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ssixa · 4 years ago

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Feel Special //Narachan x OC (BW)

Description: Nala realizes that nice guys can make more than just great friends.

Genre: fluff, SMUT!!!

Pairing: Narachan (from M.O.N.T) x OC (BW)

Word count: 5.4k

Content warning: switch, mommy kink, daddy kink, profanity, language

A/N: shit I wish I did this art, but I found this black girl pic on the internet and I just had to use it! it’s absolutely beautiful. So full on S/O to the Pinterest profile Jess Create. Idk this person, but the artwork is just absolutely too beautiful not to share<3. This was technically my first time writing smut and I suck at it, so...sorry.

*All pic collages are made by me unless I state otherwise. Individual pictures in the collage are not mine and I give credit to where credit is due.

Nala found herself in one of those unique circumstances where she ended up living with 2 other men. The only difference was that she knew one of them by the name of Bitsaeon since childhood. While growing up she made another friend by the name of Roda and it didn’t take long for all of them to get close and be each others closest friend. At some time during high school, Roda ended up moving away and it wasn’t until later in their 20s that Roda decided to move back, but instead it would be better and financially easier if all three of them lived together. That’s how Nala came to live with these two men who conveniently were her already good friends.

Nothing honestly became awkward between them. They survived each others hook up moments they had in the apartment (both the warned and not warned moments). Others around them knew that they were close and wondered if Nala ever had any feelings for either at any point in time and her answer was always no. She knew majority of the females, whereever they were, always tried flirting with the boys, but she always helped them out when they had no interest in doing anything with those girls by pretending to be in a relationship with them. That’s how close she was to these boys.

A new friend by the name of Narachan popped up around the time they all moved in together. He knew Roda and Bit from their work at the record label where the staff at the company gathered them to work on a project for the debut group under the company. During the project, they became close so when it eventually came to an end they kept in contact with each other. Eventually, Roda and Bit invited Narachan over to the apartment to be able to finally meet Nala in person and to hangout altogether. Nala was only ever acquainted with him through pictures and few brief exchanges over the phone. She was curious as to what kind of person he was.

The day Narachan finally came over, the two hit it off instantly. He was honestly just like Bit and Roda so it wasn’t hard trying to figure him out. They spent a whole evening together playing games, drinking, and just vibing. Nara spent the night on the couch since he had a little too much to drink and wouldn’t be able to drive back to his place. She gathered blankets and a pillow for him and wished him a goodnight. The next morning she woke up early (since for some reason she wakes up earlier after a night of drinking) and decided to grab hangover food for everyone. The smell of food eventually woke everyone up and they all enjoyed a nice breakfast. Nara evetually left after she convinced him to not worry about paying her back for the food.

“So~” Bit speaks up while they (they as in Roda, Bit, and Nala) were having a lazy Saturday evening.

“So what?” Nala replied as she was taking down her hair that was long overdue. She always had a love hate relationship with her hair since it tended to be the 4c type. Her hair looked beautifully filled out when the cornrows are taken out, but once water touched it the shrinkage is real.

“Narachan, y’all seem to have hit it off a lot better than Roda and I predicted” he replied.

“Honestly he’s adorable. He seriously reminds me of you two idiots so it’s probably why we got along so well” She answers focused a section of a row that refused to come out.

“oooohhhh does our Nala have a crush on our new friend?” Roda speaks up mockingly

“Oh shut up and no, he’s just chill and there for the vibe so I appreciate it” She replies smacking him on the shoulder. The room filled with laughter and the evening continued on as everyone did absolutely nothing worthwhile.

Months passed by and eveyone were just as close as ever. One particular day, Nala had a date with a guy she had been talking to online and was beyond excited. Roda and Bit knew about her date and in order for them not to die of boredom without her, they planned a boys night out with Narachan. While getting ready in her room, she could hear Narachan walk in the front door, he really just wasn’t a very quiet human being. She felt proud of her outfit for the night. It was a cute, body shaping, off the shoulder black dress and black heels with a little silver jewelry to match. Her makeup was simple as well since she wasn’t one to wear a lot in the first place. Her date and her were going to an art gallery event since they both shared a love for those types of artistic events.

After giving herself a look over, Nala grabs her purse and leaves her room. She walks into the kitchen to grab a glass of water before heading out.

“WOOOWWWW” Nala hears Roda exclaim followed by a whistle

“Oh shut up” she rolls her eyes in response

“But honestly, does it look like too much? I mean we are going to an art show at a gallery” she start giving herself a once over having second thoughts.

“You look amazing” she hears Nara speak up. She looks up and sees him quickly avoid eye contact with her. Odd.

“Thanks boo” she replies back like she always does. Nala was one of those nickname girls who calls everyone boo, dude, or bruh so this didn’t phase anyone...well that’s what she assumed at least. She gave herself a once over when she gets a message from her date saying that he was outside. She tells the boys to have a fun night and not be too reckless without her around. They wished her a good night and she left the house ready for an amazing night.

That date was absolutely terrible. The whole night was a mess and it was because of him messing up left to right. They got to the event and turns out he bought faulty tickets for the event on some sketchy website so he pretty much got scammed. Nala let that pass since the night was still young so she decided they should go in anyways. She ended up paying for her own ticket which she found quite irritating because she really was only planning to spend very little if nothing at all tonight. They get into the event which was absolutely amazing. The ambiance of the whole place was set nicely and matched very well with the different art pieces posted around the small building. They had little snacks and drinks to offer guests since they came with the ticket purchase so she ate only a little expecting them to go to dinner like he had planned.

During the whole event though, he drank and ate to his hearts content and when she reminded me him about dinner after he said this was it. That had her fuming because the last thing he can do to piss her off is mess with the relationship between food and her. He walked around flirting with other women at the event and fully neglected the art that they came here for. Even when they walked around, he stayed on his phone and only looked up to say “that’s cool” or “I don’t get it”. At least she could understand now that he lied about being an arts lover. They left the event and at that point she was ready to go home. He tried making a move on her which is what she realized was his whole motive for the night. He wasn’t too pleased at her rejecting him and called her a bitch and a dumb slut. So she called herself an uber and blocked his number.

Honestly, they had talked for a few weeks so Nala thought it would work out, but she guessed it wasn’t in the stars. This always happened though. She could never find herself a decent guy because they either become a friend or end up being an asshole. You may ask “why not date the friend that’s decent then?” well it’s because once they hit it off, she finds it hard to see them any other way. Nala can acknowledge that they’re attractive, but that’s it. Another failed date for the books, hopefully the boys bought some alcohol so she could drown her sorrows.

Nala unlocks the front door to the apartment and kicks off her shoes once inside. She throws her stuff on the kitchen table and heads for the fridge. She opens it grateful there’s a new case of ales stocked and ready to be consumed. She cracks open the bottle and chugs half of it down.

“Um, Nala, you good?” She heard Narachan speak up from the darkness of the living room. This nearly causes her to choke not having realized he was there. She spends a few minutes coughing her lungs out before trying to say anything.

“Oh my god I’m sorry, did I scare you?!” he exclaims standing up from the sofa

“I’m fine, and yes you literally just scared the shit out of me” she laughs after finally coming down.

“Oh sorry” he says scratching the back of his neck

“You’re fine and to answer the first question before I just almost died, no I’m not good. Tonight was terrible” she sighs grabbing herself another drink from the fridge and heading to the sofa.

“You wanna talk about it” he asks sitting down beside her. She agreed and began telling him all that happened. Thoughtlessly laying her head on his shoulder and linking her arms around his. This tended to be her comfort mechanism whenever she vented her feelings. Bit and Roda were used to it by now, but very comforting to her as she poured out her feelings to them. So it didn’t seem weird to her to do it with Nara since she now considered him one of her good friends. They sat there in the darkness staring at the blank tv at the front of the room.

“I swear is it that guys think I’m ugly or take me as a joke? I seriously don’t know what’s wrong with me”

“Nala you’re an absolutely amazing person. I do admit that your taste in men is pretty bad though” he replies with a laugh.

“Yeah I guess it is” she replies back with a sad laugh.

“If you don’t mind me asking, but Roda and Bit are actually amazing guys. Why is it you’ve never thought of a relationship with one of them” he comments

“Lol you wouldn’t be the first to ask that. I do admit that they’re amazing and not actually ugly. It just happens that guys that are amazing I end up becoming friends with them. There ends up being no feelings to them and I don’t know why that is, but it is” she states with an acknowledging sigh.

“So you can’t date decent guys because you end up becoming good friends with them?” he repeats back

“Pretty much” she sighs for the nth time tonight.

“So I guess there’s no hope for me huh?” he adds with a slight laugh. It took a moment for his words to register in her brain.

“Wait...Nara, what d-did you just say” she stutters out

“Honestly, I’ve liked you ever since I first came to your place” he replies

“Nara that was months ago. Why didn’t you tell me?” she replies back still in shock

“I know and it would’ve been weird since we had just met. You are an absolutely amazing person and I didn’t want to ruin our friendship that had barely just started”

“I- Nara”

“It’s ok that you don’t feel the same way, I just thought you should know. I hope this doesn’t affect our friendship” he says finally looking down at her. She finally turns her head to look up from his shoulder. He just has a soft smile on his face. Nala doesn’t know what came over her, but she leaned in and kissed him. She could feel him freeze for a second, but finally lean into it. It was a soft and innocent kiss. They separated after what felt like forever.

“Nala, y-you don’t have to force yourself to like me back I promise I’ll be fine” he says still in shock

“You idiot, I’ve liked you for a little while now” she comments back laughing

“W-what did you...”

“I haven’t like you as long as you’ve liked me, but I think I realized my feelings not that long ago. I think you have been one of my first friends I’ve actually fell for” she replies back shyly looking away. They sat in silence over the confessions that have just been admitted. Next thing she realizes is a hand grabbing her chin up and lips back on hers. The kiss was intense and saw no end. Nara slowly laid her down on the sofa without the kiss having any sort of break. She wrapped her arms around his neck trying to bring him closer to her. The kiss, which really turned out to be a make out session finally reached it’s breaking point and they both needed to catch their breaths.

They starred into each others eyes catching their breath,

“Nala, please let me show you how amazing and worth it you really are” he says with almost pleading eyes

“O-okay” she reply back. He leaned back down connecting their lips once again in another heated kiss. Shs could feel his hands roaming her frame which only sent shivers down her spine and having her get butterflies in her stomach. His lips made his way to her chin then down to her neck and shoulder. The feeling of his lips were light and yet deadly like an addictive poison. Sbs felt him nip at her shoulder which caused slight pain to turn into immense pleasure.

Nala felt his hands that were still left roaming go towards the back of her thighs. Before she knew it, he had picked her up to straddle him. He proceeded to stand up and she instinctively wrapped her legs around him. She paid no mind to what was happening because she could tell they were walking towards her room. He opened the door and once inside kicked it closed with his foot. He carried her to her bed where he laid her down and hovered not ceasing to leave leave alone for even a second. After what felt like another eternity, she felt him fully disappear. She let out a moan from the sudden lack of him and opened her eyes to see what was happening.

“Now sweetheart, can you take off that pretty little black dress for me” he said with a dark lusd filled voice. She starred at him completely amazed by the man who looks like Nara, but doesn’t sound like the one she know.

“Don’t make me ask you twice” he said slightly threateningly. She pulled her dress off over her head as fast as she could. She realized that apart from her lace underwear the only other thing she had on was the pasties covering her nipples so they wouldn’t poke out through the dress. At this realization, she covered herself up, but also realized that his dark gaze added an extra shiver up her spine.

“Nala, you’re beautiful. Don’t hide yourself from me” he says as he reaches out to put her arms by her side.

“C-can you at least take your shirt off...” she asks softly.

“Not yet. First I’m going to make you feel good” Nara utters with a smirk. He kneels and centers himself between her legs making himself at eye level to her. He goes in for another intense kiss to her lips. He pushes her down slowly onto the bed while he leads the trail of kisses down her neck then to the center of her chest. He reaches up and carefully removes the pasties from her right nipple. He then reaches towards her left nipple and removes the other pasty from there.

He start rolling the right nipple with his fingers and attacks the left one with his mouth. The sucking, tugging, and small licks he delivered out her in a state of near ecstasy. She felt the heat between her legs growing the more it was left neglected. She wanted him, needed him.

“P-please Nara, I need you” she begged. He released his right hand and glided it down her stomach to her inner thigh. She was going crazy, she craved the touch that was so close yet time made it seem so far away. Nara, slowly glided his fingers up to her heat and on to her sensitive nub. He didn’t do anything, but place his finger on her nub but that little gesture had her floating.

“F-fuck please, do something Nara” she begged

“Baby you’re so needy. Trust me this will all be worth it” he says softly. As she was about to respond he shoved one finger into her heat with no chance of warning

“F-FUCK FUCK OH MY G—OHHHH” she blurted out. He started moving his fingers in and out as he continued sucking on her now very sensitive nipple.

“A-another p-please” she begged. The one wasn’t giving her the feeling she wanted only the bare build up. He adds in a second finger and pumps faster. He curves his fingers which ended up hitting the spot that would send sparks flying.

“Found it” he whispers seducingly when he heard her let out a big moan. His pumps were constant, but fast and he could tell she was close to her release with her heat being like a vacuum to his fingers and removing them became increasingly difficult. To really push her over the edge, he placed his thumb on her clit and started circling motions causing more arousal than she even knew she could get.

“F-fuck N-Nara I’m so fucking close fuck” she squeaks out. He went faster and faster and her climax hit,

“F-FUCK DADDY” she exclaims as she pushes her orgasm with the help of his fingers. She started seeing sparks and felt like this could have only been a dream.

“So...daddy. I love the sound of that coming from your lips” he leans down to whisper in her ear once he finishes her

“I-I...” she had no words to say. She always knew this was one of her kinks, but never had she imagined calling this sweet “innocent” man daddy.

“So what do you want daddy to do for you princess?” He says in a deeper tone

“I need you Nara” she says softly with eyes looking in all directions but his

“That isn’t my name now is it” he glares

“Please d-daddy, I need you” she begged once again

“Now that’s my good girl” he replies. He stands up ripping off his shirt in a way that was a lot more sexy than needed. She never realized how fit Nara actually was and she could’ve honestly never guessed either. He continues on removing his pants leg by leg as their eye contact never broke from his. He tossed his pants to the side and grabbed the rim to his maroon boxer-briefs. All she could do was swallow at what would be occurring in just a few moments.

Nara agonizingly slow removed the clothing finally letting his hard member spring free. He wasn’t big, but he definitely wasn’t small either; he was just right. She could feel drool pool up and risk escaping her mouth. She just wanted to wrap her mouth around his member and suck him dry, but as soon as she sat up making her way towards himl, he stops her.

“Baby girl, what do you think you’re doing” he asks with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

“I-I just want to make daddy feel good” she replied without breaking eye contact with his hard member.

“As much as I appreciate the thought, I already told you I would make you realize how amazing you are” he says softly pushing her back on the bed.

“B-but I-”

“No. Now answer me. Are you on birth control?” he asks in a demanding tone

“Y-yes” she replies softly. She still wasn’t used to this side of Narachan.

“Good” is all he replies. He bends and spreads her legs and then pulls her bent legs forward to shift her whole body to the edge of the bed.

“You ready?” He asks almost as to make sure this is what she actually wants.

“Na- daddy, please” she looks at him with pleading eyes. At the very end of her statement he leans forward slowing filling up her hungry and deprived core. He pauses for a minute giving her time to adjust and once she said she was fine and he could move, he pulled out part way and pushed back in slowly.

