#Not just that Stede doesn't love him anymore

[candied-cae]

There's one thing that’s actually so beautiful about it, Ed starts to struggle for his life the moment someone tries to keep him there.

Before he even knows it’s Stede - maybe he hopes - but in that second before he knows, all he feels is "Someone out there just took the cloth off my face. Someone out there is standing by my bedside. Someone out there is waiting for me to come back."

And then it is Stede. It is Stede's voice calling for him to come back. And that means so much more that the rock unties itself from his hips as soon as he hears Stede say "I'm here, Ed."

And that's when his mind supplies the image of Merman-Stede swimming up to greet him with a fond smile.

Because knowing that Stede found his way back to him, knowing he was the one waiting on him, knowing the love wasn't wholly lost was what it took for him to stop dragging himself down. To let himself resurface and try again.

I know merman stede is the headline but can we appreciate how ed opened his eyes and started struggling the second stede uncovered his face????? And how when stede says his name, it sounds like ed is trying to say 'stede!' underwater?????

[xoxoemynn]

I don't know if it's just because I was bracing myself for something far worse, or because David Jenkins has made it clear that the show is the relationship so there's nothing to fear long-term, but I actually left those episodes feeling pretty good about Ed and Stede? No, break ups aren't fun, obviously, but

we got even more confirmation how much they love each other and how their instinct is to protect and look out for one another

we had both of them boosting each other up

Ed shared some of his fears and anxieties and communicated his feelings

Ed is doing something about it

Could that conversation have gone better? Absolutely. But they're 14-year-old boys. They love each other, they have so much in common, but when it comes to piracy, they're in very different stages of their lives.

Ed doesn't want to hold Stede back, but he doesn't want that life anymore. He doesn't want to put himself in that situation, and he doesn't want to get hurt again when (he assumes) Stede chooses a life of piracy over being with him.

Ed has so much trauma to work through. He knows that, but he doesn't know how, he just knows he has to "do something different."

All of these are actually really huge steps. It presents itself as conflict, and it is one. A BIG one. But it's an important one for them to go through if we're going to have Ed and Stede really thrive in their relationship, and be truly content both as a couple and as individuals.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Wait wait wait because fuck-

When Ed and Stede fight to reach each other across the beach, they're obviously armed. It's a whole thing. Ed's got a sword, Stede has a sword and a gun.

But they lose them when they reach each other. Stede seems to sheath his sword, but Ed just fucking drops his on the sand. You can even see Ed's boot hit the sword he's dropped when they reach each other.

And yes obviously part of this was because they wanted this scene to be intimate and sweet and they needed to hold each other like this. It's also very cute because it works with what we know about these two; when they're together, they feel safe, like nothing can hurt them, and when they reach each other they immediately think "welp, don't need these anymore" and lose the weapons because the most important thing is holding each other.

But it also really, really works, because it underscores Ed's biggest moment of character development this whole season: violence is a tool for love. He can use it to fight his way back to the man he loves, to protect him, and when he reaches him, he doesn't have to keep holding it. It's not an immutable part of him. He can drop it.

[areyoudoingthis]

This shot makes me completely insane. Ed's wanted to bury the Kraken and Blackbeard for so long, but now he's literally and symbolically digging himself up from the depths, he's swimming all the way to the bottom on purpose to drag himself back out.

And he does it in part because he's just been told "If you were ever good at anything, go and do that", and then rowed himself back into a nightmare, ships burning everywhere, Stede missing, and British soldiers harassing him while he's barely coping with what he's seeing. Maybe at first this is about bringing the Kraken back out of anger and dissociation, but that's why what happens next is so important. Because whatever his motivations are in this moment, he's doing something. The last time he was underwater he was drowning and Stede's presence saved him, this time he's taking action and doing whatever he can to fight back. And anger is only part of that, has always only been part of what moves Ed to violence.

Blackbeard and the Kraken have always been fueled by love, and fear, and yes, rage against unjust situations that made Ed feel helpless and trapped, and then left him feeling even worse for fighting back. And that last bit is what changes this time around and allows Ed to reintegrate, because for the first time, he's not alone anymore to deal with the aftermath, he's not a kid without a family, he's not a man crying alone in secret in an empty room without anyone to console him.

After he digs himself up, he emerges fully dressed on the shore, Edward Teach literally reborn on a beach at last, leathers back on and determined to do whatever it takes to find Stede. And it's such a powerful shot: he's all in black against the white surf, dripping wet hair completely obscuring his features and trailing tentacle shaped rivulets of water in front of his face.

