#Monty Wilders

[mottokuro]

“what’s your favourite Depeche Mode song?” - me:

[rainingmusic]

Recoil - Breath Control

[cantsayidont]

BLUEBEARD'S EIGHTH WIFE (1938): Frustratingly clumsy Ernst Lubitsch romantic comedy starring Gary Cooper as an oft-married American millionaire who falls for an opportunistic Frenchwoman (Claudette Colbert), who really just wants to marry and divorce him as quickly as possible so she can start collecting his fat alimony checks and thereby revive the fortunes of her broke marquis father (Edward Everett Horton). With this cast, a Billy Wilder/Charles Brackett script, and the famed Lubitsch Touch, it seems like it ought to be a winner, but it's sunk by a disastrous lack of narrative direction and various unwelcome lapses in taste.

There are some very funny bits and an assortment of memorable throwaway lines, but the story lurches and lumbers, the main characters are unsympathetic in ways that aren't very funny, and Wilder and Brackett seem to have assumed that domestic violence was inherently hilarious. (In one particularly disagreeable scene, the Colbert character drunkenly urges her husband to kiss her, only to reveal that she's deliberately just eaten a handful of raw onions, to which she knows he's deathly allergic; he responds by threatening, with disconcerting seriousness, to murder her in her hotel suite, an escalation that's apparently intended to compensate for the lack of any actual punchline.) Cooper seems badly out of his depth, alternating between stoic stiffness and clumsy mugging, which means he's constantly being upstaged by the supporting cast (in particular Horton, who steals every scene he's in without apparent effort). There are some great pieces scattered throughout BLUEBEARD'S, but when it's bad, which it too often is, it's dreadful — one of the worst films from one of the world's great comedy directors.

MIDNIGHT (1939): Less than a year after BLUEBEARD'S EIGHTH WIFE, Wilder and Brackett redeemed themselves with this sparkling CINDERELLA variation, directed by Mitchell Leisen. Again set in Paris, it also stars Colbert, who's in rare form as Eve Peabody, a gold-digging American chorine who masquerades as a Hungarian baroness with the aid of a wealthy fairy godfather (John Barrymore) who wants her to deflect the interest of a suave playboy (Francis Lederer) who's been making time with his beloved wife (Mary Astor). This is complicated by the arrival of the handsome Hungarian-born taxi driver (Don Ameche) whose name Eve has borrowed, who's been looking for her all over the city since she ghosted him.

Using CINDERELLA as a framework gives MIDNIGHT the structure BLUEBEARD'S desperately needed, and the fluidity with which the story's various complications unfold is a delight. Better still, Leisen brings out the best in a mostly superlative cast — just watching their expressions is a lot of fun — and gives the proceedings the air of Lubitschian wit and sophistication that Lubitsch himself had recently failed to deliver. MIDNIGHT does stumble a bit at the end, with the final scenes (featuring Monty Woolley as an irrascible judge) succumbing to the heavy-handed mugging the rest of the film had mostly resisted, but it's not bad enough to sour the stew. As a result, MIDNIGHT is at least in the 85th percentile of screwball comedies, able to stand comparison with better-known classics of the genre.

[laurent-bigot]

L'HUMOUR ANGLO-SAXON DANS LES ANNÉES 70

Tandis que les Monty Python faisaient une apparition fracassante en Angleterre, la comédie américaine connaissait un renouvellement très important avec des cinéastes irrespectueux formés à l’école de Broadway. Frankenstein Junior – Mel Brooks (1974) Le début des années 70 semble avoir marqué une nette rupture avec la tradition comique hollywoodienne, la plupart des acteurs et des réalisateurs…

[windforestsso]

OC map 2024!

It was not long ago since Valedale been updated and it shows. Many OCs have moved there.

I have not included OCs from the old map as I didnt have access to the old file and I dont want to jump between multiple posts to get names and photos because that was just too confusing. I have done a google doc list with the Ocs so next update will be easier. But even if I didnt include OCs from the old post, we went from 73 to 95 Ocs, the population is growing.

I will not update this untill a new area been updated or added. But if anyone sees spell mistakes or wrong infomation given for ocs I can edit that. But I will not fix the map pic.

Address book is under line:

Central Jorvik:

Jorvik city:

Breasha Keane - Somewhere by Leonardos Lottie Emberwoods - Lives in Governors fall, she have no horses. Have a twin in South Hoof, Charlie Mary-Ann - lives close to Leonardos

Crater of Jor:

Alexei Sparrowhawk - lives in the mountain between Wildwoods and Dino Valley Sora Sparrowhawk - Kallter witch in dino valley searching

Firgrove:

Moa Windforest - Hidden shack in the forest  Ryland - lives at the ranger station

Firgrove Village:

Adelaide “Swift” Swiftheart - A kalter from Icengate lives near Firgrove Alexis Carolina Nightjar Elaina Hawkwatcher - Lives with her grandmother Luca Goldstone - Wilderness enthusiast. Big brother to Max in Tailtop village

Starshine Ranch:

Athena Rockstorm - Calamity Claymore - Charlie Emberwoods protoge, soul rider and chaos child. Have a big brother, Kit, in Cape West Fishing Village Daine Dusty Claymore - A retired cowboy. Uncle to Calamity and Kit Claymore Rora Dolphinheart -

Goldenhills Valley:

William Ravenyour - haunts the hayloft on Goldenleaf Stables (belongs to Dakota Ravenyour) Willow Crazytree - (no photo)

Cape West Fishing Village:

Adriana Braveheart Bella Highgirl - Officially owns a house here but has a second home in Avalon’s Meader where she stays under busy soul rider/druid times. Used to hop from hotel to hotel. Cody Hunter Doveshovel - Rents a bed with the Jorvik Fishing Club, but travels frequently for work and soul rider shenanigans. Kit Claymore - A fisherman and Amnesiac. big brother to Calamity in Starshine Ranch

Harvest Counties:

Crescent Moon:

Feya Elfchild - Lives alone

Jarlaheim:

Alyssa Evelyn - Lives close to the rocker hairstyles shop Everlee Songbird - lives with a roommate thats also a member of the keepers Iris- Neightbour to Linda. Frequently visits the family in Cape West Fishing Village Johann - Lives in the northern part of Jarlaheim. Joins Ruth on adventures often Lucy Flowerhill - Lives with Linda Niko Northlight- lives in an apartment Riley Wolfstorm Selena - Lives by the vet Yasmine Westbank -

Jorvik Stables:

Amira Monsave - 19 year old, rents a room. In jorvik to look for Anne Arya Mistwood - 24 year old, works and lives at Baroness’ racetrack but because of renovations she currently lives with their half sister, Shilo, in Jovik Stables Brook - Lives behind the white double doors Monty Lionheart - A fancy lad just vibing Shilo Stormfire - 18 Year old, dorming at the stables during the summer to train and compete with her Lipizzaner, Glory. Currently have her half-sister Arya Mistwood as a roommate

New Hillcrest:

Blake Silvercrest - lives in the stables Lucas Roni - Lives with her two dogs Opal and Potato. She works as a waitress in the local café during the day

