#NYPD sucks

[brewsir]

I want to take this opportunity to vent:

This is the first administration I've actually called to complain, particularly about the NYPD and their lack of meaningful presence in subways. I frequently see people, especially women and trans folks, being harassed or followed on the platforms or in the trains. Once there was a lady being followed and screamed at by a guy, and of course all the officers are just hanging out by the turnstiles. I informed one of them about the situation and he just looked at me like it wasn't his problem. Mayor Adams claimed that they've increased patrol, and allegedly crime is down, but really they're just there to give tickets for fare evasion.

Most other city agencies are having their budget cut, but not the NYPD. Which BTW has an annual budget of almost 6 Billion dollars, but most of that goes towards military grade equipment and surveillance technologies, which clearly aren't being used to protect people when they need it.

I want to say that the officers themselves are underpaid compared to other districts, but when you see how little they do, it almost feels deserved. Like in the video where the officer calls the trans lady who was being harassed a chicken, while holding onto his bullet-proof vest, with a gun in his holster, and surrounded by other officers with the same equipment.

Originally their excuse was because they got their feelings hurt by DeBlasio when he supported the BLM and said the Police can do better. But now they don't have that excuse. The current mayor is literally an ex cop. No other job can you not do any work and not get fired.

Such BS

Nypd pigs ain't shit as per usual

[service4cops]

Daddy doesn't know whether he has any more to give tonight. Don't worry, just come on in, sit back, unzip, and let me do all the work. I know exactly how to treat New York's Finest after a long, hard day of selfless service . . . with a long, hard night of selfless service.

[barisistill]

i feel so bad for bruno bc if he were in literally any other era of svu, his character would be so compelling

[drzibs]

its so funny to me, because i went into good omens a die-hard david tennant fan. like he’s my favorite doctor, ive watched most of broadchurch, hes like my emotional support bbc actor. and this is not me saying i love him any less, bc thats not true! hes a brilliant actor and a lovely human and is one of, if not, my most favorite actor of all time.

but mr. michael sheen…………. i have Words for you sir.

//all good words i am in awe of you my guy//

[wikipediafag]

so much more police rn this is so fucking stupid they have FIVE k9s standing blocking the stairs to the grand central subway ts so stupid

[purplepuggy]

had driving practice scheduled with my dad today so I had to take a break from watching WAD to do right and left turns for two hours

but then a guy (not black) threatened to call the cops on us (two black people) for driving on private property (my local public highschool's parking lot that I've hung out in all my life)

so im gonna go have a panic attack and a long shower and then SAVE ME DAN HOWELL TEACHING PRAGMATIC OPTIMISM SAVE ME

edit: called wifey after the shower and she listened, the wad watching continues now 👍

[backthebluek9]

They featured Abigail 💙🦙

[illdowhatiwantthanks]

Hey could I get an Angsty fic with wife Olivia Benson/Emily Prentiss (which ever you want) where the reader is a detective/profiler and gets hurt badly and Emily/olivia are the ones to find them and they have to keep them awake until the paramedics get there?

You can pick the injury

Hey @yanginginthere! 😊 It's been a minute since I wrote for Olivia, so that's what I did here! Hope you enjoy! –illdowhatiwantthanks

Eyes Open

Olivia Benson x fem!reader Warnings: MAJOR BIG HUGE WARNINGS for gun violence/school shootings, blood, death, etc., medical emergencies, near-death situation, hospitals, explicit language (let me know if I've missed anything!) Word count: 2.0k

Summary: When the rest of the squad is hesitant to enter the scene of a school shooting, you make one of the rashest decisions of your life--one you might not come back from. Your wife, Olivia, races to get to you in time.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, you thought as you watched blood pour from your abdomen. You were on the ground before you knew what was happening, before you could evaluate the situation. You pressed your hands over the gunshot wound, trying not to think about how much blood was seeping between your fingers.

You glanced around the room, panicked, nearly sick to your stomach. The racetrack rug, the little cubbies, the bodies. You wretched and vomited before collapsing onto your back. Your partner, Mendoza, lay on the opposite side of the room, pale, wide-eyed, still. Dead. He was dead. You swallowed back tears. Now was not the time to cry.

The shooter’s blood had sprayed across the bookshelves when you shot him. You couldn’t get close enough to feel for a pulse, but he wasn’t moving. So he was at least incapacitated. What you needed was to call for backup, to get the rest of the cowards from the NYPD–the ones who sat outside to wait for backup while you could hear children screaming–to get their asses in here and help. You and Mendoza had gone in against orders, had ignored a direct command from a superior officer to wait for backup. And, god knows, you’d both paid for it, but if even one child made it out that wouldn’t have otherwise, it would be worth it.

You felt for your radio at your side and groaned when you realized it had been shot by the same bullet that was now lodged inside of you. Your vision was starting to grow fuzzy; it was only a matter of time until you passed out. And who knew how long until backup finally decided to enter the elementary school?

You heard movement and jerked your head to the side to see the very top of a small head poking out from the supply closet.

“Hey!” you shouted, crying out in relief. The child shrank back, and you called, “No, no, no, it’s okay! It’s okay. I know it’s scary. It’s okay, sweetheart. I’m a police officer. I’m here to help you. That man with the gun, he can’t hurt you anymore. But I need your help. Do you think you could come out here and help me?”

The boy poked his head out again, a little bit farther, and you could see that his face was tear-stained, covered in snot. Your heart broke for him. You wanted to cry. You hated to traumatize him further, but you also knew that if you didn’t get backup and EMTs in here as soon as possible, more people were going to lose their lives–including you.

“Hi, honey,” you said as he stared at you, wide-eyed. “My name’s Y/N. What’s yours?”

He sucked in a breath, then shakily replied, “Arturo.”

You nodded. “Arturo. That’s a nice name. You’re being really brave, sweetheart. Is there anyone else in there with you?”

He nodded his head.

“How many people?”

Arturo held up five fingers.

“Five?” you asked, trying to focus your eyes.

He nodded.

“Are there any grown-ups?”

His face screwed up, like he was about to cry, and he shook his head.

“Okay, honey. That’s okay. Listen. Arturo, we need to call for help so the other police officers and the ambulance drivers can get in here and help everybody. Okay?”

He didn’t respond. You pointed to your busted radio. “My walkie talkie broke, but my partner’s should still work. He’s right over there… just–” You shuddered. God, you were having a child grab a device from a dead body. This poor kid. All these poor kids. But you didn’t know what else to do. “Just don’t look at his face or anything,” you told him. “The walkie talkie on his belt, that’s what we need. Can you do that for me, Arturo?”

He shook as he stood, and you could tell he’d wet himself in fear. Tears sprang to your eyes as you watched him wobble toward Mendoza’s body. “You’ve already been so brave, buddy, I just need you to be brave a little bit longer.”

You closed your eyes briefly, trying to fight the dizziness that swam inside your head.

“It’s stuck,” Arturo whimpered, and you snapped your eyes open.

“Okay, buddy,” you said, wracking your brain for a solution. “That’s alright. Umm… there’s a little button on the side, do you see that?”

Arturo nodded, his fingers wet with Mendoza’s blood.

“Alright, just press the button and hold it down, and then repeat what I say. Okay, Arturo?”

“Okay,” he whimpered, holding his little hand against the radio.

You exhaled sharply, as the pain in your abdomen surged. “Say, This is Officer Y/L/N.”

He repeated it, looking at you with wide, scared eyes.

“Badge number 11227.”

You gulped as your vision blurred, trying to be as concise as possible.

“Shooter is down. Officers down. Requesting immediate backup and medical assistance.”

You could feel your body falling out of consciousness, could hear Arturo talking to the other officers through the radio, but it was far away, as if you were in a tunnel.

“Please help,” he cried, fresh tears running down his cheeks. “She’s not talking anymore.”

The last thought you had before blacking out was that your wife would kill you if you died.

“Clear!” Olivia shouted, moving from classroom to classroom at PS 717, gun at the ready. The rest of the officers stopped as needed to help evacuate children and school staff, to give first aid as needed, but she and Elliot were single-minded. They had one job, and she had insisted it be theirs as the NYPD prepared to enter the scene: find the shooter and confirm that he was down.

The last person they had heard from was you. Well, a little boy who had your name and badge number and said all the right things and, therefore, was presumably with you. She was furious with you, furious that you’d gone in without backup, furious that you were so goddamned good and brave, that you would be willing to sacrifice your life for these kids, even though it was one of the things she loved most about you. And, truthfully, underneath all that fury was just plain fear. Absolute terror. Where were you?! Obviously you were hurt if you couldn’t call in yourself. And, from the sound of it, it had been you who took down the shooter.

“Liv!” Elliot yelled from a classroom down, and she sprinted toward him, her heart in her throat. Elliot was already on the radio: “We need medical here stat! East wing of the school, fourth classroom on the right. We’ve got two officers down, shooter down, multiple civilian casualties.”

Olivia burst into the classroom, her eyes quickly taking in the damage: Mendoza down, shooter down, kids crying in the corner, civilians down, and you. Her heart was in her throat as she holstered her gun and dropped to your side.

“No, no, no, baby,” she cried, cradling your limp head and feeling for a pulse. “Stay with me, sweetheart. You are too damn stubborn to go out like this.” Your pulse was thready and weak, as was your breath. She brushed your hair out of your face, trying hard to keep herself breathing, to not fall apart, not yet. She smacked you lightly on the face until you coughed and blinked your eyes open.

Olivia let out a sob of relief and caressed your face, pressing her free hand on top of yours to stifle your bleeding.

“Liv?” you groaned. Then weakly pointed in the direction of the shooter. “Is he…”

“He’s down, baby, he’s dead. You got him.”

You coughed again and winced, your body shaking with cold or trauma or both. “Arturo?” you asked, glancing around for him.

“The little boy?” she clarified. You nodded. “He’s safe, he’s okay. He’s with Elliot.”

Your body started to shake more violently and it was if, finally, the terror of the day had caught up with you. Tears streamed down your face. Your skin was clammy and your breath came in short huffs. You weren’t stupid. You knew what they meant, all the signs in your body: hypovolemic shock. You’d lost too much blood. You were dying.

You’d like to say that, in what you assumed were your dying moments, your life flashed before your eyes, that you thought of everything you’d experienced and everything you’d not yet been able to. But, honestly, you were just scared. And sad to leave Olivia.

“I love you,” you choked out as your eyelids fluttered between open and shut.

“No, no,” Olivia protested, grasping your face in her hands. “Don’t you fucking say goodbye to me, Y/N. This is not fucking goodbye! You keep your eyes open, Officer. That’s a direct order!”

And you really did try. You really did fight to keep Olivia’s face in front of you, her terrified, tear-stained face. You just couldn’t bear to leave her, not like this.

When you finally lost consciousness, Olivia yelling your name was the last thing you heard.

You woke up god knows how much later in a hospital bed, with several wires attached to you and an ungodly amount of pain in your abdomen, not to mention a mouth so dry it felt like your tongue had been left to dehydrate.

Before you knew what was happening, Olivia’s lips were on yours, her hands grasping the side of your face so tightly you thought there was a good chance she might never let you go.

“You fucking asshole,” she cried, her tears wet against your skin. “You almost died!”

She kissed you a few more times for good measure, then leaned back to look at you, your own tears streaming now. She sniffled and wiped your eyes, smiling even as she cried. “Why do you have to be so goddamned brave, huh?”

You shrugged, then winced. “No, no, don’t move!” she exclaimed. “Just… let yourself rest, okay?” She shook her head. “You really scared me.”

“I’m sorry, love,” you croaked out. You blinked tears away and looked at the ceiling, trying hard to banish the mental images of Mendoza, of the blood, of the civilians. “I just… I couldn’t…”

“I know,” she said, taking your hand. “I would’ve done the same thing.”

You coughed and frowned at her. “You better fucking not.”

She pointed to the table next to your hospital bed, stacked with cards and flowers. “You’ve got quite a lot of fans now.”

You shook your head. You didn’t deserve fans. If anyone deserved the recognition, it was Mendoza. You tried not to think of him, knew you’d start crying if you did.

“Here,” Olivia said, holding out a folded sheet of paper. “Read this one. It’s good.”

There was a stick-figure drawing of you as a superhero and a messy, misspelled note:

Dear Ofiser Y/L/N, thak you so much for helpig me be brav and for gettig the bad gy. Yor my heero. Arturo Guerrero.

Your eyes were swimming by the time you finished reading it. You should be the one thanking him.

“The NYPD’s giving you a Medal of Honor, too, when you’re well enough. You’re a hero, honey,” Olivia said, tracing your cheekbone with her thumb. “A dumb, brave idiot of a hero. But my hero, all the same.”

You didn’t know how you felt about this hero business, didn’t feel like you deserved it. You’d just done your job. And your job required a bit more of you this time around.

“Liv,” you ventured, uncomfortable.

“Yeah, baby?”

“Please don’t call me that.”

She furrowed her eyebrows. “A hero?”

You nodded.

“What should we call you then?”

You smiled wryly. “Just Y/N.”

Olivia leaned forward to brush your hair out of your face, staring lovingly at you. “How about love of my life?”

You smiled and squeezed her hand. “Yeah. That’ll do.”

[seokgyuu]

part of the @svthub 70's collab

Lee Seokmin is a very successful and admired Detective in the NYPD. Up until now he has had no trouble catching the bad guys. But when an especially horrific serial killer starts roaming the streets of New York City and he faces perplexity for the first time in his career - his superiors send a unit from the FBI trained to profile Serial Killers, which contains none other than you - Seokmin’s High School Sweetheart.

Pairing: Detective!Seokmin x FBI Agent!Reader

Genre: Criminal Minds/Detective AU, exes to enemies to lovers, Serial Killer AU, angst, Smut (MDNI!)

Warnings: Serial Killer theme, description of violence, description of dead bodies, cult themes, mentions of suicide, mentions of blood, mentions of abuse, mentions of suicide, character death (none of the main characters); smut warnings: fingering, penetrative sex, dirty talk, usage of the word “baby”, begging, reader has female anatomy, unprotected sex, creampie

Wordcount: 15.8k

a/n: I finally made it!! after months and months of writer's block I finally finished this fic, and I am actually really happy with it. Please mind the warnings, as this goes into darker themes. I also want to note, that I am no expert in terms of criminal language especially during the 70s in the us. So, if you spot anything that isn't all that accurate, i apologize! I also want to thank @multi-kpop-fanfics, @bitchlessdino & @strawberryya for reading through this and telling me i, in fact, do not suck at writing lmao. ily guys!!

taglist: @the-boy-meets-evil, @wooahaeproductions, @wongyuseokie

Lee Seokmin was a proud man. Proud of his grades in school and university. Proud of the man his parents had shaped him into. Proud of all the cases he had solved as a detective. With pride comes vulnerability, though. Especially in cases like these when he doesn’t have the right to be proud of himself. When he feels lost and helpless and his superiors look at him as if he had never solved a single case in his career. 

He knows. He knows he isn’t giving them or the people of New York City anything to go by. All he can do is say he needs more time. Time that no one has. 

“More people will die, Lee.” 

Seokmin hates Jeffrey Stolper. Hates him like fire burns. There is nothing he can do about it. Balling his fist under the table, Seokmin slowly raises his head. There is a certain emotion in Stolper’s eyes, an emotion Seokmin was happy to say he hadn’t seen many times before. His older colleague was gloating. While they were working together, their boss put Seokmin in charge because of the very obvious numbers differentiating them. Seokmin solved cases. Stolper left them cold. Seokmin couldn’t count the amount of times he had helped Jeffrey from drowning in his own misery, and this was the thanks he got. The older man was gloating because, for the first time in practically ever, Seokmin was lost. 

“Thanks, Stolper, couldn’t figure that one out myself,” he mumbled, letting his free hand roam over his sweaty face. Scoffing, the older male with the slowly graying hair leans back in his chair.

“Not the hot shot everyone says you are, aren’t you?”

“Shut the fuck up, this is not the time.” Seokmin’s voice is quiet but sharp, and Jeffrey laughs, his chest heaving as he seems to be vibrating with the horrendous sound of his arrogant laugh. It takes everything inside Seokmin not to get up from his chair and punch the hell out of the man. 

“Lee, Stolper.”

Both of them get up when their superior walks in, a big man with a receding hairline, a stubble on his strong face, and an old suit on his large frame. Frederic Bream isn’t much of an empath, but he does a good job. 

“Captain.” Seokmin and Stolper speak at the same time, watching as the captain nods and then waves his hand, telling them to sit back down. Once all of them are seated, he clears his throat.

“I know you hate to admit it, Lee, but we have no leads on this. No leads and a new victim.”

Seokmin’s heart falls down to his feet. Fuck. Another dead girl? Who will it be this time? He feels sweat starting to form at the top of his head. 

“Another one?” Stolper is serious and reaches for the case file Bream put on the table. Seokmin feels as if someone had dumped him in ice water, unable to move, shivering. He hates the fact that Bream is right - there are no leads. So far they haven’t gathered anything from what this monster does except that he always does it the same way. 

“Lauren White, 23. Student at Columbia,” Stolper reads, his face in a grimace, “she was found near Times Square, too. Fuck, Lee, I told you to put more patrols out!”

