#Not ZADR

[starlitvesper]

I do a lot of very publicly working through my traumas and hang-ups, as well as diving into things that are considered “gross” just because fiction is a sandbox for safely doing all of that. And I’m sometimes reticent to put my work on display BECAUSE I know people are going to make their moral judgements about me as a person from my writing.

But I’m getting very tired of that.

Most recently, I’ve been working out some thoughts about jealousy and manipulation, and what it means to encounter those things in someone and where the limits are on forgiveness. And it’s been both challenging and rewarding to explore that and write something where I think people are acting and responding in ways that are realistic for their characters and the world they’re in.

I’m choosing a more “palatable” example than some of the other stuff I’ve written, but all the same, the point is to explore an idea and tease apart the emotions and get past the disgust a lot of people have when encountering this stuff, and see how things play out. I’m not making a moral statement or casting judgment. It’s genuinely just … toss some guys in a situation and see what happens next. What’s an INTERESTING way for things to go?

But I could also be writing the most morally bankrupt slasher simply because it’s fiction and it’s not hurting anyone and people who want to feel those emotions in a safe and controlled way are free to engage and those who dislike that are free to stroll by.

And I think that’s my point with this ramble. Fiction is already a safe and controlled environment by its nature. It doesn’t need moral police stomping around trying to control it more or make it safer. YOU are the arbiter of YOUR experiences. If you hate adrenaline rushes or heights, you walk past the roller coaster. It’s that simple.

Do you think authors sometimes don't realize how their, uh, interests creep into their writing? I'm talking about stuff like Robert Jordan's obvious femdom kink, or Anne Rice's preoccupation with inc*st and p*dophilia. Did their editors ever gently ask them if they've ever actually read what they've written?

Firstly, a reminder: This is not tiktok and we just say the words incest and pedophilia here.

Secondly, I don't know if I would call them 'interests' so much as fixations or even concerns. There are monstrous things that people think about, and I think writing is a place to engage with those monstrous things. It doesn't bother me that people engage with those things. I exist somewhere within the whump scale, and I would hope no one would think less of me just because sooner or later I like to rough a good character up a bit, you know? It's fun to torture characters, as a treat!

But, anyway, assuming this question isn't, "Do writers know they're gross when I think they are gross" which I'm going to take the kind road and assume it isn't, but is instead, "Do you think authors are aware of the things they constantly come back to?"

Sometimes. It can be jarring to read your own writing and realize that there are things you CLEARLY are preoccupied with. (mm, I like that word more than concerns). There are things you think about over and over, your run your mind over them and they keep working their way back in. I think this is true of most authors, when you read enough of them. Where you almost want to ask, "So...what's up with that?" or sometimes I read enough of someone's work that I have a PRETTY good idea what's up with that.

I've never read Robert Jordan and I don't intend to start (I think it would bore me this is not a moral stance) and I've really never read Rice's erotica. In erotica especially I think you have all the right in the world to get fucking weird about it! But so, when I was young I read the whole Vampire Chronicles series. I don't remember it perfectly, but there's plenty in it to reveal VERY plainly that Anne Rice has issues with God but deeply believes in God, and Anne Rice has a preoccupation with the idea of what should stay dead, and what it means to become. So, when i found out her daughter died at the age of six, before Rice wrote all of this, and she grew up very very Catholic' I said, 'yeah, that fucking checks out'.

Was Rice herself aware of how those things formed her writing? I think at a certain point probably yes. The character of Claudia is in every way too on the nose for her not to have SOME idea unless she was REAL REAL dense about her own inner workings. But, sometimes I know where something I write about comes from, that doesn't mean I'm interested in sharing it with the class. I would never ever fucking say, 'The reasons I seem to write so much of x as y is that z happened to me years ago' ahaha FUCK THAT NOISE. NYET. RIDE ON, COWBOY.

But I've known some people in fandom works who clearly have something going on and don't seem to realize it. Or they're very good at hiding it. Based on the people I'm talking about I would say it's more a lack of self-knowledge, and I don't even mean that unkindly. I have, in many ways, taken myself down to the studs and rebuilt it all, so I unfortunately am very aware of why I do and write the things I do most of the time. It's extremely annoying not to be able to blame something. I imagine it must be very freeing. But it ain't me, babe.

Anyway, a lot of words to say: Maybe! But that might not stop them from writing it, it might be a useful thing for them to engage with, and you can always just not read it.

Also, we don't censor words here.

[kinselu]

im obsessed with these mg1 memes so here's an invader zim version bc i havnt seen one yet

[celestial-sprouts-art]

POV: you are me filtering out ZADR and RAPR on A03 (I want a found family focused fic) and I watch OVER HALF of the fanfics disappear

[starlitvesper]

Eyyy does anyone else feel like you’re too much all the time and always having some kind of crisis and sometimes the things you’re reacting to are just ghosts of traumas past and not actually happening NOW??

… Nah? Just me? 🙃😭

[incorrect-zadr]

Zim: *finds half a watermelon at Whole Foods*

Zim, holding it up for everyone to see: LIES!

[egosketch]

[bonniecupcake]

Prepare for trouble, make it double!

[illusioncanthurtme--art]

She got em 😔

This is very old. But life has been repeatedly kicking me while I'm down, and I want to share something because sharing these stupid drawings and seeing how people react brings me some joy :')

I'll admit I did plan on finishing this at some point, but it's gotten too old to the point where... it's just too old. I don't want to touch it.

Also YES dib is catfishing zim 1000000000000%

[prostoy-brodyaga]

[lethal-spaceship]

zadr bad lol

[v1p0]

Has anyone made this yet

[frosting-surfeit]

one of my favorite interactions

One thing is for zim to talk nonsense only he understands but another is dib actually giving a response as if he not only understood what the fuck zim is even on about but actually, genuinely, felt like answering

I love it when they do that, this absolutely floors me

[ink-mar-qin]

Here are the bois again

[starlitvesper]

Uncensored Irksona shenanigans on my BlueSky account 💙

[water-scum]

Found these mfs in my stash from a year ago