Mistfall:

Dundull:

Azalea “Az” - lives around Dundull and work as a ranger Bodhi Applewright - Charlie Emberwoods protoge, soul rider and wanderer. Big brother to Toby in Redwoods Vendela Zoe Silverborn - lives alone

Wildwoods:

Astrid - precise location of home is unknown Heather - Sleeps in the hayloft of the stables in Redwood Point Max Goldstone -Charlies protoge, soul rider & adventurer. Have a big brother, Luca in Firgrove Rachel - Redwood Point Ranger Station Toby Applewrights - A junior ranger. Little brother to Bodhi in Dundull

North of Northern Mountains:

Donna Buttergood

Silverglade:

Alina - lives in the field between Silverglade Manor and Nilmer’s highland

Fort Pinta:

Esther Darkdragon - 26 year old, lives with Svea Darkdragon in an apartment Morgan Saltcrest - Pirate in the sea outside of the Fort Pinta Rose - Svea Darkdragon - 24 year old, lives together with Esther Darkdragon in an apartment

Moorland Stables:

Esther Northberg - lives in the hay loft above the stables Jamie Nightlock - A baby doing his best Kit Applewood -21 year old, lives with Mrs. Holdsworth, thinking of getting a small place in Valedale Montana

Silverglade Manor:

Nahla Wolfwalker - Half kalter on a quest

Silverglade Village:

Adelaide Odenburg - Lives in the pink house in the circle with two others Amelie Emberwoods - Lives at Steves farm as a riding camp instructor. Is cousin to Charlie and Lottie Emberwoods Athena Peacecry - Lives with her parents Aurora Bellavance - rents a room, wants to move to Firgrove or Goldenhills one day Ava - Recently moved to the north side of town, close to the championship Lady - Lives with Big Bonney

South Hoof Peninsula:

Ines - Lives in the cottage south of the Rescue Ranch

South Hoof Rescue Ranch:

Charlie Emberwoods - Work as a rehabilitator, have a twin in Governors fall, Lottie. Juni - travels a lot Vilda Ravenhill - Accidently roommate with Hugh Wynonna - Rents a room

Valedale:

Hollowwoods:

Damian - Lives with his family

Silversong River:

Rowan Riverborn - she a näck chills as a horse and is a danger to children Zelda Krüger - 22 year old, rents a room in Avalon’s Meander

Valedale Village:

Corinne Eaglebridge - Lives alone Evangeline Bitterhouse - A druid in-training. little sister to Genevieve Genevieve Bitterhouse - Charlie Emberwoods Protege, soul rider and a nature witch. Big sister to Evangeline Halo Starborn Joseph - had an apartment in Fort Pinta but let the lease run out Kelly Nightborn Lexa - Moved to Valedale Village after she used to live with her family in Moorland Marie - Lives in a house next door to Avalons Renata Rose Riverlee - Is a Pandorian hunting for someone, lives in valedale when not in Pandoria Sadie Algren - Take cares of horses at the village stables while their owner is away, travels to pandora to study flora and fauna Sora

Homeless:

Alou - contantly traveling with other shopkeepers on the Southern Jorvik event circuit Juli - Either in Pandoria or traveling, he supposed to live in south hoof but wont stay there. Ruth - drifter, can be seen more frequently around Jarlaheim and Greendale

[reynoldssgf]

SOMEONE PLEASE WRITE RYAN'S UNDERRATED CHARACTERS X READER

Van Wilder

Monty from Waiting...

Just Friends

The Amityville Horror

The Change-Up, The Proposal, Definitely Maybe etc.

HE IS SO FINE

Also just Ryan himself x ready would be perfect!!!

[lulublack90]

Prompt 21 - Ancient Greece

@wolfstarmicrofic August 21, word count 940

This is the last part of the Apple Core Series from a Wolfstar POV. There will be a part three starting next month where I am going to write my first Rosekiller. Hope you've all enjoyed the story so far.

Previous part First Jegulus part

Everyone was in on Monday. Effie had insisted and, as usual, she got her way. But Regulus had called in a few friends for the occasion as well. 

“Who are they and why are they in my kitchen?” Sirius asked his brother with a sceptical look on his face as he took in the two men and the tiny elf-like woman with a ridiculous amount of floaty hair, standing just inside the door. 

“These insane people are your personal protection unit. The second Wormtail steps foot in the café, they will be on him. Have you ever seen a lion lake down a wilder beast? That’s them.” Regulus smiled proudly as he gestured to his friends. 

“That’s really kind of you to volunteer them, Reggie, but you do know that we’re just going to ban him and not kill him, right?”

“Aw, take all the fun out of it, why don’t you,” The one he thought was Barty sulked. 

“Don’t worry, babe, you can stab me in bed tonight,” Evan purred in his ear loud enough for them all to hear. 

“I think I’m about to have a stroke,” Sirius groaned, dropping his head into his hand. 

“I can smell burning toast,” Pandora piped up, sniffing the surrounding air.

“Shit!” Sirius spun around, pulled the burnt toasties from the machines and tossed them straight into the bin.  

“Don’t worry, it’ll be fine,” Regulus patted Sirius’s arm. “They’ll scare him just enough so that he never comes back.”

“Fine. Now get out of my kitchen, I have toasties to create!”

 ***

It didn’t take long for Wormtail to turn up. He waltzed in as though nothing was amiss, not that he knew it was, and sat at his usual table. He opened the menu, blocking his view in front of him, and began reading. That’s when Barty and Evan pounced. 

“Hello,” Evan said, his voice smooth as velvet. Wormtail jumped and dropped his menu. 

“Oh, er, hi. Erm, I don’t really like sharing a table, if, if you don’t mind,” He squeaked nervously as Barty picked up the fork from in front of him and twirled it in his fingers. 

“Well, we don’t like little rats who film our friends,” Barty said in an over-calm way. His smile was just a bit too toothy. Even Sirius felt unnerved from his viewpoint. 

Two chairs dragged across the floor and stopped beside the table. Effie and Monty sat down, looking all polite. 

“And we don’t appreciate our son’s being used for your entertainment,” Effie hissed. Barty looked at her impressed. Sirius felt like there’d be another handful of strays added to their family by the end of this. 

“What she said,” Monty said cheerfully as he leaned back in his chair, his eyes never leaving Wormtail. 

“Peter?” Pandora appeared out of nowhere. “Peter Pettigrew, is that you?” She gasped. “Oh, haven’t you been naughty? I’ve a good mind to tell your mother on you. Using my dear friend Sirius to get views online. That’s not very nice, you know,” She chastised him. 

Two more chairs joined the group. 

“The only one who can torture my brother is me,” Regulus sneered. "The fact you think you have the right to film him at all is beyond me." 

“Dickhead,” James shot at him. 

“James Fleamont Potter, language,” Effie gasped. 

“Sorry, Mum,” James flushed and tried again. “You hurt my friend, prepare to di—” Monty elbowed his son in the ribs, “Have a good telling off,” He huffed. 

