#Non-lifted golf carts

[golfcartusa]

Non-lifted Golf Carts for Sale in the USA

Discover the perfect non-lifted golf carts for Sale in the USA at Lakeside Buggies. Customize and build your own 2023 Epic E60 6-passenger golf cart.

Non-lifted golf carts are typically designed for recreational use, transportation within gated communities, or short-distance travel on golf courses.

For more information visit our site: https://www.lakesidebuggies.com/products/2023-epic-e60-non-lifted-6-passenger-golf-cart-builder

[ask-the-achs]

🔑 Coreen Razorback

Report 'Miss Piggy 2.0'

She is a 6'8" tall anthropomorphic female Australian wild pig. She has a very muscular humanoid torso,arms,digitigrade pig-like legs and a short, thin tail. Her skin is covered with very short, fine dark brown and dark grey hair, with a line of long stiff black hair that goes from the base of her neck to just above her hips. This line is 5 inches tall at the top and half an inch tall at the bottom. It is 2 inches wide, and it is tallest in the middle and shortest at the sides. She has four fingers on each hand, and she has cloven pig-like hooves with four claws on each foot. The last joints on all of her fingers are claw-shaped and they are completely covered by tough keratin. Her thumbs, index fingers and middle fingers are thicker than her pinky fingers. Her head and neck are pig-like, but her snout is shorter than the snout of a non-anthropomorphic wild pig, and her teeth are more like the teeth of an entelodont than the teeth of a wild pig. Her snout is also more like the snout of an entelodont than the snout of a wild pig. She has dark red eyes with round pupils, and she has fairly cow-like ears. The hair on the top and back of her head is 4 inches long. Her tail is 6 inches long, not including the 5 inch long tuft of black fur on the end of her tail. She weighs almost 630 pounds. Her fingertips are blunt.

She is 37 years old. She is rather intelligent and civilized, and she speaks English. She has a very pronounced Australian accent. Coreen is extremely powerful, and she is a champion heavyweight boxer. She is also a champion kickboxer. She is a fast runner, a good swimmer and a decently good climber. She is strong enough to lift a golf cart above her head with little issue. Despite her strength, she is actually very friendly and sociable. She loves being around people, and she also loves taking long walks in nature. She likes knitting in her spare time. Coreen eats most types of meats, fruits and vegetables.

Dr.Sunblood

Threat level:HARMLESS

[hedlunds]

Enamoured - Part I | Too Hot for Golf

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x OFC

Warning(s): Language, brief drug use. 18+ due to explicit unprotected sex

Summary: Haley Davenport and Rafe Cameron had known each other since they were in diapers. With both of their families considered to be Kook royalty, they were constantly around one another, whether it was the weekly dinner parties or social functions at the country club. There was always more to their relationship than friendship but they were both too stubborn to acknowledge it. Until now.

Part Two

(GIF credit to @tairoberts)

Saturday

She honestly couldn’t remember why she agreed to spend her Saturday morning carting Rafe Cameron around the golf course but here she was. With her long, bare legs propped on the dash of the golfcart, Haley smoked the joint pressed to her lips in the most non-conspicuous way possible as she watched the boys play the third hole of the day. “I’m just sayin’. You could make a shit ton of money as a bev cart girl,” said Kelce, waiting for his turn as Topper lined up for his shot. She rolled her eyes before laughing, carefully exhaling the smoke and passing the joint to Rafe, who sat to her right. “Like she needs anymore money?” He commented before taking a hit off the joint. “Is that all I’m good for, Kel? Mindless flirting, eye candy and fetching beers?” She asked, raising her brow in his direction, although it was hard to detect under the dark sunglasses that sat on the bridge of her nose. “Isn’t that what you’re doing for Rafe now?” Topper was quick to answer after taking his shot, heading back to his own cart after his ball landed in the green. She could barely hear Kelce snicker due to her best friend choking on the smoke he tried so desperately to hold in. “You okay there, Cameron?” She peeked over her sunglasses and he quickly nodded. “Not my fault you can’t get cute girls to caddy for you, Top. Maybe Kelce can wear a skimpy little golf skirt for you next time.” She bit her bottom lip, stifling a laugh as Kelce shanked his shot due to his lack of concentration, causing a slew of expletives to fall from his lips.

She drove to the next hole as Rafe cracked open an ice cold beer, taking a long swig. “Thank you for coming,” he said after swallowing. She smiled, glancing in his direction before focusing on the course ahead. “Happy to. Care to share why I’m crashing your boys day?” He laughed, lifting the cap from his head to run a hand through his hair. “I, uh, didn’t want to come. I wanted to spend the day with you but they booked the tee time before I could cancel.” He placed his cap backwards on his head before continuing. “I figured you’d at least make this enjoyable.” She smiled brighter, pulling up to the next hole and parking. “I am honored. Are you enjoying yourself?” He took another sip of beer before getting out and grabbing the appropriate club from his bag on the back of the cart. “You have singlehandedly caused Kelce to fuck up on every hole so far. I’m never golfing without you again.”

To Haley’s surprise, the hours flew by and she was having a blast. After her high wore off, she shared a few alcoholic beverages with the boys in between keeping a tally of their scores and belly laughing at their idiotic antics. After the final hole, they headed back to the clubhouse. “Hate to break it to you, gentleman but Topper was the better man today.” She faked a pout as she looked at Kelce, patting his shoulder tenderly. “You tried your best. Maybe next time.” The sound of their laughter echoed before Topper spoke, looking at his watch. “I gotta go pick up Sarah.” Kelce nodded, hugging the short brunette before following behind the blonde male. “He’s my ride so I’m gonna dip out too. You’re playing next time!” She waved goodbye, turning on her heels to look at her best friend, who was already watching her. “I wanna hit a ball!” He laughed, heading towards the direction of the restaurant as she jogged to keep up with his long stride. “Are you serious?” He looked down at her at his side, watching as she quickly nodded her head. “Yes! I need to practice my swing.” She pretended to swing at an invisible golf ball in front of her, causing the boy to laugh hysterically. “Jesus Christ. You need all the help you can get. Come on,” he grabbed her hand and made a quick left, now walking towards the practice range. He figured they could spend a few minutes working on her swing before grabbing some food and calling it a day.

There was no one around, so he guided her to one of the tees before dropping her hand. “Wait right here,” he said before jogging back to the clubhouse. After a few minutes, he emerged with his golf bag on his shoulder, a bucket of balls and a giant smile on his face. “What’s gotten into you?” She smiled, watching him slide the bag from his shoulder and set the first ball on a tee. “Well, apparently, this area is closed but the Cameron name saved the day.” He flashed his signature smirk, making her roll her eyes. “We’ve got this place to ourselves. You’re welcome.” She couldn’t hold back her laugh, taking the club that he handed to her and walking to the tee. “Show me what you got, Hales.” She nodded, attempting to line up the club to the ball but before she could even swing, he was laughing, running a hand down his face in dramatic fashion. “What?” She asked innocently, trying to hide her embarrassment. “You’re holding it all wrong. May I?” She simply nodded. He walked behind her and carefully took the club from her hands. “Watch how I hold it,” he said as he stepped closer, towering over he small frame as he gripped the club correctly, one hand on top of the other. She focused on his hands, studying the placement as the smell of his cologne quickly invaded her senses. Still holding the club with his left hand, he took his free hand and grabbed her right, placing it where his was before repeating the movement with her left hand. “You wanna hold it tight so when you swing, it doesn’t launch out of your hands but not too tight that your hands get sore.” She nodded, trying to focus as he stepped even closer, nudging her right foot with his. “Spread your legs a little wider.” She did as he said, adjusting her stance accordingly, fighting urge to make an inappropriate comment about his choice of words. Never in a million years did she think she’d hear those words leave his lips, especially not directed to her. “Perfect,” he murmured, his lips directly beside her ear, not realizing that she was now nervously nibbling on her bottom lip. “Now when you swing, keep this arm straight and bend the other.” As he spoke, he placed his hands on top of hers again, guiding her to bring the club backwards. “And make sure that you follow through.” He slowly guided her to move the club forwards, mimicking a full swing. “Have at it,” he stepped backwards, unwrapping his arms from around her so she could try. She released a breath that she didn’t realize she was holding, her head now spinning. She took a moment to collect her thoughts, checking her stance before attempting to swing at the ball. She made contact but sadly, the ball only traveled three feet. She laughed, turning to find Rafe biting his bottom lip, attempting to hide his smile as he shook his head sympathetically. “Can we just go eat? I may need more than one lesson after all.” She stuck out her bottom lip, knowing Rafe couldn’t deny her signature pout and of course, he gave in. However, over dinner, she promised to meet him at Tanneyhill for more lessons. Who knew being athletically challenged could be such a gift?

Sunday

As promised, Haley wasted no time before heading to the Cameron residence to spend another day with her best friend. She followed the directions from his text earlier in the morning and headed to the backyard as soon as she arrived, where she found Rafe with his setup. “Mornin’ coach,” she teased with a sweet smile. “Don’t look yet!” He hollered with a smile, attempting to jump in front of something before she had a chance to see what it was. She froze in place, throwing her hands over her eyes to shield her vision. She heard his laugh as he walked closer, guiding her forward by her shoulders. “Alright. You can open them now.” When she opened her eyes, she found a pink golf bag that held a new set of clubs, wrapped in big white bow. “Rafe!” She gasped, reaching for one of the clubs, which was much lighter and shorter than the one from the day before. “I hope you were serious about wanting to learn. Because now I’m invested,” he laughed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “Are you kidding me? I’m all in.” If he only knew, she thought to herself. He smiled wide as he spoke, “Okay, good. I have this so we can practice here.” He motioned to the large net that was set up behind them. It warmed her heart knowing how excited he was that she wanted to learn his favorite sport, despite her lack of athleticism. He always loved how competitive she was.

“Okay, golf 101.” Rafe took the time to break out each golf club, teaching her the appropriate name and explaining its use before handing her what he called a Putter for today’s ‘lesson.’ “You remember that time we played putt putt in Myrtle Beach?” He asked, effortlessly twirling the club in his hand, waiting for an answer. She nodded, “Mhm. I owned your ass.” He rolled his eyes, deciding to ignore her snide comment. “Putting in golf is the same. You use this when you need to move the ball short distances.” As he explained, he set up a ball and gently tapped it, making it roll towards the net. “Your stance and swing stay the same, regardless of what club you’re using. Like I showed you yesterday.” She nodded wordlessly before he continued. “The only thing that changes is how hard you hit the ball. Come here,” He said, using his pointer finger to motion her over. She didn’t hesitate walking to where he stood but as she turned, getting into the same position as yesterday, she carefully brushed her ass against the crotch of his khaki shorts. Rafe immediately froze, sucking in a harsh breath. It was an accident. There was no way that was intentional, he thought to himself. Little did he know that her heart felt like it was beating out of her chest. She never had a problem with guys. She was always confident and therefore, never had problems being forward but this was different. Rafe was not only her best fiend but the boy she’s loved since the second grade. She bit her bottom lip, attempting to hide her smile at his reaction to her movements. He took a moment before wrapping his arms around her, guiding her hands to the handle of the club. Since her new clubs were much shorter, he had to lean forward even more to reach her hands, causing him to shift even closer than before. “Good girl,” he murmured after observing how she properly gripped the handle. It took every ounce of control she could harness not to back her ass into him in that moment. The sudden change in her breathing didn’t go unnoticed by the tall brunette due to their close proximity. “Stand up straight.” She rolled her shoulders back, following his directions and adjusting her posture. He nodded before tapping the ground. “Your feet are too close. Adjust your stance.” Another perfect opportunity presented itself. With a jolt of confidence, she spread her legs further apart, bending over ever so slightly and rocking her hips against his crotch. He audibly gulped, both of his hands finding purchase on her hips, keeping her pressed against him. “Davenport,” he breathed, voice low and slightly strained. She looked over her shoulder at the handsome boy, flashing a bright smile, which made her signature dimples to appear. “Cameron,” she whispered, easing back for the third time. Rafe didn’t hide the groan that passed his lips as he leaned his head forward, his lips brushing the shell of her ear as he spoke, “Are you trying to kill me?” She bit her bottom lip, faking innocence as she shook her head. “No, I’m trying to get you to touch me.”That’s all it took. Rafe didn’t waste another second before he spun her around, instantly cradling her face in his large hands and crashing his lips to hers. He kissed her as though it was their last day on earth. It was sexy and slow but intense, all at once. She gripped his button-up shirt with both hands, holding on for dear life as she lost herself in his taste as his tongue entered her awaiting mouth. The only reason they parted was for air as they both panted, gazing into each other’s eyes. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” he admitted, his eyes flickering from her eyes to her lips and back again. “You’re all I’ve ever wanted, Cameron,” She said, barely above a whisper. She watched the smile light up his flawless face before he brought her lips to his again. His hands quickly moved from her cheeks to her hair as her hands remained fisted in his shirt. As the kiss got deeper, she started walking backwards, pulling him with her. “Take me upstairs. I’m yours. Make me yours,” she begged, looking up at him with her hazel eyes.

He nodded his head with a smile, grabbing her by the hand and practically bolting inside the house, grateful that no one else was home. He carefully but quickly guided her up the staircase and down the hall before they were finally inside his room. As soon as the door closed, Rafe had her back pressed against it as he attacked her lips. This time it was her that had her hands tangled in his hair, keeping him from pulling away. In one swift moment, he effortlessly lifted her from the ground and placed her on the bed with him perfectly nestled between her long legs. “Hales,” he said against her lips before breaking apart. “We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.” He searched her eyes for any sign of uncertainty. Instead, she smiled as she traced his jawline with her fingertips, staring in pure adoration. “I’ve loved you since seventh grade. I want you,” she whispered, watching as he smiled brighter than she had ever seen. He turned his head, kissing the palm of her hand sweetly before finding her lips again. This time, he thrust his hips forward, grinding against her. “Fuck,” she gasped, feeling his cock against pressed against her clothed core, where she ached for him the most. She desperately reached for his shirt, working to unbutton it from the top to bottom. Once every button was undone, she pushed it down his arms as he attacked her neck with a perfect mix of open mouth kisses, sucks and sinful licks that sent chills down her spine. He threw his shirt in a random direction, attaching his lips to her collarbone as her hands roamed his now bare chest. He grabbed the hem of her tank top and with her help, yanked it from her body, tossing it to join his shirt as well. He sat back for a moment, admiring the flawless sight before him. “You’re so fucking beautiful, baby,” he said with a bright smile, slowly running his hands up her bare calves and to her thighs. He wanted to drink on every inch of her. She felt a blush creep onto her cheeks at his compliment but she didn’t bother hiding it. “Say that again,” she practically begged, pushing herself onto her elbows. “You’re beautiful.” She shook her head, smiling. “No, the other thing.” He couldn’t help the wicked grin that appeared as he placed his lips directly below her navel, kissing her slowly, inching his way to the middle of her breasts. “Baby,” he whispered before licking a single stripe from her breasts to the sweet spot on her neck, directly beneath her ear. She could have finished right then and there as a pornographic moan left her lips.

As he reached behind to unhook her bra in order to remove the fabric from her body, her feeble hands were quickly at work on his shorts. They were in a desperate race to rid the other of clothes so they could be even closer. Once her bra was unhooked, she pulled the fabric from her chest as Rafe pushed his shorts and boxers down in one swift moment. Her shorts were all that remained. She was busy drinking on the sight before her. Rafe was fucking hot when he was fully clothed but now that he was completely naked above her, she could barely focus on anything. He felt her eyes studying every inch of him, making his heart swell. Amongst other things. “Haley, baby,” he said softly, grabbing her attention. “Are you sure this is okay? This is what you want?” He massaged her thighs, waiting for an answer. He was giving her one last out, although she wouldn’t need it. She looked deep into his eyes with a wide smile before biting her bottom lip. “Yes. Absolutely, yes,” she giggled, carefully raking her nails down his stomach. “Please fuck me, Rafe.” He flashed his signature smirk, dipping the tips of his long fingers onto her shorts as he gazed lovingly into her eyes. “I’m going to take such good care of you.” With that, he pulled her shorts and panties down her legs, tossing the fabric on the floor. He tried so hard not to stare but he was so turned on, he couldn’t help himself as she opened her legs, exposing her core to him. He subconsciously licked his lips once he saw how wet she was. “Such a pretty pussy,” he whispered, his eyes flashing to her face as he reached forward, barely running a fingertip through her folds. He watched her eyes fall shut and her head fall backwards as her mouth opened, only for no sound to escape. She felt the bed shift and before she could process anything, Rafe’s mouth was on her and she lost her fucking mind. He started slow, giving gentle kitten licks to her clit but she tasted so good, he quickly began devouring her. “Oh my god,” she gasped, gripping onto the sheets with one hand and fondling her right breast with the other. He wrapped his mouth around her clit, sucking as he pushed his middle finger deep into her cunt. Her walls clenched around him and the sweetest, most sinful sounds left her lips, going straight to his cock. She stopped playing with her nipple and gripped his hair, tugging roughly as he moaned into her, pumping his finger in perfect rhythm. She couldn’t control her hips as she bucked into him but he quickly put a stop to that. With his free arm, he pushed her down to the bed by her stomach, forcing her to stay in place as he added another finger. She sang his name like a mantra in between lustful moans and desperate little whimpers as he fucked her with his mouth and long fingers.

He couldn’t wait any longer. He needed to be inside of her and he knew Haley was just as desperate as he was. He removed his mouth first so he could watch her take his fingers as he stroked his cock with his free hand. He looked up to find her watching as she fondled her hardened nipples. He locked eyes with her, slowly removing his fingers from her core and placing them into his mouth, sucking and licking them clean. “That was a dream come true for me,” he admitted, kissing his way up her body. “You taste like heaven,” He whispered before taking her left nipple into his mouth, tweaking the other with his free hand. She tangled both hands in his hair as he slowly made his way to her lips. Once they were connected, she moaned at the taste of herself on his tongue. He briefly pulled away, supporting his weight in his forearms that were placed at each side of her head, looking into her hazel eyes as he spoke, “I love you.” She gazed at him through hooded eyes, her hands grasping his biceps. “I love you.” Rafe reached down and grabbed his painfully hard cock, stroking his length a few times before rubbing the tip against her slit, collecting the wetness on his head. She bit down on her bottom lip hard, trying not to buck her hips at the feeling. He lined himself up and studied her face as he slowly pushed forward, giving her inch by inch. “Oh shit,” she cried out, her head falling back into the pillow once he was fully sheathed in her welcoming pussy. His eyes never left her face as he slowly started moving his hips. Every time he would pull his hips back, almost pulling out completely, her mouth would open but when he would send his hips forward, shoving his dick back in, her eyebrows would furrow. She was absolutely perfect. He was convinced she was made for him. With his lips attached to her neck, leaving dark marks everywhere he could, he soon developed a rhythm that caused her moans to fill the entire room. “That’s it, baby. Let me hear those pretty sounds,” he encouraged, fucking her even harder but keeping the pace nice and slow. He knew that’s what she preferred because she would clench her walls so tightly around his cock while digging her nails into his arms. His hands roamed every inch of her body as his lips continued their assault against her smooth skin. He didn’t know which was hotter: the sound of skin against skin filling the room, her wet pussy or the dirty sounds falling from her lips. Rafe was convinced he had died and gone to heaven. He was desperate for her lips, kissing her with everything he had as he fucked her into the mattress. He caressed her neck with his dominate hand while the other gripped her hip tight enough to bruise her tanned skin. He hit that forbidden spot deep inside of her that caused her to go absolutely mad. “Right there, right there,” she panted against his lips, making him smirk. He readjusted his hips so he could pound that spot over and over again as she milked his cock, clenching so hard around him. “Right here? You like that, baby?” He watched her nod quickly as she guided his hand to her neck, wrapping his fingers around her. “Fuck yes. I’m so close,” she warned, trying to keep her eyes open as he fucked the living daylights out of her. He tested the waters by tightening his hand ever so slightly around her neck. When he felt her pussy throb, he couldn’t help but smile. “You’re so goddamn perfect. My gorgeous girl. Made just for me.” He leaned down, kissing her as his hips continued. “I’m gonna cum,” she moaned, clawing at his back to keep his body as close to hers as possible. Little did she know that he already knew she was close as her thighs started shaking against his hips. “Let go, baby. I’m right here, I’ve got you.” With his permission, she gave in, the knot in her stomach finally broke loose and her back arched, bliss spreading throughout every inch of her body. Like a perfect gentleman, he fucked her through it, his hips never letting up until her breathing started evening out.

