you going?" Bobby asked, his eyes narrowing. He knew that look in Dean's eyes. He knew that whatever idea that was forming in his head was dangerous and ill-considered. “Nowhere. Sam, Jo. Go.” He gritted his teeth, pointing at the door.

"We’re not going anywhere without you," Bobby stepped in firmly, his arms crossed over his chest. “Would you guys cut me some slack?!” Dean bursted out in rage. “We just don’t think you should be alone, that’s all” Bobby shot back. Dean glared at him, shooting Sam a warning look that said, ‘Go, now. I’m serious’

‘Fear in their eyes’

‘Ash raining from the blood orange sky’

‘I let everybody know that you're mine’

‘Now it's just a matter of time’

Sam understood the look Dean gave him. He sighed, his shoulders sagged in defeat. He knew how stubborn his brother could be. He gave Jo a pleading look, silently communicating to her. Jo’s expression was conflicted, she wanted to stay, to fight for Dean, but she also knew that there were some battles that Dean needed to fight alone.

Jo nodded obediently, sighing heavily. She stuffed Dean’s keys into her pocket, taking Sam’s hand into hers to lead him back to the room where Y/N’s body laid. She wanted to say one last goodbye.

Sam and Jo walked silently back to the room where y/n’s body lay on the bed. Sam's expression was one of despair as they approached the bed. He looked down at her lifeless form, the weight of his guilt pressing heavily on his chest.

Jo laid a gentle hand on his shoulder, giving him a sad smile. "Say your goodbye" she whispered softly. Sam nodded, taking a deep breath. He took a step closer to the bed, his eyes filled with tears. He laid a trembling hand on Y/N's cold cheek, his heart aching in his chest.

"I’m sorry," he whispered, his voice shaky. "You didn’t deserve this. I should have listened to your dream, and I’m so sorry." He bent down, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. Jo stood silently at the bedside, her own tears streaming down her face.

She watched as Sam said his goodbyes, the pain of the moment palpable in the room. As Sam stepped back, Jo stepped forward, laying a hand on Y/N's cold arm. "I’ll miss you, slut" she whispered, a sad smile on her face. "You were a hell of a woman."

She leaned down, tenderly kissing Y/N’s forehead as Sam had done before. “Tell mom and Ash hi for me. Thanks for letting me know what it’s like to have a sister” Jo’s voice broke. She had lost all hope of her mom being alive, and it tore her apart. It took God power for the huntress to keep it together.

Jo opted for Sam to walk out first, placing her hand at the small of his back. Sam glanced over his shoulder at the dingy old bed where she laid one last time, “See you on the flip side, crackhead” and with that they left Y/N behind, her cold lifeless body motionless on the bed.

After Jo and Sam left, Dean was still sitting on the chair. His eyes shooting straight at the bed Y/N was on. Bobby was still with him, “Dean..” Dean's eyes didn't leave the bed. He clenched his fists, his jaw tightening. The silence in the room was deafening. He knew that Bobby was trying to talk to him, trying to make him see reason, but he didn’t want to hear it.

“I gotta admit. I could use your help” Bobby confessed. Dean scoffed, rolling his eyes as he took a swig of his whiskey again. “Something big is going down. End of the world big” Bobby pressed. “Well, THEN LET IT END!!l Dean bellowed, his head snapping up to face Bobby.

‘I'd let the world burn’

‘Let the world burn for you’

‘This is how it always had to end’

‘If I can't have you then no one can’

‘I'd let it burn’

‘I'd let the world burn’

‘Just to hear you calling out my name’

‘Watching it all go down in flames’

Bobby's eyes widened in surprise at Dean's outburst, but he quickly recovered, his expression turning stern again. "You don’t mean that," he gasped. Dean's jaw ticked, his grip on the bottle of whiskey tightening. He pushed himself up from the chair in an instant, going toe to toe with the veteran hunter.

“You don’t think so? Huh? You don’t think I’ve given enough?….You don’t think I’ve paid enough?” With his last statement, he nodded his head towards the bed Y/N laid on. Bobby's face softened as he saw the pain and anger etched on Dean’s face. He knew that he wasn’t just talking about the apocalypse, but also about Y/N.

“I’m done with it. All of it. Now, if you know what’s good for you, turn around and get the hell out of here” Dean’s breathing was heavy, his chest heaving with anger. He was done with all the fighting, the pain, the loss. He just wanted it to end, one way or another. Bobby stood his ground, not backing away. So Dean shoved the elder Hunter harshly, “GO!!!”

Bobby stumbled a bit, taken aback by Dean’s sudden aggression. Heartbreak was written all over Bobby’s face, Dean instantly felt guilty. At the back of his mind, he could feel the ghost of a tap at the back of his head that Y/N would give him for his actions just a few seconds ago.

“I’m sorry” Dean apologized but he didn’t take his words back. He was too angry, too distraught. He didn’t want to feel anything anymore, he wanted to be left alone. Bobby stayed quiet, unsure of what to do or say further. His head spun as he took up the bottle again,

“I’m sorry” Dean’s tone dropped, coming out almost like a whimper. “Please just go” He begged as he gripped the chair for balance. Bobby watched for a moment, his heart aching. He knew that Dean was hurting, that he was struggling to process what happened. But he also knew that Dean was in a dark place and that being alone was not the best thing for him.

But Bobby also knew that pushing him would only make things worse. So, with a heavy heart, he turned and walked towards the door, casting one last glance back at Dean, “You know where I’ll be, son.” before stepping out into the night.

Dean's shoulders sagged as soon as the door shut behind Bobby. The room fell into an uncomfortable silence, only the sound of his ragged breathing could be heard. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to shut out the reality of what was happening around him. Y/N was dead.

He opened his eyes again and looked at the bed again, her lifeless body laid on it. A single tear falling from his eye.

A few hours had passed and it was nearing midnight. Dean had almost finished the bottle, checking the time on his watch every few minutes. Getting lost in his own thoughts.

11:54 pm.

He hadn’t taken his eyes off of the bed, his chair now sat in front of Y/N’s side. “You know, when we were little…you and Sam couldn’t have been more than 5…you guys just started asking questions.” A small sad smile broke out on Dean’s face, “How come we didn’t have a mom? How come you didn’t have a mom? We did we always have to move around from safehouse to motel. Where’d our dads go?…They’d take off for days at a time, I remember I begged you”

He took a huge gulp of whiskey, letting the liquid slide down his throat. The burning sensation barely registered as he struggled to keep talking. “Quit asking, princess. Stop talking about it, Sammy. Man, you don’t wanna know” Dean scoffed as he repeated his words as a child to them.

“I just wanted you to be kids. Just for a little while longer. But you weren’t stupid. You had to grow up at such a young age, you never said no when it came to standing up for Sammy in school. Hell- you never said no when it came to kicking our asses in sparring practice” Dean chuckled dryly.

“I remember when F/N hauled my ass from across the country, going batshit crazy looking for you when you ran away. I led the man on a wild goose chase for months” Dean shook his head, “When he finally realized, he told me, ‘I know you’ve been running me around son. And while I don’t appreciate it, I know you’re just doing it because you love and care about my baby.’” Dean repeated F/N’s words to him.

“I was honestly surprised those words came out of the man’s mouth. I was half expecting him to clock me a few until I spilled the beans.” Dean chuckled dryly as he sniffled. “And you…” Dean’s voice cracked, his heart clenching in his chest. He took another gulp of whiskey, trying to drown the lump in his throat.

“You were always there, ever since we were little. Always watching out for us. Saving me from getting my ass kicked by dad and f/n. Keeping Sammy safe. That time you made me clean a whole damn motel floor when I was 16 because I called you something you didn’t like.” He let out a shaky exhale as he remembered the memory. His mind then went back to the night F/N died, a guilt raising in his chest.

“The night your dad died, I yelled and went off on him for not being there when you were electrocuted. And then he ended up getting killed…..it’s been on me ever since because you’ve been so hurt and distant since your dad died…..and you blame yourself meanwhile I’m the one that screamed at him…..I practically put that machete in the vampires hand because it was Sam’s machete she picked up and killed f/n with…..the same one I put down when Luther had his hand around your neck.” Dean choked on his own breath as he confessed to her corpse.

His eyes stung with tears as he continued, guilt and shame filling his heart. He reached out a shaky hand, gently brushing a strand of hair away from her face.

“I know you wouldn’t blame me,” he whispered, his voice quivered. “You never blamed me for anything, even when you had every right too. That’s just how you were.” A tear rolled down his cheek, his hand cupped her cheek.

“I always tried to protect you two. Keep y’all safe. Dad and F/N didn’t even have to tell me. It was just always my responsibility, you know? It’s like I had one job…that one job. And I fucked it up. In the end, you were the one protecting us.” His voice broke and he leaned forward, pressing his hands to the bed. Tears welled up in Dean’s eyes.

“I blew it. And for that I’m sorry.” Dean brought his hand up to wipe his tears away. “I guess that’s what I do. I let down the people I love. I let Dad down. I let F/N down. I let Sammy down. And now, I guess I’m just supposed to let you down too….how can I? How am I supposed to live with that?”

He buried his face in his free hand, the other still cradling her cheek as he sobbed silently. The weight of his failures pressed heavily on his shoulders, the guilt and regret were almost unbearable. He felt like he was drowning, lost in his own torment. “I’m sorry, baby,” he repeated again and again, his voice barely above a whisper. “I’m so damn sorry.”

He stayed like that for a few more minutes, crying silently as he held onto her. The alcohol in him didn’t help, it only made his tears flow more freely. He felt like the lowest scum known to man, and he couldn’t stop blaming himself for everything that happened.

He wanted to scream, to punch something, to do anything to make the pain go away. But he just sat there, his shoulders shaking with the force of his sobs.

“What am I supposed to do?” left his lips in a mournful whisper. “WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?!” He exploded, aiming the bottle of whiskey at the wall. The bottle shattered into pieces, the liquid staining the surface of the wall as it dripped down. It felt good to release some of his anger, but it didn’t fix anything.

He looked back at her, his chest heaving. But there was no comfort in her sight anymore. She was just so goddamn still. She wasn’t supposed to be this still. Not Y/N. She was always full of energy, always laughing and joking.

Dean checked the time on his watch one last time.

12:02 am

His heart shattered, he slowly padded over to the dirty old mattress before taking the golden heart-shaped locket resting on the base of her chest into his fingers, prying it open. The locket opened in his hand, revealing two photos inside. One side held F/N, M/N, John and Mary in their younger days, all standing in-front of Dean’s childhood home in Lawrence.

The other was a picture of the trio as teens, right before Sam left for college. All in their hunting gear, leaning against the Impala, a big smirk on her face and an arm slung around his shoulders, his arm wrapped around her waist, a rare smile on his face. Sam wore a giant grin himself, mainly because Y/N threatened to put Nair in his shampoo again if he didn’t smile for the picture.

His heart sank as he looked at the photos, his fingers trembling as they traced over them. He gently pressed the locket to his forehead, his eyes closing as the memories flooded through him. He could practically hear her laughter in the air, see the sparkle in her eyes as she teased him.

“Happy Birthday, princess,” he whispered. The words choked up in his throat, his hand clutched the locket tightly in his hand.

Author's Note: For more effect, listen to Don’t Blame Me by Taylor Swift when reading this;)

The Harley’s engine roared to life, the sound filled the empty town as Dean snapped on Y/N’s helmet and peeled out from where Jo had parked her. He vaguely remembered passing a crossroads on their way here, he had his mind made up earlier, but he was for certain now.

The cold night air hit his face as the Harley zoomed down the empty roads. His grip on the handle tightened, his mind set on what he was going to do.

‘Something happened for the first time, in’

‘The darkest little paradise’

‘Shakin, pacin', I just need you’

Soon the crossroads came into view and he made the bike halt to a stop, the gravel crunching beneath his boots as he stepped off. He then hurriedly dug into Y/N’s hatchback, taking out all the means necessary to summon a crossroad’s demon.

Luckily, since Y/N was getting more in tune with her psychic side. She had the materials on hand. Unknowing that Dean was gonna do this. He walked over to the middle of the intersection and looked around, the place was still and eerily quiet.

He then knelt down onto the ground, his heart was hammering anxiously in his chest the entire time he worked. The thought of seeing Y/N again pushed him to continue.

‘For you, I would cross the line’

‘I would waste my time’

‘I would lose my mind’

He began to dig into the ground with his hands, stuffing the box in once the hole was big enough before covering it back up with the dirt. Dean stood back up, impatiently waiting as his head swung around in all directions. “All right then, you sons of bitches,” he muttered, his voice wavering. “I know you can hear me.”

“Oh come on already” He muttered, “SHOW YOUR FACE YOU BITCH!!” He bellowed. “Easy, sugar, you’ll wake the neighbors” The sultry voice of a woman said behind him. He whirled around to face the owner of the voice. Sure enough, a figure was standing a few feet behind him. A tall, slender and busty woman with sharp features and a wide smile.

Her eyes flashed red before reverting back to its original brown color. “Dean” The demon smiled widely. “It is so, so good to see you” She smirked, stepping closer to the elder Winchester. “I mean it. Look at you. Gone and got your little girlfriend killed. All alone in the world. Your brother probably hates your guts and wants nothing to do with you…it’s too sweet” The demon verbally tormented him.

He clenched his jaw, the demon’s words stung like a thousand needles. It felt like she was rubbing salt in his open wound and enjoying every second of it. But he wasn’t gonna let her get to him.

She leaned in to whisper in his ear as she circled around him. “Excuse me, you’re gonna have to give me a moment. Sometimes you gotta stop and smell the roses” The demon giggled. “I should send you straight back to hell” Dean growled as he turned his head to face her.

“Oh, you should. But you won’t” The demon pointed out, her tone low and lustful. Dean grimaced in disgust, hating the fact that she was right. “And I know why,” She added, walking around him. “Oh, yeah?” Dean challenged, turning to face her again. “Yeah. Following in daddy’s footsteps. You wanna make a deal” The demon called him out.

He gritted his teeth, his body tensing up as the demon’s words hit all the right chords. The mention of John still stung and left a bitter taste in his mouth.

“Little Y/N/N, back from the dead. And, let me guess, you’re offering up your own soul” She smirked, the sarcasm dripping from her tone. “There are a hundred other demons who’d love to get their hands on it” Dean shot back. The demon chuckled, rolling her eyes. “And it’s all yours. All you gotta do is bring Y/N back. You give me 10 years. Ten years and then you come for me” He knew that he was desperate and the demon knew it too.

“You must be joking” The demon scoffed. “It’s the same deal you give everybody else” Dean snapped, swallowing the lump in his throat. The demon simply tilted her head to the side, raising an eyebrow as if she was looking at something particularly amusing.

“You’re not everybody else” she shot back, stepping closer to whisper in his ear. “Why would I wanna give you anything?” Her breath fanned on the shell of his ear and down his neck. Dean exhaled, trying to keep his temper in check, “Keep your gutter soul, it’s too tarnished anyway” She added with disgust.

Dean clenched his fists, the anger in him was starting to boil up. The thought of seeing Y/N again, of seeing her beautiful eyes or smile again was tearing him apart. He gritted his teeth, taking deep breaths to keep his anger in check “Nine years” he offered.

“No” The demon denied, stepping back. “Eight” Dean shot back. “You keep going, I’ll keep saying no” The demon chuckled sadistically. Frustration was slowly building up in him, he knew this wasn’t going to be easy or pleasant. “Okay, five years. Five years, then my bill comes due. That’s my last offer. Five years or no deal” Dean persisted, his jaw tensing.

The demon smiled, her eyes flashing red for a second. She leaned in as if she was about to kiss him but whispered against his lips, “Then no deal” His heart sank, his final hope being cut short by the demon’s words. He felt a mixture of anger and despair wash over him. Without Y/N, he felt lost, empty, alone. He tried to push down the wave of emotions that threatened to overwhelm him.

“Fine” He whispered, his voice steady despite the turmoil inside him. “Fine” The demon smirked, pulling away before moving around him to walk away. “Make sure you bury Y/N before she starts stinking up the joint” She cackled as she walked away.

The demon’s words stung like a dagger through his heart. Her words were cruel, heartless and aimed to hurt. And they did. But he pushed back the pain, forcing himself to hold it together. “Wait!” he called out to her.

The demon paused in her tracks and turned her head to look at him. “It’s a fire sale and everything must go” She said mockingly. “What do I have to do?” Dean asked, the desperation clear in his tone. The demon rolled her eyes, “First of all, quit groveling. Needy guys are such a turn off.” She snorted, walking back to face him. “Look. Look, I shouldn’t be doing this. I could get in a lot of trouble” She sighed.

“But what can I say? I got a blind spot for you, Dean.” She inhaled through her teeth. “You’re like a puppy, you’re just too fun to play with” The demon sighed deeply, studying Dean’s face. “I’ll do it” She caved. “You’ll bring her back?” Dean gaped. “I will. And because I’m such a saint. I’ll give you one year and only one year” She nodded.

Relief washed over him like a tidal wave. Hearing the demon agree to bring Y/N back lifted a huge weight off his chest. But then the realization of what he had just agreed to sink in. One year. He was essentially handing over his soul to a demon in exchange for Y/N’s life. But he had no choice. He would do anything to get her back.

“But here’s the thing. If you try to welch or weasel your way out, then the deal is off. Y/N drops dead, she’s back to rotten meat in no time. And I’ll take Sammy too, just for good measure” The demon threatened, Dean gulped at her promise. “So, it’s a better deal than your dad ever got. What do you say?” She smirked.

‘Oh Lord, save me, my drug is my baby’

‘I'll be usin' for the rest of my life’

‘Usin' for the rest of my life, ohh-oh’

He exhaled, knowing that he didn’t have a choice. He can’t leave Y/N dead, and not at the cost of Sam’s life too. Even if it would damn his own soul. So with that he snatched the demon roughly from behind her neck, pressing his lips to hers to seal the deal.

‘Don't blame me, love made me crazy’

‘If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right (doin' it right, no)’

‘Lord, save me, my drug is my baby’

‘I'll be usin' for the rest of my life (oh)’

The demon was surprised at first but she quickly pressed herself against him, kissing him back with fervor. It was deep, hungry, and full of desperation on the demon’s side. The deal was completed, sealed with a kiss.

Authors Note: This next scene’s song inspo is Reflections by The Neighborhood (mainly just one line lol)

‘Where have you been?’

‘Do you know when you're coming back?’

Back in the old house, Y/N’s eyes shot open, gasping awake from her ‘deathly nap’. With a grunt she sat up, her eyes searching frantically in the dark room. Her chest heaved as she struggled to catch her breath. The last thing she remembered was telling the boys how much she loved them and everything went black.

She looked around her, disoriented and confused. Where the hell was she? She knew she had gotten stabbed, right in her back, literally. She realized she still had her leather jacket on and quickly peeled it off.

She winced as she tugged on the clothes, trying to not to irritate any possible injury on her back. Once she removed her jacket, she pushed herself off of the dirty old bed and padded over to the mirror on the wall. She then pulled her shirt up to observe the area where she was stabbed.

Her skin was no longer wounded but smooth and unmarred. Her finger traced where her anti possession tattoo layed. Her eyes widened in disbelief as she ran her fingers over the spot where the knife had pierced her. There was nothing. No scratch, no cut, not even a scar. Nothing but a red mark that seemed to be forming into a giant bruise.

The sound of the door opening made her ears perk up. Y/N slowly let her shirt fall back down to cover her stomach as the door was pushed open. She turned to see who was standing in the doorway.

‘We were too close to the stars’

‘I never knew somebody like you, somebody’

Her heart skipped several beats as she saw him standing in the doorway. The deep emerald orbs held a mix of disbelief and relief that mirrored her own. “Y/N/N?” Dean gasped, relief filling his body at the fact that the demon kept her end of the bargain. “Hey” Y/N breathed out, still confused. “Thank God” Dean was close to tears again as he rushed over to her.

He wasted no time in pulling her into his arms, crushing her against his chest. It was as if he was trying to convince himself that she was real, that she was okay. He buried his face into her hair, inhaling her scent as he held her tightly.

‘Falling just as hard’

‘I'd rather lose somebody than use somebody’

She was bewildered by his display of affection, but she didn’t resist. Instead, she wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him just as tightly. Her eyes fluttered shut as she melted into his embrace. She could feel the tension and worry emanating from him like a wave.

Dean pulled away to look at her clearly, cupping her cheek in his hand. He couldn’t stop him from what he was about to do. Dean leaned down and kissed her forehead, then her cheek, then her nose. “Thank god…thank god” Dean muttered as he peppered kisses all over her face.

‘Maybe it's a blessing in disguise (I sold my soul for you)’

‘I see my reflection in your eyes’

He was almost desperately clinging on to her like he was afraid that she would slip right out of his arms. Y/N now utterly taken back. Her heart was pounding in her chest as Dean showered her with kisses. The way he looked at her, held her, it was as if he thought he'd never get to touch her again.

She melted into his embrace again, relishing the feeling of his lips against her skin. It was tender and gentle, full of a love and longing she hadn't seen from him before. A feeling she had been dying to witness.

“Uh, Dean-” Y/N chuckled, groaning a bit from the pain in her back. Dean stopped when he heard her grumble in pain. “Sorry, I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m just- I’m just happy to see you up and around, that’s all” He apologized, smiling. She chuckled again, nodding, wincing as she felt the pain in her back flare up.

“Come on, sit down” Dean ushered her back to the bed, helping her sit down. “Okay.” she breathed out, “Dean, what happened to me?” Y/N asked, groaning as Dean sat next to her. “Well, what do you remember?” Dean asked, now having to choose his words carefully.

She closed her eyes, trying to remember the last thing that happened to her. It was all a bit hazy and her head throbbed as she tried to focus.

“I remember…I had a vision of Sam getting stabbed. And I pushed him out of the way. Then- then I told you boys how much I loved you…and um…” She said slowly, deciding to choose her words carefully. “Then I felt this pain. This sharp pain, like white hot, you know? It hurt like hell and then…darkness”

Dean nodded as he listened to her recalling the events of last night. “Yeah, that- that kid went to stab Sam in his back. But you took the hit, you lost a lot of blood. You know, it was pretty touch and go for a while” he lied, his heart tightening at the thought of what happened. He reached out and placed his hand on her leg, giving it a comforting squeeze.

Y/N’s brows furrowed, “Charming, you can’t patch up a wound that bad. I mean, I thought I was a goner” She pointed out. “No, Bobby could. And Jo used that witchy spell book you have hidden in your hatchback, grinded up some herbs and bam” Dean lied again, hoping she took the bait.

Y/N looked at him skeptically for a moment but nodded again. She wasn’t sure if she believed everything he said because she never thought Jo the spell for the healing balm she had been working on concocting but she had no reason to doubt him. Plus her head hurt enough, she didn’t feel like questioning everything he was saying.

“Who was that kid anyway?” Dean asked, changing the subject. “His names Jake” Y/N frowned. “Did you get him?” She asked. “No. He disappeared into the woods” Dean told her, “We gotta find him, Dean” Y/N’s blood began boiling as she thought of Jake. “And I swear, I’m gonna tear that son of a bitch apart” She snarled as she tried to get up.

Dean quickly grabbed her shoulders, gently pushing her back down to sit. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Easy Van Damme” He scolded her, raising a brow. “You just woke up. Let’s get you something to eat, alright? Huh? You want something to eat?” Despite the pain in her back, Y/N’s stomach growled loudly at the mention of food.

As if reacting on cue, she nodded, not allowing her eyes to meet his. Dean smiled, “I’m starving” Y/N chuckled at his words as he offered her his hand. She took his hand, her slender fingers wrapping around his much larger ones as she stood up. “Can we get a cookie?” She asked him, grinning widely as she flashed him her signature puppy dog eyes.

Despite the intensity of the situation, Dean cracked a smile at her request. “We can get you all the cookies you want, princess” he quipped, chuckling at the way she looked up at him with her pleading eyes.