Remus took Sirius’s hand and led him over to the table. 

"It gives me great pleasure, Mr Pettigrew, to inform you--” Remus said too sweetly. 

“Sling your hook, you're barred!” Sirius shouted at the cowering man. Wormtail jumped to his feet and ran for the door.   

Then, like some film about Ancient Greece, they all charged down the giant rat, yelling and screaming after him. Sirius brandishing his toastie tongs and Remus throwing coffee cup lids like discuses, as Peter Pettigrew scurried down the road as fast as his short legs could carry him and disappeared around the corner out of sight. 

“I got it all on film! I got it all on film!” Effie cried out excitedly. 

“So did I,” Monty grinned wildly. “Oh, wait,” His face fell. “I had it on the wrong camera. It’s just my face.”

“So who’s watching the café?” James asked once they were done cheering and laughing at Monty. 

“Oh shit!” Sirius yelled and raced back to the unmanned café.

They went back to serving their customers as if nothing had happened. Sirius couldn't believe how lucky he was to have so many people who cared about him like his chosen family did. Remus came up behind him and wrapped him in a hug. Sirius turned his face so he could kiss Remus on the lips. "I love these guys so much," He said, sighing happily as he watched them all chatting and laughing. 

"I love you," Remus whispered in his ear, making Sirius's knees go weak. 

"I love you too," He said, capturing Remus's lips with his own again. "Think Reggie would mind if we snuck off into his flat for a bit?" He asked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. 

"Yes he bloody would!" Regulus glared at them. "Mine." 

"Want a bet?" Sirius asked, but didn't wait for an answer as he dragged Remus out of the staff door with Regulus screaming bloody murder behind them.

He spun Remus around and kissed him properly. "Chinese for tea?"

"Yeah, go on then," Remus laughed, kissing him one more time before going back to his counter to take the orders of their waiting customers. 

[citadelofmythoughts]

So that RWBY Chibi replying in that link, huh? I think (key word: think) I can parse out some of what they're trying to get at since it seems to be common among aspects of the RWDE.

Specifically they seem to miss when RWBY was a dumb web cartoon doing dumb web cartoon stuff. Or at least when it appeared that way. It was equated to, say, B-Movies like by PM Entertainment where the thin plot is more about action set pieces to be enthralled by.

Seriously, for direct to video, those films had top notch stunt.

So when RWBY started having Volume 3 onwards delve into the wilder world the Beacon arc had only teased us with, many felt that the school days shenanegins with a side of dark conspiracies were being trampled on after they accepted it as the norm of the show.

It doesn't help that, whether well executed or not, the Haven arc took a character focus approach with spectacle battles taking a backseat. I might stan the Battle of Haven buuuuuuuut it's hard to deny that they put more focus on the character side of things. Even without Gray going behind their backs, some form of alienation was inevitable.

And THEN there's the whole Monty's Vision thing. Christ...

It's like a bitter ex-partner who cannot move on despite it being the more healthy option. They have to cling to their hate because it means "admitting defeat."

It's like they're mad that RWBY dared to try to be more than they thought it could or should be.

They were never the target audience because RWBY was never gonna stay the simple school hi-jinks show they seemed to want. It was foreshadowed pretty early on that things were going to change and that the girls would be sent off into the world.

If RWBY was ever going to grow, it had to be given the chance to be more than what the initial expectations were. For myself, if it had never progressed past Beacon, I wouldn't have even bothered.

The wider world, the experiences the characters have gone through, the happiness and the pain. Those are what attracted me to it.

The crap the haters want can be found in any number of shounen anime, it's nothing special.

[twins-write]

Request Information

We write x reader and x OC stories/oneshots, so don't be afraid to give your character a name, unless you prefer it being the reader!

We typically write the reader as a female, but if you prefer gender neutral, let us know!

We generally write for male people/characters as well.

We write:

Fluff

Angst

Hurt/Comfort

Comfort

We do not write smut!

Feel free to send any request for one-shots/imagines, or if you have an idea for a mini-series, don't be afraid to suggest that as well.

If you request, there is no 100% guarantee that it'll be written, but we will definitely try our best to fulfill everyone's requests!

When something is requested, we will try to get to it as quickly as possible, but we are both full time students and play sports, so please bear with us!

We write for a lot of things, but here is the list if you want to go through it all! If you don't see a specific person/show or anything on the list, still feel free to request it. We might have accidentally left it out, but if not, we can still attempt to write that person for you!

You can submit requests by clicking the link at the bottom of this post or the link at the top of the blog, both will take you to a form to submit your request!

FULL LIST OF WHAT WE WRITE FOR:

Shows/movies:

13 Reasons Why

Clay Jensen

Justin Foley

911 (Lonestar and the original)

Eddie Diaz

Evan Buckley

Judd Ryder

Owen Strand

Paul Strickland

TK Strand

Wyatt Harris

American Horror Story

Jimmy Darling

Kit Walker

Kyle Spencer

Michael Langdon

Tate Langdon

Xavier Plympton

Attack On Titan

Armin Arlert

Jean Kirstein

Big Time Rush

Carlos

James

Kendall

Logan

Breaking Bad

Jesse Pinkman

Cobra Kai

Eli Moskowitz (Hawk)

Johnny Lawrence

Miguel Diaz

Robby Keene

Criminal Minds

Aaron Hotchner

Derek Morgan

Spencer Reid

Game of Thrones

Bronn

Jaime Lannister

Jon Snow

Robb Stark

Goosebumps

James Etten

Lucas Parker

Gossip Girl

Chuck Bass

Eric Van Der Woodsen

Nate Archibald

Grey’s Anatomy

George O’Malley

Mark Sloan

IT

Bill Denbrough

Eddie Kaspbrak

Richie Tozier

Jujustu Kaisen

Megumi Fushiguro

Satoru Gojo

Toge Inumaki

Yuji Itadori

Lab Rats

Chase Davenport

Marvel

Bucky Barnes

Deadpool

Druig

Loki Laufeyson

Peter Parker (Tom’s or Andrew’s)

Steve Rogers

Thor 

Wolverine

My Babysitter’s a Vampire

Benny Weir

Ethan Morgan

My Hero Academia

Denki Kaminari

Eijiro Kirishima

Hitoshi Shinsou

Izuku Midoriya

Katsuki Bakugo

Keigo Takami

Shota Aizawa

Shoto Todoroki

Takami Amajiki

NCIS (LA and the original)

Anthony DiNozzo

Eric Beale

G. Callen

Jimmy Palmer

Marty Deeks

Timothy McGee

Nerve

Tommy Mancuso

New Girl

Coach

Nick Miller

Schmidt

Winston Bishop

Now You See Me

Jack Wilder

Outerbanks

JJ Maybank

John B.

