#May post a different version of this later idk

[retro-ghostingreen]

Leave me alone I'm doing hot gay shit (building a true affront to God)

[burinazar]

(post contains mia s2 spoilers and also may be semi incoherent i've been brought low by 4am belaf and vueko feels and must exorcise them like demons to sleep and have spammed the ganja server enough today already)

belaf and vueko are thematic opposites but in a complementary manner, not an oppositional manner. her big symbolism thing is darkness, and his is sight, which requires light/visibility, the opposite of darkness -- but there is no clash between these ideas as they manifest between the two. instead he encourages her to look INTO the dark. he understands the dark is a safe and warm thing for her. his quest for a revelation through gazing with determination and fondness isn't meant to cast a searing light into it or tear it away.

and Vueko so values what she finds when she looks into the darkness that she dies with those words on her lips, thinking about two things: how much she loves Irumyuui, and how grateful she is for Belaf’s words about gazing fiercely into that dark, the act of which led Vueko to her.

[shmooseee]

My preliminary headcanon's for Jason's face over time:

Explanations and uncensored version below the cut:

TW: gore

1.Jaybin

Headcanon that once Jay was living with Bruce and Alfred, he got a lot of baby fat on his face- he has wavy curly hair in my head. Teal eyes - very smiley.

2. Jaybin :(

No way that explosion and building collapsing didn't do some physical damage. In this the skin below his eye has been torn and ripped open, it was ripped to the bone - and his left cheekbone was fractured- I also imagine tears around his forehead and back of his skull from the crowbar - but kind of hidden by his hair. Also his hair was frizzled by the explosion and smoke.

3. Post revival - pre-utrh

I was gonna draw him at his revival but forgot :( -might draw this later but I imagine his mortician reconstructed his face - and since it was a closed casket funeral it didn't have to be super clean. His skin was kept together with staples -

post revival- in his time in the hospital catatonic, it healed super wonky and (based on my own surgical scars) it keloided in some areas and sunk in in some others - and because he wasn't able to treat them- they're super tough and pull at his skin and don't fade properly to white like they should. The scars from the staples are still there. The scar is also a little shiny where it keloided- idk why but my scars do it in certain lighting.

His face is a lot more masculine and older but it still has a decent amount of baby fat (he's still super young). This is about 2 years post revival so hes around 17 - very recently after his time in the pit. (I feel like 15-17 for a lot of kids has huge body and face changes so imagine mentally 15 yr old Jason suddenly so grown- might revise this to make him more baby looking)

The white hairs just begun to grow - i kept the baby curls because of course i did.

I bounce between whether or not the pit healed his scars or not because I find both so compelling- but as an artist i like drawing cool scars more.

4. Post-utrd

His face is a bit more defined again. - now featuring the batarang scar. I haven't put to much though into his other face scars yet so these may change yet again.

His scar has faded slightly but it still tugs on his face massively - it won't go white. He cant smile without it tugging uncomfortably- sometimes even hurting. He smirks like a loser instead. He frowns as his resting face both because hes a bitch but also because of the position of the scar.

Featuring the batarang scar yayyyyyyy- i also headcanon that the doesn't treat it correctly (do you think he has time to massage it and moisturize that many times a day??) so it tugs every time he turns his head.

The white hair has fully grown out and he got a haircut.

I also did one for his body scars - and one for arkham knight jason but i want to redo them with a little more research - quick preview of that though - arkham knight - dealing with the effects of undernourishment from his childhood and from his year with the joker - only grew to about 5'3. And mainline jason that didn't die grew to about 5'6. Will do a comprehensive headcanon list for different universe jays.

[zechiki]

I am never finishing this but I like the idea so I am posting it anyway

Context: Crescent is looking into an alternative universe where someone is living the life he wishes was his

Crescent belongs to @lunnar-chan

Some lore stuff below

Don't know If I'll end up doing anything with this in the future so I am just gonna ramble about it here

I know very little about him but my version of this little guy lives a sad life, being neglected by both his parents. He was an accident, Nightmare and Killer mainly just tolerate his existence and do the bare minimum. This makes him feel very unwanted and sad. He is a bit jaded but mostly a sad boio

Idk he was born to two guys in a toxic relationship-

I got this idea of him where he finds a mirror that shows him something he wishes was his. The mirror shows him a world where someone is adored and loved by different versions of his parents. Lives a happy life that he could never have. He is envious of what they have and just watches, imagining himself in those moments.

I don't know for sure but he may have also been able to talk to the person on the other side when they were near it or something. In my plot that someone would be Luna-Moon. They become friends :)

She calls him big brother-

anyway

I think It gets broken at somepoint, either by Nightmare or his own accident, idk it just gets broken

something something Crescent gets mad and pieces the mirror back together and uses magic on it to go through to the other universe, probably.

There he meets up with Luna who happily introduces him to her family and Crescent is a bit cautious and unsure about the whole thing, only to be pretty much accepted and then he'd cry.

It's supposed to be some wholesome stuff mainly :D

I'll see if I end up doing more with this later on. Though have this one extra thingy.

Haha, I am evil

[lokh]

what do you think toshiro's version of laios would've been like if he was still with the group during the shapeshifter shenanigans

there have been a few speculations in the tag and among the fans and they are all very good SO i am going to take this opportunity to insert a bit of my shipping bias as i like in my interpretation LMAO agdsfgdfgv

i noted that in actuality shuro seems to have a very good grasp on laios' character??? this is most obvious in the manga later on but even seeing how he criticises laios in their fight... iirc nothing he says is actually untrue or wildly exaggerated, and while he does express frustration over something he feels like laios Should have control over (noticing his cues), he is also aware that laios isnt being malicious and that hes Just Like That. what i mean to say is that while i think his version of laios may seem more pushy and in-your-face, i dont think it will be overwhelmingly so. if its post-fight, i think the idea of laios (and marcille) being willing to do anything to get falin back made a big impression on him, as well as the idea that they need to eat and rest in order to succeed in their goals, so those aspects would be prominent in his version. he seems pretty observant, so i think for the most part the physical traits would line up, but i think there would be specific things that stand out to him that would appear strangely striking on his version of laios (like. idk something about his eye colour or the subtle contrast of his armour and chainmail. he seems to have a weird sense of aesthetics if extras are anything to go by lmao). if hed actually been paying attention all those times laios had gone on about what the hell ever, then it might be even MORE hard to tell apart his version since he would also have a good grasp on what laios should know. so either his version of laios is pretty difficult to pick out, OR despite the character being accurate his appearance is too. stylised lmao (exaggerated features or something) OR!! they just get him to pull out his monster gourmet guide thing and are able to tell from there. iirc everyone was surprised at its appearance so its possible toshiro had also never seen it before

IN MY IMAGINARY SHIPPING SCENARIO............ lets say that his laios isnt able to be picked out immediately and that the monster guide thing also doesnt immediately occur to anyone. what the real laios Specifically notices is how close this other laios keeps getting to shuro. and hes like. ??? why is he getting so close to him, theres no way i get that close to him??? but no one else seems to be picking up on it as weird, so hes having a small crisis like do i REALLY get that close to him???? and now that hes on the outside he notices shuro subtly leaning away and he feels both a wave of shame and..... protectiveness??? (JEALOUSY??????) and he immediately steps in and grabs him like Hey!!! cant you see hes uncomfortable???? weve been through this already!!! and like. ok i cant believe im doing this again but i need to separate this into different endings

a) the whump route: i dont think shuro ever envisioned Actually Telling laios about his frustrations outside of being basically cornered into it. has he ever spoken up against what was expected of him?? has he ever been confrontational???? i think part of what held him back from expressing his frustrations, along with the cultural norms, could be fear of what the reaction would be. if he had done the same in any other aspect of his life (his family, his inheritance), i think he would expect disappointment, disapproval, more proof that he doesnt add up to expectation. to be honest i dont think he Truly believes that laios is the type of person to react like this. but it was strong enough to prevent him from acting and i think would be projected onto his image of laios. maybe fake!laios says something dismissive like Well if it really bothered him hed say something right? what, he cant even stand up for himself? cmon, shuro, prove that you cant handle it just like everything else. and thats pretty much the fastest giveaway that it isnt really laios. of course this would be a HUGE tonal departure from what the actual episode/chapter was, so:

b) the dumbass route: both laioses break into fisticuffs, and, yes.... barking. and so they speedrun the entire encounter as the shapeshifters true form appears and, after laios points out that thinking too hard about others versions of you can tear apart groups and peace of mind, they pointedly do not speak of it again. they think about it though. a LOT

c) the normal route: both laioses argue normal like and the group ends up being able to tell them apart because the fake laios goes on a little too long about how theyre all here for falin and everyones like ok its not like he DOESNT love his sister but.......... the rest of the scenario probably goes like canon, though then i would want to see what everyone Else thought of shuro

[kamiversee]

The F*ck List (semi-official) Breakdown.

The following was submitted by my lovely ☃️anon, & I needed to make this it’s own post given how long it is, my replies & clarifications are written in between this breakdown & theory (Ex: A/N > Etc.). 

Here, you’ll find majority of details you may have missed & maybe even more to think about. Enjoy :)

(wc; 5.7k) (content; spoilers ofc)

holy shit Kami. i literally had to take the entire day to process everything. before anything else, i need you to know that you've created an absolute masterpiece. TFL was the first fic i ever cared to keep up with and it has set the bar impossibly high for any other writer out there. please take your time with TFL 2, i'm so excited to read your other work!! also a break sounds like it would be so good for your mind considering how long you've dedicated yourself to this story 😭😭😭 you're seriously impressive. heads up, i didn't proofread this at all bc i finished typing this at 4 am LMFAO so forgive me if it's all scrambled and makes no sense.

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A/N > Thank you for taking the time to write this breakdown, I seriously appreciate it so I wanted to take my time in responding to it & engaging with you :)

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now, on to the yap. i deadass cracked my knuckles before typing all this out.

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A/N > You’re so real for tht ngl

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i reread the entirety of TFL from chapter 1 and my brain is so melted from analyzing that i'll prob find more details tomorrow after i sleep on some theories 😭 BUT HOLY FUCK YOU REALLY WEREN'T KIDDING WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE HINTING AT GOJO'S OBSESSION SINCE LITERALLY THE FIRST CHAPTER??? the fucking hint being that "Gojo's desire for you is so strong it's almost frightening." GIRLLLLLL 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵

your foreshadowing and referencing is insane. idk if you intended a lot of it, but a lot of it caught my eye.

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A/N> I TOLD YOU GUYS IVE BEEN DOIN IT SINCE THE FIRST CHAPTER !! Okay not exactly but like there was a vibe I had from the first chapter & when I later came up with the twist & went back and saw that everything would connect perfectly ^.^

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chapter 7; the reader and Gojo have lighthearted banter about how the reader "started this" situation.

"I made a mistake." [reader] 

"A good one." 

"Bad one." You correct.

this was regarding a completely different situation but it baffled me how much it connects to the plot itself; the reader making the "mistake" of leaving her door open, and how it lead to months full of trauma and love. probably completely unintentional, but such a good detail.

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A/N > Very intentional btw, it’s supposed to be known that, in a sense, Gojo x reader is forbidden :)

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Choso's still staring at you intently, "What version of you would someone not like?" 

The way he words his question only furthers that little feeling in your chest. It's almost as though he were implying that any and all versions of you would be acceptable in his eyes. - Chapter 16

THE WAY WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT CHOSO WOULD STICK BY US REGARDLESSSSSSSS AAAAAA WE'RE SO BLIND!!! i just hope this stays true to the sequel :')

"No, I wish you didn't have to hate me." He says, shutting his eyes again and sucking in a deep breath, "B-But... it's uh, It's okay. I can live with you hating me." - Chapter 21

AAAA WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!!!! WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS WAS FORESHADOWING OUR FUTURE WITHOUT GOJO 😭😭😭 how he can live with the idea of the reader hating him so long as she's happy with Choso, especially considering his later revelations of how twisted his actions were and how if you stuck with him, he'd view you differently. fuck.

You despise the fact that he loves you. To you, it's almost entitled for him to feel like he has that right. How dare he hold such a strong emotion for you? If he felt this way, why is he forcing you to sleep with people for him? It makes no sense. 

Why would someone claim to love you and put you through so much? 

If he's been in love with you all this time, why start the list in the first place? Why couldn't he have just tried to win your heart from the beginning? Why the list? Why the blackmail? You don't understand him. - Chapter 23

i'm crushed. we didn't understand because we didn't know that Sukuna was involved. that could mean a million other things. i have some far-fetched theories about this but hear me out later!!!

the entirety of chapter 23 had me fucking floored while i was rereading. THE FORESHADOWING WAS EVERYWHERE!!! EVERY FUCKING WHERE

"No sweetheart, Sukuna's an asshole but..." His expression flickers and his smile fades away. He swallows and then clears his throat, "I'm pretty sure he'll satisfy you just fine." 

...

You narrow your eyes at him, "Are you sure?" 

...

 "Fuckin' positive," Gojo suddenly sounds pissed and you grow concerned. The arm around you gets a little tighter while he walks you through some crowds and you keep looking at the man confused. 

There's a vein popping out along his jawline because of how hard he's gritting his teeth.

of course he's aggravated because he knows that Sukuna is the one behind the list in the first place 😭😭😭 I'M SORRY WE DOUBTED YOU SATORU, FUCKKKK

——FIFTEEN MINUTES. That was the exact amount of time it took you to seduce Sukuna. The act was way too easy. Actually, it was suspiciously easy.

BECAUSE HE FUCKING KNEW 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

"What all did you plan on doing tonight aside from getting harassed by strangers?" Sukuna suddenly questions against your skin. 

You ignore how close he is and the way his lips make you tense, turning your head to face forward. Chuckling at his last comment, "Same thing as everyone else here." You reply, slightly confused by his question. 