“Don’t be ridiculous. Even if we put every man we have on the streets, this city is huge, Stolper. He could just start moving them somewhere else.”

Stolper doesn’t respond. Instead, he shoves the file over to Seokmin, who takes it with his jaw tensed.

“This is different from before, boys,” Bream clears his throat, “this is a high-profile murder. She is the daughter of the district judge.”

Seokmin looks up from the file. 

“Why is this different from the other four victims? Because she has an important dad, suddenly the tables turn?” 

Bream sighs, pulling a hand over his red face. 

“It’s not fair, I know that, Lee. But this changes everything. The judge is furious. Was a real fucking asshole about it too, even for someone who just lost his daughter. He wants the slasher to be caught yesterday.”

“Oh, and we don’t? Captain, please, this is bullshit!” Seokmin scoffs, throwing the file back on the table and glaring at his superior, who looks straight back at him.

“I know. We all know Seokmin. It’s a bad situation. But, some might say, it did bring something good.”

“And what’s that?” Stolper speaks up, crossing his arms. Bream clicks his tongue.

“We got sent help. From the FBI.”

Silence is what follows. Seokmin feels the ice inside his veins melt and instead get replaced by fire. He knows Stolper feels the same. Everyone here feels the same. The fucking feds.

“They can’t take this from us. We’ve been on this for months,” Seokmin hisses, and Bream nods again, licking his dry lips.

“They won’t take it from us, Lee. They are only here to help. In fact, they aren’t… our usual feds.”

“What does that mean?” Seokmin raises his brows, leaning forward, hands on top of the table.

“They are a completely new department. Focused on the behavior of criminals, analyzing them, trying to figure out what is wrong with them.”

“They are killing people. That’s what's wrong with them!” Stolper shouts, and Bream holds up his hand. 

“I understand that you’re upset. God knows I am, too. But there is nothing I can do. Go talk to them. They just arrived.”

The ice is back, and this time it hits Seokmin right in the face. They are here already? Waiting for them? Embarrassment flows through his veins, mixed with an emotion he has never felt before regarding his job: failure. His legs are shaking as he gets up, but he tries to play it off, his body tensing when Bream leads them to the door and opens it. 

The hallway to the main hall suddenly feels longer than it is. The walls are closing in on Seokmin, the gray concrete threatening to suffocate him as he walks over the horrendous blue tiles he never understood were placed in the first place. Nothing really seems to be matching in this precinct. Most especially Seokmin and the federal agents waiting for them downstairs. He doesn’t know how his legs lead him to the glass front that shows the inside of the busy station downstairs. Everything is the same gray color. Everything is the same horrible blue. The only difference is the people standing in the right corner of the room all gathered around the whiteboard Seokmin has so carefully put together these past few months. 

His hands are sweating. This isn’t fair. This is his case. They aren’t supposed to be here and take credit for what he has done so far. What exactly have you done, Lee Seokmin? The voice in his head reminds him, and he balls his hands into fists as Bream opens the door leading to the stairs that will finally bring him to the federal agents he knows he’ll hate already. 

The atmosphere in the room is tense. More tense than usual because everyone in it is unhappy with the current situation. As if it isn't hard enough that there is a killer on the loose, now there are FBI agents trying to take this away from the NYPD? This is his town, Seokmin’s town! No one knows it as well as him. He knows every corner, every store. Every good place to eat, every bar to avoid. The people know him; they trust him with this, and now he is just supposed to accept that he can’t continue what he started?

He doesn’t know how, but somehow, he does end up right behind all the agents and one of the other detectives, Jeanne, and doesn’t even try to hide the fact that he is bitter. His arms are crossed as he listens to Jeanne explaining what is on the board. She had been a part of this - just like all the other detectives had been whenever they could. It’s not like crime suddenly stopped in New York City just because a serial killer was roaming around. If anything, it just got worse. 

“That’s about all we’ve gathered. I know it’s not much, but it’s all we got.” Jeanne closes her explanation, and Seokmin watches the backs of the agent's head nodding. Bream then clears his throat, making the others aware that they have joined and once the team of strangers turns around, Seokmin thinks someone has yet again taken a bucket of ice and dumped it all over his head. Because why on earth are you here? 

You see him the second he sees you. It’s almost funny how your professionalism slowly slips out of your control, how seeing him makes memories flood your brain and almost drowns you. Why is he here? He, who had left you with a sour taste seven years prior to this moment? Why is he standing there in a well-fitted suit, looking the best he ever had in a precinct that shouldn’t have anything pretty inside it? 

“Detectives, may I introduce you to agents Son, Song, Kim, Seok and Y/L/N. They were sent here by the FBI to help us with the investigations.” Jeanne smiles, but Seokmin knows it’s not an honest smile. You see it, too. When you had gotten the memo to go to New York City and help with the slasher murders, you had already known the detectives wouldn’t be too happy to see you and your team. 

“It’s nice to meet you. I’m the team leader, Hyunwoo Son.” You hear your boss speak, and you want to look at him, but your eyes are back to being glued to Seokmin. Lee Seokmin. The one who had taken everything from you when you were nineteen. 

“You too. I’m Detective Stolper. This is Detective Lee.” Bream doesn’t sound sincere. For once, Seokmin is relieved his older colleague likes to speak over him. He doesn’t know if he would have been able to say a word. 

Catching a serial killer is one thing. Catching him with someone you share an uncomfortable history with, another. You are sitting as far from Seokmin as you possibly can. With as many people between you as there are. 

Hyunwoo is standing at the front with Matthew, explaining what your team has gathered as of now. The rest of the precinct is listening to the presentation, and you just know they are all biting their tongues. No one wants you here. All of them think you’re a fraud. While you understand where they are coming from, you also think it’s time for them to accept the newly found ways to analyze the behavior of killers like the case at hand: the Manhattan Slasher. The air is thick with sweat, and you are sure 70% of it is yours. 

“We want to make clear that the work your precinct and especially you, Detective Lee, have done so far is incredibly helpful. We don’t want to discredit what you’ve done and we also don’t want to make you feel as if you’re getting kicked off the case. We aren’t your usual federal agents, Detectives, we are here to be of support to you. You still go outside and look at the crime scenes. You still get to do your work. We are here to assist, to see things we have been trained to see, things you cannot see, not for lack of smarts but lack of training.”

You had always admired Hyunwoo. How he spoke so clearly and calmly, how he never failed to make a person feel seen. You can feel the atmosphere shift. Some of the police officers visibly relaxing in their seats. You still don’t dare to look at Seokmin.

“Now, to what we have gathered. Dr. Matthew Seok will lead you through it.”

Seokmin wonders how old Matthew Seok is. He can’t be any older than 23. How on earth is he already a part of one of the newest FBI departments? And gets to be in charge of the presentation? And how does he already have a god damn PhD?

“Hi everyone, I’m Dr. Matthew Seok. With the help of the information you’ve gathered, we were able to come up with a profile for our unsub.”

Seokmin feels a scoff in his throat but manages to hold it back. A profile? What is he talking about?

“We are positive the unsub is a white man in his early to late 30s. He most probably grew up with an abusive mother, which explains why he only picks women as his victims. He doesn’t care about their race or social standing, which tells us he doesn’t hate one specific type of woman, but all of them. The age range of his victims is from early to mid twenties, meaning his mother had him young and gave him up around that time.”

You should be used to it by now. The reaction from the precincts. But it bothers you just as much as it usually does. The way they look at each other, the way they are already fed up with you being here. Your eyes wander over to the rest of your team, who you know are just as fed up as you, but they are better at hiding their emotions. Yuqi just stands there with her gum in her mouth, her arms crossed, and hoping she’ll get to go on the field soon. While she is an excellent profiler, she did train to become a field agent. It was pure coincidence that Hyunwoo had overheard her talking about this one case even Matthew had been struggling with. Jungwoo is the quietest one of your team, especially in situations like this. He just stands there, hands folded in front of his frame, eyeing the situation calmly. The team leader himself stands next to Matt still, his arms crossed as well and his gaze wandering over the crowd of people. A traitorous part of you envies him for being able to look at Seokmin without any repercussions. 

“How the fuck do you know that?” A voice now erupts from the sea of people. You turn around to see the man who had walked in with Seokmin. Stolper, you think his name was. A frown appears on your face.

“It’s not our job to explain profiling to you,” you say coldly and the older man’s eyes find you - just like Seokmin’s do. You decide to ignore them and turn back to face Matthew.

“Uhm. Yes, well, we do ask you to look into certain… well, behaviors. People like our unsub aren’t exactly the most masculine. He is probably very thin and might even have a disability - perhaps a prosthetic leg or something that makes him feel inferior. Look into churches, veteran centers, see if you find anyone that could match the profile and-,”

“You mean to tell me that the killer could be a vet?” Bream now interrupts, his eyebrows raised. Seokmin presses his lips together. If his colleagues hadn’t been wary of your bunch before, they sure as hell are now. War Heroes? Their precious American patriots that fought for their country and won a war? How could you even dare to speak ill of them? 

“No. He most probably didn’t serve. He tells people he did and that that’s the reason he has said disability,” Matthew continues calmly and you smile slightly. It was a reach, your reach, but so far all your reaches had been a shot to the bullseye. 

Then there was a sudden thud somewhere behind you, followed by hurried footsteps and news none of you could pretend didn’t make you sick to your stomachs.

This feels wrong. It’s broad daylight, there are people everywhere. You stand next to Matthew, your hands buried in your pockets, and listen to the statement of the girl that had called the police. 

“She was just next to me and then.. and then suddenly she wasn’t. I- I was confused and looked around and then I saw this- this man and how he dragged her by the arm into his car. No one did anything, no one- no one helped her and I- I didn’t-,” her voice breaks off and another set of tears well up in her eyes. Seokmin nods understandingly.

“Miss, you have nothing to blame yourself for. It is a busy street and you and your friend were not glued by the hip, alright? We will do our best to find her and you shouldn’t worry about what you could have done differently. You called us right away and that's the best thing you could’ve done.”

Tears are rolling down her face, sobs are erupting from her tiny body, and you wonder if Seokmin would ask her out if it wasn’t for the circumstances. The second the thought hits your brain, you freeze. What the hell? Why on earth would your mind go there? In a situation like this? You shake your head to yourself and look around - the police have put tape around the area where Kelly has gotten abducted. Her friend, Jean is being questioned, along with the few other people who claim to have seen something. But other than the witnesses, there isn’t much to go on about. The car he had dragged Kelly into had been an old one and Jean couldn’t exactly tell what kind. She also hadn’t been able to make out the license plate. So, all in all, it was all more or less useless information. 

“Detective Lee, I will need you to go to the morgue with Dr. Seok and Y/N,” Hyunwoo is suddenly there, right next to Seokmin and you hear his voice and feel your stomach tighten. The professionalism has to stay in its place, you know that. There is no room for you to fall back into old patterns; that one silly thought you had earlier was enough. You can’t let it get any further. 

But the tension is there and it's suffocating. You’re in the backseat of Seokmin’s car and Matthew is talking the man’s ear off with information you have heard millions of times before. Thankfully your friend and colleague doesn’t feel what you feel, what Seokmin feels, and for a short second you ask yourself how he even became the youngest member of your team - only for you to remember you have never met a mind as brilliant as his, with the exception of human interaction. He isn’t too good at those. 

The morgue is just like any other you’ve been in. This one still feels different, though. Probably because of the young girls you know shouldn’t be dead laying on top of the examination tables with nothing but a thin blanket over their pale, lifeless bodies. You should be used to this by now, you think. But you doubt you ever will be. 

Matthew is standing next to one of the women, the fourth victim, Fernanda Franco, with this look on his face you’ve seen many times before. You’re standing opposite him, your arms crossed and your eyes shifting over the body, wondering how much pain these women had been in.

“He did a thorough job with the cut,” the coroner says now; he is standing on the side of the room, holding a file, “my guess is he is good with a knife, maybe working with animals.”

“Right,” Matthew mumbles, a frown on his face as he leans forward, eyeing the victim from top to bottom. It’s somewhat fascinating how good he is at spotting things others haven’t seen before. Perhaps it had made you jealous a while back, but fortunately, that is over. Instead of being jealous, you appreciate his work and his abilities. 

Seokmin, meanwhile, is also looking through files. Mostly from the crime scenes. How the women looked before the coroner took care of them. The fact that they are all still here, and not yet down under, no funeral held at this point, makes his stomach turn. He knows it’s wrong. But as long as they haven’t found the killer, as long as there might be more evidence on the bodies… Seokmin suppresses a sigh. He wants to give the families the chance to find closure so badly. If only by giving them the opportunity to put their daughters, sisters, grandchildren to rest. 

The pictures are still hard to look at. The blood everywhere. The stained clothes. The signs of clear torture. Nothing sexual, at least. But then again, perhaps the killer doesn’t need to sexually assault them to feel arousal. That’s what Matthew said earlier. Seokmin closes the file and pulls a hand through his hair, his hat safely stored on one of the cabinets. 

“Dr. Richmond,” Matthew’s voice makes Seokmin look over to where you are standing. 

“Dr. Seok?” Richmond walks over to Matthew who is standing bent over the body, his hand holding… the victim’s ear. Immediately, you and Seokmin step closer, both of your eyes glued to the women’s earlobe. Something inside your stomach turns, goosebumps suddenly all over your skin and you feel your breath getting stuck in your throat.

“Why wasn’t this in the files?” Matthew now continues to ask, his eyes not leaving what he found. Dr. Richmond feels his face go pale and sweat starts to form on the palms of his hands. Blood is rushing through his ears and there is nothing he can say, nothing he can try to come up with because the bitter truth is-

“He didn’t know it was there,” Seokmin finishes the thought and Richmond swallows hard, hands wiping away at his lab coat. The detective is right. 

“Do all of them have this?” You ask now, finally able to move away from Fernanda and move over to Jennifer Cartwright, who looks way too peaceful for what had happened to her. But then, you are happy she does. A part of you hopes she is feeling peace wherever she may be. When you reach for her earlobe, you already know it will be there. You take a deep breath. 

“I’m- I don’t understand. I never… nothing like this ever happened, I-,” Richmond’s voice echoes through the room, but none of you pay him mind. The small crosses, carved into the soft tissue of the women’s earlobes, take all of your attention. 

There were only a handful of people in the meeting room. Your team and Seokmin and his superior officer. It bothered you, kind of. More people had to know. 

“These crosses, they have been used before,” Matthew is pacing through the room and Hyunwoo is right there at the front of it, his arms crossed and his thumbnail between his teeth. He is thinking, listening.

“This was in the late fifties, early sixties. A cult, they all followed this one man, Jonathan Brixley. He claimed to have somewhat superpowers, and while most didn’t actually believe him, he was such a good preacher, they followed him anyways. They weren’t known for being violent up until they seemed to vanish. Many thought they might have done a suicide pact, but no bodies were ever found. But what we do know is that whenever one of their own died, they would carve a little cross into their earlobe. Almost unnoticeable. Almost like a birthmark - it’s not even that surprising Dr. Richmond didn’t catch on.”

“He didn’t catch on that all of the girls have the same strange birthmark?” Seokmin frowns. You roll your eyes.

“We are all aware that this isn’t the ideal situation, Detective, but perhaps being bitter about it doesn’t make it better.”

It’s the first time you and Seokmin have directly talked. Or more like, the first time you had openly acknowledged each other's presence.

“With all due respect, Agent, I don’t care. I want to be bitter, I am allowed to be bitter. If we had known this weeks ago, we might have cracked the case by now!”

“I highly doubt that, Detective. With all due respect,” Matthew chimes in and the (unpleasant) moment between Seokmin and you is over. 

“And why is that?” Seokmin’s superior officer asks. 

“Well, as I said, the cult vanished. Finding out where the last remaining members are is almost an impossible task. If there even are any - I doubt they’d wanna be found. For all we know, they could be hiding in plain sight and we wouldn’t know.”

The atmosphere gets even more uneasy. If that’s even possible at this point. Seokmin scoffs and looks away, his hands in fists. You should know how to de-escalate but your head comes up empty. It’s almost as if there is an invisible barrier that forbids you from actually trying to be reasonable with Seokmin. 

Just when Hyunwoo seems like he wants to say something, the door opens. One of the police officers, a woman with red hair you don’t know the name of, comes in.

“We have a situation,” she says and her eyes are full of something even you, a profiler, isn’t so sure what the meaning of is. It looks like fear, confusion, but also something like hope. Immediately, everyone gets up and follows her outside, where you spot the board with all the pictures of the victims on it… and a red thread connecting one of them to a new face.

“That’s the girl I talked to earlier.” Seokmin breathes and he looks over at Ruth, who nods. 

“Yes, Detective. Jean told us that she knows one of the girls - Rebecca Twain. They used to go to the same church, same goes for her friend, Kelly, that she called in as abducted.”

Your eyes widen at that and you look over at Matt, who has his hand over his mouth, his face in a frown. A church. That fits the idea of the cult. All of you who were in the room earlier know that. This is good, this is an actual clue, one that might even lead to something after all! 

“What church?” Bream now asks the police officer named Ruth. 

“She wasn’t too sure. Said they haven’t been there in ages. She knew Rebecca when they were children and Kelly came to join them a few years later. But they haven’t gone to the church in at least 12 years. She said she would call us with more information, but so far she hasn’t.”