Pope

Rafe Cameron

Topper

Percy Jackson

Percy

Pretty Little Liars

Caleb Rivers

Holden Strauss

Jason DiLaurentis

Mike Montgomery

Noel Kahn

Toby Cavanaugh

Shadowhunters

Alec Lightwood

Jace Herondale

Simon Lewis

Shameless

Ian Gallagher

Kevin Ball

Lip Gallagher

Smallville

Clark Kent

Lex Luthor

Stranger Things

Dustin Henderson

Steve Harrington

Supernatural

Castiel

Dean Winchester

Jack Kline

Sam Winchester

T@GGED

Ash Franklin

Brandon Darrow

Trevor Askill

Teen Wolf

Derek Hale

Isaac Lahey

Scott McCall

Stiles Stilinski

Titans

Dick Grayson (Nightwing)

Gar Logan (Beast Boy)

Jason Todd (Red Hood)

The 100

Bellamy Blake

Jasper Jordan

Monty Green

The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

Ambrose Spellman

Harvey Kinkle

Nicholas Scratch

The Hunger Games

Finnick Odair

Peeta Mellark

The Maze Runner

Minho

Newt

Thomas

The Middle

Axl Heck

Sean Donahue

The OC

Luke Ward

Ryan Atwood

Seth Cohen

The Originals

Elijah Mikaelson

Klaus Mikaelson

Kol Mikaelson

The Outsiders

Darry Curtis

Dallas Winston

Sodapop Curtis

The Rookie

John Nolan

Tim Bradford

The Umbrella Academy

Five Hargreeves

The Vampire Diaries

Damon Salvatore

Jeremy Gilbert

Kai Parker

Stefan Salvatore

The Walking Dead

Carl Grimes

Daryl Dixon

Glenn Rhee

Negan Smith

Rick Grimes

True Blood

Eric Northman

Jason Stackhouse

Sam Merlotte

Twilight

Emmett Cullen

Jasper Hale

Paul Lahote

Seth Clearwater

Wizards of Waverly Place

Justin Russo

Real people:

5 Seconds of Summer members (all)

Ateez members (all)

Cody Fern

Jamie Muscato

Sam and Colby

Stray Kids members (all)

The Boyz (all)

Tomorrow x Together members (all)

Request form: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdf15DK07JIGzKMNPC2FrEgP7ces4KfIxTngYcNwvmusaXxGA/viewform?usp=sf_link

[theflirtmeister]

2024 Fic Round Up

My beloved @puckdoll tagged me in the fic round up! Unfortunately, I have over 115 works posted from this year alone on my main Ao3 account so I didn’t want to spam the dashboard.

HOWEVER I have chosen my favourites from each month + commentary. (Also let me know if you want to see my beautiful Ao3 spreadsheet)

January:

something tragic about us Saw (Movies) Adam Faulkner-Stanheight/Lawrence Gordon/Mark Hoffman

Started off the year with a gross threesome! I think Adam should suffer <3 This originally started differently with more about Adam walking home, but it was so BORING that I cut the entire thing. The first lines I came up with were Adam not wanting to roll onto his stomach because he was overstimulated, which set up my theme of the fic nicely :)

February:

Hey blondie Saw (Movies) Adam Faulkner-Stanheight/Lawrence Gordon

The fic I’d been wanting to write for MONTHS!! I think young Cary Elwes is gorgeous jailbait, and I couldn’t think of a good enough set-up until the Bulletproof exchange. I miss the era of fandom where people shipped actors as different characters, so it was lovely to picture older Adam ruining young Lawrence’s throat.

March:

kingdom through the wilderness Saw (Movies) Adam Faulkner-Stanheight/Jigsaw Apprentices

A special birthday omegaverse gangbang fic for Monty! Sometimes you just need to destroy Adam and get him all covered in cum as a treat for your bestie. I couldn’t figure out if I wanted Logan to appear in this or not, so he’s technically there, but hidden. Also had to slip in some breeding kink because hnng hot. 

April:

psalm 3 The Locked Tomb Gideon Nav/Harrowhark Nonagesimus

First non Saw fic and shortest of them all! I really love this drabble, and I’m annoyed it didn’t get enough love. I think the kiss description is good, and the contrast between Alecto’s POV and what Gideon is saying works well. 

May:

nothing good starts in a getaway car The Passenger  Benson/Randolph "Randy" Bradley

My first Passenger fic, and it’s a 4k fic about Randy getting railed! I never disappoint. Honestly loved writing this, and I hadn’t realised that other people enjoyed it as well until I realised it was being recced. I tried really hard to “get” Benson’s voice as I was writing this, I found it hard to describe his sing-song way of speaking. I also got really into blowjobs where the cock fucks the side of the mouth so included that in there >:)

June:

call me pretty thing Saw (Movies) Adam Faulkner-Stanheight/Alison Gordon/Lawrence Gordon

I LOVE this stupid femslash poly au that I’ve come up with, and I could write thousands of words based in this universe. I think Alison works perfectly as a mean domme, and I know she and Lauren are the hottest dyke couple in Saw City. I enjoy reading BDSM aus (thanks hockey fandom) but I don’t know how good I am at writing them. 

July:

yield the need A Castle for Christmas (Movie 2021) Myles/Thomas (A Castle for Christmas)

I forced Becky to watch A Castle for Christmas last year, and unfortunately, she thinks it’s the best movie ever made. We came up with a very in-depth backstory for Thomas and Myles’ relationship that hits all our buttons (Scotland, repressed homosexuality, teenagers rutting all over the place) so I had to write a fic for the Battleship Exchange. I loveeee writing older men tackling their sexuality and getting their rocks off.

August:

cherry tree Delicious in Dungeon Senshi/Chilchuck Tims

The fact that there is SO LITTLE Senshi/Chilchuck fic is a crime. I really wanted to hit the fisting tags for Battleship Exchange, along with hitting my own size kink desires. This fic literally spilled out of me - I honestly think I wrote it in about an hour in a fugue state. I also never write about men’s balls and wanted to include it in this fic because I know what the Senshi fuckers want >:)

September:

Selachimorpha Jaws (Movies) Martin Brody/Matt Hooper

Another fic where I had a VIBE in my head that I was really trying to pin down - Hooper sweating in the bar and catching sight of Brody and realising he’s in love. I also think the title works really well, Selachimorpha is the scientific name for sharks and I remember my beloved poetry professor telling me to always use latin/scientific words in my work. Shout out to *REDACTED*, sorry for not replying to your facebook messages.

October: 

scent of you Original Work Stepmother with a huge dick/Teen stepdaughter she impregnates

I only posted two fics in October (damn my full time job!) but I did love this horny Original Work for the RelationShipping exchange. My recip was very into mind control, so this was my first foray into that kink and I think it worked well >:) This fic also got me blocked by some mutuals because they didn’t realise I was a freak!

November:

a softer jigsaw trap Saw (Movies) Lawrence Gordon/John "Jigsaw" Kramer

I wrote SO MUCH for Fic In A Box, but I just had to choose these softer world inspired panels. I feel like I worked the hardest on these - I practised first with some Hoffman panels, did a lot of editing of screenshots to create new scenes between Lawrence and Jill, and dusted off my old Photoshop skills! It was also SO MUCH FUN, I loved picking the quotes for the Lawrence/John relationship.