His few slow strokes had her feeling like you were on cloud nine, but after a little while she hated to say it but she needed more.

“D-daddy please faster” she pleaded. On command, he started moving faster snapping his hips like he had been waiting for those words his whole life. He just as quickly got over this one position. He pulled out and she let out a sigh at the sudden emptiness.

“Hands and knees, now” he commands. Nala flips quick needing to be filled once more. She was expecting him to be gentle in the beginning until she told him it was ok to go faster, but she was wrong. Nara thrusted his hard member without warning cause her to let out a moan that she knew her poor neighbors would be able to hear. He was in pulling and pushing in and out at a constant yet fast speed.

Nala could feel her stomach tension build up and she knew she wouldn’t be able to last very much longer.

“I’m so close” she whaled out not caring who could hear her. Her moans became increasingly louder which encouraged Nara to go faster and deeper and one particular thrust hit her spot at just the right angle. She let out the biggest moan she had ever heard herself let out. He knew what he had done and made it a point to hit the exact spot back to back. He added the circling of her clit giving her an extra push to her splendid end.

She never realized sex could feel this amazing. Her past hookups were good for the moment but easily forgettable. With Nara, she doesn’t think she’ll ever be able to forget this. She always said that “having a big dick doesn’t always mean men always know how to use it” (a/n: I’ve heard this so many times so I can’t really give credit to a specific person...so credit to social media lol). As her moans persisted, he never let up until the very end. The tension finally peaked and she was hit with her climax.

Nara kept thrusting and circling her clit helping her ride out her high for a little while longer. Nala’s limbs gave out and she couldn’t bare her own weight anymore. She fell on her side trying to catch her breath and stopping the convulsions running through her body almost like they were trying to milk out as much of her climax as possible. Nara makes his way to the side of the bed, picking her up and moving her up the the head of the bed and covering her with the bed sheets.

“W-wait Nara...you didn’t cum did you?” She asks as she sits up slowly.

“It’s ok, this was for you...all for you” he finishes with a soft shy voice. He for the nth time threw her off tonight. Maybe this guy is bipolar because this wasn’t the same boy that was just ramming his cock into her only a moment ago.

“No. It’s not ok.” Nala deadpans

“Sit.” She commands. Out of nowhere, Nara found himself obeying and sitting on the bed. She climbs out of the bed with whatever new found strength she got out of nowhere and made her way between his legs. Her lips became at level with his still painfully erected member that was slightly oozing with precum.

“So you’re saying that you were going to deal with this yourself? Nara, you made me feel special, more than a lot of people who have been in my life so let me do the same for you” she says without hesitation, but a lot of confidence.

“But, Nala” he tried to interject

“That wasn’t a statement open for an opinion” she cuts him off before he could finish his statement.

“Now, tell me what I can do for you baby” she cooed lightly kissing his tip. He let out a small moan to only try and repress the others that would follow. She slapped her hands on his thighs using them as a way to propel herself towards him. Her lips slightly grazing his ear,

“No holding back. I want to hear you” she says with an evil whisper while placing her hand on his member and stroking it dreadfully slow. She pulls back to make eye contact with the now frazzled man who tries his best to keep as much composure as possible. That failed. He let out a small string of grunts and moans that he gave up trying to suppress. So with a smile, Nala commands,

“So tell me what you want mommy to do”

“P-please suck me off...m-mommy” he says with a breathless tone.

“Anything for my baby” she replies with a smirk. She gets back on her knees and licks a strip from base to tip. She then wraps her lips around his member and begins to bob her head, hallowing her cheeks out. Nara continues on with his moans and grunts.

“Mommy please faster...deeper” he says barely able to get his words out. Nala did as requested making him moan out “yeses” and “fucks”. Just like Nala, Nara felt the tension of his climax building up.

“Fuck I’m so close...mommy....please...inside you” was all he was able to muster out. She releases his member with a pop that echoed through the room. She stands a little ways in front of him,

“So what position baby do you want me” she says with a lustful gaze. His boldness takes over as he grabs her arm and bends her over the edge of the bed. He pushes his member in and starts thrusting a a decently quick pace. The room is filled with slaps of skin to skin and strings of moans and profanity.

Nara brought Nala’s body up to a standing position with his member still deep in her, but the skin on her back molding with his chest. He continued with his last few thrusts before meeting his ultimate bliss. He thrusted a few more times to let out whatever seed he felt like he left in him. He pulled out causing Nala to feel emptiness once again while she laid back in the bed and he goes to the bathroom to grab a towel.

He comes back and cleans both of them up and tosses the used towel into the laundry basket. He gets back into bed and pulls her in so they’re chest to chest.

“Hey Nala” he speaks up

“Mhmm” was all she was able to get out.

“You know I like you right?” He asks

“Dumbass...I really like you too” she replies back with a light hit to his chest. He laughs as he pulls her in for a closer hug. Not too long later, they both were fast asleep in each other’s arms.

The next morning, the sun beamed through the window of Nala’s bedroom. Nara was the first to open his eyes and he couldn’t be more at peace looking at Nala’s sleeping form. He couldn’t believe that the girl he’s pretty much been in love with for the past months is finally in his arms. He must’ve not realized he zoned out because when he finally snapped back to reality, Nala was staring back at him with her beautiful brown eyes.

“G-good morning” he stutters out

“Good morning” Nala replies in a sleepy voice

“So...breakfast?” He quirks up

“Pancakes sound amazing right now ” Nala laughs

“Definitely, let me go make some” Nara snaps up as he begins to get out of bed. Nala suddenly reaches out for his arm,

“What’s wrong?” Nara looks back kind of concerned

“Nara, let’s make them together...for a commemoration...” she shyly speaks up.

“Commemoration for what?” He laughs

“Our first day” she says with a warm smile. This reply startles Nara because he realized that he never actually asked Nala out.

“I’m a dumbass, I don’t normally hook up with someone I like before hooking up with them” he hangs his head in embarrassment.

“It’s ok, honestly. Last night was really great” Nala replies lovingly

“It was, wasn’t it” Nara smiles to himself

“But you know what’s even better?”

“What?” Nara questions with a laugh of confusion

“PANCAKES!” Nala replies as she jumps out of the bed and runs to the door. Nara catches her as soon as they reach the kitchen and holds her in his embrace. Nala turns around and reaches up on her tippy toes to give him a quick peck.

“EEEHHHEEEMMMM” a voice comes out of nowhere. Nara and Nala both snap their heads to the mysterious voice and grow a look of embarrassment when they see Bit and Roda sitting in the living room watching tv

“How are you guys like this this early in the morning?” Roda speaks up with a grossed out face

“Ummmm” Nala speaks up

“Ah nevermind, I don’t wanna know. I’m just glad y’all are finally together, Roda you owe me 20 bucks” Bit laughs sticking out his hand. Roda reaches for his wallet and retrieves the 20 to give to Bit.

“What the hell kind of bet did you guys even place?” Nala aks getting increasingly angry.

“Oh just that lover boy over there would confess to you before the end of the month. I was getting nervous that I would lose, but thanks Nara” Bit laughs waving the 20 in the air. Nara’s face got red not realizing that his feelings for you were that obvious to eveyone but you.

“Y’all are assholes” Nala tried to rush them, but stops herself to turn around.

“Wait...Nara...were you in on this?!” She says looking a little heart broken. Nara starts to realize what she means,

“Nala I promise I knew nothing about this. If I did...that wouldn’t make much sense now would it” he replied hastily with his hands up and back.

“Don’t worry Nala, Nara knows nothing of this” Roda replies back with a nonchalant smile.

“Fine, I would’ve ended all of you if it was true” she say with clenched teeth. Nara comes behind her giving her another back hug and she visibly melts into his touch.

“Wait...where were y’all last night. I got home from the freak show of a date and Nara was chilling on the couch by himself”

“Oh we had a last minute edit to make for one of the album tracks we’re making for that new debut group. We were trying to finish up quickly, but when we did...let’s just say we heard and saw more than we wanted to” Roda replies with a shiver.

“Oh my g- wait, don’t tell me y’all stayed in the house the whole night” Nala says in a panic.

“Why the fuck would we want to stay and listen to all of that. As soon as y’all went to the bedroom we dipped and went to the bar with Beomhan” Roda spoke up.

“Wait isn’t he the kid in the debut group you’re working with? Isn’t it risky for him to be out like that?” Nala speaks up and Nara nods in agreement behind her,

“He was bored so what the company doesn’t know won’t kill them” Bit laughs.

“Oh whatever, y’alls career funerals” Nara speaks up laughingly.

“Oh shut up lover boy. On a different note I hear we’re having pancakes” Roda smiles.

#kpop smut #kpop fluff #underrated kpop #m.o.n.t #narachan #roda #bitsaeon #m.o.n.t arena #beomhan #non idol au

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pastelbatfandoms · 4 years ago

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ABCs of your OCs

A list of oc questions in alphabetical categories - i made each category based on the first word I could think of in alphabetical order, so enjoy!

Decided to try and answer these using Gifs and Images of My characters (aka who or what reminds me of My character)

.Doing this for My OC Michelle Riley in My Riverdale Fic.

Michelle is “played by” Ksenia Solo (Teen) & Kaya Scodelario (Young Adult)

A: Aptitude 1. what are your oc’s natural abilities, things they’ve been doing since young? Writing,solving Mysteries,has always had an interest in the occult and anything different and unusual.

2. what activities have they participated in? Michelle is a bit of a Loner but she has done Cheer and writes Poetry in her spare time as well as mysteries. She also was a camp counselor & Lifeguard with Betty and Cheryl over the summer.

3. what abilities do they have? She’s human but Michelle knows a bit of Karate and was taught how to fight by FP.

4. what things are they bad at? Being Honest,Indecisive,

5. what is their most impressive talent? Writing and Dancing

B: Basics 1. what is their hair color? Dark brown. Dies Black or wears Blond wigs.

2. what is their eye color? Brown but wears Light green or blue contacts

3. how tall are they? A little shorter than Jughead

4. how old are they? 15 (Story start) 19 (Story end) October 7 2000

5. how much do they weigh?

C: Comfort 1. how do they sit in a chair? Usually leaning forward.

2. in what position do they sleep?

3. what is their ideal comfort day? Reading or watching TV,eating,doing something creative,learning new things (especially about the occult or conspiracy theories),writing poetry,mainly being by herself on her down time.Although she’s an ambivert so she does like hanging out with her BF or Friends after her alone time.

4. what is their major comfort food? um Anything lol She’s literally a female Jughead in more ways than one. Burgers and fries,Milkshakes,Pancakes,Chips and salsa...

5. who is the best at comforting them when down? Betty or Mom. Most of the time Jughead. (unless it’s about him)

D: Decoration 1. how would they decorate a house if they had one under their name? Minimalistic with plants,charming and attractive yet simple and comfortable. Small neighborhood.

2. how would they decorate their child’s room? Michelle doesn’t want kids

3. how do they decorate their own room? Shabby Chic,Girly mixed with rustic. With of course darker undertones.

4. what type of clothes and accessories do they wear? Goth,Grunge,Edgy,had a preppy phase. (Casual Artsy in Middle school)

5. do they like makeup/nail/beauty trends? Yes.

E: External Personality 1. does the way they do things portray their internal personality? Sometimes. She’s not as tough as she portrays.

2. do they do things that conform to the norm? Sometimes. If on her own.

3. do they follow trends or do their own thing? No

4. are they up-to-date on the internet fads? Only E-Girl and Mod Goth.

5. do they portray their personality intentionally or let people figure it out on their own? Is shy at first.

F: Fun 1. what do they do for fun? Shopping,Dancing,hanging out at Pop Tates Malt Shop,Drive in movies,Art,watching Horror movies,writing poetry,Solving Mysteries,going out to a club or the biker bar The White Wyrm.

2. what is their ideal party? See Above. Dancing,Strobe lights,Band,Underage Drinking/Sex. Unless she’s 18 or 19 then. Decorating for parties and liked having Clue inspired Sleepovers in middle school.

3. who would they have the most fun with? Her girls. B,V & C.

4. can they have fun while conforming to rules? When alone yes.

5. do they go out a lot? Yes.

G: Gorgeous 1. what is their most attractive external feature? Her eyes and smile.

2. what is the most attractive part of their personality?

3. what benefits come with being their friend?

4. what parts of them do they like and dislike?

5. what parts of others do they envy? IDK if I’m going to finish this.

H: Heat 1. do they rather a hot or cold room?

2. do they prefer summer or winter? Spring and Fall

3. do they like the snow? Not really.

4. do they have a favorite summer activity? Thrift Shopping and Sleuthing

5. do they have a favorite winter activity? Reading inside or Sleuthing.

I: In-the-closet

1. what is their sexuality? Pan Sexual

2. have they ever questioned their sexuality? yes

3. have they ever questioned their gender? No

4. would/was their family be okay with them being LGBT? Yes they are very open minded.

5. how long would/did it take for them to come out? High School

J: Joy 1. what makes them happy? Art,writing,shopping,mysteries,love,music.

2. who makes them happy? Her Family (Blood and none)

3. are there any songs that bring them joy? Wow I have a whole playlist...

4. are they happy often? More or less

5. what brings them the most joy in the world?

K: Kill 1. have they ever thought about suicide? I don’t write that. They may have dark thoughts but never act on them,this is not 13 reasons why.

2. have they ever thought about homicide? No

3. if they could kill anyone without punishment, would they? who? No

4. who would miss them if they died? Um all her Friends and Family

5. who would be happy they died, anyone? Penny Peabody lbr

L: Lemons 1. what is their favorite fruit? 2. what is their least favorite fruit?

3. are there any foods they hate?

4. do they have any food intolerances?

5. what is their favorite food? Already said. She also really likes Chicken with chips and salsa.

M: Maternal

1. would they want a daughter or a son?

2. how many children do they want?

3. would they be a good parent?

4. what would they name a son?

what would they name a daughter?

5. would they adopt? Possibly

N: Never Have I Ever

1. what would they never do? Kill Innocents.

2. what have they never done that they want to do?

3. is there anything they absolutely can’t believe people do? People do alot of shitty things. Killing Kids and animals would be one of them.

4. what is the most embarrassing thing they’ve done?

5. have they done anything they thought they’d never do? Um get drunk and sleep with her boyfriends Dad??...Or cheat on Jug with Veronica. SPOILERS! But I probably won’t finish this story lbh.

O: Optimism 1. are they optimistic or pessimistic? Both

2. are they openly optimistic?

3. are they good at giving advice? Yes

4. is there anyone in their life that throws optimism on them? Throws lol I suppose her Mom or Betty.

5. were they always optimistic?

>>>P: Personality 1. what is their best personality trait?

2. what is their worst personality trait?

3. what of their personality do others love?

4. what of their personality do others envy?

5. do they hate anything about their personality/about other’s personalities?

<<<Will do this later

Q: Questions 1. do they ask for help? Sometimes

2. do they ask questions in class? She did yes,when she was trying to be a straight A student.

3. do they answer questions that make them a little uncomfortable? Yes

4. do they ask weird questions? Yes

5. are they curious? Yes

R: Rules 1. do they follow rules? Sometimes.

2. would they be a strict or laid-back parent? A good balance.

3. have they ever been consequences for breaking a rule?

4. have they broken any rules they now regret breaking?

