#Maybe I’ll draw something happy later lol

[tinyperson00]

total time: 4 hours, 50 minutes

If this gets at least 150 likes, I’ll draw a comic/animation of Chuuya finding Dazai and rescuing him :3

sooo- yea;-; Dazai is having a great time! Honestly I feel like this doesn’t look amazing, but if you hold it up from afar it looks decent •v•

no, I will never stop torturing Dazai like this.

tagging: @kimetsu-chan @zenitsustherapist @exymybeloved @saffron0v0 @a-stray-wretched-dog

@ray-aero

speed paint:

[nyctocounterfeit]

Sonic Prime

Omfg I think I am done with this drawing, it was a lot of stress. I did a lot of stupid small mistakes and should of planned the sketching part a bit more. My initial plan was the have all of them in original persona with shards reflecting their shatterverse persona but it looked awkward so I instead did the complicated approach and drew them three times which took a ton of work because i also change their pose for each shatterverse otherwise it would look weird and lazy. However eventhough this work gave me a ton of headache and frustration I would say, it could be a lot worse and am happy with the final result. Did I make some mistakes yeah I’m pretty sure I did and can edit it later. I’m ok with that lol. It was hard to find references at the time, so if I made a mistake, I’ll come back to it. I just want to draw something else in the mean time. Maybe more sonic sketches or kingdom hearts or maybe a collab because I’m thinking of the sonic 2022 and Kh 20 anniversary, this year was soooo crazy.

but what about sonic prime, is it a good show? A bad show? I think you guys have your answer right here. I would say honestly this has to be the best sonic show I’ve watched. I did watched, sonic x, underground, sat am and some of boom. But I really liked the characters here, they were fun and had an interesting approach to each of their shatterverse persona. but I love the smear animation approach because not only could they get away with using less frames, it make it very dynamic, actioning and fun also a nice reference to how sonic was design based on the rubber hose era. I even bought a sonic 25 anniversary book this year and it’s a fun read. But yes, enough of the chit chat, I’m happy with this drawing at the end, I hope you guys enjoy it.

[slvtforfiction]

Hi I think your request are open. 😭

Anyways I have a prompt where it’s like Jonnie meets a fan and like later on he kind stalks her media and accidentally likes something for an old emo phase and she dms him “??” And it just spirals from there into something cute?

An old phase,A new like

☆ Yesss!

☆ Love this,thank you anon x

☆ Sorry it’s so short

☆ Johnnie Guilbert X Reader

☆ Fluff

☆ If you are going to request: please check at the pinned post if requests are open,otherwise I will delete your requests which I have already been doing

☆ Creds to @cafekitsune for dividers :)

Masterlist | Pinned post

“So today we are-“ I look down at my phone as a notification pushed past my do not disturb, Johnnie Guilbert like your photo.

I knew Johnnie,we had text back and forth for a while about doing a video idea even though we had never done it. I had met him at a convention and most likely acted like the biggest fan girl alive.

I clicked on the notification and saw that the like was a photo from 2020,almost 4 years ago.

You:

Liking photos from 2020,huh?

Johnnie:

Sorry didn’t mean to.

You:

Nooo it’s okay sorry lol

Johnnie:

Okay good lol,thought you were mad

You:

No,no lol

Johnnie:

So how are you?

2 weeks later,

“I’ll see you again next week? Maybe another date?” I ask with a schoolgirl smile on my face, “Yeah ofcourse,I’d love that.” He replied and I smiled,kissing his cheek.

We walked back to my apartment and watched a movie,cuddling up to each other and sharing some popcorn whilst we watched some shitty romcom. Neither of us cared about the movie,though neither of us would say it. We just enjoyed the comfort of each other.

Around nine o’clock Johnnie left,I was sad to see him go but I knew he had an apartment to sleep in so I couldn’t exactly keep him.

6 months later,

“Hey Johnnie!” I smile down the phone,we hadn’t hung out a lot this week but I didn’t mind,opting to sleep on call for the week instead.

“Hey love,you okay?” He asks me and I smile at the nickname, “Yeah,im okay,you?” I ask and I could almost hear his smile.

It was always nice to hear johnnies voice,it had become comforting over the past month or so,despite his energetic attitude. He always knew when it was time to settle down and he always knew what to say and how to say it. It made me envy those closest to him.

“So how was your day?”

1 year later,

“Happy 6 month anniversary!” He said as he hugged me,I smiled and kissed him as I grabbed some chocolates I had bought him.

He handed me some flowers and chocolate and I smiled, “Happy 6 months!” I smiled at him,my face beaming with excitement.

One phone call 6 months ago had led me to become infatuated with him,though I would be lying to say that I hadn’t had a small crush on him since I first text him.

We sat down on his sofa in his apartment and smiled as we put on the same shitty romcom that we always do,it had become our tradition and no one was complaining. As long as I got to snuggle up to the comfort of his chest I didn’t mind.

It had become apparent to both of us that we didn’t really care what we watched as long as we were with each other. I smiled as I snuggled into his chest,something that had become somewhat familiar with us. He snaked his hand around my waist and we sat their in comfortable silence as we admired each other.

2 years later,

“Happy one year!” I say as I wake up next to him in our apartment, “Happy one year.” He smiled at me,clearly as tired as he always was,I smiled at his goofy little smile and kissed him on the cheek.

“I got you something.” Johnnie whispers as he reaches into his draw,on the other side of the bed. He pulls out a ring box and I smile as he opens it, “I got us those Pandora promise rings you like.”He says with a smile. I sit up in bed and shimmy onto his lap pulling him into a deep hug. “Thank you Johnnie!” I almost yell as I kiss all over his face.

“Do you wanna be the moon or the sun?” I ask and he shakes his head “Whatever you want princess.” He chuckles and I immediately give him the moon ring. “Johnnie,we’re literally the sun and the moon.” I smile and he nods his head, “I love you so much,thank you!” I say happily and he smiles at me as he gives me a peck to the lips.

“I got you something too!” I say with a huge smile beaming across my face, I reach into my draw and pull out three wrapped presents. I feel like a parent watching their child open their presents with glee.

“Awh thank you baby!” He says pulling me back in for a hug and I smile,accepting the hug gratefully.

6 years later,

“I love you so much,I couldn’t imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone else,Y/n Y/l/n, will you marry me?”

“Yes!!!”

[shadowkoo]

A Sweet Mistake

→ Summary: Your boyfriend texts you something rather surprising that sends you spiraling through past memories.

↠ yeosang x f.reader | 1.1k words | 18+ ↠ genre: smut, angst, meet ugly au, (there’s also a dash of fluff bc why not)

→ Prompts: #32. “I dare you.” + #48. Sometimes you question how everything could have turned out if that day had gone differently.

→ Warnings: getting dumped via text, praise, being called a good girl (bc you are duh), talking on the phone while being fingered, Yeosang is kinda depicted as an dumb asshole but you’ll forgive me (and him) by the end lol

→ Author Note: Thank you for requesting @anyamaris I hope you enjoy! Learn more about my mini requests here. As always, all likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated <3

Your phone dings, drawing your attention away from the book you’ve been devouring for the last hour. You blink several times before staring at the text you just received in total disbelief.

[ From Y♡ at 3:15 PM ]

‘I think we should break up’

A few seconds later another message pops up.

‘I’m sorry’

Your heart races as you reread both. He can’t be serious. No way. After how you spent all evening together? The fresh memory floods your mind…

- Flashback begins -

Yeosang smirks as his fingers curl inside you, bringing you closer and closer to the edge.

“Wait, wait!” you rush as you reach for your ringing phone, “That’s my boss's ringtone.”

“Go on, answer it.” His eyes flare, “I dare you.”

You’re not one to back down from a challenge, so you do. And at that very same moment, his lips find their way around your already sensitive clit.

“H-Hello,” you answer shakily, “Yes Ma’am, your schedule? It’s been confirmed and emailed to you. Uh-huh. Yes, okay. Will do.” You answer your boss's questions quickly and silence your moans with a hand over your mouth as she rambles on about flights for her upcoming trip.

Your breath catches in your throat as the heat grows hotter in your lower belly, you’re almost there.

Yeosang groans as your walls begin to tighten around his fingers. “God, you’re perfect,” he whispers before licking you right where you need him. “Let go for me, baby.”

“I’ll look into it and get back to you!” you rush out, quickly hanging up before she’s suspicious, and come undone onto your boyfriend's fingers and mouth, leaving behind a soft sheen of your release.

“That’s my good girl. I love you.”

- Flashback ends -

And that was just the start of the night. So what changed between then and now? He suddenly doesn’t love you anymore?

That thought sends a sharp pain directly to your chest and tears well in your eyes while you type a message back to him.

[ Sent at 3:30 PM ]

‘Why??? What’s going on?’

[ From Y♡ at 3:31 PM ]

‘I just think it’s for the best…’

‘I’ll come by your place later to pick up my things.’

So his mind is already made up. It’s a good thing that your workday is almost over. You need to go home and cry. Maybe you’ll doordash some dinner and ice cream too. You certainly deserve it.

The ride home on the train is quick, and thankfully no one pays any attention to you as tears fall silently. And before you know it, you’re staring at a box half full of things that belong to Yeosang.

Your fingers play with the bracelet around your wrist, the one he bought you for your three-month anniversary. Its charms are a sun, strawberry, and pie slice, all of which are a small reminder of the day you first met.

- Second flashback begins -

The soft spring sunshine tickles your skin as you walk to the train station in the mid-morning light. The birds are singing, flowers are blooming, and it seems like it’s going to be a good day.

You smile. Not just a good day, a great day.

All of those happy thoughts come quickly crashing down when something from above smacks onto your head, easily knocking you down to the ground.

You gasp after the sudden impact. “Ow. What the fuck?” Your fingers reach up and touch something gooey that’s now covering your hair and face. “Ew.”

“Oh my god! Are you okay?” a stranger asks, kneeling down beside you to help. “Here, I’ve got a couple of napkins in my pocket. Let me help you.”

“What is it? Why is it warm and sticky?!” you panic, not sure exactly what to do in this situation.

“It seems to be a type of dessert? A strawberry pie, perhaps?”

“You’re kidding,” you groan. “So someone decided to just throw a pie out a window? The universe hates me.”

The kind stranger laughs, “Or maybe the universe thought you could use a little more sweetness in your life?”

“Unlikely, but thanks,” you say, using one of the napkins he handed you to wipe your eyes clean. You can see better now, he’s a cute stranger - if you have to be totally honest. Of course you would meet someone attractive in a ridiculous way like this. It’s just your luck.

You lick your lips, it’s tasty at least. “What a waste of good pie.”

“I can’t believe it landed directly on your head. I watch the whole thing happen in slow motion,” he says, struggling to hold back another laugh. “I’m Yeosang. Normally I don’t laugh at pretty girls who almost get knocked out by flying desserts, so my apologies.”

“Apology accepted. I’m Y/N, normally I don’t smell like I came directly out of a strawberry bake off but here we are.”

- Second flashback ends -

And that was the beginning of it all.

Sometimes you question how everything could have turned out if that day had gone differently. For instance, if you would have been slightly late to leave for work you wouldn’t be sobbing while packing up his things right now. Which is the last thing you thought you would be doing after falling so easily for him.

But you’ve never been one to beg for someone to stay. You’ve always said, if they wanna leave, let them.

‘He’s worth fighting for.’ The voice in your head practically screams at you. ‘Don’t give up so easily.’

Your doorbell chimes, breaking your thoughts and letting you know that he’s here. He has a key, which is how he normally lets himself in, but you guess things are different now.

You take a deep breath before opening the door, not sure what to expect exactly.

“Hi,” he smiles nervously and looks down at his hands which are holding…flowers? “Can we pretend the last four hours didn’t happen? I had a momentary freak-out and realized that texting you about breaking up was a mistake.”

“What?” your brows furrow in confusion.

“I still want to be with you. It just kind of hit me earlier how much I love you and I can’t imagine you not being in my life. But everyone leaves me at some point, and to make it hurt less I thought that by breaking up with you, it would make a future difficult thing less painful in the present.”

“Well,” you ask, crossing your arms. “Did it work?”

“No, I’m an idiot.”

“That may be true, but I love you anyway.” You hug him tightly and let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding. “Next time you want to run because you’re scared, just remember that I will always love you, even when you make mistakes - like believing that I’m going to leave you.”