December:

No official December fic yet! I’ve written fic for several exchanges that will hopefully go live this month, so we’ll have to wait and see. ✌️

[nek-ros]

im thinking the monty timeline should be something like:

monty shows up to the new world as a handler

monty starts acting weird and wandering into the wilderness, so he's given hunter training and fitted with some weapons

he goes missing for real at some point in the elder's recess, comes back as a creature/gestalt entity

he stays as a creature for a while, helps with hunts better than before

after being taken to the guiding lands, he's suddenly "human" with plenty of monster bits left (maybe he's all patchy, like the guiding lands itself?)

post-story: he's now a hunter but he still has to deal with his own monster instincts and other weird behaviors

[beastlycheese]

Does Robert Carlyle, now 62, get his kit off in the new TV series of The Full Monty? ‘Nobody wants to see that,’ he says with a grin. 

Photograph: Alana Paterson/The Observer

Interview

By Rebecca Nicholson, printed in Guardian/Observer

Robert Carlyle’s life has been defined by two remarkable characters: the explosively violent Begbie, and Gaz in The Full Monty. Here, he talks about his Glasgow childhood, Britpop hedonism – and playing the PM…

It was 1997, and Robert Carlyle was in his mid-30s, when he first played the stripping Sheffield steelworker Gaz in The Full Monty. Last year, to get ready to play him again – this time for an eight-part TV series – he sat himself down to watch the film. He seems slightly embarrassed to admit it – he’s not the kind of actor who likes to watch himself. “And I’m not about trawling back through something from 20-odd years ago,” he says. But The Full Monty was calling him to South Yorkshire, so trawl back he did. He decided that he would watch a few minutes, then he would move on. “And I sat there and watched the whole thing.” He was surprised to find that it still worked, even after 25 years. “I don’t know if I can say this, but I really enjoyed it. It really stands up.”

The original Full Monty told the story of six unemployed men from Sheffield who put on a DIY strip show at the working men’s club. It was an indie film, shot on a very small budget, and it almost went straight to video; a last-minute re-edit saved it from obscurity and it went on to be a staggering global success, making £200m at the box office. Carlyle’s Gaz is the ringleader, a schemer and a dreamer trying to keep enough money in his pocket to put the heating on when his son comes to stay.

I had misremembered it as a film about men getting their kit off, a bawdy hen night of British comedy. But rewatching it I was struck by how political it seems now. Three decades later, in the new series, people are still broke and Gaz is still scheming, but the working men’s club has shut down, the school is crumbling and children are going hungry.

‘I love it when I dive into a job. You’ve got a little family unit, you love each other to bits and you think you’re going to be friends forever’

“It’s easy to forget that the film is quite heavily political,” says Carlyle. “It makes a point. And I think the same applies to the TV show. These people have lived through what seems like 25 years of austerity.” He credits the writers, Simon Beaufoy and Alice Nutter, with its gallows humour. “But you see that the older people’s lives have been pretty tough for the past 25 years, and then there’s 20 years of what Simon calls the Young Montys, the younger characters, heading for the same shit. So it’s good that this has been made. It shows what people go through to survive the day to day.” Not just men getting their kit off, then. Does he strip this time? “Nobody wants to see that,” he says, with a grin.

Carlyle is a great talker, open and funny and relaxed. He admits he was not always this way, particularly when it came to the press, though he did have his reasons. He’s calmed down a lot since his wilder days, in part because he is, as he says, “125 years old” (he’s just turned 62, though he looks younger) and also because he now lives in Vancouver, on the west coast of Canada. “There’s a laid-back attitude and quality here I enjoy,” he says. He moved there to film a TV series, Once Upon a Time, in 2011, with his wife, Anastasia Shirley, and three children, and found that he liked the city, though he has kept a home in Glasgow, where he grew up, and the family splits its time between the two. His kids are 21, 19 and 17.

Do they have Canadian accents? “Aye, they do,” he laughs. “My eldest son’s got this strange – hang on, let me see if I can do it – this half-American thing with a bit of Scottish thrown in, you know?”

Carlyle is at his happiest when he’s at home. “I’m a homebody, there’s no doubt about that,” he says. “I’ve got loads of friends, particularly in London, and I enjoy it when I get to meet up with them. It’s brilliant. But I’ve always been a bit of a loner to be honest.” Carlyle was brought up by his father; his mother walked out when he was a child. He has spoken before about moving around a lot, living in communes. “I always think about it as darkness and light, my life, because the first part of it was pretty dark. My mother had left when I was a wee boy. I was brought up by my dad alone in Glasgow in the 60s, and the single- parent family, there was not a lot of that around, especially a single-parent family with a father. That made me instantly different from the rest of the people who were around me.” He seems surprised by his own candour. “Genuinely, I’ve never really spoken about this before. But I guess that’s probably where it started.”

I still love Begbie. It was such an explosion. An absolute avalanche

Did he feel like an outsider at school? “When I was very young, yeah, definitely. It’s the little things.” He has a teacher friend and he says he is pleased to hear that things are very different now. “But back in the day, if you had to get permission for something, the teachers would say, bring a note in from your mum. Stuff like that. Of course, when you don’t have that, that really hits home, even when you’re a wee boy.”

Carlyle left school at 16, became a painter and decorator, and worked with his dad. At 21, he came across a copy of Arthur Miller’s The Crucible, and it lit something up inside him. He went on to the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama, and set up his own theatre company. For a loner, he has picked a very sociable job.

“Yeah, but I’ve been doing it for so long that I’ve become very good at separating those things. I love it when I dive into a job, whether theatre, film, TV, whatever. You’ve got a little family unit, you love each other to bits and you think you’re going to be friends for ever. Then two months later you never see them again,” he laughs. Family means a lot to him. “I’d always wanted to have a good family unit, to be able to connect with each other and be pals with each other,” he says, talking about his three children. “Thankfully, we’re great friends.”

In 1991, he was cast as the lead in Ken Loach’s Riff-Raff, and worked steadily through the 90s, playing a serial killer in Cracker, which set the tone for more villainous roles to come. But nothing prepared him for the double whammy of playing the sadistic maniac Begbie in Trainspotting at the end of 1995 and Gaz in The Full Monty, 18 months later. “From that point on, they were massive shadows that then followed me around for the rest of my life, the rest of my career,” he says. “So it was something that I had to get used to, the whole fame thing. Because I am, as I’ve been saying, quite a homely guy, a family man, it took me a long time to get used to that.”

To say the films were hits is an understatement. Both were phenomena that travelled around the world. One of the strangest things about watching The Full Monty again, he says, is that it took him right back to that time. “It’s looking at yourself in another life, and all the things that were happening in my life back then. I mean, we can all look back in photographs, but I’ve got this living, breathing thing in front of me.”

What was happening in his life back then?

“Ha!” It was the height of the Britpop era, and because of those films, Carlyle was right at the heart of it. Back in the day, as he puts it, he was invited to everything and went to most of it. “I met all the personalities of the day, the Oasis lads, Damon Albarn, who’s still a great friend. I was right in the middle of that whole thing, enjoying that life.”