5. do they find any rules they/others follow absolutely ridiculous? Nope

S: Streets 1. are they street-smart? Yes

2. would they give money to someone on the streets? Probably

3. have they ever gotten in a fight on the streets? Yes

4. has anything happened to them on the streets? Other then Fights,no.

5. are they cautious when out? Now yes,but she can take care of herself.

T: Truth 1. are they honest? More so now yes.

2. can they tell if someone is lying? Yes

3. is it obvious when they’re lying? Yes

4. have they lied about anything they regret lying about? Sleeping with FP

5. have they ever been talked about behind their back? I’m sure.

U: Underdog 1. have they been bullied? A couple times but they stopped once she stood her ground,same with standing up for others (like Jughead)

2. have they bullied anyone? No

3. have they been physically attacked? Yes

4. have they ever been doubted? Yes.

5. have they surprised people with being good at something? Yes,alot of Guys (and girls) underestimate her.

V: Vomit 1. do they vomit often? 2. do they get lots of stomach aches? 3. are they good at comforting someone ill? 4. what do they like as far as comfort goes? 5. do they burp, cough, or hiccup most when nauseous? when vomiting?

W: Water 1. do they drink enough water? 2. have they learned to swim? 3. do they like to swim? 4. can they dive? 5. can they swim without holding their nose?

X: Xylophone 1. what is their favorite genre of music? Oldies,Indie & Goth Rock

2. do they have a favorite song? Prince-Die 4 U

3. do they have a favorite band/artist/singer? The Cure,Prince & The Neighborhood.

4. can they sing well? Sure

5. can they rap? No

Y: You 1. how old were you when you created them? It was in 2017.

2. what inspired you to create them? Watching Riverdale for the first time

3. were they different when they were first created? No

4. do you enjoy writing them more than other characters? No

5. what’s your favorite thing about them? Her style and sarcasm.

Z: Zebra 1. what’s their favorite animal? Cats and Dogs

2. do they like animals? Yes

3. cats or dogs? Both

4. what’s their dream pet? Panther or Dragon

5. do they have any pets at the moment? Shares a Sheepdog/Mutt with The Serpents,named Hot Dog.

#riverdale fanfiction #mughead #My OC #gif survey #oc survey

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amostimprobabledream · 5 years ago

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My thoughts on Peaky Blinders...

Now I’ve finished Season Five, I wanted to get out my thoughts/ideas/opinions regarding the show. So strap in! - So first of all, the fucking cinematopgraphy in this series is gorgeous. You could take almost any scene and it looks like a painting. The lighting, the way it’s staged, it’s all just so visually pleasing to look at. My inner film student was just sighing dreamily at the shot composition. There’s a shot of John, Arthur and Tommy walking somewhere and you could fucking frame it and put it in your wall. - CILLIAN MURPHY, CILLIAN MURPHY, CILLIAN MURPHY. I mean, I always knew he was a good actor and also a pretty one, I think the role I remember him best in is Batman Begins, but holy shit, I never realised how hot he is until like two months ago. I know he apparently hates his Tommy haircut, but good lord, he can pull it off. The cheekbones! The eyes! The eyelashes! The sexy voice! Needless to say I saw him and immediately developed the biggest fucking crush. Apparently when I talk about Tommy to people my face goes pink. Thank you so much, show, for enlightening me to this human. Tommy is such a fantastic character, and I do wonder if another actor could pull him off quite as well. So much debate over his actions, motives, mindset, etc. I could probably write essays about the complexities of Tommy, but I won’t because this is a long-ass post anyway. He’s such a boss and I would die for him. - I actually really like Arthur??? So the very first clip of PB I ever saw was accidental, when I happened to turn the TV on and the Blinders were taking over the Eden Club and Arthur was glassing a guy in the face. I thought, “Oh, he’s probably like the dangerous thug character everyone is scared of.” (I didn’t know he’s Tommy’s brother at the time.) But actually he’s kind of endearing despite being the Shelby’s pitbull? Idk, the concept of the “failure” elder brother, how Arthur is the character the verbalises PTSD the most out of everyone, how one minute he can be lashing out like a rabid bear and then sobbing like a kid the next... I’m always like, “Oh, Arthur,” because you can see he wants to be a better person, but he just...doesn’t know how. - JOOOHN. I miss him! And it’s weird because in the early parts of the Season John doesn’t DO much but tag around after Tommy and Arthur, but his marriage to Esme is actually So Good and again, he’s actually kind of a softboi under the hard gangster act. (Also his “Do THIS, John, Do THAT, John, KILL YOUR FOOKIN’ TEACHER, JOHN!” is so fucking good.) He kind of provides a lightness when contrasted to Tommy and Arthur that I really do miss, because the last two Seasons have been very grim and I think John’s absence has something to do with it. I liked Esme too, even if she’s a stroppy bitch, her love for John but resentment of her role in the family and also she’s HELLA PRETTY. I’m sad her character has gone for now, but at least she wasn’t killed off. - I also love Ada a lot - I was really shocked when I read that Sophie Rundle hasn’t been acting all that long before she got the part in PB, because honestly she’s very good! And her concept again is a fun one - the only girl in a family of violent gangster boys. (Or as Freddy puts it, “The only princess”, which she is.) Having said that, I’m not sure how I feel about Ada’s character arc over the course of the season. In One she came off as kind of childish and still sort of stuck in her Rebellious Teen phase, then she became a mother and Freddie died, then in Season Two she’s trying to distance herself from the family and go legit, then in Season Four and Five she’s helping run the business and taking money from Tommy. Idk, I wish she’d play a more major role like her brothers because her motivations seem to change based on what the screenwriter wants, not what feels natural for her. Plus it annoys me that Ada blamed Ben Younger’s death on Tommy, but Tommy gets a lot of blame for things that aren’t his fault so I guess he’s used to it. Still, Ada is still a lot of fun when she does get to play a big role and gets some great lines later on. “Tommy Shelby is going to stop a revolution with his cock.” - POLLY, MY QUEEN! Easily the best woman on the show (sorry, Ada) and such a fucking badass. She’s definitely the voice of reason within the family and conflicting loyalty is a really interesting theme that gets explored with her, between her arguing nephews and niece, between her family or whether she wants to marry again and leave, her relationship with Michael, it’s all so great. Helen McRory is such a brilliant addition to the show. Also I love that Polly kinda represents women taking over after all the men went away to war and now they’re back, but the women aren’t just going to creep back into the house - World War One changed the workplace forever for women and I think Polly being the second in command after Tommy reflects that really well. - I think overall my favourite seasons have been Seasons One, Two and Four, I tend to find I get a bit bored in Peaky Blinders whenever it gets especially heavy on politics like in Season Three and Five and I admittedly kind of miss the simplicity of the early days of the show when it was about horse-racing, but the Changretta vs Shelby feud was genuinely really gripping and Adrien Brody was also Very Good. (I mean, I couldn’t take him seriously because of Brodyquest, but I like him a lot.) - I HATE GRACE. There, I said it. And honestly I have SO MUCH to say on why I hate her and also why I think she is the epitome of bad writing that has happened on this show that I might as well save it for a whole nother post, but Tommy and Grace’s relationship always felt so unnatural and forced to me, like they are in love because the screenwriter said so - Grace is the only woman Tommy knows who isn’t related to him and also because it pisses off Campbell. Like, she was tolerable if highly irritating in Season One, but then Two came along and she just got worse and worse. She’s annoyingly convinced she’s better than everyone else, pulls off a LOT of questionable shit that NO-ONE except Polly ever pulls her up on and Tommy repeatedly pining over a woman who lied to him and betrayed him makes no goddamn sense. I wish Stephen Knight would just let him get over her, because her showing up over and over again in the show after the bitch died two Seasons ago is so infuriating I want to throw my remote at the TV. The best bit of Season Three was someone finally putting a bullet in her, honestly. /rant - On that note, I really wish that they’d use May properly. She was introduced in Season Two and honestly her chemistry with Tommy is about a thousand times more believable than anything he had with Guuuhrayce and also May doesn’t consistently talk in that annoying, breathy voice and also she doesn’t shamelessly manipulate Tommy constantly. It’s too bad Stephen Knight couldn’t get Charlotte Riley back for Season Three owing to her pregnancy, because I think the trajectory of the show would have been very different. But her scene where she spoke about her husband and tried to hide that she was crying? So good. The fucking Face Tommy gives her when she asks for a mixer in her gin? Priceless. Agh - May’s been chronically underused in the show but she keeps getting mentioned every now and then, so I’m hoping there are plans for her to come back in Season Six. I really like her and I honestly think Tommy/May has been the best relationship he’s had, because it’s the only one that’s felt A) Natural and B) Equal. - Lizzie Stark. Okay, so I have mixed feelings about Lizzie. I liked her in Seasons One and Two, because she was this down-on-her-luck woman who was treated like crap by everyone, but she wasn’t wholly without her own flaws or personality - she did lie to John and Tommy did act in his brother’s best interests to tell him the truth. The scenes she had with Tommy in Season Two when he promotes her to his secretary were honestly very cute and my heart broke for her when that solider nearly (?) raped her in Season Two and she cried in John’s arms. But over time she’s started to irritate me. I know that people feel bad for her because Tommy honestly does treat her badly at times, though other times she’s also one of the few people he’s nice to, their relationship is complicated. But truthfully I don’t see Tommy/Lizzie every working out properly because Lizzie was a whore. She’s always been Tommy’s inferior and while I do think he cares for her, she never seems to think it’s enough. He doesn’t love her enough and she’s never satisfied with it and she’s always resentful of him. But you can’t FORCE someone to love you and it’s interesting that the minute she learned she was pregnant, you could see her thinking of how to make this work. She pulled the Baby Trap on him just like Grace did and got married like she wanted, but Tommy still doesn’t truly see her as his equal. And honestly, I don’t think she’s smart enough for him. Add that to Lizzie being EXTREMELY petty to other women (including her being really rude to May and slut-shaming her - bit rich from you, isn’t it, Lizzie?), and I don’t think they have a healthy relationship. I do like little Ruby a lot (way more than Charles, who is a spoiled brat because he’s Grace’s son and has a martyred dead mummy), but honestly I don’t see Tommy/Lizzie working out. I just hope that she doesn’t leave and take Ruby, I think it’d break Tommy to have his daughter taken away from him. - Alfie Solomons. So...I have to confess I have mixed feelings about Alfie. I liked him in Season Two because he’s batshit crazy, Tom Hardy is clearly having the time of his life and it’s refreshing to have a rival to Tommy who isn’t cartoonishly evil like Billy Kimber or Sabini. He ties into Season Two very well and yeah, I can see why he’s so popular. Also he’s pretty attractive, so that always helps. But. Alfie is starting to come across a bit like a creator’s pet to me. He consistently betrays Tommy every goddamn Season and while I know the fandom love to joke about this, it’s pretty inexplicable that Tommy would bother to continue to do business with him after being burned so many times and now it turns out he’s alive. Why? Why bring Alfie back? I feel like he was brought back because he’s a fan favourite and to add another suspect to who betrayed Tommy. I don’t hate Alfie at all, but I am starting to wish he’d face actual consequences for his actions, considering every Peaky Blinders character who fucks with the Peaky Blinders tend to suffer horribly for it, but not Alfie...for some reason. - Michael. Okay so Michael’s actor is pretty damn good and I thought it was cute that he and John’s actors are actually brother irl - you can see the resemblance. And honestly bringing back Polly’s missing kids was a really clever idea because there’s a family tie, but one that isn’t so strong you can always be sure of where his loyalties lie. His subplot with Father Hughes in Season Three was both very sad and very well done - I was cheering him on the whole way. But Season Five has made my opinion of Michael take a dramatic nosedive. He’s gone from sorta-sympathetic to an entitled brat almost overnight. I get he’s probably salty about being banished to America by Tommy in Season Four, but where has this sudden desire to rule the company come from? How did he meet Gina? Is he lying about Gina being pregnant because he figured it’d win him sympathy? I don’t know. He’s changed so drastically, and when Polly gave him that slap, I think she was doing what everyone wanted to. It’s too bad they just wrote Anna off as being dead, though, Michael having a sister and Polly a daughter would have been interesting. - The music?? Is so good?? I love it! Especially the themesong, obviously, but so much of it is always ON POINT. It makes me wanna buy the entire soundtrack. - Unpopular opinion, but I think Campbell was the best antagonist of the show, mainly because he was a vile person but still believable and had the best dynamic with Tommy. - Season Five was honestly kind of hit-and-miss for me, it seemed like a lot of people are pissed at Tommy for fairly silly reasons in the beginning and I just didn’t find the political subplot all that interesting...but I still will definitely tune into Season Six. (Also these are all just opinions, so please don’t send me hate if you don’t like something I’ve said. Ain’t nobody got time for that.)

#Peaky Blinders #Tommy Shelby #Arthur Shelby #John Shelby #Ada Shelby #Polly Gray #Michael Gray #Esme Shelby #Grace Burgess #May Carleton #Lizzie Stark #Alfie Solomons #Chester Campbell #Blogging #Thoughts

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al-norton · 5 years ago

Note

Death Note ask 1

Hey thanks for asking! It’s been a lot of time since I’ve read the manga, but I’ve rewatched the anime recently so I’ll be answering according to the show's version of events.

Favorite character: so I watched the anime for the first time when I was, like, 13. Ever since I went through violent phases of liking L and then Light and then L and then Light. But right now I actually like Near the most, because he’s very cool, low-key hilarious and also I can heavily project into him being nonbinary and depressed so... L and Light still hold the honor spots ‘cause they are amazing characters and central staples of the conflict, but Near holds my heart.

Least Favorite character: idk, Higuchi? the Sakura-TV guy? I mean they both feel like plot devices more than actual characters, so I don’t mind a lot

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): honestly, not a lot ships in this one... Light/L, Misa/Rem, Mello/Matt, that’s about it

Character I find most attractive: Aizawa! Also, Misa’s cute goth style has really grown on me over the years... they really had to nerf her for the second half of the show, huh. What pisses me off is that in canon it’s probably Light that forces her to change her style since after his death she goes right back into gothic attire. And it makes so much sense for her character too because being goth is about building a comfortable relationship with death and mourning. And Light takes that away from her, what a bitch!

Character I would marry: oof I have survival instinct hight enough to avoid any of those.

Character I would be best friends with: Matt! He looks like he would be cool to discuss video-games with and would not be too judgy about me being dumber than them geniuses.

a random thought fact: I like the second opening so much that I can totally sing it from my memory, but I don’t really know the lyrics so it probably sounds horrible. Great fun at parties, though

An unpopular opinion: pass

My Canon OTP: Mello/Matt. Fight me

My Non-canon OTP: Misa/Rem... the pining... the devotion... like idk to my eyes Rem is canonically in love with Misa and Misa was canonically flirting with Rem but ehhh sometimes straight girls just be like that. It would be super amazing if Misa could get together with someone who actually appreciates her, though.

Most Badass Character: Mello! the mafia boi has balls of steel! But I got to admit he kind of gets it from L (the scene where he confronts and taunts Kira via tv-broadcast still gets me chills)

Most Epic Villain: Light is a Legend of a villain and I love him wholeheartedly.

