#Nick you delightful trashy thing you

[talesfrommedinastation]

Sign #1,876 that Tech's a redneck?

Rednecks LOVE piles of crap that they're 'working on', ESPECIALLY if it's car or technology related. It's one step away from old ladies and their piles of knitting around the house but don't tell THEM that.

"Imma get this here microwave going again, yessiree, why buy new when you can just fix what you found in the dump? Turn it up son, I need some Florida-Georgia Line to get to work!"

And look at our boi here in them Georgia colors, Bulldog red on and ready for football.

[phonkscribes]

Hi! Would you be interested in writing dating headcanons about the L4D2 survivors? Thanks in advance<3 (P.S. I love your work)

Left 4 Dead 2 Survivor dating head-canons!

Hello anon, and I'd be delighted to and thank you for enjoying the work I put out! I don't have a clever quip to throw in this time so without further a-do, here are your head canons.

Nick

He's an asshole to everyone, but he's soft when it comes to you. Especially if you don't pick up on sarcasm like everyone else.

He'd never try to yell or raise his voice at you like he would with others too. Nick is patient and holds up on you when you start to lag behind

It's a surprising display of intimacy that has the others making eyes at him and looking smug. 'Didn't think you had it in ya, Nick'.

He smiles a little more, and tries to be romantic in spite of the setting.

It's the little things that make the world go 'round, and he's got a knack for doing them for you, intentionally or not.

Needed pills for something? He's got you covered, even if he thought he needed them more.

Instead of giving you your share of compliments and nick names, he'd point out your habits and say that they're cute and call you other names: 'I think it's really cute how you play with your hair when thinking about something' / 'Alright let's get out of here stinky'

Ellis

He is the sweetest guy.

He loves telling stories to you, and he always plays them up to try and make you laugh.

Ellis will take you sight seeing around Savannah, or try and take you out to a fancy date he's prepared(beer on the roof top)

He likes to show you off or brag that he has you as his S/O.

"Damn I'm so lucky to have you, y'know"

He will get sad if he's separated from you for too long, and hope that you're okay whenever you two get separated from each other for whatever reason.

He's a hugger, and will often reach his arms around to hug you from behind whenever he has the chance.

Says "I love you" a lot. Do not fight him on this because he'll just keep saying he loves you more or hit you with a "nuh-uh"

Nick gets tired of this whenever it happens.

Rochelle

She's the boss when it comes down to it, stubborn as a mule but if you're really against something she'll hear you out on it.

If Nick says some shit to you, she'll whip something witty right back at him that makes him either scoff or shuts him right up.

Rochelle beams at you whenever you save her from one of the special infected, hyping you up with that gorgeous smile of hers.

"Yep, that's mine right there", as you help her up.

She likes to bring you little gifts here and there, especially when you need them without ever asking for them out loud.

"Here, I thought you might need this", and she presses it into your hands with a small smile as she looks up into your eyes

She is likes to hold your hand as you two travel, or have your pinkies intertwined when you need to break away for a fight

She likes to press her back against yours, feeling safe that you've got hers when it comes down to it.

Rochelle thinks you're a lot cooler than you may let yourself believe

Coach

He's right behind you every step of the way, and will lift you up anyway he can. Except for literally, he might hurt his back if he tries to do that.

The two of you eat good, even for the apocalypse, he won't let you eat nothing trashy but also nothing that will put either one of you in a theoretical ER.

Will pull you off to the side if he sees that you're feeling down or are bummed out about something.

He's real good at talking with you about things

Absolutely loves giving you little kisses on the top of your head or your hands, anywhere he can really

His love language is words of affirmation(I am so sure on this)

Likes to praise you, congratulating you on good shots and a bit more lenient with you when you make bad ones.

Coach is endearing though, never the "ooh now personally I wouldn't have done that" kinda comments.

He likes to guide your hands when he steps behind you, "try it like this"

He likes to hold you close in his arms, and letting you listen to his heart as you two rest up.

"Everything's gon' be alright baby, I've got ya"

[kineticallyanywhere]

So. Dndads. Best dad? Best ‘saving the kids’ arc? Best anchor arc? Worst arc? Who had the most development?

oh man so there's "best" and there's "favorite" which feel like two different things. Both are gonna be subjective, but "best" refers to what's fitting the definition of "good" and "favorite" is what I will take for all it's trashy corners because it hits all the right trope buttons for me

Best Dad: Darryl. Henry's a close second, but his baggage holds him back. Darryl is affirming to his kid, they have a relationship based on both love and respect, they're actively adjusting boundaries and learning to listen to each other. Does it help that Darryl came from the most stable home and has the least complex relationship with his kid? Absolutely! But Darryl was even able to dad the twins. That's a feat all on it's own. Favorite Dad: Henry. He's just... so much???? And just always trying to be a good person??? He likes hugs and complimenting his friends??? You all most know I'm the biggest sucker for that. Sure every other dad fact is a crime against mankind and an embarrassment to our species but he's only 75% (give or take) human anyway! ...his cool backstory is like 1000 bonus points. [Slaps hood of Henry] you could fit so many AUs in this

Best Kid-Saver Arc: Tower of Terry. It's got the hahas. It's got the tears. It's got subverting Anthony's plans and then picking on him relentlessly about it. This arc contains multitudes Favorite Kid-Saver Arc: Lord of Chaos. Cause its freaking hysterical. Don't get me wrong, Tower of Terry and Forknights are close in the running. You guys KNOW I ADORE Tower of Terry. Obsessed over it for two months. But Lord of Chaos is what really hooked me in the first place and I could listen to that thing on repeat its just so funny

Best Anchor Arc: Football. In terms of having a structure, being hysterical, having a clear and developing emotional arc, and a full sense of closure at the end? Football, hands down. Favorite Anchor Arc: Oakvale. You may be sensing a pattern here, but this one was actually really hard. There are parts of this arc that drag and I know a lot of my enjoyment of it just comes from the Drama and the Lore and the Beary-Warning-Henry-30-Episodes-Ago-That-If-He's-Not-Careful-They-Could-End-Reality-Hope-You-Don't-Forget-About-That-Subplot-For-The-Mental-Health-Metaphor-It's-A-Spectacular-Metaphor-But-He's-Really-Not-Lying-This-Time

Worst Arc: This is really really really hard. Also the most subjective on all fronts so I'm just combining "worst" and "least favorite". Because every arc has something going for it. And I hate that I'm sitting here trying to decide between Battle Axe of Hatred and Foster Dad (which I guess is what I'm calling Jodie's arc, after the trial ends), because they're both "Glenn arcs". Glenn Close had development (fight me*) and both of these arcs got something done, but... Y'know, I think I gotta go with BattleAxe. This doesn't mean I think it's bad! It did what it was supposed to do, it established Glenn and Nick's relationship dynamic! Glenn didn't have to grow or change in his first arc, Henry certainly didn't! Ron was ahead of the curve! Battleaxe, I think, suffered by the same moment that made it iconic, and I wouldn't change it for the world, it's just not an arc I revisit much. Foster Dad was incredibly long and kinda all over the place, but every individual episode was a riot and Jimmy was a delight. Every other arc is helped by either having an off-the-wall premise or something really emotionally potent. BattleAxe is honestly pretty straight forward DnD. And it gave us Paeden I would trade it for nothing every arc in this show is fantastic.

