#Miss Manila 2017 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

n0resistance · 8 months ago

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Winter

I always hated winter. My mom hated winter. We get sick in the winter and are anemic so we’re always cold, and get the flu easily. And for when she was a live and what I do for a living, the amount of money you make drops in the winter. When I turned 9 my mother would go to the Philippines every winter. She was in real estate so her business was slow and she wanted to get out of the cold. She said her cough would go away as long as it was warm.

When I was little I used to always say that the only good thing about winter was skiing, and then when I turned 14 I would say the only good thing was snowboarding. There's ice skating, hot chocolate, Christmas, and snow tubing. We had a vacation home in the Poconos and utilized it for skiing trips.

Finally in 2017 I escaped winter moving to La in the thick of winter in January. Then after 3 winters in a row living in LA, I missed the seasons. I actually missed the cold, maybe a day with it. I was so tired of the day being beautiful everyday. Who would've thought, but the desert got to be too much. When I was living in LA I would hide out in "bourgeois pig", the darkest coffee shop in Hollywood. Just to escape all that light.

When I moved back to New York, I thought Oh brother winter is coming, and my first winter in New York was the Pandemic. So it was brutal. We atleast made money with the covid-relief while hospitality workers weren't able to work.

I remember in February 2020, right before the shutdown, I went to LA with sorority sisters and my ex, and I got to see everyone I had left in 2019, so my trip was exhausting. However, the amount we were working, the small apartments in Brooklyn, and just being super stuck in the city in the freezing cold.

I really wanted to leave and we organized a trip. Then when we got back, bam, the pandemic hit.

Everything in life really fell apart. It took a lot of energy to put it back together. The following winter February 2021 I went to Dominican Republic with friends. Then the following winter December 2021 I went to DR for a wedding, and it was a week long, but when I got back the winter deadness, depression, lack of money and lack of work really hit, stuck in my small apartment feeling the winter blues would happen and I just had to go to therapy.

I didn't have the money to leave the country or to flee to the west coast, but I had insurance that covered this so I talked through my winter blues. Which were actually decades and decades of blues. So I talked to her for a good 6 months and was like you know what, I never want to feel the winter blues like I did last time I'm going to leave for the whole winter.

Now, it wasn't the whole winter because that is really really difficult. I planned all summer to take this amazing trip. To LA North Hollywood --> Manila Philippines-->Siargao P.I-->Sydney Au -->layover in Hawaii--> LA ktown --> Palm Springs--> San Diego --> Home. December 24- February 15. 7 weeks. I really started buying tickets in June. It was enough time to plan a perfect trip and transition out of my old life into the new.

The best part is I stayed with people everywhere I went because I have family and close friends in these parts of the world. My acting friend who has a family, my brother, and entire mom's side of the family, plus doing adventures like surfing and swimming in Siargao, seeing a friend I knew since kindergarten in his new home in Sydney and getting to go to his amazing birthday party, and going to beaches like Manly Beach or Bondi Beach, (where when you go under water you feel like a marine biologist) and in ktown I stayed with my old roommate, where we felt like roommates again, and in Palm Springs I actually did a Bachelorette party for my friend, and saw cousins & An Aunt I haven't seen in forever which was really nice, and finally seeing my close friend who now lives in San Diego and my best friend who also lives there. So I was busy, not working!, and connecting, importantly enough I was connecting to myself and I got rid of those winter blues.

It wasn't easy, It was a reset, had to find a new job and that was a blessing, I was away from my boyfriend whom I missed terribly and he had a hard time in the winter, and I needed to travel to self-soothe because I didn't like where I was stuck in life. I wasn't happy with work, or my habits, or myself. Travel allowed me to just stop and just live, and the weeks go fast, but then you realize in 1 work day all the cool things you can accomplish.

Anyway this post isn't about my amazing winter in the Philippines. It's about the past winter that is just ending right now.

I changed my high stress, high paid, dead winter job and got a couple chill jobs. I finally moved out of Bushwick, a highly congested area with small apartments that are falling apart, even if they look modern, for our own apartment that's spacious in Queens. Dom and I think, how did take us so long to move to Queens. This winter I quit drinking. Not the whole winter but I did it for 2 straight months and it did feel amazing. Your sugar intake does increase. I didn't like who I was and I also could not afford drinking in NYC anymore. I could not.

So I filled my time with yoga, kickboxing, aerial yoga, good dinners, shows, and learning languages. I would discover museums The Met, Picking up dog sits, like we did on Christmas. I love checking out galleries too. Another thing is this winter, this year, my boyfriend works a lot, and when he finally has days off and we finally get to spend time together; it’s quality time together. No stress, no running around, not a million people. just us and just us only.

When you're in your 30's and you have friends that are married who are starting their families. When you’re at a stage where you finally don’t have roommates, no kids, you don't even have a dog, so you get plants and a fish. Priorities shift. I like being home, I wana see my family or my boyfriend, you stop prioritizing your friends, and start prioritizing jobs you enjoy and focus on healthy hobbies like yoga. I wana read. I realized the beauty of New York in the winter is this. No lines, not many people, you can take a class on anything, try Groupon, you discover so many shows, eating out you can get in and out easy. This time I didn’t leave for 7 weeks just left for 1 week. San Diego, LA, and Phoenix. To be honest it was a great trip because I realized LA isn’t the vibe for me anymore. I really enjoyed Phoenix, Arizona. I want intimate nights at home, hiking, nature, good food, and good vibes. My 20’s are really over. My head and my heart tell me that.

I’m glad to know when you’re busy with the right stuff and in the right situation. Winter isn’t that bad. I also figured out my chronic sickness was because I hated my job. Life is way too short for that. The drinking was also from high stress. It really will come down to taking care of yourself and your needs. Then you can survive winter. You can probably survive anything.

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purplesurveys · 1 year ago

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1753

Name the last 6 people you texted:

1. Jo 2. CJ 3. Lui 4. JM 5. Angela 6. Nina

How did you meet #3? It was in 2017 and I was a then-applicant to what would be my org throughout college. Lui had been a member of the org's executive board at the time so they had been quite active in engaging with us newbies and introducing us to what the org does.

What’s #6’s middle name? I'm not sharing anything beyond her nickname.

Who have you known the longest out of your 6? Well that would be #6, since she's my sister and she's been in my life since I was 2 – a total of 23 years.

Who have you known the least out of your 6? #2, CJ. It was my first time to meet him today, actually – he's apparently one of my org's present VPs so when we had our Zoom call earlier to discuss reorganization efforts with the rest of the alumni, he had been the main spokesperson/moderator.

How do you know #5? We met in Grade 1. We were seatmates and I accidentally struck her palm with a pencil, but even after that she still decided to be friends with me haha so 18 years later here we are.

Where does #1 live? Some city within Metro Manila that I'm not disclosing.

Is #1 your best friend? I wouldn't say so, but we're pretty close. Among my entire college friend group, she's the one I bond with the most frequently almost entirely thanks to our shared love for BTS.

Who on your 6 doesn’t have a job? CJ is an undergrad so I'm guessing he doesn't; Jo as far as I know is still job-hunting; JM is in law school so apart from a mandatory law firm internship I don't think he's currently employed either.

Does #5 have their drivers license? She doesn't but she has I think what's called a learner's permit? Like it doesn't make her fully-fledged-ly(?) qualified to drive – she can, but with a whole bunch of restrictions.

