#Mhh there bit to much hair around my ears let me cut some

[narmothewraith]

Do I sometimes cut my hair randomly??

It's more likely than you think and I fuck my hair up everytime 👀😭😂

I just give me accidentally sort of a mullet, literally the day before going on vacation and I'm kinda scared what my parents gonna say🥴🥴

Atleast from the front it's okayish

[pockyxx]

“ drunk in love ”

bokuto x fem!reader

genre: fluff. tw. alcohol, getting drunk. atsumu and hinata being troublemakers. fluff.

with it being new year’s eve, the msby jackals often had parties but this year one of their sponsors, the ceo of bouncy ball corp. had invited them to his penthouse for a celebration.

you being bokuto kōtarō’s girlfriend, it only a made sense for you to join him in the celebrations. he’d been talking about the party for a week in advice, telling you all about how he had kenma had been well acquainted through his friend kuroo way back in highschool.

“you ready?” he asked, as you put the finishing touches on your look, scanning over yourself in the bathroom mirror.

bokuto leaned against the doorframe, his large figure practically blocking your entrance. turning to face him, he’d really put his act together— hair gelled back nicely, expensive watch and a nice suit he had tailored for him.

“i am now, let’s go.” you bounced over to his side, ready to let the night take you away. kenma’s penthouse was nice but what else do you expect from a ceo?

“thank you so much for hosting this party, kenma-san.” you told him, holding a glass of wine while talking to the man. you had lost sight of your boyfriend but you knew he’d be with one of his teammates.

kenma shook his head, telling you not to worry about it while you cautiously scanned your eyes around the room. “you haven’t seen bo, have you?” kenma shook his head again.

“hm, i should probably find him, then.” you joke, leaving him behind in search of your boyfriend. it was well known that bokuto was a lightweight when it came to alochol so even just a few glasses could get him drunk.

you heard the chuckling from atsumu and hinata from the kitchen despite the door being closed. raising a suspicious eyebrow, you pressed your ear to the door. you were surprised to hear kōtarō’s groan.

“bo, are you in here?-” you asked opening the door, only to be cut off but the shock of seeing bokuto in a cabinet, an empty bottle of champagne in front of him.

snapping your attention to his team mates who couldn’t stop themselves from laughing, another empty bottle between them.

“how much did he drink?” your eyes wide, waiting for an answer. bokuto slurred out a response but it was barely auditable.

“he drank the whole thing?” hinata pointed out and you thought you were going to faint.

“why?!” you starting walking up to your boyfriend, crouching down to where he was. it was hard to believe a 6’4 man could fit in such a small cabinet.

“we called him a light weight, and he denied to so tsumtsum said ‘prove it.’” hinata answered, clearly the most sober of the bunch. you shot daggers at the setter before gesturing bokuto to crawl out from his hiding spot.

“argh, my head hurts!” he whined, rubbing his temple.

“i know it does— just come out and i’ll get you a glass of water.” he pouted and got out nonetheless.

sober bokuto was childish, yes, but he could also restrain himself in public. now near black out drunk bokuto had little no control and it was similar to taking care of a big baby.

he almost fell over and you tried to catch him, almost toppling over yourself.

“‘cmon bo, go lay down on the couch, ‘kay?” you looked at your watch, great it wasn’t even 11:30 what were you going to do with your boyfriend until midnight? or would it just be best to go home now?

bokuto stumbled onto the couch, groaning and holding his head. you were going to kill atsumu and hinata the next day for getting bokuto like this.

you rushed back to where bokuto was laying with a glass of water in hand. you sat next to his laying figure and ran your spare hand up and down him back.

“bo, you need to sit up to drink your water.” he continued to mutter incoherent words as he slowly but surely sat up, taking the cup from your hands. bokuto pressed the glass to his lips, drinking the water at an excruciatingly slow pace.

he turned his head in the slightest bit to see you before turning even more red than he already was in his flushed out-drunk state.

“you’re really pretty yknow?” it was his first clear sentence of the night and you giggled, falling back into the couch. bitting your lip you thought it would be funny to tease your boyfriend just a little bit.

“sorry but i have a boyfriend.” you joked around, not sure how bokuto would act now that all his senses were fogged up.

bokuto pouted and rested his head onto your lap, holding onto your thigh like it was a teddy bear.

“then where is he? he shouldn’t leave you here all alone~” is what you managed to make out of the slurs he uttered against your thighs.

shaking your head with a small laugh, you started playing with strands of his hair as he continued mumbling things to himself.

“well he’s pretty lucky...” his eyes drifted shut, as you giggled you kept listening to his drunk confessions, “hmph, even if you were single, i have a girlfriend too... mhh she’s the best.” his drunk expression turned into a smile.

“kōtarō sit up so i can get you some more water.” you cooed into his ear and he blushed.

“you shouldn’t call me by my first name i-i have a girlfriend— where is y/n?” his panic made you last once again.

“bo~” you hummed, which caught his attention. realizing that he was in fact sitting on your lap made him cover his eyes with his hands out of embarrassment. finally, he let you get up after apologizing numerous times.

when you came back, you were met by a completely different bokuto— this one being much, much flirtier.

“hehe, y/n are you a parking ticket? because you have ‘fine written all over you.” he leaned his head onto your shoulder, and the cheesy pick up lines did not end there.

“hmm, how bout you and me go home have some more fun.” he kissed your neck and you pushed him off of you.

“kō, it’s not even mind night, plus your drunk.” you scolded him and he proceeded to pout, taking your hand and giving it a wet, sloppy kiss.

“drunk in love~” he commented which made you take back your hand, forcing him to drink more water.

throughout the next thirty minutes, you were taking care of him on the couch, bringing him more and more water to drink while he complained about his head hurting and feeling dizzy.

you looked at the time, 11:48 pm. you sighed, helping bokuto to the bathroom where he then proceeded to throw his guts up and you gently rubbed his back.

thankfully, kenma had spare toothbrushes and toothpaste on hand.

you asked bokuto if he wanted to go home but he only shook his head, most of the substance already having left his body.

“i need to have my midnight kiss with you.” he placed his hand on your chest, slumping down to do so. “so i can wait a bit.”

“but if your not feeling well, let’s go home-” he cut you off by placing his finger against your lip, looking back to the main room, people starting to gather.

“besides the countdown is about to begin.”

bokuto was always clinging, and that clingyness only heightened when intoxicated. he kept you in his arms, slowly swaying and leaning onto you for balance as the countdown got start.

“4...3...2...1... happy new year!” everyone said together. you to face bokuto as confetti and steamers launched into the air.

wrapping your arms around his neck, you could feel his hands being placed onto your waist, him squeezing you tightly.

“happy new year bo.” you quickly whispered to him, and his response being to place his new years kiss onto you lips, dipping you forward.

you cupped his face, feeling him rub at your lip with his teeth. giggly, you backed away, taking in his still very flushed cheeks.

“i think it’s time to go home, boy are you gonna have a hang over tommrow.” now, bokuto couldn’t protest as you said goodbye to kenma and some of the other mbsy jackals members before making your way home with your boyfriend.

[seodami]

Our story | LSM

Part 2

This is our story. From the day we met till the day we part. Black on white, our most precious moments, never leaving us. I love your forever.

LSM

Genre: Fluffffff

Warnings: none

Word count: 2271

Pairing: Idol!Lee Seokmin x fashion student reader

Note: Here is the second part and I have to say I really enjoyed writing this, imagining how easy and funny it must be to talk to DK :)) what would I do to talk to him once :’) Enjoy!

Previous | Next

Our story Masterlist | MASTERLIST

You both were frozen in your tracks for a moment, you still panicking about what to say or do and him wondering why there was a stranger in his kitchen.

Seokmin hadn’t been feeling well since yesterday evening so since he was feeling even worse this morning, Seungcheol and his manager wanted him both to stay home for at least today until he felt better. He wasn’t exactly keen on staying in an empty apartment alone all day, especially when he wanted to be a part of their schedule. It often made him feel lonely and miss his members. It was stupid honestly, he thought. He saw them everyday and often needed his alone time at times, but he still felt so empty without anyone around.

He was still sleeping when he faintly heard the doorbell ring. Yet he thought it was just in his dream. But when he soon later slowly woke up due to noices from the kitchen, Seokmin wondered if their aunty might have come and would make him a warm soup for his sore throat.

So with still messy hair and puffy face, he made his way over to the kitchen with tiny steps, just to be greeted by a strange face of a girl he never saw.

“O-oh my god. I’m so sorry. I thought no one was home?” You stuttered out totally embarrassed to actually be caught. That was your doom day. Dokyeom found the rambling rather endearing, yet he cautiously made his way over to the kitchen aisle, you were working on.

It took you by huge surprise how handsome and cute this man could look at the same time. Were all idols this pretty?

“Uhm... hi... I don’t want to sound rude but I really... have no idea who you are.” The boy a few feet away from you came to an halt. His voice was a tad hoarse and he sounded a bit sick. He let out a shy chuckle, clearly feeling somewhat uncomfortable in this situation.

Little did you know, the little voice in his head was laughing at him how ridiculous and ugly he must’ve looked with his bare face right after bed. Seokmin had always had his insecurities about his body or face. He never seemed to fully like the way he looked. He would cringe so much looking back at his old childhood pictures, when he had a few pounds too much on him. It just never dawned him how his fans would call him handsome. Most of the times he would just smile and thank them but never really accepting their compliments, thinking it must be the good make up or the stylish hair. Yes, that must be it.

