#Nah they're all weird (awesome) looking

[3-n-a]

((I love it when people freak out over ANY of the lads' looks.. Because man, they are NOT normal.

[ofstarsandvibranium]

A Day in the Life...

Fandom: Marvel (Actor AU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader

Summary: You're hired to be famous actor, Bucky Barnes' social media manager. This is probably the best and worst job you've ever gotten because Bucky gives you free reign of his social media but also...you may or may not be crushing on Bucky aka your boss. Based off my imagine here.

A/N: this is 3,180 words because i refused to break it up into parts. anyway, ENJOY!

You press record and begin to narrate, "A Day in the Life of a Social Media Manager for a Super Big and Popular Actor *Working Title*"

You face the camera to you and continue to speak, "Bucky had some morning meetings but I wasn't allowed to film. So now here he is doing his daily workout."

You pan the camera to him and he says, "Hi," with a shy smile.

You snort, stopping the recording, "What?"

"This is..." he gestures to you and your work phone, "awkward."

"Then don't make it awkward! And hey, you said I had free reign! I asked your followers what they'd like to see and they say they want a glimpse of your daily life."

His brows furrow, "Didn't you just say this is a day in the life of a social media manager?"

You shrug, "The poll was tied to seeing your daily life and my daily life working for you. So I just decided to put the two together. Anyway, the title is a work in progress. We'll see how this does and go from there. Anyway, just ignore me. I'm not even here."

Bucky gets back to his work out. He has an outdoor and indoor set up. Because the weather was nice, he decided to do his workout outside...shirtless.

He goes to the lifting station, picking up some weights. You begin to narrate again, but this time in a Steve Irwin impression, "Right. Now watch as the esteemed actor gets ready to work out his arms in preparation for an awesome movie that I'm not allowed to mention."

Bucky lets out a chuckle, dropping the weights and looking back at you, "You filming a nature documentary now?" he rests his hands on his hips and smirks at you in a way that makes you want to melt.

You give a playful yet dramatic sigh, dropping your filming arm down, "Are you this difficult with your directors, Barnes?"

He shakes his head, "Nah. None of my directors have been as dorky as you."

You stick your tongue out at him, "Fine. I'll leave you to your workout."

"No, hey, I was joking! Don't leave me!"

You shake your head, "It's fine, Bucky. I'll leave you to it. I'll chalk up some other videos we could do. Also, the getty images from last night's premiere are up. Did you want to look through them before I post?"

He shakes his head, "I trust your judgement." he turns around, his bare back facing you. You stay and watch as he do a few arm curls and immediately rush back into his home.

"Get it together, Y/N," you mumble to yourself, leaving your boss to his workout.

________________________

During Bucky's fitting for New York's Fashion Week, you were allowed to take some behind the scenes pictures. You have a few candid ones of Bucky standing in front of a mirror, his stylist fixing his collar, and him looking at the different shoe options.

Then you included some goofy ones where he copies a pose of a mannequin, a selfie of you two showing of your shoe choices (his being very fancy and yours being your regular sneakers), and then a selfie of him wearing a pair of sunglasses without a lens.

You posted all of them after fashion week was over and his Instagram followers were LOVING it.

bbarnesfan: STAHP. he's so adorable.

xbucky-muncher: he went from serious to dork. get you a man who can do both.

notyouraveragebuckyfan: ok but him and his social media manager are so cute together???

bbarnesfan replies: they're literally bucky's employee. don't be weird.

notyouraveragebuckyfan replies: i'm just saying! they seem like they have great chemistry! have you seen the tiktoks and reels of them together?

"How come you put the candids and the selfies all in one post?" Bucky asks as he looks through the latest post you made.

You're scrolling through the analytics of the last tiktok you two made, one where he guesses if one of his characters said a specific line or it's made up.

You take note of the demographics, the comments, etc. to be mindful of for the next posts you make.

Without looking up from your laptop, you answer, "It shows people the different sides of you. How you take things seriously but you can also have fun with it."

He hums, "Lots of people think we look cute together." He says this in hopes of getting some sort of reaction from you.

You continue to work, not looking back at them, "Don't pay attention to those comments. The internet will make up all kinds of stuff."

Bucky's shoulders sag a bit as he replies, "Yeah. You're right."

You'd been working for him for almost a year now. He doesn't see you every day like he did when you first were hired on. Now you only come over twice a week to go over analytics with his team and to shoot some content. Most of the time, you work from your place and Bucky's been feeling more lonely ever since.

Your presence brightened his day and you provided a breath of fresh air on his busier days. He genuinely enjoyed your company and liked making content with you. He liked learning more about you, having meals together, and just being with you. He thought that maybe there was something there between you, but then he'd be reminded that you're his employee and he's your boss. It can't work out.

But there were some glimpsed of hope. You'd look at Bucky a certain way or make a comment that seemed a little more flirty. It had to mean something, right? But whenever Bucky tried to push a little more, you'd pull away and he hated it. It was so complicated.

He wanted you as more than an employee but his team clocked him on his feelings and told him not to fuck it up because you've helped Bucky's image immensely.

He can't fuck this up, not matter how much his heart yearns for more.

___________________________

"Hello, hello!" you greet Bucky, handing him his coffee as he lets you into his home. You've been working for him for over a year. It's one out of the two days you come over to do work with him.

His stylist, Michael, was nice enough to bring some clothes over for a TikTok video that you had which was "My Social Media Manager Picks Out My Next Event Outfit".

The next event that Bucky needs to make an appearance in is his friend, Nat's, movie premiere. The dress code is very formal so it's no surprise to see various kinds of formal wear.

What does surprise you is that you see a rack of clothes that you know wouldn't be for Bucky.

"Um...what's this?"

He grins widely at you, "Clothes for you to choose from."

Your brows shoot up in surprise, "Excuse me?"

"You said you've always wanted to go to one right? You're coming with me."

"As your social media manager?"

"You're not working the event. You're going as my plus one."

"Uuuuhhh..."

"You don't have to, but I was hoping to bring you as, ya know, a thank you for all the amazing work you've done for me this past year."

You can't help but snort, "Bucky, c'mon, did all of your usuals reject you or something?"

"You're the only person I've asked right now. Come on, Y/N, please?"

You want to. You really, really want to. But these past few months, you and Bucky have been toeing the line between a work relationship and something more. You're not sure if going as his plus one to the premiere is a good idea, especially since even more people have been commenting on your chemistry.

But Bucky's looking at you with those gorgeous blue eyes and he's pouting and he looks so cute, so how could you say no?

"I'll think about it," you reply and it seems to appease Bucky because he smiles again and says, "Okay. But I really do hope you'll go. It'll be fun, plus you've met Nat. She thinks you're cool."

You scoff, "There's no way Natasha Romanoff, the hottest and most popular actress right now, thinks I'm cool."

He shrugs, "Everyone thinks you're cool. It's hard to not like you, Y/N, trust me," he gives you a wink and it makes your cheeks warm up, "Anyway, so let's see what we got."

You wordlessly nod, going over to set up your work phone to begin filming.

________________________

You think you did really well with picking out Bucky's outfit. It was a royal blue velvet jacket with a black bow tie, and black slacks. Even Michael was impressed with your choice.

Even though you weren't working tonight, you still took some pictures and clips just in case. You took a video of the reveal of your look tonight and can't help but feel bubbly inside when Bucky wouldn't stop looking at you.

To distract yourself, you decided to take candids of Bucky getting his hair done after you were finished getting ready. He kept making funny faces at you, making you laugh.

After you both were ready, you took some mirror selfies, obviously, and sent them to Bucky afterwards.

You're in the car on the way to the premiere when you get a bunch of texts and notifications from people:

Wanda: I KNOW YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO THE PREMIERE BUT YOU DIDN'T SAY AS BUCKY'S DATE!

Pietro: good luck tonight! use protection! ;D

Carol: since when are you dating bucky barnes???

You unlock your phone but see a notification that Bucky tagged you in a post you didn't know he was going to make.

It was the mirror selfies you two took, with the caption: got the most gorgeous date on my arm tonight.

You immediately turn to Bucky, eyes narrowing, "James Buchanan Barnes."

"...I don't like how you just used my government name like that."

"Why would you post those selfies of us?!"

He shrugs, "Because we look great."

"And the caption?"

"It's true. You're gorgeous."

You groan and pinch the bridge of your nose, "Your publicist and manager are gonna kill me."

"No, they won't."

"They hired me to make sure your online presence is good and won't jeopardize your career."

"Nothing's gonna happen, Y/N."

"People already assume we're together because of how well we work together. It was fine to let them speculate because but that post will make things even worse."

"How?"

"People will think I'm a gold digger? That I got this job because we're sleeping together? I don't know! The internet makes up all kinds of fucked up reasons and I won't be able to get work ever again!"

"But is it so bad that people think we're together?"

"For you, it won't be bad. For me, it could be. So, please, Bucky, delete those photos before even more people see it."

Bucky's jaw clenches and mumbles out, "Fine. I'm sorry," he takes out his phone and you watch as he deletes the photos off his instagram. Tonight was supposed to be fun, but you're sure you just ruined it.

____________________

The entire night was awkward. Bucky did his best to still include you in conversations he had with friends and colleagues, but you felt the tension between you two. You did your best to enjoy it as much as you can. You saw Nat for a brief moment where you hugged her and congratulate her. She said she wanted to chat later but you didn't really expect much. This is her premiere and she has other priorities.

She proved you wrong, however, during the after party where she pulled you to an area for more privacy.

"Hey, how are you?"

"Um, good. A little overwhelmed, but, uh, tonight's been...fun."

She tilts her head and narrows her eyes at you, just like her character did in the movie, and you can't help but let the truth spill, "I freaked out on Bucky on the way here. He posted pictures of us that insinuate we're together and I don't want it to result in me getting fired and potentially never getting a job like this ever again."

"Yeah, I saw that before he deleted it. You guys looked cute. Also, are you two not dating?"

"What? No! He's literally my boss!"

She shrugs, "Could've fooled me. Anyway, there's something clearly going on between you two, right?"

"I, uh, I don't know what to say. Do I have feelings for him? Yes. But will I act on them? No. Again, he's my boss, I'm his employee. I really like this job too, so I can't risk anything."

"I feel like there's a 'but' coming."

"...but he's so amazingly funny, smart, hot, understanding, compassionate, and I just love spending time with him. It's so fucked, Nat.

She nods in understanding, "I know, hon. I'm gonna say the most cliche thing ever, but listen to your heart. I'm sure you'll find another job just as fun as this one, but to be with someone you click so well with? That doesn't come often."

"Hey, you okay?" Bucky comes up from behind, placing a hand on your hip and looking at you with concern.

Nat flashes him a smile, "Just wanted to catch up with them, but I've hogged up your date long enough, Barnes." she turns back to you, "Think about what I said, okay? Enjoy the rest of your night and thanks for coming," she hugs you and heads back out to the party.

Bucky nods to her and stands in front of you, "Did you want to stay longer or are you ready to go?"

"I think I'm ready to go for the night."

"Alright." you follow him out to the front where you wait for the driver to pick you guys up. He stands beside you with his hands in his pockets, wearing that gorgeous outfit you chose.

"I'm sorry again about the pictures."

"Thank you, I'm sorry I attacked you like that."

He shakes his head, "Don't be. I get why you did. But, um, we're good?"

You nod, "Yeah, Bucky, we're good."

"Good," he gives you a shy smile and then points at the upcoming car, "Our ride's here." As soon as the SUV pulls up, he opens the door for you and lets you go in first. He follows and the drive home is in silence.

_________________________

You're working in your little alcove at Bucky's when he approaches you, "Hey, I need to talk to you about something."

You turn in your chair and look up at him, "This doesn't sound good."

"It's good and bad."

"Um, okay?" you clasp your hands together in your lap in anxiousness.

"So...I'm hiring a different social media manager."

Your heart drops, "Wh-What? But-But I thought I was doing well. Your team said I was doing a good job. What happened?"

"You are, but lemme also add that there's another job already waiting for you."

"Bucky, I'm so confused right now. Are you firing me? Or contracting me to someone else?"

"I'm firing you because I can't date an employee."

You straighten up at his statement, "Excuse me?"

Bucky steps closer to you, reaching out and grabbing your hand, "It's just...shit, Y/N, you gotta know how I feel about you right?"

You bite your lip in nervousness, "Maybe."

He lets out a long sigh and run a hand through his cropped hair, "Listen, I like you. A lot. That's the real reason I wanted you to come with me to the premiere. I love spending time with you and I've been so much happier since you've started working for me. To be honest, I didn't know how much longer I could keep myself from wanting to be with you. So to still make sure your professionalism was in tact, I reached out to Nat to see if she was in need of an amazing social media manager and, luckily, she was."

"I'm gonna work for Nat? Nat wants me to work for her?"

Bucky nods, "She does. So you'll be working for her which means I'm not longer your boss. Which means...will you go on a date with me?"

Fuck it. Fuck it all. You held in your feelings for Bucky for so long and now you've been given a loophole to be with him.

"I like you too, Bucky. So much, I didn't say anything, obviously, because I wanted to remain professional, but fuck did you make it hard to not fall for you."

Bucky snickers with a smirk, "I can say the same thing about you." His thumb caresses the back of your hand and it feels so right.

"Have you actually hired someone to take over for me?"

"Not officially, but I have some applicants already. Why? Do you know someone?"

You nod, "I do. She just graduated college with a degree in communications with a concentration in social media. I can have her send in an application, but I one hundred percent vouch for her. She's done great work."

"Alright. I trust you, but I don't think I can find anyone who works as well as you do."

