#MY FIC WITH ME AND MY WIFE I MEAN. MY SWEET BELOVED WIFE WHO I ADORE SO MUCH

[cafecouple]

OHHH MY GOODNESS... OH MY WORD... OHHHHH MY HEAVENS EVEN. OHHHHH MY.

[muiitoloko]

I'm EATING all of the Severus' fanfics and I haven’t seen one about daddy Severus, where his private, not secret, love (also a teacher from Hogwarts) is pregnant and he's so fluffy and protective about his new little family. Thank you for your work on all these stories *kisses to your brain* 🩷🩷🩷🩷

(Also if yall have father-to-be Severus fanfics recs please share, I beg)

Title: Daddy Snape's Dilemma.

Summary: The feared Potions Master reveals a softer side as he prepares for the arrival of his child, though his strict nature remains. Balancing love and discipline, Severus discovers that fatherhood is as complex as any potion.

Pairing: Severus Snape × Fem! Reader

Warnings: None.

Author's Notes: I love your enthusiasm for Severus fics—who can resist the allure of a fluffy, protective Daddy Severus, right? 🩷🩷🩷 Your idea is so sweet; I might have to dive into that territory myself! As for father-to-be Severus fanfics, I have to admit, I don't usually read them, so I'm not too familiar with what's out there. It's quite rare for me to venture into Snape fanfics. But hey, maybe @smilingformoney has some hidden gems or knows where to find them! *kisses to your brain back* 😄

First, Second and Third part here.

Also read on Ao3

You sighed with relief as you settled behind your desk after finishing the last lesson of the day with the second-year students. The Ancient Runes classroom was quiet now, a stark contrast to the lively atmosphere of a few moments ago. You allowed yourself a moment to caress your growing belly, smiling softly as you felt the gentle flutter of movement within. At five months pregnant, your belly was getting bigger with each passing day, and though you loved the feeling of your child growing inside you, you couldn't deny that it was also becoming more tiring. Your magic had become unpredictable, surging with emotion and exhaustion, which made your job as a professor a bit more challenging than usual.

Despite all this, you stubbornly refused to take things easy, as your beloved husband, Severus Snape, had repeatedly suggested—no, insisted upon. But "suggested" was putting it mildly. Severus could be a pain in the ass when he wanted to be, and now that he knew he was going to be a father, his overprotectiveness had reached new levels.

You chuckled to yourself, remembering how he had practically growled at poor Professor Flitwick earlier that day when the tiny Charms professor had approached you, his usual cheerful demeanor evident as he asked if he could feel the baby kick. Severus had swooped in like a bat out of hell, his dark robes billowing behind him as he inserted himself between you and Flitwick.

“Absolutely not, Flitwick,” Severus had snapped, his tone icy. “My wife is not a spectacle for your amusement.”

Flitwick, who was well accustomed to Severus’ gruff manner, had only chuckled in response, backing away with his hands raised in mock surrender. “My apologies, Severus, I didn’t mean any offense. Just a bit of fatherly curiosity.”

Severus had glowered at him, his dark eyes narrowing to dangerous slits. “Fatherly or not, I’ll thank you to keep your distance.” He had then turned to you, his expression softening just enough to show his concern, but not enough to lose his characteristic sternness. “You should be resting,” he had admonished, his voice lowering to a tone that was meant only for your ears. “These students and staff can manage without you for a while.”

“I’m fine, Severus,” you had replied, smiling at him despite his overbearing attitude. “Besides, I’m pregnant, not an invalid.”

He had given you one of his signature looks—a mix of exasperation and something deeper, something softer, that he would never admit to in front of others. “You’re far too stubborn for your own good,” he had muttered before storming off, his robes swirling dramatically around him.

You shook your head fondly at the memory, amused by how protective Severus had become. It wasn’t just the staff he was wary of, but the students as well. You had heard from several sources that he had taken to patrolling the hallways near your classroom during your lessons, his presence enough to intimidate even the bravest of Gryffindors into behaving. There were rumors among the students that he had placed extra wards around your classroom, though you had yet to confirm them.

The door to your office creaked open, pulling you from your thoughts. You looked up to see Minerva McGonagall stepping inside, her stern expression softening into a smile when she saw you. “Good evening, dear,” she greeted warmly. “I just wanted to check in on you before I head to dinner.”

“Good evening, Minerva,” you replied, returning her smile. “I’m managing well, thank you. And how are you?”

Minerva’s eyes twinkled with amusement. “Oh, the usual chaos,” she said with a fond sigh. “The Gryffindors are keeping me on my toes, as always. And I hear Severus is keeping you well-protected?”

You couldn’t help but laugh at that. “That’s one way to put it. He’s being Daddy Snape in full force.”

Minerva raised an eyebrow at the nickname, a small smile playing at the corners of her lips. “Daddy Snape, you say? I dare say he’s earned that title.”

You nodded, feeling a surge of affection for your husband, even if his overprotectiveness could be a bit much at times. “He certainly has,” you said softly, your hand resting on your belly. “He growled at Flitwick today for simply asking to feel the baby kick.”

Minerva chuckled at that, shaking her head. “Poor Filius. I can only imagine Severus’ reaction. But don’t worry, my dear. Severus means well, even if he’s a bit… overzealous in his protectiveness.”

“Yes, I know,” you agreed. “And I wouldn’t have it any other way. Though sometimes I think he’s more afraid of you than anyone else. You’re the only one he allows to touch my belly without glaring daggers.”

Minerva’s eyes twinkled with amusement as she stepped closer, her hand hovering just above your belly. “May I?”

“Of course,” you said with a smile, moving Minerva’s hand to the side where you felt a small kick. “Right there.”

Minerva’s eyes softened as she felt the gentle movement, a warm smile spreading across her face. “He’s going to be a wonderful father,” she said quietly, her gaze meeting yours.

“Yes, he is,” you whispered, feeling a lump form in your throat as you thought about the future. “He’s already so devoted, even if he drives me mad sometimes."

Minerva patted your hand reassuringly before stepping back. “Well, I’ll leave you to it, my dear. But if Severus gives you too much trouble, just let me know. I’ll have a word with him.”

You laughed softly at that. “I’ll keep that in mind, Minerva. Thank you.”

As Minerva left your office, you leaned back in your chair, feeling the baby move again beneath your hand. You couldn’t help but smile, thinking of Severus and his fierce protectiveness. He might be a pain in the ass, but he was your pain in the ass, and you wouldn’t trade him for anything.

You were just beginning to relax when the door to your office swung open with a loud bang, and Severus Snape stormed in, his expression a mixture of irritation and concern.

“What did I say about resting?” he demanded, his voice sharp as he approached your desk.

You raised an eyebrow at him, refusing to be intimidated by his tone. “I was resting, Severus. I was just sitting here, minding my own business.”

He huffed, clearly not satisfied with your answer. “You need to be more careful. You’re overexerting yourself, and it’s affecting your magic. I’ve noticed the fluctuations.”

You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at your lips. “Severus, I’m fine. The baby’s fine. You’re just being overprotective.”

“I have every right to be,” he shot back, crossing his arms over his chest as he loomed over you. “There are too many dangers, especially with that lunatic Black on the loose.”

You sighed, knowing that Severus’ worries were not unfounded. The news of Sirius Black’s escape from Azkaban had shaken the entire wizarding world, and you knew it weighed heavily on Severus, given their complicated history.

“I know you’re worried, Severus,” you said gently, reaching out to take his hand. “But I’m safe here. And I have you watching over me.”

His expression softened slightly as he looked down at you, his dark eyes filled with a mixture of concern and affection. “I just want to keep you and our child safe,” he murmured, his thumb brushing over the back of your hand.

“And you are,” you reassured him, squeezing his hand gently. “But you don’t need to do it alone. We have Minerva, and the other staff, and even Dumbledore. We’re surrounded by people who care about us.”

Severus sighed, his shoulders relaxing slightly as he seemed to accept your words. “I suppose you’re right,” he muttered, though there was still a hint of reluctance in his tone.

“Of course I’m right,” you teased, smiling up at him. “Now, how about you help me back to our quarters so I can actually get some rest? I think Daddy Snape could use a break too.”

He gave you a look that was half-amused, half-exasperated, but the corner of his mouth quirked up in a small smile. “Very well,” he said, his tone begrudging. “But don’t think for a moment that I’m going to stop being overprotective. It’s in my nature.”

“And I wouldn’t have it any other way,” you replied, standing up and allowing him to wrap his arm around your waist, guiding you out of the office.

