#Malec angst

[sky-neverending]

read and kudos it here

warning: MCD (not graphic)

Alec wasn’t able to scream before he hit the ground. He felt the moment the blade lodged itself into his side, piercing through the skin. He felt his balance slipping from him, the rocks under his feet sending him onto his stomach. But no words left his mouth, not until it was too late. 

Magnus must have noticed the sound of footsteps behind him grow quieter, because he shouted as he got further and further away. “Run!” he yelled, looking over his shoulder. 

He froze. And the next thing Alec knew, everything around him was exploding, and the person chasing them screamed in agony. 

As Magnus ran toward him, the uncontrollable gleam of his cat-eyes faded from the exertion of his power moments before. “Alexander,” he called, falling to his knees. “Alec, are you alright?”

Alec wanted to lie. He wanted to say that he was fine, that all was well. But he couldn’t. “No,” he choked out instead, hissing as the wind blew across the area he was injured. “Help.”

Magnus furrowed his eyebrows, raising his hands above Alec’s body to try and heal the wound quickly. But the more he tried, the worse it got, and Alex shrieked in pain. 

“I-” Magnus began, tears forming in his eyes. “I'm so sorry, Alec. It seems the blade was laced with some sort of poison.” Pausing, he placed a gentle hand on Alec’s cheek, lifting his head upwards. “I… I don’t know if I can do anything in time.”

With a nod, Alec sniffed. “Hey, Magnus?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.” 

The words felt bitter on his tongue, not because he didn’t mean them, but because this was the way he had to confess his feelings. Bleeding on a pile of pebbles, poison slowly killing him from the inside out. 

Magnus shook his head. “Don’t say that,” he said. “I’m going to get you help.” He started to pull away, to stand up and look around for anything that could be useful. 

But Alec only pressed his lips together, weakly pulling Magnus back toward him. “I love you,” he repeated. 

Fully crying now, Magnus looked frantic. “No. No, I won’t lose you.”

“Just give up, Magnus.” 

“I won’t,” the warlock sobbed. “I won’t let you leave me.”

Alec frowned. “Do you love me?”

There was a pause. “Of course I love you.” Magnus said softly. 

Nodding, Alec pulled himself upward, lacing his fingers together behind Magnus’s neck. “Then let me go.”

And Magnus did, hand brushing over Alec’s cheek to give him a painless death. “I love you so much, Alexander.” 

Alec died with a smile on his lips, holding the words close to his chest.

[alesardesign]

KitTy drawing!

Kit with his usual outfit and Ty dressed as a Centurion🤩

I love Ty’s uniform

I hope you like it🫶🏻

@cassieclare1 ‘s characters

[lawsofchaos1]

Malec Promptlet: Undercover!Circle Soulmate AU

Alec is the eldest son and the acknowledged heir of two prominent, highly-ranked Circle members that are openly known to have recanted Valentine’s ideology in name only. When Robert and Maryse begin leaving the Institute in Alec’s care when he’s fourteen it becomes clear that Alec isn’t relying on his bloodline alone and is going to be an immensely powerful member of the Clave in his own right. 

The Circle would be utterly foolish not to recruit the Shadowhunter who is absolutely certain to become the next Head of the New York Institute. Especially when it becomes evident that the Shadowhunters of the New York Institute would lay down their lives happily for their beloved young leader. Whichever way Alec turns in this war, so too will New York. 

By the time Alec is 22, he has gained complete control and his full investiture as Head. He is brutally competent, ruthless in the protection and training of his people, and, beyond all else, utterly without prejudice in his application of the Law.

The Circle, misreading Alec's motivation entirely, sees what they believe to be their way in. In truth, Alec despises applying the Law as it is written, hating how unequal it treats the Downworld. His rise up the ranks in the Clave's legal qualification system far surpasses the requirements of his position and sets the stage for him to have authority to assist in changing the laws themselves. The Circle believes it to be with the goal of further subjugating the Downworld, just as Maryse and Robert would have taught their eldest son and heir.

And so Alec, deep in the midst of researching the legal permissions that would be necessary to lawfully establish a Downworld Council, instead receives a recruitment offer from Valentine. Valentine, whom the entire Shadow World believes dead.

The resulting meeting with Caleb Sunshade, the Head of Alec's Intelligence Department, results in a streak of oaths that leave Alec with his brows raised, impressed despite himself at Caleb's creativity.

Caleb, and all Caleb's people, absolutely despise Alec's plan. But, two days and far too few hours of sleep later, they agree his plan has the best shot of achieving their aims. The damage Alec could do to the Circle with full access and proof of their activities is beyond anything the Clave has managed in the past decade.

So Alec goes undercover in the Circle to bring them down, maintaining a hard-won balance between gaining their trust without being forced into the very acts he's sworn himself to stop. (Caleb and his people certainly earn their overtime the months Alec's plan is in action.)