“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” he admitted with a smile, releasing the hold he hand on her neck and kissing her collarbone, giving her time to catch her breath and regain her composure. It took a few minutes for Haley to gather herself but once she did, a bright smile was plastered on her face. “Thank you,” she whispered with a giggle, pulling him up her body to kiss his lips, getting lost in him all over again. “Mmm, you’re very welcome,” he murmured, sliding his hands down her sides and gripping her hips tightly. “Can you turn around for me?” She nodded, biting her lip all over again until he pulled out of her so she could maneuver underneath him. She felt so empty, she hated every minute of it. Once on her hands and knees, she lowered the top half of her body to the mattress, arching her back and keeping her ass in the air. Rafe had to catch his breath at the sight, his hands roughly kneading her ass. “Now this may be the hottest thing I’ve seen,” he whispered, leaning down to kiss her shoulder blades, licking down her spine before lining himself up. He entered her without warning, pushing his cock all the way in before immediately finding a wicked rhythm that had her writhing underneath him already. “Goddamn, you feel so good,” he spoke through gritted teeth, already lost in her. Haley grasped onto the bedsheets as he railed her, fucking her with such intensity that she could almost see stars. He gripped her hips with all his might, neither of them caring about the bruises that would surely be there in the morning. She allowed all of her moans to escape into the pillow beneath her as Rafe fucked her for all her worth. By now, he decided that his favorite sound in the world was a tie between her delicious sounds and the wetness of her pussy. “You take me so good, baby. I’m not going to last much longer,” he warned, which encouraged her to use what little strength she had to push back against him, moving herself on and off his cock on her own. He smirked, his hand moving up her spine, ghosting over her shoulder and neck before tangling in her hair, pulling her upwards. Therefore, her back was flush against his chest. She could feel every muscle of his flex as he thrusted inside of her even harder. He took her breasts in his hands, rubbing her nipples, earning more moans and whimpers to escape from her throat. His right hand disappeared between her legs, gently rubbing figure eights against her clit. She turned her head so she could stare at him with pleading eyes, her jaw slack as she felt that familiar knot building yet again. “Rafe, I can’t,” she warned, her nails digging into his wrist. He used his free hand to caress her neck, turning her head more so he could kiss her swollen lips. “Yes, you can, baby. I told you, I’ve got you.” As he spoke against her lips, he moved his fingers against her clit faster, adding more pressure as he quickly approached his own high. He drank in all of her moans, feeling her legs shake and her pussy clench around his cock, signifying she was on the cusp on another orgasm. She could feel his thrusts become sloppy and before he could ask where she wanted him to cum, she was already volunteering. “Please cum inside me.” With that, Rafe was pushed over the edge, spilling everything he had deep inside of her as her dam broke at the same time. If it had not been for Rafe holding her against his body, she would have collapsed onto the bed after finally coming down from her second high. He fought to catch his breath, leaving sweet kisses against her neck before slowly pulling his cock out of her. He couldn’t stop himself from looking, watching his cum drip out of her pussy, down her thighs and onto the sheets. She was marked in more ways than one. She was finally his.

He carefully lowered her down to the mattress, ensuring that she was comfortable before he disappeared into the bathroom, returning with a warm, damp wash cloth. “Can I?” He asked as she slowly rolled onto her back. This was brand new to her. None of her other partners offered any kind of aftercare so she gladly welcomed it, the thought alone making her heart best faster. She nodded, watching as he carefully cleaned her up before tossing the cloth into the hamper and pulling the covers over her. He wasted no time joining her, pulling her close so she could rest her head on his bare chest, listening to the sound of his heartbeat. “That was unexpected,” he laughed, running a hand through his messy hair. She laughed, rolling over, resting her chin against his chest as she gazed up at him. “Yeah but I’m so happy it did. You’re absolutely perfect.” She placed a chaste kiss to his neck, making a wide smile appear on his already flawless face. “Since second grade, huh?” He asked, brow raised as she blushed, nodding her head. “Yup. Had a crush then but I fell head over heels in seventh grade. Started having inappropriate thoughts about you sophomore year though.” She teased, making both of them erupt into laughter.

[smutty-ki113r]

🌐Discord🌐||

Comfort one-shot reader x creepy pastas (Slenderman, Jeff, Toby, E.J, BEN, Sally, Masky, Hoodie, Jane and L.J.)

Inspired by: The living tombstone

You woke to excessive yelling, turning over and pushing the pillow over your face groaning. The voice got louder and you felt a pair of hands shake you awake, throwing the pillow at them you found that it was Toby. He let out an abrupt gasp and continued to jump around the hotel room. You understood why he was so excited, it was the first day of your trip to Disney world after all.

I know it seems unconventional but you had managed to convince slender to let you guys go. Obviously it was on Halloween weekend, the only time they could go into the parks without being questioned for their looks. That day you would all be going to Epcot.

Masky was probably the most excited about that park even though he had an expressionless face on the ride there. He had been so against going, at least it seemed like it. But you saw him putting ciggarates in a fanny pack when getting ready to leave.

Smiling fondly at the memory you got up and dressed. After breakfast you all drove to the park, seeing the Halloween decorations in orange and black with the shapes of Mickey Mouse. You groaned at the bickering going on in the third row of seats with Jeff and E.J, who was trying to convince Jeff to leave his knife in the car.

“They’ll stop you at security” you called back to him.

“I can hide it” he protested.

“Jeff they have literal metal detectors” E.J rebutted.

“What if I put it in my pants” he said smartly.

“NO” you yelled. After a death glare and a small tug of war between him and E.J he left it. He walked at the back of the group, slumping with his hands in his hoodie pocket. At the entrance the whole crowd was met with “oohs” and compliments about your “costumes”.

There was so much to do, but Hoodie (secretly Masky too) and BEN wanted to go to Spaceship earth. They were all so amazed on how there was a ride inside of the Epcot ball.

“It’s an XXL golf ball” BEN kept saying, convinced that there was nothing inside. There wasn’t much wait but since you were all a big crowd it took a bit to get in. Slender had the hardest time getting in the cart, he had to crouch excessively to fit. You rode with BEN, who was really excited at first because he thought there was going to be a drop but it turned out bore him. He thought it was going too slow, and so he had the bright idea to tamper with the manuals. “Time to spice things up” he said rubbing his hands maliciously. At one point all the carts started spinning, he lifted his hands and “wheeed”. You could hear Sally yelling from the back with Slender holding her in the seat since there was no restraints. At the end he scolded Ben, rushing him out of there as the cast members apologized for the inexplicable inconvenience.

He came out of there with a proud grin, cackling as he pointed out the dumbfounded face E.J made in the picture and the one with Jeff with his tongue out. The smiling killer joined him, watching Toby spin from the dizziness- it was pretty funny though.

Slender admired the late October scenery until Sally pulled him into a stand and graced him with a Mickey Mouse hat. Jeff was yet another unfortunate victim of Sally’s plan, wearing the mickey ears that had a pastel veil. BEN was throwing fits of giggles at this, but you knew Jeff was fucking insecure so you put on ears along with Sally.

The first country you stopped at was Mexico, where you went inside the pyramid. Jeff traded his ears for a big Mexican hat, Ben too. They played with the maracas while Toby, Sally and Hoodie went into the glass shop. It was a recipe for disaster, but you followed regardless. Sally tried on every. Single. Princess crown while Toby looked at the glass pieces a bit too closely. He started ticking while holding one, even though the sign said not to touch them. It flew across the store and collided with a whole other shelf, all of them broke and he started apologizing furiously as Slender messed the employees’ mind to make him forget about the accident.

He had to pull Toby out of the store and drag him to the boat ride, you patted him on the back daringly as he had the guiltiest look. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea for slender to go on the boat ride, he was far too tall and had to bend his knees to look like a grasshopper while Sally smiled and sung along with the cartoon characters. When you got off you could hear Slender mumbling something about his back.

Norway didn’t have much to do but Sally begged to go on the Elsa ride, Hoodie accompanied her happily. Toby as well, but he was really enthusiastic about the songs- he knew all of them. Him and Sally harmonized during the chorus for “let it go”. Since there were a shit ton of little kids there L.J was about to combust. Surprisingly he stayed super silent with occasional grumbles, making mental notes for when he got out of the park. He had to ditch the group to shop for Candy, which he found in China.

Jane was absolutely fascinated with the Zodiac garden there, watching the beautiful plants in the morning sun. Masky tried to relax by watching the show inside the pavillion but Toby caught up to him. He really couldn’t sit still and Masky had to scold him for sitting on the rail he wasn’t supposed to sit on. After, you found E.J playing with Sally with the marionettes and BEN with a cup of Boba. He seemed to be enjoying it- a lot. It was the funniest thing to watch him suck up all the tapioca stuck in the ice, his cheeks got super red and you couldn’t help but let out a laugh.

Jeff was gladly giving Toby his Mickey Mouse ears. In the afternoon you moved to Italy, where L.J was getting complimented for his “stilts”. There wasn’t much to do in Germany or America so you guys went to Japan. Laughing Jack was a lost cause, going straight for the candy while Jeff was mesmerized by the samurai swords. He was looking around to see if he could steal one, but how in the world would he hide that- definitely not in his pants. You caught on quick.

“Just ONE” he pleaded with you as you pulled him away from the glass. “Don’t do this to meeee” he screeched at you like a starved man asking for food.

Trying to throw hands and hit you while you grasped onto his hoodie. You managed to bring him with you as you walked out of the store. Passing by Masky who was trying to get away from Toby- he was fanning masky with those big fans. Jeff sat sourly as you ordered food, a stressed Masky came soon after. He was glad to have some quiet from the ruckus outside, enjoying a meal with you. When he was done he went outside to have a smoke from his fanny pack.

Going back to the store with Jeff on a tight leash AWAY from the swords you found Sally playing with the plushies and L.J taking packs and packs of candy. You stood and stared at him as he loaded up on the strawberry gummies. “What?” He deadpanned as a few fell down from his pile. You just laughed and helped him hold some of them, putting them in your backpack and walking out of the store because- y’all are criminals, and you steal.

It was now late afternoon, and you only had a few countries left to complete the full round of the park. Toby got lost in France, you all spent about twenty minutes looking for him and apparently Slender too who disappeared soon after. Then out of some room came one of them.

“where where you?” Jane asked.

Slender stepped forward “at the show, there were some magnificent castles and I think I’ll have to visit. Maybe even take ideas for house redecoration” he nodded.

Then out of nowhere appeared a cast member holding the hand of one shaking Toby, whose eyes were puffy and cheeks red. “Did you lose this little boy” she asked slender, he shook his head yes and gave a sigh.

The lady was in absolute awe of the group, especially daddy dilf slender. “How IS it that you see through that mask” she mused, taking slender’s head in her hands even though he was super tall. Her mouth was open as she pulled him super close to observe his (non-existent) face. BEN was snickering and you looked back and forth to see slender pretty flustered at the lady’s proximity.

“Leave him alone” Jane smacked BEN behind his head and took him by the ear. You followed them to the U.K. She threw him in one of the phone booths and held the door so he couldn’t escape. You could hear him complain from inside “let me outttt” he said muffled. Jeff caught up and went into the one on the opposite side, playing with the buttons on the dial. When Slender came back he took out a Camera to snap pictures of BEN and Jeff. You stood to the side while he did, obviously both of them didn’t notice. They were pretty candid and when they saw what was happening they ran out of there, only to have their spaces replaced with Sally and E.J, who had to pose with her for the picture.

The sun was starting to set and you guys only had a couple things left to do, one of which Jeff almost exploded in wait for. He wanted to try test track so bad, the line was gruesome and he tapped his foot impatiently in wait. BEN kept tampering with the car parts on display, making doors open and lights flash in boredom. Toby waited outside with Slender because he had anxiety around going too fast in a car and possibly reliving trauma. Jeff, on the other hand, was so excited when it was finally time to go on. He let you sit next to him in the front with BEN in the back. The ride was entertaining sure but the best part was probably Jeff’s face at the end. The car went so fast that Jeff’s cheeks were pushed back with the wind, stretching out his carved smile and flapping as he waved his hands in the air.

Then when it ended he wanted to steal one of the cars from the display.

“I can turn it on and take the safety off” BEN tuned in cheekily.

“Yessss” Jeff said with a fist pump, “which one should we get?” He asked.

“The red one” BEN decided.

“Guys nonononon” you tried complaining but they were dedicated.

“Stop complaining” BEN said, distracting you while Jeff snuck up on you from behind. Covering your mouth with his hand and restraining your arms with another “This is for not letting me take that knife”.

Picking you up and throwing you in the backseat of the car before revving the engine. With tears of joy in your eyes you saw Slender appear in the rear mirror of the car, tendrils waving around in fury. If BEN wasn’t dead yet he would definetly be now, Jeff turned paler than usual. Thank goodness he saw what was going on. They were about to drive off in one of those Toyotas- forget about mass murder, they were about to commit grand theft auto.

Next was the Nemo ride, but BEN was absolutely petrified of being near water so he waited outside with Slender-who very much could not fit in that shell car as much as he tried. Sally really liked it, she went with Toby and you went with Jane. Masky and Hoodie went together. Needless to say all of you enjoyed it very much, and the aquarium after was great too. Jane sat where she could watch the Dolphins and you could hear Toby and Sally’s footsteps running around from tank to tank.

“Do you think Slender will let me take a shark home?” He asked Masky, who told him no. But when they were outside Toby went straight to Slender. “Can I take a pet home?” He pleaded. Slender gave him a strict no but Toby continued to beg, “how about a seahorse?”, “not even a starfish?”. He got shot down but quickly recovered when you guys went to Soarin.

All of them- they loved flying. Even through it was just a ride, it was exhilarating. Passing through the sea and waterfalls, even the castles where Slender would have smiled at (if he had a mouth). Toby yelled like a mother fucker the whole time, luckily Masky was sitting next to you and hoodie- away from earshot. Jeff got the bad end of his shouting, making a face like he was about to murder poor Toby. But the brunette was so distracted by the lights and scenery he didn’t notice. E.J was pretty fascinated too, the height scared him a bit- he was used to being on the ground. Then you all shared some food from the cafeteria and went outside to watch the light show from Canada.

It was such a nice moment, with the sun already set and a hazy glow lingering in the air. You took a deep breath in, the ambiance felt like something unreal. The Epcot ball was illuminated by purplish lights in the background and across the lake you could see all the countries monuments lined with white lights. Slender had Sally on his shoulders so she could take in the view. It made you so happy to be with all of them in an instance like this. You looked back to find L.J eating his candy. With BEN and Hoodie next to you, Masky was leaning on the railing with his elbows next to E.J. and Toby was about to fall asleep. He got pretty startled when the fireworks started, but Sally’s eyes lit up with happiness. She cheered as you watched the group, it was such a kindling time with them. You couldn’t wait for the next day of the trip.

[dailyunsolvedmysteries]

13-Year Mysterious Death Of Cape Fear Police Woman

Bald Head Island lies on the southern tip of North Carolina’s Cape Fear Coast. Only accessible by ferry from nearby Southport, the island boasts a small population of the area’s rich and powerful. Massive beachfront homes line the island where travel is only allowed via golf carts or bicycles. With only several hundred year-round residents, crime is almost non-existent.

Dee Jones, 33, was a nine-month rookie with the Bald Head PD. Her short career had not been pleasant. Upset with her enforcement of the law, locals on the island regularly complained. She was treated badly by the residents as well as her employers. At one point, she filed a sexual harassment complaint against an emergency medical services worker, which further angered the small village.

At the time of her death, Dee had been looking for another job. On the night of October 22, 1999, Dee worked routine patrol. At 11:48 p.m., she advised the dispatcher that she was out with three people near the Bald Head Island light house. These are the last words she spoke over her handheld radio:

"10-4 . . . show me out with three. Stand by, stand by, please."

Then, her voice came across the radio again because she was on an open mic: “There ain’t no reason to have a gun here on Bald Head Island, okay? You want to put down the gun. Come on, do me the favor and put down the gun... ."

A high-pitched squeal was then heard over the radio.

After Dee failed to respond to repeated check-ups, her partner, Officer Keith Cain, left the police station and arrived at Dee’s location just 15 minutes later. Cain found Dee on the ground next to her truck. She'd been shot in the back her the head, and she was dead.

Her .40 caliber Glock duty pistol lay near her right hand. Officer Cain moved the gun closer to the truck and called for back-up. The only back-up available was volunteer fire chief, Kent Brown, and two EMS workers, including the one Jones had filed a sexual harassment complaint against. The men lifted her body onto a gurney and transported it to the ferry dock. The body was left there, uncovered, for all of the public to see as they went on or off the ferry.  The death was immediately determined to be a homicide.

But that was just the beginning.

What did Brunswick District Attorney Rex Gore determine the cause of death to be two weeks later?

A suicide.

To make a horrifically long story short, the crime scene wasn't contained. A bloody palm print on the back of Dee’s truck, drag marks, and blood splatters were not only ignored, but they were hosed away at the fire chief's orders.

A wedding of a prominent Bald Island family was scheduled to start just a few short hours later, and it was determined the newlyweds shouldn't have to look at the mess. So, Police Chief Karen Grasty ordered the scene contained until the state bureau of investigation could arrive, but the chief was reportedly told twice to “go home and shut up.”

Brunswick County Sheriff Ron Hewitt arrived before Grasty and ordered Dee’s body locked inside an office (yes, my stomach continues to churn over that choice). At a later hearing held before the North Carolina Industrial commission, which deemed the death a homicide, the commission stated that “the crime scene had been annihilated, was annihilated. It was destroyed.” After a gag order was lifted years later, Chief Grasty came forward with her own thoughts of the case:

“I was horrified by the way the body was handled, but the way the investigation was handled was equally horrifying. . . . I was shocked -- totally shocked. I raised hell and was sent home.”

Grasty is no longer the police chief. He said the suicide ruling was based on a recommendation by Sheriff Hewitt, who later, in 2007, was indicted and found guilty of federal obstructing charges. He had been under investigation for several crimes, including embezzlement, sexual harassment, and showing up at crime scenes intoxicated.

The list of suspects is lengthy. Allegations of large drug transactions on the island had plagued the community for months. At 6 a.m. the morning after the murder, three men were discovered trying to sneak off the island via the ferry. They were briefly questioned and released. When Chief Grasty attempted to re-interview the men in Charlotte, she was given a stern warning to “just let it lie.” She was further told the men were good Christians and not considered suspects. Doing her own investigation, Grasty found the men had criminal records over 48 pages long. To this day, Grasty firmly believes Dee interrupted a drug transaction and was killed as a result.

Four local, state, and federal independent hearings, which included extensive testimony by experts, ruled the manner of death as homicide. One member of the commission wrote:

“To self-inflict a gunshot wound to the posterior mid-line of her head and accomplish a slight upward projector, she would have had to have aimed the gun at the front of her face with her thumb on the trigger, then raised her arms over her head so that the gun would be in mid-line, and upside down. ... Even in this position, the casing would have been ejected to the left. ... The casing was found to the right.”

Essentially, the commission called the ruling of suicide by District Attorney Gore ridiculous. Even so, these rulings were not enough to sway Gore. He closed the case in November 2001, calling it a suicide, and refused to re-open it. Although he admittedly confided to an investigator that he "has some questions" about the death, he publicly stated, "Only God and Officer Jones know what really happened."

Some say the campaign-contributing residents of Bald Head Island and their fear of property value decline from a murder and drug rumors were the most encouraging factor in the district attorney's decision. 