“Well, that’s good to know. I’m still sorry.”

“Good. You should be.”

©shadowkoo 2024. All rights reserved.

[wooahaes]

cause you’re my flower

pairing: non-idol!seungkwan x gn!reader, ft roommate!dk

word count: 9.3k~

warnings: angst, no happy ending. usage of the hanahaki disease trope + mentions of surgery (& hospitals). heartbreak, depictions of illness (via hanahaki), reader struggles with breathing some. vernon says ‘dude’ but its unclear whether its aimed at reader or toward chan (it can be easily read either way). minimal proofreading, my bad.

daisy’s notes: ok google play flower + fallin’ flower by svt. in my heart theres a sequel of reader n joshua + jeonghan (or just reader and seokmin tbh, both could work) slowly falling in love lol but i doubt anyone wants that fic

It all started with a tickle in the back of your throat in early winter.

In your defense, you’d just thought you were coming down with something. From the corner of a cozy cafe, you waited for Seungkwan with a burning hot cup of tea in a to-go cup between your hands. Maybe you’d make another cup when you went home--black tea, maybe, with honey for your health. Seokmin would probably give you a soup recipe if you asked and help you make it, too (the perks of having a lovely roommate). But that could wait, as you saw Seungkwan walk into the cafe. He spotted you, smiling and waving before he went to order his Americano. He’d asked you to meet him here, and yet you’d arrived before he did. You’d tease him about it later: you always seemed to be the one who showed up to places before he did (out of habit for getting places early, to be fair).

Soon enough, Seungkwan had sat across from you, making small talk while he opened the plastic. You’d been talking about work when you noticed the way he fumbled the straw, the plastic hitting the table.

Was he nervous...?

“Everything okay?” You tilted your head, as if it’d give you a better look at him. His eyes flickered up to meet your own, and you smiled. “You can tell me anything, you know.”

Seungkwan let out a sigh a moment later, annoyed that his nerves had triumphed over his attempt to act casual. “I went out on a date.”

For a second, your smile faltered. “Oh?”

“And it went well,” he said, pushing his straw into his drink. The ice clinked as he picked it up, taking a long sip before setting it back down. “She wants to go out again, but...”

“But?”

He met your gaze again. “I have no idea what I’m doing.”

In another life, you’d probably laugh at him. Tease him over being clueless before asking what they’d agreed on. But that damn tickle in the back of your throat made you cough, smile falling as you reached for your drink. Seungkwan, kind as he always was, had immediately moved to push it into your hands. He waited, watching you take a long sip of your tea until your throat felt soothed.

“Are you sick?” He frowned, brows drawing tightly together. “I should have asked before asking you to meet me--”

You waved him off. “I’m fine, Kwannie,” you forced your voice to stay lighter, as if nothing was wrong. “Don’t worry about me.”

Yet he pouted, “Have you been taking your vitamins? It’s cold out. If you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll get sick...”  

Again, you dismissed the thought. “I’m fine,” you pushed further. “So... Do you like her?”

His face flushed at the question as he averted his gaze, taking another long sip through his straw instead of answering your question. “She’s... really kind,” he settled on a moment later. “I think she really likes me.”

Who wouldn’t like you? You cast that thought aside. “That’s good,” you kept your tone even. “So... You’re telling me all of this because...?”

“I want to buy her flowers,” he said. “And I want someone to go with me, and Vernon can’t--not that I’d ask him. You know flowers. So...”

Despite that same damn feeling in your throat picking back up, you swallowed hard and nodded. “Of course I’ll go with you,” you said. “You didn’t have to ask me out to coffee to ask that.”

Seungkwan’s face flushed once more. “I...” He knew you had a point. “I just wanted to see you. Is that so wrong?” When you began to cough again, Seungkwan frowned, “I’ll get you some napkins. You should go home and rest,” he stood up. “Seriously...” He huffed, “We’re friends. You should have told me you weren’t feeling well.”

Truthfully, you didn’t know you were coming down with something. You’d been fine up until he asked you to come meet him, and even then it had only been that tiny tickle in the back of your throat. With napkins pushed into your hands, you bid Seungkwan farewell before leaving--but not without him saying he’d text Seokmin and demand that he take care of you. He was your close friend, that’s what friends were for (and Seungkwan could probably recount the times he’d helped Vernon and Chan when they were feeling awful, albeit from a distance with a mask on and a bag of medicine held as far from himself as possible to minimize the risk of getting sick himself). You’d promised him that you’d let him know when you were home safe and sound, because Seungkwan was a worrier when the people he cared about were struggling, and that had been enough for him to finally let you go.

When you came home, Seokmin had been looking through the fridge. “Seungkwan said you’re sick,” he called out without looking up. “I think I have a recipe--”

“Oh my god, it’s not that serious,” you said, slipping into your house slippers. “I might be getting a cold. I’ll make some tea and rest--it won’t be a big deal.”

Seokmin looked up. “Are you sure? I’ll make us soup tonight,” he turned his attention back to the fridge. “I might run to the store--”

You immediately began to sputter and cough again, something in your throat moving upward with each hack. Seokmin immediately rushed over to you, wide-eyed as he hit you between the shoulder blades as you leaned over the sink. Gasping for air, you continued to choke until something finally fell from your mouth: a wet glob of petals, bright yellow standing out against the stainless steel. You stood there, heaving as Seokmin wordlessly rubbed circles into your back as you caught your breath.

Fuck.

Hanahaki Disease. Of all the things your family was saddled with, this was the absolute fucking worst. While not purely related to genetics, there were the rare families that were more prone to the stupid disease. You’d never win the lottery, but you’d win this shit. Your mother had it once when she was a teenager, and so did her father, and her father’s grandmother because not every bitch in your family has been saddled with this shit. You’d hoped that you’d lucked out.

Considering you were sitting on an examination table and the plastic bag of those stupid yellow carnation petals you’d coughed up, clearly you had not. Seokmin had brought you to the doctor, insisting that you have someone out in the waiting room. And since you knew exactly who these feelings were linked to, you refused to bring Seungkwan or Vernon or Chan into this: two of them would spill shit because this was too big to keep secret.

“Surgery is an option,” the doctor said to you. In your pissed state, you almost wanted to snap back that you knew that because of your family history. But she hadn’t done anything to you, and you bit back any bitter comments as she continued to talk about how the procedure was entirely safe.

Your parents, luckily, had already agreed to pay for the procedure before you even brought it up. You’d called them after spitting up the flower, and your mother had said they’d pay for it to save your life. What you hadn’t told them was that you weren’t entirely sure about the procedure at the moment. You’d heard the horror stories both from family and people outside of it. Your mother had woken up and gone back to school a few days later, and she felt... nothing when she saw her former crush. He used to be her friend, and the surgery had been what led to their friendship ending. Your grandpa told you that he hadn’t regret itted in the slightest: the young man he’d been smitten for had moved on, he never saw him again, and he recovered well. 

But you? Seungkwan was your friend. One of your close friends. How were you supposed to face him after surgery and feel nothing? At the worst, you might not even remember him since the recovery period differed for plenty of people. Your grandpa had told you that: his grandpa had told him when he was a boy that he forgot her face entirely, and that it was for the best. Better to live without remembering them than die gasping for another breath and choking up flowers. How were you supposed to tell Seungkwan that you couldn’t get close to him again? That this would be it between the two of you because if you stayed around him too much, you held the risk of it coming back?

You couldn’t. The idea of hurting Seungkwan was... hard to swallow. Or maybe that was also the petals you started coughing up again, your doctor quickly pushing a paper towel into your hands.

“Luckily we have medication that’ll help slow the process,” she told you, already jotting something down. “A surgeon will get in touch with you to help you figure out what comes next, alright? I’ll give you a call in a day once we get those x-rays back.”

You mumbled some sort of thanks before gathering your things. Seokmin rose once you re-entered the waiting room post-payment for your visit, and made his way over to you.

“I’m fine,” you said, continuing past him. “Gotta stop by the pharmacy.”

Seokmin’s gaze softened. “Well? What did she say?”

You waited until the two of you were outside. “I guess I’m getting surgery.”

“You guess?! You have to get it,” Seokmin said, “you’ll die if you don’t! You aren’t considering not--”

“I don’t know!” You hugged yourself tight. “I just--I don’t know. How am I supposed to tell Seungkwan I can’t see him anymore?”

Seokmin slowed to a stop, staring at you. “It’s Seungkwan?”

... Fuck, you weren’t supposed to say that. No one was supposed to know. But if you had to pick a person, Seokmin was trustworthy. He wouldn’t tell. Not until later, at least. And if you went through the procedure, you’d at least have someone who could keep him away, if not break the news for you...

Seokmin said your name, pity in his eyes. “You should tell him.”

“I can’t.”

Seokmin reached for your hands, gently curling his fingers around them. “You should,” he pushed further. “I’ll be there with you if you want me to be. But you should tell him. What are you going to do if you don’t? Just stop seeing him?”

Honestly, it didn’t seem like such a bad plan. A dick move, definitely, but cutting him out entirely and letting the news get to him secondhand? He’d never want to see you again after that heartbreak. It’d do the job.

“Don’t,” Seokmin said, knowing the look on your face. “We need to go to the pharmacy, right?”

You nodded, pulling your hands free from his. You started forward, only to feel the telltale feeling in your throat of flower petals again. With a tissue pushed into your hand from Seokmin, you coughed up a few petals before curling your fingers around them tight, hands shaking. Seokmin came back to your side, leaning forward to see that tears were brimming around your eyes.

Your name fell from his lips, and before you knew it, Seokmin had enveloped you in his warm embrace. “It’s okay,” he promised. “I’ll help you. You’re not in this alone.”

At least you had Seokmin. In the end, he’d be all you’d have, and you knew it. But you could manage with just Seokmin for right now.

“Seokmin said you went to the doctor.”

Seungkwan stood a little further from you, happily looking over the different flowers on display. True to your word, you’d come with him after promising that you were fine. The medication was working at temporarily slowing down the disease’s progression (thank you, modern medicine--you only choked up flowers every once in a while now), and you hadn’t felt anything. Maybe a little numbness in your chest, but nothing major. That was a normal side effect, apparently, to help with the whole flowers-growing-in-your-lungs thing. You side-eyed the stupid bouquet of yellow carnations, though.

Seungkwan called your name, and your attention snapped back to him. He’d come over, looking down at the flowers. “These are pretty.”

“You don’t want them,” you pushed past him. “If you’re going to pick carnations, you should pick the red ones. Or the pink ones, if you want.”

He’d stayed right where he was. “I don’t know,” he said. “These are pretty.”

“There’s better yellow flowers,” you said. “If she knows anything about flower language, you’d be telling her a big ole “nope, not interested.””

Seungkwan immediately turned away. “This is why I have you here,” he made his way back to you, already latching himself back onto your arm. “You’re the expert... What do you think? I want to give her something bright and pretty.”

You were far from an expert. You just... looked up flower meanings sometimes. Maybe it came from a morbid curiosity when your mother told you, after your badgering, what flowers she had (purple hyacinth--sorrow, a beg for forgiveness). You had looked up your own: of course loving Seungkwan would give you something pretty and bright like him. At least they were better than the red spider lilies (death) that your grandfather had coughed up.

“Are roses off the table?”

“Aren’t they too serious?” Seungkwan frowned at you. “This is our second date... I don’t want it to look like I’m moving too fast.”

“Then go for tulips,” you said, guiding him over to where a bouquet stood of pink tulips. “The pink ones would work.”

“Are you sure?”

If you didn’t know that Seungkwan was anxious, you would have rolled your eyes. He... really seemed to like this girl. There were legends that said if you could convince him to love you back, the flowers would go away on their own. But if doing that tore him away from someone else he already liked...

“Of course I’m sure,” you smiled at him. “She’ll love them.”

Seungkwan had smiled at you, squeezing your arm. “This is why you’re my best friend,” he said. “Besides Vernon.”

The disclaimer there made you smile. If he didn’t specify, you would have texted Vernon immediately. You turned your attention away from him for a moment, gaze caught on a bouquet of white lilies kept in a case. Seungkwan followed your gaze, his grasp on you easing up. He quietly excused himself to go speak to the florist, and you made up something about needing fresh air.