Would you ever live with #2? Probably not; I don't know him all that well.

Why did you text #4? Well all the org group chats simultaneously revived due to the recent involvement of the org alumni to support the current members as they bring it back to life, so I've been in close touch with everyone.

Do you miss #3? I mean sure I miss seeing them in casual settings, but I'm not very close/affectionate with Lui to begin with. I'd love to see them over drinks and with a bigger group.

Is #6 a stoner or alchie? Nope.

Have you ever danced with #2? I've never done anything with #2 hahaha. I've only spoken to him over Zoom!

Have you ever done anything sexual with any of them? Lui tried something with me without my consent, once. Not sexual, but I think they wanted it to head there at the time. I was also with someone back then so that gave me MAJOR ICK, but idk I was able to move past it so whatever.

What would your life be like without #1? I don't think it would be majorly different tbh, but she is special to me regardless. All my friends are.

Is #2 your best friend? Nope.

What do you love about #3? They're extremely passionate about their interests, and it's been great to see them dabble in a bunch of side projects like hosting podcasts and being interviewed on news programs.

What is #5’s weakness? Tbh Angela has her shit beautifully together at this point in our lives so it'd be very hard for me to pinpoint a weakness. When we were younger she used to be an extreme perfectionist – like she'd cry if she'd get an exam score below her target – but she has that mostly resolved now as she has no problem going with the flow + simply starting over when things don't go her way.

What do you dislike about #3? Always seems to be desperate for a partner every single time we have a conversation. I don't need to hear how heartbroken or lonely you are all the time, lol.

What kind of car does #4 drive? I mean the last time we hung out he would regularly alternate between a Nissan Terra and Audi (or was it BMW? not sure lol), but idk if that still holds up today.

What would you do if #3 & #6 were dating? I'd probably raise hell and tell my sister to please not, lol. I love Lui, but not as a partner for her.

Does #2 have a boyfriend/girlfriend? I have no idea.

Have you ever seen #1 cry? No, not cry. But I've seen her in great distress. Just not a good time altogether for her and I'm very proud of her for getting past that period. To this day I feel quietly protective of her because of what she went through.

Have you ever kept a secret from #5? Sure, but she always finds things out anyway.

Does #2 have any special talents? No idea. I barely know the guy.

In one word, describe #6. Independent.

Has anyone in your top 6 hurt you? Who? Yeah I guess Lui did when they did that creepy thing to me a few years back.

Have you ever fought with #6? We're siblings, so yes.

Is #1 a musician? No.

How old is #4? 26.

Would you ever kiss #5 (if you haven’t already)? Nah.

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mommy-travel-list · 1 year ago

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San Juan de Dios Hospital, November 2017 -- The flourescent light in the clinic's waiting area lit dim, augemented by the midday rays that pierced through the window shutters. San Juan de Dios was a hospital catering to the poor, and we went there in an effort to access the lower fees that our new onco charged in his SJD clinic. The brain scan results we held showed that her breast cancer metastesized to her brain, with there were 3 tumors growing. We waited for our turn with Dr Cornelio to interpret the findings and tell us our next steps. Dr Cornelio is the onco of choice for Stage 4 patients, those at the end of the line, and those who were open to what could be perceived as aggressive treatment. We were at the end of the line. We needed an aggressive treatment. We should have gone to him earlier.

His fees were expensive. I remember shouldering a couple of sessions of chemotherapy, and for someone who earns Php 75k a month gross, the fees were substantial. But money is just numbers at the face of the opportunity to help my mother. This guy gave us the highest chance of saving my mother.

I remember clutching the laminated card that indicated our number in the line. It was yellow, with the laminated plastic peeling at the sides, from the fiddling of patients and patients' daughters while seated on the cracked leather couch. I've cried many nights previous. My eyes hurt. My heart hurts. But I needed to put a brave face for Mommy to help keep her strong.

Mommy handed me a white sheet of paper torn from her Figaro planner.

"Places I wish to go

Help me achieve one/some/all

Faith and Gabriel"

In true Mommy OC style, she listed the great-to-achieve places in the front page. Important places like Canada to see her siblings, food trips for my foodie Mommy, and low hanging fruit like a health retreat we already booked. The back of the page listed the would-be-great-to-visit places that she also wanted to see. It was written in her handwritting that's all too familiar to me. We discussed what could be doable in the immediate time frame, and made a mental note to discuss our travel options with Dr Cornelio. She kept the paper in one of the pouches in her bag.

The brain cancer was a journey. She got better, and then she didn't. We did our health retreat in San Benito in the same year that she showed me the travel bucket list, and unknowingly ticked off the Taiwan trip during a trip with her siblings in the New Year 2019. I forgot about the paper. My mom died on 16 September 2019, then I flew to Napa Valley to cry. I remember walking past grape fields and crying and talking to me mom in my head. In the course of my conversations with her, I remembered the paper. I'll look for it in Manila, I'm sure it's just in a pouch..

My mother kept her medical files and random paper on the bench next to my bed in my room. For easy access to her records, when needed. She died, and files were never needed as she intended, but the pile of stuff just stayed beside my bed through the years. I couldn't bring to move my mother out of my room.

Over the years, I would look into my mother's pouches around the house, looking for the travel bucket list. To no avail. One day on April 2023, I decided to tackle the pile. To reduce it, maybe establish some sense of order, but mostly to look for that random piece of paper. 3 hours of wading into records by year and throwing hospital receipts, I found the paper in a well-hidden pouch. A wave of memories swept through me. I missed my mom so much. Four years after her death and the pain still feels like it carved into my hearth and in its place a black hole of sadness. It's a pain I wouldn't wish even on my worst enemy.

I took a photo of the pages and sent it to my cousins in our group chat. "I guess I have my work cut out for me," I typed. We made soft plans of doing some trips together, with Ate Charmi from Geneva to maybe accompany me in EU destinations and maybe doing the Canada trip with Ate Chris and her family.

Mommy, I want you to know we're doing these trips together.

#travel #mother #grief

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reeia · 7 years ago

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10 thoughts about Japan (Osaka to be Specific)

WARNING: there are too much amazement here!

Garden Koko-en, Himeji

They don't really know how to express their care to the foreigners verbally but with their facilities, you’ll see, they care BIG TIME! First of all they made the AC centralized! Haha.. It was 8degrees when the plane landed at Kansai International airport. Woah! I only got two jackets, I wasn’t expecting Japan to be that cold, I’ve checked the weather beforehand but still I’ve never experienced that before...It was summer in the Philippines (March 25, 2017) yet it’s so cold in Japan. I guess it is called tail of winter and early spring though. I was really not prepared; in fact I have brought a flip flops & citronella lotion. Hahah (summery feels!) Apparently I wasn’t able to use those. It’s too cold for those mosquitos to fly around Japan, they can’t because they have thick jackets as well, but the truth is they all died!

Still about the facilities, let’s talk about the comfort rooms. Toilet bowls have buttons for washing uranus, haha..really designed for pooping and as I have seen, mall toilets seemed like wifi connected cause there’s a wifi symbol on screen. So high tech! I couldn’t miss the experience so I tried it! hahah 😊 😊 😊 The comfort room will definitely give you comfort!

at Piole Mall Himeji

3. Wide sidewalks, it’s obvious that they prioritized safety for the pedestrians and drivers inside their vehicles are courteous, when green lights turn they wait few seconds before they go. (Now imagine that situation in Manila, some drivers are just so impatient and rude). Okay too much of comparing, bad vibes are starting to cover up my feel good mood right now for this Japan review. Hihi. I’d loved to mention I did not experience traffic congestion at all on my stay there.