"I fucking hope not. Or else you might leave me for them!"

"Never," Bucky replies confidently with a softness in his voice and adoration in his eyes.

"So...about that date..."

_______________________

"Come with me to work for a popular actor!" Kamala narrates her latest TikTok.

"So Bucky is working on a new movie with Natasha Romanoff so for promo we're filming a bunch of different content!" Nat and Bucky wave at the camera.

"After filming all of that, they're off to a photoshoot. Here are some of the potential outfits they can wear." the camera pans to several racks of clothing.

"There's a lunch break and here's my lunch versus Bucky's lunch," Kamala's plate is pasta while Bucky's roast chicken, "The boss needs to bulk up for another role so he needs a lot of protein."

"And that's all that I can show you for today. Until next time, bye!"

You scroll to the comments and they're immediately flooded with"

you're not y/n???

wait, did y/n quit?! did bucky fire them?! no!

what happened to y/n?!

and so on.

You snort and show Bucky, who was cuddling you from behind, "I told you people would notice."

He peers over your shoulder to look at your phone, "Kamala actually had an idea for that."

_________________

"A Day in the Life of an Actor's Social Media Manager. Part...whatever. So we're doing more promo stuff for Bucky and Nat's new movie. But this time I'm also working with Nat's social media manager, Y/N! We're doing a What's in the Box Challenge and here's a clip of Bucky freaking out."

"IT'S MOVING! WHY IS IT MOVING?!"

"Also look at Bucky and Y/N. They're so cute together. And yes, guys, they're totally dating now which is why Y/N no longer works for Bucky. ANYWAY..."

[thatdeadaquarius]

Omg

Hey

Hey!

HEY!!

WHAT ABOUT GOD READER THAT GOT A CURSE PLACED ON THEM BY SOMEONE THEY DON'T LIKE

That curse makes them turn to random ages like,, one day you wake up and your like 3 and the other you're 29 and the acolytes just have to deal with it for a months (and just for funziz you don't keep your memories as a kid *evil laugh*)

I feel like people who are generally around kids would be great around us and some others .... Less so (*cough cough* ei)

AND EVEN BETTER

WHAT IF ENGLISH ISN'T OUR FIRST LANGUAGE AND IT SUMTGING LIKE FRENCH OR SPANISH, AND THE ACOLYTES ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE TEYING TO TALK TO YOU WHILE 14 YEAR OLD READER IS CURLED UP IN A BALL CUS THEY'RE SCARED LSKFJGJDLSK

let the tennage/ kid reader be neurodivergent/autistic (cuz i am and theres bot enough rep on this god forsaken app .·´¯`(>▂<)´¯`·.)

n E wayss <3

LOVE YA !!!!

Aka. your fave >:D kiss kiss

A KISS KISS??!!! FOR ME?!!! 😊🥰😚 <3

BRO i literally designed a whole original character around that concept lmao (except they remember/just body change/everything else kinda matches ur desc! :0 )

☆

Sun: Gender Neutral Reader (they/them only), Neurodivergent!Reader, Child!Reader, Teen!Reader

Planet: Language Shenanigans, Platonic

Orbit: Headcanons-ish, mini scenarios

Stars: Arataki Itto, Kuki Shinobu, ft. Kujou Sara, Ei + Raiden Shogun, Inazumans

Comets & Meteors: No Content Warnings & No Triggers Detected.

no bc gif is me as a kid, bc I didn't experience snow until I was 12 💀 +it stayed for like one day, was 1 inch deep, or like 5 cm (for my non-americans out there), and was gone the next lmao- I was terrified when I moved and got REAL snowy days- jfc Snezhnaya would kill little me-

SO I was kinda stuck on this tbh, i usually default to like, headcanons or scenarios if ppl dont specify/im just adding onto what you already said like when its not even really a request u know?

so, uh tried to do headcanons, but idk how good it is Orah, sorry!

Also ik you mentioned as example, but we sticking to Inazuma, bc i feel like I neglect them lol

also i hope u like Itto 💀

♤

you quickly found out that magic obeys some weird type of logic despite being magic, so you only ever fluctuate in age within the range you’ve already been,

ur kinda glad youre not seeing what you look like at 100 years old and getting stuck that way for weeks- only Sophie from Howl’s Moving Castle can be cursed to be old yet has so much rizz that she’s still badass and pulls a wizard boyfriend LMAO

so just bc idk what to make the max,

let’s put you at originally, also bc im not a minor, 20 yrs old

so what I mean by all the above is: you’ve lived 2 decades, 1-20 are the only ages you can be

-that being said,

you’re a menace.

so yeah you could’ve been a quiet kid, a well-behaved kid, a good kid even,

…but not in a magical world full of awesome flora and fauna, and magical creatures,

and gods, and vision users and-

you get the point.

plus, you hadn’t really learned English yet until u were a bit older so (who can blame you i hate this language ur so valid)

and for whatever reason English is the only one these guys speak, besides maybe some mythical creatures like the aranara or something

so its kinda absolute chaos trying to reign u in at times.

so needless to say the entirety of Inazuma is terrified for you.

like, even if you aren’t the “Creator” per say in this, they still know what the warmth of your power feels like

But more importantly-

You know who’s the first to spot a random wandering-non-Inazuman-child? And take you in? Especially one that radiates that same energy of presence they feel sometimes + makes them more powerful???

The Amazing, the All-Powerful, Awe-Inspiring Oni: Arataki Itto!

Not even his gang, or Kuki are the first to see you, nah it’s Itto himself,

he literally finds 12 yr old you just sneaking around in awe in Chinju Forest,

and needless to say ur pretty fascinated with the colors and the vibes, and it’s not like Genshin Impact existed when u were this young, ur poor younger self is just rlly paranoidly looking around

Itto is kinda a lot at first, and he was a little confused by ur constant rubbing your arms, or tapping ur fingers on stuff, (or all the stims u be doing when ur nervous) but he just took it all in stride

so Itto, after like an hour and a few well placed rocks at his face and groin by 12 yr old u who was ready to fight to the death at first, FINALLY convinced you by drawing a little picture of his house and his friends

and all that clear effort, despite the foreign world, foreign non-human guy, etc., made you warm up to him too, afterall, even 12 yr old you knew a himbo when they saw one 💪

at first he just thought you were another person who was getting powered up by that yokai he felt (he was convinced thats what you were when u weren’t physically here before, like some kind of powerful gift giving/deal making yokai)

but after he saw you shapeshift the next morning into 16 yr old you, (he lives with his grandma so ur younger self felt pretty safe staying with a himbo guy and an little grandma lady)

he was now more convinced than ever-

that you were some kind of god that’s been in hiding since the archon war (his granny has a lot of cool stories so what?! hes a very educated oni thank you very much!),

rather than a vision user, and he also thinks u being random ages is deffo a curse, and its to keep ur powerfulness limited!! - Arataki Itto, 202X

(bc younger u doesnt remember that u can upgrade ppl, or at least it takes em a learning curve bc they gotta relearn everytime)

okay but itd be so funny tho if nobody else believes that (esp the non-magical folk), bc to them, ur just like, a bunch of siblings (child, teen, adult you lmao) or a tanuki lol

he eventually gets Kuki to believe, after she also sees how you change/the aura is honestly more powerful too once she’s paying attention, like instead of like a blanket, ur like standing in front of a raging campfire

but she makes him keep it a secret

ur really vulnerable a lot of the time, so they’re both worried abt keeping u happy and safe, aw cuties <3

◇

so yeah, ur literally just chillin with the arataki gang all the time now

the gang become ur besties no matter the age, like they love mild pranks, and general chaos, u wanna explore no matter the age, and also love chaos, esp since it can be magical now (oh child you is having the time of their life when they’re around)

its literally a match made in heaven

plus the more hands on deck, the easier it is to keep ur ass from running off as a kid (and an adult, bc omg a shiny?? a shiny crystal fly???!! lmao neurodivergent 🤝crow/raven = shiny solidarity)

honestly Itto has a blast with all versions of you, and he’s literally the best bc he’s a himbo:

so he’s fine with answering context or “obvious” questions all the time LMAO

and if he makes any conclusions abt ppl’s behavior u dont, he’ll explain pretty quick and simple and he never sees it as awkward or smth

its honestly kinda funny bc ur like 10, and just 🤨🤨🤨??? sometimes at ppl (u got better at reading ppl as u got older obv, and at english too, that doesnt help lol)

he’s super sweet abt it, just really quick which is great too,

“he’s irritated at the guard, not us!”

or “she’s relieved, not upset, don’t worry it’s all good!”

like, u never misunderstand ANYBODY with this Oni around!! <3

(this is mainly bc Itto’s gotta know when to bail, joke, stand his ground, etc. from experience, and messing w/Kujou Sara so he’s actually really good at reading people, only when he’s paying attention tho)

◇

so younger u just feels safe around Itto, and so while u do get taught english (mostly by his grandma/Kuki) u also dont rlly mask,

nor do u know how to mask as well as you do in the future

so ur just running around with the gang, living ur little neurodivergent life, and anytime someone points out smth u do that might be awkward, like repeating something over and over as a stim (esp with learning english phrases/new words at times) the gang and Itto, and Kuki, are all ready to protect 💪

but most of the time what happens is- whether unintentionally or not, Itto manages to make THEM feel awkward or like they’re the ones doing something socially weird all the time 😭

just, a parent is like “this kid can’t speak English, do they even know any other language? Because all I keep hearing is them repeating that sound over and over…”

Itto: “Damn you're right they do that a lot, just like how you peek out your window a lot, but we all got our quirks man, no need to be shy about it, the kid isn’t, so just open those curtains, and that window and look out at the world!”

which announces to the whole neighborhood, bc Itto is only ever not loud when you tap his arm as a signal, that the parent is the nosiest bitch ever, he just puts them on blast for everyone to hear lmao

◇

Itto is actually very respectful about you, and while it would, almost be easy bc of the age switching, for him to infantilize you, he’s really good at treating you like an equal no matter how old you are :0 :D

like a giant teddy bear older brother at times, and the guys and Kuki are all pretty good at it too

(tho dw, Kuki is doing all the emotional distress heavy lifting for all of them over your safety, esp bc when u switch at first u are VERY out of your element/disoriented bc u dont always recognize Teyvat/know less English)

but that being said…

Itto fucking loves your excited/happy stims!!!

You flap your hands? Ittos flapping his arms!

You jump up and down, Itto jumps!,

…with his full grown man self with MUSCLES, and causes a mini earthquake wherever you guys are- yknow a shop, the center of town, somebody’s house, near one of the guards 💀 (which always manages to knock them flat on their ass LMFAOO)

Or best of all, you do little stompy stomps??

ITTO DOES HIS STOMPS WITH YOU, like his idle animation does??? :D !!

DUDE- (/gen.n.)

u were like 8 at the time, and saw Kujou Sara for the first time, she’s looking all badass, mostly bc Itto pranked her and she’s power-walking toward u guys pissed as hell ready to arrest him, but u love it anyway bc shes so cool, and right as Sara gets to u two-

u start doing stompy stomps! And Itto joins!!

…and she’s shocked at first, but realizing how giggly and happy u two are, and then Itto explains its bc of her???

Kujou Sara lets Arataki Itto go, for the first time, ever.

she doesnt explain, but she literally was so melted by cuteness, and a warm familiarity??, by u two she couldnt be mad anymore lmao

Itto is now legally obligated to bring you to any and all matters involving the government, regardless of age, according to Kuki Shinobu, his grandma, and himself

all for different reasons tho, Itto’s like, “My lucky charm! My bestie goes everywhere with me!”

meanwhile Kuki/grandma: “A foreign non-Teyvatian speaking child/teen at times is more adept at keeping Itto in line than anyone else, or at least getting him out of the consequences 💀”

♧

Bonus:

The first time you see the Raiden Shogun,

She scares the shit out of 6 yr old you 😭

And she recognizes that familiar aura immediately, so shes just like:

😶😦😰

(You warm up to her after she offers to show you how she can summon lightning, Itto helped her lmao, and Ei also came out to keep u safe bc Raiden is a little… unaware… at times, of mortal limits, and now that ur in a mortal body-)

Also both of them unanimously agree to be the sugar mother to all ur hyperfixation foods/safe foods ever, SCOREEEE

◇

Bonus 2:

*KUKI WOULD LIKE THE COLLECTIVE CITY OF INAZUMA TO KNOW SHE DOES NOT APPROVE OF ITTO TEACHING U ENGLISH CUSSWORDS

☆

I hope somebody likes Itto enough to enjoy this, sorry if u arent a huge fan of him Orah! I just think he's annoying and neat, and havent written abt Inazuma enough lmao

I finally graduated college/uni by the way guys!!!

Ill actually have a life now that wont be hogged by homework! Like writing! Like drawing! Like anything but school!

Anyway, love u guys, another post coming soon,

Safe Travels Orah,

💀♒️

♡my beloved♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk

[woodstoneb-b]

Hello and welcome to Woodstone Manor - I have been here since the beginning, this house growing up in my shadow. A majestic mighty tree that has stood the test of

Nah this is weird...I'm Jay Arondekar and this is all just a simulation. Because video games are awesome and so is this ability my wife, Sam has. She can see ghosts!

She inherited this house from her Great Aunt and after falling down the stairs and kind of dying for a bit - she got better! - she can see actually see and hear ghosts.

There's 8 of them haunting here (well...not exactly, but more on that later)

This is them! Well, almost all of them... From left to right - Trevor aka "No Pants" (fortunately this game doesn't let Sims go pantsless, but he absolutely insisted on me putting him in tiny underpants after this...weirdo.) He's a finance bro from 2000 - he worked at Lehman Brothers (yeah those guys), despite this he's not as shitty as you'd think.

