#Making a little Kim shrine

[ushanka-kid]

I wanna use a 3d printer and make a miniature Coupris Kineema

[5oz-mud]

decided to hop on the trend of painting my own kim to hang on the wall. more wip pics under the read more!

[emberfaye]

For me,

Kim and Chay both love each other so much.

I'm very fond of couples who actually see each other. like, in a way that others don't. And yeah, we all know that Chay sees a side of kim not many, if anyone, does.

But I also think Chay shows an honest and true side of himself to only Kim, and that Kim offers just as much to the relationship as Chay does.

It's hard to tell in those little snippets of life we see after the "break up", but like.

Chay is a very lonely person. I know it's the common fanon that chay is popular and has all the friends and skills, but I honestly could see him being just as lonely as say, kinn or kim. Porsche is the outgoing one we see being social. all the times we see chay with people/friends, he's more quiet and reserved. I'd wager he has one friend (the one went with him to the open house and later we see doing his hair / out with this dudes friends vs chay's friends)

And Kim eases that loneliness just as much. And Kim takes care of him --- the polaroids paint a picture of him spoiling him with experiences Chay has never had--because he's been broke and on a scholarship so always studying.

Because so much of Kimchay can be hidden from the viewer, it's so easy to say that Chay is the only one who gave of himself, or offers something to Kim--

But I truly don't think that's fair to the characterization of a beautiful show. Kim gave *everything* he could to chay, to the point of getting back into a life he hated and had successfully escaped from (murder board aside) , just to keep Chay safe.

He allowed Chay to have a whole other home and life outside of Porsche. He eased Chay's worries and offered him comfort. Even when he was trying to investigate porsche and Chay, he was trying to be fair about it--snacks, offering up his own name to make the status quo even.

Remember the Wik shrine smile? Kim wasn't judgy, and he was always patient with chay.

Kim's capacity to love and change chay is equal to chay's capacity to love and change chay. I think they truly saw each other and healed each other. It wasn't one sided, not the love and not the affect that had on each other.

[yinwaryuri]

Omg this scene, if it can't be picked apart enough. Kim is not fooling around, and he is trying to make sure that the reason Chay approached him is due to his little celeb crush and not related to everything surrounding Porsche. He has to ask, has to measure the reaction, if Porchay is into anyone (knowing he's just seen the shrine in his room).

I love how amused Chay looks here. He's like, "I didn't think this would come up so soon, but I'll play. I'm good at this game." (the game being emotions)

It may be the translation, but it's hilarious that he asks "who is it?" as opposed to "what are they like?" Way to give yourself away Kim. You don't know a single person in Chay's life outside of Porsche and yourself. Porsche is Chay's brother, that's out of the question. The math isn't hard.

But I love, I LOVE this subtle little expression Chay does here. This quick eyebrow raise:

"It's you, you dumbass." My beloved exasperated gay boy.

That's what he'd like to say, but we gotta be chill, we can't rush the Wattpad formula. Chay has read those and they didn't satisfy him.

I mostly made this post over this tiny moment but it reveals so much about Porchay in a blink. Naïve he is not (not as much as many assume, especially on a first watch). Coming from someone whose younger brother is surprisingly well-adjusted and smart, compared to me (a bisexual mess), I love how Barcode portrayed this aspect of his character. We give Porsche a lot of credit for being a fantastic brother while raising him, but I have to give it to the kid, he deserves a lot of his own credit.

He proceeds to essentially flirt, skirting the border of admission so closely he can't really be mistaken. Just because he can't say it outright doesn't mean he has to be subtle. It's juicy shit and he knows it. He wants to leave juuuust enough plausible deniability in case it weirds Kim out.

I'm pretty sure it was this moment that made Kim decide to take Chay out of the investigation, but damn if he wasn't interested in this kid. He's already set himself up as a tutor anyway, he might as well enjoy it. When was the last time he'd enjoyed someone's company?

I'll start rambling if I keep following that train of thought, so I'll end things here, but. Porchay Kittisawasd, everybody. Tired gay hiding behind a cute shy smile and adorable voice, aware of exactly what he's doing at nearly any given moment.

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Chay takes his first sip of beer under Macau’s careful guidance when the last guest walks in, and the horrible taste of it combined with the sheer shock of the third cousin means most of it ends up sprayed down his shirt, and all eyes are on him as he coughs and desperately gasps for breath, and Chay wants to die. 

Because Macau’s cousin? Is Wik. Wik. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He manages to wheeze, while Macau laughs and thumps on his back. 

“What, you’re a fan?” 

Chay can’t very well say yes, seeing as Wik is right there, ten feet away, watching him with mounting annoyance as if he already knows the answer. Of course he does. And of course he wouldn’t want Chay anywhere near him, his family, on what is supposed to be a private vacation. God, what was Macau thinking, bringing him here?

“Who are you,” Wik asks. His voice is dry enough that Chay feels parched. He can breathe again, and he clutches his beer to his chest like a shield, and not like the thing that almost killed him a second ago. Or maybe that was Wik. Either way, Chay is in danger. 

“Our virgin sacrifice,” Macau says, because apparently once wasn’t enough. “This is Porchay, he’s my friend, don’t be an asshole. Chay, this is my loser cousin, Kim. Who, yeah, is also kind of famous, I guess. Don’t make it weird.”

“Hello,” Porchay says weakly. “I, uh… I really like your music.”

“Thanks.”

Chay feels a strong urge to apologize—and offer to leave right then and there, even if it means calling Porsche to drive the three hours to get him—but he doesn’t get the chance. Wik—Kim—is gone just as fast as he'd appeared, taking his guitar case with him. Strangely it isn’t any easier to breathe in his absence. 

“You’re an asshole,” Chay informs Macau. “You planned that, didn’t you?” His best friend’s shit-eating grin informs him that yes, he had. 

“Dude, your face! I thought you were going to die!”

“I wanted to! That’s so messed up! He’s going to think I’m, like, stalking him, or something.” 

“Nah, probably not. Seriously though, don’t be too weird, or he might kill you.”

Nevermind that, Chay might kill himself. How is he supposed to get through the next two weeks? 

***

Out of respect, Chay does his very best to avoid Kim and stay out of his way. He doesn’t know if the older boy notices, because of the aforementioned avoidance, but he hopes so. He wants Kim to know he’s trying. That he isn’t here to creep on him, that he isn’t one of those psycho fans. Yeah, Chay has a little bit of a shrine at home, but all of the pictures on his wall are from professional photoshoots. No paparazzi photos or creepshots from other fans. Nothing from his personal time. Chay isn’t like that. He doesn’t want to intrude. He just wishes he could explain himself. 