The next shot we see is his shadow self, his dark, blurry reflection on the sand. The only bit of Ed's actual body we get are his feet stepping determinedly on the wet sand, making his way back to land and to Stede and towards his full self (although he hasn't realized this last bit yet).

But it's not until he finds the soldiers reading Stede's letter -and this is such a lovely representation of how the core of the show is the relationship between these two men- that all the parts of him are finally able to integrate into a single person when Ed embraces the Kraken and Blackbeard and Ed as being of equal value. It's reading the adoring, unhesitating declaration of Stede's love that allows Ed to redefine himself, to see his darker parts in a different light, the light Stede has cast on his life.

He reads the letter, realizes the depth of Stede's love for him, understands he's really committed to Ed for good (in permanent ink), that he didn't push him away by showing him his trauma as he feared, that sharing the story he's never told anyone else about his first and worst act of violence didn't make Stede reject him, that Stede loves him and wants him in his life for good. He has a short cry about it while he reads and processes.

And then he roars "you wrote me a lovely letter" and charges. A lot has been said about how angry in love the line sounds, and yes, he is angry, angry that he almost lost Stede again, angry that the British soldiers would mock the letter, angry that they'd hurt Stede and that they'd think they can do whatever they want just because they have the power, think they can separate them again after everything they've been through.

Ed has been afraid of his anger for so long, made up a tale and a whole different persona to hide it behind, but his anger has always been born of love, of the need to keep his loved ones safe, of rage against abuse and injustice, and this is what he needed to be able to see in order to start healing.

He's in love, Stede's in danger, he needs his protection, and Ed offers it unflinchingly and doesn't hate himself for it this time, sees the part of him that is capable of killing not as monster but as loving protector at last. Because the British are abusing their entirely illegitimate authority, and the man he loves is in trouble and may even be dead, and this isn't even a question for Ed, he'll fight for him.

And once he's safe he'll drop his weapons at their feet to kiss him and tell him what he's finally become able to say: he loves him. He's maybe beginning not to hate himself, and he loves Stede. And Stede reaffirms what he wrote in the letter, tells him that he knows, that it isn't Ed-Blackbeard-Kraken that's a dick, but life.

Is this arc done? No, of course not. Healing happens in stops and starts, it takes a long time, and that's why DJ has said from the beginning that OFMD was always meant to be three seasons long; the last season is going to be all about Ed and Stede dealing with their issues so they can grow and heal. But they were always meant to do it together, because that's when they're strongest, that's when they're able to shed a light on the other's darkest bits and help him see them in a kinder, loving way.

This was an emotionally charged step in Ed's journey of growth and self acceptance, but the issue will probably come back up in the future, especially now that he and Stede are slowing down and taking time to process their mountains of trauma and everything they've been through in a very condensed amount of time.

But this is still an incredibly significant moment for Ed. He's gone from panicking and hiding under a blanket in a bathtub to throwing parts of himself overboard to digging them up from the bottom of the sea towards the shore and the light, and wielding them intentionally to fight for what he loves.

[edwardteachswombtattoo]

Another take I saw going around when Season 2 was still airing (and I've seen snippets of it popping up to this day, it rises and falls with the Discourse), was that Izzy was "protecting the crew from Ed".

Look. I'm not getting into all the many many examples of that not being true, because people more eloquent than me have made posts talking about this. The short version is that we never see any on screen evidence of Ed physically harming the crew until he goes fully suicidal and forces them to kill him. Up until that point, he's mostly moping around in his cabin, snorting rhino horn (which is textually treated like cocaine) to get him through raids, drinking alone, crying, and playing with the cake toppers, and overworking the crew. Izzy steps in at the last possible second, to stop Ed from literally killing the crew and himself (and by extension Izzy). Even if Ed was harming the crew (and let's be clear, we have no evidence he was), why would Izzy care??? That's just typical pirate captain shit, according to Hornigold and Ned Low. And Izzy very much approves of "typical pirate shit", it's the reason he begs the crew to "just kill him" instead of saving his life after Ed shoots him. Because what's the use in a First Mate critically injured who might not be able to fight/go on raids anymore? Useless crew members get discarded, that's Izzy's pirate philosophy.

And speaking of Izzy's pirate philosophy.

Izzy didn't save/protect the crew. Stede did.

The crew are overworked, miserable, distraught, grieving the people they've lost and people they might never see again. They care about each other so much. And what do they do? Jim tells Fang a story to cheer him up. Jim and Archie refuse to fight to the death, choosing love over violence. They save Izzy's life even though Izzy is literally begging them to kill him, because Izzy might be a piece of shit but he's still a member of their crew. And that must make Izzy so angry, if he even realizes. Stede isn't around but his personal philosophy and ideals are so strong that even when he leaves the ship he doesn't leave the ship. Stede's influence is all over The Revenge. Ultimately, it was found family that protected the crew. Not Izzy.