And now standing in front of a pretty woman, he felt it in every fibre of his body and it made him unbelievably uncomfortable.

“Oh... Right... I am Oh Jangmi’s daughter. Nice to meet you.” You quickly muttered, not daring to look him in his eyes for more than a second. You bowed as you typically did, seeing him bow as well.

“Oh aunties daughter? She told us a lot about you. Nice to finally meet you. I’m Dokyeom.” His uncomfortable face was immediately replaced by the brightest smile, you had ever seen. You swear, in that moment, your heart melted in an instant. You heard your heart beating loudly in your ears, unable to grasp this mans beauty. Never ever have you seen such a dazzling smile in person.

“Is aunty not coming today?” He asked curiously leaning against the other side of the aisle. He was way too close for your liking. And you were definitely still panicking. This man was more than gorgeous.

You shook your head, noticing his hoarse voice. “No unfortunately s-she broke her foot on the way here and went to the hospital. So she... asked me to step in for her. She will be coming tomorrow again though.” You completed your sentence while only taking short glances at the male in front of you, who was giving you 100% of his attention. You were more than flustered.

A worried expression replaced his smile. “Oh no... is she alright?” Your heart made a small jump.

You nodded with a small smile, fiddling with potato in your hand. He noticed and hummed. “Do you need help cooking? I mean... I’m not the best but I can chop vegetables without chopping my fingers off I guess.” He smiled at you once more. If he would keep smiling like that, you swear, you wouldn’t be able to see tomorrow.

You let out a small giggle, still denying his offer. “Ah no... it’s fine really. I’m just making jajangmyeon. And you sound like you’ve caught a cold so I won’t be bothering you with doing anything.”

You quickly placed the potato in your hand on the cutting board and started slicing it into small cubes.

“Yeah I actually did. It’s not really pleasant to be honest.” Dokyeom said before caughting in his elbow as on queue.

“Wait a second. I’m gonna make you a tea. I’m a pro in dealing with colds, trust me.” You insisted, already reaching for the water boiler to fill it up with fresh water.

“Thank you. You really don’t have to though.” He giggled coughing again.

“No I want to. I’m sure you will feel better after this tea. I made it every time my siblings were ill.” You smiled at him, feeling already a tad more comfortable with this man, you literally just met.

Seokmin took a seat in one of the high chairs on his side of the kitchen aisle while watching you chop the vegetables. He noticed how soft your hair looked like, falling gently onto your face. He took his phone out to check his messages. There were just a few from his manager about their usual schedule and some silly messages in their group chat. He softly giggled reading through all of them, wondering how he even got friends like this.

You couldn’t help stealing short glances here and there at the beautiful man, noticing how he swept his fluffy bed hair with one hand out of his face. Something about him was immensely attractive and you couldn’t pinpoint what exactly it was. But hell no, you were not going to develop a crush on a man you literally met one time. Nope. All idols would probably have this effect on you, right? They weren’t idols without a reason.

Soon enough you finished Dokyeoms tea with a last pinch of fresh mint leaves and handed it over to him with a smile. He thanked you, white teeth showing and crescent eyes forming. Melting, definitely melting.

“Wow... It’s very good.” He carefully slurped from the warm tea. You sent him a bright smile, deep down thanking your tea making skills you’ve even improved thanks to your job at the café. That was definitely a pro from working there.

“I sometimes work in a small café, so I had plenty of time to practice. I probably could make you every drink you want.” You laughed while taking out a frying pan to avoid his interested eyes following your every movement.

His laugh mused in with yours. “I always wanted to know someone, who could just magically let all the drinks I wanted appear in my kitchen. Thank god I stayed at home today.”

You both were pleasantly surprised how easy talking to each other was. There was a spark of fun in your conversation, which you both couldn’t get enough of. There weren’t many people you knew, If any, who you just clicked with so easily. It was definitely weird but you liked it.

“The food will still take a bit so you are free to make one more drink wish.” You chuckled, glancing over at Dokyeom leaning his head in the palm of his hand.

A genuine smile was displayed across his lips. “Mhh I have to think, this is a very important desicion, I don’t want to make a mistake.” You both snickered in unison. My god, how were you getting along so well with him?

“Alright, you still have exactly 28 minutes and a half to decide.”

“How generous, I will think about it.” His smile was even brighter now, it was impossible not to smile. There was just something about it that gave you an enormous serotonin boost and transformed you into one of these giggly anime Highschool girls. The bad thing was, you didn’t even remember acting that was after experiencing such a rush of being in his proximity. You liked it more than you could have imagined.

However, this was just the starting point of your wholesome conversation this day. It all just came so naturally, you nearly forgot to keep cooking. Seokmin on his side felt incredibly happy compared to his usual happy demeanor. He truly enjoyed your back and forth conversations and he felt greatly satisfied, seeing a bright smile or hearing you laugh because of his comments. It was at times like this when he remembered how much he missed talking to new people, especially when the two of you were obviously on the same wave length. He kept forgetting that he probably shouldn’t talk that much when he was sick but he just couldn’t stop, even if you mentioned it more than three times already. He enjoyed it that much.

You two talked about funny stories of your mom, ridiculous ones of the other members (you really wouldn’t have expected an idol group to be this funny) and also about your own interests, hobbies and families. You snorted when he told you how their trio Booseoksoon sang one of their songs at his sisters wedding in order to make the married couple kiss. The more you got to know each other, the more you forgot how time actually flied.

He even begged you to stay and eat with him when you finally finished cooking, which you hesitantly accepted after seeing his pleading puppy look. What did you get yourself into?

While eating, you told him excitedly about your new fashion projects, you were working on. He was more than hooked listening to every detail. He always loved it when people told him about their passion and he could clearly see that this was yours with how vivid your eyes were beaming and how big your smile grew. It secretly increased the warmth in his heart more and more.

It was the same look he had on his face as he told you about his fans, their next album preparations and the amazing concerts all around the world. You just loved listening to him, even though you both probably finished eating since over an hour already. Sitting so close to him while looking at his dark shining eyes made your brain just automatically foggy.

It only was when your friend and roommate Minji called to ask where you were for your groups project meeting, that you realised how long you actually let yourself swaying in Dokyeoms presence. You were already over half an hour late to your meeting.

You quickly told her you were on your way and hung up, while carrying the plates to the sink. Seokmins sad eyes followed you as he stood up to help you. “You have to go?” He asked immediately, now standing next to you, taking the plates out of your hands, while towering a good piece over you.

You nodded with a sad smile, suddenly feeling every effect he had on you even stronger.

“Yeah I’m sorry. I already stayed way too long. My group is going to kill me.” You tried joking. He chuckled, searching for your eyes.

Seokmin knew when he was interested in a person and it even was obvious for him that you sparked a deep interest inside of him after today. He just knew he wanted to see you again.

“I really enjoyed talking to you. It’s rare to have such a nice conversation. I literally forgot time.” His rich chocolate eyes met yours. “Yeah, I feel the same...” you chocked out, heart beating way too fast again. What was it with your heart today?

“Are you coming over again or...?” He asked almost timidly while fiddling with the hem of his shirt. He looked adorable. Absolutely adorable.

You sent him a shy smile, shrugging your shoulders. “Maybe... I am kind of busy this month because of work and university. But... I would love to talk to you again.” A sudden wave of confidence hit you and took even you by surprise.

A sigh of relief was heard from his side and you giggled. “Thank god. I really wanted to ask you for your phone number.”

God he really was adorable. Such a cutie.

With a grin, you searched for a piece of paper and a pen nearby and quickly scribbled your number onto it. You really had no worry about him being secretly a creep so why not.

“Here you go. Oh and I still didn’t make you your second free drink, so make sure to text me with your order.” There you both went into a giggling mess again.

“Will do. It’s all I’m thinking about.”

So after swiftly cleaning the plates together and saying goodbye and also telling him to get better soon, you made your way out of the building with such an energy, you had no idea where it came from. But you loved how you felt after spending time with Dokyeom. And you were definitely looking forward to your next meeting.

[babybirdgyeom]

you, me and bertha (3) | park jinyoung

⇴ neighbor!au, farmer!au, jinyoung x reader.

⇴ summary: moving from the big city to your uncle’s farm in the small village you used to visit as a child was a big and scary step. luckily, you found many reasons to stay. reasons like your cousin bambam, your best friend jaebum or park jinyoung, your neighbor who maybe was more than just a guy you like to nag around with.

⇴ this chapter: it’s your birthday, jinyoung walks you home late at night and you have a quite interesting conversation with jaebum and bambam.

⇴ word count: this part:  5.5k   full story: ~30k

⇴ all the other parts can be found in my masterlist, linked in my bio! ♥

Waking up, you immediately had a smile on your face - it’s not like anyone besides Bambam and Minwoo, maybe also Jaebum, would know it’s your birthday today but you still loved your special day. How could you not?

The first thing you did that morning was looking at your phone, happy to see that your friends from home - or more like what used to be home to you - all thought of you and send you very nice birthday greetings full of love. In no time you got up and dressed to go over to the main house.

“So, what do you want to do today?”, Bambam asked you as you, for a change, had breakfast with him and your uncle. They were really cute, they made you some scrambled eggs and cut a lot of vegetables from the Park’s farm, Bambam even managed to go to the heart of the city to buy some buns for all of you.