However, one cold December day, Valentine summons Alec to his ship to assist in interrogating his latest batch of prisoners. Alec makes short conversation with the 'welcoming crew', never so grateful as to be known across the Shadow World for his lack of care for social niceties. No one expects him to be friendly, focused as he is on a task, and he escapes the Circle members on the deck quickly to walk the familiar path to the brig.

He eyes the guards on the doors as he passes, scowling at their care in searching even him before being granted entry. This is the only prison he's yet to find a means for subtly ensuring the occupant's escape and it galls him. But, this is where Valentine makes his home and the security unfortunately matches the importance.

Only one cell is occupied and Alec moves to it swiftly. His stele is drawn to let himself in, the prisoners always secured to the wall in double surety, but he pauses the moment his eyes meet the warlock's gaze within.

The warlock is fiercely angry, cat-eyes luminous in loathing, and Alec is helpless but to shudder in a breath at the sudden agony emblazoning itself across his chest. Magnus, the warlock is Magnus Bane, Alec knows the mark of his city's High Warlock, is ethereal in his rage even as he hunches his shoulders inward to ward off the same pain he shares with Alec. With his soulmate.

The world goes quiet in Alec's ears, his pulse rushing as he feels their souls merge, feels their sigils branding over each other's hearts, linking them together in an indelible, unbreakable bond. Alec has prayed to Raziel since he was a child that one day he would feel such joy, meet his fated, has grown to believe with every year older that perhaps he wasn't meant for love, only for rule, and here, finally he has found his dearest and... and Alec is standing in front of him, unbound, in Valentine's prison.

"Shadowhunter," Magnus snarls, horror and despair in his eyes.

Alec swallows shattered glass, a slowly growing grief welling in his chest. He doesn't whisper the endearments he'd so carefully planned as a child, the years he'd believed his Fated to be merely around the next corner. He doesn't move to release Magnus' chains and draw him into his arms.

Alec is ice-carved and brittle as he forces down the bond he wants beyond everything else in this life and spits out, "Warlock."

To acknowledge that anything has occurred in the sight of Valentine's guards is death, and the sudden, cruel smirk in Magnus' eyes means he knows the brutal edge of that blackmail will cut both their throats if he lets it.

The grief in Alec's chest solidifies, piercing through any hope that Alec had thought to hold close to his heart those few, precious seconds before reality set in. There is nothing he can say, nothing he can do that will allow him to shelter in his soulmate's love.

His own mother had told Alec he didn't deserve the Angel's gift, and he'd been foolish to believe otherwise, if not perhaps for the same reasons as Maryse. His people have done too much harm, have spread too much hate and Alec, trying as is to do good, is nowhere near enough to offset that balance.

His soulmate will hate him. Even if Alec can tell him one day that there is a reason beside spycraft that he refuses to wear the Circle's rune, he is too dirtied by what he's done for peace to ever be accepted.

So when Magnus leans close to him in the midst of the upcoming interrogation, keeping just soft enough his whisper doesn't carry beyond Alec's hearing, Alec flinches at every vicious word when Magnus hisses, "A monster for a monster."

-

[INSERT HAPPY ENDING HERE with mutual forgiveness and the schmoopy, happy Immortal Husbands we all love.]

[After copious Alec-angst of him believing he's utterly undeserving of a soulmate, especially one so beautiful and kind and strong and perfect as Magnus, and also Magnus-angst of him dealing with believing that his soul's match is a Circle member after eight hundred years of waiting. Cat and Ragnor have tried so hard to convince Magnus that he isn't a monster after what his childhood and parentage proved him capable of, but he dares them to argue against it now. Also, we all know I am a SUCKER for Significant Kneeling and the reveal of Alec not, in fact, being a Circle member seems like a GREAT time for a little Significant Kneeling if you catch my visual drift there.]

[kasirose]

Prompt: 'A Window Into an Empty Room'

For the By the Angel Bingo hosted by the @malecdiscordserver

Aka season 3 episode 6. Or the episode I mostly remember as the one where Alec is real salty about a spatula and then gets drunk and rambles about Magnus XD

So I decided to take the prompt both kind of literally and also not?

This one took quite some time to finish as I've never really drawn an environment before but I hope it turned out ok! 🙃

[chrasilla]

angst prompts

"They won't wait for you forever. So you need to decide if all your resentment and pride is worth losing them for good."

"You're everything to me, but clearly I was just a short phase in your life."

"I just want you to be happy." "The only way you can make me happy is by staying far away from me."

"I miss you, but I miss me more."

"You from the beginning we had an expiry date."

"You shouldn't be with me. " "I know. Yet here I am."

"I must have loved you in another life." "But not in this one?"

"You could stay, for me." "That's not enough for me to stay."

"I always thought I'd be someone's first choice, but I'm not even in your top five, am I?"

"I love you, but I barely know you. I don't think you even know yourself."

