#More or less 20 years - I remember how old I was when I read The Hobbit for the first time and I remember that it was autumn

[caenith]

Uh, guys, guess who is seeing The Lord of the Rings Musical in less than a week (Tolkien-themed tour in Oxford with fandom friends included!) on her 20th anniversary of discovering Middle Earth?

[gowns]

Why Kids Aren't Falling in Love With Reading - It's Not Just Screens

A shrinking number of kids are reading widely and voraciously for fun.

The ubiquity and allure of screens surely play a large part in this—most American children have smartphones by the age of 11—as does learning loss during the pandemic. But this isn’t the whole story. A survey just before the pandemic by the National Assessment of Educational Progress showed that the percentages of 9- and 13-year-olds who said they read daily for fun had dropped by double digits since 1984. I recently spoke with educators and librarians about this trend, and they gave many explanations, but one of the most compelling—and depressing—is rooted in how our education system teaches kids to relate to books.

What I remember most about reading in childhood was falling in love with characters and stories; I adored Judy Blume’s Margaret and Beverly Cleary’s Ralph S. Mouse. In New York, where I was in public elementary school in the early ’80s, we did have state assessments that tested reading level and comprehension, but the focus was on reading as many books as possible and engaging emotionally with them as a way to develop the requisite skills. Now the focus on reading analytically seems to be squashing that organic enjoyment. Critical reading is an important skill, especially for a generation bombarded with information, much of it unreliable or deceptive. But this hyperfocus on analysis comes at a steep price: The love of books and storytelling is being lost.

This disregard for story starts as early as elementary school. Take this requirement from the third-grade English-language-arts Common Core standard, used widely across the U.S.: “Determine the meaning of words and phrases as they are used in a text, distinguishing literal from nonliteral language.” There is a fun, easy way to introduce this concept: reading Peggy Parish’s classic, Amelia Bedelia, in which the eponymous maid follows commands such as “Draw the drapes when the sun comes in” by drawing a picture of the curtains. But here’s how one educator experienced in writing Common Core–aligned curricula proposes this be taught: First, teachers introduce the concepts of nonliteral and figurative language. Then, kids read a single paragraph from Amelia Bedelia and answer written questions.

For anyone who knows children, this is the opposite of engaging: The best way to present an abstract idea to kids is by hooking them on a story. “Nonliteral language” becomes a whole lot more interesting and comprehensible, especially to an 8-year-old, when they’ve gotten to laugh at Amelia’s antics first. The process of meeting a character and following them through a series of conflicts is the fun part of reading. Jumping into a paragraph in the middle of a book is about as appealing for most kids as cleaning their room.

But as several educators explained to me, the advent of accountability laws and policies, starting with No Child Left Behind in 2001, and accompanying high-stakes assessments based on standards, be they Common Core or similar state alternatives, has put enormous pressure on instructors to teach to these tests at the expense of best practices. Jennifer LaGarde, who has more than 20 years of experience as a public-school teacher and librarian, described how one such practice—the class read-aloud—invariably resulted in kids asking her for comparable titles. But read-alouds are now imperiled by the need to make sure that kids have mastered all the standards that await them in evaluation, an even more daunting task since the start of the pandemic. “There’s a whole generation of kids who associate reading with assessment now,” LaGarde said.

By middle school, not only is there even less time for activities such as class read-alouds, but instruction also continues to center heavily on passage analysis, said LaGarde, who taught that age group. A friend recently told me that her child’s middle-school teacher had introduced To Kill a Mockingbird to the class, explaining that they would read it over a number of months—and might not have time to finish it. “How can they not get to the end of To Kill a Mockingbird?” she wondered. I’m right there with her. You can’t teach kids to love reading if you don’t even prioritize making it to a book’s end. The reward comes from the emotional payoff of the story’s climax; kids miss out on this essential feeling if they don’t reach Atticus Finch’s powerful defense of Tom Robinson in the courtroom or never get to solve the mystery of Boo Radley.

... Young people should experience the intrinsic pleasure of taking a narrative journey, making an emotional connection with a character (including ones different from themselves), and wondering what will happen next—then finding out. This is the spell that reading casts. And, like with any magician’s trick, picking a story apart and learning how it’s done before you have experienced its wonder risks destroying the magic.

-- article by katherine marsh, the atlantic (12 foot link, no paywall)

[bigification]

Prom King

"We want to welcome you back to Fairway High for your ten year reunion. Come catch up with some old friends and share all the amazing adventures you've had since you graduated! And stick around for a special speech from our Prom King and Queen."

Dan shuddered as he read the email. He had completely forgotten about the stupid reunion. It's funny, he thought, he used to imagine how he would show up to the reunion in a sports car with a perfect bod and high end clothes hugging his muscles. But that was back when he was the most popular football player in his town. Parents adored him, popular teens idoled him, and nerds feared him. Things have changed a lot for Dan since then.

He stared at his half naked body, ravaged by the bad habits of an ex jock. His appetite stayed after he graduated high school, but the exercise didn't last long. He went off to study business in college, as any high school jock did. His time spent at football practice turned to frat parties and junk food, which quickly showed on his waistline. It really put a dent in his once untouched ego, especially once people nicknamed him as 'freshman' fifty. It wasn't quite fifty pounds, at least not in his first year. It sure was well over that by the time he graduated though. And in that time, his clean shaven body had been buried in thick dark hair from head to toe. Although he didn't entirely mind the more mature look, especially once his beard grew in, it complemented his growing gut. Though Dan took another sizable cut to his ego when he started to go bald at the ripe age of 20. Comb overs only lasted him so long, so he started shaving it when he was in his senior year.

He always said it built character, which to be fair, he was far less awful after graduating college than he was in high school. The email only made him remember how awful he was back then. He was the typical jock with his possy of suck up football players who had no personality and the most popular girls. He would torment anyone who was even slightly chubby, or even just smart, they were all beneath him in his mind. How were people gonna react when he shows up to the reunion looking 9 months pregnant and about to burst. It horrified him at the thought of them treating him how he treated them.

Then the horrifying thought hit him, "I'm the Prom King!" He shouted out loud at him in the mirror. Not only would he have to show his face, and gut, he would have to stand on stage in front of his entire graduating year and say a speech about being Prom King. He would be a laughing stock.

"I have to do something about this." He thought.

The reunion was still two weeks away, he could workout, or diet, or maybe buy some clothes that hide his fat. He did a frantic search online but everything just seemed like a scam. He scrolled through page after page of scam supplement and intense workout regimen until he found something interesting. A witch who lived nearby. A witch who specializes in body modifications. It was drastic, but could be crazy enough to work.

Dan contacted the witch with a request to make him into an absolute jock, the kind of man his high school friends would expect him to be 10 years later.

After a bit of back and forth, an appointment was set, and Dan went to bed happy.

The day of the appointment came in a flash. Dan threw on his classic base ball cap to cover his balding head, and dressed in some gym clothes that he thought would look sick on his new hunky body. He excitedly hopped in his car and drove down to the witches house. To his surprise, it was just a regular apartment in a regular apartment building. He was expecting some evil looking house, but seemed less intimidating anyway. He knocked on the door, and he was met with yet another surprise. A petite and nice looking woman wearing all black opened the door.

"Come in darling." Her voice was enchanting. "Sit." She continued in a soft but commanding tone.

Dan sat in a small chair in front of an antique looking table. The raggedy wooden chair creaked under his weight as the witch sat across from him.

"So... You say you want a strong, manly, and attractive appearance?" She asked.

"Yeah."

"Well for what it's worth, you're much more attractive than you used to be." A cold breeze blew past Dan as she spoke.

"Oh... Thank you." His cheeks reddened at the comment.

"I do have to warn you, there are some... dangers to this spell." Her tone darkens.

Dan just raised his eyebrows.

"There are people who feed off of a witch's magic. Now I know how to avoid them, but I will be imbuing this magic into you. So you may have a target on your back from people trying to steal your magic."

"I'm sure I'll be fine."

"Just don't draw too much attention to yourself." The witch warned. "Anyway. I'll get on with it."

She dipped her hands in a small bowl that was laid on the table. "Stand up." She commanded, and Dan followed. She walked around to Dan's side of the table, fingers wet from whatever was in the bowl. She pressed her fingers into his forehead, and it felt like all the tension in his body vanished in a split second. In fact, all feeling seemed to vanish in Dan's body, leaving him stood exactly still. Something about being frozen should have scared him, but he felt a strange sense of calm in the moment.

The witches fingers traced down Dan's face, through his beard and over his soft man tits. She lifted the finger and firmly pressed it back down into his chest. It was like the air was pushed out of his chest as the fat on his moobs collapsed in on itself, leaving his chest completely flat. She then pulled her finger outward, and his pecs grew as she pulled. The muscle swelled until two juicy pecs pressed hard against his tang top. Dan was shocked, he couldn't believe it actually worked, although he still couldn't move.

The witch then traced her finger down to his gut. She laid the palm of her hand against it and pushed, causing his belly to vanish in a second. And once again, she pulled her hand back to form a defined six pack over his flat stomach. She moved her finger around his side, melting away his love handles and giving him a thin waist.

She then suddenly sped up, as if she hit her stride. Her hands gripped Dan's soft arms, and suddenly definition appeared on his rapidly growing biceps. They grew to the size of melons as his shoulders broadened to match. Good thing he wore a tang top or else his sleeves would be in shreds on the floor. Her hands slid down his forearms, doubling their size in the process, and she held his hands, making them so massive they could completely cover his face.

She then bent down and grabbed his thighs, causing them to thicken to the point that Dan couldn't separate them anymore. She thickened his calves as she moved to his feet, making them burst out of his shoes as they grew to a monstrous size 20. As she stood back up, Dan realized the witch stood at eye level to his pecs when they used to be the same height.

The witch then wrapped her arms around Dan's hulking body and cupped his ass cheeks, making them expand into two thick globes of fat that threatened to rip through his shorts. One hand then came back and gripped Dan's dick, making it grow and thicken until it was a massive 10 inches and hanging down his pant leg.

Finally, her hand lifted up to Dan's face, making a few adjustments to match his body. A thicker beard, a sharper jawline, a slightly bigger head to match his much bigger body, and thick brown hair on his head.

Dan gasped as he regained control of his body. He teetered back and forth as he tried to get used to his new body. His legs felt strong, holding up his immense muscle mass with ease. He even struggled to move his arms around at first because it was difficult to move that amount of mass. His meaty hands took a moment to explore his expansive body; bouncing his pecs and his ass, gripping his cock, and even rubbing through the short brown hair that now covered his head.

"How are ya feeling handsome?" The witch broke the silence.

"Are you kidding me, I feel amazing!" Dan flexed, as if to show off his body like a new toy.

"Well I'm glad you like it, now we should talk abou-" the witch was interrupted as Dan basically ran out the door.

"I'll be fine, thank you!" The sound of his voice got quieter as he shut the door behind him.

On his way home, Dan excitedly stopped by a retail store to grab some clothes that actually fit. He confidently strolled in with his tang top riding up his hairy six pack, and shorts that were clearly too small for him. He picked up a few clothes that were big enough to fit him, but small enough to leave little to the imagination about his physique. The clothes weren't exactly pretty, but nobody would care about the clothes when his hunky body was the one wearing them. He even flirted with the cashier on the way out, making his cheeks flush red.

He swiftly made it home and passed out like he had just had the workout of his life.

He woke up the next morning, feeling like he was still in a dream. He shot out of bed as if he'd had three cups of coffee already. This was how he spent every morning leading up to the reunion. Dan was more productive this week than he had been in years. His looks quickly got him a modest following on Instagram, and even on onlyfans after his followers pestered him enough. He reconnected with a bunch of his old friends from high school, just to build a rapport with them before the reunion. And he spent most nights partying and staying the night at some strangers house. By the time the reunion rolled around, it was as if he was the same person he was in high school. Hot, athletic, cocky as hell, and maybe just a bit nicer than he was back in high school. So much for 'building character'.

Before he knew it, it was time to leave for the reunion. He had been prepping for this all week, there was no way he could mess it up now. Dan was meant to be the Prom King. He wore a snug pair of jeans that hugged his ass perfectly, and a grey shirt that showed off his juicy pecs, and finally threw on the letter jacket he wore when he was Prom King ten years prior.

He pulled up to the reunion in his shitty, half broken down car and parked as far out of the way as possible just so no one could see the piece of shit he drove. He pushed open the door to the venue and walked past the crowd of people as if all eyes were on him, because they were. Everyone who was anyone knew who the Prom King was.

He strolled to the back of the stage, so he could get ready for his speech. He stood alone, in silence for a moment, trying to hype himself up. Even after the amazing week he has had, it was the same insecure fat ex jock under there who was scared that everyone would laugh at him onstage. But his moment of silence was interrupted when loud footsteps approached him from behind.

An older man strolls into the backstage, walking right past Dan as if he wasn't there. Dan grimaced as the man got close, seeing the man's large ball belly hanging out of his shirt, which seemed to have multiple buttons popped off. "What is this pig doing here?" Dan couldn't help but think of the old man. The old man promptly sat down in a chair near Dan, leaning back and pulling the shirt up his gut, as if to show it off.

"Who the fuck are you!?" Dan yelled as he got fed up with the old man's antics.

"Oh, you don't know who I am?" The man said as he continued to adjust himself in the seat.

"Why would I know some loser like you, are you the Prom Queens dad or something." Dan scoffed.

"I thought the witch would have warned you about me." The old man's demeanor became more serious.

Dan felt a jolt of fear run down his spine. How does he know about the witch?

"Oh I bet she did." The man started to laugh. "But all the attention online and the sex and the porn, oh the porn was so good." The man grunted as he rubbed his crotch. "You just couldn't resist being popular!"

Dan only grew more afraid as the man monologued.

"I am going to enjoy this." The old smiled as he got up from the chair.

"Enjoy what?" Dan questioned as he tried to back away, but couldn't. Why couldn't he back away. The old man grew closer and closer, but no matter how much Dan wanted to run, he remained frozen in place. The man placed his finger on Dan's forehead, causing a blue light to escape from his body and enter the man's body.