4. Vendo capital. You’ll find vendo machines on almost every side of roads and railroads. You will never get thirsty; you’ll find variety of drinks from water to juices to sodas, (vendo kaya ng mga uhaw sa pag ibig meron?) LOL. Fare for train, vendo. Fare for buses, vendo. Open parking spaces, vendo, they don’t hire guards.

5. Safe place. Even if I had put my wallet in the front pocket of my bag pack, there’s no thief. My friend’s bag’s zip tends to open most of the time, I just told myself "great that we are not in Manila.". Houses have small gates or none, Japanese’ knows they’re safe.

Hyogo, Kobe

6. Super clean environment and disciplined locals. There are trash bins for bottles, papers, some for left overs and for other garbages. No one’s littering. After eating at a restaurant people will dispose or bring back to the counter what they’ve used (utensils), so a crew will just have to wipe the tables. :) At the streets I saw some dogs being walked, one pooped, but the owner has a plastic bag on his hand and grabbed it. 😅

Dotonburi

7. Cool architecture. House exteriors are so cute, simple and ideal. Buildings have PVC exterior walls, I’ve knocked on to curiosity, interiors are plywood, I think those are assembled house, only stairs and roof deck were made of concrete, well I believe columns and beams as well. Even comfort rooms, toilet, wall, tub and floor were built altogether, so they would just install them quick. I loved the accordion door at the apartment I stayed in it made me want to take that home. 😂 Also I had time to go to a children playground, I’ve notice even the high storey houses have PVC exteriors but looks like concrete. Cool!

8. Fashion city. I think I belong there, it seemed like every street is a runway, they don’t care about what people may say, whatever outfits they wear they never run out of fashion sense, skirt over leggings, long skirts, loose jeans, boots, knee high socks, hair dresses. From babies to oldies, they soooo cute!!!! ♥

9. FOODS! I loveeet!!! Sushi, grilled eel, oyster, takoyaki, chocolates, ice creams, all that I’ve eaten there were sooo oishi! Worth the expensiveness! 😂 😂

Matcha X Sakura

10. The spending. Japan has a high cost of living, as shown on their bodies because they choose to walk and bike. I spent more on foods and transportations, well those were the things I’ve only got to spend onto. My train fare ranges from 160-970yen (x .44 for php), taxi costs 1000yen and above.

11. Oops I am making it 11 because this is the one thing I’ve really liked about experiencing the country. You'll hear "arigato" everywhere; I didn’t even heard one uttered "bakero". Japanese' are always grateful that’s why they are successful. Beautiful people. ❤️ Try to walk around the streets of Philippines, what are you hearing?

two of my goals there, to have a picture with a pure Japanese and to see a cherry blossom. Too bad I wasn't able to prepare a good camera. I have borrowed my friend's phone but she sent the pics through facebook and quality diminished. :(

BUT I am probably coming back! ❤️ 🌸

#japan #osaka #travel

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soyasojourns · 2 years ago

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「映画祭」 - My Eigasai experience through the years

It has been a while since I last saw a film that I truly enjoyed. I recently watched a selection from an ongoing online screening in Eigasai, the Japanese Film Festival. I am amazed at how Eigasai has transformed since I first learned about it as a university freshman years ago. It has expanded in terms of movie selection, now including independent films in recent years, to complement the standard selection of contemporary films. There is an increase in the number of films screened and the number of screenings - apart from Metro Manila screenings, select provincial screenings are now made possible. Most importantly, the platform for access - an online platform for streaming was created to watch the films for a limited time. As I have moved to a place where I currently have no access to provincial screenings, I have greatly benefited from this online platform. But truth be told, I'd still prefer a theater screening over an online one.

I dug up my memory to recall the films I watched through the years, from 2007 until the present year, 2023.

I've completed a total of 17 films, including one film from the Haruki Murakami Festival in 2018, originally screened in an earlier line-up. I noticed that I also missed the film festival in several years (2009, 2016, 2019, and 2021-2022).

Most of the time, I watched the films alone but there were several occasions when there were opportunities to ask friends to come with me.

Eigasai usually coincided with the Philippines-Japan Friendship Month in July, with screenings running from July to August. In 2007, my roommate's high school friends from UP Rural High introduced me to Eigasai. Since they knew I was interested in Japan and Japanese culture, they invited me to watch Shimotsuma Monogatari (Kamikaze Girls) with them. The movie screened at 7PM and was estimated to end near 9PM, the time of our dormitory's curfew. As soon as the credits rolled at the end, we rushed out of Cine Adarna and ran back towards our dormitory. We were huffing, puffing, and sweating when we arrived at our dorm's lobby, glad we made it on time. Shimotsuma Monogatari is a brilliant and amusing coming-of-age movie. I was 17 at that time, the same age as the protagonists in the film. It just felt right to watch it at that time.

I first watched an Eigasai film at an Edsa Shangrila screening in 2010. The festival opening and first screenings were usually scheduled in this venue before going to other theaters. I had a Japan Studies class then wherein we were tasked to write a reaction paper about any film from the Eigasai line-up. What fit my schedule at that time was the screening of Houtai Club (Bandage Club). To this date, I think this is my favorite movie about friendship, connection, vulnerability, strength, and courage - perfect for the dynamic emotional shifts and changes experienced by adolescents.

Two very memorable films for me wherein I remember having shed a lot of tears were Okuribito (Departures) and Itai: Asu e no Tōkakan (Reunion) which I watched in 2011 and 2014 respectively. After watching these movies, I am reminded of the strength of the human spirit, resiliency, and to remain dignified in times of great distress, especially when things are beyond our control.

In 2017, I visited my second hometown, Iloilo City. Coincidentally, during my visit, there was an Eigasai screening in Cinematheque Iloilo. What matched my schedule was If Cats Disappeared from the World which was dubbed in Tagalog. Watching the film without my eyes chasing English subtitles at the bottom of the screen felt good.

The most recent film I watched was Hottamaru Byori (Hottamaru Days), a Japanese independent film, screened under JFF+ or simply Japan Film Festival Plus - the film programming for independent films, hosted by several small theaters across Japan.

Hottamaru Days was a very refreshing film. I love the attention to detail – the shots, use of light, sound, and dance. I like how the dancing nymphs emulate the mundaneness of everyday life in their own fun and playful way. The film was intriguing and at the same time, interesting. I love the film's combination of wander, wonder, playfulness, and otherworldliness. I look forward to more works of Director Nao Yoshigai (and other female Directors) as well as more uniquely visually visceral films in future line-ups.

Watch Hottamaru Days here for free. You just need to register for an account and you can watch the currently screening six (6) independent films until March 2023. After which a new set of films will be programmed.

In-theater screenings have started and the schedule and line-up can be viewed here.

#eigasai #japanese film festival #jff

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perohindidin · 2 years ago

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So, it's been six years, and a lot has changed from when I was last here. This'll be a great way to document and remind myself what's been going on since then.

Overall, I'm in a much better place. I mean, I'm still anxious, but not as depressed, nor as pessimistic. I no longer work in social services, am fully in Human Resources, and *a lot of specialized jargon* and undertake projects in sustainability and social inclusion and, I have had the opportunity to work for impactful, and award winning projects in the organizations I've been with since I ventured out of social services in 2017.