Pairing I am not a fan of: Light/any fucking person, Light is banned from having a relationship. YEAH I know I listed Light/L as one om my fave ships. I... may elaborate on a separate post

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): oh, you know, the usual. The female characters. Misa, Takada. The way writers push these two successful and clever women to catfight over a cop who treats them like shit and wears fucking khakis is just insulting! And with Takada, for a pretty long time, she was like the only character who had Kira’s real identity. And we don’t even get an explanation on why she supports Kira, or any of her personal beliefs... Mikami gets like an entire episode of flashbacks, come on :(

Favorite Friendship: Light and L. No hear me out! Like obv they are both really maladapted individuals but in kind of complementary way (L is obvious to social protocol and rituals, but pretty in touch with his feelings and gut feelings, while Light is master in manipulation and presenting a perfect image, but unable to connect to anybody due to the god complex). When L declares Light his friend it sounds a little out of nowhere, but if you think about it, it ticks all the boxes - they share similar interests and spend a lot of time together doing fun activities. And of course, L likes Light, because he’s so smart and so helpful, and, even if he’s Kira, they just feel as equals! A feeling probably rare for both of them. But the best part, the irony of this relationship is... Light, being a dumbass that he is, doesn’t realize it until L is dead. Until he danced on L’s grave. Until he’s dying himself. Light is choking on his self-importance, but in the second half of the show, it doesn’t even feel like there’s a rivalry between him and Near or Mello, because there isn’t one! They are rivals/friends/equals to each other, Light is like a prize, a finish line for them. It’s a great tragedy, killing the only person that could become your friend, and realizing it only years after the fact. Like, respect and companionship are, arguably, as big a theme as Justice is in Death Note, so they explore it a lot. But this dynamic is 100% my favorite.

Character I most identify with: Soichiro, probably? he’s chill and has a great moral compass, but is absolutely not equipped for the battle of supernatural and genius minds, which is a mood. Also, Ryuk is a cool stand-in of the audience, he works very well.

Character I wish I could be: one of the detectives! it just would be cool to hang out

#Anonymous #fandom opinions

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deepdaleducks · 6 years ago

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Slow Burn - Dele

Author’s Note So I got the idea for this based on a conversation @forza-atleti and I had this morning so I kinda had to write it asap. Idk if I have much else to say, I have some ideas for a second part of this so if you want more, let me know. I didn’t proof read any of it so if you see any mistakes, point them out nicely. I love getting feedback from you guys and I’m really enjoying writing at the moment so thanks for enjoying reading it!! Love you all x

“Hey erm, I kinda have to bail on tonight. I know we said we’d stay home and watch movies but, err, something’s come up and I can’t anymore. I’ll defo see you Sunday though, yeah? I’m sorry and erm have a good weekend.” You’d listened to the voicemail he’d left on your phone what felt like a million times. You knew exactly what the something that had come up was. Or who it was for that matter. His ex-girlfriend, Ruby. They’d broken up about a month ago, but it had been long and drawn out. He would still call her at night and sometimes she’d go to his place. And in the mornings, he would be at your front door, regret on his face, ranting about how he just can’t seem to leave her. How unfollowing her on Instagram didn’t seem to work because his car still knew the exact route to her house, even if he wasn’t planning to drive there. How he’d memorised her number, so deleting it was no good. How she was his biggest weakness. You would make him a cup of tea and some toast and tell him that with time and distance things will heal. That moving on to other people will help him get over her. How spending time with other people would distract him from thinking about going to her house.

That’s how your Valentine’s Day plans had come about. No boyfriends or girlfriends, no exes or drunk dials, just the two of you, friends, together with a movie and a take away pizza. It wasn’t going to be a date, and you weren’t going to tell him. Not that it didn’t hurt when you got his message. Not that it didn’t break your heart a little when you realised that he was choosing her over you. So instead of pizza and movies, its wine and Grey’s Anatomy. And if he shows up tomorrow, its ‘I’m late for work’. But from the look of her Instagram story, a fancy restaurant in the city, he won’t be showing up in the morning anyway.

Your phone buzzes with a text, pulling you from your third episode of the night.

Chlo: Soooooo, how’s your night going?? If you don’t reply I know what you’re up to😉😉 get it girl!!!

When you’d told her about your plans for Valentine’s Day she’s shrieked in excitement. She had been begging you to reveal your true feelings to Dele for weeks and when she found out about his break up, she’d called you immediately saying that this was your chance. You’d insisted that this wasn’t your chance and that if you told him now, you’d just be a rebound and everything would fall apart. Instead you went for the option of being a shoulder to cry on and letting your friendship grow. You typed in a quick reply before turning back to the tv.

Me: He bailed. Back with her, I guess.

Her reply comes through almost instantly. You pause the tv and head into the kitchen to fill your wine, figuring that if you were gonna be texting for a while you may as well get another glass.

Chlo: Oh babe.

Chlo: ….

Before she has the chance to type any more, you change the subject quickly.

Me: It’s fine. How was your night with Jesse? His leg doing okay?

The two of you had become friends at the World Cup last summer. You’d bonded in the family and friend’s area of the stands over being two of the most outraged people there. You were both yelling over the referee’s poor decision. Somehow that led to you talking and becoming friends. When you’d introduced yourself as Dele’s friend, she’d quickly joked about how she thought Dele had gotten a new girlfriend, and you could tell she’d regretted it. “She doesn’t like me, either” You’d replied, and her face was flooded with relief. Since then, you were constantly texting, meeting up in each other’s city, watching the boys at games.

Chlo: Oi oi, don’t try to change the subject. We’re just having the night in, Jess is fine. Are you okay though?

Her text flashes up and then seconds later a call is coming through. You answer, sipping on your wine before talking.

“Chlo, I’m fine honestly. It’s Valentine’s Day, of course he’s gonna go back to her, I don’t know why we didn’t see it coming.” You say before she can even begin to rant about how shitty his actions were.

“Nah, that was a shitty thing for him to do. Imma be having words, swear down.” You hear Jesse’s voice echo in, realising you were on speaker phone, you chime in a ‘hey Jess’. You laugh at his threats.

“Yeah, babe, everyone and their grandma’s cat knows that she treats him badly. I don’t get why he can’t see that.” Chloe sighs. The three of you were biased for sure, with neither of you being her biggest fan, but it wasn’t hard to deny that she did treat him badly. And you would treat him so much better.

“There’s not much I can do about it though, is there? Like hey Del, break up with your girlfriend I love you more than she ever could. He’s not exactly going to fall into my arms. He’s wrapped around her finger, for fuck’s sake.” You reply, trying to push down any feelings for him that were rising in your heart.

“What are you doing this weekend? You wanna come up and stay with us?” She asks impulsively. Despite your usual plans to see Dele on Sunday, you agree, planning to make the drive up tomorrow after work. “I know your heart is hurting right now, babe, but he’ll see the light eventually. We’ll make sure of it.” She finishes.

“Hell yeah, we will!” Jesse yells from the background. With that you hang up and head upstairs to pack a small bag for your impromptu weekend away.

When you get out of work on Friday night, you immediately get in the car and begin the four hour drive up to Manchester. The traffic delays don’t phase you, the promise of a warm home cooked meal keeping you on. Your car pulls into the drive of your friend’s house, the warm lights from inside welcoming you. Inside you find Chloe and Jesse, taking your bag and coat.

“Surprise!” a familiar voice yells, emerging from the living room. You turn to see Marcus walking over to you with his arms open to hug you. “Been way too long, chuck,” he says, squeezing you tightly.

“Yeah sorry, I couldn’t come to see you at Fulham the other week. Work’s been so busy recently.” You respond pulling away. “Alright, not to be rude, but I’m starving so where’s the food?”

The four of you head into the dining room, engorging on a meal prepared by Chloe. Jesse claims to have helped with the cooking but you and Marcus both return with jokes about how Jesse has absolutely no cooking ability whatsoever and that the boy couldn’t even chop a carrot if he tried.

The night passes by with ease, as you share jokes and stories. Marcus talks about the girl he’s been seeing, and Jesse teases that she’s so out of Marcus’ league. The boys tell stories from training and talk about how rough its going to be now Jesse is injured. And Dele doesn’t cross your mind once. No thought about how she was probably in his bed right now. About how things should be different.

In the morning, Chloe takes you to brunch and then you head out for some retail therapy. She forces you to buy a new black dress, claiming that you should find a date for next weekend and wear the dress to knock the socks of your suitor.

“You now I’ve tried dating other people, Chlo. I have. Do you not remember Jake? Or Ben? Or that guy I went out with like a month ago!” You protest. Dating other people hadn’t been successful albeit. Every time you found something that felt that it could work, Dele would show up at your door in the night, eyes puffy from crying, voice hoarse from yelling, and you would let him in again. He would fall into your bed, and you’d hold his hands whilst he slept. He would tell you that he was never going to find anyone else like you. And then he would leave in the morning and go back to her. Like clockwork.

“Yeah but Jake was the opposite of everything you want so that was never gonna work, and Ben was a dickhead anyway. Besides, if Del sees you dating someone else it might make him a little jealous. Remind him that he’s not the only guy in your life, yeah?” She gives you a look that says I’m right and you best believe me, so you slowly nod your head in response, convincing yourself that her plan is good one.

She’s called into work in the afternoon and you’re left at home with Jesse, who’s still resting from his injury. You flick through Sky Movies together trying to find a film that suits both of your tastes. You want romcom and he wants action which leads to the two of you bickering like siblings over the remote. Pausing as you flick past The Proposal, you turn to look at him.

“I noticed you still didn’t put a ring on Chloe’s finger this Valentine’s then.” You tease, eying his response carefully. They’d been together for a while and you and Marcus had made bets on when they’d get engaged before Christmas, with him thinking it would be in the summer and you insisting it had to happen soon.

“Nah, nah, Valentine’s proposals are cringing as fuck man. That’s so typical. I don’t want her to be expecting it, so I’m skipping Christmas, Valentine’s, her birthday, our anniversary, none of that.” He defends himself, shaking his head.

“Christ, Jess. At this rate I’m gonna be getting married before you and I’m in love with a guy who is constantly going back to his ex.” You joke, the words stinging a little as you say them.

“It’ll happen soon, I swear. Maybe next month, who knows? March is nothing important, right?” He pauses to look you over, “Do you, though? Love him?” His question puts you on edge. No one had ever asked you that before. Sure, Chloe had teased you about your crush and about the fact you liked him. But the word love had never come up. Especially not in this content. Your mind spins as you think, but quickly enough, you have one clear thought.

“How could I not?” You ask, like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

It’s 9pm before you finally hear from him. You never replied to his voicemail on Thursday and since then the two of you hadn’t interacted.

Del: We still on for brunch tomorrow morning? I’ll pick you up at 10 x

Me: In Manchester so I can’t.

Your reply is blunt, but worthy. He bailed on you, so you’re bailing on him. As much as he could have you like butter in his hands, you wanted to show a little distance. The distance crumbles when his face flashes on your screen displaying an incoming call and you answer immediately.

“What the fuck are you doing in Manchester?” He asks with a tone of anger in his voice. “Were you just not planning to tell me you were cancelling on our weekly brunch?”

You scoff in response, “That’s a little rich coming from you right now, Dele. Chloe and Jesse called me on Thursday night and invited me up for the weekend, so I happily accepted.” Throwing in the detail that they invited you on Thursday was done to spite him. You were supposed to see him on Thursday, and hopefully him realising that you had other offers would hurt a little.

“Oh right,” he mutters in response. “I guess we’ll have to do it another time then.”

“Yeah maybe…” You trail off, “Look, I gotta go. I, erm, I’ll see you when I’m back sometime.” Hanging up the phone you leave it in the kitchen, heading back into the living room to watch more tv with your friends. When you retire up to bed you leave your phone downstairs, happy to not be distracted by any social media or messages. Your phone sits on the kitchen counter, 10 unread text messages and 3 missed calls unnoticed on the screen.

You’re sound asleep when you hear a banging on the door downstairs, followed by three more rings of the doorbell. You slowly pull yourself from the comfort of your bed and throw your dressing gown on, heading out in to the hall to see what’s causing all the noise. Jesse emerges from the master throwing a t-shirt on.

“You stay here, I’ll go see what it is.” He says sleepily. Waiting at the top of the staircase, you hear him open the door and mumble a “what are you doing here, it’s the middle of the night”. Straining your ears, you try to make out the other voice. It sounds familiar and the pieces of conversation you hear help you to piece it all together.

“I need to speak to her…”

“Look bro, it’s the middle of the night.”

“No but I need to see her.”

“I don’t know if she wants to see you… Come back tomorrow maybe, man.”

“I need to tell her it’s over.”

The last thing you hear sends you down the stairs tentatively. He stands there in the entrance hall, joggers and a t-shirt, bags under his eyes, presumably from driving all night, hair a mess, eyes pleading. Jesse looks between you and notices his que to leave, heading upstairs with a whispered shout if you need me.

“It’s over?” You ask, not stepping any further in his direction. He nods weakly in reply. You feel like you’re having déjà vu, flashing back to this exact situation a few weeks ago. You remember him crying, saying those same words. Then you remember him going back to her, and again and again. A bitter taste appears on your tongue and you feel a sudden urge to get a glass of water.

“Good for you,” you mutter, walking straight past him towards the kitchen. He follows you instantly, keeping his distance on the other side of the room.

“Good for me?” He hisses quietly, careful not to make any noise. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means I don’t think you’re telling the truth.” You huff, looking at him tiredly. “It means that I’ve been down this road so many times with you recently, Del, that I’m just bored of it.”

“No, I’m serious. It’s over.” He pleads with you, moving closer. You don’t respond and a silence settles between the two of you for a minute. You stare out the window into the garden and he stands behind you at a distance, facing in the same way. He eyes your reflection in the mirror and your eyes meet. “You know how I know it’s over? Friday morning, we wake up and we agree to go to dinner in the evening, right. And she calls me later saying, she’s invited to some club event and she’s gonna have to skip the dinner, am I arsed about it? No, not really. But then yesterday, hearing that you’re not coming to brunch and that you’re all the way up in Manchester and I had no idea. That broke my heart. Because I pushed you out of my life, and I don’t ever want you to not be a part of my life.” When he pauses to breath you turn around to look at him, leaning back against the counter. “I’ve been pushing you away to be with her and she’s not worth me losing you.”

Everything he’s saying sounds sweet. Perfect, in fact. But he’s still not saying the one thing you want to hear. He’s not saying he loves you, that he’s in love with you. And right now, as much as you want his attention, every second of his time isn’t worth it if he doesn’t love you back. The pain of him being your friend, but not yours, would be too much.

“Okay, well. I, um.” You stutter, lost for words. “I don’t think I can be your friend right now because…” The words are right there on your lips. Because I’m in love with you. You drop your eyes to the floor and attempt to move past him, out from where he’s trapped you in the corner of the kitchen.

“Because what? Because you’re in love with me?” His words echo your thoughts.

His words stop you in your tracks. “How do you know that?” you ask, not turning back to look at him.

“She pointed it out. Ruby. She’s the one who noticed it.” He stops for a minute, hoping you’ll lift your head, or turn around in interested. “She said she could tell by the way you looked at me, or the way your face would light up whenever you talked about me. It’s, uh, why we broke up actually. She was constantly scared I was gonna leave her for you, and I could never see it and thought she was just being jealous.”

If what he was saying was true, and he knew that you were in love with him, why was he constantly falling back into her bed. Why was he still putting her above you in his list of priorities?

“So, what? You know I’m in love with you, you break up with your girlfriend over it, cry on my shoulder and then still go back to sleep with her? None of that adds up, Dele. I don’t know what you’re doing, but whatever it is, it’s fucked up.”

He falters whilst processing your words. “I thought it wasn’t true. You never said you were in love with me and I didn’t wanna just spring it on you and ruin everything. I don’t know what I was doing, okay?” He says louder in frustration, throwing his hands in the air. “I’ve been in love with you since the day we met. But you were dating some guy, and she came along, and I just told myself to forget it. Then she goes and makes statements like that and it messes with my head.”