Was it as hedonistic as it seemed? He doesn’t pause for breath. “One thousand per cent,” he grins. “It was incredibly hedonistic, but it was exciting. If you think about it politically, we’d just come out of Tory rule. Blair was there, everything seemed to be on the up. And I can remember that feeling.” He appeared in an Oasis video, for the song Little By Little.

Was it easy to be friends with Blur and Oasis, given their famous rivalry? “Hahaha. To be honest with you, I was really good at not getting involved. But I remember when I did Little By Little, Damon was like, ‘Why the fuck did you do that? Come and do one for me!’ I said, ‘But you never asked,’ which was true! And that was the end of the conversation.”

“It doesn’t sound like you were a homebody in those days,” I say. He laughs again. “No,” he says. “There wasn’t so much homebody then. I certainly wasn’t shy in getting out the door.”

But there was a darker side to that era. His fame made him a person of interest to the tabloids. He says it’s nothing compared to what some people experienced, but still it sounds unpleasant.

“At the time, going through that was horrible, to be honest with you, because I didn’t understand it. I was suddenly in this world and I was very open. Probably too open, at times.” The papers responded by reporting on his private life and his family. “They got in touch with my mother and pulled her out the dark, and that was really upsetting. So I slammed the door shut for a long time, because I just hated it.” He was tight-lipped in interviews and wouldn’t do chatshows, though he will say he still regrets saying no to Michael Parkinson. “I think that was probably quite clever, because then you do keep a little bit of yourself. I mean, you see people on these chatshows and everything comes out and you go, ‘My God, I don’t know how you can live your life like that.’”

He does them these days, however. “Because I’m 125, I’m more used to it,” he jokes. “I can do it better now. Time and age is a great thing.”

Is it just time? Has he mellowed with age?

“It��s family, children. My children came in the 2000s, so all the stuff in the 90s, there were no kids then, but once children arrive in your life, everything changes overnight. So that becomes more important. That becomes your focus. And you begin to think, ‘Oh, the other stuff’s not actually worth bothering about.’”

Carlyle has had the chance to go back to two of his most iconic characters. He revisited Begbie for T2, the Trainspotting sequel, in 2017. A sequel was always planned, and Carlyle says he and Jonny Lee Miller, who plays Sickboy, wanted it to be sooner. “But Danny Boyle [the director] always said, we’ll do it, but when you’re older. He was obviously right, because it’s in the face. You can see that life has been lived.”

Even more so than Gaz, the terrifying Begbie is the character who has followed him around the longest. “The terrifying Begbie!” he laughs. “I love Begbie. I mean, who knew? Who knew what was going to happen with that character? It was such an explosion, Trainspotting. An absolute avalanche.” At the time, he knew that the film was going to be something special. “I thought this character is gonna be around for a while. But I thought, maybe a few years.” Yesterday, he says, he went to the butcher’s near his house, and the man in the shop, in his 20s, from Bilbao, recognised him and said he loved him in Trainspotting. “He said, ‘I’ve got a T-shirt of you, of Begbie with the glass.’ This thing I thought was going to last a few years, is still there, in people’s minds, 27 years later.” Wherever he goes now, people still recognise him as Begbie. “That mad character!” He’s not exactly a teddy bear, is he? “I mean, this is a line from the film – he’s a psycho, but he’s a mate, so what can you do? I do love him. And Gaz. Both these characters have given me a tremendous career and a tremendous life, and you’ve got to love him for that.”

Besides, Begbie’s not dead yet. There is a six-part TV series, The Blade Artist, in the planning, about Begbie’s post-prison life as an acclaimed artist in California. Carlyle is working on it with Irvine Welsh and Hex author Jenni Fagan.

“It’s been brilliant, this one. I mean, let’s face it, Begbie is me. So to be right in at the beginning of that and be able to go, well, actually, maybe change this, change that… that’s where we are at the moment.” He thinks they’ll start shooting in the next year or two.

For now, he’s off work, relaxing in Vancouver, travelling with his wife, spending time with his family. “Back in the day, it was all about the next job, next job, next job and I don’t think so much like that any more.”

Recently, he’s been playing the British prime minster, Robert Sutherland, in the political thriller Cobra. “Who would have thought? Begbie, Gaz, the prime minister…” he says. In the original Full Monty, Gaz explains that he can’t go shoplifting because “I’ve got serial killer written on my forehead.” Carlyle nods. “That’s right. That’s probably my issue with parts. Certainly with Sutherland, when he gets angry, I’ve got to really pull it down. Don’t get Begbie-angry,” he says. “Begbie as the prime minister!” I wouldn’t put it past him.

The Full Monty will be streaming on Disney+ from 14 June

[ayyy-imma-ninja]

What are your voice claims for the fairy boys? Are they the same as the Sun and Moon from SB or are they different? Personally I’ve just been imagining them having higher pitched voices, and Moon’s voice not being raspy like in-game.

If you've seen or heard of the Sun and Moon Show, I imagine fairy Sun's voice sounding like the early days of SAMS Sun, high-pitched and energetic, and all-around silly. Though of course it changes in more upsetting or dramatic moments.

Moon's, SAMS Moon, but not as deep. Slightly higher pitch.

...

I'm realizing all my HC voices for the fairies is just characters from SAMS >w<

fairy Lunar=SAMS Lunar, but not as childish. Early days of Lunar.

Heck, even dragon Monty has SAMS Monty's voice.

Him=....yep.

The SK boys' voice claims are more closer to their in-game voices. But I imagine Sun sounding like Swiblet's and Moon's being a slightly deeper take of Corey Wilder's Moon.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Is It Really That Bad?

It’s hard to believe nowadays, but there was a time where the Tim Burton/Johnny Depp duo was known for delivering nothing but certified bangers. Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, Sleepy Hollow… It was just hit after hit when these two joined forces. But in the mid 2000s, something shifted. It suddenly seemed like people were sick of Burton, sick of Depp, and most of all sick of them working together. Sure, Corpse Bride and Sweeney Todd were still well-liked, but once Alice in Wonderland hit theaters people weren’t shy about voicing their dislike of the director and especially the actor. Burton kind of skidded to a halt for a while, while Depp just kept making increasingly worse movies with Disney and generally not doing anything worthwhile after Rango, and while Alice was the breaking point, the cracks started to show in 2005 with a little film called Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

An attempt to redo Roald Dahl’s novel about a precocious child touring the candy factory of a wacky candymaker was being planned for a long time, with even Nicolas Cage in talks at one point to be Wonka, and at another point good ol’ Martin Scorcese was attached to direct. But things just kept falling through until Burton got dragged in, and from there he proceeded to get things done and talk the studio out of stupid decisions like killing off Charlie’s dad and making Wonka a parental figure. Ah, but speaking of Wonka, that crucial role needed filling, and it seemed a lot of famous actors were considered for the role by the studio—Robin Williams, Patrick Stewart, Michael Keaton, Steve Martin, Bill Murray, Christopher Walken, Brad Pitt, Leslie Nielsen, Robert De Niro, Will Smith, Mike Meyers, Ben Stiller, pretty much every living member of Monty Python left at the time, Adam Sandler, and Marilyn Manson among them according to TVTropes—and Burton had an interesting idea for his second pick to play the guy:

But instead he went for his first pick, someone who’s actually very similar to Marilyn Manson in a lot of ways! Good ol’ reliable JD himself! Surely this was gonna bring in the big bucks! And... it did! It's the highest-grossing adaptation of one of Dahl's works ever, and Burton's second highest-grossing film!