Y/N was giving Dean the rundown of the event from the previous night. “And that’s when you guys showed up” Y/N said with a mouth stuffed with cookies, a mostly empty pizza box laid out on the grass in an empty park where they sat, enjoying their food.

Dean nodded as he listened to her retelling the story, his arms resting on his bent knees as he sat on the grass next to her. He had a slice of pizza in his hands, his eyes fixed on her as she spoke, his heart aching in his chest at what she and Sam had gone through.

“That’s awful. Poor Andy” Dean muttered. “Demon said he only wanted one of us to walk out alive.” Y/N told him, sipping her soda. “He told you that?” Dean asked, biting into his pizza. “Yup” Y/N nodded, “Appeared in a dream” She scoffed, “He tell you anything else?” Dean asked.

Her mind went back to when the demon revealed to her that she and Sam had demon blood in them. But she couldn’t tell Dean that. The dude already mocked her for being psychic relentlessly, she didn’t want him to see her as even more of a freak. As much as the mockery was playful, the thought of him seeing her as a freak was heartbreaking for her.

“No. No, that was it, nothing else” Y/N quickly shook her head in response. Dean nodded again, his eyes scanning her face. Part of him was suspicious. He could tell she was lying, her eyes avoided his gaze for a moment and she responded a little too quickly. But he chose not to press on it.

“You know, what I don’t get, is that if the demon only wanted one of us…how did Jake, Sam and I all get away?” Y/N thought out loud, changing the subject as she picked up one of the garlic knots from the smaller box, biting into it.

Dean’s breath hitched in his throat as Y/N chewed on the garlic knot and furrowed her brows as if it was a mystery, all the while internally trying to come up with a response. “Well, I mean, they left you and Sam for dead. I’m sure they thought it was over” Dean shrugged, clearing his throat before taking a large nervous bite of his pizza.

Y/N nodded again, not buying Dean’s explanation. She could tell he was hiding something from her, just like she was hiding something from him. The thought made her uneasy, but she decided not to push on it.

“Now that Yellow-Eyes has Jake, what’s he gonna do with him?” Dean asked Y/N through a mouth full of cheese. The psychic rolled her eyes before taking up a napkin to wipe the sauce that was dripping down the side of his mouth.

The action comes off natural and almost familiar. Her fingers lingering on his chin for a split second.

“I don’t know,” she grumbled, wiping a smudge of sauce from his lip with her thumb before tossing the dirty napkin into the empty pizza box. “But whatever it is, we gotta stop it.” She was determined.

Dean raised a brow as he watched her wipe the sauce from his mouth, her touch setting off butterflies in his stomach. “Alright, hold on, you need to get your rest” Dean interrupted her, “We got time” He assured her. “No, we don’t” Y/N scuffed stubbornly, pushing herself to her feet. She began to gather up the garbage from the ground, Dean pushed himself up from his feet, following her over to the trash like a lost puppy.

“Y/N, oceans aren’t boiling, okay? Frogs aren’t raining from the sky. Let’s get your strength back first” Dean tried to reason with her, his voice raising as she discarded the rubbish. She spun around to glare at him defiantly, her hands on her hips, “I’m fine” She growled, her eyes narrowing. Dean scoffed in disbelief and rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, you’re fine,” he retorted sarcastically. “You almost died last night” He reminded her, his tone sharp and stern. Y/N’s mouth snapped shut, she defiantly crossed her arms over her chest. Huffing in defeat, hating the fact that Dean was right. “Well, did you call the Roadhouse? They know anything?” She asked, Dean’s blood ran cold at the question.

He knew he had to tell her the truth about everyone at the Roadhouse but he didn’t know how. He slowly shook his head, “Yeah” He admitted, his voice wavering slightly. Y/N narrowed her eyes, ‘Dean senses’ going off at the tone in his voice.

“Dean, what is it?” She asked, Dean heavily sighed before turning to face her. “The Roadhouse burned to the ground. Ash is dead. Probably Ellen, a lot of other hunters too.” Dean revealed. Y/N’s eyes grew wide in horror as he words, her heart thumping against her chest.

“What?” She whispered, the shock and disbelief clear in her voice. “Jo-” She gasped, pressing her hand to her mouth. Dean quickly shook his head, “No, she- she’s alive” He quickly reassured her, seeing the panic on her face. Despite the comfort that Y/N felt at the news, her heart ached for the people lost in the fire. For Ash.

He had always been a kind man to her. He was a flirtatious bastard but he was also kind and did anything she asked. She looked up at Dean, her eyes shimmering with tears that threatened to fall, “Demons?” She managed to choke out. “Yeah, we think so. We think because Ash found something” Dean nodded, his jaw clenched as he spoke.

Y/N’s face twisted in anger, “What did he find?” Her voice raised as she spoke, the tears now streaming down her face. “Bobby’s working on that with Sam and Jo.” Dean told her. She nodded, before taking our her bike keys from her pocket. “Well come on then, Bobby’s only a few hours away.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop, Y/N, stop, dammit!” Dean grabbed her arm, stopping her from walking away, Y/N’s face contorted with pain from her back. “Listen to me, I’m gonna say it again. You almost died in there. I mean, what would I have-” His words died in his throat. Dean inhaled deeply as Y/N eyed him curiously.

“Look, can’t you just take care of yourself for a little bit, huh? Just a little bit” Dean pleaded. “I’m sorry, sweetie. No.” Y/N shook her head. Her words and the pet name coming out casually made the butterflies in his stomach erupt again. He couldn’t focus, his mind racing as Y/N looked up at him with her big (e/c) eyes, her head tilted to the side, a pout on her lips.

That simple look was enough to make Dean Winchester give up his soul again. “Fuck” he muttered to himself, letting go of her arm before shoving his hands into his pockets as a triumphant smiled spread across her face.

____________________________________________

Sioux Falls, South Dakota

Dean knocked on Bobby’s door, shoving his hands nervously in his pocket as Y/N stood next to him. The door opened to reveal Bobby, his face was grim with exhaustion clearly evident in his eyes. His hair was a mess and clothes were wrinkled, his usual trucker hat absent from his head.

The hunter’s eyes widened with shock and terror as he faced a very much alive Y/N. Her eyes softened, her face twitching into a smile. “Hey, Bobby” Dean muttered, not making eye contact with Bobby. “Hey, Bobby” Y/N smiled.

A moment of silence passed between the trio as Bobby took a moment to process the sight in front of him. Then he looked between Dean and Y/N, “Y/N. It’s good to…see you around” Bobby’s tone was inexplainable. “Well, thanks to you and Jo for patching me up” Y/N chuckled, patting him on his shoulder before walking in. “Don’t mention it”

“Hey Bobby, I got the-” Jo said as she came walking in from the kitchen with the coffee pot, the glass slipped from her hand as an audible gasp left her lips when her eyes landed on Y/N. The sound of shattering glass made Y/N flinch and freeze in spot, her eyes meeting Jo’s. Her hands slowly raised as tears of happiness welled up in her eyes, “You’re-” Jo didn’t get to finish her sentence.

Because Sam came rushing down into the room with just his towel on around his waist, sopping wet as if he had just gotten out of the shower. A gun in his hand, “What’s going o- Y/N?!” Y/N spun around to face Sam, her eyes wide, a small smile on her face. “Hi, Sammy” She greeted him, holding back the tears as best as she could.

That failed and the tears started to fall down her face. Sam lowered the gun, his eyes growing wide with shock and relief. Sam and Jo engulfed her into a group hug, squeezing her tightly, all while shooting Dean harsh glares.

“I’m glad to see you’re okay” Sam whispered, placing a kiss on the top of her head. “I can’t believe it,” Jo added, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. Y/N chuckled from her position between the two of them, her small body smothered by both tall people. “Me too, I thought I was a goner.” She managed to huff out.

“Dean told me you used my herb spell book to patch me up. Thanks” Y/N said gratefully, gently pinching Jo’s cheek. The huntress’ heart dropped, lying to her best friend wasn’t something she wanted to do. “Yeah, anytime” Jo chuckled awkwardly as Y/N turned back around. Sam and Jo shared a terrified look.

Y/N wiped the tears from her cheeks as her eyes met with Dean’s, who was leaning against the wall with a guilty look on his face. Bobby was eying Dean so bad, if looks could kill, Dean would have an early visit to hell.

Dean couldn’t look anyone in their eyes, “Well, Y/N’s better. And we’re back in it now, so…what do you guys know?” Dean asked. Bobby’s glare didn’t stop there, Sam and Jo were on edge themselves, thinking Dean did the worst thing possible. The tension was palpable. Y/N noticed everyone was silent, feeling a bit awkward.

“Well, we found something but we’re not sure what the hell it means” Bobby told them, all now in his living room. “What is it?” Y/N asked, taking a deep breath as she crossed her arms over her chest. “Demonic omens. It’s like a fucking tidal wave” A now fully dressed Sam began, running his hand through his hair in frustration.

“Cattle deaths, lightning storms. They’ve skyrocketed from nowhere” Jo added, using her fingers to list them off. “Here” Bobby said, turning the map with all the sightings circled off to face Dean and Y/N. “All around here, except for one place” Bobby gestured to the map before placing it down on a certain state.

“Southern Wyoming” Y/N and Dean’s brows furrowed at Bobby’s words. “Wyoming?” Dean questioned. “Yeah, that one area’s totally clean. Spotless” Sam stated, “It’s almost as if…” Jo began, but trailed off, crossing her arms over her chest. “What?” Y/N cocked her brow, urging her on. Jo’s eyes flickered over to Y/N, a flash of fear playing in them.

“…the demons are surrounding it” Jo finished. Dean’s eyes widened, “But you guys don’t know what?” He asked. “No, and by this point my eyes are swimming” Bobby sighed in frustration before turning to Y/N with a soft expression. “Y/N, would you take a look at it. Let Jo and Sam help you, maybe y’all can catch something I couldn’t” Bobby said gently.

Y/N nodded, “Yeah, sure Bobby” She smiled sadly before turning her back to them, trying to get a better look at the map. Bobby then turned his attention to Dean, the soft expression faltering. “Come on, Dean. I got some more books in the truck. Help me lug em in” His tone was almost deathly. Dean swallowed harshly.

“Yeah, sure” Was all Dean could muster up as they made their way into the scrap yard, out of earshot from everyone. The sound of the screen door shutting behind them made Y/N’s ears twitch, her head tilting to listen. Y/N could hear the sounds of Bobby and Dean talking, but couldn’t make out what they were saying.

“Hey, Jo. Can I talk to Sam, alone?” Y/N asked Jo, giving her a small smile. “Sure” Jo smiled back before walking off . Y/N turned her attention back to the taller man. “So…” She began awkwardly. “Yeah, uh” Sam scratched the back of his head nervously as he eyed Y/N carefully.

He couldn’t stop the thoughts racing through his head, wondering how she could have just come back to life after being murdered. He knew his brother had something to do with it and the thought made him sick.

“What did yellow-eyes tell you?” Y/N swallowed harshly as she asked this, remembering the fact that they both had demon blood in them since birth. Sam stiffened at her question and Y/N let out a shaky sigh, the two shared a nervous look, neither one of them willing to say it out loud. “We can’t tell, Dean” Sam finally broke his silence.

“Yeah” Was all Y/N could manage as tears welled up in the corners of her eyes. “He’ll think we’re fucking freaks” Y/N scoffed, wiping the corners of her eyes. “We aren’t freaks” Sam reassured her, his facial expression full of sadness. “We didn’t ask for this” Sam placed his hand gently on her shoulder, she glanced up at him.

The tone of Sam’s voice was almost as if he was trying to convince himself and he wasn’t sure. Y/N instantly picked up on that, “Are you trying to convince me or yourself?” She chuckled dryly. “Both” Sam smiled sadly at her, giving her shoulder a gentle pat before letting go. Y/N gave him a sad smile in response before standing up to walk over to the table filled with different weapons, books, and maps.

“You stupid ass! What did you do?!” Bobby’s exclaims were directed towards Dean with pure rage and fury. His heart sunk in his chest, the dread pooling in his gut at the thought of Bobby’s disappointment. Dean’s head tilted to the ground as Bobby snatched him by his collar, shaking him. “WHAT DID YOU DO?!”

Dean still refused to answer him, dread filled Bobby’s heart when he realized exactly what Dean had done. “You made a deal. For Y/N, didn’t you?” Bobby’s voice shook when he asked the obvious question. Dean’s eyes stayed fixated on the ground, his mouth refusing to answer the question or to disagree.

Bobby was watching him intently, waiting for an answer. “How long did they give you?” Bobby narrowed his eyes at the elder Winchester. “Bobby” Dean shook his head. “How long?!” Bobby shoved Dean harshly by his chest. “One year,” Dean said, his voice low. He didn’t react to his shove push, keeping his eyes to the ground as he tried to avoid Bobby’s enraged gaze.

“Damn it. Dean” Bobby groaned, shaking his head. “Which is why we gotta find this yellow-eyed son of a bitch.” Dean said determined. “That’s why I’m gonna kill him myself. I mean, I got nothing to lose now, right?” Dean shrugged. Bobby snatched Dean by his collar again. “I could throttle you!” Bobby exclaimed, shaking him.

“Oh, and what? send me downstairs ahead of schedule?” Dean shot back snarkily. Bobby scoffed, a flash of rage again in his eyes at Dean’s words before he let go of his collar. “What is it with you Winchesters and L/Ns, huh? You, F/N, your dad, you’re all just itching to throw yourselves down the pit” Bobby snapped. Dean's face dropped.

“That’s my point. Dad brought me back, Bobby. I’m not even supposed to be here!” Bobby’s mouth dropped open as Dean continued. “At least this way, something good can come out of it, you know? Like my life could mean something” Bobby was stunned into silence, staring down at Dean like he had lost his mind.

“What?! And it didn’t before?! Have you got that low an opinion of yourself?!” He yelled, snatching him by his collar again. “Are you that fucked in the head?!” Tears welled up in both men’s eyes as Dean forced himself to finally look Bobby in the eye. “I couldn’t let her die, Bobby.” Dean’s voice cracked, his eyes glazed over red.

“I couldn’t. She’s the love of my life” He confessed. Bobby held onto Dean’s collar for a while longer. His heart ached for him as he listened to the elder Winchester’s voice crack as he confessed that much to him. He’s never seen him so vulnerable before, never heard Dean say that out loud about Y/N.

“How is the love of your life gonna feel when she knows you’re going to hell? How is YOUR BROTHER gonna feel when he knows you’re going to hell? How’d you feel when you knew your dad went for you?!” Bobby shook him again.

Bobby’s words struck Dean right in the heart. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he thought back to last year when John took the swan dive to the pit, the feeling of utter helplessness and fear he felt. He didn’t think his absence could possibly make her feel that kind of anguish. Sure she cared for him as family but she didn’t love him, so it shouldn’t hurt her as much, right?

Was it his actions based on his pure and genuine love for her? Or was it his selfishness in never wanting her to leave him, even if she wasn’t his. “You can’t tell her. You take a shot at me, whatever you gotta do. But please, don’t tell her” Dean pleaded, weakly shaking his head.

“Please, Bobby,” Dean repeated, staring right into his eyes. “Please don’t tell her” Bobby’s shoulders slumped in defeat as he dropped his grip on Dean’s shirt. Both men with tears in their eyes, desperately trying not to cry. Before Bobby could say anything, the sound of tools clattering in the background made their heads snap in its direction.

Dean and Bobby shared a wide eyed look before ducking behind a car. The two peered around the side, both silent as they saw a shadow at the corner of their eyes. Dean’s hand hovered over his gun in his waistband, silently watching this figure move around the corners, looking as though they were searching for something.

Bobby too, had a firm grip on his own gun, his knuckles turning white. They instantly grabbed the person, both in shock when they realized who it was. “Ellen?!” It was indeed Ellen. Although her appearance took a toll. Her clothes were messy and torn, a few strands of hair stuck to her face and her skin was paler than usual. She nodded, tears welling up in her eyes.

“Ellen. Oh, god” Dean breathed out in relief, hugging her tightly. The motherly woman hugged him back just as tightly, a few tears streaming down her face. Bobby, despite his anger and disappointment towards Dean, was just as relieved as the other two, joining in on the hug. “Jo, where’s Jo?” Ellen immediately asked for her daughter, looking around the yard frantically.

“She's inside. She’s safe” Dean reassured her, rubbing her arms gently. “Thank god” She sighed, wiping away the tears while taking deep, uneven breaths. She quickly broke out of Dean’s hug and pushed herself to Bobby’s front door. Dean and Bobby followed behind her, Bobby reaching for the front door knob as Ellen burst through it.

“Joanna Beth!” Ellen cried out. They heard rustling, followed by Sam’s voice. “Mom?! Is that you?” Y/N and Jo immediately came into view, having risen from the spot they were sitting in, Sam following behind her, an urgent look on his face. Jo was in disbelief, thinking her mom was dead from the fire.

Her heart was beating out of his chest, “Mommy!” Jo cried, hurdling herself into her mothers arms. Ellen held her close, tears streaming down her eyes as she cradled the back of Jo’s head. “Oh, sweet girl, I thought I lost you” She breathed out shakily, kissing the top of her hair.

Sam and Y/N stood by, smiles on their faces as they watched the touching reunion, seeing the relief and comfort on their faces. Dean’s heart softened at the sight, his eyes quickly flickering over in Y/N’s direction. A small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.

They were all now sitting at Bobby’s dining room table. Bobby poured some holy water into a shot glass before sliding it across to Ellen’s side. “Bobby, is this really necessary?” Ellen scoffed. “She’s fine, Bobby. Seriously” Y/N assured him but Bobby was still skeptical. “Just a belt of holy water. Shouldn’t hurt” Bobby shrugged.

Ellen, with a stoic expression, downed the holy water with no hesitation. They all stayed quiet, watching for any reaction. “Whiskey, now. If you don’t mind” She sassed, wiping her mouth before sliding the glass across the table back to Bobby.

“Mom, what happened? How did you get out?” Jo asked concerned but relieved to see her mom alive and well. Ellen took a deep breath, “I wasn’t supposed to. I was supposed to be in there with everybody else” She muttered before scoffing. “But we ran out of pretzels, of all things” Ellen shook her head as Bobby slid the shot glass back to her.

“It was just dumb luck” She said before downing the whiskey. Dean, Sam, Y/N, and Jo watched intently, still baffled by the events they had all just witnessed. They knew Ellen was a tough cookie, especially Jo knew, but their mouths remained opened anyways as they heard the rest of the story. “Anyway, that’s when Ash called, panic in his voice”

Tears welled up in Ellen and Jo’s eyes, “He told me to look in the safe. Then the call cut out. By the time I got back, the flames were sky high. Everybody was dead, I couldn’t have been gone more than 15 minutes” The room fell silent as they took in that statement. Jo put her hand on her mom’s shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

Y/N held her hands together on her lap, letting the words sink in. “I’m sorry, Ellen” Y/N offered her sympathy, giving Jo a small smile. “A lot of good people died in there. And I got to live” Ellen said, emotion clear in her voice. “Lucky me” She scoffed.

Jo winced at the dark remark, “I’m sorry, honey” Ellen apologized, her throat caught in a lump. Jo shook her head, “At least you’re okay” She assured, reaching over and grabbing her mothers hand, bringing it to her lips and placing a gentle kiss on the back of her knuckles.

“Ellen, you mentioned a safe,” Bobby asked quietly. “A hidden safe we kept in the basement.” Ellen nodded. “Demons get what was in it?” Bobby asked. “No” Ellen shook her head before reaching into her jacket to retrieve a map. She opened it out on the table, turning it to face Sam, Dean and Y/N. “Wyoming?” Dean and Sam gaped. “What does that mean?” Y/N muttered, toying with her necklace.

Hours of research later, “I don’t believe it” Bobby gasped as he walked out of the kitchen with a book, placing it down in front of the map. “What? You got something?” Jo asked, “A lot more than that” Bobby grumbled, tracing his fingers over the map from the safe which had X’s at random points marks around it.

“Each of these X’s is an abandoned frontier church, all mid-19th century. And all of them…built by Samuel Colt” Bobby revealed, everyone's eyes widened. “Samuel Colt? The demon-killing, gun-making Samuel Colt?” Dean asked in shock. “Yep. And there’s more” Bobby nodded. “He built private railway lines connecting church to church..” Bobby then began drawing on the map.

“…that just happens to lay out like this” The church’s connected in the shape of a pentagram…a devil's trap. “Tell me that’s not what I think it is,” Dean muttered in shock. “It’s a Devil’s Trap” Sam said with wide eyes, Dean and Y/N wiped their mouths simultaneously in shock. “A hundred square mile devils trap” Jo added, running a hand through her hair.

“That’s fucking brilliant. Iron lines, demons can’t cross” Y/N muttered as she shook her head, impressed and baffled by the idea. “I’ve never heard of anything that massive,” Ellen commented. “No one has,” Bobby added. “And after all these years, none of the lines are broken? I mean, it still works?” Dean asked.

Realization dawned on Sam and Y/N, the two sharing a look. “Definitely.” Sam said. “How do you know?” Jo asked, raising a brow. “All those omens we found. I mean, the demons, they must be circling and they can’t get in” Sam explained. “Yeah, well, they’re trying” Y/N scoffed, running a hand over her mouth.

“Why? What’s inside?” Ellen asked curiously. “That’s what I’ve been looking for. And, uh, there’s nothing except an old cowboy cemetery right in the middle” Dean told them, pointing to the middle of the devils trap drawn on the map. “Why? What’s so important about a cemetery? What’s Colt trying to protect?” Jo muttered.

Dean and Y/N shared a look now, both thinking the same thing. “Well, unless…” Dean trailed off. “Unless what?” Bobby asked. “What if Colt wasn’t trying to keep the demons out? What if he was trying to keep something in?” Y/N suggested, “Well, that’s a comforting thought” Ellen deadpanned.

“Yeah, you think” Jo scoffed, “Could they do it Bobby? Could they get inside?” Sam asked nervously. “This thing’s so powerful. You’d practically need an A-Bomb to get in. No way a full-blood demon gets across” Bobby scoffed. Sam and Y/N shared a wide eyed look.

The two realized now why Yellow-Eyes needed one of his “special children”. “No. But we know who could” Y/N groaned, Jake was gonna fill out the demon’s and get over that trap.

____________________________________________

Wyoming

The trio, Bobby, Ellen and Jo all scattered across the cowboy cemetery, armed to the T. Waiting for Jake to show, it was nightfall, Sam stayed hidden behind old tombs with Jo while Bobby and Ellen hid behind the crypt alone. Dean and Y/N were a couple yards away from Sam and Jo, hidden behind another large tomb.

They all watched intently from different spots, waiting patiently for Jake, all on alert at any sign or sound. “Jesus, where is he?” Y/N muttered impatiently, wiping the sweat from her brow. It became silent amongst them, a sign that they all thought. Just as they had this thought, the creaking of the old gate opening followed by footsteps towards the crypt were welcomed into their ears.

Y/N’s body immediately went on the defensive upon spotting Jake’s figure slowly walking through the gate, her eyes scanning the area. Dean and Sam kept a close eye on him. He stopped in front of the old crypt, staring at it intently. Sam gave Dean a curt nod, indicating for them to reveal themselves.

Jo and Y/N followed to suit while Bobby and Jo moved from behind the crypt. “Howdy, Jake” Sam snarled at him, all hunters aiming their guns at him. “Surprise motherfucker” Y/N quipped, glaring at him. Jake’s blood when his eyes landed on her, widening as his pulse started to race. “No. You were dead. I killed you” Jake gaped.

Dean’s face twisted into a sneer, narrowing his eyes. Jake shook his head, eyes flickering between the hunters all surrounding him. “I did! I cut clean through your spinal cord” Jake insisted. Y/N was in shock, the rapid healing of her wound making sense. Even with the healing balm from her spell book, her tattoo wouldn’t have been intact.

Her eyes flickered over to Dean who wore a guilt ridden expression, her heart plummeted to her feet as Jake continued. “You can’t be alive. You can’t be” Jake shook his head, eyes still wide with horror. “Okay, just take it real easy there, son” Bobby warned, glaring at the army vet. “And if I don't?” Jake challenged.