It doesn’t take a genius to understand why she hasn’t called the station yet. You sink down, leaning against one of the desks now, a hand rubbing over your face. This was bad. Seriously bad. Whenever a cult was involved in anything, it could only be so much worse than anticipated. Of course, her parents wouldn’t let her talk about it. Who would ever want to talk about something like this? Being part of a cult, if now or in the past - with everything happening these past years. 

“We need to speak to her parents. Now.” Hyunwoo is already out the door, probably heading to his car and you look over at the rest of your team, who all seem more or less as lost as you. It turns out to be Seokmin who follows your team leader first and once you see his figure speed past you, you also begin to move. 

The ride is quiet. Hyunwoo’s hands are white around the steering wheel. You sit next to him in the front, Seokmin in the back. All of this feels surreal to you and you are sure it’s not that different for Seokmin. Serial Killers were a constant part of both of your lives, but you - you haven’t been for a good amount of years. It’s like a bad taste in your mouth, as if somehow the food you would always cook perfectly suddenly went bad, had a foul ingredient in it, was cooked for too long. You’re not sure what it is, but it doesn’t sit right with you. 

Seokmin, in the back seat, feels about the same as you. He is used to gruesome murders, to killers who don’t care about anything but themselves, but he isn’t used to having you around in all of this. Someone from his old life that he doesn’t associate with any of this. Never in a million years would he have predicted you becoming a federal agent. When you dated back in high school, you had always talked about wanting to go into politics, fighting for women’s rights, feminism, all that jazz. You had even applied to all the IVYs, wanting to study political science. So, how did you end up here? 

“We will have to be careful.” Hyunwoo now breaks the silence and makes Seokmin and you look at him.

“The parents won’t be too happy to share their story, I can imagine. No one likes to admit they were in a cult, not after Manson.” 

You nod and Seokmin scoffs, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms. 

“One would think people wouldn’t even join any cults after Manson,” he says and Hyunwoo laughs bitterly, nodding slightly as he takes the next right at the intersection.

“Right. Sadly, it isn’t as easy as that.”

You look at Seokmin through the rearview mirror, watch how his jaw is tightened and how his arms are crossed, how his suit jacket is discarded next to him on the backseat. You wonder how long he has been part of this lifestyle, how long he’s been a cop. You hadn’t heard from him in years, not even when your friends offered to do some digging for you. It wasn’t because you weren’t interested. More so because you felt like you would get too invested. Looking away again, you straighten out your shoulders. This isn’t the time to think about the past, there are way more important things to focus your energy on. 

Five minutes later, Hyunwoo finally parks the car in front of the house of the Roger’s and the three of you get out to walk over to the front door where Hyunwoo rings the doorbell twice. It only takes about twenty seconds before the door opens and a slim woman with bright red hair and red lips stands in front of you, an apron around her waist and a mitten in her hand.

“Yes?” She looks at you with blinking eyes and the three of you take out your respective badges. The woman’s eyes widen. 

It is safe to say that getting information out of Jean’s parents is almost impossible. They are a middle class family with middle class friends, he works in real estate and she does her best to keep the house and children under control. They don’t want to talk about their past at the church, or more like, they try to deny it ever was a part of their lives. Talking to them comes close to talking to a wall, if the wall felt guilt and shame and was worried about its reputation. Only when you mention Jean for the third time, reassuring her parents that they aren’t in trouble and that no one was going to find out, that the only mission you had was to find the missing girl and find out who had killed the other innocent women - they budge. 

Mr. Rogers gets up, a certain shake in his knees, and walks over to one of the dark hardwood dressers standing on the right side of the spacious living room, where he opens a drawer and takes out what looks like a little notebook. You, Hyunwoo and Seokmin look at him attentively. 

“We haven’t talked to anyone from that church in years. Or well, we hadn’t. Up until a few weeks ago. You see, there used to be this… this farm. It was for retreats, we would go there every other month. Sing and pray, meet new people from other parts of the country,” he begins to explain as he walks back, reluctantly handing the notebook to you. Taking it with a small thank you, you look at the page he had opened it to and see a number and a name. 

“This is the name and telephone number of the couple that bought the farm years ago. We- we haven’t been going to the retreats since 1961, but a couple weeks ago an old acquaintance from the church called us. Kathryn Anderson, she was pretty close to Pastor Brix-,” he stops himself mid sentence, “to, uh, to Mr. Brixley. She wanted to know if we knew who bought the farm.” “And what did you tell her?” Seokmin asks now. 

“He told her no. That we were never interested in knowing,” Mrs. Rogers now answers the question for her husband, “you see, when we left the church it was mostly because of Jean. We figured after a while that perhaps this church wasn’t what we wanted for our daughter. So, we left. It wasn’t easy, but we did it. A couple months later, the whole thing fell apart anyway. Kathryn wasn’t around for that because she had been arrested about six months before we left the church. Got a good couple of years behind bars for attempted murder, the woman. When she got out, she couldn’t reach anyone - after all, the church didn’t exist anymore. Jonathan had perished, no one knows where he ended up and she was unsure what to do. So, she finally got a hold of us and wanted to know everything about the farm. But again, we told her we didn’t know who bought the farm. We just told her it was over and that she needed to find a different safety net.”

You look over at Hyunwoo, wondering if he thinks the same thing you do.

“But you obviously do know who owns the farm now.” He says calmly. The housewife swallows, then nods.

“We do. Paul actually sold the farm to them.”

How convenient, you think. Hyunwoo smiles and Seokmin clicks his tongue.

“I see. Well, thank you for the name and number, but now it would be great if you could also let us know the address.”

“I don’t understand,” you say, your arms crossed in front of your chest. Hyunwoo is sitting at his makeshift office desk, rubbing his temples.

“What exactly do you not understand, Y/N?” 

“Why we need to go to the farm. Or no, why he and I need to go.”

“Don’t be stupid, Y/N. Matthew confirmed it, the cult used this farm back in the day. There could be a lead there. And you and Detective Lee are going because you’re my best agent and he’s their best detective. I also feel like you two need some bonding time. Honestly, I’ve got no clue what your issue is with him, but you’ll need to get your act together. This is a serious case and I can’t have you dislike the main detective.”

Dislike. That’s one word to describe it. You bite the inside of your cheek. 

“So, you will drive to the farm with him and talk to the couple as well as check out the surroundings. See if you find anything that could be helpful to the case, got it?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

Hyunwoo nods, satisfied. He then waves his hand, telling you to get out and do your job. You suppress a sigh and instead walk out and almost into your newly assigned partner - Seokmin. He looks about as happy about the situation as you feel, but neither of you says a word while you walk out of the precinct and to the car that would take you the 100 mile drive to Schnecksville, Pennsylvania. 

“You drive.” Seokmin’s voice rips you out of your thoughts and you thankfully react quick enough and catch the keys he throws at you. Rolling your eyes, you walk over to the other side and open the car, sitting down in the driver’s seat. The second your door is closed and Seokmin’s door is closed, his presence almost drowns you. 

“I was always better at reading maps than you,” he mumbles next to you and you feel your cheeks heat up and your stomach turn and you decide to ignore him and instead start the car. 

Seokmin presses his lips together, the map on his lap and his heartbeat loud and clear in his ears. Bream really thinks he did something. Putting Seokmin in a car with you for the next two hours. Apparently, your little bit of tension did not remain unnoticed and now this was his punishment. But what was he supposed to do? Tell Bream that you were his ex-girlfriend from high school who he had left seven years ago with nothing better than a pathetic letter goodbye. It hadn’t been his finest moment, but god, he was nineteen. Back then, he had enlisted in the army after high school, something he was bound to do anyways, and being cowardly as he was, he just hadn’t felt like telling you in person. Then, when he had been discharged, he had signed up for the academy and here he is now. He knows he should say something, apologize for the way he left you. But his pride and the shame don’t let his lips move, don’t let the words come out. And so he just looks at the map and waits to give you instructions. That’s what he can do. That’s how he can cope with being next to you. 

The drive is long and quiet and you turn on the radio at one point, listening to quiet music almost soothing. The highway is wide and the city is behind you and you wonder how long you’ll have to be in this car before your head starts to actually fume from all the thoughts running around. 

When you see the sign for Schnecksville, you almost sigh in relief. Seokmin tells you which exit you have to take and you follow his instructions, wondering how you actually got through this drive without any actual communication besides his directions. 

Schnecksville is filled with nothing and a gas station. You also pass a motel and a convenience store on your way to the farm that is a few miles away from the city center. Once you finally arrive, you can’t get out of the car quick enough, shoving the keys into your jacket when the car is locked. The farm is bigger than you had anticipated and Seokmin, who has discarded his jacket and hat on the backseat, looks just as surprised as you.

“Guess we have some ground to cover. Come on.” He takes the lead and you follow him, even though a part of you feels the need to run ahead. You don’t. You’re not a child. 

The woman who opens the door is in her early sixties with graying hair and a cat in her arms.

When you and Seokmin introduce yourselves and show your badges, she gasps slightly.

“Oh, you know, my sweet peach always runs out when I open the door, she is sick, can’t really find her way back when she gets out. Come on in, agent, detective.”

Her name is Mabelle Travis and her husband is Keith Travis, but he isn’t at home right now. He is getting some groceries for them. 

“How kind of your husband to help you with that,” you say as you sit down on the couch in the pastel colored living room. Mabelle nods, letting the cat back down.

“Oh, he is the one with the driver’s license, dear. I can only go grocery shopping if he comes with me. Or our son is in town.”

You nod and look over at Seokmin, who is looking at some of the family pictures on the dressers by the door. 

“Your son doesn’t live with you, ma’am?” He asks and Mabelle shakes her head as she sits down on one of the horrifically green armchairs. 

“No, Detective. He used to, you know, live with us. But that was before we bought the farm. My husband always dreamt of having a farm. When he retired, he thought it might just be the time.” She laughs and looks from Seokmin to you.

“But, what can I do for you?”

“Well, we were wondering if you’d be alright with us looking around the farm? We don’t know if you know, but the farm used to belong to a church before you bought it.”

“Ah, yes. We did know. I think that’s why we got it cheap. What exactly are you looking for, agent?”

“We’re not sure. But we think the church might have some connections to a case we are currently working on.”

Mabelle nods, her face in a frown. 

“Oh my. Well, you’re in luck then. We bought the farm years ago, but only recently moved in. So, most of the barns are still untouched. Only this house has been through some construction,” the cat jumps up on her lap and Mabelle smiles down at it, her hand carefully caressing its fur.

“That’s good news, Mrs. Travis. We’ll go take a look then.” Seokmin nods his head towards the back door and you smile at Mabelle before getting up and following Seokmin outside. There are three barns in total - one is large and two are on the smaller side, leaving the two of you with enough ground to work with for the next few hours. You exchange looks and decide to check out the smaller space first, a barn that is completely bare except for a wooden table at the far right that holds a few blueprints. Seokmin checks them out, his eyes scanning them for anything out of the ordinary. You, meanwhile, begin to knock at the wall, listening for hollow spaces, but also come back with nothing. The barn seems as normal as a barn could be. 

The second one is a little trickier. It’s not empty, instead it’s filled with boxes that, after checking as good as each and every one, all seem to be empty. You check your wrist for the time, wiping your forehead with the back of the other hand. You’ve really been at it for the last two hours. 

“I think we should move on to the last barn. I doubt the rest will hold anything of worth. Come on.” Seokmin is next to you all of a sudden and you flinch, looking away from your watch and at the man, who has sweat dripping down his temple. His eyes are set on your face and you wonder if you look just as exhausted as he does. Clearing your throat, you nod and turn away from him, walking out of the barn and to the next one. 

Seokmin sighs, following you outside and grabbing your arm once he catches up with you. 

“Y/N, I am just as delighted about doing this with you as you are with me, believe me. But perhaps we should at least try to do our job.” 

His words sting more than they should have and you are well aware of that. Funny to think that such wounds would have healed after seven years. You shake off his hand and turn around to face him.

“Oh, is that right, Seokmin? You’re just as delighted as I am?” You raise your eyebrows at him. “As far as I can remember, Detective, you left me with nothing more but a joke of a letter.”

Seokmin bites down on his tongue. You are right. Maybe it wasn’t right of him to compare the two of you.

“I know that. I know I hurt you. And I should have apologized for that years ago. I was young and-,”

“Let me guess? Stupid? That is in fact correct, Seokmin. But I don’t care about an apology, at least not anymore. I just want to get this over with, not have chit-chat with you about the past which neither of us can change anymore. So, will you go to the third barn with me so we can finally leave this stupid town?”

Seokmin watches you walk away, his heart heavier in his chest than before. He really should have reached out sooner. Pulling a hand through his hair, the detective suppresses another sigh and finally follows you to the third and last barn for you to check. 

The Travises invite you for dinner and Seokmin and you are both too polite to decline. Thankfully Mabelle is incredibly talkative, loves telling you all the tales about their son, Henry, and how they used to live in the city but then moved to a smaller town. She is excited about her husband’s birthday coming up soon and Henry coming over to visit, and basically her favorite topic to discuss is him. You try your best to resist the urge to look over at Seokmin next to you, to see if he is as amused about this as you are. He is not your ally, not your friend. You shouldn’t be looking for his gaze, shouldn’t be curious of his thoughts. 

“Does your son visit you often?” Seokmin now asks after taking a sip from his glass filled with tap water. 

“Not as much as we’d like.” Mrs. Travis sighs and pats her husband’s hand.

“He is busy with working in the city, not always available.” Mr. Travis now explains and Seokmin and you nod. That makes sense. You try to remember the last time you had time to visit your own parents. You couldn’t even really remember. 

“If there is something we want to check again, would it be alright if we came back?” Seokmin asks when you finally stand at the front door, saying your goodbyes. The Travises nod, allowing you to come back whenever. After waving at them you walk back to the car, Seokmin now getting into the driver’s seat. As you sit down on the passenger seat the atmosphere quickly becomes tense now that you’re alone again. The second your doors are closed, a familiar sound is heard.

“Oh, you’ve got to be joking.” 

Rain. It’s starting to rain. What starts with a few drops on the windshield turns into a full on piss of rain that has the both of you staring at the scene for a few seconds. When a second later you hear thunder so close it almost shakes the car, Seokmin reluctantly starts the engine.

There is no way in hell you can drive home in this weather. As much as the both of you hate it, you’ll have to stop somewhere and wait out the storm. Seokmin suggests the motel you had seen on your way here and you nod, knowing there wasn’t much else you could say or do. Having to stay somewhere with Seokmin, somewhere you couldn’t just flee from, seems like the number one worst scenario you could find yourself in. You look at him from the passenger seat, trying to my sly about it but of course he notices your eyes on his face.

“Believe me, I would rather not do this either, Y/N. But I’d rather be safe than drive on the highway in this weather.”

You don’t answer him. Mainly because you would have to tell him he is right and that’s most definitely not going to happen. 

“What do you mean by that?” Seokmin looks at the bored looking woman in her fifties. She sighs and shoves the one room key towards him again. 

“I mean, Sir, that there is only one room left. We are fully booked. Have you seen the rain?” 

It’s very obvious a rhetorical question but Seokmin is about to go on a rant to tell the woman that, of course, he has seen the rain but how on earth does this justify there only being one room in a god damn motel miles away from any big city? 

“We’ll take the room,” you quickly interject, handing the lady your credit card that she looks at with a straight face.

“Honey, you’re in the middle of nowhere. Do you really think we take those things?” You feel your cheeks heat up, retreating the card again.

“That’s 16.50$ for the night,” she continues and you hand her a twenty that she takes without a word, shoving the change over the wooden surface, “have a pleasant stay.” She shoves down the small plastic window and you and Seokmin exchange a quick look before making your way to the room you will now have to share. 

There is only one bed. You stare at it and so does Seokmin. Because - of course there is. How could you have not asked the woman at the counter? But then again even if you had… there wasn’t much you could have done about it. Maybe a saw, you think, just saw it in half. The two of you stay silent for a good minute, before Seokmin finally sighs, pulling a hand over his face. 

“Looks like we can’t do much about this. Just… it’s just one night, alright? We can do this.” 

You don’t really understand why he would say that. Why he would speak for you, when you both know it isn’t okay and you most definitely can’t do this. You take a deep breath, throwing your bag onto the very dirty looking armchair next to the door. 

“Whatever,” you respond, rolling your eyes as you make your way into the bathroom, if only to get away from Seokmin for a short while. His presence is stressing you out more than you thought it would. Perhaps that had been foolish of you - thinking this wouldn’t be the absolute worst thing to ever happen. But at the same time, it’s not like Hyunwoo had given you much of a choice. He had straight up told you to get your act together and yet… You sigh, the door closed next to you. The bathroom isn’t even half as bad as you had feared. It’s small and the shower could need a scrub (or three), but other than that it’s decent. The toilet looks clean and the mirror hanging over the sink shows you your exhausted face. Dark circles under your eyes that you touch with your cold finger tips. You remember how you looked back in High School. How much you smiled, how happy you were almost every single day. And all because of him. He, who promised you the world only to rip it away when you needed stability the most. It wasn’t fair. Him being here, him playing such a big role in something so important to you. Finding this killer that took lives like it was nothing. Seokmin is here with you and he sure as hell isn’t going anywhere else. The effect he has on you is annoying, to say the least. You don’t want to feel this way, feel insecure and small and like you need to prove yourself to him. He isn’t worth your energy, your thoughts. Not him as a person at least. Him as a Detective is a different story. Another deep breath followed by some water that you splash into your face, is what finally makes you step out again and face your ex-boyfriend that has taken a seat on the bed, the case file spread next to him. 