Critics seemed mostly fine with it, but audiences were a lot more divided. Some people liked that it was a new and different take on the story that stayed a lot more true to the book than the beloved 1971 Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (a movie that Dahl famously hated as much as he did Jewish people, so frankly who gives a shit about his opinion), while others clung to the nostalgia of the Gene Wilder Wonka and treated this new film like a war crime. How dare they remake their favorite movie, even though this isn't a remake, it's just a different adaptation of the same book!

So yes, this movie isn’t the most reviled film out there, but it definitely is incredibly divisive, and what’s more I distinctly recall even as a child being aware of the attitude towards Depp and Burton shifting towards the more negative when this film came out. So I figured it was a high time I see about revisiting it and find out if this second cinematic outing into Wonka’s factory was really that bad, or if it genuinely was a work of impure imagination.

THE GOOD

It may surprise you to hear that this film actually does a few things better than the 1971 film. This is especially evident in the four shitty children touring the factory with Charlie.

The ones from Willy Wonka were, to put it bluntly, dull and forgettable, and came off as far too sympathetic in regards to their fate because none of them aside from Veruca Salt showcased any terrible traits that would lead to them deserving their punishments. In this film, all these kids are assholes, so watching them fall prey to the karmic justice of Wonka's factory is all the more satisfying. We also get to see what happens to them after they get out, which is kind of funny. I’m not gonna pretend that they made them the deepest and most complex characters ever, but with how they updated them and with the young actors they got to portray them, they managed to inject a bit more life into them than you’d expect.

This movie also fixes Grandpa Joe, who is pretty infamous to fans of the '71 film as a total asshole who constantly encourages Charlie to steal and just in general seems like a massive burden to his family. Here, he actually is every bit the sweet old grandpa that you’d expect, and his motivations for wanting to go on the tour are a lot nicer and more sympathetic. He also never tries to push Charlie into a life of crime, which is nice.

Of course, the very best aspect of this movie is Deep motherfucking Roy. He’s the second best dwarf actor out there, only oovershadowed by Warwick “Leprechaun” Davis, and much like Davis was in Star Wars as the ultimate Glup Shitto—Droopy McCool.

And in this film he gets the incredible honor of being every single fucking Oompa-Loompa there is, and he is clearly having a blast and busting his ass. He had no prior dancing experience, but you could not tell with how he’s pulling off all these sick moves while spitting out diss tracks for children like he’s Blood on the Dance Floor. He really is the single best actor in the movie, and that’s not to slander anyone else—Roy is just that good. Like we have a scene-stealing minor role for Christopher Lee as Wonka’s dad, a crabby dentist who hates candy, and as amazing as he is Roy still is better. You better respect this man.

Speaking of men to respect: Danny Elfman. Taking lyrics straight from the book and weaving a unique style for each kid—Big Bollywood spectacle for Augustus (that was Roy’s idea), 70s funk for Violet, psychedelic rock for Veruca, and hard rock for Mike—the songs are all genuinely great and fun to listen to. I’d never go as far as to say they’re more iconic than the Oompa-Loompa tracks from the ‘71 film, but I think they function better as songs, and the fact each of them has their own distinct style to set them apart from each other was the right way to go. I do think Mike’s song is the weakest of the bunch, feeling a lot messier than the other three, but it’s not unbearably awful or anything.

THE BAD

The biggest issue with the film is that the two most important characters—Charlie and Wonka—fucking suck.

Let’s start with Charlie. Now, to be clear, I’m not putting any blame on Freddie Highmore—he was literally a child, and even then I think he’s doing his damndest to make Charlie cute and whimsical. The issue here is definitely on the writers, who saw fit to stuff him full of all the syrupy sweet Tiny Tim-esque kind-hearted poor child cliches but forgot to impart a personality to go with them. Charlie is, to put it bluntly, a boring and generic nice guy, and one who ends up feeling like a living plot device to further Wonka’s character development, something that feels especially egregious when his name is literally in the title.

And now let’s talk about Wonka. Boy, is there a lot to unpack with this guy.

Literally everything about this take on Wonka is incredibly awkward and off-putting. The most infamous aspect of him is definitely the look; with his pale skin and dorky haircut he looked a lot like Michael Jackson, who at the time the film came out was going through a very serious scandal where he was accused of doing awful things to children in his big rich guy mansion�� which is essentially the plot of this film when you think about it.

But that’s just an unfortunate coincidence! It’s an ugly look, sure, but a good performance could make it palatable, and this was Johnny Depp during his big post-Jack Sparrow renaissance working together with the guy who helped put him on the map. Surely he wouldn’t deliver an incredibly awkward, cringey, and insufferable performance that dials up all his acting quirks to annoying levels, right?

Here’s the thing: On paper, Depp’s Wonka is honestly not that different than Wilder’s. They’re both weird, quirky, reclusive confectioners with a not-so-hidden disdain for the kids touring their factory and snarky, condescending attitudes. What it all comes down to is the presentation, and to show you what I mean I’m going to use the most batshit comparison you’ve ever seen:

Burton’s Wonka is very similar to Zack Snyder’s Ozymandias.

“Now hold on, Michael,” I hear you exclaiming in utter bewilderment, “how are these two comparable? I know that both are fine with the wonton murder of children if it helps achieve their goals and that a lot of people are weirdly horny for them, but how is this a good comparison?” Well luckily I’m not trying to compare a mass-murdering anti-villain to a quirky chocolatier in terms of character, but in how the adaptation drops the ball with how they’re presented by removing the more warm and positive aspects of them. In Alan Moore’s comic, Adrian Veidt is essentially a relentlessly charming gigachad, an affable and approachable fellow who seems beneath suspicion because he exudes a traditionally heroic warmth. In the movie, however, Snyder chose to portray Veidt as a cold, distant twink who doesn’t seem particularly approachable at all (another case of Daddy Zaddy tragically missing Moore’s point).

This same "missing the point" issue plagues Wonka. Yes, Wilder’s take is just as much a smug asshole reveling in the comeuppance the children are receiving, but he also has a genuine warmth to him which is codified perfectly with him singing “Pure Imagination.” Sure, he’s perfectly willing to traumatize everyone with a demented boat ride shortly after, but Wilder’s performance and the presentation of his Wonks help sell him as a quirky genius who is more likable than insufferable, and you really understand how despite being kind of a dick he is also a beloved figure.