“Wait and see!” Sam bellowed, “What, you a tough guy all of a sudden? What are you gonna do, kill me?” Jake scoffed, “It’s a thought” Sam clenched his jaw, tightening his grip on his gun. There was no way he was hesitating to kill him this time. Last time, it cost Y/N her life. He was not letting Jake slip away again.

Jake’s lip curled into a twisted smile as he let out a scoff. Dean clenched his jaw as a chill ran down his spine from hearing the tone of his voice. Jake took a step towards Y/N and Dean aimed his gun to the air, shooting a bullet into the sky before pointing it a foot away from his face. “Don't you DARE take another step,” Dean growled.

“You had your chance. You both had your chance. You couldn’t” Jake said to Sam and Y/N. “Well we won’t make that mistake twice” Y/N spat, her eyes spitting in Jake’s direction. Jake chuckled darkly, this made Dean’s blood run cold. “What are you smiling at, you little bitch?” The elder Winchester snarled.

Jake smirked, his eyes flickering over to Jo, a nasty grin on his face. “Hey sexy, do me a favor.” His eyes glowed a tiny ball of yellow before saying, “Put that gun to your head” Jo glared at him, but fear soon took over her face as she tried to fight off his control. Shakily placing the gun to her temple. “No!” Ellen almost sobbed as she watched her daughter place the gun to her temple against her will.

Sam’s heart plummeted as Y/N’s eyes widened. “You too, lady” Jake smirked at Ellen, making her do the exact same as Jo. A dark smile taking over his face, everyone’s blood ran cold. “See that Ava girl was right. Once you give into it, there’s all sorts of new Jedi Mind Tricks you can learn” Jake’s eyes darkened.

Sam’s heart froze, his hand still wrapped around the handle of his gun. “Let her go!!” Sam demanded, “Sammy, shoot..him..” Jo pleaded, her tone shaky. “You’ll be mopping up skull before you get a shot off” Jake shrugged, daring them to take a shot. No one moved a muscle, not willing to make a move.

“Everybody put your guns down” Jake demanded as Jo and Ellen shook with fear. “Except you, sweethearts” He smirked at them. They all did as they were told, guns clattering to the ground. Jake smirked, his eyes glowing bright yellow. Bobby went first, then Dean, then Y/N. But Sam was still gripping his gun, “Put.It.Down” Jake demanded again.

Jo was on the brink of crying watching this all unfold, “Shoot him, Sammy!" She pleaded, her voice quivering. Sam looked at the gun he was still holding, then up to Jake’s glowing eyes. His expression was torn with internal battle. “Your bitch’ll be dead, the second you empty that chamber, I promise you” Jake threatened through gritted teeth.

This was all it took for Sam to surrender, holding his gun up before placing it on the ground. “Okay, thank you” Jake smirked, he then quickly spun around, taking out the Colt. Dean, Y/N and Bobby took the chance to knock the guns Jo and Ellen had aimed at their head. Dean and Bobby knocked it out of Ellen’s hand while Y/N knocked it out of Jo’s hand.

Sam quickly picked up his gun from the ground, aiming it at Jake. The sound of two bullets escaping the chambers bellowed through the cemetery as Jake stuck the Colt into the crypt unlocking it. Several bullets pierced into Jake’s back, the culprit being Sam with a dark look on his face.

Jake fell to the ground, bleeding from his mouth, gasping for air as Sam stood over him, his gun aimed straight at his chest. “Please-…please…no, n-” Jake’s pleas were cut short when Sam emptied the last of his chamber, the blood splattering across his face. Everyone was shocked at the cold move by Sam.

Y/N’s stomach was churning as she followed behind Dean, her eyes on Jake’s bullet ridden body. The crypt was still turning since Jake unlocked it before Sam killed him. Bobby walked slowly over to the old crypt with slow steps, everyone following him closely. The crypt door creaked loudly with a thud, “Oh no” Bobby muttered in fear. “Bobby, what is it?” Ellen asked. “It’s hell”

With Bobby’s words, Dean instantly took the Colt out of the keyhole. “Take cover! Now!” Bobby shouted, pushing Ellen over to take cover while Dean grabbed Y/N’s hand and Jo grabbed Sam’s hand, all throwing themselves over tombs to hide behind headstones.

The crypt door finally came crashing down with a loud and thunderous bang, black smoke clouding the skies as demons escaped from Hell. The ground beneath them shaking like an earthquake was in effect, thunder and lightning filling the sky.

“What the fuck just happened?!” Y/N shouted, that burning feeling she usually had whenever demons were around skyrocketed. Her entire body was heated, “That's a devil's gate, a damn door to hell!” Ellen shouted back in response over the thunderous sounds. “Come on, we gotta shut that gate!” Jo yelled, everyone did as told, rushing over to the gate as Dean held the Colt in his hands.

A thought crossed his mind, “If the demon gave to Jake…then maybe..” Dean said in realization, a flash of smoke came across his eyes, indicating he might be right before turning around to aim the gun at Azazel. The Yellow Eyed Demon waved his hand in the air, summoning the gun from Dean’s hand to his. “Boys shouldn’t play with Daddy’s guns,” Azazel smirked.

With a tilt of his head, he sent Dean flying across the cemetery, causing the Hunter to hit his head on a tombstone. “CHARMING!!” “DEAN!!” Y/N and Sam screamed when they saw Azazel toss Dean in the air, currently at the gate, trying to shut the Devil’s Gate with the help of Bobby, Ellen, Jo and Sam. All grunting heavily as they strained to shut the door.

Sam and Y/N instantly ran over to aid Dean, but Azazel waved his hand, sending Sam barreling back-first into a tree and Y/N into a tombstone, across from Dean. “I’ll get to you two in a minute, kids. But I’m proud of you, Sammy. I knew you had it in ya” Azazel grinned before turning to Dean with yellow eyes. The elder Winchester was attempting to get out but the demon pushed him back down.

“So Dean, I gotta thank you” Azazel stated mockingly. Dean, gritting his teeth trying to resist the mind grip, struggling as Azazel stooped down in front of him. “You see, demons can’t resurrect people unless a deal is made.” The demon began, “I know, red tape, it’ll make you nuts” He mused. “But thanks to you, Y/N’s back in rotation” Azazel grinned.

Dean’s eyes darkened and Y/N’s filled with tears, “Now, I wasn’t counting on that but I’m glad. I like her and Sammy better than Jake anyhow” Azazel chuckled, “Besides she’s got that ‘mojo’ thing going on” Azazel smirked, grabbing Dean’s chin and lifting his head up. Dean shook with disgust, “Tell me, have you ever heard the expression: If a deal sounds too good to be true, it probably is?”

Dean’s eyes glanced over at Y/N, “No…no” Y/N was in disbelief, shaking her head, pleading that Dean didn’t know what she thought he did. Guilt and shame washed over him, “You call that a good deal?” Dean gritted his teeth at Azazel. “Aw, it’s a better shake than your Dad got…and you never wondered why. I’m surprised at you” Azazel shot back, hitting a nerve before moving closer to Dean.

“I mean, you saw what your brother just did to Jake right? That was pretty cold wasn’t it? Good thing it wasn’t Y/N, she would’ve probably nailed him to the cross” Azazel chuckled darkly. “How certain are you that what you brought back is 100% pure Y/N? Are you even sure that she and Sam are 100% pure?” He mused.

Dean’s face paled and his throat closed, staring at Azazel in horror. Sam and Y/N shared a terrified look. Y/N’s eyes grazed over the area, looking for the Colt. When her eyes landed on it, on the ground next to Azazel, she attempted to summon the Colt into her hands but the hold the demon had on her was weakening her powers.

“You of all people should know that what’s dead should stay dead” Azazel gritted his teeth at Dean, who scoffed, shaking with anger. “Anyway” The demon sighed before dusting off his pants, “Thanks a bunch, I knew I kept you alive for some reason. Until now anyway” The demon grinned as he picked up the Colt from the ground, aiming it at Dean.

“I couldn’t have done it without your pathetic self-loathing, self-destructive desire to sacrifice yourself for your family.” Suddenly, the spirits of John Winchester and F/N L/N appeared behind Azazel, both men wrapped their arms around him before he could shoot Dean. Dean and Y/N’s eyes widened when they saw their fathers. A loud gasp leaving Sam’s mouth.

The body Azazel was possessing dropped dead to the ground, “Daddy?” Y/N gasped as the veteran hunters wrestled with the black smoke that left the body Azazel was possessing, holding him down for long enough for Dean to retrieve the Colt. Within a few seconds, the demon smoke went barreling back into the body.

Azazel got up with wide eyes to see Dean aiming the Colt straight at him. Without hesitation, Dean Winchester used the last bullet of the Colt, aiming straight at the heart. Blood spewed out of the wound, almost as if the bullet stunned the demon. An orangish light glowed through the body, seizing for a few seconds before dropping dead to the floor.

Sam and Y/N finally escaped from the hold Azazel had on them, now able to breath, dropping to the ground. Ellen, Bobby and Jo finally got the gates closed, all grunting and screaming as the door creaked inwards, shutting completely.

Sam, Dean and Y/N pushed themselves up from the ground to see the spirit of their Dads. A tearful moment for them all, John stepped forward and placed a hand on his elder son's shoulder, tears cascading down his cheeks before he turned to his younger son, a bright smile in his direction. Sam nodded with tears in his eyes in response.

F/N placed his hand on Dean’s other shoulder, mouthing a quiet, “Thank you” to Dean for saving his daughter. Dean nodded back In responses shaking with emotion. F/N turned to his only daughter, a mournful smile on his face as he mouthed, “I love you” to his only child. “I love you too” Y/N mouthed back, her face creasing as she cried.

F/N and John stepped back, giving their children one last loving gaze before bursting into a bright white light, seemingly having found peace. Sam, Dean and Y/N were still in shock, “Well, check that off the to do list” Dean chuckled dryly, “You did it” Sam croaked, a flash of relief weighing off his chest.

“I didn’t do it alone” Dean smiled sadly, “Fellas, you think dad and John really-” Y/N’s words got caught in her throat. “You think they really climbed out of hell?” Dean chuckled dryly again, “The door was open, if anyone was stubborn enough to do it, it’ll be them” Dean snorted, Sam and Y/N nodded in tearful agreement.

“Where do you think they are now?” Sam asked, “I don’t know” Dean frowned, “I kind of can’t believe it guys. I mean- our whole lives, everything, has green prepping us for this. And now, I- I kind of don’t know what to say” Sam sniffled, shaking his head in disbelief. “I do.” Dean smirked before kneeling down besides the dead body Azazel was possessing.

“That was for our moms. You son of a bitch” Dean growled at him.

____________________________________________

Author's Note: HI AGAIN, so this next scene’s song inspo is Again by Noah Cyrus (hehehehe) ENJOY!

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Sioux Falls, South Dakota

The ride all the way back, Y/N hadn't said a word. She wouldn’t dare make eye contact with Dean, and it tore into his heart. It was until Y/N finally had enough of being in her own mind, she confronted Dean. Everyone was in Bobby’s living room when Y/N emerged, “I need you talk to you” She snapped at Dean.

Dean winced at her sudden blunt tone while everyone fell silent. He nodded in obedience while Y/N dragged him into Bobby's yard with a scowl on her face. The door slammed with a loud bang behind her as she turned on Dean, “You know, when Jake saw me, it was like he saw a ghost” She spat in Dean's direction, her arms folded across her chest with eyes burning with anger.

Dean fell silent, refusing to look at her as he stalked over to his car. “Don’t walk away from me! You heard him. He said he killed me!” Y/N called out to him, following behind Dean while heavy on her feet. She stopped him from getting it to his car, shutting the door as he opened it. “He was wrong” Dean lied. “I don’t think he was, Dean” Y/N spat, forcing Dean’s head to face her. “What happened after I was stabbed?”

“I already told you” Dean snapped back, flicking her hand off of his chin roughly. “Not everything” Y/N shot back, “Y/N, we just killed the demon. Can we celebrate for a minute?!” Dean exclaimed in frustration. “Did I die?” Y/N’s voice broke.

Dean’s heart clenched at Y/N’s broken tone, looking away from her. “Did you sell your soul for me like John did for you?” She demanded. “Oh come on! No!” Dean shouted, lying. “Tell me the truth. Charming, tell me the truth” Y/N pleaded. Dean clenched his jaw. Y/N’s eyes widened at the confirmation, “You did, didn’t you?” She cried out to him.

“I did it to save you” Dean confessed quietly with his head hung. "You- you sold your soul for me?" Y/N repeated, her voice shaky. "Dean, how could you do something so... idiotic and reckless? Don’t you realize what you’ve done?! What that means for you? Dammit.. you stupid stupid idiot!" Y/N raged, reeling her fist back before driving it into Bobby’s truck drivers side window.

Glass shattered everywhere, showering the surrounding area. Bobby's truck was now sporting a gaping hole where the driver's side window used to be.

He didn’t answer her, he just stood with his head hung. There was no denying the fear that flashed through his own eyes, what he did was not an easy decision to make. He knew the consequences. He knew that he was a walking dead man with a limited date, however, that wasn't what hurt him. What hurt him, was how Y/N was reacting, all because of him.

“You answer me when I’m speaking to you, dammit! How could you?! How could you just throw your life away!? Why?!” She growled, pushing him by his chest.

He stumbled backwards as she pushed him, his heart pounding in his chest. The mixture of anger and fear in her eyes cut through him like a knife.

"What did you want me to do, huh?!" Dean snapped back, his voice loud. "Watch you die? Let you go into the light?” He scoffed angrily. “No. I couldn't do it. I couldn't lose you. I had to save you."

“So, what!? You throw your life away for me?! You promised me Dean!!!” She sobbed. “You promised me that you wouldn’t do anything crazy if me or Sam died and you broke that!” Her heart was pounding through her chest, ready to give out. The look of guilt potent on Deans face.

“How long?” She demanded, but Dean shook his head. “HOW LONG?!” She shouted again, shoving him by his chest. “A YEAR!” Dean screamed. “I can’t believe this…I was dead! You of all people should know that’s not natural! We’re hunters, we die. That’s life!” She screamed enraged, smacking the back of her hand against her other palm as she yelled, a mixture of fleeting guilt that Dean just sacrificed his humanity for her.

“I don't care!” Dean shouted, his eyes burning with pain and frustration. His fists clenched and unclenched to his sides. “You wanna know why I did it? Huh?! I did it because I made a promise to your father on his deathbed that I’d keep you safe and I intended on keeping it. It’s my job to take care of you” Dean lied through his pearly white teeth.

“Don’t you dare feed that bullshit Dean Winchester. ” She snapped, pointing her finger at him. “I'm a grown ass woman, it is NOT your job to take care of me. We take care of EACH OTHER! I didn’t think letting us die in peace was supposed to be printed in INK!” She further raged, pacing the scrap yard.

“So you can keep a promise to my dead father but you can’t keep one to me? ME?!” Her chest heaved as she pointed to herself. “I wanna know the truth,” Y/N demanded. “Why?! How?! Why would you do that?!” She sobbed, her hands buried in her hair as she paced back and forward.

“I JUST TOLD YOU!”

“BULLSHIT!”

"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!" He shouted, in a pained and frustrated tone that shook his whole body. His own voice breaking with the weight of his confession.

He couldn’t hold back anymore, his emotions got the best of him, he didn’t care if he had to risk it all to get it out, he wasn’t leaving in a year and not let her know the truth, she deserved that much. She deserved the world. Better than he could offer. He may have just offered up his soul on a silver platter, but she deserved far more than that in his eyes.

Her pacing abruptly stopped, his words struck right into her heart. She looked at him like a deer in headlights. Y/N couldn’t believe what just came out of his mouth. She stood there, frozen like a statue, her face etched with shock and disbelief. Words refused to escape her, her mouth opened and closed several times but nothing came out. She just stared at him in silence.

His chest rose and fell with every heavy ragged breath. His green eyes burned with the intensity of his confession, as he stared back at her. His walls had finally crumbled, and he’d let the truth spill from his lips, like he was an open book.

"I love you, dammit! I love you more than anything in this world! I couldn't let you go. I couldn't just watch you die and do nothing! Because I can't imagine a life without you.” His tone was broken and pained.

Y/N’s heart sank to the floor, her face dropped. She was in utter shock and disbelief. Dean didn’t know what to do now, how long would it take her to say something? Would she laugh in his face? The silence was excruciating as he stood in front of her.

“W-what-“ Is all she could muster up.

Dean took a deep breath, his chest heaving with the weight of his confession. The area was eerily silent, the only sound was their ragged breathing. He took a few steps closer to her, his eyes never straying from hers. "You heard me," He said, trying to steady his voice.

"I- I’ve been holding back for so long..." He started, his voice barely above a whisper. “…because I didn't want to complicate things, but seeing you die.. that just..." Dean choked back a wave of emotion that threatened to overpower him.

"I love you, Y/N L/N. I didn't have the guts to say it out loud until now. I know you don't feel the same way but I can’t hide it anymore. Not after seeing you like that"

Y/N stood motionless, her eyes wider than saucers. Her heart thudded in her chest as she tried to process what Dean had just said. She couldn't believe it. The man she had always been in love with, the man she had never thought could feel the same way about her, had just confessed his love for her.

As the shock started to wear off, an array of emotions washed over her. Surprise, happiness, fear, guilt, and most of all, love. A million thoughts raced through her mind, but one prevailed above all else.

She loved him too. She always had.

She closed her eyes, convinced this was a dream, allowing his words to sink in. The fact that he thought she didn’t feel the same way ripped into her heart more than hearing he loved her back. Taking a couple seconds and deep breath, she reopened them, “Again. Say it again” Her breath hitched, her eyes piercing into his as she swallowed the growing lump in her throat.

He stepped even closer, gently taking her left hand in his. He looked directly into her eyes, his voice trembling slightly.

‘I wanna be your lover,’

‘I don't wanna be your friend’

"I love you, princess. I am hopelessly in love with you. I love everything about you. Your passion, your intelligence, your strength, and your stubbornness. I love the way you laugh and you roll your eyes at me when I make terrible puns. I love the way you smack me upside my head when I’m being an ass.” He listed off sincerely with a light chuckle as Y/N’s (e/c) eyes searched his emerald ones.

‘You don't know what you got 'til it's gone, my dear’

‘So tell me that you love me again (tell me that you love me again)’

“I love the way you scrunch your nose up and your eyebrows together when you’re focused and thinking hard about something. I love the way you look when you’re hunched over riding Quinn. Fuck, I love the way you crush a cigarette butt with your boot. I even love that you stole one of my shirts and act like you don’t know anything about it” He added with a small laugh. “I've been in love with you for a long time, and it kills me knowing that you don’t feel the same way"

‘I wanna be your lover.’

‘Baby, I'll hold my breath’

Dean never had a way with words, he sucked ass at the ‘cheesy chick flick’ stuff. That melodrama was never in his books but yet his words came so effortlessly, it flowed fluidly past his lips as he talked about all the things he admired and respected about her. The way it spewed from him, shocked even the man himself but it just came so naturally. It was like something out of a rom-com, he never knew he had it in him.

‘You don't know what you got 'til it's gone, my dear’

‘So tell me that you love me again (tell me that you love me)’

Still holding onto her left hand in his, he reached up with his free hand up to cup her face, his thumb rubbing soft slow circles on her jawline.

His heart thundered in his chest as he looked down into her (e/c) eyes, searching them, watching for any sign of disgust. Expecting another rejection. His eyes flicked down to her lips, then back up to her eyes, before he spoke again, his voice quiet and vulnerable.

“Say something, please"

She sobbed at his confession, it felt too good to be true. Too surreal for her. Still in disbelief at how those words flowed past his tongue. Guilt from Dean sacrificing himself mixing with the guilt over the fact that he believed she didn’t love him back.

She didn’t know how to respond, she couldn’t top that but she knew how to show it. Without speaking, she snaked her arms around his neck, pulling him in, finally connecting his lips with hers in a passionate rough, starved kiss.

‘Again, babe, again’

‘You don't know what you got 'til it's gone, my dear’

‘So tell me that you love me again’

As their lips met, a wave of electricity shot through both their bodies. Dean reciprocated the kiss almost instantly after the initial shock wore off. He let go of her chin, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her close against him as he kissed her back with all the pent-up desire and love he had been holding in for years. Her fingers threaded into his short-cropped ivy-league at the back of his neck, and he deepened the kiss, hungry for more of her.

Y/N melted into his embrace while Dean held her tightly against him as they continued to kiss each other like starved animals. The world around them faded away, leaving only the warmth of her body, the taste of her lips, and the overwhelming emotion coursing through him.

It was real this time. It wasn’t some venom-hopped fantasy dream world. This was real, as real as can be.

Son of a fucking Bitch, I’m kissing Y/N!

Jesus fucking Christ, I’m kissing Dean!

Y/N moaned lightly into the kiss, unable to hold back her desire. Her moan sent shivers down his spine, fueling his desire to claim his territory. His hands roamed over her body, caressing her curves, her imperfect, in her eyes, yet so deliciously perfect, in his eyes, body. Pulling her as close as physically possible. He nipped at her lower lip, gently biting and sucking on it as he explored the sweetness of her mouth with his tongue.

Eventually, Y/N broke the kiss, resting her forehead against his, their breaths mingling in the chilly air. Dean couldn't help but smile, feeling a sense of relief and happiness wash over him, finally being able to express the love he's been holding onto for so long. “At risk of sounding like those cheesy rom-coms you love. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this” Dean murmured, his voice low and rough with a bit of muse.

Y/N chuckled breathlessly at his untimely humor. “I love you too. I’ve always loved you, you big sap” She breathed out, her voice slightly above a whisper, finally returning his words. Meaning every bit of it.

Hearing her say those words sent a wave of emotion through Dean’s body. His heart swelled with joy. He pulled back slightly to look at her, his eyes searching hers. "You... you really mean that?" Dean asked, still trying to wrap his head around the fact that she reciprocated his feelings.

Y/N smiled, shaking her head. Her heart beating out of her chest. “Well I don’t kiss someone like that and not mean it” She sniffled back a chuckle. Dean let out a breathless laugh, a genuine smile spreading across his face. "Fair point," He admitted, chuckling, his voice full of affection.

Y/N smiled softly, her eyes glazing over with tears of happiness. "Of course, I mean it, charming," she replied, her hand caressing his cheek. "I've loved you for as long as I can remember. I love you, Dean Winchester, with every fiber of my being."

Those words sent a shiver through his entire being. His heart skipped a beat before thudding loudly in his chest. A wave of love, happiness, and disbelief washed over him. Dean was shocked. Never in his wildest dreams would he have imagined that she'd feel the same way about him. But here she was, standing in front of him, telling him she loved him as much as he loved her.

"Y/N-" Dean stuttered, his voice thick with emotion. He shook his head slightly, trying to find the words. But before he could speak, she interrupted him with a kiss.

Capturing his lips in another quick, soft kiss before he broke away to brush a strand of hair from her face as their foreheads pressed together. "And here I was thinking you rejected me that day I tried to talk to you about…well…when we almost did this" He sniffled.

“I was here thinking you just wanted to hook up or something. Thinking that you’d never love me the way I love you. How could you possibly think that, charming?” She whispered back. Tears brimming in her eyes again. Seeing the tears well in her eyes, Dean's heart clenched in his chest. He gently wiped away a stray tear with his thumb, his expression softening.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” She croaked painfully. "Because I was afraid," He admitted, ashamed, his voice quieter now. "Afraid that if I confessed my feelings, I'd lose you. Afraid that you wouldn't feel the same way, that I'd ruin the friendship we've built over the years. Just like you said"

She shook her head, “Even if I didn’t feel the same way- Which I do, by the way. You’d never lose me, like I said” She assured him softly. She chuckled lightly at the irony, “God, we really are like a bad romance novel” Y/N shook her head, at how much of a cliche this all has been. Dean felt a weight lift off his shoulders as she spoke, her reassurance easing some of the doubts that had plagued him for so long.