The opportunity comes the next morning. Chay is awake before anyone else; he kicks around in bed for a while, then goes to Macau’s room across the hall, but he’s still fast asleep. Chay isn’t comfortable enough to go explore, but eventually his stomach drives him in search of the kitchen. It’s massive, borderline industrial, and fully stocked to feed an army. It’s ridiculous. 

Chay is cracking eggs into a pan when he hears another set of footsteps, seconds before he’s greeted by Kim’s handsome, scowling face. He must have just rolled out of bed; he’s wearing soft-looking lounge clothes, barefoot, and his hair is just messy enough that it could be intentional, if not for the softness around his eyes. Softness that disappears as soon as they land on Chay. 

“... Good morning,” Chay greets, with an awkward smile. He turns back to the stove, trying to communicate I’m not watching, just ignore me. It must work, because rather than turn back the way he came, Kim joins him in the kitchen. 

“Hi,” is all he says, and Chay is content with that. 

There’s a fancy-looking espresso machine at its own coffee station. Kim takes up his post in front of it, grinding down coffee beans and pressing them into the filter. He takes down two small glasses and sets them beneath. Soon, the rich scent of fresh coffee fills the kitchen, the espresso machine's pop and hiss accompanying the sound of frying eggs. 

“Do you want me to make you something?” Chay offers, not turning around. 

“No.” 

Kim doesn’t say anything else. Neither does Chay. He chews on his bottom lip until his breakfast is finished, and he plates his eggs on a pile of sticky rice. 

This might be my only chance. 

“I hope I’m not making you uncomfortable. By being here, I mean,” Chay starts. “I swear I had no idea when Macau invited me. He said he was just coming here with his cousins. I-I wouldn’t have agreed. If I knew. I promise.” 

Kim turns to face him fully, leaning back against the counter. Chay fidgets beneath the weight of his gaze. “Really?” he asks. He doesn’t sound like he believes Chay one way or the other. 

“Yeah, yes, I wouldn’t want to intrude. I’m obviously,” he waves his hand between them, “You know, but like. You’re with your family. That’s not my business… Or anyone else’s,” he adds, trying to reassure Kim he isn’t going to tell anyone about anything that happens on this trip, without saying that outloud and reminding him it was ever a risk in the first place. 

“Hmm.” 

Please believe me. Even if they never see each other again—Chay will leave right now if Kim tells him to, he’ll figure it out—he needs Kim to believe this. That Chay isn’t another vulture trying to take more of him than Kim is willing to give, as if it’s something he’s owed just because he’s a fan. 

“Porchay, right?” Chay nods. “How do you know my cousin?” 

“We go to school together.” 

Kim looks at him doubtfully. Chay’s face goes hot, and reminds himself what Porsche told him before he left; just because they’re rich doesn’t mean they’re better than you, don’t forget that. 

“I’m, uh, I’m there on scholarship.”

“Really? That’s not an easy scholarship to get.” No kidding. Chay took a summer prep course for the entrance exam and that alone was almost too much. The exam itself nearly made him pass out. “What was your score?”

“Uh… One hundred percent.”

“Bullshit.” 

Chay flushes, equal parts embarrassed and something slightly less than angry. “They made me take it twice. The proctors thought I cheated the first time.” He didn’t. He’d spent the entire summer studying, because Porsche told him this is what he needed to do for his future. To make their parents proud. Chay never knew their parents; he just wanted Porsche to be happy, and to repay him for being such a good brother. 

“And you got the same score?”

“... Ninety-eight percent, the second time.” He was terrified, and that meant he made mistakes he wouldn’t have otherwise. 

“Still nearly perfect.” Kim regards him carefully, his head tilted, and Chay is too incensed to properly appreciate the flex of Kim’s bare arms across his chest. “Interesting.” 

Chay thinks that maybe, from anyone else, interesting might have meant impressive. 

Kim turns his back on him again, then, leaving Chay to eat his now-cold breakfast while he finishes his coffee. Neither say anything else. It’s painful in a way silence always is for him—to Chay, silence means loneliness, means sitting at home and waiting for his brother to walk through the door, bloody and beaten, or it means hiding from debt collectors—but Chay refuses to break it again. 

He also refuses to look at Kim, which is why he startles when a porcelain cup is set down in front of him with a delicate clink, a cappuccino with delicate-looking latte art and a dusting of cocoa powder. He looks up and Kim’s back is already to him again as he finishes making his own coffee. He cleans the espresso machine, puts away his tools, and leaves without another word, no doubt in search of a better refuge to enjoy his morning coffee, without Chay breathing down his neck. Even though Chay already wasn’t doing that. 

Whatever, it’s not like it matters. 

Chay picks up his latte. He’s a little bit mad at how good it is, blooming rich and smooth on his tongue, and not overly sweet. 

Like Kim, he thinks, glowering into the milk foam. 

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hallo!! What do you think sherlocks brain is like in Inside Out 2 form? I think he has a whole island dedicated to John :-)

Hi Nonny!!

Okay, so I thought long and hard about this, because I think it's really... timely you asked me this! You'll see why in a sec.

So, I haven't seen Inside Out 2 (I lost my Disney Plus subscription and I was wary about seeing it in theatres given how... disappointed their last few movies have been for me), but I generally know what characters are in it? Not enough to give you a good answer though.

BUT, guess what?

I literally just finished a couple weeks ago the game Disco Elysium, which is essentially an M-rated, ADHD-fueled, Inside Out for Adults, the Game. Seriously; the main character, Harry, is a high-ranking detective, and for an unexplained reason has 24+2 "skills" (which are essentially emotions) that talk to him almost constantly and help him make the decisions within the story after he had wiped his memory from a drunken, drug-fuelled bender. They are why he's great at his job, as "the city itself speaks to him". He even partners with Kim, who he pretty much imprints onto and it's LIGHTLY hinted, in the playthrough I did anyway, that Harry essentially changes because he wants to impress Kim and adores him (if that's the route in the RPG you choose to go. I'm SO UPSET I CAN'T ROMANCE KIM. I like to think that if they ever had got the chance to have done a second game, Kim would have been a romance-able option.)

The game itself is RIPE for a Sherlock AU: a brilliant drug-fuelled protagonist who can see things that other people can't who befriends a noble, loyal and reliable partner who is equally as insane but hides it better, and wants to change BECAUSE they care about their new friend. Said new friend is also ready to die for him on day one. After I played that game, I can totally see Sherlock's brain being more similar to that dynamic than the simplicity of Inside Out (NOTHING wrong with that, I just... DE really sat differently with me as a better way of showing how a neurodivergent mind works).

BUT to answer your question: YES, I DO think Sherlock has a John-Island (just like I believe in-canon Sherlock's entire Mind Palace altered after John's influence). I think he's got a whole-assed shrine in there. John on a little pedestal and everything LOL.