Dan watched helplessly as the man's arms grew to the size of melons, his biceps bursting through his sleeves. Meanwhile, all Dan could feel was his sleeves becoming looser as his arms deflated. The man's moobs shrunk into a solid pair of pecs as Dan looked down to see his chest swell until he was left with two soft man tits. The man's ball gut got smaller and smaller as fat piled into Dan's stomach, leaving him with a heavy gut that spilled under his shirt. The man's pants grew tighter and tighter as thick muscles filled his thighs and juicy fat perked up his ass. Dan felt weak as his legs became more fat than muscle, he even felt the bulge in his pants shrink as he watched a thick bulge appear in the man's pants.

As if that wasn't enough, Dan watched on in horror as the man's face ages down from 60 down to 30. His wrinkles melted away as Dans became dry and wrinkly, his face thinned out as Dan's became rounder and chubbier, and his hair gained a light brown colour as Dan's thinned out and became white. The man pulled off his shirt to reveal a forest of dark hairs sprouting all over his body as a bushy bread covered his face. Meanwhile Dan can feel his face go cold from the much thinner facial hair.

As the transformation came to an end, the man flexed as he felt the energy course through him.

Dan once again let out a gasp as he regained control of his body, though this time his voice was much deeper and gruffer. Dan panicked as he ran his hands through all of the new rolls of fat on his body. He even stumbled back as he adjusted to the weight of his gut.

"What did you do to me!?" Dan yelled.

"Oh you did this to yourself buddy, y'know how easy it was to find you." The man responded, sounding almost exactly like you used to.

"You made me fat." Dan's voice breaks.

"Oh I did so much more than that, check the camera in your phone old man." The man smiled, as if he was containing his excitement.

Dan dreadfully pulled out his phone and opened the camera app.

Dan shed a tear as he saw the fat old man staring back at him through his phone's camera. His gut was bursting out of his jacket and his hair was nearly as thin as it was before his initial transformation.

"And if you don't mind I'll be taking that." The man grabbed the letter jacket off of Dan and put it on himself.

The man confidently strutted towards the stage, ready to give his speech as Prom King, but Dan wasn't ready to give up that easily. His footsteps were heavy as he followed the man onstage and grabbed his arm.

"You're not gonna take this away from me!" Dan yelled.

This was followed by a moment of silence as the crowd went awkwardly quiet. Everyone's eyes were once again on Dan, but it didn't feel like before.

"Ooohhh, that was embarrassing old man." The old man whispered to Dan before approaching the mic. "I'm sorry everybody, my dad is just a bit jealous that I'm in my glory days and he's not." The man says to the entire venue, then turns to you once again. "Isn't that right, dad? " He said as he pressed his finger into Dan's chest.

Dan froze once again. This time, memories flooded into his brain. Memories of him growing old, never reaching the happiness and popularity he had in high school. He even had a son, and named him Dan jr. after himself of course. Though his son would grow to top him in all of his achievements, including becoming prom King back when he was in high school. Dan Sr. finally decided to swallow his pride and let his son have the spotlight. He slowly waddled off to the side and watched as his son gave his speech as Prom King.

[4mnji]

OPPOSITES ATTRACT ᡣ𐭩 goth!choso x coquette!reader

warnings: nothing to heavy just some kissing n ass touching at the end, choso n reader r like 20, abbreviations and lowercases intended, n word usage once, written with a black women in mind but anyone can read ofc 😚

wc: 628

a/n : hihi guysss im nini and welcome to my debut post. this has been sitting in my notes along with some other stuff i’ve written for the longestttt time and im ready to share them to the world now. i hope yall enjoy these hcs of my bbygirl choso :3

goth!choso who’s been well..emo for as long as he can remember. the nigga was 13 years old dressing like rodrick heffley and listening to heavy metal rock music 😭 like he wasn’t playing bout this lifestyle.

goth!choso who always thought that his future gf would’ve been someone who is just as emo and gothic as he was but boy was he wrong.

goth!choso who couldn’t explain why coquette!reader caught his attention so quickly. he’s never been a fan of the cute pink girly aesthetic, not that he hated it but y’all know he been an emo since he basically came out his momma’s womb, so he always preferred if girls had a similar aesthetic to him. all that didn’t even cross his mind when he laid his eyes on u, how could it when u just looked so pretty n cute ???!

goth!choso who wasn’t even planning to approach u and was just going to head home and lie in his bed while reminiscing abt the cute girl he saw in the cafe. that is until u decided to approach him and compliment his outfit. a cute pink blush creeps up onto his cheeks and he doesn’t even get to thank u bc he so busy admiring how beautiful u are. u give him a gorgeous smile and hand him a little note that says “text me •ᴗ•” with ur number on it. with that beautiful smile still plastered on ur face, u wave ‘bye’ to him and walk away.

goth!choso who gets home that day contemplating with his phone in his hand if he should text u or not. after a good 10 mins of pacing around his room and giving himself some motivational talk, he sends u a message and exits the messaging app almost immediately.

goth!choso who’s kinda surprised when u actually respond to his message in less than 2 minutes. from that point on u n choso hit it off from there.

goth!choso who’s been with coquette!reader for almost a year now and he loves u so so much !! he was always more than happy to give u money so u could buy more of those cute lil bows and accessories that u loved wearing or those pink coquette themed decor items that u loved placing all throughout ur apartment. he adored ur obsession with the coquette lifestyle sm. he thought it was so adorable and loved ur dedication towards it.

goth!choso who has grown accustomed to the color pink and even started wearing n buying more pink clothing just so he could match with u sometimes. u knew ur bf wasn’t a huge fan of pink and u always thought he would stick with his dark aesthetic so it made u extremely happy when u saw him frequently starting to wear pink clothing !

goth!choso who has begged u numerous times to try out the emo/gothic style bc he was really curious to see how u would look in it. eventually u caved in and decided to surprise him and got this outfit and wore it to one of ur date nights with him. he couldn’t get over how good u looked and this just confirmed for him that u would always look good no matter what aesthetic u had !! when he took u back to his apartment, he wouldn’t even let yall get through the door before he picked u up, hands rubbing all up on ur ass while he left long sloppy kisses along ur jawline and neck, attempting to take u to his room without bumping into a wall or a piece of furniture.

goth!choso & coquette!reader who r the exact definition of opposites attract !!

moodboards ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ

[schmergo]

Today I learned a fact that kinda blew my mind, and I'm almost astonished I didn't know this before as someone whose chief interests include zoo animals, the U.S. Presidency, true crime, and D.C. history. What an opener, right? How could those topics possibly combine?

Well, buckle up and get ready to hear how negligent National Zoo leadership potentially could have killed a US President or started a local epidemic. Spoiler alert: They didn't. But only because luck was in their favor.

First, the part that I DID already know. In 2004, Lucy Spelman stepped down as the director of the National Zoo after a spate of controversial zoo incidents, including a string of unfortunate (and often preventable) animal deaths, misleading and missing zoo records, and other signs of negligence. The AZA even "tabled" renewing the National Zoo's accreditation for a year until they made some significant improvements. Spelman was also a vet and some of the cases she was accused of bungling happened at her own hands, not just under her supervision. It was a major disgrace for a zoo that was meant to represent the nation's capital.

I was in elementary school during these fraught years and I remember devouring articles about this in the newspaper, riveted with shock and dismay. Some of the deaths were just bad luck, but others were obviously negligent. The most infamous case was two red pandas killed by rat poison shallowly buried in their enclosures as a slapdash solution to the zoo's pest problem. A young zebra died of starvation and hypothermia after Spelman ordered the zebras' feed be cut in half, an orangutan was euthanized due to a recurrence of cancer that didn't exist (she actually had salmonella), a lion died after being administered over twice the usual amount of anesthetic, and more. I remember the names and details of these animals from when I first read these cases 20 years ago. But the one I'm talking about today is that of Nancy the elephant.

Nancy was a 46-year-old African elephant whose health had been steadily declining for several years. She suffered from a bone infection in her foot that seriously affected her mobility and quality of life. She had lost a lot of weight, she was fatigued, she even lay down at times. Nobody could be blamed for deciding to euthanize the obviously ill animal.

But they could be blamed for what was discovered in the necropsy after she was euthanized. While she did indeed have a diseased foot, the bone infection was only "moderate." Why, then, was she so obviously unwell? Her lungs had been destroyed by the effects of untreated tuberculosis. It was the tuberculosis, not the sore foot, that most contributed to her decline in health.

Here’s the scary part: nobody knows how long she'd had it because she hadn't been tested for tuberculosis, a known concern for zoo elephants, in TWO YEARS. All this despite the fact that it's MANDATORY for all zoo elephants to receive a tuberculosis test once per year-- and in fact, it was a National Zoo staff member who pushed for that reform in the first place. And the elephant was on Prednisone for her foot issues, which zoo staff noted in her records made her more vulnerable to illnesses like TB. In fact, none of the zoo's elephants had been tested recently, which meant any of them, including one who was pregnant, may have had tuberculosis, too.

There are documented cases of humans catching tuberculosis from elephants. Now, Nancy the elephant had bovine tuberculosis, which seems to be less contagious to humans and which elephants haven't so far spread to humans... BUT it has spread to humans from black rhinos, a fairly close relative, so it seems likely that elephants COULD spread it. It can also take a while for TB for incubate (and can also be latent without symptoms), especially for elephants, so the elephants OR keepers who were around Nancy were at serious risk for TB.

NOW HERE IS THE PART THAT I DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT UNTIL TODAY:

Spelman actively tried to COVER UP the situation, potentially putting many more people at risk. The elephant house was closed to zoo guests, but they were only told it was for "renovations." (The actual renovations, incidentally, were to improve ventilation so that illness would be less likely to spread.)

A BBC news crew that came to film the elephants was asked to keep a healthy distance from the elephants for their emotional health and the crew's safety-- the explanation given was that the elephants' group dynamics had been thrown off by Nancy's death. Spelman instructed zoo staff not to mention the TB situation to the BBC crew and, if asked why Nancy died, they were to respond that it was for multiple reasons and that the official test results weren't all back yet.

And here's the most shocking part of all, the part that made me GASP out loud. Spelman still personally gave some special VIP behind-the-scenes tours of the elephant house during the months that the elephant house was closed, a time when the remaining elephant inhabitants could potentially still develop active TB.

One VIP who received an elephant house tour was PRESIDENT BILL CLINTON and five family members!!!!

BILL. CLINTON. THE GOSHDARN PRESIDENT.

While zoo staff says that the tour was deliberately distanced and nobody got close to an elephant, there are photos of Bill Clinton's nephew about a foot away from an elephant's trunk. You know, their nose. The part they can spread disease with. So, uh, definitely in the danger zone there.

Hillary Clinton's brother, Tony Rodham, was on the tour and he said that nobody in the party was warned about TB risk or asked if they had any medical conditions that might (a. make them susceptible to communicable disease, or (b. be contagious to the elephants. This is especially egregious because according to zoo guidelines, all behind-the-scenes tour participants MUST be asked these questions-- not just when there's a very real possibility of a TB outbreak at the zoo.

Fortunately, none of the zoo's other elephants OR keepers ever tested positive for tuberculosis. But it was certainly a close call! And imagine what would have happened if a US President caught TB from a close encounter with an elephant thanks to poorly managed zoo staff.

Presidents meet a lot of people. In fact, this zoo visit happened only 2 weeks before the inauguration of President George W. Bush, which Clinton attended. He very well could have started a TB outbreak there. Heck, TWO US Presidents could have been infected!

Now THAT is something I will be thinking about for a long time!

[joelscruff]

one thing i'm missing (joel miller x reader) PART FIVE

i'm SO appreciative of all the kind words, it all means so much to me. thank you so much for reading & here's my kofi if you'd like to leave a tip. masterlist | ao3 summary: you and joel accidentally end up falling asleep together, and what follows is the beginning of a quiet and tender relationship neither of you saw coming. rating: 18+ explicit (mdni) warnings: (for this chapter) fem!reader, smut, age difference (reader is in her mid 20s and joel in his mid 50s), unprotected p in v sex (very tender & loving), cunnilingus, pet names, soft!joel word count: 5.1k

Pulling yourself out of Joel's arms was probably the most difficult thing you'd ever had to do, but you'd been standing there kissing in the hot spring for at least twenty minutes at that point, smiling at each other between stolen pecks and tender whispers. The way he looked at you now was still the same but somehow less guarded, more open. He didn't try to hide the way his gaze darted to your lips, to your breasts, to your legs and back up again. You felt so safe in his embrace, his fingers trailing up and down your back in a steady motion as he kissed you sweetly. You never wanted the moment to end.

But it had to. Ellie was waiting back at the cabins and it wasn't wise to leave her alone for much longer. You'd obviously checked the entire resort for infected but you'd been caught off guard before; it was always better to be safe than sorry.

“We need to go back,” Joel murmured against your lips, almost like he'd read your mind, and you felt yourself pout.

“I know, but I don't want to.”

He smiled, kissing you again, hands palming your shoulder blades, “I know. I could kiss you for hours,” he groaned playfully against your mouth, “Suddenly I'm sixteen years old again.”

“Cute,” you giggled, “I bet you were adorable.”

“I was a football player,” he teased, “Got all the cheerleaders.”

“Suuure you did.”

He raised his eyebrows, “You think I'm joking? They loved me. Don't I look like a cheerleader magnet?”

You rolled your eyes, “All my cheerleading knowledge comes from Bring it On, did you ever see it?” He shook his head, “It was a movie about cheerleaders, it came out a few years before the outbreak. I remember my sister rented it and let me watch it with her.” You smiled at the memory, it was one of the more concrete things you could remember from before the world had gone to shit.

He groaned again, shutting his eyes, “Please don't remind me how old you are, I just went from sixteen to fifty-six in about five seconds,” you laughed and he shook his head, trying not to smile, “I'm serious, I really do forget that you're...” he trailed off.

“Young?” you finished for him, “I know. I'm sorry. If I could change it I would. But unless we find a time machine out here I think we're stuck the way it is.”

“I just worry,” he was suddenly serious, brow furrowed, “You know, when we tell Ellie...she might think it's weird. I mean, she sees you kind of like an older sister, doesn't she? I don't want her to think I'm being a creep or something. That's half the reason it took me so damn long to...” he gestured between the two of you, “...do this.”

You stared at him for a second and grimaced.

“What?” he asked, raising an eyebrow, “What's that face?”

“Well...um...Ellie actually knows.”

His hands dropped from you like he'd been shocked, “She what?”