I still love architecture and specifically places of worship and civic structures. I also still love learning about different Philippine cultures and specifically have an interest in local handwoven textiles. I still do guided tours of the old city of Manila, although not as often as I used to. There's a lot of great people already doing those anyway. I'm just glad my city is getting a resurgence.

My work, and my interest in local cultures has also led me to travel to almost all provinces of the Philippines. I'm missing few, and plan to complete my pin map of provinces in the next few years.

I caught a life threatening infection in my scrotum that nearly killed me and had me undergo 5 surgeries in the span of a month. I'm better now, but that experience really put a lot of things into perspective and made me realize that security in healthcare and in social support systems is important when you have something to live for. Also that Filipinos deserve better from their government and social systems.

After years of being non committal, prioritizing work over my dating life, and making the excuse that I couldn't properly be in a relationship because I was busy, also using non gendered pronouns to refer my romantic relationships, because I didn't want to explain why the pronouns switched so often; I serendipitously met, and started dating a guy who I felt such an immense connection to that I wanted to share him with the world. That led me to come out as pansexual to my friends and family in 2020. Anyway, I'm in a 2 going on 3 year long term committed relationship with an awesome agriculturist/ horticulturist/ makeup artist/ drag queen.

We've mostly been living in our house in Manila; and while Maki, my pug, died in 2020, we've since been joined by a Husky, named Nori, and another pug, named Hopia. They're close.

Although still living with relatives in Manila, I am a homeowner, although the house is 3 provinces away from the capital, where I currently live. They were planning to transfer government offices there, and I decided to invest in the area.

I'm pretty happy, and I hope this lasts. As to why I'm back here, it's because I left another social media platform for political and social reasons, and I needed a place to still rant and vent. This was my original space, so why not back here, right?

Anyway, I'm back to but, no.

-perohindidin

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not-so-rosyyy · 2 years ago

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I’m not as obsessed with them now as I was before and I already knew this was coming (was never really hopeful about the military exception) but…this still kinda hurt, ngl 😭😭😭

Lmao don’t mind me this is just me being dramatic asf. They said they’ll be back anyway as a group by 2025, but man 2+ years is a long time not to hear from them. Also I’m mostly salty at the fact that I haven’t experienced an irl concert because the last time they came to Manila for a con was May 2017 and I only became a legit fan later that year. I missed them by mere MONTHS. After that, they blew up and never came back to my poor country again.

I’ll be waiting for their return, though! Their music and content helped me a lot during some of the most difficult times of my adult life (literally thru work struggles, friendship and relationship woes, even my grandma’s death). You can say the parasocial connection I had with them was rather deep. And I’m forever thankful for that because instead of destroying me, it helped me grow.

Anyway, sending love and purple hearts to all my fellow armys! Brb because I’m gonna be crying to Young Forever, Spring Day and 2! 3! now 🥺💜

#sorry for being dramatic #it’s the monday blues #and also BTS really made a huge impact on me so #they’ll be back but i still feel a way #kpop post #bts

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shotwithsoju-blog · 7 years ago

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RELIVE the First DragCon in New York City with Soju! RuPaul's DragCon NYC 2017 Complete Recap Video has arrived!✨🗽

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stormblessed95 · 3 years ago

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So i want to talk about the threatening feeling of the haters and imo the time this at the minimal was 2015 like Jikookers were less that time but still people could see things but one cant get to a conclusion like today JM have said that he dont depend on anyone for emotional support and i think to an extent was right back then .JK mainly the maknae baby was consoled and had the privilage to break down like Jm said he used to console him when he missed his parents back then and he have broke down infront of JM . Ok this was the tradition atleast. In 2015 when they won the first stage win for INU JM cried and we see Jk was recording but Jm shoved away him when he asked him are you okay? like he wanted to be alone. Till now its Hyung being the authoritive person in their relationship with Jm being always the one having that unspoken decision maker but what changed can be observed from the three vlives with Jin took place in 2016 first when Jin and Jm reacted to celebrity bromance episodes of Jk and and a Senior idol . JM was so invested in making it clear Jk treats him differently then we see Jk buying coffee for both of them then Jm said he never does like this with me ,which indicates still Jk plays a younger person role in the relationship and remains subtle .Then Jimin says he has no feelings for me very innocently to which Jin says Jm I have feelings for you .The second is the Vlive after Osaka Vlive when JM says maknae always comes when i call him for the vlive and he texts him and after some min he comes . But in the third Hey stob it vlive when Jk comes and Jm asks him did you ever come when i called you . anyways he enters by blackmailing both Jm and Jin and enter the room then we see Jm a bit sulking a said Jungkookie you were not like this you used to come when i called you to this he replied I learnt it from you and we see JK threatening JM with some picture and he backs off immediately and sits down quietly i mean he made Jm shut up. This is the shift that positively made their relationship more beautiful. this vlive took place in december and prior to that the infamous Manila fight took place and we in one of the dance Jm does something cute to lower down Jk's anger but Jk to his face ignores it then he smirks a bit like yeah baby i won kinda look .I am mentioning all this because from the monotonous relationship they have upgraded and Jk too got the authority to play his part and he started dropping Honorifics completely and now its not only Hyung will do it anymore and this have given more freedom for Jm to Break down infront of Jk its ok when things go hard . Now this is what made them so strong and Jk also started giving support for Jm. Then we see in 2017 Jk paid for a trip all by himself then he also made excuses and said to Jm lets go shopping lol and filmed it and started completing his every wish to the point till today his wishes are all completed and Jk was asking for some next set of wishes in this years Festa . also we see Jk piggybacking JM in BV 1 where he said he was not so strong to today anytime anywhere if he's thrown some 57 kgs (Jm) upon him in any direction he can catch it without any problem .THE EVOLUTION IS THAT MATTERS AND EVERYONE SEES IT AND KNOWS IT SOME SUPPORT THEY ARE JIKOOKERS AND SOME KEEP QUIET THEY ARE LOYAL ARMYS AND SOME HATE WHO ALSO SEE THIS .THE BEST WAY IS TO KEEP ON SUPPORTING THEM .

Opinions. I agree with the fact that we 100% saw a power shift/struggle in 2016. Dynamics changed severely during that year and it wasn't a super smooth transition at times, at least from what we saw on camera. 2016 was a major time period change for them. Personally I think its when they made their relationship official, if they are in one. And that was probably a lot to navigate for 2 world famous boys in a homophobic country, especially when one wasn't used to being taken care or a more equal relationship and was stuck in having a more hyung/dongsaeng dynamic.

Whatever it was they got to where they are now which is full of happy and content vibes between the 2 of them

#jikook through the years #jikook #kookmin #anon #ask #anon opinions #power dynamics

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kyber-crystal · 4 years ago

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Maybe It’s Meant To Be

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: ~3.7k

Summary: Sometimes, love finds people in unexpected ways. In this case, fate has extra special plans for America’s golden boy and one of SHIELD’s best agents in history. And you know there’s no running away from fate once she’s set out your futures for you.

Warnings: mentions of violence and blood, angst, and once again, soft steve :)

A/N: I haven’t attempted a soulmate AU in over a year. this is one of my fav works but it’s really poorly written rip. The age gap between you and Steve is ~3 years. 2017 AU where they made up after the Accords :) Steve’s back with his WS look bc that suit was hot af

Tags: @pies-writes-and-more this is for you! THANK YOU FOR ALWAYS BEING SO ACTIVE ON MY BLOG AND FOR YOUR SWEET AND SUPER ENCOURAGING WORDS. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. AND @marvelsswansong BECAUSE YOU'RE MY IDOL AND I LOOK UP TO YOU YOU'RE AMAZING

Soulmates.