Laughing along with her, "I should've known better," He said, his hand moving to cup her cheek. "You're too stubborn to get rid of that easily." He tried to joke, a grin tugging at the corner of his lips. Y/N chuckled lightly, “You’re darn tootin’, Winchester. You ain’t getting rid of me now or ever” She smiled, laying a kiss on his lips.

Meanwhile all of this is unfolding, Bobby and Sam sat front row as they peered through the creased curtains at his windows in the house, watching intently as the scene between Dean and Y/N played out in the yard.

Words were being tossed back and forth between the two until Dean finally took his hand into hers. The nosey hunters stood in tense silence as Dean spoke softly to her until Y/N finally snatched Dean by his face and took his lips onto hers.

Bobby wore a satisfied grin and a proud smirk. Sam and Bobby shared a wordless high-five, their eyes still trained out the window at the angsty couple.

"Well, I’ll be damned. It's about fucking time," he grumbled, shaking his head. "Those idjits finally figured it out."

Sam chuckled with a scoff, a mix of disbelief and amusement on his face, "I can't believe it," he whispered. "Looks like they finally got their heads out their asses. It only took them a decade or two." Sam chuckled, a grin plastered across his face.

“You think they were watching us?” Y/N chuckled, referring to Sam and Bobby. Dean's face still between the palms of her hand, his light stubble pricking lightly on her soft hands. His own residing on her hips, Dean chuckled along with her, their eyes drifting towards the window where Sam and Bobby stood, their eyes widened, quickly closing the curtain, attempting to act like they weren't peeping.

And slightly sheepish grew on his face. "Knowing those two, they probably saw the whole thing," He said, shaking his head. "Sam's probably ecstatic that I finally grew a pair and told you how I feel.” Dean commented warning a laugh from her, “Yeah, he probably is thinking the same with me” She chuckled, throwing her head back.

His thumbs traced small circles on her hip, she tugged at her bottom lip slightly as he did this. Seeing that movement, his eyes couldn't help but be drawn to her mouth. "You know," He said, his voice lowered. “That was so much hotter than last time” Dean teased, referring to their first kiss as kids. (See ‘First Kiss?’ in the prequel to understand).

Y/N’s mouth fell agape, her cheeks flushed red. “I was hoping you didn’t remember that!” She cackled, throwing her head back. “How could I ever forget it?” He said in a gentle tone, running his thumb along her bottom lip.

Her eyes softened at this until he added, “You were terrible” amusement coated his tone, earning a smack from his girl. He roared a laugh in response, “I was seven! And you were a nervous wreck. It was either I do it or we would’ve sat behind that car all day” She defended with mock annoyance. “I know, Princess. I’m kidding” He chuckled, attaching his lips to her in a soft gentle kiss.

His hands slowly traveled down, slipping into her back pockets, gripping her ass, giving it a soft, yet firm squeeze as their lips moved in sync. A gasp brushed past her lips and onto his. "But there's more I want to do … but only if you’re comfortable with that" He leaned forward, nipping at her neck.

She let out yet another soft gasp, her head tilting slightly to give him better access to her neck. He took advantage of that, continuing to kiss and nibble at her skin, his hands still holding her in place. Her breath hitched at his words and actions, feeling Dean’s soft lips on her neck. A shiver ran down her spine as I continued to nip and kiss her sensitive skin.

"Oh yeah?" She breathed out, her voice wavering slightly. "And what else do you want to do?" He smirked against her skin, his lips hovering over her pulse point. "You really want me to spell it out for you?" Dean whispered, his tongue tracing the length of her jaw. His hands still firmly planted against her ass, giving her another firmer squeeze.

A mischievous yet seductive smile tugged at Y/N’s lips as a straggled moan escaped her throat. His grip on her ass, tightened, teasingly palming at them. He could feel his stomach flutter and his jeans tighten at this. She could feel her panties dampen practically through her jeans as he pulled her closer, his firm body pressing against hers. "I’d love for you to spell it out for me" Y/N murmured, her voice dripping with desire.

The way her voice got all sultry made his pulse quicken, his body reacting to her words as his breath got stuck in his throat. This goddamn woman will eat him alive and he’s counting on it. "Why don’t we start with this, princess?" His voice dropped an octave and with that, he crashed his lips against hers in a deep, passionate kiss. His tongue slipped into her mouth, exploring and tasting her thoroughly.

The nickname ‘princess’ always had a way of making her weak in her knees, especially today. Her body melted against his as their lips moved against each others in a slow, sloppy kiss. His tongue swirled around hers fighting for dominance, tasting her sweetness and exploring her mouth.

She tasted like a mix of tobacco and a hint of a mint from the menthols she smoked. Damn, she tasted like a heavenly-sin and all he wanted was to be even more damned than he already was.

Her knees buckled slightly as he deepened the kiss, wrapping his arms tighter around her waist to hold her up.

He backed up against the Impala’s hood now, pinning her between his body and the car. He continued to kiss her hungrily, his hands roaming over her body. One hand moved up to tangle in her hair, holding her head in place, while the other slid down to her ass, giving it another firm squeeze.

Dean’s hand slid from her ass to her thigh when she lifted her left leg besides his right hip, wrapping it around his waist. The moan that escaped Dean’s mouth was utterly desperate, craving more of the goddess in his arms.

His moan of desperation turned Y/N’s mind to mush. Her stomach fluttered with need. His arousal pressed against her jean clad mound that she was pretty certain was soaked through, earning a tiny wince from her.

"Darlin'," He breathed against her lips, breaking the kiss for just a moment. "As much as I want to take you right here, on the spot, I don't think Sam and Bobby will appreciate it."

Their lips parted as he spoke, his words sending a wave of heat through her body. Despite the desire coursing through her veins, she couldn't help but chuckle at his remark. "Fair point," she conceded, her hands still wandering along his broad shoulders as she lowered her leg back onto the ground.

"And I would like for our first time to be somewhere a little more decent, I'd rather not have them hear me screaming your name." She smirked.

At her words, a low growl escaped his throat, a wolfish grin tugged at the corner of his lips. "Trust me, princess," He replied, his voice thick with desire. "When we do have our first time, I don’t care who hears your screams of pleasure. I want them to know you’re all mine."

Her eyes darkened at his words, the fire in them mirrored the burning need in his. "Is that a promise, Winchester?" She challenged, arching an eyebrow. He leaned in close, their lips just a breath apart, "It’s a damn guarantee, L/N" He retorted, his voice dripping with lust.

"Now, unless you want my hands and mouth all over you right here, I suggest we go inside before I forget that Sam and Bobby are waiting for us." He takes his hands onto hers, finally letting go. “Why don’t we head on over to my safehouse? It’s not far from here if you remember, we can take Sam with us” She suggests.

He took a moment to compose himself, his body still thrumming with arousal. He nodded in agreement, his mind going over her suggestion. He turned away from her to fix his jeans, sticking his hand inside to tuck his arousal away, earning an amused snort from his girlfriend.

"Sure thing, darlin'. Let's just grab the sasquatch and head on over.” He leaned in to plant a quick kiss on her forehead before reluctantly pulling away and heading back towards the house, his fingers intertwined with hers.

_______________________________________________

Authors Note: And with that, we have come to the end of yet another season🥰 DO YOU GUYS LOVE ME AGAIN?! (pun intended LMAO) I hope you all enjoyedddd. I cant wait to hear your lovely thoughts and I’m actually shook rn, I can’t believe it finally happened. Currently in tears😭❤️

Be sure to lmk what you loved and what you hated!

Taglist: @hjgdhghoe @rach5ive @tiggytaylor @star-yawnznn @quarterhorse19

@deangirl96 @bitchykittenconnoisseur @globetrotter28 @hobby27 @mrsjjkwinchester

@juwu-theliciosa @magiccliopleurodon @nesnejwritings @karrah89 @whattheduckisupkyle

@iloveyou2mia @thelittlelightinthedarkness @lmhf1 @littletomboy2 @zigzoggy

@hey-its-zoe @modiddys-blog @thvxr @tommysaxes @cookiemonstermusic258 @elite4cekalyma

@ladykitana90

Xoxo

#dean winchester #supernatural #sam winchester #dean and sam #sam and dean #spn #supernatural fandom #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester x you #Spotify

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onlyfezco · 2 years ago

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Surrender - Fezco

Summary: Something felt off about Custer’s unannounced visit right before Lexi’s play. Thank God you were there when things went down.

Fezco x Reader

Word Count: 1,922

Author’s Note: This is just the season 2 finale without Ashtray dying. I hate the fact that he’s dead and Fez is probably going to jail. I don’t love this one, but I just wanted Ash to not die lol.

Fez always tried to keep you separate from his drug dealer life. You were never over when Mouse and Custer stopped by. You didn’t go with him to see his new supplier. Obviously you knew what he did. You knew his occupation before you two started dating. But the most involved you were, was sitting on the couch next to him at a party while he was dealing. That’s it. The less you knew, the better.

He said it was for your safety, which you respected. Especially after Rue told you what happened at Laurie’s on New Year’s Eve. You were grateful you missed that, but hate that Rue had to be there for it.

All that was why you were confused when Custer stopped by. Of course you knew a little about Custer. You had to with his girlfriend currently living with your boyfriend and his little brother. You remember when you came over the first day after Faye started living with the boys. You saw some pink clothes tossed on the couch and immediately became annoyed and confused. Fezco just told you he owed his supplier a favor and couldn’t say no. You trusted Fez, but you felt he was leaving something out. Knowing it was on a need to know bases, you left it alone. You watched enough law shows to know if you didn’t know, you couldn’t get in trouble in court for not speaking up about something.

Something felt off.

Your hands ran down your flowy black dress with small white flowers printed all over smoothing out the wrinkles. You should be leaving for Lexi’s play now.

“Babe, we should really get going.”

“Aiight, let me go put on my shoes and we can go.” Fez went back to his room.

You looked around and Ashtray was sitting near Custer. The intense look on his face made you have a weird feeling in your stomach. Ash didn’t trust many people. It took him forever to get used to you being around and sharing his brother.

You step into the kitchen with Faye who doesn’t seemed too pleased that her boyfriend came over. Weird.

Faye and you weren’t best friends by any means, but you had grown to like her since she started living at the O’Neal house. You sympathized for her situation. A drug addict with a shitty boyfriend. Nowhere else to go when she got into trouble, but a drug dealing associate of said boyfriend who she didn’t even know. Plus Ashtray who wasn’t making this living situation ideal for any party involved.

“Is everything good,” Fez asked after he looked around the room and could feel the same tension you were feeling.

“Yeah before you go, bro, I really have to talk to you about something,” Custer said.

Fez sighed as he leaned on the counter. “Like what man?”

Custer paused for a beat. “Everything.”

You glanced at the two men super confused. You knew this wasn’t a conversation you should be listening too.

Custer put his cigarette down on the ashtray then turned around to look at Fez. “The fucking cops found Mouse’s body.”

Faye dropped her glass and you bent down to help her pick it up. There was a body. Is that why Fez had a new supplier? You looked at Faye wide eyed. She stared back at you then lifted her finger over her lips in a shhhing motion. Bile rose in your throat. You quickly stood up.

“Uh, Fez, I think I’m gonna go wait in the car,” you said completely interrupting them. Fez nodded having seen Faye’s hint to be quiet, but you knew Ashtray didn’t know. And knowing the boy as well as you did, you needed to get him out of there. “Ash,” you said louder than you intended, “you want to come wait with me?”

Ash’s eyes didn’t leave Custer. He was pissed. You quickly walked over to the boy, only barely hearing Custer’s next words asking Fez if he heard him. “Ash,” you said placing your hand on his shoulder shaking him a little so he’d look at you and get the sense of urgency you felt, “come wait with me.” He looked up at you, anger in his eyes. “Please,” you begged. Desperation so evident in your tone it made him want to do what you said. When he finally looked up at you, you glanced at Custer to make sure he wasn’t looking then copied Faye’s earlier gesture, placing your finger over your lips. Ash squinted at you then nodded in understanding.

You grabbed his hand, something you had never done before, and pulled him along. Fez would handle it. He always handled it. Before you got too far away, you glanced at the coffee table noticing Custer’s phone.

Before you made it out the room, you stopped and whispered to Fez. You didn’t care if Custer saw or thought it was weird.

“He’s recording us on his phone,” you said into your boyfriend’s ear. You pulled away and you both stared at each other for a brief moment before you continued out the living area.

“Y/N,” Ash said stopping in his tracks dropping your hand.

“We gotta go, Ash.”

“I know but look,” he replied pointing to the security screens that showed the areas around the O’Neal home. The cameras weren’t showing anything. Someone moved them.

“Shit... Shit. Shit. Shit.”

“They’re already here,” Ash said softly. You never heard him sound like such a child in all the time that you’ve known him.

“Stay here,” you said, fear in your voice. “I’ll go tell your brother. He’ll know what do.”

Walking back to warn Fez, you heard Faye tell Custer that Laurie killed Mouse. It didn’t take much for you to figure out what actually happened. Mouse was murdered and one of your boys did it. Fez never said anything to you because he didn’t want you involved. You wanted to cry, but now wasn’t the time for tears.

You grabbed Fezco’s hand getting his attention, you voice low as you warned him. “I think the cops are here.”

Fez tilted his head, his jaw tight.

“Take Faye and go wait with Ash at the door.”

Your eyes searched his. “What are you gonna do?”

“Make sure you stay safe.”

“I love you,” you said bluntly. You eyes glossing over with tears.

“I love you,” Fez replied, his tone serious.

You went to the kitchen and grabbed Faye not saying a word. “I think it’s time you leave,” you heard Fez tell Custer.

“What,” Custer asked. “What are we gonna do about the cops?”

“Nothin’, cause I ain’t have anything to do with that. You heard your girl.”

“Are you high,” Custer asked frustrated standing up. That was all you heard as you went to Ash.

Everything finally became too much for you, the tears now falling from your eyes. “Ash, I don’t know what’s about to happen, but promise me, you’ll keep your mouth shut. I have an uncle who’s an attorney, I’ll call him and get y’all out of this.”

Ash shook his head. “I don’t know if an attorney is gonna fix this.”

You grabbed his shoulders, “Yes it will! It has too. We take it day by day. I just need us to survive this. If the cops come in here, there’s no telling what they’ll do. And besides, with what Faye said, all they got is drug charges right?”

Ash wanted to believe you so bad. He really did. But the odds never really worked in his favor. His mom left him at her dealer’s house as payment. Nate had their home raided. He acted too quick, killed Mouse, and left a witness in Custer. But he hated seeing you cry getting dragged into the mess he made. So he just nodded. “Yeah, probably.”

“No, probably! It will! I don’t know anything, I can’t say I saw something I didn’t. There probably isn’t even a body! Cops say they have evidence that don’t really have all the time to get you to talk. That’s why you can’t say anything until my uncle is with you. Do you hear me?”

Ash nodded, praying to a higher power he really didn’t believe in that you were right. “I hear you.”

“Okay,” you said. You pulled him into you for a hug. “I love you. I’ve never said it, but you know that right?”

That’s all it took for Ash to start crying. He hugged you back and replied, “I love you, too.” You kissed the top of his head, closing your eyes hoping this would all go away.

You looked up at Faye while you continued to hold Ashtray. “You did good, Faye. Thank you.”

Faye smiled at you. She wish she had said something sooner, but she was scared. She liked all of you. You treated her better than Custer ever did. Plus, Mouse was an asshole that the world was better off without.

Everything after that happened so quick. Fez came to where you all were and hugged both you and Ash. Squeezing you both tight until he let go to focus on Ash. He leaned down pressing his forehead on Ashtray’s speaking so only he could hear. “We’ll get out of this okay. Just be quiet and keep your head down. We’ll pin this on Laurie if we have too. I got rid of the hammer and the carpet with Mouse’s blood on it. They only have Custer’s word and he’s a dumbass dealer who’d say anything to protect himself.”

Ashtray just nodded holding his brother. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled.

Fez nodded in return. He let go of his brother then turned to you. “I never wanted you in this mess, ma. I’m sorry.”

Your tears wouldn’t stop falling now. “I know,” you replied wrapping your arms around Fez’s neck holding him as tight as you possibly could. “I’m gonna call my uncle who’s a lawyer. I’m gonna get you both out of this. I promise.”

Fez just held you close. He was doubtful. He had a little hope that pinning Mouse’s murder on someone else would work. The police just wanted to put someone away. Didn’t matter if it was him, Custer, or Laurie. And if they pinned it on Laurie, any of her guys who didn’t get arrested with her would come after them.

“I love you, Y/N. Always” Fez said.

“I love you, too,” you replied, pulling back so he could look in your eyes and see how much you meant it. “And I’m not going anywhere. We’re gonna figure this out.”

Fez responded with a hard kiss. His hand cupped the back of your head, his fingers intertwined in your hair. You stayed pressed against him until he stopped. His eyes looking down at you somberly like he was trying to remember every detail of your face.

“We gotta surrender so they don’t come bustin’ in here.” You closed your eyes briefly before nodding. In a matter of 10 minutes your whole world had just gotten turned upside down. Now you were about to walk out of the place that gave you so much solace and peace with your hands up so the police wouldn’t shoot you.

Fez let go of you, stepping away and taking one last look at you and Ash. He walked to door, his hand paused on the door nob as he took a deep breath. He slowly opened the door, immediately putting his hands up.

“We surrender.”

#fezco x reader #fez x reader #fezco one shot #fez fanfic #fezco #euphoria one shot #euphoria fan fiction #euphoria

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ashleyfilm · 4 months ago

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Seeing Clearly - Chapter 3. Joel's House

Please leave comments, I'd love to know your thoughts. And if you feel inclined to reblog, that would be so nice.

Chapter Warnings: cursing, talk of body image, negative comments about body image (not by reader or joel), talk of SA and violence (past), There Will Be Smut, (eventually) Minors - DNI

Characters: Jackson!Joel Miller x F!Reader Plus Size. F!OC was recommended to me since there's a lot of description of her but I'm writing her as You (Reader) so hopefully you can still imagine yourself. Black hair, glasses, tattoos, big body, wears dark clothes, won't stop talking. Joel is tv show Jackson Joel.

Story Summary: Joel just saved your life, begrudgingly. He doesn't know exactly why but he brings you back to Jackson and you ingratiate yourself into his very small circle and his life. This takes place after season 1 of TLOU and season 2 doesn't exist in my brain because no.

Chapter Summary: You enter Joel's house for the first time and get to know him a little bit.

Thank you to @saradika-graphics for the book line divider. :)

Chapter 1 Here Chapter 2 Here

Chapter 3. Joel's House

You finally catch up to Joel as the two of you approach a surprisingly lovely two-story house. Is that a front porch swing? As you get to the door, Joel stops so abruptly you knock into his back. Oh, his back, it’s so big, and he’s taller than you and you smell the pine, musk and vanilla, maybe. And it’s intoxicating. He smells so good. Your eyes flutter closed and breathe him in. You’re startled back to earth by his low, stern drawl, “Look, this is my house and you’re a guest, so no wanderin’ around, no snoopin’, don’t take things that aren’t yours and stay outta my way.” Something about Joel giving you orders makes you feel a slight pull beneath your belly button. Something to unpack later, there. “Aye, aye!” You respond and he does one of his signature sighs, side-eyeing you and finally opens the door.

It's so cozy in here, it’s a home. A real home. There’s a set of stairs just to the right when you walk in the door, and the living room is to the left, a couch that looks more comfortable than anything you’ve slept on in decades. There’s a fireplace and on top a beautiful drawing of a black horse with a mane like your own hair, silky black with streaks of gray. Can Joel draw? No way, maybe Ellie did it. Then you see the little carvings. A moose made of dark mahogany wood; a wolf made of a lighter almost ivory shade. Okay, that’s got Joel written all over it. You don’t know how it’s possible you missed it when you walked in, maybe because it’s so foreign to you now but there’s a TV in the corner of the room on a tv stand. You gasp, holding a hand to your chest, “Does that work?”

When you turn to look at Joel, you realize he’s been watching you intently, observing as you take everything in. And there’s something in his gaze that makes your skin flush, like he’s proud to show this home to you. He shakes his head almost to clear his mind and come back to reality. “Yeah, we have some movies on tape we can watch from the library.” And that’s what does it. You start crying, fat wet tears down your cheeks. You can’t help it. You don’t sob, it’s just water, silently leaking down your face. “Darlin’ hey, you’re okay.” Joel comes to put a hand on your shoulder, and you don’t even realize the pet name he’s just called you, much to his relief. Voice shaky, “I’m sorry, Joel, I don’t know what’s come over me. I just never thought I would see a movie ever again in my life. I know it might seem trivial or whatever, but I went to school for filmmaking and wanted to be a director all my life and before everything, before, this was my life.” You look in his eyes now and again you’re shocked by the fucking depth of emotion they carry. He doesn’t want to show you, but his eyes do it anyway.

“Ain’t nothing trivial about it, Ash. I guess I should tell you the town has weekly movie nights, there’s popcorn and a big screen and everything.” You gasp, the tears have finally stopped, and you wipe them away, and you smack Joel on the arm, “Shut up, Joel, oh my god!” He can’t stop the chuckle that leaves his mouth, “I promise, on my life. This week its Jurassic Park, I just found that one on patrol last week.” “I LOVE JURASSIC PARK.” You’re yelling now. “Alright, alright, we’ll go, its Friday evenin’ – um, 3 days from now, it’s Tuesday, today.” Joel says, smiling just a little. You look at him now, and he looks softer, you think you see the brother of Tommy, the dad to Ellie, and maybe he could be a friend to you. “You’ll go with me?” You ask meekly. Joel shakes his head, smirking a little, “Yeah, yeah, don’t make a big deal of it. Now, its late and you’re sure as shit exhausted so head upstairs, your room’s the door on the left. Mine’s on the right, MINE, meanin’ its off limits to you. Maria left you some clothes and things in the room you might need, the showers got towels and everything ya need in there. Get a shower and get some sleep.” You nod, smiling at how he’s taking care of you without even realizing it. He’s such a dad. You walk to the stairs and kick your worn old boots off and leave them by the door. As you make your way up the stairs, you stop and look at Joel, “Thank you.” “It’s nothing,” he replies, not looking at you. “No, Joel,” you wait till he finally meets your gaze, “you saved my life, and you brought me to heaven on earth as far as I’m concerned...thank you.” His lip ticks up in a grin and you see it, the dimple in his cheek and it takes your breath away. Well, you’re officially fucked. “Get some sleep, Ash.” Your cheeks flush and you continue up the stairs. You’ll do anything to see that dimple again and as many times as possible after.

Warning: talk of body image, negative comments about body image (not by reader or joel), talk of SA and violence (past).

You wake up early the next morning, the sun shining in through the window of your small, incredible, beautiful bedroom. YOUR BEDROOM with a bed and a door and a lock and a window that’s not broken. You slept so well, clean with a full stomach, in the most comfortable bed with sheets and pillows, multiple pillows. Hugging your curves and alleviating your back. You could just lay here for days, but you’re restless and you’re wondering what you did in a past life to end up here like this. You don’t think you deserve it. You sit up and stretch, the sleep shirt you’re wearing revealing your plush tummy, you grab for your trusty glasses on the nightstand and your shorts that ride up on your thick thighs and round ass. Even in the apocalypse with little food and a lot of walking, you’ve held onto your weight for the most part. Thicker than most others. Some strange phenomena. People you’ve run into during your journey over the last 20 years have questioned it. Accused you of stealing food, being lazy around the Nashville QZ. Men in the QZ ogling you, their wives or girlfriends blaming you, calling you a slut. Busting your lip open with their fists after catching you in an alley alone. Raiders telling you they haven’t seen a woman like you in years, calling you a fat bitch while assaulting you. But you never turned that in on yourself, you were happy with your body, she kept you alive. She survived everything. Your mind on the other hand…well that’s a different story.