"Bullshit," He utters, "Nobody dresses like this without the intent of gaining my attention," Sukuna claims while his hands slide back down along your body.

this 100% could be just him being cocky and Sukuna, but the recent reveal just makes this feel like an extra demeaning interaction. but of course, it's Sukuna.

chapter 24 is so fucking shady too with everything we know. i know you addressed some of these points already bc i brought them up in previous anon messages, but these things still had me paranoid;

the way Sukuna leaves us and tells the reader to go to his room after a certain amount of time (i know he could have just been tidying up real quick but everything about this man has me on edge)

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A/N> A lot of people are on edge about this but I’ll be honest, there’s nothing crazy that happens in between this time period. Not saying nothing happens but nothing crazy— it’ll be addressed later (in the next fic most likely)

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the way he's been consistently on the phone since the reader entered the room, which is shortly after she messaged Gojo saying that she'll be able to cross Sukuna off of this list by tonight which he wasn't happy with at all.

no seriously, he kept diverting his attention to something in the bathroom and then came out, still on his phone. maybe he's talking to literally anyone else but STILL I'M PARANOID

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A/N> This is to show the fact that Sukuna is a very socially active individual, & hints to the theory (I think you later state) that he has connections.

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this happens in chapter 25 but the way he keeps smiling while the reader kisses him is just so smug of him especially considering the original reason as to why the reader's even interacting with him

then the spicy chapters with Sukuna…

the foreshadowing that the lack of knowledge of Sukuna's reputation will come back to bite her in the ass; first with the knowledge that he is abusive, and then her finding out that he is the curator of the list, knowing the full details of her blackmail and even threatening her again.

WHO DID HE FUCKING FIGHT HELPPPPP MY MIND IS BOGGLING there's no way it's Gojo, right? they're both too unscathed in these next few chapters for there to have been a fight between the two of them.

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A/N > It’s not Gojo. 🙏

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THE FUCKING MOMENT WHERE HE CONTEMPLATED SOMETHING WITH THE PHONE IN HIS HAND??? I FUCKING KNEW IT. I FUCKING CALLED IT WAS SOMETHING SHADY AS HELL.

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A/N> The other Sukuna hint I was talking about is right before this moment btw, you’re welcome ;)

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then he has the audacity to hold his tongue right afterwards?? it's such a big hint towards the fact that he knew about the list from the beginning UGHHHHHHHH.

the way he tried to humor the reader about her "job" even though he was in on the whole thing. UGH. SUKUNA WHEN I GET YOU SUKUNA?? 👊👊👊👊 especially with that "whore" joke right afterwards. i can't stand him. i know that it's implied that he has a twisted view on women from having abusive women in his life (his mom and his ex who he punched) BUT STILL. he's so lucky he's fictional and hot.

the fact that we're able to pick up on the fact that it's a "crazy coincidence" that he continues the whore jokes UGHHHHH HE HAS BEEN PLAYING US FROM THE STAAAAAARTT

Gojo got upset at something from Sukuna's party, he didn't want you to call yourself a whore all of a sudden, Sukuna seems to have believed that was your actual job, and you remember how pissed Gojo seemed as he thought about you sleeping with Sukuna- 

Holy fuck. Are the two connected somehow? Is something going on? What does Gojo owe Sukuna? Does Sukuna know you only slept with him as payment to clear Gojo's debt? Is-

GIRL YOU WERE ALMOST THERE!!!! YOU ALMOST HAD IT!!!

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A/N > I love teasing in my narration by nearly spoiling things 😹

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seriously though, these chapters killed me. the official end obliterated my heart. it's so fucking bittersweet i want to scream at the top of a high building. the reader ends up happy and with someone she loves, which is fantastic for her. she deserves that after everything she went through. Choso treats her so, so well.

but Gojo. with the theories i have, i feel horrible. i was so harsh towards him as a die hard Choso girly but these endings changed me. i just hope i'm right.

the fact that his healing journey is harsher than ours makes this ending sting so much. he's healed, and you can see it with his demeanor from the call and the way he interacted with the reader.

we were always made aware of the way he looked at us such deep attachment. the initial gleam shows that he's happy to see us, but that he's not reliant on us for his happiness anymore. he's finding that on his own, and it's a grueling process for him. i wished the reader gave him a hug, but that would probably make me feel even worse.

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A/N> He gave her a lil side hug (with his arm over her shoulder) & was resting his head on hers at the end if that makes you feel any better 😅

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"Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start." i'm gonna throw up bro i'm so sad. i'm proud of his growth. his obsession was so, so strong but he always prioritized the reader's happiness over himself. i know that being self-sacrificial is so core to his personality but it doesn't make it suck any less. i'm devastated. i started blasting mitski in the car on my way to work after reading this.

i thought i was ready for the journal burning. i was so ready for this tie to be severed, for them to finally move on. but i failed to realize that it could ultimately mean a life without each other. it makes sense as to why, but it still sucks.

kami i need that poly ending before i cry my eyes out at 4 am rn. you know i can't handle angst, but bittersweet endings lowkey hurt me even more. i need all my babies to be happy. i desperately need it.

but that alt ending... fuck. in a horrible, sick, and twisted way, i'm relieved. i'm a Choso girly from the bottom of my heart but i can't let this Gojo go omfg. even if he shows up for one more chapter, i think i'll be alright. BUT IT BETTER NOT BE FOR DEATH KAMI!!!! I HAVE A FEW EXCERPTS THAT SUGGEST DEATH FLAGS BUT I AM SIMPLY NOT LOOKING AT THEM. DON'T DO THIS TO ME KAMIIIIIII. i need this boy to be frolicking in a field of flowers or something. my heart can't take this.

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A/N> I know I reference death a lot but that’s just to add a sense of how dramatic the characters are 🫶

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okay, time for my mind-fucky theory. pls bare with me. if it wasn't obvious by my last post, i'm 100% on board with the theory that Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo, which started this whole thing. but the thing that is getting me is how this all connects. i have some assumptions that could make sense, but there are a handful of gaps. here's my thought process;

Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo by using his obsession/love against him.

we are already familiar with the fact that Gojo has liked the reader for years. there was a chapter where Gojo mentioned that it started off as a "crush" but he was so oblivious to his own obsession up until the reader mentioned it to him. it's to the point that he didn't understand what was wrong with the idea of hurting people for the reader. who's to say that Sukuna didn't catch him in some sort of heinous act regarding the reader like stalking?

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A/N > You’re cooking with this one and I almost, almost had to go get the fire extinguisher :D

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Gojo didn't understand the difference between love and obsession until later on in the story. this would be consistent with the implication that Gojo just loved her so deeply that his morals were askew as we have yet to find out how far his love goes.

what if Sukuna caught him in the act of doing god knows what, and brought up the fact that if the reader found out about this, that she'd get super freaked out and would do everything she can to get away from him (considering probably barely knew each other, if at all, at this point). but why would Sukuna devise such a plan over a money bribe? well, Sukuna's already revealed to be wealthy, and maybe he was bored. the same line that Gojo kept repeating to the reader whenever she questioned him as to why he did it. what if Gojo asked Sukuna why he's blackmailing him, and he said the exact same thing; "I was bored." we see how much Sukuna mirrors Gojo's speech by calling the reader "sweetheart" often, what if Gojo did the same thing? 

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A/N > Gojo & Sukuna do have a few parallels in this story & they will be addressed more in the sequel.

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we wondered in chapter 23 how Gojo reaches out to these men to ensure their debt is "paid," but considering how oblivious everyone else on the list is to Gojo owing them anything, it would make sense that he only reports to Sukuna as he is ordered to do so. but two things stumped me on this theory overall.

the reader said that she used to party a lot and get involved with boys before Gojo. if he was stalking her for so long, why did he wait so long to approach her?

what specifically would be the blackmail that Sukuna has on Gojo?

regarding the first point, it's been mentioned that Gojo has been "scared of women" and was shy when it came to approaching the reader. he knew of her for so long, but was able to constantly slip under her radar. considering how much of a pervert he is, it wouldn't have been surprising for him to sneak around and watch in on the reader hooking up with other guys. after all, these guys were probably complete strangers to him and all he cared about was you. remember how Gojo was basically able to tune out his own best friend, Suguru, when the reader was hooking up with him in their living room? it wouldn't be wild to assume that he was able to do the same for your other hookups as he spied on you.

to connect this with second point, what if Sukuna caught Gojo being a peeping tom on the reader during a party hook-up? while being so distracted in the act of spying, Sukuna spots him. the reader wouldn't be alright with the fact that someone who's barely an acquaintance (if that, depending on the time this occurred) to her has been perving around and watching her have sex without her consent. she would do anything to get away from Gojo, and of course that would crush him. Gojo tried to buy Sukuna's silence by any means necessary. so, Sukuna generated a list of people that he and Gojo mutually knew for the reader to fuck. the reasoning for it would be the fact that Gojo has to sit through the process of having the girl he likes fuck a bunch of guys besides him, and the fact that Gojo knew all these men would make it sting more. plus, he has a reputation for hookups. (chapter 8)

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A/N > You’re like RIGHT there with it and yet not there at the same time omg 😟

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but why would Gojo agree to this deal with Sukuna, and why would he also go with the method of blackmailing the reader? it's basically a guarantee that the reader would be scared away regardless. but again, we could recall that Shoko mentioned that he was too "scared of women" to approach the reader at first. this was his chance to finally approach her. plus, "once that video is gone, there is no excuse he'll have to be around you." (chapter 8)

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but the more i thought of this reasoning for the two points, the more bizarre it felt. so what if instead of Gojo being a peeping tom, it was Sukuna. we get so many hints that Sukuna has eyes and intel everywhere. we get an indirect implication of this when he called us out for rolling our eyes during our phone call with him. yes, it could be completely by chance, but it's still a great hint that he "sees everything" and "knows everything." we get an even bigger hint towards this in the alt ending when he directly references The F*ck List.

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A/N > Others have taken note of how Sukuna knew she rolled her eyes but trust me, that’s just to show that Sukuna knows the reader’s body language more than he’s let on & paid attention to her a lot during the time they were together. 

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it wouldn't be too far fetched to assume that he has some shady videos taken of people without his consent, some possibly acquired through other people (like how Gojo was revealed to have sent Sukuna the video of the reader from the first chapter). what if Gojo caught Sukuna with the video, threatened him to delete it, and Sukuna counterthreatened to have it be sent and posted everywhere. it would be highly ironic, but consistent with the way that Gojo and Sukuna practically mirror each other at times. the reasoning for the list choices would still be the same for this theory, too.

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my citations for these theories ☝️🤓

“You once asked me if I love you because I blackmailed you or if I blackmailed you because I love you and my answer is both,” Gojo confesses as he turns to meet your gaze, “Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start.” - Chapter 56

loved you from the start; his obsession has been consistent from the start (supports Gojo being a peeping tom theory) or he has always had a deep concern for you (supports him wanting to stop Sukuna from spreading blackmail of you instead).

“I’ve sacrificed everything for you, y’know.” 

“How? What’s everything that you’ve sacrificed, hm?” 

“You. I sacrificed the woman I love to make her happy.” Gojo admits, and of all he’s said thus far, that feels like the truest statement. 

“I could’ve been happy with you.” You remind him. 

He laughs, “Yeah well, I’m an idiot.” 

You scoff, “That’s all you have to say?” 

“Yup.” - Chapter 56

is he an idiot for being a peeping pervert instead of just approaching you normally? maybe. how does this make her happy? she ends up finding love through Choso, through the list, through the blackmail.

But deleting the video means ... he has no more leverage over you and can't force you to help him with the hole he's dug for himself. -  Chapter 8

the hole being the blackmail set against him by Sukuna.

Gojo's behind you cursing at himself for being unable to tell you the truth. 

He's so scared that you'll never help him without the blackmail and, well, he has every right to be because you're pretty sure that if it weren't for those videos he has over your head, you wouldn't be doing any of this. - Chapter 9

the videos he's referencing is the original video from chapter 1 and the fake video he lied about with Suguru, but he can't tell the reader the truth because it's too twisted and risky (supports Gojo peeping tom theory).

He silences himself in thought. There are so many ways he could go about answering such a question but the possibilities of how you may react are endless. Plus, you're drunk and if he's going to admit or explain anything to you, it'll be while you're sober. 

"Because..." Gojo's voice gets so quiet that you almost don't catch what he says, "...I don't have any other choice." - Chapter 21

if he didn't go through with his list, Sukuna would have went through with Gojo's blackmail, thus resulting in either you getting as far away from Gojo as soon as possible or Sukuna's video being sent around.

He let something slip abruptly, "W-Wish I c-could tell you everything, sweets..." 

Your brows furrow at that. 

Are you missing something here? - Chapter 22

YES GIRL!!!! SUKUNA'S BEHIND THE WHOLE LIST, HE'S BEHIND THE BLACKMAIL GIRLYPOP

"Anything," Gojo says, meeting your gaze. He's so serious that it's almost dark the way he looks at you, "I'd do anything for you." - Chapter 29

"I meant it when I said I'd do anything for you." 

You follow his motions and then end up right back in his arms, "Right..." 

"I'd sacrifice the very thing I love just to see you happy." Gojo claims proudly. 

You scoff, "Thought' I was the thing you loved?" 

"You are." 

His words bewilder you, "Then that makes no sense." 

"It won't." Gojo shrugs. - Chapter 29

🧍‍♀️

anything. even if it means putting your body, heart, mind, and career on the line. directly supports the theory that Sukuna initially had blackmail on the reader.

"We're the same, y'know..." He suddenly says, his voice breaking again, "We both want someone so terribly bad but our situations prohibit us from getting that person." 

"You could've prevented all this though..." 

Gojo sniffles and you feel a drop of wetness slide down his cheek and slip against your palm. The man was crying? Why? - Chapter 30

this whole time we've been told that Gojo and the reader share more similarities than the reader realizes. what Gojo is to the reader, the reader is to Choso. while Choso now knows of the men that the reader slept with, he doesn't know why. he doesn't know about you being blackmailed. you know that you had to sleep with these men. you don't know why. you didn't know it was because of Gojo being blackmailed.