Then there's Sasappis, he goes by Sass (a well deserved nickname my wife tells me), he's a Lanape who's tribe used to live on the land here and he died back in the 1500s. Despite that he really loves TV.

Next to him is Flower - and you can totally guess where she's from right? The 1960s. She died on the property after trying to hug a bear, drugs were involved. She's cool though, if a bit spacey.

The guy next to her is an honest to God Viking from like the year 1000. Did you know there were Vikings in New York?! I did not so this was pretty epic to find out. According to my wife the good news about Thorfinn aka Thor - he's learnt to speak English, the bad news - he talks a lot about murdering and pillaging, also cod, salmon...any fish really.

And your eyes do not deceive you, next to Thor is a soldier from the Revolutionary War - Captain Isaac Higgintoot, who you can learn all about by reading my wife's recently released book on him The Forgotten Founding Father: The Isaac Higgintoot Story - available from all good bookstores! He died from dysentery, but we don't talk about that

The guy in front who looks like boy scout, is not a boy scout, he's Pete, Pine Cone Troop Leader and awesome travel agent (kids ask your parents about that), he's from the 80s, loves D&D, basketball.

And in the back wearing the eyecatching red, is Alberta who you may have heard about from the monthly Murder at the Manor?! podcast hosted by my wife and Todd Pearlman complete and a total loon who has one of Alberta's toenails and wants to clone her she was a raising star in the Jazz Age and her loss is utter tragedy for the music world.

And this is Henrietta "Hetty" Woodstone aka the owner of Woodstone Manor - well, that would actually be my wife, since Hetty is a ghost, but yeah. She wanted a screengrab of just her because as the owner of Woodstone she deserves it. She and her asshole (we're not striking that out? No? OK) husband/cousin, Elias - Mill Owners and Robber Barons built Woodstone in the 1850s. Apparently, there was a house on it when they started, but they made it the place it is today.

Here's the ground floor layout, there's a Ballroom, a Library, a Music Room and a Games Room. So yeah, the Woodstone's were rolling in it!

The first floor, where the bedrooms are, there's actually 9 of them - well 8 if you don't include the Owner's Suite, or 6 if you take out the ghosts' bedrooms (why do ghosts need their own bedrooms? Because getting walked through hurts. They bunk up, Thor and Trevor share the Private Living Room so that means only 3 bedrooms are out of commission. Although the one marked "Spruce" isn't actually available yet because of a terrible mould issue so there's actually 5 guest rooms at the B&B in real life. But for the purposes of the game here, each Ghost gets their own room, again! They're pretty jealous of their simselves to be honest.

We have a basement with an actual secret Vault in it! Sadly, the visions I had a piles of gold ala Scrooge McDuck did not come to be. But you can drink wine down there now, it's accessed by a secret room and passageway. Where exactly is the secret door? You'll have to visit us to find out!

There's also a whole group of ghosts in the hot water heater room that died of Cholera, my wife says be glad you can't see them.

And finally the attic, you don't wanna go up there, it's full of old stuff including metal things that are probably a tetanus hazard. Also there's a ghost of a teenage girl up there, she got murdered on her way to prom in the late 80s and she's pretty pissed about it. Which is totally understandable, although she's also a huge mean girl and that sucks.

So now you have a bit of background! Tune in next time to see how the Ghosts settle in and their excitement at actually being able to leave the Manor grounds! (Did you know Ghosts are bound to the places they haunt? Turns out they are...which is why my wife and I have to put up with them)

[womgi]

Naruto is weird in many ways. Especially in terms of worldbuilding. speaking as someone who was into fanfiction from the 2000s, there was so much that changed in the elements of Naruto that people writing fanfiction were constantly having to change their frameworks, or have to put the rather ignoble looking tag of "non canon compliant" at some point. I have sat through so many author notes talking about "the manga/anime did this, so as of volume/chapter, my story is officially an AU". And there was a lot of it. And that's not talking about the shitload of retconning that Kishimoto just loves. Story stuck? Retcon. Need to escalate? Retcon. Anything at all? Retcon.

Remember when the Kyuubi was a demon? As in a full blown mythological demon rather than what it ended up as? Fanfiction went all in on playing with mythology. The whole Inari business, the Fox summoning contracts, the constant and surprisingly persistent use of "kit" as the pronoun of choice from inmate to warden...all of that was fairly ubiquitous. And back then naruto fanfics were much more imaginative too. The worst villain was Orochimaru, that terrifying amoral mad scientist who was willing to let the world burn for his immortality. He got nerfed.

Or Naruto's father? We all thought he was some guy named Arashi, because of that one panel with the name Arashi Kazama in the Toad summoning scroll. The Fourth Hokage was called that name for a long time, enough to have tons of fanfiction about it at a time when naruto being the Fourth Hokage's son was just a fan theory.

I will always find the idea that we all "knew" Tobi was Obito long before the official announcement funny.

The early speculation about what the other villages were like were rather interesting as well. I mean, consider what we learn about other villages from a manga release timeline. We hear about kiri through Zabuza and his posse. Kirigakure became this villainous, murderous place. We see Suna through the chuunin exams and they're basically this weak village which get owned. Hell, their Kage gets taken out by a random missing nin and they don't even realize! Grass is represented by a team that basically exists to give Orochimaru fleshsuits to infiltrate the Chunin exams with. Ame, they're assholes - like, Hanzo probably hadn't even been conceptualized as a character yet, so they are at this point one-dimensional assholes who exist to get beaten up by the Konoha troupe. We learn about Kumo through Neji's tragic backstory. And we learn that Kumo is a bunch of backstabbing honorless villains. And this shaped how the fans saw the other villages.

Like take Kumo. By the end, Kumo was basically Ninja USA. Militarized, aggressive, and expansionist. Outside of that they also had a lot of Black people, which is an interesting choice for a japanese ninja universe, if a welcome one. That kumo did not exist when Neji's backstory was being belted out to all and sundry. That was a much later invention when Kishimoto got baked(or whatever he does when he gets writers block). Yet, by the end, they seem to be Kishimoto's go to for ninja awesome. Oh, the other villages have badass characters? Hey, look at Kumo! They have lasers! and the stuff of original ninja Jesus! That do cool shit! and their leader is so badass he cuts off his hand without looking at explosions! Lots of Kumo wank in the fanfiction. Or maybe it's just where my searches led.

Or take Oto, sound village. I remember a time when Sound village being a Konoha copy because of Orochimaru being a Konoha missing nin was a thing. They had the whole village with tower in the middle and everything. Sadly, canon has forever robbed us of the classic scene of Orochimaru drowning under paperwork. Why Kishimoto why?

And remember when Itachi was a terrifying villain instead of a tragic hero? I remember reading fics that made Itachi a terrifying force of nature, a sadistic mofo that made satan look like a putz. And then Kishimoto was like "nah" and everyone was suddenly "I heart Itachi! UwU!" or something.

Akatsuki as a whole has gone through a wild ride. When Itachi showed up, there was so much speculation about what they were gonna use the jinchuuriki for. Tailed beast WMDs were fun reads, if terrifying to imagine. Zetsu was a grass nin. Deidara ended up Naruto's brother in so many fics. So many fics that are now forgotten because Akatsuki got a canon backstory.

It's kind of funny how the further we went along the Naruto timeline, the more restrictive fanfiction became. We all became collectively chained by canon. Plots became more streamlined, and frankly dull. The imagination just disappeared. It felt like every second fic was basically "Naruto has a bloodline" and after some very energetic academy time and wave mission the story disappears into the abyss of dead fanfics. I'm just saying, if fanfics rose up from the grave, kancolle style, because of grudges against their authors, we'd have a shitload of underdeveloped Narutos with all sorts of weird bloodlines.

Hell, until Dreaming of Sunshine came along, Self Inserts were just about done. Imagine that for a second. That the most self indulgent type of fanfiction ever, the one everyone at least imagines writing, was an endangered species! And DoS was one of the more canon restricted fics ever, carefully plotting out canon while having long introspective monologues. It was a wild time.

The crossovers and smut are a different topic entirely. I've not forgotten those, but not really something a random Tumblr post can touch reasonably well.

We have Boruto now, love it or hate it. And personally I hate it, though I don't begrudge those who don't. My personal issues stem from how they did the original characters dirty. In a Doylist sense, I understand why, considering that if the older generation was the terrifyingly competent bunch they had become, then Boruto would by necessity end up as slice of life with chakra. But the way they completely twisted their characterisation was just sad. That scene where those rookie nine jump in like chumps and get stomped in between frames? Who wrote that shit? And why?

And worst of all, Shino has a toaster of all things for a mask!

In the OG naruto series, the older generation then was shown as impressive people of their own. There was respect there. Anyone remember the Allied Moms? The younger generation had come up to the fore because they had grown into splendid shinobi, children who had grown to surpass their parents, not because their parents had become nerfed. Why does Boruto need to make the characters we love incompetent to make the new generation look better? But I digress

Naruto now is a different beast. It's had time to settle in, mature as a series. The sequel has made things different, but the fanfiction still exists online, showing a side of the fandom that saw it evolve. In the forgotten depths of the interweb are splendid stories of the past, prose written by dedicated and talented fans who crafted amazing tales. Who remembers those days? Who remembers those fics? Do we? Do their authors?

I'll still read Naruto fanfiction. It's a good chunk of my life I've invested there. Call it sunk cost fallacy if you must. But some part of me misses a different era, when Naruto was the frontier, and everyday was a new fanfic, a new adventure.

[son1c]

Talking in your asks about Sonic Prime stuff repeatedly made me wanna show you my own fanmade shatterverse (Violet Hill Zone) but I felt like it'd be weird to just come on here and dump a bunch of things on you so instead I decided to draw Prism with my blue bunch of energy Cicada (aka the Sonic of my shatterverse)

Correct me if I'm wrong here but I imagine that even though Prism is trauma free, he's still a shy boi, so Cicada's massive amount of energy catches him off guard hehe-

To tell ya about Cicada, they're very much the hyperactive bit of Sonic, very energetic, loud, rambles a lot, very neurodivergent out of 10. I debated trying to be secretive about what the deal with Violet Hill is but nah. So basically I got very inspired by New Yoke/Yolk City and went for that "What if Sonic wasn't there" theme but replace Sonic with Shadow and replace the winning party being Eggman/The Chaos Council with it now being The Black Arms. So basically Cicada's morals are rather screwy cause of the Black Arms making them one of their own, they do that Sonic thing of "doing what they think is right" but what they think is right is uh. Biased-

Suffice to say, I think Prism would get along well enough with Cicada at first but then he finds out all that and uh. Sorry Cicada I gotta take you down to protect Nine and make sure you aliens don't swipe in to take New Yoke as well after he brings down The Chaos Council </3

Also two notes for the folks at home

> Cicada's pronouns are they/them

> Plz don't ship Cicada w/ Prism or any other Shadow, they already have a non-Shadow partner in their own dimension that they are very loyal too (part of why they're morally grey at best-)

Here take this Cicada ref image for the road, I'll get out of your hair now-

OMG SCENE SONIC IS SO HUGE BRAIN... if we can have nine inch tails then we should also get scene sonic!!!!!!!!!!!! i love the jacket and the pink accents you gave them so much wow <333 cicada is a sick name too wtf

i think the lore you made for them is really cool!!! + i think them being enemies with prism would be so awesome... the role reversal is so tasty fr

TYSM for drawing prism btw omggg i LOVE how he looks in your style!!! the fluff especially is so <3

[cgsf]

Men's Hockey (RPF) fanfiction recs:

Travis Konecny/Nolan Patrick

"how to cherish your own shadow" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 15,525 | Nolan thinks about praying. He thinks about TK, how good it's been to have him here, how easily they move around each other. He thinks about the stretch of days ahead of him once TK heads home. TK looks over and smiles, soft and crooked, and Nolan imagines leaning in to kiss him, pressing their bodies together. He smiles back.

"an illicit divide" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 2,851 | TK unbuttons his shirt, opens his belt. He turns around and Patty's still standing in the doorway, a shoulder against the frame. "You coming over?" "Can't," Patty says, and drags his socked foot along the threshold between their rooms. "Against the rules."

"but i pinky promise i'll try" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 12,152 | Nolan comes across one guy, just a scant two miles away, who actually has his face in his profile picture, which is a refreshing change. He’s cute, longish dark hair with a sneaky smile, and his name is Travis. Nolan has never started a conversation with anyone before, but again: antsy and horny.

"how winning is done" 🔒 (M) by jolach | 8,823 | Travis isn’t buying it. “Nah,” he says. “You’re not good.” He sees Patty whip his head around, ready to start shit, which normally Travis would be into, but– “You’re fucking...” he searches for a word, “awesome.” “Trav–” “You were a fucking monster out there tonight, that call was bullshit–” “Oh my God–” “You’re better at COD than me, I’ll never repeat that–” “–you don’t have to, we both know–” “You’re a goddamn smokeshow, you bagged a fucking NHL captain without even trying–” “Jesus fucking Christ,” Pat says.

"hear the river say your name" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 2,481 | "Howdy's got plans, so." Pat says it like it's a whole explanation, low and easy. It's been a while since they've been in the same room, but the way they talk to each other, the half sentences and shorthand, it's all still there. They're good to go and Pat's leaving it up to him.

"teach me how to cry" 🔒 (NR) by notthequiettype | 693 | TK knows the second he hits the ice his season's done.

"Combative" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 3,517 | "You know you could just fuck me without setting weird little benchmarks for yourself." "Yeah, but like, if I don't have a goal, how do I get better?"