[la-muerta]

this is the nonsense of love || MINDY NETTIFEE

The truth is this: My love for you is the only empire I will ever build. When it falls, as all empires do, my career in empire building will be over. I will retreat to an island. I will dabble in the vacation-hut industry. I will skulk about the private libraries and public parks. I will fold the clean clothes. I will wash the dishes. I will never again dream of having the whole world.

[ladyoflilies]

It could have been, but sadly it wasn’t. However, who’s ever idea this was, I appreciate the heartbreak you bring to the community. 

[rain-bowxx]

i need specific malec fics i want fics with angst that take place around s01/book 1 when jace and izzy go.around running around with clary leaving bigass mess and alec has to deal with it and him just being sick of it and snapping at them amd trying to make them see reason please please anyone?????

[onetimetwotimesthreetimess]

Hello! For the prompt thing can you write something fluffy about malec and the kids when they went to st barth's in SoBH. I know you have a fic and I love it and I want more of that softness

When The Stars Go Blue is my first ever fic and if it hadn't been that, I would have never discovered my love for writing tbh.

I tried writing the prompt that you asked for but WTSGB seemed complete to me, so instead of that, I wrote a one-shot on a small vacation LB's went to after Mina gets kidnapped (and found) in SOBH.

______________________________________________________________

“If someone interrupts our vacation this time, I am filing for divorce,” Alec mutters as he unpacks his bag.

Magnus being Magnus, unpacked his with the flick of a finger an hour ago. Alec likes to do a few tasks on his own, and so does he wants for the boys which is why he made Rafael and Max unpack their own, glaring at Magnus when he was about to snap his finger.

“On what grounds?” Magnus raises an eyebrow.

“On grounds that my husband is too kind and is always ready to help others,” Alec says seriously.

Magnus chuckles softly, “Those are not valid reasons for divorce.”

“I changed the law for you once. I can do it again,” Alec comments as he places the last of his weapons inside the cupboard.

Strong arms snake around his waist and Alec smiles, leaning against the lithe body. Magnus kisses his neck, making him sigh softly.

“What happened to ‘You wouldn't be the person I fell in love with if you didn't drop everything to help other people’, huh?” Magnus whispers in his ears.

Alec rolls his eyes and turns in Magnus’s arms, “I can stand by it and still be a petty bitch about it.”

The warlock snorts at the words as Alec wraps his arms around his neck. Magnus smiles at him sweetly and asks, “How are you doing, sweetheart?”

He pauses until he hears a loud bang from outside, signalling that Max and Rafael are up to something before replying, “I’m okay. You?”

“I just need them close to me for a few days,” Magnus admits and Alec nods because he gets it—he feels it too.

The need to have Rafe and Max close to them at all times after the Mina incident.

Alec cannot imagine what Jem and Tessa must have gone through when Mina was missing because just the thought of his kids missing has shaken the two of them, which is why, now that Mina is back, Alec took a few days off to be close to his family--away from the shadow world.

“Me too,” Alec whispers against his mouth before closing the distance.

It's a few hours later, he stretches his back slightly, even though what he really wants is to shake his legs which have gone numb because Rafael’s been sitting on them but Alec doesn’t want to move the boy. He can deal with numb legs for his kid.

“Daddy, pick a card,” Rafe whines as Alec keeps pretending to pick a card, only to stick out his tongue to Rafael in the end, who has been trying to show Alec his magic tricks for the past thirty minutes.

“Alright, alright. I will pick out a card,” he picks out a card and hands it to Rafe, who bites his lips as a thoughtful expression covers his face.

“What’s happening here?” Magnus enters the room with Max on top of his shoulders, making weird noises just because he can.

“I am doing magic, Bapak,” Rafael explains. “Like you.”

“Are you as magical as Bapak?” Alec gives Magnus a teasing smile as he asks the question and his husband rolls his eyes with affection.

“No one is as magical as Bapak,” Max comments as he jumps from Magnus’s shoulder onto the couch and Alec’s heart skips as the warlock boy stumbles a little but Magnus catches him easily, rolling him onto the couch, making him giggle.

“Max, careful.”

Magnus tickles Max and the boy lets out a screech, yelling for Alec.

“Daddy, Daddy!!!” Max shouts and jumps on Alec, who groans loudly.

“You two are going to kill me,” He groans. “I’m old.

“You are not even thirty,” Magnus rolls his eyes before a teasing smirk appears on his face and he bends down to whisper close to his husband’s face, “Maybe we should have used a stamina rune this morning.”

Alec’s cheeks turn red and he glares at his husband. “Magnus!”.

“Bapak stop trying to kiss daddy, I am showing him my magic trick,” Rafe reprimands.

Magnus scoffs indignantly, “He was flirting with me first.”

“Daddy is always doing that,” Rafe replies.

Alec just shrugs his shoulder because it's true—he’s always trying to flirt with Magnus.

“Okay, now tell me, what card did I pick?” Alec questioning Rafe seriously.

Rafael hums thoughtfully before he exchanges a look with Magnus. Then, he picks out a card and shows it to Alec.

Eight of spades.