Most Development: Darryl Everybody developed (fight me*, episode 1 Glenn would not say any of the things episode 68 pt2 Glenn said), but two of the hardest things for a person to do are acknowledge their own insecurities, take on perspectives outside of their own, and ask for help. And Darryl did all of those things. Every single one of these dads has come so far. None of them are who they were when the show started and I'm so proud. I land the pin on Darryl specifically because I feel like Henry and Glenn still have some work to do and Ron kinda had a head start. Not to say we aren't all improving and changing constantly, but in terms of moving from one major stage to the other, Darryl is much more polished off.

tl;dr yes

*but like you don't have to. If you don't agree that's fine

[lovecolibri]

Thoughts on the big leap show?

Oh Nonnie, it is garbage. Trash. Ridiculous.

I don't know what it is, and I kind of hate that I love it so much? But I legit enjoy it so much! My mom wanted to see it so I left it on after the premier of 911 (which is the only show I'm currently watching on live tv so that's the only reason this show is even on my radar) and then I got sucked in. It's exactly as trashy and ridiculous as I thought it would be, BUT it subverts my expectations just enough in just the right places that I can't stop watching it.

I love that the producer Nick is an absolute, unmitigated asshole and is using all of these people and yet, he has these moments of sparkling clarity where he does the kind thing. He's not a good man. But he's not a caricature of a monster either. Same with Monica the choreographer. We see different sides of her, why she's like that, but we also see her recognizing talent when she sees Gabby's choreography and working with Justin to hone his abilities. But also, I love the actress and she threw a chair into a table in a fit of rage which will never not be delightful.

I love that, while the mom Julia and the stripper Raven her husband was frequenting have the dramatic scenes you would expect, they also bond a little over the fact that HE was the issue, not them. And their scene together a couple weeks ago talking about their dance history was beautiful. They aren't best friends and they aren't glossing over their issues, but there is an understanding there that I did not expect to see.

I adore Gabby. She is bright, and funny, and absolutely stunning, especially when she's dancing, and her and NFL star Reggie have me ���😍😍 Same with the star-crossed lovers Mike the former factory worker and Paula the woman who was responsible for him loosing his job. They have such great chemistry and I always enjoy seeing Piper Perabo.

And I cannot help but love Justin and Simon! Their opening dance that built into their kiss this past episode was just *chef's kiss*. I also love that Simon knows his mom is a monster and his sister Brittney isn't far behind but when mom shows up, he gets drawn back in because that is such a real thing, especially for kids with emotionally/verbally abusive parents. And then seeing what Brittney could be like if she wasn't trying to be the cutthroat person her mom wants her to be (which is just code for isolated, so she has to rely on mom) made her actions so much more heartbreaking.

I just....I don't want to like this show. I don't. But I DO like it, and I do enjoy it and I am excited to see where the story goes!

[the-trashy-phoenix]

Supernatural season 5 review (part 2)

Link to part 1:

Irene and I had finished season 5 and, as I already imagined, I loved it. I'm not quite sure if I like it more than the previous one, I think they're kind of in the same level of greatness.

It starts with Lucifer rising again and Sam and Dean being miraculously saved. They immediately meet Chuck to know what happened with the angels and the prophet tells them Castiel has been killed by them. With Lucifer out of the cage Zacharia (who fortunately gets killed at the end by the older Winchester) wants Dean to be Michael's vessel, since he's the only one who can beat the devil: the only problem is that Dean has to say "yes" to Michael. He obviously doesn't want to, so the angels trying to convince him will be a recurrent thing throughout the season. Dean tries to not change his opinion, because becoming Micheal's vessel would mean the two archangels would fight and with their power they would destroy half the planet, but the more time passes the more Dean's hopes vanish, and towards the end he decides to accept Zacharia's proposal. At the last moment, however, to Sam, Castiel and Bobby's relief and delight, he opposes it and Adam, brought back to life only to replace his brother, accepts to be Michael's vessel. This whole mess will eventually end with Lucifer (in Sam's vessel) back in the cage, along with Michael (in Adam's), Castiel miraculously brought back (again, after returning at the beginning of the season) and a desperate Dean trying to keep living a life with Lisa and Ben after losing his brother and promising him to try a new life without hunts.

The main focus of the season is obviously trying to defeat Lucifer, who we meet in the first episode. It is already an interesting character, because he feels misunderstood by God and believes he didn't deserve what he got from his father. It is almost impossible not to empathise at least a little bit with him. He also hides his evil side pretty well at first, making him seem almost like the actual good guy of the situation and the victim of a cruel God. I like the fact that he shows up to the people he wants to convince as their loved one (like he did with Nick when he showed as his wife). He tries to convince Sam to be his vessel (because he's actually the only one who would truly contain him) showing up as Jessica. Sam obviously doesn't want to help Lucifer with the Apocalypse, although both Sam and us don't even really know what his true intentions are. We quickly learn that he obviously, as he hated humanity before, still does it now, so his plan is actually mostly a revenge. He really seems like the final big bad guy, probably because he was supposed to be, and because every other villain ultimately leads to him. I believe he is my favourite one: he is a way more rounded character than the others, having his own motivations (that go beyond wanting to do bad and win over the others). As much as he's wrong for doing what he's doing, at least he got his reasons. He is the first angel who has rebelled against God and he was punished for it, but he's not the only one who did it. At the end of the last season we saw Castiel, persuaded by Dean, rebelling against the angels and their plan to bring Lucifer back. So what makes the difference between them? I think it is the reasons and the intentions behind their actions: Lucifer rebelled because he hated humans and now wants to end them, Castiel rebelled because he loves humanity and wants to defend it. So there's no surprise when Castiel refuses to join Lucifer when he tries to get his brother to come to the dark side in episode 05x10.

Lucifer is not the only new villain, we also meet two demons with opposite purposes: Meg and Crowley. Meg isn't actually new, as we know her since season one, but she has a new body. Her character doesn't change much in season five, she's still a loyal servant, in this case to Lucifer, but we'll see what I will think about her in the next seasons, as I know, as much as I can remember, she will improve. Crowley on the other hand is a lone wolf and wants Lucifer dead as much as the two protagonists want him. I have loved Crowley since the first episode I saw him (05x10) for several reasons. I adore his personality: he's funny and sassy and the perfect villain who's not really a villain (because at the end of the day neither Dean or Sam want him dead, and neither he wants them to be dead as well). I like the fact that he just minds his own business: he doesn't want to start apocalypses or whatsoever, he just wants to keep living, and he knows being against Lucifer is an immediate suicide for a demon, so he helps the Winchesters to kill him. He gives them the Colt at first, believing they could kill him with that, and so they attempt to, ending up with Jo and Ellen dead and the certainty that the Colt couldn't kill the devil. On a side note, I liked seeing Jo and Ellen back, but I hated watching them dying, as much as I loved the episode thanks to its intensity and melancholy (especially in the scenes between Jo and Ellen and between Jo and Dean, although I'm not totally convinced that he should have kissed her, even if I think he did it mainly to make her understand how much he cared about her, rather than for romantic love). I don't appreciate Supernatural not having a female main character who stays alongside the boys for more than a few seasons. I don't expect a woman to become a main character like Castiel but it would have been nice to see a woman appear at least as much as Bobby. This side of Supernatural shows how far behind it is in some ways and that it needed to improve on many aspects (such as veiled, but not too much, misogyny). Returning to Crowley, the demon proves to be essential as thanks to him Sam and Dean understand how to stop Lucifer: not killing him but sending him back where he came from. To do this they need to open a portal that leads Lucifer into his cage, and the portal can only be opened by the rings of the four knights of the apocalypse. They are characters brought to earth, thanks to Lucifer, that Sam and Dean have the pleasure of meeting (and defeating most of the time). The most interesting character is certainly Death, with whom Dean talks (episode 05x21) and who has no intention of fighting the brothers, indeed he voluntarily gives them his ring. The only problem left is to find Lucifer and to push him into the cage. Sam, who has been thinking for days that he has to accept Lucifer's request in order to try to jump into the portal, manages to convince Dean, who obviously would never want Sam to be locked in Lucifer's cage with the devil himself inside him.