“You’re in love with me?” You ask, the new realisation sending excitement through your veins. Eyes finally meeting his for the first time in minutes.

“I am so fucking in love with you.” He grins cheekily. Hearing those words come out of his mouth dissipates every negative emotion that you’d been harbouring in the last few weeks. You feel the immediate pull of his gravity, drawing you across the kitchen into his arms. His lips crash against yours in an instant, lighting your entire body on fire. Its urgent and fierce and screams we’ve waited years to do this. When you part for breath, he rests his forehead against yours, and your eyes flutter open to meet his.

“What does this mean?” You ask, hesitantly.

“It means that we’re gonna go upstairs and sleep. Then tomorrow, we’re gonna wake up and I’m gonna take you on a date to get breakfast. And then I’m going to pay to get your car sent back to London, because in the afternoon I’m gonna drive you home.” He gives you another short sweet peck.

Your fingers find his and you drag him upstairs to the spare bedroom you’d been staying in. You fall into bed together, not for the first time, but when he reaches out for your hand like always, this time he uses it to pull you closer to him, and you know that tomorrow, he won’t be leaving.

READ PART TWO HERE

#footballer imagine #dele #dele alli #jesse lingard #marcus rashford #writing #idk what else to hashtag #slow burn

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actuallyvady · 5 years ago

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Vague babbling about why I’m so attached to Into the Spider-verse: Chapter One, in which I was disappointed by Endgame:

Y’all know I love Marvel. And I’ve been a fan of the MCU since phase one, though over time my enjoyment has shifted-- I loved the first Avengers film when it came out but I have since come to deeply dislike it. I had lost faith in the MCU around the time Age of Ultron came out... and then phase three happened. I think all of my contenders for best Marvel movie were in phase three; I deeply enjoyed the aesthetic and lightheartedness of Ragnarok, Black Panther is simply a work of art from start to finish, and I love that Doctor Strange wins the day with cleverness instead of an out-and-out physical brawl, which had always been the case even with the other “genius” characters in the universe.

But going into Infinity War I was still not hopeful; the years had made me no longer trust the franchise as a whole. Leaving Infinity War, it felt like that had changed.

This may not be a popular opinion, but frankly, I thought IW was a masterpiece; it felt balanced in all the right ways, used its time wisely, never spent too long with any one character set, and all of them felt well-written, consistent with their characterization from previous films... there were only two things that didn’t work for me, and neither was the fault of the movie itself:

1. The dusted characters were always going to come back, and I knew that for meta reasons-- Bucky was the first one to go, and I knew Sebastian Stan had a much longer contract outstanding. Combine that with several others who had upcoming sequels, like Doctor Strange, and it took away the impact of the “deaths.”

2. The fan reaction to Thanos’s motivation was... off-putting, to put it mildly. No, Thanos is not right. Thanos is very, very wrong. Thanos acquired godlike power and decided that killing people was the best use of it. You are not edgy or clever or interesting for “agreeing” with him, you need help.

That said, I still felt that IW was incredibly well done, and I was excited to see how they finished it. (Yes, “finished.” IW was Act One and anyone who was praising Disney for “letting the villain win” doesn’t understand how storytelling works.)

And then Endgame came out.

And it was a disappointing mess.

Why?

Because it was powered by fanservice instead of actually making any goddamn sense.

When asked about it, I will usually say that it was “satisfying.” That was the goal. Give all the fans what they wanted. Give Steve a happily ever after. Give Tony a happy family and a heroic death. Give all the female fans a single, unimportant-to-the-plot girl power moment. Give people who liked Ragnarok a lead into Thor In Space Part 2 with the Guardians. Give everyone their faves back-- even Loki, whose death was far more real than the others.

You know what it felt like? It felt like a Moffat ending. Not the fan version of Moffat, who is somehow evil and likes killing people, the real thing-- the “I’m going to kill and bring back this character so many times he’s going to lampshade it in his final episode” Moffat, whose version of “killing off” those characters involved them living a long and happy life together. I suppose the mess of continuity they created with their time travel “rules” adds to that, lol.

So the faith that had recently been restored in the MCU? Gone. I will go and see more movies, I’m sure. It won’t be on opening night, probably. I no longer pay attention to news of future movies/shows, My friends talk about them, and that’s how I know any of it. (I’ll probably see the Loki tv series in gifs here rather than actually watching it, to be honest.)

And that’s where I’ve been, for months, until I finally got around to watching Into the Spider-verse-- I had been hearing that it was amazing since it came out, i was really happy it got the best animated feature oscar, but I just hadn’t sat down to watch it. But I think Endgame really poised me to appreciate it that much more, because Endgame just... wasn’t.

I have every intention of posting about everything that I love about into the spiderverse... but this post is already long enough, and besides, I haven’t quite managed to articulate why it impacted me so much. But I feel like it stands in stark contrast to what the MCU has become, and acknowledging how I feel about the MCU at this point really serves to highlight everything that spiderverse did right. Like... I would have loved it no matter what. In some ways, finally watching spiderverse allowed me to really understand why endgame was so bad? IDK. But there we are.

#personal #these are my opinions and i understand that other people feel differently #i am not pretending any of this is universal truth

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luvneedsnosyt · 5 years ago

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My Favorite Albums of May 2019

My Previous monthly lists from 2019: January, February, March, April

You can find my list of my favorite albums of 2018 here And my list of my favorite EPs of 2018 here

Best:

Ally & AJ - Sanctuary EP Genre: Pop

Proof: Church / Not Ready to Wake Up

Ari Lennox - Shae Butter Baby Genre: R&B

Proof: BMO / Broke (Feat. JID)

Barrie - Happy to Be Here Genre: Indie Pop

Proof: Dark Tropical / Clovers

BAYNK - Someone’s II Genre: Synth Pop

Proof: Settle (Feat. Sinead Harnett) / Go with U

Beast Coast (Pro Era, Flatbush Zombies & The Underachievers) - Escape From New York Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Left Hand / Bones

B00TY - High Art EP Genre: Synth Pop / Funk / Dance

Proof: Trust Me (Feat. Kill Nigel) / Blowing Up My Phone

Carly Rae Jepsen - Dedicated Genre: Synth Pop

Proof: No Drug Like Me / Right Words Wrong Time

Charley Bliss - Young Enough Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative

Proof: Capacity / Chatroom

Denzel Curry - ZUU Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: RICKY / BIRDZ (Feat. Rick Ross)

Diplo - Higher Ground EP Genre: Electronic / House / Dance

Proof:Hold You Tight / Win Win (Feat. Tove Lo) // Bonus: Spicy (Spice Girls Cover/Rework) w/ Herve Pagez Feat. Charli XCX

Dog Blood (Skrillex & Boys Noize) - Turn Off The Lights EP Genre: Electronic / Dance / Dubstep

Proof: BREAK LAW / TURN OFF THE LIGHTS

DUCKWRTH - THE FALLING MAN Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: FALL BACK / A WILDFIRE (Feat. Mr. Carmack & Allan Kingdom)

Elohim - BRAINDEAD EP Genre: Electronic / Synth-Pop

Proof: tv / flagpole sitta (Harvey Danger cover w/ AWOLNATION)

Emotional Oranges - The Juice, Vol. 1 Genre: R&B / Neo-Soul

Proof: Personal / Unless You’re Drowning

FRENSHIP - Vacation Genre: Synth-Pop

Proof: Remind You / Wide Open // Bonus: MI Amore / LOVE Somebody

HÆLOS - Any Random Kindness Genre: Electronic / House

Proof: Kyoto / Empty Skies

Injury Reserve - Injury Reserve Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Jailbreak the Tesla (Feat. Aminé) / Wax On (Feat. Freddie Gibbs)

Izzy Bizu - GLITA EP Genre: R&B / Soul

Proof: Lights On / Someone That Loves You ‘19 (w/ Chris Martin)

Jamila Woods - LEGACY! LEGACY! Genre: R&B / Neo-Soul

Proof: ZORA / BALDWIN (Feat. Nico Segal)

Kaskade - Redux 003 Genre: Electronic / Dance

Proof: Go Slow (w/ Gorgon City Feat. Roméo) / Love Me Like You Used To (Feat. Cecilia Gault)

Kishi Bashi - Omoiyari Genre: Indie Pop

Proof: Summer of ‘42 / Violin Tsunami

Lucky Daye - Painted Genre: R&B / Soul

Proof: Concentrate / Paint It

Matinee Commune - PDA Genre: Electronic / Future Bass

Proof: Famous (Feat. Cassandra Violet) / Carried Away (Feat. Allie Crystal)

MorMor - Some Place Else EP Genre: alt-R&B / Indie Pop

Proof: Outside / Pass The Hours

NIKI - wanna take this downtown? Genre: R&B

Proof: urs / move!

Skepta - Ignorance is Bliss Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Bullet From A Gun / No Sleep

SNBRN - Solé Genre: Electronic / House

Proof: Feel My Love / Never Let You Go

SonReal - The Aaron LP Genre: Indie Pop / Alternative / Hip Hop

Proof: Fearless / Quit

SYML - SYML Genre: Indie Pop / Alternative

Proof: Wildfire / Break Free

TOBi - STILL Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Locked In / Come Back Home (Feat. VanJess)

Tyler, The Creator - IGOR Genre: Hip Hop / R&B

Proof: EARFQUAKE (Feat. Playboy Carti, Charlie Wilson & Jessy Wilson) / I THINK (Feat. Solange)

Vampire Weekend - Father of the Bride Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative

Proof: This Life / Sympathy

Bonus:

Some previous projects I missed early and found during May.

The Grouch - Unlock The Box Released December 2018 Genre: Indie Hip Hop

Proof: Feel Alone / Pretty (Feat. YMTK)

The Grouch & DJ Fresh - The Tonight Show with The Grouch Released December 2018 Genre: Indie Hip Hop

Proof: Devoted / Indigo 100

Kasbo - Places We Don’t Know Remix EP Released April 2019 Genre: Electronic / Future Bass

Proof: Over You (Super Duper Remix) Feat. Frida Sundemo / Aldrg Mer (EMBRZ Remix) Feat. TENDER

Others:

Adela - On The Line EP, The Amazons - Future Dust, Berner - El Chivo, Big Thief - U.F.O.F., Calboy - Wildboy, Chase & Status - RTRN II JUNGLE, Christelle Bofale - Swim Team EP, Ciara - Beauty Marks, Collie Buddz - Hybrid, Curren$y & Statik Selektah - Gran Turismo, DJ Khaled - Father of Asahd, Flying Lotus - Flamagra, The Get Up Kids - Problems, The Head and the Heart - Living Mirage, Holly Herndon - PROTO, Interpol - A Fine Mess EP, Jai Waetford - Figure It Out EP, JAMESDAVIS - MASTERPIECE EP, Jeremy Zucker & Chelsea Cutler - brent EP, jesse saint john - don’t stop dancing. life gets sad. EP, J-E-T-S - Zoospa, Josephine Wiggs - We Fall, Judah & The Lion - Pep Talks, Kevin Gates - Only The General Gon Understand EP, KIAN - BLISS EP, Logic - Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, Mac DeMarco - Here Comes the Cowboy, Maribou State - Kingdoms in Color Remixed, Megan Thee Stallion - Fever, Middle Kids - New Songs for Old Problems EP, Miley Cyrus - SHE IS COMING EP, The National - I Am Easy to Find, no rome - Crying In The Prettiest Places EP, Oliver Dion - Exposed, Patoranking - Wilmer, PnB Rock - TrapStar Turnt PopStar, PRETTYMUCH - Phases EP, Raveena - Lucid, Rhye - Spirit, Rotimi - Walk With Me EP, SAFE - STAY, Santi - Mandy & The Jungle, slowthai - Nothing Great About Britain , StayLoose - The City, Steve Lacy - Apollo XXI, Striking Matches - Morning EP, Styles P - S.P. The Goat: Ghost of All Time, Sufjan Stevens - Love Yourself / With My Whole Heart EP, Tank and the Bangas - Green Balloon, Taylor Bennett - The American Reject EP, Wu-Tang Clan - Of Mics and Men EP, Yeek - IDK WHERE, YG - 4REAL 4REAL

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parachutingkitten · 6 years ago

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Season 4 Analysis

STANDARD DISCLAIMER: I am going to be applying the concept of criticism to a TV show you presumably love and adore as much as I do. If you do not want your idea that the show is immaculate to be challenged, I would not advise reading past this point.

Mood for the season: It's a SuPeR fUn HaPpY pLaCe!!!!!

You don’t need to, but if you are interested, and haven’t seen my analysis of past seasons, you can find those here:

Pilot

Season 1

Season 2

Season 3

Hey guys! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Season 4! We are here! I am SO biased with this season. It has problems man. It has ALL the problems! ALL the plot holes! ALL the stupid, stupid stuff, but I LOVE ALL OF IT! okay, let's back up. I'm about to drop some context on you.

So, when you're a military brat you tend to make friends with whoever you can, and when I lived in Germany I had a friend who was fandom OBSESSED. She, at the time, was super into Homestuck, something I managed to avoid being sucked into, though I do know more about it than I would like. Anyway, this was the point at which I started getting sucked into Ninjago. So, I figured that if I could trust anyone with a strange obsession, it was her. I showed her the last episode of season 3, and she decided she was just going to dive head first into it with me. We watched season 4 together as it came out, we talked about it, had a bunch of inside jokes about it, I wrote some very short fanfiction about it, she made some OCs, one in particular that I remember was Stormy, a ditzy cloud master who wore pink, we shipped him with... one of my OCs, I don't remember. She hadn't watched the first two seasons, so I had to fill her in on a lot, but she was the first person I ever fandomed with, and it was over season 4. So I guess you could say season 3 was the grand beginning of my love for this show, and season 4 was the peak of my fangirl experience (at least for that phase of my life).

Plot

This season is a real mixed bag. Coming off the heels of the first season, nothing makes sense. Suddenly there are more elements, completely discrediting Lloyd's supposed power of four powers. And now it's genetic, which brings up the problem of Jay, who... if either Ed or Edna were masters, they would have slipped by now (but also like, how cool would it be if Edna just busted out with lightning powers) and then Zane who... doesn't have genes. It makes the world bigger, yes, but it also discredits the lore of the last two seasons, and brings up the question "Where the hell were the rest of the EMs when the Great Devour attacked? Or the stone warriors? Or the final battle?!" Anyway, it's a bit jarring and sudden to say the least. It definitely was not planned beforehand. There aren't even any hints in season 3. Like wouldn't it be cool if in season 3 we saw them go to the noodle shop, or Wu was really vague about elemental questions. It would make a lot more sense then. Idk. It opens the universe up to the plotlines of most of the future seasons, but it does sort of discredit the first two. This season is also kinda choppy feeling wise. You go from the mood the past season have had in the first episode to this sort of native tribal feel on the island, and then the factory and then back to Ninjago. It's kinda a mess. Overall it was just an excuse to put these characters in cool situations (which I have done before, I understand). Which I get, and it makes for some cool stuff, but I don't think any of it ends up meshing together super well in the end. When I think of this season I think of the tournament. I forget about the whole snake stuff at the end most of the time. I forget about the while Garmadon conflict. The fact that I forget that's there has to be a bad sign, right?