“This.”

Alec chuckles inwardly but pretends to widen his eyes in surprise, “Rafe! How did you do that?”

Rafe’s face lights up and his smile widens, “I can do magic.”

“Rafe can’t do magic,” Max remarks.

“I can. Bapak taught me.”

Alec can see a fight coming from ten miles away so he pulls the brake on it, “Okay, okay. If Rafe says he can do magic, then he can do magic.”

“Like I be a shadowhunter?”

Alec and Magnus exchange a look before nodding, “Yeah. Just like that.”

“Alright, it’s time to for you two monsters to go to bed.”

Rafe and Max might not agree to anything but they both are on the same page when it comes to hating bedtimes.

They groan some more and Alec as usual relents, letting them stay up for another half an hour before eventually putting them to bed.

“So, is it time to use the stamina rune?” Magnus smirks as they get done with the second round, Alec falling onto his chest with a groan.

Alec grins at the words. “I don’t need the stamina rune. I can do this all night,” he says as he bites Magnus’s shoulder, pulling a soft gasp out of him.

“Really now?” Magnus has a mischievous smile on his face. “Let’s do it then.”

He arches a brow at his husband before relenting, “Okay. I might need a stamina rune.”

“I thought so,” Magnus chuckles as he kisses his sweaty hair.

Alec rolls his eyes, turning his so that Magnus can wrap him from behind, pulling him close against his chest. “As if you could have gone another round without some magic.”

“Stamina rune should be considered cheating,” Magnus comments.

“Says the man who is raising our son to be a cheater,” Alec points out. “You think I didn’t see that magic trick of yours.”

“I know you did. And I’m not raising him to be a cheater, I’m raising Rafael to be a con-man,” Magnus jokes lightly.

“Oh. That’s fine then,” Alec chuckles. “Con-man works.”

Magnus snorts and kisses Alec’s lips before snapping his fingers to get them clothed—perks of having children is that they do not have the luxury of sleeping naked.

He threads his fingers with Magnus’s on his stomach and they fall asleep wrapped around each other.

A few hours later, there’s a gentle touch on his shoulder that shakes him from his sleep. Alec runs his eyes gently to find his son looking scared.

“Rafe?”

“Daddy—“

Rafe’s teary-eyed which immediately shakes him out of his sleep.

“Hey, my baby. What’s going on?” Alec asks in the gentlest of voice as he shifts backwards so that Rafe can climb onto the bed with them.

Magnus rouses from his sleep as well and they both try to calm him down.

“Bapak—“ Rafe cries and Alec picks up and places their son between the two of them.

Rafe clutches onto his sweater and sobs against his chest, breaking Alec’s heart a little. He sends a worrying glance across Magnus.

The shadowhunter boy has a history of nightmares and they’re used to it but they happen significantly less now. It’s been a while since he had one.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Magnus whispers in the quiet room.

Rafael hiccups but eventually looks up into his eyes.

“Who took Mina?”

Alec’s eyes widen at the question.

“Rafe—“

“Did you find them?” Rafael asks before turning to Magnus. “Bapak?”

“We don’t know,” Alec replies honestly because Rafael knows more about things than most kids and he doesn't like lying to his son ever.

Rafael looks down with a worried face before hiding his face against Alec’s chest again. Alec cards his fingers through Rafael’s hair in worry.

“Mina is fine now, Rafe. She’s back home with aunt Tessa and uncle Jem and Kit,” Magnus says in a soothing voice. “Is that what you were worried about, love?”

Rafael hesitates before replying, “What if they take me next? Away from you?”

Alec feels a pit deep inside his stomach at the question. It’s a worry that has been plaguing his own mind since Mina’s incident.

To see his baby worried about that makes his heart hurt even more.

He looks up at Magnus in question, hoping for an answer.

Alec sits up and takes Rafael in his arms and Magnus shifts closer to them, a hand around Alec’s back and the other on Rafael’s.

“No one is going to take you away from us, Rafe. We won’t let them,” Alec assures him with utmost sincerity.

Rafe doesn’t look fully satisfied. “What if they still do? I don’t want to be away from you,” he admits in a shy voice.

Magnus brushes Rafe’s hair behind his ears and smiles at him. He takes Rafael’s small hand in his and kisses it softly, “If that ever happens, remember that daddy found you once. He can do it again.”

Alec blushes at the words, at the deep love he feels for the man.

“Rafe, look what I made—“ Max comes running inside their room and jumps on the bed.

“Blueberry, why are you up this late?” Magnus asks the small boy, who doesn’t seem sleepy in the slightest.

“Rafe had a nightmare. So, I made him this,” Max answers.

“Made what?”

Max pushes his hands together, as deep blue magic circles around his hand and a few seconds later, a small blue butterfly appears.

Rafael’s eyes widen as he sees this and a huge grin appears on his face.

“That is wonderful, Blueberry,” Magnus states and kisses the top of Max’s head.