You decide that there is something you can do to try and balance the scales. It’s not much but everyone loves breakfast, right? So, you pad down to the kitchen and start cooking, eggs and bacon. They have bacon here. Are you dead? Is this even real? You even see a loaf of sourdough bread, okay you’re making toast, obviously. You get to work and soon you notice Ellie and Joel come in from different sides of the kitchen. Oh Joel. He’s in flannel pajama pants that ride low on his hips and a thin t-shirt that strains to keep from tearing on his beautiful biceps. You thought maybe you made it up, maybe you were sleep deprived and starving and your eyes tricked you. No, nope, he really is incredible. “MMMMMM, hell yes, breakfast!” Ellie exclaims as she goes to pour herself some juice from the fridge. Joel grunts, “Who said you could go through the fridge and start cookin’.” You look at him with guilt in your eyes about to apologize when Ellie saves you, “Oh, stuff it, old man, she made you breakfast, say thank you, mind your manners. Isn’t that always what you tell me?” She winks at you, and you bite back the smile on your face. “Uh, thank you.” Joel coughs out. “Okay, sit down you two, I just have to plate the eggs and we’ll be – FUCK!” You scream as you grab the piping hot handle of the pan the eggs are sizzling in. Clanging it back on the stovetop.

In a flash, Joel is at your side, holding your left wrist and looking at the long red burn mark on your palm. He walks you over to the sink and turns on the tap of cold water, placing your burning palm underneath the stream. “It’s okay,” he coos, as you audibly wince, “You gotta keep it under here for a good long while to help keep it from scarrin’ too bad.” You’re not looking at your hand anymore, you’re looking at Joel. “How do you know that?” you ask timidly. He doesn’t take his eyes or his hand off your injured one, “Parents pick that kind of stuff up.” And you know he’s not referring to Ellie, but you don’t press. Speaking of Ellie, she’s got a huge, stupid grin on her face watching this interaction while scarfing down bacon. Still quiet you say only to Joel, “I haven’t cooked in two decades, I forgot the handle heats up.” He finally finds your eyes not expecting you to be looking right into his, he startles like a wild animal and drops your wrist. You instantly become colder without his touch.

He speaks, gruff and a bit louder now, “Well, watch it next time and go sit down, I’ll get the eggs.” You sit down at the table next to Ellie in what will soon become your designated seat, and Joel comes to sit beside you after dolling out the eggs. Ellie makes to grab your wrist, slowly, making sure you’re okay with it, “Can I see?” You nod and hold out your burned palm, “EWWW, its gonna scab, and then its gonna peel, can I see it when it starts to peel?” Joel about to take a bite of the eggs, “Ellie, can you not, tryin’ ta eat here. Ugh.” Ellie starts to giggle and so do you. Then you hear Joel moan, and you look over to see his eyes closed and notice he’s savoring the eggs you cooked him. You try to contain your squeak of excitement but fail and his eyes flick open to you like he’s been caught. “Okay, okay, I’ll give it to you, you make way better eggs than me, and no shells, good job.” Ellie watches you as you smile into your glass of water and Joel as he smirks just a little showing his dimple and she starts placing bets in her head on which one of you is going to fold first.

#ashleyfilm #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal plus size reader #joel miller plus size reader #joel miller #joel tlou #the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #joelxf!oc #Seeing Clearly #tlou

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hdusa · 7 months ago

Note

that was my first time watching a lifesteal stream in like 6 months i dont know what is going on in season 5 at all . the red sky was kinda awesome. guns were scary. i hope u kill more people soon ^_^ will be trying 2 tune in more - @renchant

I can try to summarize the entire season in like 3 paragraphs it’s going to be so terrible and long I’m so sorry watch me do it here we go

So basically… lifesteal season 5 begins…. There’s a group called the PMC that consists of MinuteTech LeoWook and ClownPierce and since they’re all big strong men they beat up every other team on the server. Eventually the PrinceZam + Pangi pirate team group up with Gucci Gang (Bacon Parrot Mapicc) to beat them up because they’re really strong and scary. Eventually Clown stops logging on so they feel the need to form a new team called the Phantoms with Vitalasy Jumper and Reddoons and they go around jumping people by staying logged out and then all logging in at the same time after someone’s lured to a location. It got them a PrinceZam kill but they failed against Mapicc and Bacon. Tons of fights happen that are just PMC vs Gucci Gang + Me or LaLa Legion (Spoke Ash Ro Planet) vs Us or whatever. Eventually new members get added, Squiddo Pentar Jepex Wemmbu. There’s a gay wedding between Parrot and Ashswag. Squiddo kills the entire server at a birthday party. I made 200 backup maxed out armor sets. Midmystic makes Pangi and I an awesome pirate base and lastly a chunk of the server lowkey stop logging on.

Because of the void left by the players that are now gone (Parrot, Vitalasy kinda, Reddoons, Poafa, Woogie, Vort3x etc) Mapicc and I have no choice but to find a way to make things awesome again. We build a void trap at spawn and try to lure Minute and Planet over, successfully killing Planet (this is ok because he’s a 20 heart monster this season btw!!) Bacon joins us and decides we need two extra members so we invite Pentar and JumperWho as well. Together we formed a team called The Abyss, a group of players that want to revive the server by destroying it. By making ourselves the big bads of the server every time people logged on their goal was to kill us so that we’d stop making our void hole at spawn bigger. They tried other things like filling the hole with water and obsidian but those all got fixed relatively fast. One of the things they did was find my secret base and steal all 200 of my armor sets. This made me really mad so I destroyed the entire PMC base. After months of constant fighting over this big dumb hole to the void at spawn eventually we come up with an end goal. We were going to turn the entirety of spawn island into void. While working on this insanely large project we get jumped and after like 5 battles where Planet just keeps dying but his teammates live, he bans himself in the void hole. Before doing so he asks what our goal is so I told him activity, and he says “well in that case I guess in a way I’ve beat you”. This was like cold asf so we immediately switch gears deciding we need to make our plan way awesomer and cooler so we add a puzzle for them to solve!! It’s super long and if they couldn’t finish it in 7 days the entirety of spawn would be turned to void. Our team immediately got to work running big bedrock break machine and cleaning out layer after layer. However, as this is all happening Wemmbu Squiddo and 4CVIT reveal that they have a massive canon that will blow up literally EVERYTHING on the server unless we give them 50 hearts. They blows up 4Cs entire beautiful base to show they’re not joking around. Minute and his group are able to find the canon and break it saving the server but for a moment the entire server was united against Wemmbu and his team. The Abyss goal was completed before our final project even began which sucked, but we kept moving forward. To get people interested Minute (temporarily) added Rekrap2 Back To The Server!!!! He was here to help them finish the puzzle and after a week of us racing to void everything while they solve our puzzles, it was over and they had won. The 5 of us now had to jump into the void but that’s when JumperWho revealed she had been a mole the whole time. For 3 months of constant work on the void hole, she was betraying us. Relaying everything to Minute and his team. Filled with rage Mapicc decided to bomb her base but ended up with Clown Leo Minute Jumper and potentially more on him. I came to help but I wasn’t ready to fight Jumper, somebody I’d been allies with for 3 months. I managed to escape but I couldn’t believe it. Afterwards Pentar also left our team leaving just Mapicc Bacon and I.

The next paragraph is basically everything that’s happened since so basically the last month or so. To fix the lack of order on the server players could now run for God! Mapicc, Minute, Squiddo and 4CVIT/Reddoons decided to run. Simultaneously Branzy was now working on a carnival which was really cool! During one of the games I rigged it so that Jumper would die which was silly revenge but then for serious revenge me and Mapicc tried jumping her. Unfortunately she got Minute to save her leading to us losing badly. Afterwards the presidential god stuff starts taking priority and to campaign we ask a bunch of people to vote for us. In the end we came 2nd place, and Pentar as well as Pangi voted against Mapicc. Pentar made sense since he never said he would vote Mapicc, but Pangi had quite literally betrayed all of our trusts by voting for Squiddo. Also Minute came dead last despite helping everyone on the server regear and also saving them from void and the canon which is hilarious. The winners were 4C and Reddoons who instead of actually running themselves chose to give their presidency to CaptainSparklez! It takes him a while to join and during that time period to fill the lack of things going on Mapicc and I start an all out war against Jumper. It started with a silly spar against MinuteTech that ended up turning into a 2v2 against Jumper as well. We got them to run the first time around but the 2nd time we just lost badly. The next day Jumper said she’d deliver stone from Vitalasys old base to Midmystic so we hid in Vitalasys base all day long. It was taking a while so I changed my discord pfp and name to match Mids and got her to log on 😭😭. Once she showed up we killed her. Minute logged on and she ended up coming back but we escaped with me on the brink of death. Because of this they were angry angry at us but we didn’t care we wanted to make them more mad. We started base hunting and found Minutes somewhat old base for the anti abyss people. While searching the base Minute showed up so Mapicc got there and we 2v1d him. During the fight we spawned a wither in the base bombing the area and revealing a third of the 200 armor sets I had stolen from me during the void arc!!! Eventually Jumper showed up so we decided to run away taking our win. But after this we had another fight where they jumped us at my base and we ended up losing after an extremely long and hard fought battle. Before this I forgot to mention but Bacon Mapicc and I brainstormed a team name as well as an end goal, SPOILERS NO LIFESTEAL MEMEBRS READ BEYOND THIS!!!!

STOP IT! DO NOT READ AHEAD LIFESTEAL MEMBERS!!!

Essentially we wanted to reset the server to how it was on day one, breaking apart every team and then resetting every area back to how it looked on day one. With this goal in mind I realized we’d need to actually be able to kill people so I needed to get past being on 9 hearts. 4C/Red made hearts literally uncraftable so I had to kill. This segment is really cool there’s a 10 or 20 minute clip of everything that happens and if I tried to explain it I wouldn’t do it any justice but I’m sure somebody will link it below. Anyway after the awesome clip moment I’m evil now so I try to kill Pangi. I lead him to our old day one base and get him to help me repair it but he is wayyy too sus of me. I eventually muster up the courage to block off the bases exits and ask him over and over why he voted Squiddo, as this was supposed to be revenge for that. However, MinuteTech logs on and arrives at the base leading to them 2v1ing me but I end up escaping. We scream at each other before I leave to set up a new base. Later that night Pentar calls with Mapicc and I to join our team. Thanks to him I’m basically able to fully regear myself after losing almost everything to all the fights we had with Minute and Jumper. I end up on 12 hearts by this point and I think that’s most the shenanigans wrapped up, all that’s left is the captain sparklez stuff which this specific asker has already seen I think. For anyone else I personally believe this should be vod watched!! Up to you of course but I’m sure someone else on here would be willing to summarize that specific event sometime.

I spent an hour writing this on my phone before bed and I can’t believe it took this long. I thought it’d be shorter. Sorry!

#hello it is me princezam #sorry for making this so damn long #I didn’t know I was evil #this was so unprompted too Lmaoo #My mistake!#actual ask hijacking

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pascallatte · 2 years ago

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Mando's Lover?

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Actress!reader

Summary: The Mandalorian interview but why are you included? (read to find out 😉)

Date: August 2019

Taglist: @benonlinear, @t-stark35, @heyitsme-2, @elleeeee21, @holmesstrange, @tagakalat, @flyestvenustrap, @oldermenaremyreligion, @cherryred444, @avengersheart, @guacala, @pukka-latte, @hobiismyhopeu, @lilvampirina, @ilovehotdadsandshit

A/N: AAAAA we're almost entering my favourite part of the series, but, I might post some throwbacks before we head to that though so stay tuned and like always, enjoy!! also kind of a late post but you know. hehe

Series Masterlist

The pair are seen on the red carpet during this year’s D23 Expo on The Mandalorian, which was to be released three months from now.

“Ok I'm gonna recreate your reaction to-being-casted celebration,” the interviewer, Ash, said as she shook hands with Pedro. She recreated his celebratory reaction making Pedro watch as she continued.

“That’s right. It was- it was a three-act event react play. Yeah, it was like “Oh thank you thank you”.. pass out,” He said also reenacting with an exaggerated crying look on his face, clearly having fun at what was happening.

She brings the mic closer to her to ask him her second question, “But can you walk me through actually finding out you were cast as The Mandalorian.” Pedro who was once looking at her intently, turned to look downwards remembering how that day went.

“Well I got a call and the actual words were “Jon Favreau wants to talk to you about something Star Wars” and so I said absolutely and I went out to meet him at his offices in Playa Vista and he invited me into a room where he introduced me to Dave Filoni and in this room, it was wall-to-wall, immaculate illustrations of this series which is everything Star Wars-”

He continues to share his precious moments before the final revelation, “-And so being a Star Wars fan myself I was like, “oh what’s this” and “oh I remember that” and “what are you gonna do here” and “what do you want me to do?”” Pedro rambles on about asking them what creature, robot, or whatever role they wanted him to audition for before taking a deep breath.

“-and they looked confused and basically pointed to the- this incredible like silhouette of The Mandalorian. He said you’re the, you’re The Mandalorian. So yeah that’s why I- that’s why I sort of died inside of joy.”

Nodding at his response Ash looks at him,” Who was the first person you ever told when you got the job? Since the role became like a very important one for you.”

Scratching the back of his neck, “Well, y/n was picking me up from Jon’s place, so naturally, I told her fir-actually, I freaked out on her. I kept blabbering on things I can’t even remember you know, it must be the adrenaline I felt at that moment. And then- just then did I call my sister, who is a big Star Wars fan, saying how I’m a part of the huge franchise that she loves and now we’ve done and are about to release the first season, it makes me really happy.” Ending his response with a content smile.

“How could you not? I mean, you mentioned you were a Star Wars fan, so what’s your earliest Star Wars memory? Do you remember like-“ Ash inquired once again, wanting to know more about him and his experience as an interviewer.

Pedro enthusiastically blurted out,” I saw Star Wars- I saw episode four in the movie theatre. I was very young so I don’t remember the experience of being in the theatre for it as well as I do the empire strikes back which is burned into my childhood imagination and I remember like three attempts to get tickets for return of the Jedi and getting my heart broken every time because it was sold out, and then finally getting the tickets and literally you know like staring at the poster being like I’m finally seeing this movie so it was highly present in my childhood. All the toys you know and all the stories yeah.”

“And now you’re in it,” Ash said, seemingly into his history with Star Wars.

Agreeing with her, “And now I’m in it. it’s weird, leading the series”

“Now, back to being an avid Star Wars watcher. What was your reaction when you were first introduced to your now-girlfriend, Y/n L/n, who played the character Sabe in the phantom menace?"

Pedro looks at her with a look that he knows what she was up to and decides to keep it short, "Yeah well like I knew it was her when we first met but I didn’t like barging into her space telling her that I’ve watched her in Star Wars and loved it because that would be weird coming from this guy you’ve never met before. But now, I can say that we’re now also together in another galaxy."

"Did you ever think you would ever meet her in person or like be with her all those years ago?"

Crossing his arms, thinking for a moment, "I didn’t really well- but to start it off I didn’t even think I would be able to meet her in any way, since she was like in the spotlight already at such a young age so I didn’t really think about it. That was until we got introduced that is and it was one of the best moments in my life," finishing it off with a shy smile.

“That’s sweet, do you think we’ll ever see Y/n as part of your series, The Mandalorian?”

“Good question but we haven’t thought about it really. But with the number of times she’s been on set they should’ve made a character just for her don’t you think?” Pedro said laughing. “Last question, what role from The Mandalorian would you think y/n would fit in if she were to be cast?” she quickly stated as their time's almost up.

Pedro gave her a teasing knowing look, “Ummm Mando’s lover, no I'm joking. But maybe someone in the ranks, probably not a Mandalorian cause she'll look-" he makes a tiny sign from his hands, laughing at himself, "-wearing the armour. Maybe a Jedi, we don’t know really, she can play herself actually. She’ll take whatever they give her.”

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal x actress!reader #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal imagine #pedro pascal x female reader #the mandalorian #the mandalorian s3

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heyclickadee · 6 months ago

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A couple things:

1. The thing is, I actually don’t really think we’re done with the bad batch, for a variety of reasons. There’s too much unresolved, for one thing, and “end of this chapter with these characters” is not how anyone says, “We’re never touching this again.” I really do think we’re getting an immediate follow up with more of a focus on Rex and Echo, but that the rest of the bad batch will still pop in from time to time, giving all of them a chance to round out the last little bit of their stories and character arcs—because they are all just a little bit undercooked. (For example: Crosshair doesn’t even get lines after Tantiss, and the last thing he says about himself takes him from implicitly to explicitly suicidal. The hug is beautiful and cements his place as part of the family, but we never get a moment where he forgives himself or no longer believes that he deserves to die. His redemption arc is magnificent, but it needs that last little push to feel fully resolved).

And, for another variety of reasons, I actually do still think we’ll be getting Tech back in one way or another. So much of what is left unresolved in TBB forms a chalk outline around a Tech-shaped void, for one. The writers aren’t committed enough to have come up with a decent reason for why he had to go in the first place—stakes does not cut it and is actively undermined by never treating it like a character death—for another. They were, at the very least, not committed enough to actually kill him. Tech is the only character in a show that loves making us watch who doesn’t die on screen, and the only one who’s “death” moves nothing forward and is never treated like an actual death. And we have no definitive proof he actually died, for another. (Even if he was CX-2—CX-2 got “killed” two other times on screen and popped up five minutes later each time like a daisy. If you do that you’re going to have to burn the body and scatter the ashes for me to think he’s dead, impalement or no. Besides, you can’t definitively kill a main character via subtext. You still have to be clear and direct.) And Tech has too many callback lines and potential survival foreshadowing for someone to never tug on them at some point, for another. You’d have to kill me to keep me from doing something with, “Better late than dead.” Basically, tl:dr, I think Tech will come back someday, whether they have plans or not.

Because I can’t really get on board with the idea that The Bad Batch was just always badly written. I can’t agree with that. It was never perfect, of course, but it was always remarkably well written and thematically consistent for 46 straight episodes and then tripped on the chalk of the finish line. Besides, I’ve never seen bad writing that was perfectly set up amazing writing if all they did was one simple thing—ie, follow through with what they set up. It’s not that the ending is bad, it’s that it’s bad in this particularly insane way. If it was just normal bad, I’d have dropped The Bad Batch like a rock by now and done my best to forget I’d ever watched it. But because it’s bad like this—basically, a non-ending that resolves nothing but Hunter’s Cut Lawquane arc, Rampart (which was good, actually), and the problem of Hemlock continuing to draw breath (which was just the last major obstacle in Hunter’s Cut Lawquane arc, so it’s not even a separate thing) and answers NO questions—I’m obsessed.

And I can’t get behind the idea that The Bad Batch ending is like this and that we got shorted a Tech return because they got shorted a season. I’ve seen many serialized animated shows that got shorted a season or more, and what every one of them did was cut out everything they could in the middle so that they could get to the resolution they wanted, squash the originally planned last season’s arcs into the actual last season—not leave those arcs undone and the resolution out. The only way them being shorter a season works as an explanation for all of this is if the creative team found out season three was the last at the same time we did. And even then, the solution there would have been to take out five minutes of fight scene and replace it with five minutes of resolving everything in the short and stupid but still THERE way.

For example: Give Wrecker and Crosshair one line each after Tantiss that tells us what they’re going to do. Unmask CX-2 as Tech after spearing him (or don’t spear him) and add one line where Hunter says he’s recovering and that it’ll be a long road, but they won’t give up on him. Or! If you don’t want to bring Tech back in the short and stupid but there way, add a line to the epilogue where Hunter tells Omega, “I see Tech when I look at you sometimes. I don’t want to lose you the way we lost him,” which seems like a no brainer, or, “Tech would have been so proud of you,” which is absolutely a no-brainer if you actually want to close things out for Tech. Tech would still be gone, but at least it’d be resolved, and that’s all short, simple stuff you could add to the very last episode to make it feel finished. If you’re shorted a season or even a few episodes, you cut everything that doesn’t matter, you do whatever you can to get your story resolved—unless you have somewhere else to put it. Which, given how open Star Wars canon is and how heavily it relies on recontextualization, is a very real possibility here.

What I think may have happened here is that The Bad Batch ended up being the first part of a longer story that had to be artificially cut in half. Whether it was always planned that way, whether it was something that unexpectedly happened partway through the production of season three, or a secret third option (the creative team set things up to to be resolved in three seasons but always wanted to do a longer version, but the longer version (in the form of another show) didn’t get greenlit until they’d already written most of season three, so all the payoff got schlorped over to that follow up show while the payoff stayed in this one, leaving us, the audience, with this incredibly unsatisfying mess of a finale in the meantime while whoever is in charge of announcing shit at Lucasfilm doesn’t see the problem). Put a pin in CX-2, slap something that looks like a happy ending on the rest, resolve nothing, do it all in the next thing.

(Slight sidebar: If it turns out that the reason we didn’t get Tech back is because something went horrifically wrong during the writer’s strike—basically, the finale got hit with extreme budget cuts and the script patched by AI—I think we’d still get Tech back. Tech in the first two seasons was something of a writer blorbo, and no one is leaving their blorbo dead over that. That’s a good way for them to bring back their blorbo and have that blorbo murder the hell out of a thinly disguised CEO insert.)

And if that’s what we’re looking at—well, okay. I can see wanting to give certain things (especially a Tech return) more time. If this is what’s happening I actually think it will be more satisfying in the long run, from a story perspective, anyway. I’ll be able to live with that.

That said….

2. If that’s the case—if what we’re looking at is a story artificially split in half one way or another and we are getting a Tech return and the rest of the resolution eventually in an immediate follow up, something that will ultimately work really well in the long run—that doesn’t mean I think it works now. Right now, it’s awful, from every angle. We don’t know for sure that anything else is coming, it makes for a deeply unsatisfying story right now because the “ending” we have is all we have to go on, and it’s unnecessarily stressful for most everyone but especially the autistic fans who relate to Tech.

And the thing is, if Tech were neurotypical? I don’t think we’d really be question the idea that he could still come back eventually. He’s a clear writer favorite to the point that they basically gave him the entirety of season two, except the two Crosshair episodes, great lines and moments in other character’s episodes, and they apparently liked using him so much that either CX-2 was Tech or they physically couldn’t stop themselves from writing and animating Tech in a season he wasn’t in. Killing off one of the writer faves and the fan favorite in order to bring them back later is something that happens. But it’s something that hits differently when that writer and fan favorite is also the only canonically autistic character in the franchise.

Which. Is I think where we run into a problem. You see, I never really got the impression that the creative team ever thought of Tech as The Autistic One. Does that mean I think the didn’t write him as autistic? Of course not—they absolutely did, and did so intentionally. What I mean is that that wasn’t the sum total or even the primary way in which they thought of him, otherwise I think we would have ended up with a terrible Sheldon-Cooper-esque. Instead, the Tech they wrote, and the Tech we got, is just a guy. A really amazing guy who’s noticeably different and autistic AF, but treated like any other character. And on the one hand, great! I know people have a lot of different ideas about this, but I personally want writers to deal with autistic characters that way—to just write us like we’re people. And if what they’re doing is bringing Tech back later and on a longer timeframe than what we expected—also great. It means that all the ambiguity, hinting, and complete and total lack of processing or closure makes sense, because that’s how you write a fakeout death. That’s textbook how you write a fakeout death. But—but—

The flip-side of just treating Tech like any other character and, perhaps, playing a long game with “killing” him off and bringing him back later like someone would do with a fan favorite, if that’s what they’re doing, is that you end up in the situation that we’re in right now. The interim situation where it feels like Tech’s sacrifice was never given the weight it needed to feel final or meaningful, where we’re given no closure and no opportunity to let go, where we DON’T know if anything is coming next even if we do get hints, where Tech got dropped, where nothing makes sense, and where the autistic fans in the audience who relate to Tech feel like Star Wars kicked them in the face and told them that they don’t belong here.

So.

I want this to be a long game, and I do think this could, one, be a situation where they team is having to work around some kind of corporate shenanigans to play that long game, and; two, could end up being a fantastic story that I love even more than the version I wanted.