He is handsome. High cheekbones, perfectly shaped eyebrows. His hair is styled back, but slowly the front strands are falling into his face. His face is in a small frown as he looks at the documents, as he tries to make sense where you all fail to find any. Your heart betrays you by skipping a beat, by suddenly sending a wave of sadness over you. He never told you why he left. He just did. 

“Anything making more sense now?” You ask cautiously, walking over to him with slow steps. Seokmin looks up slightly before shaking his head. 

“Not really,” he mumbles, “it doesn’t make sense. None of this. Why is he curving the crosses into their ears? Why is he choosing these girls specifically?” You sit down on the other side of the bed, gnawing on your lower lip.

“Well, Matthew told you our theory. Abusive mother, hatred towards women.”

“But why- why would he just go after any woman if his mother was a certain type?” Seokmin looks up at you and you feel a sting in your chest. You shrug.

“You’re right to question this theory. It’s not perfect and it will take a few years until we can really say that we have a high percentage of accurate profiles. So far we’ve been good, very good. But not as good as we can be. This unsub is unique because he doesn’t have a type - it almost seems random. Like he goes out on the street and sees a girl and just takes her,” you lick over your lips, letting your eyes wander to the window, the storm on full display, “he is violent, but he also kills them quickly. No signs of sexual abuse. It’s odd and not like anything we’ve seen before.”

Seokmin listens to you speak and allows himself to actually listen. The whole profiling thing - it most certainly hasn’t been something he trusted so far. But now, hearing your words, seeing the look on your face - he almost feels ashamed of his earlier suspicion. 

“It’s just-,” he begins, his hand pulling through his hair, “it’s confusing. Why would he not go for people who look like his mother? Why is he not taking revenge on her over and over again?”

You feel your thoughts stumble over that sentence for a good thirty seconds. Seokmin is right - why wouldn’t he take revenge on his mother over and over again? Why would he kill women that look nothing like her? Without really noticing, you get up, your feet carrying you over to the window, staring at the rain outside, hoping it would give you the clue you so desperately need right now.

“You agree, don’t you? That it is odd!” Seokmin gets up too, only to turn around and look at the files again, his arms crossed, eyes scanning all the pictures and clues the team has gathered so far. 

“Yes, it definitely is odd,” you mumble, heart racing in your chest. 

“Okay. We’ll go over this again. There has to be something we’re missing. A connection between them, a club they all go to. Anything, just… fuck, it feels as if there is clue right there, hidden in plain sight and we are missing it because it’s too damn obvious!”

Hidden in plain sight. You blink against your reflection in the window. Hidden in plain sight. Matthew had said the same thing back at the precinct. 

For all we know, they could be hiding in plain sight and we wouldn’t know.

You swirl around, eyes wide and Seokmin looks at you with a confused expression. 

“What?” 

“The barn,” you breathe, eyes flickering to the table, where the car keys lay right where Seokmin left them, “we need to go back.”

Seokmin tries to stop you, the storm still howling outside, but you’re not letting him. This is too important, too obvious. You want to kick yourself for not realizing it earlier. For seeing something that was right there, but not actually seeing it. 

You run to the car, soaked from head to toe when you sit down on the driver’s seat. The door to the passenger seat opens and Seokmin plops down, just as drenched as you are.

“Jesus Christ, Y/N, will you tell me what the fuck is happening right now?”

Instead of answering, you start the engine, the wipers doing their best to clear your view.

“Y/N!” Seokmin repeats loudly and you let out a breath you hadn’t even realized you were holding.

“It has to be in there! In the barn. All those god damn empty boxes. One of them has to have something in it, something they don’t want us to find. Fucking hell, we could have had the whole team here by now, Seokmin! If only we hadn’t been lazy!”

“Wait, hold on. So you think the Travises have something to do with this?” Seokmin asks and you shrug.

“Honestly? I don’t think they do. But it’s still their property now. And most of these boxes are theirs. I’m sure we’ll find something there. We just have to look at every single box.”

You’re almost in a haze, Seokmin thinks. Your eyes have completely changed and the way you drive this car would have been scary if only you weren’t so damn impressive. You have been impressive the whole day, Seokmin thinks. He would never say it out loud (not to you at least) but this job seems to fit you like a glove. Never did it cross his mind back in High School that you’d end up in the same field as him. He gulps down the nostalgia and instead looks out the window, wondering if the rain will stop anytime soon. 

It hasn’t been long since the two of you left the Travises and yet, when you arrive, the house is dark. Checking your watch you see it's already after 9pm. 

“They said we can come back whenever.” You say more to yourself than Seokmin, but the latter still nods, cursing under his breath when he steps out of the car and into the horrible weather. You run alongside him, passing the house and first barn, setting foot in the one you had a hunch about with both of you drenched from head to toe. Ignoring the cold creeping up, you begin examining the boxes once again. There is nothing extraordinary about them. They are the usual cardboard boxes one uses for moves, all over the country. It’s nothing you haven’t seen thousand of times before and-

“Y/N, look at this.” Seokmin’s voice fills the silence that has only been accompanied by the sound of rain and thunder before. Looking over at him, you see that he is holding up two different boxes upside down. There is a green dot on both of them. Your eyes widen. Quickly, you check your own box - but nothing. There is no dot. Confusion mixed with frustration begins to rise within you and you throw the box to the side, pulling clam hands through wet hair. 

“There has to be a system,” you mumble, closing your eyes as you try to calm yourself down. Seokmin hears your words and looks around the room, trying to make sense of how the boxes are lined up. They all look the same. They were all stacked the same when you came in earlier today. There isn’t anything about them that makes one different from the other - except for the dots he had discovered. His brain is working at full speed, his eyes roaming from one side of the room to the other. Only when he looks down, does he see something.

“Y/N, look,” he puts the two boxes he held up to the side and crouches down, your figure standing over him a second later. There were clear lines painted on the floor. He looks up at you and you feel your eyes beginning to shake, as you move as quickly as possible, shoving more boxes to the side and focusing on the floor. And yes, only a few moments later you find yet another line, one that contains boxes with more dots - orange ones. But it doesn’t stop there. Seokmin finds another line and boxes that, once again, don’t have a dot. He wants to pull his hair out, but once you begin looking at the boxes with him, your gaze full of determination, he calms down. Together, the two of you turn over every single box until, after what feels like hours, you let out a gasp. The box you’re holding now doesn’t only have a red dot on it - it also contains something. Seokmin is next to you right when you pull out the small key that makes both of you almost jump in glee. Your hunch had been right. Now all you had to do was find where the key belonged. Your eyes met and without words, Seokmin went to the left side of the room and you to the right one, both of your hearts beating at rapid speed at this point. Neither of you wants to or will leave this place until you find whatever door is hidden behind the wooden planks decorating the walls. Your hands flew over them, knocking to hear a hollow sound, anything that would indicate there being a hidden space. Nervous sweat was now mixing with the rain on your face, the earlier cold all forgotten thanks to the adrenaline you were feeling. 

“I got something!” Seokmin suddenly yells after a few minutes and you immediately turn and run over to him, seeing him break the wall free of the plank. Just that there is no wall. It is a thin wooden door with a small lock that looks like it was made for the key safely stored inside  the pocket of your jeans. Without any hesitation, you move forward, key back in your hand after pulling it out, and reuniting it with its lock - the door clicking open a second later. Seokmin and you look at each other again before you push the door with your hand, it easily swings open for you and Seokmin to see a narrow hallway led down by an old looking staircase. There is a string hanging down from the ceiling which Seokmin pulls on, lighting up the hallway for you to see more clearly. 

“Well, let’s go,” you say and Seokmin nods, both of you with one hand on your gun belts as you walk down the stairs, all the way down to a door that, thankfully, isn’t locked. Pushing this one open as well, you are met by another hallway, longer this time, with three doors leading to different rooms on each side. You feel adrenaline rush through you as you begin walking, Seokmin right behind you. The first two doors lead to empty storage rooms, you taking the ones on the left, Seokmin on the right. Your hands feel clammy and your senses are all heightened as you continue to the next door, opening it at once and checking the insides carefully, gun in your hand. No one is in there - but it’s also not empty. 

“Seokmin!” You call out and the man is beside you right then, eyes scanning the room. It’s an office, or at least it appears to be. Right on the wall across from you hangs a portrait of a beautiful landscape and only barely hides a very obvious closet of some sorts. You shove your gun back into your belt and walk straight up to it, while Seokmin goes to examine the desk standing at the left side of the room. He pulls out a pair of gloves from the inside pocket of his jacket and pulls them over his fingers before he begins to open each and every drawer. 

“There isn’t much dust around here,” you suddenly say and Seokmin looks over at you.

“What do you mean?”

“Someone comes here regularly. Cleans it of dust, keeps the floors clean.” You look around for a moment, then your focus is back on the painting hanging over the closet. Your hands are also wrapped up in a pair of gloves and you move slowly as you grab the edges of the frame to heave it off the wall. It occurs to you that the last time someone was here, they hadn’t succeeded in putting the painting back into its usual spot. You can tell because it comes off the wall without any problems, having been crooked from the beginning on. Now, you lean it against the wall next to you, before your hands open the closet. 

“Is something in there?” Seokmin walks over to you now, nothing interesting inside the desk.

Once he comes to a halt next to you, he feels himself gasp. There is a whole shelf with files that seem to be alphabetically organized. Your heart beat speeds up once more as you grab a random file (Br-Bu) and open it. 

“That-,” Seokmin’s eyes widen. As you continue staring at the page, he moves to pull out more of the files. He brings them over to the desk and opens them one by one, until he finds all the names he has been looking for.

“Broshard, Cartwright, Franco, Rogers, Twain and White.” 

Seokmin and you are staring at the files. It was all of the girls’ parents. They had all been part of this cult before. It made sense, of course it did. And yet, having it here, black on white, was still a shock. This meant their connection had been right there, so easy to grab, and none of the parents had thought about sharing this with the police. You lean against the desk, hands pulling through your damp hair. Seokmin’s hands are propped on his hips, his eyes reading over the names over and over again. 

“We have confirmation now,” he states, “we need to call the precinct.” He looks over at you and you nod, your hands still resting in your hair. Worry rushes through Seokmin and he finds himself standing in front of you a second later, his hands around your wrists to bring your hands back down softly.

“We will get him,” he says then, eyes boring into yours, “we will get him and he will be punished, Y/N, I promise you.”

It’s unprofessional, he knows it and so do you. You don’t ever promise to catch a killer. 

“Why didn’t the parents tell you?” Your voice is quiet and Seokmin sighs, shrugging. His hands are still holding you.

“I don’t know. Shame, fear? Whoever is doing this is a cold blooded murder, Y/N, they were probably scared he’d take even more from them.”

“More than a child?” You look up at him, letting the feelings that you’ve been holding back finally crack through. 

“I guess so? We will find all of this out tomorrow, we just need to get back to the motel and call the precinct.” 

He says the words but doesn’t move. Neither do you. You both stay right where you are, your eyes locked on each other. The air around you shifts, the exhaustion mixes with something you only have faint memories of.

“You are incredible, do you know that?” Seokmin whispers finally, “the way your brain works - it’s incredible. Admirable.” 

His body heat engulfs you, makes you feel hot and cold at the same time. You swallow down your doubts and instead let your heart do the talking.

“You’re just as incredible, Seokmin. All the work you’ve done in this case already… if it weren’t for you, we wouldn’t be here right now.”

Seokmin feels himself holding his breath as his one hand moves from your wrist to your fingers, interlocking them with his own while the other moves up, cupping your cheek, thumb caressing the side of your chin. He feels your skin, the softness he remembers better than he wants to admit. 

Neither of you is sure who does it. Who dares to close the distance. But you’re kissing, his lips warm and familiar on yours. Your arms move by themselves, wrapping around Seokmin’s neck as he deepens the kiss, his tongue licking over your bottom lip slowly, asking for entrance that you give him without any hesitation. He kisses better than he did back in high school and his hands are more experienced, moving down and up to grab your hips and hoist you on top of the desk, standing in between your legs now. You grab his face, your tongue licking against his, feeling the stress and discomfort of the day leave you with every touch of his skin. The kiss grows more and more desperate, both of you panting against each other and only after a good five minutes do you part, his hands in your hair and yours on his nape.

“We should get out of here,” he mumbles against your lips then and you nod, letting him help you down the desk.

This time the drive isn’t awkward. It’s filled with something else, something you haven’t felt in so long. Not just regarding Seokmin - but in general. Your work is your everything and you and your team travel around the country more than you don’t. Wanting someone, feeling wanted by someone, this hasn’t happened to you in a while. Your gaze keeps wandering to the driving Seokmin, to the man that had once hurt you so much and now was the only thing you could concentrate on. 

“If you don’t stop looking at me like that I will park this car on the side of the road and not give a fuck about anyone seeing what I want to do to you, Y/N.”

His deep voice made your insides turn deliciously, the heat between your legs rising as you licked over your dry lips, eyes shaking as you nodded, averting your gaze from Seokmin’s intoxicating frame. As much as the idea excited you it also seemed like a stupid idea considering the motel really wasn’t that far away. 

It doesn’t take half as long as it usually would with Seokmin speeding down the road, finally parking the car in the parking lot, getting out of the car and opening the door for you, his hand around yours in no time as he leads you to the door, both of you drenched again when you step inside. But even with all the tension between you two, Seokmin walks over to the telephone on the wall, passing a young man who just seemed to have left his room to go outside. You present him with a nod when he smiles at you, quick to look at Seokmin again who is now dialing the number of the precinct. 

When he explains what you found, he speaks quietly and rushed, you by his side the whole time, holding his fingers between yours. The tension doesn’t subside, it only gets shoved to the side as Seokmin talks to his superior, who was still at the station at this time, waiting for your call. Your head feels dizzy, the situation bizarre but also somewhat addictive. The second Seokmin hangs up, knowing his colleagues will leave for Schnecksville as soon as the storm gets better, he wraps an arm around your waist and leads you to your room with hurried steps. 

The door falls shut behind the two of you and your body is pressed against it, Seokmin’s one hand skillfully wrapped around both of your wrists, pinning them over your head as he dips down to kiss you, his thigh pressing between yours. A moan escapes you, your hands wiggling under Seokmin’s grasp. He kisses you with the same desperation as before, his free hand underneath your shirt, fingers pressing into your skin. 

Nothing is inside your head except the need for him. You don’t want to feel anything but his touch, his kisses, the way his tongue feels against yours - hot and wet and perfect. He moves his arm around you again, picks you up as if you weigh nothing, carrying you over to the bed where he drops you, your eyes wide as you stare up at him. There is no light in the room beside the one coming from outside, making him look angelic. His carefully styled hair is falling into his face now, his lips red from your kisses. His pupils are blown out and the look in his eyes runs shivers down your spine. You watch as he gets rid of his jacket and belt, following his movement as you sit up a little bit, skillfully opening the belt with your gun and leaving it on the floor next to the bed, feeling the mattress move the next second as Seokmin lowers himself onto the bed. Your hands find his nape once more just as he presses his lips against yours again, hands roaming from your hips to your stomach and under your shirt, gripping your breasts one by one and moaning into your mouth when his thumb feels the stiff nipple underneath your bra. 

His tongue licks against yours again, your back arching against him as he moves to kiss down your neck, biting and licking and kissing all the same. When he hears your sounds, he feels himself growing harder, his composure almost breaking as he takes off your shirt with your help, shoving the cups of your bra to the side to dip down and suck your nipple into his mouth, your legs wrapping around his waist as you push him closer to you, teeth sinking into you bottom lip. It feels like electricity between you, the way he touches you sends shocks through your body in the best way possible. 

“God, I can’t believe I have you under me again, fuck,” Seokmin breathes against your neck now, his breath tickling you. “Been thinking about you so much, you know? About how much more I know now… how I can make you cum, baby, eat your sweet pussy and have you scream my name.”

His words send another wave of shivers down your body and you nod, wishing for nothing more than for your and his clothing to land on the floor. 

“Seokmin… just want you to fuck me, please, need you so so bad.” 

He groans, cock twitching and he finally moves to open his pants. It’s all hurried and a little bit frantic, the way you pull on his shirt next and the way your bra basically gets ripped off your frame by him. It drives you crazy, how he kisses you, pushing you further up the bed, your head hitting the pillow as he devours your lips and tongue, his hand squeezing your tits over and over, his stiff cock right there between your legs, still caged in by his briefs. 

“How bad do you want it, hm?” He breathes out, his fingers now moving downwards, ending up over your clothed pussy, making you squirm.

“Fuck, so bad, Seokmin. Please.” 

He sucks on the skin underneath your ear and lets his fingers shove your panty to the side, sliding through your wet folds and moaning against you. You’re so wet, wet and ready for him. 