What a fun question! <3 Hope that this answer suits you! And give DE a try if you can; it's SO good and I'm currently super obsessed with it, LOL.

[ditch-lily]

Idolistic - titles and symbolism

Thanks for those who encouraged me! So here it is, idolistic chapter titles! Not all of them are symbolic, and some are obvious lol. But a few have made my brain light up in nerdery because I’m a little into connecting/crafting simple phrases into symbolism. Also puns (sorry). Idk if that even makes sense but, here we go!

Be aware idolistic spoilers for up to the latest chapter, chapter thirteen. Also warning for some of the quoted scenes, as they have canon typical violence.

Idolistic 

So, actually - I’ll start off with the fic title. We all know it’s a play on words/pun I figure. It’s a play on idealistic/and idol, and idolistic is the worship of idols, in a religious context. For me the title feels like it’s more Chay’s POV, which is interesting as idolistic is my Kim epic lol. 

But it’s that journey from having an idealistic view of your idol slowly turn into something real. Chay’s literal wall of idolatry (wik shrine my beloved) turning into Chay’s real interactions with Kim. So for Chay, it’s like Kim turning into a real boy, and all the unexpected scary things of Kim’s real life running into that idealistic view of an idol.

On the other side of it from Kim’s pov, the symbolism in idolistic is what he’s seeking from the world. He wants to escape into a singing career – an idol career. And he’s idealistic about all the things this world could give him, safety and normalcy. A haven away from his family’s world.

Also - being idealistic about something in my view doesn't mean what you believe is false, or you're being naive, it's just your hopes and dreams and what you want out of something.

Chapter 1. The mortifying ordeal of being known 

Uhhh alright this one isn’t all that deep. It’s just the meme. But it’s chosen for that spike of intense suspicion / fascination Kim gets when he stumbles across Chay’s stan account, and all the ways Chay shows he knows Kim without them ever having met. Like Kim is so into being known. What a little freak (affectionate)

Chapter 2. Dirty pool

This is a fun one! It’s a phrase meaning ‘underhanded or unsportsmanlike conduct.’ It's Chay cornering his idol and putting kittens on his lap until he’s too burdened down by all the tiny little creatures he’s got to look after to move. And then Chay smiling sunnily and going; hey, how do you know which school I went to?

And for anyone who’s like, Idolistic Chay is more suspicious than the show, one of the first questions Chay asked in the tutoring scene in kp was how did you know I have a brother. Kid knows!! But he’s like this is my beautiful babygirl idol? I am hanging out with him right now and if he’s a little weird? Okay that’s cool I don't mind, I like all sides of him :)

Okay also thanks jeff for now giving us literal photos of the scene

Chapter 3. Three times in the back, with a serving knife 

Okay, no this is just cluedo. Murder mystery Kim. Kim so into being the hot nightclub singer who gets to stab people on screen. Nothing deeper than that.

But thanks Jeff for also like giving me a visual ref after I posted that chapter. Helpful.

Chapter 4. The reel in 

The reel in is where I start playing with lines. This chapter title comes from a line in the previous chapter, here’s the whole paragraph:

The man was a loose end, his father didn’t have the right strings to pull at the right time. Kim had just had an interview, the T-pop segment, his face broadcasted to thousands of new viewers. The call the next day, the reel in. Kim can still feel the echoes of it, that night. The crack that reverberated through him, his hands. The pull on his muscles.

Chapter four is where Kim gets drawn back in on an errand. It’s the first time we see it on screen in Idolistic, rather than as a memory. This is the reel in, him being dragged back. It’s also playing double duty, the reel in, after the job is done, he’s almost magnetized and makes his way on autopilot to Chay’s house. 

So it’s both the worst part of his life, being drawn back into the violence of his family and father, but then it’s also the other side of it – one of the best parts of it, being drawn into someone else’s sphere, someone who he’s attracted to and wants to be around.

Chapter 5. Cupid's bow

Another link! So, this is the love chapter for me. The title links back to chapter three:

Chay gently traces over the shape of Kim’s lips, the tips of his fingers trailing across the bottom lip, then the top, gently pressing against the cupid’s bow.

And it’s playing on different notes in the chapter, but all the same theme. Cupid's bow – Kim is falling for Chay. It’s him reciprocating Chay’s interest, the return of affection, falling into the beginnings of love. It's Kim being shot with an arrow from cupid's bow. But its not just the metaphorical, it's also a physical real thing - the cupid's bow on the lips. So it becomes a real world expression of how Kim returns that affection. He doesn’t know how to approach it, so he echos Chay’s affection back to him, caressing him in return:

Chay’s eyes are dark and intent on his, his face flushed from kissing. Kim reaches up, tracing the evidence on Chay’s lips, an echo of Chay’s touch from last week– bottom to top lip, a press against the cupid’s bow, then lets his hand fall away.

Idk, it's just profoundly Idolistic Kim to me. He doesn’t know exactly how to express things, but he’s intently paid attention to how affection has been expressed and acted upon onto him. 

Chapter 6. Debts cleared 

This one I feel isn’t that deep. It does hit more than one beat I feel, but it’s not complex. Debts cleared is the act of Porsche giving up his brother and his way of life to leave and clear their debts, so Chay can live free of that burden. 

But it’s also Kim, learning that Porsche is involved with his family, and not understanding how/or why that’s happened.

That bit of it comes from this paragraph:

Porsche’s entry is there. The amount owed is large, but Kim stares. There is a small notation next to it. It means, debt cleared. Kim flicks his eye over to the corner of the page, quickly checking. If a kill order was given there’s usually another mark, just a small circle to indicate. 

While it literally means you are clear of debt, to Kim it’s like, my family does not just wipe the board clean of debts. That's not how this world works, so this is suspicious, and shows something else is going on here.

Chapter 7. The soft launch

Okay this one is silly and simple. It’s just a soft launch, which in social media world is posting an informal picture of your partner, without a formal announcement. It’s like hey what up I’ve been hanging out with this hottie 

Anyway forever proud of Chay and his game and the way that boy must have just shocked his fellow stan following by posting this pic of Wik. Like boy get it

Chapter 8. Choose your fighter 

OH THE RED HERRING the side accounts. So, when I wrote the first few chapters the side accounts and that aspect of the story was meant to be a little bit more of a core theme, but I just went in a different direction. I like the direction it went lol, but it really means Kim’s side account and the plot of that got scrapped.

What does that have to do with the chapter titles? This is the chapter both Kim and Chay choose their fighters for their upcoming battles. In Chay’s world at that time, his biggest concerns are his brother (who’s ‘away’) his suddenly complicated but amazing dating life, and then – the things that link back up to that, say, a certain side account who is releasing personal information on his new beau.