[adickaboutspoons]

So there's several posts going around lately that seem to be dancing around the same proposition - that being that Ed is violence-averse altogether, rather than specifically killing-averse. While it's important to always keep the fact that Ed is no more violent than any other character on the show (and a good deal less violent than some), and that his use of violence is extremely considered and not the result of uncontrolled rages, denying that he would, has, and does commit acts of violence, and willingly, and sometimes even enjoys it, is just demonstrably wrong and elides a significant part of his character. When Ed is discussing "packing it all in" with Stede in 1x4, the reasons he give have nothing to do with being weary of or uncomfortable with the expectation of violence demanded by his position as a pirate, but because he's bored because "it's not a challenge anymore" because people don't fight back once they see Blackbeard's flag. He "loves a good maim." He genuinely has a blast with Jack and all his Jackassery. He gleefully spoke about mugging a guy for a dinghy. He thought the Knife Parade was a fun game until Fang told him his experience was not universal. He hands over a big fuck-off knife with the treasure he gives to the urchins, so clearly doesn't have a problem with using violence to defend what's yours. When he says to Stede "I'm not sure I want to go back to the old days of getting drunk all day and biting heads off turtles and making some poor bloke eat his toes for a laugh" that's not the same thing as saying he's forsaking his piratically violent ways and doesn't want to use violence ever again. The specific mention of all-day drunkenness and turtles calls back to the kind of shenanigans he got up to while Jack was around - and thus is a rejection of that kind of mindless violence for violence's sake; a prospect we had already witnessed him expressing discomfort with when Jack brought up what a wild man Ed used to be at brekkie. After all, part of the "most fun [he's] had in ages, years... maybe ever" has involved showing Stede how to "use a little oomph" and flirtatiously swordfight (both moments included in Stede's "what does it feel like to fall in love" mental montage) - violence as a means to procure a desired outcome, and with as little actual bloodshed or permanent injury as possible, but by no means not none. The show is so careful to never condemn the use of violence wholesale - like, at no point is the message a facile "violence is never the answer". It condemns certain types of violence, usually specifically those enacted large-scale by oppressive, colonialist social structures, but also cruelty for cruelty's sake. Outside of that, though, violence is a tool, and thus is only as "good" or "useful" as the task to which it is being applied. Ed is a master craftsman - he will use the tools at his disposal deftly, and, yes sometimes take joy or pride in his work. And that's not a bad thing, nor does it make him a bad person.

[ebenelephant]

it's been ages now but i'm kind of really fucking mad still. ofmd s2 fucked the characters so hard imo – and that's not just izzy, even though i do love him and yeah his death was shitty. what the fuck do you mean stede is being more selfish than ever at his crew's expense? what the fuck do you mean everyone's being shitty and dismissive over lucius's trauma? what the fuck do you mean ed doesn't live and learn and grow? what the fuck do you mean all the polyamory's gone? and you introduce these badass female characters only to kind of treat them like shit? fuck man. and it's a bummer because this was such a major fandom for me for a couple years. i have an ongoing fic that i'd plotted out all the way to the sequel epilogue and i've been stuck a third of the way through since may last year because i just haven't got a heart for the show anymore. the only thing that's stopping me from dropping the fic is the fact that a handful of people actually give a shit about it. that, and the fact that i give a shit about it still; that i have my ending and it means so much to me, and the sheer fucking spite that i will do better by these characters.

[lightbluetown]

looking back, i'm still really happy with izzy's death. a lot of different opinions have been floating around and, hey, this is mine. hell, his death is one of the main reasons i love this season so much

because season 2 is about ed reclaiming his own identity. he has to become the worst version of blackbeard in order to eventually become the best version of ed. ever since the very beginning he's been yearning for blackbeard's death. yet "blackbeard" isn't just ed's dark side-- it's a two-man-team with ed as the face and izzy holding the reins

in his final moments, izzy admits that he saw the façade of "blackbeard" as a shelter for his relationship with ed. a place where he was guaranteed to have control, where someone would always need him. he did everything in his power to protect "blackbeard" so that nothing could get in between what he had with ed

but "blackbeard" was always a ticking time bomb. not only did izzy not listen to ed, he didn't let ed listen to his own self. he used ed's weaknesses to serve his own interests. it was just a loop of izzy hurting ed and ed hurting him back, but izzy desperately needed to maintain this. it was all he had