As you walked together through the dimly lit corridors of Hogwarts, you couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of contentment. Despite his gruff exterior and overbearing nature, Severus was a man who loved deeply, and you were lucky enough to be the recipient of that love. Even if it meant enduring his overprotectiveness, you knew it came from a place of genuine care and devotion.

And as you leaned into his side, feeling the warmth of his presence, you knew that whatever challenges lay ahead, you would face them together—with Severus by your side, and your growing family at the heart of it all.

Later that evening, you found yourself in the cozy warmth of your quarters, the comforting crackle of the fire in the hearth filling the room with a soft glow. The scent of your simple dinner—a warm stew, bread, and some pumpkin juice—wafted through the air. Severus sat across from you at the small dining table, his dark eyes focused intently on the book he held in one hand. The other hand was absentmindedly stirring his stew with his spoon, though it was clear that his mind was far from the meal in front of him.

You watched him with a fond smile, amused by how deeply engrossed he was in his reading. The book’s title, The Art of Parenting: A Wizard’s Guide, was clearly visible, and you stifled a laugh at the intensity with which Severus was absorbing every word. He looked every bit the severe Potions Master as he read, his brow furrowed in concentration, but the subject matter was decidedly different from his usual fare.

"Did you know," he began suddenly, not looking up from the book, "that at five months, our child is approximately the size of a grapefruit? A grapefruit," he repeated, as though the concept was particularly profound. "And according to this, the baby’s bones are starting to harden now. Quite the development."

You bit your lip to keep from laughing out loud. The way Severus delivered this information—with all the seriousness of a professor lecturing on the properties of a rare potion—was both endearing and hilarious. He was so intent on getting everything right, so determined to master the art of fatherhood just as he had mastered potions and the Dark Arts.

He finally looked up from the book, his expression serious. “It also says here that you should be consuming more calcium. It’s essential for the baby’s bone development. I’ve already spoken to the house-elves; they’ll be bringing you more dairy from now on.”

“Severus,” you began, your tone light, “I appreciate your concern, really, but I think you’re worrying a bit too much. I’ve been eating just fine.”

He ignored your reassurances, setting the book down on the table with a decisive thud. “Worrying too much?” he repeated, his tone incredulous. “This is our child we’re talking about. I’ll not have anything less than the utmost care taken, especially given the circumstances.”

You raised an eyebrow at him, knowing full well what he meant by “the circumstances.” The looming threat of Sirius Black was never far from his mind, and it only fueled his already fierce protectiveness. “Severus, everything is going to be fine,” you said gently, trying to soothe his frayed nerves. “We’re safe here. And as for the baby, I promise I’m taking care of myself.”

But Severus was not easily placated. “You may be taking care of yourself, but I’ll not have you neglecting anything that could potentially aid in our child’s development.” He leaned forward slightly, his intense gaze locking onto yours. “Did you know,” he continued in that same lecturing tone, “that the baby can now hear sounds from outside the womb? My voice, your voice… even the drivel those dunderheads of Gryffindors spout during class.”

At this, you couldn’t help it—you burst into laughter. The image of your unborn child listening to the Hogwarts students’ chatter was too much to handle. “Severus,” you said, your voice tinged with amusement, “you’re treating this like one of your potion experiments. I half expect you to start measuring out ingredients for a perfect pregnancy potion.”

Severus’s eyes narrowed, though you could see the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “You may laugh,” he said darkly, “but this is serious business. Do you think this book exists merely to amuse witches and wizards with idle facts? It’s a manual for the correct upbringing of our offspring.”

“I know it’s serious,” you replied, still smiling. “And I’m glad you’re so invested. But you don’t have to treat it like a potion with exact measurements and timed stirring.”

He sighed, a long-suffering sound, as though he was dealing with a particularly obstinate student. “I simply want to be prepared,” he muttered, glancing down at your belly, his expression softening ever so slightly. “I want to give our child the best start in life. Is that so unreasonable?”

Your heart melted at his words, and you reached across the table to take his hand in yours. “It’s not unreasonable at all,” you said softly. “In fact, I think it’s one of the things I love most about you. But remember, Severus, parenting isn’t something you can learn entirely from a book. We’ll figure it out together, one day at a time.”

He held your gaze for a moment, then nodded, his usual stoicism returning. “Perhaps you’re right,” he conceded. “But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be as informed as possible.” He picked up the book again, flipping through the pages until he found the one he was looking for. “And according to this,” he said, his voice taking on that lecturing tone once more, “we should also be preparing the nursery soon. The baby will need a proper environment—calm, quiet, and free from distractions.”

You stifled another laugh, knowing full well that Severus’s idea of a proper environment would likely resemble his own quarters—dark, orderly, and intimidatingly silent. “Calm and quiet,” you echoed. “That sounds about right. But I’m not sure our child will appreciate the dungeon aesthetic as much as you do.”

Severus shot you a look, but there was no real heat behind it. “I’ll have you know, dungeons are perfectly suitable for raising a child. They’re secure, temperature-controlled, and free from unnecessary frivolities.”

You couldn’t help but grin. “I’ll keep that in mind when we start decorating. Maybe we can paint the walls a nice shade of midnight black?”

He looked at you for a long moment, and then, to your surprise, he let out a low chuckle. It was a rare sound, and it warmed your heart to hear it. “You’re incorrigible,” he murmured, shaking his head slightly. “But perhaps… a bit of color wouldn’t be entirely out of the question.”

Your grin widened. “See? We’re already compromising. We’re going to be great parents, Sev.”

He looked at you, his expression softening in that way it only did when it was just the two of you. “Yes,” he said quietly, his hand tightening around yours. “I believe we will.”

And as you sat there together, you couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of contentment. The future might be uncertain, and the challenges ahead might be daunting, but with Severus by your side, you knew you could face anything. Even if it meant enduring countless lectures on parenting techniques and the optimal conditions for nursery decor. After all, that was just part of the adventure.

After dinner, Severus insisted on helping you undress and prepare for bed. His hands, usually so precise and controlled in the brewing of potions, were surprisingly gentle as he unbuttoned your robes. The dim light from the fire flickered across his face, casting shadows that deepened the stern lines of his features, but you could see the care in his eyes, even as he kept his expression carefully neutral.

"Severus, you don’t have to do this every night," you teased softly, watching as he folded your robes with meticulous care, his long fingers smoothing out any wrinkles.

He glanced at you, his dark eyes narrowing slightly. "I’m perfectly aware that you are capable of undressing yourself," he replied, his voice its usual low, measured tone. "But considering your current condition, I prefer to ensure that you’re not overexerting yourself."

You smiled, touched by his concern, even if it came wrapped in his typical bluntness. "I appreciate it, truly. But you do realize that pregnancy doesn’t turn me into a delicate flower, right?"

He didn’t respond immediately, instead focusing on helping you into the bath he had prepared. The warm water enveloped you, the scent of lavender filling the air, and you sighed contentedly as you leaned back against the tub’s edge. Severus knelt beside you, his stern face softening slightly as he watched you relax.

"Perhaps not," he said quietly after a moment, his deep voice almost a murmur. "But it does make you and our child more vulnerable. I won’t take any chances."

You reached out to touch his hand, appreciating the rare moment of vulnerability in his words. He allowed the contact, his fingers curling slightly around yours, though his expression remained stoic.

"Thank you, Severus," you whispered, feeling a swell of affection for the man who, despite his gruff exterior, cared so deeply for you and your unborn child.

Later, when you were settled into bed, Severus surprised you by bending down to your belly. His tall, lean figure cast a long shadow over the bed, and you raised an eyebrow, curious about what he was doing. He hesitated for a moment, as if unsure of how to proceed, before finally speaking.

"Now, listen here," he began, his voice taking on that stern, lecturing tone he often used with his students, "I expect you not to pay any attention to the nonsense that the Gryffindors will undoubtedly try to fill your head with. Your father is here to ensure that you grow up with a proper understanding of what it means to be a powerful wizard or witch, a true Slytherin."

You bit your lip to keep from laughing, your amusement growing as Severus continued his one-sided conversation with your unborn child.

"You will excel in Potions, of course," he went on, his tone brooking no argument, "and in the Dark Arts as well. I will personally see to it that you are well-versed in the most advanced magical disciplines. No child of mine will be anything less than exceptional."

He paused, as if considering something deeply troubling, and you couldn’t resist asking, "And what if our child is sorted into Gryffindor?"

Severus straightened up immediately, his expression darkening as he fixed you with a glare. "That," he said, his voice cold and firm, "will not happen."

You couldn’t help it—you burst out laughing at the sheer indignation in his voice. "You can’t control the Sorting Hat, Severus. What if it does happen? Can you imagine? A Gryffindor in our family? The horror!"