So, Chay who has freshly met Kim’s team and manager is like, hey I have resources now, and chooses his fighter – P’Mod, for his upcoming sting operation to oust the account leaking sensitive Wik information. 

It's really only shown briefly but here's where it went down:

By the time he gets back to the office it’s lunch time. P’Mod is at her desk, going through files, talking to someone on the phone. Her tone is serious, and Kim inches forward, eavesdropping.

She’s talking about the Riverfest leak. “That account has always been annoying.” She hums with agreement over the phone. “Yes, that’s true. But don’t worry too much, if the source really is that close it’ll be an easy job.”

She taps her lip, considering something. “Y’know, you’re becoming a very useful addition. But don’t stress too much kid, I’ve got it handled.”

For Kim, it's his battle with his father. This is the chapter he chooses to risk it and approach Vegas. He needs someone that his father wouldn’t suspect he’d work with, and that’s Vegas. 

Chapter 9. Three for three

So, this is a baseball term lol, but I never learnt it from baseball. Baseball…isn’t really popular in my country. But it means three things were attempted and the person was successful all three times. 

This is related to Kim being reeled back in, into a fairly violent and worrying errand. And its Kim’s instincts of no, I can do it. I’m fairly on the nose with it in the chapter lol:

He is good at it, he knows. He does like being good at things. And he’s always had a skill here.

There are nine men. A much better number than twenty. Survivable, if he's quick. 

There’s three on watch, three out the back counting merchandise. Three in the main room, smoking and drinking. Nice and balanced, and he's ready to see if he can do it. If he can go three for three.

And as we follow, he counts down the men until we’re at the end, with his self-affirmation of three for three: 

One left, running for the door. Kim sets chase, knees screaming at the speed. He leaps onto his back, teeth bared and breath heaving. He takes him down, rides him down to the ground with his arm around his neck and his knife in the man's side.

There. Done. Easy.

See? He can do it.

Chapter 10. Fools rush in

No fancy linking of previously written things for this one! This is our fools performance, our clown car full of Theerapanyakuls crashing into a wall lol. This is our chapter of secrets coming undone, and for me it really is Kinn and Porsche, crashing into Kim and Chay’s world. It’s the collision of secrets and brothers and relationships, both romantic and fraternal, and how that unearths everything.

It's also Chay getting to see how he may have rushed in, and thinking (oh poor baby) that he’s been made a fool of, after discovering everything that has been hidden from him.

Chapter 11. Outgunned 

Another non complicated one. It’s Kim being physically outnumbered by the men who come to kidnap Kinn and Porsche, but also being outgunned/outnumbered by the situation. He’s reacting to things, he’s not in control of anything. This is the aftermath of all his secrets coming out with Chay, and then the lack of control and power he has to save his loved ones when danger comes knocking at their door.

12. Three things to bring to a deserted island

Okay also not complicated! It’s a reference to the side ficlet, of one of Wik’s early interviews. Which then links to Tankhun’s little trivia challenge for Chay, where he successfully wins Kim’s hand in marriage. Not that he knows it.

Chapter 13. Line of sight

Okay I’m fond of this one! Line of sight is a phrase I’ve used for Kim referring both to Chay and Vegas, and his father. The way I use it, line of sight is a reminder to pay attention, both to things you love (Chay) and the things that could blindside you, and threaten the things you love (Vegas, Korn).

From chapter three:

He doesn’t want to show up to Vegas’s little pre-planned meeting, but it’s better to keep Vegas in your line of sight.

Chapter seven, referring to how his life is directly shaded out by his father:

All the spaces he inhabits, his apartment, his studio, they get shaded out in the evening. It’s from the sun, low on the horizon, stretching out the shadows from his father’s building.

A distance would be better, sure. But Kim’s always believed it's better to keep your goals in your line of sight.

And within this chapter, I went all in on it lol:

But now the real world is creeping back in, and Kim doesn't feel ready to not have Chay in his line of sight just yet.

And

Tawan has a gun on his brother, and Kim’s out of his line of sight.

He moves quick. A blur behind Tawan, sliding in between Porsche and his target. It’s seconds maybe, his signature move. He launches himself up, gets him around the neck. A sharp thrust of movement, a snap, and it’s done, Tawan collapsing at his feet.

So, this chapter is the consequence of Kim not paying proper attention to his sightlines. He should have noticed more of Vegas and his plots –in fact Kim is aware of them in my opinion. Not the particulars, just that they're happening, and he’s dismissed them because Vegas is always plotting, and Kim’s busy. But then he gets completely blindsided by Tawan, and gets wrapped up in that messy plot.

So, we get a Kim who reacts to Vegas’s plots, rather than foiling them preemptively. But also, it's not Kim’s job to monitor Vegas and his schemes against the main family. 

Back to sightlines, it’s also, keeping Chay in his line of sight – in the warehouse showdown, Kim is always aware of where Chay is, at all times. That's his priority. When he first wakes up, he’s like, get Chay out of the bad guys line of sight. And he does it.

But then it ends on a more complicated note. Kim is not being fully seen by Kinn, and he’s getting tangled up in all the family plots. Kinn is not paying attention properly and seeing the danger Kim is in, and deals with. Kim is not being registered in Kinn’s own sightlines, and that’s painful for Kim. 

So when Kim notices Tawan can’t see him, when Kim is ‘out of his line of sight’ and Tawan is also actively putting his brother in danger - Kim makes an impulsive decision. He wants to save his brother, but he also wants his brother to finally see him, and the violence that he has been a victim of.

It's Kim's own version of a confession, he puts himself directly in Kinn's eyesight and show's him what he's capable of.

Okay and we're done! Yes that was overly thinky and dramatic. I have too many thoughts. But I hope you enjoyed me being a ridiculous overthinker. Will future chapter headings have symbolism? Maybe, maybe not, it’s all a little in the moment when I think on the titles, so I guess we will see!

[emojellyace08]

Lookism Random Headcannons (Because why not?)

Read the recent chapter recently and I am excited about the King of Soul's entrance (if ever)

Daniel watches anime since he thinks it's more entertaining than dramas. At some point he also wanted to become a manga artist but quickly gave up on it. His favorite is probably the classics (Naruto, One Piece, One Punch Man, DBZ, and he also likes the recent ones.)

Zack and Johan used to watch WWE matches together while Mira scolds them that they scream too loud when they're watching Royal Rumble lmao.

Undertaker was Johan's favorite WWE wrestler but thinking about it makes Johan embarrassed since he doesn't want to be seen as an edge lord or "emo or a goth" lol. Zack Lee's favorites are probably Edge, Brock Lesnar, and Randy Orton (idk I watch a little bit of WWE in my free time don't blame me).