The intricate details of the murder, the crime scene, and the investigation are equally disturbing.

Since the time that District Attorney Rex Gore made his initial determination, several questions have arisen regarding the cause of death. There are many people, including the family members of Officer Jones, who believe that Officer Jones was murdered. Their primary concerns are whether there was a rush to judgment in this case and whether those responsible for the investigation were thorough in their analysis. After District Attorney Rex Gore closed the criminal investigation, the Buff family filed a civil action for the purposes of determining the cause of death. In 2003, a N.C. Industrial Commission hearing resulted in a finding that Officer Jones’ death was a homicide.

Furthermore, subsequent legal rulings have reinforced this opinion. Despite these findings, District Attorney Rex Gore was unwilling to change his initial determination or rule the cause of death as undetermined. Unfortunately, this action on Mr. Gore’s part lead many to conclude that he was not acting in a fair and impartial manner. Regardless of the truth of this assertion, such a perception is damaging to the Office of the District Attorney.

Anyone with information regarding the death of Davina Buff Jones in encouraged to contact the Brunswick County District Attorney’s Office at 1-910-253-3910.

[tea-and-spoons]

All About Accommodations

It’s the start of a new school year for lots of people, so one of my friends suggested this would be a good time to talk about accommodations!  This system is wildly different in grades kindergarten through 12, so I’m just going to talk about accommodations for college students right now.

Accommodations are supports that help students with disabilities to have equal access and opportunities in college (or any school, or a job!)  Providing “reasonable” accommodations is required by the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), so if you’re a student with a disability in the US, you’re legally entitled to these supports!

By the way, any condition that “substantially limits one or more major life activity” counts as a disability.  So if you have a mental or physical health conditions that creates challenges with taking care of yourself, physical activities (including walking, standing, lifting, and bending), seeing, hearing, eating, sleeping, speaking, breathing, learning, thinking, reading, concentrating, or communicating- you’re protected by the ADA, even if you don’t personally call yourself disabled.

For me, the best way to understand something is to have examples, so I’m going to list a whole bunch of common college student accommodations below.  Many of these will apply to a wide variety of disabilities. If it’s helpful for you, it’s helpful for you, no matter why!

Some common accommodations for college students:

-ASL interpreter

-captioning on videos, live zoom classes, or CART captioning for live in person things

-large print and Braille documents

-audio books and recordings of readings

-extended time on tests

-reduced distraction spaces for test taking

-extensions on assignment deadlines

-permission to wear headphones in class

-permission to take breaks during class

-advanced warning about fire drills

-evacuation plan for when the fire alarm is not a drill

-note taker (someone else takes notes for you in class and sends you a copy after)

-multiple copies of textbooks (to avoid having to carry the book around)

-online versions of books

-permission to use a computer for note taking and/or tests

-access to transportation around campus (often a van or golf cart)

-access to a chair during labs

-having classes recorded

-set up to attend class remotely

-extra excused absences

-modified class schedule

-permission to have a water bottle and/or snacks in class

-reserved seating in a certain area of the classroom

-different meal plan

-speech to text software

-screen reader software

-single dorm room, or room on the first floor, or room with a private bathroom, or room in a  quieter location

-being placed in a dorm that is as close as possible to your classrooms and dining hall, or one that’s wheelchair accessible

-permission to have an air conditioner in your dorm room

This list is by no means exhaustive.  The list of possible college accommodations, both academic and housing related, is probably endless!  So if there’s something you would benefit from that isn’t listed here or on your college website, it’s definitely still worth asking about it.  We don’t fix neatly into boxes, so figuring out accommodations can be a creative process.  Even if it sounds really unusual, if it would help you, go ahead and ask!  

So, how do you get these wonderful accommodations?  I’m pretty sure every college in the US has an office that is dedicated to working with students with disabilities.  It’s probably called something like “Office of Disability Services”, or “Office of Student Accommodations and Access”, or “Resource Center for Students with Disabilities”.  Searching “disability accommodations” on your school’s website will probably get you there.  It’s generally better to get this process started as soon as possible, even before you move in, so things will be ready when you get there.  I think I’m going to write a second post soon about actually working with the office of disability services.  It isn’t always an easy process, but please please please remember- you deserve accommodations.  You deserve an education and to be at college.  You deserve to be safe and supported.  Don’t give up!

But before I finish this post, I want to clear up some myths about accommodations.  First of all- they’re not cheating, or unfair to other students!  What accommodations do is level the playing field so you can participate in college in the same ways your non-disabled classmates can.  Your body and/or brain are different, so you have different needs, and that’s 100% okay.  Also, you don’t need to be totally unable to do the thing without accommodations to receive accommodations.  If it helps you to stay healthier and safer and participate more, then you deserve that accommodation.

Best of luck on the new school year!  Now go forth and advocate for yourself, I believe in you!

Source:  https://www.dol.gov/agencies/ofccp/faqs/americans-with-disabilities-act-amendments#Q8 

[echos-lighthouse]

Erased Memories Chapter 1: Erased

AN: This is the first chapter of Erased Memories

This is an AU about everyone forgetting that Sun Wukong existed. Lot’s of angst and fluff potential

This is VERY long I highly suggest reading it on AO3. In case you can't, (and for master list reasons) I’m also posting it here.

This came out sooner than originally anticipated thanks to anxiety and insomnia. Love you guys

After the light died down, Wukong found himself in the middle of the street. A truck drove by, almost running the Monkey King over. He barely managed to dive out of the way. “Ey! Watch where you’re going!” The driver yelled. Wukong quickly ran to the sidewalk so as to not get hit by a car. After reaching the sidewalk, he took a moment to look around. No rubble, no smoke, no Spider Queen minions. It just seemed like an average day. “How did that happen,” He murmured to himself. Wait. “Did I miss the fireworks!?”

Pedestrians turn to look at him. He may have yelled that part a little too loud. After the people stopped looking at him (which was uncharacteristically quick) he looked a little ways down the street to see a familiar noodle shop. He tried to avoid the pedestrians as he walked by. They all seemed to be more pushy than usual. He walked into the shop, shut the door behind him and leaned against it with a sigh.

“Welcome to Pigsy’s noodles! Home of the world’s longest noodles! What can I get ya?” The man (or rather pig) behind the counter said. Wukong jumped at the suddenness, but when he realized who it was, he  came and sat down at the counter. “Hey Pigsy. What happened to Spider Queen?” Pigsy glanced at the monkey, looking at him like he had three heads. Not that he hasn’t had three heads before, but he was sure he only had one at the moment. “I’m sorry, do I know you?” Pigsy asked. “Uh… yeah? I train your kid? He’s my successor?” Wukong reminded him. Pigsy’s face scrunched up. “Successor? He’s just a noodle boy. Look, I don’t know how you know I have a kid, and I don’t know who this ‘spider queen’ is, but if you’re not gonna order anything I’m gonna have to ask you to leave,” The Pig said, threateningly hitting his rolling pin like a bat. Knowing Pigsy would definitely pick a fight, Wukong thought it would be best to leave. He didn’t want to have to hurt him. Again.

“Wait, before I go, where’s Tang?” he asked, heading for the door again. “Who’s Tang?” Pigsy was still clearly pissed, but there was a slight bit of confusion on his face. “Nevermind,” and with that, Wukong left the restaurant.

“Where would that nerd be?” Wukong asked aloud while walking down the street. He was hoping Tang would know what was happening. He didn’t personally know Tang, but MK had shown him a picture of the guy on his phone, and if his memory served him right, Tang was often found at Pigsy’s Noodles, or at the library. He decided to head there next. Then he  realized he had no idea where the library was.

Looking around the streets, he noticed a familiar kid riding a golf cart, heading back to the restaurant. “Kid? Kid!  MK!” Wukong excitedly shouted to him and ran over. “Uh, hey… sir? Do you need something?” He asked. “Yeah. What happened to Spider Queen?” The young apprentice’s face morphed into one of horror.

“Spider!? WHERE!?” He started looking around himself looking for a non-existent spider. “Kid, there’s no spider on you,” Wukong said. MK let out a sigh of relief, before laughing nervously. “Sorry about that. Can I help you?” He asked innocently. Wukong frowned. “Do you not know who I am?” He asked. MK thought for a moment before shaking his head. “Nope, sorry dude,” MK didn’t know who he was. Wukong’s heart sank a bit before saying, “Uh… Do you happen to know where Tang is?” MK enthusiastically nodded.

“He’s at the library right now. I just got back from delivering noodles to him.” The library. “Where is that?” He asked. “Around the corner? Says ‘LIBRARY’ in big letters, it’s hard to miss dude,” MK said before taking off again. Of course it was obvious. Now MK was going to think he was crazy. Was he? He had to be if no one knows who he is. Or remembers Spider Queen. Right?

The library was familiar in a way. He had never been here personally, but it had a nostalgic feel to it. It kind of reminded Wukong of Tripitaka. Speaking of Tripitaka…

There Tang was, at the front desk, eating noodles and reading a book. “Tang?” Wukong asked cautiously. If Pigsy and MK didn’t remember him, Tang HAD to know who he was. Right? The guy is a huge Sun Wukong geek. There’s no way he would-

“Go see someone else. I’m on lunch.” He said, not even looking up from his book. That was out of character. Wukong needed to talk to him, and to do that he had to get this guy's attention. He just did the first thing he thought of doing. Even if he would regret it later. “Well I’m Sun Wukong. Isn’t it cool to meet your hero in the flesh?” He asked, almost flirtily. Tang looked up from his book to scan Wukong before shoving more noodles in his mouth.

“Is that like an OC or something?” He asked, turning back to his book. Wukong’s jaw dropped. Tang? TANG!? Tang didn’t know who Sun Wukong was!? What was happening? Suddenly, the phone was ringing, but Tang didn’t move to pick it up. “Aren’t you going to get that?” He asked. Tang slurped the last of his noodles, looking in the carton as though it were hiding more noodles. “I’m on lunch.” He said again.

Wukong groaned before asking another worker where the records of “Journey to the West” were. After finding out where they were, he meandered his way over to the books and plucked the first one off the shelf. He opened it up, and the first chapter didn’t even MENTION him.

He thought back to what happened before he realized no one remembered him.

He was fighting the lady bone demon. He jumped to gain force in his punch, but she faded away into a patch of cyan smoke, slowly dissipating. His fist only met air. Then the whisper. “I will erase the memory of you from this world.” It was quite haunting. He didn’t know what to make of it, looking around for the darn demon. Suddenly, a blinding glow encompassed his vision. When his vision cleared up again, the first thing he saw was a perfectly blue sky, and he was standing in the middle of the street.

“Sun Wukong, was it? Were you here all night?” Wukong woke up to Tang gently kicking his side. He groggily sat up, lifting the book up off his lap. It was the first volume of “Journey to The West.” He didn’t even remember falling asleep. He stretched as Tang picked the book up. “Journey to the West? I love this book!” He cheered. “Do you like it too!? I’ve been wanting to discuss it with someone, but no one else reads it or wants to discuss it with me.” Wukong felt a pang of guilt at Tang’s disappointed face.

“Sorry, no. I’ve never read it. I WAS in it though.” He said with a smirk. Tang squinted at Wukong as he stood up. “Are you sure? There weren’t any monkeys in it aside from Six Eared Macaque. Plus if you were in it, you’d have to be immortal or something,” He laughed as though that wasn’t a real option.

“Hey! I was in it! You know! Sun Wukong, the great sage equal to heaven, the monkey king, the leader of Tripitaka’s band TO THE WEST.” He pointed at the book. Tang just laughed again. “Alright, whatever you say,” Wukong was losing him. “How am I supposed to prove to you… Ah! I got it!” He said. He scooped Tang up and started running out of the library. Tang just accepted it. Being kidnapped was a pretty good excuse to miss work, right?

Wukong turned the corner back to Pigsy’s Noodles. He slammed the door open, where MK was talking to Pigsy. “We’re not open. Get out,” Pigsy said angrily. Wukong ignored the shop owner, and threw Tang into a chair, before picking up MK by the shoulders. “MK! Have you seen the staff yet!?” Wukong asked. MK blinked in confusion before stuttering an answer, “Uh… no? What staff?” He was clearly confused. “Come with me.” Wukong said, enthusiastically taking MK out the door.

“Hey get back here with my boy!” Pigsy yelled. Tang snickered. “Wow. Two kidnappings in a day. Gotta be a record of some sort.” Pigsy turned to the new guy sitting at the counter. “Who are you exactly?” He asked. “Tang. Huge fan. Love your noodles. Can I get a free bowl?” He asked with a teasing smile on his face. “No.”

Wukong carefully navigated his way between pedestrians as he took MK to where he had trapped the Demon Bull King. His staff should still be there. Although just to be sure. “Do you know who Demon Bull King is?” He asked as he walked into the surprisingly shallow tunnel. He set MK down as they walked in. “Kind of. Redson talks about him a lot, saying that guy is his father, but that’s all I really know about him. Why?”

Wukong didn’t look down at MK as they continued further in. “Because if you don’t know who he is, then he’s still trapped under the mountain with my staff. That’s a good thing.” He stopped MK as they were about to enter a giant room, surrounded by pipes. This was it. There was a mound of dirt with a tree, and a red and gold staff sticking out of the dirt. But there was also a lot of people surrounding it. “Who are they?” MK asked.

“That’s Princess Iron Fan. I’m assuming you know her son, Redson, and the others just look like robots. But we need to get through them, get that staff, and get it back to Tang so I can prove to him I was in ‘Journey to the West.’” He whispered. MK’s eye’s sparkled. “You’re in ‘Journey to the West’!?” he whisper-shouted. “Yes now look. I’ll hop on the robot bulls there, there, and there. I’ll distract Princess Iron Fan and Redson while you get the staff.” He said. “Wait, I’m sorry, what bull bots?”

Instead of answering MK’s question, Wukong leaped right into action. He  jumped and stealthily landed on one. Then he jumped on the other two, before landing directly in front of the royal family. “Why Hello Princess Iron Fan, Redson, it’s great to see you two again after so many years. It’s been a while. We should catch up. How’s the hubby?” His voice was dripping with sarcasm.

Princess Iron Fan growled. “He’s been trapped UNDERGROUND for a while now, no thanks to… actually I don’t remember who trapped him here,” she seemed surprised, but her demeanor eventually lead to not caring. Wukong was going to go on a rampage. “ME! It was ME! I trapped your HUSBAND under MY STAFF! How do you not REMEMBER THAT!? He shouted. The princess gave him a disgusted look. “Really, I think I would have remembered you,” She said. “Mother, who is this?” Redson asked. Princess Iron fan shrugged, to which Wukong made a condescending face.

“Hey! What is he doing there!?” Redson called, pointing at something behind Wukong. Wukong turned around to see MK with his hands on the staff, trying to pull it out. Shoot. Kid’s been seen. “A little help?” MK strained to get the staff out of the mound. “No can do kid, you need to know you can do this by yourself. Besides, I’m busy,” he said. The bull bots’ eyes began glowing red. “With what!?” MK shouted. Wukong turned to face the crowd of bull bots. “Taking out the trash.”

As MK continued to pull the staff out, Wukong was destroying bots left and right. “I got it!” The kid finally called out. “Great! Let’s get out of here,” Wukong said. He zipped over to MK, summoned a cloud, and they rode it out of the cave. “After them!” Redson called out. As they left the cave, a group of bull bots followed them out with Redson on a hoverbike. “Uuuuh, would you mind picking up the pace, like, now!?” MK screeched.

Wukong suddenly stopped the cloud, as a thought came to mind. “Why did you stop!? I said FASTER! How do you driv-”

“Are there any citizens behind us?” Wukong asked quizzically. “Oh no. Just a junkyard, the ocean, and an ARMY OF BULL BOTS AND A DEMON BOY WHOS GETTING CLOSER BY THE SECOND!” MK yelled. Wukong smiled. “Perfect,” was all he said before turning to face the bull bot army. He summoned a bunch of golden energy, and created a large golden explosion, causing all the bull bots and Redson’s hoverbike to malfunction and start falling.

“Woah! What was that!?” MK asked, his eyes practically shining with joy. “I’ll uh… I’ll tell you in a moment, kid,” Wukong said. We sounded kinda woozy. “Uh, Mr. Monkey, are you okay?”

“Oh yeah, I’m fine, hey, you should call me Monkey Kin-” Wukong was cut off by the cloud beneath them suddenly disappearing. “AH! Mr. Monkey WHAT’S HAPPENING!?” MK yelled as they began to plummet to the ground.

Out of nowhere, there was a flash of green, and MK realized he had stopped falling. “Mei!” He said happily. “Hey MK! Pigsy told me you were kidnapped by some monkey guy so I came to get you,” She said. Her voice was kind of muffled from her helmet and the wind, but it was still easy to make out what she was saying. MK gasped as he realized something.

“Mr. Monkey! We need to go back and get him,”

“Why? Didn’t he kidnap you?” She asked, confused. “Yeah, but he seemed to have a pretty good reason though. Plus, he kind of saved me from an army of bull bots,” He chuckled nervously. “Bull bots?” Mei asked as she turned around. “It’s a long story I’ll explain later,” They saw where Wukong was falling and Mei picked up her speed. But the Monkey was falling fast. “We’re not going to make it,” MK cried. “Not if you keep shaking me we won’t!” They were just about to reach him, but they were too late. He hit the ground so hard it made a small crater in the street below him. “NO!” MK yelled. Mei stopped her bike, and MK jumped off to go see Wukong’s limp body laying in the middle of the crater. “M-Mr. Monkey?”

Wukong suddenly burst into a coughing fit, causing MK to jump. “Oh Mr. Monkey, you're still alive!” He quickly hugged him as Wukong stopped coughing. “Kid. There’s something I need to tell you,”

“Yes Mr. Monkey?” He said. Wukong coughed again. “Show the staff off… to… Tang… bleh.” The monkey fake fainted. “He’s okay,” MK said softly.

--

“Redson! Demon Bull King? Bull bots!? That’s where the weird Monkey-”

“Wukong,”

“Not NOW Tang,” The shop owner grumbled. They had been talking while Wukong had MK out, Tang  offering comforting words (and maybe sneaking a bowl of noodles) and Pigsy freaking out for MK’s safety. But when the kids brought back a passed out monkey and a tale of a golden explosion, they realized Wukong probably didn’t have any ill intent for MK.

“But how is he not dead?” Mei asked, poking the monkey’s cheek. “He’s immortal,” Tang said ominously. “What?” the others asked in unison. “Earlier I found him in the library, claiming to have lived through the events of Journey to the West. The problem with that, is that he would have had to be immortal. Considering the fall didn’t kill him, I say it’s a pretty good chance he is what he says he is,” Tang explained. He reached over the counter for another bowl of noodles, but Pigsy whacked his hand away.

“So he was being honest?” MK said, looking back at the sleeping monkey. “Well, most likely. If what you say is true, and you saw a golden explosion, then it’s quite possible, since the one in the records say Pigsy was the one to that.”

“I don’t remember ever-” Tang looked over at Pigsy. “Uuuh reading that Pigsy had powers like that,” He said. Tang’s face lit up. “You’ve read Journey to the West!?” He asked excitedly. Pigsy couldn’t look at him. “Yeah, something like that,”

After a moment of (awkward) silence, Pigsy spoke up again. “I have a friend who can help with your friend’s condition,” Tang chuckled. “Oh he’s not my friend.”

--

“Pigsy! It’s great to see you! How have you been?” The blue and orange giant asked his friend as he hugged the air out of him. “I’d be better if I could breathe!” Sandy put Pigsy down. “Well what brings you here buddy?” He asked. Pigsy simply pointed to the limp monkey he had dropped when Sandy picked him up (Pigsy was the only one who could carry him). Sandy leaned down to get a closer look at Wukong. “I know my teas are great, but I don’t think it can bring people back to life,” he said.

Pigsy blinked for a moment. “He’s not dead, just in critical condition,” he explained. Sandy looked up at Pigsy, then down at the monkey again. “Hmmm. Well I know just what to do about that!” He picked up Wukong and lead the group into the boat. Sandy led them to a small living room and he started to get the tea prepared. “Why do you have so many cats?” MK asked. “My therapist suggested it. Apparently I was harboring a lot of anger, and cats and tea help with that a lot.”