Characters

Character work this season is really pretty good for the most part! There are a lot of new characters. And they all are very distinct and fun, and even when two people you don't know especially well battle, you're still really invested. All of the Cole and Jay stuff is pretty good this season! Major upgrade from season 3. The whole fight scene is absolutely fantastic. Garmadon is freaking awesome this season. He keeps on trying to kill himself, and it's stupid, and the show sort of acknowledges that it's stupid, cuz Lloyd is just like 'dude, what the heck'. Kai's arch this season is pretty good, exploring his darker side and putting that intense conflict in front of him was good. I can tell you one thing, I like it a heck of a lot better than season 7, but we'll get to that when we get to that. So, yeah. Overall improvement in character! It doesn't dive super deep or anything, but it all works and is all interesting.

Skylor

So... she is one of the reasons I call this season the fanfiction season. We have a whole bunch of other elemental masters we've never heard of, and one of them their power is... all the powers. I can not tell you how much this ticked me off! And she hardly ever uses them! She has pretty much infinite power, and she doesn't think to use it, pretty much ever! There are no restrictions on her! This is what I hate Skylor for. And I do mean hate. BUT aside from that, strictly character wise she is done pretty well. She feels pretty fake and overly sassy at the beginning of the season, but there's a reason for that. It's an act. But it's not like she changed her personality to fool him, she intensified her personality to cover her intentions. Her arch feels pretty natural. That one scene where she does the evil laugh... that was weird. But aside from that, it feels okay. She was raised to think that lying and cheating is the norm, so when someone presents her with another option she begins to change. It makes sense. I love the scene where Kai and her look at each other through the prison bars and (even though their freaking legos) you can feel her realization that she's ashamed of what she's doing now. And after she makes the transition, she's just really chill. Like, I would like to hang out with her. I guess it is kinda sweet that even though she had all of the powers of... ever, at the end she's happy to just run her noodle shop. It's kinda poetic. Anyway, she may be a bit overpowered, and she feels like a bit of a Mary Sue, but overall her personality and interactions are enjoyable enough for me to mostly ignore that. I do agree that she is best used in moderation. She doesn't need to be part of the team. I wish we had a quick cameo each season, but whatever. What we have now in season 9 is nice, but she definitely needs to step back out of the spotlight in future seasons (knock on wood) in order to remain as likable as she's been.

Karlof

Love him. Freaking love him. Honestly, I probably relate to him the most. He's the first loser of the tournament, he avoids trouble, he sticks to what he knows, and he says it like it is. I love his interactions with everyone down in the noodle factory. He's like this perfect blend of optimism and pessimism. His interactions with Cole are beautiful. Their chemistry is really great. One of, I think everyone's favorite masters, and there's a reason why.

Shade

So... typical darkness character. Obviously selfish. But once the climax hits, I actually like him a lot. He kinda serves as an antagonist at first and then flips. It's kinda cool seeing a character with moral boundaries that far out. He's purposely suspicious to take attention away from Skylor, which I get. I think he has a lot of missed potential, but nonetheless, a decent character.

Neuro

I absolutely love his power! I love his manor, I love his voice. He may well be my favorite EM. I don't even know what else to say about this guy. If Karlof is who I am, Neuro is who I'd like to think I am. Calculated, calm, reasonable, and much like Karlof again, not too risky. I like him a lot. Cool guy. I like seeing how far he's willing to go for the ninja, and where certain lines are for him. It's kinda cool to watch. He could use a friend though. I HC he and Paleman hang out. Both quiet. Both reserved. Neuro could probably locate him in a room even if he's not visible. Idk. Anyway, I like him a lot! Great character.

Griffin Turner

Classic speedster. Good enough. Not much to say. He's fun. He's cool. He's what you'd expect. Decent screen time. None of it particularly character developing. For what he is, he's good at it.

Jacob

So, let's ignore the part where they made us think he was dead. He's a lot of fun. Good for them getting a blind character in there. Still confused on what his powers can... do? But I like his spunk. I think we all have a little soft spot for him.

Chamille

One of the only girls and she's pretty much evil. Why do girls have to be evil at one point to be interesting? Idk. Don't really care for her, don't really think much about her. Whatever. She's there. She serves her purpose. Fine. Okay. Moving on.

Paleman

Friggin love him. For the master of light to be invisible is a great move, and pretty creative. His voice is kinda obvious, but very distinct. It's a creative background character to have. I like him a lot. Again, I feel he could use some more love. See above Neuro HC. Like him a lot and... yay.

Bolobo

Kinda missed the "mother nature" pun... could have had at least one more female master... that's okay. He's cool enough. Kinda disappointing though. I mean, vines? Is that it?

Gravis

Gravity is a dang cool power. Idk what else to say. He doesn't get a ton of screen time, so it's hard to praise him too much, but yeah. I really like that. Actually had an FC (she was a villain but you know whateves) with the power, so seeing that be a real element they used is really cool.

Ash

I don't like him. He's very strange. He's just got that one laugh. He seems comically over the top a jerk. I like the way his mouth looks though. Unique and kinda cool. I was looking on his Wiki page, and it said he and Chamille kissed in the background at one point? Is that true? I am way curious now

Tox

Okay. She's nonexistent here, no personality. I guess she's kinda tough. Yeah, this gets confirmed later in season 9, when she speaks. But even there she's pretty nonexistent. Here's my idea. Instead of having all your females being 'tough' why not flip expectation on its head? I think it would be way funny and clever if the master of poison was super friendly, and bubbly, and genuinely a nice person. I'm thinking almost like Jay's (lightning... or I guess adopted) mom, levels of talkative and nice. Wouldn't that be kinda fun? Idk. Whatever. It is what it is.

Kapau and Chope

Best villains ever 10/10. 'Nuff said.

Romance

KAILOR

Okay, I freaking love them! They're not my favorite couple or anything, but they work really, really well… under certain conditions. There are a few bumps I can't ignore. Can we have a protagonist in the show who doesn't send googly eyes at their future love interest the first moment they see her? And remember when they made us think Kai and Skylor were related... yeah... why did we need to do that? That was... kinda uncomfortable. BUT other than that, Skylor is exactly what Kai needed. First, he needed a redhead. Duh. Second, he needed someone who would see right through his Kai shmoltz and be real with him. Third, she had to be fun. And finally, she needed to wear the pants in the relationship. And Skylor fills ALL of those requirements! I like that Kai falls for her right away, and I love that she doesn't think she likes him until... she totally does and it's like 'Oh SNAP!'. I love that weird scene where Chen walks around with Kai like he's already his son in law, that cracks me up! I guess I like them more in theory than in practice. It feels a touch forced, and it needed a bit more time. Point being, the beginnings of the relationship are extremely awkward and strange, but towards the end of the season, it gets good! I just wish we could see more :)

The... love... triangle

Alright, by now, you guys should know how I feel about these things. They suck. They're stupid. I hate them. They're pointless. And this season is... quite possibly the stupidest. So... the whole Garma-Wu-Sako... thing this season is that Wu wrote a letter to Misako a long time ago, and Garmadon stole it, and then... Misako *groan* used it to determine which of them she was going to marry... okay. Yeah, Garmadon, that was a crap thing to do. But you know what, he was evil. Wu should have just signed the thing when he wrote it. But also, Misako... WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' GIRL?! Why... would you let a letter... be the final deciding point? I don't get that. And my main problem is that she basically chose her husband based on his writing ability. The thoughts Wu had in the letter obviously directly express what Garmadon wanted to say. In the end, his feelings for her were still the same. The only thing different is that he didn't write it. He's not good with words the way Wu is. But the show treats it like he lied about his feelings, and didn't even like her. Like he was using her for personal gain or manipulation or something. Idk. The whole thing makes no sense. Now, maybe if he did something to make Wu directly look bad or disingenuous THAT would be understandable. But... idk. I don't get it. Misako sucks. Let's move on.

Villians

Chen

Chen is my favorite villain. Hands down. No competition. Any way you slice it. I friggin love the heck out of this dude. And here's why. First off, he's a very comedic villain that still remains extremely threatening, which is an extremely thin line to walk. I mean, think about it. With all the other villains, they were intimidating, and the henchmen provided the humor. Here, I guess you could say they flipped it cuz Clouse is pretty intimidating, but Chen is still crazy scary on his own. And here's how they do it: He's insane. Straight up, he has lost his mind. Nothing he does makes sense, but that's fine, cuz it probably makes total sense to him. You can laugh at the quirky things he does, but also live in fear knowing that he has trap doors installed EVERYWHERE. Why? Cuz he likes them! Is there a better reason than that when you're crazy! That was my problem with people with Pythor. He is so smart, why didn't he ever think that the devourer might eat him too?! There is no explanation. But with Chen, that doesn't matter! He wants to be a snake! Why? Why not?! No flaws in that thinking, right? This is also why I like Ultra Violet so much. She's the only one to rival his position, but because she's more of a side villain, I don't feel that's enough to dethrone him. With insane villains, you never have any idea what they're playing at, if it's smart, or how to counteract, cuz they're just insane. I mean, seriously,

"Chen, the ninja have figured out our plan, what should we do?"

"COOL! Let's tell EVERYONE our plan!"

And it works! I love his voice. Just the way he says things makes me so happy! He's having so much fun, and I have fun with him! 10/10 villain. Great work.

Clouse

I can't get past the voice. It sounds so over the top evil and... it's kinda annoying for me? He has a decent backstory and such, but whenever he's on screen I always find myself wishing it was Chen. He just sucks the fun out of everything and leaves nothing there, so most of his interactions aren't particularly interesting. I don't know. Never really thought much of him.

Humor

Needless to say everything with Chen works! Everything with the EMs works. Jay's whole Positive Thinking streak is amazing! There's not a lot that falls flat on its face. It's really pretty fantastic.

Favorite joke: too many to count. If I had to pick one...

Chen's: the reds, the purples, the super dark purples!

Drama

This season has some damn good drama. It has my personal most sad moment in all of Ninjago. I'm of course talking about Garmadon's death... JK! XD I WAS LAUGHING ALL THE WAY THROUGH THAT SEQUENCE! But we’ll get to that later. Okay. But for real, my personal most heartbreaking moment is when we find out Pixal is scrapped (of course it's Pixal related) but seriously, watching this for the first time, it broke my heart hardcore. I audibly gasped. They have these conversations, and she realizes he doesn't remember her, and it hurts her because they were comPATABLE GOSH DANG IT! And then he starts remembering, and she knows she can't go with him, so she lies to him to give him the motivation to make it out, and then the reveal, and Zane's heart breaks, and your heart breaks. This whole scenario reminds me of my own writing, it has all these things I enjoy using. Distinctions between fantasy and reality, characters lying to each other to protect them, and an ending realization of total and complete emptiness. Of course, Pixal is added into his head, and all is fine and dandy. It works for this season but serves her worse in future seasons. Regardless, that moment when Pixal says 'scrapped' is the most depressing thing I've ever seen. All of the Zane drama this season works really well. Zane having an identity crisis is something I didn't think the show would handle. When Zane says he's just a clone if himself I was like 'oh, dang! They went there!'. It's almost like he's comparing himself to Cryptor, and it's some heavy stuff. Everything this season is shrouded in mystery. I love that. For the first half of the season or so, I really like the tournament stuff. But as we get Cole, and especially Jay in the noodle factory, that plotline gets much more interesting. I don't get into the Nya and Lloyd and Garmadon stuff that much. The stuff with Kai is okay. But overall, there's some good stuff.

Climax

Okay, so... I... I mean I like the build up. The thing with all the trucks is really good. Most of it was really pretty good with all the EMs doing stuff the ninja would usually do. But the whole ending thing, with getting mini Pythor involved, and you know. The whole Garmadon death thing. He died an honorable death and all that, but... idk, I can't get past Lloyd's voice. As he reads him off I just couldn't stop giggling! It's so overdramatic, they feel like they need to make Lloyd mad at his dad for whatever reason so he can come back at the last second, and it all feels so forced. And then the ending is super overly cheesy for how serious the show wants to take itself at that moment. Idk. I don't like it. One of my least favorite finales.

Spotlight episode

There are some good ones to choose from this season. Some real good ones. But the one I find myself watching the most is Ninja Roll. This episode doesn't have too high stakes, it doesn't make much sense, it's kind of pointless, but it perfectly encapsulates the reason I watch Ninjago. I don't know exactly why I watch Ninjago. I'm not into the action most of the time. The romance is cute, but not potent enough to warrant watching the show. The humor isn't revolutionary, the characters aren't especially deep. No, the reason I watch Ninjago is cuz it's fun. Ninjago is just a good time. It has just enough of all of those aspects to make for something I love. It makes me smile. With seasons 8, and especially 9, Ninjago has shifted into this darker action based, lore-driven thing, which I thought I would like, and I do, but I think it's lost a bit of that fun factor. In my opinion, Ninjago is it's best when it's self-aware, and doesn't take itself overly seriously. When you don't have to end the season on an ominous dark cliffhanger. I mean really. What is this? Chima? No. I just want to go hang out with the ninja and the gang, whatever it is their doing. This episode takes advantage of every situation a roller derby with the ninja provides. Of course Jay roller skates with his mom. Of course, Kai is incompetent at it. Of course, Chen cheats, of course, it all comes down to Lloyd. Of course, there's freaking buggies that Chen releases! This whole episode makes me smile and laugh and it has a good message. This is what I miss about Ninjago, and that's why it's my spotlight.

Misc

I know everyone always teases Jay about his TV show, but what about Kai and his wrestling career? I just feel like that would come up more often

I completely subscribe to the theory that Pixal was scrapped to fix Zane cuz they beat him up so badly when capturing. I'd kinda like to think Pixal even volunteered herself for it... ONE SHOT IDEA

I have to scratch... my face.

I need a number on the trap door to button ratio on the island

This season has my favorite intro of any season. Mainly cuz the remix is FIRE and I hate the fact that they don't have an extended version that sounds more like the opening itself.

So all together, the word to sum up season 4 is fun. Definitely not technically the best, or the smartest, or the most well done, but it's my favorite because of nostalgia, my inner child, and because it makes me smile. I love this season.

- Maya (Parachutingkitten)

#ninjago #analysis #ninjago season 4 #ninjago ToE #tournament of elements #parachuterants

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mikewrestlngsubmissions-blog · 6 years ago

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15 Predictions for the WWE in the coming year

*15 WWE predictions for 2019

The past few years of WWE consumption has undoubtedly been, for the most part, a painstaking undertaking (no pun intended). But what can we say? We are fans, right? It’s the product we love to hate! Even when we have hit the power button on the clicker out of sheer frustration, it is undeniable that for many of us, wrestling is in our DNA. Whether you have fond memories of sitting with a parent or grandparent who loved it, or you were the kid who ran around the playground giving random students stone cold stunners, and telling someone you didn’t like (or did) to “suck it.” It is the reason we congregate on fan sites, video blogs, dirt sheets and the like. To hate it, to love it, to dissect it like that frog in biology. Picking apart every single outcome and possibility to create an equation that make sense to us.

In my fandom, I find it interesting to speculate, as I am sure many of us do. So the following is my attempt to play spoiler to the masses with a list of 15 predictions for the WWE in 2019: Some predictions are bold takes, and others not so much. Here it goes….

1. Drew McIntyre will finally realize Mr McMahons prediction that he is a future WWE champion.

Perhaps not the boldest prediction, as it certainly seems that even before the absence of Roman, Drew was slowly being put in place to have a major run over the next year. Drews first run in WWE left a lot to be desired. Though, in the past he had shown flashes of the aggression that has made him a main event caliber performer these days, it is much more evident that he is more than capable of holding his own as a main event level heel on the main roster. I smell a championship in his near future.