Max pauses for a second before turning to Rafael. “Did Bapak and Daddy made it better?”

Rafael glances at the two of them before nodding.

Alec smiles before placing a soft kiss on Rafael’s nose.

“Come on. Time to sleep or we’re sending you two to stay with Grandma for the rest of the trip.”

“NOOOO.”

[mandulabogesz]

CRUEL PETALS

Malec Hanahaki fic

It's fully written. I have to finish the translation, and my lovely beta has to save my ass by checking and correcting it. Until then here's some sneak peek

(With happy ending...I can't k/ll him)

[alesardesign]

Not so gentle reminder that Alec said this in City of Ashes while he was going to rescue Jace because he thought that since he was gay he wouldn’t deserve to be buried there like other shadowhunters. He probably thought he was going to be buried somewhere at an intersection. Excuse me while I go cry.

[lawsofchaos1]

Shadowhunter Promptlet: Obeisance

In honor of the impending AO3 Shutdown Great Panic, please have a writing promptlet from one of my oldest journals. Fun fact: this is the predecessor to my angsty fic For Every Bird There Is a Stone. :)

~

When Alec is sixteen he discovers that his parents were in the Circle.

Not trusting any story they would tell him, Alec doesn't ask his mother or his father about their past, going instead to Alicante on official business and slipping the Hall of Records on his way back to New York.

Alec reads the file he illegally copied and is unsurprised to learn they were highly ranked- Maryse was one of Valentine's highest generals- and neither his mother nor his father stopped killing Downworlders without reason until it was made a condition of their parole.

Alec wishes he was surprised.

The file on his parent’s activity estimates the number of Downworlders they murdered and tortured, but no names are listed. The werewolves and the Seelie and the vampires and the warlocks are all left almost entirely anonymous, not even a cursory effort to identify them.

Alec reads every single word in both documents and discovers that there is one name contained in both, a single name that belongs to the only known survivor of his parent's wrath under Valentine's orders: a warlock that Maryse and Robert brutally tortured before his escape. Magnus Bane.

Alec is livid when he finds out that Magnus was never so much as apologized to, not even when he was later contracted by his parents to perform magical upkeep of the NYI wards after their parole.

When Shadowhunters have wronged another, the strongest expression of regret and repentance in nephilim culture is performing obeisance before the one who was wronged. It’s an expression of complete abjection and humility, acknowledging you (or one you are responsible for) have wronged the recipient and your punishment is in their hands.

In response to what he’s learned, Alec petitions the Clave for not only the Institute in full, but also the Headship of the Lightwood family.

Disgusted as they are by not only Maryse and Robert’s past actions, but also by their cowardice in refusing to take responsibility for their actions in the Circle and their present action in effectively leaving the Headship of the NYI to their son since he was fourteen, the Clave agrees. After the ceremonial transfer, Alec goes directly to Pandemonium. 

Magnus asks sarcastically if the new Head of the NYI is there to lay down the law or to make trouble. Alec doesn’t respond. Instead, he disarms himself, laying his weapons on the ground. All of them.

“Last week, I petitioned the Clave for Headship of not only the New York Institute, but also the Lightwood family. Both were granted, making me directly responsible for the future actions of all Shadowhunters under my command, but also for all actions of the Lightwood family, future and past.” 

Alec breathes deeply. “My parents, Robert and Maryse Lightwood, were in the Circle and believe wholly in the racist, genocidal doctrine preached by Valentine Morganstern. They committed unspeakable atrocities in his name to all factions of Downworlders, but when they spoke of their crimes to the Clave when requesting leniency, they only named the species of those they murdered and tortured without remorse. Except for you, High Warlock Bane. You, they named.”

Magnus was coldly imperious when he spoke. “Did you come to request absolution on their behalf, Shadowhunter? Because you certainly won’t receive it from me. Your parents slaughtered dozens for no other reason than their blood, and I will not forgive them.”

Alec nodded. “I didn’t expect you too. However, when I accepted the Lightwood Headship, the responsibility for their crimes became mine to bear. Although I know that this will be no consolation for you or for the friends and families of those hurt by my parents, you should know that I have ordered them confined to their home in Idris for the rest of their lives. They will never again bear weapons or act as members of the body of the Clave. They will never again harm another Downworlder. You have my oath on that.”

Magnus raised a brow. “A letter would have sufficed if that’s all you have to say.”

“No.” Alec paused. “Are- are you aware of the nephilim Rite of Obeisance?” 

Magnus paused for a fraction of a second, only noticeable to Alec given his closeness to the warlock. “I’ve heard of it, yes. It’s only been performed twice in the past century, if I remember correctly?”

Alec’s lips twitched sardonically. “It’s fallen out of favor since it requires admitting fault and accepting the consequence without possibility of appeal.”

Magnus’ own smile was cruelly amused. “Yes, I can see why you nephilim might not like that thought when the Clave hands out pardons to anyone with an old enough family name.”

