#Move If
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“The Driver” by Jordan Bolton
My first book ‘Blue Sky Through the Window of a Moving Car’ is out now! Order it here - https://smarturl.it/BlueSky
#jordan bolton#art#scenes from imagined films#illustration#comic#graphic design#comix#jordanbolton#poetry#comics#blue sky through the window of a moving car#graphic novel#short story#artistsontumblr
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"Imagine still posting fanart a whole year after the game came out" brother what are you talking about
#the fandoms seem ti be moving on so fast what is this#im staying here for a while but what the hell#fandom rant#bg3
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please i love you i'm begging you bring back suspension of disbelief bring back trusting the audience like. i cannot handle any more dialogue that sounds like a legal document. "hello, i am here to talk to you about the incident from a few minutes ago, because i feel you might be unwell, and i am invested in your personal wellbeing." "thank you, i am unwell because the incident was hurtful to me due to my childhood, which was bad." I CANT!!!!
do you know how many people are mad that authors use "growled" as a word for "said"? it's just poetics! they do not literally mean "growled," it's just a common replacement for "said with force but in a low tone." it's normal! do you hear me!! help me i love you please let me out of here!!!
#i am so sick of writers having to anticipate the most boring#bad-faith readings of their work. i am like - if you use cheese as a currency#okay! as long as the world makes sense to me: cool. cheese tax. moving on.#my job as the reader is to suspend my disbelief and say okay! i am so sick of like#fanfiction authors having to write dissertations#because they had an interesting idea they'd like to try out!!!#just write it! if it doesn't make sense that's someone else's problem!!!#PS OP is autistic. yes sometimes i take things literally at first glance. then i think about it lol#this is so clearly not about accessibility etc. it's about like. girl even i an autistic person#am able to understand ''they probably didn't mean his eyes darkened LITERALLY''
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not romantic not platonic but a secret third thing [what would happen between earth and the moon if the earth stopped spinning as illustrated by xkcd randall munroe]
#'your moon is here' things that make me explode like a supernova#UGHHHHHHH what if i was perpetually in your orbit. influencing the tides. protecting you from asteroids. and slowly drifting further away.#then you stopped moving and i was only pulse to your dead heart. orbiting you. right where ive been left. and so you started turning again.#ria.txt#personal#space opera au#(<- not about what you think is about)#hiiii this is gaining traction so glad we're all going insane :D your moon is here is SO fucked up. so good.#xkcd#randall munroe#space#moon#anyways xkcd comics are so good. entertaining witty and informative. check em out!#ok this is about false and ren from hermitcraft#falseren
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People are so stupid about snakes. If there's a little black racer chilling outside just leave it alone, you don't have to kill it, it's probably dealing with all your pests for you, jesus christ
#anyway I'm sad#I even offered to move it myself yesterday and was told they couldn't find him#and then this morning apparently they did find him and just killed him immediately#it's just a little snake! he was outside!#they aren't venomous!
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✦ Pebble ✦
#obliterate your significant other with this one simple move#pet rock acquired#own art#own characters#CanisAlbus#art#artists on tumblr#Vasco#Machete#anthro#scenthound#sighthound#dogs#canine#animals#modern au#actually I was just really itching to draw some hands#a lot of the time my pieces are physically so small I can't quite fit in as much detail as I'd like#paw pads are usually the first to go#which is a terrible shame
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image i am in love with
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cashier: ok that'll be $20
me (visibly sweating): ah, yes, of course! a perfectly reasonable price for a grilled cheese and a small smoothie! that was exactly the price i expected you to say when i ordered a single grilled cheese and a smoothie and my vision is NOT getting blurry as we speak! i am a perfectly normal temperature and my speech patterns are natural and even because this is the countenance of an individual who expected to pay 20 american dollars for a single grilled cheese and a smoothie!
cashier: where's all that blood coming from
#this is my fault moving to la#if anyone tells me to just bring food from home and stop eating out i KNOW#i'm BAD ABOUT THAT but i'm TRYING
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moved 😭
bonus panels on my patreon 💌
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GET ROTATED
#he's driving me insane#so I rotated him#my art#ignore that my signature moves for some reason#animation#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#the book of bill#stanford pines#art
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Whoever conceived and animated this moment, I hope they're doing well and thriving. This is S-rank romance stuff here.
#the ship overall is C to A tier#but it's things like THIS that push it up toward the A#titan ae#titan a.e.#cale#akima#it just...#starts with them chilling together being comfortable in each other's space#that would be enough that's a point there#then she goes and HANDS HIM THE SANDWICH SHE'S EATING#sharing their food#that's another one#and she does it because his hands are busy so he can't feed himself#so that's a third point#and she does it WITHOUT LOOKING AT HIM which is a FOURTH point#and he bites into it without request or invitation so that's a FIFTH point#and then he TAKES THE WHOLE SANDWICH AND GULPS IT DOWN LIKE A LIZARD#which is a SIXTH point#and jumps it up to SEVEN because she pulls her fingers free and finally looks at him and yells at him#IT'S A SEVEN-POINT ROMANCE COMBO#do you know how utterly rare those are?#those are generally earned through KISS scenes where the hands move and the heads touch and maybe there's a spin#they achieved a seven-point romance combo by SHARING A SANDWICH#fixing machines and sharing lunch URRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHH
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tumblr glitched out somehow but idc because this is way better than the original poll
#atlas entry#I was about to post the poll and then I turned off my screen and put my phone in my pocket#I had to move some of the options around so I copied them. I guess tumblr decided to paste that in all the options lol
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i love having adult horse girl friends. I’ll send them a 100x100px crunchy ass jpeg of a random brown horse and be like “thought of u🐴” and I can literally feel their sims relationship bar fill up in real time
#bedtime methinks#dis.txt#never met this many horse girls before moving to the american south#what a treat
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"hey why are all the barrier garments like linen shirts or chemises or combinations going away?"
"oh we have more washable fabrics now! you don't need to worry about sweat reaching your outer clothing when you can just chuck it in the washing machine!"
"cool!"
[100 years later]
"so uh all of those new washable fabrics are leaching microplastics into our water, and the constant machine-washing wears garments out faster. they're also not really sturdy enough to be mended, so we keep having to throw them out and now the planet is covered in plastic fabric waste that will never break down. also it turns out that the new washable fabrics hold odor-causing bacteria VERY well. so could we get those barrier garments back please?"
"sorry babe linen now costs $100000/yard and since it's been so long without them, nobody knows how to adapt barrier garments to the current styles anyway"
"..."
"maybe try this new $50 undershirt made of Special Sweat-Wicking Plastic Fabric! :) :) :)"
#fashion#clothing#modern clothing is NOT practical. it may seem like it on the surface but we've moved so far from#actual practicality that if you take one step out of the system it breaks down#and we need to change the entire system for our own health and the good of the planet#I'm not saying everyone has to dress full historical stylistically! but. we need to bring back some TECHNOLOGIES our ancestors used
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