--

“The whole time,” he said for about the tenth time as you walked with him down the overgrown path back to the cabins, both of you now fully dressed, “She knew the whole time.”

“I think that's a bit hyperbolic,” you patted him on the shoulder reassuringly, trying to keep up with his fast pace, “She didn't really know anything, and to be fair even I didn't really know what exactly this was between us until about an hour ago, so I mean...”

“I thought she had PTSD or something,” he gritted through his teeth, “I thought she was traumatized.”

“Turns out she's just a matchmaker.”

He rolled his eyes, “Please stop trying to make this funny, it's not funny.”

“Joel, slow down,” you grabbed his arm, “Stop.”

He huffed to himself but stopped in his tracks, spinning around to face you, “What?”

“This is a good thing,” you told him softly, trailing your fingers along his forearm soothingly, “Yes, it's surprising, yes it's kind of annoying that she never said anything, but wouldn't you rather this than the alternative?” your hand found his and squeezed it gently, thumb caressing his knuckles which now felt smoother from the soap and warm water, “She's not traumatized, she's okay.”

You watched his expression soften as you soothed him, slowly nodding at you and closing his eyes when you reached your hand up to stroke his face gently. He smiled at your touch, hand resting tenderly on your wrist as your finger traced the shape of his lips.

"Don't ruin today," you said quietly with a reassuring smile, "You just kissed me in a hot spring, let's focus on that."

He smirked, "Did a lot more than kiss you."

You bit back a laugh and started walking again, shaking your head, "You really are sixteen at heart, aren't you?"

--

Ellie had already finished her lunch by the time you both got back to the cabins. Admittedly, you would have gotten there sooner if Joel hadn't kept stopping every so often to admire you, appraise you, thumb your cheekbone and kiss you softly in the middle of the path. You weren't complaining though. You'd been waiting to see this side of Joel for so long, knew it was there somewhere beneath the surface just waiting to have a reason to come out. Turns out, that reason was you.

"How was the bath, Joel?" Ellie asked from her place at one of the picnic tables, journal open in front of her.

"Very... informative," he replied, voice a bit stiff, making direct eye contact with her.

She stared back at him in confusion, "Well that's ominous."

"I told him," you explained quietly beside him, and you watched guiltily as her jaw dropped.

"What the fuck?" she slammed her journal shut and extricated herself from the picnic table, then stomped over to you with a hellish glint in her eye, "Why would you do that?!"

"Ellie, I'm-"

"Look, I'm sorry if I crossed a line but you're the one who asked," she interrupted, face going redder and redder with every word, "I was gonna keep it to myself, I told you it was none of your business."

Your brow furrowed in response, confusion settling on your face. Joel, who obviously hadn't been there for the conversation, immediately began to defend you.

"She did the right thing," he said firmly, although his voice had become a bit more tender at Ellie's sudden surge of emotion, "I have a right to know."

"Neither of you have a right to know anything," Ellie growled, clutching her journal to her chest and backing away from the both of you, "Jesus, I may have been born after the outbreak but I thought this kinda shit was supposed to be private until the person themselves actually wants to talk about it."

Joel froze then, making a similar puzzled face as you, "Wait, what?"

You slowly began to put your hand up, lips parting, "Hold on, I think we're talking about two different things here."

Ellie's angry expression faltered, looking from Joel to you and back again in total bewilderment. She held her journal even tighter against herself and realization suddenly doused you like a bucket of cold water.

"Oh my god, Ellie, no. I didn't tell him about that," you gestured to her journal, shaking your head frantically, "I told him that you knew about us."

She froze, lips forming a small "o" as her grip loosened on her journal. The anger was gone but her skin had somehow gone even redder, "Oh."

"I'm confused," Joel said, eyebrows raised.

"And you're gonna stay that way, sorry," you winced, patting his arm carefully and trying not to feel too bad when he frowned at you, "Ellie and I, we talked about, uh, two completely different things earlier. She thought you were mad at her for...something else."

"For what?" Joel suddenly looked concerned, peering over at her again, "What else should I be mad about?"

"You actually wouldn't be mad about the other thing," you said quietly, eyeing Ellie again. Her eyes had begun to fill with tears and she was still standing there quite dejectedly, "It's just personal, girl stuff. Nothing to worry about."

"He might get mad," she suddenly said, biting on her lip and giving you a worried look, "He's old."

"Hey-" Joel began but you put your hand up again to stop him, shaking your head.

"He would never be mad about that, Ellie. Trust me," you took a few steps toward her and opened your arms a bit, "I'm not mad, am I?"

She nodded slowly, the tears fading before they'd had a chance to spill over, "That's true."

You closed the distance between the two of you and hugged her tenderly. It was the first time you'd actually shown her any physical affection; you'd been too scared to cross her boundaries before, worried it would trigger something deep within her about David. Obviously, those worries no longer existed.

She buried her face in your jacket, sniffling a bit, "This is so embarrassing," she whispered, voice muffled.

"Hey, it's okay," you whispered back, quiet enough so only she could hear you, "What you're feeling is totally normal, believe me," you pulled back a bit to look at her again, hand coming up to cup her face, "I only yelled earlier because you took me by surprise, you know that right?"

"I know," she nodded, "And I know I shouldn't have been looking at you. It's just...it's not like I'm ever gonna see another pair of boobs out here in the middle of nowhere. I just wanted to see what all the fuss was about."

You laughed, rolling your eyes, "I get it, but yeah, no more looking at me like that, okay?" you scrunched up your nose, "It's not appropriate, I'm sorry. Not because I'm a girl but because I'm an adult. But after all this is over I'm sure you'll find a girl who will actually let you look at her boobs."

Her skin, which had faded back to a gentle pink as you'd spoke, suddenly surged a bright red again, and she began to pull away from your hug, "Okay, no more boob talk please," she groaned, "This is way too awkward for me to handle."

You chuckled and released her, stepping away and turning around to see Joel still standing there with a look of pure confusion etched all over his face. You walked back over to him and gave him a pat on the shoulder fondly.

"What was that all about?" he asked both of you, "Are we fighting or not?"

"Not," Ellie responded with a small smile, "Definitely not."

--

At around one o'clock you'd already overstayed your welcome at the springs and knew you had to get back on the proverbial road again. As much as you would have loved to spend another night in the cabin with Joel, in an actual bed, you both knew that time wasn't on your side. You still had a ways to go before Salt Lake City and you all just wanted to get it over with, have all of this behind you and be able to go back to Jackson with a clear conscious.

"So since you're not actually traumatized, we could probably start traveling by road again," Joel suggested about three hours into the days' hike, giving Ellie a semi-irritated look.

"You're never gonna let this go, are you?" she replied with a groan, "Come on, I did you a favor and you know it."

Joel flushed red and you giggled quietly, walking ahead of them a bit and listening to their familiar banter. It was so natural to settle back into things, the step you and Joel had taken together not really changing anything in the grand scheme of your little trio. It was a relief to hear them laugh together, rib each other, knowing Ellie was okay and Joel was okay and that was all that mattered.

Your mind kept playing back the image of him standing in front of you a few hours ago, baring himself to you, not just his body but his soul and his heart. My girl, he'd murmured to you in the spring, don't want anybody but you, you hear me? Nobody.

You smiled to yourself; you were his now. His girl.

Ultimately you all decided to stick to the heavy cover of the woods, knowing it was better to be safe than sorry. It would take a bit longer to get to the city but at least there was a less likely chance of one - if not all - of you dying before you got there. The forest just made more sense, and with it came the promise of another cozy night under your sleeping bag with Joel. It would be different this time, and you shivered at the notion.

"So you guys are together now, right?" Ellie asked a few hours later when you'd set up camp again, sun setting as she poked at the fire the way Joel had showed her.

You looked at Joel, unsure of what to say, but to your satisfaction he gave you a soft smile and then said kindly to Ellie, "Yeah, kiddo. We are."

--

Ellie had never set up her sleeping bag as far away from you as she did that night. You and Joel both watched as she settled into it and turned to face away from you, almost completely out of your eyeline and hidden by the dark branches of the trees. You'd both protested, but she'd been stubborn in her decision.

"You deserve alone time," she'd said, addressing you both like you were children and she was the adult, speaking slowly and clearly, "I'm giving you guys a free pass to be gross, please just let me."

"This is the most awkward conversation I've ever had," Joel had grumbled, head in his hands.

"Everybody poops, Joel," she replied, purposely trying to sound wise.

You'd both looked at her in confusion.

"Everybody poops," she repeated, "And everybody has sex."

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Joel had groaned, and practically kicked her away from the fire, "Go to bed."

"I'm just sayin'!" she'd called back with a grin, making her way over to her faraway sleeping spot, "I can't hear you over here!" and she was right; once she'd gotten into her sleeping bag you couldn't even hear the rustle of the fabric, let alone see what she was doing.

"God, she is so much like Sarah sometimes," Joel muttered beside you, and your eyebrows went up in surprise at his mention of her, turning to peer at him gently. He smiled crookedly at you, "She used to try to set me up on dates with her teachers."

You covered your mouth to stifle a laugh, "And how'd that work out?"

"Let's just say I'd lost my sixteen year old mojo by then," he replied with a grin, "Made Tommy go to the parent-teacher conferences so I wouldn't have to face 'em."

"Really? You were that against dating?"

He shook his head, "I wasn't against datin', just not with Sarah's much older and very married teachers."

You shrugged, "Nothing wrong with someone who's older, I think it's sexy," you wiggled your eyebrows and he rolled his eyes, tossing a pebble into the fire.

"Well, anyway, I did go on a few dates - ones that she didn't set up - but nothing panned out," he looked over at you and smiled tenderly, "Was waitin' for you, I think."

You scoffed, "Oh, now that's bullshit."

"No, sweetheart, that's flirting," he replied, and suddenly his hand was on your thigh, palm warm and flat through the denim, "Woulda thought you knew that."

Immediately your eyes fell to his hand, swallowing tightly at how large it was on your thigh, thumb gently stroking you through your jeans. You looked back up at him and involuntarily licked your lips, feeling a cascade of tingles flutter through your body when you saw him looking right at you.

"...Are we gonna have sex?" you asked bluntly, voice quiet, and the expression on his face changed from sensuality to shock as he released your leg and groaned, covering his face.

"How do you both do that?" he asked, voice muffled by his palms, "How do you just say shit without any thought?"

You covered your own mouth, trying not to giggle too loudly. He was right, you and Ellie both did have a bluntness about you, a desire to say what you felt before really thinking about it. You supposed asking him directly if you were going to have sex was probably not the sexiest thing in the world, but you were desperately out of practice.

"I'm sorry," you laughed softly, "I'm just... I'm not good at this. It's been a long time since I've...." you shook your head, "Like, I'm talking years, Joel. That long."

He gave you a smile and dropped his hands again, placing his left back on your thigh and squeezing it gently, reassuringly, "We don't have to, it's okay."

"But you want to," you replied immediately, "So do I, I'm just worried that..." your gaze scanned the tree line until you saw Ellie's still form, far away in the darkness.

"Let's just get in bed," he breathed, squeezing your thigh again, "We'll figure it out."

You felt yourself blush, starting to feel slightly self conscious as the reality of what was about to happen - because it was about to happen, you knew that - set in.

"Sleeping bag, you mean," you replied a bit breathlessly.

He cringed, "Oh. Right."

You both laughed and any tension you'd been feeling melted away in the warmth of his voice, the softness in his expression. You trusted him so much, you knew that if you asked him not to touch you he'd listen, would respect you completely. Your ears burned red as you shuffled over to the sleeping bag and thought alternatively that if you asked him to touch you, asked him to do pretty much anything to make you feel good, he'd do that too.

The safety you felt climbing underneath the sleeping bag beside him was unmatched; the last time you'd slept this way under the stars you'd still just been friends, allies, protectors. Now you were his girl, and you guessed that meant he was your guy. The thought made you smile.

You cuddled in close beside him, resting your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around you and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head. There was no more hesitation, no more questioning what anything meant, you were his and he was yours. Simple. Sweet.

You laid like that for a while, both of you secretly waiting until you were sure Ellie was asleep, even though you doubted she'd be able to hear you at this distance. Still, you waited, and so did he, just holding each other and quietly enjoying each other's company.

"I want to," you eventually told him softly, burrowing yourself into him more and inhaling his scent, so much fresher after his bath in the spring, "Take it slow, though, okay? Be...be gentle."

"Of course," he murmured, kissing your head again, "I'll go as slow as you need me to, I swear. The second I do something wrong, you tell me."

The next few minutes were pure bliss on their own as you both undressed each other in the darkness, feeling for buttons and zippers and laughing breathlessly as you exposed yourselves to one another again. It was different this time, laying there getting naked instead of standing across from each other. You reveled in how strong he felt beneath you, the way his fingers trailed up and down your back like they had in the spring, pulling you closer.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered, and carefully flipped you so he was on top, his big hands gliding across your body hungrily, "Don't know how you're real."

His words made you feel so warm, so safe. Your hands came up and tangled in his hair as he leaned down to capture one of your nipples in his mouth, tongue dancing across the sensitive little bumps that trailed across the flesh. You whimpered and pulled slightly at his curls, soft and silky under your touch.

You felt one of his hands snake down your torso and cup you where you were completely bare for him, already wet and begging to feel him. His finger slipped between your soft lips, opening you up for him and rubbing circles into your clit gently. He continued to suckle at your breast, the scruff of his beard scratching against your skin in the best possible way.

He pulled back to look up at you, eyes hooded and lustful, "Feel good, sweetheart?"

"Yes," you breathed, voice breaking, "Feels so good, Joel. Need more."

He smiled at you knowingly and pressed one final kiss to your nipple, thumb tracing it lightly before he slowly began to shuffle downward beneath the sleeping bag. You watched in slight confusion before you realized where he was going, what he was doing.

"Oh, fuck," you whispered, and he looked up at you again.

"Gonna taste you, that okay?"

You nodded, cheeks flushing a bright red, "If you want to."

He chuckled like you'd said something funny and pressed a tiny kiss to your hip bone, wet and warm, "I want to, baby. I've wanted to."

You watched with your lip between your teeth as he disappeared beneath the confines of the sleeping bag. Part of you wanted to lift it up and watch, but you weren't sure you could handle that level of vulnerability, not when you were already feeling so shy. You just closed your eyes and leaned your head back, taking deep breaths and focusing on the way his lips pressed more gentle kisses back and forth along your hips, your belly, your thighs. He was so tender, so sweet, so loving, it almost made you want to cry.