“I wonder if you still taste the same, baby,” he mumbles, continuing to let his fingers glide through your lips, letting one of them sink into you. Your pussy practically sucks him in, eager to feel him inside. Seokmin kisses you again and your nails are dragging along his back as your hips move against Seokmin’s digit inside of you. 

“M-more, want more of you,” you cry out when you come up for air and Seokmin nods, letting a second finger slide in too, fully finger fucking you now as he smothers your neck with more kisses, preceding to suck marks onto the sensitive skin of your breasts, your whimpers becoming more and more frenzied. You need his cock and you need it now. So, you let your hand wander down, grabbing around the wrist of his hand that is currently fucking you.

“Want your cock, Seok… fuck me with your cock.” His eyes meet yours, gaze almost crazy as he curses under his breath, nodding before pulling his fingers out of you, bringing them to his mouth to suck them clean - making you whimper in the process. He licks his lips after.

“Still so tasty, baby… all for me.” 

He kisses you one more time, deep and emotional and dizzying, before finally ridding himself of his briefs and you of your panties, hand pumping his length a few times. You watch and swallow, remembering how he had felt back then. He had been your first. And now he was going to claim back what he had made his so many years ago. 

When he sinks into you, both of you cry out in pleasure, his arms on the mattress next to your head and his lips kissing your cheek, chin and lips. You are still hugging him close, fingers pressing into his nape and back. His first thrust is deep and slow and your eyes roll back, a long moan escaping your kiss-bruised lips. He can’t keep going slow, he knows that. As hard as he tries - he knows he won’t be able to control himself. Which leads to his thrusts becoming faster, to his moans becoming louder and your pussy clenching around him more often. It’s hot and wet and quick, it’s making you feel like you’re in a dream, his teeth sinking into your flesh, your cries spurring him on. Your legs are around his hips, his cock hitting you right where you need it to with every thrust and when you feel his hand sneaking in between you, thumb pressing down on your clit, rubbing it in perfect circles, you know you won’t last long. 

“You feel so good, baby, take my cock so fucking well.” He moves, on his knees in front of you now, your legs over his shoulders the next second. The new angle makes you see stars, especially with his thumb still on your clit.

“F-fuck, Seok! I’m so close.” Your cry makes him smirk, his movements becoming less and less controlled, as he is chasing both of your releases. You give up on keeping your eyes open, enjoying the way he feels, the way he hits you right where it feels so incredibly good. Your body is on fire, everything feels more intense and if you had the capacity in your brain you’d probably worry about exploding. 

And you do - you explode only a few seconds later, your orgasm hitting you hard, leaving you to cry out his name, nails back in his skin, leaving clear marks that he will be proud of later. 

“That’s right, baby, look at you, so pretty coming on my cock, fuck,” Seokmin feels you pulsate around him, feels how your pussy clenches over and over, milking him for all he has and there isn’t anything he can do but reach his own high, cum shooting out his cock and into your spent core. He collapses on top of you, your legs falling off his shoulders, spasming at the intensity of your climax. His breath is right there in your ear and you finally open your eyes again, fingers moving to stroke through his hair. You stay like this for a while, just catching your breath, feeling him so close after so long. Only when he slips out of you, laying down next to you, his lips pressing a kiss to your cheek, do you regain some senses. Smiling at him, you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. 

When you come back out, Seokmin is asleep. Chuckling, you pick up his shirt from the floor and slip it over your head before laying back down, cuddling into his side and letting yourself drift off into a dreamless sleep. 

For Seokmin it’s not a dreamless sleep, though. It hasn’t even been two hours he’s been asleep when he wakes up, cold sweat covering his body. He looks down and sees you peacefully sleeping right beside him, one of your hands on his bare stomach, the other under your own cheek. In any other case he would have loved to look at you for as long as he could, but this isn’t like any other case. 

The man, he thinks, the man we saw yesterday. Seokmin gets up, careful not to wake you up, grabbing his underwear from the floor, just like his pants. You’re in his shirt so he has no other choice but to leave the room with his chest still bare. His feet carry him out the room and to the small entrance space, right to the phone where he dials Bream’s number again. The second someone picks up, Seokmin begins talking.

“It’s the son, Sir, the Travises son - he’s the unsub.”

The area in front of the farm hasn’t been this busy in years. There are cop cars everywhere, a S.W.A.T team is about to arrive. Seokmin has his hands pushed into his pockets as he talks to his superior officer. You are standing further away next to Matthew and Yuqi, listening to Hyunwoo’s orders. 

Seokmin had recognised the son, Henry, from the pictures at the house. You feel stupid for not realizing it sooner. 

“Don’t linger on those feelings, Y/N,” Hyunwoo says, “it had been a long day.”

Yes, a long day that ended with you being too horny to do your job properly. You don’t tell him that of course. Instead, you press your lips together and just nod. 

Henry is inside the barn now, the barn you and Seokmin found the secret door in last night. His parents and the missing girl, Kelly, are with him. It’s a classic hostage situation and yet even your team is at a loss of words. It all doesn’t make sense right now. Why is Henry doing this? You let your gaze flicker over to the barn, wondering what he is doing to them right now. 

The head of the S.W.A.T team is walking over to Hyunwoo now. They apparently arrived just now

“We are ready for your orders, Sir,” he says, shaking Hyunwoo’s hand. Your boss nods.

“Alright, thank you. I’ll let you know when you can go in.” The man leaves again after that and you look at Hyunwoo, unsure.

“We need him alive, don’t we?”

“In theory, yes. But it’s not always easy, you know that. Whatever is going on inside of him, we will only find out if we get him out, but we need to look at the bigger picture. We need to figure out what his deal is.”

Just then, Jungwoo arrives at the scene, carrying a white box. 

“You won’t believe this,” he says, putting the box on top of the police car next to you. Seokmin is suddenly next to you, his arm brushing against yours and making you shiver. You ignore the effect once again. 

“Henry Crawl, 36, was adopted by the Travises when he was 9 years old. It says here that his mother committed suicide and the Travises took him in - Mrs. Travis being is paternal aunt. She felt responsible for him, considering the father left right after his birth and his mother died.”

“So, they aren’t his biological parents. They didn’t mention that.” Seokmin frowns. 

“Which means that there is a chance his mother was part of this cult. Is there an autopsy report for his mum?” You take step closer to the box and Jungwoo nods, handing you the document. Scanning it, your eyes widen as suddenly the reason for all of this is starting to make sense. 

“There were signs of abuse - of years of abuse. Scars, bruises, internal damages.” You shake your head, “he isn’t killing women because he hates them. He kills them because he is avenging his mother.”

“She was part of the cult, probably around the same time as the parents of the girls. They probably knew about the abuse and he somehow figured it out.” Matthew chews on his bottom lip as he shoves his glasses up his nose. 

“We need to talk to him. Need him to let the girl go as well as his parents.” Hyunwoo looks over at the truck where all the special units are gathered. He excuses himself and goes over to them. The atmosphere shifts, there are nervous droplets of sweat running down your face. The storm might have stopped, but it’s still slightly drizzling down on you. Seokmin’s hand finds the small of your back. You flinch, your head turning to look at him wide eyed.

“It’s gonna be okay, we’re going to get them out of there,” his voice is soothing you, as much as you hate to admit it. You swallow down whatever you’re thinking and shake his hand off, before walking over to Hyunwoo and the special forces, leaving Seokmin behind.

“I want to talk to him.” Your voice breaks through the conversation Hyunwoo is having with the captain. Both of them look at you, eyebrows raised.

“Y/N-,” Hyunwoo starts, but you interrupt him.

“You know it has to be me. I am roughly the same age as his mother was back then. I am a woman. I know what is going on inside his head. Please, Sir, let me do this.”

If there had been more time, maybe they would have argued with you. But there isn’t any time. And so, they nod. As much as it makes you nervous, you also know that you’re right. You’re confident that you can do this, that you have the ability to save this girl and Henry’s parents. Taking a deep breath, you look over at Seokmin, who’s eyes speak more than a thousand words. He knows why you walked over there and he knows that you are the only one for the job. The smile on his lips reassures you more than you want to admit. 

Not even five minutes later you have a walkie-talkie in your hand. The other one landed in the barn roughly a minute ago. Now, you’re waiting for Henry to respond after your first attempt at contact. The rain is still falling softly, the sun nowhere to be seen in the sky. It’s early, you’re not sure how early, but you estimate it to be sometime after 6 am. 

“I won’t let them go!” The voice coming from the device in your hand brings you back to the here and now, blood rushing in your ears.

“Henry, hello, it’s good to hear your voice,” you say softly, looking over at one of the windows of the barn, wondering if he is watching you.

“I don’t- I won’t let them go,” he repeats and you lick your dried out lips.

“Okay, Henry. I hear what you’re saying, alright? You don’t want to let them go. Could you tell me why?”

“They need to pay for their sins!” It’s not hard to make out that he’s enraged, crying, but still hurt and confused. 

“What are their sins, Henry? Can you tell me?” You look over your shoulder at the rest of your team, Hyunwoo nodding at you and you nod back.

“You- you really want to know?” The shift in his voice tells you that your question had been exactly what he wanted to hear. 

“Yes, Henry. I want to know, I want to understand.”

There is silence on the other line for just a few moments. You remain calm and don’t ask again. It’s important you give him space, important for the hostages as well as to earn his trust. 

“They- they knew about my mum. My adoptive parents. I heard them say it. They knew why the police came to visit. It was because of her, because of mum. She was tortured by them, by the whole cult! And everyone who knew about it and didn’t do anything needs to be punished.” His voice is shaking as he speaks and you wonder if the hostages are in the room with him or if he has them hidden underneath the barn in one of the rooms you found last night.

“You’re doing this for your mum, Henry? You’re avenging her life?”

“Yes!”

“I understand. You did well, Henry. You hurt them the way they hurt you. They should have never taken your mother from you, Henry, that was wrong of them,” the words leaving your mouth aren’t what you’re actually thinking, but they will do the trick. Henry will trust you, he will listen to what you have to say.

“I- I did this for her. I wanted her to know I never gave up on her. B-but-,” he stops and you hear a sob, sure now that he is indeed crying. 

“But? You can talk to me Henry, I am here for you.” You bite your lip, hoping you’re not pressing the matter too far.

“B-but…,” Henry starts again, “but he- he betrayed me. He told me- he told me they were the only one’s at fault. He told me he wanted to avenge her too…”

He? You once again turn to your team, all of their faces in frowns. 

“Who is “he”, Henry?” 

No answer. Henry isn’t responding. You feel a slight panic arise inside of you. 

“Henry, it’s okay. You don’t need to tell me, okay? Just- tell me about you, about your mum. You must miss her dearly, right?” 

“My mum deserved better than what she got. She shouldn’t have killed herself, she should have fought through it! But she couldn’t. She was so scared of what they had done to her, what he had done to her! I wanted them all to suffer, wanted them all to know what it feels like losing someone they love. And I did that, I did that to him too!” He gets louder with every word. 

“Henry, you’re frustrations are valid. But, please, it is enough. You’ve showed them, you’ve hurt them. Enough people have died, Henry. Let your parents and Kelly go and you will be free.”

Henry is silent for a short while again.

“If he doesn’t respond, we’ll go in,” the S.W.A.T team’s leader is now saying to Hynwoo and latter holds up his hand, as if to signal to give it more time.

“Henry? Can you do that for me?” You ask again. Everyone is growing more and more uneasy, the more time passes. Your hands are sweaty and you feel like the rain isn’t the reason for why your clothes are damp again. Just when Hyunwoo is about to take his hand down, to let the special unit do their job - the doors of the barn open and Kelly runs out, the Travises right behind her. They all seem completely out of it but there are clear signs of relief on their faces. Seokmin and Stolper run towards them, helping them when they see, that Mr. Travis is limping and both women are spurting wounds on their face. You close your eyes and take a deep breath before pressing the button to talk again.

“Henry? Henry, are you there?” 

“My parents always loved me. They raised me when mum died. But they knew, you know. They knew! Which means, they need to suffer, too.” 

Your heart skips a beat when you throw the walkie-talkie to the side and run towards the barn, your team right behind you. You don’t think you’ve ever run as fast as you do right now. The air is tight around you and its rough to breathe. 

Henry is right there at the back of the barn, holding a gun to his head. You scream and Hyunwoo shoots forward to tackle him down - but it’s too late. The shot is heard but your eyes are closed, your knees growing weak but you stay standing. Henry is dead even before he hits the floor and there is nothing you can do. 

The hostages are free, so it counts as a win. The Manhattan Slasher is finally caught. He lays there, dead on the ground. He is getting carried away now, by two coroners who present you with a nod as you wait for Matthew and Jungwoo to come back upstairs. You hadn’t felt like you could go downstairs and see whatever Henry had left for you to find. 

You're sitting outside now, seeing Seokmin approach you, with a file in his hands. You look up at him, blinking against the rain. When he stands in front of you, it’s almost like the sun showed its face after all. He isn’t smiling, though. He just radiates this energy that immediately gets your spirits up.

“The judge,” he says, handing you the file, “it’s all in here. He was the one controlling Henry. Told him all those parents were the reason his mum suffered. And while it’s not all a lie - the judge himself was the actual perpetrator.”

With a slightly shaking hand, you reach for the file and open it, reading through what is evidence of Seokmin’s words. Now, this was something neither you nor your team has predicted. You swallow down a set of tears.

“He used Henry. But for what?”

“My guess is as good as yours, but, if I may try myself at your job: They probably got fed up with his shit. Told him they would rat him out to the police if he didn’t turn himself in for abusing that woman. He began killing their children as a way to keep them quiet. My guess is, that he has been keeping them quiet ever since Henry’s mum committed suicide and they all only recently began to wonder if maybe this was wrong.” 

Seokmin’s words reach your brain and they make sense as much as they don’t. You’ve been working this job long enough to know that there will never be something as full closure. People act irrationally all the time, do things no one understands. There is nothing you can do about it but wait it out, wait for the injustice to die down within you. In the end there is no point to try and understand people like this. Not that these parents deserved to have their daughters get killed. 

You thank Seokmin with a small nod and he sits down next to you. Next there will be the arrest of the judge. Then the parents will be questioned, and will get a punishment of their own because they didn’t stop the murders when they had the chance. You know they couldn’t because they were scared, but the law is clear. 

You feel Seokmin’s hand capturing yours and you look over at him. The business around the farm isn’t done yet. Boxes get carried and there is more forensic personnel than you’ve seen in a while, probably taking apart the basement you and Seokmin had found. It should be relief you’re feeling but right now you’re just tired. 

So, when Seokmin pulls you against him, arm around your waist, you don’t even try to stop yourself from laying your head on his shoulder and closing your eyes. 

header by @wongyuseokie.

[cassidyandonlycassidy]

no one man should have all that power

miguel o'hara x reader

words: 2k

warnings: 18+ only!!!, smut, NONCON!, RAPE!, size difference (canon, miguel just big as hell), DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT, dark!miguel, p in v sex, threats, mentions of anal, cleaning lady!reader, attempted rape by not miguel/attempted mugging

your focus is half on your phone playing the local news through your headphones, and half on scrubbing down the sink in front of you. 

you don't move on until it's spotless. perfectly clean. you're willing to use every tool in your arsenal considering this is your pickiest client.

you are about to spray down the shower and allow the chemicals to soak and do part of the work for you, when the news anchor shifts the conversation.

“and to discuss the issue of spiderman, please welcome nypd captain charleston and queens resident andrea roberts.”

your attention shifts fully to your phone. andrea begins, a sweet looking older lady who explains that spiderman saved her from being mugged. you feel your heart beat faster when they flash images of him on screen, his wide shoulders, dark black and red suit hugging his body and abs.

“and what happens when spiderman begins to ask for something in return? he saves you from being mugged, but then demands a payment. what happens when he starts to use his powers for evil instead of good? we must focus on unmasking him and stopping his crusade of the city. no one man should have all that power.”

you have to reach quickly to shut your phone off, powering down the screen and turning off the captains words as your client enters the bathroom.

“almost done?” she asks, a frown on her overfilled lips, shining with a lipgloss to distract from the fact that her skin is almost painfully stretched.

“yes ma’am.” you nod. “just the shower is left.”

“hmm…” you wait for her to find a critique, even the tiniest speck of dust that you missed, but she's unable to as she sighs dramatically. “i have a party to get to. see yourself out, the door will lock behind you.”

“and payment?” you hate having to ask just from the way her eyes turn dark, clearly annoyed with your questions, and while she may be one of your worst clients, she's also one of your best paying. 

“on the kitchen counter.” she says before turning on her bright red heels and stomping away.

you sigh and turn your phone back on, frowning when you realize the spiderman coverage is already over before turning your attention to the shower.

--

you're whistling to yourself as you head home, needing the music to keep you from deciding to just pass out on the nearest bench, and you don't dare put your headphones in after the sun has set.

a full day of cleaning apartments from the elite of the city, and now you have to head back to your tiny one.

you clutch your tote bag further into your side, knowing there's cash from the few clients who refuse to prepay with a credit card until they see the work you've done, despite never leaving a client unsatisfied.

“hey pretty lady.” you're used to the cat calls, so you just keep walking past the man, not acknowledging him even when you hear him push off the wall and follow you, footsteps heavy and far too close for your liking.