Alec didn’t respond for a long moment. When he did, his voice was soft, but not hesitant. “Like they did to my parents.”

“Yes,” Magnus agreed, even though Alec hadn’t made it a question.

Alec closed his eyes for a brief moment in acknowledgement, then looked up to lock gazes with Magnus. “High Warlock Bane,” Alec’s voice was pitched to carry, his intonation suddenly formal. “As Head of the Lightwood Family, Maryse and Robert Lightwood now fall under my responsibility. They have both committed grievous harm to your person and have also committed grievous harm, including murder, to an unknown number of warlocks under your protection. Their crimes have not been punished by the Clave, nor can their crimes be fully addressed by anyone other than one harmed by them.”

And before the astonished eyes of all those present in Pandemonium, Alec sank to his knees, bowing forward until his forehead touched to floor in front of Magnus’ feet.

“As the one bearing responsibility for their actions, I give myself wholly to you in the fullest expression of remorse I can offer. In recompense for the harm done to you and yours, everything I have, up to my life, I give in offering to you.”

[ofexistencebane]

The Eye of the Beholder (Malec one-shot) for the wip game

This fic occurs in 2021 and is a cheeky little angst piece.

Someone has summoned a greater demon

So when Alec, Jace and Isabelle set off to deal with a seemingly normal lesser demon, they encounter something entirely unexpected.

Their disadvantage leads them to chaos, especially when the demon manages to bring an entire wall down… on Alec.

Upon return to the institute, Dr Alaric, the resident doctor, soon realises that when Alec was struck with debris, his retina was dislodged. Because of the severe damage the doctor would have to perform an enucleation.

Terribly insecure about his absent eye and newly chronic migraines, Alec grows increasingly tired and frustrated with archery, his children and regrettably Magnus.

~ The Eye of the Beholder ~

“He’s alright. He’s fine” Uncle Jace said softly, but with a unsure tone as if he were telling himself. Max knew his father had been injured many times, he’d escaped death and even demon realms in his lifetime, as Pa would brag about so often. Now it seemed very real, the stories and tales Pa often told at dinner, or just on the couch in mid afternoon. They all suddenly became very real, and very scary. And when Pa took him by the shoulders to lead him away, he let him, he knew his father was going to be fine, because he believed so. He was going to be strong like everyone else in his life. Like shadowhunters were supposed to.

“Did you keep the eye?” A little voice asked, causing the doctor to violently flinch. “My gods!” He yelped, almost falling over his feet. “You scared me” It was Max Lightwood-Bane, Alec’s son. “Sorry. Did you keep the eye?” He asked politely. “What eye?” “My dad’s eye?” “That is disgusting, child.” Alaric remarked, raising an eyebrow “No, that is a biohazard… plus there was not much to keep”

Of course I’ve left the good bits out, I’m hoping this will be 5 chapters if not more!

First chapter out on the 11th :)

[alexanderlightweight]

Malec prompt idea - misunderstanding angst. Probably Magnus thinking Alec is still in love with Jace

Thank you for the prompt! This is angst. There’s some recklessness. Mentions of canon typical: violence, self-harm, and canonical death and events. I hope you like it

—

Magnus loathes Jace with the fervor of a dying realm, and yet Alexander never seems to notice.

When Magnus is returned — has torn himself from Edom — he tries to stifle his instincts, but he fails.

But Alexander never pushes. He stays quiet, but steadfast in encouraging the trust that Magnus also inspires.

It’s hard, sometimes, interpreting the depth of Alexander’s emotions. And often, Magnus wants to ask, but also doesn’t want to hear the answer.

The fallout comes — though he doesn’t know it— when Jace is injured, again.

He’s been increasingly more reckless ever since Clary lost her memories and left, and it’s shown in how often Jace ends up in the infirmary.

Magnus has had a very, very long week and an even longer day and so as he steels himself to become exhausted in his efforts, he wonders bitterly, just who Alec loves more.

He feels both selfish and hollow, because Alexander came to Edom for Magnus, but the part that Camille tore out of him never healed. And it festers and is more painful every time Magnus lets himself wonder just how much his husband loves him.

Magnus reaches out a hand, magic beginning to gather and the magic dissipates as familiar fingers thread through his own.

Alexander is looking up at him, tired, but clearly relieved to see him. The bitterness Magnus feels is both confused and taunted and Magnus swallows down the whirlwind of emotions inside him.

Because Alexander almost looks worse than Jace, who is hooked up to so many tubes and IV’s and is a battered mess of bandages and bruises.

“I need you to do something for me.” Alec says softly, and Magnus sighs internally, but his hand is gentle as he cups Alexander’s face.

“Whatever you need.” Magnus murmurs and hopes he has the strength to follow through.

To his confusion, Alexander doesn’t seem pleased by his promise. If anything he looks more devastated.

“I, Magnus you can— no, okay,” Alec pauses. He swallows heavily and closes his eyes before opening them. His gaze is locked in on Magnus’. “I need you to portal us both back to the loft. Right now. And I need you not to ask questions until you’re done.”

