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ehliena · 4 years

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FilAms referring to the Philippines as the acronym PI while they are calling homelanders for the use of Filipinx and Pinxy is peak irony. That is without adding these two facts: the letter F is a loaned letter in Tagalog from the oppressors (and its corresponding phoneme too) and that the demonym is an appellation to Felipe II of Spain. And for someone like me who reads and writes in Baybayin since age 15, to write a Baybayin X seems like a dark humor scene in a Taika Waititi comedy. (Yes, I do Baybayin shiz for fun, but not as serious as Kristian Kabuay and NordenX.)

I first encountered PI among FilAms during Christmas vacation 2002 in LA; and Pilipinx when I joined the theatrical production of a FilAm musical at CalState East Bay in 2016. I understand that it is their culture and I respect it, and I assimilate. I easily assimilate with what I call my Nickelodeon voice, which I have acquired from when jailbroken cable services became a thing in Mega Manila and through my theatre background. But when in Rome, we live the Roman way, so as the Santa Mesa-born foreigner, I have to hide that dark laughter every single time someone uses PI.

But of course, 2020 had to make us see PI-using FilAms pressuring homelander to use Filipinx, citing political correctness and gender neutrality (while white American Pemberton, the killer of Filipino transwoman Jennifer Laude, was given an absolute pardon by Duterte).

So, let us start my TEDtalk.

P.I. is a colloquial acronym for Putanginamo (the equivalent of Fuck You) used by conservative Filipinos who probably are only retelling a story.

Tsismosa 1: “Minura ni Aling Biring si Ka Boying.” (Aling Biring cursed Ka Boying)

Tsismosa 2: “Oh? Ano ika?” (Really? What did she say?)

Tsismosa 1: “Malutong at umaatikabong PI.” (A hard and surging PI.)

Then I imagine PI as the curse when FilAms say some sentences:

“Are you flying back to Putangina?”

“I miss Putangina. We went to Boracay.”

“Duterte is President of Putangina.”

But it’s fine with me. I understand they mean well and I know that Americans, as first world as they are, have poor grasp of history. It’s a little sad though that FilAms have not always been reminded of this special footnote in the history of the United States:

P.I. stands for Philippine Islands. That’s the colonial name of the Philippines as a commonwealth republic under the United States, which the republic stopped using when the 1935 Constitution was enacted in 1946. Yes, in case people are forgetting, the Philippines has long been a state with full sovereignty recognized by the United Nations (of which we are a founding member of and wherein Carlos Romulo served as President) and recognized by Shaider Pulis Pangkalawakan.

Also, RP is used to refer to the Republic of the Philippines before the use of the standard two-letter country code PH.

I’m not saying FilAms should stop using PI to refer to the Philippines but I’m saying that the roots of that practice is from American oppression that homelanders have already cancelledttt.

Our oldest bank in the Philippines is BPI. It stands for Bank of the Philippine Islands, originally named El Banco Español Filipino de Isabel II because it was founded during Queen Isabella II’s reign. It was a public bank by then; perhaps comparable to the Federal Reserve. Upon its privatization during the American occupation, the bank started using BPI for the sake of branding because it was the Americans who christened us with P.I. (I have a theory that Manila was a character in Money Heist because the Royal Mint of Spain used to have a branch in the Philippines and operated very closely with BPI. And my other supernatural theory is that our translation of peso which is ‘piso’ affects our economy. ‘Piso’ means ‘floor’ or ‘flat’ in Spanish.)

Now, going back. To me, P.I. is more appropriate an acronym for the ethnic group of Pacific Islanders. I don't think I need to explain further why. These would be the natives of Hawai’i, Guam, Tuvalu, Kiribati, and other islands in the Oceania continent, and maybe even New Zealand. If a curious FilAm raises a question of whether Filipinos are Pacific Islanders or Asians or Hispanics, the answer is long but easy to understand.

The Filipinos live in a group of islands within the Pacific Plate. The Philippines is an Asian country, following conventions of geopolitical continental borders from the other. We are Hispanics by virtue of being under Spain for three fucking centuries. And Teresita Marquez is Reina Hispanoamericana because why not? (We could’ve been a part of America still if not for the efforts of Quezon.) So, the quick answer is that the Filipino is all of it.

Yes, the Filipinos have an affinity with the Pacific through nature and geography. Think of the earthquakes, volcanoes, flora and fauna, and the coconuts. And they even look like us. The earlier inhabitants of the archipelago were Pacific Islanders who were introduced to Hinduism and Buddhism as being closer to the cradles of civilization India and China. Then, the Islamic faith has grown along with the rise of the kingdoms and polities in Southeast Asia. The Spaniards arrived in the archipelago, to an already civilized Islamic polity - too civilized that they understood how diplomacy is necessary in war. We knew that it resulted to the defeat and death of Magellan who was fighting for Rajah ‘Don Carlos’ Humabon. Then came the 333 years of being under Spain AND (sic) the Catholic Church which made us more Hispanic. Our Austronesian/Malayo-Polynesian languages (Tagalog, Bisaya, Kapampangan, Ilocano, Bikol, Waray, Cuyonon, etc.) have kept our Asian identity intact - unlike Latin American countries where the official language of each is one of the Romance languages; thus "Latin".

(It is only towards the end of that 333-year Spanish rule that the 'Filipino' emerged to be something the oppressed could claim, and for that we thank the poet in Jose Rizal. I see a parallel in how Christians claimed the cross, the former symbol of criminals in Jewish tradition, to become the symbol of God’s love and salvation through Jesus. Wow. That’s so UST of me. Lol.)

You add into the mix that our diaspora is so large and identifiable, the data gatherers decided to mark the tables with “Filipino” - too Asian to be Hispanic and Pacific, too Pacific to be Hispanic and Asian, and too Hispanic to be Asian and Pacific.

What many FilAms do not realize everyday is that unlike the words Blacks, Latinx, Asians, or Pacific Islanders, or Hispanics, the word Filipino is not just a word denoting an ethnic group. At its highest technical form, the word Filipino is a word for the citizenship of a sovereign nation, enshrined in the constitution of a free people whose history hinges on the first constitutional republic in Asia.

By state, we mean a sovereign nation and not a federal state. (Well, even with Chinese intervention, at the very least we try.)

By state, we mean we are a people with a national territory, a government, and a legal system inspired by the traditions of our ancestors and oppressors. It may be ugly, but it is ours, and we have the power to change it.

This one may be as confusing as Greek-Grecian-Greco-Hellenic-Hellene, but let’s examine the word 'Filipino' further when placed side by side with related words.

*Pilipinas is the country; official name: Republika ng Pilipinas. It is translated into English as “Philippines”; official name: Republic of the Philippines. Spanish translates it into “Filipinas”, the Germans “Philippinen”, the French “Les Philippines”, the Italians “Filippine”.

*Pilipino refers to the people. It is translated into English as Filipino. The plural forms are ‘mga Pilipino’ and ‘Filipinos’.

*Philippine is an English adjective relating to the Philippines, commonly used for official functions. It may be used as an alternative to the other western adjective ‘Filipino’ but the interchangeability is very, very nuanced. Filipino people not Philippine people. Filipino government and Philippine government. Philippine Embassy, Filipino embassy, not Filipino Embassy. Tricky, eh?

*Filipino also refers to the official language of the state (which is basically Tagalog).

*Filipiniana refers to Philippine-related books and non-book materials (cultural items, games, fashion, etc.) which could be produced by Filipinos or non-Filipinos, inside or outside the Philippines.

*Pinoy is a colloquial gender-neutral demonym; comparable to how New Zealanders use the word Kiwi.

The demonym Filipino has evolved from that of referring only to Spaniards in the Philippines into becoming the term for the native people who choose to embrace the identity of a national.

It started from when Jose Rizal wrote his poem “A la juventud filipina” and he emerged as an inspiration to the Philippine Revolution through Andres Bonifacio’s leadership. (But take note of ‘filipina’ because ‘juventud’ is a feminine word in Spanish.)

Today, no less than the 1987 Philippine Constitution, which was neither written by Hamilton nor a group of straight white men but by people of different faiths, genders, disabilities, and skin colors, in its first five words in both Filipino and English versions read: "Kami, ang nakapangyayaring sambayanang Pilipino", translated as "We, the sovereign Filipino people” validates the legitimacy of the word as gender-neutral, alive, aware and awake with our history of struggles.

Article 14 Section 7 of the current Constitution says Filipino is the national language. And while I agree that it is not really a real language but an alias for Tagalog, it is a conscientious codification of a social norm during the time of Manuel Quezon as he is aiming for the world to recognize the unified Filipinos as a sovereign people. People. Not men. Not heterosexual men. People.

It is a non-issue for the homeland Filipino that the word Filipino refers to the people and the language. But FilAms are concerned of political correctness due to an understandable cultural insecurity also felt by other non-whites in the US. And there is added confusion when FilAms pattern the word Filipino after the patriarchal Spanish language, without learning that the core of the grammars of Philippine languages are gender-neutral. The Tagalog pronoun "siya" has no gender. "Aba Ginoong Maria" is proof that the Tagalog word 'ginoo' originally has no gender. Our language is so high-context that we have a fundamental preposition: “sa”.

It is difficult to be a person of color in the United States especially in these times of the white supremacy’s galling resurgence. Well, it’s not like they have been gone, but this time, with Trump, especially, it’s like the movement took steroids and was given an advertising budget. But for FilAms to force Filipinx into the Philippines, among homeland Filipinos, is a rather uneducated move, insensitive of the legacies of our national heroes and magnificent leaders.

The FilAm culture and the Filipino homeland culture are super different, nuanced. It’s a different dynamic for a Latinx who speak Spanish or Portuguese or whatever their native language is - it reminds entitled white English-speaking America of their place in the continent. It should remind a racist white man whose roots hail from Denmark that his house in Los Angeles stands on what used to be the Mexican Empire.

Let’s use a specific cultural experience by a Black person for example: the black person not only has Smith or Johnson for their last name, but there is no single easy way for them to retrieve their family tree denoting which African country they were from, unless the Slave Trade has data as meticulous as the SALN forms. Let’s use a specific cultural experience by a Mexican-American with Native American heritage: the person is discriminated by a white US Border Patrol officer in the border of Texas. Texas used to be part of Mexico. Filipinos have a traceable lineage and a homeland.

Filipinos and FilAms may be enjoying the same food recipes, dancing the same cultural dance for purposes of presentations every once in a while, but the living conditions, the geography, the languages, social experiences, the human conditions are different, making the psychology, the politics, the social implications more disparate than Latinxs like Mexicans and Mexican Americans.

I don’t know if it is too much advertising from state instruments or from whatever but FilAms don’t realize how insensitive they have become in trying to shove a cultural tone down the throats of the citizens of the republic or of those who have closer affinity to it. And some Filipino homelanders who are very used to accommodating new global social trends without much sifting fall into the trap of misplaced passions.

To each his own, I guess. But FilAms should read Jose Rizal’s two novels, Carlos Romulo’s “I am a Filipino”, materials by Miriam Defensor Santiago (not just the humor books), speeches of Claro Recto, books by historians Gregorio Zaide, Teodoro Agoncillo, Renato Constantino, Nick Joaquin, Regalado Trota Jose, Fidel Villaroel, Zeus Salazar, Xiao Chua, and Ambeth Ocampo, and really immerse themselves in the struggle of the Filipino for an unidentifiable identity which the FilAms confuse for the FilAm culture. That’s a little weird because unlike Blacks and the Latinx movement, the Philippines is a real sovereign state which FilAms could hinge their history from.

I have to be honest. The homelanders don’t really care much about FilAm civil rights heroes Philip Vera Cruz and Larry Itliong, or even Alice Peña Bulos, because it was a different fight. But the media can play a role sharing it, shaping consensus and inadvertently setting standards. (But it’s slightly different for Peña Bulos, as people are realizing she was already a somebody in the Philippines before becoming a who’s who in the US, which is somehow similar to the case of Lea Salonga who was not only from the illustrious Salonga clan, but was also already a child star.) How much do Filipino millennials know about Marcoses, Aquinos? Maybe too serious? Lol. Then, let’s try using my favorite examples as a couch potato of newer cultural materials accessible to FilAms - cultural materials on television and internet.

FilAms who only watched TFC wondered who Regine Velasquez was when ABSCBN welcomed her like a beauty queen. Those with the GMA Pinoy TV have a little idea. But they did not initially get why the most successful Filipino artist in the US, Lea Salonga, does not get that level of adulation at home that Velasquez enjoys. Was it just Regine’s voice? No. Well, kinda, maybe, because there is no question that she is a damn good singer with God knows how many octaves, but it is the culture she represents as a probinsyana who made it that far and chose to go back home and stay - and that’s already a cultural nuance Filipinos understand and resonate with, without having to verbalize because the Philippines is a high-context culture in general, versus the US which is low-context culture in general. I mean, how many Filipinos know the difference of West End and Broadway, and a Tony and an Olivier? What does a Famas or a Palanca mean to a FilAm, to a Filipino scholar, and to an ordinary Filipino? Parallel those ideas with "Bulacan", "Asia", "Birit", "Songbird".