and here's my favorite detail in this scene: right after he says this line is when stede comes back on deck. the weird fancy man who came out of nowhere and freed ed from the shackles of "blackbeard", who inadvertently destroyed izzy's world, silently walks in the background as izzy says:

he sees it now. as he told stede at jackie'z, he sees that stede is good for ed and that they balance each other out. he sees that loving stede is the best thing that's happened to ed. the darkness in ed that created "blackbeard" died during the storm and ed slowly started finding himself thanks to stede. sure, their relationship is awkward, but it's looking promising. izzy doesn't have a "blackbeard" to guard or to guide anymore. as he lets death drag him away, he's happy to take the last bit of "blackbeard" with him so ed can be completely free. having received so much love from his new family aboard the revenge, izzy is able to give ed and stede his blessing. it's a beautiful declaration of acceptance, repentance and encouragement

izzy, as a character, serves ed, who himself isn't even the main protagonist. for a supporting character to have an entire season build up to his death, all while allowing him to grow into the most comfortable and confident man he's ever been... getting to have closure and make amends... in my opinion, that's the greatest honor

[dragonlands]

There's so much negativity around Izzy's death so I wanted to address some of the points I keep seeing thrown around.

"Izzy's death was pointless"

No, he just had his big speech about how basically they can kill him but they cannot kill the movement. That is a clear paraller to a lot of real life protestors of unjustice. He died protecting the community, he died so the community could go on.

"Izzy's death made his healing pointless"

No it didn't. Healing is always good, feeling happiness and belonging are ALWAYS worth it. We never know how long we've got, doesn't mean we gotta stop trying to be better or happier. His healing was still real. It still mattered.

"Izzy's character arc was left unfinished, it's bad writing"

Oh my god. If you open any writing guide about how to write impactful deaths, and the first thing that comes up is to leave some part of their arc unfinished. And his arc did go through quite a beautiful line, sure there could've been more but his story didn't end like, mid arc. As a writer, of course you want to make the audience sad when a character dies. It's good storytelling. Good stories are supposed to make us feel.

"Izzy died on the arms of his abuser"

Where the hell did this idea come from? Ed and Izzy have been in a toxic codependent relationship way before this show started. You could argue that Izzy was Ed's abuser, but that is not the argument I want to make here. Yes, we saw Ed driven to madness shoot Izzy on screen, but we know Izzy's the one that forced him to be Blackbeart when he didn't want it anymore. There's turmoil all around them. But the final moment is them finally meeting as people, not as components of Blackbeard.

"Izzy's death was unnecessarily awful"

His death was sad, yes, but it was quite beautiful as far as deaths go. He was surrounded by family who cared for him. He was loved, and accepted as he is. He knew his legacy will be carried on.

"They killed off the only character that showed us healing is never too late"

Did we watch the same show? That begins with then unhappy 40+ year old Stede deciding it's finally time to reach for his dreams? Where we see Blackbeard slowly gaining back his humanity? Where Black Pete starts off as toxically masculine dude but ends up in a soft gay marriage? Where most of the crew wanted to mutiny but then they realized being soft is good, actually. Jim's whole purpose in life being revenge but them learning to let that go and instead concentrate on love and fun and family. And so on. Izzy's arc is beautiful, but he's not the only person healing who thought it was too late already.

"Izzy's death was bury your gays trope"

No, what, no. In a pirate show where everyobody is queer some queer people will die. Bury your gays is about only having one or few queer characters and killing them off while the straights get their happily ever afters. This is so far from that.

Also, I want people to be aware of the phenomenon, where creators of diverse shows are subjected to more critism than those of non diverse shows. If this intrests you, Sarah Z on Youtube made a great video on it called Double standards and diverse media. Our flag means death has given us so much, queer love story with a happily ever after, finding community, nonbinary character. And the creators have always been so kind to fans, so let's show them tht kindness back. Because critizicing this one aspect can easily turn to seeming like the whole story is just unwanted. That stories like Ed and Stede's aren't worth telling. And I'm so aftraid that will happen, when just now for the first time in years we are finally getting queer stories.

Also, I understand people are sad. I am sad too - Izzy was an amazing character and his death was sad but that's just. Good writing. You can grieve, but trying to turn it into a moral or dramaturgy issue is just not a good look. And attacking the creators of this wonderful show is just horrible.

Remember - this fandom is a safe space ship 🏴‍☠️🏳️‍🌈

[follows-the-bees]

Stede's journey wasn't centered on finding (romantic) love at the beginning. He set out to find himself, to find a community. (And it's beautiful that he gets that.)