His eyes narrowed dangerously, but you could see the flicker of something else—perhaps a bit of horror, mixed with a grudging amusement—beneath the surface. "I’ll have a word with the Sorting Hat, if necessary," he muttered darkly. "There will be no Gryffindors under my roof."

"Really, Severus? You’d try to influence the Sorting Hat? I never knew you were so biased!" you teased, still laughing.

Severus crossed his arms over his chest, looking every bit the brooding Potions Master you had fallen in love with. "It’s not bias," he retorted, his tone icy, "it’s practicality. A Gryffindor child would be… disruptive."

You smiled at him, loving how serious he was taking this hypothetical scenario. "And what would you do if, by some twist of fate, our child did end up in Gryffindor?"

He stared at you for a long moment, his expression unreadable. Finally, he sighed, a sound full of reluctant resignation. "I suppose," he said slowly, as though the words were being dragged out of him against his will, "I would have to… tolerate it."

You grinned widely, knowing how much it pained him to even consider the possibility. "Tolerate, hmm? That’s quite generous of you, Severus."

He scowled, clearly not amused by your teasing. "Don’t push your luck," he warned, though there was a faint twitch at the corner of his mouth that betrayed his amusement.

You reached out to him, pulling him down beside you on the bed. He allowed himself to be drawn into your embrace, his usually stiff posture relaxing slightly as you rested your head on his chest.

"Whatever house our child ends up in," you said softly, your voice filled with affection, "they’ll be loved, and they’ll have the best father in the world."

Severus didn’t respond immediately, but you could feel the way his hand tightened around yours, a silent acknowledgment of your words. When he finally spoke, his voice was quieter, more vulnerable than you were used to hearing.

"I’ll do my best," he murmured, his tone almost self-deprecating. "Though I make no promises about how I’ll handle a Gryffindor in the family."

You chuckled, pressing a kiss to his chest. "I’m sure you’ll manage, Severus. You’ve already proven you’re more than capable of handling the unexpected."

He huffed softly, the sound almost a laugh, before wrapping his arms around you more tightly. "Sleep now," he said, his voice returning to its usual firmness. "You need your rest."

You closed your eyes, feeling safe and content in his embrace. As you drifted off to sleep, you couldn’t help but imagine the future—the laughter, the challenges, the love—and you knew that, no matter what house your child ended up in, you and Severus would face it together.

Even if that meant surviving the potential heart attack Severus would have if his child ever donned the scarlet and gold of Gryffindor.

[reveluving]

SHY WIFE AND PRICE....ARE YOU FREAKIN KIDDING ME!!!!!Imagine this Adonis of a man spoiling her from the first date and even her being shy, the 141(plus Kate) KNOW who's the boss( he ALWAYS have a photo and a story about Mrs.Price and it's just the cutest thing how his eyes light up that they also love her)

CUUUUUUTE AAAAAA!! GNAWING ON MY BARS RN!! And thank you for specifying the Adonis of a man bit! Can't forget about that!! ☝🏼😌💗

Includes: tooth-rotting fluff!

COD x shy!wife thots closed! Thank you, everyone, for your time & amazing minds! I sincerely hope I can do this again with y'all soon! 💌

Come & check out my COD m.list!

In any case of our beloved shy!wife fics, especially with his line of work, just expect your husband to have a polaroid or five of you ready.

And John is no different.

You must be a special one if you managed to catch the eyes of the captain, and to clarify, you are!

John knew there was no going back to his mundane yet chaotic lifestyle the second he asked you out. It took everything in him not to chuckle at your look of disbelief, your lips parting just a tad bit. He didn’t want you to think he was making fun of you, you were genuinely adorable with your expressiveness. And though had told him you were open to anything, even specifying that you wouldn’t mind anything small and simple, he didn’t let you.

He took you out to dinner on your first date, nothing too fancy, though that couldn’t be said the same on the later dates, gifted you a small but beautiful bouquet and the rest was history. 

And amazingly, he gets even better at spoiling you after he puts a ring on your finger. As if he wasn't already good since your first date!

Kisses or cakes, hugs or huge bouquets, he'll always find a way to spoil you. Because you—your smiles, giggles and laughs, your time and your love for him means so much.

More than you can imagine.

A sweetheart, a gentleman. You couldn’t ask for a better man to fall for you, though, like him, you were mind-blown to even think a man, no, a hunk like him showed interest in you. Made you feel wanted, special—someone he wanted to be with with zero hesitation. 

He wouldn’t be able to forget your shy smile, how you’d mindlessly trail your fingers across the table or your lap out of embarrassment, how your fingers curled around his hand, despite averting your gaze from his cheeky smile many dates later.

And though the wedding was small, to him, it felt like a sweet fairytale.

To finally be able to call you Mrs Price.

Laswell had the privilege to meet you first before everyone else. She enjoys the sisterly moments you’d have, a breath of fresh air from the craziness, to say the least, that she has to witness in her lifetime. Always appreciates you checking in on her via messages or if she’s lucky, a quick call. And it becomes a tradition of hers to jokingly remind John to take care of you and not to drive you crazy.

And then, there were the boys.

Johnny was the one who asked about you, catching the man looking at one of the polaroids of you with nothing but love in his eyes. Longing to get it over with and come home to you. Johnny didn’t think he’d be willing to talk about you at all, let alone more than a few sentences, i.e. privacy reasons or he just prefers to be on his own. Take in the quiet moment before any hell breaks loose later on.

Understandable, so imagine not only his surprise but also the rest of the 141 when he talks about you. First, with pure endearment in his tone, then the story gets romantic, cheesier even, but all three of them listened to his stories like no other (read: a father telling his kids how he met their mother), even if they acted like they were just casually fixing their weapons or thinking to themselves.

C’mon, he knows them!

Like John, you treat the boys like your very own. If Johnny, Kyle or Simon wanted to be doted over—to be cared for, something they haven’t felt in a while even if some of them wouldn’t want to admit it, then you’d give them millions! Even something as little as a handwritten message or passing them a few words i.e. take care and good luck via John.

Visiting the Price’s house now feels like a family thing. Again, it’s cheesy, it’s corny, and maybe even childish to some, for a bunch of men to be looking forward to these visits like a child being away from their parents at a dorm during college, none of you cared. Not you. Not John. And most importantly, not his boys.

None of them could have imagined your words to stick in their minds in dire times. A little motivation to return safely. Back to the base, for John, and back the Price’s home, for you.

“Johnny, I’m out of a few things in the kitchen. Could you drop by the store and get these for me, please?” “Can do!”

“Simon, have you seen John’s car keys? I can’t find them anywhere.” “I can help look for it w’you.”

“Kyle, I told you I can handle the fireplace.” “S’not that hard. Don’t worry!”

Home.

Bonus: A lil’ story I’m still working on with the COD men + dogs includes John with an American Akita. Similar to Phillip and Kai, John’s gigantic pupper tends to prefer listening to you to him.

His intolerance for certain people or animals drops in an instant the second he sees you, turning into a baby (your baby, might John add) but he also knows when duty calls. Ears tilting back and growling at a stranger who doesn’t know, or worse; ignores that you're taken.

And in John’s words: good boy.

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

[endless-ineffabilities]

blue eyes so green (18+)

Ewan Mitchell x reader / Aemond Targaryen x reader

A oneshot where Ewan becomes cross with you for having a sensuous dream... about his character, Aemond.

a/n : yet another Ewan fic to ring in the season premiere! Expect a whole lot of Aemond fics while we're in the thick of the new season. Happy premiere day, my loves!

word count : 1k ▪︎ masterlist

The silver-haired Targaryen emerges from underneath your skirts, his deft fingers buried in the layers of cloth to keep them away from your prized cunny.

His curved lips are left puckered, parted and glistening from the sheen of your juices. He had practically lost his mind when you finally returned from your duties with the Septa, the hours far too long for him to be away from his lady-wife.

So, with only a few raspy words of desire -

You have kept me waiting

All day long I have longed for a taste of you, my wife.

I will make certain that you never wish to be parted from me again.

- he had lifted you atop the desk in his study, haphazardly shoving his heavy leather-bound volumes of histories and philosophies.

And in a haste, he delighted in a sweetness that can only ever be known to him. Just him, because you will only ever be his.

Your cunny is his. Your kisses all his own. Your heart, his possession.

And he is yours. All yours. He will never tire of making this known. "My love," his tone is desperate as he kisses you hungrily, the exquisite rarity of a prince begging, "I am yours to take for tonight, and every night, for as long as I am breathing."