2. Bray Wyatt will become a top tier face.

Bray Wyatt has (what SHOULD BE) one of the best characters in the entire industry. But something is missing, and nobody knows what the hell it is. Not the writers, not the producers, not even Vince. The place went crazy a couple of years ago when a seemingly hopeless character in Wyatt, realized his potential and became the holder of the WWE’s top prize. But a terrible storyline and horrible execution, quickly de-railed his moment on top.

Though we know that wrestling is character-driven, it seems that Brays character is viewed by officials as more over-the-top than it needs to be. There is no need to go back to the supernatural goings on that left crowds stunned during the unfolding of The Undertaker’s story. Bray is very capable of telling his story without tacky images of bugs on the canvas, and House of Horrors matches. If they let Bray BE Bray, they will BE fine. And I am hoping, as well as speculating, that they will in the coming year.

Oh, and it wouldn’t hurt to have him win matches as well….

3. Lars Sullivan will debut…start hot…and fizzle out, all in the same year.

Now, let me start off by saying, I AM being biased. But, that does not mean I am wrong. I look at Lars and I see a freakish looking individual with hands the size of frying pans, the strength of an ox,…..

and the personality of a paperclip.

And not those $1,500 gold paperclips they are selling online at Tiffany’s.

Also, not the paperclip that used to help you use Microsoft Word

(You know what? This might just be an insult to paperclips…but you get my drift). He is not good. He picks things up and puts them down. Even his finisher “The Freak Accident” is the manifestation of being aggressive AND lazy at the same time. Now, I will probably be proven wrong to spite me and other naysayers because the WWE loves that he is a homegrown talent, and they are desperate to create their own stars. I get it. There is just nothing that Lars Sullivan has done up until this juncture that leads me to believe he will be anything worth not taking a bathroom break for

4. The Women WILL main event Wrestlemania 35

I mean at this point it’s a foregone conclusion right? The WWE has one thing they have NEVER had in their history, and that is almost an embarrassment of riches in the women’s division. You have Charlotte, who has already put herself in the conversation as one of the greatest female superstars of all time. There is the only undefeated NXT champion in history, and current smackdown womens champion in Asuka. You have Ronda Rousey who is a legitimate badass fighter, as well as a figure who can draw in the casual fan based on name alone. Finally you have Becky Lynch who has probably done the best job of any woman that my memory serves in getting white hot in an organic fashion. I don’t care if it is two of them, three of them, or all four of them. There is no better story going on this company than the one being told by the Women right now. They are the link between both of the main brands, and have managed to make things even remotely interesting. The main event scene in the womens division is the standard bearer for the entire roster right now. And if they are not the Mania main event, they have been robbed of history

5. Matt Riddle will be the next face of NXT

NXT always seems to have guys who play roles for every generation of NXT. Gone are the days of Tyler Breeze and Tye Dilinger playing the loveable gate-keeping losers that Full Sail loved. No, that role is now reserved for one, Kassius Ohno. And on the flip side, you have guys who join NXT and ya just kinda …KNOW. You KNOW they are there to be champions and carry NXT into the next wave or phase of the brand. With Aleister Black more than likely to be called up any minute once his feud with the (former?) DIY members is done, NXT will undoubtedly be looking for a new face to usher it through 2019, and into 2020. Well, look no further than your resident King of Bros! It isn’t rocket science to see that everybody loves a flip flop wearing board short rocking blonde weed-head, with a theme song that makes you want to dust off your PS2, load up San Andreas and bust a cap in some mark ass busters! (I digress)

This is far from a bold prediction, but it appears Riddle is going to be the man that holds the gold in the coming year.

6. Andrade Cien Almas will win the MITB briefcase

I know I know…You really want me to explain this right? Like what could possibly make me think that Andrade would be the money in the bank holder? Well fear not, for I have an explanation! And that is…that…I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY think that it’s going to happen!

That’s it. Nothing more to see here people!

Seriously though, it would just look good to have him carrying it around with Zelina. And I correctly predicted the two winners last year, so I’m trusting my gut here.

7. The Undisputed Era will be the next big faction

Teams coming out of NXT have gottn really bad deals on the main roster. However, I don’t see that happening for Undisputed Era. There is too much talent and too much personality and chemistry between the four of them, to allow it to go to waste. I predict they will be the greatest faction to make the jump to the main roster out of NXT.

8. Ember Moon will be Smackdown womens champion

Yes, I know she Is a RAW superstar, but with the new announcement that the McMahon family is essentially taking over both brands from….well….themselves? It would stand to reason that the brand split rules will not be as strict as they have been the past few years. The way that rivalries are playing out in the division we COULD see a scenario where Ember wins the Rumble and challenges the Empress of Tomorrow in a continuance of their rivalry from NXT and an effort to finally get that monkey off her back!

WOW I just booked that so GOOD!

9. Braun Strowman is going to break things…. except for his streak of losing to Brock Lesnar

Like honestly guys….at this point, Braun beating Brock is just laughable. You would think that Brock SHOULD lose to a guy like Braun. But seemingly, Brocks weakness is guys that are actually smaller than him. It’s like Brock just can’t catch those little suckers! I don’t know if Braun will ever do more than break things and throw people, and beat up property, and people…with other people. But I know that whatever he does, it won’t be at Brocks expense.

10. The Undertaker WILL NOT wrestle at Wrestlemania

Ok, this isn’t a prediction. It is a WISH. I don’t see anyone on this roster who will benefit from beating him or having a match with him at all. Stay home please!

11. Mandy Rose will win the Womens MITB match

She has the 3 B’s on her side

Blonde...Boobs....and Because….

just…….because

12.

Aleister Black will debut as a heel and exercise Finns Demon

Ooooooohhh! Sounds good don’t it? I seriously have no clue what they are actually going to do with Aleister once he hits the main roster. But I think a feud between he and Finn would be great, especially if we could get Black vs the Demon. I know we like to throw people on SDL from NXT in hopes that they are treated better, but I think Aleister would be a much better fit on RAW right now, since they are thirsty for stars.

13.

There will be an NXT versus Main Roster angle in some way shape or form

I am of the idea that the brand split is essentially in the beginning stages of being over. While that may not shape out this year, I do believe that by survivor series, the whole idea of Raw and Smackdown competing just doesn’t hold the same weight. So barring anything unforeseen, such as renaming the ppv, my next best guess would be another NXT angle. Of course, this current group of NXT stars would be overall, a step up from that last angle.

14.

Miz face run will be a total failure

The Miz is not a face! Mike Mizanin may very well be a great guy who communicates with his wife…loves his baby girl….lets his mother in law follow them around on tv…all of thay. But The Miz?? No. He is one of the constants in the WWE. Everyone knows Miz=very good heel. Idk where they are trying to take his character now after all these years, but I don’t wanna go along for this ride. Nope. Bring back old Miz!

And finally….

15.

THE ELITE WILL SIGN WITH WWE

The WWE is DESPERATE! Though the women are thriving right now the men have no such luck. There are many conflicting reports on the deal offered to the Elite, or if there were deals at all. What was rejected..who isn’t ready….blah blah blah. Listen, the bottom line is that if Vince really wants to get them there, they will be there. Kennys IWGP title run hasn’t gone the way one thought it would be after finally defeating Okada. Perhaps the people over in Japan know something we don’t? Plus I don’t believe these rumors about them rejecting wwe deals are simply to be taken at face value. I believe it’s a tactic to get people buzzing but keep them slightly at bay by sprinkling some doubt in there.

Either way, I expect for talks this year to start heating up out of nowhere and for us to see the former Bullet Club members finally make the transition back to the WWE.

And that, my good people, are my predictions for the coming year in the WWE. Feel free to share your opinions on what was discussed in this blog OR give your own predictions!

Until next time…

#WWE RAW NXT SDL

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ambymyself · 3 years ago

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trauma dumping

may 9, 2022

5:47a (prime sad boi hours)

ehhh it’s time to talk about mom. i love my mom! what would i do without my mom. my mom has done a lot for my brother and i so she feels proud of how she raised us, despite our ups and many downs. she provided a lot but there are things that she didn’t provide which kinda ruined me... idk about my brother but he seems to be fine. she wasn’t affectionate at all to us growing up. during my ✨rumination phase✨ these past few months, i have realized that she isn’t the mom i thought she was.

ima just say it up front: along with my stepdad, she was abusive!!! there!!! i said it, and i have to accept it sooner or later! i know she wasn’t abusive intentionally, she is just ignorant i guess, idk. it’s so weird, i can’t think of a happy moment we shared, only the bad ones. the bad memories i have are vivid, and they were pretty traumatic. other than that i feel nothing. before my rumination, i always felt... empty. i had no idea what was wrong with me and i blamed myself for it. i never thought i was abused, it was just the way “love” was expressed growing up. i had no support growing up, the only thing i felt that mattered was my achievements. if i expressed any negative emotion i was never taken seriously or shamed. so my feelings never mattered which led me to grow up not knowing how to deal with emotions and i have to struggle on my own. i don’t even know who i am....

i’m gonna talk about the abuse. we were spanked a lot for acting out. we were scared of belts and cables or whatever she could reach and learned to obey. i talked a little bit about the verbal abuse i had to deal with growing up, being called a girl and all that, whatever. that really sucked. i was teased a lot by my stepdad every single day growing up. it wasn’t harmless teasing either, it was so bad that i wanted to die at such a young age. i was made to feel bad about myself so young for trying to express myself, and my mom rarely had my back. she was very passive. i remember i would cry a lot and they would tell me to stop crying because he was “only teasing.” ....mmm no, i was being bullied right in front of your eyes. this made me grow up with very poor self esteem and social anxiety. i was taught to reject who i was, whoever that was didn’t matter. i was never comforted and told it was okay, i was basically told to shut up and quit being a bitch. for a long time i had no idea why i had to deal with anxiety, it never made sense to me! but now it does, and i feel like a big missing gap in my life has been filled in and i hate what it was filled with.

and then there was alcohol. growing up i thought it was normal for parents to drink so much. i hated when my mom drank because i always felt so abandoned. when i used to watch TV and saw that kids’ parents on the shows i watched never drank, i thought “wow, i wish my mom was like that,” but it was just TV. she was so comfortable leaving my brother and i every single weekend to go party for YEARS. she never left us alone at a super young age, though, we had babysitters and cousins. but that didn’t last long..... she started leaving just me, only me, alone at age 6. she taught me how to lock the doors and how to call her, then she was gone to go to the casino or to drink. before i thought it was kinda cool how i grew up so quick, but now that i think about it, it’s really fucked up. they would always come home drunk with a bunch of other people, and i had to hide in my room the whole time. i never felt safe because it wasn’t just a normal friends getting together to have a good time. it was a rez party where everyone got so fucked up that they started fighting each other. i witnessed so many drunk fights in my kitchen from such a young age. i remember one time i was alone, a stranger got inside my house. i realized years later that it was a lot scarier than what i thought. he was refusing to leave and looking me up and down saying stuff like “you’re a really nice looking kid” and me just wanting that man to get out of my house (he eventually did). i feel so bad for young me

of course when alcohol and toxic parents are mixed, you get domestic violence. that was a big thing going on in our household that no one ever talked about. everyone in my whole family tried to not talk about it around me and my brother because they thought we didn’t know, but we knew. we saw it first hand many times, and what were we supposed to do? she made it clear to us that if we told someone, we would get taken away. we didn’t want that, so we had to deal with it with no support. i remember my mom coming home with a bloody face a lot, i would ask her who did it and she wouldn’t say who. it was obvious to me who did it, and she still stayed with him, and kept us all in the same house together. even to this day he still lays his hands on my mom. my brother and i stayed quiet whenever these things happened because who knows what would have happened to us if we tried to do something.... then one night my brother tried.

i was only 15, my brother and i were the only ones home because they were out drinking (classic). we were doing our own things, he was playing games in the living room and i was on my pc playing games with my friends. i remember i was having a good night, i was having fun. then around 2am i heard shouting coming from outside my window. i muted myself in the call and went to the back porch to check if it was coming from my neighbor’s house, but it was actually my house. my mom and stepdad were quarreling with my brother trying to intervene. i immediately ran to the side of the house where this was taking place with no shoes on to help. i don’t remember how, but it switched from my stepdad fighting my mom to him fighting my brother. it all escaladed so fast, my feet were getting cut up from the rocks and stuff from the ground, my brother being guarded by my mom while my stepdad was trying to throw punches. there was no way i could help, i couldn’t fight, so i did what i had to do. i called whoever was up to come help!!! i called my auntie, my uncle, and my big oldest cousin. thankfully my cousin was up and answered, so i told him my brother and i were in danger and he needed to get over ASAP. it was so scary, and smart me thought to record this. my cousin literally arrived in seconds after i called and he saw what was happening and immediately jumped into the action. all i remember next was him punching my stepdad and TOSSING my him to the ground and kicking him, and then he grabbed my brother and got in his truck. my brother was crying and i ran in to go get my shoes but when i got back out, they had already left.

i stayed inside and went in my room, and my mom and stepdad came in. this is the part where it gets REALLY REALLY sad. my mom was sobbing while stepdad’s face was all bloody. she was apologizing to him, saying he didn’t deserve that, basically babying the hell out of him. there was no attempt to see if i was ok or my brother, only he mattered. he was literally fighting her kids and her first priority was him, not her own blood. (still the same today 😔) i didn’t feel bad at all about his pitiful ass face. then i heard her begging him to stop, so i looked into their room and i saw that he was frantically trying to open the safe... the safe that had his guns. i knew right there that he was going to try to kill my cousin (or someone idk!!), so i ran outside into the woods. it was just me and my dogs sitting out in the woods at 2am. while i was out there, everything just hit me at once and i finally started crying. why didn’t she care for my brother and i? why were we even put in this situation? i can never stop thinking about this night, it haunts me to this day. ever since then, my relationship with my mom has been ruined. i don’t see her the same way i used to, i always feel some sort of resentment now.

he eventually left without his guns, i heard his truck blaze out of the yard and i assumed my mom was still home. i waited a while to go back, until i heard my uncle calling and i told him what happened. he came over despite it being 3am at this point and i tried to tell him what happened but i cried, so i showed him the video i managed to record. i didn’t get any visual of the fight but it captured the audio, and he heard what was being said to my brother. while he was listening, he asked my mom in the most powerful tone “do you hear what he is saying to your son?” i can tell he was hurt for us, what my brother had to go through with me witnessing it all happen in front of me. all my mom could say was “i know, brother.” in a defeated kind of way, almost like she didn’t want anyone to know. i don’t remember what happened after that and when my uncle left. all i know is my mom went to bed and i was left in my room alone, returning to my pc to tell my friends i was getting off for the night. i was alone to process everything, i couldn’t sleep. then at around 10am my mom woke up and forced me to delete that video 😭. after everything, after our lives being in danger, she forced us to be quiet and never talk about it again.

she never apologized to us. she was mad at my cousin, but i could tell she was really mad at my brother and i. somehow, it was our fault everything happened. we got no support from her. my brother actually moved out for a while after this, he stayed with my grandma. it was just me, my mom and the darkest energy i have ever felt living in this house. it was like a demon watching over me telling me to be quiet. my stepdad returned a week later not saying anything. i had to go back to school a few days after this happened, and i was so numb. i couldn’t look up, i couldn’t feel any emotion and i saw no future. i remember wishing a teacher or someone would notice, but no one ever notices the quiet kid. i was left to fight this battle on my own. no one checked up on me. that’s how it’s always been.

i realized i never felt the love i thought i received growing up. it was actually hurt. i grew up being hurt. no hugs, no encouragement, nothing. the lack of affection and literal abuse has caused me to grow up as a broken person. i have finally gotten to the root of all my problems. because of them, i grew up not knowing how to express myself, how to love, and how to....function. yet somehow, she has no idea how bad it actually is. she thinks she did a good job raising me. i’m surprised i never off’ed myself considering everything. (came close to it a few times but i’m good now😶) i must have some sort of courage in me because if not i probably wouldn’t have kept on dealing with all that surviving.

all i can think about now is how when i’m a parent, i’m gonna do a much better job than they did. i’m going to be there for them, be there for my younger self. i want to be the support i needed.