But along the way he finds not only a best friend, but the love of his life: in that same person. Stede's journey is a blatant queer allegory: a man who has never fit into society, who is treated poorly for not fitting into *pick your societal norm*, who finds himself through community, fixing some of his past relations, but also discovering his sexuality: gay and demisexual.

Ed's journey is also about finding himself. About leaving a life that doesn't make him happy anymore and he too along the ways finds the love of his life.

Their journey together is about finding that person who gets them down to their neurons, first as a friends, then as a lover. Their journey is of being in love for the first time and all that that entails.

I mentioned above that Stede's sexuality can be read as demisexual; there are many beats along the way in canon that I think make this a strong read.

But I want to talk about the read of Ed as demiromantic. And this is just an interpretation, not canon fact.

We see that sex on the ship is casual. "Non-stop knocking ship." And we see that Ed is no stranger to sex. The marks on his skin during the stabbing skin alluding to past "stabbings."

But there's also an underlying touch-starved intimacy; he wants to be held by Stede so badly, that he gets him to stab him.

We see in the next season, stabbing as sexual again between Mary and Anne. But we also see that underlying loving affection between them later. The stabbing is also tied to emotion with these two couples.

We see more of the emotional intimacy between Ed and Stede, their friendship leading to a more emotional connection with the bathtub scene. Ed opens up to someone for the first time and then gets intimate physical touch, even getting more of it by placing his forehead on Stede's hand.

In the gravy basket Ed asks for the most basic of things to survive. And it's honestly sad when you remember that he is fighting to live, he wants to live, but he only gives himself the basics of it. Warmth, good food, and intercourse — with orgasms. This qualifier makes it clear that Ed has had unsatisfying sex. Him looking for emotional connections fits into the reason, especially since his entire journey is about emotional intimacy.

This episode with Anne and Mary is what really started to cement the Ed is demiromantic reading for me (again not canon, just an interpretation.) Ed and Stede are very private about their romantic/sexual lives. (Can I also take a sidenote to talk about how it's a breath of fresh air that their relationship is based on friendship!)

I know it's prevalent to say that Ed fell at the on-start but I don't think that's quite true. He was fascinated by Stede. Someone new and interesting and they connected emotionally right away, two sides of the same coin. Their friendship is what truly ties them together before their romantic relationships and certainly before sexual.

They both push back when anyone tries to bring up the sexual side of their relationship. Ed states "our private lives are our private lives" to his old friends Anne and Mary, which yes is funny, but is also very telling that Ed doesn't want to talk about those things. Stede is special, Ed is older, this thing between them is more than just idle gossip about sex lives between friends. When Spanish Jackie brings up the Swede as a "jackhammer," Ed also has an opportunity to bring up Stede if he wanted to chat, but he doesn't cause "our private lives our private lives."

This happens a third time when Izzy unceremoniously opens the curtains the morning after. Stede responds as he normally does to Izzy: offended, Ed looks annoyed but not surprised, since this has been established — Izzy getting into personally spaces — from the beginning.

After Ed and Stede are reunited, under the moonlight, the biggest time in season one we really see Ed looking at Stede with pure emotional vulnerability on his face, they kiss again. And Ed stops it, wanting to take it slow. I think this moment also adds to demiromantic Ed! He gets to hold hands, cuddle, talk about his day, both their days with each other. Cuddles and talks, romance and intimacy over sexual at this stage in their relationship.

Overall, Ed and Stede's relationship is built on their friendship. They like each other. They love each other. And I think both can be read as ace: Stede as demisexual and Ed as demiromantic.

Ed wanting emotional connection, romance his entire life, but just like the fine things, not thinking it's for him, that he gets that, only to find out he does! He gets to have romance! He gets to hold hands just to hold hands. He gets to take it slow without judgement! He gets to have sex with romance! And that man is going to be romanced! Good for him!

Their connection and journeys about being emotionally vulnerable with each other, being able to grow close with one another is beautiful.

If you disagree with this reading, cool. The amazing thing about this show is that sexuality is left open. Is Ed gay or bi? You decide! Is Frenchie ace? That's my reading! It's all up to interpretation.

[hiimcanadia]

Went to bed last night thinking about how good it's going to be for Ed and Stede to be safe to change their minds.

I like to think of Stede as demisexual, and his relationship with Ed as not only being the first time he's fallen in love, but the first time he's experienced any sexual attraction. So I think there's a version of their story where Stede sits Ed down at the start of their relationship and tells him that he's not really interested in sex, only to realize months later that maybe he is interested specifically in sex with Ed.