"Oh, Aemond," you croon, tracing his features with your fingertips, "my sweet husband. Is that your fancy way of telling me that you wish to fuck me for eternity?"

He smiles against your skin. He has always loved the pert particularity of his wife's humour.

"Oh, my sweet sweet wife," his hands seek and they find the fastenings of your dress, the keys to his kingdom, "you know me so well."

And long into the night, you ride a dragon.

All throughout the morning, you can count on one hand the times your boyfriend actually spoke to you.

A few rushed, almost incoherent responses are all he seems capable of sharing.

And it is starting to bug you.

"Baby," you reach for Ewan's hand as the two of you peacefully have your Sunday breakfast.

He squeezes your hand in return, at least, but he doesn't fully meet your gaze.

You retract your hand, and for a split second, his hand scrambles to keep a hold of yours on instinct, but he lets it go with a sigh.

You try again, your tone now more demanding, "Alright, Ewan. Tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing's wro - "

"Look at me."

He takes his sweet time in doing so, his blue eyes raking from his plate to the expanse of the dining table, to your arms and finally your face. He takes another deep breath, unfazed by the attitude you're showing him.

"Some dream you had last night, huh, babe?"

"Excuse me?"

"Oh yeah," he tilts his head, with the solemn confidence of someone who thinks he has the upper hand, "you just about woke me up with all your squirming and moaning."

"Oh." It dawns on you just what he is hinting at. Normally you would only recall some odd bits from your dreams, and sometimes they would even be gone from your mind as soon as you wake. But not the one you just had - no.

That one was just too good to forget.

"Baby, come on," a giggle escapes your lips, feeling less heavy now that you know what he is so worked up about.

"It's not funny," he pouts, fighting back a laugh as he can't help but mirror his beloved's glee. He dramatically pushes his plate away, but the annoyance isn't there. "You basically cheated on me," he pretends to complain.

"Do you even know who I dreamt about?" You amble over to where he sits, and his eager arms take you onto his lap. So much for being infuriated at you.

He doesn't answer, shaking his head as he absently caresses your hips.

"You," you clarify, and his eyes shoot up to meet yours, "well... you meaning Aemond. I had a dream about the one-eyed prince."

He shrugs, "I know."

"You... you know?" You try to stand up but his sturdy arms keep you firmly in place. "You know who I was dreaming about, and yet you sulk all morning?"

"So what? I can't deny that I'm still jealous. Aemond would be a pretty fierce competitor for your heart, darling."

"But he's you!" you squeal, lightly punching his chest. He takes your forearm and pulls you closer to press a soft kiss against your cheek.

"I know," he smiles. "I suppose I was just getting way into my thoughts."

"You think?"

"Hmm," he narrows his eyes, his features taking on that cheeky guise he expertly sports so often, "if you were to choose, between myself and Aemond - "

"Oh no," you laugh dryly, prying yourself from his arms and returning to your seat, "I am not playing this game."

"Who do you think would be a superior lover in bed?"

"Ewan - "

"Come on, darling," he prods lightheartedly. "Humour me."

"Well," you say, "why don't you hurry up and finish your breakfast so you can convince me to your side?"

His cheeky sneer disappears at your insinuation, in its place an indicative clenching of his jaw.

A moment passes. You take a delightful sip of your orange juice, satisfied.

Sure enough, you hear his chair scrape loudly as he stands and makes his way to you.

"Fuck breakfast," he rasps. "Time to make your dreams come true, darling."

[sherlockig]

Hello my little grieving friends (aka my CREW!)

I just want to talk about how much our flag means death has given me. I have not had internet friends since i were a teenager. They all kind of disapeared over time in the same way as high school classmates went away. I have been on this blog on tumblr since 2010 and i have never experienced what ofmd has given me. Not even in my very derranged ca 5 year long sherlock-era did i get to befriend and know this many amazing people who live in my phone. Some of you have come and gone and that is life, but some of you are still here and I hope I get to keep you here for a very long time. Max can not stop us and I want to be here with you until tumblr is put down like the beloved rabid pet it is.

I think we are all taking the news very hard and I think it's important to remember what it is all about really. It's about love and family and above all else the crew so i just want to show some love for my beloved mutuals. And i hope maybe some of you will be inspired to do the same because its what we need in these dark times. We need to be a lighthouse guiding each other to shore.

First of all @gentlebeard - Ella💕 my beloved honey 🍯 I can not explain properly or even believe how lucky I am that I found you and that I get a little good morning from you every day. We have been talking every single day since the first message over a year ago and I don't remember or want to remember how i survived before that. I will treasure the time i spent drinking pina coladas on your balcony in the sun forever and i hope i will get some more time on that balcony this summer. I have found a pirate bar in Sweden so we can continue our expensive pirate drinks theme that we started in Berlin. There is no one else i want to spend 6-8 hours talking to over the phone.💕My partner in crime, lasagna partner and floor person or whatever nicknames we have come up with during this time. You are not just the perfect friend to have, you are also funny, sweet, smart and a expert at making fanvideos that make me cry my heart out and laugh my lungs up - sometimes at the same time 💕💕

@blakbonnet - Meow my darling💕 you were the first one i really started to talk to in the fandom and i am so glad i did. You brighten my days and i love talking to you you brilliant humanbeing (i often find myself thinking i have listened to much to cabin pressure because i struggle to use any other word than brilliant to explain things.. the Arthur runs deep in me) also thank you for being my personal skincare guide in life!! Your fics, your art, your edits, your gifs, your meta the whole you make my dash a better place and we are all happy to have you! There is nothing you are not good at and i am both a bit jealus and impressed by you. Its Meows fandom we all just live in it 💕💕

@youshouldseemeinadeerstalker - Nes my dear💕 We may not be talking very often but I know I always have you there. I loved our vacation together and we had so much to talk about that we didn't even realize that the same song kept playing in my car so long that it messed up my spotify wrapped. It was amazing taking naps with you outside ruins of castles and in botanical gardens and living together in the worlds smallest hotel room. I hope we can get lost together in more cities than Hamburg and Copenhagen. (preferably without rain and sickness and maybe with a map) 💕💕

@darkinerry - Marlena 💕 its a pleasure getting weather and work updates from you and i am always interested in knowing what you have been up to and what you have to say. It brightens my day, please never stop!! Your videos and gifsets can make any day better and you are always kind and funny which are two things i appreciate hugely in my friends!! 💕💕 + You have the coolest haircut out of all my mutuals 😌

@aha-my-villainous-thoughts - Ash my wife💕 my love💕Nothing can make me scream, blush and giggle as much as your fanart. You have this style of everything you make from fanart to dolls to interior design that is so special and breathtaking. One day we will drink so many lattes in a cosy cafe and then sniff lush products for the rest of the day. 💕 You are always there for me - as a online shoulder to cry on or to motivate me with the smuttiest wips ever. I am happy to be mutual married to you 💕💕

@bizarrelittlemew - Ida 💕- my thirsting for rhys brother in arms. I can not imagine tumblr without your gifs or your posts. I love screaming with you over a picture of rhys darbys bicep. I am so happy i got to meet you this summer and i really hope it will happen again. We are not that far from each other, just some miles and a stupid bridge; we can make it. You are always a sweetheart and an incredible friend who write the hottest fanfiction ever💕💕

@dickfuckk - josh 💕 (who I also thought for a long time was called tyler) I dont know where the fandom would be without your bts blog! its a international treasure and a service to humanity. i don't know how you do it. 💕You always have everything i have ever been looking for and as a bonus you are witty and funny like no one else. I am so happy i got to meet you and spend a whole day in your company! 💕

@izzy-b-hands - Holden my absolute darling!💕 I am so glad I got the chance to get to know you! You are smart, funny and kind and my izzy mutual tm. You are always there for me with kind words and I am still forever shipping izzy and the third badminton brother which I think is the best headcanon I have ever helped coming up with. 💕

@funforahermit - Kristina 💕 Your love for Rhys and your gifs are a staple on tumblr and my dash. I know where to go when i need someone to understand how hot Steve is (even if we have agreed that he is yours and Murray is mine which i still think is a fine deal). I very often make or see a picture of Rhys and my first thought is "I NEED TO SHOW KRISTINA THIS" so you live rentfree in my brain 💕

@rainbowcrowley - Addi 💕If i ever start playing wow again you bet i am gonna be talking your ear off about my little frost mages progress but in the meantime i am happy to have you on my dash and even if we don't talk that much are you a beloved part of my dash and brighten it daily.💕💕