You think Coach Apl.de.Ap is that big in the Philippines? He was there for the global branding of the franchise because he is an American figure but really, Francis Magalona (+) and Gloc9 hold more influence. And speaking of influence, do FilAms know Macoy Dubs, Lloyd Cadena (+) and the cultures they represent? Do FilAms know Aling Marie and how a sari-sari store operates within a community? Do FilAms see the symbolic functions of a makeshift basketball (half)courts where fights happen regularly? How much premium do FilAms put on queer icons Boy Abunda, Vice Ganda? Do FilAms realize that Kris Aquino's role in Crazy Rich Asians was not just to have a Filipino in the cast (given that Nico Santos is already there) but was also Kris Aquino's version of a PR stunt to showcase that Filipinos are of equal footing with Asian counterparts if only in the game of 'pabonggahan'? Will the FilAms get it if someone says ‘kamukha ni Arn-arn’? Do FilAms see the humor in a Jaclyn Jose impersonation? Do FilAms even give premiums to the gems Ricky Lee, Peque Gallaga, Joel Lamangan, Joyce Bernal, Cathy Garcia Molina, and Jose Javier Reyes wrote and directed? (And these are not even National Artists.) How about AlDub or the experience of cringing to edgy and sometimes downright disgusting remarks of Joey De Leon while also admiring his creative genius? Do FilAms understand the process of how Vic Sotto became ‘Bossing’ and how Michael V could transform into Armi Millare? Do FilAms get that Sexbomb doesn’t remind people of Tom Jones but of Rochelle? Do FilAms get that dark humor when Jay Sonza’s name is placed beside Mel Tiangco’s? What do FilAms associate with the names ‘Tulfo’, ‘Isko’, ‘Erap’, ‘Charo’, ‘Matet’, ‘Janice’, ‘Miriam’, ‘Aga’, ‘Imelda’ and ‘Papin’? Do FilAms get that majority of Filipinos cannot jive into Rex Navarette’s and Jo Koy’s humor but find the comic antics of JoWaPao, Eugene Domingo, Mr Fu, Ryan Rems, and Donna Cariaga very easy to click with? Do FilAms know Jimmy Alapag, Jayjay Helterbrand, Josh Urbiztondo? Oh wait, these guys are FilAms. Lol. Both cultures find bridge in NBA, but have these FilAms been to a UAAP, NCAA, or a PBA basketball game where the longstanding rival groups face each other? Do FilAms know the legacy of Ely Buendia and the Eraserheads? Do FilAms know about Brenan Espartinez wearing this green costume on Sineskwela? Do FilAms know how Kiko Matsing, Ate Sienna, Kuya Bodjie helped shape a generation of a neoliberal workforce?

That list goes on and on, when it comes to this type of Filipiniana materials on pop culture, and I am sure as Shirley Puruntong that while the homeland Filipino culture is not as widespread, it has depth in its humble and high-context character.

Now, look at the practical traffic experiences of the homelanders. People riding the jeepneys, the tricycles, the MRT/LRT, the buses, and the kolorum - the daily Via Crucis of Mega Manila only Filipinos understand the gravity of, even without yet considering the germs passed as the payments pass through five million other passengers before reaching the front. Add the probinsyas, people from periphery islands who cross the sea to get good internet connections or do a checkup in the closest first-class town or component city. Do FilAms realize that the largest indoor arena in the world is built and owned by Iglesia ni Cristo, a homegrown Christian church with a headquarters that could equal the Disney castle?

Do FilAms know the experience as a tourist's experience or as an experience a homelander want to get away from or at least improved?

Do FilAms understand how much an SM, a Puregold, or a Jollibee, Greenwich, Chowking branch superbly change a town and its psychology and how it affects the Pamilihang Bayan? Do FilAms realize that while they find amusement over the use of tabo, the homelanders are not amused with something so routinary? Do FilAms realize how Filipinos shriek at the thought that regular US households do not wash their butts with soap and water after defecating?

Do FilAms understand the whole concept of "ayuda" or SAP Form in the context of pandemic and politics? The US has food banks, EDDs, and stubs - but the ayuda is nowhere near the first world entitlements Filipinos in the homeland could consider luxury. But, that in itself is part of the cultural nuance.

Do FilAms know that Oxford recognizes Philippine English as a diction of the English language? While we’ve slowly grown out of the fondness for pridyider and kolgeyt, do FilAms know how xerox is still used in the local parlance? Do FilAms know how excruciating it is to read Panitikan school books Ibong Adarna, Florante at Laura under the curriculum, and how light it is to read Bob Ong? Do FilAms realize that Jessica Zafra, with all her genius, is not the ordinary homelander’s cup-of-tea?

Do FilAms know that Filipinos do not sound as bad in English as stereotypes made them believe? Do FilAms really think that Philippines will be a call center capital if our accents sound like the idiolects of Rodrigo Duterte’s or Ninoy Aquino’s Philippine English accent? Do FilAms realize how Ninoy and Cory speak English with different accents? Lea Salonga's accent is a thespian's accent so she could do a long range like that of Meryl Streep if she wants to so she wouldn't be a good example. Pacquiao's accent shows the idiolect unique to his region in southern Philippines. But for purposes of showing an ethnolinguistic detail, I am using President Cory Aquino’s accent when she delivered her historic speech in the US Congress as a more current model of the Philippine English accent.

Do FilAms bother themselves with the monsoons, the humidity, and the viscosity of sweat the same way they get bothered with snowstorms, and heat waves measured in Fahrenheit?

Do FilAms know that not only heterosexual men are accepted in the Katipunan? Do FilAms even know what the Katipunan is? Do FilAms realize that the Philippines had two female presidents and a transwoman lawmaker? Do FilAms take “mamatay nang dahil sa’yo” the same way Filipinos do? Do FilAms know the ground and the grassroots? Do FilAms know the Filipino culture of the homeland?

These are cultural nuances FilAms will never understand without exposure of Philippine society reflected from barrio to lalawigan, from Tondo to Forbes Park. It goes the same way with Filipinos not understanding the cultural weight of Robert Lopez and the EGOT, or Seafood City, or Lucky Chances Casino, or what Jollibee symbolizes in New York, unless they are exposed.

The thing though is that while it is harder for FilAms to immerse to the homeland culture, it is easier for homeland culture to immerse into the FilAm’s because America’s excess extends to the propagation of its own subcultures, of which the FilAm’s is one.

We’re the same yet we’re different. But it should not be an issue if we are serious with embracing diversity. There should not be an issue with difference when we could find a common ground in a sense of history and shared destiny. But it is the burden of the Filipinos with and in power to understand the situation of those who have not.

Nuances. Nuances. Nuances.

And while I believe that changing a vowel into X to promote gender-neutrality has a noble intention, there is no need to fix things that are not broken. Do not be like politicians whose acts of service is to destroy streets and roads and then call for its renovation instead of fixing broken bridges or creating roads where there are none.

The word ‘Filipino’ is not broken. Since Rizal’s use of the term to refer to his Malayan folks, the formal process of repair started. And it is not merely codified, but validated by our prevailing Constitution, which I don’t think a FilAm would care to read, and I cannot blame them. What's in it for a regular FilAm? They wouldn’t read the US Constitution and the Federalist Papers; what more the 1987 Saligang Batas?

The bottomline of my thoughts on this particular X issue is that FilAms cannot impose a standard for Filipinos without going through a deeper, well-thought-out, more arduous process, most especially when the card of gender neutrality and political correctness are raised with no prior and deeper understanding of what it is to be a commoner in the homeland, of what it is to be an ordinary citizen in a barangay, from Bayan ng Itbayat, Lalawigan ng Batanes to Bayan ng Sitangkai, Lalawigan ng Sulu. It is very dangerous because FilAms yield more influence and power through their better access to resources, and yet these do not equate to cultural awareness.

Before Rizal’s political philosophy of Filipino, the ‘Filipino’ refers to a full-blooded Spaniard born in the Philippines, and since Spain follows jus sanguinis principle of citizenship, back then, ‘Filipino’ is as Spaniard as a ‘Madrileño’ (people in Madrid). The case in point is Marcelo Azcárraga Palmero - the Filipino Prime Minister of Spain.

But the word ‘Filipino’ was claimed by Rizal and the ilustrados to refer to whom the Spaniards call ‘indio’. The term was then applied retroactively to those who helped in the struggle. It was only later that Lapu-Lapu, Francisco Dagohoy, Gabriela and Diego Silang, Sultan Kudarat, Lorenzo Ruiz, and GOMBURZA were called Filipinos.

The word 'Filipino' was long fixed by the tears and sweat of martyrs through years of bloody history in the hands of traitors within and oppressors not just of the white race. The word Filipino is now used by men, women, and those who do not choose to be referred to as such who still bears a passport or any state document from the Republic of the Philippines. Whether a homelader is a Kapuso, Kapamilya, Kapatid, DDS, Dilawan, Noranian, Vilmanian, Sharonian, Team Magnolia, Barangay Ginebra, Catholic, Muslim, Aglipayan, Iglesia, Victory, Mormon, IP, OP, SJ, RVM, SVD, OSB, OSA, LGBTQQIP2SAA, etc., the word 'Filipino' is a constant variable in the formula of national consciousness.

Merriam-Webster defines Filipina as a Filipino girl or woman. Still a Filipino. Remember, dictionaries do not dictate rules. Dictionaries provide us with the meaning. To me, the word Filipina solidified as a subtle emphasis to the Philippines as a matriarchal country faking a macho look. But that’s not saying the word Filipino in the language is macho with six-pack.

The word Filipino is not resting its official status on the letter O but in its quiddity as a word and as an idea of a sovereign nation. The words Pilipino, Filipino, and Pinoy are not broken. What is broken is the notion that a Filipino subculture dictates the standard for political correctness without reaching the depth of our own history.

If the Filipinx-Pinxy-Pilipinx movement truly suits the Filipino-American struggle, my heart goes out for it. But my republic, the Philippines, home of the Filipino people, cradle of noble heroes, has no need for it (not just yet, maybe) - not because we don't want change, but because it will turn an already resolved theme utterly problematic. The Filipinos have no need for it, not because we cannot afford to consider political correctness when people are hungry, abused, and robbed off taxes. We could afford to legalize a formal way of Filipino greeting for purposes of national identity. But as far as the Filipinx, it should not be the homeland’s priority.

We may be poor, but we have culture.

From Julius Payàwal Fernandez's post

#Filipino #culture #Philippines #filipinx #pinxy #pinoy #filipina #pinay

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ravens-words · 4 years

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We burned down our paper house

"Spanning years and continents. Lives ruined, bloodshed. Epic."

Scenes from a lost decade.

Chapter 4 of 4

Warnings: Angst, Brief mentions of war, Jesse Manes.

...........................

October, 2015

"Hello?"

Michael's voice was groggy when he answered and it was obvious he'd been asleep and most likely didn't check who was calling when he picked up. Alex hadn't wanted to wake him, but getting to have these calls was a rare opportunity.

"Hey, Guerin," Alex whispered, making sure to keep his voice down. His teammates were scattered all around him in the tent, each one on a call with their own families.

"Alex?" He sounded more awake now. "How are you? Are you okay?"

"I'm alright. How are you?"

Michael let out a soft laugh and Alex matched it. Why talking on the phone was so awkward given who they were to each other was beyond him. "I'm okay. Been helping Isobel with her Halloween party decorations."

Alex relaxed back into his chair, grinning. "Oh? I bet you loved that."

"Oh yeah. I love spending two hours a day being bossed around by Isobel Evans."

Alex snorted. "What else have you been up to?"

"Not much, really." He cleared his throat. "How about you? How are things over there?"

Alex didn't want to answer that question. He didn't know how. "It's nothing much."

Michael was silent on the other end, and Alex closed his eyes, wondering if he'd managed to screw up so soon into this, whatever this was.

"Guerin-"

"I miss you," he blurted out. "I don't know if you can't talk about it or just don't want to, but I just want to know you're okay. That's why I ask."

Alex sighed and scrubbed a hand down his face. "I don't think I'll ever talk to you about what I'm doing here," he muttered gently. It wasn't meant to hurt him, but he wanted to make sure they were on the same page. Alex had killed people, and they weren't always bad, they weren't always evil. Sometimes this job weighed so heavily on his soul that he struggled to find a reason, a way, to keep going. He'd managed it so far, but it wasn't easy.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't ever want the way you look at me to change." He regretted the words instantly, but it was a relief to have them out in the open between them. It was a confession, a very small one that cost him more than it should've, but he knew Michael would understand the implication of it.

"Alex-"

"Tell me about your day," he requested, desperate and pleading. They had so little time, and he want to spend it discussing something he'd been running from for years now.

There was silence again, but then Michael sighed, resigned. "Okay. Well, old man Jackson's car broke again- and this makes it the third time this week, and he tried to convince me it was somehow my fault and not his crappy driving..."

Alex sat back, and listened to every word, committing his voice to memory.

Just three more years.

They could make it that long.