Stretching yourself while yawning, you thought about  Bam’s question. “I actually don’t know, didn’t plan anything yet.”, you said shrugging before eating a piece of pepper, “Any ideas?”

“Why don’t you invite your friends over, (y/n)?”, your uncle suggested but you’d rather not. The problem with inviting people over is you can’t leave early since they are literally at your own place. 

“No way, I don’t even think most people know about my birthday. I’ll stay lowkey about it.”, you said, just wanting to have a nice night on the couch after you took a long bath - an ideal night for you, “I’ll get comfortable at home and watch something, do you wanna join and have a movie night?”, you asked your two family members but they didn’t seem to show much support to your idea.

Uncle Minwoo immediately interrupted you, “I’m not letting you stay at home with your old uncle and cousin on your birthday.”

“I’d love that though. We hadn’t had a movie night in a long time.”, you pouted towards your uncle despite knowing you had no chance against him.

“Bambam, take her to the pub, alright?”, he looked at his son who was currently not listening to the ongoing conversation and instead was texting someone.

“Mhh.”, he agreed with his father before looking up from his phone, “I’ll take you to the pub later, (y/n). No discussion.”, he said.

So a few hours later you found yourself in your small, but very lovely looking, bathroom - putting on a real full face make-up for the first time since you arrived. Bam said to make sure that you looked nice since a lot of other people would be there, including the girl he ‘sometimes takes out’, as he likes to call it. Even though you were not really in the mood and would have really preferred a relaxed movie night with your family you thought that looking good and getting ready every now and then wouldn’t hurt - and maybe, just maybe, Jinyoung would be there too.

Bam picked you up from your little house at around eight in the evening, “Hey little one.”, he said lovingly, “You look good! Want to impress Park Jinyoung, right?”

By now you really regretted that you told him about your attraction for the boy next door, he wouldn’t stop mentioning it. You prayed he didn’t tell Jinyoung about it, his ego was big enough and you didn’t know if you could survive if he’d become even cockier. Jinyoung knew how good he looked and that he could probably get just any girl if he wanted so you weren’t going to give him this satisfaction.

“I’ll kill you if you don’t shut your mouth, Bambam.”, you threatened him, not wanting to talk to your cousin about him.

Arriving at the Pub you couldn’t help but smile - all of your friends were waiting inside, a whole booth waiting just for you. Jaebum was the first to welcome you, hugging you tightly, “Happy Birthday, princess.”, he almost whispered into your ear before the other people were waiting for their turn to congratulate you. Jackson and Mark were there, including Mark’s girlfriend, that you hadn’t met before. Yugyeom, of course, was there and even gifted you some sunflowers, “Those are my favorite!”, you told him excited, to which he replied that he knew. Bam introduced you to his almost-girlfriend and she seemed to be a nice girl, almost as tall as him, with cute glasses, short blue hair and a nose ring that she pulled off amazingly. Jaebum was sitting next to a girl and you made a mental note to ask him about her later on. And last but not least Park Jinyoung was standing in front of you, trying to look annoyed like always, but you saw that he was hiding his smile.

“You’re here!”, you said, genuinely excited, “I feel honored.”

He shook his head joyful, “Don’t let it get to your head. Happy birthday, farmer girl.”, for the first time ever Jinyoung hugged you, and you hated to admit that it felt quite comforting - the hug didn’t feel awkward or forced at all, he even had his one hand on your head, right in your hair.

Jaebum and Bambam, who were standing behind Jinyoung, were inspecting the hug exactly, teasing you secretly, drawing hearts with their fingers as you turned almost as red as the Park’s tomatoes.

“(Y/n), we got a present for you! Come on, sit down.”, Jackson screamed from the table and Jinyoung let you go, way too early for your liking, but you weren’t complaining. As you sat down beside Jaebum, Jinyoung sat right next to you, pretty close since you were sitting on a small bank with five people. The booth was decorated with a paper chain that spelled “Happy Birthday”, a few presents were waiting for you on the table, next to many glasses and several bottles of alcohol.

“This one is from me, Jackson and Youngjae.”, Mark said excited, handing you a present - it had the prettiest wrapping paper and looked very cute. As you opened it you couldn’t help but pout, they gifted you a frame of the four of you when you were little, you were maybe around three to four years old. “That’s literally very lovely, guys. Thank you!”

Jackson let out a laugh, “There’s a little wheel on the side that you have to move.”, he said and so you did - as you turned the little wheel more pictures of all of you showed, all of them from different years. “I love it.”, you said smiling, “It’ll get a special place in my hut, I promise.”

“Open our’s next.”, Jaebum said, a smirk on his face. “It’s from me and Bam.”, you didn’t trust them at all.

“I bet it’ll get also a very, very special place in your hut.”, Bam assured you and you just knew at that point they probably got you something very stupid.

And they did - you let out a deep breath, being completely done with them. “Thanks, I really needed that.”, you said sarcastically as you hold the box of the vibrator they gifted you in your hand.

“We know the nights get lonely here.”, Jaebum said, laughing, “Much fun with it. Just call Jinyoung if you need any help with it.”

“Yeah, no, thanks, I think I can handle that on my own.”, you said, rolling your eyes, but still chuckling a bit, “I really need a shot now.”

Jaebum immediately poured a round of shots for everyone, “To our little (y/n).”

All of your friends clinked glasses and downed the shot. Within a few hours, one shot became quite a few. Bambam and his girl were making out heavily in the corner of the pub, Jaebum, you, Youngjae, Mark and Jinyoung were currently playing a card drinking game that you not only never heard of before but was also killing you slowly.

“(Y/n), your turn.”, Jinyoung looked at you, raising his eyebrow, “Red or black?”, that was the whole point of the game. You had to say a color and if the card didn’t have the color you had to take a shot. Youngjae said it was the best game to get really drunk really fast, and boy, he was right. “Red”, you said or to be exact, mumbled, since you couldn’t talk normally anymore.

And, of course, luck wasn’t on your side - as Jinyoung turned around the card it showed black. “Jinyoung-”, you let out a whine as he laughed, “I literally cannot drink that or else I’ll throw up.”

Your head was turning and your stomach felt warm and tingly, you suddenly felt playful and giggly, which was very unusual for you. Looking at Jinyoung you felt something deep down in your tummy - hoping it was the alcohol.

He looked at you with a soft pout on his lip, “You’re no fun.”, he said before taking the shot, “I’ll take it for you since it’s your birthday.”

“Oh, what a gentleman you are.”, you nudged him.

“Just trying to get drunk.”, he said laughing before downing the shot.

You looked at Yugyeom, who was already very drunk, his eyes slowly closing. “Yugyeom!”, you said to him, not sure if you should laugh or be concerned, “Are you passing out?”

“Hmm?”, he said, trying to open his eyes but failing, “Oh no. I’m just taking a nap.”

You looked to Jinyoung beside you, questioning him what to do. “Are you going to babysit him?”

He scoffed, “That isn’t my problem to deal with.”

About two hours later you decided that it was time to go home, you actually enjoyed the evening despite you not wanting to go originally. You thanked everyone and started to grab your stuff.

“What about you?”, you asked Jinyoung who was sitting on his phone, “You’re staying?”

He looked up from his phone, “No, I’m walking you home. Give me a second.”

You decided to wait outside, needing some fresh air. You immediately felt more sober than inside of the pub, the cold air working its wonders.

Slowly, you started to walk towards your home, knowing Jinyoung would catch up in no time. And he did, of course.

“Oh!”, Jinyoung looked at you with wide eyes as he was next to you, before opening his bag, looking for something, “It’s your birthday!”

“No shit, Sherlock.”, you said unimpressed at his sudden realization, walking through the little city at night, still not used to how beautiful the stars were here.

“No, wait. I actually got you something.”, he mumbled and you thought you heard wrong for a second. At least until Jinyoung, who now managed to catch up with you, handed you a box, a rather big one.

“Are you serious?”, you asked, suddenly feeling shy. This morning you still were convinced he didn’t even know it was your birthday but now he was standing in front of you, with a present that was neatly wrapped in yellow wrapping paper.

“Don’t make a big deal out of it, please.”, he said rolling his eyes as you two walked through the dark night, only a few lanterns on your way home, “Just open it. It felt wrong not to get you anything. I mean, we’re neighbors now, and also co-workers.”

You smirked up at him, playfully asking, “Maybe even friends?”

His laugh seemed to be even louder and happier when he’s drunk, “Says who? You wish!” before immediately adding, “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Maybe even that. Now open it. Let’s sit down.”, your neighbor at the bank on the side of the way, a few steps away.

He took out his phone to turn on the flashlight so you could see, sitting dangerously close to you. “Why didn’t you give it to me earlier?”, you asked him curiously.

“You know, I gotta keep my cool reputation in front of them.”, he joked.

“Ah, can’t let them know that you have a crush on me?”, you blurted out, trying to flirt, knowing you would never say those things if it wasn’t for all the shots you drank earlier.

“You’re a pain in the ass.”, he chuckled, mocking you a bit, “Will you please just open it now? There are a few smaller things.”

As you ripped open the wrapping paper and opened the box your presents were in you immediately smiled, impressed by his first present, “A raincoat? I could’ve seen that coming.”