@fandomsmeantheworldtome - Maria💕 You were one of the very first people i found in this fandom and your gifs might have helped my rhys obession taking form. You might be into many things I have never heard of but its a pleasure seeing your excitement over everything. You are always a ray of sunshine and i love that so much💕💕

@tabbystardust - Tabby dear💕 You are the kindest person I know who I always get the strongest need to hug and hold close. Your fanart is beyond this world and i adore it like nothing else. Its always both hot and soft in the best way ever💕 I am always excited to get kitty updates and to hear about your ramen receipts. I hope we can still meet at the con next year! I am game if you are!! 💕💕

@hummingbee-o0o - Humming 💕 (i dont know your name sorry) I am always excited to hear your thoughts and metas about everything ofmd related as well as your beautiful art. 💕 it was a pleasure to scream about season 2 after every watched episode!💕

@xoxoemynn - Emy 💕💕 i am so happy to be mutual with you! 💕You always bring joy to the people who get to be around you and fill my dash with the same. We might not talk often but i know you got my back! That is the kind of person you are!💕

@saltpepperbeard - Jodi💕 No one write tags on tumblr dot com like you. There is nothing that can cheer me up more than see that one of my posts has gotten a whole ass novel written in the tags and then i instinctively know that its you who have left your wonderful mark. You are always excited and such a lovely human to be mutual with. 💕 And on top of that you make incredible gifs that make my heart stop!!! 💕💕

@autumnbois - Kai 💕💕 I hope you are doing okay. We might not talk much right now but you were there for me when i needed it most and you are a good friend to have living in my phone.💕💕 I will think of you whenever i see something related to scream and your love for piccrew always make me smile💕

@edsbacktattoo - Jams, jams jams! 💕 We are never online at the same time because of the damn time differences *shakes fist* but you are a staple in this fandom. Your art is incredible and you are the sweetest cookie in the jar. You are funny and always spread good energy to everyone around you and I love that with my whole heart💕💕

@kiwistede - Sam 💕 Your love for stede and rhys is unmet and i love you for that. You are always a good source for some rhys darby insanity and we all know that is what i treausure most here in life! 💕💕

@stedesearring - Kaitlin💕 You are the sweetest and kindest soul out here always spreading joy and love like the sun of my dash. 💕 I always love seeing you and i am happy to have the pleasure to have you as a friend in my phone! 💕💕

@stedebonnets - Ara 💕 Where would we be without your gifs?? without your joy?? without your blog?? without you?? No one knows! I am so happy to call you a mutual and friend and you always bring a smile to my face. Always!!💕💕

@appleteeth - Liz 💕 No one is quite as normal about rhys darby as you and it a pleasure to watch! Speaking of pleasure.. your fic the slightest touch is an all time favorite of mine and i would be embarrassed to tell you how many times i have read it... you are one of my mutuals that i am baffled that they want to follow me. Its a privilege! 💕

@as-a-creww - Caroline dear 💕 You are a beloved mutual and your blog are a permanent part of my dash and i want to keep it like that! you are the friendliest of the friendliest and what is more important than that?? 💕💕

@nandorisms - Ed dear💕 Your shameless reblogs makes the world go around. You are always sweet and a much needed wwdits addition to my life. I count you as a dear friend living in my heart!💕

@londonlock - Londie! 💕💕 The only sherlock mutual i have left and i am very happy to have kept you! 💕 I might have left those days behind me but you know as well as i that sherlock lives in my soul and seeing some sherlock and john love on a daily basis keep me grounded and on top of that are you such a romantic and beautiful human being! 💕💕

@follovver - Tanya 💕 My fellow Swedish ofmd fan! I am very happy to have found you! its nice to be able do discuss it in my mother tongue and i hope we one day can do it live! its to bad we never met when we went to the same uni (or maybe we did but didn't know) Du är fantastisk!! 💕

@wastingyourgum - Al💕(which i always read in my head as artificial intelligence and giggle because it make me feel like you are a robot) My fellow rhys friend. You bring me doses of darby when its most needed and your blog is always on fleek 💕💕

@xray-vex - Xray 💕 100 % one of my funniest mutuals!💕💕 You make hilarious posts that no one else could even dream of coming up with! Always top tier blog content and what more can a girl ask for??💕

@jellybeanium124 - Nina💕 I can not imagine my blog without you! Your posts are always a delight and you are so nice and sweet and funny and incredible (even when you make math mistakes kisses kisses) You bring a honest joy into the fandom that we could not live without! 💕💕

@thunderwingdoomslayer - Nellie 💕 My official rhys darby gif provider who I come to as if i needed a new hit of an illegal substance. I salute you and thank you for your service!💕💕

@forestofsprites - Green my dear 💕You might have gone from ofmd to be the supernatural provider of my dash but that does not stop you from being the kindest forest spirit i know. Your presence is calming in a way i can not explain and i am glad to have you and your love for meg here.💕💕

@cheersmequeers - Kate💕💕 A big puzzle piece to bring my dash together. Always filling it with my favorite gay pirates and i love having you here. Always friendly and full of love.💕💕

@sugashook - Sugaaa💕💕 You know i am in love with your art! Your art is always on top and it bring me back to life every time. I keep the dress i bought from you on the outside of my closet so every morning its the first thing i see and it sets the day right!💕💕 I wear your art on my tshirt to the gym as often as i can hoping to lure in a ofmd fan between the weights but that has not happened yet sadly!! Never stop making your art!! The world would be at loss if that happened 💕💕

@lacefuneral - Jay 💕(should be called YAY because that is what i say when i see a new selfie or fashion post from you) You are a fantastic friend and i love your love for stede and you are always kind and patient in a way that makes me comfortable to ask you questions about something i might not be familiar with. You are forever my moth mutual in my mind 💕💕

@meanmisscharles - Charles 💕 In my head i call you charles but i don't think that is your name but i hope its okay with you! Always friendly and sweet but ready to fight the bullshit the other spread! and such a source for good music recommendations!! 💕💕

@forpiratereasons - Darcy 💕literary no one does it like Darcy! Aways bringing the best ofmd posts to my dash and ensuring i don't miss anything! You are incredible! 💕💕

@blackbeardskneebrace - Miles my dear 💕 You make incredible art both the cute and amazing ofmd art but also the gorgeous historical art you post. Its a pleasure to see you talk about history but also about our beloved gay pirates. Your snoopy ofmd art will live in my heart forever and i think it might be healing me a bit. Maybe even watering my crops and clearing my skin! And those valentine ofmd arts from last year. I am 100 % gonna bring them back this February like beloved decorations you store in the attic. 💕💕💕

@awkward-fallen-angel - Heather 💕 You are one of the sweetest people i have had the pleasure to come across. You bring a big excitement and attention to the things you like and it moves along to everyone near. I mean i have watched long critical role videos just because you spoke so warmly about them and i wanted to know what it meant. I love having you here. 💕💕

@mxmollusca - Mx 💕 (dont know your name so i am just calling you that) I mean you are an incredible writer. I have only managed to read ifwts once because i cried so much that i am scared to open it again because i might just never stop crying. You are creative and funny and absolutely totally normal about rhys darby which in my book is a very good thing to be. And besides that you are a very friendly and nice mutual who is always a pleasure to interact with. 💕💕

@poisonintopositivity - Lilias💕 We have not talked much but we have been mutuals for a very long time and i hope you know that i appreciate you greatly as a mutual and you always but the best posts on my dash!💕💕

@glam-hutchence - Birb 💕💕my dear bird lover! You are a sweet potatoe and i love reading about your love for music and the concerts you go to.💕 Its so nice to take a little part of your life. You are always there for me and i always get happy when i talk to you. You are like a little happy pill! 💕💕

@turtles-on-turts - Turts 💕 Whenever i see a turtle i think about you. Its your brand! You make amazing art! and the ones on canvas always blow me away. 💕💕 Its incredible. You are also so very pretty and i have that picture of you in your depression robe with all the pigeons imprinted in my mind because it such a cute one. You are always very friendly and i love reading your personal posts as well. 💕💕

@vonlipwig - Franky 💕 You bring me lots of normality about rhys darby but these days also a huge bunch of normality about david tennant which i appreciate a lot. You are very nice and i stand by my assesment that you have a very cool aura!💕💕

@haeva - Mar my beloved💕 You bring me my wifes emily and valkyrie and a bunch of amazing posts about everything i can imagine. You are loving and sweet and good at maths which i am always very impressed by. I love being your mutual and doing ask games with you is a pleasure!💕💕

@mykonossalome - Myko💕 When i see moomin i think of you because i know how much you love it. We dont talk as much as i would like but the interactions we have had has meant a lot to me and i love seeing you posting about the things you love! 💕💕