Magnus is, quite frankly, both shocked and a little unnerved. But he pulls himself together and before anything else can surprise him, has them both in the loft. Magnus wanted to take them to their bed, but something tells him this is not a conversation to have in bed.

“What’s going on? Do you need me to go back to heal Jace?” Because Alexander looks like he’s about to break apart and Magnus sits in confusion as Alexander shakes his head.

“He’s healing and has been adequately treated. I called you after he was looked over by a Silent Brother.”

Magnus blinks in surprised confusion and Alexander makes a pained noise as he kneels in front of Magnus rather than sit next to him.

“You called me after Jace was treated?” Magnus doesn’t know why he feels so confused, but he is.

Alexander leans his head on Magnus' knee and plays with the rings on Magnus' hand.

“You know how to heal, but it’s not something your magic specializes in. I knew it exhausted you, but I didn’t realize it was because your magic specializes in other things until I read that baby warlock book to Madzie. If we wanted an emergency healer, we should have been petitioning Catarina and found a backup healer as well. Not that you haven’t done perfectly every time you were called.”

Something inside of him preens a little at the praise. Especially because Alexander is correct, and even though Magnus can heal, the bloodline of Asmodeus was never meant to soothe wounds, only to create them.

Not that Magnus has ever let his father’s legacy stop himself from succeeding the impossible.

“Magnus, you are my husband. You are Jace and Izzy’s brother by bonding. You are the partner of the highest ranked shadowhunter in New York. You are not my siblings or the Institute's personal warlock liaison. And you’re not Jace's personal healer, especially when he’s being so reckless on purpose. That you even deign to heal us is a gift.”

Magnus feels something in him crack open, the things he’s been burying — trying so hard not to upset the balance in the life he and Alexander are building together— flooding out.

Alexander is still talking, so sweetly. Earnest as he holds Magnus hands and Magnus, Magnus loves him so dearly and for once Magnus doesn’t feel like he doesn’t know who Alexander loves more.

“And, and even we really did need you. We would pay both an advanced healing fee and an emergency priority fee! As we should have been doing this entire time.” Alexander heaves in an unsteady, shaky breath and then continues.

“Magnus, do you have any idea how shocked I was when I asked Underhill if our budget for your services needed to be raised and he said there wasn’t one anymore! That it hadn’t been used since you crashed that stupid wedding so eventually they wrote it off!”

Alexander sounds heartbroken and quite frankly, Magnus is both too stunned to soothe him and some hidden part of himself needs to hear this. Magnus needs to hear how upset Alexander is on his behalf, and Magnus knows he deserves to.

“I thought.” And Magnus realizes he doesn’t actually know what he thought. He was so busy chasing Alexander while trying to still protect himself and also trying to figure out how to keep his people alive in back to back terrorism and wars.

“I couldn’t handle losing you.” Magnus finally admits, “and after I drove you away. I became that much more desperate to keep close to you.” Magnus takes a deep breath and then admits, “it’s why I broke so badly when you left me.”

Alexander lets out a wounded noise and kisses Magnus’ knuckles in fervent apology. Magnus is never happy that Alexander is in pain, but it soothes him every time he’s given proof that Alexander broke both their hearts that awful, awful night.

“In my rather ardent courtship of you, I didn’t really focus on anything but using any opportunity to see you. If it meant doing a little work pro-bono—“ and Magnus can’t help the cheeky wink he sends Alexander. It gets him a flustered huff and a pouting glare that disappears as Alexander kisses Magnus knuckles again. “Well, for me your company and well-being has always been my payment. And I considered it time and energy well spent.”

“Like I wasn’t constantly asking for you to come by for the same reason.” His Alexander mutters quietly. Magnus watches red trails up Alexander’s neck and ears and realizes in delight that his shadowhunter is embarrassed.

It’s adorable.

Magnus holds back a delighted titter because that will only pull Alexander into himself. And Magnus is enjoying this sudden honesty and introspection.

Alexander gives Magnus an almost snotty look — the same way he looked when he used to quote “the law is hard but it’s the law”— and continues with, “the difference is that I thought you were being paid at the same time. I didn’t realize the Clave was trying to extort you by pimping me out.”

Magnus can’t help the delighted and shocked laugh he lets out.

Alexander once complained to Magnus about how uncivilized the streets of mundane New York are. Apparently all shadowhunters are meant to have a crash course in the city they're stationed in, so as Head and Commander of the Institute, Alexander had to do research. Which meant finding out about pimps and mundane sex workers.

Before that, Alexander had only ever known about the Seelie, vampire and warlock pleasure houses. Which are completely different and in Alexander’s words at the time, “on an entirely different moral and ethical standard compared to mundanes.”

Every time Alexander and Cat have a little too much wine, they both start disparaging the mundane system and lament how much better it would be if mundanes treated pleasure and sex specialists with the respect they deserved.