“I still can’t believe you don’t own one. Look underneath, there’s also a shirt you can use for work so you won’t ruin your good clothes.”, he said, almost proud.

The shirt was grey and oversized - and also, there was a picture printed onto it. Jinyoung let out another laugh before you could see what was on it. As he shined his flashlight on the picture you were not only extremely amused but also very amazed that he did that for you, even though he obviously was trying to be funny, you genuinely liked it - the picture was a selfie of Jinyoung, giving a thumbs up, right next to his favorite being on this earth, Bertha. Underneath the picture the sentence ‘(y/n), you can do it, maybe.’ was written in big letters.

“You’re seriously the worst.”, you laughed, wondering how in the hell he got this idea. Maybe, after all, Jinyoung was actually a quite nice man. Not that you didn’t like him before, you just thought that he didn’t like you back.

“I think you’ll look quite good in it, (y/n).”, he almost giggled.

“You’re such a flirt.”, you said sarcastically.

The last gift in the box really got to you though - it immediately brought back a lot of memories, cherished ones, of your childhood. You felt like you were not able to breathe for a second. How did he even get this?

“Jinyoung, I- I-”, was all you could say, “is it what I think it is?”, you asked amazed, not believing your eyes.

“If you think it’s your old music box that played Somewhere Over The Rainbow over and over again, then it is, yes.”

You totally forgot about it until now, back in the day you always used to play it before going to bed, falling asleep immediately to the soothing sound of it.

“Where did you even get this?”, you asked him, trying to hold back your tears, knowing he’d make fun of you.

“Oh, Minwoo gave it to me to calm the cows on thunder days.”, he said amused.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Do you like it?”, he asked, turning towards you, “I know how obsessed you were with it as a child so I thought you’d like to have it back. The cows didn’t like it anyway.”

You looked at him, not knowing what to say. He was so cool about it when to you, this might be one of the most meaningful presents you’ve ever gotten. The fact that he even remembered how in love you were with this music box and how thoughtful of him it was to give it back to you. Slowly you put the box down, a bit overwhelmed. It was probably stupid, for him it was just a simple present and you were probably overreacting, right? But still, it was so much more than you would’ve expected.

“I love it, Jinyoung.”, you were now looking at him, the wrinkles around his eyes, that came out whenever he was smiling, deeper than you’ve ever seen them before. “Thank you so much.”

Before he could say something to ruin the moment you wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your face in his neck. It took him a few moments to realize what was happening, a hug was something he didn’t expect at all, but it did feel nice. His arms carefully found your waist and hugged you back.

You could see how red his cheeks were as your hug ended but for once you decided to not tease him, not wanting to ruin a genuinely nice moment. The two of you didn’t have those very often.

“Shall we go home?”, Jinyoung asked softly as he stood up, waiting for you to join him.

The two of you were walking for a while, way slower than usual. It might be the alcohol in your veins or simply the secret desire to spend some more time together, alone and outside of the farm.

“Be honest.”, you said happily, it almost sounded like you were singing it, “You think I’m cute.”, you said looking up to Jinyoung who was smiling and didn’t seem to care about your teasing anymore.

“I do think you’re cute. That doesn’t make you less any annoying though.”, he said shaking his head amused, as you were walking and your shoulders were lightly touching every now and then, a rush of excitement going through your body every single time. “Now you be honest.. You were totally checking me out when you saw me again.”

You let out a small scoff, “I maybe would have if I hadn’t been to busy trying to free myself from your grip since you thought I was stealing some chicken or something.”, Jinyoung let out a laugh at that memory. Even though it wasn’t long ago it felt like years, considering on how much your relationship developed since then. “Your turn. You would’ve gone home sooner but you were waiting to walk me home.”, the vibe Jinyoung gave you told you it was okay to dig a bit deeper.

“Now you’re just being overconfident, (y/n).”, he laughed and you thought about how his laugh is so different than his mum’s. His mum’s laugh was light and charming while his laugh was deep and full of joy.

“If you say I’m wrong you’re lying.”, you insisted while looking up to the beautiful night sky. You felt slightly cold but you didn’t really care, you could walk and talk for a few more hours without complaining.

“I never said you’re wrong.”, he said, now more soft and serious, “But don’t let it get to your head, I know my mum would kill me if she heard that you had to walk home alone.”

“You’re so in love with me dude, that’s gross.”, you said laughing, not able to stop nagging. By now it seemed like that was Jinyoung’s and your’s thing somehow.

“I really don’t know if I wanna shove you off this bridge or kiss you, (y/n).”, he said shamelessly, trying to sound annoyed but his mood was just as good as yours and the playful flirting was something he missed over the last years. It’s been too long since he met someone he liked so much that he didn’t have to care about what he said. Spending time with you made him feel careless. The night air and the sky that was full of stars just loosened up the mood even more.

Even though your heart was beating faster at his comment you tried to remain cool – he said it so casually as if the topic of kissing you was something completely normal to him, making you realize that maybe Jinyoung and you were indeed becoming something more than friends. “Oh, can I pick?”, you said playfully as you lightly swayed your hip into his.

“No.”, he said easily while pushing you towards the edge of the bridge you were currently walking on, making you gasp a bit, while trying to balance yourself so you wouldn’t fall over the low wooden railing. What was he doing? Just in the right moment, he held you, his arm around your waist, being a bit too close to you which was just once again showing you that the two of you were actually going into the direction you wanted to. As you looked at him your eyes were opened wide, the shock written all over your face.

Jinyoung still was holding you close, giving you the brightest smile ever, his expression full of joy, “Did you really think that I’d let you fall?”

“Yes!”, you said, a hundred percent sure that he’d actually do something like that, “If anyone in this town would then it would be you.”

He acted a bit offended, as he pulled your body a bit closer to his again, your intestines feeling all over the place. Half of your body was still bent over the bridge as Jinyoung’s hold was the only support that stopped you from falling right into the water. His face came near yours and at this moment you wanted nothing more than to feel his lips on yours.

“Well, if you think that lowly from me-”, he said before pausing his sentence, you could feel his breath tingling on your lips and see his eyes wandering down to look at your them - but then you started losing balance as Jinyoung let go of your body, making you fall right into the lake behind you. Of course, he’d do something like that.

As you came up again you were drenched. The water was at least still warm enough to not make you shiver while climbing up to the bridge again. Jinyoung was laughing wholeheartedly while holding a hand out for you so he could help you out. You immediately took his offer, taking a tight grip on his hand before getting your revenge – within seconds Jinyoung forcefully joined you in the water, still laughing and shaking his head.

“I should’ve seen that coming.”, he admitted, now also completely wet, shaking his head amused, “I deserved that.”

You now joined his laughter, no one of you seemed to want to get out of the water for now. “Remember the one time we were having a contest here about who can stay underwater the longest when we were children?”, you asked him amused, thinking back to older days, one of the few memories you had with him.

He immediately nodded while walking towards you, leaning against the bridge. His body was close to yours, his face facing yours, the wrinkles around his eyes still there while smiling. “I remember you and Bambam being afraid, thinking I fainted because I let my body swim on the surface with my head under the water still.”

You let out a laugh while playfully hitting his chest, “You were the worst, seriously! Why would you do this to me?”

His arm found your hip, resting lazily on it - you wondered if he’d also do that if he was completely sober. “To make good memories.”, he said, scrunching his nose a bit to look cute.

“Well, that’s also about our only memory because you always avoided me when we were younger.”, you stated, a bit salty.

His laughter sounded different this time, if you didn’t know better you’d almost say there was some kind of admiration in it. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”, he said, still laughing before looking at you once again - it’s like you completely forgot about being in the water now in the middle of the night. “Wanna know a secret?”, he asked, maybe even a bit shy.

“Always.”, you said as your eyes widened in excitement since you loved secrets.

“I avoided you because I had the biggest crush on you and Jaebum always said girls suck and if anyone of us kissed a girl they’d be kicked out of the gang.”, he said, laughing at the memory.

“Okay, but Jaebum was literally my first kiss.”, you answered, “I think he knew exactly why he told you that.”

Now it was Jinyoung who was in shock, not you. “You’re kidding me.”, he sounded offended, “I can’t believe he’d play me like this because of some chick.”

“Hello? I’m right here.”, you said, shaking your head amused.

“Oh, I bet you’d rather be where Jaebum is, huh?”, he spotted before breaking character and starting to laugh, “But seriously, he never even told me. He knew I’d fight him about it.”

“It must be hard to always be as dramatic as you are.”, you said laughing, as you got out of the water again, starting to shiver a bit, “Let’s go home, I’m cold.”

He got out of the water too and you tried hard not to stare at his chest that was completely showing through his white shirt. “You should have put on a jacket.”, he said, laughing.

“Oh, you asshole.”, you countered, “I’m only cold because you pushed me into the lake.”

He shrugged as the two of you were walking towards the entrance of the farm.

“I had fun tonight.”, you admitted to him as you were standing in front of your door once again, “You’re not awful.”

He let out a laugh, “Thank you?”, not sure how to understand that he continued, “You’re also not awful, (y/n).”

“I mean, you were not the nicest in the beginning, I thought you hated me. But now, I think you tolerate me.”

“Believe it or not, I think you’re pretty cool.”

You grinned, “I’ll let my diary know about that.”

He just stood there for a second, looking at you. Both of you didn’t want to part, enjoying time with each other but you didn’t want things to get awkward.