Standing outside the shop, you watched people trudge past. The paint on the bench was beginning to flake off, pieces of dark green and pale white petals coming off onto your fingers. You dragged your hand along the leg of your jeans, and pulled out your phone. You’d need to take your medicine in another few hours, before you went to bed. Once in the morning, once at night: the nightly dose kept you from waking up with petals in your throat (as well as knocked you out pretty well). It worked. It wouldn’t work forever, not when the disease became worse, but at least you had a little more time before you needed surgery. It gave you time to think about what really mattered now.

“Is something wrong?” Seungkwan had exited the store, bell still jingling as the door shut behind him. He held the bouquet in his arms securely, yet gentle enough to keep from crushing a single flower.

Tell him. You could practically hear Seokmin urging you to do so. “Seungkwan...” You felt your hope dwindle in your chest. Guilt. Don’t ruin this. Leave him with good memories of you. “What would you do if something happened to us?” 

He frowned, settling into the spot next to you. “Did the doctor say something?”

“No! No, just...” You frowned. “Theoretically... if we couldn’t be friends anymore... Would you move on?”

Seungkwan watched you with careful eyes, mouth slightly agape as he struggled to answer the question. How would you answer that kind of thing? “You’re scaring me,” he said a moment later. “If something’s wrong--”

“Nothing’s wrong,” you insisted. “It’s just--I dunno, I watched a stupid movie the other day,” you lied, hoping he would buy it. “And I just kept wondering about what would happen if we couldn’t be friends anymore. It’s stupid.”

He let out a sigh of relief, back falling against the bench before he immediately smacked your arm. “You scared me! I thought you were dying!” He huffed, “You shouldn’t talk so seriously about a movie. Seriously...”

“You didn’t answer the question,” you pouted at him. “Would you move on?”

“No,” he said, “because you’re stuck with me forever.”

You rolled your eyes, fighting back a smile. “Uh-huh.”

“You love me,” he laughed, one of his arms slipping through your own. His cheek pressed against your shoulder. “Right?”

... Right.

Seokmin sat behind the wheel, fingers drumming against it as he slightly bobbed his head to the music. He still hadn’t told you where the two of you were going--only that you had to go with him because this was important. Important enough that he was driving to a different part of the city, listening carefully to each instruction from his phone’s map service. He told you that he’d explain when you got there (which was what he told you after he told you he’d explain in the car). Despite your slight demand that he take you out to dinner at a casual place in the area that Mingyu had been raving about, you trusted Seokmin enough to blindly follow him like this.

He pulled the car into a spot, quickly shooting a text to someone before he turned his attention to scrounging up the change to pay for parking. “Okay,” he said. “You said the surgeon called for an exam before setting the date.”

“Uh-huh?”

“And you told me that you were still on the fence about it.”

Stupidly, you had. Although, when you thought about it, it was good that you told someone. Your parents were completely set on it without giving you space to decide: Seokmin at least listened to you.

“I’m going to help you make up your mind,” he said. He pointed up to a higher apartment on the building. “My friends live there. I’ll introduce you when we get there.”

Once he’d paid the meter, Seokmin took your arm and guided you into the building. Soon enough, the two of you were standing in an elevator. You ignored the worried look Seokmin gave you when you coughed up petals into another tissue (this time your own--you’d stolen one of those pocket packs from Seokmin so he wouldn’t have to dote on you so heavily). The elevator whisked the two of you higher and higher before chiming, and Seokmin gestured for you to follow as he looked back at his phone. Wordlessly, you followed him down the hallway until he finally arrived at a door.

Before he could even knock, the door opened. A pretty man stood in the doorway, hair pulled back into the tiniest of ponytails as he warmly greeted Seokmin. Then his gaze met your own, and that warm smile fell a little.

“Is this them?”

Seokmin nodded. He said your name, before turning back to his friend, “this is Jeonghan. We were in a choir together in college.”

Jeonghan stepped out of the way. “I’ll let him know you’re here,” he said. “Just a warning that he doesn’t really remember too much, so... Please don’t stress him out too much.”

The two of you stood in the entryway as Jeonghan left, calling out for someone named Joshua. With a curious glance to Seokmin, you began to pull off your coat to leave behind as Jeonghan returned with another man--equally handsome in looks, with the gentlest eyes you thought you’d ever seen on a person.

“Hi,” he said, voice warm already, “so, uh... You’re the one with Hanahaki?” When you mustered up a nod, he extended a hand to you. “I’m Joshua.”

You introduced yourself in turn, giving Seokmin another weird look. “And... I’m here because...?”

“Hanahaki nearly killed me,” Joshua told you outright. “And Seokmin said you’re considering not getting the surgery. I’m supposed to tell you why it’s a really bad idea before you make up your mind.”

You immediately glared at Seokmin. “I thought you said you wouldn’t force me to change my mind--”

“And he’s not,” Joshua said, gently guiding you forward. “I wasn’t going to get them removed either. But things were... really, really bad. So I just want to tell you what you’re signing yourself up for.”

Jeonghan made a comment about making the two of you some tea, and you followed Joshua out onto the balcony for some privacy. He brushed a hand through his hair, settling into a cozy chair. There was an easel set up in the corner, empty of a canvas but stained with paint. Joshua followed your gaze to it.

“Do you paint?” He asked, and when you shook your head, he smiled. “I don’t, either. It’s Jeonghan’s.”

“And you two are...?”

“Friends,” he clarified easily. “Really close friends. Look... Seokmin told me a little about you. You’re in love with your friend, right?”

It felt weird for a stranger to say it out loud. But you settled into your chair, nodding. “Yeah. His name is Seungkwan,” you said quietly, “and I didn’t mean to fall for him, but I did, and now...”

The conversation died as Jeonghan stepped out, setting two mugs between the two of you. You thanked him, and waited until the balcony door slid shut again before reaching for your own mug.

“And now you’re coughing up petals,” Joshua said, taking his own mug. “I get it. I didn’t think it’d happen to me, either.”

“What happened?”

Joshua opened his mouth to speak, only to wince for a moment. “Shit--” He lifted a hand to his temple, rubbing at it before setting down the mug. You watched the way he went quiet, eyes squeezing shut. “I--I don’t know,” he said. “Jeonghan told me that there was a girl. I fell in love with her, she rejected me, and then I started coughing up flowers.”

You raised a brow. “He told you?”

The pain began to subside, and Joshua opened his eyes again after a moment before nodding. “He told you, right? I don’t remember all of it. Her name, her face... her favorite color.” He stared off for a moment. “Nothing. I’m apparently a rare case, but the doctors said it’s because I let it progress too far.”

“You didn’t see anyone?”

He shook his head. “I told Jeonghan I wasn’t going to. He’ll say I was being dramatic, and maybe I was, but... I didn’t want to lose her. I loved her,” his gaze didn’t meet yours again. “It wasn’t her fault she didn’t love me. Not all cases are fatal, I mean. Jeonghan says I had this stupid hope she’d change her mind because the guy she liked was a dick. My mom kept telling me that I needed to see someone. I think...”

He took a deep breath. And then he slowly exhaled, curling back up in his chair. The thick sweater he wore fell down over his hands, and those pretty pale brown curls were rustled by the cold breeze. But neither of you moved to go back inside.

“I think I was punishing myself. I don’t remember why, or how I came to that conclusion, but it makes sense. I was the one who fell in love with her when it wasn’t going to happen. I was the one who deserved to suffer for it.”

Something about the somber way he spoke shook you. Like he had resigned himself to death there, the heartbreak of a love so powerful not being returned had broken him. Maybe that was why you still weren’t sure about the surgery. It’d be admitting you were stupid enough to fall for someone who never liked you. 

“So it got worse,” Joshua continued after a moment, lidded eyes staring down into his tea. “And worse. And then Jeonghan came home one day, and found me collapsed and gasping for air. He called the paramedics, they managed to clear my airway of the blood and flowers, and I was taken in for an emergency procedure to remove the flowers. If he hadn’t come home, I would have died...”

He didn’t need to say more. You understood the feeling well. If Seokmin hadn’t pushed you to see someone, you’d probably be in the same boat. A morbid part of you had to wonder if you’d be the same way: lying on the kitchen floor, cold tiles under your fingers as you gasped for one last breath of air.

“I’m a rare case,” he said, eyes meeting your own again. “Most people who get the procedure done before it progresses too much still retain all their memories. And I know there’s research still being done on whether Hanahaki always returns if you stay around the person, since a lot of people are reluctant to break ties when they’ve fallen in love with their friend. But if I could go back in time... I don’t think I would hesitate.”

“Have you met other people?” The question pushed out of you before you could process it.

He smiled at you warmly. “I’ve met you.” But then he laughed softly, “A few. No one I’ve liked yet, but I have hope. I started seeing a therapist once I was released from the hospital, and she’s helped me with everything. They say it’s really rare for Hanahaki to take hold twice in the same person--something about the antibodies created, I’m not sure.” He set his mug down. “But... I think Seokmin’s worried you’re trying to punish yourself, too. Just because you fell in love with your friend.”

You said nothing, arms curling back around yourself to hug yourself tight.

“It’s not a crime to fall in love with someone,” Joshua said slowly and clearly. “Just like how it’s not a crime he doesn’t love you back. I know you don’t want to cut him out of your life, but you need to do what’s best for you. You’ll love someone else one day. But if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t live to experience it.”

Not all cases are fatal, you wanted to point out to him again. It goes away in rare cases.

Rare. Just like the disease itself.

He began to reach into his pockets, pulling out his wallet. “The therapist I see is a grief counselor, but she apparently did some major studies in helping people like us recover after the surgery. If you tell me your room number, I’ll send you a bear.” He slid the card across the table to you. “I figured you’d be tired of flowers.”

The thought made you smile. Without a word, you accept the card, pushing it into your own wallet to consider later. “I didn’t say I’d go through with it.”

“I know. Send me your room number. I’ll give you my number when we’re back inside,” he pushed back his chair. “It’s freezing out here.”

You scooted your own chair back, about to stand when Joshua turned back to you.

“When you tell him,” Joshua said, “make sure you tell him that you still treasure him. Okay?”

You stared at him a moment, brows drawing together.

“Jeonghan didn’t get to do the same before his own procedure,” he said quieter. “She was his friend, too."

(It wasn’t until then that you noticed the top few buttons of Jeonghan’s shirt were open, and you could see the faint incision scar up the center of his chest.)

Seungkwan had invited you over to a movie night--just the two of you. With your medicine kicking in, you’d agreed. Saturday night movie nights were a longstanding tradition, sometimes including Vernon if he wasn’t busy (and occasionally Chan, ever since you unbanned him from them (he had bad taste in college)). But tonight would just be the two of you, and you’d had a long day at work, so something about curling up with Seungkwan and watching something stupid seemed more appealing. At least the petals weren’t a huge deal. You could hide them if need be, but they hadn’t been acting up too badly yet. Maybe you coughed them up a bit more, which wasn’t great when you had to answer phone calls at work, but people were usually understanding when you made a quick apology and went straight back into that mask of professionalism. You’d fully be off while you recovered from surgery, taking off a few personal days leading up to it as well, and hopefully be fine to return soon enough. But you kept tissues on your desk and had grown better at coughing up the petals and immediately tossing them away before anyone could see or be bothered by it. Even Seokmin rarely noticed when it was acting up again. 

And yet the universe seemed to have the absolute worst fucking timing.

“You didn’t have to say yes,” Seungkwan said from the other end of the couch as he watched you shift uncomfortably, coughing into your elbow while searching for your pack of tissues. “If you aren’t feeling well, you should be resting. I don’t know why you’re even at work right now. Your doctor should have given you the written excuse to get your boss off your back.”

“She did, I just didn’t use it. I’ll take off next week.”

Seungkwan rolled his eyes, turning his attention back to the drama on the screen--something he’d been meaning to watch. “I have extra vitamins you can take with you. Remind me and I’ll give them to you before you leave.”

The female lead had begun coughing up flowers dramatically on the screen, and you felt a sense of bitterness at the sight of it. You had seen this one already. She’d die in the end, right before the male lead could confess that he fell for her instead. It was the dramatic tragedy of someone suffering for their love. Talking to Joshua had been enough to push that thought out of your mind: you’d get the procedure done to remove your own flowers. The harder part, and maybe the part people didn’t talk about often, was the way to cut someone out. You’d read articles both for people like you and for people trying to get out of toxic situations in general.