Similarly, I think Ed is someone who is usually really into sex, but every once and a while he'll go through a period of hating it. He doesn't want to have it, doesn't want to think about it, he might even be actively in the middle of it and suddenly not be able to go through with it anymore.

And that's going to be difficult for them, not only because they don't want to feel like they're disappointing/ lying to each other, but because I don't think either of them really had the space to change their minds much growing up. If they liked something one day and didn't the next, they were called bratty and annoying. They were told by the people around them that they had to pick one way to feel about everything and stick to it.

So I think it's going to be very healing for them to be in a relationship where they don't have to be like that. Stede can hate the idea of fisting until suddenly he wants to try it. Ed can really like blowjobs until all of the sudden he doesn't want to give them for a while. Even outside of sex, they can change their minds on what food they like, what color curtains they want in their living room, which sweaters are their favorites. And they can do that as many times as they want, and nobody is going to tell them that they're being erratic or difficult, because it's just the two of them, and they're determined to create a life together where they're safe to do whatever they want

[emptymasks]

no but izzy crying, the tears in his eyes building as he knows what everyone is saying about ed is true but he doesn't want to break and cry in front of them, but if he did they wouldn't laugh at him anymore because this isn't the same as everyone cackling 'dizzy izzy' and trying to throw him off the ship, this is them and their bonds of friendship and love extending towards him now, they care about him now, and he cares about them now, and if he wants them all to make it out of this alive he's got to kill off the part of him that's blackbeard's loyal little dog, and he's being hugged and his hand is being held and he's letting his hand being held, he's gripping the hand back just thinking about holding izzy's hand, thinking about the crew finding some wood from one of stede's fancy tables and crafting it into a prosthetic for his leg and making him a crutch, making padding from a mast to put on the top to make it more comfortable, later on one of them taking the time to carve out something that resembles a leg and foot, checking on his bandages as the wound heals, helping redress it, just people helping izzy and him finally understanding that it's okay to let people care about you and that it's okay to care about other people and just feeling as though he's got some sort of support system, some sort of family

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Emotional again today about how Ed and Stede are just the same person played in a slightly different key.

They are both expected to hide the most true and innate facets of their personality to be safe and avoid scrutiny. For Ed, this looks like putting on a performance and wearing a mask so consistently that he worries he doesn't even know who he is anymore. For Stede, he's utterly incapable of even pretending to be anyone but himself no matter how hard he tries.

They both depend on stories to get them through. Stede escapes into his books when he's so deeply miserable with his life, and Ed makes up stories about sea monsters to help him cope with what he's been forced to do.

They both grew up in a world that told them the kind of love they wanted isn't for them. Stede was straight-up told he couldn't marry for love; Ed grew up in a culture where his relationships with other men were marked up as nothing but "dalliances."

And despite it all, despite everything, they both have so much hope. Stede delights in sharing his clothes and books with Ed, even though he's been mocked for them in the past. Ed acts jaded sometimes, but this guy has so much hope it's incredible - he goes on and on about how it's impossible for people to change, but the second he's challenged, he's a convert. He already wanted to believe.

They were both drowning. And they saved each other, not just by being there with each other but by showing each other that there's another way they can live, just by being themselves.

[plantsjustwannahavefun]

"Izzy Canyon dwellers just want to turn him into an innocent victim who did nothing wrong!"

Actually my problem is that, in hindsight, Izzy didn't do enough wrong to justify the common interpretation of his relationship with Ed. In my book, the first time in the series he legitimately crossed over to villainous antagonist territory - someone you actually loved to hate for it even if you understood his reasons - was when he set the British Navy on the Revenge. That way he not only betrayed his integrity as a pirate by consorting with the common enemy of all pirates, but risked Ed's life too - cause, like, come on, that "plan" to send CJ to convince Ed to leave Stede was so far-fetched it barely counts as a plan. I don't buy Izzy ever looking at CJ and going "yep that seems like a smart, responsible, trustworthy man I could rely on for a delicate mind games operation like this". It was an act of sheer desperation on Izzy's part, but he still chose to do it. IMO this was actually worse than what he said to Ed in S1 finale. Although of course that was very nasty, too.

But the thing is, we don't actually have any info on what their relationship used to be like before S1. We were only ever shown, not told - and both times from Izzy's perspective: the first time in S01E04 during his resignation rant, which was very heartfelt and I'm sure a lot of it was true, but it's still one-sided, and the second time during his deathbed speech, which was, again, one-sided and this time biased in another direction - instead of airing his pent-up grievanced Izzy was putting most of the blame on himself.