"For loving me, Satoru. It's not a crime," You say, mocking a comment he made to you earlier, "You're allowed to love me. So, for that, and that only, I forgive you." 

Those words healed so many more wounds in his heart than you realized. It was like that was all he ever needed to hear. If Gojo's mistake was loving you and that's what caused this, then you forgive him. 

If in some twisted way, his feelings started the list, you forgive him.

COME ON NOW.

There’s so much going unspoken but the two of you knew what either was saying, you understood each other more than either of you realized. - Chapter 35

“Well,” Gojo sighs heavily and then draws your hands off his face, leaning down to you a bit, “Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made in exchange for one’s happiness.” 

“Are you telling me that all this was for the greater good?” You quiz as you raise a curious brow. 

“Something like that, yeah,” He shrugs. - Chapter 45

You tell him, “If I had one wish, it’d be that you did that from the beginning.” 

Gojo opens his mouth to say something but then he swallows his words down. He nearly fucked up. 

“All you had to do was talk to me,” Your shoulders raise into a shrug as you move a hand to the doorknob, “Things could’ve been different if you did.” 

“Even if I’ve been obsessed with you since the beginning?” He questions and he’s stepping closer to you again. He can’t possibly wrap his head around that possibility- 

You laugh a bit, “Especially if you were obsessed from the beginning,” You didn’t know it but that statement right there made the man feel as though his world was falling apart, loads of regret tumbling over him as he stares at you with wide eyes, “Satoru I think you forgot but, before all this started, aside from Shoko… I was lonely.” 

Gojo’s throat goes dry and he fails to form a response to that, “I…” 

“If you had just talked to me one time, and more than a hey or how are you,” The way your eyes soften, a slim sheer gloss of tears coating your gaze as you speak to him, “I would’ve fallen for you.” 

He grits his teeth, “Don’t tell me that.” 

“But it’s true.” You say. 

And just like that, Gojo was crumbling all over again. If only you knew how much he regretted everything after hearing you say that. - Chapter 46

if he had just spoke to the reader before all of this, maybe she wouldn't have gone to those parties, hooked up with those people, and caused whatever kind of blackmail Sukuna had on Gojo (or on her).

He wishes he could take it all back, his feelings for you included. If only he could go back and stop himself from ever being curious about you. That’s what started it after all. Because, at the end of the day, Gojo knew who you were before you knew who he was— hell, even before Shoko knew who you were. - Chapter 53

then what is the timeline of his obsession starting? has it been before Gojo? could his blackmail have taken place even before Shoko introduced you two, adding to the weight of the threat that Sukuna held over Gojo's head (regarding the peeping tom theory).

┏━━━

A/N > The timeline on Gojo’s interest, not obsession just yet, on the reader will be addressed in the sequel so this’ll be answered there <3

┗━━━

---

but there were certain parts that stumped me and my theories so i have some weird reasonings around them;

It's selfish of him and seriously fucked up but, he's said it before and he'll say it over and over again-- you're all he has. He made promises to everyone on that list, promises of delivering a woman to them at some point, and of course, he couldn't convince anyone he knew to do such a thing. 

So again, the situation with you just happened to be a coincidence. 

The problem is that Gojo hates that it's you. He hates that you're the one he ended up doing this to. - Chapter 8

Gojo's known to be a silly guy so it could make sense that he actually did promise these guys hookups for reasons unrelated to his blackmail. after all, he does have a reputation for getting people hookups. the coincidence is that Sukuna now has dirt on Gojo and wants to toy with him. by making the reader sleep with them the guys he coincidentally owes hookups to, he fulfills his role/reputation and relieves his debt at the same time. two birds, one stone.

┏━━━

A/N > As we later learn that some of the “debt” Satoru claimed to have isn’t real, we can also infer that his reputation & the promises he’s made to these men were done out of coincidence. Take Toji for example; tell me you can’t see an interaction between him & Gojo where Gojo gets a bad grade and wants to get it up so he taunts his professor with the idea of getting him a hookup & Toji would laugh it off considering Gojo’s reputation ;)

┗━━━

another thing that stumped me is why Gojo got so worked up with the reader referring herself as a whore, and the connection to Sukuna. my delulu reasoning is that once Sukuna threatened Gojo with blackmail by either of the two theories/methods i mentioned, Sukuna casually referred to the reader as a whore. that caused a major fight between the two, possibly even getting physical (which can refer back to the implication that Gojo has hurt people for the reader).

the fight could have increased the tension and severity of the situation, so Sukuna decides to add Choso to the list knowing how easily attached Choso gets. in chapter 5, the reader and Gojo were discussing the list and Choso specifically. Gojo was even noted to be relieved when the reader had mentioned that they'll just have to hope that Choso doesn't get attached, as he obviously holds deep feelings for the reader. Sukuna knows that by going through with the blackmail with Choso involved, Gojo most likely will not end up with the reader if Choso get attached and the reader reciprocates those feelings.

also, the counterargument that Sukuna and Gojo are actually friends/allies in this situation just doesn't sit well with me. it would make for a crazy twist but it just feels too out of character for Gojo. but then again, how would Sukuna specifically know about The F*ck List? but idk, it just feels so wrong to me. maybe i have too much faith in Gojo lmfao. after all, he has consistently shown a great dislike towards the guy since chapter 23. but maybe it's my denial speaking. i really don't want to think of Satoru going through this whole arc only for it to reveal that he truly is a piece of shit. pls don't do this to my pookie my heart cannot handle it </3

┏━━━

A/N > Remember, Gojo is a good actor & you go a long period of time in the book not realizing he’s not as much of a villain as he pretends to be 😉 

┗━━━

there's that moment after the reader fucked Sukuna that still messes with my brain. with my theories, my brain's thinking that he contemplated on collecting even more blackmail on the reader. for what reason? idk, to be an ass? to torment Gojo further and add more to his blackmail? but maybe he decided not to because he already has plenty of blackmail on the reader (if the theory of Sukuna having a video of her from way back then is true) and fucking her knowingly made Gojo pissed considering all the dirt Sukuna has.

so why can't Gojo tell her the truth now? why does he want to wait years in advance? maybe he's hoping that by that time, not only will you forget and not care about the situation overall, but maybe Sukuna will forget all about it as well. the chances of Sukuna holding on to the reader's blackmail for that long is slim and the reader would most likely be in a situation where she is completely separated from Sukuna depending on her job and living situation with Choso. the stakes are lower than if he were to reveal everything to you now, at a moment where your life is still so uncertain. it would go against his wish for you to end up happy.

┏━━━

A/N > Maybe Gojo doesn’t tell her the truth because he can’t, just as he said 🌚 Perhaps he’s not allowed to yet. After all, why would Sukuna even tell the reader he made the list in the end? ^.^ Just some food for thought!

┗━━━

---

regarding the future of TFL... fuck, bro. i have no fucking idea. i'm too caught up in the (presumed) past. i'm mourning fr. i love this fic sooooo fucking much. whenever you decide to pick up on the sequel, i will be there. if you choose to publish anything else in the meantime, i will be there. thanks for such a fun and memorable read, Kami. i'm excited to bookbind this soon 🤍🤍🤍 now, i need to watch blue lock to shove these feelings down.

yap fin (for now)

-☃️

A/N > I love you sosoosooooo much for this. These theories are like reading an entirely new fanfic sometimes except, I know all the answers & what’s going to happen next, which only makes me more excited ^.^ Thank you for taking the time to make this, thank you for reading, thank you for supporting, just, THANK YOU.

This right here is exactly what I write for; people like you :)

To the others reading this breakdown & theory, thank ☃️anon because she’s a damn godsend & ilhsm ^.^ (definitely showing favoritism rn, sorry not sorry, ily all I swear)

Edit; Since you’re watching Blue Lock, I can’t wait to bring my Shidou fanfic here because a lot of the drama in TFL has inspo from that fic, which I wrote first ^.^ & I could totally see you enjoying it because not only is it a childhood friends to lovers than enemies & back to lovers troupe BUT it also includes Itoshi Sae x reader which ofc, adds hella drama :))

P.S. It’s two am as I finally post this and omg sorry it took me a while, I wanted to answer other anons first before unpacking this badboy, again, tysm!!

[prettyoddfever]

re: the Fever-era stage gay routines

I'm integrating a previous post into this one so I can cover all of the pre-split years and everything in one place. Again, I'm iffy on the term "stage gay" but idk how else to describe it so here we go.

So Brendon said this quote in 2018: "For our first headline tour I would go up to Ryan our guitar player, and like kiss him on the neck or kiss him on the mouth and he would be so mad. I was like, I just want to kiss you bro."

Ignoring all history & precedent of the way that Brendon tends to exaggerate for effect and often goes for the general idea & how he feels at the moment when looking back rather than actual specific facts... he's still talking about the band's first headlining tour in April 2006. And yeah, that's the only season where I think this quote MIGHT be plausible. If the situation actually played out exactly as Brendon says, then of course that's not ok. But you still can't project that scenario onto literally every part of the Fever era or form your entire perception of a whole era (or an entire work relationship) off of one single interview quote from years later. That's going to leave you with an incredibly distorted understanding of the band's dynamics with each other & fans, Ryan's input and stage presence, and what's actually going on in the pictures you're looking at. Like people are clearly missing so much context if they're able to look at a picture of the IWSNT mic-sharing from summer 2006 and think that it was one-sided sexual harassment (or some kind of actual Ryden thing).

THE EARLY MONTHS

So the guys weren’t super close onstage in late 2005… they were mostly trying to figure out how to even be onstage lol. They watched the bands they were touring with and learned as they went. You could almost see little pieces of each band’s influence show up for a while. Brendon totally modeled himself after Jason Vena in early fall 2005, and then he had clearly been watching William Beckett closely in early 2006 (that influence carried on throughout the year). It was also interesting to watch Brendon navigate what he thought fans wanted or expected when he was an 18-year-old boy thrown into an international spotlight with girls (and boys) screaming “f— me!” at him (one example). It really looked like he learned to play into a role (this is included). And I mean that in terms of being a popular frontman. That’s not even taking into consideration the actual way that Brendon needed to adopt a persona onstage throughout the whole Fever era. Look at the type of songs he had to sing. Both Brendon & Ryan talked a lot in 2005-2006 about how Brendon needed to get into a character onstage to deliver the risque lyrics.

The types of halfhearted moves that Brendon started to make on Ryan by the end of the Truckstops & Statelines tour looked like he was just following the example of bands he’d been watching on tour. Brendon started making bigger moves on Ryan in April once P!ATD had to step up their game for their first headlining tour (which happened 8 months after they played their first show ever). That UK tour had some shows that were bigger than the first half of the summer tour in North America. There were times in 2006 when I felt like P!ATD was more of a UK band than American partially because of how intense the frenzy was over there.

Brendon was still testing different stage personas and figuring things out during this season, and the band still felt like 4 separate guys trying to find their footing. They were talented & good, but there was absolutely a huge shift in the band itself once Jon arrived in May. They finally felt like a strong united group. They went back to their practice space for a while in May to figure out the details of what they wanted their band to be like onstage, rehearse with their two new touring musicians + Lucent Dossier, and re-learn updated versions of their songs. The last half of the Fever era was polished and very intentional... they felt like a different band by June in many ways.

THE SUMMER TOUR

I thought this seemed like the picture that really got the Ryden craze going in summer 2006 (before fans had totally decided on the “Ryden” name – some were saying “Bryan”). It was taken a few days into the summer tour:

There were a ton of new fans arriving during the summer tour, so that picture formed some first impressions. By this summer many fans would basically only ask people to describe the moments when Ryan & Brendon came near each other at a show and every look they shared. People who went to shows would mention how at different points they saw one of the four guys suppress a laugh when the crowd would positively scream if Brendon & Ryan came within two feet of each other.

The Panic guys were well aware of what their fans wanted and what was being said online (for better or worse). Yes, they got annoyed during the last half of the year when fans took things too far or were focused more on Ryden stuff than the music, but it seemed like they also wanted to have fun with a fanbase that they were being increasingly distanced from as they became more & more famous. There were quite a few stories of Brendon and Ryan playing up the Ryden angle at meet & greets throughout the last half of 2006 to make fans laugh or freak out (and Ryan initiated some of that, so it wasn’t purely Brendon). There's more in this post.

The point is that the shows in this tour were very intentional and felt more like watching a theater show than the type of band who interacted with their audience (which was a huge fan complaint this season tbh). Ryan was more confident & comfortable onstage with his new makeup, was actively engaging in mic sharing and playing into what the crowds obviously wanted to see, and seemed like he was largely in control of how the shows would go even if he still sometimes shied away from attention in general onstage.

Ryan & Brendon did continue some of their antics at random international shows in August & October, but it kind of seemed to depend on the audience. Those shows were also a different vibe from the national tours.

NOTHING RHYMES WITH CIRCUS

This season was on a whole other level, so here's a separate post that goes into important detail!!

^^^ seriously, please read.

The creepy leering character that Brendon was playing during the NRWC tour is obviously not his actual personality, nor his typical onstage character for the whole Fever era (although I did see hints of it return during the 2008 Halloween show when Brendon was in his vampire costume lol).

AFTER THE FEVER ERA

The band played a handful of regular shows in 2007 like any other band. They wore jeans and dropped the stage gay & makeup because those elements were part of the Fever-era shows and that era was done now.

Ryan did try to instigate parts of their former routine at the first show in 2007 before the band had found their new direction, though.

Brendon kissed Ryan on the cheek at Bamboozle 2007 when wishing him a happy birthday.

The Pretty. Odd. era was completely different on so many levels. Ryan & Jon largely ran those shows and the new music didn’t require a dramatic frontman in an entertainer/narrator role anymore. Ryan was WAY more confident onstage and would often stroll over to mess with Brendon or share his mic. Ryan was the one who often instigated any interaction. Jon even slapped Brendon’s butt at some shows. A lot of fans would claim that Ryan kissed Brendon’s cheek, but in hindsight I think it’s more likely that he was whispering to Brendon and knew that fans would get overly excited. Also, the moment where Brendon kissed Ryan’s cheek before Mad as Rabbits at Glastonbury was definitely not the norm.