December, 2015

"Shit, jesus christ!"

Alex couldn't help but smile as Michael continued to curse, voice distant. He'd either put Alex on speaker or dropped his phone. "Guerin?"

"Alex, hey!" He could practically hear the grin in his voice and found himself smiling, helpless against the genuine joy he could hear in the other man's words.

"Hi," he uttered, quiet, the smile still clinging to his lips. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas." There was a short, comfortable silence and it struck Alex how much this, just this; listening to Michael breathe on the other end of a call, meant to him. "I wish you were here."

Somehow, Michael, quiet and reverent, had the unbelievable ability to make the simplest things sound like holy confessions only meant for Alex and it never failed to fill him with joy and frustration in equal measures. Alex had so many things- beautiful, poetic things- to say about Michael, about his heart, his smile, his eyes. But he could never share them, kept them trapped in a leather bound notebook that had been his companion for the better part of seven years now. He desperately wanted to tell him how much he meant to him, but writing the words down had always been much more easier than saying them.

"Alex?"

"I'm here. I'm here. What are you doing for Christmas? You're not spending it alone, are you?"

"No," Michael answered quickly. Too quickly. Alex's heart sank. "I'm spending it with Max, Iz and Noah. At least Max will be there, I won't have to be a third wheel."

He was trying to sound cheerful, no doubt for his benefit, but Alex could hear how it was forced.

"Guerin," he whispered, and he heard him take a deep breath. "Don't hide from me."

Michael let out a laugh that sounded a lot like a sob. "I don't want you to- I'm okay, Alex, really."

He should have proded him more. He shouldn't have let him pretend things were okay. He should have comforted him.

Instead of doing any of that, though, Alex let him hide. "Okay," he allowed. "Tell me how you've been. I missed you."

Michael's spirit lifted and Alex, feeling like a coward, was relieved. At least he'd managed to do some good for him.

Please, let that be enough.

January, 2016

Happy New Year's, Michael. I hope this year will be a good one- AM

Happy New Year's, Alex! I miss you. Any chance you'll be coming home soon? - MG

Not for at least six months. I'm sorry -AM

It's okay. Take care of yourself and stay safe, will you? -MG

March, 2016

When Michael answered the video call, he was smiling widely.

He was also shirtless.

Alex's eyes trailed down and it took a herculean effort to get them back up. When he managed it, though, Michael, the smug bastard, was smirking. "Like what you see?"

Alex rolled his eyes and felt his face heat up. He hoped to god his blush wasn't visible. From the wiggling eyebrows and the full blown smug smile he received, his prayers went unheard.

"I can't believe I finally managed to convince you to video call," Michael proded gently.

His tone wasn't accusing, but Alex felt guilty anyway. He hadn't told his teammates anything; not about Michael, and certainly not about him being gay. It seemed that trusting them with his life was a lot easier than trusting them with that part of himself.

There had been so many moments where he wanted to say it, to just put it out there and see what happened. But he always backed out last minute, instinct, old doubts and fears uniting and insuring his silence.

"Hey," Michael frowned, coming closer to the screen, as if the movement would bring them any closer. "Where'd you go?"

Alex smiled. "I'm here. Sorry, I zoned out."

"That's okay. Bad day?"

He shook his head. "A long one."

Michael hummed sympathetically. "Wanna talk about it?"

Alex shook his head. "Not really."

"Alright," he backed off immediately.

"You cut your hair," he found himself saying, just now noticing.

"Isobel made me," he grumpled, running a hand through the short curls. An ache, a need, to touch him, to be there beside him, threatened to overwhelm Alex and he found himself blinking back tears. "You like it?"

"Yeah," he breathed out.

Michael squinted, then his face softened. "Hey, what's going on?"

No, Alex wanted to say. I miss you. I want this to be over. I want to be there with you.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm okay." He tried to smile. "And- it looks good. You look good."

He was rewarded with a beaming smile.

April, 2016

"Happy birthday!" Alex cheered the minute Michael picked up.

"Hey, you." Michael laughed softly. "Thanks."

"Sorry I couldn't call you on your actual birthday."

"That's okay."

Alex frowned. "Hey, are you sure you're alright?"

"I am now that we're talking. It's been a while since we talked."

"I know. I'm sorry. Things have picked up here, I've barely slept in days."

"Are you safe?" He sounded scared, and Alex cursed himself for worrying him.

"I'm in a war zone, Guerin." The words were harsher than he intended and he closed his eyes the minute the words left his mouth, knowing he'd managed to make things worse. "I'm sorry," he blurted out when the silence became too much. "I just- I hate this. I wish I could be there."

"Yeah," Michael said, voice tight with either anger or resentment. Probably both. Or maybe something else entirely that Alex couldn't grasp. "Why won't you talk to me?"

"I talk to you whenever I can. I told you, it's-"

"Don't play dumb, Alex. You know what I mean."

"No," he argued. "I don't. I talk to you, Guerin."

"Not about anything that matters," he snapped. "Not about what's been going on with you. You think I don't see how tired you are? You think I don't hear how miserable you are? You think I don't-"

"I told you before, I don't want to talk about this, any of it," he told him, voice cold and devoid of emotions.

"Alex-"

"If this is how the call is going to be, I'm hanging up," he threatened and he hated it. He absolutely hated it. But he was desperate enough to fight dirty. Desperate enough to keep Michael separate from the hell he was in to use every weapon in his arsenal.

"Okay," Michael said, and the words cut a knife through his chest. He sounded resigned and bitter and Alex hated himself for causing that.

"Captain Manes!"

Alex closed his eyes and cursed silently. "I've gotta go."

"Yeah."

"I'l talk to you later?"

He let out a wary sigh. "Yeah."

.....

May, 2016

"Can I tell Isobel about us?"

The smile on Alex's face dropped and he swallowed thickly. "Guerin-"

He seemed to get what Alex was trying to say and made a noise that was halfway between a sigh and a scoff. "Forget it, that was stupid of me." Alex's blood ran cold, but he managed to keep his cool and ignore the bitterness that seemed to color the other man's words. There seemed to be a lot of that since their talk three weeks ago.

"Listen, I just don't want-"

"I get it," he snapped and Alex closed his mouth. "You don't want anyone to know."

"Guerin, I don't want him to know. That's why I don't want to tell anybody."

Trying to reason with a pissed off Michael proved to be a more difficult task than Alex anticipated and he was quickly running out of patience.

"Did you tell your teammates? About us?"

Alex's silence was enough answer and Michael laughed. "Of course you didn't. And it's not because of your dad, Alex. It's because you don't want anybody to know you're with me."

"That's not why and you know it!"

"No, I don't,"

All his father's beatings combined hurt less than the wounded tone of Michael's voice, and it only served to solidify Alex's belief that being with him hurt Michael. And he was smart enough to know a relationship wasn't supposed to be like that. Being with someone wasn't supposed to make you miserable all the time.

"You know, I can count the people I care about in that town on one hand and I'd have fingers to spare," he told him quietly.

Michael sighed tiredly. "I know."

"I only ever came back for you. Just you."

Michael was silent on the other end, but the breath that rushed out of him at Alex's words was very telling.

"I'm sorry," Alex muttered, trusting that Michael would understand why he was apologizing.

"It's okay."

It wasn't, not by a long shot, but Alex wasn't quite ready to face that particular truth yet. Instead, he smiled and decided to extend a peace offering of a sort.

"I think I might be able to come home next month."

"What?!" There was a little excitement creeping into his voice and Alex was relieved. "Seriously?"

"It's not set in stone, but- yeah, I think I'm coming back in a month or so."

"Good," Michael breathed out. "That's good."

.....

June, 2016

Alex sat down on his bed heavily and stared at the wall, ears ringing and unable to think, unable to breathe. He was supposed to be resting, but he doubted he would be able to sleep for a long time.

He moved to lay down when something solid dug in his hip. When his hands closed in on the sat. phone, a sticky note attached to it, he froze. He turned on the light and, with the room dimly lit, was able to read the note.

Today was fucking hard, cap. If you won't talk to us, then at least talk to someone. It was written in Bradley's careful handwriting and Alex closed his eyes, lest the tears that had been building up spilt out. He didn't know about Michael, no one did, but he could tell his teammates knew he had someone. He'd never denied it, but he'd never come out and said it. He was grateful to know that he didn't have to.

He absentmindedly played with the phone, and allowed himself only a few seconds to think of all the reasons he shouldn't talk to Michael after the day he'd had.

In the end, his need to hear Michael's voice won over any logical reasoning and he found himself dialing the number he'd memorized by heart. It rang five times before he answered.

"Alex?" Michael shouted over the sound of music, voice light and easy in a way it hadn't been in a while. Alex's heart sank when he realized that he hadn't heard Michael sound happy in months.

And that was on him.

He let out a shaky breath and answered. "Hey. This is a bad time, I'll-"

"No! No, hang on." Seconds later, there was the sound of a heavy thud, a door closed, and Michael's voice was back, much clearer. "Hey, I'm glad you called. I missed you."

"Yeah, you too," Alex managed to say, a lump in his throat.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"No," he admitted, "I'm not."

Michael was probably shocked into silence, having not expected an honest answer. "What happened?"

"I'm just tired." He took in a shaky breath and let it out slowly. "Will you talk to me?"

"About what?" Michael asked gently.

"Anything." I just want to hear your voice instead of their screams, he wanted to say but didn't.

So, he listened to Michael talk about his day, about Isobel and Max and a car repair job he'd done that had impressed Sanders enough that he'd actually said the words 'good job, kid' out loud. And, miraculously, little by little, he felt a sort of peace wash over him, and the pain of what had happened today lessened to a somewhat bearable level. It was a heavy burden that would be there forever, but talking to Michael made that burden easier to carry.

"Thank you," he interrupted him, voice quiet.

Michael laughed softly. "What for?"

For being the one good thing in my life right now. For keeping me sane. "For being you," he smiled.

Michael snickered. "Well, that's the first time anybody ever thanked me for that."

Alex found himself laughing with him, and the knot in his chest loosened.

July, 2016

Alex was beyond exhausted, beyond angry and desperate for this; the war and the killing and the endless cycle of nearly identical days, to be over. He'd been hopeful a week earlier, thinking he might be able to go see Michael, but his leave had been rejected, on account of his team being needed here. Michael hadn't been happy about it and though this had happened before, this time had felt different. They'd had a fight about it, and Alex hadn't heard from him in about a week.

Truth be told, Alex dreaded their next conversation so much that it was almost a relief when he called and Michael didn't pick up. Alex felt that there were cracks forming in this thing between them, probably due to how much they both left unsaid and the long distance between them probably wasn't helping. Sometimes, he felt like he was holding Michael back, making him miserable instead of happy, and wondered if maybe he needed to let him go. He could never say it outright, too scared of losing him, but he'd contemplated it.

When he called him, Michael answered on the second ring.

"Alex!"

And he was well on his way to getting well and truly drunk from the sound of it.

"Are you drunk? Guerin, Where are you?"

"I'm not drunk, Alex," he told him moodily. And Alex realized that no, Michael wasn't drunk, he just sounded happy. How messed up was it that he hadn't recognize his happiness and mistook it for drunkenness? "Noah threw a surprise party for Iz. It's their anniversary," he explained, words wistful, bitterness forgotten.

Alex bit his lip hard enough to draw blood. That was never going to be them, was it?

"What the hell, Alex?" Though his words were whispered, there was a cold fury in them that made his heart sink. "Are you serious?"

He said nothing. He hadn't meant to say the words out loud, but a part of him was relieved he had. This conversation was a long time coming.

Michael wanted a family. He'd never said it, but Alex could tell. He wanted to be with him, wanted everything with him, and though the feeling was mutual, Alex didn't see it happening for a long time, if ever. Not when Alex felt paralyzed any time he tried to tell his teammates about his relationship. Not when the mere idea of anybody finding out and word reaching his father sent him into a spiral that, more often than not, ended with him having a panic attack.

"It's true," he whispered, digging the knife deeper. "You were right, Guerin. I didn't tell anyone about us. I don't think I'll be able to any time soon."

"Alex-"

"Stop," he snapped, heart thumping wildly. A part of him recognized that he should cut the conversation short and talk to Michael later. When he wasn't feeling so raw; when he could look down at his hands and not see blood on them; when he could close his eyes and see something other than fire and hear something other than the screams of a hundred innocent people. "I'm not coming home, Guerin. Not for a while. And- this isn't working."

Michael cursed viciously, and the sound of something breaking reached his ears, but Alex was calm in a way that scared him. He knew what that calm meant; knew, deep down in his bones, that this was going to be the last conversation they were going to have for a long time.

If he was capable of feeling anything at the moment, Alex thought he might have felt sorrow.

"Alex, please talk to me. You don't- we're fine. We- what do you mean it's not working?"

He hated how desperate Michael sounded, how scared.

I did that. I did that to him.

"We should stop this," he informed him, and even to him the words sounded almost robotic.

"Alex, what-?"

Michael sounded confused and Alex didn't blame him.

"You can't tell me you haven't thought about it, Michael. We're- this thing between us, it wasn't going to last. It's not- all we do lately is fight, aren't you tired of it?"