When he licked a gentle stripe along your center you felt yourself involuntarily begin to fist the blanket beneath you in both hands, trying not to make too much noise as he tasted you for the first time. His breath was so hot against your pussy, his lips damp and tongue so wet as he circled the tip of it around your clit, one of his hands pressing flush against your stomach, the other snaking up to your inner thigh to hold you open. You shook in his grasp, feeling yourself drip down onto the blanket, shaking even more when he pulled back to lap up what he could from one of your thighs.

"Joel," you moaned softly, eyes still closed as you reached down and felt for his hair, tugging on it gently.

"Is this okay?" he asked quietly, waiting for your reply before he went any further.

"Yes," you whined, "More." You didn't know where this demanding version of yourself had come from but he didn't seem to be complaining, chuckling softly to himself as he leaned back in to taste you again. He sucked gently on your clit, his beard pressed firmly against your throbbing hole. You couldn't see him but you knew he was probably covered in your wetness, practically dripping in it. The thought made you tense up, stomach tightening as you felt his tongue slip from your clit to your entrance and slowly prod its way inside.

"Oh, fuck," you groaned, fingers tightening in his hair, "Right there."

Listening to your encouragement, he pushed his tongue further inside of you, nosing your clit and holding you open a bit wider. He moved his hand from your stomach and brought it down to touch your pussy, slicking up his fingers before delicately pressing one in alongside his tongue. You writhed beneath his touch, pulling his hair probably a bit harder than you'd meant to, but he didn't seem to care.

"Gonna come," you said it apologetically, slightly ashamed as your legs squeezed his head between your thighs as he continued to fuck you with his tongue and finger, nose still pressed firmly against your clit like it belonged there. He didn't say anything, didn't stop, just kept licking and sucking and fingering until you were a complete mess, whimpering out his name hopelessly in the darkness. He kept going throughout your whole orgasm, only stopping when you told him to, completely overstimulated.

"You doin' okay?" he asked you softly, crawling back out from underneath the sleeping bag. You were right; his face was glistening with your release, beard wet and shining.

You reached up and touched his wet chin, scrunching up your nose, "I'm sorry."

He looked surprised by your words, "For what?"

"You're a mess," you replied, feeling embarrassed, "And I came too early."

He shook his head with a smile, "Sweetheart, the mess is the best part."

--

He didn't want you to suck him, admitting to you with a hint of guilt in his voice that he would end up coming before getting to actually be inside you, and you made a mental note to make sure you tasted him next time. It was only fair.

Plus, you wanted to. Very badly.

You now found yourselves laying underneath the sleeping bag again, him spooning you from behind and kissing your neck as he fingered you steadily, groin pressed firmly against you. It was so different now that you were both naked, his cock sitting large and heavy against your ass while the head bobbed back and forth along your lower back, leaving your skin sticky and wet. Your eyes were closed, a stream of whines and whimpers falling from your lips as he pushed a third finger inside and fucked you slowly, whispering things in your ear that you'd only dreamt of.

"Takin' my fingers so well," he murmured, kissing your ear tenderly and pulling some of your hair back and out of your face, "Gotta get you ready for my cock, don't wanna hurt you, baby."

"I need it," you moaned, leaning back into his touch, feeling his hand reach down to cup one of your breasts, "Joel, please, I'm ready."

"Okay, sweetheart," he whispered, "Lay on your back for me."

Lying there underneath the sky as Joel situated himself above you, seeing his gorgeous body silhouetted against the shape of the moon and the twinkling of stars, you knew in that moment that this was exactly where you were supposed to be. You watched with tender fondness in your eyes as he placed his hands above you, leaned down to press a soft kiss to your cheek, and aligned himself at your entrance.

"I'm so glad you exist," you breathed, wanting him to know how you felt, wanting him to feel it the way you'd felt it that first night.

"Baby," he breathed, brow furrowing as the head of his cock slipped inside you slowly, "I don't exist without you."

You wrapped your arms around him, holding him close as he pushed himself inside inch by inch, watching your face and making sure it felt good, making sure you wanted it. You'd never wanted anything more in your life than you wanted him at that moment.

He found a rhythm easily, fucking into you slowly and steadily while he cradled your head and peppered kisses all along your skin, showing you continuously how much he wanted you. In response you held him tighter, hands pressed flush against the width of his strong back as he plunged in and out of you. Every so often he'd make sure to look directly in your eyes, give you those special smiles he reserved especially for you, and whisper to you how good it felt.

"You're so big," you whispered, voice broken and weak, "So fucking big."

"Doesn't hurt, does it?" he asked, slowing a bit and peering down at you with concern, "Don't need me to stop?"

You shook your head frantically, "No, don't stop, feels so good, Joel," you looked up at him earnestly, feeling tears prick in your eyes, "Go faster, please."

He didn't need telling twice, picking up his pace, bringing down one of his hands to thumb your clit as he fucked you, bringing you closer and closer to the edge. You dug your nails into his back, eyes shutting tightly as he pounded into you over and over.

"Where do you want me to come, sweetheart?" he groaned in your ear, breath hot against your skin, "Tell me where, quick."

"Anywhere," you whimpered, biting down hard on your lip as he rubbed your clit furiously, wanting to get you there at the same time as him, "You can come anywhere you want, please."

"Oh, fuck," he groaned, "Tell me when you're coming, wanna come with you, baby."

"I'm close" you replied almost immediately, eyes going wide as you watched him start to fall apart above you, "Oh my god, don't stop, don't stop." you gripped his wrist tightly as he pressed harder on your clit, sending you over the edge, "Right there, Joel, right there."

You felt him pull out of you as you began to shake with your orgasm, body convulsing underneath him as he aimed his cock at your breasts and painted you with his come, marking you. Your eyes rolled back in your head, his fingers still stimulating your clit over and over until you'd finished.

"Oh my god," he groaned, deep and husky, the last few aftershocks wracking through his body as he released his fingers from your clit and brought them to his cock, slicking himself up as he fisted himself a few more times, small spurts of come still pulsing out of him and onto your chest.

"Fuck," you breathed in response, throwing your arms above you and laying there panting. The stars had somehow moved from the sky and were now permanently dancing behind your lids, white and sparkling every time you closed your eyes.

Your body was heavy and warm, relaxed and satisfied. You didn't want to move. And you didn't have to, feeling Joel wipe you gently with some of the toilet paper you'd stolen from the resort, taking extra care to make sure he cleaned your thighs as well. Eyes still closed, breath becoming more and more even, you felt him swipe the tissue along your breasts, slow and gentle.

"Almost done," he murmured, ripping off another piece and pressing it to your forehead where you realized you were practically drenched with sweat. He wiped it off and stroked your hair, kissing your temple lightly before settling in beside you. He pulled you in close, his body still naked and warm, heart pounding quickly against your back.

"I love you," you whispered into the darkness.

He pulled you impossibly closer, nosing your neck and breathing you in, "I love you," he whispered, like he'd said it a thousand times before.

And maybe he had.

[slut4thebroken]

bite me

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Pairing | Jason Todd x vampire!reader

Summary | Jason is an annoying little shit who likes to tease you.

Warnings | Sexual content, 18+, cutting? (barely), blood drinking, oral (male receiving), face fucking, vaginal fingering, hand job, praise, degradation w a sprinkle of humiliation, flirting, kissing, grinding, bad puns.

Words | 4.7 k

Notes | Idk I had a vision one day and this is what came of it. (Also this is part 29373928 of me not being able to find a good gif/pic for Jay 😔)

Ao3 link | <3

Masterlist

You’ve never been an optimist. Ever since you can remember, you’ve had a glass half empty view of the world. There’s no specific reason why, that’s just how you are. Which is why if someone told you you’d be working with crime fighting vigilantes, you would’ve laughed in their face. 

People are bad. That’s what you’ve learned so far in your 40 years of life. People are bad and there’s no saving them. “That doesn’t mean we can’t save the good ones from the bad.” He had said. “What good ones?” You asked, but the more you thought about it, the more you understood what he meant. 

That’s how you found yourself working with the bat. Or more specifically, the bat boys. Mostly Dick and Jason though. 

Mostly Jason. 

You tried not to think too hard about that. When you first met, you just clicked. His energy was a near perfect match for yours. That’s not to say you don’t like the other bat boys… Jason’s just different. He’s Jason.  

“So you like- drink people’s blood? Or…” That was the first thing he said to you. 

“I try not to. But stealing blood bags is a hassle and I love animals too much to do that. I mostly try to hold off for as long as possible so I don’t have to feed as often. That makes me weaker though.” And Bruce couldn't have a weak vigilante underling, so he arranged for you to have a fully stocked fridge of blood bags. You didn’t ask where or how he got them. You can get anything if you have enough money. 

“How old are you?” You didn’t mind his curiosity, it’s a natural reaction. After all, it's not everyday people meet a vampire. But you’ve always hated this question in particular. It’s embarrassing. When people think of vampires they think of 100+ year olds. Not someone who’s literally younger than their parents. 

“40.” 

“How old were you when you turned?” 

“20.” 

Another reason you and Jason click so well is because of shared trauma. Kind of… You both died. His death was a lot worse than yours and at least you came out of it with abilities, rather than enhancements, but it was nice finally knowing someone who gets it. Most people can’t fathom what it would be like to die and come back to life so they don’t understand how bad it can actually be. 

And then there was the flirting. It was less flirting and more just him driving you up the wall to be honest. But either way you loved it. You’d never tell him that though. 

It started with more casual jokes like “Are those fangs or are you just happy to see me” and asking if you wanted to “get a bite to eat.” But obviously, because it’s Jason, the more comfortable you got with each other, the more sexual they became. 

“What kind of sex do vampires like?” He was trying to hide his smirk and you just rolled your eyes, not acknowledging him. “Vein-illa.” You scoffed and his smirk widened. “What, you don’t like it?” 

“No, Jason. I don’t. You’re not funny.” You feigned seriousness but you knew he knew you didn’t mean it. 

Another time, he walked into the living room where you were sitting, sipping on a blood bag and reading a book. He sat down next to you and you could feel his eyes on you. 

“Is it true what they say about lady vampires?” He asked and you raised your brows as you looked at him with a deadpan expression. “That they really know how to suck.” 

Rolling your eyes, you muttered, “Bite me.” Which instantly proved to be a mistake as it gave him another way to tease you. 

“I thought that was your thing?” He smirked and you considered moving your foot to kick him in the head. “Come on, don’t be such a sucker. It’s just a joke.” 

“Jason,” Your voice was eerily calm, “if you say one more vampire pun, I will rip your throat out so you can’t talk anymore.” 

“Not even just one more? To really hit the nail on the coffin.” You slammed your book shut and glared at him as you stood up. 

“Come on, babe. I’m just teasing.” He smirked and you started walking away, but he grabbed your wrist and yanked you backwards, making you fall on top of him with your back pressed to his front. “Don’t be mad. Please?” He said lowly, against your ear, making you shiver. 

“You’re so annoying, you know that?” You mumbled, settling into your position. He let out a low chuckle and moved his hands to run up and down your thighs. 

“Yeah but you love it.” 

“Do I now?” Against your will, your voice was turning breathless because of the prolonged proximity. 

“Oh definitely.” His hands gravitated toward your inner thighs, but he kept up the motions. “Just like you love me. It was love at first bite.” You groaned in annoyance and moved to stand, but his grip on your thighs tightened and he pulled you back onto his lap. 

“Jason,” You warned, trying to sound threatening, “if you don’t let me go, I will rip your throat out.” 

“Why? You don’t like being in my lap?” He teased and you huffed. 

“No.” You gritted, trying to ignore the way you could smell his arousal and how that made you want to grind your ass back against his dick. 

“I think you’re lying, babe.” 

“Stop calling me babe. That’s like the worst pet name you could pick.”  

Only a week later, you were standing in front of the fridge as you chugged a blood bag. You didn’t really need one yesterday, but today you did so much training that you felt like you were going to collapse any second now. 

“I'll let you suck me dry.” You could hear the smirk in his voice as he walked in. 

“Shut up.” You muttered, just barely pulling away long enough to get the words out. He chuckled and moved toward you, making you step back the closer he got. When you hit the counter, he placed both hands on either side of your body, caging you in. 

You finally finished the blood bag and pulled it away from your mouth, wiping the blood that had dripped onto your bottom lip. When you looked up at him, you found his gaze on your lips for only a second before it moved up to your eyes. 

“That’s not very nice, princess. I’m just making a proposal, no need to be so rude.” He said, making you raise your brows. 

“A proposal? To what, suck your dick? Hard pass.” You scoffed and tried to push past him, but his grip was unmoving on the counter. You could move him… technically. But… you’re enjoying the game. 

“That’s exactly what I’m proposing.” He grinned, making you roll your eyes. 

“And why would I do that?” Your confidence never wavered, even as your cheeks started to grow warm. 

“Because you like sucking. It’s not all that different, really.” 

“No?”

“Nope.” 

“What, so anyone who drinks with a straw automatically likes sucking dick? How do you even know I’m not lesbian.” That made him chuckle lowly. 

“Princess, you’re not lesbian.” He condescended

“Fuck off.” You groaned, pushing his chest lightly. He retaliated by moving his body forward until he was completely flush against you. 

“One of these days I’m gonna fuck that attitude right out of you.” He growled and you swallowed thickly as you watched his eyes darken. 

“I’d like to see you try.” You said through a breath. 

“I’m sure I will soon.” He smirked, then just walked away from you. 

“Do you even like the blood bags?” 

“I don’t know how to explain it. They’re not bad… they’re just- it’s like a freshly made pizza versus reheated pizza, you know?” 

“Do you want the fresh stuff?” 

“Obviously,” You laughed dryly, “but the first and only time I did that, I killed them. So it’s not worth it.” You tried not to focus too much on the memory. 

“What if you drank from me?” Your eyes widened as you replayed his words in your head, making sure you heard him right. 

“What? No- did you not hear what I just said?” 

“You won’t kill me.” He scoffed a laugh and you just stared at him. 

“Jason, I’m serious. I can’t control it. And plus, it’s… a lot more- um… erotic, than media makes it out to be.” 

“Even better.” His lips curled into a smirk and you felt your cheeks grow warm. 