He served the rest of them tea before helping Wukong gulp some down. After Wukong woke up, he was instantly berated with questions. “So you’re actually in Journey to the west?”

“Did you know Tripitaka?”

“How do you all know who we all are?” “What do you want with MK?”

“Woah, woah guys calm down. Let him tell his story.” Sandy told them. They all turned to look at Wukong. “So uh… Where do we begin?”

He told them about the Journey to the west, and the lady bone demon. He told them about DBK, and spider queen (RIP MK), and waited for their reactions. “So everyone who’s ever known you, has forgotten you?” Tang asked. Wukong just nodded. “That’s rough buddy,” Pigsy said. “Actually, what about Quan Yin?” Sandy said. “Quan Yin?” Wukong felt his heart swell with hope. “Yeah! If it’s a demon’s curse, then a goddess or other celestial being should be resistant to it right?” MK said with a smile. Wukong’s face slowly began to light up. “You’re all right! We need to find Quan Yin!” He said excitedly.

“How do you suppose we do that?” Pigsy asked. Wukong stood up with a grunt, still beat up from the golden explosion and his fall. “We need to go to Flower Fruit Mountain.”

--

Over on flower fruit mountain, a monkey sat in a big cave behind a waterfall. He looked up at the mural again, looking at the familiar face he didn’t have a name for. The mural was strang. Macaque wasn’t sure why he hated it, but everytime he saw it, it enraged him in some way. The monkey at the top. Who was he? Why did he feel like Tripitaka owed him something. He didn’t get it. He wanted answers. He wanted them from the mural.

He looked out the waterfall at the other monkeys playing about the paradise. It was also familiar. Why was this place  so familiar!? Macaque walked back inside staring at the forsaken mural infrustration. He felt like he was missing something. But what?

“I think I can help you, you know,” a demon said in the distance. “I thought I told you I don’t want your help,” Macaque yelled back. “You did. But I could help you get revenge on the people in that mural. Especially Tripitaka,” The demon whispered in his ear. He turned back to the demon. “No. I already told you no. Leave me alone.” The demon sighed. Oh well. I’m sure you’ll be getting your answers soon anyways.”

-----------

So this story came about because I wanted to know what would happen if Lady bone demon made good on her promise to Wukong from Revenge of the Spider Queen.

Pigsy has totally adopted MK change my mind

So Tang never had Sun Wukong in common with MK, so he never came to Pigsy’s Noodles to snag free noodles from him. He’s still a huge fan and buys noodles every day

I love Tang so much

One time Tang fell asleep in the library and stayed there all night. He almost got fired

Sassy Tang we stan

I mean, I’d excuse you from work if you got kidnapped

MK and Mei already knew Redson

Uh, yes, Lady bone demon reversed time a bit

I FORGOT THE SCENE ALL I REMEMBER ARE PIPES IM SORRY

They should've called them bull bots

He exerted too much energy with that golden bomb thing

Lol drama queen Wukong

Love how Tang and Pigsy barely know each other and are already acting like an old married couple

Sandy and I love tea and cats. I love his tropes

Also yes Sandy is basically Mystake don’t @ me

So yeah basically first episode rewrite but if no one knew who Wukong was and he was only a driving force in person

Macaque: ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST

I feel like I should mention Tripitaka has a similar level of respect as the crystal gems did for Rose Quartz, and he's held in extremely high regards to both the heavens and the people, regardless of whether or not they’re avid JTTW fans. This is mostly for angst lol

[rxsie-the-demon]

Brooklyn Baby | JJ Maybank

SERIES MASTERLIST | chapter one | chapter two | chapter three

chapter summary: Kelce confides in Nikki, who learns the details of what happened last summer. Kie devises a plan.

Chapter 4: Dark Paradise

“Hi! I’m Nikki.”

JJ’s jaw dropped. “Uh...” He blinked a couple of times, looking between me and Kiara, before rubbing his eyes and mumbling, “Ah, fuck me. I’m way too high to be doing this.” He went over to the fridge and grabbed a beer.

Kiara was sitting on the floor, head between her knees, trying to catch her breath. “I’m sorry JJ, but your face was everything.” He rolled his eyes and flipped her off.

I giggled, and took a couple steps forward to extend my hand out to Pope. “You must be Pope Heyward. It’s so nice to meet you, I’ve heard such wonderful things!”

JJ snorted and took a chug of his beer. “I’m sure you have.”

We ignored him and he shook my hand. “It’s nice to meet you, too! Kiara’s told us a lot about you.”

“Aww,” I said, turning to look at Kie. I walked over to JJ and looked up at him. Yes, looked up, since he had about a foot on me. “Nice to meet you.” I smiled warmly. Moment of truth.

He studied my face for a minute, before glancing at my hand and then away. “Whatever,” he mumbled. My eyes went wide with surprise. Sheesh.

“Ohh-kay then,” I spun. I did not think he’d be that rude. I walk over to Kiara and then smiled. “Well, what do you guys like to do for fun?” I asked the Pogues.

Pope opened his mouth to respond, but JJ said, “Beat up Kooks and steal their cash for drugs.” I snorted.

Kiara rolled her eyes. “JJ, play nice.”

JJ shrugged and chugged down the rest of his beer can and crushed it. “Just letting Pillow Princess here know how we roll down here in The Cut.”

“Um, excuse me?” I took a step forward. I could see the satisfied look on JJ’s face, like he enjoyed the fact that I was pissed.

Kie grabbed my hand and pulled me back.

“Well, this has been fun, but we should head back to Figure Eight, right, Nikki?” Kiara looked at me with a look that said Please don’t press this

I shrugged. “Alright.” I turned to face the boys. “Peace out, Pogues.”

“Bye, Nikki! It was nice meeting you! Bye, Kie, love you!” Pope waved. JJ ignored me and headed towards his bedroom.

“Love you too!” Kiara shouted back, grabbing the skateboards.

We made our way outside the house and down the dirt road.

“Did he call me a pillow princess?” I asked Kiara once we were a good distance from the house. “What does that even mean?!”

"You don’t wanna know,” Kie chuckled a little. I shot her a confused look.

“Ok, now I do wanna know.”

“Nikki, trust me-” she pulled her hair back into a bun, “-if I tell you, you’re just gonna get pissed.”

I rolled my eyes. “Oh, c’mon I’m not that unhinged- Wait, was it a sex joke?”

Kie laughed. “Took you long enough.”

My nostrils flared, and I spun around. “I marched towards the house, skateboard lifting above my head. “I’m gonna bash his skull in-”

“Nikki. Nikki. NIKKI- No!” Kie ran after me and grabbed my arms. “Look, I know JJ is frustrating at times, but he means well.”

“He means well?! How the f-”

“Ok, ok! Just give him time?! Please? He just doesn’t like...Kooks.” She waved her hand towards me. “And if he sees that he got under your skin that easily, he’s never going to stop picking on you.”

“He doesn’t like Kooks? You’re, like, his best friend!”

“Well, I never really fit in with the other Kooks, and besides, I’ve known them for years.”

I grumbled, “Whatever,” under my breath and turned around, making my wait with Kiara towards the main road.

Stupid fucking JJ Maybank.

*********************************************

“Uh, girl? You good?” Scarlet asked me, waving her fork near my face.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I had my head down on the table, and I sat up and rubbed my temples. Lunch had started a couple minutes ago, but I wasn’t hungry. I was frustrated. A certain annoying blonde boy was still pissing me off. And it wasn’t Topper or Rafe.

“You don’t look fine,” Topper noted.

“Yeah,” Kelce agreed. “You look like you need to take a shit.” Topper coughed up his drink and started laughing-wheezing.

Scarlet gagged. “You boys are disgusting.” She swatted his arm.

“What?!” Kelce defended. Topper and Kelce high-fived, and I smacked Topper upside the head.

“No, I do not need to take a shit. Thanks for the concern. No, it’s just that I met this kid, JJ Maybanks, last week, and he’s annoying as fuck. I’m pissing about that.”

Topper and Kelce groaned. “I fucking hate that dude,” Topper sighed. Kelce agreed.

“Why?” I asked. “And Kelce, I thought you weren’t trying to start stuff with these Pogues.”

“Yeah, well, JJ’s a special case. He’s dangerous.” Kelce shrugged

“How did you even meet him? He never comes onto Figure Eight and he lives on, like, the other side of the island.” Scarlet added, eyebrows scrunched. “Like, the poor side.”

I thought quick. If I told them I was friends with Kiara, they would start to give me shit.

“I was bored. And I just..drove around over there and stopped at some random pier near the swamp.” I lied and took a bite of my pasta, which literally tasted like cardboard. I gagged and took a sip of my water.

I could tell that Scarlet wasn’t convinced, but she dropped it, thankfully. We continued the rest of lunch talking about scuba diving, but I could feel Scarlet giving me strange looks.

When the lunch bell rang, I practically bolted out of there. Confessing to meeting JJ Maybank made me uncomfortable for some reason, and I don’t know why. Was he really a dangerous person or-

“Nikki! Wait up!” I heard a voice call behind me.

I slowed down and spun my head around to see Kelce jogging up to me. I stopped completely turned to face him, and he made his way over to me and smiled. “What’s up, midget?”

“Shut up,” I hissed and continued walking towards my class. “What’s up?”

Kelce shrugged. “Nothing.” He ran his fingers through his hair a couple times, before following up with, “Actually, are you free today after school?”

“Uh...think so, yeah. Why?”

“Uh, I wanted to go...golfing?” Kelce laughed. “Actually, I kinda want to talk to you.”

I felt a wave of panic. Was this about the Pogues? JJ? Kiara? “Sure, what ab- shit, I just walked by my class,” I spun around and hopped into my room. “Text me later, Kelce!”

“I- ok?! See ya!” Kelce laughed nervously and finger-gunned me. I sat down at a desk and pulled out my phone to see a text from Kie.

‘ayo what’re u doing after school?’

‘hanging w kelce, he like, just, asked me. why?’

‘ooh ok, i was wondering if u wanted to come over to work on the project?’

‘sure! i’ll text u when i’m done golfing w kelce’

‘golfing, srsly?’

‘lmaoo’

********************************************************************

“So, what did you want to talk to me about again?” I asked as I sat into the golf cart. Kelce managed to smack the golf ball into the water, but I noticed his hands were shaking a bit. He seemed nervous, and for the life of me I didn’t know why.

“Um, ok...look, I know it’s a bit weird because I haven’t known you for as long as I’ve known Topper and them but, can I trust you with a secret?” Kelce seemed anxious; his hands were wrapped tightly around the steering wheel and his leg was bouncing up and down pretty fast.

I narrowed my eyes. Well, of course I’d keep it, but Kelce is right, I’ve only been here about a month, and judging from how nervous he sounds, it seems like something...personal.

“Well, of course, but you seem nervous...is everything alright?”

“Yeah no-” he parked the golf cart as we got to our spot. I got out of the cart and made my way to my golf clubs. “Sorry, keep going Kelce.” I apologized and allowed him to continue.

“No you’re good! It’s just that...I think I have a crush on one of our friends and I don’t know how to tell them.”

“Wait, really?! Oh my gosh, who’s the lucky girl?” I exclaimed. Kelce didn’t respond; he just kept walking, and he looked even more nervous. The realization dawned on me.

“Them? Not her? We don’t have any non-binary friends...do you like one of the guys?”

Kelce looked away, nervous. I ran up in front of him and put my hands on his shoulder.

“Hey, Kelce, it’s ok. You can talk to me about this, you know? I’m not gonna out you or anything like that.”

He looked up at me for a second, and I could see the tiny reflection of tears starting to form in his eyes. He inhale sharpy before proclaiming, “I think- no, I am, bisexual. And I have feelings for Topper.”

I gave him a smile, and stood up on my toes to hug him. “Thank you for telling and trusting me with this.”

He hugged me back, and squeezed me tightly. He let go of me and sighed, “It feels good, being able to tell people this. My parents would be accepting, but a lot of our family friends are homophobic and I’m afraid this would ruin our reputation. And-” He stopped 

“I get it. I mean- I don’t get it, but I understand what you’re trying to say. Of course, I’ll keep this a secret, but...are you ever going to tell Topper? Or your parents?”

“Maybe,” he shrugged. “For now, I’m just gonna see if I get any vibes from Topper.”

I laughed. “Maybe. He hasn’t had much luck with girls; maybe a guy is what he needs.”

**********************************************************************

“So, how was golfing with Kelce?” Kie laying bellydown on the floor, doodling away in her sketchbook while I was (attempting to) french braid her hair.

“Uh, it was alright. Kelce kept hitting the balls into the water. For someone who’s lived here for a while, he sucks at golfing!” I joked. She snorted and threw her head back. “Hey! You’re gonna mess up the braid!”

“Sorry, sorry. It’s just funny to me how all take pride in their golfing skills but in reality, they’re not that great.”

“Honestly, I think that’s just all boys. They hype themselves up too much and we’re let down.” I giggled. Kie turned around with a sarcastically shocked look on her face. “NIKKI! Girl, I did not expect that from you.”

I gently smacked her arm, then looped the scrunchie I had in my hand around her hair. “All done. Do you think we should work on our Royal Merchant project?” I got up to grab the small backpack I brought with me. In it was the small notebook I used to jot down stuff about the ship. I had decided not to use my history notebook because this ship apparently has some important history in the Banks, and I’m most likely going to find out stuff about it while going around the island with Kie.

“Uhh, yeah sure hold up.” She stood up and went over to her desk. She pulled out a black spiral notebook that look like it’d had been dragged through the mud and dryed in a river. The cover had patchy brown stains on it and dried up water marks. She spun around and faced me, placing the book down on the desk behind her and putting her hands in the pockets of her gray sweatpants. “After John B and Sarah...we decided to write down everything we knew about the Merchant in this notebook and get rid of everything else. Not that there was much left...our maps, everything got stolen by Ward Cameron.”

“Ward Cameron? Wait...Rafe’s dad? Wheezy and Sarah’s dad, Ward Cameron? What do you mean?”

Kiara stopped. “Um...” and started fidgeting with the hem of her t-shirt, purposefully avoiding eye contact with me. “It’s- it’s a long story.”

“Is it one you’re allowed to tell me?” I was uncomfortable now- well, more like nervous. I fell very antsy, and my hands were shaking a bit. I clasped them in front of me and swallowed to ease my nerves. Something about how nervous Kie seemed made me scared...

“Well,” she started. She looked up at her ceiling and closed her eyes, then exhaled slowly. “There’s nothing legally stopping me, but JJ and probably Pope would be a bit unhappy if I told you.”

I shrugged and turned to crouch down to my bag, slightly disappointed if I was being honest. “That’s alright, you don’t have to tell-”

“Let’s go to the Chauteau.” Kie interrupted. I looked up at her. She had her lips pressed together in a weird smile. I did not know what she was thinking. “I have a plan.” She furrowed her eyebrows together, “Kind of. It’s half a plan.”

I put my notebook in my bag and grabbed the top handle. “You don’t have to tell me, you know. I don’t want your friends getting pissed at me.”

“Oh I know,” she smiled, “but I have a plan. A way to bring the Cameron family down and to bring justice to John B and Sarah. But to do that, the two of us and the boys need to work together.”

I nodded slowly, having no idea where she was going with this. “We are still gonna get the project done, right?”

Kie giggled. “Yes, of course.”

*********************************************

“Yeah, so, that’s...it, basically.” Kiara said, slapping her hands down onto her thighs and turning her head left to face me.

I think the look on my face was one of complete horror, because JJ, who was on Kie’s right, burst into laughter. Full on, tear-jerking, belly-grabbing laughter. Pope, who was standing up in front of him, kicked him in the shin. “Dude, what the fuck are you laughing about?”

After he managed to calm himself down, he wiped his tears and said, “Sorry, man, it was just so funny seeing the Kook’s reaction- I mean-”

“Stop calling me that,” I interjected. “I’m just...mortified you guys went through that, and that...” I stopped talking, and looked down at my hands. That Rafe killed someone. I clenched my fists together. I wasn’t mad, not yet. It hadn’t really set in yet. Right now I’m completely shocked, at Rafe, Topper, even Kelce who kept John B locked up in his house.

JJ must have knew what I was thinking, because the usually cocky look in his eyes faded and was replaced with slight sympathy. ”None of us expected you to know this.”

Tears started swelling up in my eyes. “My god...your friends are dead because of Rafe.” I covered my hand with my mouth. I felt like I was gonna be sick. “I’m sorry, I feel so dramatic; your friends are dead and I’m the one who’s crying.”

Pope laughed dryly and said, “Trust me, we cried enough.” When I looked up at him, he was looking down, and I could see tears forming in his eyes too.

I inhaled once, deeply, then turned to Kiara and smiled. “So, what’s this plan you were talking about?”

***********************************************

A/N

i am sorry for straight-up disappearing. it was a mix of writer’s block and mental health; i needed to plan out some details for the story but when i sorted everything out, my brain was like “nah” but yep i’m back haha

******************************

chapter 5

[cyborgraptor]

haunted house thrill ride minus the haunted house

Last night my brother, his wife, and me both left rather late to see if we could make it last minute to a haunted house an hour away from where we live to Ft. Worth, TX. People might already know the attraction called Cutting Edge, as its been going on for years now - the last time we went to it was 12 years ago. We wanted to see how it was now, and it has a somewhat decent rating. We remember there was bubbles at the end that COMPLETELY soak your clothes and nearly smothers you, so we checked reviews to see if they still had it. It does, but there’s a bubble-less route so you can avoid it. But, the end of this review had us curious.

(Parking was 15-20$ we read on the website, too.) Anyway, we drive down there. Immediately get sad spotting the homeless population taking up entire large sidewalks as we enter downtown. Arrive at 12:15, and the attraction ends at 1am. We knew there’d be a line since it was a semi-chill night thats good for big crowds. Buuuuuuut we weren’t expecting to see around 500 people ass-to-ass wrapped in a tight line in the parking lot 45 minutes till closing. So we said “Fuck that shit, lets find a cool late night dinner place while we’re in down here”.  Regret. My brother remembered there was some ice cream place they went to while they were here some time ago down some main street. Quickly figured out that street was closed off, like some parade/party just recently happened, but there was nothing but a bar open down the street and a security golf cart picking up cones. We figured we could get on our feet and walk further down the street to see if we could find it that way, as there was a lot of hidden buildings. So we park the car, get out, and go to a street corner to look around. Across the street, we saw a woman face-down against a curb to a shop, totally looking like a dead body. Two men were slowly trying to help her up to get in their car. The three of us looked at each other like “Uh oh” and looked back behind us down the street if there was possibly more fucked up people like her, of if someone else was noticing us watch that. Then we heard a scream, and the woman was sprinting full speed out of the parking lot. She stopped suddenly and the men ran over to her, and then she started laughing loudly instead. Okay. Hopefully...............she was just on drugs............????? And then the two men had to lift her like a couch back into the car. We stared at each other again and said “Okay time to go!” and then nearly stepped in vomit on the sidewalk as we turned back to our car. But it doesn’t end there!!!!!!!!!!! We were still starving, so we googled some late-night diners nearby instead. It was either ramen or this place called Ol’ South Pancake house (you can google it if you want). The website makes the place look cute and homey. Our decision to go there was solely placed to get chips and salsa based on what my sister-in-law read on the website, but I think she read the wrong thing. We get there. Pretty crowded. The air inside smelled like cigarette smoke even though it was a non-smoking store. There was a group of eight people in front of us COVERED in fake blood, probably(hopefully) from the Cutting Edge place. A very..........interesting looking waitress hobbles over to us after them to seat us at a table that would make claustrophobic people explode. Then we get......her. The other waitress. She seemed like a sweet elderly woman, at first. Not white hair, but grey, and pretty in-fit for her age. We asked about the salsa, and she squinted at us and said they only had potato chips (which is probably true). We looked at each other and ordered some fried pickles instead. She then nodded slowly and said “Surrreee thiiiinnnnng,” and then gave my brother a face similar to this.