He wasn't trying to be cruel, but he sure sounded like it.

"Of course I'm fucking tired of fighting with you, Alex! And it's not working because you won't talk to me. I've tried to get you to so many times but you're like a freaking brick wall," he hissed, then laughed hysterically. "I can tell you're off. I can tell you're hiding something. I can tell that you're in pain right now, but if I asked, would you tell me what happened?"

Alex was in pain, he was in so much pain that even his damn teeth ached, and he was tired. Maybe that was why he did the thing he'd vowed to never do and found himself telling Michael everything he'd been trying to keep hidden.

"I kill people for a living," Alex told him, cold and furious. Later, he was sure he was going to regret this, but for now, that didn't matter. "I've killed so many people; fathers, brothers, sons, husbands, d-" he cut himself off and breathed heavily, chest tightening. "I've got so much blood on my hands, and it feels like no matter what I do, I'm never going to be able to wipe it off."

There was a sharp intake of breath and a chocked sound that Alex couldn't identify over the sound of his pounding heart.

"Is that what you wanted to hear?" He demanded.

"Alex," all the fight had drained out of him, and the only thing left in his voice was sorrow.

Alex hated it.

"Tell me," he demanded, "is that what you wanted me to tell you? That I'm-"

"Stop," Michael begged. "Just stop."

He sucked in a breath and closed his eyes. "I'm sorry, Guerin."

Michael said nothing, probably because he'd understood that Alex was apologizing for more than this conversation. Then he let out a sharp breath. "So, this is it, huh?"

"I'm sorry."

"Stop saying that!"

He did. He didn't say anything at all; just listened to Michael breathe heavily and wondered how he could breathe at all when Alex felt like he was drowning.

"Is this really it?" He sounded small, and scared.

Alex remained silent. He closed his eyes and listened to him breathe.

"Fuck you, Alex." Michael raised his voice. He wasn't screaming, but it was close enough. "Did you ever even want this? From the minute you left, you've been- You won't tell me anything. We spent whatever time we had talking about stupid shit and you never let me in. You won't tell anyone about us because you're scared, but have you wondered how I feel, Alex?" He didn't have an answer for him and Michael didn't wait for one. "I'm terrified every day of something happening to you, every single day, and you know what the bitch of it is? If something does happen, half the town will know before I do and that's because no one would even think to tell me. And there's no one I can talk to about this because you don't want anybody to know. I sucked it up. For seven months, for even longer than that, I sucked it up and I didn't push, though god knows I wanted to. And now, just like that, you decide to end it?" When Alex didn't answer, Michael snapped. "Fucking say something, Alex."

"It's over. I'm sorry."

"Fuck you, Alex." In perfect contrast to the words, he sounded heartbroken, defeated.

For a brief instance, he wanted to take it all back and beg Michael to forget every word he'd said. But then the dile tone reached his ears and admist the heartbreak and shock, there was a sense of relief. It was short-lived, however, and soon, he found himself hunched forward, his hands tangled in his hair and his world was falling apart around him. He decided to give himself one minute. One minute to fall apart, to rage and cry and regret all the choices he'd made that had landed him here. Then, he did what he did best and gathered all those emotions, put them into neat little boxes and buried them in the deepest corners of his mind.

Michael had been a lifeline of a sort in these past few months, he'd helped more than he knew, and now that he was without that lifeline, Alex wondered how long it would take for him to stop drowning.

Continue on AO3

@benkouji726 tagging you because it won't show up in the tags and you (for some reason, lol) actually like this fic and have been waiting for this chapter (I hope you like it???)

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popmusicu · 4 years

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Most important Boybands in history for me

Boy bands have been an important part of pop culture for several decades, each generation has had its Boyband, these vocal groups formed by teenage boys, who sing and dance (there are exceptions), wear matching clothes and drive the girls crazy.

That's why I present some of the most important Boybands in history (some of my favorites and others that even though I'm not a fan I know several songs):

The jackson 5: Considered by many the first Boyband in history, this band formed by the African-American brothers from Gary,Indiana: Jackie, Tito, Jermaine, Marlon and Michael (from oldest to youngest) started in the mid 60s, driven by their father Joseph Jackson, playing in small bars and events in their town, until they were discovered by Motown Records where they began a successful career with Berry Gordy (owner of Motown) and Diana Ross, reaching the top of the U.S. charts with singles like "I Want You Back", "ABC", "The Love You Save" and "I'll Be There", without a doubt they were one of the most influential groups of the time, years later when they went to Epic Records they changed their name to "The Jacksons".

Well, last but not least, in the late 70's Michael Jackson started his solo career, which would lead him to become the most important artist in history and be known as the King of Pop.

Without a doubt, the Jackson Five are one of my favorites and I think most people know at least one of their songs.

J5 medley: https://youtu.be/-4QWtflqqoU

New Kids on the block: This group formed in 1984 by the brothers Jonathan Knight and Jordan Knight, Joey McIntyre, Donnie Wahlberg and Danny Wood from Boston, were a symbol for the boy bands that later in the 90s would succeed them.

They released their first album in 1986, but they jumped to the fame in 1988 with their album "Hangin' Tough" and even more with the release of "Step by step" in 1990 with which they became number 1 in the United States, but it didn't pass much time until in 1994 with the exit of Jonathan Knight, the group ended up separating.

After years in 2008 they announced that the group reunited, which made new tours and later between 2010 and 2012 with the Backstreet Boy made the NKOTBSB tour where they shared the stage singing the hits of both Boy bands, today they continue making music.

The NKOTBSB tour with 2 or more generations!

The Right Stuff: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbIEwIwYz-c

Backstreet boys: It is the most successful Boyband of all time (we must admit that everyone knows at least a couple of their songs), composed of AJ McLean, Howie Dorough, Brian Littrell, Nick Carter and Kevin Richardson, since 1993 when it was formed and after releasing its first album of the same name in 1996, has been a symbol of pop and one of the groups with more record sales in the history of music.

Regarding their music, they obtained their first success in Europe with "We've Got It Goin' On", and from there their popularity began to grow , until with "Quit Playing Games (With My Heart)" they managed to conquer the United States. By the end of the decade of the 90s they release what was their most successful album "Millenium" which debuted in the position n° 1 of Billboard 200 that includes their most successful song "I want it that way" (we all know it's song), then they continue with their album "Black and Blue", which they promoted by traveling the 5 continents in 100 hours, with which they obtained a Guinness record.

After several agitated years, the band decides to take a rest in 2002, although after 3 years they return with a new sound and new tour, but in 2006 Kevin decides to leave the band, reason why Nick, AJ, Brian and Howie decide to continue them 4 with BSB, after several years and new albums, the project NKOTBSB arises where they unite to the New Kids ON The Block to make a tour, in which they announce the return of Kevin to the quintet. Currently, they are still very active after releasing their album "DNA" , whose world tour was interrupted by the covid-19.

My favorite boyband by far, their way of being, their messages in their songs, their iconic choreographies and the power to deal with difficult situations that have been presented to them make me admire them and love each of their songs.

All I have to give: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pj6FCKm8dhM

N´ Sync: Considered in the 90s the rivals of the Backstreet Boys, this band composed by Chris Kirkpatrick, Joey Fatone, Lance Bass, JC Chasez and Justin Timberlake who until today continues with his successful solo career; it was created in 1995 by Lou Pearlman, had great success at the end of the 90s until his separation in 2002.

In addition to their great successes with songs like "Bye bye bye", "I want you back" or "Pop", they had the opportunity to work with important music celebrities like MJ, Aerosmith, Celine Dion, Elthon John among others, there is even a chapter of The Simpsons dedicated to them. One of the strongest features of N' Sync was the dance and its complex choreography.

For me, Justin was always the most outstanding of the group, that's why he continues to be an important artist to this day.

Bye bye bye: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eo-KmOd3i7s

One Direction: British Boyband was born in 2010 after Harry Styles, Liam Payne, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan and Louis Tomlinson, participated in Factor X, where Simon Cowell joined them and created one of the most successful bands of the decade of 2010, debuted with "What Makes You Beautiful" and since then were a phenomenon, filled stadiums, world tours, etc. In 2013 they released "Midnight Memories", which was the best selling album of that year, which contained songs like "Best Song Ever", "Story of My Life" which are some of the most heard songs of the band.

until 2015 when Zayn announced that he was leaving the band, so 1D was left with only 4 members, who in 2016 each began their solo projects, leaving the group on pause until today.

What this band was missing to call my attention, I think was that they didn't dance!

Best Song Ever: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_v9MY_FMcw

BTS: Although this band was formed in 2010 in South Korea and their debut was in 2013 is not until 2017 with the rise of K-pop that have become the most important group of this genre worldwide, formed by Jin, Suga, J-Hope, RM, Jimin, V and Jungkook have remained within the Billboard 200 for a long time with different songs like "DNA" or his EP "Love Yourself: Her", in addition to receiving several awards.

Even Time magazine recognized them as "Next Generation Leaders ", and they were included in the list of the most influential people in the world in 2019.

While this genre of pop is not my favorite, one of my favorite songs is Dynamite at first I was struck by its rhythm, but when I saw the video and all the references to MJ I loved a more.

Dynamite: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdZLi9oWNZg

Michelle Silva H.

#All time best #list #I love this #submission

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rhyslucia · 4 years

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If you're pro-military, you shouldn't vote for trump

"Some 489 national security experts — including 22 four-star officers — have endorsed Joe Biden for president.

'I believe the current administration is a real threat to the republic,' says Gen. Peter Chiarelli, who served as the Army's No. 2 officer before retiring in 2012. 'I had to stand up and be counted.'"

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If you're Christian, you shouldn't vote for trump

"While the president has delivered on some issues of concern to us, such as economic reforms and trade deals, his immigration policies are cruel, undermining his pledges to life and religious freedom. For instance, while we cherish unborn lives, we also value the lives of thousands of children who were separated from their mothers or fathers by the "zero tolerance" policies of the administration at the Mexican border in 2018.

Our commitment to life also compels us to do everything that we can to end human trafficking. The administration has decided to suspend the life saving elements of the Trafficking Victims Protection Reauthorization Act, the passage of which evangelical Christians proudly championed under George Bush and the flouting of which evangelical ministries like World Vision and International Justice Mission have decried.

Our convictions on life also are why we strongly believe the United States should continue to be, in the famous words of George Washington, "a safe and agreeable asylum to the virtuous and persecuted part of mankind, to whatever nation they might belong." Rather than continue the life saving tradition of asylum and resettlement of refugees, the administration has shut out persecuted refugees with its immigration policies."

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If you value American lives, you shouldn't vote for trump

“You just breathe the air and that’s how it’s passed,” he said in a Feb. 7 call with journalist Bob Woodward. “And so that’s a very tricky one. That’s a very delicate one. It’s also more deadly than even your strenuous flus.”

“This is deadly stuff,” he said.

At the time, Trump was telling Americans that the U.S. was in little danger and that the outbreak would soon go away on its own.

Asked about those statements in March, Trump said he wanted to downplay the threat. "I wanted to always play it down," Trump told Woodward. "I still like playing it down, because I don't want to create a panic."

In the same interview, he went on to acknowledge the gravity of the threat facing even young adults. "Just today and yesterday, some startling facts came out. It's not just old, older. Young people too, plenty of young people," Trump said.

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Are you, or have you ever met a woman? If so, you shouldn't vote for trump

Donald Trump, current president of the United States, has been accused of rape, sexual assault, and sexual harassment, including non-consensual kissing or groping, by at least 25 women since the 1970s.[1][2] The accusations have resulted in three much reported instances of litigation: his then-wife Ivana made a rape claim during their 1989 divorce litigation but later recanted that claim;[3] businesswoman Jill Harth sued Trump in 1997 alleging breach of contract while also suing for nonviolent sexual harassment but withdrew the latter suit as part of a settlement for relating to the former suit; and, in 2017, former The Apprentice contestant Summer Zervos filed a defamation lawsuit after Trump called her a liar.[4]

Trump in 2017

Two of the allegations (by Ivana Trump and Jill Harth) became public before Trump's candidacy for president, but the rest arose after a 2005 audio recording was leaked during the 2016 presidential campaign. Trump was recorded bragging that a celebrity like himself "can do anything" to women, including "just start kissing them ... I don't even wait" and "grab 'em by the pussy". Trump subsequently characterized those comments as "locker room talk" and denied actually behaving that way toward women, and he also apologized for the crude language. Many of his accusers stated that Trump's denials provoked them into going public with their allegations.

Another type of accusation was made, primarily after the audio recording surfaced, by several former Miss USA and Miss Teen USA contestants, who accused Trump of entering the dressing rooms of beauty pageant contestants. Trump, who owned the Miss Universe franchise, which includes both pageants, was accused of going into dressing rooms in 1997, 2000, 2001, and 2006, while contestants were in various stages of undress. Trump had already referred to this practice during a 2005 interview on The Howard Stern Show, saying he could "get away with things like that" because he owned the beauty pageants the women and girls were competing in.