“I still can’t control myself.” 

“I think you can. You need to give yourself more credit. What were the circumstances of the last time you drank from someone?” 

“It was a few hours after I… woke up, so to speak.” 

“That’s completely different. You were starving and barely even knew what was happening. You had a blood bag yesterday and have spent 20 years controlling yourself. Here, I’ll prove it.” 

“What?” Before you even finished asking, he was taking a small knife out of his pants. “What are you doing?” You asked nervously, watching as the knife flipped open and he presented his arm. 

“Relax, babe.” He brought the blade down to his arm and you stiffened. 

“Jason, don’t-“ You cut yourself off with a sharp breath when the scent immediately engulfed you. He removed the knife and you watched a drop of red trail down his arm. 

You could feel yourself turning- your eyes changing color and fangs coming out. You squeezed your eyes shut and dug your nails into the palms of your hands. 

“Jason…” Your voice was a strained whisper, then you felt his thumb on your lips. Your eyes snapped open as your chest heaved at the scent of his blood right in front of your face. 

“It’s okay.” He said quietly, his gaze moving between your eyes and mouth. You couldn’t help it anymore when your lips closed around the digit. Letting out a low groan, your eyes fluttered shut as you sucked his thumb into your mouth more, careful to avoid your fangs. 

“How’re you feeling?” His voice broke you from your haze and he removed his thumb, making you whimper. 

“More.” You whined, reaching for his arm. He let you take it and watched as your mouth closed around the small cut. 

You’d forgotten what fresh blood tastes like. It’s like a cold glass of water when you wake up in the middle of the night. Or a dessert that’s so good, it makes it feel like your mouth it’s having an orgasm. 

Your grip on his arm tightened considerably and distantly you heard him wince but he didn’t pull away. The cut was small enough that the amount of blood you got was basically like a shot. And you wanted a full glass. 

Your fangs grazed his skin as you panted, getting ready for more. But before you could bite, his free hand grabbed a fistful of hair and he roughly pulled your head away. You whined and sat up on your knees as you tried moving his arm to your mouth but he just tightened his grip and pulled your head back until you were almost looking at the ceiling. 

“Please.” If you weren’t so blood drunk, you would've been embarrassed about how whiny your voice sounds. He said your name in a warning and you finally looked at his eyes. The color was almost completely gone because of how dilated his pupils were. 

“Don’t be greedy.” The way he reprimanded you was infantilizing. But god if it didn’t make you even needier. 

“I need more.” You whimpered. Your mouth was still watering as you panted, desperate to get your mouth back on him. “Please, Jay. You taste so good, please I- I need more.” 

“What did I just say?” You let out a choked sob as your hunger rivaled your need for his praise and approval. 

“I- I promise I won’t take too much. Just- I just… please.” You cried, practically on top of him now. He removed his hand from your hair and helped you settle on his lap, then placed it on your neck. Your head felt even lighter as he tightened his grip and you couldn’t deny that not only were you drunk on blood but you were drunk on him too. 

“Baby… Look at you. So fucking desperate for just a drop. I bet you’d do anything for it, wouldn’t you?” He cooed, the condescending tone flying right over your head. You nodded eagerly and he let out a low chuckle.  

“You poor thing. If only there was something I wanted in return…” He pretended to think and you whined once you caught on to what he meant. 

“I’ll- I’ll do it.”

“Don’t just say that because you want more blood.” 

“No I- I want to. I have wanted to.” His smirk returned. 

“Yeah? You were just playing hard to get, is that it?” You hummed in agreement and nodded. 

“God I want to so bad.” You groaned. “I can- I can smell you and it’s making me so fucking wet.” 

“The smell of my blood makes you wet?” He was teasing you, but there was still a hint of surprise in his voice. 

“No- no… I can smell how-“ You let out an embarrassed whine and closed your eyes. 

“Tell me, baby.” 

“I can smell how turned on you are. And it’s driving me fucking crazy— I can barely think.” He stiffened and you opened your eyes to find him looking at you in shock with pink cheeks. 

“Have you always been able to smell that?” He asked quietly and you bit your lip as you nodded. 

“It always smells so fucking good. You smell good normally but that just— god I think it’s my favorite scent.” You don’t know why you’re saying all of this. You’d normally be too shy, but something is just making you want to confess everything to him. 

“That’s so fucking hot.” He groaned, closing his eyes and throwing his head back. The sight of his neck bared to you made your hips buck forward into his as your mouth watered and your mind went blank. He opened his eyes to find your gaze on his neck and you watched as he swallowed thickly. You could practically hear the blood rushing through his veins. 

“You look like you want to eat me.” He chuckled nervously. 

“I do.” You whispered, bringing your hand up to drag a finger over his pulse. His breathing grew heavier the longer he watched you. When you subconsciously started leaning toward him, his hand tightened on your neck and he pushed you back a little. 

You could overpower him. You know you could. Sure he’s a far better fighter than you, but you’re ten times stronger than he is. When you looked into his eyes though, all fight just evaporated from your body. The only thing you wanted was him. In any form you could have him. 

You slowly started moving your hips, grinding your cunt on his length over the far too many layers of clothing. He let out a low groan and took his bottom lip between his teeth as he eyed you. 

“What do you wanna suck first?” He gruffed, bringing both hands to your hips to guide your movements. 

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to get rid of the fangs in my current state to be honest.” You said through a breath, placing your hands on his shoulders and grinding harder against him as you grew more desperate. “It might be better to do that last anyway cause I wasn’t lying when I said blood drinking is more erotic than what everyone thinks.” 

“Okay, princess. Have at it.” He leaned his head back on the couch, baring his throat to you.

“You have to stop me though. I don’t want to take too much.” Despite your desperation, you were still terrified of killing him. He agreed and you slowly moved forward. The closer you got, the stronger the scent became. When your nose brushed the delicate skin, you inhaled deeply and closed your eyes. His grip tightened on your hips and his already fast heart rate increased slightly. 

“Your heart’s beating really fast.” You whispered, trying to hold off at least until he replied. 

“That’s kind of what happens when I have a hot girl on my lap breathing against my neck.” He chuckled breathlessly, but abruptly cut off with a sharp inhale when your fangs brushed his throat. 

Your patience finally ran out and you tried to be as gentle as possible when you bit him, but the second the blood rushed into your mouth, all thoughts of that disappeared. You felt the vibrations against your lips as he let out a deep moan when your teeth pierced his skin. You started sucking now and his grip turned bruising on your hips, but after only a second or two, he thrusted up, meeting your movements halfway. 

You whimpered at the constant grinding of his bulge against your clit and the taste of him. God you wanted to taste him forever. 

“Fuck…” He said through a moan. You snaked a hand up to his hair and gripped it tightly, holding him against your mouth- not that he was trying to move away. 

“God- I feel like I’m about to come.” He whined. By now, he was basically using your body to get himself off, you weren’t moving your hips on your own at all anymore. You moaned in acknowledgement but never removed your mouth, wanting to get as much as he’d let you have. 

“Fuck- princess, I’m gonna come if you don’t stop.” While a distant part of you wanted him to come in your mouth instead, you couldn’t bring yourself to stop. Unfortunately, he made that choice for you. He grabbed your hair again and pulled you away from him, making you whine loudly. 

“As hot as this is, I’d rather come in your mouth.” He rasped, trying to catch his breath. You nodded absentmindedly, but never removed your gaze from his neck. The sight of a drop of blood trailing down had you moving forward before he could stop you. You licked a stripe up his neck, doing your best to control yourself and not dive back in for more. When you reluctantly pulled back again, he gave you a proud smile, making your stomach flutter. 

“Think you can get rid of ‘em now?” You nodded and closed your eyes, trying to focus. It took a moment, but once you started focusing on the scent of his arousal rather than his blood, it was pretty easy. Opening your eyes, you gave him a small smile and he pulled you closer, pressing his lips to yours. You gasped but quickly recovered and kissed him back, melting into him and pulling on his hair, trailing your other hand up to rest on his shoulder. His kiss was bruising, but you loved it all the same. When he pulled back, he pressed his forehead against yours, both of your breaths fanning across the other’s face. 

“Why the fuck does that feel so good?” He finally asked, both of you releasing breathy laughs. 

“I have no clue but I’m glad it does.” You pulled back a few inches so you could look at him. “Now if you don’t mind, I believe you promised me something else to suck on.” You smirked and he raised his brows. 

“Wow, a little blood straight from the source and now you’re eager for it, huh? I’ll keep that in mind.” He smirked, making your cheeks heat up. “How ‘bout you show me just how eager you are?” You looked at him with furrowed brows, trying to understand what he meant, even though you were pretty sure you already knew. “Go on, baby. Beg for it.” Your entire face and neck flushed at that. 

“You’re pushing your luck.” You narrowed your eyes, playfully. 

“See, I don’t think I am.” He raised his brows again, as if he was waiting for a protest that you both knew would never come. “Go ahead, then I’ll give you what you want.” You bit your lip, your pride and neediness waging a war inside you.  

“Please.” You muttered, bored. 

“Not convinced.” He shrugged, making you glare at him. 

“You’re the one who wanted me to do this in the first place!” 

“Really? Because I remember you saying you’re the one who “wants it” and “has wanted it.’” He smirked and you clenched your jaw with a huff. 

“Please can I suck you off.” You tried to put a little more emotion into it. 

“Suck what?” You let out an annoyed groan and rolled your eyes.  

“Your cock. I wanna suck your cock… please.” You mumbled, not being able to meet his gaze. 

“There we go,” He cooed mockingly, “that wasn’t so hard was it?” You scowled, making him chuckle. Sliding off of him, you landed on your knees between his legs. You eyed his bulge and bit your lip, not being able to control your thighs squeezing together. He placed his hands behind his head and settled into the couch with a smirk. 

“Keep looking at me like that and I’ll bite it.” You growled, making his smirk widen. 

“Just admiring the view.” Ignoring him, you reached up to undo his pants, then tentatively freed his cock. He really did look like he was about to come any second now. The tip was so red it almost looked painful and you watched as it twitched in your grip, desperate for more stimulation. 

Slowly leaning down, you licked the bead of precum on the top as you looked up at him through your lashes, making him let out a low groan. 

“Fuck my face.” You whispered, breath fanning his cock. 

“Fuck- are you sure?” Even though you didn’t answer yet, his hand was still making its way to your hair, running his fingers through it before gripping lightly. 

“Yes.” He didn’t need any more convincing. Wrapping your lips around the head of his cock, you swirled your tongue around it as you waited for him to start. He all but whimpered as he slowly pushed you down his length, not stopping until your lips reached the base. You watched his chest heave as he moved his other hand to join the one already in your hair. He adjusted his grip, then started moving you up and down his length. 

When he threw his head back with a low moan, you eyed the remaining blood that was starting to drip down his neck. Even though you wanted nothing more than to taste him again, you had to force your thoughts elsewhere before your fangs reappeared. 

He started moving your head faster now, still pushing you all the way down, despite your light gagging and choking. It wasn’t long before he was holding your head still and thrusting up into your mouth, bucking his hips wildly as he chased his orgasm. 

“Shit- I’m not gonna last,” He said through a moan, only thrusting a few more times before pushing your head all the way down and holding you there. You felt hot come hitting the back of your throat and you let out a garbled moan, making him whimper. 

Fucking whimper. 

That made you push a hand down your underwear and start rubbing fast circles on your clit. Which he seemed to appreciate, since it made you moan around his length again. His sounds died down until he sagged into the couch, chest heaving. His grip on your hair relaxed and you slowly pulled off of him, making sure to swallow any remaining come that didn’t immediately make its way down your throat. 

“Jay,” You whined, voice raspy and needy. He opened his eyes and looked down at you, then trailed his gaze down your body. Even though him watching was making you nervous, you couldn’t stop touching yourself. “Please.” 

“What are you begging for, princess?” He gave you a sleepy smile and stroked your hair gently. 

“Wanna come.” You whimpered, leaning into his touch. 

“Yeah?” All you could do was nod. “You poor thing.” He cooed, cupping your cheek before pulling you up to straddle his legs. His hands rubbed up and down your thighs teasingly, making you whine. 

“Please.” You gave him your best puppy dog eyes and it wasn’t long before he folded. He brought his hand to the apex of your thighs and lightly brushed his fingers over your clothed heat. Your breath hitched as your hips bucked into his touch and you were about to tell him to hurry up but his hand was already making its way inside your pants and underwear. When he ran two fingers through your dripping folds, he cursed under his breath. 

“Sucking my cock did this?” He asked breathlessly. All you could do was whine and nod. “Or was it sucking my blood…” His fingers just barely brushed over your hole and your clit, teasing you. 

“Both.” You whined, hips squirming. “Jay, c’mon.” Before you could even finish those two words, he was inserting a finger. You choked on a gasp and brought your hands up to hold on to his shoulders. He moved it fast inside you as the heel of his hand stimulated your clit and you could already feel yourself nearing your orgasm. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, head falling forward as you panted and moaned. When you opened your eyes, you were met with the sight of his cock, still wet from your mouth, getting hard again. So you moved your hand down and grasped it, immediately stroking to bring him back to full hardness.  

“Shit— fuck, princess… Sensitive,” He gasped out, hips bucking up into your hand despite his words. You raised your head to look at his face and almost moaned at his expression. His brows were furrowed, mouth open in a silent moan, eyes dark and half lidded. 

“I wanna come…” You whispered, biting your bottom lip and stroking his cock faster. When he pushed a second finger inside, you whimpered, grinding down on his hand. 

“I bet you do.” He said, trying and failing to hide the smirk growing on his lips. 

“Jay,” you whined, almost obnoxiously, “please.” 

“I dunno… doesn’t really seem like you want it that bad.” He shrugged, fingers picking up the pace. 

“I do! Please let me come, I need it.” He let out a low chuckle and raised his brows. 

“You need it, huh?” You replied with a whimper and a nod. “Okay, princess. Since you need it so bad, go ahead.” He smirked. You all but breathed a sigh of relief. 

“Thank you.” You whispered, closing your eyes to ready yourself. 

“Look at me.” Your eyes opened, wondering why he was prolonging it. “Good girl. I want you to keep your eyes on me as you come, understand?” You clenched around his fingers at the praise and agreed. You did your best to focus on stroking his cock so he could maybe come with you, but as you neared the edge, it became increasingly more difficult. Your eyes flickered between his face and his cock, and when you saw the precum beading at the tip, you dragged your thumb over it and lifted it to your mouth, moaning at the taste. He cursed under his breath and moved his fingers even faster inside you. 