@cottoncandiescupcakes - Cupcake 💕 I love that you are always so excited over our boy the swede and its a pleasure to compare language with you. We can continue fighting if the swede belong to the dutch or the swedes but that is a pleasure!💕💕

@mister-brightside - Andrea my dear💕. Your art is always perfect and whenever i see a picture of izzy giving the middle finger i think about you! Its your brand and its your picture now and no one can change that. You are sweet and caring and a lovely mutual to have. thank you!💕💕

@merryfinches - Kylie 💕 What can i say more than that i ADORE your fanart. The colours the style the softness of it all is exactly what we all need in these times. Every single time it shows up on my dash it makes my heart grows softer and my love grow stronger! I love it so so much. 💕

@ofmd-ann - Ann 💕 You glorious glorious gifmaker! Your gifs are always beautiful and these last days you have saved me with your wrecked edits. As a supplier of rhys darby gifs i love you forever. You are a hero love. 💕💕

@usersukuna - Bia 💕You are a gif magician. Your gifs are perfect and you are also very kind and sweet and i am so glad i can call you a mutual! You light up tumblr like no one else and i am always happy to see you on my dash.💕💕

If you are not in this list it does not mean that i dont love you or have forgotten about you it means that tumblr has put a limit to how many people you can tag which sucks. But if i follow you then it means i love and appreciate you. 💕💕💕 And you know what? We will make it through this hard and trying times of greedy streaming services putting an end to our gay pirates show. I love you all and you know what??

We will make it through as A CREW!

[emilykaldwen]

The Maiden and the Drowning Boy | Aegon x OC | Chapter Twenty-Two

Rating: Explicit Ships: Aegon II Targaryen x Abrogail Strong (Lyonel Strong's Daughter), Jacaerys Velaryon x Helaena Targaryen

Summary: As the kingdom teeters on the edge of chaos, Alicent Hightower swaps the pieces on the board: Aegon will marry Abrogail Strong, Larys’ younger sister and heir to Harrenhal. Caught in the web of intrigue and political machinations, the pair must figure out where their loyalties lie, and what they mean to one another.

No tag list. please follow @emkald-fic and turn on post notifications for updates or subscribe on AO3

Tumblr Masterpost

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight | Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten | Chapter Eleven | Chapter Twelve | Chapter Thirteen | Chapter Fourteen | Chapter Fifteen | Chapter Sixteen | Chapter Seventeen | Chapter Eighteen | Chapter Nineteen | Chapter Twenty | Chapter Twenty-One

AO3 LINK

Author's Note: I started a new job and promptly got bronchitis for two weeks, was fine for a week, then covid. I LIVED BITCH! and my brain is mostly working.

all my undying love to @vampire-exgirlfriend who will never let me drown in this story. Your reacts for this were amazing (Aegon wants them to be old people in matching windbreakers, it is known). Also, many many thanks to @selfproclaimedunicorn for all the talking, the giggling, the gluck gluck 3000, just… thank you. Thank you for being you. ANOTHER thanks to @darkwolf76

for your eyes on the first half of this chapter and loving House Strong as much as I do.

Thank you to SelfProclaimedUnicorn for letting me borrow Cassana AND MOMMY AND DADDY YORICK AND SHIREEN and Rhea Royce my beloved, and Darkwolf76 for allowing me to borrow Deirdre and sweet baby Dyana. Please check out their work!

Also, there's River Tongue in the second section of this chapter, but no translations because Abby doesn't understand it. Something Something we're touching upon the eradication of irish culture under the british. I said what I said.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO - Do We Get What We Deserve?

The outer bailey was bustling with the mid-morning crowd, the banners of Runestone flapping from the back of two wheelhouses that were settled in front of the hall. Larys said something about their cousin, Cassana, having arrived. Aegon recalled that one of Ser Simon’s granddaughters was married to the lord’s younger brother. House Royce was a far friendlier kin to House Strong, it appeared.

Abby was there, being embraced by a soft featured, robust young woman with dark curls and a smiling face that reflected the rest of the Strongs. There was a tall man, dark blonde and kitted in shades of purple and bronze, a half cape slung about him like a knight from a story beside a comely woman who could only be his wife, given their matching outfits. Aegon considered this, as Abby already seemed to cleverly sneak in the embroidery of Sunfyre on her gowns. Maybe they could start matching, like the horses.

“Your Grace, Lord Larys.” Ser Simon’s voice interrupted Aegon’s internal adventure down a road where he and Abby had matching dragon coronets to receive the Royce party. “Lord Yorick Royce, and his wife, Lady Shireen Baratheon, are here as Lady Jeyne Arryn’s official representatives.”

The bow Lord Yorick gave was flawless, tightly controlled and not over the top, nor was his wife’s curtsy overly exhibitionist. There was a difference in the Vale chivalry than that of the Reach. Aegon supposed it might be because life in the Vale was harder, what with the mountains and all that came with it.

“Well met, my lord, my lady.” Aegon inclined his head in turn, smiling. “Tales of your deeds in the Stepstones are still told at court. I hope to see you in my wedding tournament?”

Lord Yorick’s beard was slightly darker than his hair, flecks of gray peaking through. Many of the men had beards and Aegon was beginning to feel like he should give his own a go. He was unshaven that morning, his own stubble scratchy along his jaw. Certainly he could grow a fine beard.

“You honor me, Prince Aegon,” the other man said, a slight smile on his face and a glance down at the brighter smile of his wife, her hands wrapped comfortably around his bicep. “If you are not competing, then I shouldn’t feel so bad being able to crown my wife the Queen of Love and Beauty.”

“We heard your own nameday duel went quite well, Your Grace,” Lady Shireen complimented, and Aegon’s ears flushed red. “A wonderful debut.”

“It is my wedding and I don’t think I’d be forgiven for getting a gauntlet to the face and having my sweet lady play nursemaid as a start to our marriage.” Aegon shrugged, a lazy grin on his face. It earned the chuckles and amusement he’d been looking for.

“Playing a little nursemaid can sometimes ease the nerves,” Lady Shireen leaned a little closer, her deep blue eyes bright with mischief. Aegon could see the slight glimmers of resemblance between the lady and that of her niece, Cassandra, but the lady of Runestone lacked the predatory look that the younger woman held. Lady Shireen’s edges were softer in a way that reminded him of the hazy memories of Aunt Celeste, and even Abby in some of her more confident moments.

Aegon was very conscious not to let his eyes fall below the woman’s face.

Lord Yorick’s own cheeks flushed lightly, but he shrugged with a raised eyebrow in agreement. “There’s plenty of time for the prince to be given advice on his marital duties. We’ve been on the road since dawn, and I could use a bath.” They departed with courtesies exchanged and Aegon approached Abby who was giving a final embrace to her cousin.

“Deidre will be in the gardens with little Dyana,” she told Cassana. “And Morya has Gwenys as well.”

Aegon’s hand snaked out to grab her wrist and tug her over to him, automatically snaking his arms around her waist and pressing his face into the loose curls around her shoulders, half her hair woven in a braided knot at the crown of her head.

“Aegon,” she breathed.

He didn’t know if it was a protest or relief and he simply squeezed her tighter and pressed his lips to her pulse. It was easier to push away everything else that plagued him and sickened him when he was here with her. A tonic to his raw wounds, Aegon let himself drift into the clean scent of earthy rose and red currant perfume oil and soap.

“Did you eat?”

Her frustrated sigh was low in his ear, her hands pressing against his shoulders even if she wasn’t pushing him away. “Did you tell Wylla to make sure I did, or was that simply her being her usual bossy self?”

“I might have mentioned something in passing, but the gods know she won’t take orders from me.” But they had reached an understanding between themselves, in recognizing that they needed to make sure Abrogail Strong did not run herself empty as she was wont to do.

She tilted her head back and her fingers curled in his jacket. He knew he smelled of dragon and rain but she didn’t appear to mind. Her freckles were stark against her pale face and he took in the dark smudges beneath her eyes, but her cheeks were flushed with excitement, and so he did not worry overly much.

“Lord Elmo and some of the other river lords are here to discuss our marriage contract,” Abby said softly. “I think it took the queen and the lord hand by surprise.”

“Larys told me.” Aegon nodded towards the slow moving figure moving in the direction of the tower where his father and the royal household were put up. Abby moved to tuck her cool hand in the crook of his elbow, her other holding the blue wool cloak more tightly closed around her throat. It was a bit chilly that morning, although Aegon’s blood ran too hot to usually notice. “Elmo thinks I’ve come to take his paramount seat from him and feed him to Sunfyre.”