Since Jay lived mostly alone in his apartment for who knows how long, he was thought by his butler to cook his own food since he doesn't really want to depend on them fully and make them exhausted. (Plus he's mostly bored, so why not cook and bake?) He almost burned his apartment once trying to fry an egg at first.

Hudson might not admit it but he also binges anime like Daniel. He believes that Makima sucks and the ones who defends her are simps (I mean she's a well written antagonist but her personality is a no).

Goo Kim = Cat Girl/ Cat Boy enthusiast (likes wearing low-budgeted cosplays A LOT for his own entertainment).

Goo Kim had stolen Gun's credit cards for his own shopping spree. Not once, not twice, but MANY TIMES.

Samuel might not admit it but he actually likes Jake and Big Deal. He just keeps denying it because of his ego issues.

Jerry had once owned a winter dwarf pet hamster. He properly took care for it for like 2 years and named her Bisky. But since hamsters have short lifespans, it died later on and he cried and didn't sleep well the following days since he missed her deeply. The shrine of it is still staying still on his backyard and he mostly replaces the flowers everyday or i he's not busy to pay tribute to her.

Daniel wanted to learn how to play the guitar or a ukulele but since his mom was struggling with their budget he cannot ask her to buy him one.

Jay can play drums (and teaches Daniel when having sleep overs!)

Mary can play bass and a little bit of guitar. And she secretly listens to rock, metal, and the alternative style of music since she doesn't want to be teased as emo by Vin the asshole lmao.

Avril Lavigne is the reason why Mary dyed her hair blonde you can't change my mind (not forcing you but listen to her music IT'S SO GOOD). She would like to have a friend (if not a girl friend not a girlfriend) who shares the same music taste with her to start a band.

Zack and Vin Jin used to bully kids on Roblox to boost their ego (Zack stopped because of his character development but probably Vin still does it lol).

Younger Kouji had once ate lots of candies and sweets to be "smart like L" from Death Note but almost got diabetes.

Gun and DG wears lip balms to keep their lips plump and smooth. DG had once teased Gun about being a model while Gun just smirks about it.

Mira SECRETLY LIKES Ayesha Erotica's music because of the edits on TikTok but since it's mostly explicit she's refraining to add her compositions on her Spotify playlists.

Since Vasco is mostly hardworking, there are times that he passes the exams (with the help of Jace and other Burn Knuckle members). But he just cannot push himself more to pass the Mathematics exams.

Eli had once tried to kiss Warren after their fight because of his innocence and curiosity before all the Hostel Drama. (I personally don't ship them but I just feel like it's something past Eli would do). They both cringe when they both remember it.

Doo Lee was once a Twitter influencer but because of his past dramas he was cancelled in social media.

Jibeom accidentally smashed Jihan's face when they were little when they are trying to imitate WWE stunts. Jichang was surprised to see his little brother's teeth getting cracked and falling off and he just didn't cried (it was Jibeom who shed tears because of guilt lol).

Crystal is a big fan of "vintage-core" or everything around the older eras because she believes that it doesn't only represents the beauty and evolution of human pop-culture but it also represents history. She always won on auctions to buy antique stuff and mostly donate it on museums to preserve it's structure while she kept some on her room. She almost got canceled by bidding on an authentic Marilyn Monroe's lipstick but she later on posted on Twitter that she donated it on a museum (which is not a fake news).

Gun doesn't eat too much fast-food products because he believes it's unhealthy and has chemicals to make the customers' crave for more (Goo teases him about this by dramatically eating an order of a large McDonald's French Fries in front of his annoyed face).

Ryuhei never kissed a woman in his life because of his nervousness. He secretly was weirded out by it so he lies that he had slept with many women to not be bullied by other people.

Vasco doesn't know how to properly wear a watch and a belt (ngl same I'm that stupid). He also doesn't know how to tie his shoe lace.

Jace prefers dark-chocolate rather than milk or white chocolate. Because he believes that since it has more cocoa content it can boost more of his energy and sharpen his mind and focus especially when taking his exams and quizzes.

Sally's favorite color was purple as she planned to dye her hair with her color of choice with a mix of indigo. But since she's afraid that it won't suit her, she changed her plans and went on to dye her hair with strawberry pink. She didn't expected it to look magnificent on her since Warren complimented her, so after that her favorite color was switched to baby or strawberry pink.

Mitsuki thinks that K-Pop music is cringe but she secretly has BTS, Twice, and Blackpink on her Spotify playlists. Ryuhei found out about this and she was pissed off up until this day lol.

Doo Lee once had a girlfriend who uses him for the money. She later on cheated with a new "handsome and charming" guy and when Doo found out he was FURIOUS. He later on was captured on camera beating the dude and when people found out he was canceled again on social media (pretty privileges never ends). He later on begged Daniel and Duke to make an apology video for him which looks so weird and scripted since Doo was pushing them. But luckily the drama heated down.

Magami Kenta's favorite vape flavors are watermelon, strawberry, and coffee.

Joy is very talented and skilled with nail art and she sells her products in a decent price even if it's REALLY DETAILED and well-crafted.

Sinu Han is a COMIC BOY FAN. Whether it's DC Comics, Marvel Comics, or even manga he's going to buy it. He later on posted on Twitter about how Gojo shouldn't have died since he relates to him so much (he was later on bullied by Samuel that he sounds like a weeb lmao).

[wickedmoonlite]

KinnPorsche Rewatch 2023

Reminder: as we go into heavier topics in KP (dub-con/non-con, toxic behaviors, etc.), I will not be doing deep dives. I’m planning on taking this just below surface value as these are literally thoughts I have in the moment as I’m watching. Thank you.

Side Story Random Thoughts

Tankhun is so dramatic here. Fake crying and the whole time giving side eye to P like "he's really buying this?"

Why is this hospital so fancy though? K is sleeping in a queen size bed for goodness sake.

Ah yes, Vegas. Here to stir shit up.

I'm on vacation he says. I'm gonna sleep alone he says. Liar. Scared of fake ghosts (actually probably not fake, most hospitals are haunted for obvious reasons).

K, I think it might be slightly obvious that P is going to stay by your side. Come on now. But thanks for giving him a phone so he can talk to Chay at least. Damn.

Sweet little ending with a cuddle ❤

Episode 7 Random Thoughts

Iconic Pete opening.

The lighting in this episode is so pretty.

Porsche and Big really just focus on a guy with an earbud... Meanwhile, another guy just strolls up with a damn grenade. Honestly.

I love how all the people there are causing a ruckus because there's a grenade up for grabs but no one fucking leaves?? They just sit there and watch??? What are y'all doing?

I dunno, beating someone into a confession probably would be difficult if the person is particularly tight lipped. But Vegas walking over with a torture case? Idk, I think I'd rather talk than be tortured...