But even if I’m right and that is the case, I also hate that this is where we’re at in the here and now, that it’s hurt people as badly as it has, and think that they should never do anything like this again, because the game stopped being fun a long time ago.

tl;dr: I don’t think we’re done yet, I think this is part of a longer story, I think we’ll get Tech back at some point whether it was planned or not, but I also hhhaaaaaatte the current situation and think it’s been mishandled.

#the bad batch #tech lives #no I really do think they’ll bring him back eventually #if only because no one actually seems happy about this #and also it’s the smart business move #does that mean I think where we’re at is okay?#nnnnnnooooooooooo #this still sucks #if we do get him back I swear I’m writing another letter to Lucasfilm #‘great! love it! love seeing him back! NEVER DO THIS AGAIN.’

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incandescentlysomething · 8 months ago

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Lady of the Ashes: Chapter 6

House of the Dragon Season 1

Aemond x TargaryenOC

Chapter Word Count: 4893

She was his everything… For her…he would do anything.

From the moment of her birth, Aemond Targaryen swore himself to the protection of his niece Aelinor Velaryon. As the two grew up inseparable, they find themselves entangled in the Dance of Dragons, battling to stay together even as their families try to pull them apart.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Cross posted on A03

Let me know what you think!

Masterlist A03

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 P.1 P.2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

It was nearly noon when Aelinor awoke, the sun peeking through her curtains and disturbing her peace. She had lain awake for several hours after her night with Aemond, unable to think of anything else but him. How he had held her hand, how close they had been to kissing. It seemed almost childish to be thrown out of sorts by something as simple as a kiss, and yet she was unable to push it from her mind. Alas, when she had finally fallen asleep, it had been a deep one.

Someone was pounding on her door. “Aelinor! Mother wants you.”

It was Jace, and he took her answering groan as permission to enter the chamber. “Why are you still asleep?”

“I’m not asleep, am I?” She rolled over, wincing as she stretched her muscles. “What does Mother want?”

Jace poked her foot through the covers. “We need to begin getting ready for the festivities.”

“We?”

“Well, you do. You have to do your hair and…other things.” He looked genuinely baffled, like he couldn’t fathom what kinds of preparations a woman might have to do to get ready for a royal banquet and ball.

Aelinor heaved herself out of bed with a sigh, accepting the heavy dressing gown Jace handed her to cover her nightgown.

“Is she up yet?” Luc poked his head through the door. “Oh, good morning Aelinor. Or should I say afternoon?”

She wrinkled her nose at him, knotting the dressing gown at the waist.

“Why are you so tired?” Jace asked.

Aelinor shrugged. “Not used to the bed, I guess.”

“I, for one, found the bed and chambers quite comfortable.” Jace said, moving out of her way as they moved into the corridor. “Far less drafty than Dragonstone.”

She searched for an excuse in her sleep-addled brain, unable to come up with anything believable.

“We stayed up late playing cards,” Luc said. “Aelinor wouldn’t let us go to bed until she beat me.”

She thought her younger brother a grateful look, appreciating that he was covering for her.

“And did she?” Jace asked, believing the excuse.

“No, she gave up.” Luc laughed.

Aelinor yawned loudly. “You’re both impossible.”

They stepped into the main room of their family’s chambers, and were immediately met by a throng of people. Maids bustled to and fro, unpacking garments from bags, some already set up with needles and thread to make necessary alterations, and others opening boxes of jewels. Aelinor held her dressing gown a little tighter to her body.

“Aelinor!” Her mother was seated at the small breakfast table, watching two of the maids entertain the small children. “Are you just waking up now?”

“Yes, Mother. I feel rather like the walking dead this morning.”

“Why? Are you ill?” Rhaenyra reached out to touch her daughter’s forehead. “You don’t feel warm.”

She shook her head. “I just stayed up too late.”

“Losing at cards.” Jace teased.

Rhaenyra smiled, squeezing Aelinor’s hand. “As long as you’re well. Did you have a good evening, card games aside?”

Aelinor hated lying to her mother. Part of her just wanted to tell her the truth, admit where she had been and who she was with. Her mother had always humored her more rebellious side, and likely wouldn’t be as furious as she was imagining. Not to mention, things would be infinitely worse if her mother found out from whoever had been spying on them in the library.

But still Aelinor was not able to admit everything. “I had a good evening. It’s nice to be back.”

“It is.” Rhaenyra agreed. “Now, we must begin getting you ready. Starting with that hair.” She teasingly pulled on a string of Aelinor’s tangled mane. She had gone to sleep without braiding it, and it was looking quite unkempt.

A maid was waved over, and Aelinor dropped into the seat opposite her mother, reaching for a half-empty plate of biscuits. She chewed slowly as the maid ran a brush through her hair, combatting the tangles one by one.

“The fashion seems to be to wear one’s hair up now,” She said absently. “Perhaps with some braiding throughout?”

Rhaenyra gave her a small smile. “I think it’s best that you wear your hair down, darling.”

“Why?” Aelinor couldn’t see how dancing all evening, getting all sweaty and letting the scent of smoke and cooked meats seep into her hair, could possibly be a good thing.

But then she saw her mother’s eyes dart toward the couch, where Jace was polishing a spot off one of his boots, and she understood. In this fight for her brother’s legitimacy, she was her mother’s best weapon, and her hair was the most obvious way to wield it.

“Unbraided, then.” She acquiesced.

Rhaenyra nodded. “Oh, but we have a circlet for you, darling. You will look beautiful.”

Aelinor offered her mother a sincere smile. It had been years since they had had the opportunity to prepare for an event of this size, and it reminded her of far simpler times.

“I assume you have a dress for me, as well. Can I see it?” She winced as the maid yanked on a stubborn knot behind her ear.

Rhaenyra grinned. “Even better, I have three. We shall have to try them on to see which suits best.”

“Good gods,” Lucerys threw his head back in complaint.

“And you boys shall remain here,” Rhaenyra said quickly. “To help your sister choose.”

Jace glared at his brother. “Is Driftmark worth this, Brother?”

*********************************************************

Aemond was called to his mother’s chambers only an hour before the ball. He had been awake with the dawn, throwing himself into training bouts to while away the time and distract his mind. The night with Aelinor had been more than he had ever dreamed of, and waking up just to remember that she was betrothed to Jacaerys of all people, and that he would have to attend this cursed ball in the evening was enough to drive him into a fury.

None of the visiting nobles were willing to spend the morning on the training grounds, and so he grabbed several young squires and put them through their paces while he worked through his rage. Afterwards, he had returned to his chambers to bathe and dress. The small box inside his writing desk just made him think of Aelinor, and so he had spent more time pacing the halls until Ser Criston came to summon him.

When he arrived at his mother’s chambers, he found it deathly quiet. His brother was reclined on the sofa, head thrown back and eyes closed. Helaena sat quietly at his side, her hands clasped tightly in front of her. His mother stood in front of the window, her fingers playing with the Star of the Seven that hung at her throat, worry lines creasing her face.

“Aemond,” she barely glanced his way when he walked in. “Where have you been?”

“Training,” He answered.

“Don’t you look nice,” Aegon slowly rolled his head to the side, eyes lazily scanning him from head to toe. “Did you oil your hair?”

Aemond resisted the urge to smooth his hair. He had, in fact, run some oil through it before pulling it back in his usual style. It was more effort than he would usually put it for a court function, but he had found himself overly concerned with preparing for this event. Even his clothing — a relatively simple green and black tunic and matching trousers — had been freshly washed and pressed.

“Anyone in particular you might be doing that for?” Aegon prodded.

Aemond stiffened. “I’m not sure what you mean.”

His mother dropped her hands, turning to stare at him. “Aemond, you cannot be serious. We spoke of Aelinor. She is not your friend.”

No, she was far more than a friend to Aemond, though he couldn’t blame his mother for trying to lessen it. He didn’t reply, just placed both hands behind his back and waited expectantly.

Alicent walked toward him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Aemond, she is betrothed. Rhaenyra has betrothed her to Jacaerys. Everyone knows it, and it has only to be formally announced. You must distance yourself before you are made a fool of.”

He already was a fool. There was no way he could distance himself, not now. And though each reminder that she was promised to Jace felt like a stab in the gut, he kept his face passive. “And what if she does not wish to marry Jacaerys?”

Alicent shook her head in exasperation. “And who would she marry, Aemond? You? Her mother would never tie her family to ours, and we must not tie ourselves to her’s.”

“Aren’t they our family?” Helaena spoke up suddenly, surprising all of them.

Alicent barely spared a glance to her daughter. “The only family we must concern ourselves with are those who live righteously, who honor the gods and the Seven Kingdoms with their actions. Us.”

Aemond bit his tongue. He did not disagree with his mother’s sentiment toward the Princess Rhaenyra, and her sons. They were bastards, and Rhaenyra, though she had been kind to him when he was young, had stood by Lucerys even when he cut out Aemond’s eye. Had not punished the boys when Aelinor was permanently maimed by a fire. He had no love for any of them.

He just considered Aelinor to be something different.

Aegon groaned loudly. “Can we just go? I don’t give a shit which bastards are marrying which whores, and—”

“What did you say?” Aemond demanded, crossing the room in a second. Aegon flinched back, pinned between the couch and his wife. Aemond itched to strike him, his hand curling into a fist.

“Aegon, that talk is beneath you.” Alicent said, though she did not correct it. “And Aemond, leave your brother be. The fool is drunk.”

Aemond sneered in disgust, able to smell the reek of ale off of his brother. His mother was right, Aegon was a fool.”

“The banquet will begin shortly,” Alicent said. “We must be there to receive the guests. And we are all expected to attend, and remain there, for the duration of the evening.”

From her tone, it was clear that there was nothing she wanted to do less than spend a night in revelry and celebration over the return of Princess Rhaenyra.

With exaggerated groans, Aegon peeled himself off the couch, stumbling out the door without waiting for his wife, who trailed meekly after him. Alicent caught Aemond’s arm before he could follow.

“I mean it, Aemond.” Alicent said quietly. “Remember who you are, and who she is.”

“I will, Mother.” He hesitated as he studied her face. Her eyes were ringed with dark circles, and her complexion appeared more sallow than usual. “You don’t look well, Mother. Is there something wrong?”

She sighed, giving his shoulder a quick pat. “I did not sleep well. Your father…he was restless all night.”

How many years had it been, that Aemond watched his mother slowly waste away as she cared for his father, as she tried to hold the Kingdoms together? For the King to have an ill night was the last thing she needed, especially with their visitors and all the activity to come in the next few days.

He gave a curt nod. “Then I shall be on my best behavior. And I shall endeavor to keep Aegon contained as well.”

************************************************************

The banquet was in full swing by the time Aelinor made her way to the hall. The dress they had chosen had required a few alterations to fit, and so she had told her family to go on ahead. Now she was regretting that choice, as it meant she would be entering the room by herself, instead of as part of her mother’s house.

Perhaps she could sneak in. It was always possible that, if the festivities had begun in earnest, she might sneak through the doors and find her way to her mother’s side without anyone noticing her. But alas, when she rounded the corner, the doors to the hall were shut firmly, two guards stationed on either side.

Muttering a curse under her breath, she slowed to a walk, barely managing to compose herself before the doors were being heaved open and a loud voice was proclaiming “The Princess Aelinor Velaryon!”

Three hundred faces stopped to stare at her, and she found it a little hard to breathe. Stepping through the door, she tried to scan the crowd for a familiar face. There, seated at the front of the hall next to an empty seat, was Queen Alicent, with Lord Otto Hightower at her side. Neither of their expressions were particularly welcoming. She could not see her mother, not among the dozens of people paused on the floor, clearly having been in the middle of a dance, nor could she see her or any of her brothers at the long tables that framed the room. She was on her own.

With a deep breath, she clasped her skirt in both hands, the black silk of her skirt crumbling beneath her fingers as she dipped into a small curtsy. Enough to show respect for the Queen, but not so much as would be owed to the King. She rose without wobbling, and then descended the steps as quickly as she could manage. There seemed to be an awkward pause, before she heard the sharp note of a fiddle and the musicians resumed.

Keeping to the edge, she tried to pick her way past the dancers as she searched for her family. Everywhere she turned a noble she did not recognize was offering a bow or a curtsy, usually with a quietly murmured “Princess”. She returned their greetings, but did not linger. Only hours ago she had been excited for the ball, for her chance to attend for the first time. How many times as a child had she hidden up in the rafters with Aemond, dreaming of joining the dancers down below? She glanced up, wondering if there were any young faces doing the same as she had once. But not it seemed only to be a crush of unfamiliar figures, and she longed for a spot of quiet.

“Princess Aelinor,” Someone stepped into her path. He was a small, spindly man with a cane at his side, and an unsettling smirk on his face. “You have much changed.”

His fingers twitched out, nearly catching the crimson chiffon of her sleeve. She took a step back, but was pressed against another stranger, this one ensconced in a conversation and unaware of how he was entrapping the princess.

“Forgive me, Sir.” Aelinor cleared her throat. “But have we met?”

“When you were very small, Princess.” He tilted his head. “And as I said, you have grown much.”

She did not like this man. “Might I have your name, Sir. I don’t—”

“Lina!” She could have wept to hear Aemond’s voice at her side. He emerged from the center of the dance floor, pushing through a dancing pair and coming to stand at her side. “I have been looking for you.”

“I’ve only just arrived. I was speaking to…” She turned around, only to find that the spidery man had vanished back into the crowd. “How odd.”

“Was someone bothering you?”

“No, it was only strange.” She tried to shake the interaction from her mind. “My, don’t you look every bit the handsome prince.”

Aemond shrugged, uncomfortable with the compliment. But it was the truth. Aelinor could not recall ever seeing him look so fine. His tunic was embroidered with gold thread, the rich green so dark that it was nearly black. His silver hair was smoothed back, falling over his wide shoulders.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” He asked.

Aelinor glanced around, well aware that every person around them was only pretending not to eavesdrop. “I just arrived. I have not even—”

“Little Aelinor!” A hand landed on the small of her back. “I knew I would find you here.”

“Uncle.” She greeted Aegon with a polite curtsy, resisting the urge to shuffle away from his touch. “I trust you are well?”

His eyes drooped slightly as he appraised her. “All the better for seeing you.”

“Brother, I—” Aemond tried to cut in.

“Darling Niece,” Aegon continued. “Care to dance?”

There was no polite way to refuse an offer from a prince, especially not when it had been made so publicly.

“Of course, Uncle.” She set her good hand in his, shooting Aemond a look of apology. “Perhaps I shall see you later?”

“Oh, I’m certain he will make sure of it.” Aegon tugged her away, leading her right to the center of the floor.

Aelinor could feel the eyes following her as Aegon stopped them in the center of the floor, assuming the position for a quick four step, a dance she knew quite well. When she glanced to the side, she saw the Queen standing from her seat, disappearing into the crowd just as the musicians struck up a new song.

This particular dance was quite easy, involving two partners who moved around each other in a circle, occasionally clasping hands or jumping. It was ideal for chatting with a suitor, but unfortunately, Aelinor had no interest in chatting with Aemond, not when she could smell drink on his breath.

Aegon, for his part, did not seem overly interested in conversing. He moved through the steps lazily, clearly too drunk to execute them gracefully, but also too familiar to make a complete mockery of himself. Twenty couples moved around them, all of them completely silent, waiting to catch wind of what Prince Aegon and her might be discussing.

“How is Helaena?” Aelinor began, remembering her mother’s request to behave as if nothing was wrong. “I have not yet had the chance to speak with her.”

Aegon shrugged. “I’ve not seen her tonight.”

“No?” Aelinor frowned, before plastering a smile back on her face. “Well, then. Your children, how are they?”

“I have three of them.” Aegon said, clearly not overwhelmed with fatherly affection.

Aelinor tried to drum up some sympathy for her uncle. As long as she had known him, he had never thrived in the spotlight, nor had he been enthusiastic about wedding Helaena. But as someone who had never been drawn to the drink, Aelinor could not quite bring herself to forgive his inebriation.

“My brother,” Aegon drawled. “Seems unable to keep his eye off of you.”

Aelinor ignored the jibe. “I’m sure he’s just observing the dancing.”

“Or he’s fueling his obsession with you,” Aegon leaned forward conspiratorially. “Tell me, Niece. What do you see in my brother?”

His hands had curled almost painfully into her waist. The music ended and Aelinor snapped back, putting space between them.

“For one thing,” She hissed. “He’s not a drunken lech.”

Bobbing a curtsy, she left him on the floor. Unfortunately, she did not see Aemond in the crowd. Intending to resume the search for her mother, she moved toward the front of the room, only to nearly walk directly into the Queen.

“Your Majesty,” She curtsied, feeling like she had spent most of the evening bobbing up and down. “Forgive me, I did not see you there.”

Alicent held both hands in front of her, her red hair shining against the emerald of her gown. “Aelinor. You look beautiful.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty.” Aelinor nodded gratefully. She would not pretend that she had ever been friendly with Alicent, but the Queen had always been kind to her as a child.

“Did you enjoy your dance?” Alicent asked.

“I did,” Aelinor said too quickly. “It was…nice to see Aegon again.”

“Hm,” Alicent looked like she did not believe her. “Well, I’m glad. I think you’ll find it difficult to source another partner.”

“Your…your Majesty?”

Alicent leaned forward. “You look beautiful, Aelinor. But no one wishes to dance with a cripple.”

Aelinor recoiled, her mouth falling open as the Queen walked away. That was…that had been cruel. Overcome with shame, Aelinor adjusted her long sleeve so that it fell over her injured hand. She knew her hand unsettled people, but it did not make her a cripple. And she would never have expected something so malicious to come out of the Queen’s mouth.

“Aelinor! Are you alright?”

The crowd this evening just seemed to keep throwing conversations her way. Thankfully, this time it was Aemond, who placed one hand on her elbow.

“Aemond,” She said quietly.

“Was that my mother?” He asked. “Are you alright, you look pale.”

Aelinor shook her head. “I’m quite alright.”

“Would you care to dance with me?” He asked, looking a bit nervous. “If you…if you would like to.”

Aelinor glanced up at him. “I would love to, Aemond, But I should really find my family. I promised Jace a dance and I—”

Aemond frowned, and she remembered how he did not like to be reminded of her near-betrothal to Jace.

Two courtiers moved past, whispering as they did. Aelinor hid her hand further in her sleeve, the Queen’s jibe stinging sharply through her veins. “I can find them later. Let us dance.”

Aemond smiled, and she thought she heard someone nearby gasp as he took her hand and led her back to the floor. They took up a spot on the edge, and Aemond grasped her waist with one hand as the musicians began. This was a slower set, allowing them to whirl between other couples in time with the music. Aelinor was a bit lost in her thoughts, her mind swirling with the music and her conversation with the Queen.

“You’re hiding your hand,” Aemond whispered. “Why?”

“What?” Aelinor looked up. He was so much taller than her, so much that she had to tilt her head back to see his face.”Oh, I just…it looks better this way.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to care very much how it looks.” Aemond said. “After all, you are—”

The music stopped suddenly, and Aelinor spun a few more steps before they stopped. The guests were all turning to the dias, where Princess Rhaenyra, Princess Rhaenys, and their children stood in a neat line.

Aelinor tilted her head. “What are they doing?”

Queen Alicent was standing at the foot of the dias, her eyes wide as she stared up at the princess. It took only a few moments for the hall to fall completely silent, all eyes on Rhaenyra.

“We are grateful to everyone for being here today,” Rhaenyra said. “It has been wonderful to see so many familiar faces.”

The crowd murmured in approval.

“I think she’s just thanking the court,” Aelinor whispered, conscious of how Aemond’s hand still lingered at her back.

“And,” Rhaenyra continued. “I would like to take this opportunity to impart on the court an announcement that is sure to bring great happiness to us all.”

Jace stepped up to his mother’s side, and Aelinor felt her blood run cold. This was it. They were about to announce it to everyone, and then her fate would be sealed. She felt a few eyes turning her way, the rumor mill no doubt assuring that most courtiers could predict what this announcement may be.

“It gives me great job to announce the betrothal of my son Prince Jacaerys—”

Oh gods, here it was.

“And my son Prince Lucerys to the Princesses Baela and Rhaena. This joining of two great Valyrian houses will no doubt be a triumph for the realm.”

A thousand emotions flooded Aelinor, the foremost of them being shock. Jacaerys was betrothed to Baela? What did this mean? Her mother had never wavered in her intention to betrothe her two eldest children, and yet…she had just changed her mind before the entire court.

Jace held out a hand to Baela, both of them beaming as they descended to the floor for a dance.

Queen Alicent climbed the steps quickly, speaking in hushed tones to Rhaenyra as the room slowly resumed the party. Things made a bit more sense to Aelinor, then. The trial addressing Luc’s succession would take place the following day, and Rhaenyra had just assured that the Velaryons would support his claim. It would now be Vaemond standing against his own family, almost certainly guaranteeing them success.

But people were whispering, casting looks her way as they moved through the room. The dancing began anew, and yet she just stood there, Aemond by her side, trying to process what was happening.

“Cast aside—”

“The bastards are—”

“...betrothed to a cripple…”

It was all too much, and Aelinor turned quickly and rushed from the room. She shoved through the crowd, around one of the tables and out through one of the servant doors. She was barely aware of someone following until she felt Aemond’s hand on her arm.

“Lina, are you—”

A servant moved past, carrying a tray of sweetmeats, and he gave the Princess a concerned look.

Aemond turned to him and roared. “OUT! Now!”

******************************************************

The evening had not taken the turn that Aemond had expected. He had expected to endure a night of endless political preening, perhaps stealing a dance with Aelinor or his sister, and now he was huddled in a servants’ corridor, while Aelinor hid in the corner.

“I’m sorry,” she held a hand to her mouth. “I just….everyone was talking and I…I just couldn’t…”

“Take all the time you need,” Aemond assured her. “No one will bother you.”

In truth, he was seething inside. For a split second, he had been overjoyed. To know that Aelinor would not be marrying Jacaerys…if he were devout it would have been something he prayed for. But then he had watched the bastard lead his new betrothed into a dance, and he had seen how Aelinor’s face had fallen.

That bastard had cast her aside, her entire family had opened her up to scorn. As if the bastard even deserved Aelinor at all. No, he deserved nothing, but Aelinor certainly did not deserve to be publicly rejected in front of the court like that.

Aelinor was shaking her head. “Gods, she could have told me.”

“You did not deserve that,” Aemond hissed. “For him to gloat and—”

She held up a hand. “He was not gloating. He and Baela are well suited, and I am happy for them.”

She was too kind. Too generous. She would forgive them, she always would, just as she had forgiven them when they maimed her as a child. This was what happened when he wasn’t by her side, she was coerced into accepting this treatment from them, when she deserved far better.

“Perhaps I’ll get to go back to Dragonstone in peace,” She gave a small smile.

“You cannot allow—”

“Did you want me to marry Jace? Is that it?” She demanded. “Because after last night, I rather thought that you…that we…”

“That we were what?” Aemond stepped forward until her back was against the wall.

Aelinor sighed. “I don’t know, Aemond. Tonight has been overwhelming, and there are so many people here who I do not know. I just need to go back to Dragonstone, to people who understand me, and it will—”

Aemond reached up and ripped off his eye patch. “I understand you!”

Her lips parted as she stared up at him, at the blue gem that flickered in the torch light. Aemond’s chest was heaving with some kind of craze, and he knew he should step back. He had to, before he did something that both of them regretted. But nothing in him was strong enough to move away from her.

Slowly she lifted her injured hand, silk sleeves falling away as she let her fingertips trace the edges of his scar, inching closer to his eye.

“That’s my sapphire,” She breathed. “You…you actually did it.”

“Of course I did,” He lifted his hand to grasp hers. “How could you think that I don’t understand you?”

“I…that is not what I meant.” She whispered.

“I know,” He nodded. “And…I don’t mean to force your hand. You deserve better than your brother, and I won’t pretend that I am a better option. I only wanted you to see that I…that I have always…”

“Aemond…” She leaned closer.