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Do you support racism? If not, you shouldn't vote for trump

In unguarded moments with senior aides, President Trump has maintained that Black Americans have mainly themselves to blame in their struggle for equality, hindered more by lack of initiative than societal impediments, according to current and former U.S. officials.

After phone calls with Jewish lawmakers, Trump has muttered that Jews “are only in it for themselves” and “stick together” in an ethnic allegiance that exceeds other loyalties, officials said.

Trump’s private musings about Hispanics match the vitriol he has displayed in public, and his antipathy to Africa is so ingrained that when first lady Melania Trump planned a 2018 trip to that continent he railed that he “could never understand why she would want to go there.”

When challenged on these views by subordinates, Trump has invariably responded with indignation. “He would say, ‘No one loves Black people more than me,’ ” a former senior White House official said. The protests rang hollow because if the president were truly guided by such sentiments he “wouldn’t need to say it,” the official said. “You let your actions speak.”

In Trump’s case, there is now a substantial record of his actions as president that have compounded the perceptions of racism created by his words

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Do you enjoy advances made by science? If so, you shouldn't vote for trump

The Trump administration and 115th Congress have been actively dismantling science-based health and safety protections, sidelining scientific evidence, and undoing recent progress on scientific integrity.

Below is a running list of attacks on science—disappearing data, silenced scientists, and other assaults on scientific integrity and science-based policy. The list provides a representative sample of threats to the federal scientific enterprise.

FDA Now Lacks Authority to Halt Use of Inaccurate Coronavirus Tests

In a move strongly opposed by FDA officials, the agency will no longer use science-based checks to regulate a broad swathe of laboratory tests, including coronavirus tests.

CDC Coronavirus Testing Guidelines Were Modified by Political Officials to be Less Scientific

The White House’s Coronavirus Task Force and HHS changed the novel coronavirus testing guidelines on the CDC website to fall out of line with the best available science.

EPA Refuses to Regulate Rocket Fuel Chemical in Drinking Water

The EPA has officially announced that it will not regulate perchlorate, a common ingredient of explosives and rocket fuel, in the nation’s drinking water supplies.

Fetal Tissue Research Blocked by a Biased Advisory Committee

13 out of 14 NIH grants submitted since September 2019 that involve fetal tissue are likely to be rejected based solely on the recommendations of the Human Fetal Tissue Research Ethics Advisory Board at the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS).

White House Demands Rewriting of CDC’s COVID-19 Guidelines for Schools

Vice President Mike Pence ordered the CDC to rewrite their school opening guidelines for reasons that appeared to be primarily political.

Trump Administration Takes Away Hospitalization Data From the CDC

The Administration mandated that hospitals bypass the CDC and send data on COVID-19 hospitalizations, to a private third party.

Trump Administration Endangered People Evacuating From Coronavirus-Infected Cruise Ship

State Department officials overrode science-based concerns of CDC officials and allowed 14 infected people to board an airplane with over 300 non-infected people

White House Hides Economic Analysis Showing COVID-19 Downturns

The White House will forego the publication of an economic analysis on budget projections in the summer of 2020.

NOAA Fisheries is Restricting the Use of the Words “COVID-19” and “Pandemic”

An official memo, issued by NOAA, stated that the agency’s “preferred approach” is making “no reference to anything COVID related” in public-facing documents.

Trump Administration Buries COVID-19 Information For Religious Communities

White House officials instructed the CDC to delete certain sections of a COVID-19 guidance measure for communities of faith

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Sorry I forgot to copy over my sources, but it's very easy to Google and find, just, all the reasons to not vote for trump. If you're feeling apathetic or like your vote doesn't matter, it does. If nothing else your vote will stick it to the egotistical, thin skinned, racist, misogynistic, hateful, lying, fascist ass-hat. If not for love of the country or hope for the future, get out and vote out of hate of who trump is and what he stands for. #VoteHimOut

#votehimout #vote him the fuck out #2020 election #votevotevote #trump2020 #president trump #biden2020

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drcaleasesmith · 4 years

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White Supremacy: The Never-Ending Pandemic

The world is in the midst of another health crisis -- a pandemic of the virus with the names, "Covid-19," "Coronavirus," and "CV," from the category of Corona viruses of which the common cold is also a member. It portents a staggering mortality rate not unlike earlier pandemics.

The nation and the world grappled with its last pandemic back in 2009, when H1N1 Influenza aimed itself at its populace. According to the Centers for Disease Control, before this pandemic was declared under control, it claimed between about 150,000 and 575,000 lives worldwide. Certainly not the worst pandemic in world history or the United States, it stands in history as a lethal legacy of the power of nature to exact itself upon humanity however it pleases, whenever it pleases. However, this is not an essay on the flu or CV. It is about pandemics, and one in particular, white supremacy.

In order to make this essay make sense, there needs to be some understanding about pandemics. According to Dictionary.com, a pandemic means: "prevalent throughout an entire country, continent, or the whole world; epidemic over a large area," largely associated with disease or illness. But what constitutes an illness or disease if discussing white supremacy and racism? Are the terms, white supremacy and racism really synonymous within the lexicon of the language we use to describe, define and associate ourselves? In order to make this essay make sense, these two terms must finally take their place as separate but equal, distinct and purposeful, and made unique in their own particular right.

There is no argument and indeed no debate should exist at this point about the pervasiveness of Racism, or its definition as "the systematic subjugation within established institutions in the U.S. through structurally designed denial and limited apportionment of opportunity, equity, equality and justice, to control the formerly enslaved and their descendants after the Enslavement ended," or that it "operates as power plus prejudice and bigotry in the form of White and Whiteness as 'superior,' and the "Black" formerly enslaved and their descendants as 'inferior'." What is still up for grabs in terms of intellectual debate is the ideology of white supremacy, what it means, what it does, how it operates, and why it is easily conflated with Racism.

By contrast, there doesn't seem to be any true scholarly acknowledgement as to any pathology of white supremacy or the association of mental processes which have been ingrained for centuries in people who identify as white in order to sustain and support the beliefs and subsequent behaviors that arise out of the ideology. In other words, white supremacy is not even considered a sickness of the mind. In fact, most scholars dismiss the idea of white supremacy as a pathological ideology altogether. Given that the ideology over the generations has glued itself into the subconscious as well as the unconscious places in the minds of white people, creating behaviors from subtle biases to full on aggression and violence, the absence of any correlation between the behaviors borne of the ideology and the notion of these behaviors is notable. It is telling that the study of white supremacy as a mental disorder is not pursued as possibly being due to a pathology of the mind, and is in itself, most likely because of the same construct of "superiority" already inherent in the ideology, in essence, why study what is already perfect?

According to Chauncey DeVega, writing for Alternet:

White supremacy is a complex social phenomenon. It is also a relatively new invention that was created to make Europe’s efforts to colonize and conquer the world seem like a “natural” process wherein “superior” white races would dominate “inferior” non-whites.

The Transatlantic slave trade was pivotal for the invention of race by creating a sense of group stigma and a belief in the concrete biological differences between white Europeans and Africans.

Mr. DeVega alluded to white supremacy as a complex social phenomenon and invention. I would disagree to the extent that the ideology, while complex and social, was an "invention," but that the system of racism was itself the "invention" created to sustain the ideology created by the wealthy landowners, and which, today, has morphed into a pandemic of narcissism and pathological aggression among people who identify with the whiteness ideology.

Two scholars, Christopher Petrella, Ph.D., and Justin Gomer, Ph.D., who coauthored a piece entitled, "White Supremacy Is Not an Illness," for the "African American Intellectual History Society's (AAIHS) segment on Black Perspectives, were adamant in their assertions that white supremacy is not an illness. Absent from the discussion, however, was the distinction of white supremacy as fundamentally separate from the system of racism, and the conflation of both as one and the same. While acknowledging that prior to the 1950s both terms were considered synonymous, it is clear that the ideology had to exist well BEFORE the system that supports it. What these two white scholars missed is the whiteness-centered nature of their argument.

Nevertheless, under their rationale in discussions with white people on the subject in an attempt to justify their assertion that white supremacy is not an illness, they referenced racism as their argument for or against, and only casually referred to white supremacy, not even within the same context. They then blithely acknowledged systemic racism as being ignored in favor of individual, "bad apples," and as a "misdiagnosis." It was obvious these two white scholars, albeit with Doctoral degrees in African American studies, and writing for a segment on Black Perspectives, lacked the Black perspective necessary to understand the difference between the terms.

"The presumption that one can eliminate racism by snuffing out a few “bad apples” misses the mark. In fact, such a paradigm misdiagnoses the systemic and ideological production of race itself which is squarely centered in white supremacy. "

Background Facial Image: "Deep Thought," 16x20 by TK Canvases

By implicitly conflating the terms white supremacy and racism as the same, they completely dissolve the systemic structures built into all of the institutions of human activity. They dismiss the very system of racism itself, and relegates racism as ONLY individual bad, and bigoted behaviors of people, while not allowing for exactly what caused the behaviors. Anyone who can critically think about these behaviors will soon come to the conclusion they are more attributed to white supremacist attitudes and the aggressive pathologies associated with them, rather than what was developed to uphold those behaviors. Moreover, while they described the term, "racism" as not being a disease and not an illness, this can only be ascribed as true because Racism is really NOT the behavior itself, but the system upon which the behavior is supported and sustained, and white supremacy is the catalyst which spawned and imposed a spectrum of mental disorders on an entire race of people with no desire to cure them.

Dr. Frances Cress Welsing, a psychiatrist and scholar, was one of a very few, if any, who acknowledged white supremacy as a "neuroses." Although she used white supremacy and racism interchangeably, she understood that the ideology of white supremacy itself was the overarching substance of any rational argument on white supremacy as a disorder, and therefore having a pathology. I would add that it is actually the separation of the two terms: one as the ideology which formed the negative, aggressive and malevolent behavioral pathologies among the masses of people who identify with it, and the other as the system designed and developed to sustain these behavioral pathologies and the ideology that spawned the behaviors in the first place, and provides the legitimacy and justification for the ideology to have contributed to generations of white narcissists and sociopaths of varying degrees of illness.

It is important to begin to see each of the terms, white supremacy and racism for their own unique place and order to properly engage in meaningful discussions of each and to understand which term came first. Had it not been for the creation of the ideology of white supremacy, there would never have been a need for a structural system to sustain it, and millions of people would never have been stricken through this neverending pandemic.

Sources:

Encyclopedia Britannica (2020). When Was the Last Pandemic?

Alternet (2020). 10 Things Everyone Should Know about White Supremacy

AAIHS (2016}. White Supremacy Is Not an Illness.

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doomedandstoned · 5 years

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Doom Around The World!

~By Billy Goat~

More? Your ears are hungry for more doom? Well doom I have, my beloved Doomers & Stoners. Here is a carefully curated menu of downtuned delectables from around the globe that will keep your stereo running hot and your internal organs rumbling from righteous riffs and reverberating rhythms. Enough preamble! It's time...to...DOOM!

☿

Angola

Depois da Meia Noite by Kishi

Well this is a definite first for me: doom from the Republic of Angola, which for the geographically challenged is lodged on Africa's West Coast. Doom coming straight from the African continent intrigues me. Maybe it's because it's home to so much of human history, not to mention an enduring fascination with its wildlife and unforgiving terrain that goes back to childhood. That said, stoner-doom must still be judged on the merits, so how does KISHI measure?

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Well, I'm happy to say that Angola's "first stoner rock line-up" is as gritty and down to earth as you could hope for. For the first time in a review, I want to use the word idiosyncratic, too. "Song themes pass between Angolan urban legends and existential reflections," the band writes. Legends? I love legends! Kishi add that Depois da Meia Noite also explores our hedonistic tendencies, presenting a perspective on humans as "incomplete and complex," so you've got some depth to the writing there, too.

Of course, you'll need to brush up on your Portuguese to take in the message, for at least a few of the tracks, but that adds to the charm for me -- and it sure didn't stop me from banging my head! I mean, how can you resist the idea of "getting stoned with Death"? For fans of Prong and Sepultura, as well as the sludgier side of stoner-doom. Don't miss the fan video for the doomiest number on the record about the goddess of the sea, "Kianda."

Brazil

Commanded By Cosmic Forces by Son of a witch

The doom metal scene, however much it is criticized for its long marriage to witches and wizards, will always find an enduring fascination with the dark world of fantasy and the mysteries of the occult. SON OF A WITCH have at least been at it longer than some, now nearing their 12th year together, with feet planted firmly in the Black Sabbath school. Maintaining that gloomy vibe up in a place that looks like paradise (Natal, right there on the tip of Brazil, facing out into the South Atlantic waters) is in and of itself a feat worthy of respect.

The fierce, soaring vocals of Nelson Macedo are still a highlight, uniting an absolutely tight team of two incredibly capable guitarists, a bassist that looms larger than life, and a commanding drummer. If you count 2016's Thrones In The Sky among your favs, 'Commanded By Cosmic Forces' (2019) will absolutely do it for your doom fix. Don't miss the last minute-and-a-half of "Dry Leaves."