Sam and Dean, mainly because of everything that happened last season, have to try to rebuild their now inevitably changed relationship (whose antagonism is exasperated in the parallelism of the two protagonists with the archangels Lucifer, the rebellious son, and Michael, the devoted son). Dean, as much as he doesn't want to, can't keep pretending everything's okay between them and thinks it's best to take different paths. The two brothers remain divided until Dean realizes they can win against the angels and Lucifer only if they are together. From then on their relationship strengthens more and more, until Dean, I think for the first time, decides to completely trust Sam, reject Zacharia's proposal and find another way to defeat Lucifer (05x18). The final step forward is surely Dean accepting Sam's idea of becoming Lucifer's vessel, while knowing what it entails. The difference in their relationship between the end of this season and last season lies in several factors: Sam opens up to Dean and tries to be as honest as possible, while Dean accepts that his brother is now grown up and must make his choices, even if these involve his sacrifice to save humanity. Their relationship ends with one last touching scene in which Dean manages to reach Sam, despite being controlled by Lucifer, and give him enough strength to jump into the portal that will lead him to the cage. I think this season potrais their relationship in a way never seen before, with a rollercoaster of emotions that shows how much they care about each other and how much they have grown in the recent years.

There's another relationship that I'd like to talk about and that I think has evolved over the course of the season, Dean and Castiel's. The two certainly make giant strides towards the end of season four, when Castiel decides to rebel and side with Dean, but they are not yet in the best of relationships. Dean finally seems to trust Castiel, but is still not entirely comfortable with him and his personality ("Cas, we've talked about the personal space", 05x03), while Castiel, after being brought back to life, is convinced, in the early episodes of the season, that he can find God, which Dean is very skeptical of. The thing that may come as a surprise, however, is that Dean supports Castiel and comforts him when the angel seems to have lost hope. I don't think it's really shocking, considering Dean sees himself in Castiel, who seems to be just a confused son looking for an absent father, which Dean is by now an expert of (and the funny thing is that in the emotional episode 05x13, where Sam and Dean go back in time and meet their parents, John, once he knows the lives of the two brothers, he wonders how a father can behave that way with their children, obviously not being aware of the hard truth). When, in episode 05x16, in which Dean and Sam die and go to heaven (which I think is quite original, divided into personal heavens formed by memories of each of the dead people), they discover that God is somewhere, but that he has no intention of intervening in any way, giving relatively little importance to humanity and angels, Castiel is completely destroyed by the news and copes getting drunk (another parallelism with Dean I would say) and in this episode (05x17), confident they can't get help from God, Dean calls the formed trio "team free will" (emphasizing the fact that they are now free to make their own choices). I feel like Dean and Cas start to bond especially when Dean is alone (so in episode 05x03) and he understands Castiel's value in episode 05x04, when Zacharia sends him to a future where he has not accepted to be Michael's vessel, Sam is Lucifer vessel and the world is infected by the Croatoan virus. Dean meets his future self (a way worse and more desperate version of him) who trusts past Dean after he tells his future self an anecdote (that he never revealed to anyone) about wearing pink panties and liking it. I'll admit I completely forgot about that particular (probably because I was 15 when I first watched it and this information seemed extremely irrelevant to me) and I'm still amazed that such a scene really exists. Anyway Dean realizes that, despite everything that has been going on and the way he's become, Castiel has never abandoned him. He also understands, noticing how much the future Castiel has changed and how hopeless he gets, he should appreciate his Castiel more (and that is something Castiel will eventually tell him directly too in episode 05x18, in which after Dean decides to agree to Michael Castiel beats him up telling him he rebelled for him and so he shouldn't repay him like that).

Chuck compares in episode too, showing he's still on Dean's side as well. I honestly quite like him in this season: he's awkward, confused and out of place most of the time, but I think that's what makes it likeable, at least for me. We see more of him in episode 05x09, where there's a Supernatural convention and Sam and Dean have to deal with both their fans (without them knowing who they really are) and a case, and are forced to work with a couple of fans who fortunately save everyone. At the end of the episode Dean discovers that the two fans, both male, are a real couple (making it the first homosexual couple in the series). I don't quite know how to interpret this moment (which writers probably didn't even give too much thought to), but the fact that in the next scene we see Dean thinking next to the car with a little smile makes me believe that that the step forward to acceptance was not only made by the series.

There's another character who's not totally new but seems to be at the same time: Gabriel. We have known him since season two by the name of "Trickster", but thanks to Castiel we find out, along with the brothers, that he was an archangel all along (who gave us some of the funniest episodes, and especially Dean thirsting over Dr. Sexy in episode 05x08). They ask him to join their side, but quickly understand he doesn't want to be on anyone's side. He fortunately changes his mind on episode 05x19 and sides with Sam and Dean, only to be killed by Lucifer at the end of the episode. Gabriel is my favourite angel besides Castiel, for obvious reasons, so I was very happy he decided to risk it all and go against his brother to be on the Winchesters' squad.

To conclude, as much as I think there are some parts of the season they could have done better (for example the scene with Lucifer and Michael in the last episode), I believe this is one of the best seasons of the show, so we'll see if after rewatching the other ten seasons I will have the same opinion.

- Carly 💚

[wolfpawn]

I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 138

Chapter Summary -   Danielle and Tom barely make it in the door home before they enjoy their night even more, but the next morning, it is not a hangover that has Danielle feeling queasy.

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long.  This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

Copyright for the photo is the owners, not mine. All image rights belong to their owners

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @jessibelle-nerdy-mum @nonsensicalobsessions @damalseer @hiddlesbitch1 @winterisakiller @fairlightswiftly @salempoe @wolfsmom1

Tom barely heard the door of the house close before he pushed Danielle against it, kissing her hungrily. ‘You fucking tease.’

‘What’s the matter? You seem a little frustrated.’ She grinned wickedly. He began to kiss her again, his hand sliding up her leg before pushing her skirt out of the way. ��What, here?’

‘Can’t wait.’ Tom moaned, pushing her up so that she was off the ground and was caught between him and the door, lifting her skirt higher again and pulling down her underwear. At the same time, she was fighting with his suit. Barely getting his boxers out of the way, he pushed into her, knowing she was wet from the playing and teasing she had done in the taxi home. She gasped as he bottomed out in her pinning her hands over her head with one hand while the other held her thigh up. Danielle found purchase on the radiator cover that was inside the hallway next to the door using that to alleviate some of her weight from Tom as he concentrated in thrusting his hips, kissing her passionately as he did so. ‘So beautiful.’

‘Fuck, Tom.’ Danielle moaned as he moved. ‘Fuck.’ He moved faster and faster until the door knocker began to rap against the door on the other side. ‘Tom, too loud, neighbours.’