When you finally fell over the edge, you squeezed your eyes shut, but quickly opened them again when you remembered his words. His fingers never even faltered as your walls fluttered around them. When you started unconsciously humping his hand to get the most of your orgasm, you felt his cock twitch in your hand and you looked down, finding spurts of come shooting out, landing on his shirt and your hand. You whimpered at the sound of his moans, feeling your fading arousal start to return. 

When his fingers slowed to a stop, you did the same with your hand, then let go of his softening length. You winced when he slid his fingers out, but your lips parted when he sucked your arousal off of them, letting out an exaggerated moan at the taste. 

“Stop being a tease.” You frowned, making him smirk.

“You love it.” 

You just rolled your eyes, biting your lip to hide your smile. 

[friendlyshaped]

WRITEBLR INTRO :D

hello! my name is scottie! i am a 20 yr. old nb college student trying to write a fantasy series (among other minor projects!), looking for active writers to be mutuals and interact with (bonus if ur open to beta reading! or want a beta reader!) :D ask/tag open! i love talking to people, so don't be afraid to say hi :)

my current focus is coming-of-age queer fantasy, but i also focus on dystopian themes, horror, romance, and a sprinkle of futuristic sci-fi

CURRENT WIPS!

mya laine and the world of wonder (main)

generally, about creation! coping with being created, and then in turn having to create yourself. also, because i only knonw how to write two things, almost every relationship in this is a lesbian relationship! i am currently trying to make it a bit less Only Lesbians, but also? who fucking cares if it is a fantasy coming of age with literally only lesbian relationships. like... i dont? i'm well aware that i am biased but i still dont care

dehisce

(of a pod or seed vessel, or a cut or wound) gape or burst open.

also lesbians! contains time shenanigans and dragons. set in a world sort of exactly like the Modern Pre-Crown World in fionna and cake. i reference this because my main lady penny is a silly little history buff and decides to go on this expedition to find more information on a lost goddess, and ends up getting entangled with time. after a long, emotional trek that goes wrong more times than it goes right. penny somehow manages to get sent thousands of years in the future when the world has been ravaged by magic and godly power. and then she meets a girl who has a dragon and a dude that does everything she says, and more shit happens!

untitled crime story (now: unorthodox methods!)

i will not stop calling it untitled crime story!!! but i had to come up with a silly and catchy title because i chose this as a premise for the feature film script i'm writing for class. but untitled crime story i'll remember you

you guessed it.... lesbians.............. but they're exes with sooo much unspoken beef and they go off-grid together anyways so neither of them get put in prison ??? it's in a world where magic is normal and a bit frowned upon, now getting out of have because there's a global shortage of the one drug that suppresses magical powers. and this girl's ex calls her one night! the fun ex---she's supposed to be fun!! but she sounds super terrified and serious and chaos ensues! lesbians running from magical authorities and having to face their very long, very loud shared history.

finally edited it! this post just doubles as my wip masterpost :) i do not feel like doing a whole new post i am just here to have fun

ok <3 thats kinda it. thank you for reading!

[watermelon-jooce]

OKAY dont flame me for this, but heres a Saiki K hot take that I think shoukd be talked about more.

I feel like people REALLY have to start taking what Kuusuke did to Toritsuka more seriously, because its pretty bad the more you think about it.

⚠️Large TW for emotional manipulation and gr00ming undertones. ⚠️

(‼️if you're gonna debate please read all first‼️)

I can't find the specific panels, but what Kuusuke did to Toritsuka was taking advantage of him, he pried on his insecurities.

Kuusuke was seen telling Toritsuka how much "better" he is than Kusuo, how he has better powers, how he should be put on a pedestal instead of stupid old Kusuo.

Toritsuka is seen before hand disliking his own powers. He want's more from them, he wants them to be less useless. Kuusuke knows this, because Toritsuka is honest and probably told him.

Instead of offering help, he pried in on that insecurity. By telling Toritsuka that he's better than Kusuo, that he's more important, Toritsuka was drawn in so quickly. He'd never really been told or praised for his power before, most people not believing him for being a Medium or others saying his powers are useless.

When Toritsuka was finally told by Kuusuke that he was better, that someone finally believed he was better than the person he always compared himself to.

Toritsuka seems easily impressionable, we don't get to see his father much if at all, and we haven't heard about his mother at all. Im assuming he lives in the temple with little to zero family, being raised by the temple instead of his own parents.

He probably lacked good life lessons, Toritsuka always goes to others for help, he begs because its all he most likely knows how to do.

Kuusuke knows this, and he uses it against him. He knows Toritsuka has a grudge against Kusuo for his powers, he knows Toritsuka is insecure about his own, he knows Toritsuka is vunerable with this information.

And what does he do? He emotionally manipulates Toritsuka into helping him attack Kusuo with the Cat Tank.

Yeah, you could be thinking, well Kuusuke is a bad person mostly in a whole(I could go on and on about why he is the way he is), and that he's bound to manipulate others into doing what he wants, but when you really think about it, Kuusuke is an 19/20 year old adult that took advantage of a 16 year old kid.

Could it be considered that Kuusuke technically groomed Toritsuka? Grooming is not always 'adult takes advantage of a child for something explicit', grooming can be taking advantage of a child for something in return. It's not always for the other, much worse, option, I'm not saying Kuusuke is a kiddy diddler, im saying he groomed Toritsuka to get what he wanted, which was to attack Kusuo.

I have seen someone talk about this before, I can't remember who but someone had mentioned the gravity of it and the strange undertones of what Kuusuke did to Toritsuka, finding a child and taking advantage of his insecurities to get what he wants through emotional manipulation.

I know you could say that 'Kuusuke is about only 19/20, he's not much older than Toritsuka who is 16/17' But that is heavily, heavily besides the point. The point is that Kuusuke is still an adult. Kuusuke is known to be one of the smartest people to live. Toritsuka is a child, and Toritsuka is still in school.

Again, please understand I'm not saying Kuusuke is a kiddy diddler. I don't want people to flame me for 'thinking that.' Kuusuke obviously has a lot of problems of his own, and emotional manipulation is something he is used to doing and probably doesn't even realise he's doing it because it helps him get what he wants.

I can see how its just emotional manipulation, and I am willing to hear anybody out on this and debate(politely), and if i'm wrong I will admit I am wrong.

But AGHH this has really been eating at my brain. Kuusuke manipulating Toritsuka using his insecurities and stuff to get what he wants is just super weird to me. Kuusuke is obviously a more creepy character, and I believe if the anime were more serious it would play a lot more on that fact.

But yeah, this is what I believe what happened. Again, its a really heavy topic so if you guys wanna tell me im wrong you can tell me im wrong and I will hear you out. I was just thinking about it and after seeing one person mention it a while back its been in the back of my mind for a while.

Not saying its wrong to love Kuusuke, I know the fandom is split on him. I personally don't care about whether someone loves him or not, cause one side you can say he got his freak off to his brother, but the other side says he was just excited and not doing anything weird. Kuusuke is a really interesting character and I really wanna do a big essay on him like this soon.

But yeah thats all I had to say, just remember if you guys wanna tell me im wrong you can tell me im wrong and I will hear you out.

(can you guys tell i dont wanna be destroyed)

[20dollarlolita]

My friend is getting some crap on instagram about perceived classism in the lolita community, and as someone who runs a budget-focused lolita fashion blog, I'm going to rehash some of the old "but I can't afford burando!" conversation.

For some background reading, here's where I bought three "lolita" "dresses" off ebay, and what I actually received for my money. And here's a breakdown of one of those specifically. I'm linking to these because I want everyone to remember that the pictures on ebay, amazon, wish, etc do not represent what the actual piece you receive will look like.

Lolita fashion can be expensive, but the less expensive end of legitimate lolita fashion is not actually as expensive as many people think it is. It's not all $300 for a dress and $60 for a pair of socks. There are options that bring the price down to other fashions. It cannot compete with the hyper-fast fashion of Shein and H&M and other places where the clothing is designed to be disposable. This is because lolita clothing is not disposable. Even modified or damaged, lolita fashion pieces have resell value. It's very common for people to be wearing garments that are over ten years old. There's also a lot of documentation about how hyper-fast fashion is damaging to the environments where it's made and the people who made it.

Okay, so that's all very fine and well, but it's true that recognizing that something is worth the money doesn't actually get you the money to buy it. There's a lot of things that I recognize are worth the money it costs to buy them, but that I don't have the money for. I don't drive a high-end electric car, even though I think it would be a better choice for me, because I don't have the money for a high-end electric car. So I do, very distinctly, understand that. I'm not about to tell someone "just save up for it!"

But, when someone tells you that you cannot buy lolita fashion on wish dot com, they're not actually saying "you won't be accepted in a wish dot com dress." They're saying, "any money you spend on a wish dot com dress will be wasted, because you will not receive a usable garment." Let's play pretend for a second. You come up to me with $20 and say, "I'd like to buy clothes." I say, "Good. I'll sell you some clothes." I then take your $20 bill, rip it into small pieces, eat all of the pieces, and say, "that's your clothes." Now, you didn't actually get any clothes from that, and there's no way you're getting your $20 back because I have consumed it. Your friend comes up to me and says, "Hi, I'd like to buy clothes." You say, "Don't give her that $20! It will be a waste of money!" Your friend says, "That's classism, because I only have $20." That's the conversation that's happening right now on my friend's instagram.

Classism does exist in the lolita fashion community. It can even come from people with good intentions. But, when it comes to buying on Ebay and Amazon and Walmart.com, people who are saying, "you can't buy lolita fashion on walmart dot com," aren't saying, "we won't accept your walmart dot com dress, because it was cheap." What they're saying is, "the thing that the site is telling you that you're buying and the thing that you will receive are going to be two different things. The thing you will receive will barely be a garment." There's a reason why, when I say "lolita dress from ebay," I have to typeset it as "'lolita' 'dress' from ebay," because it will probably be neither lolita nor a dress.

If you're new to the fashion and want a good shopping resource, 42lolita is a reseller/shopping service that will tell you what the shipping will be up front. Many other resellers will send you the shipping costs after you make the purchase, which makes it harder to predict what you'll be paying. You won't be getting a dress for $20 on 42lolita or anywhere else, but the prices they charge are more in line with shopping at a department store, rather than shopping at a big name designer store. There's a lot of other ways to purchase lolita fashion, and I just used 42lolita as one example.

The number of people who genuinely want the fashion to be as expensive as possible is not all that big. Even people who occasionally buy a $300 dress enjoy finding inexpensive accessories and support pieces. Finding lolita-usable jewelry on the Walmart clearance rack is a thing that's exciting to most people in the fashion. If there was a secret to buying $20 dresses on ebay and getting something that could be used in the fashion, people in the fashion would absolutely already be doing that.

So anyway, yeah, there's classism in the lolita community, but telling someone that they should not give me $20 for clothes when experience shows that I'm just going to rip it up and eat is not classism. Friends don't let friends spend money on badly made replicas on aliexpress.

[sl-walker]

Booster's Queer af

Something I wrote on Reddit on a thread asking 'what's your DC hot take??', because if you're gonna kick a hornet's nest, kick it with your best steel-toed boots and then smile:

Booster's queer. That man hasn't come across as straight-- ever. Like even when I started reading DC in 2003, he came across as queer to me, pretty much from his inception. Seriously. He comes across like someone closeted and decidedly not-straight who just stays in the closet initially because it was a very bad time to be anything other than heterosexual when he landed in the past and later because it's habit and expected of him. I don't think he's gay, I think he probably leans pretty pansexual or maybe even demisexual, but any which way, you'll never convince me he's not at least a little bit queer. He's had one in-universe romance that hasn't been retconned (Firehawk) in his entire time existing and one that was a joke and maybe not even real canon (Gladys). After almost four decades. His thing with Firehawk lasted, I think, like less than a year, too. I'm pretty sure you can count his on-panel kisses on one hand, but not more than two. He's never had a 'morning after' scene. The one seriously emotionally intimate relationship he has is with another guy. When he does flirt or attempt to, it comes off as being awkward and a bit desperate and a bit like a man who is kinda using it as cover. And like-- that really makes way more sense for him than anything otherwise. I'd sincerely hope by the 25th century that we'd stop giving a damn who loves or wants whomever else based on gender presentation. It also makes for a pretty compelling tale, a guy getting dropped into the middle of the AIDS epidemic learning a very quick and ugly lesson about what happens to queer folk in this time period. I dunno how hot a take this is, though, because at least some people up top agree (he's canonically hooked up with Ted in Teen Titans Go! and like-- any time Tom Taylor writes them, he all but says it aloud), but if TPTB were brave, they'd finally confirm it mainline. Like you don't even have to ship him with Ted (though that's my preference), just confirm he's queer. Here's my essay. What's my grade? LOL!

--

Since it's relevant, tho, here's a few pieces I wrote from a long email back and forth (since us old people still do that) with another very long-time fan of his a couple weeks ago:

But anyway, to me, he acts about like how a kid who got dropped into the 80s during the height of the AIDS panic and rampant homophobia and the wholesale death of gay men might, especially if he were queer himself. I'd probably try to straight-wash myself, too, in his boots. (I remember that time period, if distantly. I didn't realize I was queer myself until I was well into my 20s, despite falling in very desperate and intense love with another girl when I was 12. I do remember being in high school when a boy was murdered for being queer by being tortured and left tied to a fence to die, though. It was that kind of world back then for people like us. In some places, it still is.) Still, where Booster fails at any hetero romance (oh god does he), he's so devoted to Ted that a big part of his second solo was dedicated to him either trying to save the man or actively mourning him. It's heartbreaking and amazing and really actually quite good stuff, from a literary POV. Whether DC meant it or not, somehow they managed to write one of the greatest love stories I've ever seen in a comic across most of twenty years, no kidding, and I've read a lot across a lot of companies, even back when I was a twelve year old girl and ridiculed for it. And not just a great queer love story, it's a great love story period. A person can make a credible argument for it being a one-sided -- romantic and therefore non-platonic -- love, but it's pretty hard to argue it's not a very intense one regardless.