They said that you didn’t owe anyone an explanation. To do it publicly to keep yourself safe. That this was a process you had to go through, too, and that it was okay to dwell... except for the timer you had on your own situation, but you still had a little more time. Some lists even said to block them entirely once everything was over, just to keep them away for good. Other people said to have a real talk with someone, to explain the situation to them in order to ensure your health in the future. Everyone said it was the hardest thing to do to tell someone that you loved them and that them not reciprocating meant you were struggling worse all because of stupid flowers in your lungs, but to make it clear that it wasn’t their fault (although you’d seen people bitter and angry on both sides, some claiming it was guilt-tripping, others claiming that it technically was their fault). There was a mature way to say “I love you, I know you don’t love me back, so we need to end this so that I can live” according to plenty of people. Some people said the distance helped once the conversation was over.

But every time you looked at Seungkwan, you felt an ache in your heart and a deeper one in your lungs.

“Does this ever bother you?” He said, not looking up. He picked up another piece of popcorn. “Seeing it treated like this?”

“It’s dramatic,” you shrugged. “People use illness all the time for stuff.”

“Still...” He sighed. “I can’t imagine what it feels like to be physically hurting like this. Heartbreak is hard enough. But coughing up flowers? Isn’t that worse?”

“It is,” you hummed. “That’s what my family said, at least.”

He sighed. “If this ever happens to you, I’m taking care of you until you recover. I promise.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Kwannie.”

He looked at you, offended. “I would be a great nurse! You know that,” he huffed.

You wanted to respond and say he couldn’t keep that kind of promise to you. But instead you turned over, watching the secondary male lead in a scene with his own love interest and the actual male lead eavesdropping. “What would your girlfriend think, hm?” You settled on teasing him, if nothing else but to shove your own feelings aside. “Taking care of someone else...”

“She knows I love my friends,” he said. And then you felt him smack your leg. “She’s not my girlfriend yet!”

“Yet.”

He looked sheepish at his slip of the tongue. “It feels a little too soon,” he said, turning back away from you. “I’ve known her for a while, but...”

“If you love her, you shouldn’t hesitate.” You curled up into yourself a little. “Life is short. What if something happens? You shouldn’t wait forever to tell someone how much they mean to you.”

“I know that,” he said, casual as could be. “That’s why I tell you all how much I love you.”

You cracked a small smile, almost telling him that he only did that because he was a big softie who loved all his friends (and liked being told in return that he was loved, too). Seungkwan was always the most physically touchy of your friend circle: that was why he was either hanging off of you or Vernon most of the time, more than content to be snuggled up to your arm or hugging you from behind during casual moments. It’s something that’s made both of you be mistaken for Seungkwan’s partner, sure, but you were always able to laugh it off both before and after you developed feelings for him.

(There was one instance of the two of you playing up the dramatics when someone tried to tell you that your boyfriend was cheating on you with the other person. Vernon had mouthed for you to slap him, and you’d stormed off only to meet back up in the car with a incredibly flustered Seungkwan who swore he couldn’t take the two of you anywhere anymore.)

“Yeah,” you said, half-heartedly as realization hit you again that these moments were fleeting. Soon you wouldn’t be able to see him anymore, not for prolonged moments. You couldn’t risk the flowers coming back once they were gone. “Love you, too, Seungkwan.”

Maybe one day you’d tell him just how much before you lost the feeling entirely.

You’d set the date. You’d gone in for the visit your surgeon had requested, which was primarily for them to take a new x-ray to check the progress. In another world, you’d be looking at the flowers on that results sheet and thinking that it was a pretty art project. But the reality of the situation was that the disease had progressed, and you’d be going in on Friday to have them surgically removed. Your parents had already come into the city with a hotel room booked for the week (the downside of your apartment with Seokmin being so small: you sure as hell weren’t going to boot him from his own room despite his offer, and your parents would rather stay somewhere closer to the hospital). You’d had dinner with them yesterday night after your appointment, talking through everything with them. Although your father would never know the feelings your mother described to you, he had been supportive as he could be while she talked you through the procedure for the third time since that first phone call.

Which was why you were now, on Wednesday, waiting for Seungkwan... and Vernon and Chan. Seokmin was sitting next to you, happy to play moral support as you broke the news. You’d figured everything out: you’d tell them about the procedure, and then ask for a day with Seungkwan tomorrow in order to experience something nice before you were stuck in the hospital for your recovery period. Except for the past where you broke the news that you could never see him again, that you loved him, and that you treasured your friendship and would never hold it against him that he didn’t reciprocate. Maybe Vernon and Chan would never speak to you again, too, but that was a fallout for later you.

Except you could see Vernon and Chan walking up to the restaurant without Seungkwan, and you knew for a fact that they would have come together.

“Seungkwan couldn’t make it,” Chan had said as he took his seat. “Didn’t he text you?”

(He did: his sister was in the city for the day and he rarely got to see her, so he apologized and said he’d talk to you tomorrow. You just hadn’t heard your phone go off, or you would have left with Seokmin far earlier and figured out something else.) 

Seokmin could see the panic on your face. He said your name, hand grazing your arm as you pushed it away.

“I’m fine,” he said.

He lowered his voice, albeit it was useless considering how close the other two were, “You’re supposed to be taking it easy now. Panicking only makes it worse--”

“Makes what worse?” Chan asked, looking between the two of you. “Wait. Are you dying?”

“No--” You said, and at the worst fucking possible moment, you began to cough. “Shit.”

Seokmin reached for the napkins as you shielded yourself as best as you could, flower petals falling in a thick clump into the white napkin. The petals, while on your medication, were rare. Not gone entirely, and of course they’d pick this moment to act up.

Vernon stared at you, hand groping through the air until it hit Chan’s arm. “Dude.”

You could practically see two bulbs light up above each guy’s head. “Don’t tell Seungkwan.”

“What the fuck do you mean ‘don’t tell Seungkwan’?!” To your surprise, Vernon had raised his voice a little. He immediately lowered it after nodding in apology to the other patrons, “you have Hanahaki! You could die if--”

“My surgery’s on Friday,” you said, “so technically I won’t die.”

“That’s beside the point!” Chan stared at you. “You’re--Why didn’t you tell us sooner?! How long have you known?!”

You said nothing. Seokmin only looked at you.

“A few weeks,” you finally confessed. “But I’m fine and I’m getting them removed, so I’ll be fine. Just... I wanted to tell Seungkwan myself.” I needed to tell him I love him before I don’t remember feeling it anymore.

Vernon knew you, though. Chan might be a little oblivious at times, but Vernon had observed you and Seungkwan enough to know. He tore his eyes away from your own, and you could hear him mumble something about how this was awful timing. The thought made your chest ache.

This was awful timing? For who? For Seungkwan? Sure, you were pretty much dying right now and having to make sure you didn’t choke to death on flowers in your sleep--But, fuck, this was inconvenient timing for Seungkwan apparently. If you had it your way, you wouldn’t have ever developed feelings for him. But Seungkwan was sweet. He was your close friend. He was the one who came over and nursed you back to health a year ago when you had the flu, even if he scolded you for not taking better care of your health.

He’d probably scold you now, too. Seungkwan would have told you off for not telling him sooner, and then he would probably have let you cry in his arms because of how terrified you were underneath everything. The procedure itself was safe: the aftermath could be anything. Meeting Joshua had confirmed that for you. What if you were like him one day? Still living with your roommate, unable to remember the reason behind the scars on your sides (or down the center of your chest--you shivered to imagine what that would mean for you, and you refused to bring that topic up to Jeonghan who clearly would rather not talk about it) without pain? You’d looked it up before: the pain was a psychological thing... or, at least, that was the leading theory. Joshua was rare, people were still researching it in full, but they said it was in the same vein as people who lived through trauma only to not remember a thing because they blocked it all out. A safety measure out of your own control.

(Sometimes you wonder whether Joshua even wanted to remember.)

Hanahaki tore people apart. The fact that you were more prone to it only made you angrier at the world, at the stupid flowers stuck in your lungs. At yourself for being so foolish to fall for Boo Seungkwan when he was only ever going to be your friend.

Vernon’s gaze softened as he watched you, so quiet and acting so much smaller. Like a child, almost: uncertain of what would come next, but with only so much guidance that you could fully understand. The swelling, the stiffness, the different feelings around your incisions. But what about what really came next? The empty feeling when you saw Seungkwan again unless you pulled yourself together to tell him that he couldn’t see you again. Not for long, not without risking yourself. He’d heard the stories and was lucky enough that his own instances of unrequited love were met with plenty of chocolate and nights with his friends, watching movies and giving him a space to feel and breathe and think.

“So what do you want us to do?”

You lifted your gaze from where you’d begun staring down into your lap, meeting Vernon’s eyes. “I...”

“We’re not gonna tell him,” he promised, despite the look Chan gave him. “I mean, that’s your thing, right? It’s your thing to tell, unless you want us to tell.”

You shook your head. “I’ll meet up with him tomorrow,” you said. “And I’ll tell him everything.”

Chan looked between the two of you, realization slowly swallowing him whole. “We’ll come visit,” he said quietly. “Is that okay?”

“It’s not a huge deal,” you shrugged. “I mean. It’s surgery, but they’ll probably keep me in for a few days of observation before I can go home. Just... Don’t send me flowers.”

It’s a weak joke, but it earned a smile from Chan. With that, you decided to shove the conversation aside for a meal with your friends instead. It felt comforting to pretend that everything was okay, as much as you wished Seungkwan was there with you. It’d be nice to hold his hand under the table for a minute, just to know that he cared about you still. That, even after you walk out of his life for good, he’d still care for you in the future.

It wasn’t until you were back in the passenger side of Seokmin’s car that you called Joshua and asked if he was busy. That night, the two of you were sitting in the Hong-Yoon apartment so you could have a cozy night. As much as you wanted to go out for dinner with your parents, you needed to stay away from surgery talk (and, unfortunately for you, that was how your mother calmed herself down: going over the procedure out loud to try and reassure both of you that everything was going to be fine). Joshua had an arm draped around your shoulders, blanketing you in his warmth as the four of you were watching some drama they’d found on Netflix.

Seokmin left to use the bathroom, and Jeonghan shifted over so that he’d be resting against Joshua’s other side. A moment later, he lifted his head, eyes meeting your own. “It’s going to be okay,” he reached out, hand finding your own for a reassuring squeeze. “I recovered well. You’ll be okay.”

Wordlessly, you snuggled further into Joshua’s chest now that you didn’t have Seokmin anchoring you from the other side, still holding Jeonghan’s hand for a moment longer. You shut your eyes for a moment, just listening to the sound of Joshua’s heartbeat. “Which one of you was first?”

Quiet. The sound of the movie felt so distant, a mere mumble of background noise as Jeonghan let out a long sigh.

“He was,” Jeonghan said. “I thought I’d be okay. Then we had to call our friend, Seungcheol, to help us.”

Joshua wrapped an arm around you. “Do you want me to be honest?”

You nodded.

“They still hurt sometimes,” he said. “The incisions. I can barely see them, but they’re still there.”

Suddenly, your stomach turned at the thought. You squeezed your eyes shut a little more. “I’m sorry--I know I brought it up, but can we drop this?”

Neither said anything. You merely curled up closer to the two people who’d been strangers until days ago, yet already felt so safe to be around. They felt like an escape from what you knew would come tomorrow. Even when Seokmin returned, curling up close to this bundle of limbs and shared trauma, you only felt safer.

Seungkwan had asked her to be his girlfriend. You only found out because he’d blasted it on every social media platform he was on, only tagged with the caption ‘day one ❤️‘ alongside a picture of the two of them silhouetted with the sunset in the background. Any other life and it’d be sweet. In this one, you merely felt bitter as you finally sent the text you’d been sitting on all day.

it’s really important. can we meet at the usual spot?

The moment he gave you his confirmation, you left your apartment. The park wasn’t too far from where you lived, although you’d always prefer to take the bus to it instead. With your coat pulled over your hoodie, you made the trek by foot instead. This used to be your picnic spot with Seungkwan, although you could easily see him going on dates there instead. As much as you wanted to be happy for him, the stupid ache in your lungs and the tickle of petals that eternally seemed to be plaguing you (at least it would be until you took your last dose of medicine before surgery--a smaller one than what you usually took to avoid complications, but enough that you’d be able to sleep easily) served as a cruel reminder of what would never be. That this would be the end.