ABOUT THE ROUTINE "RYDEN" MOMENTS IN 2008 (not on the same level as 2006, but still pandering to what fans wanted).

COMMON FEVER ERA MOMENTS

a few examples...

MISC. THOUGHTS

The point of this post is to show that the endless pictures that some people might share of "Ryden" moments or "Brendon sexually harassing Ryan" are often like the same points of the same songs on different nights, or just taken out of context of the actual Fever era. To be clear, I’m not attempting to excuse/explain every single thing Brendon ever did in this post, or attempting to speak for Ryan... idk what he was comfortable with or everything that went down between them.

However, I do think that people who assume Brendon forced Ryan into anything (in any aspect of the band) don’t understand their work relationship or the pre-split band’s dynamics & who had the power. That band was waaaay different than the one that Brendon had in later years. Back then he wasn’t really in a position to pressure Ryan into anything creatively-speaking (more info here). Ryan was shy in interviews, but he was in no way a pushover within the band… and to assume something like that kind of discredits his massive contributions. With the amount of control that Ryan had, I just really don’t think he would have let something so prominent get worked into the shows if he wasn’t ok with it in the first place (let alone instigate it himself sometimes).

Ryan talked a lot in the pre-split years about how he really wanted to challenge fans, push boundaries, do something different, shake things up, and keep experimenting instead of settling into a rut of what was comfortable/familiar. In a Danish interview in October 2006 he said "we do not want to be a safe band, neither with our songs nor our shows."

I thought the stage gay element seemed to loosely fit into those goals & ideas. But at the same time, I don't think it was ever that defined. It felt like it was just a random fun thing & wasn't that deep. Spin asked Ryan if he and Brendon were toying with the idea of bisexuality, which was a bit annoying because their antics obviously weren't that legit or a Serious Statement. I liked Ryan's answer:

[ivoryand-gold]

Epic The Musical Reaction: Thunder Saga ⛈️⚡️⛈️⚡️⛈️⚡️

SO many thoughts and feelings after the Troy & Cyclops Sagas (Jorge’s Version) and THUNDER SAGA. this is a LONG one, but i’ve put what i can put into words, so here my initial 24 hour-post release reaction! Spoilers galore ahead!

TROY

THE HORSE AND THE INFANT

the ensemble is *chef’s kiss*

i love how gentle Jay’s voice is when he’s singing “penelope” and “telemachus”

the battle clashing is so good!!

overall Luke’s voice is a little softer and feels less thunderous than og so i wonder if that was to contrast thunder bringer? not a complaint just an interesting choice!

don’t love the change to “i don’t think you’re ready” but the rest of zeus’ part is gorgeous

he sounds like a kid pleading, making thunder bringer even sadder when he does it again later 😭😭😭

JUST A MAN

instrumental has a chokehold on me and Jay’s vocals are so smooth

“the view” drop is a lovely choice

😭😭😭 “who’s fighting for his life” 😭😭😭

THE STRINGSSSSSS

od’s first “im just a man” being so soft and now in comparison to eurylochus’ version is devastating

FULL SPEED AHEAD

i like how Jay’s voice starts soft and builds power as he’s shaking the guilt of the infant in order to lead his men again

Armando is just so solid. truly the most consistent and solid vocals, which is perfect for the purpose his character serves in the first act of the story

i love every once in a while Jorge makes a surprising pronunciation choice that just tickles me

there were a few specific lines i was worried would lose their magic but “you and i’ll go ahead” still sounds perfect

again, ensemble is eatinggg

OPEN ARMS

Steven stuck out so much to me for some reason. more so when i listened on my tv, but still a bit on my phone as well. the mixing on him feels a little off compared to everyone else to my ear, which is odd compared to the bell-like perfect clarity the stolen version has. this isn’t a diss to Steven, he has a beautiful voice and is the perfect polites which may be why this production difference sticks out more than any one else’s. idk maybe i’m tripping but it feels like he lost some of the innocence in his voice as a result 🥺

i wonder if the lotus eaters sound a little deeper to distinguish them from the winions

i love the “nom nom nom,” “scary cave,” and “that way” 😂😂😂

WARRIOR OF THE MIND

Teagan is so solid it’s unreal, athena songs can’t help but be bops and aside from the “villain god songs” are my favs

thought it was “you lied to me,” not “enlighten me” until yesterday 😅

CYCLOPS

POLYPHEMUS

ik after the ts master’s heist that re-recorded masters have to be distinguishable for legal reasons, but it’s so interesting what and how choices were made here, such as polyphemus’ voice change

“watch out” and the mixing leading into Survive is perfection

SURVIVE

the fighting is excellent

OKAY GUITAR???

the harmonizing is stunning

the deaths are even more brutal 😭😭

ik he squished polites but polyphemus is so pitiful and they are in his house, you could never make me hate him in this version 🥺 (in hades 2 yeah fuck that guy lolol)

REMEMBER THEM

eurylochus screaming is very good

Jay’s vocals are DELICIOUS!! this song might be the biggest improvement for him.

the crew sounds more reverential and mournful while od grows in anger throughout which i like how that builds into the name reveal

GAH od’s no and athena’s no are both more terrifying now that they exchanged energy

background vocals during the build to his name reveal seem much more pronounced, which is interesting but i love it

“hey cyclops” really feels like the culmination of all the anger in this songs and then we get hit with the new “odysseus”

MY GOODBYE

platonic breakup song of my dreams 😩😩😩

oooh that growl on “waste” is everything

her disappointment is a little sadder in this one

nailed it, kept the magic, i have nothing but love for this song

RE-RECORDINGS OVERALL

Jorge’s vocals are so much clearer throughout and his acting is so much more nuanced! I didn’t have any criticism for the original version before, but having them to compare now makes me really appreciate his growth and depth of understanding of the character arc Ody’s on in the new ones.

the mixing is so smooth and I LOVE the new vocals for the ensemble

STRINGSSS

such a glow up on the cover art!!!

every song was either an improvement or just as good, but i need more time with open arms to decipher my full feelings on that one

i’m really glad Jorge did this.

⭐️ REMINDER: STREAM NEW VERSIONS ONLY FROM NOW ON SO MR JALAPEÑO CAN BE HELLA PAID YO ⭐️

now…

THUNDER

SUFFERING

i didn’t consider Jorge had lied about the sirens not being included until the end, so at first i thought it was a dream or something, but realized the heavy production meant some god/monster fuckery + the repeated trying to get him in the water + use of Penelope’s voice it became apparent to me just in time for the turn.

this song is so cute and ridiculous

the tonal dissonance was jarring but then on additional passes it’s so perfect to express how out of place what’s happening is. it’s confusing because it’s wrong

Anna’s delivery of “of course” and “oh no” are so playful, i love that he found an creative way to include more penelope

shy my ass lolol that was around when it clicked

also since they’re sirens, this is what he wants to hear most which is sad to think about if this is how he desires their marriage to be when he returns 😓. no matter of love or support can fix all the pain and guilt he’ll carry the rest of his life, but that hope is all he has

DIFFERENT BEAST

i love that “my real wife knows” is gonna probably mirror penelope saying something like “my real husband would know” in the ithaca saga

the layering of voices in the chorus

12 years or so is SO funny

i’d be scared so shitless

“nah you wouldn’t have spared me” and “let them drown” delivery

the crew’s turn from “we” to “he” then od singing “kill them all” before the following 3 songs is UNHINGED

SCYLLA

i was most excited for this song going in and was NOT disappointed!

scylla vocals in the backdrop to eurylochus’ confession feels reminiscent of puppeteer after his attempted confession with circe layered over. this time odysseus makes a different choice 😭

not much to say > i’ve got a secret > i opened the windbag > *silence* > light up 6 torches no words just ????????

DROWN - CHOKE - BLEED is so crunchy i want to mix it into my granola

the monstrous scylla belting is EVERYTHING and left me wanting so much more, so i guess i just have to repeat this song forever (but if Jay wants to release a Scylla extended cut i would be the #1 supporter)

“we are the same you and i” after his transformation into the monster is the stuff music is made for

MUTINY

luck runs out reprisal with the strings is gonna be the end of me

“crazy and mad”

he said gaslight me PLSSSS

eurylochus losing his mind with the loss of his faith in od will leave me in shambles for the foreseeable future

“SAY SOMETHING”

“I CANT” ��😬😬

electric guitar is guitarringggg

there is no price he won’t pay- the moment of clarity for the crew

yeah od why did you think they’d still trust you lol

im still not over the fact that burr and hamilton switching it up at the end is what sealed their fates and i imagine the same will remain true of ody and eury repeating that devastating irony

i wasn’t sure who would win the duel or if they’d keep the cows in, so as soon as i heard that cow i was like it’s over they’re so cooked they can’t conceive of how bad this is gonna be. helios don’t play about those cows (even though i’m inclined to think Jorge is switching it to be apollo for the sake of simplicity for epic which would also explain why apollo’s part of god games is still unknown even though his part is first)

wind god/sun god is so special to me

eurylochus isn’t himself anymore, odysseus was his hope

“please don’t tell me you’re about to do what i think you’ll do”

“ODY-“ brb screaming crying throwing up

“im just a man” 😭

he didn’t even get to enjoy a final meal, they died for nothing and it’s so damn sad

the acting in this may be the best in the entire musical

“captain?” 🥺😭 his hunger is so great and his spirit is so broken

“WHO DO YOU THINK HE’LL SEND???” is so desperate and well delivered

⚡️⚡️⚡️THUNDER BRINGER⚡️⚡️⚡️

the thunder and chanting and electric guitar and percussion and LUKE’S VOICE and-

the lyrical implications are so appropriately horrible but the beat is seductive and his voice is so powerful and it slides and shoots like lightning strikes or thunder rumbling might- culminating into a banger that captures the king of the gods’ essence perfectly. he is divine judgment and i would say that he abuses that but he doesn’t even see it that way. you implicitly can’t refuse his power, you never had the option and it’s terrifying and so damn zeus.

i truly have no notes that aren’t appreciation and awe. i won’t declare so definitively out of awareness that recency bias is in play, but this may best ruthlessness as my favorite.

odysseus will hate rain and the ocean for the rest of his life, they mean one of the big 3 is coming to fuck up his whole life 😅😅😅

“tell me” and “enlighten me” have me so giddy, he’s enjoying himself so much lol

so many GORGEOUS line deliveries in this whole song. this entire song is GORGEOUS line deliveries. one of my favs is how “choose” and “you or your crew” is said like a gentle interlude for the showier singing but is the most devastating part. the climax is in the quiet for this song

“please don’t make me do this” callback is lethal. odysseus never would’ve made another choice but the way they respectively play out and how he feels about them are brutal.

“let me take the suffering from you” he’s drawing from the siren’s version of penelope to convince himself he can live with the guilt. he uses her as an excuse time and time again to do the worst things, so much so that that’s how he sees her now. he’s desperate for her to be that because how else can he face himself? the one time he looked inward he saw a monster, no wonder he always has to look to/for her.

“captain?”

“i have to see her”

“but we’ll die”

“i know”

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

they sound like scared children and i’m NOT OKAY. eurylochus gave everything for 12 years and odysseus told him he would do ANYTHING to save eury specifically when he risked his life for the pig-ified crew and not only was that not true, he ultimately chose to let him and 35 other men die in a final betrayal after withering his hope, faith, and mind. odysseus is devastated and racked with guilt but it was never a choice. he merely sees himself more honestly now, not the hero he saw in the mirror at the start of the journey, or even back on aeaea.

ik it’s the chorus but also it’s just like zeus to make it about himself again as he decimates these men. his all-powerful divine judgement is his right and stands as his thesis, as ruthlessness for mercy of self does for poseidon.

it sounds like a lullaby at the end like it does in THATI and Just a Man. innocence has died for the final time, there’s nothing good in him left to sacrifice. all he has is the hope that what’s left can still be loved and accepted by penelope because his love of self is gone. yet all that remains is selfishness. he’s calcified into himself, and this makes me hungry to re-read his character study in Circe by Madeline Miller because they do the same thing: Epic reveals this truth through his own perception of himself while Circe does it through the memories of those who loved him and most desperately wanted to the lies he believed about himself to be true.

FINAL THOUGHTS

i will NEVER hate eurylochus. he was top 3 before, but after this saga he is definitively my favorite character. were there devastating consequences to his actions? i mean yeah but also odysseus expected unconditional faith after making the original decision that put them in danger in the first place. his grief and/or pride (depending on how you interpret epic’s depiction of od) and ignoring eury/athena is what put them all in poseidon’s sights. he was clever, yes, but what did that ultimately amount to? it makes all the sense in the world that eurylochus lost faith in his cleverness when he saw the consequences and then just when od earned back his trust, he sacrificed 6 of their men without even trying to be clever. it’s all tragic and if you’re withholding criticism for od but can’t hold nuance for eury then we are having very different experiences, idk what to tell you lol.

danger motifffff

i hope the crew haunts od’s ass so we can hear them again, but either way what an expertly executed ending for those characters and that chapter of odysseus’ life. brava.

this may be the best saga. again- recency bias- but it’s certainly going to be one of the best when all is said and done. THANK YOU JAY. THANK YOU ARMANDO. THANK YOU ANNA. THANK YOU LUKE. THANK YOU KJ.

so far my ranking is reverse track order

i hope we get the wisdom saga sooner than later because i’m greedy for good art lol but i’d wait however long Jay needs for another saga as well executed as this one

10/10 acting, 10/10 singing, 10/10 production. so much heart, skill, and talent has been put into this project and i’m really happy to be on this journey of appreciating and analyzing it with y’all in real time ☺️

i’m most looking forward to calypso and penelope as characters, but god games, get in the water, and hold them down as songs in each of the remaining sagas. (also my boy hephaestus)

if you made it this far, holy shit thank you. if you have money to spare please sponsor a family on Operation Olive Branch, also stream songs with proceeds being raised for liberation (such as Revolutin’ by Amira Unplugged), and Free Palestine, Congo, Sudan, Tigray, West Papúa, Haití, Hawaii, Armenia, Uyghur, and Turtle Island til it’s backwards! None of us are free until we’re all free.