So we’re probably going to get food poisoning. The pickles were good, at least. While we were eating, a group of college-age people sit next to us. One guy was in normal clothing, while his two other friends were in costumes (another guy and a woman). Chucky, the killer doll man, was next to me. The two of them were veeeeerry obviously on something. My first interaction with Chucky was when I was drinking coffee, a red wig suddenly landed in front of me. “O---OOOPSSSSS!” Chucky said next to me, grabbing the wig and dropping it several more times. Our trio just laughed awkwardly. He then tossed it behind me in my chair, and thats when his stable friend said “Hey bro what the hell are you doing, man?” Which, I think, prevented Chucky from groping my ass, and he quickly grabbed his wig back. Then he and his costume GF (assuming) got up to go to the bathroom. They cut through the open kitchen and we could see the staff get startled. While that happened, an old man walked into the section of the diner that was blocked off. We were confused as hell, but another waitress started serving him food in there. Maybe they knew him or something, who knows. But. Do you know where that cut-off door looks out to for the old man to watch?

Haha, it’s to us! Making direct eye contact to me at all times!!!! Oh boy!!!

So now we have a guy with possible dementia over there, and Chucky and his GF come back (through the kitchen, AGAIN) on our right. A staff member comes to their table saying they need to not go through the kitchen ever again. The sober friend is obviously dumbfounded but does nothing but giggle and shake his head. THEN the GF gets up and leans to our table, saying “What are you guys doing tonight?” completely in our personal spaces. Sister-in-law leans back to her to quietly say “What are you guys on?”. The woman kind of shakes her head and replies “Oh just weed. Just a bit of weed.” Smiling HUGE while saying so, but also in a bitchy way. Chucky encounter #2 happens. While his GF was leaning to and fro, he hissed right into my ear, actually making me jump (but not scream). We all laugh awkwardly again. At this point, its better to deal with them than start a huge commotion and possibly make them rage, because the people around us are already keeping an eye on them for all of the shit they’ve stirred already. #3. Shortly after he says “I’m Chucky, the killlleeeeerrrrrr....” and starts pretending to bite the air next to me. That quickly turned to him trying to bite my shoulder. I barely felt anything, and tried to keep inner peace until his friend yelled at him again to stop. There was no teeth-sinking, but I felt a wet mark after he stopped. My brother said he looked like this.

Well. We finally got our food. I got steak and eggs, my brother got a burger, and sister-in-law got a pancake thing with peaches in it. Right after the teeth waitress placed the pancake thing down, she suddenly said, “Wait, there’s no butter on this! You gotta have some butter on it to make it good!” What does she do to solve this, you ask? Simple!

She takes our silverware, takes a plastic cup container of butter from our condiment rack, and starts going to town stabbing and smearing the butter into the once-nice looking pancake thing! For a full 30 seconds in silence! “There you go!” she says with her full rack of fake teeth, and walks away. My brother had to laugh behind his napkin while she was doing it, and so did I. #4. A pancake suddenly lands on my plate after I got done eating the obviously once-frozen steak. Chucky said nothing this time, but his sober friend just shook his head. But after Chucky tossed his last two pancakes on our table, sober friend tried to stop him - in doing so, sober friend accidentally pushed his own plastic cup of cheese on the floor. “Awwww man, look at what you made me do bro!” He sighed seriously. Sober friend then asked teeth waitress where his bacon bits where at, and all she did was look over at their own condiment rack and pointed, “Right there,” and walked away. Sober friend didn’t only spill his cheese, but he spilled his bacon bits onto the rack, too. Costume friends got up to walk outside after that, and we sympathized with him saying “Damn, she’s brutal.” Oh, and by the way, dementia man has still been staring at us the whole time. We’re completely done eating now, and whisper to each other “We need to get the absolute fuck out of here.” We pay at the entrance/exit, and walk outside. What we see is what we believe Chucky and his GF fucking in their car parked to the side of the store. The windows were steamy and only saw his head sticking up. “Time to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I chanted again, as we got back in our car. Dementia man walked out of the diner after us, but luckily, he didn’t see what car we got into. It still doesn’t end there. We cut through the empty streets back to where we got into the city. It was 3:40 am at this point. My brother saw a cowboy sitting at an empty light corner. GOTTA LEAVE! Five minutes later we enter the expressway. Three minutes go by. My brother is cranking up the music to stay awake for the hour long drive back home. But then I see it. Something bright down on the highway below us to our left. We’re passing by and my brother doesn’t notice. “F...........fire. FIRE. THERE’S A FIRE.” “WHAT?”

He stops on the completely vacant road and we back up a little to see it. Yup. Thats a fucking burning car.

We camped there for about 10 minutes until even one cop showed up, then finally a firetruck. Normal people pulled over initially to direct traffic with the flashlight on their phones. All four of the tires popped loudly as they burned. And while the hose was dousing out the flames, a semi-explosion happened. Sounded like a firework, and was very bright, but nothing shattered and debris didn’t rain down anywhere. We finally decided enough was enough and we got the fuck out after the flames got controlled.  I’m happy to say we made it home safe without any other bullshit occurring to us. But What. A. Fucking. Night.

[usfwspacific]

Hatchery Volunteers are Hosts with the Most!

By Julia Pinnix, Visitor Services Manager, Leavenworth Fisheries Complex

Photo: Visitor services manager Julia Pinnix (front row, center) stands with the invaluable group of volunteer hosts at the Leavenworth Fisheries Complex. 

I’ve spent over thirty years welcoming visitors to their public land. One of the most important things to me is making sure there are friendly folks ready to help when people arrive. With a staff of two to cover visitor services at three hatcheries and a conservation office, and an estimated 150,000 visitors, that’s just not possible. So we recruit hatchery hosts to help, providing an RV pad in exchange.

Volunteers are some of my favorite people. They are the backbone of communities. According to the Corporation for National and Community Service, 30% of Americans volunteer, and nearly 80% of them donate to charity; volunteers donate twice as often as non-volunteers. 40% of parents volunteer. 20% of volunteers support education or youth service. And they are often some of the friendliest people around. Our hosts sure are! Doug and Jody Moshier came to Leavenworth National Fish Hatchery in 2018 as hosts, and returned again this year. Both are retired teachers from Ohio. They are at ease with large groups of visiting students, and equally comfortable chatting with adults.

Photo: Volunteer hatchery host Doug gives visitors to the facility a lift. 

Doug told a story from this fall about a couple who came over from Spokane, arriving after regular visiting hours. The woman was suffering from the effects of illness, and was unable to speak or move easily. Doug assisted the couple into a golf cart and took them around the site. “You could tell they were both once active people,” he said. “She was really happy to be able to see something new.” He spent more than an hour with them, and had a lengthy conversation with the husband. Before they left, the man said how grateful he was for the chance to talk. “He’s a full-time caretaker,” Doug said. “He doesn’t get out much anymore. I’m glad I could spend that time with them.” 

Their warm welcome to visitors has been reciprocated by our staff and the community of Leavenworth, something both Doug and Jody have noted.Steve Crowe and Joan Ritten were this year’s hosts at Entiat National Fish Hatchery. “I showed a couple around and walked them through the whole process,” Steve told me. “They asked, ‘Are you a biologist?’ We get that a lot.” He added, “The complexity of what they do here… the temperature of the water, the amount of feed, they collect data for everything so they can tweak what they do. I had no idea it was so complex.” Steve and Joan have volunteered at a number of different places across the country, and will be heading in 2020 for North Carolina’s Cradle of Forestry. Joan told me, “Entiat Hatchery has been my favorite place. 

But it’s not for someone who just wants a place to camp. You have to love learning. There’s so much to learn.”At Winthrop National Fish Hatchery, Frank and Maria House spent the summer providing tours and helping with fish production. This was their first summer at Winthrop. Like the hosts at Leavenworth and Entiat, they enjoy working with people and learning new things. All three sets of hosts, plus Leavenworth’s spring hosts, Heather and Josh Enevoldsen, got together in June for a group training, visiting Chief Joseph Hatchery and learning from staff at Winthrop NFH. It’s the one time of the year everyone can come together and compare notes. The Kiwanis Club of Winthrop generously provided housing for the hosts from Entiat and Leavenworth during their visit.Our hosts often arrive in May and stay until September or October. It’s a long season; but with so much to learn, it’s never dull. On days off, they explore Washington. Joan said, “We’ve put 10,000 miles on the jeep since we got here!” 

After all the time our hosts spend at our sites, it’s hard to say goodbye. As I walk through the front doors of Leavenworth NFH every morning, I see the handsome new bench Doug and Jody designed and built for us to share with visitors. They gave us the plans, too, in case other volunteers want to make more benches for us. It is fitting that their parting gift be one that encourages stopping to take time for conversations, and creates a volunteer opportunity. It’s a reminder that all the work we do for wildlife is done for people, too.

*Note: This piece originally appeared in the Wenatchee World as part of the Fish Tales series.

#LeavenworthLegacy

#VolunteerWeek

#VolunteerAppreciateWeek

[shastelly]

Summer - March Klance Prompts from MonthlyKlance - Day 24

Day 24 of March in May...yep...I will not give up!

Also this is some serious fluffy nonsense just so you know before you start :).  The paladins need a vacation :)

Day 24 – Summer

 "Where did they even find those jackets?"  Keith asked bewildered.

 "At the space mall."  Shiro answered in a similar state of disbelief.

 "I fear we may have pushed them too hard."  Allura stuttered.

 "It does seem some downtime might be in order."  Coran nodded flinching as Lance pulled out a blonde wig and put it on for the next "scene" in the musical the youngest paladins had decided to put on for their amusement.

 "Lance isn't good as a blonde."  Keith commented.  "The poodle skirt fine, but the wig is just off."

 "I'm not sure whatever it is that Pidge is wearing is much better.  How many socks did they stuff in her shirt?" Shiro blinked.

 "More than Lance's."  Keith answered.  

 "You'd think Hunk would have taken off the headband, it doesn't match his jacket at all."  Allura puzzled.

 "I'm having trouble keeping track of which part they are playing at which time."  Shiro admitted.

 "I'm pretty sure Pidge is Rizzo.  Lance is Sandy and Kenickie.  Hunk is Danny and Frenchie and maybe Marty.  I'm really unclear on the other parts.  I think they keep forgetting to change clothes."  Keith muttered, earning a surprised look from Shiro who didn't think he'd ever seen Grease before.

 ***

 "Lance, does dance rather well though."  Coran pointed out as he was switching wigs between playing Sandy and Cha Cha.

 The others hummed in agreement, trapped watching the youngest three sing and dance their hearts out.  To be honest for an impromptu musical with no instruments, sets, scripts from memory and a cast of three they were really doing a pretty good job.

 ***

 "Are those real cars?  Pidge!" Shiro hollered over the revving engines, before Hunk and Pidge flew off down the hall in their race.

 Keith laughed.

 ***

 "Is the message of this show that you should change yourself to match your friends?!"  Allura asked outraged.

 Shiro and Keith were not capable of responding given Lance's appearance in the black leather outfit.

 ***

 Coran had happily joined the end song and the four of them were giggling and singing about always being together.

 Shiro, Allura, and Keith sat watching them dance away, clapping mechanically.  

 "So, vacation?"  Shiro asked still staring straight ahead.

 "Vacation."  Allura agreed.

 "Leather."  Keith muttered watching Lance dance away.

 ***

 And so, a week later…

 "I have an announcement."  Allura stood at the head of the table after dinner.  "As it turns out we have no scheduled missions for the next three days and we are near a resort planet that I used to visit as a child called Sabra."

 "What?"  Hunk blinked.

 "I have arranged for us, barring any emergency of course, to have rooms at the very same resort I used to visit.  And no worries, Coran went and made the reservations himself to assure that it is still as nice as it was ten thousand years ago."  Allura smiled at them.

 "Actually, it's nicer.  Apparently, it was rebuilt recently and is the best of the hotels on the shore." Coran assured.

 "Shore?"  Lance asked in awe.

 "Yes, the resort sits on one of the planets many oceans.  Each has a different color.  This one is lavender and was always my favorite.  The entire planet survives on revenue from visiting tourists.  It is considered a non-conflict zone; no weapons are allowed on the planet.  Oh Coran, is the carnival still on the beach?"  Allura asked a childlike gleam in her eyes.

 "Yes, indeed Princess, bigger and better than ever."

 "A beach?  Ocean? Carnival?"  Lance's eyes blinked open and closed like a doll.

 "I think you broke Lance," Pidge snarked.

 "I am soooooo excited!"  Hunk grabbed Lance's arm which seemed to snap him out of his shock.  He in turn grabbed Hunk and they were soon screaming and jumping up and down.

 "Oh, I need swim trunks?  Coran?" Lance stopped jumping and turned dramatically to Coran.

 "No worries, there is an entire section of resort wear in the castle storage, you may come and choose what you like."  He answered with a dramatic twirl of his moustache.  "I will, of course, be able to provide guidance on what is really fashionable."

 Lance jumped up and he and Coran were off and ranting about packing for the trip for everyone.  

 "Don't worry guys, I'll keep an eye on them."  Hunk offered with a wave and headed after them.

 As it turns out someone should have had an eye on Allura as well.

 "Exactly what is in here?"  Shiro asked exasperated as he lifted the universe's heaviest suitcase/trunk into the shuttle they were using.

 "Industrial size hair dryer."  Pidge muttered trying to cram another of the princess’s cases into the back.

 "A princess needs to be prepared for all circumstances."  Allura answered primly batting her eyes before laughing and helping pack another huge trunk into the shuttle.

 "Is there a weight restriction?"  Hunk asked in awe.

 "This is fine."  Coran nodded. "You should have seen her mother pack for vacation."  Coran shook his head then.  "We had to take three shuttles to fit the family and their luggage."

 "Sounds fair."  Lance smiled at Allura.  His own trunk was much smaller, but still twice as large as any of the others. Lance had on a huge pair of blue sunglasses, a white button-down shirt and blue and red shorts that hit near his knee. He'd managed to find some kind of Altean sandals that were brown and wrapped around his feet and ankles.

 "Shut up, tourist."  Pidge snarked.  She was wearing a green t-shirt and long khaki shorts and the Altean equivalent of flip flops.

 "Be nice you two."  Hunk's own bright yellow tank, white shorts, and flip flops made them the post card for beach travelers.

 "Are we ready?"  Coran laughed, his own blue and orange striped attire looked like a bathing suit from the 1800's or something.   He even had a blue hat to go with it.

 "Shotgun!"  Lance yelled.

 ***

 Two varga later…

 They had parked the castle in an asteroid belt, hidden from sensors and well protected. The planet had assured them it would be safe to orbit, but they were unwilling to leave it unmanned like that and they had all deserved the vacation.  However, the three varga shuttle ride was turning out to be a little much for them all in a single shuttle, crammed into two rows of seats due to someone's excessive packing.

 "I called shotgun.  It isn't fair."  Lance complained for the fifth time from the backseat where he was shoved between Keith and Hunk.  Pidge was sitting on Hunk's lap her legs stretched over the top of them.

 "Sorry, Lance, the grown-ups got the front seat."  Allura echoed back, not sounding the least bit sorry.

 "Like you are so much older!"  Lance huffed.

 "At least 10,000 years."  Allura quipped.

 "That does not count.  Keith, quit touching me!"  Lance elbowed his neighbor.

 "Exactly how am I supposed to do that.  We are packed right against each other."  Keith growled elbowing back.

 "Would you quit!  I'm already dying back here.  Shiro, are you sure you can't turn up the air?  I have a Pidge blanket."  Hunk whined.

 "It's all the way up, Hunk, and we are freezing up here.  Coran matches his hat."  Shiro sighed.

 Coran did look an interesting shade of blue just then.

 Pidge shifted in her sleep tickling Lance's legs with her shorts.  He laughed loudly and jerked at the sensation, elbowing both Keith and Hunk in the process.  The other two boys snarled.  Hunk shoved Lance so hard he ran into Keith again.  Keith jabbed a sharp elbow into Lance's stomach making him pitch forward and sliding Pidge's legs into the back of the seat in front of them.

 "STOP KICKING THE SEAT!"  Shiro was close to losing his shit.

 "Ow."  Lance breathed giving dirty looks to both Hunk and Keith.

 Pidge snored and rolled back over onto all of them.

 Lance scooted back and spread his elbows and legs as wide as he could pushing against the other boys.

 "Enough with the man spread, Lance."  Hunk griped shoving his leg over and leaning on him.

 "I'm squished.  You guys keep pushing me around."  Lance growled.

 "Then stay in the middle."  Keith stomped on his foot.

 "OOW!"  Lance yelled and drove an elbow at Keith's middle, which he blocked and pinched Lance's arm.  "OWW! QUIT!  You guys are being jerks!"

 "IF YOU DON'T QUIT FIGHTING BACK THERE I SWEAR I WILL PULL THIS DAMN THING OVER!" Shiro yelled from the front seat.

 Keith, Hunk, and Lance all shared a look before they burst out laughing at him. Shiro groaned.  

 Pidge sat up and yawned, "Are we there yet?"

 ***

 The resort and beach were everything that Allura had promised.  The resort hotel stood fifty stories high, reflective glass windows covered the building.  The pale purple water of the ocean washed onto the shore in waves that had Lance and Hunk yelling about surfing.  The white sands of the beach were pristine and stretched as far as they could see. When they landed the pod several different types of aliens all dressed in the same crisp white uniforms rushed out and began moving their luggage.  Allura said that they had condos reserved along the beach.  They were given three small vehicles that looked like hovering golf carts.  They received a map of the resort with locations and times for activities and a reminder that there was a feast planned in their honor for that evening.

 Shiro loaded into one cart with Allura and Pidge.  Coran tried to take the wheel on the next, but Keith beat him, which prompted Lance to take the third wheel with Hunk at his side and challenge Keith to a race. Unfortunately, or fortunately as it may be, the carts were very slow, and the race was a pathetic tie.

 Allura and Pidge took the first condo, Shiro and Keith the second.  That left Hunk, Coran and Lance in the third.

 Lance walked in enjoying the beach themed decorations, of course it was all in purples and not blues, which he would have preferred, but they were soft colors with bright white accents and wave designs over everything, even some oddly square shells. He noticed two beds and a couch in the main area.

 "I call the couch."  He announced making it sound like a preference, and not a preemptive move to avoid being stuck with it, as the youngest in a family of five this was not an unusual arrangement for him.  Hunk gave him a grateful smile aware of what he was doing.

 "Oh, good choice."  Coran crowed. He pressed a button and the couch cushion lifted to float about five feet from the ground and fluffed out to look like a cloud bed.  "These are supposed to be wonderful to sleep on, though, I'll admit I don't relish the idea of floating in my sleep."

 "It's great."  A huge grin split Lance's face and he rushed over to the other condo to tell Keith and Shiro about it.

  ***

 At the banquet that evening, there was a huge bonfire and lots of food, dancing and music. Hunk said it was like a Luau. Lance said it was like a family beach party.  The others just thought it was fun.  There was some sort of beverage in a red coconut looking thing that Shiro objected to at first, but after a brief discussion with Allura he allowed.  

 Lance took a sip and smiled, "It tastes like a Pina Colada!"

 "Why do you know what that tastes like?"  Keith frowned.

 "My sister-in-law used to let me drink a little of hers, not a lot, just a taste." Lance sipped happily.  "This tastes almost exactly like the ones my brother would make."

 Hunk sniffed and sipped tentatively, "It is good."

 "Please don't get carried away, no more than three or make that two for you Pidge."  Shiro frowned unsure if this was the proper thing to do.

 "Shiro, you are not my parent.  You are like an older brother.  Act like it, be a bad influence once in a while too."  Keith grinned as he sipped.

 "Yeah, be the older frat brother that rolls you over, so you don't choke on your vomit after he gets you to drink way too much."  Lance offered.

 Hunk, Pidge, Keith, and Shiro stared at him.