---

PS i never ever asked my brother how he felt after that night. i kinda want to but i feel like he would have forced that memory out of his mind or get mad at me for trying to bring it up. i want him to know that it still affects me to this day. i want everyone to know what happened.

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becumsh · 7 years ago

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miss sherlock 1x01

No comments, Love it. A cute copycat of Sherlock BBC, love the characters, love the twists and like the whole thing warms my cheap queer korean heart.

p.s. don’t get criticism for Sherlock and misogyny, like, come on. (the episode with the coat, I think). Aren’t girls allowed to bitch about fashion? I bitch about fashion and make-up from time to time, let’s be real.

I mean, the detective and crime side of things was a bit naive and HBO blurred bloody things that are common for Japanese anime/crime drama stuff, which is meh, but I can live with it.

Nods to canon and some iconic Sherlock BBC moments, aahhhh, as an old Sherlockian chap, I approve. The Devil’s Foot was funny and unexpected, like, WhY. Also the killer seemed better than the cabbie, at least the motive wasn’t so meh and boring, so I liked her better.

Mrs Hudson? LOVED HER. Literally takes no shit from Sherlock, love love love her, actually all the supporting characters are lovely. a bit comical and exaggerated but it’s expected from asian tv show, tbh. Such idiosyncrasies have their charms

Also the ‘Wato-san’ line, like... The integration of Western name to Japanese realities - spot on 10/10, the pun was 1000000%intended

I surely forgot everything else because i was screaming and swooning, but I give it a solid 8/10 plus a bonus point for Asian set up because finally I can have a Sherlock Holmes role figure that resembles me a bit and can shamelessly rip off Sherlock’s style because it’s BANGING. I mean, she has 2 inches over me and my face is rounder than Jenna Coleman’s but still. you get me.

Love the show though. Idk, for me it’s hard to hate a Holmes adaptation, however shitty and horrible it may be. And Miss Sherlock is far, far away from that. Not perfect, typiclly Asian-cinematographed (cinematography, post production and such), which is just not my cup of tea, but still, cute, adorable, gritty if not for those pesky americans at hbo, fresh. Love it so far. Love it. Can’t understand anyone complaining. And don’t really care, personally I love it, I think it was lovely done.

Also I’m very gay for women in this show. Don’t understand heterosexual women when Yuko Takeuchi exists. And Doona Bae. And Bingbing Fan. And, like, generally women. But I digress. Anyway, good adaptation, certainly recommend.

Also, for fuck’s sake, I will never be free from Sherlock Holmes fandom. Ever. Those adaptations keep coming. I’m too deep in Sherlock Holmes. I thought it was jut a phase, but I think I was just a stupid naive 13 year old, because 8 years later and still here we are back to square one.

#miss sherlock #miss sherlock spoilers

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perfectionistincrisis · 7 years ago

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Day 83, 84

Didnt post for awhile cause I needed to get some thoughts straight in my head. Idk if i could get them totally straight and i dont even know whether i will ever be able to get them to but its okay i think. I mean it just comes with the baggage of life and inshaAllah I will deal with it along the way whenever it is in action.

So theres been many thoughts coming in my head but then all of it can be connected and related to each other so its just more like one big massive ball of thoughts. I will try to mention whatever comes in my head for now. But hmppphhhh where do i start *wonders*

Okay so i have 2 start points, ill pick the one which is currently still a thought cause the other one is kind of resolved :3

So this is about this conversation i had with him a year ago, exactly around this time last year. I will not talk about our conversation on the internet :3 but just what it was about so that I can get to what it is in my head

Well we werent really going through a good phase back then and once he told me something about ‘love’ & ‘duty’. Like there are things you do out of love, and there are things which are ‘duty’ but you do not love doing them but have to anyways.

The thing is, it is kind of hard for me to understand the relation between ‘love & duty’. To be honest, i did get what he meant back then, and things were different back then (meaning, we were going out) & if not so much, but you could put what he said into context at least a little.

But now, I just dont understand the connection, nor can i appreciate the difference between these two terms. When i say i dont understand the connection - i mean to say i dont understand it, but i believe they are more related and similar than they are different.

When you love someone, and they mean the world to you, and you put them before yourself. You can do anything for them, to protect them, to make sure they are ok. Their happiness matters to you so much. It is so important for you - because you love them unconditionally. and also because when they are not happy, you are not happy either. So you want the best of the best for them, for their happiness,

“and in turn - for yourself too”

“and in turn - for yourself too” ---> this is why I dont understand this difference. You see when you love someone and you want all of that, you always wish you could do something for them. and you actually do everything “possible for you to do” for them. And when you cant, it kills you and you ‘wish’ theres something you couldve done. Now all these wishes, all these wanting to do something, all these prayers, all these urge, these pain - these are just a package. They come along when you fall in love. And they are there.

Now in other words ^ I think i can simply say - “you feel like its your duty to take care of them, to do whatever you can for them”

Now what is “duty”? Idk what it means front he dictionary point of view, but for me it responsibility - and responsibilities/ duties - i think i can come up with 2 types right now - one that is enforced upon you (you dont like doing, maybe) BUT then there is another one - One that you enforce upon Your. Own. Self. because of your affection for someone/ something. Now i really want to point out that there is no “pressure” here in the second one. You are doing it to yourself, technically you can snap out of it but you actually can not. YOU wont let yourself do that. YOU will bound yourself to care, to love, to worry, to act out - you believe its your responsibility.

AND there is nothing bad in it. In fact i think it is amazing!

Why i am pointing this out is that - this is the only way i seem to appreciate the connection between ‘love and duty’/ love vs responsibilities - I think they are are the same. atleast for ME, they are the same. So i have been trying to look deeply into it, and find out something that ive been missing out to appreciate the difference but every single attempt to do so leads me to this same concept which i just mentioned. and it is more like something being solved even before i sat down to figure it out. it all seems so simple.

now how this plays in my daily life right now is how i always wish i could do something for him. now idk much about him obviously cause we dont communicate. but still wondering if he is okay - and worrying about him, and thinking of him - i dont need to make myself do that cause its there by default - and on top of that this tiny feeling of guilt engraved at the bottom of my heart because im aware that there is only so little or lets say nothing much at all i can do ----- that, i believe is the duty/ responsibility i was talking about. something i brought onto myself and i dont mind it at all. but this is the very same reason why i dont get the difference between love and duty at all. i dont think you have to give someone your word in order to have a responsibility towards them. I believe if you love someone, you automatically feel like its your duty to take care of them.

At least thats how it is for me!

so yeah, theres that. i always feel this way. everyday. I really pray that day comes soon where i can do way more than just sit and worry about him, inshaAllah

Now thats that! like i said all the thoughts are related. So now ill move onto the “fear”. Now about the fear. well

misunderstanding and misinterpretations

misunderstanding and misinterpretations - these are always there. always. even when people ‘communicate’ they indeed fail to communicate well. Now just imagine how ‘cool’ it gets when you dont communicate - not so cool

I mean it scares me - is something giving the wrong? anything i do, or anything i say - is it something he’d like? does it seem not right? i mean i have no intentions of hurting him or doing anything negative but it is only human nature to make assumptions - or to misinterpret something - or to misunderstand - and it is not anyones fault - because although there may be a million reasons why one could get a wrong message - one of the main ones are fear once again or being worried, or caring.

So yeah, theres always this fear at the back of my head, trying not to be irrational. and when things are bugging me, trying to shut up, stay shuttttttt instead of acting out. because, this moment will pass, but something i express just out of current volatile mood could get to him and do i ever want that? nooo

^ so that is one of the reasons why i dont always blog. and also the same reason for this weekend drama!

Okay so this is the other stuff i could start my post with. this is fun loll. so i still am not sure whats up but this is my solved case lol - as in what i figured out myself and think is actually what happened. so i woke up on friday and i saw one of his tweets. it seemed to me like it was the time when someone last checked into some social media. UH WELL. and yeah thats it :) that is what got in to my head. a lot of things at once actually. i guess ill just point a few -

1- someone lucky enough to get that much attention from him that hed tweet something like that. i mean its definitely not me, cause all i could think of was whatsapp and well i have the time thingy hidden there AND ALSO, honestly i never had any real conversation, like a real one where im instantly replying to someone and shit with anyone i think after we stopped talking - basically i cant communicate well with people - i feel like having a normal conversation where i sit with my phone and talk to someone and actually bother to give them instant replies is too much of commitment & no i cant put that much effort for anyone ------ so yeah, that kind of made it clearer that obviously its not me, i dont even go to whatsapp! Bleeeeeh - well yeah later i just think i figured its some other app - idk - or maybe there just is a special new person :)

2- It just started to seem really really disturbing - how the tweet bothered me so much. I mean i have no right to get bothered. Like what am I? I mean we’re definitely not together right now. And we dont talk. And even if we were together just saying, i definitely dont want to be a creepy chic who has a problem with things like these. like, woah hold your brakes. who are you to feel bothered by stuff like these :)

3- And then i realised that i really need to take a BIG BIG step backwards - like Breathe, honey. chill. dont let every little thing get to you. EXPAND your mind, think bigger. i mean im not thirteen anymore and this is not a teen fiction novel where teenage girls get jealous over stuff, and everything bothers them, and blabla shit. Ugh hindi movies and tv series are the same too lool. ---- Wel anyways long story short - i was just - “Training my mind and soul to just let go and think bigger”. I shouldn’t be getting bothered by things like this in his life, thats not my place right now i think!

SO YES THATS IT - UH i finally got to jot down this stuff! Such a relieffff ~

So lets re-cap :3

~ Aha, so turns out im basically always thinking about him, theres guilt wishing i could do something, theres fear hoping i dont screw up in ways im too stupid to even realize, and theres me being a little girl, but one badly in love! ~

Ok bye :)

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eeveelutionsforequality · 8 years ago

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Idk if any of u have seen it, but there's a post going around with 3 fandom laws (which are actually on point), but there is a version that says these are great up to a point b/c romanticism of pedophilia/rape/trauma gives actual predators a place to hide, find community, and hurt minors. Idk why but that post really sets me off. I don't really want to read about those subjects myself, but people can write wtf they want n I know ppl who have been helped by reading/writing that kinda stuff.

My fandom rules are: Tag everything so that people can avoid what they want to avoid, don't put hate in the tags, don't contact creators/actors/youtubers/etc with unsolicited things that may be uncomfortable for them (ie it's fine to put fanfics in the Dan and Phil tag because they use them for videos, but it's not fine to message them and be aggressive about the fact that you think that they're/want them to be together), and that no dumb online thing is worth trying to bully or hurt someone.

If someone is being abusive or a predator, then you need to actually provide proof when you warn people about them in callout posts. Like, when I was in one fandom a few years ago I got pretty popular, I dated a couple of other fandom members, and people accused me of using the fandom and my popularity to get girlfriends, when in reality it just so happened that we shared a mutual interest in something and became close because of it. People decided that there was a power imbalance because I had more followers than them, and it was one of the things that started my anti-SJW phase because I was fed up of the term "power imbalance" being thrown around to describe things that actually had no bearing on the relationship. So callout posts for shit like that (although I don't think they made one about me) really desensitize people, and eventually nobody takes a callout post to mean anything more than "I wanna start beef with this person to get more followers" - which sucks because in a situation where there are lots of young people, you do need some level of moderation and warning for when somebody genuinely is a danger to them.

Here's the thing though, predators are going to be predators, no matter what you write or do. Manipulation can make you trust someone, rely on them, ignore the bad things they do, and it doesn't require you to have romanticized or normalized anything to happen - if anything, being exposed to a lot of that fiction and thus a lot of the criticisms and posts that say "X is fine in fiction but not okay in reality" is going to start making you a lot more aware of those things and quicker to realize "Actually, I shouldn't be being made to feel like this, and I remember a post saying that what they're doing now is actually an abuse tactic". My opinion is that education is always better than censorship, and if you keep people in the dark and keep things more taboo then it actually puts them more at risk because they don't know enough about the topic to see what's really happening. Take drugs, for example (no, don't take drugs, that was poor wording...), if you don't tell someone that the trip on shrooms will exaggerate and feed on whatever mood you're in, and so you need to be in a good mood and a safe place when you take them, people might take them at the wrong time and end up having a horrible trip, getting hurt, or worse. Some people might say "You're encouraging drug use!" but you're not, you're not telling people to take drugs or telling them that it's a good thing to do... you're just aware of the fact that ultimately some people will take drugs and they're better off doing so while informed on the topic.

And people know that drugs are bad, we see it everywhere - same with abuse and rape. If you write a story about drugs, that alone isn't enough to convince someone to change their opinion on drugs. Sure, you'll get people like the Slenderman girls, but one of them had schizophrenia and the other schizotypical (I think that was it, might have been schizoid or something) personality disorder - they were susceptible to influence and ultimately that just pushed the right buttons and nobody was paying enough attention to them and their posts online to realize what they were going through. In general, people's morals are pretty solidified by the time they start reading NSFW stuff, and if they're not then they're not really mature enough to be reading that stuff and their parents should be making more of an effort to keep an eye on them. Fiction can't change your morals, in fact being exposed to stuff you morally oppose usually reinforces that opposition. Sure, over time you can become desensitized to representations of things, but people who binge horror movies would still come back scarred if they went to war, because you aren't desensitized to the reality of the situation, just the romanticized version of it. Like, if you read Fifty Shades and then get abused, you don't feel how she felt in the book, because the book is a romanticization - you're still aware that the reality is not fun and it's scary, and no amount of floral language will ever change how it feels to you.

I love writing horror or taboo things. I feel like the author's job is to evoke a range of emotions in the reader - sure, I could just write a book that only came with positive emotions, but that's boring. I want them to feel sad, disturbed, sick, afraid, angry, amused, relieved... and not just because the happy parts feel better when they mean something amidst the rest, but because we have this vast array of emotions and when we feel them in a real world context then we can't escape them and it's not fun. When we feel them in the context of entertainment, they can disappear immediately if we just close the book or turn off the TV, we're completely safe to explore and embrace them, and it gives us the chance to enjoy even bad thoughts and bad feelings, to explore the darker parts of our mind and primitive or bad urges and desires that have no place in the real world, that we have no intention of ever acting on but that we all have in our brain somewhere. None of us are perfect, we all get enraged and imagine carving out someone's eyes with a screwdriver - doesn't mean we're bad people or we'd ever do it - but locking those thoughts away and being afraid of them gives them more power. I think daydreams and stories and stuff just kind of let us get things out, and they can reach boiling point and then gradually cool down, cooling us with them and putting our dumb problems or weird fantasies in perspective.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Like I said, just tag everything and be a nice person, it really sucks that people want to police fiction and hamper creativity.

~ Vape

#Mod Vaporeon

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