‘Fuck em.’ He swore, too busy enjoying the sensation of Danielle’s body against his.

‘Can’t, I’m fucking you.’

‘I think you will find that it’s the other way around, Darling.’ Tom chuckled as he continued what he was doing. When the door knocker began to become louder, he swore again before pulling them away from the door and to the wall over next to the radiator, giving Danielle better purchase and continued his previous rhythm, his forehead against hers and his mouth open as he gasped and groaned in the pleasure, his hand once more pinning hers above them. ‘I want to see how long this takes.’ He grinned as he continued to move. ‘God, you feel so good.’

Danielle simply concentrated on not allowing her leg slip from its place of purchase as well as focusing on the incredible pleasure Tom was having her experience. She loved teasing him all evening, knowing that the few whiskeys he had were causing him to become a tad aroused and the manner in which he was eyeing her chest making it very clear. She had thought they would make it through the hallway of their home before he would want to ravish her, but as he continued to slap his hips against her, trying to get as much of himself into her as possible, he created the most incredible pleasure for her. Tom shifted slightly to lift her more as his grip was slipping, in doing so, he forced the angle of his thrusts to alter and begin to cause him to hit against every area, inside and out of Danielle’s body that gave her pleasure.

The sounds she made told Tom everything he needed to know, and to his relief, he was elated to hear she was close to her own orgasm as he was nearing his, so ignoring the pain in his hand from holding a large portion of her weight at such an obscure angle and continued what he was doing so to give her the pleasure he knew she yearned for. On hearing her gasps become harsher and more frequent, as well as the occasional moan, he knew she was reaching her peak, so he pressed his lips to hers and concentrated his efforts until he felt her fight against the hand that was holding hers above their heads and felt her fist clench as her body became overcome with pleasure. She moaned loudly as it all became too much and she fell over the edge of her orgasm. Tom cherished the feeling of her body falling apart around him before allowing himself fall over also; brushing his nose up her face alongside her own, his mouth before he clenched his teeth and heard himself groan her name as his hand fell from holding hers and helped him carry her weight as his legs felt unsteady at his orgasm. Lowering Danielle gently to the ground, he slowly pulled out of her. ‘Thank you.’

‘What for, you did all the work, not me.’

‘For today, thank you.’ He smiled. ‘I...I cannot tell you how much it meant to me to have you by my side.’

‘It was different and terrifying.’ She saw the concern on his face. ‘But I am glad I was there for you.’

‘So, more in the future?’

‘Yes.’ She nodded with a smile. ‘If you want me there, then yes.’

Elated, he kissed her with even more passion than before. ‘Do you think Luke is mad?’

Danielle giggled. ‘We controlled ourselves, barely. If he had been in the taxi home with us, however…’

‘I cannot help it, not with you looking as you do. So beautiful.’ He kissed her again.

Danielle’s hands cupped his face, going through his bristly facial hair that had, for now, become a constant feature on his face, and with the longer hair, she had to admit, she adored it. Tom was elated by her reaction, noting how she bit her lip often when looking at him or gave other small indicators as to loving his appearance. ‘Well, I don’t think I will be too welcome again if this will be a constant feature, poor Luke will have kittens when we finally go too far.’

‘Oh, a “when”?’ Tom grinned. ‘You have me intrigued now. What do you envision, a romp in a coat closet?’

‘Well, we did just fuck inside the front door.’

‘I regret nothing.’ He kissed her hand. ‘We do need bed though.’

‘Most definitely.’ Danielle agreed, rushing up the stairs.

‘Elle?’

‘I am not staining anything with your bodily fluids.’ She called back.

‘Fair enough.’ He acknowledged, followed her up, not enjoying the feel of his now damp boxers that he had pulled back up to prevent the same issue.

*

‘Morning, Darling.’ Danielle turned around to see Tom lying down in the bed next to her.

‘Hey. What time is it?’

‘Half nine.’

‘A sleep in.’

‘Yes.’ Tom pulled her to him and kissed her.

‘Again?’

‘If you’re up for it.’ He grinned cheekily.

‘Insatiable.’ She chuckled, giving him a kiss before going under the covers and kissing her way down his body while he bit his lower lip and moaned as she specifically chose areas of his body she knew tortured him in the most pleasurable way.

*

‘Well, what are the reviews?’

Tom looked up from his phone to see Danielle patting her hair dry. ‘Good.’

‘Yeah?’ Her smile was one of genuine delight.

‘You seem somewhat surprised.’

‘Well, I like it but I am not a critic, they influence cinema-goers to come and see it.’ She pointed out. ‘Who is saying what?’

‘“Early Man is an utterly silly feature from Nick Park and Aardman Animations that manages to be fresh and delightful.” That is the New York Times.’ Tom read. ‘“A welcome return to a form of stop-motion that takes pride in the technique's inevitable imperfections (such as thumbprints in the modelling clay), while putting extra care into the underlying script.” That is Variety.’ He added. ‘Then there is the Telegraph “Watch Early Man, the new film from Aardman Animations, and you’ll understand. Mere words can’t do the sequence justice”.’ He finished.

‘Brilliant.’ Danielle smiled. ‘And the negative?’

‘Only that it is a safe script, predictable, the usual sorts of things.’

‘So no really bad reviews?’

‘No, it seems to be something of a three to four-star rating all around.’

‘Woohoo, go you and your ridiculous accent, which, I have to say, I am still laughing at.’ Danielle giggled.

Tom chuckled as he rose to his feet and walked over to her. ‘It was incredibly fun.’

‘What had you looking at reviews anyway?’

He wrapped his arms around her. ‘Luke sent me a message, saying congratulations on the movie being reviewed well by the papers, so he sent me a few links and also...is the Irish Independent any good?’

‘It’s gotten a bit trashy over the past few years, more about gossip and tabloid stuff than I can remember, why?’ Danielle asked, not sure why he would ask about that paper.

‘You’re front page on it.’

‘What?’ Danielle’s voice went up two octaves as she spoke.

‘Well, it would be more accurate to say we are but you are their focus.’

‘Why?’

‘They decided that you were worth talking about.’

‘What sort of slow week is Ireland having if I am news, much less front page. What are they even saying?’

‘Well, the picture is us at the premiere and the caption is…’ He got the picture up on the screen which Danielle immediately inspected. It was to the right-hand side of the page, taking up a notable size of it in Danielle’s opinion. “Connemara born Danielle Hughes premieres alongside British actor boyfriend Tom Hiddleston at Early man premiere, see page six.” written underneath. ‘We are also in the Daily Mail but only page eight, and you are the focus of a lot of that too.’

‘This feels weird.’ Danielle commented. ‘What did they say?’

‘Well, I am not sure of the Daily Mail, I think Luke got about four lines in and had to get stronger coffee, you know how hard it is to even attempt to read something in that. And the Irish Independent is really focusing on your success and how I am just one of the things you achieved in recent times, your rise through Safeguard and your sterling career as a paramedic, your success in triathlon, it’s all they wrote about really.’ He seemed proud of her for that. ‘It also commented on your fashion, your practicality, they are really pushing you as a role model for women.’

‘That is just odd.’ Danielle was unsure how to feel about it all. ‘It can’t all be good.’

‘Well, there are some references to the album and “The Heeler” but nothing is being taken as a negative about you, if anything, they seem to maintain that you are more formidable than others as you are from a small family vet practise on the West Coast of Ireland and not the daughter of some wealthy finance...what did her father do again, something that made money.’ Tom dismissed.