And

I guess what I'm trying to say is: This is another read on him. And I think also a very valid one. He's one hell of an amazing character, I wish DC had handled him half as well post-Flashpoint than they did pre-Flashpoint, and I don't think a queer reading of him detracts anything from how amazing he is. If anything, I think it makes the older stuff several shades deeper (and so, so relatable, god), and I think if they decided to write him as explicitly queer now, not too many people would actually be all that surprised. With or without Ted. I can't really identify with Alan Scott, love him though I do, even though I can acknowledge that a generation of gay men likely could quite strongly. But I can identify with Booster Gold, who grew up poor and wrecked his future in part for love of family, who clawed his way out of poverty and fell back into it, who has brilliant and shining moments of courage and heart, and moments where he lands on his face, who was tough enough to survive a lot of shit but devastatingly vulnerable to exploitation, and who looks like a fellow queer kid who might've fallen for his best friend, but was surrounded by homophobia and hate and terror and buried that part of himself because the alternative might have been getting beaten and left tied to a fence to die.

[olderthannetfic]

You've encountered site changes over time as a fan elder, what do you make of Tumblr potentially being put out to pasture? Tumblr was my coming of age fan site, and im looking for advice to transition to the next thing with grace and less bitterness than I feel now.

--

Ahaha. God, you should have heard the howling about LJ. "Fandom is over!" "Never again shall we dwell in fandom's True Home!" etc.

Hell, this endless "only LJ was good" crap turns up in replies here on posts where I as OP have very clearly laid out why that's rose colored glasses nonsense and you can so make friends on tumblr, have a conversation on tumblr, etc.

I had my crabby phase about this during the transition from Yahoo Groups to LJ. A lot of the real olds had it over paper zines and the transition to the internet.

I don't know if reading these hilariously samey old posts would help. It does give perspective, I think.

--

As for what you should do, do what I did with Tumblr:

1.

Look around to identify the Next Thing fandom is going to camp out on.

It may take a few guesses and some time to figure this out. You will likely not be an early adopter. Fandom was well established here by the time I joined at the end of 2010. Of course, by now, all those 2009 and before accounts are long gone, but at the time, I was a n00b joining other people's space despite having been in fandom for ages.

2.

Don't expect to enjoy it

I didn't join tumblr because I liked it. In fact, I despised it. I kept right on despising it until a brief stint in Sherlock fandom, a fandom that was so active here at the time that I was able to finally see the good aspects of the site's structure and features.

This is the mistake a lot of people make. They give things a cursory try, don't enjoy them, and go "not for me", forgetting that the last site also had a steep learning curve that was either difficult or that they didn't notice because they were in a different phase of their life.

Bitterness and grief are, frankly, an inherent part of the process. You can try not to be a debbie downer in your public comments, but you can't just not feel those things during the awkward part of the transition. Sometimes, acting positive and cutting off excessively negative thoughts can make you feel less negative overall, but it doesn't happen immediately.

3.

Accept that feeling cranky and old is both a you problem and a state of mind, not a property of the new site

Relatedly, the way we remember fandom platform X feeling usually has more to do with us being in college with fandom friends down the hall or having discovered Our People for the first time or some other time when we had a lot of energy and positive emotions. Often, we were in the throes of a first or new fandom love too, probably for some megafandom that other people also cared about at the same time.

When fandom is leaving some site, there's a grieving process anyway, but we're also often in a worse part of our lives for starting new things. We're busy. We're tired. We're between fandoms. We feel like we already paid our dues to build up our community. Why should we have to start again?

But let me tell you, you always need to start again eventually. I go to a weekly vidders' zoom chat, and a lot of the people in there are old as balls, including Kandy, the person who invented vidding back in the 70s. She's a lot of decades and a few cancers in, and she had to relearn how to vid on a computer after transitioning from slideshows to VCR vidding back in the day. If bad health, platform changes, and dead friends were going to stop her, she'd be long gone.

It's like sharks: you stop swimming, you die.

This isn't just about fandom, obviously. It's about avoiding a midlife crisis and, later, about avoiding feeling emotionally geriatric even when your body is falling apart.

Change gets us all, but being mentally old is a choice. The real reason I gave tumblr such a try was that I had been so resistant to getting on LJ. I was 20. Even a year later, it was fucking embarrassing to have been a crotchety old hag as a college student. I promised myself I'd soldier through the next change instead of dragging my feet about it. And it totally worked in the end! But boy did it not make the transition any less unpleasant emotionally!

4.

Find your joy

As is obvious from the above, the vast majority of the problem is just emotions. Fandom has been on a million broken sites with shitty features. We go where the people are, regardless of whether it has the technological aspects we liked at the last place. The actual shape of that platform is largely irrelevant.

What does matter is whether we as an individual fan are still excited and happy about something. I was between fandoms recently and went looking around for BL series I hadn't watched yet. People kept suggesting things set in the present day with too-cheesy production values and too many banal schoolboys in modern day settings without even anything spicy going on. I realized that the BL/danmei scene wasn't really cutting it for me and I should go for production values and genre and non-canon ships. You probably scrolled annoyedly past the picspams that resulted.

(Of course, hilariously, someone has now shown me the trailer of Red Peafowl, so someone may be making BL that feels like it's for me after all. Look at all that badwrong and very dark color grading.)

When you're in a good place emotionally, it's a hell of a lot easier to weather any change, and when you have a new fandom, it's a lot easier to connect with other fans.

A lot of people wait around for lightning to strike twice. They found their first fandom by accident, and they expect it to happen seamlessly again. For me, it's far more productive to brute force it: collect up a big list of what's popular or what's new and go through it till you find things you might like, then try them all.

And part of this, obviously, is not waiting for other fans to make the party happen. The more you need to join something other people are already doing, the less choice you'll have in fandoms or in platforms. If you aren't picky and just go where the tropey longfic is, that can work, but even then, favorite authors disappear or go to fandoms you hate and former megafandoms dry up. If you're the one bringing the party, it's a lot easier to find a new fandom or platform or community to have fun in.

[goddessofmischief]

Hey, thanks for tagging :) I am 34, so the "old men" are not so old to me and quite frankly, watching Shanks, Buggy and Mihawk in OPLA is feeling like coming home to old friends back from 20 years ago. (I was crushing on Shanks and Buggy so much...😅) So I thought, maybe you could write something where fem!reader already knows them and has a soft spot for each of them, since back when they were flirting and making fun when they were young. Now as adults they meet again and the chemistry is still there.

I remember one of my stories from back then. I was jealous of mermaids, because all the pirates got stupid once they're around, and a drunk Shanks said: "nah, you wouldn't like to be one; You'd be missing slamming doors and Buggy would drown on daily basis just to say hi-." Both Buggy and Reader: "shut up! So not true!". Just like young stupids are... :)

Anyways, thanks for your writing and I can't wait to read more about the "get-shit-done"-squad Mihawk, Shanks and Buggy

     — MERMAIDS (YOUNG SHANKS X READER, YOUNG BUGGY X READER)

A/N: Hope this is alright: since your formal request was so in line with what the theme of the series will be anyway, I used the excerpt of your line as basis for this particular fic. All credit of course goes to you for coming up with the lines and the idea. On a personal note, I just want to say how much I respect that you were an OG fic writer and still have interest in and love for these characters. Welcome home.

...

You would have believed that you had been at sea for years, until Buggy reminded you that it had only been weeks.

Granted, this is how he reminded you:

"It's been wee-eks," Buggy whined, stretching out on his hammock. Shanks was collapsed against the wall, fingers knotted together, eyes not really focused on any particular place.

And you? You were lying on the floor, gazing up at the wooden ceiling, wondering if it would be a good idea to leave the cabin and see the stars.

Being on the ship for weeks was highly irregular for your crew. Great captain he was, Roger knew he could only keep this ragtag group sane if they stepped onto shore and ate an orange every once in awhile. This concern was triply inflated by the fact that he had three young adults onboard who became very antsy if they had to stay in one place for too long. Your patience certainly rivaled Buggy's or even Shanks', but even you had your limit, and you had met it long ago.

The ship would have planned to make port nearly a week before, but the World Government was closer to finding you than ever. It was simply too dangerous.

You soon learned how your friends reacted to a situation such as this. Shanks had retreated mostly into silence, with exception of the odd joke or attempt at conversation, and Buggy had decided he blamed you both somehow for this situation and that any words exchanged with either of you would only be of the complaining nature.

"I know, Bugs," said Shanks, and you were surprised to hear him answer Buggy's complaint. You exchanged glances with him, then turned back to Buggy.

"Let's go outside, yeah?" you suggested. "Do something fun."

"Everyone's outside," Buggy complained. "They've been yelling over something for hours."

"And you didn't think that was important to mention, Bugs?" Shanks asked, irritably. Buggy shrugged.

...

The thing that had sparked such interest in the crew was simply that, as your ship had sailed very far into the deepest waters, much farther than usual, you had sailed into a home of mermaids. Extremely dangerous, and the crew knew it.

It did not negate their interest whatsoever, though.

Pirates get stupid when mermaids are around. It is a core trait of pirates and no less than a sacred tenet of piracy itself. More than a few decent men have been seduced to the sea by the very concept of mermaids, and to that end, the idea of finding one.

Shanks and Buggy were no exception.

You had never really taken the care to notice how they behaved with girls. Their flirting was of no interest to you, and so you didn't bother to surveil it. But it came to your attention now that they had terribly different styles: namely, that Buggy was mostly content to sit and watch from the edge of the deck, and Shanks was more interested in yelling, waving, and nearly falling off the boat.

Granted, by this time, alcohol had become involved, and all bets were off.

Despite all the excitement, the first in weeks, Shanks had begun to notice how quiet you'd become. He approached you, somewhat cautiously, hoping you wouldn't react with a retort or a threat.

"You okay?"

You nodded, staring at the drink you held.

"You sure?"

You shrugged, whispering something under your breath that Shanks struggled to hear.

"What's that?"

You spoke again, slightly more than a whisper, but Shanks heard it all the same.

"...I wish I was a mermaid."

"You wish you were a mermaid?" He repeated loudly, almost outraged. You shushed him, and he just laughed.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's just... nah, you wouldn't like to be one. You'd be missing... slamming doors, and Buggy would drown himself on a daily basis just to say hi-"

"Shut up!" you giggled. "So not true!"

"And then, of course, there'd be all the pirates. I wouldn't like sharing you with them."

"I'm a pirate. You're a pirate."

"I'm a different sort of pirate. And you're barely a pirate at all."

You shrank back, inexplicably hurt by Shanks' drunken offhand insult.

"I'm as much of a pirate as you."

"Of course you are. I didn't mean that. Not like that. I mean, you're just... you're very careful, you're much too good for us. You're not messy or mean like the rest of us are."

"What do you think I am, then?"

"A princess," he blurted out, and you tried not to laugh. "I've always thought so."

"Always?"

"Mhm. The whole time."

You studied Shanks' face, seeing him in a new light that you'd never glimpsed anyone in before. Had he always been this cute, or charming, or kind?

Well, it didn't matter if he always had been, because he was now, and before you had given much thought to it at all you were pushing his straw hat back and he was meeting your lips in a kiss, your first, his first.

"You're a terribly nice pirate," you mumbled.

"You're a terribly beautiful princess," he replied.

You both parted awkwardly, staring at each other with confused half-smiles and resigning to focusing your attentions back on the ocean. For now, it was merely a strange evening, a shooting star, but later on, you would remember that night as the precise moment you began to love Red-Haired Shanks.

And Buggy, watching from across the ship, would remember that night as the second time a deep knot of resentment grew in his chest, one that would only become larger with time. The first time had been as a child, when Shanks had done something exceptionally well where Buggy had failed, and Roger placed his famous straw hat onto his head.

The second time was tonight, because of you.

taglist: @sawendel @twinklesnake

[yuri-is-online]

Hey, remember the soulmate au by tiyoin(?) I recently read your post abt idia and Leona reacting to yuu being their mates, but I wanna take it a step further since I saw idias line abt the family curse (this has yandere implications so if it's not your cup of tea please feel free to just ignore, nothing is outright mentioned tho)

What if yuu has a family curse similar to the aishi family in yandere simulator? (It's been years since I touched the game so if the lore changed I'm basing it off of 2018 ish lore, just with my own twist) basically yes, yuu CAN feel emotions, they're just muted and barely there. Given the right conditions (like falling in love or spending time with friends) and/or antidepressants they'll basically be like any other person, without them it's like a less severe version of the aishi women pre-falling in love

So, afab ppl born in yuus family, once falling in love, start losing their sanities and adopt yandere like behavior (stalking, increasing rage and jealousy, willingness to murder, etc) unfortunately this means they usually die young (20s or 30s) how quickly/young they die is based on their willpower (resisting the urges) and when/if they fall in love (so someone falling in love for the first time in their 40s and having insane willpower, caving in 20 years later in their 60s has more luck than a 16 year old falling in love and caving in almost immediately). Unfortunately everyone is a carrier, men carry the gene and can pass it to their daughters, but it only presents in the women/afab ppl, so transfems won't be affected but transmascs will.

What if yuu fell in love already (in their own world) and has just been doing a really REALLY good job at Resisting The Urges™️. Like, sometimes they slip up and cave in to anger or get ridiculously jealous, but they try their hardest to tamp down the feelings. Yuu has sworn off falling in love (again) and has given up their dream of having a big family bc of the curse, they're even distancing themselves from their object of affection in an attempt to "be normal again" at the cost of their own sanity.