“i said hey!” he shouts, voice turning aggressive. you look around, but there's no one else on the empty street but a few distant cars. “bitch, you gonna be nice and say hello back?”

the man grips your shoulder and forces your feet to stop. your eyes widen as you come face to face with him, his eyes furious and breath smelling of alcohol.

“hello.” you whisper out, hoping that's all it will take for him to leave you alone, but of course it's not as he shoves you into the dark alley between two apartment buildings.

“since you wanna be a bitch, you can get on your knees and suck my dick.” he's too strong as he shoves you down onto your knees, roughly hitting the pavement as you cry out, hoping someone hears you.

“and you can give me all your money too, whore.”

“now that's not a way to talk to a woman.” 

the voice makes both of you jump as you turn to see spiderman emerge out of the shadows, even taller than you pictured him.

the drunk man scatters before spiderman can get any closer.

“th-thank you, spiderman.” you know you must sound pathetic right now, voice breathy and still on your knees as he steps closer.

when his hand reaches down, you don't hesitate to place your hand in his and allow him to pull you to your feet.

“are you alright?” his voice is soft and smooth like butter and it makes you swoon even more.

“thanks to you.” you know you're blushing as you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, one hand still clasped in his.

“and what about thanks?” spiderman leans down. “would you give me a kiss to thank me?”

“i-yes.” you don't think about what it means as the area around his mouth and chin disintegrates, showing off his strong jaw and plump lips.

despite him being almost bent over, you still have to raise yourself onto your tiptoes to press your lips against his.

the kiss that you meant to be soft and sweet is quickly intensified as he pulls you up, arms wrapping around you to hold you effortlessly in the air as his mouth devours yours.

“wait!” you pull away, eyes widening when you realize that at some point the rest of the disguise covering his face has also been pulled away.

he's even more handsome than you could have imagined. perfect cheekbones leading to a strong nose, his eyes big and brown, showing all the intensity behind them.

“what?” he huffs out, annoyed that the kiss ended so soon.

“i-i don't even know your name.” you admit shyly. while you're alright with giving spiderman a soft kiss as a thank you, you're not sure how you feel about the hot and heavy make out session.

“im spiderman, isn't that enough?” he frowns at you, wishing you would just shut up so he can do as he pleases.

“i-”

spiderman leans back in, attacking your lips with his. you don't know what to do, your feet are so far off the ground, and his arms are holding you so tight to his defined chest.

you relax and just allow it to happen, allow his mouth to press kiss after kiss against yours.

you let out a gasp when spidermans hand grips your chest, shifting your weight to one arm around your waist.

the open mouth allows his tongue to push inside, dominating the kiss in a whole new way as his palm rubs against your boobs.

“i-” you try to pull away, but to no avail as he's not willing to let you out of the kiss. 

spiderman moves until your back is pressed against the brick wall, his other hand dropping to your ass, holding you up that way instead.

his hand is so big, fingers stretching so far that he only has to press a bit more between your thighs to be against your pussy.

“how else are you gonna thank me, pretty?” he asks, finally letting you take a deep breath, his hand still squeezing your tits over your shirt.

“i don't want to do this anymore!” you squeal out now that you're able to talk.

“what?” his voice turns dark. “i saved you and you don't want to thank me?”

“i just want to go home!” you plead. you know there's no point in screaming or trying to run.

“not until you give me a proper thank you.” he growls out. “but since im feeling nice tonight, ill let you choose. should i fuck you or settle just for you sucking me off?”

“you can't do this!” you try to wiggle out of his hold, but he's too strong. 

“i can. who is gonna stop me?” the chuckle that escapes his mouth sounds like pure evil.

“i know what you look like! ill tell everyone. ill go to the news, to the police-”

“you think they'll believe you? im spiderman. i rule this city.” he shakes his head like he's disappointed in you for even mentioning it.

“but-” he continues on. “since you've taken so long to answer, ill just have to fuck you.”

you manage to get out one yell, one shout, one plead for no before spidermans mouth is back on yours.

his hand does move to cup your pussy, thick fingers sliding against your core. you feel your pussy wetten from the movements, traitorous and betraying your true intentions.

you whimper against his lips as your pants are ripped away along with your underwear, literally tearing them easily off your body.

he must have disintegrated or called back part of his suit, you have no idea how the technology works, and you certainly have no interest in figuring it out now as you feel his cock slide through your folds.

spiderman has to pull away to slide you lower, your back moving down the brick wall as his strong hands guide your hips until his cock is against your entrance, poking in.

“you're- you're too big.” you try again to plead with him. “you'll tear me in half.”

he just shrugs, a smirk even twitching at the corner of his lips as he pushes you down, hips rising up to sink you down onto his cock.

you cry out, head falling back as he continues to move, feeling like it's never ending as he continues to split your insides to make room for him.

“shit!” spiderman shouts out. “you're so tight.”

you want to say it's because you're not turned on, that you don't truly want this, but you don't want to anger him even more as his hips begin to thrust up into you.

you cry out, tears beginning to stream down your cheeks. it's not as painful after a minute, your pussy adjusting to his length and girth as he fucks you without abandon.

spiderman steps away from the wall and switches so his back is pressed against it as he begins to move you up and down, using you as he would a toy to pleasure himself, but instead of thrusting into plastic, he's pushing repeatedly into your cunt.

you lean forward, hands balancing against his defined chest, needing the stability as your body is forced into taking his cock.

“please!” you cry out.

“quit crying or it'll get worse.” you're not sure how it could get worse until the hand on his hip moves, moving between your ass cheeks and pressing a finger against your other hole.

“im sorry.” you quickly say, looking up in fear that just spews spiderman faster, pumping you up and down without even breaking a sweat.

“so warm and wet.” he smiles down. “are you sure you don't want this?”

you stay silent, hoping the experience ends soon as you feel his cock swelling inside of you, pushing against your walls.

“you gonna cum with me?” he asks, other hand reaching to swirl around your clit. you wish his rough fingertip didn't feel so good against your sensitive bud.

“i don't want to.” you whimper out, entire body slumping forward as you struggle to remain in control, feeling your hips begin to shake and the way your cunt clenches around his length.

“you're gonna. come on.” the bouncing, the movement of your body up and down and the way you're practically speared onto his cock is all too much as you let out a squeal, cumming hard just as spiderman does as well, shooting his seed inside of you, feeling like it's right into your womb from how deep it is.

“oh, fuck.” he moans out. “now that was a good thank you.”

he pulls you off his cock and places you back onto the ground where your legs instantly crumple, landing in a heap against the concrete.

“don't forget your bag.” spiderman kicks your tote bag that had fallen off your shoulder towards you, spewing the cash all over the ground.

you look up at him, fear no longer in your eyes, replaced with anger and disgust. you know nothing will happen to him, but from this moment on, taking down spiderman will be your only goal.

no one man should have all that power.

[service4cops]

Right: "Did you get your blowjob?"

Left: "Yeah, all good."

Now he can stop by, relax, and enjoy a good servicing himself, having had his men taken care of.

Just another of New York's Finest showing why they're so deserving of a dedicated oral service.

[terranceholdsapencil]

Every once in a while I remember Elementary exists and them I get into it alot and like??? Easily the best modern sherlock depiction ever. How faithful? Ill be honest, I havent properly read the books and also this is a modern sherlock working with the NYPD in New York (with watson being an asian-american woman whos not a war veteran and I love her) so how faithful can it be? But the *best*.

Sherlock is so unbelievably human and this show managed to make Watson a woman and NOT shove her and Sherlock in an obligatory heteronormative relationship. Yes when I was younger I was into BBC sherlock too. But that shit sucks (doesnt mean its not enjoyable). If you want a great moriarty, watch elementary. If you want a great watson, watch elementary. If you want a great sherlock, WATCH ELEMENTARY.

Also I dont personally know any recovering drug addicts to that capacity but his addiction is so REAL. The looming dread of a potential relapse, how much an addiction changes your life and although it obviously gets less important as the show goes on how it will always affect you.

Its funny

And its EMOTIONAL

And the cast is phenomenal and Jonny Lee Miller has got me biting my nails for the way he plays sherlock and his tics and posture and quirks.

I will probably after another day or two forget about and lose interest in this show again until the monster is awakened in another few months or year or so but GOD

CBS elementary > BBC Sherlock and its NOT EVEN CLOSE. Not a BIT.

(Btw the first season has a buildup and dread and weight and its got twists and I cannot explain how GREAT this first season is. Like. So great. Oh my god.)

[jungle-angel]

Random Sentry Headcannons That Have Been Brewing in The Cauldron Of My Brain (Robert Reynolds/Sentry x Reader)

Tagging: @floydsmuse @withahappyrefrain @callmemana

Warnings : SMUT!!!!! Ya'll know the rules for this, minors will be yeeted from the treehouse!!!!

When you first met Robert Reynolds, it was totally not what you expected

You and a friend were out for drinks one night and some pervert started hitting on you. It got out of hand really fast but stopped the minute you saw two guys walk up from the other end of the bar and surrounded him

Robert very gently guided you away and left Steve Rogers to deal with him. Turns out Steve was more than eager to deal with him since he had been hitting on Beth, Steve's girlfriend who worked at the local Starbucks up the street. Steve may be very calm, cool and collected but damn if the Fighting Irish ain't strong with this one

You got to talking to Robert after Steve had dealt with the pervy creep (turns out two of his buddies in the NYPD were off duty and saw the whole thing and arrested the idiot thereafter). Robert had it pretty rough before he had joined the Avengers

Finding his niche in the group hadn't been easy either. It took Tony, Thor, Bruce and Steve at least three tries to convince Robert to stay with everybody in Avengers Tower

You couldn't stop smiling when Robert asked for your number and the way his face turned red

The first time he called was when you got off work. You two must have talked on the phone for a good two and a half hours

Your first date was spent at the local movie theater which was doing a reshowing of all those cheesy 80s fantasy movies. You guys kept making dirty jokes about the snacks and popcorn

Which led to you two annoying the hell out of an obnoxious, entitled couple in the row in front of you. Robert stuck the big chug of soda you two had been sharing between his legs and it looked like you were giving him a blowjob complete with slurpy noises and everything

Needless to say after the second date which included an awesome dinner at one of the local places, you and Robert were.......shall we say......becoming well acquainted with each other 🤭🤭🤭🤭

Oh yeah, you guys were waiting for a ride back to Avengers Tower and started making out on the side of the building. Robert started sucking and biting at your neck, making you moan and not giving a single shit as to who saw, even as he pinned you against the wall. The ride never showed by the time you were done but Robert had a much better idea

He picked you up bridal style and literally flew you back to the tower

But when he got you in his bedroom there?? BOW CHICKA WOW WOW!!!!!!

Robert LOVES to fuck you so, so slowly. He loves hearing you moan and the feeling of sliding his cock in and out of you

He's packin too!!! You caught him dancin in his shorts in front of the mirror the morning after and you were all 👀👀👀👀

You and Robert have had a "sex off" with everybody and their wives/girlfriends because they were bein too loud on the other side of the wall

During said sex-off, serious shenangians ensued. Both Thor and Jane and Bruce and Betty almost punched holes in the wall from how hard they were goin at it. That was also the first time you guys heard Steve drop an F-Bomb, after he and Beth had accidentally rolled off the bed. Carol Danvers and Mike Rossi however, was due to Goose the cat, thinking that Mike was attacking his owner. You and Robert will literally ask F.R.I.D.A.Y to play "Cat Scratch Fever" by Ted Nugent every time he walks into the room.

You moved into Avengers Tower after you and Robert decided that living together was the best thing for you both

And because he had grown to love you so, so deeply

Your gentle little touches and kisses meant everything to him. He craved them so badly during the day and when you would get home from work, he'd kiss you to the point where he'd be in tears

So one night after about a year and a half of dating, Robert took you to a little spot on Bow Bridge in Central Park. The leaves had already started falling and it was a chilly autumn evening

You absolutely cried when you saw the ring and he popped the question. Thor and Jane had done some summer traveling back to Asgard and he personally asked the dwarves to make the ring. It was a silver and diamond replica of Galadriel's ring from Lord Of The Rings and the diamonds looked like a flower but it glowed whenever Robert was nearby

You guys got married that summer with everybody in attendance. Carol, Jane, Natasha, Betty, Beth, Pepper, Wanda and Laura Barton were all your bridesmaids and even little Miss Morgan Stark took her role as your flower girl very, very seriously

Tony let you guys have full run of the Malibu house and you and Robert made sure that you thoroughly christened the house. You even left a note for Tony that said "sorry we fucked in the pool last night"

You and Robert have had your days, both good and bad together

But for the most part your married life has been peaceful and happy

A common saying in Avengers Tower, "never saw one without the other did you?"

And for the most part it's true

[storiesofsvu]

Christmas Admirer

Elizabeth Donnelly x reader warnings: language, argument, minor stalking. Look! I did a thing! Thank you for the ko-fi and the request!! I hope this lives up to expectations lol. Covers the "fight before xmas" square for bingo. I'm slowly getting back into it y'all! I wanted to get a lot more done for bingo but I hate to admit I don't think I'm gonna get much done, which sucks. I still have the creative spurts but I think I'm so wrapped up in NCIS that other characters have fallen down the list lol. I'll do my best to get the more developed ideas out for bingo! Love y'all!

The first time it happened, you didn’t think a thing about it. Liz always had new staff in the early fall, clerks, paralegals, assistants, secretaries, baby prosecutors that you hadn’t met yet. Those who had graduated college and wanted some on the job experience before law school, those who had graduated law school and were killing time before being able to write the Bar. There was never a shortage of strange faces around Hogan Place, so you breezed through the halls with no worries, a handful of files tucked under your arm and two coffees balanced in your hand as you approached her office door.

“I wouldn’t!” The voice rang out from the desk situated outside of Liz’s office and you stalled in your steps, letting out a small laugh.

“I’m sure it’s fine. She’s expecting me.”

“That was probably before she found out Anderson lied about having a warrant.” The man winced slightly and you let out a sigh right before Liz’s voice boomed through the glass, clearly upset and about to tear Anderson a new one.

“Guess so.” You dropped down into a chair opposite the man’s desk, placing the coffees down on it, files on your lap as you tugged out your phone. “This the only headache she’s had to deal with today?”

“Aside from the damage control that’ll go along with it, I think so.”

“Great.” Your head tilted back as you let out a groan, there went your dinner plans.

You didn’t catch it, the way his eyes were lingering on you, examining the folders in your lap, recognizing them as legal ones, an NYPD logo stamped on the second one in the pile just peeking its way out. How he was putting together that you were in the legal field, but no badge or gun meant you weren’t a cop. How casual you were in the space meant you’d been here plenty of times before. His gaze dragged up your body, watching your hand reach out for your coffee cup, nearly frowning that you were using your right, your left hidden under the pile of files and he’d have to resort to a verbal tactic to figure out more.

“How long has Anderson been in there?” You asked, swallowing down your coffee.

“Oh, uh? Only a few minutes before you got here.” He replied, “I could always take a message Mrs…?”

You barked out a laugh, turning toward him with a grin on your face, “please, it’s Ms. Parker.” He stuck his hand out over his desk and you took it, shaking while he smiled.

“Thomas, it’s nice to meet you.”

Your eyes surveyed him for a minute, flicking around the room before you spoke, “you got a nice looking name plate,” you gestured to the desk, “you’ve either been here a while or you’re planning on it.”

“Hoping to be.” He shifted in his chair, sitting more upright, “figured this was the best way to save up for law school.” He laughed awkwardly, “not that I’m freshly graduated or anything, I just didn’t figure things out right away, you know?”

“I do.” You laughed, glancing back towards Liz’s door where you could barely hear Anderson stammering along as she continued to lecture him.

“She always this intense?”

“Depends.” You picked up your coffee, taking another swig, “but Anderson… he’s annoying. He’s one of those ones that has an excuse for literally everything and none of them are valid. He’ll never own up to his actions or accept the consequences and shit like that pisses her off even more. If this case sinks, he’s done for.”

A small pause in the conversation while you both tried to eavesdrop and ignore the argument on the other side of the office wall before he spoke again, “sounds like you’ve known Donnelly a while.”

“Five years, give or take.” You replied, picking up your coffee again.

Though it was the last two that were the most significant, a year of back and fourth flirtation whenever you ran into each other until Melinda practically dragged you to some gala she was forced to attend and one thing led to another and confessions of true feelings were whispered into the night. You’d never expected to fall in love with someone like Liz and you’d definitely never thought someone like her would fall in love with you, yet here you were.

“Bet you know all the best ways to make it into her good books.” Thomas practically teased and you laughed.

“Work hard, pay attention, be ready on your feet and up to date as you can be on any open or upcoming cases. She’s big on loyalty, don’t let her catch you fraternizing with the enemy or sweet talking other departments or firms. If you’re thinking about switching jobs, let her know up front and she’ll give you the glowing recommendation you deserve, but if you do it behind her back, your options will be limited. Don’t be a suck up, but on a really bad day, the shrimp scampi from Forlini’s is a life saver,” you were suddenly cut off as the door flew open and Anderson came scurrying by without bothering to stop and you glanced back to Thomas, “and her coffee order is an Americano or drip with two packets of sweetener.” You picked up the untouched coffee, placing it down directly in front of him as you stood from your seat, “but I have a feeling she doesn’t need any more adrenaline boosts today and you just might.” You shot him a wink before scooping up your own coffee and stepping towards Liz’s ajar door, knocking on the frame.