"when i see your light shine" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 4,700 | Patty says, "Hey" and TK pulls him into a hug, lets himself hang on slightly longer than is chill. Patty just spreads his big hand out between TK's shoulderblades and holds on back. When they pull back TK says, "What the fuck are you doing here?"

"this will be our year" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 4,380 | When TK turns back around, there's a tall, handsome guy leaning on his elbow on the bar, two fingers rubbing at his temple under his shaggy hair. "What can I get you?" "What's the least annoying thing to order?" "For real or like how people are always asking bartenders what they like to make?" The corner of the guy's mouth twitches a little. The tops of his cheeks are flushed. "For real."

"absolute ultimate" 🔒 (E) by heroics | 4,669 | It’s a kind of ritual, now, that Travis and Pat spend at least the first night of every road trip at the hotel, bickering over the Discovery Channel.

"dial this lover’s heartache" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 5,219 | TK hits Pat, 21, 7km away and pauses, mostly to size-up the bass hanging from his hand in his profile photo. TK swipes right because he likes Pat's wide, open-mouthed smile, like he's in the middle of a laugh, and the soft curve of belly sitting at his waistband in another shot. TK's not expecting the match to pop and it startles him into dropping his phone on the counter.

"just like this" 🔒 (E) by jesuisgrace | 1,144 | TK plays beautifully. He knows they should wait, but when TK rips his helmet off after the game and flips his disgusting, sweaty hair back, he wants to eat him alive.

"Slow and low" 🔒 (E) by bitter_leaf | 10,451 | “You really gave that girl a lap dance, eh?” “I fucking said I did, didn’t I—” Travis starts, irritated, because he just told Patty not half an hour ago that he did and— his stomach drops through the floor. Oh fuck. Oh shit. Oh no. No no no.

"take down some summer time" 🔒 (T) by manybumblebees | 2,507 | Summer is lake days and fishing and coolers full of beer, the boat kicking up spray in its wake, and Nolan coming to stand next to him on the deck in his too-short shorts, holding his forearm next to TK’s and complaining about his Irish skin, which burns and freckles but never tans.

"it's hard to look right at you (so here's my number)"🔒 (E) by backseats | 2,914 | “Why’d you, like…” Trav tries to kick his brain back into conversation-mode, momentarily distracted by the way Patty’s flushed all the way past his throat, down to the divot of his collarbone. “Why’d you call me, man?”

"Motivation" 🔒 (E) by connectknee | 4,696 | Kevin knows when to back off, the article said. He knows just when to shut up and leave Patty alone, something Travis has never known how to do.

"Strange Torpedo" 🔒 (E) by connectknee | 31,270 |In which TK is the unconventional first-grade teacher in charge of Nolan’s niece, and Nolan is trying to figure out what to do with his life after crashing out of hockey.

"Dead reckoning" 🔒 (E) by murkya | 10,768 | Patty came over after lunch, one eye hecticly red and his jaw occasionally grinding about as if something was wound too tight inside and he was stuck on trying to work it free.

"History, and other forms of strife" 🔒 (M) by murkya | 16,925 | Summer of ‘26, Nolan got traded to the Flyers. That was fine, just great. Shit happens.

"don't let me fall behind" 🔒 (T) by growlery writes | 2,187 | It happens quickly, too quickly, but this is how it ends: the guy is on the ground. The guy isn’t moving. Nolan is safe. There’s a knife in Travis’s side. Nolan is safe.

"keep it on a high note" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 3,915 | Nolan has never been a particularly tactile person except for with the people he's been closest too. Nobody's expanded those boundaries like TK and Nolan likes the ease of it, that he has someone around all the time who he likes to be close to.

"hold on to your aftertaste" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 8,305 | Kevin stops him at the door. "You are my beautiful, gay, virgin friend. And we are going to go take care of the one part of that description that's bothering you." It's strangely heartening and Nolan follows him in.

"Cheetle" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 7,061 | Nolan made Travis kind of stupid in all these strange, inarticulable ways that didn't really have anything to do with how smart Travis wasn't, but instead were about like, how he felt.

"see you in the depths" 🔒 (E) by eversincewefellapart | 6,718 | "You're a virgin?" TK repeats incredulously.

"my heart is thrilled by the still of your hand" 🔒 (E) by callabang & manybumblebees | 3,139 | Patty tries a lot of shit to help with his migraines, but TK still isn't expecting to hear that he’s doing a “chastity cleanse” because Tazer said it would help him to “reset his mind.”

"save your first and last dance for me" 🔒 (E) by manybumblebees | 21,374 | They're several hours, a slow dance, and too many bright orange shots that taste of cinnamon and paint thinner into their joke date to G's wedding when TK looks up at Nolan and says, "Marry me." And that's just their first wedding of the summer.

"play with fire till your fingers burn" 🔒 (T) by manybumblebees | 6,048 | Nolan goes through his first NHL camp knowing three things about the guy in the next stall: 1. He talks a lot. 2. He likes to fish. 3. The ducks in his tattoo are named after the Ninja Turtles.

"port stanley is for lovers" 🔒 (T) by manybumblebees | 7,518 | “Imagine–” Nolan chokes out, trying to stop laughing long enough not to totally butcher the delivery on this. “Bro, imagine making a whole town think we’re hooking up because you couldn’t shut up about me.”

"i'm dying, i'm dying to touch" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 2,023 | Patty won't look at him. He's not paying any attention to TK, sitting there shooting the shit with Raff like TK doesn't even fucking exist. Fuck it. Fuck him. Fuck this.

"like home" 🔒 (T) by anonymous | 4,595 | The entire season feels like it’s going on in the next room, like Nolan’s watching it through a one-way mirror. Him on one side, hockey on the other. And then it stops, the whole season, the structure he's been clawing himself along and against, and... It's not a good week.

"if you leave the light on" 🔒 (M) by countthestars | 7,753 | “Do you really want me to come to Winnipeg?” TK doesn’t mean to blurt it out, but he’s not good at being subtle or holding back or thinking through any of the possible terrible consequences for his actions before he’s already done them, so. The question’s just. Out there. Ball in Patty’s court.

"the new three's company" 🔒 (M) by blaahaj | 3,000 | There are probably better ways to seduce your teammate than asking him to have a threesome with you, but this is working out alright for Travis.

"let's get drunk, i’ll pour my heart out through my mouth" 🔒 (M) by anonymous | 7,139 | Holy fuck, did he pick someone up last night? Travis isn’t in the habit of waking up with strangers, not really, but at least he’s in his own bedroom, that doesn’t— Wait. He knows those shoes.

"a line that we can just go cross" 🔒 (M) by whiskey_in_tea | 3,266 | Travis thinks about when he chipped his own tooth: how it felt to run his tongue over the unfamiliar jagged edge of it, over and over and over again. That’s the only reason he got it fixed, is because he cut his tongue on it, worrying at it, and that seemed unnecessary. That seemed, like, bad. He imagines saying to Pats, I’m worried about your tongue.

"I'm Your Wreck" 🔒 (M) by whiskey_in_tea | 7,126 | “If I was gonna,” Nolan says. “With a guy. Why would it be you?” “Because you love me,” Travis says, smug, shit-eating grin on that ratfucker’s face as he walks over to where Nolan’s sitting on the bed. Nolan tries desperately to trace how this night got so out of control so quickly and comes up with only: this is what happens when you make friends with the craziest person on your crazy-ass team.

"wild thoughts" 🔒 (M) by whiskey_in_tea | 6,996 | Nolan watches Travis’ hands, browned from the summer, scarred by fishing hooks and trigger pulls and ice burns and god knows what else, as they finish putting dinner on its plate. That’s the thing about Travis: he understands how to make the life he wants for himself. He’s not stupid, except about the things he’s fucking stupid about.

"working for it all the time" 🔒 (E) by whiskey_in_tea | 8,105 | It’s just, like, Travis thinks, as Patty lets go of his wrists and they walk inside together, Patty saying something about dinner plans. With other guys, there’s this static zone between them. Travis doesn’t think about it because there’s nothing to think about. But with Patty… it could happen. Just technically. It is possible. The door is open, he thinks, for the possibility of something. Not that he wants something to happen. But Travis has to admit that he thinks about it. He does.

"Surveilled" 🔒 (M) by notthequiettype | 639 | The thing about TK is that he doesn't lack impulse control; it’s that his impulse control was getting in the way of his life, so he just kind of learned to suppress it.

"Horseshoe Lake" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype | 5,386 | "So, what, you just came over in the middle of the night to like, end our lifelong friendship?"

"Eye to Eye" 🔒 (M) by canary | 4,077 | Five times TK asks Nolan to talk about it, and one time he doesn’t.

"never have i ever" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 5,653 | “Never have I ever kissed a guy,” he said, without really thinking about it. Nolan didn’t respond right away, and Travis realized about five seconds too late that that was probably a really weird thing to say.

"same building, different views" 🔒 (E) by atswimtwobros | 5,636 | Patty’s not always easy to read but Travis can tell that he hates this, being held down while Travis just looks at him. He can feel Patty’s pulse thumping in his wrists.

"haven't left your bed since" 🔒 (E) by heroics | 6,002 | "So, is it a rule that all bassists have to be really stoic and hot?" Travis asks.

"second sun came past the glass" 🔒 (E) by heroics | 3,614 | When TK glances at him across the elevator, Nolan leans against the wall and lets himself stare back. They start going up, agonizingly slow, dinging past each level. He really hopes nobody else comes in.

"headed your way with the devil on my fucking shoulder" 🔒 (E) by eversincewefellapart | 5,434 | They've been rooming since September and TK had tried valiantly, in the beginning, to strike up a friendship. When that seemed impossible, he attempted to go for a casual acquaintanceship at the very least. But Nolan consistently and coldly turned his advances down each time, shrugging into his big purple and yellow Laurier sweaters with his snapback pulled low over his eyes. TK has still never seen him hang out with anyone. He apparently runs a one-man show.

"only demons come to mind" 🔒 (T) by manybumblebees | 3,727 | Next to Nolan, TK’s slamming his gear around and swearing, and that, too, is becoming routine.

"sunlight on our clean clothes" 🔒 (E) by sarcangel | 19,923 | “Turns out I have a thing for centers,” Travis started. It came out pretty good, just a little wobble. “Or, um. Mostly one center. A center. Like, 6’2”, born in Winnipeg. Virgo. Likes cabins, dogs, weird music with violins and shit—”

"great expectations" 🔒 (E) by atswimtwobros | 5,287 | It's starting to give Travis a little bit of a complex, is all. or: the small dick fic.

"Close ain't close enough" 🔒 (E) by bitter_leaf | 33,590 | They’ve only got three nights left before they head back to Philly, training camp starting up a little over a week after that. With a heavy heart, Travis realises that he’s gonna head back home and have to deal with this same stupid flickering torch that he’s been carrying since Patty got put on long term IR that just will not go out, no matter how much he tries—and fails—to ignore it.

"Call me out (bring you home)" 🔒 (M) by bitter_leaf | 19,319 | Nolan’s gaze flickers periodically to the rear-view mirror as he barrels down the highway, one shaky hand shoved under his thigh, the other slung over the wheel. The road is quiet now that he's clear of the city but he can’t bear the thought of getting pulled over and having to roll his window down for some bored traffic cop, tell him he’s heading across provincial borders in the middle of a pandemic to get Manitoba’s favourite son to rail the existential angst out of him.

"break my bones" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 3,387 | Nolan’s been here enough times that he heads straight to the counter. He does a double-take when he sees the new barista, then immediately kicks himself for being obvious. It takes a surprising amount of concentration to order coffee while acting like he's never gotten off to videos of the guy getting fucked to within an inch of his life.

"pictures of success" 🔒 (E) by whiskey_in_tea | 16,171 | “The trick,” Travis is saying, “is to get past where the waves are breaking.” He gestures to where the water is rising like a wall in front of them. “See how it comes up and up, then it starts falling in on itself?” The ocean crumbles, collapses, sprays them with spume. It seems angry. What’s it so angry about?

"all candor and style in the crook of your smile" 🔒 (M) by p3trichor | 12,031 | It’s a photo of Nolan on his knees with someones’ fingers in his mouth, lips slick with spit. Travis flicks by it almost too fast and he’s only got seconds to decide if he wants to screenshot it, if he wants to just give up the ghost right then and there.

"but your heart got teeth" 🔒 (M) by countthestars | 6,619 | Patty’s gonna wolf out. Travis has never seen him do it before.

"i saw you in the water" 🔒 (E) by LouLa | 24,944 | “Why are you always collecting my garbage like a weird, violent crow?” Nolan asks, bewildered. Travis doesn’t have an answer for that, he just shoves at Nolan’s face instead.

"Nothing to Prove" 🔒 (E) by canary | 42,342 | Nolan picked a college based on two criteria. One: That it didn’t have a hockey program. Two: That it was in some random corner of the southern USA, where the air was thick enough to bite, and football was the only sport anyone talked about in October. He should have known his dumb ass was still going to fuck it up.

"Sugar Honey" 🔒 (T) by canary | 3,904 | TK had always liked color. TK had always liked Patty. TK had always liked it when Patty smiled, and it seemed like he smiled all the fucking time in Winnipeg.

"How the Future Knew" 🔒 (E) by canary | 63,728 | It had been some stupid, throwaway picture from the gym. He’d been shirtless, taken a selfie in the mirror between sets. Nolan hadn’t been thinking about it, really, just like, oh, my abs look pretty good for this late in the season, and he’d thrown it on the gram. It had made some horny Canadian’s “boys next door thirst trap compilation” post on Tumblr. Nolan hadn’t heard of Tumblr before but apparently it was a thing. He’d gotten like, thirty DMs about it.