“I think he would still be upset even without the dragon,” she murmured. She’d told him of the rumors she’d heard during his feast, about how some of the lords were upset with the idea of a Targaryen encroaching onto their land. Which Aegon thought was utterly ridiculous. Abby had pointed out that when a Targaryen came into the Riverlands, they tended to conquer or cause other trouble. His gaze flicked to the melted towers high above them—the hubris and legacy of men come and gone long before him. “If someone is displeased with his ruling, then what’s to stop them from coming to you as a representative of the crown?”

“They just assume I’d hear them and not just send them on their merry way,” he scoffed with a bitter note to his voice. She squeezed his arm.

“It doesn’t matter, Aegon. It’s the perception of it. The implied threat. Not to mention the succession. If you’re seen as a figure in the Riverlands over the Tullys, that would change things.” As always, Abrogail was right when he let himself listen to her explanations. It wasn’t as if they hadn’t discussed it before, a plate of honey and cream cakes between them, her hands occupied with sewing while he fed her and himself. Still, he rolled his eyes, dragging his booted foot back and forth over the gravel and kicking up rocks.

“They’re already calling our wedding The Second Great Council,” Aegon sneered. “They’re all so eager to force such ambitions upon me.”

“Tis foul,” Abby returned with her own disgust. “At least we know what we’re up against.” Aegon’s chest warmed with her ‘we’ mention and he ghosted a kiss against her temple. The guards at the door to the tower bowed their heads and opened the heavy doors, whitewashed to hide the scars from the fire.

“We do,” Aegon murmured, shifting his arm to wrap around her shoulders and keep her close to him as they ventured into the tower where her family had perished. She trembled lightly beneath his touch and he gripped her arm, thumb stroking against the round of her shoulder. She was doing so well, holding herself together. He would give her what strength he had.

The hum of conversation could be heard as they headed down the hallway, the inner windows allowing the torchlight into the interior in lieu of outer windows.

“I hate the name,” Abby muttered, “Tower of Dread.”

“Then we’ll change it along with whatever other name changes you wish to make.” He raised his eyebrows at her, making a silly face, and Abby scrunched her nose as amusement pulled at her pretty mouth.

She was straight as an arrow as she walked, years of lessons pulling her spine rigid and tilting her chin just so. It was a facsimile of his own mother’s posture when faced with those who would underestimate her. Regal. Elegant.

Aegon dropped his arm from around her shoulders to stroke the spill of curls down her back before offering his arm to her so she could hold onto that instead of gripping her own hands so tightly about her waist he thought she might break her fingers. His own heart hammered in his chest, to be faced with all these lords and know that each moment in that room was a different level of judgment and assessment than he’d received those months before. Aegon had gotten on well with the men at the feast, plying them with fine wine and bawdy stories. He was good at that sort of thing; it’s when things became formal and full of layers that he didn’t understand that he struggled with.

“You’ll do well,” she whispered.

He pressed a quick kiss to her hair. “We’ll do well.” There was no doing this without her; he didn’t even want to try.

The second set of heavy wooden doors were opened, these ones newer than the others, to reveal the circular hall and the blazing fire in the great hearth that was taller than a man and just as ornately carved as the one in the Kingspyre tower. Some of the plaster frescoes high above them were patchy in places, revealing where new plaster had been replaced but not yet painted. There were tapestries similar to the ones in the other tower, these depicting hunting scenes along rivers and through weirwood forests. Aegon was distracted momentarily by one depicting women with flowing hair reaching out through the rivers, fish fins along their arms.

The table in the hall was enormous; a great wheel of wood cut from one of those great red oaks in the forest. Seated here, all were on the same level. There was no head of table, even if Queen Alicent sat in the mostore ornate chair there. It was the only denotation of status.

“Where is the king?” Aegon inquired of Grand Maester Orwyle. Mellos had retired back to Oldtown at the close of the nameday festivities to live out his last days in quiet. Aegon had felt relief at the change; the younger maester was far easier to deal with and didn’t look at him with rheumy eyes full of disdain.

Orwyle inclined his head to both of them, his hands folded beneath the large, gray sleeves of his robe and his maester chain clinking. “He is recovering from the long journey. He has bid the queen and Hand to handle these discussions Lord Elmo has…” The man trailed off, lips pressed together in disapproval, but of what specifically, Aegon didn’t know. “Found need of. It is good that you are both here.”

It was a surprising statement of encouragement that left Aegon momentarily stunned, Abby’s fingers curling into the leather of his riding jacket he still hadn’t changed out of. There hadn’t been time and it wasn’t as if Larys had brought a change of shirt for him. No matter. They were so concerned about his dragon and his title, let them be aware of it. His riding leathers were made of supple black leather with scalloped detailing along the shoulders and down his arms that looked like dragon scales. There was a shimmer in the leather when the light caught on it that gave the iridescent glimmer of gold from the gold thread stitching, and the buttons were gold as well, stamped with dragons. The lining was a fine, deep green and gold wool brocade, and the inside of the neck and his cuffs were a soft shearling lining. High in the sky, even his dragon blood could only do so much, and the garment would prove too warm soon enough. He was already tugging at the stamped buttons with his free hand, his other arm still clutched by Abby.

“Good morrow, my lords,” he called out with every ounce of mustered levity he could, leading Abby towards the vacant chairs on his mother’s right side. “Morning, Lord Hand,” he greeted his grandfather, who stood to Mother’s left, hand resting on the back of his chair. He leaned down to ghost a kiss upon his mother’s cheek, feeling her startle. “Mother, you look well rested.”

“Good morning, Aegon.” Mother’s dark brown eyes widened with surprise, an uncertain smile gracing her lovely face. “You were up early?”

“Nothing like beginning the day on dragonback and greeting Prince Daemon upon his arrival,” Aegon said, a brief, close lipped smile on his face before pulling out the chair to his left for Abby to sit in, and taking the seat immediately to his mother’s side. “It’s good that I returned as early as I did. Lord Elmo! It’s wonderful to see you again, as well as the other familiar faces here.” He grinned brightly at the assembly all while sick sloshed in his gut, the ribbon around his ribs tightening with the edges of panic. A servant poured him a goblet of weak wine.

Lord Elmo Tully was tall and deceptively broad, his coat a deep, dark blue with scarlet, four strand braids that looked like fishbones along his shoulders, red trim along his wrists. As he drew closer, Aegon noticed the buttons along the front of his coat were in the shape of fish, and the brocade pattern along the hem were also stamped in silver scale print. His face was tanner than when he saw him last; clearly a man who preferred riding horseback instead of a wheelhouse.

Handsome, to be certain, and Aegon wouldn’t forget that Tully had also sought Abby’s hand. Regardless of what Larys said, Aegon couldn’t fathom that he was not bothered by losing out on the chance for her. It was foolish to think otherwise. And Aegon didn’t think he could blame her had she picked Lord Elmo Tully over him. Seven hells, Aegon would have picked Elmo Tully had he been in her place.

“Likewise, your Grace.” His voice was low and smooth, water over river stones. While some of the others looked visibly surprised by Aegon’s entrance, other’s did not, and it appeared that Elmo Tully was unflappable as they came. “Although I know this conversation will be a complicated one. As I was stating to Lord Otto and her grace, vassals of mine have come forward with concerns over the past few months and I’m inclined to agree with them.”

His bright eyes cut away to look at Larys who was seated beside his grandfather. Aegon watched him settle comfortably in his chair.

“I must confess, I am confused as to why a contract that is not only approved by the crown, but by our Lord Paramount, Lord Grover Tully, is now suddenly drawn into question, and additionally, why my fellow lords are viewing myself in such a light.” Larys folded his hands on the table in front of him, a glance towards the Tower beside him. “I understand a certain amount of skepticism was raised by some, but as a beloved member of the queen’s household, my sweet sister-”

“There is no record of Lady Abrogail’s wardship under Queen Alicent,” Elmo Tully cut in, the room silent as his deep voice echoed across the large table. “House Tully had first right as your liege lord, Strong. Your father stated he was not interested in warding the girl.”

“Extenuating circumstances, Lord Elmo,” Otto Hightower did not raise his voice, but it carried to every part of the room. Aegon reached for his goblet and sipped from it to hide his confusion, wishing he had bread and some kind of meat to settle the alcohol in his gut from the night before. Larys hadn’t mentioned anything about Abby’s wardship during the carriage ride. Beside him, Abby was still, but her hand reached beneath the table to rest on his knee. It was purely comfort; for him or her, Aegon didn’t know, but he dropped his free hand down to tap two fingers against the back of hers in reassurance. “Lord Lyonel Strong was a member of the king’s Small Council, his wife, my niece, and the queen’s first cousin.”