“What?” She snapped as you pushed it open, offering her a warm smile and she let out a sigh from where she sat behind her desk, “sorry.”

“No need.” You swung the door shut behind you, moving through the room.

“What’re you doing here?” She asked softly, hand reaching out to squeeze at yours as you perched on the side of her desk.

“Had lunch with Sophie.” You shrugged, dropping the pile of files into her inbox, “figured I’d save her the ten minute drive.”

“One of these days you’re going to remember you’re a writer and not my assistant.” She teased as you leant down to steal a kiss.

“Speaking of…” you glanced behind you to the closed door, “you’ve got a new one.”

“He’s competent so far.” She sighed, leaning back in her chair, “unlike fucking Anderson.” You laughed, squeezing at her shoulder.

“He’s been in the hotseat for nearly a year, it’s about time they let him go.” You frowned slightly, “but I am guessing this means our dinner plans are off?”

Liz let out a heavy sigh, pinching at the bridge of her nose as she muttered “this is why I hate this job sometimes.” She glanced up at you, “yes.” Taking both of your hands in hers she smiled at you, “but that doesn’t mean I won’t spoil you. You go home, I’ll send dinner to your place, dessert too, and probably another million little gifts.”

“Liz, you really don’t have to.” You giggled, leaning down to kiss her.

“No sweetheart, I really do. We made these plans a while ago and I know how much you were looking forward to them.”

“Alright,” you slid off her desk, “fine. I’ll accept delicious, free dinner and treats but you better send me a picture of your dinner too, even if it’s in your office. I need you to not forget to eat.”

“And you really think you don’t take care of me?” She grinned up at you and you giggled again when she pulled you back to her for another kiss, “thank you for understanding.”

“Always.” You smiled, “and hey, don’t be too hard on that kid out there, he doesn’t seem so bad.”

“As long as he’s not Anderson.” She replied with an eye roll and you pulled the door open with a laugh, shooting a wave and a smile to Thomas as you sped through the office, leaving the room fast enough that you missed the way he ducked his gaze and his cheeks flushed pink.

**

The second time it happened, you were none the wiser, more focussed on getting your daily tasks done through the first snowfall of the year.

“God it is freezing out there.” You grumbled, letting out a little shiver as you shook the snow off your shoulders, “hope you guys have the heat on.” You reached out, placing a coffee cup down on Thomas’ desk.

“Got a portable one under my desk.” He replied with a slightly bashful smile.

“Good.” You shot him a wink, wrapping your hands around your own coffee and letting out a warm sigh.

“If it’s that cold out you should really have gloves on.”

“I know.” You groaned, rolling your eyes, “my friend’s dog chewed through my last pair this weekend, haven’t gotten around to a shopping trip yet.”

“She doesn’t give you any time off?” He asked with a frown, nodding toward Liz’s door and you laughed.

“She’s not my boss.” You tugged around in your purse for a moment, pulling out a business card, “I write kid’s books… well, primarily. I’ve been known to dabble into true crime too.”

He took the card from you, studying it for a minute before looking back up at you, “oh, that’s really cool. And… wildly different departments.”

You laughed, smiling softly at Thomas, “yeah, I guess they balance each other out well enough. Gotta splash some colour in that drab, cruel world, ya know?”

“Yeah.” He twirled the card around in his fingers, placing it down next to his cup of pens, “I’d love to pick your brain about it.”

“Really?” Your smile widened, taken aback by someone showing genuine interest into what you spent your time doing.

“Yeah. I’ll even buy you a drink, or a coffee, for your time? Tonight?”

“I can’t tonight.” Your nose scrunched and Thomas thought it was the cutest thing he’d seen all month, “got a thing. Friday?”

“Yeah, yeah! That’s perfect.”

“Well,” grinning, you gestured toward the card, “you’ve got my number.”

You scooped up your coffee, briefly knocking on Liz’s door before entering her office, letting the door swing shut behind you as you crossed the room.

“You’re late.” She chastised, half teasing while you leant over to kiss her cheek, your hand resting just past the collar of her shirt and she winced, “and your hands are freezing! What did I tell you about buying new gloves?”

“I’ll get around to it.” You rolled your eyes, laughing softly, “and how am I late if all I’m doing is playing errand boy for you?”

“Cleaners’ only open until three today.” She replied with a shrug pulling a claim ticket out of her desk and passing it to you.

“Good thing it’s only one then.” You replied with a grin, swiping the tag from her and popping it into your purse. “Your dress will be in one piece and ready to go at my place once you’re done here. You’ll have just enough time to go over your speech before we head out.”

“You’re a life saver.” She tugged you back to her to steal a kiss, wincing again at the temperature of your fingers. “Thank you.”

“Anytime.”

You got home with Liz’s dry cleaning over your arm and take out in your other (still bare) hand to find a gift bag sitting outside of your apartment door. You managed to scoop it up and once you got inside you discovered two pairs of very warm, cozy and luxurious gloves inside. A smile crept onto your cheeks and your body relaxed with warmth at the thought of Liz thinking of you on an already crammed busy day.

**

The third time you were slowly starting to pick up on it but brushed it off as friendliness. Thomas had agreed to buy you a drink to pick your brain over your work and you were more than excited to have someone who wasn’t your agent or publisher to talk to about the creative thoughts flying through your brain. You spent more than a few hours at a small table in the corner of a bar picking over appetizers and a few cocktails while you got to know each other a bit more. Thomas was new to town, spent the majority of his time working and thus didn’t really have a lot of friends in the city yet. You tried to pay for your half of the tab but he insisted it was his treat and you weren’t about to complain. When he offered to walk you home you figured he was just being friendly, cautious as a man should be about letting their companion go on alone at night in New York. You didn’t have to argue too much as you already had a car coming and assured that you would text once you were home safe.

**

The fourth time things started to happen you were so wrapped up in the holiday season you wouldn’t have noticed even if you had been looking for it. All of your shopping was done online to avoid crowded stores, there were small piles of packages outside your door daily, more Christmas cards than you could count flowing through your mail box. An array of little gifts from Liz, some signed with her initials, some wrapped with a ‘do not open until Christmas’ warnings, others bare in their Amazon boxes. Some were shipped, some were dropped off and it seemed to change every week.

Flowers, chocolates and candy were frequently left at your work desk, a treat for the entire office, trinkets from fans or avid readers, it was just what happened this time of year. It didn’t matter if it didn’t have a card, it was just a little boost to get through the cold snap and into the new year.

Figuring you should get a start on wrapping the gifts you were giving you started to sort through the boxes littered underneath the tree, finding a surprising amount of things that had been on your public wish list. You were stuck in an internal battle between setting a reminder to thank Liz in the morning or not mention anything considering they were likely supposed to be Christmas gifts and you eventually decided on the latter.

Just as you were finishing up, putting the final bow on the final present there was a knock at your door and you were surprised with dinner from your favourite place. You were a little taken a back with this one, considering it was one of the pricier places you really adored, but hey, it was Christmas time, Liz was working late and cancelled a date night, you weren’t going to complain about a pricey apology.

**

The fifth time it happened Thomas had been away from his desk when you arrived, you figured he was already gone for the night and headed straight to Liz’s office. That was where you discovered that she was having the utter day from hell, more than one prosecutor getting served thanks to playing out of line during their current cases. Meaning she now had to comb through both of their cases from start to where they were currently to find any violations, possibly take them over herself and help them find the appropriate counsel for the suits being filed.

She apologized profusely, promising that she would make it up to you later that weekend and you simply smiled, nodding gently and pressing a kiss to her cheek. You’d known what level of workload she had when you started dating and you reminded her that you knew this wasn’t exactly work from home over a glass of wine type of work. Reluctantly, you finally left her office, quietly shutting the door on your way out before your eyes flicked up and you spotted Thomas back at his desk beginning to pack things up.

“Figured you’d left already.” You greeted with a small smile.

“Oh, just a few last minute things she needed me to take over. Done now.” His eyes slowly raked up your body, taking in the heels, form fitting dress, jewelry and curled hair and he gulped, “you look… nice.”

“Thanks.” You huffed out a laugh, “dinner plans.”

“You didn’t get roped into this somehow, did you?” He asked, gesturing towards Liz’s office.

“Oh no.” You shook your head, pulling your phone out of your pocket when it pinged to read the text message and let out another sigh, “but my date did cancel on me.”

“Really? It’s practically Christmas.”

“Meh, happens.” You shrugged, pocketing your phone again.

“You know… I was just on my way out; my plan was leftover pizza. If you maybe wanted some company, we could grab a bite?” He offered and you hummed over it for a moment.

“You sure?”

“’Course.”

“That’d honestly be really nice, I’ve been cooped up alone in my home office all week and was looking forward to the company.” You glanced up to him, “but I’m paying this time!”

“Not after you got stood up.” He chuckled and you let out a small laugh.

“I had reservations at Trattoria Dell’Arte, it’s not exactly cheap. Let me get it.”

“Only if I take care of the drinks.”

“You’ve got yourself a deal.”

You likely would have noticed that he was flirting, not just being friendly if you hadn’t been so preoccupied up in your head. Between both of your jobs you and Liz hadn’t managed to see that much of each other recently and you were beginning to second guess yourself, thinking that she was simply just too tired to want to bother seeing you after a long week. That the extra work was a welcomed excuse to have to take a rain check yet again.

Instead you played nice, laughed at most of his jokes and contributed the best you could over dinner. Spending time with him wasn’t bad, he was decent enough company you didn’t mind it, you just would have preferred your girlfriend. He did try to snag the dinner bill but you were quicker, taking care of it on the way back from the restroom, leaving him with the agreed upon bottle of wine to settle up.

He once again offered to walk you home, or at least split a cab and you agreed on the latter considering it was a chillier night and you didn’t want either of you to get caught out in the snow. The heavier the incoming storm got, the fewer cabs there would be out on the streets, so it didn’t even cross your mind. You thought nothing of the rose he presented to you after you flagged down the cab considering the street peddler was pushy, the assertive in your face type that wouldn’t take no for an answer until you’d agreed to buy something from them. You’d even both laughed about it on the way home, talking about how guys like that used to target tourists more than the locals and when you reached your apartment you thanked him for the fun evening and hoped he had a great rest of his weekend.

With your back turned you missed the way his eyes followed you all the way up to the entrance to your building, a small smile on his cheeks as the fantasies began to play through his head, some of which were already playing out in real life right in front of him.

**

Stepping out of the cab you cautiously jogged up the stairs to Liz’s brownstone, careful to avoid the ice in your heels, coat open and flowing behind you as you briefly stopped to ring the bell before letting yourself in.

“I’ll be five minutes!” Her voice rang through from her upstairs office, “make yourself a drink.”

“Okay.” You called back, wiping off your shoes and shrugging off your coat to be hung on one of the hallway hooks.

Liz’s house was no stranger to you, it was your home away from home, a place you spent many weekends curled in her arms on the couch or tangled in her bedsheets as the sun crept in through the curtains. It felt homier that your apartment, the place you often opted to work from home when you needed to, the long days that she worked that you missed her, wanted to still feel surrounded by her even if she didn’t come home until long after you were asleep.

You crossed the living room to the bar cart, pouring yourself a gin and tonic to pass the time while she finished whatever it was she was doing. Sipping on the beverage you pulled your phone from your pocket, scrolling through a couple of apps and replying to a couple of messages while your gaze was distracted out the window, watching the snowfall start to get thicker, coating the streets with white fluff.

“Well don’t you look absolutely stunning.” Liz’s voice broke through the silence of the room and you turned back to her with a small laugh, the smile staying on your warm cheeks as she approached you. Her hand cupped your cheek, pulling you to her for a tender kiss that you couldn’t help but relax into.

“Thank you.” You smiled across at her, “figured I should look a little extra nice considering how many nights we’ve missed recently.”

“You know you don’t have to dress up for me.” Liz replied with a small smile, kissing your cheek gently as she squeezed at your hand, “but I do deeply appreciate it.” Her fingers tangled with yours, pulling your hand up to her lips to lay a kiss on the back of it.

“With the amount you spoil me it’s the least I could do.” You replied with a quiet laugh, draining your drink before placing the cup down on a side table. Liz hummed, her eyes dropping to your bracelet on the arm she still held up. Her gaze focused on it, eyes narrowing slightly as she examined it, her brow beginning to furrow. “What?” You asked, heart picking up in your chest as you watched her expression harden.

“This bracelet… it’s awfully personal.” Her hand dropped yours before circling your wrist, twisting your arm back and fourth to examine the jewelry.

“It’s my birthstone, yeah.” You laughed awkwardly “surrounded by yours.”

Her eyes examined it for a moment longer, pulling your wrist closer until she let out a small huff, “that’s not blue topaz, those are diamonds. They’re pulling the light from the sapphires, where did you get this?”

“You.” You chuckled again, feeling your heartbeat pick up in your chest, “one of those little secret Santa gifts you’ve been leaving.”

“It’s not from me.”

“Liz, there’ve been so many packages delivered I can’t even keep track of them, you probably ordered it months ago and forgot.”

“That’s Buccellati. I think I would remember spending that much money on you.” She scoffed, dropping your arm as she turned from you with an eye roll. “And half of those gifts were a don’t open until Christmas.”

“I just said I couldn’t keep track.” You retorted, feeling the annoyance beginning to build up through your veins.

“And I know that’s not from me.” She replied, frustration bubbling up inside of her, she’d been dealing with so much already she’d just wanted to have a nice night out and now this was ruining everything. Then again, maybe things had been ruined before she’d even realized, “diamonds mean someone born in April, or someone that likes you an awful lot and you don’t keep in touch with any family and not to offend but none of your friends could afford that.”

“I told you, it’s from you.” Your voice hardened and she laughed, shaking her head.

“Come on y/n, you’re better than that. That’s the oldest lie in the book.” She picked up a bottle of scotch, pouring out a few ounces and taking a swig as she spoke, “go around galivanting with someone else and when you get caught gaslight your partner into thinking it was them all along.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You’ve been so distant!” Her voice raised ever so lightly, tensing as she spoke, her mouth tightening in that all too familiar pissed off way. “I’ve barely seen you all month, you always wait until the morning to call me back, your texts are far and few in between and the few times I’ve tried to stop by your apartment you’re out! God.” She shook her head with a heavy laugh, “I don’t know how I didn’t put it together earlier that you were seeing someone else.”

“Did you just accuse me of cheating on you?!” Anger jolted through you as you immediately saw red, an offended scoff leaving your lips.

“Well how else would you explain it!?” Her hands flailed in your general direction.

“You’re the one who keeps cancelling fucking dates Liz! I’ve been completely accommodating of your work schedule and how demanding it’s been recently. You’ve barely seen me because you keep blowing me off! Sorry that I’m not at your beck and call, I was trying to give you space and time to regroup from work! I didn’t realize I was supposed to mope around my apartment and wait for you to find a sliver of time for me, sorry that I have other friends to spend time with who actually give a shit.”

“So you admit you’ve been seeing someone?”

“I’m not fucking doing this.” Your hands shot up in surrender, “you’re being insane all over a fucking bracelet.”

“A seven thousand dollar bracelet!” She snapped back, “what would you like to do, go through my bank records?”

“No.” Grabbing your coat you headed for the door, “you can do that yourself and wake up from this fucking delusion where I would cheat on you. I cannot believe you would ever accuse me of something like that, I thought you trusted me!”

The door was pulled open and you were halfway down the steps by the time she called after you, “fine! Walk out on another fucking date, no surprise there!”

**

Christmas Eve was finally upon you and instead of being out celebrating like you thought you would be, you were curled up in the bay window of your apartment watching the snow coat the city in a thick blanket. The remnants of Chinese takeout splayed across the coffee table while the television blared quietly in the background, some marathon of holiday movies still going.

Letting out a heavy sigh you picked up the bottle of wine from beside you, topping up your glass before taking a sip as your gaze redirected out into the night once again. You hadn’t heard from Liz in nearly two weeks, the two of you no doubt trapped in a game of ‘Say Uncle’, waiting for the other to admit they were wrong before any reconciling could begin. It wasn’t the first time you’d fought and if things started moving forward again you were certain it wouldn’t be the last, she was strong willed and always would be. You were hoping that this time in light of the holiday season maybe you would be getting an apology but it appeared she was digging her heels in, burying herself in work while trying to push the image of you with another woman out of her head rather than talking her way through it.

You’d spent some time thinking about it, imagining the last couple of months from Liz’s point of view and you were starting to maybe see where she was coming from. There had been more time apart than usual, more nights of cancelled dates spent apart rather than her coming home late from work to find you making her home warm and welcoming. You’d been busy, actually accepting the offers for holiday parties and meet ups with friends in town for the season rather than sitting around bored at home. But you reminded yourself that just because she might have had the excuse to be suspicious didn’t mean the argument and her accusation was justified.