Footsteps sounded in the hallway, and Aemond wrenched himself away just as a servant came through carrying pitchers of wine. They waited until the servant had passed into the ballroom before speaking again.

“Thank you, Aemond.” Aelinor said, kneeling to the ground to pick up his eye patch. “Thank you for always being there.”

He couldn’t find the strength to speak as he took the eyepatch from her. Sighing, Aelinor stepped past, “And Aemond?”

“Yes?”

She gave him a small smile. “I do not think you should have to hide, either.”

Aemond watched her disappear through the door before retying his eye patch, making sure to cover his eye entirely. When he stepped back into the room, he saw Aelinor making her way toward her mother, but his eye sought out another.

On the dance floor, Jacaerys spun Baela in what must be their second or third dance. Aemond felt his blood boil. Aelinor might be willing to forgive, but he was not so generous.

Before the night was out, the bastard would answer to him.

#house of the dragon #hotd #team black #team green #aemond #aemond x oc #fanfiction #aemond fanfiction #aemond targaryen #aemond one eye #fanfic #lady of the ashes

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littleandless · 5 months ago

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SEASON 2 EPISODE 4 THOUGHTS

spoilers ahead

Daemon being tormented by visions of his past is so juicy. I hope we see a similar sequence once Aemond takes over Harrenhal.

POOR RHAENYS! She and Corlys seemed very much in love, so the knowledge of an affair that was so lengthy it produced not just one but TWO children has got to hurt like an absolute bitch.

Leaving Jace and Baela to take the heat while both of their parents are off doing gods know what was pure evil omg. At least Grammy Rhaenys always has their back.

And the sass? Lmao everyone is on some different shit this episode. Aemond, Alicent, Baela, Jace, Rhaenyra, etc etc. I LOVE IT.

Do you think Cole is brave and ruthless or just begging for death lowkey? I think these traits go hand in hand at times.

Gwayne is the only one scared enough to admit how crazy all that shit seems.

Watching Aegon realize his own uselessness is sad, I must admit. After everyone impressed upon him the importance of his inheritance and how much has been sacrificed in order to give it to him, I reckon he must have thought that he was important as an individual as well. Why else go to such lengths? It’s just as I imagine Alicent felt when she realized all of her years of suffering were pointless. He doesn’t realize he was basically meant to be a puppet, like his father was before him. Otto and Alicent were the real rulers. But now Otto is gone and no one listens to Alicent, and people have grown tired of pretending that Aegon isn’t mostly irrelevant.

Good for Aemond though. Like yeah you can laugh at me if you want, but everyone that matters knows you’re the biggest joke of all.

Yay abortion ♥️

No but seriously, how do we think Larys will use the moon tea against Alicent? I think he knew the deal before he even showed up at her chambers but he likes to watch people squirm. I’m scared lol.

Also poor Maester Orwyle having to answer such a loaded question. Girl NO ONE is going to make you feel better about this 😭

Alys being a wonderful witchy wench as usual like yeeessss torment that man!

Potions so potent that Daemon had a Joe Biden moment.

I do feel a bit sad when Alicent unleashes her pent-up feelings at Aegon. Their relationship is so fraught it drives me insane.

Is she wrong though? Lol. I just wish she would apply her sass to more than just her eldest son.

Some tension in the relationship between Jace and Rhaenyra. He desperately wants to be of use and Rhaenyra is much more reserved with her heirs these days, understandably so. I’m glad she told him about the song of ice and fire though.

Rhaenys volunteering to go made me sad. I knew it was coming, but still.

The whole dragon sequence was fucking insane. Vhagar blending in with the forest floor was cool as hell. Aegon stumbling into a life-or-death situation when he CLEARLY has no idea what is going on after a fight with his mother is peak teen behavior. Aemond silently cursing his stupidity and then lowkey taking advantage of it. And he could always play it off as a mistake as well, since nobody but the three dragonriders really knows what went down and well…the other two are incapacitated 🤭 PRINCE REGENT ERA LET’S GO

Rhaenys had the opportunity to flee after leaving Aegon badly injured but she went back anyway. Much like Cole, one can question if it’s brave or suicidal or both. Heroes often possess a mix of these.

Also I have no idea what is going on in most battle scenes so I didn’t realize until the end that Cole was being a strategist. Good for him I guess.

That dead guy falling into ash was cool and scary.

Gwayne takes care of business while Cole and Aemond take a peek at Aegon. I know he’s burned pretty badly and doesn’t die, so I’m not too agonized over the (probably very graphic) reveal next episode.

Aemond taking Dark Sister (edit: prophecy dagger thingy) was kind of a bitch move though.

Wait do you think he’ll learn about the song of ice and fire at Harrenhal? Maybe Alys and other magical influences will reveal it to him, or he’ll decide to stick the blade in the fire on a whim idk.

BUT WOW WHAT AN EPISODE! my asshole was clenched like 60% of the time so you know it was good.

#tmi? well whatever #house of the dragon #house of the dragon spoilers #fire & blood spoilers #alicent hightower #rhaenyra targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #aemond targaryen #community seat #hotd s2e4

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bizlybebo · 7 months ago

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jrwi headcannond

YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY HII ANONNN

this is such an awesome fucking ask to get. ouguohigohoh i’m about to RAMBLE

plspls let me know if the post doesn’t minimize so i can add a “read more” thing i don’t wanna clog peoples dashes

I’ve really only watched PD and Riptide so. take these ^__^ (SPOILERS UP TO RIPTIDE EP109 AND UP TO PD S2 EP19)

Riptide:

- Chip tried to teach Gillion sign language, but he was very confused at first. He didn’t get it because signing “sun” didn’t make a literal sun, etc. He even thought they were magic spells/incantations at one point. Eventually, though, Gill finally understood them— most prominently, the sign for “I love you”. He signed it to Jay during that moment in ep 53, and Chip found the slightest bit of strength during that moment in 109 to curl two fingers in and sign “I love you” to his crew, with what he thought was the last of his strength.

- Mae (May?) Ferin has very curly hair, which was brown but greyed with age. Jay got the vibrant orange hair from her father, but in my brain she has the curls from her mother, and to me that symbolizes how she strikes a balance between being a Ferin and being her own person, following what her mother wants for her (which is just to be happy).

^^^(Ava Ferin had the same hair as her father. She was the spitting image of what a navy captain was meant to be. She was like a mini Jayson growing up.)

- All the Ferins have wings. That’s it. Jayson’s, Jay’s, Ava’s, etc. are white, slightly blue-ish feathers. Drey’s wings are brown and black. His wings are pretty out of shape now, he can’t really fly anymore, but he can still lift them enough to put them over Jay’s, or Ollie’s, or Finn’s shoulders, and it’s like a blanket. He does it to Earl sometimes just because Earl hates it lmao

- Gillion has very long hair and prides himself on all the ways he can braid it into the traditional styles of the Undersea. It’s a slightly different way of braiding than on the oversea, though, so he taught his way of braiding to Jay, who taught her way of braiding to him. They also taught Ollie. who does Drey’s hair for him and occasionally Chip’s if he can be convinced.

- Hair is also a very sacred thing in the Undersea— one only cuts their hair when they have lost a battle, and so long hair is very respectable. When Gill first was exiled to the Oversea, his hip-length hair got cut very short, up to his chin. It grew out gradually over the campaign, but he tried to cut it after the events of 53, only being convinced not to by Jay when she fully understood why he was doing it. Gillion prides himself very much on his hair.

- Jay is dyslexic. In the Feywild, during that one segment, she lost the ability to read because the magic was preying on one of her insecurities, in a sense. Dyslexic Jay the headcanon i truth most.

- Chip has mild apraxia. It’s real to me.

- Also all of albatrio has/had speech impediments cause I said so. Gillion has rhotacism, Jay has a stutter, and Chip had a lisp growing up which still slips out occasionally.

-Joke headcanon that slowly became real to me: Gillion did Chip’s top surgery in ep 15

Prime Defenders:

- MORE SPEECH IMPEDIMENT HEADCANONS CAUSE I LOVE PROJECTING !! Dakota has a lisp/stutter, and Ashe has a general speech disruption. Ashe also has selective mutism ^__^

- To me, Summer and Cantrip had an enemies to lovers sideplot in early to mid season 2. I think Doug probably mentioned how when he was a villain, he worked with this girl Cantrip, who was Ruby’s sister, and Summer got curious and was like “damn. I wonder where she is now” and sought her out to try and talk to her. And literally their early dynamic was Jade going “kys” and Summer being like “i can fix her!!!”

- Xavier and Jade are mlm wlw hostility. Summer and Doug are mlm wlw hostility. Not reaaaally a headcanon but i had to say it.

- William’s family was very religious growing up. He also came from one of those small, Southern hunting towns and so he has the accent and everything (moomin infected my brain with this one <3).

- The PD season 1 finale took place a few days before Halloween, and the four of them had matching costumes planned out together but never did get to wear them.

- Also, to me, the greyscale arc takes place on or very close to Christmas.

- Dakota didn’t really celebrate his birthday nor Christmas for many years because of how lonely those holidays got for him— he didn’t really get a very good birthday/xmas after the events of the Resurgence. However, Tide didn’t know this and got him a birthday gift once, and Dakota ugly cried while hugging him.

- Shockwave was transmasc. He means the world to me. (Also why Tide is such a good hashtag ally)

- Dakota is very scared of spiders for no apparent reason. Whenever they show up he jumps up onto a table or onto Ashe’s back and tries to fight it off with a broom. Ashe is the one who has to take care of it.

- Gender straight up Isn’t Real on Fauna. Vyncent is literally genderless but nobody asked him when he got to Prime so he literally just went along with being he/him’d and didn’t really mind. (this one’s from arachnid lmao)

- Doug and Summer are queerplatonic that’s it that’s the post

- Ashe is a natural blonde, just like Mark, but bleaches their hair. Everyone was fucking shocked to find out about this

- Lightspeed and Wordsmith are also mlm/wlw hostility. real and canon to me

this is literally just the first ones off the top of my head i have so many but i’ve been writing this post for nearly an hour so i think i’ll cut it off here ^__^

#vixen rambles #vixen answers #the PD rambles got LONG and not super comprehensive sorru </3 #jrwi #jrwi riptide #jrwi pd #prime defenders #jrwi headcanon

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redeemers-and-dragons · 7 months ago

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Redeemers: Greenest in Flames! Part 4

Temple Bell: RING. RING. RING.

Narration: The Temple of Chauntea is a large square building, made of fieldstone with a peaked slate roof. One of its two bell towers rings, catching a gleam of moonlight every swing, a cry for help. Several groups of masked men and kobolds surround the building, seeking to force their way in, or force the trapped townsfolk out. Jaune and Adam peer over the cobble stone wall that borders the sacred grounds to the south.

Jaune: *Holds onto his holy symbol, stemming his anger at the sight of a religious sanctuary being flagrantly defiled this way.* …What’s the count?

Adam: Two gray masks and six kobolds at the back door. Looks like they’re trying to start a fire.

Neon: *Slinks her way to their sides from the left.* I also got two gray masks and six kobolds with a battering ram at the front doors. There is also a really creepy guy with a white mask. Looks like the boss.

May: *Drops down from a tree from behind them* I also count a wandering parade of three gray masks, ten kobolds, and two guard drakes. Should be coming around the corner… now.

Narration: *On May’s que, a trio of men in masks slowly lead a procession of chanting kobolds, all either stomping their clawed feet and spears or banging their shields with their fists and blades. On either side of the line of kobolds prowls two dog-like reptile creatures that snap, growl, and foam at the mouth, wanting to tear apart anything that even looks their way.*

Gray Mask: *Beating a hand drum.* Do not be fooled by your false idols! Their promises cannot protect you anymore than these doors can. Only the Dragon Queen can spare you now…

Kobolds: Break. To. Bits! Burn. To. Ash! Break. To. Bits…!

The Party: *They watch as the procession turns the corner again, taking their chants of violence with them.*

Adam: Outnumbered 8 to 1. You don’t need to be a seasoned general to know those are unfavorable odds.

May: We just need to get the civilians out. By my calculations they’ll circle the church every eight minutes. That’d be a four minute window at best before the rest discover us attacking one side.

Neon: Well we better attack quickly, because I’m not totally confident in that front door holding for long.

Jaune: *He studies the group of invaders at the back piling hay and dried grass at the bottom of the heavy wooden door, thick smoke rising to the night sky* Alright, then here’s the plan…

~O~O~O~O~O~

Narration: *Caught up in their task of tending to the fire by the back door, many of the kobolds failed to notice the elementally charged crossbow bolt that zipped past them, striking the tinder pile. The resulting explosion sent a shower of burning debris into the air, accompanied by a thick cloud of blinding smoke that engulfed the area, leaving the kobolds and masked men disoriented and struggling to breathe.*

Gray Mask #1: *Cough! Cough* What the hell?

Adam: *Charges in from out of nowhere, shoulder checking the masked man flying straight into the wall of the temple so hard, you’d swear he cracked the stone.*

Gray Mask #2: *Coughs as she draws her hand crossbow on Adam, but has it immediately knocked out of her hand by a nun-chuck.*

Neon: *Spins her nun chuck and hits the Gray Mask right in the jaw, knocking her mask off, then immediately roundhouse kicks a kobold.*

Jaune: *Charges in and shield bashes a kobold then raises it against the spear of a different one, fending the kobolds off until the masks are dealt with.*

Gray Mask #1: *Coughs blood as he stumbles back to his feet, raising a poisoned dagger. Before he can strike, a crossbow bolt nails his arm to the wall. Before he can yell in pain, Adam knocks his head against the wall again, causing him to slump.*

Adam: *Grunts and wields his massive great sword in two hands and slashes through two kobolds in one swipe.*

Gray Mask #2: *Draws a hand ax and swings at Neon*

Neon: *Catches the arm and judo throws the woman over her shoulder*

May: *Runs up and hits the woman with the butt of her great crossbow, knocking her out.*

Jaune: *Gets stabbed in the arm by a kobold’s spear. He uses his sword to cut the spear in half and kicks the kobold back into the squad.* SLEEP!

Kobolds: *The kobolds scramble to get back on their feet, but the spell has been done. Jaune points his sword at them, commanding them to sleep. Almost instantly, the kobolds start to drool and yawn, falling into a deep slumber before they even make it on their feet again.*

Jaune: *He can barely take a single breath before he orders the team back into action. There just wasn’t any time to waste now.* Adam, get the door.

Adam: *Nods before thrusting the tip of his great sword along the hinges of the thick wooden door. With a show of effort, the minotaur managed to pry the door out of the doorway, causing an uproar of screams and cries of terror from inside.*

Woman: They broke in!

Man: Get the women and children away from the door!

Jaune: *Runs in, weapon holstered and holding up his Talisman of Boldrei.* It’s okay! We won’t hurt you!

Preacher: *Signs a religious symbol in praise.* Oh thank Chanteau, a paladin! Are you here to rescue us?

Jaune: Yes. But we have to go, now! We’re going to the keep! Come on!

Narration: *The preacher urges the rest of the people in the temple to follow Jaune outside, and they obey as quickly as they can. Unfortunately, there were quite a few elderly and injured people amongst the crowd, making evacuation very time consuming. The front door began splintering and cracking under the battering of the invaders, and the chanting of the procession was coming closer towards the back of the temple.*

May: *Peering around the corner at the oncoming mob of hostiles. She dips back and grabs the discarded mask from the ground and a black coat from the unconscious woman, putting them both on.* Contingency time. You think you can out run a couple of drake hounds?

Neon: Please, leading things that want a taste of me on a chase is, like, my specialty. *Takes a quick moment to stretch her legs.*

Narration: *Just as the large group of masked men and kobolds were halfway to the back of the church, they were suddenly halted by the sight of a tabaxi sprinting across their path, and then jumped right on top of the stone wall surrounding the church* Wow! Didn’t know the Ugly Parade was in town! *Laughs and winks as she drops down out of view on the other side*

May: *Limps out in her disguise, bloodied and holding herself up against the side of the temple. She points to where Neon had run off to* What are you doing?! STOP HER! *Crumples down to her knee*

Narration: *Without waiting for an answer, there was a loud roar and the pair of drake hounds burst forth and bound over the stone wall after their prey, followed by the mob of kobolds that were excited for a hunt, and lastly followed by two of the gray masks giving orders to give chase. All that was left was one Gray Mask that rushed to May’s side.*

Gray Mask: *Helping May to her feet* What happened? How did they…? *Anyone could recognize the moment of realization in the man’s eyes even through his scaled mask. It was the very moment he saw the stream of villagers escaping through the back of the church, and also the second before May slit his throat with a knife.*

May: *Covers the man’s mouth with one hand, and wraps an arm around his waist to pull him back around the corner with her before any of the other’s saw. She leaned him up against the wall before taking off her mask and helping with the evacuation.*

Adam: *As the invaders were making headway on the front doors of the temple, he would lift up entire pews and stack them right in front of it to slow them down.* We don’t have much time, Knight!

Jaune: *Ushering an old lady out* This is the last of them! We can-

Narration: *The front doors of the temple managed to be broken open with a loud crash, allowing a man in a White Mask to push his way in, along with a couple kobolds following in behind*

White Mask: You dare stand against the might of the Dragon Queen?! Infidels!!

Adam: *Hefts his great sword* I’ve been called worse.

Jaune: *Draws his long sword* You defile sacred grounds. Drop your weapon or redemption will be out of your grasp.

White Mask: *Draws a large dagger shaped like a jagged icicle* The only thing I wish to grasp is your frozen heart! *Swings his blade, sending a magical spike of ice towards Adam*

Adam: *Tries to duck out of the way, but his large frame was an easy target. The icicle sunk into his shoulder, then shattered into crystalized fragments that rained onto Jaune before he could raise his shield.* GAH!

White Mask: *Smirks* Can’t handle a little bit of ice-?

Jaune: *Channels Divinity* Rebuke the Violent!

White Mask: Huh-? *Before the man had a chance to respond, a brilliant, radiant light emanated from Adam's wounded arm, and gleamed onto White Mask's own arm, aligning perfectly with the spot where the spell had struck. In an instant, the masked man's arm erupted into a blinding explosion of searing, radiant burns.* GAAAH!!!

Adam: *Roars at the top of his lung and charges forward, dragging his great sword into an uppercut that slashes right through the middle of the White Mask and sends him flying up towards the ceiling before landing in a bloody heap on the pile of pews by the door. This sight alone was enough to send the kobolds retreating right back through the front entrance.*

Jaune: *Runs to Adam’s side* Adam! Are you ok?

Adam: *Looks down at his frostbitten and badly slashed arm* Heal it later. We have to move.

Jaune: *Still looks worried but nods as the two of them rush out the back*

~O~O~O~O~O~

Narration: *It took a few minutes for Jaune and Adam to catch back up with the refugees, now hiding by the river with May.*

May: *Looks at Adam’s arm* Shit, what happened to you?

Adam: It’s just a scratch, I’ll be fine.

Jaune: *Sighs* We’ll heal it later, right now-

Narration: *All of a sudden the sound of rustling bushes came from behind them, causing all three adventurers to turn their weapons on the source.*

Neon: *Limping out* Jeez, not even a hello for your favorite girl?

Jaune: Neon! Did you get hurt?!

Neon: No big whoop. Guess those ugly lizard dogs were a little faster than I thought, but I gave them a few good kicks and then the slip. We get everyone?

May: *Nods* Yes. We managed to get everyone out, and then some. *She gestures to a pair of townspeople keeping a hold on the once masked woman they had knocked out in the initial fight, now trying to curse through a gag and pulling at the ropes that bind her hands.*

Adam: You took a prisoner.

Neon: The heck you bring her along for?

May: I figured it was time for us to start getting some answers. This group is clearly well organized and highly motivated by some sort of cause - it's imperative that we know who we are dealing with.

Jaune: *Takes a moment to take in this new development.* May is right. We are not dealing with regular raiders here. When we get back to the keep, we need to interrogate her for whatever information we can get.

Neon: Well, Detective. Who’s gonna play Good Cop and Bad Cop?

#redeemers au #jaune arc #adam taurus #neon katt #may zedong

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whimsicallyenchantedrose · 7 months ago

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Season 3 Rewatch Drabbles: 3x22 There's No Place Like Home (Part 2)

Summary: A series of 100-500 word drabbles to accompany my rewatch of season 3 of Once Upon a Time. There will be a drabble–either a deleted scene, a “fix it” fic or a character musing for each episode of the season. Focus will be on Emma, Henry, the Charmings and Killian–with an emphasis on Captain Swan’s epic love story.

Word Count: 493

Other Chapters: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15) (16) (17) (18) (19) (20) (21) (22) (23) (24) (25) (27) (28)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Notes: I knew there was no way I could stick to just one drabble an episode for the CS movie, so I didn't even try. There will be 2 drabbles for 3x21 and 4 for 3x22. They are all written, so the plan is to post one per day until they're all posted.

Note #2: Thanks to @jrob64 and @snowbellewells for the prompt!

She was in shock. There was no other way to explain her current state of calm after what had just happened, after what she’d just witnessed.

After escaping the Evil Queen’s cell, with her innocent prisoner in tow, Hook had filled her in on what she’d missed. Snow White had sent them a way to get into the castle, but she hadn’t met back up with them, and they were concerned she’d been captured.

When they’d reached the large, circular window overlooking the courtyard, they discovered that their concerns were more than founded.

Emma would never forget the horror of looking down to see her mom tied to a stake, surrounded by wood and with the Evil Queen preparing to hurl a fireball in her direction. She’d been desperate to move, to act, to do something to stop what was about to happen, but without her magic, she was completely powerless.

As the Evil Queen let the fireball fly, and as her mother’s writhing form was consumed, Hook pulled her to himself, and she clung to him. Needing him, needing his comfort more than she ever had before.

They’d watched in horrified fascination as the fire quickly did its job, leaving nothing but ash in its wake. She couldn’t look away. As horrific as it was, she couldn’t look away.

Finally, as the guards and the Queen turned back toward the castle, Hook had reminded them that they would accomplish nothing by being captured themselves, and they’d stealthily left the castle, returning to the fire her dad and Killian had built while they waited.

“After my brother passed,” Killian said almost hesitantly once the two of them were again alone, “all I could do was relive that final, terrible moment. Don’t do that to yourself, love. All we can do at times like these is to try to live in the here and now.”

She appreciated his attempts to help her through this, but it would take some time before she could close her eyes without seeing her mother murdered before her eyes and her completely powerless to stop it.

They had failed, and failed so profoundly, nothing could ever be right again. Her mom was dead, and with her gone, Regina would never be defeated, the kingdom would never be saved, her dad would never have true love, her baby brother, who’d just been born, would never exist.

Would never exist.

Suddenly a ray of hope pierced her darkness.

“Here and now,” she said, brow furrowed. “I’m still here. How is that possible? We saw her die, which means I would never be born.”

Killian’s eyes widened as the implications of her words hit him. “You should have faded from existence.”

“Exactly,” she said.

“Well then, perhaps–” he began slowly.

“She’s still alive!” Emma said, knowing that somehow, some way, against all odds it had to be true. She hadn’t lost her mother after all, not yet anyway. There was still hope!

NEXT CHAPTER->

#season 3 rewatch drabbles #3x22 there's no place like home #captain swan fanfiction #my fanfiction

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beauty-and-passion · 7 months ago

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TMA - Chapters 41-50: Everyone is Michael

Hello people, welcome back to the beginning of TMA season 2! Ten more chapters are waiting and I am ready to find out if this season is gonna start with a bang or not.

I have high expectations.

<< Main Masterlist < Previous post

_______________________________

MAG 40.1 - Season 2 Trailer

Oh, a trailer! And it was… absolutely incomprehensible and cryptic af. All I got is that a trapdoor should’ve been locked, which translated from author-to-reader means: “The trapdoor is open and some weird supernatural shit will come out of it during the season”.

Well played, Mr. Sims. Now I really want to know more.