Bulgaria

Dementify II by Dementify

Even though I'm a pianist, I've always had a problem with hearing piano in my doom, unless used as a harsh, percussive instrument, all Bela Bartok style. One band may be helping to change my mind: Sofia's atmospheric collective, DEMENTIFY. I can see the appeal of the piano in this death-doom hybrid, not so much for its beauty as for how it enhances -- at times, even carries -- the narrative. In other words, there's a story-telling quality to my beloved instrument, even if the keyboard is utilized in the most fundamental (read: effective) of ways.

Canada

Sublunar Express by Sublunar Express

As this is both Doomed and Stoned, it's only fitting we look at a band that does a fantastic job of incorporating these nuances within the framework of '80s-style krautrock and shoegaze. Influenced by Mogwai and Ween, SUBLUNAR EXPRESS is a kind of perpetual motion locomotive of the psychedelic deep sea.

"The moonlight reveals a train that travels only in the darkness," writes the band in reference to the five tracks before us. "Simultaneously moving through endless space and bottomless depths, the sound of a thunderous engine disturbs the chilling solitude, and the strange creatures once lurking in obscurity." The juxtaposition of light and darkness is masterfully illustrated by Joan Llopis Doménech. A great palette cleanser in between puffs of Electric Wizard and Sleep, and a chill spin overall.

China

Old Time Revival by Ramblin' Roze

Trade wars may be at their height, but one thing China is exporting well is stoner rock. You heard me right. The ripple of the heavy underground is not dissuaded by tariffs or tough talk. It's time to rock with smooth and sassy Beijing band RAMBLIN' ROZE.

"What we want to express is very simple," the band says, "Recall the very moment when rock n' roll was sending the first shiver down your spine." A track like "Down By The River" (or my fav "Marlboro & Cherrystone") will definitely do the trick.

France

MELT by Melt

Don't let the gentle strumming and '90s alt rock beat of "Cypher" put you off your guard. This song and the band's self-titled debut reveal a fiery heart that can singe yours if you get too close. Yet here I am, like moth to flame, unable to resist Toulouse's MELT, a band "rooted in the power of metal and inspired by the tenderness and melancholia of the soul." This allure in no small part to the raw emotion of singer Shiro who can really bring the pain and tug on those heartstrings.

Germany

Teeth Fletcher by 100000 Tonnen Kruppstahl

Berlin's 100000 TONNEN KRUPPSTAHL are back and if you didn't know they'd been away to begin with, it's time you got acquainted with their back catalog, but not before you dive into this impressive monolith doom. It's themes develop and loop, not unlike the characteristic compositional style of Sleep's seminal masterwork. Impressive for a band that used to be all about one-to-three-minute gore-violence ditties.

If there's any comparison to be made with Dopesmoker, it's that this is the second caravan that followed a mirage that led straight to the Sarlac's gullet, where they are now screaming in agonizing pain (listen for it in the first movement). Trust me, all this is a good thing, for I am the Sarlac and relished every moment of this savage morsel (though I did break a few teeth on that tough Krupp steel)!

Singapore

Unstructured Dissemination by O n s e t

Atmospheric doom duo ӨПƧΣƬ was formed by Mirai "Calvin" Kawashima on guitars and darkwave prodigy Shamtos (aka Microchip Terror) on synth, bass, and drums. The band told me they "were craving to create music that had a more crawling tempo," finding that "ringed-out, sustained chords on the guitar have a very satisfying rumble."

Unstructured Dissemination, their debut EP on the Weird Truth Productions label explores themes of disease and human suffering, the two-piece sharing a particular fascination for the Black Death. If you dig the vibe, keep your antenna tuned to ӨПƧΣƬ for the release of their first long-play, coming later this year. "Perhaps some people think that playing slow music is ‘easy and boring’ to play," ӨПƧΣƬ adds, "but that’s completely untrue. It requires the same amount of focus and concentration. In fact, we’re always pretty exhausted after a rehearsal session."

South Africa

Return to Worm Mountain by Return to Worm Mountain

From Duncan Park, the mind behind South Africa's Demons from the Dungeon Dimension (which kicked off my whole fascination with the scene there, culminating in our compilation Doomed & Stoned in South Africa ), comes RETURN TO WORM MOUNTAIN.

Duncan, now collaborating with drummer Cam Lofstrand (he of Durban band Black Math), refers to the new project as "a more experimental, psychedelic, garage rock type of band." There's some punk in there, I hasten to add, and a little bit of synthwave and shoegaze. Like he said: "experimental." The music captures the trippy vibe and the Dr. Seuss ambiance of Cam Lofstrand's album art quite well. A record equally fun as it is fascinating.

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newstfionline · 8 months

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Wednesday, January 10, 2024

2023 Broke Records to Become the Hottest Year (NYT) The numbers are in, and scientists can now confirm what month after month of extraordinary heat worldwide began signaling long ago. Last year was Earth’s warmest by far in a century and a half. Global temperatures started blowing past records midyear and didn’t stop. First, June was the planet’s warmest June on record. Then, July was the warmest July. And so on, all the way through December. Averaged across last year, temperatures worldwide were 1.48 degrees Celsius, or 2.66 Fahrenheit, higher than they were in the second half of the 19th century, the European Union climate monitor announced on Tuesday. That is warmer by a sizable margin than 2016, the previous hottest year.

Skipping School: America’s Hidden Education Crisis (ProPublica) Absenteeism has long been a problem in the Detroit area, as in other places with high poverty rates, but since the coronavirus pandemic it has worsened dramatically. Nationwide, the rate of chronic absenteeism—defined as missing at least 10% of school days, or 18 in a year—nearly doubled between 2018-19 and 2021-22, to 28% of students, according to data compiled for The Associated Press by Thomas Dee, a professor of education at Stanford. Michigan’s rate was 39%, the third highest among states. Some cities have rates of more than 40%. Absenteeism underlies much of what has beset young people in recent years, including falling school achievement, deteriorating mental health—exacerbated by social isolation—and elevated youth violence and car thefts, some occurring during school hours. The issue has also attracted surprisingly little attention from leaders, elected or otherwise, and education coverage in the national media has focused heavily on culture-war fights.

Oregon schoolteacher finds missing Boeing plane part in backyard trees (Reuters) Schoolteacher Bob Sauer said he took a flashlight to his tree-filled backyard on Sunday evening on the small chance he might find a plane part that had torn off an Alaska Airlines jet on Friday at an altitude of about 16,000 feet. “In the flashlight beam I could see that there was something gleaming white underneath the trees in the back that isn’t normally there,” Sauer told Reuters. Sauer had found a panel known as a mid-cabin door plug that is used to replace an exit that would be installed on planes configured to carry more passengers. Sauer, a science teacher whose students had just been learning about the physics principles of impulse and momentum, said his trees had acted like an air bag. “I don’t think the door was damaged at all by the fall,” he said.

Explosion at historic Texas hotel injures 21 and scatters debris in downtown Fort Worth (AP) An explosion at a historic Texas hotel in Fort Worth on Monday blew out windows, littered downtown streets with large sections of debris from the building and injured 21 people, including one who was in critical condition, authorities said. The blast flung doors and entire sections of wall onto the road in front of the 20-story hotel, where authorities said rescue crews found several people trapped in the basement. Fifteen people were taken to hospitals, including six whose conditions were described as “semi-critical.” Authorities said they believe a gas leak caused the explosion.

Ecuador declares state of emergency, curfew after gang leader escapes prison (CNN) Ecuador's President Daniel Noboa declared a nationwide 60-day state of emergency and a nightly curfew after the convicted leader of powerful gang Los Choneros vanished from his maximum security cell in Guayaquil. José Adolfo Macías Villamar, better known as “Fito,” was sentenced in 2011 to 34 years in prison for various crimes including drug trafficking and murder.

Europe Is Guzzling More American Oil Than Ever (WSJ) Tankers carried a record haul of U.S. oil to Europe last month, solidifying America's role as the continent's energy backstop. The European Union and United Kingdom imported nearly 2.3 million barrels of crude a day in December, according to ship-tracking firm Kpler, nearly double the amount they did in the months before Russia's invasion of Ukraine whipsawed markets.

A new PM (Foreign Policy) French President Emmanuel Macron appointed Education Minister Gabriel Attal to be the nation’s next prime minister on Tuesday after former leader Élisabeth Borne unexpectedly resigned on Monday. At age 34, Attal is France’s youngest prime minister in history. Attal has promised to address rising cost of living and public discontent at a time when far-right leader Marine Le Pen is gaining popularity. He is the first openly gay prime minister in Paris’s history and has been one of the highest-polling politicians in France over the past few months. Macron is likely hoping that Attal’s popularity will help stem growing disunity within his own centrist government.

Exhausted and on the Defensive in Ukraine (NYT) Under the cover of darkness, leaning forward under the weight of packs and rifles, a squad of soldiers walked along a muddy lane and slipped into a village house. Stolid men in helmets and rubber boots, they listened in silence as an intelligence officer briefed them on a new route in to their positions. “Morale is all right,” said the deputy battalion commander, standing nearby to see the men off. “But physically we are exhausted.” Ukrainian troops along most of the 600-mile front line are officially in defensive mode. But Russian forces are now on the offensive. Ukrainian soldiers and commanders said that Russian attacks were so intense that operating near the frontline has never been so dangerous. Russia has in recent days turned its focus to bombing Ukraine’s big cities to wear down civilians; for weeks its ground forces have been mounting attacks to claw back territory lost last summer and to seize long-prized Ukrainian redoubts along the eastern front. Well accustomed to Russian artillery fire, soldiers said that since March they had suffered the additional devastating power of glide bombs, half-ton explosives unleashed from planes that smash through underground bunkers.

Hong Kongers in Taiwan firmly support the ruling party after watching China erode freedoms at home (AP) As Taiwan’s presidential election approaches, many immigrants from Hong Kong, witnesses to the alarming erosion of civil liberties at home, are supporting the ruling Democratic Progressive Party. Beijing’s crackdown on dissent in the financial hub has cemented their preference for a party committed to preserving Taiwan’s de facto independence and democratic values ahead of the Jan. 13 vote. While Taiwanese immigration policies have been less welcoming than some from Hong Kong anticipated, most remain steadfast in their support for the DPP, largely due to the party’s firm stance on autonomy from Beijing, according to interviews. Following Beijing’s imposition of a national security law on Hong Kong in 2020, Taiwan has stood out as a haven for free speech and liberties in the Chinese-speaking world. Over the last three years, tens of thousands of Hong Kongers have migrated to the self-ruled island.

The cost of war over Taiwan (Bloomberg) War over Taiwan would have a cost in blood and treasure so vast that even those unhappiest with the status quo have reason not to risk it. Bloomberg Economics estimate the price tag at around $10 trillion, equal to about 10% of global GDP—dwarfing the blow from the war in Ukraine, Covid pandemic and Global Financial Crisis. In the case of a war: Taiwan’s economy would be decimated. Based on comparable recent conflicts, Bloomberg Economics estimates a 40% blow to GDP. A population and industrial base concentrated on the coast would add to the human and economic cost. With relations to major trade partners turned off and no access to advanced semiconductors, China’s GDP would suffer a 16.7% blow. For the US, further from the center of the action but still with a lot at stake—through the reliance of Apple on the Asian electronics supply chain, for example—GDP would be down 6.7%.

Israeli Strikes in Lebanon Kill Hezbollah Commander (NPR) As U.S. Secretary of State Anthony Blinken continues his peacekeeping mission in the Middle East, his allies in Israel seem hell-bent on undoing his diplomatic efforts in real time. On Monday, the IDF fired off an airstrike into southern Lebanon, killing an elite Hezbollah commander in the blast. The bombardment is the latest development in a larger exchange of airstrikes at the border by both Hezbollah and the IDF. According to an anonymous Lebanese security official, the airstrike hit an SUV transporting a commander of Hezbollah’s border forces. Hezbollah has identified the man as Wissam al-Tawil, the most senior militant within the group to have been killed since last October. Just last week, Israel killed a Hamas leader in the Lebanese capital of Beirut via airstrike; this attack will ratchet tensions up one step further as Blinken continues his efforts to stop the conflict from spreading.

Israel’s Gaza war leads to a massacre of journalists (Washington Post) Wael al-Dahdouh is one of the most well-known faces in Gaza—and he has become a symbol of the embattled territory’s calamity. While reporting during the early stages of the conflict, the veteran correspondent for Al Jazeera learned that the airstrikes he had covered from the ground all day had killed his wife, two of his children and an infant grandson. Over this weekend, tragedy struck again when another apparent Israeli drone strike killed his son, Hamza al-Dahdouh. According to a tally maintained by the Committee to Protect Journalists, at least 79 journalists and media workers have been killed since the start of the war on Oct. 7. Local Palestinian authorities put that number above 100. By one estimate, 1 out of every 10 journalists in the Gaza Strip has already been killed.