"the space between your words" 🔒 (E) by TheNorthRemembers | 18,189 | Travis visits Nolan during the offseason and starts spiralling into his insecurities after being told by Nolan's sister that she doesn't like him.

"Made of Glass" 🔒 (M) by makeit_takeit | 14,689 | Inside the locker room it’s pure chaos, noise and people and Nolan immediately feels overwhelmed by the sheer volume of it all, both literal and metaphorical. His heart lurches and his gut tells him immediately, this is a bad idea, and you don’t belong here.

"Things We Missed" 🔒 (T) by makeit_takeit | 4,622 | It was literally, unquestionably, like - the dumbest thing he’s ever done, hooking up with Hallsy. Because Nolan is very - . Like, extremely, super, totally, literal-hours-of-his-life-lost-to-conversations-on-this-topic aware, that Travis Konecny is mad jealous of Taylor Hall.

"Last Ones Standing" 🔒 (E) by makeit_takeit | 22,772 | At the bottom of the ad there’s a link, and Travis finds his finger hovering over the screen, lip still caught between his teeth. “I mean,” he says very reasonably, speaking out loud to his empty apartment like some sort of possibly-crazy person, “just applying doesn’t mean anything. Maybe I just fill it out, and see what happens. It’s not like I’m really gonna get picked to be on TV, come on.”

"Just Getting Started" 🔒 (E) by canary | 10,719 | Several things clicked into place. “Are you trying to court me with Bud Lite Lime?” Nolan asked in disbelief. “Dunno,” Travis said, with his crooked smile. “Is it working?”

"body's in trouble" 🔒 (E) by cloudsandpassingevents | 55,915 | “I don’t know,” Nolan finally mumbles. “I’m not, like, trying to – ” the rest of the sentence gets stuck in his throat. He takes a sip of tea to force it back down. “Like. I wouldn’t do anything drastic. But, like.” He gestures vaguely at the air between them. “If you had a bike that was broken, you wouldn’t just keep it around anymore, you know? Like, it’d just be useless. You’d throw it away. So, like, if your body can’t do stuff that it’s supposed to be able to do, then…” he trails off, chewing on the corner of his lip. “What’s the point, you know,” he finally finishes.

"when the night falls" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 16,519 | In which Travis is strangely fascinated by the moody guy who keeps showing up at his coffee shop right as he’s closing. Well. The dude is hot. It’s not that complicated, actually.

"River for the Sea" 🔒 (E) by LoveLeah | 39,152 | It’s not that Nolan’s, like, hugely fucking into Travis. He literally barely knows him, but obviously he’s hot, tan and athletic with nice hair and pretty eyes and this dark tattoo just dipping out from under the sleeve of his t-shirt, wrapping around the thick muscle of his bicep.

"Bathe with You in the Sea" 🔒 (M) by LoveLeah | 2,549 | “Chase told us something,” his mom says. Travis' body feels fire hot under his parka, sweaty and closed in. “He says he thinks you didn’t come because--Travis, he says you told him you were gay.”

"Breathing Room" 🔒 (E) by makeit_takeit | 16,149 | “I dunno, dude.” Travis chews on the inside of his cheek, rubs his hand over the whiskers on his chin to feel them bend and slide and prickle under his fingers. “You ever just get tired of being in the city all the time? Just seeing like – airport, hotel, arena, bus, airport, and that’s it?”

"faith between our teeth" 🔒 (E) by waytoobright | 10,602 | For Travis, it feels like home. He knows the streets up and down every block, and he’s been working at his family friend’s hot dog stand since he turned fourteen and was legally allowed to work in the state of New Jersey. He’s got friends who work at other restaurants and shops down the boardwalk and everyone still comes back every summer. They all come rolling into town during the first few weeks of sun and sand, and then the summer really begins.

"The Strangest Trip" 🔒 (E) by makeit_takeit | 19,562 | Pat’s at the bar, back turned to the speeches. He looks like always: big, beautiful, perfect in his almost-pink-but-still-technically-taupe suit. Hair slicked back off his face, jaw clenched and trying hard to hide how much he doesn’t want to be here, gripping his wine glass a little too tight. Just looking at him, Travis can feel the almost desperate pull in his chest, the longing.

"Two Halves of a Whole Idiot" 🔒 (E) by littleconnections | 19,089 | Nolan's hair is getting long too, flicking into his eyes and Travis sits on the shore and watches, the pulling in his gut both familiar and not. What if I kiss him, he thinks.

"Friends Don't Look At Friends That Way" 🔒 (E) by Matriaya | 5,519 | Travis knows as soon as Sara suggests a threesome that he's gonna pick Patty. Obviously. Patty’s his best friend, and they see each other’s dicks like every fucking day at the rink, and he’s definitely walked in on Patty boning a chick before, so it will just be like that only… together.

"Hot House Grapes" 🔒 (E) by LoveLeah for Matriaya | 7,636 | Even after TK told him; after he found out he and TK both liked guys, he hadn't thought about TK as anything more than just TK. Like, he hadn't thought he wasn't hot, but he'd just never thought that much about it at all. Then they came back from the summer after their junior year, and Nolan walked into their dorm, and TK was sprawled out shirtless on the bottom bunk, dark tan and smiling, and Nolan took one look at him and was like: oh.

"Twice As Many Stars" 🔒 (E) by TheNorthRemembers | 230,251 | “Told you,” Nolan says, and it’s meant to be teasing but somehow his voice trails off into something softer at the look on Travis’ face. It’s not really surprise or shock like Nolan had expected, not entirely anyway. There’s disappointment there too, mixed with defiance and sadness. “You can’t save everyone.” The character's death screen is still showing, and it feels mocking in a way Nolan didn’t quite see coming. “I had to try, though,” Travis still says, unmoving for another second before he musters up a smile and presses the controller into Nolan’s hand. “You always gotta try.”

"in the name of being honest" 🔒 (E) by coastalhighway | 51,655 | From the moment the Flyers had stepped on the ice, Nolan had tried to catch TK’s eye, tried to make him fucking look at Nolan, but— The entire goddamn time. The entire goddamn game, TK never once met his eyes.

"Coming Undone" (E) by Linsky | 3,184 | For the record: Travis does hook up. A completely normal amount, even. He finds girls on Tinder and totally does go out with them. Just, that’s a lot of work, and sometimes he’s tired from hockey, and it just seems easier to stick to messaging. It’s still sort of like hooking up.

"latibule" (E) by wolver | 40,601 | "You're Nolan Patrick, right?" The guy presses on whether he gets an answer or not (he doesn't), "Bro, it's sweet we get to play together. You're fucking sick; your stick-handling skills are off the charts, my man, this is gonna be so sweet." Nolan can fucking feel the vibrations of Travis stifling a laugh, but of course Travis isn't going to throw him a rescue line like the fucker that he is. All Nolan can really do is stare blankly -- his first choice of words are highly inappropriate and he smothers them into an unintelligible mumble.

"before the wave hits" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 16,477 | It's not really a big deal, is the thing. It's just that Travis thinks it's kind of weird that they've been best friends for three years and he's never seen Patty's dick.

"let's get tangled up together" (E) by wolver | 3,236 | Patty's back. A slice in the life from training camp.

"he's kinda quiet (but his body ain’t)" 🔒 (E) by thestarsatnight | 2,956 | Nolan is looking at him and with soft, knowing eyes, because he knows exactly how taxing it is sometimes to manage anything past getting up, breathing, and going back to bed.

"Tazete Tazone" 🔒 (M) by soupbowlfulofsins | 7,464 | One drunk kiss does not a bromance make. So obviously, Travis and Nolan step up their bro-kissing game.

"So long, Honey" 🔒 (E) by TheNorthRemembers | 11,649 | Nolan and Travis have been friends since they've been kids and in love almost just as long. Nolan is a hockey player, but Travis isn't, but Nolan still comes home to him every off season.

"wouldn’t know where to start" 🔒 (M) by anonymous | 7,090 | Travis just keeps pressing, keeps touching Nolan the same way he always has, and waits for it to stop feeling normal. It never does.

"what we do when we stop thinkin" 🔒 (E) by Matriaya | 6,687 | Travis leans up and presses a kiss to Nolan’s cheek, right smack in the hollow of it, where the fuzz is starting to creep up. It’s no more than a second, lips on skin, barely a glance, but he can’t quite meet Nolan’s gaze as he pulls away. “For good luck!”

"Good For You" 🔒 (E) by TheNorthRemembers | 40,282 | Travis finds out that Nolan has a big dick and becomes obsessed with it, discovering some stuff about himself along the way. Nolan mostly just enjoys the ride.

"Does Anybody Know" 🔒 (E) by thestarsatnight | 3,509 | Kevin was beaming at him. “Better believe we’re gonna celebrate that hatty once this pandemic’s over, TikiBar.” “Sure, sure,” Travis said, bobbing his head. There was a lot he’d told these guys over the years, a lot that he’d shared with this team, but some things were just for him, even in the jumbled up excitement of his brain. Instead, he said, “Plenty of time for you to catch up, Hayesy,” and Kevin’s answering laugh was enough.

"Rattling Cages" (E) by LoveLeah | 48,562 | Nolan gets ditched, wears short-shorts, and tries to figure out his head. Travis buys a dildo, spends $2000 on Etsy, and makes a folder for all the Nolan pictures on his phone.

"worn but young" 🔒 (E) by grace | 28,525 | Somehow though, with Patty it’s all felt different so far, though he would never have guessed it would in a thousand years. Travis keeps looking back to check how far ahead he’s gotten and every time Patty is right there with him, pacing him quiet and calm. Acting like it’s normal to want the things with a friend that Travis wants, the constant closeness, acting like Travis isn’t bothering or taking from him at all. It makes Travis feel giddy inside, like bubbles fizzing.

"shines when the sunset shifts" 🔒 (E) by grace | 15,391 | Nolan feels all the things he’s been wanting to say to someone and can’t rise up and crowd in; a pressure, a weather system. I thought I was better. I’m not doing well. It is happening again. It will happen forever. Instead he says, “Does that hurt?”

"born to be crazy, born to be wild" 🔒 (E) by anonymous | 6,353 | Nolan was not throwing himself a pity party. Was he injured? Yes. Was he injured for the seven-millionth fucking time? Unfortunately. Had he succumbed, under the covers in the wee hours of the morning, to his weakest impulse, searching his name on Twitter? Also yes. Had that sent him into a shame spiral? Obviously.

"if you need me, i'm the same as i was" 🔒 (T) by donderwolk | 4,719 | TK clears his throat, tries to go for sultry again then, but it’s part of the bit now, a little in-joke between the two of them, says, “What are you wearing?”

"i miss this time, last year" 🔒 (M) by donderwolk | 18,048 | Travis calls him about two hours after the news drops, says nothing for a whole ten seconds, then comes out with just a, “Nolan.” It’s less a word, and more a sigh. A strange and desperate thing. They haven’t spoken in eight months.

"stuck in my head, heart, body" 🔒 (E) by donderwolk | 2,434 | God, what would TK even do if he just — showed up? Pretend, Nolan thinks. Knows, really. He’d pretend, at least for a little while, that Nolan standing on his doorstep in fucking Haddonfield unannounced and on Valentine’s Day was the most normal thing a guy could do.

"sing it in my sleep" (M) by fadeastride | 3,954 | It takes three days after leaving the bubble for Travis to check his phone. He deletes most of the texts unread, but there's one from Nolan that just says, "You should come see me."

"the most exciting thing I'd ever known" (T) by fadeastride | 3,072 | The first time Nolan starts to actually think about it, they're in Claude's backyard for some kind of "welcome spring" barbecue that's really an excuse to drink too much cheap beer and cook meat over a fire. Nolan's four, maybe five, beers in when he tells Travis that he's got the balance of one of those goats that walk sideways up mountains and that he could totally walk the fence like a balance beam. "You cannot," Travis says, smashing another bite of hamburger into his mouth.

"any thrill will do"🔒 (E) by hackysack | 8,372 | Pat copes with it the same way he’s been coping with every other part of the Philadelphia break-up: he goes on Grindr.

"hold (me) still" 🔒 (E) by notthequiettype & solarperigee | 3,343 | Nolan watches out of the corner of his eye as TK gets more and more jittery, before he finally springs to his feet, presses a kiss to Nolan's cheek, and announces, “I've gotta go jerk it so I'm not sitting here with a boner all game, 'kay?” Nolan doesn't know what drives him to say it, but the words are out before he can stop to think about them. “You can do it here, if you're quick about it.”

"occupying space" 🔒 (E) by toxica939 | 4,278 | Nolan loves him. The thought’s like a bruise. Something better left to poke at later, press down on, see if it hurts.

"I Wish That It Was Easy" 🔒 (E) by littleconnections | 10,393 | Getting stuck in a time loop has never made anyone realise their feelings any quicker.

"Someone Else's Solid Ground" (E) by Linsky | 21,757 | Nolan’s body has never been his friend.

••••••

That's 100!

[lazyrants]

The Laziest Town (prod 122)

(From now on, all screenshots in these reviews are taken BY ME.)

Original airdate: June 6, 2005

Story by Magnus Scheving

Written by Noah Zachary, Cole Louie, Magnus Scheving

Directed by Raymond P. Le Gue, Magnus Scheving

Executive producers - Magnus Scheving, Ragnheidur Melsted, Raymond P. Le Gue, Mark Read, Brown Johnson, Kay Wilson Stallings

Starring Magnus Scheving, Stefan Karl Steffanson, Julianna Rose Mauriello

Puppeteers - Ronald Binion, Gudmondor Thor Karason, Jodi Eichelberger, David Matthew Feldman, Julie Westwood, Amanda Maddock, Sarah Burgess

The Laziest Town - an episode of LazyTown I haven't watched in about two or three years. I remember a lot, but is it really the same now?