‘I wasn’t exactly poor and I am not exactly rich now.’ Danielle pointed out.

‘But you are a success, a businesswoman, a formidable mind. I am being noted as needing a strong female in my life from it and I may be inclined to agree.’ Tom smiled. Seeing her uncertainty, he pulled her to him. ‘Are you okay?’

‘Yeah.’ She dismissed. ‘I mean, for one thing, I am not near Bernadette today, she would be an utter dose, so that’s not a bad thing.’

Tom could not stop himself from laughing as he thought of Danielle’s insufferable aunt.

[minaminokyoko]

Favourite avengers movies scenes?

How on earth do you expect me to ever narrow down enough to not list the entire trilogy in general? Holy hell. I am a big fat Marvel fangirl and I could write a fucking dissertation on scenes complete with charts and graphs. For the sake of argument, let me see if I can at the very least just highlight the tippy top favorite moments from the first three Avengers films. Keep in mind, I fucking love all three of them to death and could rave about them for days at a time.

The Avengers

-Loki’s confrontation with Nick Fury. This scene sets the tone for the rest of the film so fucking well, man. It’s just brilliantly done to see that whatever humanity that we saw in Loki in Thor has pretty much flown out the window and he’s here to wreak havoc and start a war, and he doesn’t care how many people he destroys in the process. I also like that it shows the vast gap in power and experience between the SHIELD agents and an Asgardian. Loki all but flattens everyone in a matter of seconds. Seeing him among other Asgardians can kind of make you forget he’s literally a thousand year old god and is tough as nails. He’s also low down and ruthless and that’s the kind of thing that is scary as hell when you realize that’s what they’re all up against.

-Nat’s “interrogation” with the Russians. I actually love every single Avenger’s introduction scene, but this one is so delightful in that Nat shows us just why she is an Avenger even though she has no enhanced abilities: deception, manipulation, and just being an incredibly agile combat expert. I am most delighted with her scene because before Avengers, I had no regard for Nat at all and thought she was just fanservice, but here, she completely proved her worth as a character and to the team, and I got on board as a fan of her just from her opening scene wiping the floor with these idiot Russian dudes.

-Tony and Bruce getting to know each other in the lab. From a character standpoint, this is an outstanding scene. Tony is trying to draw Bruce out of his shell, and the sympathy and empathy he has for him is so palpable that it’s why we all dubbed them the Science Bros and why it’s one of the best friendships in the Avengers. Tony is so awesome for joking with Bruce and treating him like a normal person and reminding him that there is at least one person aboard that helicarrier who doesn’t see him as some terrifying monster and knows just from reading up on him that he’s not a bad person. It’s so charming and wonderful.

-Stuttgart. Man. Man, oh man, this is a well done scene. The build up to Loki’s horrifying actions is so great and so is this freaking diva’s grandstanding once he demands the poor, confused Germans kneel before him. It’s fascinating to me because Loki has an almost childlike need for attention, as if his frustrations with his failure to take over Asgard as king has manifested itself into this very basic need to be acknowledged as being a powerful threat. Loki could kill an average human being with a flick of his wrist. His comparison of “an ant has no quarrel with a boot” while cruel is accurate, but here’s the thing, Loki: if you fuck with enough fucking ants, you can get your ass into a lot of trouble, and we’re fireants, not sugar ants, buddy. And ants who band together get shit done. The old man who stood up to him, in my book, is a fucking hero all on his own and I think it’s one of the most well crafted pieces of dialogue in the entire MCU. “There are no men like me.” “There are always men like you.” Oh, standing ovation for that piece of dialogue. Give it an Oscar. Then Cap swinging in to kick ass and Tony swooping in beside him with an equally over the top entrance to Loki’s was the icing on the fucking cake.

-Thor retrieving Loki. Hnnnnnnngh, okay, so here’s the thing: I fucking love Thor and Loki’s relationship even before Ragnarok came out and upgraded it. Thor is and always has been since his first movie a man with very deep emotions who loves and loves deeply with all his heart, and his confrontation with Loki just wounds me so much. How Thor throws Loki to the ground and yet yanks him to his feet and just holds him there, his hand on his face, looking so torn between agony and relief that his brother is alive. “I thought you dead.” “Did you mourn?” Fuck me, this scene is absolutely brutal to my feels. Thor and Loki’s debate was nothing short of excellent as Thor tries to bring Loki around, and the thing is, he means it. He means every fucking word, that he would take the Tesseract and bring his brother home, and he doesn’t care about facing the music, he just wants his goddamn brother back even after all Loki has done so far in the story. Y’all better stop sleeping on Thor, man. His heart is by far the best thing about him, forget all the delicious muscles and that perfect teddy bear smile. Thor has miles and miles of heart, and that’s why I love this scene so much. 

-Nat tricking Loki into revealing his plan. This scene is so good I based an entire goddamn fanfic around its premise. Dude. Nat fucking Romanov, y’all. I love how this scene is staged and executed. I love Loki starting out almost gentle and conversational, as if for once he’s going to just be an actual person and not a monster, and then he slips back into that nasty egotistical megalomaniac when he thinks he has one over on Nat. And then Nat fucking schools him. It’s why I have a personal headcanon that he developed a hatecrush on her after she, a mere mortal, tricked the goddamn God of Mischief. It solidified Nat as one of my favorite female heroes forever. I loved seeing her use that feminine “weakness” to let him run his mouth. I also love that his cruel words did in fact affect her and motivated her even more to both save Clint and to go to war with Loki at the end.

-The whole ass helicarrier attack sequence. I mean, I don’t even need to go into detail. You already know. 

-Tony confronting Loki. This is the scene that assured us that what followed would be one of the greatest fight sequences in cinematic history. I pretty much have most of Tony’s dialogue memorized because it had such an effective impact on me from a storytelling standpoint. Tony standing up to Loki as a mortal man with no suit, candidly threatening him with barely suppressed rage that Loki murdered Coulson, a comrade, in cold blood, is downright amazing.

-The battle of New York. Boom. Again, no words necessary. Perfect fucking sequence from start to finish.

-Thor trying one last damn time to bring Loki around. Oh, my heart. My poor fucking heart. Thor really loves his brother and he would do anything to have him back. Is it naive? Yes. But it’s also a beautiful statement of what family truly means to Thor and it breaks my heart. The fact that a tear slides down Loki’s face when he stabs Thor and mutters, “Sentiment” is so not cool. As much as Loki pretends to be the Big Bad Wolf, there is something still young and human inside of him even though he pretends it isn’t there. All my creys.

-Hulk trouncing Loki. I went and saw The Avengers three times in theaters, and two out of the three times, everyone cheered so loud I didn’t hear the Hulk say “puny god” over all the noise. It was that satisfying a scene.

Age of Ultron

-The entire beginning sequence. Fucking loved it. What masterful ass-kicking and showcasing of the team dynamic. It made me want a longer lead in to how they all got reunited because it was so enjoyable. “Language!” Oh, Cap.

-Jarvis and Ultron’s first scene together. Dude. James fuckin’ Spader, man. I never knew I could be so intimidated by a man’s voice. It was so unsettling for so many reasons, the resentment, irrationality, and anger from his unusual birth and creation. It was all the more frightening when he turned on Jarvis, and at the time, we didn’t know he hadn’t killed our beloved butler. 