The look that Pete gives Vegas though. Somewhat intrigued, it seems.

Did he pull out a tooth?? What is that?

Gun always trying to out wit and out maneuver his brother. He has one hell of a complex... And gave his sons a complex. And abused them. And he has too many cravats.

The red velvet shirt though.

I actually really enjoy this scene where we see how differently the minor family operates. People greeting with respect as they walk by, but they're more relaxed than the main family's people are.

Vegas walking in and out of the shadows, the lighting in general.. It's... Telling in a way. Of what kind of character Vegas puts forth for his people but also of the darkness dwelling within.

I feel like for how many people most likely live in that complex, they should have like three of those long tables set up.

Typical teenage boy with a messy room but it's just the house that's messy.

Why is K still on a saline drip at home? How long has it been since he got shot?

"But Daddy I love him!!" Honestly though, P makes K such a better person overall. Not just for their employees, but for himself. K doesn't necessarily need to be cruel to be an effective leader. I still hold that K was the worst thing to happen to P though, it turned him into someone that the old P would have hated.

Back to the single seat on the Panigale.

Vegas is more like a dad to Macau than Gun is.

Chay is all embarrassed about his room, like no my crush cannot go in there because he'll see my little shrine.

I love how easy going Kim seems to be around Chay. Compared to how we know he can be. Jeff did such a good job with him.

And then the closeup where we see the friendly demeanor drop and he goes straight back into nosy mode and walls go back up.

And then when Chay comes back, those walls come down a bit again and Kim's like damn, this boy is getting to me. I must get him to admit his crush.

It's because he's jealous, P. Always because he's jealous. K is so bad at communication and trusting P 🥴 get your shit together.

That shit eating smirk on Vegas's face. So good at sowing little seeds of distrust.

My boy Tay coming in with the best advice. And the best style.

How long has that body been there though?

Pete's out here doing the most.

I actually love that K comes to see P and gives him the lucky gun to hold onto. Nice symbolism.

"Let me show you your product." Guns ablaze. God this scene is well done. Porsche and Vegas work together surprisingly well for gun fights.

I think I've played too much Assassin's Creed, I always want to hear requiescat in pace vs reposa in pace.

The party is so well lit. All these lighting differences are so pretty.

Then Vegas trying to get Porsche to stay on with him, telling him what he thinks P wants to hear bc he's a stalker ass.

Porsche is visibly uncomfortable around Vegas in the bathroom scene. Then during the kiss pushes him away... Because he only loves Kinn.

Then Porsche hits Kinn where it hurts: I know about your ex, but only vaguely.

So hurtful, that slap was well deserved.

"I shouldn't have loved a shitty guy like you." He was trying to hit K where it hurt. And finally speaking the words that K needed to hear.

I do like how P takes back control during the NC scene. Doing sexy time on his own terms this time.

The chemistry is out of fucking control.

Consistently, the best NC scene of the series in this episode, in my humble opinion. Plus growing (my faves) KimChay's relationship :')

Episode 8 next!

[balshumetsbaragouin]

Passion and Plasmatic Plague: Chapter Five

Chapter Five is out! Valerie gets a new suit upgrade from our least favorite halfa. Second to last chapter in the First Act already? Wow! This is another double feature day, so prepare for a Bittersweet chapter, too.

You can read chapter five here!

Still not convinced? You can get a sneak peek below:

The window on the second floor creaked open, frigid early morning air leaking into the girl’s bathroom with a flourish of tiny snowflakes. They landed on the faded linoleum, already melting in the warmer temperatures. Valerie slipped inside, sliding the window shut with a click, and tiptoeing around the droplets of water near the window’s edge. She peered out of the door into the hall, taking in the darkened array of lockers and posters lining the walls, before recalling the rest of her suit. So far, so good. She didn’t make a habit of sneaking into school on the weekends. There wasn’t much interesting to be found there, and trespassing would earn her detention or worse.

However, this week, she’d picked up something interesting milling about school as one of the invisible social rejects haunting its halls. Kim and her little group of cronies weren’t the only ones whispering about the Ceris shrine. She strolled down the hall, bold now that she knew it was vacant, and thought through the rumors she’d overheard. Most of the information was consistent. You placed an offering on the altar, made a wish, and got what you wished for...usually. Sometimes your offering wasn’t big enough for your wish, so you had to come back with a bigger gift, but no one had visited more than twice to get the same request answered. 

She strode down the stairs, sticking to the slanting shadows formed by the early morning light, heading towards the back of the school. The floor’s usual dull appearance, marred by mud, dust, and now, more often, snow melt, had been buffed away by the attentive care of the school’s janitorial staff. She looked down, catching her nervous reflection in the shiny floors, and took a turn down a rarely used hall. If the rumors were true, and they’d all been consistent on this detail, the shrine would be in an unused room near the A/V club’s hangout space. She rounded another corner, eyes traveling along the wall to pick out the room numbers. 115, 117, 119, 121...there! 123. She thought, wariness now tingling up her spine as she approached the fabled shrine. The door opened on well oiled hinges, silent in the oppressive quiet of the empty school. 

On the other side sat a pile of colored cardboard, glitter, streamers, candles, and wood. The entire thing looked like someone’s overzealous art project, with too many sparkles and carefully cut out hearts adorning the wall behind the wooden altar. Behind the altar, but before the sparkle and heart decorated wall, sat a three-piece poster with stanzas written in red ink in each one and True Love Demands Sacrifice across the top. 

[agentemo]

Netflix's ATLA initial thoughts, ep 6: Masks

Ohhh this is the Blue Spirit episode! Alright alright alright alright alright alright al

Ohhh this is the war council episode. Not alright! Not alright!!!

ZUKO'S SMILE 😭

Leutenant Jee is right and he should say it. Lmao he got nervous at the end of that outburst though.

June is soooo hot. I love women.

I'm not sure how I feel about Roku's characterization after Bumi's character assassination. I do like how it establishes that the Avatars are all their own people. I'm a little confused about how talking to the other Avatars works, though. They can only embody him at their shrines; that makes sense. But can he only contact with them there?

Once again, I like the combination of storylines. There aren't a lot of little villages, for better or for worse, so taking these characters and combining them in an interesting way to storylines that I would never have thought of is fun and intriguing. They failed in ep5 but it is an ambitious thing to do and they've been mostly successful in the others.

"You couldn't have always been this way" BAD DIALOGUE! LEADING THE WITNESS! INTO A FLASHBACK.

Wait, are Katara and Sokka's bodies just alone in a forest with Appa and Momo? 😤

I love seeing Zhao's arrogance shine through. Until now, he was biding his time and using his resources well. But he got cocky once he thought he'd won. And it's totally believable.