“I’m sorry I pushed you into the water.”, he said, laughing while apologizing.

You rolled your eyes at his half-assed apology, “Yeah sure. You better make up for that.”

He nodded, “I will. Good night, (y/n).”, suddenly you felt him hugging you, not expecting it once again. Three hugs in one day were something you didn’t expect at all.

“Sleep well.”, you said to him as you closed the door behind you, removing your make up, changing into comfortable clothes and letting yourself fall into your bed, falling asleep with a smile on your lips. You were definitely making progress.

A few days after It was about time to talk to someone about your confusing feelings. And of course, Jaebum was the first person that came to your mind. As the two of you were sitting outside on your porch, drinking a beer and enjoying the sunset slowly going down, you decided to tell him about what happened after you and Jinyoung left on your birthday.

“He gifted you your old music box?”, he asked confused, almost shocked, “That’s so much better than the vibrator we gifted you, dammit.”

You let out a laugh, “Anything is better than that, Jaebum.”

“Well, apparently you won’t be needing it any time soon if you and Jinyoung continue to fall in love at that pace.”

“Jaebum.”, you let out a pout, “I really don’t know what I should do. He was about to kiss me by the lake but instead, he let me fall into the water.”

Your best friend was trying his hardest to contain his laughter as you told the story but he couldn’t help it, “You really think he’s the one you want? I bet not even Yugyeom would behave that awkward.”

Chuckling, you shrugged, “I guess I just like a challenge.”

Jaebum nodded, “He definitely is one. Bare with him, it’s been some time. His last girlfriend and him broke up quite some time ago.”

Suddenly, you felt curiosity awakening inside of you, “How was she?”

Taking a sip of his beer, he looked at you, a bit pitiful, “Are you sure you wanna do this to yourself?”

“I’m just curious.”, you assured him.

Before Jaebum could start telling you about her you were disturbed by your cousin, who just finished his work, a beer in his hand, sitting down on the free chair on your garden table. “What are you talking about?”

“My hopeless crush.”, you said, laughing.

“What else.”, he said unimpressed, “You could still date Yugyeom, you know.”

You shook your head before turning back to Jaebum, “So, tell me about her, I can’t imagine him with a girl at all.”

“Are we talking about Elly?”, Bambam asked confused, trying to catch up.

“Yes.”, Jaebum said, trying to start once again before getting interrupted by Bambam, also once again. “She wasn’t shit, (y/n). Don’t worry about her. I never liked her. They weren’t even really a couple.”

Jaebum rolled his eyes, “She wasn’t all bad, Bam. She was actually quite nice at the beginning. She’s from the town next to ours, the granddaughter of the owner of the library - we were friends with her back then when she still visited every weekend. She was into Jinyoung from the first second and he was, well, frustrated. So they became friends with benefits. Nothing too serious at first.”

“(Y/n), I really don’t get why you’d wanna know. You’ll just hurt yourself.”, your cousin said, clearly disagreeing with your curiosity.

“They broke up so I won’t be hurt, I just can’t imagine him in a relationship at all. I need some information.”, you argued.

“He was a good boyfriend, I guess.”, Bambam said, taking a big gulp of his beer, “Like he visited her often and made sure to bring her to every event or birthday. But one of them would always start a fight and it got so annoying over time. Every time he brought her I was afraid to say anything to him because if I only said one wrong word she’d start to discuss with him.”

Jaebum now interrupted him, “Well, it wasn’t only her to start a fight, to be fair. Jinyoung often enough started one too, whenever he was in a bad mood he’d always find a reason to fight.”

A scoff came out of your mouth, “I already thought he’d be one to pick fights, to be honest.”

“Speaking of the devil.”, Jaebum nodded towards the house of the Park’s and as you turned around you saw Jinyoung jogging over to you. He looked happy, a smile on his lips, something rather unusual.

“Why are you having a nice evening and no one cared to call me?”, he asked as he arrived in front of you, holding up a big plate with many different pieces of cakes on it, “I brought cake.”

Bambam immediately took the plate and set it in front of him as Jinyoung sat down on the free seat on the bench beside you.

“We were just talking shit about you.”, Bambam said, getting up to get some forks from inside.

“Why? What did I do?”, he asked, already sounding offended, ready to defend himself without knowing what even seemed to be the problem.

“I just told them about how you let me fall into the lake.”, you said, salty, playing a bit hard to get like so often.

“Why would you do that?”, he asked in a whiny tone, “Aren’t they teasing us enough already?”

You scoffed, “I don’t care about that. I still can’t believe you’ve done that. I could’ve caught a cold.”

He now started to act offended, “You didn’t though, right? I brought you cake as an apology, just to find you hanging out with our friends, without me?”

Jaebum let out a laugh at your constant bickering, “Young love must be so nice.”

“Shut up.”, you looked over to Jaebum, giving him a warning glance before you turned back to the real enemy here, “You think cake can just fix the trust I lost in you?”

He let out a laugh, “You’re being overdramatic.”

You knew you were and you weren’t even serious about the whole discussion, you couldn’t care less that he let you fall into the lake. It was just fun to annoy the living shit out of him, “You’re being an asshole.”

He scoffed before continuing your discussion in a mocking voice, “Wanted me to kiss you so bad that you can’t get over the fact that I didn’t?”

You let out a small gasp, not expecting his comeback. Jaebum and Bambam were both giggling like little boys, watching the two of you fight.

“If you think that, you’re truly delusional.”, you said, scoffing, even though everyone here knew he was right, “The only reason I didn’t kill you right then was that I was so relieved you didn’t kiss me.”

He snorted, not ready to give up yet, “Sure, just keep on telling it to yourself until you start to believe it.”

And this is how you spent the rest of the evening. Three of your closest friends, cake, one or two or maybe even more beers, a beautiful pink sunset and most important - in the place you loved to call your home.

[fireflysinmystomach]

How to break a Mind - Chapter 2 “Tricked”

Summary: There is something new in Thomas’ Mind and it want’s to come out and play.

Warnings: Blood, slight gore, fear.

Please note that this story has chapters that are a little bit more graphic. This is one of them. Tell me if you need anything tagged.

—

Thomas had been slacking off for a few days now. He lost all of his motivation at once. He was eating cereal straight out of the box and ordered three pizzas for himself yesterday, because he wasn’t able to decide what kind he wanted to have. He wasn’t feeling like showering or  working or, well doing anything at all.

He has had one of those episodes once before, but it didn’t last as long as now. Not knowing, but also not caring why he was feeling this way, no steps were taken to change anything.

Just as he walked past a wall  decorated with pictures in colourful frames, one particular photograph caught his attention. His boyfriend of two years and himself were lying on a picnic blanket and they looked with bright smiles back at Thomas. It was the day of their third date and he remembered being hopelessly in love back then.

When was the last time he felt like this? He couldn’t remember. It has been… rough for them lately. The realization  hit him with full force. Suddenly he could feel his heart pound against his ribcage and he gasped at the almost physical pain that returned to him all at the same time.

His boyfriend had not came over, called or even texted him in the last three days. Thomas was supposed to go over to his house last Saturday but he forgot due to his episode. He had not canceled it. If something like this would have happened to Thomas with one of his friends, he would have been worried out of his mind. Didn’t his lover fear that something happened to him? Did he cared at all about Thomas? Or was he glad that he had a break from him for a while?

He must have been really annoying lately. Thinking back to all the times, he had tried to talk seriously about their relationship and the problems they had been having, Thomas remembered how he was met with harsh dismissal.

A quiet sob escaped his lips and he had to sit down on the floor. He took out his phone and checked their text conversations.  It was almost always Thomas himself who texted first, who asked for dates or who wished him a good night. The replies were often short and took up to a few hours.

Tears were streaming down his face now. This wasn’t good.

He didn’t love Thomas anymore.

 —

 Logan just stared. He couldn’t look away even though it hurt. Oh God it hurt so much. In this moment he felt the most intense feeling he ever had. He wasn’t even aware that he was able to form this kind of emotion. But there he was. Only faintly acknowledging Patton’s screaming.

It was just all too much to process for him right now. “How…?” he whispered, for once left completely without any explanation for the situation.

Virgil was back.

He was hanging from the ceiling, his arms spread and head hanging back so that they could not see his face but it left his throat on display.  

It was slashed. That seemed to be the source for the blood dripping down his body and soaking through the carpet.

And if that would have been all there was to it, Logan might have even been able to still function. But no. The longer he looked, the more gut wrenching details sprung to his attention.

The deep cuts along his wrists, the claw marks in his chest and the burns along his collarbone.

Who… no, WHAT did that to him? And how could one of them even die? How was all of this possible? It could not… it could simply not be possible!

Roman seemed to have a similar thought because he just mumbled the same phrase over and over again. “This is not real. It’s not. It can’t be. Just fiction. This is… not real.”

The Prince reached out with a trembling hand and slowly closed the door, for which Logan was so thankful for. He knew, deep inside, it would not solve their problem but at least he wouldn’t have to look at it anymore. At what was left of their Friend.

“Roman…”

“No.”

“Roman, we have to- “

“NO! I refuse to believe this! This is just a nightmare, purely fictional! Nothing more than that. It can’t be real…”   He grabbed the door handle again and forced the door open again. Logan closed his eyes because he simply could not stand this sight anymore.