You'd heard plenty about them growing up. Seeing your parents' perfect relationship blossom over the years piqued your interest, and for the longest time, your only wish was to find someone who could love you with their whole heart and soul and mind, like the way your Mom and Dad loved each other.

Unfortunately, as all stories must come to an end, love stories had to find their ending. And not all of them ended on a high note.

Their jobs should've kept them apart from the beginning. Your mother was head surgeon at one of the best hospitals in Brooklyn, and your father was head of SHIELD's navy division. Constantly out and about, they were rarely granted any time to rest. Yet they still found a way to make things work; and it all started because of a run-in at a café around the corner.

Then when you were fifteen, you got word that your father had been deployed overseas again, but this time, he wasn't coming back.

You had to stand there and watch your mother slowly fall apart, breaking down a little more each day until she fell gravely ill. A mere week after her diagnosis of cardiomyopathy, she passed away in her sleep.

A person's soulmark didn't appear at a specific time. It could show up at any point in their lives, when the Gods believed the time was right for them. When those Gods felt the time was right for you to find out who it was, you'd feel a slight tingle where the mark was etched into your skin.

Some people didn't receive the soulmark at all. Along with this came a sense of freedom to fall in love with whoever they pleased, but often times it would end in a loveless relationship. But they were additionally granted the ability of being able to carry on by themselves.

If your soulmate got injured in any way, you would feel the same pain that they endured. And if they died, you would carry a weight around with you for the rest of your life that slowly progressed into a disease. So ultimately, those left in the world without their soulmate would also die in the end, further proving the claim of humans being unable to live without love.

One by one, you watched your friends find their match. They would excited come up to you, goofy grins on their faces as they showed you their marks. You were happy for them in the beginning, of course. But as years went by, and you passed adulthood with still no sign of your designated soulmark, you slowly began losing hope. There was no point in looking forward to the future when you watched one fall apart before your very eyes.

Maybe it was because of your job. None of the Avengers had received their soulmarks either, asides from Tony and Pepper. But they were an exception. Everyone could see it coming from the day they first met, judging by the way they lovingly gazed at each other from across the room. It was a match made in heaven.

You believed that maybe, just maybe, you were destined to be alone. So when you woke up one morning with the burn mark on your wrist, you were taken completely by surprise.

"Hey, Tony? Bruce?" you asked, walking into the lab with a frown. "I need to ask you guys a quick question."

"Ask away, Killer," Tony nodded, using the nickname he'd given you years ago when you first joined the initiative. "What's on your mind?"

"So, um..." you fiddled with the sleeve of your sweatshirt for a moment, before pulling it up to reveal the mark, "this happened."

"That's a soulmark," he stated.

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock," you rolled your eyes. "But why would it appear now? I don't see any sign of me meeting them anytime soon."

"When did it appear?"

"I don't know. I woke up this morning and saw it."

"Let me take a look at that," Bruce carefully took ahold of your wrist, squinting as he adjusted his glasses to peer at the mark, "huh. So it appeared last night...have you felt any side-effects?"

"Not that I know of yet, no..."

"If you start feeling any severe symptoms, I can prescribe you some medication to deal with the pain, though I doubt that's going to happen. In the meantime, we need to figure out who this could be."

"Imagine if it was someone who already died, and I'm slowly dying right now," you joked.

"No, if that were to be true, you'd be lying in a hospital bed right now."

"Does the symbol have any specific meaning?"

"That I'm not so sure about," Tony shrugged.

Bruce was silent as he began typing away for a bit, before turning the screen over to you.

"I've checked out over a dozen different sites about this, and..."

"And what?"

"Well...once both people discover their mark, they have a week to find each other before both of them disappear off the face of the earth, forever."

"Sounds like a damn time bomb to me," you muttered. "What the hell? I thought that the point of this whole thing was the gods trying to push us with someone else! Not the other way around!"

"I don't know, Y/N," Bruce sighed. "Feel free to do your own research, but everything I've read up on so far says the same thing."

"So basically, what you're telling me is I'm gonna die if I don't find out who the hell has this same mark as I do," you repeated.

"Unfortunately, yes."

"Well, I'll have to worry about that later. Got a briefing with Cap, Bucky, and Wilson in five. Fury's gonna kill me if I'm late again," you breathed out as you tugged your hoodie's sleeve back down. "See ya."

"Agent Y/N," Nick Fury gave you a curt nod as you burst into the meeting room, breathless. "I hope you slept well last night."

"Of course."

"I need you four to track down a weapons dealer in Skagway," he explained as he handed Steve a black manila file folder, "shut down the base, download the intel onto the flashdrive. You’ll be staying at a safe house in Juneau afterwards for about a week to keep things on the down-low in case something goes wrong. Simple in-and-out job."

"When are we leaving?" Sam questioned.

"You're taking off in half an hour. Suit up."

You sighed. Finding your soulmate would just have to wait, then.

...

"Y/N, look out!"

You quickly whipped around and narrowly missed a bullet whizzing past you, as Steve tugged you around the corner, an arm wrapped firmly around your torso as he hid you both behind his shield.

You gasped as you felt a sharp pain in your chest, and Steve immediately pulled away from you in alarm, gripping your shoulders worriedly. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” you panted, trying to steady your rapid breathing, “I’m fine. But we’re gonna have to split up from here if we wanna get the job done faster.”

“Y/N, I can’t-”

“Steve,” you interrupted, the firm tone of voice making him immediately shut up. “I can handle myself just fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure! Go find Sam and Bucky, and I’ll meet you guys by the rendezvous point as soon as I’m done. Okay?”

“Alright.” He looked around for a moment before stepping away, as if he was hesitant to leave you on your own.

Ignoring the slight ache in your chest, you parted ways, darting down the hall with your guns up and ears alert.

From there, it was easy to fall into your usual routine. Keep all eyes and ears open; don’t hesitate, shoot on sight unless ordered otherwise. If necessary, engage powers but if not, use your fists or bullets. The mantra repeated itself over and over in your head as you followed through with your job.

You hid behind a tower of wooden crates, back pressed up against the steel walls. “Sam. Status update?”

“Controls room with Barnes, disabling all security systems. Steve’s retrieving intel from the north wing. You?”

“Outside on standby,” you murmured, keeping a finger pressed to your ear. Three technicians were loading equipment onto crates as the other six stood guard several yards away. “I make nine hostiles on the load dock straight ahead at twelve o’clock. Three dozen in total scattered around the area. Most likely preparing for an overseas arms trade. We’ll have to stop them.”

“And...done. We’re heading your way,” Bucky reported. “Be there in three.”

“Roger that.”

Exactly three minutes and two seconds later Bucky showed up, with Steve and Sam in tow. You came out from your hiding spot and began making your way towards the loading dock where the agents were stationed. They were quick to stop what they were doing and noticed the four of you approaching, whipping their snipers out and proceeding to open fire.

...

Your breath came out in white wisps of fog as you got caught in between a fistfight with one of the three dozen men on the docks, the freezing cold slowing all your movements and making them feel more sluggish than usual. If it weren’t for the thick material of your suit and your enhancements, you would’ve succumbed to the harsh weather hours ago.