Letting out another sigh as you sucked back your wine you were debating reheating some leftover Chinese, your stomach beginning to rumble when your attention was pulled to the door. Your head tilted for a moment, wondering if you were hearing things from the television or not but the second knocking came though loud and clear. A small groan escaped your lips as you untangled yourself from the blanket, stretching out stiff muscles as you padded through your apartment to the door, pulling it open to a very lavish bouquet of poinsettias and red and white roses, it was only after a moment that you realized who was holding it.

“Thomas?” You let out a huff, “seriously, she’s making you do her bidding on Christmas Eve? You deserve a break, and a raise. If she can’t be bothered to drop them off herself I don’t want them.”

“Her?” He asked with a tilt of the head.

“Liz.” You rolled your eyes, “I knew she liked having minions to do shit like this but this is so not cool.”

“Ms. Donnelly?” His nose scrunched, “no, these are from me.”

“Oh.” You stalled in your movement, taking a step back from the door to open it wider, “I guess… come in then.”

“Thanks.” He flashed you a smile, quickly stepping into the apartment, following you so he could place the bouquet down on the kitchen island.

“You know, you really didn’t have to bring me anything.”

“Well, you’re pretty big on Christmas, aren’t you?” He gestured around your apartment, eyes sweeping through the decorations, the large tree in the corner with piles of gifts wrapped underneath it, “everyone deserves a little bit of holiday cheer.”

“Yeah.” You sighed, smiling softly across from him.

“Besides, after I saw you were actually wearing the bracelet the last time you swung through the office I figured I should stop playing secret Santa and reveal myself.” His eyes flicked down to your wrist and a frown took over his face, “but… you’re not wearing it now.”

“Hmph,” you mumbled over a sip of wine, “Liz and I got into a big fight over it, kinda left a bad taste in my mouth.”

“Oh…” He stuttered a moment, wringing his hands while he gathered his words and you took another sip of your drink, “I thought it looked quite nice. You know, my birthday’s in April, always thought diamonds and sapphires complimented each other well.”

The wine glass in your hand paused halfway back to the kitchen island and you did your best to not let it show on your face as ice began to run through your veins. The wheels were spinning in your brain, trying to make it make sense and if there was ever a moment to trust your gut, you knew this was it. Before you could fully process everything Thomas spoke again,

“I like what you did with the shadowboxes,” he gestured to the wall above the television, “they had them in your favourite colour too, but I thought that might clash with the rest of the room. I’m glad the silver looks so nice.”

“Thanks…” The glass finally met the island gently as your fingers slipped off it, gripping the edge of the counter.

“Oh and that blanket!” His eyes lit up with excitement when he saw the one you’d previously been curled up in, “isn’t it the softest thing you’ve ever felt?” You nodded slowly, “bought one for myself when I picked it up.” He was nearly two steps into your living room by the time you found your voice, clearing your throat before you spoke.

“Hey Thomas…”

“Yeah?” He whipped around, a gleam in his eye and wide smile on his face.

“How did you know where I live?” You asked slowly, keeping your tone calm and cool in an attempt to keep him in the same mood he was in currently, completely unaware that the hair on the back of your neck was standing up.

“After our date at Trattoria we shared a cab.” He reminded you, “dropped you off first.”

“Date…” You nodded slowly, an unsure smile on your lips.

“Well,” he laughed, “I guess it would’ve been more of a date if you’d let me pay for dinner, but I’ll take what I can get.”

“Uh-huh.” You picked up your wine glass again, taking another sip as you watched him take in your apartment, “you know, my name’s not on a buzzer. You go knocking on everyone’s doors?”

“Nope.” He smiled brightly over at you, “told the cabbie to wait that night, wanting to make sure you got in alright. I saw your light flick on when you got in, just did my own investigative work to figure out which suite was yours.”

“I’ll add detective to your resume.” You gently teased and he chuckled, his fingers trailing over the back of your couch while his eyes dragged through your living room.

“Chow mein noodles…” he muttered, “I should’ve known.” He clicked his tongue, shaking his head at himself, “hope you didn’t mind the shanghai ones I had sent over.”

“Hmm?” Your brow raised in his direction as your stomach began to churn.

“A couple of weeks ago.” He laughed softly, “you said you were dreading cooking dinner so I thought I’d help out a bit.”

“That was you…” You asked with a breath, feeling your heart starting to thud heavily in your chest.

“Well yeah.” He smiled brightly, “who else would it be?”

“Tell me something… how many times have you sent stuff to my apartment?”

“Food? At least once a week, I mean, you can’t forget to eat, it’s important.”

“Sure is.”

“The other stuff? Depended.” He shrugged, “I figured it’s Christmas so you should get treated a little more than usual, flowers, treats. I went through your Amazon list,” he nodded toward the tree, “though I’m figuring some of that’s still under there.”

“Okay, but why?”

“Because you deserve it.” He stepped toward you and you fought every instinct in your brain to step back, not wanting to get a negative response out of him, “you’re so beautiful, so kind and sweet. I mean, it didn’t take much to fall in love with you.”

“Oh Thomas I—”

“Was I too secretive with my Santa game?” He laughed, “did you not realize they were all from me?”

“No.. no I did not.”

“Well, surprise.” He replied with a sheepish grin, “I was your secret admirer.”

“I didn’t even realize I had one.” You replied with an awkward laugh, praying that he would stay the two feet away from you he currently was.

“What’d you mean?” He asked, his face falling, “who did you think they were from?”

“Well, to be completely honest, Liz.”

“Ms. Donnelly?” His face scrunched, “why would any of them be from her?”

“Because I am her girlfriend.” Liz’s voice growled through the apartment and you jumped, having not realized the door had never been shut behind Thomas. You had no idea how long she had been standing there or how much she had heard but one thing was clear; she was absolutely livid. “What the hell do you think you’re doing here?”

“It’s practically Christmas.” He gestured around, “I thought that was the best time to make romantic declarations.”

“Is that so?” Liz asked, her brow raising before whatever was in her hands found home on the entry way table and a dark gleam took over her eyes. “How about I tell you what the best thing to do is right now?” She stepped towards him and he visibly gulped, “you’re going to get the hell out of here and you’re never going to set foot on this block ever again. If I so much as catch a glimpse of you attempting to nose your way into her life, I’ll sick Stabler on you, understood?”

“Yes Ms. Donnelly.” He nodded, shrinking around himself as he ducked his gaze, attempting to step around her to get over to the door.

“And I think it’s very clear you don’t need to show up at work after the holidays, you’re fired. Don’t expect any good references either.”

She followed him toward the door, making sure he was scurrying his way to the stairs before she swung it shut behind him, flicking the lock for extra security. Her eyes closed for a moment and she took a deep breath before turning to you, noticing the way you were clutching the counter so tight your knuckles were white.

“Are you alright?” She asked, her voice impeccably soft as she cautiously stepped toward you, a hand soothing its way up your arm and you looked up at her, a slight shake in your voice.

“Kinda feel like I’m gonna be sick.” You ran your hand over your face, letting out a low breath, “god I was so stupid, how could I not realize?” You leant back into the counter, “I really did think it was you sending me everything.”

“Everything?” Her brow raised as her arm wound around your waist, pulling you to her so she could leave a soft kiss on your temple. “It wasn’t just the flowers?”

You shook your head, rolling your eyes at the lavish bouquet that you wanted nothing more than to toss in the garbage, “he’s been sending me things for months, and I don’t even know what was him and what was you.”

“Has he been following you?” She asked, worry taking over her voice.

“I dunno.” You shrugged, “we split a cab after drinks one night, dropped me off first but who knows, that was probably part of the plan.”

“I thought I was going overboard mentioning Stabler but now I’m starting to think it may be a good idea.” Her eyes swept through your apartment, taking in all the new trinkets that hadn’t been there the last time she was, “I’m going to get him to run Thomas’ name, do a more thorough background check, and let’s get you out of here, you’re staying at my place until New Years.”

“Are you sure?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” She squeezed at your hand.

“You’re not…  mad anymore?” You asked and her face fell before she let out a weary sigh, shaking her head.

“Absolutely not. I was over worked and stressed and came to a very wrong conclusion when I should have seen how suspicious that was from a different angle.”

“You know I’d never cheat on you, right?” You couldn’t help the tears swimming into your eyes, both at the question and the fact that you were pretty shaken up considering your evening.

“Oh sweetheart.” Liz stepped forward again, her hands cupping your cheeks as she leant in to kiss you, her lips brushing against yours while she spoke, “of course I do. I know how much you love me and I love you even more than you could imagine. I’m so sorry I said those terrible things. You’re the greatest partner I could ask for, always so understanding when I have to shuffle things around, I should be praising the ground you walk on.”

“Okay well now you’re going overboard.” You let out a watery laugh, smiling as you leant forward to kiss her again.

“Nonsense.” She kissed the tip of your nose, “my girl deserves the absolute best.”

“The absolute best would be getting the fuck out of here; I feel like I need to burn half my belongings.” You shuddered and she squeezed at your shoulders, directing you toward the door.

“Grab what you need. We can come back in a couple of days to sort through everything and figure out what came from that creep and what I had sent over.”

“Okay.” You slipped into your coat, grabbing your bag grabbing Liz quickly before she ushered you out the door “thank you. I love you.”

“I love you more sweetheart.”

You’d fully calmed down a couple of hours later, curled up in Liz’s arms on her couch at her very comfortable and very private brownstone. A warm glow casted from the fully decorated tree in the corner, the main source of light in the room as Christmas movies played on the television and fluffy snowflakes drifted through the air outside. You let out a soft sigh, burrowing further into her embrace and in return her arm squeezed at you, her lips brushing against your hairline as the curved up into a smile. You both knew that no matter what the world threw at you, you had each other, you were safe and loved and there was no one else you’d rather spend the holidays or your lives with.

__________________

@svulife-rl @mickey-gomez @yesterdaysgone @momlifebehard @alexusonfire @alexxavicry @rainbowelshrhian @daddy-heather-dunbar @evilregal2002 @ladysc @dextur @disneyfan624 @kdaghay @svushots @onmykneesformarvel @kalixxh @kmc1989 @irishavengersassemble @louderfortheback @noahrex @temp0rary-bliss @wittygutsy @imlike-so-gaydude @gay-frogs08 @baubeautyandthegeek

[imzadi-caskett-huddy]

CHARACTER ASK GAME: Kate Beckett, 1-14 (all) + 25., if it's not a problem. :) Thank you!

I'm not gonna lie, I 100% wanted someone to send me this ask about Beckett! Sorry it took a little bit to answer, I'm on vacation so I've been occupied. But here we go!

1. I like this character because she's not perfect. She has flaws, but she still always tries to do the right thing. She's badass. She's strong. She's independent. She's incredibly well written because real people aren't perfect. There are qualities she has that I share. There are qualities she has that I admire and strive to emulate. And... not gonna lie...Stana's portrayal I'm sure has something to do with it as well.

2. Fav canon thing... um...I love that she was a fan of Castle's before they began working together. I also love that she was the youngest woman in the history of the NYPD to make detective. I also love her motorcycle though we never really saw her ride.

3. Least fav canon thing... that she felt she had to try to be separated from Castle in Season 8 to protect him... also she's not great at communication in relationships, like with Castle. Use your words!

4. Any other media... not gonna lie, I would LOVE a SVU/Castle crossover where Beckett and Benson shared time together, either with Benson as her captain, or as the two captains dealing with the men in their lives or their precincts.

5. First song that comes to mind...Superman by 3 Doors Down

6. Something Beckett and I have in common... we both suck at talking about our feelings.

7. Something the fandom does that I like... use her hairstyle to tell the season and sometimes the episode... does that count? This one was hard, lol

8. Something the fandom does that I despise... say her eyes are green in fics. Also there is a fair amount of Beckett hate inside the Castle fandom...I don't understand it.

9. Beckett and I would probably be okay roommates. I keep to myself the way she does. I'm slightly more messy I think than she'd probably like, but we'd most likely get along ok.

10. I could totally be best friends with Kate Beckett! Similar personalities... similar likes...we'd get along great.

11. Um...no. If I'm dating anyone from the world of Castle, it's Castle himself.

12. Headcanon I have...She made her Detective rank in vice. I'm reasonably sure this was never stated in the show, but it's just a strong feeling I have. She's too good at certain aspects of her job to not have come up through the ranks in vice before she became a homicide detective. Also that she was a chronic dater before Castle came along.

13. Emoji... nothing reminds me of her, but if I had to pick one she probably uses a lot, it would be the facepalm because... well... she did marry Castle. And I feel he requires that one a lot.

14. Fashion aesthetic... leather jackets

15. Favorite ship... uh, Caskett, duh!

16. Least fav ship...Josh. Definitely Josh. He was a serious problem who hung around way too long. And I KNOW Marlowe kept him around solely as the reason Castle and Beckett didn't hook up at the end of season 3 in episodes like LA

17. Ship that I don't hate but am fine with...um, there isn't one. She's Castle's girl. I don't like her with anyone else... I'm not fine with her with anyone else.

18. Canon relationship I admire with another character...I love her relationship with Martha. I also love her relationship with Espo, especially in episodes like Kill Shot. And I LOVE Lanie and Kate screentime!

19. Relationship from Canon that I don't like... I don't know that there is one outside of the guys she dated. Not a fan of her dealings with Sorenson, Demming or Josh, but I feel that's pretty standard.

20. Ideal best friend... Lanie is a pretty great girl best friend. Castle is a pretty great guy best friend... which is good considering they got married.

21. Fav thing to do when writing for Beckett is angst. I can't help it...Stana was SO great with those heavy emotional scenes on the show, I love worrying then with her in my head! Something I don't like writing for her is actual police work. I HATE it so much. Also, the few times I've had to write her with Josh drive me crazy too.

22. Something I like in fics when it comes to Beckett is having her call Castle "Rick" sparingly. He calls her Kate way more than she calls him Rick... it should start like that in fics. Something I don't like... and I touched on it earlier... is when writers say she has green eyes. Her eyes are not green. Also, when writers have her just stay crying over everything... Kate is not a random emotional crier. You have to do a lot to get her to re m that point... she's not going to cry over an argument or something small.

23. Fav pic... oh no. No way can I narrow this down.

24. I'm not sure there is another character from another fandom that reminds me of Beckett. She's pretty one of a kind. She's definitely one of the best written characters in TV history, and she towers over everyone else in my list of favorite characters because she's so unique.

25. My first impression of this character was that she has great hair, awesome leather jackets that I want, and that she's a badass hero who at times I see a lot of myself in. Also that she's a fighter. Now after watching the show beginning to end, my impression was pretty spot on. Though I would add I discovered her softer side (I initially saw the show before they got together, so before the Kate side of her personality was really fleshed out). And she's stronger than I initially realized.

These were fun, thanks for asking!

[oneshotnewbie]

A small blurb about Amanda and Olivia where she is afraid because you got hurt and Amanda tells her that Olivia is in love with you because of how she reacts? A really smal blurb if you want, I know writer block sucks hard but maybe it can help you get back on track if you try yourself out on something small?

---

"Sometimes it scares me." Olivia said to herself, looking down at her bloody hands that rested nervously on her knees. Her whole body trembled with worry and tears welled up in her eyes as she tried to scrape your blood from underneath her fingernails- she couldn´t bear the sight of it.

Time passed between her and reality. What had happened hours ago seemed like a few seconds in which your petite body fell to the ground, your otherwise white turtleneck sweater turned red quickly and she sank down with her knees on the blood soaked earth next to you.

She held onto you like you were the only lifeline she had left. Full of adrenaline, she pulled your lifeless upper body into her arms and tried to shake you awake harshly, but none of that worked; your eyes stayed closed.

Olivia felt as if the pictures of this accident turned into a vicious insect that ate through her eyes and stabbed her brain with it´s venom. The toxin seemed to paralyze her physically in that chair but was pushing her mentally too the brink as an unspeakable nausea broke out in her and she had to swallow thickly.

The brunette shattered under the weight of the unknown of your well-being and was crushed by the shadow of panicky fear that hung over her. Her concern grew by the hour as various doctors ran past her but no one came to give her the information she so desperately needed.

"What do you mean by that?" Amanda asked in a soft voice to try to calm down her best friend. It hurt her heart to see the usually strong Olivia Benson like this; so full of fear, concern and worry.

"What I would be willing to do for her." She leaned forward as if she had a stomach cramp, when in truth it was just an unconscious reaction from her body that was too weak to get up but too restless to remain seated. "It´s terrifying." she spoke, as she finally found her voice again, even if there was nothing confident or hopeful in it anymore.

She knew that she would never be able to forgive herself if you died like this. An actually simple undercover mission that had gone terribly wrong and she was the one who made unnecessary mistakes and didn´t offer enough protection for you.

"That´s love, Liv."

The captain of what was possibly the strongest unit in the NYPD, exhaled heavily as the words of the blonde burned into her brain, the vein on her temple throbbing at the same time as her jaw clenched. Amanda was right and she hadn´t been able to accept it until this point.

Olivia was relieved and silently thanked her for helping, even as she deeply blamed herself for being so weak and helpless at the moment. She just wasn´t able to deal with the fear of losing the possible love of her life. She was unbeatable when it came to work-related matters, but when it came to people important to her, she usually didn´t know how to deal with unforeseen events.

Too much had already happened in her life for that.