 "What? Am I the only one that had a life?" Lance chugged the rest of his drink and smiled, "I'm dancing."  He rushed back out to where others were already dancing around the bonfire.

 Hunk shrugged looking at the others, "He's not wrong, we are social rejects."

 "I wasn't."  Shiro objected quietly.

 "Yes, but what are you now, Space Dad."  Pidge snarked.

 Shiro glared at her, downed his drink, and laughed, "Dancing."  He walked away to join Lance, who looked surprised but happy to have Shiro grab him and spin him around.

 "Huh."  Keith offered.

 "It does look like fun."  Hunk decided.

 "Where are Allura and Coran?"  Pidge asked before spotting them lounging at the bar watching the two dancing paladins. Pidge waved them off and headed over to the Alteans.  She was not dancing.

 "So, may I have this dance?"  Hunk asked offering Keith his hand.

 "Why not?"  Keith smiled and they both finished their drinks before heading out to join the other two dancing.

 ***

 Lance woke the next morning sleeping on a cloud.  He smiled and stretched.  He'd danced with everyone he thought, so many smiles and laughs and new dances and Pina Colodas.  He found himself grinning in realization that he had not gotten that drunk and did not have a head ache or naseau this morning, the alien booze must not have been very strong.

 He lowered his bed back to the couch and slipped on a hoodie.  The morning was gray and looked chilly.  He didn't bother with shoes.  He went out to beach and walked along the edge of the water, watching the water come and go and walking in and out of it.  Leaving footprints in the white sand.  The colors were wrong, but it reminded him so strongly of home that he half expected his mama to call him to breakfast.  He closed his eyes thinking of the many mornings he had woke before everyone else and done just this, ever since he was deemed old enough to be trusted to stay out of the water when no one else was around.

 "Lance?" Keith's voice was quiet, but Lance still jumped.

 "You really want to give me a heart attack, don't you?" Lance shook his head, wiping tears on the sleeve of his hoodie.  Keith was dressed in workout clothes and had probably been running as he was sweating and panting a bit.

 "No. You okay?" Keith frowned.

 "Yeah, just really reminds me of home.  It's good, but sad too."  Lance sighed. "I wonder when we will get to go home again or even if we ever will."

 "We will."  Keith stated like it was a fact.

 "You can't know that.  Zarkon has been in power for ten thousand years, do we really think we're going to beat him in a year or two and go home?"

 "Sure, Voltron hasn't been around all that time.  We kick his ass and then go home."  Keith smiled slyly.

 "Sure." Lance shook his head.

 "Seriously though, we have the weapon he has always feared and there has to be a reason. He knows we can beat him.  We will get back home.  It might take a while but we're going."  Keith put an arm around Lance.

 "I like that you're sure."  Lance offered.  He wasn't quite convinced, but it helped that Keith seemed to be.

 "Tell me something you used to do on the beach?  Something we could do today?" Keith pried.

 "Well, sometimes in the summer we would have sandcastle building contests, Mami would judge them."  Lance smiled at the memory and the crazy things he and his siblings had created.

 "We can do that."  Keith nodded. "I've never done that before."

 "You've never built a sandcastle?" Lance asked shocked.

 "Lance, this is the first time I've ever been to a beach like this."  Keith gestured to the horizon.  "It just keeps going.  It's amazing really."

 Lance took several moments to recover, "Okay, so we are building sandcastles, then I'm teaching you to swim in a current like this, and then we are going to make some surfboards.  Oh, and we have to bury you in the sand."  Lance rattled off happily.

 "Bury me?"  Keith raised his eyebrows and frowned.

 "Don't look at me like that.  You cover up like half of the person with sand or maybe up to their neck, depending on what you are doing.  You can just make it look weird like a head in the sand, or make them look like something else, like a mermaid or something.  It feels cool and it's fun and you've never done it so you're trying it. Also, we have to hunt for seashells, do they have those here?  Well even if they don’t, we can still hunt for them and then we'll know."

 Keith smiled in amusement as Lance continued rattling off important things to do as one by one the others joined them.  The sandcastle contest was something to behold.  Pidge had declared that picking teams sucked and had them draw straws. Team one was Keith, Pidge, and Hunk. Team two was Lance, Shiro, and Coran. Allura was the official judge, as obviously a princess knows a lot about castles according to Lance.

 Team One's castle was huge, easily eight feet tall at the peak of the highest tower. It bore a striking resemblance to Cinderella's castle, though not enough to worry about a copyright.  Pidge had created a draw bridge that opened and closed and installed some kind of luminescent shells to the interior to give lighting.  Keith had gathered shells and layered them on the towers to act like tile roofs.  It was overall very striking.

 Team Two's castle looked like a flying alien city.  It wasn't as tall only about six foot at the top of the central spire, but the towers were decorated with glass and there were spirals of glass in different colors that shot up throughout the castle.  Pidge argued it was cheating.  Lance argued it was just hot sand and why shouldn't they make it since they had Shiro on their team.

 Allura declared it a tie over their bickering and told them to come to lunch.  She had a picnic delivered to the beach and they sat on blankets and ate something that looked like peanut butter and jelly - if the peanut butter was made with beans instead of peanuts and the jelly was bacon flavored.

 After the meal they all laid out and took a nap.  It was crazy to relax like this and it had really been too long.  Pidge had started to creep away to a laptop, but Allura caught her by the wrist.

 "Pidge, everything needs to recharge sometime, even you.  Give yourself this time and when you get back you will be more prepared and will work faster."  Allura begged.  "We can't work ourselves to death; there is no one to take our places."

 Pidge paused pondering what Allura had said and then nodded, curling back up on the blanket and snuggling into Hunk's side.  Allura allowed herself to relax again.  This was something they all needed.

 The swimming lessons commenced after.  Keith wasn't a bad swimmer and Lance only had to rescue him once before he listened to his fellow paladin about the dangers of the undertow.  Hunk splashed right along with them as did Allura.  Coran, Shiro, and Pidge stayed on the shoreline. Pidge said she was part robot and water was bad for her.  Shiro waved his own anchor of an arm as an excuse and Coran simply laughed and said they couldn't teach an old warbraxlian like himself any new things.    Lance was an amazing swimmer and Keith had a hard time keeping his eyes off of him.  He even challenged the princess to a race.  He lost, but he claimed her shifting into something with flippers was cheating anyway.

 Keith was shocked at how exhausted he was when he came out of the water and how heavy his body felt.  Swimming in the ocean was really a lot more tiring than a pool, Lance had been right. Lance grabbed him a towel to lay down on and declared it was time to bury him, so he could take a nap.

 When Keith woke to a mermaid tale and breasts he had to clamor out of the sand and chase Lance around the beach for a while until he caught him and dragged him back to the towel and declared it was his turn.  Lance complained he would have been fine with the mermaid body, but Keith gave him the body of a middle-aged man with a beer gut.  Pidge carefully documented both, though the boys were not yet aware of it.  They would be when she needed something.

 They were making preparations for the evening meal when an alarm sounded on a device Allura was carrying.  She frowned and tapped at it, before sighing and turning to the others.  

 "I'm sorry everyone, but we will need to cut this short.  There has been a Galra fleet detected in the vicinity of an alliance planet.  We need to get there and be ready to defend them if needed."  Allura smiled sadly at the paladins, to their credit they all nodded without complaint.  She was proud of them.  "Let's have everything packed and be in the shuttle as quickly as possible.  I would like to wormhole out tonight."

 The packing went smoothly.  They had all been aware that this was a possibility and had made accommodations to allow for quick pack ups.  

 Crowded back in the shuttle on the way to the castle, Lance leaned his head against Keith's shoulder, "How was your first beach trip?”

 “It was good.”  Keith smiled softly.

 “Sorry we didn't get to go surfing or hunt sea shells." Lance frowned

 "It's okay."  Keith shrugged.  "There wasn't anything we could do."

 "I know, but I guess we did a lot." Lance suddenly quirked a smile, “We can go surfing and hunt sea shells when we get home.”

 "I would like that.  I could see myself living on a beach someday." Keith smiled over at Lance.

 "Oh yeah, maybe we could be neighbors?"  Lance smiled thinking about his dreamhouse on the beach.

 Keith hummed and turned so that his violet eyes were staring straight into Lance's ocean blues, "Maybe we could be closer than that."

 "Oh yeah?"  Lance blinked and licked his lips, before grinning mischievously, "So roomies, huh?"  Hunk choked on laughter and Pidge swatted him in the back of the head, but Lance just laughed at the frustrated look on Keith's face, before leaning back against his shoulder and closing his eyes.

 "I could find room for a mullet in my dream house."  Lance muttered as his breathing slowed and evened into sleep.  

 Keith smiled down at him and wondered what he was getting himself into.

[purkinje-effect]

The Anatomy of Melancholy, 41

Table of Contents. Second Instar, Chapter 8. Go to previous. Go to next. In a wasteland survival fic, does this chapter constitute schmoop?

________________________________

Locked up in his head as they walked along the modular concrete hallways of the Research and Development wing, ‘Choly had just shared with Angel what Olivia had described of the base, and their plans for the next day. He wanted to avoid this building as much as possible.

“Sir, allow me to take you across grounds,” Angel insisted alongside him. “You just installed these handles and footrests on me, and you should--”

“--I’m fhhine,” he slurred, waving a hand at the Handy. “Just trying to draft the order of... how to go about settling back in. How to cover the least distance. Optimize the path to a bed, if I can.”

“You don’t seem fine, but I won’t press it... Perhaps you’d like to start with the enlisted barracks, and work your way over to the officers’ barracks? You could... start things off with a nice, hot shower? Hm-hm?”

He stuttered awe under his breath in Russian, and tried to ignore any suggestion that he looked as inebriated as he felt.

“They have hot water?” he mouthed at Angel.

“Deenwood hosts so many things! Come along now. It’s already past nineteenth hour, and you’ve told Miss Olivia that we’ll rejoin at sixth tomorrow. We must get you washed and dressed and fed.” It chortled anxiously. “Thank you, for at least letting me escort you.”

“There’s just something about being on base again that’s making me feel... right,” he defended, implicitly begging that it let him enjoy the moment. “You’re more than just my mobility, Angel. So much more.”

Halfway across the courtyard, a Mister Gutsy intercepted them.

“Captain,” it grunted in affirmative. “I’ve been tasked with running errands for you tonight. Give the order.”

“Ah, yes... Green Three?” he fielded, gauging by the white lettering on its dull green side. He’d never really noticed non-personnel G.A. robots went by designations, but it made sense. “I... I suppose it’s gauche for me to be on base in anything but uniform, all things considered. Could you outfit me fresh?”

“Yes, Sir!” G-3′s triplicate golden ocular lenses scrutinized his form before stiffening in place. “Measurements taken.”

“That’s all for now. Angel and I are headed to the showers at the enlisted barracks.”

“Deliver the uniform to Mister Handy nicknamed Angel, at the enlisted barracks’ baths. Roger.” It sped off toward the storage building which stood between the R&D wing they’d just exited and the Robotics wing--the only three hangar-like concrete structures on the property.

The two of them arrived at the enlisted barracks at the North end of the property. To the left lay the soldiers’ quarters, while to the right lay the community showers. The enlisted mess hall stood separate from this building behind it. Without hesitation he turned right, then right again into the men’s side, and handed Angel his cane so that he could disrobe. He deposited his Pip-Boy, visor, orthotics, hairpins, and clothing on a bench in the changing area. The notion of a working shower possessed him, carrying one step in front of the last, and before he knew it, he was turning the handle and standing directly under the water without even testing the temperature first, or checking that he was, in fact, all alone with Angel keeping watch.

Soon both the water and his relieved bliss ran hot down his cheeks. He shut his trembling eyes and lifted his face to the apparent water pressure. He left his mouth open a moment to trap water, which he squirted out for effect. After some time his head dipped, to let the hot water stream down his aching neck and back. Angel eventually interrupted his detachment from reality. Being handed his toiletries got him crying like at a wedding.

Lathering his hair, ‘Choly thought to his initial impression to encountering Olivia again like this. Her smart style with one side shaved that apparently compensated for a balding patch, her thick phlegmatic voice, her exposed turbinates, her... her... He really was attracted to ghouls now, wasn’t he? He remembered his promise to Angel--use Rad-X--and ribald notions of both Olivia and Hawthorne alike melted him apart where he stood.

He stood. Angel was right. He didn’t remember standing this much in a day, in months. His blood pressure didn’t feel like it had dipped or spiked. His posture didn’t feel especially infirm. He still ached, and the cane still made the going easier... but he didn’t quite feel himself.

I should be crumpled over by now, bathing on a folding chair, he reasoned. I spent my morning repairing Bogey. It told me about the Rust Devils. I blew an hour on a bucket of golf balls. I traveled nearly two hours atop Angel without stopping, and avoided a Rust Devil attack right when we got to Chelmsford. I found out one of my coworkers survived and is still alive, and we got drunk... “And now I’m standing in the first hot shower I’ve had in two hundred years, waiting for the water to run cold and slap me in the face so I wake up. Too much for one day. Too much in so many ways.”

When he finally turned the water off, he dried himself and sat on the bench in the changing area. The Gutsy had brought a folded khaki uniform and a set of skivvies to match, combat boots in his size, and also a navy bathrobe. He slipped on the tee, underwear, and robe once his skin was dry enough, but didn’t tie the waist. His eyes widened as he toweled at his hair.

“Or maybe the problem is, I feel exactly like myself.”

He favored the ankle stability of a boot, over low quarters like his oxfords. Lacking confirmation that any living persons but Olivia and himself existed on this base, he remained in the bathrobe for the rest of the night. As he put his Pip-Boy back on, he noticed his orthotics, Vault Suit, and Pharm Corps coat had gone missing, only because his nameplate and bars lay on the bench atop the folded fresh uniform.

“Did G-3 take my effects, Angel?” he called.

“G-3 said that it waited until you had a convenient time to change clothes, to take them. It boasted that it knew a thing or two about getting out blood stains. As do I ! I tried to tell it that I could operate laundry equipment with my sensors disabled, but it insisted that I stay by you, as your escort.” Angel reentered the baths to hover before him. “My word, Sir. I... I have to say how good it is to be back at Deenwood. We robots might have our exceptions with one another, but we were a complex and thriving network of chums. Just as you befriended your colleagues.”

‘Choly stared at the rectangular brooch of metal and brightly dyed embroidered ribbon, signifying ten years of stripes and pips mounted together. What did he really have to show for his decade of service? His throat caught at length, until he pinned his nameplate and bars to the robe in lieu of his coat.

“I... didn’t have friends,” he finally said in passing, starting toward the front door. “I haven’t eaten since breakfast. Finally hungry enough to do something about it. Shall we see if the officers’ mess hall’s furnished?”

They crossed South to the officers’ side of the property in the brisk night air. Entering the mess hall, he encountered a modestly cozy arrangement of vinyl-upholstered chrome chairs in sets of four at eight round tables. Large fake potted plants tucked themselves to each corner, and beside each support column. To one side of the space, he’d have found the beverage offerings, while to the other, he found an à la carte window winged by a pair of Eat-O-Tronic machines. In one, he found MREs, and in the other, he would have found desserts. After his experience with the pharmacy break room, it relieved him to find no moldy remains in the vending slots; in the same stroke, he praised the base’s stockpile of perfectly preserved rations. He eagerly selected the beef tips and mashed potatoes package, but before he could get it open, the Mister Handy at the window hemmed and held out a pincer.

“Monsieur, if I could get that for you,” it began, in a French accent.

“...Yes, of course.” He handed it over dumbly. “Thank you.”

“My pleasure!” In a flash, it produced a tray with the now-heated contents of the MRE on a plate, including the instant cocoa packet. “Bon appetit!”

“...I could have... Oh, no matter.” Angel zipped over to at least pull the chair for ‘Choly. “Sir, while you dine, I’d love the chance to catch up with Louis, if I may. I’ll be within earshot.” It didn’t await confirmation before darting behind the swinging door in the far corner.

The potatoes couldn’t help tasting like cardboard two hundred years later, but the beef tendered up like it had never been preserved in a jerky-like state, and the gravy had him lolling back in the chair to savor it. The soy-based cocoa struck him as an innocent indulgence amid the options he’d had in prior months. The hot mug in his hands comforted him, and he couldn’t help but smile dopily at hearing the two Mister Handies in the kitchen chatting and laughing unintelligibly.

Angel’s not lonely here.

'Choly took his tray back to the window once he was done, and he and Angel thanked Louis and bid it goodnight. The walk from the mess hall was short, but was incumbent of the most anticipated part of the night for him. The officers’ residential block was a set of three identical rows of twelve two-story rowhouses apiece. Habitually, he walked up the three steps of the second row’s third door, like always, and opened the front door on bated breath. Standing in the entryway, he flicked on the light switch to find the electricity worked, and he smiled in distraction as he took in the thick layer of dust on every surface. The dark green velour couch and armchair were still there, as were the hanging floor lamp, the coffee table, and the kitchen table and chairs.

“I have my work cut out for me,” Angel beamed. It shut the door behind them and immediately set to dusting off the living room.

Compulsion seized him again, and he mounted the creaking stairs at a persistent, lurching pace until he stood in the doorway of what had once been his bedroom. The queen size mattress lay bare before him, in tact. His throat caught again, aghast, and he slumped against the door frame to gawk. It took a few tries before he successfully swallowed. Angel came up behind him after a spell.

“Oh Sir, are you all right?”

He looked to it with a haunted desperation.

“Nothing has felt this right since I thawed.”

He sniffed, and leveraged with his cane to stand fully again. He requested a canister of water, his toothbrush and toothpaste, mouthwash, and hairbrush, which Angel obliged, and he vanished into the upstairs bathroom closing the door behind him.

As he brushed his teeth, he stared at himself in the hoary glass mounted on the wall. A single crack ran from one corner to the other, right through the middle, but for the most part, the mirror functioned like a mirror. He nearly felt like the whole base had been transfigured by some perverse stasis just like he had, all but sheltered from the end of the world and here awaiting him all this time. He shivered and cinched his robe, then spat and moved on to the mouthwash.

Simple hygiene really is a luxury now, isn’t it? he thought to himself as he rinsed his face.

He came out of the bathroom to find that Angel had made his bed with the hospital blanket and pillows before vanishing back downstairs. He sat on the edge of the bed to remove his boots and socks, and brushed out his hair which had finally dried by then. The brush went to the nightstand, and he hung the robe on the hook on the bathroom door. He turned out the lights, and passed out face-down in anticipation of the first quality sleep he’d gotten in two hundred years.