Other than this, the entirety of Ed and Izzy's pre-S1 relationship gets extrapolated from one single episode, S01E04. The narrative itself seems to want us to see it as a microcosm of their usual long-standing dynamic, at least on the surface. We see Ed being depressed and suicidal, trying to open up to Izzy about it, and Izzy shutting him down and making him act like Blackbeard again. Since it's already clear that Ed and Stede are the main characters, we're primed to see Ed as the victim here and Izzy being an annoying, insensitive nag.

Except the context of those interactions changes everything. The context being that they are literally about to be attacked by the Spanish - something Ed knowingly brought on them with his decisive power as captain - and Ed is deliberately withholding crucial information from his own first mate and the rest of the crew, making them all think they're going to die and he isn't doing anything about it. Izzy wasn't just being a boring buzzkill not being excited for Ed when he showed him that ship model. He was actively panicking and trying to do his job asking Ed for orders so they don't all get slaughtered.

So, yeah, those are some very exceptional circumstances that don't say anything about their typical day to day interactions go when they're not in immediate mortal peril due to lack of communication. Was this the first time Ed ever told him about not wanting to be Blackbeard anymore? Izzy didn't seem very surprised, so probably not, but we don't know, and if Ed had confided in him before, we don't know how Izzy reacted - but I'd like to point out that this time he didn't ridicule Ed in any way, he simply pointed out that they were about to die if Ed didn't do anything. Does Izzy usually indulge Ed in the stuff he finds fun when they're not about to be killed? Again, we don't know, but Izzy's playfulness during that first confrontation with Stede in S01E02, and his whittling and jokes in S2 showed that he wasn't always as grouchy and joyless as he's made out to be. We actually saw him smile when Ed got excited about Buttons, too. Pretty sure if Izzy always shut him down about things like that, Ed would have stopped trying to share it with him long ago.

And, finally, there's one piece of this puzzle that doesn't seem to fit in with the rest at all. The show both told us and implied that Izzy couldn't let Blackbeard go because his own identity was too tied up in it, and because he idolised the glory of violent pirate lifestyle. But if that's the case, then why did he have no problem with Ed wanting to retire? Izzy literally gave him an enthusiastic thumbs up on the whole "kill Stede and steal his identity so he could live the rest of his life as a rich aristocrat" plan. If Izzy only admired Ed as a pirate, and was so hell-bent on keeping the Blackbeard persona alive, why was he ok with Ed retiring? How does this square up with the idea that Izzy had been keeping Ed chained to piracy?

I'd honestly hoped we would get some flashbacks of the two of them in S2, and then S3 before that hope died too, because there's still so much we're missing.

[areyoudoingthis]

need to make a separate post about this because the way Ed looks at Stede during Pete and Lucius' wedding is hitting me so hard again.

we began the season wirth Ed fully convinced that he was unloved, unloveable and incapable of love, the holy trifecta of breaking my heart into a million pieces. he was so convinced of these things that he tried to die about them.

and then stede finds him again, first as a mermaid in his fantasy and then the real thing, and he keeps telling him that he loves everything about him throughout the entire season. he praises his chin, his fish, makes love to him while love songs are sung and fireworks go off.

and by the end of the season Ed has finally stopped running away from himself and from Stede and their love and he's ready to tell Stede that he loves him, to believe that he can love him, that he's not too monstrous for love. and he's ready to embrace that Stede loves him back, that this man he views as this beautiful, bright person he once believed he would never be allowed to have actually sees him for who he is and chooses him and loves him.

and!!!! they don't just kiss and confess their love on the beach after they reunite, they don't just agree to retire to take it slow and heal together for a while. Ed looks at Stede during the ceremony where their friends are pledging a lifelong commitment to each other and finally allows himself to make some kind of plan about marrying him eventually, allows himself to believe he can have Stede in his life like that for good, forever. he doesn't need the red silk anymore because he has reached out and taken all the things he was once told he didn't deserve to have

[amuseoffyre]

Real Pirates

Got thinking last night about Stede and what was said to him in 2x06 and 2x07.

First off, let's look at the Ned Low stuff.

"You know, if you kill me, you are a real pirate. You're not an amateur anymore. See? That's why he likes you. It's because of your bumbling amateur status. You're like a pet, I think."

There's been a running thread of Stede not being a real pirate all the way from S1 - "I'm not a pirate, I'm an idiot" (1x01), "pirates, my arse" (1x02), "what the fuck is you supposed to be?" (1x03), "you will get to see how real pirates operate in the real world" (1x05), "not one of these store-bought kinds" (1x07), "it only applies to real pirates" (1x09).