The episode begins with Sportacus having his breakfast. Knowing him, it's not normal. He grabs a ping pong paddle. A ping pong game for breakfast..? Ew. He grabs a banana and starts peeling it and eating it like a normal person.. nah, joking.

He slices the banana (not peeled) in midair with the ping pong paddle, drops to the floor and catches all the slices in his mouth. I know he's my favourite character, but come on. That's just weird, dude.

Sportacus decides he hasn't had enough, so he wants some apples. But his supply has run out, so he decides to go get an apple. Now instead of just riding to town, doing a somersault frontflip and grabbing onto an apple (or apple tree), he ties his feet in a rope and attaches the magnet to the metal part of his door and LITERALLY DIVES to an apple tree.

Then he flips back to his ship. Honestly pretty complicated and not needed, but admit it, it was awesome.. and about a million times cooler then catching banana slices in your mouth while having a potential stroke on the floor.

Milford is in his office, checking his to-do list - polishing his shoes, writing a new speech, checking the energy meter, eating the ba na na -CHECKING THE ENERGY METER? So, he goes to the energy meter to see where the ball marking how energetic the kids are is. And it's on the bottom.

It turns out Robbie is in a 'disguise' (literally wearing his normal clothes.. with a mustache) and is giving out TRIPLE-scoop ice creams.. for a penny. (Penny Pestella reference??!1!!!1?) It is a very good plan. Milford literally asks 'WHY AREN'T THE CHILDREN PLAYING???' as if they're obliged to (LOL) and calls help from Sportacus.

Milford thinks he is a failure of a mayor, but Sportacus tells him it's okay to eat ice cream sometimes. Then Milford elaborates further by bringing him to the office. Sportacus gives the kids some apples to energize, and they look all smiley and ready to do anything! After one SINGLE bite.

So, they go to the Mayor's office and see the energy meter at 0, and if they don't amp it up to 100 by 5 p.m they'll be named 'The Laziest Town on Earth'! If you think about it, if they did even get the ball to 75, there'd be at least one town lazier then them.. but nevermind. It's a kids show. So Sportacus runs on the spot while eating his apple and gets it up to 5.

Then he stops running and it's back down to zero percent. So the kids and Sportacus promise Milford that they'll keep moving and the plan is great until Milford announces everyone must move. Robbie at least has the decency to move sometimes (he's more active then he thinks he is) and Bessie gets Milford to do everything for her. So, Bessie, a protagonist in this show.. is being lazy, which is exactly what the main antagonist is doing.

Sportacus tells the kids to meet him on the sports field in five minutes and to run as fast as they can.. Ziggy then forgets why he has to run - so the energy meter goes up. Sometimes, I just don't know about that boy.

Robbie's world has fallen as he tries offering the kids more ice-cream cones, but they all decline... Ziggy, however declines too, but it takes him about 10 seconds to come up with the strength to say 'Maybe Later'. What a sigma! No, I unironically do not that say that word on a daily basis.

Robbie is shocked and he himself says 'WHAT THE SIGMA?'.. nah just joking. He does say 'WHAT?!' though. So Milford is busy trying his best to explain what's going on to Bessie, but of course, the annoying whiny woman she is, she starts talking about how she doesn't have any clothes to wear.

Sportacus has taken the super spinner from the airship (we get to see him use it again in Sportacus on the Move!) The first move is jump rope (background music from Superhero Moves CD), and in the office, the ball on the energy meter is up to 5. I'm surprised with a dude like Sportacus it's not at 75 already.

Milford is lifting weights (he's the mayor AND he can exercise, what a dude!) while Bessie is going on and on about her outfit. Then she discovers that Milford is sweating and is offended, accusing Milford of wanting Bessie to ruin her clothes. Fatness & fanciness, or Healthiness & happiness? Anyways, the kids have finished jumping, and the next move is pushups. Robbie is annoyed and he reports this to the mayor.

Satan- I mean, Bessie has came to pester Milford once more with different hor- CLOTHES and asks Milford to tell her what he honestly thinks. He tells her clothes don't matter while exercising.. and she is offended. Again. I HATE BESSIE. Now the energy meter is at twelve, and Robbie is in the mayor's office with a mustache. Then he takes it off and throws it away.

His excuse? He forgot to shave. Anyways, he tries to file a report but Milford asks if this can wait until later, and he tells them about the 'prize' they'll win if they don't get up and move. What does the laziest guy in town who hates moving do? Moves.

It backfires when Milford announces to Robbie he is moving the energy meter UP to 30. So he promises to himself to not blink, breathe and/or move a muscle.. until he sneezes.. and moves a lotta muscles.

So the meter goes up to 30 and the super spinner's next move is skiing. They all perform the song 'Go For It', and I cannot tell how much people have trashed this song. It's amazing! Who cares how Jellyana's voice sounds? She's still a pretty good singer, not to mention the fast-paced instrumental and lyrics! This song is awesome!

So, the energy meter hasn't reached 100 yet so Stephanie comes to the conclusion that one person isn't moving. Two, actually, but she tries to go convince Bessie to move. Bessie is relaxing in her clothes when Bessie gets a phone call from Milford and she answers it really fast.

Stephanie has the idea for Pixel to set up every phone booth in LazyTown and have Bessie run & pick them up. Pixel gets his computer. Now, from the plan, it sounds like there are about 30 phone booths in the town.. right? NUP. There are THREE. 3. TROIS.

Anyways, they start the plan and Bessie runs as fast as a human can make a puppet run. Milford calls the first phone and tells her she is doing wonderful. She is exhausted at the second phone (can relate) and Sportacus gives her a bottle of water.

So she keeps running, and she slows down again. But Sportacus throws her an apple (that hits Robbie in the head LOLZ!) but to really up it a notch, the Chariots of Fire theme song reprised by Mani Svavarrson plays as she runs to the last phone booth in slow motion. She's made it! Woohoo! I'm surprised she didn't get Milford to run for her, but she did it! Woop woot!

So, Sportacus has spinned the super spinner a buncha times to get multiple moves and do them all at the same time as fast as he can, but even he gets tired. They have failed. The meter is only up to 90. It's 5pm.

Until Robbie starts to dance and move frantically out of excitement that his plan to stay still so the meter doesn't reach 100 and Sportacus is so ashamed he leaves town.. and then the meter reaches 100. Three cheers for Mr. Rotten, and he's not enjoying a single second of it.

So he leaves to his lair and they sing Bing Bang. Robbie is so annoyed he promises he's never ever gonna move for the rest of his life until Robbie's phone rings and he picks it up about ten seconds. It turns out to be a wrong number. Then he rages.

I love this episode. Bessie saw herself as someone who was only good at answering the phones, but she was the person who got the energy meter up to 90.

10/10

[tinyhuman826]

Roses from Wyndon - Leon Fluff Imagine

You were a friend of Leon's family. You and him practically grew up together. He had just reached his dream of becoming Champion, and his family was hosting a barbecue to celebrate, so naturally, you were invited. You knock on the door, greeting his parents and his younger brother Hop. Leon gives you a big hug as you enter.

"Hey! Thanks for coming!" Leon said with a huge smile.

"Of course! Do you really think I'd skip out on celebrating you becoming CHAMPION??" You smile as well, patting him on the back.

"No, not really. But I'm still glad you came. Especially if I'll be moving to Wyndon tonight." He looked like he wanted to say more but was distracted by the smell of the food on the grill. The celebrations were pretty typical; you and his family ate dinner, exchanged praises and funny stories, and had a good time. At the end of the night, Leon pulls you aside and gives you a tight hug.

"I'm gonna miss you." You say sadly.

"Hey now, cheer up, it's not like you won't ever see me again. Besides, even if we can't visit each other as often you have my number." He tries to lighten your mood.

"Yeah, I know. It's just gonna be weird not having you around."

"I get that. It'll be weird for me, too. Charizard will definitely miss you. But hey, every time I have a match, I'll see about getting you some decent tickets, yeah?" He smiled, letting go of you.

"You better." You say half-jokingly. You two say your goodbyes, and you wave him off as he delays for Wyndon. You decide to head home yourself, laying down in bed and going to sleep.

Life is pretty normal over the next week, aside from not hanging out as much with Leon. But one day, you get a delivery. Weird. You didn't order anything. You open the door and see a bouquet of roses with a note attached.

"... Flowers? Who is sending me flowers?" You close the door, putting the flowers in a vase and opening the note.

'Dear (name),

I've been thinking about you a lot. I miss you way more than I thought I would. Life's really busy up here now that I'm the Champion. I really, really wanted to tell you this in person or at least over a call, but I won't have time for a while and it's going to keep eating away at me if I don't tell you. Look, I like you. Like... really, really like you. I think we should totally be together if you're okay with it. If not, that's completely fine, but yeah. Just let me know.

- Your Champion, Leon <;3'

You can't help but blush at the cute letter, squealing a little with joy. You pull out your phone, texting him a brief 'call me' and desperately waiting for his response. During the latest hours of the evening, your phone finally rings.

"Did you get my letter?"

"Yeah, I did. Thanks for the roses, by the way. They're beautiful."

"I thought you would like them. So uh... about the note... how do you feel about.. us?"

"I've been waiting for so long for you to say it! I was seriously debating on telling you myself!"

"So... you like me back? Like really?"

"Of course I do!" You can't see it, but judging by his lack of response, you assume he's smiling too hard to speak. "I guess I should've told you at the party, but I didn't want to do it in front of everyone."

"Nah, nah, it's okay, I get that. Wow...uh- do you want to meet up? Maybe grab a bite or something?"

"Like...a date?" You smile, hoping he'd say it was a date.

"Yeah... like a date."

"I would love to." You throw your free hand in the air, silently celebrating.

"Awesome! Well... I'll text you about it more tomorrow, but I know it's pretty close to the time you normally go to sleep, so I'll leave you be for now. Bye!"

"Bye Leon. Text you tomorrow." You smile and hang up the phone, laying on your bed. You find it hard to sleep now that you're so excited. So you just lay awake daydreaming about all the potential dates you two could go on, wondering what he'll say tomorrow.

[thedarkoneswithin]

Zodiac signs as parents

Aries 😈: Makes food ( Mac'N'cheese for example ) , follows recipe and instructions. End up burning down the house and the food looks like big slop. Don't let Aries make food; Ever!!!!!! UNDERSTAND??!... Depends if you have a death note then sure go ahead! You'll get food poisoning and die...OMG THIS IS disturbing; whatever.

Taurus😴: They say they are the calm parent who always has control but SOMEHOW... they always curse and yell in front of the kids. ( THE KIDS ARE UNDER 13.. LIKE DAMN BRO! ) They also happen to say they're positive... Nah! That's a lie right there... Also They're this:

Taurus: SCORPIO IM SLEEPING, SHUT UP AND ARGUE WITH THE KIDS LATER! ( Peaceful napping )

Gemini🖕: The Sports Mom/Dad who doesn't let their kids quit cause they're the captain of their kid's team.

Cancer😍❤️: The parent who makes great food and who has a generous and gentle parenting style. Basically the best dad/mom and most people wish they had Cancer as a parent.

Leo🔥🔥🔥: Leo is the parent who says; "Honey, I forgot the kids at the mall. Do you know where I put my keys?", in a very heavy British accent

Virgo 😑: The parent who forces their kid to do their homework or they ground them.

Libra🤣😭: The mom friend and gossips ALOT---) I MEAN ALOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Scorpio🥵: Parent who buys the best food, rents the best movies, cooks awesome food, probably rich and/or famous. Give their kids money and pays for their college/university.

Sagittarius😵🤭🤧: Annoys their kids, get messages and does yoga all the time. Keeps saying corny jokes and weird British quotes.

Capricorn😡🤮: Ha! Loser- I could of got A+ = Says that but dropped out of high school and kept getting D+ and C+.

Aquarius👺: Luxurious house with a pool and doesn't use it nor cleans it.

Pisces💀: You can smoke, you can drink, you can have sex but remember; use condoms. I don't want you to be pregnant( or get a girl pregnant ). Have fun at prom, Y/N!

[moinsbienquekaworu]

Obikin-fan!you made me question my whole view of their dynamic which... I've changed my mind. Seeing them as brothers is awesome, my desperate-for-brotherhood-6yo self totally bought into obi-wan's "you were like a brother to me" and fed onto this for years. But then you barged in with your romantic!obikin and I had to sit with my thoughts for a second cause my first reaction was "but Obi-Wan is too old for Anakin!!! he is an adult when he meets ani who isn't even a teen and..." and Padme is the same age as Obi-Wan and that never bothered me??? But then it's ✨️ canonical ✨️ and ✨️ straight ✨️ so it seems more acceptable? Nah I'm not buying this anymore, which means that I have no more arguments against the ship and ughhh but also yay... It's not that I'm diving right into it at the moment but damn I might

I can hear you chanting "one of us" as I'm typing this btw

One of us one of us one of us one of us

To be fair Obikin have an age difference of 16 years and Anidala have an age difference of 5 years so it's not exactly the same age range, and Padmé didn't contribute to raising him. Personally the way they interact once Anakin is older kind of makes me kind of like see past it (+ I really don't care about age gaps in fiction) but it's totally valid and fair to see it as purely platonic. The only thing that isn't valid is calling someone a pedophile and/or incestuous over characters who don't exist, but you're free to have your own vision of said characters and even think it's really kinda weird that some people are into them as romantic partners (and also personally I dislike people who downplay the importance of their relationship in the narrative and to each other)

The way I see it, the war changes their dynamic a lot: in ep2 Obi-Wan is responsible for Anakin, he's his master, and you can tell they're kind of struggling there because Anakin doesn't want to do what Obi-Wan says and Obi-Wan is kind of tired of his shit. That would make a relationship pretty iffy morally (not that it can't be hot honestly), but after Geonosis Anakin is knighted, he's not Obi-Wan's responsibility, and they have three years of fighting side by side as equals. That's a much better start for a romance, because they're on equal footing, and they spend a lot of time together doing ambiguously romantic things (I won't say "friends don't do that" because we know that's bullshit but like, they act in ways that can easily be interpreted as romantic, or that would generally be read as romantic without context).