Go to Next »»»

[dyingthinroses]

Activity cal counter

here is a list of the calories you burn doing each activity

TRIGGER WARNING: EATING DISORDER

30 minutes of these activities for a 120 lb person, will burn: Gym Activities Aerobics, low impact: 158 Aerobics, high impact: 202 Aerobics, Step low impact: 202 Aerobics, Step high impact: 288 Aerobics, water: 115 Bicycling, Stationery, moderate: 202 Bicycling, Stationery, vigorous: 302 Calisthenics, vigorous: 230 Calisthenics, moderate: 130 Circuit Training, general: 230 Elliptical Trainer, general: 259 Riders: general (ie., HealthRider): 144 Rowing, Stationery, moderate: 202 Rowing, Stationery, vigorous: 245 Ski Machine general: 274 Stair Step Machine general: 173 Stretching, Hatha Yoga: 115 Teaching aerobics: 173 Weight Lifting: general 86 Weight Lifting: vigorous 173

Training and Sport ActivitiesArchery: non-hunting 101 Badminton general: 130 Basketball playing a game: 230 Basketball wheelchair: 187 Billiards: 72 Bicycling BMX or mountain: 245 Bicycling 12-13.9 mph: 230 Bicycling 14-15.9 mph: 288 Bicycling 16-19 mph: 346 Bicycling > 20 mph: 475 Bowling: 86Boxing sparring: 259 Curling: 115Dancing Fast, ballet, twist: 173 Dancing disco, ballroom, square: 158 Dancing slow, waltz, foxtrot: 86 Fencing: 173Football competitive: 259 Football touch, flag, general: 230 Frisbee: 86Golf carrying clubs: 158 Golf using cart: 101 Gymnastics general: 115 Handball general: 346 Hang Gliding: 101 Hiking cross-country: 173 Hockey field & ice: 230 Horseback Riding: general 115 Ice Skating general: 202 Kayaking: 144 Martial Arts judo, karate, kickbox: 288 Orienteering: 259 Race Walking: 187 Racquetball competitive: 288 Racquetball casual, general: 202 Rock Climbing ascending: 317 Rock Climbing rapelling: 230 Rollerblade Skating: 202 Rope Jumping: 288 Running 5 mph (12 min/mile): 230 Running 5.2 mph (11.5 min/mile): 259 Running 6 mph (10 min/mile): 288 Running 6.7 mph (9 min/mile): 317 Running 7.5 mph (8 min/mile): 360 Running 8.6 mph (7 min/mile): 418 Running 10 mph (6 min/mile): 475 Running pushing wheelchair, marathon wheeling: 230 Running cross-country: 259 Scuba or skin diving: 202 Skateboarding: 144 Skiing: cross-country: 230 Skiing: downhill: 173 Sledding, luge, toboggan: 202 Snorkeling: 144 Snow Shoeing: 230 Soccer general: 202 Softball general play: 144 Swimming general: 173 Swimming laps, vigorous: 288 Swimming backstroke: 230 Swimming breaststroke: 288 Swimming butterfly: 317 Swimming crawl: 317 Swimming treading, vigorous: 288 Tai Chi: 115 Tennis general: 202 Volleyball non-competitive,general play: 86 Volleyball competitive, gymnasium play: 115 Volleyball beach: 230 Walk 3.5 mph (17 min/mi): 115 Walk 4 mph (15 min/mi): 130 Walk 4.5 mph (13 min/mi): 144 Walk/Jog (jog 10 min): 173 Water Skiing: 173 Water Polo: 288 Water Volleyball: 86 Whitewater (rafting, kayaking): 144 Wrestling 173

Outdoor Activities Carrying & stacking wood: 144 Chopping & splitting wood: 173 Digging, spading dirt: 144 Gardening (general): 130 Gardening (weeding): 133 Laying sod / crushed rock:144 Mowing Lawn (push, hand): 158 Mowing Lawn (push, power): 130 Operate Snow Blower (walking): 130 Planting seedlings, shrubs: 115 Plant trees: 130 Raking Lawn: 115 Sacking grass or leaves: 115 Shoveling Snow (by hand): 173

Home and Daily Life Activities Child-care (bathing, feeding, etc.): 101 Child games (hop-scotch, jacks,etc.): 144 Cooking: 72 Food Shopping (with cart): 101 Heavy Cleaning (wash car, windows): 130 Moving (household furniture): 173 Moving (carrying boxes): 202 Moving (unpacking): 101 Playing w/kids (moderate effort): 115 Playing w/kids (vigorous effort): 144 Reading: sitting: 32 Standing in line: 36 Sleeping: 18 Watching TV: 22 Home Repair/ Auto Repair: 86 Carpentry: (outside) 173 Carpentry: (refinish furniture) 130 Cleaning rain gutters: 144 Hanging storm windows: 144 Lay or remove carpet/tile: 130 Paint house: (outside) 144 Paint, paper, remodel: (inside) 130 Roofing: 173 Wiring and Plumbing: 86

Occupational Activities Bartending/Server: 72 Carpentry Work: 101 Coaching Sports: 115 Coal Mining: 173 Computer Work: 40 Construction, general: 158 Desk Work: 50 Firefighting: 346 Forestry, general: 230 Heavy Equip. Operator: 72 Heavy Tools, not power: 230 Horse Grooming: 173 Light Office Work: 43 Masonry: 202 Masseur, standing: 115 Police Officer: 72 Sitting in Class: 50 Sitting in Meetings: 47 Steel Mill: (general) 230 Theater Work: 86 Truck Driving: sitting : 86

[kerlonrat]

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[fountainpenguin]

17 Facts About V.P. Longwood

July 17th is a pretty cool day. Two years ago today, “Excitement” (the first chapter of 130 Reasons Why I’m Fairy Trash) made its debut.

If you’ve forgotten, “Excitement” is the one-shot where Sanderson and several other pixies took young Gary and Betty (and Betty’s little brother Kenny, who grows up to be the sole employee of Burger World) to an amusement park, and brought the children on a roller coaster explicitly designed to terrify them and turn them from their love of fun to a love for safety.

One of the characters we met in that one-shot was Mr. Longwood, the vice president of Pixies Inc. Longwood is a character I first created towards the end of Baby, You’re a Rich Man, and we were actually introduced to him for the first time when H.P. and Sanderson found him and the rest of his search party taking a break at the soda bar, and Sanderson muses that “it takes skill to organize a search party this distractible and useless”.

It always seemed odd to me that despite H.P. obviously liking Sanderson enough to allow the guy to follow him around all day and assist him with all his schemes, Sanderson seems to work in the complaints department, which doesn’t sound all that impressive. I imagined that if Sanderson wasn’t H.P.’s real second in command, then maybe in my fanfics I should create a pixie who was and could be a source of conflict. Thus, Vice President Longwood was born.

Longwood is the freckle-faced pixie you see up there with the star on his cap and his hair all scruffy at the back of his head. In addition to the 130 Prompts and Rich Man, he’s also a major character in Origin of the Pixies born in Chapter 19, “Allowances”. He’s the fourth of H.P.’s asexually-reproduced offspring, and although H.P. had originally intended to make Sanderson his heir, he eventually selected Longwood as the future Head Pixie after him instead.

I find Longwood a colorful character who is a lot of fun to include in my works, whether I’m writing from H.P.’s perspective as he praises Longwood or Sanderson’s perspective as he denounces him. Although he is a character of my own creation and not canon to the FOP universe, I hope that you guys have enjoyed him anyway.

Even if you don’t, hopefully you enjoy today’s post. Because without further ado, I bring you... 17 Facts You Probably Didn’t Know or May Have Forgotten About Longwood. Backed by snippets from upcoming or deleted scenes in my works.

1) Longwood is an old-fashioned romantic.

Because we hear a lot of negative things about Longwood from Sanderson, I thought this one deserved saying. Sanderson makes Longwood sound like a hormonal maniac who would betray the pixie race for a kiss from any random pretty girl, but that’s not exactly true. I actually designed Longwood to be a quiet, sweet, old-fashioned little guy to contrast him with blunt and forward H.P., and snarky, stubborn Sanderson.

Longwood crossed his arms. “Despite what Sanderson may claim, sir, I’m not that easy. My kisses are special.”

~ “Where Origins End”; Origin of the Pixies

Lust is not Longwood’s fatal flaw. Longwood doesn’t seek out people to kiss because he’s full of raging hormones. He’s into committed relationships.

Take everything Sanderson says about Longwood with a grain of salt. Sometimes he tells the truth, but most of the time, he’s just jealous.

2) When Longwood becomes Head Pixie, he plans to change the alignment of the Pixie civilization to True Neutral.

"[37-year plans are] not Pixie tradition. It's just H.P.'s… thing. He just won't let it go. But when I'm in charge, there will be no more aggressive attempts to get the Fairies to treat us like we're more than just a servant race if they don't want to. There are five hundred of us against a million of them; there's no chance to change their minds. We're going to accept who we are, and nobody is going to get hurt anymore. We'll be going passively-aggressive neutral, all day, all the time. Just like Mother Nature intended."

~ “Terrible Timing”; 130 Prompts

Nobody likes true neutral, Longwood.

3) Longwood’s freckles mark him as a pixie of a high rank, so he tends to be the first pixie that people greet besides H.P.

Which can often lead to misunderstandings, as Anti-Cosmo found out.

I concealed my yawn behind my hand. My eyes trailed to a pair of pixies hovering at the doorway. One of them was Mr. Sanderson. The other was taller, freckled, with his black hair flat in the front but distinctly scruffy in the back. A small star clung to the tip of his hat, much like H.P.’s, except that this hat was small and pointed like the others instead of sharing the floppiness of the Head’s cohuleen druith. I drifted over to them. Sanderson sensed me coming and bobbed between me and the unfamiliar pixie, but I looked over his head anyway. “Are you the pixie ambassador?” I asked.

The freckled pixie raised his eyebrows above his shades. He leaned to the side and gestured at Mr. Sanderson. “No. Sanderson knows more about Council meetings than I do. Since the leprechauns are upset with H.P., Sanderson is attending the proceedings in his stead today. I’m his escort companion to ensure he makes it safely home.”

“Oh.” I shifted my attention down to Mr. Sanderson, recognizing from the slight bulge at his lip that he had clenched his teeth in silent annoyance. I flicked my ears back to signal my apologies. “The gyne freckles are what threw me.”

“I understand, High Count,” Mr. Sanderson replied smartly. “No offense taken.” He extended his right hand, palm tilted sideways. “This is the first time we have ever been officially introduced on equal terms. I go by Sanderson. Sanderson Chipixie.”

He pronounced it shih, like shih-pixie. He left the ‘Mister’ off his name. Well. I suppose, if that’s what he asked to be called, I would accommodate, but it would certainly take some getting used to. I took his hand slowly with my own right. “Anti-Cosmo Anti-Cosma.”

Our effervescence mingled, his warm and tingly, wrapping around my wrist like a braid. I fought the urge to squirm. Sanderson released me and stepped to the side, allowing the pixie gyne to offer his hand too. When he shook it up and down, it made the tiny star clinging to the end of his floating hat jingle just a bit. “Longwood Mayfleet,” he said. “Vice president of Pixies Inc., and therefore heir apparent to the position of Head Pixie.”

“Really?” I resisted the urge to glance at Sanderson when he said that, because I hadn’t missed the way his fists had suddenly gone tight at his sides. When Longwood let go of my hand, I stood back. “Well, then I suppose it’s possible I’ll be attending your coronation some future day.”

~ “Reign Fall”; Frayed Knots

4) Although Sanderson and Longwood are rivals, their anti-pixie counterparts are best friends.

Anti-Sanderson overthrew the Anti-H.P. and became Head Anti-Pixie. Since he considers Anti-Longwood a clueless, drooling dope too dumb to ever think of betraying him, he views Anti-Longwood as one of his most trusted henchmen. Anti-Longwood can often be found driving Anti-Sanderson around in his silly little Jeep.

I lifted my head at a sound not unlike squeaking wheels. Then I squinted. “What the…?”

A tiny pink car, just smaller than a golf cart and without a roof, puttered around one of the bends in the road. A glaze-eyed drake with a face full of emerald freckles was driving it. Anti-Sanderson had his rear planted on the back of the car and his feet in the seat, his clawed hands gripping his spread-apart knees. He removed his sire’s floppy blue hat from his head and waved it when he saw us.

“Anti-Schnozmo! H-Pix! You came to visit little old me.”

~ “The Rise of Anti-Sanderson”; Origin of the Pixies

Poof mentioned in the 130 Prompt “Opinion” that Goldie’s counterpart, Anti-Marigold, is actually in possession of this Jeep by the time he and Foop are about to enter high school.

5) Being a type of pixie called a gyne, Longwood processes things slightly differently than non-freckled pixies do.

Longwood has an easier time putting himself in the shoes of others than most pixies, as putting oneself in another’s shoes is a trait that is mostly “turned off” in the mind of a drone pixie. This is a trait H.P. desires in a future Head Pixie, but Longwood has always struggled with feelings that he doesn’t fit in with his “brothers” because of it.

"But- but-" Longwood held his hands over his face. "How do you know you made the right choice? Why are you so sure that I can do this, sir? I mean, I think I'm brave, but that's it. My only claim to fame is that I'm not afraid of anything. Sanderson's afraid of snow, Hawkins is afraid of needles, Wilcox is afraid of snakes, Caudwell's afraid of rustling paper, and Bayard's afraid of the dark, and I'm- I'm not afraid of anything. I've never been afraid of anything. Why am I like this? What's wrong with me?"

The Purple Robe and I exchanged a glance. He lifted his hand in clear indication that I should field this one. I rubbed my brow. "Mister Longwood, what are your intentions in questioning my decisions?"

"How do you know I'll be a good marquess?" he demanded, dropping his hands. They clenched into soft fists in front of his chest. "You don't know me. Why would you want me to be the next Head Pixie? Me, out of everyone? I'm different than all the other pixies."

"Different? I… hadn't noticed."

"I'm a freak!"

I tightened my grip on my staff. "Longwood, you know I don't like the 'f' word. Nor do I care for this emotion you're exhibiting."

He shook his head. "But I am! H.P., I don't fit in with the other pixies. Sometimes I say things, and they look at me like I'm stupid."

"What sorts of things?"

"I don't know. When you were gone, sometimes they got mad at Ambrosine. I'd tell them to try seeing things the way Ambrosine sees them, like when he's been working hard and he's stressed, that it's hard to meet all of our needs at once, and they needed to think about and understand that. But the way they stared at me, like I was illogical- I was so humiliated. Or if I ever suggested we go anywhere, like in the woods, they thought it was weird that I would just get up and go. Even Hawkins. Just stuff like that. And I'm not good with smells like they are, and they always seem to know how to stand perfectly without getting in the way and move around crazy fast without bumping into each other, and I don't understand, sir. Why should I be Head Pixie when I'm some kind of…" He pushed his fist across his eyes. "Mutated weirdo."

~ “Playing With the Big Kids”; Origin of the Pixies

When Longwood mentions that the other pixies always seem to avoid bumping into each other, he’s referencing one of the traits of drones that exceeds that of gynes: Recognizing pressure changes in the air. This is the same trait that allows bees to swarm together. Longwood lacks the ability to sense when the other pixies are about to change direction, and tends to crash into them- much to their annoyance.

6) Having been taught to suppress emotions from the time he was young, Longwood actually has no sense of what behavior is and isn’t considered scandalous.

Which is something that H.P. thinks is hilarious.

Longwood shifted his weight between his feet. “She’s, um… she’s kind of my damefriend. [My first kiss happened] at a party when we both got pretty crazy.”

I paused. “When was this?”

“Uh… Like 20,000 years ago. It was her birthday. We went on a walk along one of the Plane 7 rivers. The leaves were beautiful, and we fell behind the group, and… and it just sort of happened.”

“I see. Did it go any further than kissing?”

He tugged his tie. “Promise you won’t be mad?”

“I’d like to hear the truth. I won’t interfere unless there’s a danger to the company.”

Longwood lowered his voice. “We caught up to the group, and we held hands, sir. For like five minutes. In public.”

I tightened my lips and nodded. “Holding hands. Yep. That’s pretty extreme. You… you keep a lid on those hormones, Longwood.”

~ “Letters and Numbers”; Origin of the Pixies

7) Longwood prioritizes the comfort of others over his own wants- an uncommon trait among pixies.

Most pixies tend to be strict and nitpicky when it comes to dealing with others. They prefer order, and like things done their way. Pixies have a reputation for being stubborn for a reason. However, Longwood is one of the most compromising pixies you’ll ever meet- a trait that tends to get him into a lot of trouble, but also makes him someone that outsiders enjoy working with. 

“Longwood,” I whispered, “I can’t do this. I can’t stay in here. Nothing in here is organized. I’m going to have a meltdown. In front of all these people.”

“Really?” He looked again around the Temple. “I thought you’d like solving the puzzles and filling in the coloring sheets.”

“I will. Oh, I will. Longwood, I’m glad you have the ability to focus on just one thing at a time. To set up just three of a hundred dominos, to rotate a wheel filled with beads just half a turn, to flip an hourglass over when it hasn’t timed out, to roll a play cloudcar a short ways across the floor, and then move on with your life.” I met his gaze, tugging my hat lower. “But if you start me on this, I swear I am not leaving until every one of these puzzles is done at the same time, and stabilized that way. And I do not care how many nymphs or full-grown adults I have to bowl over to do so. Either let me absolutely loose, or get me out of here- now.”

Longwood didn’t wait a beat. He placed his hands on my back and steered me outside again, and down the front steps of the Temple.

~ “Letters and Numbers”; Origin of the Pixies

8) Longwood is one of the only pixies who refused to drink underage; he chose to stand his ground and side with the law rather than H.P.

“All right. No ceremonial coming of age kiss. Well, if we’re not going to be spending the evening witnessing a dance, we may as well just go out instead.” I picked up my coat and pulled it on while Sanderson watched from the stairs. “Where do you fancy? Preferably someplace with soda.”

Longwood sized me up with a rueful sideways glance. “H.P., I’m 174,000. Adult wings or not, I can’t legally drink until I’m over age of majority in another 25,000 years.”

“… Right. I knew that. So where do you want to go?

~ “Letters and Numbers”; Origin of the Pixies

9) Against all odds, Sanderson actually ended up with a girlfriend before Longwood did. Obviously, they have different priorities.

“But that’s dumb. I’m not getting anything out of this relationship. It’s just a lot of work. What if- what if-” He took his cowlicks in his fist. “Sir, what if I dump her, and Longwood gets a damefriend, and then I don’t have one?”

I pressed my steepled fingertips to my lips. “Sanderson, why are you courting Idona?”

His other hand clenched. He pressed his knuckles down on the edge of my desk. “Because she’s something I have that Longwood doesn’t. She’s mine. I’m better than him because I have a damefriend, and he can’t earn one. He’s not good enough.”

“Is that a good reason to court a damsel, or a petty reason?”

“It’s a good reason!” Now Sanderson slapped both palms on my desk, leaning forward. “Sir, I’m your firstborn, I’m your alpha retinue, but you favor him above me. You give him special training. You give him special projects. You give him special rules. It’s not fair! He’s a kleptomaniac. Idona’s the only thing that’s mine that he’s not going to take away from me. Let me have this.”

I thought about that for a minute. Then, slowly, I folded my arms against my stomach. “Maybe the reason that Longwood doesn’t have a damefriend is because he’s more mature than you are. Instead of the other way around.”

~ “On the Notion of Cutting Ties”; Origin of the Pixies

10) Longwood is one of very few pixies who will obey the commands of authority figures without checking in with H.P. first.

“My name is Sergeant Briskwell, and I will be overseeing this platoon. Please surrender your sunglasses along with any other items that you imagine we would confiscate if we found, such as needles, letter openers, knives, and any type of candy. Listen carefully as I go over my speech once again. I ask that you hold as still as possible while the fitters see about your sizes for your uniforms.”

Longwood removed his shades at once, but the other three looked to me. I inclined my head. There was no real reason to resist. Four sets of shades piled up in Briskwell’s hand, along with two handfuls of sugary sweets courtesy of a sheepish Hawkins.

~ “Nymphs Go to War”; Origin of the Pixies

This of course has to do with him being a gyne instead of a drone. Drone pixies automatically defer to the most dominant gyne in the area- In this case, that would be the Head Pixie. Being a gyne himself, Longwood lacks this instinct. As he’s been taught to obey commands, he automatically did so without thinking about it.

11) If given a choice, Longwood actually would have loved for Sanderson to be vice president instead of him.

He stood up so fast, he thrust my desk into my stomach. The neutral stare dropped from his face. “That’s why you made me vice president! Not because I worked hard and deserve it, but because you have a smoofing biological instinct that told you to! My- my pheromones or something did it. I don’t want to be the prince of destiny! It’s not worth it, sir. Why can’t you ever just look at us like we’re more than the weaknesses and strengths of our biology? Can’t you treat us like we’re people? We’re your family!”

~ “Kiss of Life”; Origin of the Pixies

12) In “Terrible Timing”, Longwood has to write things down on sticky notes, and mentions in passing that he’s no longer allowed to keep his preferred notebook on hand. 

He’ll lose that privilege, among others, towards the end of Origin of the Pixies. "Terrible Timing” takes place during the episode “Crocker Shocker”, so it’s been awhile.

I still trusted Longwood for his deliberate thoughtfulness, his instant obedience, his calculated words, his listening skills, his unflinching support, his ability to make his own decisions. 