Ned has fully pressed down on the big red trauma button that other characters have been hammering all the way through S1, that Stede has been trying to ignore, but here and now, he can't: Stede's biggest fear remains that he was not and never will be enough for Ed.

It's not the first time another pirate has compared Stede to a pet either: Izzy, Fang and Ivan all said the same back in 1x06. Whether Stede has put together the pieces about Doggy Heaven, I don't know, but once again, we're shown that here is someone who definitely doesn't understand what is happening between Stede and Ed.

As much as Stede tried to convince himself "I am adequate" (1x02), the fear is still there that he's never going to be sufficient. "I think your life is better without me" (2x01).

Despite Ned saying that Ed wants to keep him an amateur, he's hurt and he's angry and he's seen his crew and his lover put in harm's way, so Ned is never going to get off that ship alive.

But it's also very telling that the instant Stede kills him, he immediately flashes back to one of his biggest and most recurring childhood traumas: the day his father told him that killing was a man's work and that he would never amount to anything because he was a soft-handed weak-hearted lily-livered little richboy.

We see/hear it or have it alluded to in 1x01, 1x02, 1x04, 1x08, 1x09, 1x10, 2x03, 2x06.

Letting Ned Low live - and have the chance to come back for vengeance - was never a choice, but this is the point where Stede has crossed a line he had never crossed before. "Killing. Having to kill" (1x01) sent him into a panic spiral in episode 1 and I have no doubt that if we get/got S3, once the panic and chaos died down, it would have snuck up on him like all his other traumas.

But let's continue into 2x07, where Stede has had a night with the man he loves, knows he's kept him safe, and isn't thinking about that stuff. Only then people start praising him for it. This is the man who hasn't been praised for anything before. He's wanted approval and acceptance his whole life and finally, now, he's got it. "Bonnet's the fuckin' dude".

It overwhelms him completely, much the same way as the attention from the party-ship people gave Ed the dopamine hits and made him escalate his behaviour. Stede starts acting up, showing off and - most significantly - chooses to spend his time in the company of an older man in a blood-soaked leather apron who won't stop telling him how fantastic he is. Our man isn't just wearing his daddy issues on his sleeve, he's taking them out and buying them a drink while they give him their approval.

Which is why Ed's departure comes as such a shock for him. For the first time in his life, Stede is accepted and appreciated. Ed even encouraged him at first, but then Ed's own traumas surrounding the pirate world reared up their ugly head. "I don't wanna go back to the old days, drinking all the time or cutting a bloke's toe off and feeding it to him for a laugh" (1x09)

And it's not that they're at odds with each other is the thing. They're at odds with themselves. Ed is panic-spiralling because he sees Stede stepping so easily into the world that he has come to hate and wants to leave behind. But for Stede, it's not about being a pirate - it's about the acceptance and appreciation of who he is, because he's never actually had that before.

He's behaving in the ways that are getting him the approval he's never had in his life and moving further and further away from "I don't like drinking til I puke or throwing coconuts at peoples' heads". He's becoming the Calico Jack kind of pirate, getting roaring drunk and throwing things - fatally - at people because "then I said a cool thing and people laughed".

Only because they don't talk to each other in ways that they can each understand, Stede is left with the belief that maybe Ed did like him as an amateur and despite doing "a man's work" he is still not enough. Meanwhile Ed thinks Stede really wants this kind of life, when he knows Ed wants away from it, because he has no idea what Stede is getting from it all.

Our lads are both so tangled up in their own fears and anxieties that they don't stop to wonder why the other is acting the way they are. Stede logically knows Ed doesn't want to be a pirate, but can't see why his own behaviour would be upsetting to Ed. Ed is fully aware of who Stede is as a person, yet the fear of him becoming more like the pirates he grew up around is overwhelming because it's been his whole life for so long.

Their own fears are crashing up against each other, but neither of them ever want to talk it through. Stede hides behind politeness and neutrality instead of saying what he's feeling (although he has made big steps on this front in S2) while Ed is so used to masking his real wants and needs in hypotheticals and metaphors.

S3 was going to see all those things come to light. Ed had already made a start, sitting with himself, but there was still more to come. Stede's issues which had been bottled up and tucked away ("that's the worst thing you can do, Frenchie!" (1x01)) but the pressure was building and it was going to fizz out like an overshaken champagne bottle in the end.

OFMD - Childhood Trauma the TV show. aka how to write the impact of PTSD and cPTSD on people and the way it impacts their behaviour, modes of communication and the decisions they make.