Yet you saw him sitting on that stupid bench the two of you always met at, the glow of a streetlamp bathing him in light and making him look stupidly radiant. Or maybe that was what love could do to a person. The moment he saw you, he stood up, coming to hug you tight.

“Vernon said you’re having surgery tomorrow,” he said once he stepped back, hands holding your own. “Is it true?”

... At this point, you couldn’t be surprised Vernon would at least let that slip. Maybe he’d been debating coming to see you, and Vernon told him outright how important it was.

His fingers tangled with your own as he brought you to the bench, sitting down next to you. “Is it serious?” He paused, and then vaguely gestured toward his mouth and throat, “is it... you know?”

Seungkwan knew of your family history. You’d lamented it to him forever ago, saying that you hoped you’d be lucky enough to be spared by it. When you nodded, his gaze softened tremendously.

“Do they know?”

You don’t, you almost wanted to say. It’s you. I’m sorry. “I don’t know if I want to tell him.”

“Do I know them?”

You shook your head, unable to verbally lie to him.

He stared ahead, visibly upset. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t notice it sooner. I’ve just...”

He’d been falling for someone else more and more with each day. Deep down, you couldn’t blame him for that. If you didn’t know someone was going through it, you’d probably be blissfully doing the same.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been here for you,” he said a moment later. “Are you scared?”

“Terrified.” You tucked your hands into your hoodie pockets, leg bouncing. “I don’t know how I’m going to react.”

Seungkwan was good at faking smiles when things were rough, just to try and instill some confidence into someone who needed it. “You’ll pull through,” he squeezed your knee gently, and he left his hand there. “You’re strong. And... and when you get out, we’ll go out. Just the two of us. I’ll pay for our meal, and you can pick, and... and it’ll be thanks for helping me while you were struggling.”

Something about how genuine he sounded squeezed your heart tight, almost as if it’d pop with just a little more pressure. You looked up, “Seungkwan, I...”

I love you. I know you don’t love me back, and it’s okay. I’m sorry our friendship has to end like this.

And then he smiled at you, a little more genuine than before, just to reassure you. “It’ll be okay,” he said again, clueless to the storm inside of you.

Your words died in your throat. Instead, you just bit back your tears as you dove forward, hugging him tight. “I love you,” you said, a confession you couldn’t make directly to his face. “Thank you for being a good friend.”

His arms wound around you after a moment, squeezing you tight. “You’re not going to die, you know,” he said, laughing just a little. “It’s a safe procedure. I’ll see you when you wake up. Okay?”

Drifting back from him, you lied again, “Yeah. I’ll... I’ll see you then.”

With one truth spilling from your lips about going home and getting proper rest, the two of you parted ways. Despite the fact it only served to make your lungs ache worse, you jogged the way home. The sooner you were inside, the better. With the door shut and secured behind you, you let out a long sigh and then a groan of frustration at backing out yet again. You’d been pulling your jacket off when you heard Seokmin call out your name.

“Did you tell him?”

You sniffled hard, already feeling those tears welling back up. He opened his arms to you, and you almost tripped over yourself rushing to him as you broke down crying.

“I-I couldn’t,” you said between sobs.

And Seokmin could do nothing else but hold you tight, head resting against your own as he sheltered you through your storm.

Everything felt fuzzy.

The anesthesia hadn’t fully worn off by the time you were a little more awake. You’d answered their questions as best as you could while your head still felt full of clouds, but the procedure had been a success. The flowers were gone to good, likely going to get tossed out with the other waste and burned. Your mother recognized how completely out of it you still were, but you could see the relief on her face that you were okay. It took the sound of your dad gently coaxing her for her to agree to come back when you were far more lucid and well-rested.

At some point, Seokmin came in to see you. You barely remembered the encounter, but you stared at the teddy bear that sat nearby with a card being held between its plush paws (thanks to Seokmin’s efforts). It wasn’t from him, you’d later discover, but from Joshua and Jeonghan wishing you well (and making promises to see you again once you were discharged, maybe while you were recovering if they could make it during visiting hours).

Three days into your stay, you were fully aware and alert... and also recognizing the annoying tinge of pain that came from your incisions every single time you moved or even breathed. You could breathe clearer now, sure, but the ache was annoying nonetheless. Your doctor had been kind to you, understanding how tiring it could be to recover from the procedure. Your nurse, a tall kind man named Wonwoo, had taken your vitals. So when you heard a knock on your door, you were sure it was either whatever breakfast you were getting (you barely remembered your own order now), or your parents.

And after you called out for whoever it was to come in, you were met with Vernon’s face. He stopped where he stood, staring at you for a moment before apologizing and saying he wasn’t sure what to do. Chan was with him, too, hugging a big teddy bear that was clutching a ‘get well soon’ heart.

“You said not to send you flowers,” Chan said as he made his way over to you, and you accepted the stuffed animal with a thanks. “It was my idea.”

“Our idea,” Vernon rolled his eyes. Then he stopped, looking at the open door. “You wanted to see them. They’re awake.”

The guy that Vernon had been talking to walked into the room, pushing the door shut with an apology for hesitating. He started rambling about how he didn’t know whether you’d want so many people crowding you at once, sitting down at the edge of your bed as he started asking how you were doing. Were the flowers gone? Was the staff taking care of you? If you needed someone to speak on your behalf while your parents were gone, he would happily do it for you.

Vernon noticed the confused look on your face as this guy--friendly as he might be--kept talking to you. You’d answered his questions, sure, but you could see the way this stranger’s heart was visibly breaking in his eyes. His smile fell, and Vernon nudged him out of the way so that he could sit and talk to you for a few minutes. 

“Is there anything we can do for you? I mean, we were gonna pool together for one of those edible arrangements, but I wasn’t sure if your doctor was gonna restrict any of it...”

Chan had apologized, saying he needed a cup of coffee--it was too early for him--and he left with the other guy.

Vernon pushed himself back into your field of vision, and you felt yourself flounder a little for words. “No restrictions,” you said, brain still catching up as you had questions. “Sorry, Vernon, do I know him--”

He shook his head. “Nope. Just, uh... Rest up,” he patted your thigh. “I’ll see you when you get out, yeah?”

When he stepped back into the hallway, it was to the sound of Seungkwan sobbing. Chan had already gone to him, holding him and waving off any concerned staff that had probably seen this kind of thing before.

One of his best friends didn’t recognize him at all. He knew that that meant when it came to Hanahaki.

Chan had patted his back gently. “It’s not your fault you moved on,” he said quietly. “You didn’t know. None of us knew they liked you back--”

Vernon could feel his heart sink in his chest as he made his way over. His own future with you (as well as Chan’s) was in the air--both knowing the weight of keeping you in their lives could lead to future pain for both you and Seungkwan. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I told you--”

But Seungkwan shook his head, the weight of his own decisions beginning to suffocate him. “You were right,” he started to walk away, his heart breaking all over again. “I shouldn’t have come.”

taglist: @twancingyunhao​ @synthetickitsune​ @wonuziex​

[hyunjins-orange-slice-too]

Connected ch3

pairing: chan x reader

genre: hurt/comfort, fluff

word count: ~1.1k

warnings: feelings of depression

an: this is a repost from my recently deceased blog hyunjins-orange-slice. may she rest in peace.

masterlist * previous chapter * next chapter

you had finally slept through the night. no nightmares, no tears. and you only had chan to thank for that. his phone call from the day before left you feeling happy, downright giddy if you were honest. so sleep that night was a breeze.

now it’s the morning after and you wake up refreshed, and hungry for once. you find yourself in your kitchen to make some breakfast. the place is kind of trashed, cleaning isn’t at the top of your list when you’re depressed. but you actually had the energy to do something about it today. after a quick breakfast, you put on some music and got to work. a mixture of cleaning and dancing had you giggling and out a breath when your phone dinged.

“hey! how are you feeling today? did you get some rest? any nightmares?”

you pick up your phone, smiling at the screen.

“hey! i slept great actually. thanks to you. :)”

“i didn’t do anything though. ㅋㅋ”

“yes you did. your phone call was very comforting. i slept like a baby.”

“well my baby should sleep like a baby.”

“ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ”

“that was so cringe, im sorry. ㅋㅋㅋ”

you giggled. crizztopher at work again, but shy. he’s adorable.

“you’re so cute lol”

“am not.” he argues. “i’m about to go do a chans room. you gonna be there?”

you practically squealed with excitement.

“of course! opening youtube as we speak.”

it was so nice to see his face fill the screen. so nice to sit with him and listen to music. but it felt like it ended just as quickly as it started. but when you checked the time, it had been over an hour.

“stay, i’ve got to go now.” he said, and the chat immediately filled with different variations of ‘no don’t go!’

and you felt the same. no don’t go. but then you remembered that you had been talking to him outside of chans room. you felt you may need to pinch yourself to make sure it was real. a notification filled the top part of your screen. a message from chan. but he was still live..? why was he texting you during his live..? you opened the instagram app to check his message.

“are you still watching?”

what a strange message. i was watching, you thought. but i had to minimize the stream to read your message.

“yes~~” you quickly reply, then switch back to youtube.

“one last thing before i go,” he starts. and you sit up a little straighter. he’s peaked your interest. “i’m not supposed to say anything, so i’m not going to. buuuttttt…” he draws out and pauses for dramatic effect, giggling. “i may or may not be going to america soon..”

he then repeats his statement again in korean, but you couldn’t hear it. your jaw was on the floor. does he mean, like a tour? are all of the members coming? or just him? where exactly in america? you lived in the middle of nowhere, he definitely wasn’t coming anywhere close to you. the chat flooded with similar questions.

“that’s all i can say!” he laughs. “i’ll see you later.” his accent was so strong on the ‘later’ that your heart gave a squeeze. “thank you stays. thank you baby stays.” and the screen goes black. you immediately open instagram.

“CHRISTOPHER.”

“oh no ㅋㅋㅋ”

“not in all caps. ㅠㅠ”

“could you please elaborate on your previous statement?”

“i’m afraid i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“unrelated question: what large city is the closest to where you live?”

“why…?”

“just curious.”

“chan are you going on tour?”

“that’s classified.”

“ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ”

“*sigh* chicago. that’s the closest large city to me.”

“chicago. got it. i hear it’s windy there. maybe i should bring a jacket.”

“chaaaaann”

“quit teasing meeee.”

your phone suddenly started vibrating in your hand, another instagram call.

you pick up quickly. “hello?”

“ah that’s better.” you hear chans voice on the other end of the phone.

you smile. “what’s better?”

“better to hear you. instead of texting. i like the sound of your voice.”

you cheeks flame at his comment and you thank whatever god there is that this is a phone call and chan can’t actually see you.

“i.. i could say the same about you.” your voice is a little shaky, suddenly shy and still trying to recover after what he said.

“did you eat?” he asks suddenly.

“uh.. yeah. just had breakfast before your live stream.”

“good. you got a good nights sleep, and you had some food. pretty soon you won’t need me at all.” he says, chuckling.

you get the feeling that he’s kidding, but his comment makes you sad. is this his way of trying to get out of whatever relationship he has with you? is he tired of talking to you? does he feel obligated and this is the only way he sees out of that? ‘i will always need you’ you thought. but you were too scared to say that. did that sound pathetic? and even if it didn’t, would it make him feel like he had to continue to talk to you? of course you want to keep talking to him, but only if that’s what he wants too.

you could hear him typing on his keyboard, and the faint clicking of a mouse. “are you busy?” you ask him.

“i’m just getting ready to finish some things up before i head home.”

“oh okay.” you pause. “i.. i don’t want to keep you from your work. i should probably let you go.”

“i’m the one that called you.” he laughed. “you’re not keeping me from anything.”

you weren’t so sure if that was true. you felt like a burden again. like you were plaguing him with your presence. and suddenly, your bed was calling your name again.

“i think im going to go lay down actually..” you say.

“isn’t it like morning where you are?” he asks, confused.

“yeah, i’m just feeling tired again after doing some chores.” you come up with the excuse on the spot, and you feel like it’s a good one. but your tone of voice doesn’t sell the lie to him very well.

“okay..” you thought he sounded a little sad, but you were sure you imagined it. he has to be glad to be rid of you.

“bye chan.” you say quickly, and hang up before you could bother him any more.

taglist: @thinkingaboutlana @tamlinsfiddle (red means it wouldnt let me tag you. to be added or removed, just let me know.)