_______________________________

MAG 41 - Too Deep

Ooooh, statement of Jonathan Sims? And it’s about the recently discovered tunnels! I love that we start season 2 directly from where we left in season 1: Jon is recovering, Jane Prentiss is recently dead (I suppose they burned her, considering the ashes) and there are a shit ton of tunnels to explore.

Also, Jon is now paranoid. Great, that’s exactly what he needed.

Jokes aside, this is an amazing choice from a writing perspective, because it’s perfectly justifiable. Jon got assaulted by Jane Prentiss and her worms on July 29th, now it’s September 2nd. It’s been a little more than one month, of course he’s still haunted by the idea that Jane (or other things) might be alive and spying on him.

Even if the feeling of being watched is not just paranoia. I bet everything that it’s Big Brother’s fault for that.

And just to confirm my words, it seems that the Archives have been built on part of this ex Millbank prison, which was built by following the idea of the Panopticon. You know, the prison centered around the idea of making the prisoners feel like they’re always watched, thanks to the central tower.

I love the idea of the Panopticon: it’s extremely cool and I’m very happy to see it here too… but it also proves I am right and Big Brother is some supernatural shit who watches everyone and has something like one million eyes or whatever.

The goddamn weird tunnels. And what about that incorporeal voice telling Jon to leave, right after inviting him to go down? I am extremely curious now, I want to know more! Who was it? Big Brother? Another supernatural shit?

Ah, so Jon will now add supplements to the statements, hide them from his staff just like he hid the existence of the second tape recorder and will put these parts away with precise instructions for his replacement, in case he dies. Great, so he’s this paranoid. Basically one step away from being pathological.

Fine, from one side, I can understand him because he faced some heavy shit not too long ago and he cannot trust anyone. So his sentence “Trust can get you killed” is understandable.

But I also watched Gravity Falls and I’ve learned that “trust no one” doesn’t help, especially if there is a demon watching/haunting you. So please, Jon: please. Be safe. Don’t pull a Dipper Pines on us. Don’t force me to start calling you Jon Dipper. Or Jipper.

And trust someone before some bad shit happens. You’re trying to find Gertrude Robinson’s killer and we all know it was Elias (don’t “first suspect” me and yourself, we both know it was him). So, since Elias already killed one person and he’s in cahoots with the Lukas family, you REALLY need as many allies as possible.

_______________________________

MAG 42 - Grifter’s Bone

Here we are, back with simple, meh statements. This time, it’s “weird supernatural band kills with their weird supernatural music”. It’s a shame we don’t see how they do it, I would’ve loved to see the whole process. But I also understand that leaving this to the reader’s imagination is a good choice to make something scary.

Also, Alfred Grifter looking up after the massacre and asking “Encore?” is probably the most badass move of the series until now. He might be some minor supernatural shit, but that was a real power move. I respect him a little bit after this.

Glad to notice Jon’s skepticism is back too, but after the end of season 1, now I know why he does it and I understand. Also, his skepticism doesn’t seem as “stubborn” as before and that’s another great writing choice because it shows how all these supernatural shits are affecting him.

Also, since Jon is in Paranoia Land now, I suppose that emphasizing skepticism helps him hide his true intentions, which are… sigh, controlling Martin. Seriously, can this poor guy take a vacation? First the worms, then Jane Prentiss, now Jipper. Martin can’t even be competent, that his boss will question it - all while insulting his poetic skills. The paranoia made Jon even more of an asshole than before.

What? Martin is worried about the others finding out he’s been lying? Lying about what? Jane Prentiss? His supposed incompetence? His poetic skills? His need to go on vacation? In any of these cases, don’t worry, Martin: just take your stuff and go as far away from this Institute as possible.

I still dream something like this for Martin.

_______________________________

MAG 43 - Section 31

I feel Basira will be a recurring character from now on. I mean, she is currently working on Gertrude’s case and she is a Section 31 - i.e. she dealt with supernatural shits before. But she’s not the only one: we also have Alice “Daisy” Tonner, who came in contact with “spider husks” and, for me, that means one thing only: “Spider Mom & gang”. So I bet these two women will probably be involved again with any other supernatural shit happening in this Institute.

It was also very cool to find out the name of the guy from MAG 12: Diego Molina. And I remember that, when he and Gerard were brought to the hospital, Gerard asked if Diego had “a small book bound in red leather and a brass pendant with an eye design”. The eye pendant is probably related to Big Brother, while the red book basically confirmed it was one of Leitner’s chaos books. I already suspected this considering Gerard was after that, but glad to see an implicit confirmation.

Speaking of the supplement, Jon gained access to the tapes in Gertrude’s room and I’m glad about that because we will surely find something cool and scary. But I’m also sure that’s the easiest way for Jon to get himself killed, so I’m a bit scared for his life.

Also, how weirdly cute is this part?

“I only ever spoke to Gertrude once or twice during her time as archivist. I-I was very new. I don’t remember what her voice sounded like.”

Jon sounds so young, here. Almost like a child. I mean, I imagined he was in his thirties or something, but I actually have no idea how old is he. Is he younger? How old is he?

Also, it’s just nice to see this little moment of him being so… soft and human, with his predecessor. He barely knew her, he barely spoke to her, he probably looked at her and saw just an older, stern figure. But now, he’s in the same position. They became a lot closer than they ever were. It’s fascinating - and there’s a lot of potential for angst too, so I’ll brace myself for it.

_______________________________

MAG 44 - Tightrope

A statement recorded by Gertrude! it was such a pleasant surprise to finally hear her voice! And she sounds amazing <3

As soon as I heard it was a statement from a guy in Algasovo, I felt it was connected to something I already knew. I remembered there was a circus mentioned in season 1 and, after a little bit of research, I found it: MAG 24, Цирк другого: the Circus of the Other. Ringmaster Gregor Osinov and organist Nikolai Denikin - whose granddaughter recorded the abovementioned statement.

Sure, here it’s called Другой Цирк, which is correctly translated as “Another Circus”. So my question is: which is correct? Did the circus change its name? MAG 44 is from the 70s, while the photo mentioned in MAG 24 was from 1948. Maybe the circus was called Цирк другого, then it changed its name after Denikin left and became Другой Цирк. Anyway, it was very interesting to read and I was so sure it was the smae circus mentioned before (despite the different names). So when Jon mentioned Gregor Osinov, my smile grew bigger than ever :D

Speaking of Jon, he asks some very interesting questions: Gertrude knows a lot more than it seems. And she didn’t finish recording everything in the archive. Why? Was that her way to oppose Big Brother/the Lukas family/the “crimson curse”? Maybe Big Brother can “eat” these statements, so by stopping her recordings, Gertrude was voluntarily leaving it hungry, as a sort of “fuck you, I won’t get eaten by you” kind of thing.

Or maybe she just wanted to not do her job anymore, thus provoking the Lukas family to fire her for not doing anything. Or maybe she was just too busy trying to find a way to escape, to record statements like an insane you-know-who who keeps recording stuff because he wants to find out the truth even if the truth can get him killed.

Did someone find Jon’s tapes? Or is he in full Jipper mode and maybe the drawer wasn’t even ajar? In any case, now he’s hiding them too, which reminds me of Gertrude and her secret hidden library and I don’t like the parallel at all. I don’t want to see Jon dead on a chair, in a room, surrounded by his secret library.

_______________________________

MAG 45 - Blood Bag

Another meh statement, even if this time I’m quite perplexed by the weird turn of events.

I mean, once Dr. Thompson sold his syringe, there was a sudden spike in heat, the ‘haemoglobish’ became real blood and the mosquitoes decided to wait for their moment to kill the doctor. They’re a lot of weird consequences and they don’t seem too connected either - especially the heat. Why is there always some heat involved?

While speaking of the mosquitoes planning revenge… yes, this is the most plausible thing. These little bitches always plan revenge on everyone.

So, the doctor’s buyer is “Indonesian, I think, or Samoan”. It’s Salesa, isn’t it? Yep, Jon confirms it. Well, I suppose he will be another recurring character. And if Gerard can smell Leitner’s book, Salesa can smell any supernatural shit and make a profit from it. In this case, I suppose the syringe was a real lucky charm or whatever, considering how everything degenerated once the doctor got rid of it.

“Can’t stand mosquitoes. Horrible things.”

You and me, Jon. You and me. Glad to know that, even if he’s in full Jipper mode, he can still be very relatable.

I know Jon was super paranoid with Martin, but he might have a point about Tim. I mean, a guy with this resume decides to work in a place that isn’t so appreciated by normal people? And he doesn’t seem too interested in the supernatural either. Why is he here, to bribe people to get info and do whatever the fuck he wants? If that’s the reason… honestly, mood. I loved him before, I would just appreciate him even more for the power move.

Jonathan Sims, Master at Hiding Things, gets caught by Martin in 0.2 seconds because he’s so clever to record his paranoid thoughts in the middle of a working day, in a place where everyone can enter. A genius.

But now I’m curious to know where he will go to record these statements. I can almost see him, all crammed up into a closet, while Martin searches for him with a cup of tea in his hand.

_______________________________

MAG 46 - Literary Heights

Oh gosh, I LOVE this chapter.

First of all, as soon as Michael Crew was mentioned, I immediately checked the previous chapters and here he was: MAG 17, the Boneturner’s Tale. Also, if my last theory is correct, Michael Crew and Supernatural Micheal are the same thing. And you know what? I think this statement confirmed it. But one thing at a time.

Second: my man Leitner! Ex Altiora my beloved! We finally know where it was and what it is! It’s a poem and I ADORE the plot. It’s such a perfect mix of weird, suspense and desperation… uuuurgh, I’m so mad I can’t read it, because this plot can be developed into a fantastic story.

And now, let’s put together all the pieces we have:

Michael Crew is interested in the Leitner.

Michael Crew has “a branching pattern of white scar tissue” on himself.

Jon reminds us that, in MAG 4, Mr. Swain said there was a “woodcut of the dark night sky, with the branching, arching design of the Lichtenberg figure” inside Ex Altiora.

This drawing isn’t mentioned by Mr. Knox here.

Lichtenberg figures have a branched shape, similar to the shape of lightning discharges, and appear on the surface/inside insulating materials during dielectric rupture. But they can also appear on lightning victims.

They are also “natural phenomena which exhibit fractal properties”.

In MAG 4, Mr. Swain says Michael Crew got struck by lightning when they were kids.

Michael Crew is surrounded by smells associated with lightning and electric discharges.

Michael Crew has been followed by a tall, thin figure, “its limbs angular and branching”.

Supernatural Michael has angular and branching limbs.

Supernatural Michael Is associated with fractals too.

The figure also “crackled and fizzed, lit by a strobing white light, as though the lightning was within the room itself”.

When Michael Crew reaches the bell tower, the prays something with the words “altiora,” “vertigo,” and “the vast”. then he says “I’m yours”, leaps through the open window and disappears.

Now, here’s my explanation:

Micheal Crew was followed by a supernatural shit. This supernatural shit was the same immense figure mentioned in the poem of Ex Altiora.

Micheal probably came into contact with it when he was a child and got struck by the lightning. Since then, he started to resonate with Vertigo/the Vast just like Jane Prentiss started to resonate with the Hive.

(Also, since Jane Prentiss’ supernatural shit was “the hive”, I think I’ll call this one “the vast” because it was a bit odd that he specifically said “the vast” with a definite article)

So, since Michael Crew came into contact with the Vast and started to resonate with it, he was accompanied by smells associated with lightning/electric discharges and he started to search for all kinds of magic books, trying to find a way to properly connect with it/being consumed by it, just like Jane Prentiss did with the Hive.

In Prentiss’ case, she connected through the wasps’ nest and got “consumed” by the Hive. Michael Crew tried to do the same by using different methods mentioned in the books, but failed. He had to find something stronger to connect to the Vast. And that something turned out to be a tale featuring the Vast itself, told by my man Leitner.

So Michael got it and waited for a storm. And as soon as the storm came, he ran towards it, calling for the Vast. And when the Vast appeared, it looked like that figure similar to an actual lightning.

Michael sang/prayed for it (please notice how Mr. Knows refers to his words like a chant first and a prayer later, just like Jane Prentiss talked about the song of the Hive. These little shits truly talk through songs) and closed his invocation, by saying “I’m yours”, which can be also read as “I give my body to you”.

And so, he jumped. And by doing that, he gave his body to the Vast and the Vast became him. And that turned him into Michael the Supernatural Shit, also known as Best Boyo of this series.

If all of this is true, then:

it’s very cool

his name isn’t Mr. Distortion, but Mr. Vast. Still cool, but Best Boyo is better :P

And if this is true, that also means my previous Leitner theory was completely wrong. His books don’t turn you into the protagonist: his books are about the real, actual supernatural shits living in this world and by getting the right one, it’s easier to connect to the supernatural shit in question. They’re like… facilitators, in a way.

That also puts into question Gerard’s work. What is he actually doing, by searching and destroying all Leitner’s books? Maybe he’s saving the world, because without books it’s more difficult to connect to these supernatural shits. But destroying the books doesn’t mean getting rid of the supernatural shits themselves and these books might actually be useful to recognize all supernatural shits and “catalog” them. I don’t know, I need more info about these two guys and what they’re actually doing.

And yes, there’s also Spider Mom taking possession of the hidden tunnels of the institute and she’s probably the one who opens the door and maybe she even walks around in her human form and that’s very cool too. Just… how fricking cool is this statement?! I think it’s among my top favorites, along with MAG 2, MAG 5, MAG 20, MAG 26 and MAG 39.

(Now that I think about it, I should probably do a top of my favorite statements once I finish the whole series. It would be fun.)

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MAG 47 - The New Door

Holy shit. Just holy shit.

I thought this was just a simple statement. A statement featuring a tall blonde guy. And yes, I was 200% sure it was Michael. But I just though he appeared and did some weird supernatural shit.

For a while, he did it: he made a door in that house, Mrs. Richardson got lost inside it for three days and escaped just because one of the mirrors was “empty” and didn’t reflect Michael. So she did what everyone who met a supernatural shit did: she went to the Institute. My theory about “hiding behind a bigger predator” seems even more convincing.

I loved the little moment when Mrs. Richardson asked Jon if he believed her and Jon admitted that yes, he believes her. It’s a tiny exchange of words, but it’s enough to show the massive change in Jon from season 1. Before, he would’ve been more stern and showed more skepticism (fake or real whatsoever). But now, after all he went through, he’s showing a softer, more empathetic side. Jon is truly evolving as a character.

And speaking of characters, time to talk about the real shit and time to overanalyze everything:

Michael’s voice is perfect

First of all, I ADORE Michael. Sorry Tim, you deserve the world, but Michael’s soft laughs and the way he gently mocks Jon because he’s this powerful supernatural shit while Jon is just a mere human it’s just too adorable. His voice is too adorable. And the distortion effect makes him very creepy - but still extremely adorable. I love him so much.

Domains?

This part about domains is very fascinating and, in a way, it confirms my theory about the supernatural shits having territories like mafia bosses.

But it seems like they don’t simply take a place and own it. It’s a bit like they are these places. As if these domains are an appendix of them. So I suppose Michael doesn’t simply “make doors pop up”: he is the doors and the corridors. such a cool concept, it makes these supernatural shits look even more eldritch and… well, supernatural. Love it.

But also: if my theory about Big Brother is correct, does that mean Big Brother isn’t just hidden in the Magnus Institute, but is the Institute? Mmmh, I need more details.

It’s also very interesting how Michael refers to Mrs. Richardson as “the Wanderer”. Since it doesn’t seem like Mrs. Richardson is a supernatural shit, I suppose that “the Wanderer” is a name to identify the people who enter the domain of a supernatural shit and become food. But since calling them “food” isn’t nice, Michael (and maybe other supernatural shits) opted for a more sophisticated name, like “the Wanderer”.

Also, Michael reconfirms he’s a poet and I love him so much.

The concept of identity (and maybe my theory already failed?)

That’s another interesting part. Michael considers itself a “what”, because “it requires a degree of identity I can’t ever retain”. And this connects to its domain: since it’s so huge and can “overlap” reality by creating new spaces inside it (inanimate spaces), it was probably easier for Michael to identify itself as a “what” rather than a “who”.

But this distorted appearance made me think: wait, probably my brand new theory about Michael as Mr. Vast is completely wrong.

If Michael’s power is being distorted and making weirdly long, distorted corridors (that confirms Michael was probably the voice who told Jon to leave, when he explored the tunnels in MAG 41), that doesn’t line up with the previous statement, where the Vast’s power was related to lightning and to being this colossal figure.

At the same time, Michael laughs with a weird, distorted effect as if it’s more people in one figure and this detail seems coherent with my theory.

So I think there are two possible solutions now:

my theory is correct and Michael can both be hugely vast and very distorted

my theory is wrong and Michael Crew just offered himself to another supernatural shit

Or maybe the correct option is:

3. Mr. Sims is the biggest troll of all mankind and he made a series in which every supernatural shit is named Michael and this explains why everyone is named Michael and why Michael is such a familiar name. If this is true I would respect him even more.

Jokes aside, I really need more information now. Especially I need Michael (this one at least) to talk about itself and its powers. And maybe all other Michaels should talk a bit about themselves too. At least enough to confirm if my theory is right or wrong.

A war?!

No, wait, you cannot drop this bomb, tease us like this, then leave. Stay here and explain!

Okay, so the Institute is important. It should stay where it is, because losing it would bring imbalance in the hidden war that’s going on - between supernatural shits, I suppose.

In MAG 41, Jon said the Archives stand on an ex-prison, built around the concept of the Panopticon. This could explain why this place is needed: a place from where you can spy on everything and everyone is a great leverage in a war.

My question is: what are the sides of this war? I suppose that one side is Big Brother and maybe the weird supernatural fog of the Lukas family, but the other? The supernatural meat? And the spider gang? On which side was Jane Prentiss with the Hive?

And what are they all fighting for? To take over the world? To eat as many humans as possible? Or maybe the “All Michael theory” is correct and since all these shits are named Michael, they decided that the last one standing will officially take the name Michael and all others will have to choose another name? All while Best Boyo Michael decided “fuck this shit, I’ll keep this name anyway because it’s just a name and my identity is more than this”?

You know what? I love the All Michael Theory. It’s stupid and yet it somehow works. If it’s true, it would immediately turn the whole series from dramatic to comic, but I love it.

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MAG 48 - Lost in the Crowd

Oooh, a statement settled in Italy! Never visited Genoa, but now it deserves a visit. After all, I already think about this goddamn series every time I see a spider and have to kill it, so why not going to Genoa and fearing weird supernatural shits? Apparently, they love to go anywhere. Was this one taking a vacation?

Speaking of vacations: honestly, I never expected to see my man Gerard, rebel punk and goth, chilling in Italy with a bright shirt on. I hope you’re also wearing some nice shorts, Gerard. And no combat boots. Or sandals with socks. The Italian fashion police can be way worse than any supernatural shits.

So, my man went to Mrs. Nunis, told her she was “marked” and told her to think about her mother. To remember her. To, you know, feel less alone. I immediately thought about Naomi and how she too felt alone, when the mysterious fog tried to “eat” her in MAG 13.

But this time there wasn’t really a fog: the sunny day simply became overcast. So maybe the fog isn’t supernatural but… the clouds are? But then, what about the weird fog from MAG 33? Or maybe, the fog simply hides the real supernatural shit, which is this weird faceless crowd. And this time the fog was on vacation too.

Or maybe Italy’s weather is too warm for the thick UK fog, so the fog dispersed and left only the crowd. I’ll admit it, it would be hilariously funny if a supernatural shit is simply an atmospheric element end you can get rid of it by traveling far enough or by using, idk, an electric fan.

So one question remains: what was Gerard doing in Italy? Was he truly searching for a Leitner? Or maybe he was really taking a vacation? I like to think it’s the second one: unlike Jon “Trust No One” Sims and Martin “Self-preservation is overrated” Blackwood, my man Gerard knows when it’s time to get the fuck out and take a vacation. So he left all the supernatural shits and books to chill on a beach, take a cafè and eat some real food.

Great choice, Gerard, Genoa is a beautiful place.

Speaking of the supplement, Jon realized Michael was warning him about Sasha! But unfortunately, thanks to Not!Sasha’s evil powers, Jon cannot understand what the problem with her is. Damn you, evil imposter! Give Sasha back!

Jon “Jipper” Sims, Master of Secrecy, after being caught by Martin in 0.2 seconds, got caught both by Martin and Tim again and they both immediately realized Jon was spying on them. So they reported him to Elias.

See? See where “trust no one” brings you, Jon? Please, stop spying on them like a creep. why don’t you start spying Elias, instead? He’s the most suspicious guy that ever walked on this planet, why the fuck are you wasting time with your team when you have him?

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MAG 49 - The Butcher’s Window

I read the title and I immediately was: “The meat is back, isn’t it?”

But it’s not just the meat, it’s our old friend Jared! And he does incredibly weird creepy things! And I like them, because they’re creepy without being gorey. You know, it’s just too easy to use gore: scaring without gore is harder and I appreciate it.

Also, what the fuck is the weird… underground superleech he’s feeding? Is that the boneturner? Is this the name of this supernatural shit? After all, every supernatural shit seems to have a name that starts with the definite article: the hive, the vast, the boneturner.

And if we add up all the things we discovered until now, that means that Jared became the Boneturner/the body of the Boneturner thanks to the Leitner’s book that “facilitated” the connection and, since he became that thing, that thing also became him. So the underground creepy superleech is still part of him and by feeding it, he’s feeding himself too.

You know, the whole process of feeding it was creepy, fine, but it made me smile too because… come on, it looks like a guy throwing snacks at his dog. That’s funny.

But not as funny as the mental image of this weird superleech I got, that resembles something like this:

This is a sea lamprey. It’s not a leech, but it’s the closest animal to represent what I imagined. And yes, this is a real living creature on this planet. You’re welcome, glad to know this will haunt your dreams too.

A-ah! We finally got more info about Elias! I knew it was weird that he managed to go from filing clerk to head of the Institute, but I had no idea he became head of the Institute just in five goddamn years. What did he do, did he kill everyone else? Did he kill James Wright too? Did this man also “die on the job” as Gertrude?

Also, how absolutely, insanely funny is it to think that Elias was a pothead? I read it and I was like… what? This guy?! I always imagined him like a posh guy and now you tell me he was smoking crack or whatever? That’s too funny, I love that and it would be hilarious if that’s the reason why he killed everyone else: not because of the Lukas family, not because of the supernatural shits: just because he wants to hide his past.

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MAG 50 - Foundations

Oooh, another old statement addressed to Jonah Magnus! I suppose that’s how the Institute started: with this guy walking back and forth inside his house, surrounded by creepy stories. A bit like Jon now. And nope, I don’t like this parallel.

The story itself is very meh. It’s not really creepy nor scary, just “mysterious guy appears outside an office” and “fingers on a stone uuuh”.

This statement probably served to remind us about Robert Smirke’s existence. Jon probably forgot, but I remember that in season 1, he said Tim mentioned him an architect he was obsessed with and this architect was Robert Smirke. So I suppose this guy is important.

We also have Sir George Gilbert Scott now. When Mr. Kempthorne said Scott’s projects had odd symmetries and seemed claustrophobic, they reminded me of the underground tunnels of the Institute. Is it possible that one of these guys is responsible for the construction of the ex Millbank prison? I suppose only time will tell.

I died laughing when Tim thought Jon was hitting on Basira. How he went from “That woman is weird” to “Good job boss, get her”. He’s the best, I love him.

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In conclusion

Oh my, what a start for season 2! We have more Michaels than ever, too many theories and lots of mysteries I still can’t grasp.

I want more. I want to know more about Michael, I want to find out which theory is correct. Is Michael Crew one of the many identities of Best Boyo Michael? Is Michael vast and distorted or they’re two different Michaels? Is every supernatural shit named Michael? Is Elias just a pothead trying to survive in a world full of supernatural shits? Is Gerard still on holiday?

We’ll meet back soon with ten more chapters.

>> Next post

(How about a coffee? ☕)

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