The "you're like a father to me"/"you were my brother" lines I don't discard because they're really interesting but I see the romantic aspect of their relationship as kind of like - listen these two have really untangled lives! Obi-Wan was Anakin's kind of father figure but also his mentor, and Anakin was Obi-Wan's responsibility and his apprentice but also his brother, that's a lot of complex roles and a lot of facets to a relationship that we know is close - they fly in sync at the start of ep3, Obi-Wan knows what to say to get Anakin to cheer up in the elevator in ep2, they know each other, they mean a lot to each other, Anakin clearly doesn't care about having normal healthy relationships and Obi-Wan loves him more than anything he could ever do wrong (that's a quote from Andor but there's a reason it gets reused a lot for this ship), why not ALSO make them fuck & kiss y'know?

That said you don't have to jump on the ship immediately or at all! Personally I find them super compelling (and also extremely canonical if you look at all the stuff they share) but SW is so big that there's always something that's perfect for you, whatever that is. Anyway. I like them a normal amount.

[dancing-to-architecture]

12 of 1001

Today's album: The Mothers of Invention - Freak Out! (1966)

Shit yeah, folks, we got some Zappa today!

When it comes to the Mothers, i know Weasels Ripped My Flesh and We're Only In It For The Money, so i can't wait to get seriously fuckin WEIRD.

A quick Wikipedia search tells me that Freak Out! is:

•the debut Mothers (and therefore also Zappa) album,

•might be the first concept album,

•and also was the first time anybody released a double album for their debut.

Hungry Freaks, Daddy-

Okay, as much as i wanted Tracy Chapman's revolution a few days back, i want these Hungry Freaks around even more.

Florida should be filled with hungry freaks. That feels right and natural, unlike Mr America.

A killer start, and i love any song with prominent kazoo.

I Ain't Got No Heart-

Aro anthem or "free love, no strings" anthem? Hard to tell, could go either way. I guess it depends on how you look at it.

Who Are The Brain Police?-

Who ARE the brain police? Why are the brain police? Kill the cop in your head.

Chaotic instrumentation and lyrics that wouldn't be out of place on a Death Grips album, only Ride would be *way* harsher with it.

MORE KAZOO. I got a fever that can only be cured with plastic and a piece of wax.

Go Cry On Somebody Else's Shoulder-

Doo-wop "nah we should stay broken up" song. "Red House" from the other viewpoint.

I have to wonder if this song was an influence for Weird Al's "One More Minute", as they have some very similar bones.

Motherly Love-

The somewhat rarely-seen "know what? groupies are kinda fuckin awesome" rock song.

Kinda creepy, but I've seen/heard much worse.

How Could I Be Such a Fool?-

Another "she done me wrong" song. Okay. Not great, not terrible. Just okay.

Wowie Zowie-

And now a love song. I know this is the start of side 2, but the tone of the songs are giving me whiplash here. That said, who doesn't like a flash in the afternoon?

You Didn't Try To Call Me-

And another i still love you but you don't love me anymore song. Frank, my dude- they're pissed off about the groupies. Simple as that.

Any Way The Wind Blows-

Okay at this point, if this is a concept album, the concept is roughly the same as How I Met Your Mother, in that it's the story of how a guy ruined every single relationship he was in.

At any rate, an "i don't want YOU anymore, i got HER now!" song. Meh.

I like the instrumentation here, but this song kinda feels unnecessary with all the other songs on the album that are so similar in theme.

I'm Not Satisfied-

Lol, love that Zappa gutteral Yeah! in the intro. There's the Frank i know and love.

The lyrics are sadly relatable, but I'm the dude who sucks plus i got depression. (that was an achewood reference I'm actually doing pretty okay more often than not nowadays, esp. when i don't think about my governor existing)

You're Probably Wondering Why I'm Here-

This is more what i was expecting, coming from the other, later albums.

Hell yeah, kazoo SOLO. *Multiple* kazoo solos, even.

"Oh, you don't like our band? Cool, go fuck yourself. We might be weird, but you're fucking basic and boring as shit."

Trouble Every Day-

Change the TV references to Twitter references and you'll realize that, in the last 57 years, nothing has really fundamentally changed in any way.

This song could be released tomorrow and still be relevant to what's going on. Zappa knew from the beginning that America was sliding towards a fascist theocracy, and it really shows here.

Cops are still racist pricks actively beating the shit out of people (well, they put down the nightsticks and picked up ARs, but yeah.)

This nation is still inherently extremely racist.

And the media and all the out-of-touch fuckers in charge keep telling us "there's nothing we can do about it (unless you give us more money)!"

Help, I'm A Rock-

The return of the Weird.

I've heard this song's title as a punchline before, but this is my first time actually hearing the song, and it's exactly as weird as i was hoping it would be.

It's a drag being a rock. Think I would rather be the mayor.

Chaotic as hell. Also, i was glad i was wearing headphones when the orgasm noises appeared out of the noise. I can't even begin to imagine how much people of the time hated this.

It can't happen here. Everybody's safe and it can't happen here. No freaks for us and if can't happen here.

(It's happening here. It has been for years and it likely won't ever stop happening here.)

The Return Of The Son of Monster Magnet-

Suzy Creamcheese's first appearance in the discography. (So, until today, I legitimately always thought Suzy Creamcheese was like a late 60s porn star or something. Come to find out just now that it was just an inside joke started by Zappa that blew out of proportion. Today i learned..)

Decidedly the most experimental song on the album. The sounds of Space Madness.

Ooh, picked out a theremin during the space madness section. Fuck yeah.

The lyrics on Spotify have officially broken at this point. They simply do not know how to handle this song.

Space Madness has devolved into more orgasms and speaking in tongues. Yeah, i bet people in the late 60s either totally loved or vehemently hated this, depending on their usage of... substances. (Love me a good substance. Especially some cream cheese. Put it on a toasted bagel and I'm set.)

The last half of this song is the sheer insanity i had been waiting for.

So, for a guy who claimed to never do drugs, this album IS drugs. It's been interesting to see where Zappa et al started from, because it makes me appreciate the later stuff that much more. Thank the gods that Zappa decided to fully Embrace the Weird as he continued his career.

Not my favorite album of theirs, but I'm glad i finally got around to listening to it.

Favorite Track: While i really want to say Trouble Every Day, i have to say Help, I'm A Rock beat it by a hair. Might be unfair to Trouble, since the latter song is like 3 times longer and 5 times weirder, but Trouble Every Day just made me too sad on reflection to give it the top spot.

Least Favorite Track: You Didn't Try To Call Me. This song is already on the album in 2 different spots. The album is long enough, imo it really doesn't need a third song about the exact. same. idea.

[iyliss]

Saiou siblings for the character thingie~?

hehe thank you!! on my way to be way too long on these two (I love them).

Starting with Mizuchi:

First impression: That she's cool ? I mean she immediately looks so cool and badass it only hits how cool later.

Impression now: oh my GOD she's awesome. Miiko hacker girl that lives on a cave, do occult rituals and fortune telling and can also get in one of the tech industry giant server because?? she just does that. Also did you know she very very likely is supposed to represent the mathematical aspect of dimension travel in Cthulhu mythos? that "mathematician witch" is a thing that exist and she's that and that's just awesome. Also she has a whole giant evil ugly god of darkness as an ace. No one's doing it like her. She's perfect.

Favorite moment: When she tells Judai and Edo to leave the virtual world, Judai tells her to come with them and she's so shocked. And it just makes me insane like she truely didn't think "receiving help" was a possibility. It makes me sad. But also it explains everything about her.

Idea for a story: I need more Mizuchi fucking up the limit of space time and facing the deepest horrors of the universe through sheer data science and matrix calculation and love for her brother. I write that a little but i need more. She's perfect for dimensional math bullshit. Oh also I have this post-canon scene that is too fucked up to write but.... what if the light never lives and Mizuchi and Edo has to figure out if Saiou truly can't be saved and when it appears that no he can't, Mizuchi just. knows she has to get rid of the light at any cost even as the last wish to her life. (this is a charles d ward/thing on the doorstep moment that im obsessed with btw).

Unpopular opinion: The few times people talk about her but write her as Saiou's sweet kind gentle soft sister that he wants to protect... I mean yeah he wants to protect her but it very much goes both way and. Like. Come on. She blackmailed some guys to go beat up an old man, then kidnap two teenage kid as leverage to force another teenager to fight her. And she didn't exactly regret that, nor did she hesitate, NOR WAS SHE UNDER ANY FORM OF OUTSIDE CONTROL. She willingly chose violence and didn't doubt for a second it was the only way to get what she wants. Meanwhile Saiou cries when he has to use his power on someone else. When Saiou is in danger, she says "please return my gentle little brother". When Mizuchi is in danger he says "I don't know what to do without her". Like oh my god it's so important to me that Saiou is the sensible, soft-hearted one (the poet) and Mizuchi the analytical, goal-focused one (the mathematician). That's even why Mizuchi was immune to the light: she has an unwavering resolve and knows exactly what she wants.

Favorite relationship: Of course Saiou. of course I love these, even if they're not canonically twins they are SO anime twins-coded. They can't live without one another. "it's like losing half of my soul". They only had each other for so long and they can never be as close to anyone but each other. Insane insane. Actually I can't think of any other relationship cuz... Mizuchi is very non partnering aro to me? She's just not interested in people. The 5 second of fubuki bonding she had in tf3 was fun but like... Nah she just doesn't care that much.

Favorite headcanon: She's the actual gx mathematician. Misawa is a physician/chemist if you want idk idc he is NOT a mathematician. Mizuchi however? That girl taught herself everything about matrix, dimension reduction, data treatment and probably learn how to code her first regression on a random pc she fixed herself. She's a linux kinda statistician. Pirate girl. I can't project my CS degree on Saiou so it'll go to her.

Saiou:

First impression: i have the screen of my very, very first reaction to Saiou and it's "he's weird but pretty".

Impression now: AND I WAS SO RIGHT HES SO WEIRD AND SO PRETTY he's the most absolute strange weirdo in all of gx AND the most beautiful character ive ever seen!!!! He just has everything I could ever love I am perpetually in awe by the character he is. The deep social struggle, and identity mess too. How he's such a deeply sensible and weak person but he was forced to be cruel and heartless and it jsut!! hurts him!! and all the contrast, between his softness and monstruosity (perceived by others and himself), between his ability to manipulate and his will to understand and be understood. and the light is such an antagonist, it's fascinating, terrifying, light!Saiou is one of the best ygo villain imo the way he duels is just chilling! Meanwhile Saiou remains so cute and he's doing his best and god god god I love him ;w;

Favorite moment: like. every single second he is on screen? Is there a single Saiou Moment that isn't my favorite? He has such funny moments (when he plays the piano. terribly. when he sucks so bad at social interaction everyone flags him as dangerous when he technically did nothing actually dangerous. that kenzan scene. HE TOOK HIS SHOES OFF BECAUSE THATS THE POLITE THING TO DO AND THEN JUST SAT THERE AND WATCHED A TEENAGER SLEEP????? BECAUSE IT WAS LESS WEIRD THAN WAKING HIM UP TO HIM APPARENTLY??) but also very, very heartfelt one (like. that whole dialogue between Edo and Saiou. the hand holding, the finally expressing their feelings and the way Saiou slowly is unable to speak and can only whisper "Edo".....) scenes that are just fascinating (when he cries when asking Manjoume if he wants to follow him??? like wtf was that??? when the light punches the mirror "shattering" Saiou as well WTF WAS THAT??) and more and more and more

Idea for a story: I constantly have a million story in my brain about Saiou. he's just living there. Thinking of a fantasy AU based on the quest for the timebird comics book (not even sure they exist in english lol), with that specific type of french comics fantasy, where Judai and Saiou travels to fix the balance of light and darkness (and perhaps fucked up stuff follows). Re-thought how badly I want a vampire AU with a confession scene with DD. confession that fucks up the priest. As far as canon-leaning ideas uhh I do want to do more ed-sai childhood content, i just love to write sad kids being sad apparently. Also a post-canon with some universe alteration so that KC is ambiguously evil and tries to study the light through Saiou but it's not really a good thing, so Ryo who is also kinda studied helps Edo get Saiou out? I just want a bit of science themed horror in the gx universe about the Light.

Unpopular opinion: Every once in a while people acts like Saiou is truely evil and bad and all and yeah okay whatever Im not arguing with that. I actually am fairly chill with Saiou opinions cuz even when it's from people who only care about the surface level elements (villain) it's interesitng? Saiou is just. such a good villain too. however it really annoys me that some people think Edo or Judai hate Saiou at all. They want to help him so bad can't you read!!! People are just scared that Edo isn't emotionally closed off to anyone until [whoever they ship him with] they scared of how badly he loves Saiou. And also scared of how Judai is so nice to Saiou. Can't handle that the freak is loved. (also he's beautiful shut up).