-Picking up Mjolnir. This scene needs no elaboration. It’s just perfection. Even people who complain about Age of Ultron admit this scene is just flawless.

-The team confronting Tony over creating Ultron. Cap’s line, which we now know goes even further after the events of Infinity War, just make me want to die. “We’ll lose.” “Then we’ll do that together, too.” Tony’s face, realizing that Cap doesn’t care that he fucked up–he cares that Tony couldn’t trust the team enough to let them in on what he was dealing with–is soul-crushing. Tony realizes he was wrong to assume instead of being honest with them. 

-The confrontation in Wakanda. Everything about it was badass and it hits you right where you live seeing the Avengers having to face their biggest regrets and most painful moments of their pasts. Especially Steve’s. The image of him and Peggy finally getting their dance was so not okay. Special props to Tony in the Hulkbuster armor. That was one hell of a fucking brawl.

-The Sokovia final battle. There are just so many awesome points in the final battle sequence, man. Everyone is out there just kicking ass and doing what they do best. Special props to Hawkeye getting through to Wanda, and Hawkeye’s “nobody would know…nobody” moment with Pietro. 

Infinity War

Disclaimer: I have no idea how to isolate moments in a movie that is by far one of the most well written comic book movies since The Dark Knight, but I guess since you asked, I have to try anyway. Hoo boy. Strap in. 

-Loki’s death. Let me explain something to you: I went entire years without caring about Loki, and then around the time The Dark World came out, I slowly became converted to both a Tom Hiddleston and a Loki fan, and then after Ragnarok, he finally just seduced me completely to being smitten with his stupid trashy self. It is important that you realize that I recognize that Loki is a selfish, inferiority complex-having, murdering bastard and I do not excuse a goddamn thing he does because of his fucking Daddy issues. That being said, in spite of how much of a flaming trashbag he is, I love him anyway, and I tried for months to tell myself that I knew as a fellow writer that Loki was going to die in Infinity War. It was assured not only from the trailer, but from me knowing that his character arc was always going to end with his death. What hurt most of all is that, as I predicted, Loki died trying to save Thor. I cried my eyes out. Hell, once Thanos closed his hand around Loki’s neck, I covered my eyes because I just didn’t have it in me to see it end this way for him and for Thor. Thor being helpless to stop it is truly what made it worse. There is nothing on heaven or earth Thor wouldn’t do for Loki, even knowing how wicked Loki is. And the fact that Loki couldn’t let Thanos kill Thor after all these two have been through was like an icepick through my heart. Loki wouldn’t have died protecting Thor if Thor had not loved him unconditionally this entire time we’ve watched their story. Thor’s love did have an effect on Loki throughout these films, and that’s why I literally burst into sobs and couldn’t bear to see him die that way. It is one of the most gut wrenching things ever put to film, and certainly in the MCU. I’ve only had the stomach to watch that scene twice because it hurts me so much, and neither time was I strong enough to actually watch Loki’s final moments. Goddamn, it’s just so painful. Capped off with Thor slowly crawling over to his brother to be with him one last time before the ship explodes and just laying his head on his chest in the kind of grief that honestly should get Hemsworth a fucking Oscar. Bravo. 

-Cap, Widow, and Falcon reuniting with Vision and Wanda. Holy shit, yes. This fight was gorgeous, gripping, and fucking awesome. Special props to Cap and Widow being the ride or die Avengers Mom and Dad team. We can infer from their actions that the two of them have been together since the end of Civil War possibly, so you can not tell me Cap and Widow are not a thing on some level. Captasha all day, err day. They perfectly compliment each other and I headcanon that they’re together and no one will convince me otherwise.

-”We’ll fight you too.”/”We don’t trade lives.” That sound you hear is me screeching. Some people have said Cap wasn’t given a ton to do this time around, and I emphatically protest it simply because, yes, he has less screentime, but man, he does so much work in this role that reminds us of why we all love Captain America. His values mean so much. Cap will lay down his life in the blink of an eye for someone who needs it. He cares so deeply. He is the pinnacle of selflessness and it’s so important to see in this film.

-Thor meeting the Guardians. Perfection. Just…perfection.

-Irondad and Spiderson aboard the Space Donut. Jesus fucking Christ, I am so on board for Irondad and Spiderson that it’s insane. I love that entire fucking interaction from start to finish. I love Tony’s strict, fatherly anger and exasperation because he just wants his baby boy to be safe on earth while he’s on another suicide mission, but the baby boy wants to help his dad out and baby boy also doesn’t quite realize the consequences because he’s too young. Extra points for Tony’s death-glare after Parker says, “It’s kind of your fault I’m here” and the fact that even the fucking cloak did a double take at Parker when he said it. Oh, it’s so perfect.

-Gamora making Peter promise to kill her if Thanos gets to her. I just…I want to die. This was so beautifully done, and so in character for both of them, and Peter and Gamora are just so soft and sweet and in love that it’s so overwhelming. At the very least, I take a small comfort in knowing that they were a happy family for four years before this shit happened to them.

-Gamora “killing” Thanos. Again, can we just award Oscars to like half the fucking cast in this movie? Jesus Christ, I cried at this scene too because the fact that she’s just completely unraveled as she finally thinks she’s killed her goddamn abuser is so deeply tragic. Gamora is my favorite Guardian. Hands down. She is so three dimensional. She tries so hard and she is so much more than the deadliest woman in the galaxy. She is so complex and it is the worst pain ever to know that Peter actually kept his promise and tried to kill her to prevent her from being in the hands of her abuser again and Thanos foiled their plan, and had the fucking nerve to say, “I like him” before he took her again. 

-”It’ll kill you.” “Only if I die.” “…yes, that’s what killing you means.”��

-The battle of Wakanda. Motherfucker. This is some A+++ motherfucking good shit hurr. What always gets me hype as hell is Cap and T’Challa sprinting down the goddamn hill at 80 mph and I just can’t even handle that shit because it was so good and satisfying. Everything about this battle was incredible.

-The battle on Titan. Same thing. It’s so creative and well crafted and amazing. You feel every blow. You flinch. You want them to beat that son of a bitch but he’s just so fucking strong. It is an incredibly engaging fight, man. Hoo boy. 

-Thor’s entrance to the battle of Wakanda. I distinctly remember the entire audience going absolutely apeshit during this scene the night Infinity War premiered. Like the first Avengers, I saw it three times in theaters, and two out of the three times, the crowd went fucking wild. That was so fucking satisfying, man, as are the neat little scenes of levity with Cap introducing himself to Groot and Cap and Thor remarking on each other’s changes in appearance. It was so pure and good and perfect.      

-Cap squaring up with Thanos. I. Can’t. Breathe. It was so powerful. Like the above scene of “we don’t trade lives,” this is why we love Captain America. Why we love Steve Rogers. This man, this mortal human man, took one goddamn fucking look at that twelve foot all powerful alien giant and said, “Not today, bitch.” Steve fucking Rogers stood there and took it. He put his life on the goddamn line for Wanda, and for Vision, and for the rest of the universe, and he actually held that goddamn line for a moment. The incredulous look on Thanos’ face is what seals it. He is utterly confused that this little man is actually holding him back, that this mere mortal doesn’t give a fuck that he can’t overpower him, but he is giving it his all because that is who he is. Steve will not quit. Steve will not falter. Steve will die doing what’s right and that is one of the most moving things in the whole MCU, imo. He just planted his feet and said, “No, you move.” I know we saw that scene in the trailer, but it was so unbelievable to see it in context that Cap gave it everything he had trying to protect Wanda and the rest of the universe, and I still get choked up just thinking about that shit. 