Depp’s Wonka fails as the character in the same basic ways that the movie version of Veidt does: He's a condescending, cold, openly rude, guy who is just genuinely unpleasant to be around despite the movie really trying hard to make him likable and relatable, to the point where unlike Wilder's take it's hard to grasp why this guy gets any respect from anyone. He’s like the proto-Rick Sanchez, except he’s not even particularly funny to make up for it. Maybe this take is more accurate to the book, but if it is it’s really just proof that taking liberties when adapting really is for the best.

And this failure is only compounded by the movie piling on a tragic backstory for Wonka. Yes, Christopher Lee is great, but there is genuinely no need to pile on a traumatic childhood and weird daddy issues to Willy Wonka. The character works best as this weird, trickster mentor figure who dishes out karma to the naughty kids and ultimately rewards the good egg of the bunch. Trying to bring a guy with a magical factory full of dwarfs who do choreographed diss tracks every time a kid falls into the incinerator down to earth and make him relatable is just a mind-boggling decision.

These are really the only two issues with the film that stand out as excessively bad, but… you see the problem, right? The titular character and the owner of the titular chocolate factory are both bad. One’s a living prop, the other is just an obnoxious asshat who is given unneeded character development that ends up falling flat, and while this would be easy to ignore if they were side characters it’s impossible to let slide since they are the main fucking characters. The whole film revolves around the two very worst things in it, and no matter how good the other stuff in the movie is these elements alone drag it down a lot.

IS IT REALLY THAT BAD?

Look, I’m not going to pretend like this is a great film. If it really is closer to Dahl’s book, all it managed to do is convince me to never read it and solidified my belief that being pragmatic when adapting books to screen is the way to go. It’s also really easy to see how the Burton-Depp fatigue came about, as this is some of the weakest work in both of their filmographies.

But I still feel like there’s plenty to like here. The songs, the bratty kids, Deep motherfucking Roy, it’s all genuinely good shit! There was never a chance it was going to be iconic as the Wilder film, but it’s disingenuous to write it off entirely when it does a lot good things (and a few things better than the '71 version). A lot of people are nostalgic for this one these days, as it's the one this generation grew up with, and honestly? I can't really blame them entirely. It's a decent enough movie, and I honestly think that score it has up there is pretty fair. It's certainly a mixed bag but when it actually succeeds at being charming it does it in its own unique way rather than trying to ape the beloved classic that came before it, and I do respect it for that.

And hey, if Johnny Depp's worst and most annoying movie role is in a movie I'd still say is okay, that's a good thing right? He couldn't possibly ever take a role more cringeworthy and annoying than Wonka in a film that's genuinely shitty, right?

Right?

RIGHT?!

[specificpollsaboutbooks]

(Unverified yet) submissions for couples from books (polyamory ships will get their own tournament too later) :

Other :

Magnus Chase/Alex Fierro (Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard)

F/F :

Rosethorn/Lark (Emelan)

Blue/Red (This Is How You Lose the Time War)

Dellaria “Delly” Wells/Winnifer "Winn" Cynallumwynsurai (The Ruthless Lady's Guide to Wizardry)

Kyoshi/Rangi (Chronicles of the Avatar)

Sarah Bishop/Emily Mather (All Souls trilogy)

Maud Blyth/Violet Debenham (A Restless Truth)

M/M :

Ronan Lynch/Adam Parrish (The Raven Cycle)

Naolin/Brennan Sorrengail (The Empyrean series)

Henry "Monty" Montague/Percy Newton (The Montague Siblings series)

Simon Snow/Bazilton "Baz" Grimm-Pitch (Simon Snow series)

Jesper Fahey/Wylan van Eck (Six of Crows duology)

Aristotle Mendoza/Dante Quintana (Aristotle and Dante books)

Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood (Ths Shadowhunters Chronicles)

Robin Blyth/Edwin Courcey (A Marvellous Light)

Jack Alston/Alan Ross (A Power Unbound)

F/M :

Part 1 -

Blue Sargent/Richard Campbell Gansey III (The Raven Cycle)

Sophie Hatter/Wizard Howl Jenkins Pendragon (Howl's Moving Castle)

Abdullah/Flower-in-the-Night (Castle in the Air)

Lettie Hatter/Wizard Suliman a.k.a Benjamin Sullivan (Castle in the Air)

Lady Amalthea/Prince Lír (The Last Unicorn)

Schmendrick/Molly Grue (The Last Unicorn)

Christine Daaé/Vicomte Raoul de Chagny (The Phantom of the Opera)

Jonathan Harker/Mina Murray Harker (Dracula)

Linh Cinder/Prince Kai (The Lunar Chronicles)

Scarlet Benoit/Wolf a.k.a Ze'ev Kelsey (The Lunar Chronicles)

Winter Hayle-Blackburn/Jacin Clay (The Lunar Chronicles)

Kaz Brekker/Inej Ghafa (Six of Crows duology)

Jude Duarte/Cardan Greenbrair (The Folk of the Air series)

Puck Connolly/Sean Kendrick (The Scorpio Races)

Laia of Serra/Elias Veturius (An Ember in the Ashes series)

Evie/Lend (Paranormalcy)

Margaret Welty/Weston Winters (A Far Wilder Magic)

Emily Wilde/Wendell Bambleby (Emily Wilde books)

Lucivar Yaslana/Marian (The Black Jewels trilogy)

Katniss Everdeen/Peeta Mellark (The Hunger Games)

Elizabeth Bennet/Fitzwilliam Darcy (Pride and Prejudice)

Isaac Bell/Marian Morgan (Isaac Bell Books)

Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase (Riordanverse)

William "Will" Herondale/Tessa Gray (The Infernal Devices)

Princess Anidori-Kiladra Talianna Isilee a.k.a Ani or Isi/Prince Geric (Goose Girl)

Anne Elliot/Capt. Frederick Wentworth (Persuasion)

Finlay Donovan/Det. Nick Anthony (Finlay Donovan)

Francesca Stirling/Micheal Stirling (Bridgerton)

Matthew Clairmont/Diana Bishop (All Souls trilogy)

Penelope/Odysseus (The Odyssey)

Romeo Montague/Juliet Capulet (Romeo and Juliet)

Patricia Delfine/Laurence Armstead (All the Birds in the Sky)

Part 2 -

Nancy Drew/Ned Nickerson (Nancy Drew series)

Princess Buttercup/Westley (The Princess Bride)

Pepper/Blue (A Closed and Common Orbit)

Matthias Hevlar/Nina Zennik (Six of Crows)

Jane Bennet/Charles Bingley (Pride and Prejudice)

Lucy Carlyle/A.J. Lockwood (Lockwood & Co.)

Kell Maresh/Lila Bard (Shades of Magic)

Marisa Coulter/Lord Asriel Belacqua (His Dark Materials)

[threebooksoneplot]

Dumb love triangle suggestion: Young Frankenstein

fgyfiuaohibsa so is beau the gene wilder or the madeline kahn here? (G votes madeline kahn)

either way: absolutely tracks. he loves him a monty python, so why not a mel brooks?

instead of "Paris," that chapter in Euphoria and Agony could've been titled "Dr. Frederick Frahnkensteen." has a much better ring to it