Israel said it had begun a less intense phase of the war (NYT) Israel announced that its military had begun a new and less intense phase of its war against Hamas, after weeks of pressure to curtail its large-scale ground and air campaign. Israeli officials privately told their American counterparts they hoped the transition would be completed by the end of the month. The new phase would involve fewer airstrikes and fewer troops on the ground, a spokesman for Israel’s military said. Israel is also expected to rely more on small groups of elite forces to find and kill Hamas leaders, rescue hostages and destroy tunnels in Hamas’s southern and central strongholds. “We can expect more targeted operations rather than wide maneuvers,” Patrick Kingsley, our Jerusalem bureau chief, told us. “Whether that alleviates civilian suffering remains to be seen. The strikes are clearly still continuing, killing scores every day.”

Scientists find about a quarter million invisible nanoplastic particles in a liter of bottled water (AP) The average liter of bottled water has nearly a quarter million invisible pieces of ever so tiny nanoplastics, detected and categorized for the first time by a microscope using dual lasers. Scientists long figured there were lots of these microscopic plastic pieces, but until researchers at Columbia and Rutgers universities did their calculations they never knew how many or what kind. Looking at five samples each of three common bottled water brands, researchers found particle levels ranged from 110,000 to 400,000 per liter, averaging at around 240,000 according to a study in Monday’s Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. These are particles that are less than a micron in size. There are 25,400 microns—also called micrometers because it is a millionth of a meter—in an inch. A human hair is about 83 microns wide.

#headlines #news

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spencerlakeland-blog · 5 years

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New Pop Music Is Turning into Extremely Miserable

Are we speculated to hate the pop songs in ‘A Star Is Born'? One of the primary strengths of ‘Yeah Yeah Yeah' is that the writer's love for the music is obvious all through, his own voice and opinions are clearly acknowledged however by no means intrusive. Stanley is able to take us by way of fifty years of chart successes, the skills that had been fulfilled and those who have been squandered, the impressed touches of genius and the awkward failures, with out ever letting his personal infectious enthusiasm drop. The lives and works of a few of the most well-known individuals on the planet, in addition to loads of those that loved nothing like the identical level of recognition, are instructed to us in a gentle flow of details, anecdotes, and never failing to incorporate the US and UK chart place for each song that is talked about. In his artistic profession, Vidmantas Bartulis (b.1954) has traversed many fields, maneuvring between intimate chamber compositions and large taking place-sort tasks, tutorial and in style tradition, sacred music and the theatre of the absurd. Musicians in bizarre masks, surrealist sceneries, bitter smells in the corridor, threatening avalanches of digital sounds, radio noises, banging of microphones, fireworks, circus numbers, repetitions of funeral rites - this is what one can see and listen to in his compositions of 'instrumental theatre'. Typically the composer himself goes onstage and performs one of many central roles, as in his chamber opera "The Lesson" (after a play of Ionesco), where he theatrically conducts singing actors alongside with his strange virtual orchestra. I find roman chord transitions far more useful like shown under, as a result of they will use any key, they usually present the commonest movements in music. Beneath is his entire examine summed up in a simple state diagram utilizing roman notation that works for any key. These arenвЂt technically all those choices, just the most common ones. Using C major in the below diagram could be: I = C, ii=d, iii=e, IV=F, V=G, vi=a, vii=b(diminished) the place a capitol letter is a Main chord and lowercase is minor chord.

Blues shuffles or strolling bass reinforce the trance-like rhythm and name-and-response, they usually kind a repetitive impact called a groove Attribute of the blues since its Afro-American origins, the shuffles played a central role in swing music 28 The best shuffles, which were the clearest signature of the R&B wave that began in the mid-Forties, 29 were a three-notice riff on the bass strings of the guitar. When this riff was performed over the bass and the drums, the groove "feel" was created. Shuffle rhythm is usually vocalized as "dow, da dow, da dow, da" or "dump, da dump, da dump, da": 30 it consists of uneven, or "swung", eighth notes. On a guitar this may be performed as a easy steady bass or it may add to that stepwise quarter notice movement from the fifth to the sixth of the chord and back.

Today, nonetheless, most of those American piano makers have ceased operation, and unwanted wooden pianos lie in garbage dumps. In at present's 21st-century American houses, pianos are often thought of furnishings: sales of new acoustic pianos in 2016 were down 88% from the 282,000 units sold in 1978, in keeping with the Blue E book of Pianos. Younger generations appear to want a version of the instrument that is both transportable and cheaper to buy (the National Affiliation of Music Merchandisers reported sales of 1.2m digital keyboards in 2015, in contrast with fewer than 40,000 acoustic pianos). It is simpler for skilled musicians to move a keyboard than a 500lb piano. Songwriters on the move can compose on laptops. It is less a rejection of the piano's sound than of its cumbersome physical kind. For decades, we have been instructed that positive thinking is the key to a contented, rich life. "Fk positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let's be sincere, shit is fked and we have now to stay with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn't sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it's—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest fact that's sorely missing right now. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fk is his antidote to the coddling, let's-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. A pioneering reggaetonero and rapper from Puerto Rico, Tego Calderón helped break reggaeton internationally along with his downtempo occasion traditional, Pa' Que Retozen", produced by DJ Joe and Rafy Mercenario. The lead single off his seminal debut album, El Abayarde, this gradual-winding dance flooring favorite was one of many first reggaeton songs to crack the United States market - and when the indie rapper's supply could not meet increasingly global calls for, his album was bootlegged throughout continents. (That's, till Sony BMG stepped in to distribute in 2003.) Tego's formal introduction to the game not solely helped revolutionize Puerto Rican music in North America, but also worldwide. M.E. PachelbelвЂs Canon is up there with BeethovenвЂs Ninth in the competition for the classical musicianвЂs вЂњI Am Going To Kill Myself If I Have To Hear This Goddamn Thing One More TimeвЂќ Cup. ItвЂs a nice sufficient tune if youвЂve by no means had to play it and youвЂre not paying specific attention. However itвЂs basically 10 secondsвЂ price of chords set on a close to-infinite loopвЂ"for perspective, it takes Lambchop about 15 seconds to get by one cycle of вЂњ The Tune That DoesnвЂt EndвЂќ Even with out Shari Lewis, the Canon can get very grating very quickly.

Rock and roll introduced with it the electrical guitar, and Beatlemania may be spotted all through Japan. By way of the recognition of each a brand new sub-style of kayoukyoku known as "Group Sounds" sprang up, although its tenure was tenuous at greatest. Group Sounds attempted to recreate the rock band motif with Japanese musicians, however controversy abounded when members argued about whether or not or not rock and roll could possibly be accomplished in Japanese. Many bands struggled to achieve a foothold as they debated between singing in English or Japanese. Eventually Group Sounds died away for just a few years when nobody could give you a transparent reply. Again in 2001, American sound and www.magicaudiotools.com visual artist Steven Roden coined and inadvertently created a style of utmost and minimal type of ambient music that he referred to as lowercase. On his album Forms of Paper , Roden dealt with numerous forms of paper, recording the sounds before amplifying, stretching, looping, and otherwise affecting them until he generated a sort of ambient digital music. Whereas Roden claims he had been making lowercase music because the mid-Eighties, it wasn't till 2002 that lowercase gained some attention from the press following the release of the compilation album Lowercase-Sound , which launched the style's other artists to listeners.

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normanblogs · 4 years

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Miss United Continents 2016: When Jeslyn Santos of the Philippines reigned supreme

Was it the final Q&A delivered in Spanish that convinced the judges to crown a Filipina last 2016 as Miss United Continents or Miss Continentes Unidos? Or did Jeslyn Santos present herself most consistently all throughout the competition? I believe it was destiny and all of the above. To actually participate in a Latina-dominated pageant in Guayaquil, Ecuador can already pose a big challenge for…

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#Bb. Pilipinas #Daniel Fernando #Jeslyn Santos #John de la Vega #Miss United Continents 2016 #Miss World Peace 2015

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michaelsteinmedia-blog · 2 years

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How does someone get started in politics with David Earl Williams III

David Earl Williams III was born on January 8th, 1984, in Evanston, Illinois. He grew up, however, on Chicago’s North Side neighborhood of Rogers Park and then later Uptown, where he lived with his mother and two sisters. He also has an older brother. He is related to former Democratic Oklahoma State Senator, Eugene E. “Gene” Stipe. He is of mixed ancestry, that being – Black, Irish, Native American, French, German, British, Ashkenazi Jewish, and southeast Asian.

He was educated at Joseph Brennemann (1990-1995) and Louis B. Nettlehorst elementary (1996-1998), and Nicholas Senn High School (1999-2002). From 2000-2001, David was a member of Senn High School’s Academic Decathlon team. He helped his team advance onto the regional competition which was a first in the schools’ history. David would graduate from Senn High School in 2002 while on the Honor roll.

Immediately after graduating, David joined the U.S. Navy. He served as a Deck Seaman for the first two years during Operation Iraqi Freedom, then as a Logistics Specialist managing over $2 Billion dollars worth of aviation equipment and over 25 personnel for his remaining time. He was stationed in Yokosuka, Kanagawa, Japan from 2002-2006 onboard the U.S.S. Cowpens (CG-63). With his time in the U.S Armed Forces, he has traveled all over Asia and the Australian continent along with the Middle East. David was decorated eight times for his service until his Honorable Discharge in mid-2006.

Later in 2006, he began his studies abroad, eventually graduating from Lethbridge College located in Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada, after taking courses in General Studies and Criminal Justices. During the 2008 U.S. Presidential election, he would support & vote for, Barack Obama via absentee ballot.

In 2010, David returned back to the United States taking residence in his birthplace of Evanston, Illinois and shortly thereafter began his participation in the Chicago chapter of WeAreChange (2011-2014), a nationwide political activism group. During his time with WeAreChange, he protested Corporatism and took part in several anti-war demonstrations against the U.S. involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan.

In 2014, David ran for the U.S. House of Representatives, Illinois’ 9th District as a Republican. He lost the primary by 1,427 votes on March 18, 2014. In the summer of 2018, he announced his candidacy for Alderman in Chicago’s 48th Ward as an Independent. He would go on to receive 16.25% (2,415 votes) of the vote during the 2019 Chicago’s Municipal election.

Many who are close to David see him as a “Renaissance man”. In the past, David was a male model/promoter for Urban Offering clothing and Pink Avenue Models. He also starred as an extra in the music video, “Desert Spring Rose: Film Noir Vignette”, directed by Scott Feigen.

Besides his “day job” as a medical logistics specialist, David has volunteered in disaster relief efforts with Convoy of Hope, assisted in crisis intervention initiatives with National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), the Pro-Privacy activist organization known as Restore the Fourth, an animals rights activist with Chicago Alliance for Animals to ban horse carriages and replace them with pedicabs. He has also closely worked with the CPD Youth investigation division to help implement new ways on locating missing loved ones quickly and efficiently.

Outside of his political endeavors, he has volunteered (house-to-house canvassing and phone banking) for the following campaigns: Jesus “Chuy” Garcia’s 2015 Chicago Mayoral campaign, Lori Lightfoot’s 2019 Chicago Mayoral campaign, Andre Vasquez Aldermanic's campaign for the 40th ward, Illinois for Bernie 2020 Presidential campaign (Independent Vermont, Senator Bernie Sanders), Biden/Harris 2020, and Hoan Huynh for State Rep in Illinois 13th district campaign.

He is a former Freemason out of Evans lodge 524 (2013-2016), formerly provided veteran service outreach with the American Legion of Morton Grove Post 134 (2014-2017) & Benevolent and Protective Order of Elks lodge 1526 (2016-2018). He currently serves as the Co-Chairman for Unite America Chicago’s Chapter.

He is a nondenominational Christian, an author of the LitRPG book series titled VALOR TALE, and his hobbies/interests are: amateur voice-overs (particularly for Youtube user, Yeti112’s Resident Evil & Metal Gear Solid parodies series), working out, long-distance walking, swing dancing, video game music, Cats & Dogs, All Elite Wrestling (AEW), Vodka & M.U.G.E.N.

Check out this episode!

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finalank100 · 2 years

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Turkish tears as Togel SingaporeFrance bags Euro 2016

It always seemed a pipe dream, but it almost came to pass.

That Turkey, a relatively poor muslim satta king nation with humble infrastructure on the fringe of Europe, would pip two established football powers to the hosting of the continent's prestige event always looked a bit of a long shot.

And yet, when it came down to the vote in Geneva yesterday, UEFA's Executive Committee voted for France to host Euro 2016 by only one vote. France was a safe bet, the safest pair of hands of the three final competitors for the big prize. Italy, the other continental giant in contention, was eliminated after the first round of voting, perhaps still reeling from its rejection for 2012 in favour of Poland & Ukraine after Calciopoli and a season of ugly fan violence had exploded in UEFA's face.

On paper, the French bid had little donkey work to do, Togel Singaporewith the memory of France '98 still vivid and the Eurostars and TGVs still zapping through la campagne at dizzying speeds. Nevertheless, UEFA still found time to nitpick about the hotel provision and the lack of space for media and hospitality around their stadia.