So to hear Alexander so frustrated as to compare the situation with the Clave as similar to mundane pimps, was hilarious.

Alexander is smiling at him when Magnus finally gets a hold of himself. But there’s something sad under his smile and Magnus widens his legs and hooks his calves around Alexander’s back, pulling him closer.

“My heart, what’s wrong?”

“I want you to value yourself as much as I do, but then I found out about these things and I realized maybe you don’t know how much you mean to me.”

Magnus’ heart stutters in his chest.

“Alexander.” Is all he can murmur, breathless at the depth of Alexander’s words.

“When Jocelyn died. When I stood there and watched Clary grieve and thought that I’d murdered Jace’s mother. My orphaned parabatai who was given hope and I stole that, orphaning him again. When I could still feel her blood on my hand and the beat of her heart in my palm as we released her soul to Raziel. I didn’t pray to Raziel. I prayed to you.”

Alexander gives a bitter little chuckle and presses harder against where he’s cradled by Magnus’ legs.

“I didn’t even realize it at first. And it’s not an excuse. But it didn’t occur to me how much it could cost you to go to Edom. Because I didn’t think you would risk yourself so greatly, when I needed and wanted you so much.”

Magnus lets the confession rest between the two of them and then he greedily accepts it. Presses Alexander’s words to the still raw bits of himself that never fully healed when he went to Edom… because of Jace, but for Alexander.

“Jace is a part of my soul, Magnus, but he’s not the one who soothes and heals it. And a lot of the time he’s even the one who hurts it. So please, please say no. For yourself, and also for me. Because I’m too selfish, Magnus and we’ve both already given up too much. I lost you because I wasn’t selfish enough, and I never want to make that mistake again.”

Magnus knows how to set boundaries. He just didn’t… because he wanted too much to risk it by being careful.

Letting Alexander in, letting himself fall for a shadowhunter, it’s been the most painful but also the most rewarding, but from the moment Magnus let himself want; it has always been a risk.

But it’s always been a risk that Magnus felt was worth it.

“There is no one among my people that I can guarantee will prioritize both of our wellbeing. Not even in my family. I hate seeing you tired and when you’re in pain, I feel my soul aching, even worse than when I share Jace’s injuries.”

“Part of the reason I’ve never declined healing him, is because I don’t want you in pain.” Magnus tells his husband and he’s given a sad, weary but understanding smile.

“I know. But Jace isn’t going to stop. And I can’t keep letting him manipulate us both into lessening the consequences. I doubt he’s doing it consciously. But either way it’s not helping anyone.” Alexander takes a deep, steadying breath and murmurs. “I blocked our connection through the rune. I won’t feel his pain, and he’ll still heal, just slower than when you healed him.”

Magnus is more than shocked. “I thought you never wanted to block or numb the bond after the… last time.”

Alexander shrugs, a small gesture for the impact of his next words.

“This is hurting you. That’s more important.”

And Magnus. Magnus can’t take it and pulls Alexander up. His husband gasps in surprise and Magnus claims his mouth with a searing kiss.

They can finish the conversation later. Magnus and undoubtedly Alexander will both ensure it. It’s too important to not continue. But what’s also important is Magnus not spending another second not kissing Alexander.

Because Magnus knows now just how important he is to his husband, and he’s never felt more loved, or more powerful.

[lurafita]

Pondering Mini-Malec

AU Malec who met in kindergarten and have been inseparable since. Their relationship is super uncomplicated to boot. No pining, no "He doesn't feel the same way as I do", no misunderstandings that could be easily resolved by just talking to and being honest with each other. Being together and being there for and loving each other is the easiest thing for them. Everything else around them might at times be complicated, but Magnus and Alec never are a problem for each other.

They did long distance during college years, as their different interests were best suited for different universities. They talked on the phone, texted each other, and vistited whenever they could. While it wasn't a great time in their lives, it wasn't a horrible time either. Pretty much every challenge that other couples have to struggle through or are broken apart by, Malec just took in stride and mastered like champs. Their biggest fight was when they were 12. They couldn't decide on the family pet they would later have. Magnus wanted a cat, Alec wanted a dog. The fight lasted 5 minutes, and they compromised to get both.

[oriionours]

Ghost Of You

Here's my entry for the Malec discord server's 2023 mini bang !

Firstly, I'd like to thank my beta from the bottom of my heart. Cate, you were incredible. Despite my lack of communication from time to time, you've been exemplary, patient and I've loved every second of working with you.

My artist, Molly, who has done me the honour of illustrating part of this fiction with this magnificent piece of work

Then, a big shout out to the whole team behind this year's mini bang. The Malec discord wouldn't be the same without you.

Finally, thank you all for paying a little attention to this story. I sincerely hope you enjoy it !

I'd like to add that there are currently 4 chapters missing. They'll be arriving later today, I just need to finish rereading them!

Here I'm waking up

Still can't sleep on your side

If I can dream long enough

You'd tell me I'll be just fine

But I know better now

So I drown it out