[ritartistside]

VENOM 3 MASSIVE SPOILERS

As the title says, these are my opinions and stuff from the Hungarian version, that I saw 1 hour ago.

Jesus Christ the Queerbaiting lol

First of all, my heart goes out to the people who belived that there will be anything edit: explicitly romantic. I am a comicbook fan, I had almost zero expectations bc I don't trust film studios, but even I felt kinda gooped.

Good God the marketing department went bananas mode and there was nothing behind it.

I hope the tiktok acount person at least feels a bit bad lol /j!

So, nothing romantic besides stuff like: "We have been together for a year", "You always take me out to eat to the best places", the line about Eddie being the sexiest man alive. Also, Venom told Eddie that he would be a great dad and Eddie cried.

No "I love you" no "Darling" no "My love" (at least in the Hungarian version)

Also there was a scene, where Venom licked food of Eddie's face with his tongue that came out of Eddie's mouth

Venom straight up dies in the end (very heroic, it's by acid and explosions and the is taking all the symbiote hunters/Xenophages down with him and protecing Eddie), but it's kinda implied that he may come back, and they introduced more of the the King in Black story with Knull.

Knull appeared for 3 minutes, incuding the post-credit scene impling much more to come.

I don't remeber the science girlies' names, but I think they were sapphic. They held hands for like 5 frames. I don't know if they were together since the begining, but in the end they probably were in love, hopefully. It was super blink and you will miss it, I am not impressed, (we deserve more than this, this was nothing, I really hope SONY won't be patting themselves on the back for LGBT rep) come on. One of them now has a symbiote, and they will probably appear in more movies. I hope people make gif sets of them and stuff, they would have been cute. One of them frees Venom, so he can reunite with Eddie.

There was a cool scene in a river, where Eddie was being chased by agents and Venom separated from him and used different organisms to get to Eddie.

The hippie family from the trailer, they were cute, I don't feel like they were annoying. They were (the father was) alien fans, on a roadtrip to see some. The mom might have died in the end, or they just didn't show her as much as the dad and kids, or my eyes are shit. The endig was visually very dark and I straight up didn't know what was happening sometimes.

The first half was perfect in my eyes. Eddie's moral degradation, eating people, acting like a predator (nice), saving dogs from a dog fight ring Venom controlling Eddie a lot during the fight scene, and later Eddie ,while separated from Venom, killing a person.

Lots of exposition that was repeated multiple times.

The thing that got me thinking was that Venom (and all other symbiotes) knew a LOT about the Xenophages and stuff. And like, he knew that they both won't be able to survive. So was the whole movie him trying to push the inavitable in time out as much as possible so he can spend some nice moments with Eddie, before the end? Or as they said, neither one of them wanted to die, but V was just hyping himself up for death? IDK, kinda cool if it is meant to be thought provoking, eh if it's just a plot hole and makes the movie seem kinda pointless.

Bar scene in the begining was cool, they started in MCU and quick change back to SONY.

Also IDK if the writers forgot, that Eddie said in LTBC that Venom takes care of Eddie being hungover, bc he had a pretty bad hangover for the first half of the movie, or if it was just V messing with Eddie, or him not doing stuff to Eddie's body if he doesn't explicitly asks him to (big if true, is probably not the case), but in the end, this is a non-issue

Multiple symbiotes with random hosts, the setting most of the time was in a lab under Area 51. Detective Mulligan was there for 10 minutes an died, he also had a symbiote.

The Xenophages were like woodchippers, more blood and swearing in this movie than I expected (positive for me, I liked it,).

I could go on and on, but these were the most important bits in my opinion.

I was not very impressed in general, but I had fun especially in the first half.

Read the comics <3

Also, my little sis cried her eyes OUT, so it is a pretty emotional movie to some.

Sorry for the spelling mistakes, as you probably can guess after the title, english in not my first language.

I hope you can enjoy this movie more than I could, my little sis loved it, she thinks this is the best from the trilogy

Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk

[wildglitch]

What if Zombies!Spidey x DCU LETS GOOOOOOOOO-

O K-

So, This is the (Probably not the last, don't worry) post with ideas for my What If Zombies!Peter In the DCU AU. This is the post that (Finally) Focuses on the DC side of things. This post Is also going to be mainly focused on Peter and what he's up to cause he's the focus of this AU, but I’m probably gonna make another post with info on the other heroes, so If your interested in that, don't worry cause I am thinking about them (Bucky & Loki = Brainwashed bros)

Its also part 1 of Idk since this post kinda got away from me with its length (oops)

Anyways, without further adieu, let's start :D 

-So! starting this off with something fun and not that serious that I just found out. this should have probably gone in the first post but I didn't know this until now so here, a +1 info on “facts about the zombie apocalypse” tm. 

Ok, so at this point you know I like to play around with the timeline right? Ok so, I’m researching the dates and events things take place in right? Turns out, the snap happened in either May or June, and one source even said that it happened on May 31. Now, with this in mind and the fact that I said the apocalypse lasted between 7-8 months, what happens if you subtract 8 months from May? You get October. And if you add the date to it? Guys…I accidentally made it that the zombie apocalypse starts on Halloween! That's just insane!

The official timeline now is 7 months of the zombie apocalypse, no more no less, sorry, I don't make the rules :^ (omg I made Antman & the Wasp a halloween movie lmao. It fits)

-Alright so, Peter, Head Scott/w the cloke and T’challa are on a plane on their way to Wakanda when all of a sudden, well, how many of you seen the Young Justice Episode s1e19 Misplaced? (Btw have I talked about how much I love Billy batson? I will one of these days ok, and that's a threat) well anyways

Airplane squad: *”peacefully” traumatized on a plane to Wakanda

Airplane squad: *the people on the plane fucking fazes out of reality leaving him alone to fly the plane*

Peter: *Panik*

Peter: *feels a pull wanting to take him but fighting it off as he tries to fly a fucking plane*

Peter: *also fades out of reality but much later the other and is now falling to certain doom in the middle of the ocean*

Peter: “Oh What the F-”

Ya that-

I mixed aspects of the snap and scene from misplaced as their way of splitting up. And, they did split up. A high speed plane plus the time it took them to disappear firmly separates Peter from the rest of the heros. And thus the adventure commences

-unlike Billy who can fly, Peter falls head first at top speeds and a thousand meters high into the ocean.  This can happen a few different ways

1) Peter is stranded, and is found by Young Justice or any superhero team that was passing through the ocean and thinks “Oh shoot, that's a child”. And this is how he ends up with the league. This one is kinda fast and there wouldn't be any identity reveal since at this point this Peter has no concept of such a thing. But a good way to work around this is memory loss. Not really my cup of tea but I can very much see this happening considering how hard he hit his head

2) …So Peter fucking dies-

Listen! I somehow started off with my 2 most opposite extremes of ideas, but hear me out. The fall? It kills him. But lets say that some cult or the league of assassins or some shit find his body, realize he’s a “meta” and decide “Yeah, this is a good revival candidate” And they revive the poor sucker. He is held captive HYDRA style and they try to turn him into a weapon. Obviously, he escapes, set free onto the world with a few months of trauma and a stolen one way ticket anywhere. And that anywhere just so happens to be Gotham. I’ll let your mind take it from there

3) This is the last version of events I’m gonna mention and I think this one is the one I'm sticking with, purely for the comedic potential I can see coming out of this. So Peter fought back the spell right? Well unlike the snap where he was fighting a force of nature were he would not have won, Peter was fighting Loki off, which,

Peter: Fighting off that staticy feeling that's trying to take him

Loki: *Genuinely struggling to get this non magic kid to corporate with him*

Loki: Damnit CHILD! I'm trying to save your worthless life!

Peter: *Legit almost wins and gets left by himself in the zombieland* 

Loki: …What did they feed you?

Yeah, so since Loki had to focus on getting that idiot spider child to cooperate, he loses track of everyone else, and all of a sudden, the fuzzy mental image he had of everyone dissipates, and Peters becomes the full focus. This lets him save the kid from the crash, but he now doesn't know where all of the others are, including his brother, and now he can't really get to any of them.

-Peter is saved with a spell that's basically the bubble from steven universe but Loki style. He can breathe just fine, but he can't get out or call for hell. He spends many Hours like this.

-Ok so, Loki is a god. We have established this, I keep mentioning it (sorry) he himself brings this up multiple times. What is something gods tend to have sometimes? Avatars, people who act out their will on Earth. You see where I'm going with this? Since Peter is the only mortal from his world he has access to, and because he is stuck on the watchtower, he decides to make a deal with Peter to make him his Avatar and have him look for the others (Thor). Peter, after having most of the situation explained to him, accepts his offer, with a few conditions here and there that prevent Loki from taking full advantage of him. But at the end of the day, they are both desperate and accept the others' offers and conditions with little fuss.

-Deals and conditions for the avatar contract between Peter and Loki

Loki’s Mission: Find the other mortals and spread chaos as his agent Loki’s Offer: Slight magical aid, “ability boost”, Protection from other magical entities, Godly guide and knowledge and Loki wont force Peter into doing anything too grotesque Loki’s conditions for Peter: He will be able to access anything Peter is seeing and be able to take control of any situation if he sees it fit, he must go on the missions he sends him on, And if the situation ever truly demands it, he will listen to everything Loki tells him to do Peter’s Mission: Finding his friends and finding a cure to his world in this new one as Loki’s Agent. He must also make good impressions on other Magical being in this world as to not shame the god he’s representing Peter Offer: His loyalty and tentative trust, he won't argue too much and will do his absolut best to find Thor. he will Listen to Loki and do what he says Peter’s Conditions for Loki: Will become his Avatar as long as he gets to keep being a hero and doesn't have to hurt or kill people. He will only do a mission once a month, and he will not advertise the Avatar bit. Peter gets free will, He can refuse to do something as long as he isn't demanded of it.

With this, a hand shake, and some blood, The deal is made in the bubble in the middle of the ocean.

-Peter is now Loki’s Avatar, Moonknight style, Yay! They don't really like each other that much due to circumstance but it's fineeeeeee. I did this because 1) I thought of a scenario that didn't really make sense unless Peter was somehow talking to him 2) It’s a little nod to the fact most of the fics have the snapped souls with Peter on his adventure. I thought that this way he can still have his voice in his head , it's not that crowded because it's only one voice, and it's not that Intrusive because Loki isn't going to be with Peter 24/7 only when he needs him, he's using some of his powers, or when he can sense distress or danger coming from Peter- Other than that he's stuck at the watchtower trying to plan his next moves. And 3) Cause the thought came to me and i thought it was fucking Holirouse.

-With Some trickery, Peter sneaks onto a boat and spends his time hidden under the deck pretending and hides like a corner spider the whole trip

-Peter in his, Hasn't been around actual living breathing humans for such a long time, self, breaks down and cries at the docks. Coincidentally, The bats are doing a drug bust there and a wearhouse not 10 feet away from him blows up. 

-Peter in his typical fashion, Puts on his mask and runs into the building looking for survivors.

-The bats, not knowing what happened, see’s this costume stranger helping the thugs get away and immediately clocks him as a villain. Opps

-They fight, misunderstandings happen and now, The friendly neighborhood Spider-Man Is on the front page as gothams hottest new Rogue. Well shit

-Peter being the smart guy he is, squats at an unoccupied apartment and claims it as his. Then Loki shows up after weeks of radio silence, takes one look at the place and says, hell nah, and fixes the place up with magic making the place more than livable. With some (probably magical) persuasion, the guy renting out the place actually puts him on the lease with 50 bucks of monthly rent. Does Peter feel guilty…well? Gotta roll with the punches man. Plus, this place looks nice, ignoring his 20 something neighbor that has enough blood on him to turn his white hair dye red that had sent his spider sense. This is fine.

-With some help from the voice in his head and walking through dark alleys at night, he finds a guy that works for immigration and was selling sketchy (But legit) identities. Not really trusting the guy but in desperate need and ID for the lease he was about to sign, He coughs up all the savings he had, took a Photo, and Ben P. Riley was born. He said he didn't trust the guy.

-Peter has decided to go by an alias for a few reasons, like not knowing if there was already another Peter Parker in this reality and not really wanting to risk it or the plain fact that he didn't really trust anyone in this new reality with it  (Loki and his magical guidance, he has firmly decided to never give out his name so freely ever again). His name is one of the last things from his past life that he can call his own, And if his “Villainous” identity was revealed as Peter Parker, he didn't know if he could handle it. The most simple reason was that he just missed his family and wanted something in this new life he was making for himself to remind himself of them. Ofcourse, he still added that P in there middle so as to not completely erase himself.

-Peter spends a full month just trying to get used to living in a society again, This causes some problems and misunderstandings.

-After many series of misunderstandings and mishaps, everyone thinking he's evil, Peter decides, YK what's, If I can't beat them, join them. Peter starts going out as the “Villain Spider-Man” doing sketchy shit (normal teenage shit) and causing a commotion in Gotham. Peter counts this as his act of mischief and Loki agrees when he sees the kid sell his own photos to the newspaper. Peter isn't actually doing anything evil, it's just his presence that brings fear. The fact that the bats have caught him breaking into multiple high security facilities doesn't really help his case

-Peter spends his months looking through files and files of info searching for the others, but has just about no luck on anything.

-Peter, forced by a mission, goes undercover in Gotham prep to follow one of Loki’s leads. He doesn't really know what he's doing here, but this Tim guy is pretty nice

-Cause of the amazing pictures he keeps selling to the paper, the company hires him full time as their photographer for special events and even lets him write a few articles when they see the notes he puts next to his pictures that provide contexts and stuff like that. This job opens Peter to search to a whole new horizon.