“what… Virge? VIRGIL! Oh God”

Logan could hear the other side run the few step distance and fall to his knees. Then silence. He still did not dare to open his eyes but then…

“He is… Logan I think he’s still breathing! You have to help me Logan!”

The logical side did not move. He didn’t open his eyes and he didn’t even breath for a few moments.

“Logan I swear to God! Get over here and help me! It was a trick, he’s alive. Do you hear me? Virgil is alive!”

His eyes snapped open and finally he saw it for himself. The anxious side was slumped on the floor in front of his bed. His Jacket still neatly wrapped around his body, the hood covering his head which had fallen onto his chest.

The blood was gone, the carpet clean. No trace of the former picture was left in their reality.

Logan somehow managed to step forward and sink down next to the unconscious side. He had to push Roman aside because he had started to frantically shake Virgil and scream at him to wake up.

He quickly checked his vital signs and ran his hands over Virgil’s skinny jeans covered legs. As he could not feel any sticky moisture that might have indicated a larger wound, he continued to unzip the trademark hoodie.

“Mhh…s-stopp…” Virgil still had his eyes closed but his lips definitely moved just now.

Roman let out a choked sob and cupped the younger Man���s face in his hands.

“Virgil oh my stars you are alive! Look at me, buddy. Please Virge open your eyes and tell me that you are fine, please…”

Logan glared at him. “Would you please let me finish examining him? We need to find out if he is severely wounded somewhere. Virgil can you tell me where it hurts the most?”

“M-My head…”  his words slurred and were barely understandable but Logan nodded. He swiftly pulled the Hood down and turned Virgil’s head carefully. He could not find any wounds other than a slight bump at the back of his head, which was too small as to cause any concussions.

Logan let himself take a long, much needed breath to steady his hands and get his thoughts in order.

“I believe his health condition is not alarming he is just a little roughed up. Well, maybe more than a little but he should be okay for now. Help me lift him up so we can place him in his bed.”

Roman got to his feet immediately. They grabbed him under his arms and placed him carefully onto the black and grey blankets.

Virgil only muttered slightly but did not move.

“Roman, you need to stay here for now, alright? I have to take care of Patton now. He might have suffered a shock reaction of some sorts and that is potentially dangerous. But you have to try and wake Virgil up, be gentle though. Refrain from touching him and just talk, try to figure out as much as possible about his current physical state and when he is ready to stand up again, call out for me immediately. Do not leave him unattended, do you understand?”

The Prince looked overwhelmed but nodded nonetheless. He sank to his knees and began to talk softly, trying to get a reaction from his friend laying before him.

Logan sighed again heavily and turned away. It was hard for him to just leave but there was nothing left to do regarding the anxious side and he had more important things to attend now, than to just stand and think about the image that, without a doubt, will haunt him from now on.

Patton was still laying on the floor, his hands clutching at his own hair and little sobs and whimpers continued to escape his mouth. He needed some rest before he was able to comprehend the situation again, Logan decided.

He struggled a little to lift him from the ground, especially because the emotional side was not at all cooperating but after a while he managed to bring him into his room and lay down with him.

He knew by now how to comfort people, he had seen it enough times with Patton. He still didn’t know what to say though. Logical reasoning didn’t appear to be the way to go but in this moment, it wasn’t important what he said as long as he was there with him. Logan tried to go through the motions he had learned in a repetitive fashion, stroking Patton’s hair and mumbling sweet nothings into his ear until he could feel him slip into a quiet slumber.

[babyshawwn]

Anchor

MASTERLIST

A/N: Been working on this for a while, actually convinced myself not to post it, so I might delete it again, haha. Feedback is always lovely.

Word count: 3,614

Anchor (sexual + trigger warning)

His hands were running down your body, rubbing your tights with his long fingers, leaving your skin burning behind as he always accomplished to do.

Shawn’s tongue slipped out of your mouth and he bit your lip roughly instead, knowing you liked when he did that. It let a small whimper escape your trembling lips.

The heat was raising in your cheeks and by your fingers wrapped into Shawn’s thick, messy hair, you would tell he was burning up as well.

Shawn pressed himself further down against your body, which forced your back further down the soft mattress.

His bugle pressed against your lower stomach, so while Shawn’s tongue was teasing your neck, leaving sore marks behind, your hand slipped down between his legs and rubbed his length against the fabric from his jeans.

If it was even possible, you felt him become even harder than he was before. Your touches on him forced Shawn to moan loudly against the skin on your neck, before licking you once again.

Your hand slipped into his jeans, Shawn being surprised by your greedily touches, swayed his back in please not able to keep his body still.

You were about to undo his belt, when his phone buzzed on your bedside table.

“I gotta take this, it might be Andrew about some tour stuff” Shawn gasped between still placing lusting kisses on your lips.

“Sure” you whispered back, but he managed to plant a couple more, before finally pulling back.

He grabbed the phone, pressing play and raising it to his ear, sitting up in the bed. You watched him as he spoke.

His voice was still gasping for air and his cheeks were burning up. That messy yet fluffy hair made him look all cuddly, but you’d always liked that look on him.

“Sure, just let me know” Shawn replied, before hanging up the phone again.

“Everything alright?” you asked, sending him a tender smile.

Shawn let his fingers run through his steamy hair, clearly feeling the warmth, before nodding your way.

“Just tour planning” he muttered back at you.

“It stresses you out” you said, more as a statement than a question. He shrugged his shoulders, taking a large breath.

“You’re a good outlet to that” he joked, raising an eyebrow at you.

You stuck your tongue out, before rolling your eyes at him, which just made him giggle his usual childish way at you.

You loved when the childish side of Shawn came out, it suited him, to not have a care in the world that second he laughed like this.

“So…” he dared you, grapping around your ankle.

Shawn licked his lips slowly, obviously playing around with you, but the butterflies still reached the surface in your stomach.

“Where were we?” you shook your head at him, letting out a slight laugh.

“It’s getting late” you pointed out, still gasping desperately for air.

You let your fingertip run across your swollen lips, still feeling them being wet from Shawn’s tongue playing with them and his teeth digging into your lips.

“Yeah, so?” Shawn shrugged, sending you a wide yet cheeky smile.

His cheeks were heavily flushed and his hair was messy, though it somehow just made him seem more attractive to you.

Messy Shawn was your favourite Shawn.

It reminded you that even people as perfect as him, was still a bit of a mess sometimes.

He licked his quivering lips, also trying to regain somewhat control over his still forced breathing. You laughed at his words, before rolling your eyes and lightly shaking your head.

“So you should probably be getting home” you said, sending him a smile.

Shawn crawled up the bed, until he made it in between your legs and his dark, wanting eyes, rested themselves on you.

“So when are you actually going to let me stay the night?” he asked you, letting his eyes stay glued onto you.

You felt the heat raise in your cheeks and the uncomfortableness spread around your veins.

You hated this question, but lately, Shawn had been asking it a lot.

Your hand reached down and touched his face gently, before your fingertip played a little with a single curl, sticking to his damp forehead.

“Soon” you promised, but Shawn knew it was a lie.

“But why? It’s not like we haven’t had sex or anything, why won’t you let me spend the night?”

“Because…” you started, before wrapping your fingers into his hair.

“Sleeping with someone is just that much more intimate”

“And what? You don’t want to have that with me?” he asked you, honestly.

The strength in his voice died over at the end and his sadness cut so deep into your already heavy heart.

Oh Shawn, if you only knew.

You wanted that more than anything in the entire world and he didn’t even know it. But there were sides of you, Shawn hadn’t seen.

Sides that came out late at night. Sides that he didn’t know about, sides you weren’t ready to revile just yet, because if you did, he would be out your door in a heartbeat.

“I want that-“

“But not with me?”

“I only want that with you, Shawn. I promise you” even you could hear, how desperate your voice sounded, but to be fair, he was pushing you to the edge.

He didn’t mean to, he didn’t know he was pushing, but he was.

Shawn’s fingers ran up your thighs, before he found your hands and intertwined your fingers together.

He planted four quick but gently kisses on your cold fingers. His warm lips left your skin burning only seconds after they left.

“Then help me out here, because I don’t understand” he sighted, almost begging.

It hurt him, you could easily tell. And it hurt you that you were hurting him, because all you were trying to do, was to shelter him.

Something in his eyes broke, when your tongue tied and no words slipped out of your mouth. Shawn pushed himself up and jumped out of your bed.

He didn’t look at you once while grabbing his coat and his keys from your bedside table, sticking his phone in his pocket.

You felt the tears reaching the surface, but you didn’t let yourself cry. That was one thing you’d learned from all of this, how to suffocate your tears.

“I’ll talk to you later” Shawn mumbled, not even glancing back at you. Your heart sank and suddenly, you panicked.

Shawn was your anchor, he may not have known it, but he was.

You hurried out the bed and grabbed around Shawn’s wrist. How you were even strong enough to hold him back, you had no idea, but you did succeed to turn him around.

“What?” he sighted, titling his head.

His eyes were sort of tried now, but that’s all they gave you, the rest of his stare was empty. Your free hand slipped to his cheek, before your thumb gently rubbed it. Your eyes were sticking on each other and Shawn’s hurt cut through to you.

In this moment, you realized you needed to give him something. Something he could hold onto. He would give up on you, if you didn’t reach out your hand with an offering.

“You’re right” you breathed, biting into your lip hard enough to leave a mark behind.