Welp, you asked for it and now you have it. I told you I was gonna rave, man. God bless anyone who actually read this nonsense. Marvel had me at hello with these characters and they have way too much sway over my emotions, as you can see above. Ten years, man. Ten years. 

[aion-rsa]

Clickbait’s Twist Ending Makes No Sense

https://ift.tt/2WsT59s

Warning: contains spoilers for the Clickbait finale.

Criticising Netflix’s Clickbait for implausibility feels a bit like criticising a branch of McDonalds for not having a Michelin star – it’s missing the point. Of course Clickbait is implausible, it’s a McSpicy with fries, not Beluga caviar. It’s trashy and twisty and formulated to keep us watching until it serves up something shaped like an ending, and then to release us back into our lives with the only lasting impression being, ‘Oh yeah, I watched that. Had the guy from Entourage.’

Clickbait though, is built on such an implausible premise that it verges on insult – to viewers, to the trashy thriller genre, and to anybody who knows what it means to sync a mobile phone. It’s a cyber-mystery with a vaguely judgmental stance on the internet (bad because: snuff videos and revenge porn and catfishing and data harvesting and empty hook-up apps and in this age of mass connection, when did we stop actually connecting?) and a cyber blind spot the size of California, where it’s set – really Australia in disguise.

In episode one, an online video is posted of father-of-two physicotherapist Nick Brewer (the guy from Entourage aka Adrian Grenier) holding signs saying “I abuse women”, and “At five million views I die”. Nick’s loved ones then immediately watch the video so many times that it easily clears the five million mark, and (spoiler) not long afterwards, his corpse is discovered with his head bashed in. 

Nick had been kidnapped and put on video by the brother of Sarah, a woman who killed herself six months earlier after being ignored by her online boyfriend. The online boyfriend had irritably told Sarah to follow through on her threat to take her own life, so the brother found him responsible for her death. The brother also thought that Nick was Sarah’s online boyfriend, but he was wrong. Nick didn’t know anything about this woman. She had been catfished by someone who’d set up a fake dating profile using Nick’s photographs. That person was his office receptionist Dawn Gleed (Becca Lish).

Read more

TV

Netflix’s Clickbait Ending: Was Nick Guilty?

By Louisa Mellor

Two years before he was murdered, Nick started a new job. Receptionist Dawn Gleed (old and childless, therefore lonely and unfulfilled in a beautiful-people-show like this one) set up his work login, using a password of his choice, and synced his mobile phone to his work computer. While his phone was syncing, a home screen notification came up from dating site D8R. It was a flirtatious message from a woman named Mandy, chasing Nick up after he’d complimented some bikini photos she’d sent him. This was all Nick, remember. Though married, he’d set up a fake profile under the name ‘Nick Chabot’, pretending that he was an architect in San Jose instead of an Oakland physiotherapist, and looked at Mandy’s bikini pics. 

Dawn initially looked shocked at seeing the D8R message, but after a bottle of wine at home that night, she used Nick’s password to log in to his D8R account and start messaging Mandy, posing as Nick. Dawn got a taste for it, and this carried on for two years, with multiple women over multiple online dating apps. She would set up new fake profiles using Nick’s photos, message and phone the women using voice-altering software, and then delete the profile and move on to the next app. It was a loneliness-based hobby of hers.

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But one that shouldn’t, by rights, have lasted longer than a single night. The day Dawn first drunkenly logged into Nick’s D8R account and started sending and receiving messages, Nick’s mobile phone was synced to his D8R account (which is how Dawn found out about it in the first place). Therefore, every message Dawn sent posing as him on that site that night would also have shown up as an alert on Nick’s phone. Mandy Harrison later confirmed that she and ‘Nick’ exchanged “tons of messages” but never met in person before she ended things, having sensed that something was off. 

Even disregarding the home-screen notifications from his supposedly secret dating app (not the smartest adulterer, Nick), the next time Nick logged in to D8R himself, he would have seen the “tons of messages” exchanged with Mandy Harrison. Why did it take him until he was kidnapped two years later to find out that Dawn was using him for her catfish identity? Dawn was using his log-in and password, not one she’d created. Yes, she could have changed the settings and locked him out of the account, and yes, Nick could have set up that fake profile, sent that flirtatious message and then never logged in again, but none of it feels solid as an explanation.

There are other questions, most of which can probably be answered with ‘thriller characters be crazy’. Why the seemingly arbitrary five million view rule for the video? Why did Dawn’s husband Joe nonsensically murder Nick when identity theft was the only charge Dawn was facing at the time? Why did Dawn and Joe then think that kidnapping and – who knows – murdering Nick’s son Kai, who’d followed the trail to their house, was the best way to avoid prison? Why wouldn’t Nick tell his beloved wife Sophie the truth about his dad’s suicide? Why did Sarah Burton use the pseudonym Maggie Oxley in her online dating profile? Why did none of Dawn’s victims – like Emma, who was planning to marry ‘Nick’ and happily used Facetime when his son called her – accept daily phone calls from her online boyfriend but never a video chat? 

For that matter, why did Emma still insist that Nick was the kindest, nicest man in the world after she learned he’d been using a fake name and wasn’t called Danny Walters, as he’d told her? Why were Emma and Sarah delighted and not creeped out to receive pictures ‘Nick’ had Photoshopped of themselves with him at the beach? Why did Dawn go to the trouble of inventing fake names for her ‘Nick’ personas, and then tell her victims specific details about his life, including the correct names and ages of his kids and the fact that he attends a specific college team’s women’s volleyball matches? Why, when Sarah’s brother was reading aloud details about Nick’s marriage and volleyball team from her journal was the page she’d written actually about a bird eaten by her cat? Why, why, why? 

Why? Some of the above is poetic licence – characters doing stupid, unrecognisable things because it serves the plot. Some of it is more slapdash – perhaps as a result of the added strains of producing television drama during a pandemic. Some of it is less excusable – breaking trust with the viewer and undermining the cast’s good work because it’s more important to keep us guessing and pressing ‘Next Episode’ than it is to provide a payoff that really works. It’s a junk-food thriller after all, look at the title. You can hardly accuse it of false advertising.

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Clickbait is available to stream now on Netflix.

The post Clickbait’s Twist Ending Makes No Sense appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[mermaidsirennikita]

Favorite Reads 2017

2017 was, all in all, not the greatest year for books (for me personally).  A few follow-ups to series-starters I loved disappointed me; there was a lack of new historical fiction that was truly compelling; YA was very hit or miss.  But there are always exceptions to the years unspoken “rules”, and I found myself reading more thrillers than I had before.  Maybe the bright side of my usual categories (I don’t know that they’re all genres) failing me is that I had to get a bit more adventurous.

In no particular order, my top ten favorite books of the year were as follows...

Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin Kwan.  Rachel is an ABC--American Born Chinese.  Smart, practical, and successful, she’s dating Nicholas Young, quite possibly the man of her dreams--but there’s a bit of mystery about him.  So when Nick brings her to his family home in Singapore to attend his friend’s wedding, she’s shocked to discover that he’s the heir to a fabulous fortune, hailing from one of the most high-profile and wealthy families in Asia, or perhaps even the world.  Everyone is out to break up Rachel and Nick, it seems; but especially his mother, the conniving and clever matriarch Eleanor.  This is one of the most addictive books I’ve ever read, and the rest of the trilogy thankfully measures up.  God, I was hooked; and it’s nothing like what I expected.  There are vapid characters, sure, but this isn’t Gossip Girl--the book is wickedly smart, and Kwan seems to make great insights about “crazy rich Asian culture” without ever seeming sanctimonious.  The characters are great--you root for Nick and Rachel’s romance while falling in love with his Machiavellian mother, and for that matter his tragic It Girl cousin Astrid.  Unfortunately, this book has been categorized by some as trashy... and sure, at times it is.  But it’s also one of the best books I’ve read in a long time.

Wintersong by S. Jae-Jones.  In nineteenth century Europe, Liesl is a gifted composer.  But she’s overshadowed by her brother Josef, a musician, and their beautiful sister Kathe.  As a child, Liesl knew the Goblin King; and she meets him again as a young woman, stealing her sister away from the mortal world.  Liesl makes a bargain with the Goblin King: if he returns Kathe, Liesl will become his bride.  The Goblin King--enchanted with her music--whisks her away to his realm, creating a world of delights that’s hard for Liesl to resist.  This book is basically everything a grown woman could want Labyrinth to be.  Liesl and the Goblin King do have a captivating romance, but it’s not so much insta-love as I would say it’s a sexual awakening.  I don’t think she’s starry-eyed; she’s more attracted to him physically, and experiencing the thrill of having someone return that attraction for the first time.  So much of the book is about passion--the Goblin King’s passion for Liesl, their shared passion for her music, the Fair Folk’s passion in general for things that they can’t have.  It’s a melancholy, haunting book with just the right side of indulgence to make it impossible for me to resist.

Final Girls by Riley Sager.  After surviving a massacre that took all of her friends during a college cabin trip, Quincy is a part of what the press calls “the Final Girls”.  Lisa survived a sorority girl slaying, while Sam was nearly murdered at the motel she worked at.  But the three don’t really interact, as Quincy is determined to live a normal life.  She doesn’t even remember what happened to her on the night of the Pine Cottage murders.  That all changes when Lisa is found dead of a supposed suicide, and Sam shows up on Quincy’s doorstep.  Quincy needs to remember what happened all those years ago--before it’s too late.  This book is far from your run of the mill thriller, with unexpected twists and a feminist slant.  It’s almost a satire of slasher tropes--except the plot is a bit too coherent for a satire, and everything is a little too real.  I blazed through it, and wasn’t exactly sure of what happened until the very end.

Warcross by Marie Lu.  Teenager Emika Chen makes her living as a bounty hunter--specifically, tracking down people who illegally bet on Warcross, the virtual reality game that’s taken the world by storm.  Of course, Emika’s hacks in the game aren’t exactly legal either, so when she’s summoned to Tokyo by the game’s creator, billionaire Hideo Tanaka, she assumes the worst.  But Hideo has a proposition for her: if she can find out who’s at the heart of a dangerous security glitch in the game, the payout will be huge.  But as Emika competes undercover, she realizes that the stakes--personal and professional--are much higher than she thought.  This is one of those books that really surprised me. You don’t have to be a gamer to follow “Warcross”--which also, surprise, has a great romance to go along with it--but the parts of the story that pertain to the game are just as compelling as the bounty hunting plot.  What pleased me most, however, was the ending; nothing is as it seems in this book, and the characters are much grayer than you might imagine.

Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardoust.  This retelling of Snow White focuses on the relationship between Lynet, our princess, and Mina, her wicked stepmother.  Lynet is the living embodiment of her dead mother, and recently made the queen of the southern territories by her father--which displaces Mina, of the southern territories and devoted to her homeland.  What Lynet doesn’t know, as we’re told the story of Mina’s past, is that she was made from snow by Mina’s alchemist father--who, using the same magic, saved Mina’s life by making her a heart of glass. Mina believes herself incapable of love, and despite her closeness to Lynet, she grows increasingly threatened by the girl.  This fairy tale is decidedly dark--but it’s clear that this isn’t darkness of the sake of darkness.  Rather, we see the good and bad in both Mina and Lynet, two women driven apart by the machinations of men--but perhaps not permanently.  

An Enchantment of Ravens by Margaret Rogerson.  The painter Isobel caters to a specific clientele: the fair folk.  Incapable of “craft”, they treasure Isobel’s paintings, but are feared for their predatory and capricious ways.  Isobel’s always been careful around the fair folk, but slips up when she paints the autumn prince, Rook, accidentally depicting sorrow in his eyes.  This creates a great weakness for Rook, who takes her on a journey to the autumnlands, so that she can stand trial and dispel the notions of any mortality in Rook.  Of course, there is the issue of their attraction to each other--because if a mortal and a fairy fall in love, their lives will be forfeit.  This is a lovely fairy tale, with a romance that is much more hard-won and realistic than what I expected from the summary.  While Rook is just as fanciful as you’d expect a fairy to be, Isobel has her feet planted in reality, and I love a story in which the main character really, really doesn’t want to fall in love.  This book depicts the fair folk with just the right balance of fear and whimsy, and I dare you to read it without falling for the world.

Flame in the Mist by Renee Ahdieh.  The daughter of a samurai, cunning Mariko is on her way to meet her betrothed, a prince.  Along the way, her party is attacked by a group of bandits paid to assassinate Mariko--killing her servants along the way.  Disguising herself as a boy, she infiltrates the bandits’ group--known as the Black Clan--determined to find who was sent to kill her, and get revenge.  This retelling of “Mulan” takes on gender roles in a fantasy realm influenced by Japanese history, with Mariko standing as a strong female character, but also a girl.  Renee Ahdieh is great at building these history-based fantasy worlds--and she’s not too shabby when it comes to the romance department, either.

Caraval by Stephanie Garber.  Scarlett and Tella live a sheltered existence, dominated by their abusive father.  Scarlett--the responsible one--has always dreamed of going to Caraval, the magical circus-like show that sucks the audience into the game.  In an effort to make her sister relax, Tella takes Scarlett to Caraval, only to get swept up in its magic.  The object of this year’s game?  To find Tella.  So Scarlett joins a host of people looking for her sister--but the line between reality and fantasy on the island is blurred, and Caraval may turn out to be just as dangerous as it looks.  This is the sort of dreamy fantasy that is just delicious to read, especially during cold weather.  

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid.  Unknown journalist Monique is stunned when she’s selected to interview the notoriously private movie star Evelyn Hugo, famous for her beauty, talent, and seven husbands.  As Monique is drawn into Evelyn’s story, she becomes more and more curious about why Evelyn chose her, and who the real love of Evelyn’s life was.  Evelyn is clearly based on Elizabeth Taylor in some ways, but the story is really all her own.  While Evelyn’s tale is obviously more compelling than Monique’s, they satisfyingly come together in a way I didn’t quite expect.  Really, at its heart this is a love story; but it’s also quite the piece of Old Hollywood glamour, with all the gossip and controversy that you’d expect.

The Language of Thorns by Leigh Bardugo.  This anthology of fairy tales is set in Leigh Bardugo’s grishaverse, but all take a little bit from those that you might be familiar with.  They’re dark and sensual, some of them a little gory.  But what really got me is that these are stories I can really see the characters from Bardugo’s other books telling.  The world feels fully realized, the morals complex but solid and a little dated, but with reason.  Read this if you want to be transported and a little spellbound.