🚨reminder: this blog is 18+ only. i’ve been getting a lot of new followers (which i greatly appreciate) but if there’s no age identifier on your blog, i’m blocking you no questions asked. (for my own sanity and peace of mind.) ik some people don’t actually go to my page to read the warnings, so im going to start attaching a warning at the bottom of all my posts. thanks for understanding. 💕

[ryuichirou]

Replies

Hi again! More short replies. The majority is related to our latest posts, but not all of them…

About Azul/Jamil comic from yesterday:

Anonymous asked:

"Long live the king or whatever..." *sounds of an octopus tumbling down a flight of stairs*

Awww poor octopus~  I wonder if Azul’s octopus form suffers too if his human form breaks a couple of limbs 😭

thestarlightfae asked:

Rip Azul. What did Jamil do to him to make him sulk?

F in the chat for our boy Azul

To answer your question: not sure! I’d say that he just refused him for 1000th time, but Azul is surprisingly good at handling rejection from Jamil (it’s his “sure sure, keep playing hard to get” mentality). But then again, maybe Jamil really was too harsh this time…

About Ruggie and leonut:

thestarlightfae asked:

Omg! Ruggie is adorable with his leonut!!!!!

Anonymous asked:

I LOVE RUGGIE DRAWING SO MUCH HE SUCH A CUTIE PATOOTIE I ADORE THIS MAN ALWAYS

Wahhahqhwhhwhehehejkwskjs

Thank you so much!! <3 I am very happy you like him.

Ruggie is such a rare guest in our blog, but he really is adorable and deserves nothing but good things.

About the Jade/Vil massage comic:

Anonymous asked:

JADEVIL?! truly blessed to live in a time where I can see JadeVil

HHEHE YES I can’t believe we haven’t posted anything proper with them yet and didn’t even have a tag for them… this is a good ship 💪

Anonymous asked:

OMG, Ryu, you gave me a heart attack as soon I saw Jadevil on your feed!! I'm so happy you guys ship, too 🫶🏼 I love it, thanks for the food 🙏🏻

Please enjoy your food, Anon! Thank you so much for liking it!! <3

Both of the tweels have interesting dynamics with Vil, both separately and together, so I’m happy to explore Jade and Vil together hehe.

Anonymous asked:

Thank you for the women. They have me gnawing at the bars of my enclosure.

(related to stuff from our 🔑🔞 acc)

You are very welcome, Anon, and thank you so much for enjoying them!!! 😭 I feel a bit weird when I post nothing but girl smut for a long period of time, so it’s very encouraging and frankly amazing to see you getting feral over them lol

Anonymous asked:

Out of curiosity, were any of your other drawings inspired by asks you received?

To be honest, I can’t remember anything major… But I am very bad at remembering my own drawings, so maybe it’s just my memory thing.

Sometimes I get carried away when I write a reply and start thinking “damn this sounds fun” and then months later end up drawing it, completely forgetting that it was a hc from a list or something like that…

But also sometimes I draw a new ship and start remembering how Anon asked about this ship ages ago and I replied “nah don’t ship them” or “nothing against it but we don’t care much” back then lol I think it happened with Ace/Riddle and Trey/Vil, for example.

Anonymous asked:

[shroudswap anon] of course it's fine with me, if anything i'm honored! i would love to hear any ideas you have on it!! :] one aspect of it that i think about: do you think ortho would receive a subtle sort of... disdain from STYX? because idia is this once-in-a-lifetime genius, and ortho is just... above average. so who knows what idia would've made and been capable of if he hadnt died, and this whole thing WAS orthos idea.... this subtle air of "it should've been you" to rub it in. thots?

I’m happy to hear that, Anon! <3 I’ll definitely come back to this idea again once I figure out how I want to draw it.

Also oof, good question. I feel like Ortho would definitely feel like this is how people feel about him, like they would be nice to him and all, but him being worse than Idia is such a huge elephant in the room that no one could realistically ignore. There could probably be some people in S.T.Y.X. who genuinely blame Ortho for what’s happened with their precious prodigy, but the overall consensus would probably be that this was an accident, Ortho was still very young, and that they shouldn’t blame him. This is partially because Ortho is seemingly everyone’s little sunshine, and people would probably feel bad for him.

But! Once again, Ortho would absolutely feel like they just don’t truthfully express how they really feel about him. To him it’s 100% objective truth: it should’ve been him, and everyone knows that even if they act like they don’t agree. He doesn’t have as much to offer as Idia did and he can’t achieve half of the things Idia could have…

The angst just keeps getting more and more potent huh

Anonymous asked:

politely hands you the idea of the tweels nonconing epel…i’m also curious if you think azul would ever join in on the twins…playing…with someone in any way

Anonymous asked:

tweel x epel anon, i hope i’m not coming across as requesting anything i just want to share the idea sharing is caring

No worries, Anon, it does feel like you’re sharing, and I appreciate you sharing~ ;3

Epel is a very good victim for such a scenario; even know he knows that he shouldn’t do it, somehow he ends up fucking around and finding out… so the tweels could definitely play with him.  He would be a delightful little toy~

But when it comes to Azul, I feel like he would only be present if the whole thing was his idea initially + he is very interested in the victim. Otherwise to him it’s just his rabid hounds terrorizing a piece of meat to keep themselves entertained. It’s mostly their own business I think 🤔

[thunderroseses]

Neptune from the Royal Au (everything will be redone in digital art when I have more energy!)

HISTORY~

Neptune’s kingdom is known as the forever frozen kingdom, one forged from war and bloodshed from battles long gone, during the multiple wars they were under control of the Sun’s empire and any battle Sun got into so did they, meaning they very war torn for much of their history until the Great War that involved many of the Solar System kingdoms, Neptune was not welling to give up easily as they raised above all else to stay alive and keep their citizens safe.

Sun gave them their independence after this as they couldn’t keep their many colonies under control any long as Sun needed to focus on his own Kingdom.

Clothing~

Warmth is the upmost important as it is almost always snowing or cold out, so they wear multiple layers that keep them warm will also expressing their nation pride, on Neptune’s coat you can see their nation flower that is royal purple and fish, as they have a booming fishing industry (more on it later) underneath the coat is a pale white dress, to keep focus on the elaborate coat, it is light and flowing, as to make it easy to move and not weigh them down, the veil is to keep their head/ears warm and having a layer between her head and crown, as metal can get really cold.

For the braids it’s tradition from the start of their villages to have two braids with dark blue ribbons in their hair for the first daughter, while the other younger daughter wear light blue instead, it shows their maturity and wellness to serve their citizens and are passed down by their mother after they hit puberty, believing that is when they are mature enough to know the responsibility they are excepting by taking the ribbon, this is also a huge celebration that the girl are trained for since they were little.

Extra~

Neptunes kingdom has a lot of bright colours to keep their moods up in the cold weather, it also help other find their way between towns in case of storm comes in. Even if it’s cold out everyone is pretty happy and friendly for those brave enough to visit despite the cold.

They are mostly known as a ice fishing nation, which is how they get most of their fish since the ice makes it hard to fish normally, they sell the freshest and best tasting fish on the market right next to Earth (something she is not happy about lol) if anyone is brave enough to visit it’s for the sea food :)

Neptune has memory loss after part of a castle collapsed onto her during the war, she was only six at the time and has a long lasting consequences because of it, those being memory loss/trouble and phantom pain that strikes up sometime leaving her bedridden.

Uranus parents are the cause of the castle collapse and while they didn’t mean to hurt such a small child, it was collateral from the war effort, Neptune’s parents were wary of Neptune hanging with Uranus (this is long after the war) but lighted after they saw how much it helped with Neptune’s memory problems as well as making Neptune more social then she was before. Now the parents are more friendly with each other, often going over to Uranus nation a few times a year (Uranus would go over to Neptune’s but had health problems which are also consequence from the war more on it in Uranus section)

Neptune is very close with Uranus and they try to keep in touch via mail, she is not as close to the other gas giants but is friendly with them.

She doesn’t really know the rocky planets, maybe when she was younger but can no longer remember anything about them, same with Sun even if she was their ruler for years

I’m probably going to post Uranus’ next, I’ve been really enjoying making up stories for all the different kingdoms and what their kingdoms would be like, if anyone else want so join in I’ll be happy to share it and talk with them to bounce ideas off each other!

Here’s so extra drawing I’ve made, mostly for the villagers outfits



[kekstala]

hopping on the ask train 😻

I really adore your art style and I’m looking to improve because I’m not too fond of mine currently. How long have you been drawing and what are some tips you have to improve?

(Also how do you do your line art?? It’s always so scrumptious)

First of all, thank you so much! <3 It makes me really happy to hear that my art brings you so much joy!

I’ll continue to shower you guys with my stuff, because comments like yours make me walk the extra mile <3

 

Now to your questions!

 

„How long have you been drawing?“

 

Funnily enough, my whole life lol

Sure, that sounds pretty farfetch’d considering I’m a lv. 29 duck, but eh, I mean it.

One day I just took a pencil and started drawing, and that‘s about it.

You could say I've been improving my art since ever - I started drawing stuff that I saw on TV or in magazines as a kid - Pokemon and Digimon being two of the very first things that I used as a base to draw.

Back then, I only used to draw creatures or animals, since I practically sucked at drawing humans.

Only after I met one of my real life friends, I also started to draw humans - It‘s been approximately 13 years since then, so the process of mastering something‘s indeed quite slow.

My best advice on that topic: never give up.

Sure, there will be days where you think you may never improve, but this isn‘t the case - you just need some patience and determination to keep going.

With every picture you draw, you learn more, until you arrive at an actual point of understanding.

When you reach this certain point, drawing turns from a difficult chore to a fun ride full of wonder, where you only see the fun parts instead of the bad ones :)

 

Also fun fact: when I started drawing humans, I preferred females over males - since women are much more curvy and „easier“ to draw for beginners.

Now it‘s the exact opposite - It‘s a walk in a park for me to draw men…woman instead… oh boi

I always sweat when I draw Carmine or Juliana LOL

Kieran and Drayton on the other hand - easy xD

 

„What are some tips you have to improve?“

 

1. Like I said before: never give up.

Drawing‘s like mastering a skill - you need time to improve.

I‘m the perfect example since it took me over 25 years before I reached a point that I‘m satisfied with. And even now, I’m still improving - it‘s an endless road without a certain goal, and you have to decide for yourself whenever you want to run or walk.

 

2. Take breaks

No seriously, I mean it, your body AND your mind need some, since they can influence your perspective and decisions.

When you draw and get more and more frustated with yourself and the picutre, it's, in most cases, time for a break.

Staring at one picture for hours can narrow your perspective. Perhaps you‘re even tired because of a lack of sleep, maybe even hungry - all these factors can influence you negatively, because your body‘s at war with your mind - its quite a psychological topic, but it plays a big role when you draw.

Drawing steals a lot of time and concentration - and with this concentration being interputed by needs like hunger or sleep, your body and mind won‘t focus anymore on one thing but instead on a lot of (in that case) obstacles.

Result -> your concentration weakens, and you get frustated because you did that one pencil stroke like a dozen times already and are still looking like crap! The WHOLE picture looks like crap! You really SUCK at drawing!

In this case, just take a break.

Eat something, do other stuff, or just go to get some sleep. After a few hours away from the picture, you will be surprised that all these negative emotions and thoughts you had before are in fact gone, and the picture doesn‘t look that hideous anymore.

 

3. Repeat what you draw

This one sounds simple but makes quite the impression later on.

By repeating the same thing over and over, your brain starts to save certain important parts, and it becomes much easier later on.

My example‘s Kieran - I’ve drawn this dude like a dozen times already - at first I had to use a character sheet as a base  because my mind hadn‘t saved some certain points yet, so I had to look it up.

By looking something up, you get interrupted in your concentration and fall out of the „flow of drawing“.

It‘s the same when drawing something new. You’re not used to it yet - hence, it's, in most cases, more difficult than something you've already had some experience with.

Since I‘m already used to drawing Kieran, I don‘t need to look stuff up anymore, I just draw him and move on. (this sounds so mean, I‘m sorry Kiki D: )

 

4. Look for references

I usually do this when I take a break from drawing. Just open Twitter (or X) or Tumblr and watch other artists do their stuff.

Of course, this‘s like a double-edged sword, since it COULD influence you negatively, especially when you are just down from not finishing an art piece.

But it can also help you improve where you’ve struggled before.