Your mind was screaming at you to stay quiet, but your heart finally gave in.

“Stay” you whispered raspy. Shawn shrug out of your grip, rubbing his eyes shortly.

“What?”

“Stay with me. Spend the night”

“y/n, you obviously don’t want me too”

“But I do, I want to sleep with you. Have you in my bed and hold me throughout the night, please” you begged him, feeling the lump forming in your throat.

Why were you even doing this?

It would end badly and you knew it. Shawn’s eyes narrowed you down as his long fingers ran through your hair. He bended down and kissed your forehead tenderly.

“If you’re not ready… I just don’t know what’s holding you back. If I did something-“

“You didn’t Shawn, I want this. Please” you grabbed around his fingers and slowly trying to take the car keys out of his hands. He fought you at first, but then he gave in.

“Please” you repeated, licking your dry lips.

“Do you really want me to?”

“Yes, please Shawn” your fingers wrapped around his and you pushed him away from your front door.

Your heart was racing so fast it hurt your chest, but you didn’t care about it. You cared about Shawn. He had suffered under your mental health, he tried denying it, but he had.

And this, this was a major step for you. Usually, you tried keeping those two things apart. Shawn and your depression. You didn’t want them to cross paths, so maybe that’s why your heart was aching right now, knowing that they would.

Your demons came out at night. Your nightmares forced them out. You had less control, less sanity. And Shawn was going to see that now and when he did, he’d leave you behind.

At least you feared that and honestly, you wouldn’t blame him if he did. But if you didn’t give into this, Shawn would have left anyways.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Shawn asked you, letting his fingertip run down your arm. You sent him a careful smile, before shaking your head at him.

“Nothing. Let’s brush our teeth” you grabbed his hand and pulled him with you to your bathroom.

You found a toothbrush that hadn’t been used and handed it to him, before grapping your own. You caught Shawn’s massive smug in the mirror, before he raised his eyebrow at you.

“What? I like to be prepared” you defended yourself, putting the toothbrush in your mouth.

“You’re so weird” he laughed, before planting a kiss on the top of your hair.

Though Shawn was standing behind you, he was tall enough for his head to peak up in the mirror as well.

He let his chin rest on the top of your head, while the both of you brushed your teeth together.

This was rather intimate for you as well, you never really brushed your teeth with anyone, but you liked it a lot better when Shawn was here as well.

“So does it get its own place or is this a one-time thing?” Shawn teased, rolling the toothbrush between his fingers. You rolled your eyes at him, but it only made him laugh.

“Just put it in the cup, dork” you said, putting yours down as well.

“As you wish” he said, before leaning in planting a kiss on your lips.

“Mhh, I love it when you taste like mint” he whispered, removing a tot of hair from your face and put it behind your ear.

You pushed his forehead, playfully, away from you, but it didn’t stop Shawn from smiling massively at you.

“Are you just going to stand there and look at me while I get ready for bed?” you said, gazing over at him. Shawn leaned his back towards the wall, before nodding at you.

“I don’t know if I ever get to experience this again, so I better get the full experience this time”

“You’re so creepy” you joked, but nothing wiped that smile off his face.

Really, you wanted him to leave but realized he wasn’t going to.

You turned on the water and filled a glass with water, before grapping the orange jar from the drawer underneath the sink.

You poured two of mint green pills out in your palm and put back the jar again. Suddenly, Shawn was standing beside you, watching you carefully.

“What are those for?” he asked you. His voice was careful but genuine.

You couldn’t get yourself to face him while swallowing the lump in your throat. Shawn’s thumb pushed up your chin, forcing him to look at you.

“I have trouble sleeping” you admitted, biting your lip.

“The depression makes that hard for you?” he asked, gazing down at you.

“No, the anxiety does” you whispered sorely.

You hoped your words wouldn’t be loud enough for him to hear them, but the way his eyes changed assured you he did. His fingers stroked your cheeks lovingly, as you breathed heavily.

“Why?” he asked you. You closed your eyes, biting the inside of your cheek.

“It gives me nightmares”

“What are they about?”

“I rarely remember, my doctor always says it’s all my inner demons” you stuttered your way through the entire sentence.

It was more than you’d ever told him, more than you really wanted him to know, but you didn’t feel like lying about this. Not when you lied about so many other things.

“Well, I’m going to keep you safe tonight” he whispered tenderly to you, before sending you a tiny smile.

You nodded back at his words, feeling your entire body shiver. Shawn leaned down, before he closed the tiny gap between your lips. Shawn’s kiss always took away your air, he stole it from you every time he kissed you.

“Let’s get some sleep, eh?” Shawn asked you, letting his fingertip touch your nose tip.

You wrapped your fingers around his hands and pulled him back into your room. Shawn undressed and jumped into your bed, you followed right behind.

Shawn grabbed gently around your arm and pulled you close to him. His arms wrapped around your body and your back was resting against Shawn’s chest.

You felt his heart beat against his chest, but it just made you smile a little. You liked to believe that sometimes, his heart beaded for you, because yours truly always beaded for him.

It didn’t take long until Shawn’s breathing became heavier and you could tell he drifted into his sleep. Little noises slipped out of his mouth, but they actually made you feel comfortable.

Maybe you’d get through this night, maybe because Shawn was here. You closed your eyes and to your own surprised, your body seemed to give in rather quickly too.

You woke up covered in sweat. Your back was sticking to the sheets, your hair was sticking to your damp neck.

Your heart was racing. It was ringing in your ears. The room seemed to spin. The lump in your throat made you feel sick.

Your lungs were empty for air, almost leaving you suffocating behind. Your entire body was shaking, shaking so much you felt sore and drained.

Shawn’s strong arms were stilled wrapped around your body, but being close to someone right now, was not an option for you.

Especially Shawn, you couldn’t let him see you like this.

You softly and silently pushed him off you, trying your best not to wake him up. But luckily for you, he seemed like a heavy sleeper.

You sat up, feeling your heart beat fast and in an uneven rhythm. It was only now, you felt your silent sobbing.

The tears were streaming down your cheeks, but no noise escaped your quivering lips. Every fibre of your body hurt and every inch of your skin were burning you up.

The more you tried breathing normally, the more difficult it became to actually forced air down your lungs.

You stumbled out of bed, almost running out to the bathroom. Once again, you didn’t know what happened or why you freaked out, but your entire body gave into the anxiety, eating you up from the inside.

It made you feel toxic. Toxic to yourself, toxic to anyone else. You took them down with you.

You collapsed down crying on the cold bathroom floor, disappearing into your viscous sobbing. It was the same every night, it had been like this for years.

“Baby” a worried voice suddenly whispered into the darkness. You didn’t need to look up, you knew you’d meet Shawn’s gaze.

“Just leave, Shawn”

“What? No!” he panicked, dropping down next to you on the floor.

He reached out for you, but you pushed him off. You didn’t want him to see this, he couldn’t see this.

“Let me hold you!” he begged you, but you shook your head.

“I’m fine” you mumbled, almost choking in your tears.

Shawn once again reached out for you, but before you could push him off, he spoke again.

“Don’t fight me on this. Let me hold you” this time, he raised his voice at you.

Shawn grabbed around you and pulled you up on his lap and hugged you into his bare chest. His hands were stroking your back, rocking you back and forth in his lap.

Shawn was holding you like a baby, caressing your back, his fingers disappearing into your hair.

“Breathe for me, baby. Just one breath” he whispered, trying to calm you down.

“You’re okay, you’re doing okay. Just breathe” he continued, embracing you even tighter into him.

Somehow, almost miraculously, his words and his touches actually seemed to calm you down.

“I didn’t realize it was this bad” he said, while rocking you in his arms. His voice sounded sore and scared.

“I didn’t want you to see, I didn’t want…” you didn’t even have enough energy to finish your sentence.

“I didn’t want you to see just how crazy I am” you cried into his chest.

You knew this was the end, Shawn would be out of here as soon as he could. You’d always been told, you were too much work for anyone to stick around.

“Hey babe, we’re all a little crazy” he said, honestly.

“You’re crazy for even being here” you screamed back at him.

You regretted it right away, but you couldn’t control it. You could never control it.

Shawn lifted up your chin with his thumb, for the first time forcing you to look at him. His face was pale, his forehead had deep, worried wrinkles and his lips were completely out of colour. He tried smiling at you, but the smile didn’t reach his gloomy eyes.

“Well, then let me be a fool for you, but I’m not going anywhere. This, right here, this doesn’t scare me off. It doesn’t scare me now and I won’t ever scare me off”

“You can’t promise me that” you sobbed silently, biting your wet lip.

Shawn wiped away tears streaming down your face, but new once replaced them seconds after. He gazed at you for a second, but his eyes told you, something inside him was in suffering as well.

“I can, I can promise you that. Because underneath all this darkness you think you have? I see you. I see the light inside you, the light that’s trying so hard to be seen. It’s there, I know you don’t believe it, but y/n, it’s there” Shawn said, not removing his gaze from you.

You watched as Shawn started tearing up, struggling not to give in to crying as well. You shook your head at him, not believe his words.

“You show me little glimpses of it all the time. When you’re singing the shower, or humming while making breakfast, or smiling when you’re reading your favourite books, or the way your eyes are shining when you watch me perform. I know it’s there, because I’ve noticed a little bit shining through the cracks. It’s there, it’s right under the surface. You are not a lost cost”

“But what if I am?” your words broke his heart and this time, Shawn wasn’t strong enough to fight the tears. He breathed heavily, shaking his head at you.