Loving the Blue Spirit stuff. No notes. Just a good time... Wait why isn't anyone firebending? Anyway, the scenes in the stronghold were almost shot for shot from the OG and I don't WANT that from the live action show but they did a good job with it here. And the follow-up conversation between Aang and Zuko was awesome. This is what I wanted: appreciating the text while elevating. Bravo.

New drinking game unlocked: Take a shot whenever a child quotes an old or dead person.

I honestly like the change of Zuko fighting back. It makes sense. The scene was not easier to take. The follow-up was tough to see as well.

Daniel Dae Kim is too hot to be this evil. Ugh...burn me daddy.

NOW WHAT, JEE? NOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU THINK?! HE SAVED YOUR DUMBASS!

GOD AND ZUKO HASN'T SEEN THIS REVERENCE IN SO LONG. AND HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHY HE'S GETTING IT BUT HE DESERVES IT. CRYING ON MY COUCH.

Another great episode. So far, here are my thoughts. 1-3 were OK. 4 and 6 were great and 5 was trapped between two great episodes, making it really not.

THE FINAL TWO NEXT!

[talkingbl]

which characters from my completed bls are the greenest of flags?

Ultimate Green Flags: Green means GO!

Tian (1000Stars) - an angel

Kao (KMA/DBK) - a good boy that stays caught up in bad situations. the Ashanti to Pete's Ja Rule

Xi Gu (MODC) -

Sean (Not Me) - he's just out here trying to survive

White (Not Me) - we love a supportive twin 😤

Kim (Unforgotten Night) - just trying to get his life right honestly

Pharm (UWMA) - worst thing he ever did was learn his soul mate's name. It's like I can still hear him calling for him to this day... "p'dean! p'dean!!! p'deeeeeaaaaaan~"

Yellow Flags: Not bad but do tread lightly...

Salawat (2gether) - I don't know man he might actually be a red flag now that I think about it...

Tine (2gether) - he pretended to be gay to get rid of his GAY MALE secret admirer. he might not be dangerous but he does lack brain cells

Pat (Bad Buddy) - for no reason at all, he healed from a gunshot wound in 1 episode. never trust a man who can't die

Pran (Bad Buddy) - friends with Wai

Siwon (Blueming) - when he's miserable, so is everyone else around him

Pi (FUTS) - unchecked anger issues

Daon (Blueming) - when he lies through his teeth like it's nothing

Neua (SCOY) - is okay with his boyfriend collecting his trash and bodily fluids

Sangwoo (Semantic Error) - not too bad but maybe a little vindictive and inconsiderate

Khai (TOL) - the first 6 episodes never happened[.]

Third (TOL) - the way he iced Khai was telling TO ME

Dean (UWMA) - not green enough to be green, not red enough to be red

Phupha (1000Stars) - nah cause the way he just tossed Tian to the side like that and turned the whole village on my mans was slimey af

Haoting (MODC) - relentlessly bullied a guy, then fell in love with him a week later. if that's not the hallmark of a well-adjusted human being, I don't know what is

Absolute RED Flags 🚩🚩🚩🚩

Pete (KMA/DBK) - this grown ass man bullied a teenager lmao

Mork (FUTS) - has no clue what boundaries are

Toh (SCOY) - he steals his crush's trash and makes shrines out of it

Jaeyoung (Semantic Error) - the lengths he went to just to piss Sangwoo off should tell you that this man is capable of some fucked up shit

Kamol - I feel like I don't need to explain why forcing a stranger to LIVE WITH YOU b/c he has a phat ass and looks like a cherub when he cries is red flag behavior

[mortimerlatrice]

Hi Ty so so much for the secret Santa gift!!

You're so welcome!!! I have a surprising number of thoughts about little mister crow vigilante Kim. It was so hard picking just one thing to work on...

I sort of imagine everything with Kim and Chay going similarly to canon, with Porsche being recruited as a new henchman for the Theerapanyakul villain empire.

Kim just has two secret identities instead of one and is horrified when he sees Chay's shrine because it has photos of both his popstar and his vigilante personas. Somehow this kid has figured put they're the same person.

It makes him all the more determined to find out what other secrets Chay and his brother may be keeping...

Anyway! I'm so glad you liked it!!! Sorry for the late reply, life has been a bit hectic 😅

[gloriousmonsters]

it's late but brief ep 12 kp updates

vegaspete storyline is. a lot so far. i do like it, even tho it feels extremely speedrun by being brought in so late. them bonding over the abusive dads thing was good, the unhinged bdsm is sexy, and somehow despite the torture and light sexual assault they have better consent than kp for their first sex scene plus vegas uses a condom, so. a confused thumbs up about that

vegas babe i think your hedgehogs die because you keep them in antique birdcages with a light scattering of sawdust and no toys or stimulation or places to curl up. i hate to tell you this because you are Very wet and sad about it but. this is probably on you

on the other hand i guess vegas losing pets because he just doesn't know how to care for things properly and going '????? why happen?? is it because i'm a bad person or everything hates me maybe???' is very on brand

'i was responsible for covering up your parents' death' says korn, surprising nobody. honestly i expect another twist where he's MORE responsible or something cause. rancid vibes, but we'll see

you know how i said kinn was still likeable/enjoyable...? unfortunately not anymore. the followup to the bar sex scene was way too suddenly 'cute and sweet fluff' for me to really like it, and then the fucking tawan storyline happens, and i hate everything about it because 'ex from the past comes back and is an arbitrary villain' is not my least fave romance trope but it's Right up there, and it's a whole thing of kinn. not looping porsche in on important information and then blaming him for not wanting to be locked up/being mad kinn doesn't trust him. and he has just not recovered from that, because they keep on being either cloyingly cute while nothing happens, or it's another 'porsche get the FUCK out of there' scene. there are 2 eps but i'm genuinely unsure if kinn can get himself out of my bad graces in them. guess we'll see

currently i'm like. vegas has 2 hands. yes he lightly sexually assaulted porsche and nearly shot him and lied to him but. kinn has also done all those things and he's more insufferable, plus even if it's fake or w/e vegas and porsche had cute chemistry. plus if he and porsche and pete had a thing their abbreviation could be pvp

kim and chay are INSANE. they have so little time but every moment is fantastic. kim finds out chay has a shrine to him and is like 'hot. write me a love song, kid'. he then tries to ghost him and chay lightly stalks him in order to find him and perform his love song on the sidewalk. they sort-of kiss and cuddle together overnight and chay's like 'i love you! do you love me' and kim makes dial-up noises for five minutes while looking for emotions that he stopped having at the age of seven, and finally settles for, 'i'm hungry'. chay confronts him about lying and is wailing sobbing emoting his little heart out and kim is just like ._. then chay decides to cope by bailing on music college, styling himself to look more like kim, and trying to get into substance abuse (this FAMILY!!) whereupon kim remembers the emotion of anger and shows up just to punch a guy, yell at chay ambiguously, and leave. obsessed with them. no idea where this is going

[the-cookie-of-doom]

okay @fawndlyvenus @shubaka this is for you lol

Chay learns, very quickly, that there are a lot of things he and Porsche no longer know about each other.