The man captured you into a tight headlock with his thick arm but despite your frostbite you were too fast; you quickly whipped around and grabbed his wrist, twisting it to the side. His eyes widened slightly as he cried out in pain, the sickening crunch of bone echoing through the frigid Alaskan air as you swiftly dodged each one of moves as he attempted to come at you, countering with a sharp right hook to his jaw.

His body slumped to the ground with a thump.

“Why the hell do you even carry around a sniper if your fists do all the work for you?” Sam yelled over the cacophony as he released Redwing, swooping down from the rooftops. “Seriously, you don’t need guns! You’re strong enough as it is!”

“I prefer versatility in fights, Wilson!” you yelled back, grunting as you dodged a blow to the stomach, sweeping out your attacker’s feet from underneath him as his head smacked against the wall, before sliding down to the ground with a dull thud.

“Y/N, look out-” Bucky called out, but it was too late. You didn’t get to hear his warning in time before you felt something cold and hard hit your lower abdomen. A yell of pain ripped through your throat as you felt a sticky warmth spread across your skin, your knees hitting the ground as you clutched the wound.

At that exact moment, Steve felt a sharp pain flare up his side as well. “Shit,” he cursed to himself, “Buck, cover me so I can get to her.”

You were barely clinging on to life by the time he reached you. Your breathing was heavy and labored, your eyes beginning to roll back as you struggled to stay awake. Everything hurt. Your arms and legs felt like they were weighed down with bricks. You couldn’t move. You couldn’t open your mouth to scream, either - you had no energy left to do so.

“Come on, Y/N, stay with me, please stay with me,” he muttered as he began carefully applying pressure to your wound. You let out a hiss of pain at the same time he did. “Just hang in there for me, please. Sam’s getting the Quinjet ready. We’re gonna get out of here in just a few minutes, okay? Please don’t die on me.”

“Look, if I don’t make it-”

“Don’t say that,” he spoke in between clenched teeth while fighting back tears of his own, “you’re not going to die. Not today, not tomorrow, and certainly not on my watch.”

“Steve…” you croaked out, the stinging from the wound almost becoming impossible to bear. Your eyes were becoming heavier by the second, your body throbbing painfully now that all the adrenaline had worn off. It was a struggle just to take in a single breath and to stay awake. "I'm so tired, I can't do this anymore..."

He disappeared from your line of sight as your began seeing spots at the edges of your vision momentarily, before reappearing and pulling you into his lap, trying to put pressure on the area of injury again in an attempt to stem the bleeding. But it didn’t seem to work. There was so much blood. So much of it, coming out so fast. There was no way you’d last out here for longer than ten minutes before bleeding to death.

"Stay with me..." he murmured as he looked up around him. "Hang in there for a few more minutes, please…Damn it, Sam, how much longer is this gonna take? Y/N’s down. We gotta get her to the safe house as soon as we can. She’s bleeding out.”

"Three minutes, tops. I’m circling the perimeter as an extra precaution," Sam replied. "You guys hang tight for a sec."

"We don't have time!" he raised his voice. "Just hurry the hell over here."

"I'm so sorry," you choked out before going into a coughing fit, blood dripping down your lips and chin much to Steve’s alarm. "I'm sorry for everything, I'm sorry for being reckless and not keeping a look ou—"

"Shhh, it's okay," he soothed, "There’s nothing to be sorry about. Just save your energy for later, okay? You're gonna be just fine."

"Hold my hand," you begged hoarsely.

"I already am," the super-soldier answered, but his look shifted to that of an alarmed one when he realized you couldn't feel it. "Y/N—"

"I'm cold," you said weakly, already feeling your limbs grow heavy and numb and your vision growing blurrier with each passing second. "I'm so tired, Cap, I just wanna sleep—"

"No no no, please don't leave me," he pleaded as he felt his head begin to spin as well. Where had the sudden wave of dizziness come from? "Hang in there for a little longer, please, I l—"

You didn’t get to hear the rest of his sentence before your eyes fluttered shut and everything went dark.

...

When you came to, your throat felt dry and raw, the metallic taste of dried blood around your lips and chin overwhelming your senses as you adjusted your eyes to the harsh bright lights streaming into the room. It looked like you were in some sort of antique coastal house, strangely void of belongings with the only decoration being a plain floral calendar hung on the wall opposite you, above the fireplace.

You were still in your suit, but your wound had been treated and wrapped up in a thick set of bandages. The couch you were on was old but extremely comfortable, so you found yourself not wanting to sit up at the same time you wanted to get up and look around.

The blinds were drawn shut, but the sunlight still managed to shine through. It was light outside, but you weren’t sure what time it really was. The walls were a dull grey, and if you listened hard enough you could hear the faint ticking of a nearby clock and probably Bucky or Sam talking on the phone upstairs with someone in hushed whispers.

You finally pulled yourself up into a sitting position, glancing around at your surroundings. Someone quietly entered the living room and you looked up to see Steve. His shoulders sagged in relief upon seeing that you were awake.

“Hey,” his voice came out so softly it took both of you by surprise. You moved over slightly to make room for him to sit. “How are you feeling?”

“Like crap,” you groaned lightly, feeling a dull ache in your stomach where you’d been hit. “But other than that, I’m fine. What about you? Did you get hurt anywhere?”

“Body aches that come and go, but I’m fine. It isn’t your place to be worrying about me right now though, Y/N. You got shot.”

The curtains fluttered and a cool breeze rushed in, making you shiver. Steve took notice and stood up to go light up the fireplace, then sat back down and wrapped the fleece blanket around your body. You let out a small sigh of contentment. “Thanks.”

“Are you sure you’re alright? You knocked out for over twenty-six hours .”

“I’m fine, Steve, just tired...hey, how’s Bucky and Sam?”

“Sam’s upstairs radioing Fury on the mission status. Bucky’s taking a nap in the guest room.”

“Oh. Okay. So, I-” you were interrupted by a sharp stabbing sensation in your wrist. “Ow. Fuck.”

“Language,” he joked lightly, but when he saw the obvious pained expression on your face, his face fell. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Just...I get those random pains from time to time. I don’t know why, but...they’ve gotten worse since we took off for Skagway and then came here...”

“I’m so sorry,” he apologized, eyes glassy with unshed tears, “I should’ve kept a closer watch over you. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. It’s mine...I should’ve watched my own back better.”

You both fell into an awkward silence for several minutes before he spoke up again, the realization finally dawning on him.

"Y/N."

"What?"

"Your wrist."

Your brows furrowed in confusion as you looked down and saw the star glowing brightly, sending a white-hot pain down your arm. "What about it?"

Steve pulled at his shirt's sleeve for a few seconds before lifting it up to reveal the same exact symbol.

"We're soulmates," you breathed out, the realization hitting you like a flash flood.

"Yeah, I guess we are, huh," he smiled softly.

“W-when did yours appear?”

“Monday afternoon.”

“Mine appeared in the morning...I showed it to Tony and Bruce and they said I had a week to find who it was or both me and my soulmate would die. So I guess we got lucky, huh? Only four more days, then...”

“Yeah, we did,” he exhaled. “I’m glad you’re the one. I can’t imagine living out the rest of my life with anyone else.”

“But Peggy...”

“She found her soulmate decades ago,” he explained, “which explained why our relationship was so short-lived. I didn’t expect to find mine...especially not after coming out of the ice. Maybe I had this coming from the get-go, I’d wonder...”