-With Peter's new job, hes sent to many different cities which introduces him to many different people

-He meets Jimmy Olson on a trip to Metropolis and hits it off pretty well with the older man. Jimmy introduces him to his friends and coworkers Lois and Clark, both of whom are just a delegate. Though that Clark guy as not stopped setting of his spider sense since he met him

-The next place he went to was a city called Fawcett, where he was sent to help with a story with one of the local reporters who was apparently his age.

Boss guy: Ben, meet Billy. You two will be working together on the report for this years summer festival

Peter: *Looks at Billy*

Billy: *Looks at ‘Ben’*

*Insert that one Spider-Man meme*

The two sniff each other out as godly “employees” and exchange numbers. And thus, a friendship was born as Billy decided to keep an eye out for any other reality travelers, and Peter is put as one of his emergency contacts to help him get out of shit since he was “technically 20 according to his ID”

-Peter is also sent to Gothams sister city Bludhaven. Peter,ends up meeting a weird police officer that keeps expecting him to take pictures of the guy. But he's nice enough and bought him a hotdog and a cinnamon roll(even though he now thinks he's allergic to them), so the weird outweighs the good.

-On his trip to Bludhaven, Peter decides to go out as spider-man. Not to cause trouble, but to go sightseeing and swinging without the interference of a bat. He ends up sitting upside down on an old building (like that one Atsv scene)  working on some leads he has when all of a sudden, Nightwing appeared right behind him dangling off the side of the building like a mad man giving him a heart attack. Nightwing is about to confront the spider after his sneak attack was caught, but before he does, Peter holds out the cinnamon roll towards the vigilante as a peace offering rushing out the words “Please don't hit me!” and Nightwing just stares. He stares long and hard looking between the treat and the Spider mask. Peter was about to run from them when Nightwing sort of just…sits. Or sits at the best of his abilities with no gravity defying powers. He actually does a pretty good job at it. Nightwing takes to offering with a nod and the 2 just sort of sit there in silence. It's awkward and weird, and quiet but for some reason he doesn't feel as uncomfortable as he thinks he should. Even less when he feels the ringing of his spider senses slowly die down as the minutes pass until it's just a constant hum at the back of his head

-They don't talk after that but from here is a turning point as to how the Bat clan view the spider.

More? Nay I say! (There will be a part 2 to this specific post, but it has gotten too long and I need to go to bed. So hopefully this will do for now :^) Plus this feels like agood stoping point since I feel like that ending would mark the ending to an arc

Please let me know what you think of this AU. I love seeing other people's ideas and thoughts. It fuels me lo

And make sure to keep an eye out for Part 2 of this post.

Later

[tree-obsession]

Gold and Red Text in Penacony

So, for some reason, I have decided to torture myself by creating a theory that will likely have some plot relevance??? but not totally sure. it has popped up a bunch of times and seems to confuse a lot of people, so I'm just putting together what I know! feel free to tell me if I missed something, as I haven't done many of the side quests yet...

Anyway, spoiler warning for 2.0 trailblaze mission and possibly some of the side quests?? idk proceed with caution! I don't read many leaks so I doubt there's spoilers for that but tell me right away if there are any!

Alright, so the first time we see different-colored text in this mission is during Acheron's first meeting with the Trailblazer. According to this twitter thread (credits to user mobnermal, NOT me) Acheron's dialogue will change, depending on the gender of the tb and how we respond to her queries. She also says towards the end of the convo something along the lines of "It feels like multiple different versions of you were talking to me, saying a different thing each time".

So, I'm not entirely sure why she's lying, or even if she's doing it intetionally. It does seem like there's some aspect of "different possibilities within the Dreamscape" happening- almost like the Dreamscape itself is changing the tb's answers/Acheron's questions. But again, we'll get a bit into the dreamscape later.

2. Aventurine's final convo with the tb, and then Black Swan later.

My screenshots were failing me so hard in this quest lol.

Anyway, as far as I know, these two are the only ones in this mission who use gold text. It's mostly used to highlight the word "truth", and according to the wiki and playthroughs I have watched this dialogue doesn't change- only Acheron's red seems inconsistent. I find it interesting Black Swan put quotations around it, and I have no idea what this could imply. I assume she knows something we and Aventurine don't about Robin's death, which seems to be what they were referring to during this part.

As to how that "upends everything"... I don't know what the implications of her death are. It's implied by the npc who raised Robin (can't find any screenshots- I didn't take any, but it's dialogue from an npc in the Golden Hour) and Sunday and Robin's dialogue in the very beginning- the one where they were "shades"- that Robin's voice may have some special quality that could mind-control/ brainwash people to some extent. This is a bit of a tangent, but may point out why the gold test is so important- the new Harmony trace mats match Robin's design very well, and are part of the Order. The Order's- Ena's- symbol is an eyeball, which can be found in a lot of places on Penacony, but most importantly Sunday's clothes. Judging from what we know of Sunday's control-freak-esque personality (sorry dude ):) it's possible he or someone else in The Family is using Robin's potential powers to brainwash the people of different factions. If you choose the alternate ending, everything wraps up a bit too nicely, and nobody seems to want to leave Penacony after that. Tb never finds out about Robin's death in that ending, either. There's a lot of implications there that I don't want to get into for this post, but basically- The Family is orchestrating something, probs pinned the blame on the IPC in the bad ending (since otherwise why would hoyo tell us that?) and then brainwashed everyone to never leave. Why? No idea! But it does explain why Robin's "truth" (in quotations, because Black Swan's dialogue does imply Robin's not dead) is so important to the plot.

That was a bit of a tangent, lol. Going back to the first sc, I find it interesting Aventurine is the one to tell us this, and if we're going with the idea that gold=truth, that just tells us Acheron's most certainly an Emanator, no matter what the Dreamscape does. Why they choose to have Aventurine reveal this, especially with the first instance of golden text- that's still up in the air. However, something I want to throw in is that there was a theory floating around Twitter comparing his eyes to the eye behind Ena in their official art. They are identical- even the gold outline on Ena's eye matches his eyeliner. Since it's implied in his conversation with Sparkle his eyes are a defining feature of his race, Sigonian, and that their civilization has been taken over (I'm not clear on details) or fallen apart somehow- akin to how civilizations under Ena's rule fell apart after their death- there may be some relation. Also, Aventurine was sent to Penacony specifically, which Topaz questioned- this may be why Diamond sent him. It implies a lot of plot relevance for him later, certainly!

3. The really, really ominous text you can get from a side quest.

If you go to the Reverie(Dreamscape) VIP lounge teleport beacon and head to the wall, you find a broken Clockie surrounded by purple bubbles. If you haven't done this quest yet- do it now, I really can't explain all this! search up a guide- there's a couple good ones on youtube. you do get a sticker!

anyway, some screenshots of the tape's text (cw for slight gore, explosions, screams, overall very ominous and vague tour-guidey stuff):

sorry for the text overlap lol, this was very inconveniently sized for screenshots.

anyway, yeah! possibly the most unnerving thing in the game so far (aside from those lost text stickers...). but, as you can tell, I'm gonna focus on the gold and red text. fair warning, I don't really know what to make of this, but I think there's some connection...

first, gold. this is, if we go off what I previously thought, the "truth". My current theory is that this gold is true of within or outside dreamscape- in other words, the dreamscape cannot alter that thing in the gold text. It's there, regardless of how the dreamscape screws other things up. The "truth" in the dreamscape isn't necessarily reliable, since dreamscape seems to fuck with everything, but gold is apparently truth, so we're sticking to that. That means that bloodshed, mind-opening (?), and pressure-releasing (???) is... true? It's kind of interesting- the other things in gold we've seen are statements with meaning, and this... kinda isn't. However, it could imply this is actually what's happening in the Dreamscape. Some kind of deranged, creepy thing that the dreamscape/ the Family is doing while everyone else is on this cool-looking vacation. I have no idea why that line, of all the lines, is gold, but it's certainly not something someone trying to make Penacony look good would say! That's all I know.

Not much I know about why the red one, specifically, is red either. Are the instruments/music fake? That's certainly a recurring motif in Penacony, between bands in the Golden Hour and Robin being a songstress, plus Ena's "Beyond the Sky Choir", their exclusive faction, which fell apart upon their death. Something about Ena being swallowed by XIpe will certainly be brought up later, I'm almost totally sure. It's also interesting it gets cut off by static, without even finishing the statement(I think). I have no idea what to make of these- I just needed to point out the similarities between this tape and the dialogue.

Also, the tape itself is suspicious. According to Woolesley, there are multiple, appearing all over the Reverie (Dreamscape) and sometimes even messing with the Dreamscape.

First of all, why the hell is he telling us this very classified-sounding info? Also, he literally might pop up next to you- it's inevitable that you give him the tape at some point, really showing how The Family is cracking down on these.

Also, who's making these tapes? Why are they leaving them around the Dreamscape if they know it'll be taken? What's with these side effects/corrupting? And what's the relation between the tapes, Acheron, and Aventurine/Black Swan- are those things revealed in the tapes things only those three are aware of, or care to tell tb? It's really weird, especially since they're apparently in Clockie statues? Also, why tapes even- the tapes themselves seem corrupted(or censored?) weirdly, judging from the lines, and also just... why would anyone make these? Someone against the Family presumably wouldn't do rebellion in such a way, and someone within would have no reason to create this at all- is the Dreamscape itself making it? it's the only thing using both red and gold text...

there's probably some connection to Clockie, since that's who is most likely talking in the tape... and that's the statue we found it in too. Clockie is sus in a whole host of ways- don't even get me started, but I'm not sure how they relate to this theory just yet.

I have no idea. The tape is super creepy, but things probably will clear up a bit in 2.1!

tldr/clarification(sry for rambling so much): red text = lie/subjective/ easily changeable, to the dreamscape at least

gold text= "truth", dreamscape is unable to change it(?)

ena probs will have some lore relevance along with Robin, who seems to be the center of this "truth" for the moment

the bizarre tape is very mysterious and questionable, with nothing solid that we know about it- however, it uses both red and gold text, which automatically makes it suspicious even beyond what it's saying directly

what the hell is the family cooking up? i don't know, but it's probably not good! (for us, at least)

thank you for reading this lightly-proofread, very rambling theory/speculation- you are an angel for making it this long!

edit: so number one- I've added a reblog to this post- plz check it out, it has some other details from the Chadwick quest. and also, there's this Youtube video that mentions the red text in the beginning! It has a very similar idea to mine, but the thing it mentions is not an option I made (I accepted Acheron right away lol, so I didn't grab this detail). And the entire vid is pretty cool, so you should see it!

[camellia-salazar]

Ed Edd n Eddy Pony Redesigns.

Ed Edd n Eddy; Friendships are Jawbreakers. (Ed Edd n Eddy rhymes with My Little Pony)

I did this last month, but for some reason put off posting it until now.

I was into both shows at the time, so it was easy for me to understand the characters as well as the rule set of the MLP universe.

I would tell you each explanation of their cutiemarks, but maybe in another post. For now, I'll explain at least a few distinct facts about each of them.

Ed: Him and Sarah's family are relatively stronger than the average earth pony thanks to them actually being hella strong in canon. AJ would be tripping on the sight of Ed casually lifting a boulder.

Edd: Does pretty well with certain spells, less than Twilight and Starlight, but more capable than most unicorns his age. It takes a lot of energy to even do them, tho, like teleport.

Eddy: Pretty much what Scootaloo has when it comes to his wings. A lot of his insecurities are from his lack of flying. He can barely hover for about 3 seconds but ultimately crashes hard at the end. He blames it on not being taught.

Kevin: Not many ponies ride bikes. He's one of the exception. Wanted to be a Wonder Bolt at one point, but eventually dropped it on account of the day he earned his cutiemark. (I'll explain eventually).

Nazz: Like all unicorns, her magical ability depends on her cutiemark/special talent. She can spark up visions that resonate the stories she would tell. She was also trained in defense magic to protect the kids she would babysit along with herself.

Rolf: His family is the only one that have a stipe across their torsos. It just develops like a cutiemark, but only when you figure out the role you play for the family. So basically, there's a little more pressure on this kiddo.

Sarah: If my pony version would be a version of the show, she and Jimmy would earn their cutiemarks at around season 3. She would be a teeny tiny bit more empathetic, too, since she's a pony now.

Jimmy: He and Sarah were a lot like the CMC prior to their cutiemarks. Mostly inspired by the fact that they act like so in canon, always trying new things essentially. He also struggles with his magic like Sweetie Belle did for a while.

Jonny 2×4: He acts a lot like Pinkie Pie and often would stim by bouncing on his tail. Also, much like how I thought of Sarah and Jimmy, he would learn to fly later on, but most likely the end of season 2, beginning of season 3. Most likely, the former.

Plank: Was supposed to be an imagined pony, but idk if I want to keep that or have him be a dragon. He would give off griffin vibes at times, tho. Idk. Maybe I should just draw his face like the OG so that the others would keep guessing.

Lee Kanker: I couldn't think of her with normal mare hooves, so she inherited her dad's hoof look. Rather, she shaved it, or it was just developed that way is pretty unknown. I thought of the latter at first.

Marie Kanker: Much like Kevin, she loves cloud bucking. The only difference is that she loves it while he sees it as more of a chore. She would often get away with chores because her mother would tell her to. But even then, she would have fun doing it.

May Kanker: Most would be threatened with her magic being red, that is, anyone but her sisters. Not only would anyone know it's her, but also red magic is usually frowned upon. The judgment doesn't bother her, tho, giving the fact that she's used to it.

Eddy's Bro: He got one of the biggest pare of wings anypony had seen on a pegasus. Because of his huge wings, Eddy would have another reason to not only look up to him but also envy him. Stupid bro taking all the flight genes.

So that's it for now, I went from EEnE to other things, so it'll take some time before I get back into EEnE again.

Thanks for reading all of this. Have a good one. 👍💖✨️

[the-9th-genderfluid]

I finally got the digital ticket and bonus features of TGWDLM!

I got the digital ticket and bonus features for TGWDLM and will be putting realizations and stuff I like in this post so its gonna be a long one. A really long one. I'm sorry if this monstrosity of a post happens to cross your feed.