For example: Porsche had no idea that his own boyfriend's youngest brother is the same guy that's existed within a shrine on Chay's wall for, oh, five years? And when he found out about Kinn's AWOL brother, Porsche had a name, but was never able to put a face to it, because Kim was too busy stalking Chay, and giving him guitar lessons - which Porsche never found out about, either - and taking him on dates, and then ripping his heart out of his chest. Chay decides not to tell Porsche about that last part, because by the time he can, he and Kim have already made up and gotten back together, and it would make things very awkward with Porsche. Who already disapproves of Kim on principle.

So, there are still things Chay and Porsche don't know about each other. And there are more things they wish they didn't know about each other.

Still, somewhere during Porsche's apologetic, secret-sharing mood, he revealed some things about his early days as Kinn's bodyguard. Namely his interactions with the Minor Family. Chay has gotten some of the details from Macau as well; how the first time they met, Porsche shoved him into the koi pond and broke his face on a statue. (Porsche fiercely insists that's not the real story).

Between the two of them, Chay is able to piece together a story.

Kan demanded that Vegas keep an eye on Porsche. Vegas enlisted Macau's help to reel him in with a false apology, and bribe him with the cherry red Ducati he's always wanted. Chay also learns Vegas kept a much... closer... involvement with Porsche than strictly necessary. And this part of the story always makes his stomach turn, the way Vegas would push and push and push, trying to take what wasn't his, and Porsche never quite looks at him when he talks about it. Chay doesn't look at him, either.

Porsche insists that he and Vegas are cool now. Pete insists Vegas has changed, and Porsche tells him that as far as he can tell, it's true. Vegas no longer acts like the monster his father forced him to be, now that his father is dead.

Still, he tells Chay these stories, because there's a part of him that still believes Vegas is dangerous, and Porsche needs him to know. To understand. To be safe.

Macau, to his credit, doesn't take offense to the way Chay always flinches when Vegas is mentioned. They never hang out at Macau and Vegas' new house - they're not unwelcome at the minor family house, but they stay away, there's too many memories - and bringing Macau to the main compound always make him a little nervous - Khun loathes Macau just as much as he adores Chay - but they figure it out. Pour over google Maps for an hour trying to establish an acceptable No Man's Land where they can meet in peace, without painful memories bleeding out between them.

Mostly that takes place at an internet cafe roughly in the middle of them, where they can game and bicker and act like normal kids for a while. In another year Macau will join him in university, and it'll be even easier to negotiate their interactions. For now, Chay will continue to feel like he's sneaking behind enemy lines the handful of times he picks Macau up directly from his house.

-

"He really has changed," Macau says one day. They're in the compound this time, at Khun's koi pond, and Maucau keeps looking around like he's waiting to be shoved into it. They're the only ones in the garden. Neither of them comment on Tankhun standing in his window, watching them fiercely.

Chay tosses a torn off piece of bread into the pond and says, "Mhm," and pretends he doesn't know who Macau is talking about. But Macau is kind of an asshole, and won't let him.

"He feels bad."

"I don't know why, it's not like he kidnapped me." He technically didn't. Chay knows that. He still doesn't like him.

"He keeps making sad faces at me and asking if you hate him."

Chay laughs at that. The next piece of bread is thrown at Macau. "Liar."

"Yeah, I am," Macau laughs. "He really does feel bad, though. He's got a thing about fucking with little brothers, y'know?" He tears into his own loaf of bread. It mostly crumbles into the grass as he picks at it. "Vegas really didn't mean for you to get caught up in everything. Tawan went behind his back."

"Yep. It's cool. Really." It's really not.

Macau sighs.

He stops trying to convince Chay, though. Maybe it's because he looks up at Tankhun's window, sees the unfiltered loathing pouring through it, and shudders, and yeah. He understands. And Tankhun never ever really did anything to him, not like Tawan - and Vegas - did to Chay.

"You know, that was the worst day of my life," Chay says casually. "Well, second worst. Actual worst was way worse, emotionally at least, but that day started as the best day of my life-"

"Because of Kim?"

Chay nods, a blush dusting his cheeks. They've finally managed to get their shit back together, so they can get back together, but it's only been a few weeks. It's still new and kind of scaring, and sometimes Chay still thinks he's going to wake up and find it was all a dream. He's working on it.

Macau scrunches up his nose and says, "This family is so weird. You don't have any other brothers, right? Because I think I'd be genetically obligated to try and smash, and I don't really want to."

"Dude! You're actually insane."

"Dude, come on - think about! Your brother is banging Kinn, Vegas tried to bang him, and you're doing your thing with Kim-"

"No one's tried with Tankhun, right?"

"Yeah, but that's cause he's weird. So that just leaves me, right? The last eligible Theerapanyakul bachelor." They both break into laughter so deep it hurts, and Macau throws himself into Chay's side, batting his lashes. "But hey, if you and Kim don't work out..."

"I hate you," Chay says, and Macau's worst fear finally comes true as Chay shoves him into the koi pond, and a pair of guards come running when they hear screams.

By the time they get there Macau has pulled Chay into the water, and the two are playfully trying to drown each other, and the guards look at each other, unsure if they should get involved.

In the end, they're called off - by Tankhun, who secretly hopes Chay succeeds in drowning Macau, eagerly watching from his window - and the boys eventually drag themselves out, waterlogged and sore from laughter.

No one could tell they're crying beneath it all, months of pent-up emotions finally released. They cling to each other as they catch their breath, and maybe it's a little desperate, grasping hands that hurt, but it's okay, because even if their ribs are aching and their lungs are burning, and nothing is certain, they're okay.

[minhosbitterriver]

⨳ ❛𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓

❛ In which two disabled idols find comfort in each other’s arms.

𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐣𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐠 + female reader ೯ ( 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 ) ~7.2k

꒰ 💌 ꒱ ミ There’s no schedule for my updates, but I mostly write when my fibromyalgia is kicking my ass. I hope you guys enjoy, Reblogs and feedback are much appreciated! ── ( 𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲 )

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Han deals with a lot of anxiety and depression, reader has fibromyalgia, constant mentions of being in pain, love-making, cussing, lots of angst, MDNI.

( 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 ) ( 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 & 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 ) ( 𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬 ) ( 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 )

𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬: on going

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🦇 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐝: 00 • 00 • 2024 🦇

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