Like before, the best example��s Kieran lol

Since the release of the DLC people have drawn him A LOT - which is great because there’s like a dozen references you can use for your own benefit.

And don’t assume that people just drew him in one go perfectly - they had to master the process I already described before by repeating it over and over.

How fast they have mastered the way to draw him depends on the person themselves; some people choose to run the road while others choose to walk instead.

The artwork you see may be the result of 100 pictures before that had to build the base for it to truly shine.

You only see the result but not the way there, so don’t feel dishearted and think you may never arrive at their level - everyone had to start from scratch after all. :)

 

5. Draw stuff you enjoy

It’s the most important advice I can give - the four before depend on the person themselves, whether to follow them or not.

Every person works differently and does stuff differently - but almost everyone has one thing in common when they draw - they draw because they love what they do.

And thats the most important part: draw stuff you truly enjoy - it makes you happy, and that's what counts in the end :)

 

“How do you do your line art?”

 

To be honest, I’m far from satisfied with my way to draw linearts, but I’m happy that you guys seem to like them that much by showing interest :D

 

Applin’s here to help you understand the process a bit better <3

 

1. The rough sketch

Every artwork begins with a sketch - the sketch doesn’t need to look good or anything, just a quick reminder of what I wanted to draw in the first place.

 

2. The rough first lining

It’s the first step in the direction I want to go with the picture.

Like the sketch, it still looks very rough, but it already shapes the object or person I want to picture here.

 

3. The second lining

This one works as a bridge between “the rough first lining” and “the final lining”.

It looks like the end goal, but it needs some fine tuning or minor changes to be perfect.

 

4. The final lining

Like the title says, it's the finished linearts that show the object or person I wanted to picture in the first place.

To be honest, between Parts 3 and 4, a lot of stuff can happen, depending on whether I need to redo some part of the artwork or need some extra steps in between (like a third or fourth lining part)

 

5. Some extras

Because the lining itself looks so bland, I usually add some little details as well.

It’s more or less optional, but it makes the artwork look more lively. ( at least from my perspective, lol )

 

And that’s about it :D

 

I hope I can help you a little bit with my advice and wild rambling (I’m known for it after all kekeke)

 

Thank you so much for your ask, and have a wonderful day <3

And hopefully a lot of fun while drawing ;9

[aiura-stan]

Onto the first volume proper: volume 0, of course!!

First of all, Aso sensei’s note is so cute. I love how he says he’s been expressionless the entire time, but he really is happy. Relatable.

Aaaaaand the cover image of Saiki sure is interesting. what’s with the pipe?? I seem to remember it being a reference to another work of his somehow.

Also, volume zero announcement Saiki is very cute. His expression reminds me of a cat.

Even from the first oneshot to volume zero, you can see how much Aso sensei’s artistic abilities have improved.

That said, baby Saiki still looks very strange… I can’t overemphasize how much he improved as an artist over the course of Saiki k in drawing human characters looking natural, in pose and their clothing, expressions, etc.

I like that volume 0 Saiki’s father actually kind of looks like him. Ah… well maybe it would all be a little too real if Saiki’s family resembled him a little more. It would certainly be less whimsical. Imagine Kuniharu having black hair. Imagine Kuusuke *not* being a blonde. That would be more uncomfortable somehow. I’m glad Asou sensei made up the thing about anime hair being a result of Saiki’s powers.

More examples of why Kusuo thinks people are terribly insincere… using the most extreme of unsavory unstated thoughts.

And here we get a slightly more liberal estimate of how much time it would take for a normal person to go insane… three days instead of three hours. I think Asou sensei likes the number three, since later on he mentions that it would take Saiki three days to destroy the world if he really wanted to.

Here we have the first frontal closeup of the Saiki Scowl, after he explains the hassle of telepathy. Really, I think it’s the most taxing power on him, mentally, for obvious reasons. It really is cool that Asou sensei was able to make a “surly” character like Saiki into such an interesting protagonist. (Mostly because he’s well written.) He’s definitely not a typical manga protagonist, but he functions very nicely in his (comedic) straight man role.

Also can I just say this is one of my favorite panels of Saiki in the entire manga, and it’s not even part of the series proper… Yes, why did he, Saiki? I also want to know… I can see why this was left out of volume one. It’s not funny exactly (maybe in a kind of dark way) but god. Baby Saiki saying this tugs at my heart strings.

Head always full of thoughts of the intelligence agency organization that kidnapped him at age four… that he erased, along with the unnamed nation…

good grief.

Kuusuke would have been six at this time; maybe old enough to help with the coverup so something like that didn’t become world news. Or maybe young Saiki just decided to use mind control, since he didn’t have any compunctions about that at the time.

I dislike a Nendou with readable thoughts, or a Nendou called a “violent, foul mouthed delinquent” instead of an idiot.

That said, I really like this Saiki side eye… it’s a thoroughly Saiki expression.

LOL. Nendou would be me in the situation though. If so many people accuse you of something that you didn’t do, it’s hard not to doubt yourself a little, right?

Yeah, we get a pretty good picture of Saiki’s pretty rational moral compass. Someone like Nendou definitely deserves it, but even so, he shouldn’t be punished for a crime he didn’t commit in Saiki’s eyes. Especially when the heinous perpetrator is right there all along.

Also, Takahashi’s (saiki-caused hallucination) angel counterpart looks just like him, but female. Interesting.

That Saiki can manipulate someone like this by altering their moral compass sure is something. Makes me think of this post.

Lastly and certainly not least, Saiki isn’t escaping the gay allegations even in volume zero… lol. That’s a priceless facial expression. “This power is useless except for getting idiots to like you” smh, so unappreciative of the new friend, Saiki. XD

That will do it for vol. 0-1!

I’ll be back tomorrow for 0-2.

[uncreativeuser27]

Hello! I haven’t posted anything for…a while now lmao but I HAVE been drawing. So, allow me to dump all my art in this post so I can disappear off the face of the Earth again because composing a good post is too much effort for my pathetic brain to handle /hj

I’ll try to put them in order of when they were made, but I’ll also group them into categories. The date as well as my signature can be found on all of the drawings (if you care lol)

This is a drawing I did for a friend of mine. It’s his original character, Mad Snake. Normally, I don’t like taking requests, but I genuinely enjoyed drawing this guy, so I didn’t mind it. He was a step out of my comfort zone, and I liked how he turned out!

Now, the Jaiden pieces! The first one was my idea that Jaiden started performing for Las Casualonas (but, like, as a singer or stage personality. She never actually did anything spicy). I also thought she and Melissa could have a really funny dynamic. Like some sort of rivalry for the audience’s attention/love.

The second picture, as it obviously states, is what I headcannon Jaiden looks like working for the federation. I had fun with her scythe (and if you pay close attention, you can see a little something in the reflection:])

And the third one is of Jaiden stretching w/ her wings. It’s also the most recent of this entire batch. Basically, I finally came up with a way that I liked to draw wings and had a sketch in my sketchbook of that pose, so I drew Jaiden. Her shirt intentionally comes down low in the back to make space for the wings, and her hands are out of frame because I didn’t want to draw them. Also, that one only took me about 2 and a half hours, where most of the other took from 6-8 hours, so…lol

The next pieces are an original work from 8th grade an the redraw two years later. It was an assignment that we had to read a novel and then make a trailer for it. I asked to make a drawing instead, and thus, this creation was born.

I changed a little bit, like putting two of the characters in the trees instead of a fading color behind them. Overall, they both took me three days and I’m really happy about how the redraw turned out.

This is Imp. Yes, he looks like SomethingElseYT, but I don’t care. I love him, and I was already attatched when I realized. I made a whole spread in my sketchbook for him (I ran out of images, so I didn’t include it here. Maybe another day) Also he serves no purpose other than being something I can doodle on random things and places. He doesn’t even have hands

This next one is a self-portrait in an outfit that I really liked! The original had my full name, but I blurred it for the sake of not wanting my full name on the internet (I’ve probably screwed up somewhere, but at least I’m trying :’)

And this last one is meant to be part of a collection, but I only made for Kenny. I want to draw all of the main four in South Park as teens, but I haven’t been able to think of poses and stuff for the others. It willl happen one day, but for now have this I guess

So, yeah. That was all the art that I wanted to share but haven’t had the motivation to actually put together posts for all of them. Hope you enjoyed my little display lmao

You probably won’t see for the next, like, couple of months because I’m really bad at posting. So, take this as my going away gift :D

[yurababy]

you’re a whole constellation; l.jh (teaser)

lee jihoon x afab!reader, will be smut, part of the Don’t Listen in Secret series! can be read alone or w/ the other members’ (as of 11/22, cheol & han) 

synopsis woozi’s new studio looks a bit too perfect for his liking. he has no idea what to write for his next song, but he has a thought on how to make his new space a bit more homely.

➤ happy bday. ⭐️🍰 wrote this on a whim. title from “nasty” by ariana grande bc jihoon has recommended it before. refer to pics of the universe factory if u don’t know what it looks like. he publically showed his new studio november 2021 for reference. not proofread i’ll do it later! universe factory is unbelievably gorgeous so i needed to do this. expect finished fic sometime around friday to next friday LOL mb </3

-

“holy shit, ji,” you said as a heel clicked against the hard floor upon entering the room. a chuckle was more exhaled than laughed beside you, and if you weren’t busy admiring the setting, you’d see a suddenly shy woozi scratching his neck.

“i like it so much,” he admitted, trailing behind your wandering figure. “i’m so excited to work in here.”

universe factory couldn’t have been executed more perfectly than this. the purple-pink LED lights through the area with a small corner designated to a warm yellow glow, the surprising prism with drawings plastered on each side, and the ceiling.

you felt like a little kid peering through a telescope, wide eyed at the invisible celestials. the nebula and twinkling stars scattered on top were more reminiscent to an old trend of galaxy-print than a NASA sighting. but, as you turned to jihoon for the first time since entering his new studio, you found the stars in his prideful eyes. in that moment, he was sparkling.

“it looks like how to you sounds. i love that. i’m really,” you grinned harder as your vision was suddenly becoming blurry. “wow,” you turned your attention to something down, something to conceal the drama of your happiness. “i’m really proud of you.”

he was fixing the positions of some figurines on shelves ever-so-slightly, if you thought about it more it seemed like he was distracting himself the same way you were. he was never one to get emotional. “thank you. i am too… i just need to fill it with music now.”

your interest piqued at that. it was always so exciting to see how in the zone woozi was while creating music, but also, how his mind worked. his abilities never failed to astonish you— it was so hot how he just hummed a random melody and it would then be the chorus of a number one title track. he was nothing less than a genius.

“y/n?”

since when was he standing in front of you?

you blinked once, then twice. “yeah?”

you watched his eyes squint and the corners of his lips tug upwards, but you didn’t comment. did he have a thermostat? he should get one. the room is hot, the air feels thick. maybe you can buy him one of those hand-held fans. maybe you can fan him while he composes.

“i asked if you wanted to help. like, now, just casually.”

definitely casually, you thought, but the furrow of your eyebrows was made evident to jihoon. “i mean,” he continued, an eyebrow of his own raised, “maybe you’ll have some kind of fresh idea. new studio, new sound?”

“oh.” did he want you to sing? to play an instrument? this was woozi, what could you do that he couldn’t? “i’m not sure how i could possibly help you make a song, but sure,” you smiled. you’ll figure it out, probably, and why wouldn’t you want to spend some time with jihoon?

“trust me, you can help me in more ways than you can imagine. we’ll make a song like the kpop industry has never seen before.”

that had you holding back a scoff— what hadn’t the kpop industry seen? woozi likes it when people are honest around him. you decided to share your confusion out loud.

it only earned a wider grin from the boy who was making his way towards his long sofa. you followed in suit, taking note of the mirror right in front, taking up the full length of the wall, and his piano to the right of the mirror. the brief wonder of why such a large mirror was in his studio was held back from being verbally expressed when your earlier question received comment from the boy who had sat on the soft ivory.

for someone of jihoon’s stature, his hands were truly suprisingly large. his veins exposed themselves as nimble fingers spun a pencil in one hand, the other setting aside a notepad. he still held his smile, exhaling a bit dramatically as he patted the space on the cushions beside him, inviting you. “a while ago, the kpop industry hadn’t seen a 13 member group, a 23-year-old among the top KOMCA members... i’m sure we could figure something out.”