During the small bonus stuff:

I did not realize that the cast is truly that unhinged until the Kickstarter blooper real.

I do wish they had time to keep the clickbait/ top ten news site plot. It seems fun.

The Lipschitz name is from the landlord that was cut from the musical what? IDK what to do with this information.

The fact in the OG script, the meteor landed in a football field ( If Mariah's audition tape is to be believed) meaning the fan theory I once saw that the reason the hive mind sings is because its first victims were theater people so they were doing musical stuff so the spores thought that was how ppl acted on this planet would not work if the script had not changed that detail.

The Dracula arms becoming dabbing is great, I'm surprised but happy that it was not cut.

As a techie, the non actors dancing along in the corners is so accurate.

During the main musical stuff:

(Mostly not new things that the digital ticket version taught me, just me pointing out things I like, funny lines, etc.)

Paul and his autism face during the ted introduction scene

The small dialogue changes between the potshot on Youtube and the digital ticket are all very interesting. The first one I realized was Emma saying "please no come back." instead of "so mean." when man in a hurry says he will never buy there again.

Why does Paul look so awkward while Emma rants about her job.

Right as Lah Dee Dah Dah Day ends, you can hear a character saying "quick change quick change" as they run off stage. Cute and fun detail, I love it.

Legally required to mention the "think about the implications" scene. It is truly iconic. Are you frightened?

I feel like Emma would have a tumblr.

Kind of off topic, but they mention boardgames in the shrub scene, and specifically settlers of catan. I want to announce this is a settlers of catan hate blog, I would rather die than play it ever again. I am Paul hating musicals levels of hatred for that game. If you write anything positive about it, i will actually block you.

The entire alley/ trash can scene is amazing and I love it.

Paul constantly reeks of neurodivergent.

I may be ACAB, but god is Show Me Your Hands amazing and catchy.

Jeff struggling with props is my spirit animal, I am also chronically clumsy

As someone who was raised Christian, Ted's different denominations comment is so accurate to how some people act.

Iconic lines like kick your......head and fuck Clivesdale.

Paul and Emma's whole deep conversation about their childhoods and dreams takes place like two meters from Bill and Ted, and I always forget that because of the way it's cut but like it's funny to think about because it feels so personal, but the two guys are just... there.

Join Us (And Die) is horrifying. I feel like we need a musical where Jaime is the lead? I hear she is pretty vital to the Me and My Dick musical, I will have to watch that later I guess?

While Hidgens is pitching working boys, Ted is so invested, this is why you need to see both unedited and potshot of the musicals.

I love the references that aren't even references yet that the musical makes to NPMD and nightmare time.

I actually love the crack ship of the working boys polyamory theory.

The "should I take the chair?" "yeah and I will take the piano." bit is peak comedy.

I am not the first person to mention this at all, but Ted saying "I bleed red, white and..." *background turns blue* is so smart, bravo team Starkid.

I always cry at let it out, poor Paul.

I love the meta crowd thing the bows do, with Emma seeing the audience, even if its a repeat from Trail to Oregon, it's still good.

As a techie, I want to do lighting for TGWDLM sooo bad.

It's 2 am right now, and I have to decide if I finish this post tonight by watching the commentary video and editing the spelling errors, or if I decide not to fuck up my sleep schedule.

I decided not to completely fuck my sleep shedule, so it sadly took me a couple days.

The commentary video:

I actually don't have many comments after seeing the commentary video, but the things I do mention are long rants, mostly my own similar stories from the high school musical I did tech for.

Lauren hiding from her performance with a eye mask and earbuds is a mix of sad and funny. I hope she has more confidence now, because she is absolutely amazing.

Robert had tonsillitis?! God being sick while doing a musical sucks, half our cast and me had a cold or something for the show. I was right next to the camera because of the location of the tech booth, and so in the recording you hear me trying not to cough and failing for most of the show. I felt so bad.

People saying stuff about Melissa and obnoxious teen/hot chocolate boy surviving as a joke has me thinking thoughts because the actor that played Melissa played Steph, and hot chocolate boy ended up being Pete. IDK what thoughts I'm having, but I'm having them.

Jaime making props, without being asked, is so nice of her.

Omg, Jeff was sick too! That really sucks. The closest thing to a actually accident that would make us end the show was when we had a stage fall turning into a real fall because the actor was too dramatic. Damn theater kids!

Omg the megaphone stories are giving me flashback to the fucking piece of shit mics we had. Half of them would not actually work, one had to be constantly re adjusted and turned back on, the main girl's mic had way too much feedback, the other girl sang way too quiet and had a not great mic meaning you could never hear her, and for one performance, two of the actors somehow got mics mixed up and I had to spend so long switching channels to fix it. No one actually knows how it happened. I literally made jokes that someone must have walked the mic boxes under a ladder, opened a umbrella inside, and said Macbeth around them for how much of a pain they were.

Jeff despising the brain prop is great. Sometimes a prop is a stupid nightmare that you want to light on fire at the end.

What was Jeff doing to forget the main character's name? How did he land on Steve? He literally wrote some of the songs? I have so many questions.

Them not having the meteor prop until the opening day is terrifying to me, I would cry if that happened to me.

I want to reiterate my want to do tech, specifically lighting for this musical.

Ok that's all I have to say, I am going to go watch the musical again, bye babes, boys, and boomerangs

[sojirosteacup]

Makino's school uniform design, or, what are the colors of her clothes anyway?!

Hello, here is another post of me dissecting this 30 yo manga. This time we are focusing on Tsukushi's many uniform designs over the years! Enjoy!

If you ever read the manga and watched the anime, you may have noticed that Tsukushi's school uniform looks a bit different in both versions:

Her manga uniform has a gray tone, indicating that it is a dark color. Meanwhile, her skirt is checkered

In the anime, her uniform is yellow with a blue (not checkered!) skirt. It's a bit different from her manga design, but that's what usually happened with anime adaptations back then.

(They also changed the direction her suit buttons close. That's because the manga one was an oversight from the mangaka, girl's uniforms don't close that way.)

I imagine the animation studio changed the color pallete and a bit of the design to make the animation easier (again, as was common for anime from that time) and the mangaka kept them in her illustrations to keep the characters recognizable

also, were the black socks in this one an oversight or a reference to some of the dramas? Probably an oversight i'm reading too much into this

I know what you are thinking: "This is just our regular manga vs anime design difference from the 90's, why does it deserve a post?"

Because there is more!

Some of the anime merch shows her... wearing a red uniform?!? Its more often found on the VHS tape covers, but you can see it on some other merch too, like this puzzle i just saw on mercari:

?????????

Why red??? This is not the manga design, the suit color is dark but the skirt is different. It's also clearly anime merch. Was that some kind of prototype color pallete before the anime release?? Was there some version of the anime using a different color pallet? What is going on???? I have no idea.

This color was clearly the inspiration for the J-drama uniform, though (with a few changes).

So what was the original color of her uniform anyway? Well, we may never know. Correct me if i'm wrong, but i can't find any color art of her or another character in uniform from before the anime aired. The color images from the early days of the manga tended to show the characters in normal clothes. Unless there is some Margaret color page I don't know about.

However, when you look at the color version of the manga (released digitally, many years later) you can see they colored it blue with a yellow checkered skirt.

I don't know if this is the originally intended color, or if the colorist designed for the job just thought it fit the design (though, i imagine they had some guidance for the colors), but it might be the closest thing to the original vision for her uniform colors.

This design + the black and white manga one was clearly the inspiration for the k-drama uniform (again, with a few changes)

(it might not look like in the picture, but Jandi's uniform is dark blue)

Also, in a few scenes she is shown to wear something else beside the normal uniform. Probably an alternative uniform for hotter days:

Which i think served as inspiration for the thai-drama/lakorn uniform

(I also think it served as inspiration for the coat Jandi wears under her uniform in the k-drama, but i could be reaching here)

What's the point of this post? Idk, it's late and i should be sleeping and this is probably full of spelling mistakes i'll only notice tomorrow and cringe at, but i hope you enjoyed the random uniform trivia.

[konigbabe]

'plagiarism' issue

Not one for drama, yet I want to bring attention to this. I won’t elaborate on this issue more.

So it happened.

A while ago but it remains slowly nipping at my brain. For that case, I have decided to write it all down and collect my thoughts using this post.

My work like real people do (and the whole thought/idea behind it) has been taken, rewritten, tweaked and published as someone else's idea (that they apparently had since spring). I asked them to take it down privately. They did add my @ and for some time, I was content until they started creating the whole "universe" around it and taking praise for it even tho it's not their original idea.

The dark side of fanfiction is that there is not much I can do but at least I can make awareness about the issue.

Starting this with some definitions and clearance:

plagiarism: "Presenting work or ideas from another source as your own...by incorporating it into your work without full acknowledgment.[1]"

I love this by Wattpad themself:

What if they give credit?

"It is still plagiarism even if you give credit. Even when someone uses an artist's base or picture they are expected to change it up to become something new, rather than just running it through a filter, or tweaking it with a few minor edits. There is a major difference between copying another person's storyline and making edits and actually writing a story.[2]"

Now to the point:

For LRPD, I have created a very specific premise that I haven't read/seen before:

Leon is a single dad of a young girl (didn't specify age but definitely a preteen, around fourth grade).

He is absent from his daughter's life, especially from her school activities. He becomes this "enigma" for the teachers.

The daughter doesn't have a mother. 

Teacher!reader is concerned for the daughter's wellbeing so one day, when Leon picks her up, she requires to have a talk with him.

During the talk, he offers her a dinner instead of having to participate in school activities.

Teacher!reader and Leon sleep together during the first off-school meeting. 

Teacher!reader wakes up before Leon and looks at his exposed [muscular] back.

Teacher!reader searches for the bathroom, notices Leon’s poorly decorated apartment except for his daughter’s stuff. 

Teacher!reader is reffered to as "Miss teacher" in this universe.

They copied almost THE WHOLE premise. It'd be okay to write your own version of single dad Leon and his kid's teacher - I don't own the trope - but following the SAME ORIGINAL STORYLINE is not okay [with me]...

The parts after "Keep reading" consists of photo 'evidence' of the similarities (some are less obvious but I'll mention them regardless). It is LONG because I have a lot to say.

LRPD was published May 2, 2023, their story was published August 14, 2023.

Fun fact: Few days ago, I created a separate masterlist for the series and few days later, they did the same thing.

: ̗̀➛ Example 1 - Leon sits on the chair

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 2 - Could've been a...

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 3 - Leon's absent from his daughter's life, especially from her school activities, and teacher!reader saying that he should be more present...

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 4 - Leon snaps because the kid's mother is mentioned (also mention of him having his arms folded during the meeting which the other person mentioned earlier in their work)...

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 5 - Leon invites you to dinner instead of attenting the school event…

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 6 - Aunt Claire makes an appereance (mentioned only)

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 7 (NSFW) - Teacher!reader worried where is Leon's kid during heavy make-out session that leads to s*x (they did wrote a full original smut scene, which I skipped so idk if there are any familiarities; I have decided that a full smut scene doesn't do it for me in this story)

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 8 - Morning after

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 9 - Leon's apartment description (they basically just simplified my abstact, "show, don't tell" description)

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 10 - Aunt Claire calls to tell Leon to pick his daughter in the morning after

My story (LRPD):

Theirs:

: ̗̀➛ Example 11 - AND Miss Teacher's significant petname has an alternative but also makes an appereance (in the same formating on top of that)

My story (LRPD):

Theirs - NSFW (alternative + miss teacher):

They were smart by rewritting it in their own words but it still lays heavy on my chest that a story I have crafted for WEEKS has been taken from me like that. It's more glaring if you read both stories instead of me splitting it into excerpts (and I didn't insert all of them as there is a limit to pictures per post).

Taking inspiration or straight-up rewritting someone's detailed idea is a difference.

Sources:

[1] https://www.ox.ac.uk/students/academic/guidance/skills/plagiarism

[2] https://www.wattpad.com/128409012-how-to-write-fanfiction-plagiarism-vs-inspiration

[thekingofthenameless]

Is Arthur a character in TKN, and if he is, what kind of role does he play? I know Uther is the Villain King of the story, and I was curious on how you planned to portray Arthur, if at all? 👀

Thanks for the ask! :D

For reference, this is Uther’s appearance in TKN!

He may look cool, but trust me, he’s not a good person at all.

He’s charming (superficially), lacking empathy and a sense of guilt, a pathological liar, inclined to psychologically manipulate, bold, impulsive, narcissistic, arrogant, inclined to violence…

The list goes on, and it’s because he’s a psychopath. The word is overused and misused, but I mean it in the (current) true definition. It can be caused by “genetic and environmental issues, such as neglect or abuse by parental figures”, from Wikipedia’s article covering it.

A few risk factors are also “family history, parental neglect, abuse, or psychological manipulation of the affected child”. And depending on how I characterize his father, Constantine (The Third possibly, but idk lol), he could’ve been a sweetheart who was abused into becoming a monster, or he was the monster all along.

Either way, he destroys everyone around him, intentionally or not. He harbors secret hate towards Merlin and Charlie, because neither of them are like him at all, besides both being blatantly magic.

Realizing there’s so much I haven’t thought about…

Back in Daylight’s Redemption: Emerald Embers, Merlin had been living at Camelot for 100 years when the story started (separated from Charlie at that point; I’ll say more about that in a different post). The order of the kings I had was Vortigern, Constantine, Uther, and Arthur. Vortigern is the only one who isn’t explicitly related to them, but he was who I was going with.

The order of the kings still makes sense to me? But I don’t know how long Merlin and Charlie would’ve been living at Camelot before “present day”. T_T

Anyways, Uther is a sun coded character, like Merlin is subtly moon coded with his earrings!

Camelot has the sun as its insignia, making Merlin’s moon motifs seem like he’s rebelling against the royals’ authority. (He is. Secretly.)