“Then how come they’d appear now?” Your brows furrowed together in confusion. “I don’t get it. We’ve known each other for years.”

“Because it was only this year that I accepted it.”

“Accepted what?”

“That I’d fallen in love with you, and I kept that inside for far too long.”

“You...what?” You were officially rendered speechless.

“Yeah,” he chuckled lightly, face breaking into a gorgeous, million-dollar grin before turning serious again, lowering his voice. “Y/N, I’m in love with you. You are my infinity and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you. You’re my present and my future, and I hate that I couldn’t see that sooner. I should’ve known from the start that Peggy and I wouldn’t work out, but I never understood why...until I met you. I didn’t believe in the concept of soulmates because I felt I was undeserving of that love, but then you came along...and I started hoping and praying I’d find someone who’d love me as much as I love you. So now that I know for sure it’s you, that it always has been and always will be...I couldn’t be more happier that you’re my soulmate.”

You didn’t realize you were crying until he reached forward to brush your hair away from your face and wipe the stray tears that fell, before wrapping an arm around you and gently pulling you towards him.

“God, I made you cry, I’m so sorry,” he choked on a sob of his own. “I’m the worst.”

“I’m not mad at you, Steve,” you sniffed as you wiped your nose with your sleeve, and looked up and cracked a small grin. “You’re just so cheesy.”

“Can I kiss you?” he whispered, so quiet you almost didn’t catch what he said.

“You can kiss me any day, Captain,” you smiled.

“I love you more than you know.”

“I know. I love you too.”

He then brought a hand up to cup your face, allowing his thumb to lightly skim against your cheek, his warm breath fanning against your skin.

When his lips met yours, it was like you were turning back the clock. Everything in the world stopped and held its breath, and all the hurt, all the sadness and heartache and pain bottled up inside your body, washed away.

...

BONUS

“HOLY SHIT, Y’ALL ARE SOULMATES?”

The sound of Sam’s screeching made you finally break apart for air. You could’ve been like that for two minutes, two hours, or two weeks, you weren’t sure.

You blushed and quickly averted your gaze.

Steve’s face was as red as a tomato. “Yeah. We are.”

“I KNEW IT! I KNEW SOMETHING WAS GONNA HAPPEN BETWEEN THEM SOON! PAY UP, BARNES! YOU OWE ME TWENTY BUCKS.”

“Come on, man,” Bucky groaned, reaching into his jacket pocket and pulling out a crumpled twenty-dollar bill. “We’re gonna head back home soon, anyways! And you’re not even poor.”

“A bet’s a bet, Barnes.”

“Of course you two bet on it,” you groaned. “Classic Sambucky activity.”

...

NINE MONTHS LATER

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride, Captain Rogers,” Fury announced, a rare smile gracing his normally stoic features.

Steve did his best not to break down sobbing as he slid the ring onto your finger. With the backdrop of the waves gently crashing against the shore and the sun slowly sinking lower and lower into the horizon, he leaned down and cupped your face in his hands, passionately pressing his lips to yours. Your soulmarks glowed brightly in tandem, lighting up in a brilliant gold hue.

Needless to say, there wasn’t a single dry eye in the house.

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horancover · 4 years ago

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REBLOGGABLE FLICKER SESSIONS AND FLICKER WORLD TOUR FULL SHOWS MASTERLIST

it’s been a long time but i know im not the only one who misses seeing niall in his element on stage so here is a rebloggable masterlist with all the full shows (both the flicker sessions and fwt) for you to wacth on youtube. i started editing these back in 2017 and uploaded the last one just a few weeks ago so i thought i would share this with the lovely people on tumblr. if you click on the tour title you will be redirected to my playlists on youtube for each tour. enjoy!! xx

FLICKER SESSIONS 2017

august 29: dublin

august 31: london

september 3: stockholm

september 10: sydney

september 14: tokyo

september 19: los angeles

october 1: rio de janeiro

october 29: philadelphia

october 31: new york city

november 1: toronto

november 3: boston

november 4: silver spring

november 6: miami

november 9: orlando

november 10: atlanta

november 13: nashville

november 15: chicago

november 17: dallas

november 20: phoenix

november 22: san francisco

FLICKER WORLD TOUR 2018

march 10: killarney

march 12: dublin

march 13: belfast

march 15: manchester

march 16: manchester, night 2

march 18: glasgow

march 19: glasgow, night 2

march 22: london

march 24: cardiff

march 26: bournemouth

march 27: brighton

march 29: dublin, night 2

april 18: paris

april 19: cologne

april 21: berlin

april 22: copenhagen

april 24: oslo

april 25: stockholm

april 27: hamburg

april 28: amsterdam

april 30: brussels

may 1: munich

may 3: zürich

may 4: vienna

may 6: bologna

may 7: milan

may 9: barcelona

may 11: madrid

may 12: lisbon

june 1: auckland

june 3: brisbane

june 5: sydney

june 7: melbourne

june 10: manila

june 12: singapore

june 14: tokyo

june 15: tokyo, night 2

july 4: santiago

july 6: buenos aires

july 8: rio de janeiro

july 10: são paulo

july 13: mexico city

july 14: mexico city, night 2

july 18: houston

july 20: dallas

july 21: rogers

july 23: nashville

july 25: cincinnati

july 26: tinley park

july 28: tulsa

july 30: salt lake city

july 31: nampa

august 2: auburn

august 4: mountain view

august 5: irvine

august 7: los angeles

august 8: los angeles, night 2

august 17: chula vista

august 18: las vegas

august 20: morrison (red rocks)

august 22: kansas city

august 23: st. paul

august 25: st. louis

august 26: indiana

august 28: detroit

august 29: ohio

august 31: bristow

september 2: allentown

september 5: toronto

september 7: darien

september 8: mansfield

september 11: camden

september 12: jones sbeach

september 14: hartford

september 15: holmdel township

september 19: charlotte

september 20: alphabetta

september 22: tampa

september 23: west palm beach

#my posts #posts about niall #appreciation posts #flicker sessions #flicker world tour #masterlist #niall #niall horan #solo niall #solo niall horan #videos #2017 #2018 #on stage

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ohsayhello · 4 years ago

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Stories on the road #4

I was reminded a few days ago by Instagram that I visited the vibrant city of Singapore 4 years ago to watch Coldplay by myself. Since I was there for 3 days, I decided to explore the city on my own, to look for street art, visit museums and just discover random nooks and crannies.

I’ve always been fascinated by the colorful streets of Singapore. Up until today, I still have this fantasy of moving there permanently. But of course, 4 years has passed and I’m still in Manila. Migrating overseas kinda seem like a faraway dream now, back when I was still in my younger 20s and everything seemed possible.

I hopped from one bus to another just to discover new cafes and artsy places. My first stop was the Central Perk Cafe because I was a big FRIENDS fan. I wanted to cry after seeing how similar the cafe was to Central Perk, the famous coffee shop featured in the series. As I expected, the food in Central Perk was expensive AF but being there was worth it.

Then, I went to the National Museum where I spent hours admiring all the featured artworks. I was amazed by all the shows and exhibits that day. If I could’ve stayed longer, I would. But time was not on my side.

I also spent the other days exploring the colorful streets of Haji Lane. I walked along the nearby streets as well, on the hunt for art. It’s amazing how you’d find art in almost every nook and cranny of Singapore.