Compared to its 1998 selection, the French Football Federation's choice for 2016 has no place for Brittany and the North-West with Nantes dropped in favour of Nancy and Strasbourg in the East, a region which missed out 12 years ago. On the Mediterranean coast, Nice replaces Montpellier, while in the far north, Lille's future 50,000-seat venue is included, adding another convenient venue for travelers from the United Kingdom.

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ironicbirb · 7 years

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A Basic Guide to Nathan Chen

With all the new fans joining our ever increasing band of Nathan Chen stans, as well as with the Olympics coming up in a few days, I figured I’d make a masterpost of all the essential things to know about him. Please note, I have only been watching Nathan skate since 2016 so I am by no means an expert but I have been a big fan during that time so I know quite a bit.

So whether you are someone who just wants to know more about Nathan for the Olympics, or you are a budding Nathan fan, this post is for you.

Click the read more to see the entire post.

First, a brief history of Nathan and his career. Nathan was born May 5th, 1999 in Salt Lake City, Utah. His parents are immigrants from China. He started skating in 2002 after the Winter Olympics were held in Salt Lake City. Along with figure skating, Nathan also trained in ballet and gymnastics and competed in those events up to the state level. In 2011, Nathan moved to California to train, and by late 2011 he switched to his current coach, Rafael Arutunian.

As for competition highlights, on the national level, Nathan is the 2010 US Novice Champion (youngest ever at that level) and the 2012 and 2014 US Junior Champion. His first senior US Nationals was in 2015, and he placed 8th due to a heel injury. In 2016, Nathan placed 3rd but he injured his hip during the exhibition skate and was out for the rest of the season. Sometimes the announcers still reference this during US Nationals. Nathan secured his first senior US champion title in 2017 and repeated that title in 2018.

On the international level, Nathan started in the Junior Grand Prix series in 2012 and he placed first in his first event but had to pull out of his second event due to injury. In 2013, he won gold at both of his qualifying events and went on to place 3rd in the Junior Grand Prix Final. That same season he placed 3rd at Junior Worlds. In 2015, Nathan went to Junior Worlds again but this time placed 4th. In the 2015 Junior Grand Prix series, he won gold at both of his qualifying events as well as the JGPF. However, he missed out on Junior Worlds that year because of his injury at US Nationals. In the 2016-2017 season, Nathan moved up to the senior level internationally. In the Grand Prix series, he placed 4th and 2nd respectively and qualified for the GPF. He won silver at the GPF and became the second youngest male skater to win a GPF medal after Evgeni Plushenko. That season, Nathan also won gold at Four Continents ahead of current Olympic champion Yuzuru Hanyu, but at Worlds he placed 6th due to nerves and boot issues.

As for this season, Nathan has won both of his GP Qualifying events as well as the Grand Prix Final and US Nationals. The Olympics is his next event and he will finish off the main season with Worlds in March.

Some of Nathan’s important accomplishments:

- He is the first skater to ever land 5 types of quads in competition The 4T, 4S, 4F, 4Lz, and 4Lo (4A has never been accomplished yet).

- He is a member of the 100 club (A fan term for those who have achieved a score over 100 in the short program…currently only at 7 members). Also he is one of only 6 skaters to ever score above a 200 in the free skate and one of only 5 skaters to earn a composite score above 300.

- He is the first skater to land 5 quad jumps in a free program as well as the first skater to land 7 quad jumps in a single competition

- He is also the youngest US man to win a medal at the GPF, the youngest US man since 1966 to win US Senior Nationals, and the youngest US man to win a gold medal at the GPF.

It is also important to note Nathan’s support team and those around him.

- Nathan’s coach is Rafael Arutunian. Rafael is from Georgia (the country not the state) during the time of the Soviet Union. Rafael now lives in California where he trains his skaters. Nathan sometimes skates to songs by Russian composers, and it is believed to have a lot to do with Rafael.

- Rafael can often be seen yelling/clapping/generally being excited on the edge of rinks during his skaters’ performances. He also sometimes gets more excited than his skaters do when they do well.

- Nathan also trains alongside fellow American skaters Adam Rippon (also on the US men’s Olympic team), Ashley Wagner, and Mariah Bell.

- Nathan is the youngest of 5 kids and his family always seems to be super supportive of him. One of his sisters works in Silicon Valley.

Other important things to know about Nathan and the figure skating fans:

- Nathan sometimes gets ripped on for being too technical of a skater, meaning too many jumps and not enough artistry. It is starting to happen less and less because his artistry has been improving as he matures but you will still see this happen on occasion.

- Nathan struggles with his triple axel more than any other jump. It is sometimes referred to as his Achilles heel.

- Nathan is a part of the sQUAD, which is a fan made group of Shoma Uno, Boyang Jin, and Nathan Chen. This group is made of younger skaters that can do insane jumps, hence the “QUAD” part of the name. This term is thrown around on occasion with figure skating fans.

- You may also hear of Nathan being called “King Quad.” This is a reference to a series of ads for United Airlines where Nathan was given a superhero persona called King Quad.

- Nathan has also done ads for Kelloggs, Bridgestone Tires, and Coca-Cola. He was featured on Kelloggs cornflake boxes for the 2018 Olympics. He also had an ad for the Winter Olympics during the Super Bowl.

- Nathan is a fan of the Utah Jazz basketball team and you will often find him tweeting about them.

Now here comes the fun part, the videos of old programs. There are a few programs that are essential to knowing Nathan. Most of them are going to be newer programs since they are more relevant but there are a few older ones.

First off this year’s programs. If you are just here for the Olympics then at least watch these. I picked the most recent performances (US Nationals 2018) because they have the official costumes and they are the closest to what you will see at the Olympics.

2017-2018 SP - “Nemesis” by Benjamin Clementine

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2017-2018 FS - Medley from Mao’s Last Dancer by Christopher Gordon and “The Rite of Spring” by Igor Stravinsky

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Other routines:

2016-2017 SP - “Le Corsaire” by Adolphe Adam

2016-2017 FS - “Polovtsian Dances” by Alexander Borodin

2016-2017 EX - “Stole the Show” by Kygo ft. Parson James

2017 EX - “Parachute” by Otto Knows

2018 EX - “No Good” by Kaleo *Current Exhibition Routine*

2014-2016 SP - Michael Jackson Medley

2015-2016 FS - “Symphony No. 3 avec Orgue” by Camille Saint-Saëns

The next ones are very old routines that are popular for showing baby Nathan.

2010 EX - “Peter and the Wolf” by Sergei Prokofiev

2009-2010 SP and FS - “Kung Fu Panda” by Hans Zimmer and “Peter and the Wolf” by Sergei Prokofiev (Added for @kingquadandco)

2007 or 2008 - “I Just Can’t Wait to be King” from The Lion King

To end it off, here are links to Nathan’s social media should you want to follow him:

Twitter and Instagram

If anyone has any more questions or wants to know more feel free to send me a message here or on my Twitter!

#i tried to make this as abridged as possible without skipping any important details #idk if this is useful to anyone but i had fun making it so thats all that matters #figure skating #nathan chen #fs #pyongchang 2018

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paintballdays · 6 years

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Pudding Head

MAY 15, 2016

I miss making homemade chocolate pudding.

I miss heating up the milk in a medium sauce pot.

Watching the small bubbles form as the near invisble clouds of steam slowly waft of the magical white lake.

I miss dumping in two packs of mix as soon as the foam begins to churn into large bubbles.

I miss how the little islands of powder would float about.

First lumped up in one large Pangea, then with the stir of a spoon break apart.

I’d stand mesmerized as the continents divide.

As Atlantis in a seething cauldron bubbles apart and slips down beneath the white darkening waves.

How the debris and sediment in large blackened browns swirl up from out of the depths.

I miss the cooling off.

How you would stand there motionless waiting for the skin to form.

Solidifying ripples across a smooth pliant land.

How in haste a tiny finger would dip down into the hot sauce to early.

Burning at first the finger, then the tongue and mouth as you still desired to savor the sweet tastes to come.

I miss how once covered and left alone in the fridge a thin layer of moisture would form over the top of a mud plan of chocolate.

Then once all things set, how fast the stirring spoon traveled.

Water and pudding uniting once more.

The fluffy creaminess.

I miss how chocolate mustaches highlighted smiles of childhood.

#story #truestory #pudding #childhood #memory #home #family #daydreams

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toughgirlchallenges · 3 years

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Jessica Hatcher-Moore - Journalist & author living on a hillside in North Wales, writing about improbable things; most recently, childbirth. AFTER BIRTH: What nobody tells you – How to Recover Body and Mind.

Jessica in her own words:

I am a British non-fiction writer living on a hillside in North Wales, where I write with candour (and, hopefully, a dash of humour) about improbable things; UFOs, the United Nations’ use of clowns to resolve conflict, and, most recently, the rigours of childbearing.

I grew up in Shropshire and, at first, dabbled with sports and adventure writing — I played international lacrosse, was one of the fastest unaffiliated runners in the 2011 London Marathon, and once cycled 5,000 miles across sub-Saharan Africa.

My career in journalism began as a reporter for the London Evening Standard’s gossip column, although I was not good at it, rarely knowing who anyone was. I moved to foreign affairs in East Africa. There, I notched up datelines (often in a flak jacket, this time) from across the continent, Bissau to Burundi, Congo to Madagascar, and met my future husband, a photojournalist, whilst covering the civil war in Somalia.

Within five years, I'd won a number of prestigious awards for my investigative features, including a Frontline Club Award, and was a regular contributor to the Guardian, TIME and Newsweek, for whom I wrote about topics including Islamic militancy, piracy, sexual violence and human trafficking.

In 2016, pining for the British countryside, I moved with my husband to Llangollen in North Wales, a decision made in part because it had the tightest contour lines we could find within an hour’s drive of a decent airport. I am now a mother to two small boys, and spent much of their formative years writing a book about motherhood – the postnatal period, to be precise – and submerging myself in the icy waters of the river Dee, which courses through the valley below our house.

Jessica’s first book - AFTER BIRTH: What nobody tells you – How to Recover Body and Mind and is available in all good book shops.

New episodes of the Tough Girl Podcast go live every Tuesday and Thursday at 7am UK time - Make sure you hit the subscribe button so you don’t miss out.

The Tough Girl Podcast is sponsorship and ad free thanks to the monthly financial support of patrons. To find out more about supporting your favourite podcast and becoming a patron please check out www.patreon.com/toughgirlpodcast.

Show notes

Who is Jessica and what she does

Being sporty at school and playing Lacrosse for Wales

Being good at running, but putting too much pressure on herself

Deciding to flee London and heading to Africa

Partying, getting drunk and trying to snog boys!

Finding regular work with the Evening Standard

Celebrity parties and finding out the gossip

Keeping costs down and running everywhere

Running a Marathon in Kenya on a nature reserve

Finding what she wanted to do

Making the decision to move to Nairobi and why it was easy

Feeling lost after university

Not knowing many people at first

Having savings and making editor connections before leaving

Being enthusiastic and very determined

Cycling 5,000+ miles across Africa for TUSK

The route through Africa

Missing female companionship during the cycle ride

Teaming up with Centre Point

Being under pressure to arrive at places

Needing more downtime

Spending 4 months on the road - cycled for 5/7 days visit a place and then carry on

Meeting her husband on a trip to Somali

How her priorities changed

Making the change to having babies and getting married

Continuing to write and share stories

Having her first baby and not being prepared

Dealing with the loss of physical activity

Using running to stay sane

Going for a swim in the River Dee in November

Starting to feel more like herself again

Balancing work and babies

Focusing on your own physical and mental recovery

Taking 2 years to feel strong again

Giving women better information

Using words like vagina

Not prioritising herself enough

Follow Kari Bo for Pelvic Floor Exercises

Learning how to retrain the bladder

All the stuff you shouldn’t do after having a baby

Giving women the information they need to make informed choices

Antony Lo

Supporting women with prolapse

Cold water therapy and dipping in the River Dee

Final words of advice for women who have just given birth

Social Media

Website: www.jessicahatcher.com

Instagram: @jessicajanehatcher

Facebook: @jessicajanehatcher

Twitter: @jessiehatcher

Book: AFTER BIRTH: What nobody tells you – How to Recover Body and Mind is available in all good book shops.

About: While there is a wealth of advice for new mums on caring for their babies the same is not true for postpartum health. Fulfilling this vital need, After Birth is the ultimate postnatal primer for women facing changes to their bodies after having a baby.

Addressing issues great and small - from hair loss and stretch marks, to bladder and bowel leaks, painful sex, diastasis recti and mental health - researcher and writer Jessica Hatcher-Moore brings together straight-talking advice on preparation for childbirth, healing, and recovery in the weeks, months and even years that follow. She also offers insights for partners, whose role is often overlooked at this critical time.

Blending knowledge from the full spectrum of modern and traditional therapies with honest experiences from mothers, here is balanced advice with no agenda. Taking a broad look at what we can do for ourselves at home, and also when to seek expert help, After Birth will reassure, inform and empower women to reclaim their post-birth bodies.

Check out this episode!

#podcast #women #sports #health #motivation #challenges #change #adventure #active #wellness #explore #grow #support #encourage #running #swimming #triathlon #exercise #weights

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