But those exact same traits simultaneously left him exposed to being manipulated in this way. He’d split apart my faith on his ability to be careful, his duty to put the needs of the company above his individual wants. Never again would he be privy to such classified information, leave Pixie World unaccompanied, carry so many keys, or even keep on hand the notebook he used to take notes in during meetings. I would not confide in him any longer. It was his fate. It was decided. Being a gyne possibly explained his actions, but it did not excuse them.

~ “Fortunate Horizons”; Origin of the Pixies

In Chapter 9 of Baby, You’re a Rich Man and in the 130 Prompt “Solo”, H.P. again hints that Longwood isn’t allowed out of Pixie World unaccompanied. Longwood hates this policy, but doesn’t have the courage to argue even all these thousands of years later.

13) Longwood was very attached to a young pixie named Aspen, even referring to Aspen as “his baby” in Pink and Gray.

This is something that’s been hinted at a few times now in various pieces, but will only be given full backstory late in Origin of the Pixies. Longwood plays an antagonistic role in Pink and Gray in his attempts to treat Betty and Kenny as his surrogate children.

"I liked your singing," Betty told him. "You sing very well."

Longwood glanced over at her, pulling Kenny's blankets up to his shoulder. "Thank you for your response. I wasn't sure I would. It's been centuries since I've sung to a child." He picked a large plush shark up from the nightstand and tucked it under Kenny's arm. Kenny snuggled up to it and instantly went right back to sleep.

"Do you have kids?" She hoped he'd say yes. She hadn't seen any pixie kids yet. True, Sanderson said she and Gary couldn't live in Pixie World forever or else they'd run out of air to breathe, but Betty hoped they'd visit enough that she could make friends with some pixie kids. Did her Earth friends think she was dead? H.P. had made it sound like they did, or would soon enough. She couldn't go back to Kansas. No more friends. No more family. No more horses. No more softball. No more school. Betty was trying not to think about that.

"I… had a kid, yes," Longwood said. "He's gone."

"Where does he live now?"

Longwood looked at her more seriously. "I mean, he's gone. He isn't ever coming back."

"Oh. That kind of gone." Betty looked again at the shark he'd given Kenny. "So is that a dead person's toy?"

"Aspen's not dead," Longwood snapped, and Betty jumped at the shoulders. He inhaled through his teeth. "My apologies for startling you, but I always have to express my disagreement when people state that. Aspen isn't entirely dead. He's still in there. I can recognize tells of it sometimes. He's just… not as alive as he could be." He scratched his wrist, long nails scraping his skin. "I'm sorry. Aspen was my baby. I know it was highly unprofessional of me, but I grew attached to him."

Kenny stirred in the bed, but didn't get up. "I'd be so sad if anything happened to Kenny," Betty murmured. "I'm sorry. Did someone kidnap Aspen? Or did he run away?"

"No. No, he didn't run!" Longwood's throat briefly strangled his voice. "He was so trusting. Sanderson cornered him, and he didn't even–think–when I saw–No." He shook his head. "No. You would need a full lesson in Fairykind anatomy to understand exactly what happened, Ms. Betty. It's black magic stuff. I'm sorry. Anything involving Aspen is very difficult for me to discuss, and I would prefer not to breach the subject with a child I just met, you realize."

~ “Unfundamental Attribution Error”; Pink and Gray

14) Longwood has asthma.

This one doesn’t come up much, but when H.P. had the twins Mullins and Tolbert, it pretty much knocked him out of commission. In my works, when Fairy or pixie fathers give birth, they have to bestow some of their magic on their children when their kids are born. Having twins left H.P. mostly drained, so Longwood gave them some of his magic instead. Since he was young, it took more out of him than it would have taken from H.P. He’s still recovering from the effects.

On that note, Cosmo did not have the chance to give Poof a share of his magic, and H.P. actually ended up giving Poof some of his instead in order to keep him alive. Poof is haunted by that act to this day.

15) Longwood is a kleptomaniac.

Mostly, he tends to steal things from H.P.’s office as a way to challenge H.P.’s dominance, but he has been known to collect other things he finds interesting too.

My smirk disappeared when we returned to the dressing room. Keefe ran straight to me, whining about the way I'd so rudely forced him out of my pouch. Longwood sat in front of the trifold mirrors, head bowed, fiddling with something on his finger that looked suspiciously like a ring. When I came in, I saw his reflection tear it off and stuff it inside the pocket of his coat. He straightened his lapels as I came over.

"What are you hiding?" I asked, untucking my shirt so Keefe could scramble in.

"Nothing."

I held out my hand, fingers twitching. Longwood resisted for several seconds, until I snapped twice. In slow motion, he removed the ring and placed it in my outstretched palm. I brought it to my face, adjusting my glasses. It wasn't entirely a ring, in the sense that it didn't form a complete circle. It was more like half a ring, like it could balance on only the upper half of a finger. The body itself was black leather, and a tiny chip of citrine glittered in the center of the half-circle, so if it was broken, it had been broken perfectly even. It looked vaguely familiar, though I couldn't place it.

"This looks like a Zodii wedding band. Or a damaged one. Where did you find this?"

"Around."

"Right." I tapped my temple twice, then gave the ring back to him. "I've been avoiding you since you were born, and I always think of you as 'the one with the freckles', so I forgot that you're also a budding kleptomaniac."

Longwood looked at the ring, then looked up at me. "Yes," he said. "That is exactly why I have this. I've had it for years. I keep it with me because it makes me feel safe."

The Purple Robe glanced around the dressing room. "Did you take anything? There's nothing really loose here, but still, it would be incredibly disrespectful to steal from the Pink Castle."

"Technically, I don't steal things. I just want things that I find left where no one is paying attention to them and I pick them up without calling attention to myself." Longwood pointed at our original clothes, and specifically at his black and white scarf. "Those are mine. I got this out of my pocket, but I didn't touch the other stuff in here."

~ “Playing With the Big Kids”; Origin of the Pixies

16) Longwood is one of very few pixies that the Head Pixie doesn’t share the Santa Claus powers with during Gray Tuesday.

Longwood, Cosmo, and Wanda were all originally meant to appear in Prompt 124, “This Is a Box”. Below is a scene that didn’t make it into the final piece:

Chloe pressed her palm against her lips. “They exploded. All the pixies. All of them.”

“Wait,” Timmy managed between his coughs. He pointed through the rubble and rising dust. “There’s one left.”

There was indeed a single pixie, identical to all the others, picking his way among the heaps of paper mâché. Some had already partially reformed into thin, unmoving bodies around him.

“Right hands up like this,” Wanda ordered, curling her thumb in the center of her palm. She held the hand straight forward in front of her. “Fingers spread. He’ll see we mean no harm.”

Chloe noticed, too, that she held her wand in her left hand, its transmitting tip pointed down and behind her.

It was hard to tell when the pixie spotted them, because after all, they were pretty emotionless and blank-faced little guys. Maybe he’d known they were there all along. At first no one did anything, and just stared at one another across the sea of bodies. The pixie kept his hand inside his jacket, which had to be where he kept a wand of his own. His eyebrows were up, but his eyes were still hidden behind the shades, and she might not have been able to follow them from where she stood anyway. Chloe tried hard not to blink, but eventually she had to - double-blinked, even - and glanced to her right.

“If you truly come in peace, you may lower your hands,” the pixie said, floating towards them again. His wings buzzed, beating slow circles in the air as opposed to Cosmo and Wanda’s rapid flapping. “And if you don’t come in peace, then you will be lying, and being untrue to yourself and your fellows will disrupt your magic channeling abilities, and I will easily be able to overwhelm you. Oh, hey.” He lifted his shades and squinted as he came closer. “You’re the High Count and Countess’s counterparts.”

Wanda gestured towards herself with her wand, then included Cosmo with a swirl. “He’s Cosmo, and I’m Wanda. And we’re Timmy and Chloe’s fairy godparents.”

His eyes flickered down. The shades dropped back into place. “Hello, Turner.”

Timmy took half a step back, his arms tense by his sides. “Do I know you?”

“Probably not, but I certainly know you. That’s my job. My name is Mr. Longwood.” He extended a hand. They both shook, Timmy first, and Mr. Longwood clasped the backs of their knuckles both times before he released them. Chloe’s fingers still tingled after he let go. “I’m company Vice President and, at the moment, legally acting as Head Pixie ad litem while my boss recovers from the strain of today.”

“Gee.” Cosmo tapped his wand against his lips and glanced nervously in Wanda’s direction. “I sure hope no one expects me to be responsible for knowing what that means.”

Mr. Longwood did not react, which was actually sort of creepy. Chloe had been expecting a sigh. “Do not concern yourselves with my colleagues. We go through this routine every year, and they will all revert to their typical selves within twenty-four hours.”

Chloe hesitated. “Mr. Longwood, if you don’t mind me asking, why didn’t you go nutso like your friends?”

He arched his eyebrows. “When Santa Claus absorbs all the Fairy magic each year, it takes him nine months on average to recover from the strain. My boss, in the interest of avoiding the same fate, elects to divide the power among all of those who work beneath him. He always spares me for this precise reason- watching over Pixie World in case any nosy Fairies or ill-intentioned Anti-Fairies should come swooping in.”

“All by yourself?”

He shrugged without taking his hands from his pockets. “I have a girlfriend. I’m not quite alone here, either. The bank is still being guarded, so you can forget robbing it, if you had any plans to. A few of us would have difficulty maintaining any of that power, and Sanderson is watching over the Head Pixie himself.”

His words were flat. Resigned. And that was the worst part about them- how emotionless he sounded. Like someone had forced him not to care about anything even though really, really deep down, she knew that even pixies had feelings too. Each word he’d spoken sunk into Chloe’s soul like the barbs on a grappling hook. She placed her hand against her chest. “In that case, let me stay with you.”

Timmy snorted. “Maybe you will, but I’m going home. I’ve got presents to wish up wrapping for and a Fairy Reunion to attend first thing tomorrow morning. Not that I really care about being well-rested for it, but I’ll take any excuse to be anywhere but here. Wanda-”

Chloe grabbed his elbow. “Timmy, please stay. Look, he’s so alone.”

Somehow, Timmy managed to roll his eyes at her and soften them at the same time. He pulled his arm away. “All right. I guess I can stay for a little while.”

Mr. Longwood adjusted his shades. “I don’t think so. The cloudland atmosphere is thinner than what you are used to, and according to Tenderfir v. Redbrush, you’re required by law to return to Earth every several hours to ensure you don’t asphyxiate.”

“This goes beyond Da Rules,” Chloe insisted, taking his hand in hers. She gave his knuckles two quick pats. “This is about friendship and kindness.”

“You will literally die.”

17) Being a pacifist, Longwood finds himself unable to kill anyone- even when his life is at stake.

Which is one of his traits that H.P. can’t help but notice.

“I- I can’t put my mouth on yours, H.P.! You’re my dad!”

“Oh my smoof. It’s not a kiss, it’s murder. It’s drinking my lifeforce to extend yours. It’s nature. It’s instinct. Dangit, Longwood!” I slammed my fist into the ground. “You can’t even be a gyne right. You have no strengths of any sort. You would make a terrible Head Pixie.”

Longwood grabbed my cheeks. “Don’t say that! I’m a good pixie! My freckles don’t make me broken! Different is okay! I-I’m a real pixie too!”

~ “Gyne Time”; Origin of the Pixies

Of all the original characters I’ve created for my FOP ‘fics, Longwood is probably my favorite. He’s a real sweetheart who usually runs himself ragged looking after Pixies Inc. while H.P. and Sanderson are away. He’s an awkwardly tall dork who likes watching old movies with his selkie girlfriend and the password on his laptop is “0rang3 ju1c3”. Whether you guys like him or not, I hope this post helped you understand his character a little better.

Thank you all for supporting me over the last 2+ years! As much as I’ve enjoyed writing for this show, it would be a hollow victory if I felt like I was just flinging my work into an empty void. I deeply appreciate all the reviews, Asks, reblogs, favs, likes, comments, and shout-outs I’ve received.

Thanks again, and I hope you continue enjoying my writing for years to come!

[anonil88]

Needs a title

Chapter 1

Rated M, because it is a college story.

~so a heads up i am new to writing fan fiction, but not stories, also new to writing on an ipad so excuse my errors atm. This was an idea that was sparked by wayhaught but, i never intended on turning it into a fan fic of sorts. But here we are, there may be some terms you have to look up but, i can explain one thing. Sorority’s and fraternity’s in American universities have a big, like an older sibling, and littles that choose or are chosen to a big. Just a slight explanation, also this doesn’t have a title yet so suggestions are welcome. ~

Sitting at the desk of the security office she lost herself in her thoughts as the phone rang. Nicole was one of the officers on duty in the security office at Woodbridge Heights University. All of the other officers on duty were out doing rounds, unlocking doos, or something else. It was just her and student officer Owen Lonnie milling around the office waiting to har if anyone needed assistance or until their shifts were over.

The phone rang out breaking them both from the thoughts milling around in both of their heads. Lonnie picked up the line, “Campus security, Student officer Lonnie what can i help you with. Uh huh . Okay, i will dispatch an officer over to help with the lock. He hung up the phone and Nicole was already shrugging her jacket on. Lonnie filled her in on the situation, a locked shed on the football field containing some necessary equipment. She hopped into the dark green golf cart and made her way over to the football stadium. Her thoughts went to how grateful she was to have this job. She graduated with her bachelors and after four years of being a part of the Mountie security family they offered her a job. She figured while she was continuing her academy pursuits. Pulling into the storage area near the field she saw the group of athletes yanking on the padlock attached to the shed she skirted to a stop.

“Finally someone showed up,” stated a tattooed beef cake that she recognized as the recruited sophomore playing both lacrosse and football. He and his gaggle of friends some geared up and some barely chuckled at his remark. Nicole tried her best not to show the annoyance she felt on her face as she dug in her pocket for keys.

“Hi , Champ I’m sure coach Ricard would love to hear how you lost the storage keys....again.” she tried to keep her tone stoic as she opened the shed and heard the non-hardy players snickered and snided her into the shed. Moving out of the way she stepped back and looked back over at champ who was waiting for the others to pull out the pads for the sleds. Nicole decided she might as well make conversation with the kid, “So are you excited for the season.”

Champ sighed and looked over, “yea, but the pressure uh does it get any better?”

Nicole thought about the pressure to bring back another championship her senior year with the women’s basketball team. She also thought about the fact that Hardy and the team were coming off of last years shiny championship win,” no it does not”, she relented. Champ had grabbed the last of the gear and nodded toward Nicole as she pulled the shed shut. Following the team she made her way to the stands checking the time on her watch. While pulling off her jacket her eyes glazed over the field when she heard a loud yelp and a clamor of groans off to the side of her.

***

The cheer squad took advantage of the good weather and the fact that the football team’s practice was going to be more than slightly delayed due to a coach and equipment gone awol. The captain of the squad, Waverly Earp opted to her squad to practice some of their sideline routine including a less than clean torch stand and even worse arabesque. It never helped that a few of these flyers had no real interest in pre-stretching nor listening knowing they would have a chance to “inspect” the new players setting out gear. She knew that the only way to get some of their attention was to op in line with all of them, leaving he co captain Chrissy to watch from the side. With a count and a lunge waverly was lifted in the air one leg pointed.

She heard the quiet groan under her as some of the girls not being a base looked up at her and rolled their eyes. She thought about how hard she tried to get everyone on the squad to like her but there was one thing always disconnecting her and a few of the others. She wondered if it was the fact that she was in a rivaling sorority than the other or that they were envious of the many ups she had going for her at Woodbridge. Little did they or mostly anyone besides the admission committee knew of her circumstances at home. Her reluctance to tell anyone about the reason why she and her sister, Wy, had left their hometown or why she loved this campus the way she did was a loaded answer. It was part guilt, part fear or rejection, and maybe a bit of a wall. They didn’t know her history so she was free to create a new future or at least try to.

The sun slightly blinded her vision as she brought her leg down yet remaining in the air. Yelling down to the girls below she informed them of the proper procedures to the stunt she just performed. Chrissy and the cheer coach backing up her words in the distance. She tried her best to listen in on what the coach was stating to her and the rest of the squad, but her eyes noticed a flick of red hair making its way across the silver and black stands and then the faint outline of a tanned muscular bicep . So focused on the person that was drawing her attention in the stands she mindlessly signaled for dismount. The base crew were already bowing at her weight and the distraction of Waverly led to a crumpled mess of girls and a few bruises to Waverly’s arm. Some how in the all she had the fore thought to cover her head when coming down but , she was still a bit dazed as people were being pulled off of her and then her off of another girls body. The person holding her upright covered the sun that was blazing down on her. Regardless of this shadow she saw a bright light and her eyes followed despite the blurriness. Her ears registered a warm voice and then finally murmurs. The stars were wearing off and she felt less disoriented coming to the sight of her coach looking at the other girls and Chrissy staring at her along with a tall concerned red head. Waverly snapped out of whatever fog the fall had caused and stared straight at Chrissy. “I am fine but, can someone actually go to morning work out,” she yelled the last bit of her statement towards the girls next to her warranting a scoff or two. She knew she had some fault yet, needed to deflect a bit.

Chrissy laughed and roped her hand around Waverly’s shoulder,” stop before they mutiny on both of us.” The woman who was very obviously a security officer spoke into the walkie on her shoulder and smiled in both of the girls reaction. Waverly caught her eyes lingering a bit too long over the face of the officer and managed to laugh off th statement Chrissy had made. Chrissy chimed in noticing a slight change in the way Waverly’s eyes were grazing Nicole. “Okay then i think I’m going to take waverly to sit down then Nic....i mean Officer Haught,” Chrissy laughed off pulling Waverly by the arm.

***

Nicole rolled her eyes playfully and tapped Chrissy’s in the shoulder as the girl turned pulling her cute brunette friend with her. Nicole beamed at her little, “It’s fine Bunny i am still Nicole or Hops, outside of yaknow when other security is around.” She started walking back to the golf cart once she had checked that none of the other girls needed to be taken to the health center on campus. On the way back to the cart she waved at one of her friends who was now the defensive coach for the football team, who had now taken to the field practicing drill lines etc. Dolls stopped her before she completely walked passed him. “Officer hops saving the day one shed at a time or should i say one girl,” he chuckled lowly.

“Ha ha, now maybe if someone made sure that they arrived on time instead of taking some extra time with a certain bar tender, i could have stayed inside getting cabin fever,” she jeered toward the man who was the epitome of tall dark and handsome.

Dolls grimaced and shrugged, “what can i say i have a thing for a spitfire named Aphrodite. Which by the way i think that was her sister you helped out there.” Nicole rose her eyebrow prying for some more information. “The one that was in the air with the brown hair. I think that is her at least because, she is the head cheerleader from what Wynonna...” He groaned as the name of his secret fling slipped his lips and the smile on Nicole’s faced widened. “I am going to go back to work please do not mention this to Eliza or anyone else for that matter,” Xavier shook his head as he turned around dismissing any come back Nicole was sending his way.

All Nicole could do was pat her friend on the back and walk back to the forest green cart.

***

Pulling back into the parking lot of the security offices and jogging into through the door she checked the clock on the wall noticing that the student officers had rotated shifts. She had 20 minutes left on her shift and took the time to sit at her desk and begin filing out a short report on the shed situation. With the report handed in as well as, her keys she started to pack her bag and set her keys a fingers length away on her desk ready to joy what time she had left of the day to herself. Pulling out her phone to pass the remaining minutes she checked the group chat between her sorority siblings and her. Scrolling up a bit she noticed Chrissy recounting her actions to the rest of the chat and the responses of rabbit emojis and jokes about her saving the day including the name of a certain face that Nicole’s mind kept angering to. She texted the group wow you guys must have nothing new to talk about like recruitment week. The responses flooded and soon enough her nickname in the chat was now officer hops and her shift was over. Saying her goodbyes to the officers in the building and striding over to her car she contemplated sending a text that dolls had inspired. Her finger lingered over the send button before tapping it and sending it to the group chat, pulling out of the parking lot soon after.