༺♡༻

taglist @zen003xx @seung-sungs @angelwonie @rubyreduji @vvsmydiamonds127 @shualicious @whyokoa @dreamhannies @313hwa @minnie-mouser22 @knucklesdeepmingi @lenireads @oolanderr @bestboysvt @misssugarlips @whereisgyu @kodzukein @i4kt @wonushuasworld  @aurumness @bibinnieposts @venusprada​ @ikissvernon  @listxn​ @starlight-nightz​ @svtrbi​ 

[lostcrossing]

SO.

This is @spoofaloofa's sideblog for their newest and probably most niche project in the world: recreating the entirety of the Island from Lost in Animal Crossing!!

This project was made on nothing but spontaneous whim. Enjoy!

Tag rundown:

#The Island.jpg = Includes screenshots from The Island

#The Island.gif = Includes gifs from The Island

#The Island.mp4 = Includes videos from The Island

#The Island.txt = Textpost

THE PLAN

gets regularly updated

more under the cut (Warning: batshit insane rambling. this is in no way organised.)

Okay lets do this shit

*cue The Eyeland*

PART 1 - The Bare, Bare Bones

23/6/2024

Okay so I have a very general idea of what kind of stuff I’m going for so far.

The entrance is going to be the bamboo forest that we see Jack waking up in during the Pilot episode. Ofc imma put the tennis shoes there too 🗣️‼️‼️

The path’ll kinda curve to either the left or right side of the beach (maybe both?) and then BAM. BEACH.

I honestly don’t know what I’m gonna use for the fuselage. I might find something later tho lol

And there’ll be like, tent items and allat there’ll be an actual tent that has a bunch of medical supplies and magazines and stuff in it when you go inside of it. Cause guess what?? THAT TENT IS GONNA BE SAWYER’SSSS RAHH and another actual tent thats SAYID’S TENT THING THAT HE SET UP FOR SHANNON cause he was SO like… he was so… omg theres no word to describe how MMMPH that was it was just so AUGH

And just before the fuselage the bamboo will shift into normal trees and there’ll be a couple nooks and crannies you can sift upwards through to get to the pascal flats that lead to… THE BARRACKS!! I’ll add the pylons too ofc (which will not be very good for my character since he’s supposed to be Mikhail 😭)

and oh boy. oh boy oh boy the BARRACKS are where its at omg. This is where all the villager houses are going to be!! And do not even get me started on the AMOUNT OF ITEMS THAT PERFECTLY FIT THE BARRACKS. IS ABSOLUTELY INSANE. ITS SO CRAZYYYYYAHHHHHH

there’ll be 2 exits to The Barracks: One thats like a dedicated path to the Submarine Dock (which leads to the actual dock in game!) and a hedge thing off to the left of the barracks with a semi hidden gap in it, similar to the bushes that Sayid, Locke, Danielle and Kate peeked through whilst trying to “rescue” Jack from the others. This will lead to the Pneumatic tube dump, and reenter the Pascal flats.

24/6/2024

Okay last night I went feral and kind of made a scrappy plan in the whatsapp draw thing whilst trying to explain what I mean to one of my friends

I’ll put this into the Happy Island Designer sometime later 💀

30/6/2024

sorry guys i blacked out and woke up with 35 nook miles tickets. I am going villager hunting

LIST SO FAR

- Klaus (Polar bear vibes. Would go for Tutu but I feel like she’s too happy to be on The Island 😭😭)

- Boris (He’s a boar. what more can I say)

- Roscoe (As Kate’s horse. Also cause Roscoe is one of my all time faves lol)

- Goldie (Vincent!!!)

- Punchy (Nadia, cat version. He’s the closest I can get to her tbh 😭 I would have chosen Lolly but her expression is too cute to fit Nadia)

- Ruby (As Chester! At least I think that’s what Ben’s rabbit is called? not too sure.)

- Peck (He kinda looks like a Eurasian tree sparrow and since those are like literally everywhere it could technically be an island animal. idk I got him in the 3 plots part of the storyline and I just want to keep him 😭)

[longhands-the-second]

First thoughts on Trimax volume 1

1-

I appreciate eriks. Just like, generally. I love how scruffy he is lol.

I do wonder if he’d let his hair grow out like that if he wasn’t in hiding??? He’s had the same haircut since he was a kid though so idk. He’s very attached to his whole look, it seems.

2-

When and how did he replace his prosthetic? What was that like?

WHAT A FUCKING DUMBASS I LOVE HIM

YES INDEED, THAT WAS “FUCKIN STUPID” (Wolfwood says fuck guys omg good for him he deserves it)

I laughed out loud for real though I definitely woke up my roommate on accident oops

Oh god the hair. It’s fuckinh coming. The gut punch. (<- does not know the specifics)

Seeing him with the stubble AND the normal hair is doing something bad to my brain. Fix it. It doesn’t compute.

3-

THE GORLS!!!!

Her hair is. Not exactly bad but that’s not my Meryl.

New Miami, huh? I’m so excited to get absolutely no elaboration on this ever.

Shoutout to the little dude on page 84 who looks like fuckin Wallace

Oh. My god. How many times did he just get shot

OH MY GOD GOOD FOR THEM. God I love milly

Wolfwood is such a chickenshit.

4-

I wonder if Vash has conceptualized himself as human up to this point, and where he’s at with that now?

DAMN I wish I was that balanced

I uh. Man. Wow. I kind of want to make fun of him for doing the most Anime Shit Ever

[redacted]

Babygirl i promise you he knows how plants work lmao

Y’all really weren’t joking about the panty shots

Brad is ALSO a shit. We can’t win here.

Oh. My question is being answered. I don’t like it very much.

On the face of it, I'm pretty solidly in Nico's corner here.

5-

I love how clearly i can hear his little song in my head.

He’s full in monke mode. Just an absolute ape.

AGAIN WITH THE CROTCH SHOTS

love that nightow definitely just got sick of drawing the bullet holes in the coat

Actually looking at this a little harder he did simplify a lot of details. Good refinement, though i do miss the belts.

Vash who the fuck are you calling old. Is the old man in the room with us right now? (Yes)

6-

Oh fucking hell.

I wonder how vash looks at humanity specifically . Is it really something familial? Or is that changing as we progress? I do see how he could be operating from that angle.

My other real question is just how old is he, like, mentally? He really does seem to have the mindset of somebody in his 20s. Knives too? Maybe that’s a thing with them, but i’ll hold off on saying anything conclusive until later. Maybe i’m too quick to say they’re both immature.

I’m sorry it genuinely makes me happy to see characters swear like real people. Wolfwood is so much more fun here.

~~~

I hate that I'm going to get through these so much quicker now, especially now that i’m especially hooked. I’m genuinely considering reading ahead but i think i’ll explode if i do. Time will tell.

I may not get around to coloring pages in the next two weeks and just go absolutely hog wild once my class is over. I have to make my own damn comic for once lmao. Ofc i have 0 impulse control so who knows.

[feebleturtleduck-artz]

Some more Scooby-Doo throawback art! And some extremely old art to boot lol. This is my first Scooby-Doo OC, that isn’t directly related to the main gang, since most of my current OCS are of some direct relation.

Meet Jay! The first image was drawn ‎June ‎13, ‎2011. I was only 10 when I drew it! How time flies. For some reason, his name was Abasi. According to the original description of the image, he wasn’t even a Scooby-Doo character, but because he was a great dane I decided to make him one apparently lol. His name was Abasi for some reason. That might literally be something in Swahili, which would make sense because I drew nothing but Lion King lions back then.

I...don’t know why I assumed Abasi would be a good name for a Scooby-Doo dog but whatever. He was Scooby-Doo’s brother in that image.

Second image was drawn ‎September ‎02, ‎2012. So a little bit over a year later. This was when he was first renamed to Jay. Still more in line with the SD style. Now sporting his own Scooby-Doo collar! It reads “Jay” though. I really like how he looks in this style; I think he looks rather cute, innocent and dippy. It also reminds me of the later style I used in my “Pool party” and “Scooby and Amber’s puppies” image.

The third image was drawn on December ‎08, ‎2012. This one was referenced directly from Clipart of Scooby-Doo himself. Maybe I can find it sometime and redraw it LOL. This one looks...rather terrible  I remember being really happy with it at the time as it was the closest I was able to get to SD style at the time. I’m still kinda happy with it LOL! It was a land mark for me of learning a different style. Return of the one sided whiskers! I couldn’t ever get SD’s eyes close enough together without looking weird, and I still can’t :’)

Annnnddd the fourth and last image was drawn on ‎December ‎23, ‎2012. Featuring his own, Casandra, who is a literal recolor. And by literal recolor, I mean the first image I ever did of her I traced a screenshot of Daphne and used it to get a color palette down. I never posted it online though lol and I still have it. Even her appearance is still a hodge-podge of the other gang members for some reason. Casandra is literally blonde Daphne, with the smarts of Velma(and Freddy’s hair, now that I think of it) she’s wearing the Ankh necklace from Scooby-Doo In Where’s My Mummy. Maybe not the SAME one but a Ankh necklace because I was obsessed with Egyptian culture at the time. I believe she also ate a lot of food like Shaggy lmao. What a mess!

The letter she is holding is the same one from Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! Season 1, episode 2 "Hassle in the Castle". I think the photo on the wall is well....

Her backstory was she was a die-hard fan-girl of the gang and wanted to join them. She also owned Jay, who was changed to be Scooby-Doo’s cousin rather than brother at some point. She would solve a few mysteries herself, but would mostly wander around and get lost as she was kinda dense. She was well meaning but would walk into a clearly marked chasm if someone didn’t stop her. Jay wasn’t much better, outside of having a exceptional sense of smell. I remember her favorite SD member was Shaggy, who she hung out with sometimes. It’s strange, if I had made her today I’d probably had considered them a couple, but Shaggy and her never were a couple lol. I just wanted to draw them being freinds!

I definitely need to remake them sometime! I think I’ll make Jay a realllllllllllllllllllly distant cousin of Scooby. Or maybe just a fan-boy! He looks like he could maybe be Scooby-Dee’s son with someone. But that would just be another bright-eyed-nephew to look up to Scooby. I’ll probably change him to be unrelated.

[daiziesssart]

Hey, @daiziesssart

I just want to say that I’m in LOVE with the way you draw Lily. Honestly, you have such incredible talent and the amount of details that you put into each drawing, it always leaves me speechless! I’m so happy that you share your talent, I hope you know that you have such a beautiful talent. 🥺

If you don’t mind me asking, how long does each drawing take? Not just time-wise, but also do you have an idea in mind when you begin the drawing? Or do you get ideas in the middle and switch up the piece you are currently working on?

I hope you are doing well ❤️

OH MY GOODNESS THIS IS SO SWEET??? this message was like the writing equivalent of a warm hug i’m going to be thinking about it forever

gonna put this under a read more because honestly this got so long and i do not know how that happened i am so sorry?????? omg

i absolutely don’t mind!! to be honest, my art process is SO chaotic and unorganized, which is a direct reflection of my brain, lol. sometimes i get ideas and i’ll be drawing them in the same day, and other times what i post is an idea that i’ve had cooking in my noggin for awhile and finally managed to draw it (although it seems like the ones that i draw immediately when they come to mind perform a lot better, so maybe there’s something to be said about not overthinking an idea and just draw it pfff) just as an example, these ones are ideas i drew in the same day, whereas this one was Marinating in my noggin for awhile

i’m also a HUGE perfectionist, to the point where me tweaking and overcorrecting is a majority of my time spent on my art, lol. like i’ll be 90% of the way finished with an art piece, find something i suddenly Hate and then i redraw that entire thing. and then usually i end up realizing that i was just imagining things from staring at my own art for too long and then change it back to how it was originally LOLOL (i do this almost every time) that being said, i feel like i’m a pretty slow artist bc of that which is something i’m trying to work on!! sometimes i’ll even finish something, hate how it looks and start it completely from scratch lol

i do tend to switch sometimes! i have crazy adhd so i’m usually Super Focused on whatever i’m currently working on, but if i’m not liking how it’s turning out, i’ll start a new idea and come back to that one later (maybe) (i have so many unfinished jily wips) (help me)

(most of my jily wips are wips because most of my ideas are definitely suited better for writing and i have not written a fanfic since i was 14 and writing fanfiction for victorious and icarly)

THANK U SO MUCH FOR BEING SO SWEET MWAH