Probably my favorite part of exploring was discovering the hidden libraries in malls. A LIBRARY??? IN A MALL??? Damn, my bookworm heart was super happy. I went all the way to Tiong Bahru as well to visit Books Actually (which I believe, is now closed and is fully operating online). I bought a few SingLit books which I read on my way back to my airbnb.

I missed walking around and discovering art. I miss travelling and exploring in general, finding out about hidden nooks and crannies, eating at cute coffee shops and making friends along the way. I wish I could go back in time and visit all these places again.

Singapore | March 2017

#art #street art #singapore #travel #solo travel #writers on tumblr #stories from the road

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purplesurveys · 4 years ago

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964

..leave me here in my..stark raving sick sad little world.. by daizy62

**GENERAL JUNK** How many people do you know with the same first name as you? Two with the exact same spelling, three with a different spelling than mine. What in your opinion is the best love song ever written? Always so much pressure and a lot of thinking to answer superlatives like this...I haven’t listened to all the love songs in existence so I wouldn’t even be credible to begin with. My answer is pretty basic; I love Yellow by Coldplay. What were you doing at this time yesterday? I was either taking a shower or playing with Cooper, I can’t remember well. Have you done anything drastic to alter your physical appearance recently? No. I’m not the biggest fan of change, and that trickles down to my physical appearance. I like to stay where I am and only ever act on change if I get an extreme urge, like earlier this year when I got my bangs and had my hair cut all the way to my neck. Is there anything bothering you right now? Sadly there always is now. It’s gonna be lingering for a while and all I can do is wait it out. I hate not being in control of things, and that bothers me too.

Are you wearing shoes right now? No. No shoes are allowed beyond the first few steps from our front door.

How old were you in 2005? I was 7 and starting first grade. Pro-life/Pro-choice? Choice. Are you wearing anything purple? I guess some would consider it purple. My shorts are in the middle of being pink and purple, so I’m sure some level of confusion is bound to come up if people were to tell what color they think it is. Do you live east or west of the Mississippi River? I live very far away from it. Have you ever been to Chicago? No but it’s my favorite city in the US. If I had to go to the country one day, it has to be a trip to Chicago and nothing more. Do you drive a stick-shift? Nope. Never learned, not really willing to. Have you kissed anyone who's name started with A, K, M, or T? No. Do you have a sister? Yep, a younger one. Where are you right now? I’m in my room, at my desk. Do you straighten your hair? Never. Not a good look on me. Do you have a gym membership? No. I’ve never been interested. Can you count to 10 in another language? Of course. Is there a calendar in the room you are in? There are digital ones on my phone and laptop, but I’ve never put up a physical calendar in my room. Is it possible you could be pregnant? Hah, not a chance. How long is it until your birthday? 7 months. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you? I know one person in real life; the rest are celebrities. Was your mother married when she had you? Yeah, I was born less than a week before their first wedding anniversary. Would you ever go skinny dipping with your #1? **LASTS** What was the last thing you drank? I finished up the last few drops of my coffee from my mug last night. Last thing you ate? A pizza roll. I think I’m gonna be called for breakfast in a few minutes though. What was the last movie you watched in theaters? Knives Out, last December. I’ve been giving the same answer for months now lmao. I wish I can watch movies at the theatres again. What was the last thing you watched on tv? The evening news last Friday. That’s the only thing I watch on an actual TV these days. I prefer watching everything else on my phone or laptop now. Who was the last person to text you? Andrew. They checked up on me last night – I’m guessing they’ve noticed I’ve gone off the radar on all social media, so I appreciate the words they gave me. They made me feel present. Who was the last person to call you? My dad. I heated up water last night to make coffee but I didn’t want to keep waiting downstairs, so I told him I was gonna head to my room first and to just text me if the water’s all ready. He ended up calling my phone.

Where was the last place you went? Bathroom, to take a shower. When did you last hang out with your 22nd phone contact? I have not seen him since March, and I think the last time we were together was at a local protest in my college. We’re not friends though so I think it’s too much to call it ‘hanging out’ lol. Our relationship was mostly professional. Who was the last person to comment you? I haven’t been on social media for a week or two now, so I no longer remember who commented on any of my statuses or tweets last. Ate Alyanna maybe? Aliyah? I really have no clue. When was the last time you kissed someone? Just a little less than a month ago. When was the last time you stayed out all night? 2017, I think? I enjoy staying up til like 2 or 3 AM, but pulling all-nighters just sounds like way too much. I like being able to catch up on sleep because not enough of it makes me cranky. When was the last time you went to Walmart? I’ve never been inside one. What is the last digit of your phone number? 5. When was the last time you were in the car for more than an hour? There was a short period last month where I’d go to my car and stay there for an hour or so whenever I started to feel especially distraught, so that I can have a good cry alone for as long as I want and be loud if I needed to. But I’m really glad it never developed into a full-blown habit and that I only did it a handful of times. Where was your last vacation to? It was a quick weekend trip rather than a vacation, but we went to Tagaytay and Cavite. Ugh, I reeeeeally miss going out of town... Who was the last person you rode in a car with? It’s been a while since I was in a car with anyone since I usually drive on my own and the only being I’ve been bringing with me is Cooper. I think the last people were my parents. When was the last time you had to be up before 7 AM? Two weeks ago for my job interview. I dunno if it’s right to say that I had to be up before 7 AM since the lockdown has greatly reduced the traffic in Manila and I didn’t need to get on the road super early to beat the traffic, but I still set my alarm to around 5:30 AM anyway because I like allotting several hours to prepare for things as important as that. Who was the last person(s) you took a photo with? I haven’t done that with anyone other than my dogs. My camera roll’s been devoid of other people for the past few months. When was the last time you saw your dad? Like half an hour ago. Why did you cry the last time you did? Because the sads had finally hit me and I started feeling worthless again. When was the last time someone gave you a compliment? Sometime last week. Apparently my mom and aunt got to talking about me and my new job and my aunt apparently complimented me on my chosen career field and said that I was a better fit for PR than journalism and broadcasting, which is what everyone in my family originally expected me to land in. That really means a lot, considering how much happier I am in this path.

When was the last time you locked your keys in the car/locked yourself out? I locked myself out sometime in late 2019, but it was because my key to the front door fell out of my keychain while I was in school and I never noticed :( What was the last thing you spent money on? We had Kimi trimmed and groomed the other day. When did you last see your #2? **FINISH THE SENTENCE** I should probably: Discover a new hobby that can help with my mental health and overall wellness. Crocheting? Baking? Working out? All sound good at the moment. We’ll see. When I can't sleep: I pick out a few YouTube videos to watch and keep me company until I start feeling sleepy. I need more: Happiness. Right now I would love: For things to settle back into normal again. I feel like I’m living in the middle of a nightmare. My last kiss was: A month ago. If I could, I would: Move and start anew somewhere else. When I'm pissed: I need to be alone so that I don’t end up accidentally exploding on someone who doesn’t deserve it. I am listening to: Rhett and Link trying unconventional dumplings. I never leave the house without: Phone, keys, wallet. I believe in: Gender equality, marriage equality, pay equality. Granting people their rights, basically. I am wearing: A shirt all the way from high school. I tend to daydream when: I’m bored and stuck somewhere I can’t leave, like a boring class lecture. My grandma is: They *are* amazing cooks. After this I am going to: Try to find another survey to take...or maybe find something in the pantry to eat because my stomach’s grumbling a bit, ha.

#surveys #survey

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