So yuu gets transported to twst, and without their darling, they have the chance to be normal again, assuming they can get past the initial panic frenzy. Then the soul bond is revealed and they just go "nope. Not this shit again" and spouts cryptic messages about a family curse and swearing off love. I'm pretty sure most of the boys would feel a bit hurt by that lmao

This is mostly made for idia since his segment is what sparked the idea in the first place, but which characters from most to least likely do you think would try to pursue mc and figure out the truth to leave them alone and try to move on? I personally can't see someone like kalim giving up on both but I think the octatrio would try to look for the truth but be 50/50 on pursuing yuu or dropping them like a hot potato. Idia I think would try to relate to yuu and try to pursue them, but I think he'd probably be a bit put off once yuu starts dropping hints about the curse (he's a weeb so it won't take long for him and maybe Ortho to put 2+2 together and figure out the curse)

tiyon's soulmate au can be found here, their first post inspired some asks, which led to my own soulbound au the rules of which can be found here. Please support tiyon and interact with their soulmate au! They're a very creative blog and deserve the attention~ give them some reblogs!

so. uh. I got this ask when I first woke up and 1) very happy to hear from you Rose, always lovely to get a new ask and 2) yandere? sim? has lore? I did not think people actually played the game? help. i've fallen and misplaced my life alert. As a rule I don't really write for a Yuu who is just x character from y game/anime (it is in my rules) so while I was at work realizing I might be old I was trying to think of a way to do this that wasn't just yan sim (I wanted something properly gn) and I think I've got something? I am currently beating away the desire to info dump on you about the myth of Sigurd and Brunhilde (i could scream about that for hours oh god oh please i have written an actual au for that but efkjbekjrgbjrthnytrh) So here is the basic idea:

Yuu ran afoul of a witch in their world and was appropriately cursed. Given the myth I was inspired by I don't think Yuu did anything bad, but they still made the witch mad so they got cursed to lose all reason should they ever fall in love.

"You will be thine own destruction!" Cackles the witch and Yuu, who is actually normal unlike trey this person takes a deep breath and resigns themselves to researching a way to minimize the effects and maybe break it? They don't know they thought magic was fake until they thought they were just doing a favor for someone but turns out they pissed off Baba fucking Yaga.

They start to isolate themselves since they notice the curse starting to eat at them when they are around anyone the love; they consider going back to the witch and asking for further clarification but they can't seem to find them anywhere so they take some deep breaths and do their best to just be normal.

When they end up in Twisted Wonderland, and start feeling... weird. And it only gets worse when Crowley speculates that they might have been brought to Twisted Wonderland because they posses a soulbond.

And Yuu immediately freaks out because they don't want to kill anyone.

Now as for your question for who would try to pursue Yuu vs just leave them... well I don't really like writing un reciprocated feelings so I hesitate to say any of the cast would drop Yuu. In my au it isn't possible for soulbonds to not be reciprocated, and they are already sort of seen as a curse by mages so this... complication might not be normal but it isn't unexpected if that makes sense. Which would probably make Yuu swearing off love hurt even worse.

Kalim wouldn't want to abandon Yuu. Not ever, no matter how much of a danger they could be to him. Hell, he's willing to forgive people who are trying to poison him on the off chance they might regret it. But he is the heir of House Al-Asim, and I could see his dad paying someone to take Yuu out to keep his son safe. Something Jamil sees coming from a mile away and has to just keep quiet about. Something I can see Jamil feeling bad about, he might not like Kalim but you didn't ask for anything that happened to you. And yet the Asim's took your life from you anyway.

Have to disagree about the octatrio just a bit. Floyd would be into this. And so would Jade. But especially Floyd, oh hee hee ha ha his soul mate wants to kill him? Say less he is on his way to get his ass eat beat with an engagement ring in hand. Both he and Jade would be a little disappointed when the curse is broken and you aren't actively trying to kill him anymore... maybe you could try and poison him huh? Like old times?

I wrote 20 paper pages of soulbond au stuff for Azul so I will try to be brief here but... I don't think this situation would be one that made him try to break the bond. He has... complicated feelings about soulbonds already. If anything I could see him thinking he deserves this.

Now Idia. He's complicated. Pre-overblot he has given up on the concept of breaking his own curse, and I could see him feeling the same way about yours. Ortho on the other hand... even before he gets his soul he wants to help. After the overblot I can see Idia pursuing Yuu determined to find the truth and save them. Not that he wouldn't interact with them before that, he's a bit nihilistic so I can see him just making a bunch of jokes about the situation or promising to let Yuu kill him "after this next round." Or just straight up asking them to when he has to hit pity in one of his gachas. It's just cringe enough that it snaps Yuu out of the curse fog for long enough for the two of them to be normal around each other. And by normal I mean incredibly awkward

Anyway that's all I've got. Thank you for the ask ♡

[artificial-transmutations]

Transformation Letter: Michael

Hey, I'm Michael, a 20 year old guy at a top university, but it's not exactly the experience I thought it would be and I just want a change. I'm just kinda an average looking guy with short brown hair, blue eyes and an unremarkable body, pretty average all round. I still wanna be a man at the end of this, being an object isn't exactly appealing to me.

Being accepted at a top university has always been a dream of yours, but boy didn't you anticipate how much work it was going to be. At first, the orientation phase had been pretty fun. But after the first semester was over, you realized just how hard the courses were. It was certainly no comparison to the school you went to before and sometimes you even found yourself envying the people that were in the normal degree program.

Still, you had a dedication to make the best of it and managed to stay in the top tier of your classes. That came at a cost, however. Your social life was pretty much non-existent. It was always late evening when you finished up studying and most of the time you were simply too tired to even think about partying or meeting friends.

You are at your desk now, surrounded by tons of books, and have just begun a new chapter, listening to some lo-fi music from your laptop to help you concentrate. It has been weeks now since you sent that letter to the shady internet company in a moment of weakness. Everything you wrote was true: You don't really hate the university, but it isn't at all how you imagined it to be: A relaxed and laid back episode of your life filled with friends and parties. Everything in you longs for a change, but your ambition keeps you on track.

Still, you normally wouldn't express these thoughts to a stranger like that, and you don't really know why you decided to write the letter in the end. Regardless, it has been weeks now and you doubt there will be any kind of answer. Perhaps the company has gone out of business or has never existed to begin with.

You turn the page of your textbook, looking sighingly at yet another page filled with formulas when suddenly the music coming from your laptop changes.

Where before it has been more of a rhythmic lo-fi noise, the track that just began to play is clearly a pop song, something you have heard at the radio before. You frown. Perhaps Dotify has reached the end of your playlist and has entered that arcane mode with 'recommendations'. You always wondered how in the world the algorithm choses those, as they more often than not have nothing in common with the previous playlist.

You reach over to your laptop to change the music back, but you stop in your tracks. Even though you're not exactly a fan of pop songs, it is quite a catchy tune, so you let it play.

You quickly realize, however, that it's distracting you from your lecture. After you have read the same formula twice over, you lay down the book. Perhaps it’s time for a short break. You lean back in your chair and close your eyes for a moment, rubbing your temples and just listen to the music, trying to recollect what you've learned so far in this session.

However, the more you try to remember and connect the dots, the less you feel like you understand the subject at all. It's like whenever you try to concentrate on a connection you have already made, the cheery tune invades your mind and snaps it in two. The whole thing is just two complicated, beyond your mental reach. You feel dumb admitting that, but perhaps you have to start being honest to yourself. You're just not that bright, and it has probably been a mistake trying to pretend you were and enrolling in this university.

The song ends and a new one begins. This one is more powerful, rock music from the 80s or 90s. It is surprisingly relaxing to just admit defeat, and you open your eyes again, leaning back in your chair, arms crossed behind your head. For a good few seconds, you just stare at the pile of books in front of you before you notice something is off. There's a faint smell of... sweat? Following it with your head, you notice your armpits. You are smelling your own sweat and somehow it is not unpleasant at all.

Additionally, however, you can see that your pits are filled with a generous bush of hair - which is something new for you entirely. You normally don't have any body hair to speak of. Curiously, you take a closer look and sniff, try to pull on them - but the pit hair is clearly here and clearly yours. Weird!

You scratch your chin and are surprised when your hand meets stubble. You have definitely been smooth just a few moments ago. Yet, the bristly texture feels good under your hand. You rub your cheeks, where your facial hair seems to be even denser and smile. It's the kind of manly and mature look that you have always dreamed about, even though it is somewhat unexpected. It's a bit sad that you don't have a mirror, but you can feel it with your hand just fine as the beat of the music continues.

You get up from the chair, stretch your limbs and feel a weird pressure in your crotch. As you look down, you notice that your dick is pressing hard against the fabric of your pants. It's hardly surprising, with the weird changes going on to your body! You wonder...

Sheepishly, you slip out of your shirt and are rewarded with a pretty alien sight: Not only is your chest covered in short dark hair, it is also much more impressive than what you're used to. In fact, there is visible definition, not only in your chest but also in your abs where a thick treasure trail of hairs disappears into your pants. But not only your torso is changed. You can practically watch as with every beat, another pulse goes through your body, adding a bit of manliness, a bit of muscle here and there. Your biceps bulge out as if you work out regularly and even your legs gain a bit of definition.

The music keeps playing, and so do the changes. You are no longer the skinny, nerd boy who struggles with calculus. No, you are a real man, a guy that knows his way around a gym, a guy that is respected by other people. You are not only a man, however, you are a real fine specimen of man, with a powerful aura, a confident smile and a dick that is so hard that it could cut diamonds.

When the next track begins playing, you have to smile. You know that song! It's metal, of course, heavy metal. Your fingers begin to drum on the desk as your body changes further. Now, not only does the hair spread further, it also becomes a bit longer, more shaggy. Even more intelligence flees your eyes as they change from the bright blue to a dull brown, but you don't care. You are going with the rhythm of the music, let yourself being carried by it. Every time you hit the wood of your desk, your motions become more precise and more powerful, the bangs louder and exactly on point. Your muscles bulge out, and the smile on your face widens, until you are full-on grinning.

You don't need any books, any lectures, or anything else anymore. The music is the only thing that is important. As you give yourself over to the rhythm, something important changes. No longer is the beat carrying you, you are carrying the beat. Around you, reality changes as the desk and books dissolve, giving way to an expensive drum kit in front of you. Your clothing melts away until you are only wearing a pair of black leather shorts filled to the brim with your erect cock. You know you're in public but you're too dumb, too careless and most of all too manly to care. Let them see your erection bulge! Your powerful arms bring down the drumsticks with force while the rest of your mates play other instruments, and the frontman shouts the song's lyrics into the microphone. Sweat covers your face and your chest, your hair sticks to your forehead as you put every ounce of strength you can muster into producing the loudest beats possible. You can see the crowd going wild through the light of the stage and a feeling of power surges through you, causing your cock to leak a bit of precum into the front of your shorts.

You're no longer a student, and you're no longer a wimp. You are the drum-man of a heavy metal band, and people love you. They adore you, the way your muscles shine with sweat, the way the drums bang out their beat and the way you seem so happy and carefree, as dumb as a brick.

Wow, I think Michael definitely changed for the better here - and all because of a half-forgotten letter. What do you think, does this body suit him better now?

Over at my riot page (just a tip jar!), you can find a few different versions of Michael.

[xn3city]

And finally: the one I've been waiting for, the young man whose face leapt into my mind's eye when I read @romanceyourdemons's wonderful idea about SVSSS as an American nineties TV series and led me to draw all this, your blorbo and mine: Winter Mississippi, and the useless fake silver crucifix his adoptive mother gave him.

And yes, his cutie mark is an inverted cross. He's a demon!

Notes on the supporting cast:

Pablo Escobar was still kicking around in the early nineties, and I knew I wanted the Heavenly Demons to be narcos, in conflict with the USA armed force cultivators. Huan Hua Palace's shady vibe works especially well with the CIA.

"Old Palace Master" is actually a great spy handler codename, but I was not about to give a black character a boss called "Master." I mean, you could do it in a fic. I can think of three authors just off the top of my head who I would trust to sensitively explore the hideous resonance that would give to the way Su Xiyan was abused and exploited by the OPM. But I'm not a good writer with a lot of prose to work with, I'm just a mid artist with one panel and most of it is taken up by a horny joke. I just said no.

My favorite joke in this whole thing is that the Heavenly Demons are named Jesus and Lover-of-God.

Tried to capture that devoted gege-spitting wet cat dynamic between YQY and the Original Goods.

Shen Yuan pre-novel is such a cipher. I understand that the general consensus is that he died at about around 20, but…that's not the impression I got when I read SVSSS, actually. I get it now, but when he says something about not having gotten laid for twenty years: to be honest, I read that, and assumed he was, you know, 35 minimum, and having the mother of all dry spells.

And I think it makes the story better. A twenty year old wasting his time in his mom's basement reading crap webnovels and yelling on the forums: that's just a kid having a less than maximally productive gap year! He might well have had a stellar career of his own in real life eventually! It's not super surprising that he blossomed on Qing Jing Peak! But a thirty-five year old incel NEET angrily posting in that basement….that's a man who has had something go wrong in his life. I'm not saying you can't turn it around at thirty-five, you absolutely can, but I tell you: it's harder. Something is wrong, mentally or physically or both, and in a way that leaves a mark. Fifteen years are gone. Opportunites have passed that will not return. For that guy to be handed the responsibility of Shen Qingqiu's life, and do such a goddamn virtuoso job of turning it around: that is some bestselling-loveseat-level portrayal of how a different context could pull radically different capabilities out of a person. That makes SVSSS just as much about how the PIDW!world transformed Shen Yuan, and for the better, as it is about how Shen Yuan transformed Luo Binghe and his world. And that's a better story.

It does make the relationship age gap more disturbing - but if you weren't here for disturbing relationships, what are you doing reading SVSSS?

The cell phones are of course terribly anachronistic, but here's the thing - there is no equivalent, and there's no story without it. There is no Peerless Cucumber yelling at the frustrated PIDW author for hacking out the 6000th boring papapa scene, without creators being financially dependent on direct contact and support from their fans in a way that just didn't exist in the nineties. I remember how novel and exciting it was that J. Michael Straczynski hung out on rec.arts.sf.tv.babylon5; he absolutely did not have to. Eventually I decided that The Demon Heart of Winter Mississippi was, somehow, a nineties TV show about the 2010s, and everyone could have their phones. You know Minnie Liu is writing RPF on hers.

In case any of these weren't clear:

Demon Heart = Xin Mo Winter Mississippi = Luo Binghe (from @romanceyourdemons) "Don" Teófilo Lanza = Tianlang-Jun Chucho Lanza = Zhuzhi-Lang Sue Sheehan = Su Xiyan Codename: OPM = Old Palace Master Saul Czerniak = Shang Qinghua Wally Shen = Shen Yuan/Shen Qingqiu Julius Shen = Shen Jiu/Shen Qingqiu Adam Montague = Yue Qingyuan Helmut von Nordwüste = Mobei-Jun (from @romanceyourdemons) Shelley Howe = Sha Hualing Minnie Liu = Liu Mingyan Max Liu = Liu Qingge Néné Young = Ning Yingying Michael Ventola = Ming Fan

Fun game: guess whose likenesses I used for reference for all these characters!