Favorite relationship: You can put any character next to Saiou i'll love it. So like the fav list is long. Already talked about Mizuchi up there. Of course Edo is there too, their relationship is like. a really important part of season 2. And I truely love that they have this unhealthy, co-dependency element while genuinely loving each other and trying to be better for each other. And so many fun details! Like the height difference that only shines when Edo is so so protective of Saiou. And how Saiou is also protective of him in his own way. And the sad weird ambiguously gay childhood friendship they had (can't explain it you need to have a weird vaguely toxic ambiguously gay childhood friendship to get it). But also they're so cute and hold hands and make eternal friendship promises!! Also with s4 Judai like these two are. idk how to explain it beside the dynamic of two severely undiagnosed teenager meeting on rp forums and being each other's sole emotional support because no one else around them get it and also they don't ahve to face each other. No idea what the other looks like but they know the details of their trauma. "hey whats up can i vent" at 3 am kinda situation. (also they're both arospec to me and it's easier to build relationship with people who like. don't do that stuff). Also tf3 gave me three hints of Johan Saiou friendship and im so into this!! Just give him kinda weird friend that are attentive to his struggles and help him socialize in a safe way!! johan going "saiou's card are so cool when they turn around" im just ;w;;; about this. Also his dynamic with DD because I think about it a lot. I mean of course it's nothing like friendship or anything else ever but like..... the weird child that Knows and the man that is terrified of anyone Knowing... the desire for salvation and the fear of corruption... can't explain but yes i am obsessed about the saburov and clara pathologic if that helps. Last word on. light/saiou. because hm they had no business writing the evil posessing soulless entity that created a soul from Saiou's despair act like his toxic ex... forcing him then hitting him when he rebels then insulting him then trying to get him back by saying "you're nothing without me" kinda stuff... I just love when the possessing and the possessed kiss yknow.

Favorite headcanon: in what world does he have any understanding of gender and it is not a restrictive prison to him. "I tried to be normal and fit in but it still feels wrong" YEAH I KNOW i hate gender binary too!!! Also sending him a weird mix up of mental stuff no one can really tell apart (but im the most invested in the dissociative aspect. He has NO idea what time what day what space it is. anxiety too but that's beside the point). and the autism. and other stuff but that's for later. Also he's a huge horror fan and loves just. weird fiction and strange horror things. He has a massive book collection that is mostly old stuff he found in whatever condition.

[joytraveler]

Joy Traveler: Screen 5

(Sunday, August 9, 2015)

normalnancy: hi magic -*-MAGIC_*_ hi who are you Llord_Kuruku: Hope Bea shows up soon HNV: Geez, who even are all these people? anthony1998x: an1 here from cali say yo normalnancy: hi lord kurku normalnancy: hi hnv berd_snerglar: She's usually on by now wtf. GlockRoach: u think she got freaked out aroseahorseboy: nah, bea has enviable chill

Bea arrives at last, looking a little worn. "Son of a bee it's been kind of a crazy night but okay. All good now, thanks for waiting! Had a little drama in the hive"

"BEA YOU FORGOT TO FEED THE DOGS!" "...hang on.."

anthony1998x: wtf r your parents here??? HNV: Dude, she's a millennial, we ALL live with our parents. Llord_Kuruku: ohmygodareyoufuckingserious. bea you have to show us the dogs aroseahorseboy: doggiiiiies

"Okay! Ready, my swarm!" She returns. "No, no, get down! You got wet paws! Out! I need an actual studio for this or something instead of just my nerd room, don't I"

"Welcome once again to Press Bea, picking up with Joy Traveler, part 5, and things have been...weird. We had Box Baby 2 and learned more about the Spanunkos and I haven't gone any further.. yet. It's tempting but I want to plumb the mysteries of this machine with my hive by my side! No I'm not scared!"

normalnancy: hi bea DueyDecimal: This gets more awesome every episode you guys, seriously calm down and watch bug_snuggler: bea can you play some of the actual good games you have GlockRoach: Dude you gotta stop changing your name every time, pick one. pick that one. Syrupentine: Everyone calm down, Bea can play what she wants... which is going to be more Planet of Pisces, right??

"Well I was thinking, I'll pick one to start and then you guys can pick the next, seems to work out pretty well most of the time"

DueyDecimal: I like that. aroseahorseboy: buckle up buzzers

Screen 5 shows a pastoral scene with a sunny field, a swimming hole, and a tree with a tire swing! Seated in front are two children, a boy and a girl, holding hands with their backs to the camera. In the sky appear the names of the 12 games for this screen:

49: Berry Batty 50: Teddy Bear Ballet 51: Impact Crate 52: Pralines & Cream 53: Whack-O Golf 54: Planet of Pisces 2: For Super Players 55: Kaveman 56: Crosswalk 57: Whirlwind Football 58: Fuzzed 59: Cat Rate 60: Sunny Spring Mornings

aroseahorseboy: is... is that... Syrupentine: omg omg omg POP2!!! Llord_Kuruku: HOLY SHHIIIIIIIII HNV: It's a trap! Play the last one, that's got to be a fakeout!

"Ok I know what you guys are thinking, and it IS a weird order but I don't think that really means anything. Crosswalk just sounds dull but we've though that before.. Oh you know what's boring? Golf!"

Syrupentine: ...Golf. DueyDecimal: God has forsaken us. snug_buggler: guys we can leave til the boring is over. why u hate us bea?

"Remember what this game did to soccer? And cooking? And other sports? Cooking is a sport you can't tell me otherwise"

HNV: Oh shit, you know what shows up in sports games, right? Llord_Kuruku: ...Spanunko time? HNV: Totally Spanunko time!

"DANGIT, how could I forget. Sure they're evil undead abominations but who can resist the thrill of competition..."

DueyDecimal: And they barf evil tapeworms! aroseahorseboy: my my yes it would be a shame to ever forget that

[forbidden-creepypasta]

Window

15:32 JakeyJake22: Hey 15:32 SayWutUWant: Oh hey.. 15:33 JakeyJake22: i heard u found that robert guy 15:34 SayWutUWant: Yeah. It was pretty gruesome. Poor bastard. 15:34 JakeyJake22: so what was it like?? 15:34 SayWutUWant: You're asking me to relive that? 15:36 JakeyJake22: ...sorry dude. u dont have to if u dont wanna. 15:39 SayWutUWant: *sigh* 15:39 SayWutUWant: That's okay. If you want to know, I'll tell you. 15:40 JakeyJake22: haha awesome man. feel free to stop anytime 15:41 SayWutUWant: Well it was kind of weird.. 15:41 SayWutUWant: I just knocked on the door and he didn't answer. His car was there, so I used the key he gave me to get in... he could have been in trouble, you know? 15:42 JakeyJake22: you had a key to his house?? how did u know him? 15:42 SayWutUWant: He was my brother. Anyway, I found him in front of his computer chair, and well, he was just lifeless. 15:43 JakeyJake22: did u call the police?? 15:46 JakeyJake22: hello? 16:02 SayWutUWant: Back. Sorry, I got a call from my mom. Anyway, yeah I called the police. It took them like ten minutes to get there. 16:03 JakeyJake22: haha wb. do the police know what killed robert? 16:05 SayWutUWant: Well, they're saying "poison" but an officer I talked today said they honestly had no clue. The autopsy didn't help at all, apparently. 16:06 JakeyJake22: o shit. whaddya think it was? 16:07 SayWutUWant: How should I know? 16:09 JakeyJake22: sorry... 16:10 SayWutUWant: Nah it's cool man. You wanna know the weird part, though? 16:10 JakeyJake22: ?? 16:12 SayWutUWant: I looked at Robert's computer, and there was just this screen running. It was like, a really vague drawing of a guy in front of a house. And underneith him it said "Game Over" in really sketchy writing. 16:13 JakeyJake22: o shitttttt. 16:14 SayWutUWant: Yeah, well... the police checked it out, apparently it was a harmless flash game or something. 16:15 JakeyJake22: dude can u draw? 16:17 SayWutUWant: ...Yeah why? 16:18 JakeyJake22: draw what that game over screen looked like 16:18 SayWutUWant: ...Why? 16:19 JakeyJake22: cuz you did a horrible job describing it lol. 16:21 SayWutUWant: Sorry? Um, I guess it looked something like... 16:25 SayWutUWant:

16:28 JakeyJake22: oooo shitttt creepy man. i like ur artwork. 16:29 SayWutUWant: Haha.. you do? 16:30 JakeyJake22: no. 16:32 SayWutUWant: ...anyway. I played the game myself. 16:32 JakeyJake22: the 1 on robert's computer?!! really? 16:33 SayWutUWant: Yeah. It was pretty fun too. I beat it. 16:35 JakeyJake22: i wanna play! 16:36 SayWutUWant: You can play it here: [link omitted] 16:40 JakeyJake22: whoa this is cool. 16:41 SayWutUWant: I thought you'd like it. 16:43 JakeyJake22: kinda like mario but it's in the desert i guess? 16:45 SayWutUWant: I guess.

16:46 JakeyJake22: wtf lol 16:47 SayWutUWant: Just drawin'. It's fun man. 16:48 JakeyJake22: anyway im on lvl 6 of this game. its really hard 16:50 SayWutUWant: Yeah. There are only 10 levels but the last level is a boss, so.. 16:57 JakeyJake22: beat lvl 7! i almost died twice lol. the camera angles are really annoying. 16:59 SayWutUWant: It can't be helped.

17:00 JakeyJake22: lol looks like a painting. 17:21 JakeyJake22: FINALLY BEAT LVL 9!! is the boss fite hard? 17:22 JakeyJake22: hello?? 17:23 JakeyJake22: whatever ill just start the boss fight 17:23 JakeyJake22: why is my character just looking at the screen? 17:23 SayWutUWant: Hello.

------- And that's the end. Definitely not a shit-brix pasta, but whatever. I mostly did it because I felt like drawing/writing a pasta. The two combined to form this shit.

Credit to: Matt_Lol

[liopleurodean]

Season 12, Episode 5: The One You've Been Waiting For

If I'm right, then this IS the one I've been waiting for. I'm excited!

Rude.

Not a fan of the symbol, but nice

Oh boy

Wow.

No, I imagine he wouldn't

What the heck?

Whoa!

It's giving Raiders

Spooky

Dean, the last time you weren't hungry, you were a demon. And he remembered the pie!

Whoa. That's concerning

You absolute liar

There we go

Not even remotely

No one is as rich as Scrooge, but good comparison

Heh. Remember season 2 'antiquing'?

Dude.

Wow

Maybe something like that

The boat scene!

Dean, no!

No hand involved there

He's not a six year old

Dean...

That mouse was really slow

Dean.

What's that?

IT'S A SECRET BOOKCASE DOOR

With a swastika on it

Sam, seriously

Catering to Nazis

It's freaky

Wonderful.

I keep forgetting about them

Me too

I don't think there's usually that much talking

She's definitely nervous

Girl. Stop overthinking it

She knows something

Freaky

Uh oh

That was a conveniently placed fire escape

Fantastic

Oh yeah, Aaron! I didn't think we'd ever see him again

Awesome

Great question! Apparently, a pocketwatch

Oh no

Yeah, I think he saw it

Dude, it's like a reverse Blues Brothers! Dean finally gets to use Baby to chase a cop car!

Poor girl

Apparently not

Yikes

He's outnumbered

Pretty much

That's fair

Okay.

Haha, sucker

Okay, and?

Awesome

...wayward son? Oh man, I need to stop laughing. That wasn't funny

And so will they

Because Nazis are idiots

There's Hitler

Of course the Nazi kid would know about Harry Potter

Dean.

I guess so

I'm sorry, what do you think Hitler will do against the modern world? How is this supposed to play out? That plan sucks

Oh, I don't like that. I don't like that at all

Unfortunately not

Fantastic

They're looking for his relatives

It's possible, I guess

Yikes

Oh boy

Dude.

Pretty good sign

Poor girl

...if it makes you feel better, it's not your fault?

Oh no

...that was weird

Well, something kinda similar happened...

Yup

Not really, but it's an option

Inspiring!

No kidding

Oh, great

Poor girl

Yikes

Dang it, Ellie!

That was the absolute worst time to run

Awesome

Oh boy

That's just horrifying

Dang it, if they fly there's no way of telling where they went

That doesn't sound good

The first good thing he's done

Well, hi!

Great question

It'll have to be

Heh, I'll bet

Awesome

Interesting

I guess so

Not yet, Dean. Her time will come

It's okay, Dean

Heck yeah!

...he never wanted to just resurrect Hitler. He wanted to become him. That's horrifying

She won't last long

Whoa, that was smooth. They use weapons so much that I forget they can just. Snap a neck if they want to

Freaky

Ew, I do Not like that

That was not cool

There it is

This is just weird

He seems a little hysterical

Poor girl

And there it is

Time to waste some Nazis

Oh boy

I guess so

He was right to

This is why I love Dean

I love the phone case

Hitler on Twitter would be horrifying. Then again, what we've got already sucks

Yikes

There's no way she can shoot straight

I stand corrected

Shooting Nazis left and right

Do it, Dean!

Awesome

I love him. I love him so much. He's my little James Bond Barbie. "Heil this" I--

She definitely needs medical attention

HE KILLED HITLER

AWESOME

Never gonna hear the end of that

If only the world would believe him. He's right, though

That's all that matters

Nah

As fast as you can

Not too bad

Probably.

Yeah, I think Hitler is worse

Well, you've definitely got to try it

Abso-freaking-lutely

I'm sure that got old really fast. I, however, love it

Not even remotely