Merlin actually had moon motifs back in Daylight's Redemption, to match Morgana! But when I started The King of the Nameless, I wasn't sure who the brutal sun character would be for a while, since at the "beginning" of the story, Morgana isn't even alive yet. And of course, she isn't the Morgana from Tales of Arcadia. (I'll talk more about her later.) Ignore the tag for Morgana lol; that's for ToA's version, not mine.

Finaly had a stroke of genius and decided it would be Uther! That was before he'd been designed lol, so now that he was going to have that coding, I wanted to finally give him one.

It was... difficult. He was being a bitch to design along with just. being a bitch in general. Forgot he was supposed to be 25, so I kept making dudes in their 40s in the game Dragon's Dogma, and I also couldn't decide if I wanted him to be handsome or ugly. To past me, “the first option would show that evil people can be handsome too, but I don't still don’t want people simping for him. The second option might make it unintentionally seem like 'Oh of course he’s evil! He’s ugly!’”

Made a poll asking if I should make him handsome or ugly, and handsome won! After that, I think I finally gave up and commissioned Merlin's first artist, using some references at the bottom of the post.

That's how his design finally came to be!

Then after that, his backstory that I really need to update at some point went through multiple revisions.

Idea 1: Listened to “Monster” from Epic the Musical and thought of him not always being evil until his father died; (magically related, presumably) he saw his brother, Aurelius, who was the older brother and king at this point in time, struggling under the weight of the crown and blamed it on magic doing this. Then as he grew up with Merlin as one his mentors, he realized that Merlin was insane (read: mentally ill) and felt like he was losing him, and presumed his magic did it to him.

His brother died, and his feelings towards magic taking everything from him only increased. Logical solution is, of course, eradicating magic completely so no one else would get hurt because of it (and starting with murdering Merlin). I had no idea how that would fit in with Igraine.

I didn't want to retcon Uther’s character, but I also thought a kind character becoming a monster was peak. I had no idea who a different character could be though.

Idea 2: Constantine sucked ass and Merlin basically raised Uther, but the latter's biological father still managed to get into Uther’s head that Merlin was crazy. That cued the complicated feelings of not wanting the one who raised him to die, while also thinking he needed to be put out of his misery so he wouldn't suffer anymore, and the misguided offspring betrayal. Seemed like a tragic villain at this point, and once again couldn't figure out how to make Igraine fit. He also started planning the magical genocide behind Merlin’s back because he knew that Merlin would never agree, and his reasoning was that magic took his father and brother, and he wouldn’t let that happen to anyone else.

Idea 3: Make Aurelius the asshole brother to fit the previous two ideas. Or Uther was still an asshole and he was dead. Or he faked his death or something.

@danhengsbestie and I got mixed up while talking about the third idea, and she thought I meant make Uther good and Aurelius evil, but I meant keep Uther evil and Aurelius good. She liked his design and though he could be a good guy, and that I could give him a more heroic treatment. I disagreed because if you know what he did to Igraine (and Gorlois afterwards) in the Legends, then you know.

Made another poll. Uther won, so that's what I kept.

If anyone wants to hear more about Uther, and Igraine, Gorlois, and that whole situation, send me an ask? 👀 There's some dark things there so I'd put it in a separate post so people can avoid it if they need to. Also this is getting a bit long even without their designs and things...

Ending Uther's bit with this: something funny about Charlie’s personality changing is that at one point Uther hated him for “being like him (and he doesn’t realize it)” but now their personalities are vastly different lol.

Compared to Uther’s above traits, Charlie’s serious, brave, protective (of Merlin), compassionate (towards Merlin), as well as fierce but loving and loyal, who sometimes takes a little bit longer to care about people than Merlin due to personality differences. He'll readily state his opinions and start arguments without caring, as well as having no qualms about staring people down while gauging their personality and threat level. Was at first completely normal but is now Fucked Up too.

Arthur:

I... have no official design for this dude yet. But like in many of the Legends, he's the son of Uther and Igraine! He's also the older sister of Morgana.

These are just a few of his portrayals in media, in order: King Arthur by Charles Ernest Butler, N. C. Wyeth's title page illustration for The Boy's King Arthur (1922), The Sword in the Stone (1963), The Quest for Camelot, Once Upon A Time, Merlin (2008), and Tales of Arcadia.

These are a couple of beta designs I made before I realized I wanted him to look younger, like his father, and these are also from before Uther got designed lol.

I also made a couple of Picrews for him, but now when I look at them I'm like: "Why are you white."

Because this is the color swatch I picked directly from Morgana's skin, and while her original artist said she could be any race or gender I wanted since she was designed to be ambigious, I went with her being Greek after @honeyxmonkey suggested it!

Decided to attempt another design for him while making this post, and I'm not set on it, but for now this is him lol.

I think he looks like Krel from Tales of Arcadia. 💀

Anyways, onto his portrayal!

Or former portrayal. Apparently most of this is not updated information. I'm so sorry to disappoint lol.

Some of this is a combination of Daylight’s Redemption and TKN content.

DR, January: I was thinking about Arthur struggling with trusting his magic his whole life because of Uther’s upbringing, in spite of Merlin and Morgana proving that magic can be good instead of doing an abrupt 180 as soon as Guinevere dies. Because most fics either have him hating magic the whole fic regardless of logical timelines, or have the 180, but I was thinking the struggle would be interesting because it contrasted Gwen, who’s loved magic her whole life and he loves her, Merlin, and Morgana enough to keep trying to fight his father’s opinions drilled into.

Then it’s all thrown down the drain when Bellroc stabs him and the Order makes him the Green Knight.

And Gwen dying also pushed him over the edge of after all his trying and launching the genocide out of grief despite Merlin and Morgana’s pleas.

TKN, January: Despite me starting to change the newly titled writing into a book, Guinevere was still dead due to magical means, and Arthur still started the genocide out of grief.

February: I realized Merlin being more open with his emotions meant he actually told people about his visions, which made it even more gutwrenching when Merlin told Arthur about his vision of the latter committing the magical genocide, and he was so grief stricken he did it anyways because he felt like Uther was right about everything he taught him despite him being dead for years at this point.

March: He was going to be one of four of Merlin’s adopted kids: him, Guinevere, Morgana, and Mordred. Which is very weird compared to now, where Merlin only has Charlie as his adopted kid lol. I’ll elaborate more on him and Charlie in an ask @gaylightisminetocommand sent!

Arthur was adopted first because Uther was severely lacking as a father figure (to say the least). Guinevere came to Camelot every summer to hopefully become friends with Arthur because the two were betrothed (Swan Princess, anyone?). And they did bond pretty much immediately! Morgana was adopted because at that point, she also lived in Camelot, and Uther was just as amazing with her. Same with Mordred.

Currently: Something that will stay the same from my most recent version is Arthur being nicer than some portrayals, such as Once Upon A Time, where, according to the casting call, is “a good and just ruler who, beneath the surface, is a master manipulator who can carry a grudge to the grave, and maybe beyond. He harbors an eternal burning love for Guinevere that can lean toward being a bit... controlling.”, or Tales of Arcadia, where he enacts a magical genocide after Guinevere dies. (Back then, this was because of Merlin’s influence, but if that stays the same Merlin will be more of a mentor figure than a parental one.)

Also, Mordred is still going to be related to him, but he isn’t his son like the Legends. Especially not through his mother being Morgana (or Morgause depending on the version). They’re both Arthur’s half-sisters, and there won’t be any incest in TKN at all. Mordred also won’t bring around the end of Camelot lol. I think.

Also also, he’s a great older brother to Morgana, and he and Guinevere actually have a wholesome marriage! He never has any lovers besides her, and they rule Camelot as equals.

To apologize for the lack of information, I’m also going to yap about Guinevere and Morgana!

Guinevere:

I actually have more of a set design for her!

I could've SWORN she's usually blonde at first, so I made that design first, but most images I found depict her with brown hair. So now… I can’t decide if I like blonde or brunette better. 😭

Back in January, when I was first coming up with new ideas, I thought of Morgana being a teenager instead of a grown woman like usual, and at this point, she was the child produced by ahem. The if you know thing. Her being so much younger when Uther died and being the result of the Uther thing™️ instead of Arthur caused her a lot of insecurity, but Guinevere didn’t care about the circumstances of her birth because it wasn’t her fault, and basically became an older sister to her. When she died, Morgana was shattered.

Debated on if I was going to keep her dead or not as I went through more revisions, and finally decided not to :] She’s gonna live!!!

Back when Merlin had four kids, I was debating on if he possibly would have three instead, since her just coming every summer might not be enough for him to be a dad to her. At the very least, they’d have been friends.

In her current version, she still loves Morgana, and she’s an older sister figure to her like before. And a line in God Games from Epic: the Musical applies to her: “Never once has he cheated on his wife”. The Lancelot affair destroying the round table doesn’t occur, and we love a loyal queen!

Morgana:

Like Merlin, she’s gone through a few design changes.

This was her first design! And I still think she looks cute :) It’s very different from her current one though lol.

This was way back when I first started TKN! I was thinking of inverting Arthur and Morgana’s usual designs, and making him have black hair, and her have blonde hair.

I’ll go through her ton of backstory changes like Merlin and Charlie first and reveal her design at the end!

As I said, originally, she was Uther’s daughter produced by that, a bastard child because Uther wasn’t married to her mother. He hated her because of it, even though it was the consequences of his own actions.

In the og Arthurian Legends, the result was Arthur, but I forgot which sibling it was, so I had to Google it, and I also wanted Morgana angst. Uther also treated her like shit for having magic; she was eight when it first started.

He only let Merlin train her in magic so she wouldn’t become a monster, but unbeknownst to them, he was secretly sending assassins in attempts to rid himself of her (and he might have done it to Merlin too).

Also I wasn’t very smart lol, because then I couldn’t decide if she or Arthur was going to be Igraine’s child but… in Arthurian Legends they’re both her kids. I thought they were half-siblings through Uther, not her. That’s part of why Morgana was the bastard child first, but then I couldn’t decide which one it was going to be, and apparently. I didn’t have to and I’m just stupid.

Like how I forgot Arthur was the original child by Uther in the Legends. 😭 But in my defense, I may have been thinking of BBC Merlin where they were actually half-siblings through Uther.

After my realization, I was thinking about how Merlin would become Morgana’s surrogate father because of her being Igraine and Gorlois’ daughter, and Uther wouldn’t have any claim to take her to Camelot that way; so maybe they would actually die of old age later on, and then she was taken to Camelot. (Uther was possibly still alive because he was forcing Merlin to keep him immortal. Idk. Or Arthur and Gwen were ruling Camelot by then and he wantsd to take in the half-sister he’s never met.) So anyways, she latched onto Merlin because he was nice just like her parents were, and he was magic just like her, and as much as her parents had loved her, they had never known what it was to be magic in a world that hated you.

But then @danhengsbestie said killing them off was rude lol.

Then I thought that maybe actually she could start coming to Camelot every summer or something so Merlin could teach her magic. And then she has three parents.

When Guinevere dies, she and Arthur were both heartbroken, and her grief got even worse when Arthur launched the genocide against magical beings despite her and Merlin’s pleas.

She couldn’t take being in the castle after Gwen’s funeral, and she goes out to the forest, where my equivalent of the Arcane Order at this point found her.

“Nari” sensed her soul and how much pain she was in, and they decide that her grief and young age makes her a prime target for them.

They easily manipulate her into being their pawn, and the “fight” between Merlin and her was him getting her to stand down after he tells her who they truly are.

But no one else was taking her unintentional betrayal well…

Well, that was wild. It’s gonna get even worse with Merlin and Charlie’s post lollll.

Another idea I had was Morgana getting a prosthetic arm later, like how ToA Morgana got the prosthetic hand.

And a day later, I found an adoptable that I decided was perfect! I was so glad they (designed to be an ambiguous gender as well as race lol) were still available, because I would’ve been crushed. 😭 I couldn’t believe nobody had snagged them.

They didn’t have a name either when I got them lol, but I saw them and I was like “Ohh that’s beautiful!! WAIT THAT WOULD BE A PERFECT MORGANA DESIGN”

I thought it was hilarious that I had the idea for her to have a prosthetic arm and then not even a day later bam. art.

I still have to figure out how she loses her arm and part of her left ear, along with getting the scars on her face.

The one thing that’s stayed consistent about her is being a lesbian! :D Like ToA’s is.

Back when Uther was still her stepfather, I had an idea for him being so despicable that he yelled at Morgana after she lost her arm for being that “careless” when she’d just woken up at Camelot after passing out from the blood loss and being bandaged up. Yeah that definitely won’t happen now.

I wasn’t actually going to make her Greek at first, but when I was making a reference sheet for her, her skin color came out as various shades of brown when I used a color picker tool. Before, I thought she was white because of the lighting. I thought it was my mistake, so I asked her original artist if he had a possible race for her, and he said I could decide.

Like I said, @honeyxmonkey suggested her being Greek after saying she looked vaguely Latina lol, and I ran with it! I also made a few Picrews of her during the figuring out her race part, and you can see how she changed! The third one is actually still a little bit lighter than her color swatch lol.

Oh also, she gets a familiar eventually! :D Her name is Willa!

Since Charlie is one of the biggest animal familiars currently existing, she’ll definitely be smaller than him, but other than that I don’t have a current size for her lol.

Artist credits: Soberana Art (on Artstation) MuriWorks (on DeviantArt), inn13art (on DeviantArt)

Picrew credits: brightgoat, romanapologist/hotvanilla, baydews

Links to their individual posts, if applicable: Uther reveal, Original Uther concepts, Uther design poll, Uther moral alignment poll, Original character, (1, 2,) Young Arthas Menethil, 3rd Uther reference), King Arthur, N. C. Wyeth's illustration, The Sword in the Stone Arthur, The Quest for Camelot Arthur, Once Upon A Time Arthur, BBC Arthur, ToA Arthur, ADOPTABLE - Machine Amongst the Flowers (on DeviantArt) Willa (on DeviantArt). (also a few more links throughout the post lol)

Taglist: @gaylightisminetocommand, @the-arson-author-gamer, @honeyxmonkey, @danhengsbestie, @falki-of-the-vanir