“You are not. I won’t let you. I won’t let you stop fighting this” Shawn voice sounded so desperate and petite. You’d never heard it like this before.

“But it hurts… It hurts so much and I’m all alone” once again, you broke down.

Shawn held you close to his chest, once again rocking you in his strong arms, kissing the top of your hair.

“Not anymore. You don’t have to fight alone anymore. I’m here, okay? I won’t let you fight on your own anyone” his sobbing voice cracked over at the end, but he was honest. You could tell he was being honest with you from the desperation in his tone.

“I want all the strings attached. I don’t just want to be here when things are good, I want to be the one on the floor with you at 4 am, when you’re crying your heart out. I want to be your person, for better and for worse”

“I don’t want to drag you down. I always drag people down”

“I don’t care. You also raise me up. You support me and you love me and you never let me give up. So I’m not letting you give up either.”

You wanted to believe his words, you wanted to trust him. And maybe it was because of your fragile state at the moment, but Shawn truly loved you.

Even lying here, on the bathroom floor at 4 am, sobbing your heart out and being at your worst, he still chose to love you.

God knows why, you really didn’t, but he did. He chose to stay and fight for you, fight with you. And maybe you’re a little crazy, but you also believed that this might be love. Like the real deal.  

“You don’t have to do this on your own, let me be your anchor” he begged you and those simple words made you give in.

You chose to believe someone’s words. You chose to let them see this deep into your soul. For the first time in your entire life.

[babyshawwn]

Moans

MASTERLIST

Request: Hey ! Im sorry this one is too smutty but... Okay, can you please make an imagine where, the reader and Shawn fall asleep and in the morning or middle of the night idk, he heard some moans and realise the reader is grinding on him while sleeping and he watch her and don't want to wake her up yet ( cuz he is turned on ) and like after that you can do what you want 😂 OMGG I FEEL SO BAD I FEEL LIKE A PERVERT NO 😭 But yeah like.. if you could please do one 😂 I love all your imagines ! 💋 thanks !

Word count: 1,501

A/N: I tried, but this was hard. 

Moans (Kind of a smut)

“Hey baby” I whispered, as I silently walked into the bedroom.

“Are you awake?” I wasn’t quite sure if she was sleeping or not.

“Mmh” She grunted at my voice.

Okay, so half asleep. I laughed slightly at the sleepy noises escaping her mouth, while kicking my shoes off. She turned around in the bed, rubbing her drowsy eyes, looking up at me.

“How was the show?” y/n asked me, sending me a little smile.

I dropped down next to her in the bed, planting a kiss gentle kiss on the top of her messy hair. She smiled warmly back at me.

“Good, really loud”

“They’re always really loud, Shawn” She joked back, still half asleep.

“That’s true” I admitted, leaning back in the bed.

I let my fingers brush against y/n’s skin, feeling the heat in her cheeks. I loved her like this, completely pure and somehow emotionally naked.

Her hair was messy, her eyes dark and tired, her lips pink but a little dry. This would always be my favourite side of her. Lying in my bed, sleepy, tired and unravelling her flaws.  

“You smell good” She whispered at me.

“I took a shower after the show”

“I wanted to take a shower with you” She whined at me, making me smile widely.

“Sorry babe, next time”

“Now” She mumbled, but she was almost pulled back to sleep already.

I leaned down, kissing her burning lips mildly. I removed a tot of her hairs behind her ear, before caressing her earlobe. Oh, how I loved this one.

“You’re too tired tonight” I whispered, stroking her whimpering lip.

“But I want you”

“But you’re exhausted, love. You need some rest” I told her, finding her cold hand.

Y/N had joined me on tour about a month ago and it really seemed to drain her out. I get it though, when you aren’t used to it, traveling all over the world can be exhausting as hell. I was barely able to wake her up after the flight here, so I knew, she needed to sleep.

I wanted her to relax, allow her body to rest and regain strength. That’s also why I told her, to stay at the hotel tonight.

“Cuddle me then?” y/n muttered, reaching out for me. I laughed a little by her words, smiling widely.

I loved how she never got enough of me, like even if I’d just been gone a couple of hours, she had missed me deeply. She always craved more of me.

I covered my own body with the sheets, sliding down to her. She curled up beside me, wrapping her arms around me, while placing her head on my chest.

I cuddled her even further into me, placing small kisses on her hair. I couldn’t help but smile, as I continued to stroke her back.  

“I’m glad you back again, Shawn” She whispered, sending me a wide smile. I stroked her nose with my, kissing it quickly.

“Me too, baby. Me too” I whispered into her hair, smelling of that coconut shampoo she loved so much.

“Get some rest baby, you’re so tired” I worried about her, she nodded into my chest.

These moments - that we didn’t get to have so often - confirmed me over and over again, that home didn’t necessarily have to be four walls in a house, it could be two eyes and a beading heart as well. She felt like home to me.

I pulled y/n even closer to me, continuing to stroke her arm with my fingertips, kiss her shoulder and hug her tightly, until she dosed off in her sleep, finally relaxing for the first time in weeks.

I couldn’t fall asleep myself, because lying here, with her in my arms, while watching her sleep so peacefully, it made me happy. I could watch her all night and never get tired of it. I guess, that’s how much I love her.

I was pulled out of my sleep, when a few weird noises echoed in the hotel room. I turned around in the bed, still with y/n wrapped around me.

My body felt heavy, my eyes sore and I wasn’t quite sure if I was actually awake or not. I licked my lips, rubbing my eyes.

The more I woke up, the more the noises cut through to my ears. Did it sound like little… moans? Regaining most of my senses, I pushed myself up with my elbows, looking beside me. I couldn’t stop the smirk, that crossed my lips.

Y/N was sort of grinding against me in her sleep, letting little moans escape her trembling lips. Her cheeks were red and damp, her skin burning and steamy.

I would have killed to know, what she was dreaming about in this exact moment. I kinda hoped it was me, because the way she was grinding and those little whimpers from her lips; they belonged only to me.

Her legs were wrapped around my stomach, as she rubbed her lower body against mine in her heavy sleep.

The more I recovered from my sleep, the warmer I seemed to get. Having her move against my cold skin, touching me and sobbing silently, turned me on as hell.

I bit my lip, watching her lips quivering softly. I reached out to touch her face, letting my thumb slide down her lips, softly splitting them apart.

She breathed out against my finger, moaning once again. Holy fuck. The heat rushed to my cheeks, burning me up from the inside.

I felt my muscles become tense and my body craving her more than ever. Softly, I ran my hand down her back, leaving little chills on her skin. Biting my lip, I watched her move slowly against my bare skin.

How could she be so fucking hot while sleeping? I mean, she was giving me the biggest boner ever and she wasn’t even awake? Control yourself, Shawn.

Her hair had become damp and was sticking to her steamy neck, I had to fight the urge to bend down and kissed her neck roughly.

“Mhh, Shawn” y/n whimpered in her sleep.

It made a smug appear on my face rather quickly. So she was dreaming about me. Lying here, watching her like this, made me want to do so many things to her.

I felt myself getting hard, not being able to resists this for much longer. She’d had some sleep, a little midnight sex wouldn’t be too exhausting, would it? I let my hand stroke her cheek gently, turning her head to me.

“Baby?” I whispered softly.

“Mmh” She groaned back at me. I leaned down, planting a wet kiss on her burning lips. She immediately met my lips and kissed me back.

“Baby girl” I whispered into her wobbly lips. When I pulled back, her eyes were wide open.

“Shawn?” She stuttered, confused. She rubbed her eyes, looking around the dark room.

“I just had the best dream ever” She mumbled, smiling up at me.

“I bet you did” I smirked back at her.

She caught on to my smug, raising her eyebrow at me. She looked down at our bodies completely entangled with each other, letting her eyes reach my boner. She bit her lip, taking in a deep breath.

“Did I?” She stuttered, embarrassed.

“Rub against me? Yes. And you moaned my name in your sleep too” I teased her, watching her cheeks, if possible, turn even redder. She covered her face to hide from me, but it only made me laugh at her.

“That’s so embarrassing” She whined, covering herself into my chest.

“I think it’s fucking hot” I whispered back to her. She removed her hands, letting her eyes dart up to me.

“Really?” She rasped, gazing at me.

Her eyes were wide and dark and her lips were literally calling for my lips. I leaned down, closing the gap between our lips. She grabbed around my neck, pulling me further down to her.

I let my hands run down her body, leaving her skin quivering by my touch. I loved the power, I had over her when it came to this, I loved that touching her these places, could make her so weak.

“You were so fucking sexy and you didn’t even try” I whispered between kisses on her soft lips.

“Actually, I did try, when you got home. You just wouldn’t let me” She mocked me, rolling her eyes.

“Oh baby, I’ll let you now” I dared her, raising my eyebrow. Her smile grew and she tilted my head back with her thumb, starting to kiss me neck.

“Oh, game on, Mendes” She whispered against my skin.

“So how about that shower?” I said, biting her under lip. A little rasped slipped out of her lips. She got out of bed, leaving me behind.

“Well, are you coming?” She said, holding out her hand for me. I took her hand and she pulled me towards the bathroom.