“In addition,” Mother continued with a look of disapproval that he knew well and was grateful not to be under, “I had helped raise the girl since she was a babe. It was agreed between Lord Larys and myself that to remove her from my care would further upset her after all she had already endured. There was no reason to rip her from everything she knew.”

Aegon watched the eyes around the table swivel to look at Abby beside him and he turned their hands beneath the table so he could hold hers. Her fingers were cold and he gripped them tight.

“Abrogail had served as a companion to Princess Helaena since they were young girls,” Larys spoke, his words slow and deliberate. “The crown did not purchase her wardship before our father died, nor after, because I did not sell it.”

“Her ward price was nearly a thousand gold dragons!” Elmo snapped, his jaw ticking. “A portion of which would be paid to House Tully as your liege lord.”

“And the greater portion to House Targaryen, your liege lord,” Mother said sharply, the reprimand subtle but clear. “Are you upset, my lord, that your house lost income in this deal you’ve imagined having taken place?” Elmo’s nostrils flared. Mother frowned and waved to the servant closest to her. “It is early, and we have only just arrived. Please bring light refreshment. I think we could all use a bit of something to eat. I did not have time to properly break my fast this morning.”

Abby relaxed beside him and Aegon felt his stomach rumble as within moments plates were brought in and platters of freshly carved ham and steaming loaves of fresh bread were brought in. A sweet porridge with honey and molasses, morsels of dried fruit tucked inside, was set in front of them.

“You need to eat,” he murmured, spooning some of the porridge onto her plate along with a piece of ham. He helped himself to the crusty bread and slathered the red currant preserves across it, licking a bit from his thumb. He leaned over and whispered, “You are worth far more than a measly thousand dragons.” Abby scoffed but she picked up her spoon to take little bites.

Aegon looked to his mother who was helping herself to a piece of bread with delicate bites, and he realized that she had planned this. Larys had not spoken of Abby’s wardship, only of Aegon and Sunfyre being a threat. To get Tully on the defensive and make him look like his only issue with everything was due to money, not the perception that Aegon was here to cause trouble for him. Aegon looked at the other lords around the table, filing away his realization to think about later.

Elmo Tully’s face was no longer flushed with frustration. In King’s Landing, the man had been quiet, observant, but he’d also been with his father, who was the ruling lord. He leaned in conference with Lord Piper beside him, nodding quietly before straightening.

“Clearly there is much confusion that needs to be clarified for the peace of our vassals,” Elmo began again, his jaw no longer clenched and a slightly more relaxed curve to his shoulders. “Many have been under the ugly assumption that the laws of wardship were not followed. As we all know, the practice of warding our precious children is what helps keep the peace, strengthens ties, and ultimately serves our houses and the realm.”

“I completely agree with you, Lord Elmo,” Mother smiled her tight lipped smile that brought the youthful light back to her face. Elmo averted his eyes briefly and Aegon’s own narrowed a touch at the man’s reaction. “I can assure you, Lady Abrogail was never my official ward, although there are those who used the term for ease of explanation. She served as my daughter’s much loved companion, and I imparted the knowledge I had to her future role as a Lady just as I did when her mother was alive.” She let the silence hang with an expectant look.

Aegon noticed that neither his mother nor Elmo Tully offered any apology to one another.

“With that matter settled,” Otto said, wiping his fingers on a soft towel to be handed to the servant. “You made mention of several disturbing accusations towards the Crown that we felt were better discussed in casual conference behind closed doors than in the throne room in King’s Landing.”

“Several of my vassals expressed discomfort with Houses Bracken and Blackwood as well as House Tully being called before the Small Council. Additionally, this summons was then accompanied by the announcement that the king’s eldest son would be the next Lord of Harrenhal.” Elmo pushed his half empty plate to the side, the last bite of crusty bread abandoned. ‘A travesty,’ Aegon thought, and popped the last piece of his bread into his mouth. It was a little too big, his cheeks puffed slightly around it, but there was no choice but to commit. Now he was keeping up with the information Larys had given him. So not only did Elmo, who was pretending to be the acting Lord over his dying father, believe that Aegon was coming for his seat, but he also clearly believed that House Targaryen had what? Stolen Abby? Held her hostage to take her claim?

Aegon’s gaze flicked to his mother and grandfather briefly, but both their faces were impassive, schooled features impossible to tell what it was they were thinking.

“To be clear on the concern,” came the rasping voice of Lord Piper from Elmo’s right. The lord was older, thin as a reed, his graying brown hair curled around his ears and neck. “The Brackens and Blackwoods will tear each other apart any chance they get. It is an issue that myself and fellow houses are concerned about. We were fortunate that under his Grace, King Jaehaerys, peace had been brokered. With the wedding of Lord Bracken’s daughter to House Karstark and the discussions held in the capital, tensions appear to have eased. Some feel that this was the decision behind this marriage, and the presence of the crown in the Riverlands.”

The quiet after the statement was uncomfortable, and Aegon coughed as he swallowed his piece of bread. That also matched with what Abby had said Lythene Ryger had told her all those months ago. He ventured a look to his bride. Her face was pale except for the splotches of bright color in her cheeks, her rosebud mouth pursed with discomfort.

“Then allow me to gladly free you of these misconceptions, my lords,” Mother said, her chin tilted up and her gaze meeting each lord and lady in turn before finally landing on Elmo Tully. Her elbows rested on the arms of the ornate chair, hands folded loosely in front of her. She was utterly relaxed now and Aegon found himself mimicking the posture, even if he felt nervous and on edge. The food in his belly helped. He could feel Abby’s anxieties from her place beside him as keenly as if they were his own. She needed him to be calm. She needed his strength. His mother needed him to be reasonable. He could do this. “During Lord Lyonel’s time as Hand of the King, he and the king had discussed this betrothal. I had also discussed this betrothal with him on numerous occasions. Harrenhal had nothing to do with these conversations. Unless there’s the implication that he had a premonition of what was to happen here…”

The air rushed from his lungs, accompanied by a surprising sense of relief. Instinct compelled him to lift Abby’s hand and press a light kiss to her knuckles, holding her hand in both of his for a moment. She was finally starting to warm up and he looked to see her tension ease and finally relax back in her chair, if only a little.

Elmo Tully held Mother’s gaze for a long time, their eyes locked in some sort of silent conversation or contest, Aegon could not be sure.

“This idea that the crown would overstep themselves and park a dragon on your doorstep over squabbling houses is ludicrous, Lord Elmo,” his grandfather finally said. “We understand how the perception could have come about. Those who wish to sew discontent will always look for nooks and crannies to slither through.”

“No?” Elmo asked mildly, an arch of his brow as he propped his arms on his elbows, large hands folded in front of him. He wore no rings on his fingers, Aegon noticed. “Law states that through her marriage, Harrenhal will become Prince Aegon’s. He is not bringing lands to this marriage and instead, Lady Abrogail’s dowry is providing everything in this union. Seven protect her, should she pass without issue, Harrenhal becomes the prince’s… and then the lands will eventually pass to the crown.”

The implication was clear. Aegon was still the eldest son. Should Viserys change his mind on matters of succession and Aegon named King, then Harrenhal, its income and lands would pass from the Riverlands and become part of the Crownlands.

“The prince is bringing a dragon to the marriage,” his grandfather’s voice was equally mild, even amused.

“Should Prince Aegon pass without issue, Harrenhal will still be in the hands of my sister,” Larys spoke, reaching for his goblet. “It will not default to the crown, nor the prince’s next of kin. Abrogail will maintain her hold.”

“And what is to prevent the crown from simply marrying her to another one of the king’s sons?” Lord Mudd spoke this time. It was the conversation that his father hated and could only happen with him still abed. Aegon instinctively felt the prickle of anxiety and the shortness of breath that came when discussions that edged on the succession, as well as the terrible idea that Abby would just be given to Aemond or Daeron. Daeron was just a boy and the idea of Aemond and Abrogail in that way made Aegon’s blood boil, teeth aching to snap his jaw around his brother’s throat and rip it out. It didn’t matter if Aemond was betrothed, or if he didn’t covet Abby in the least. The mere thought of it incensed him.

She belonged to him, and to think her alone and vulnerable without him had Aegon threading his fingers through hers, the closest he could come to splitting open his ribs and trapping her inside where she’d be warm and protected, worth more than a thousand gold dragons or this castle or her inheritance.

Abby squeezed his hand with both of hers, thumb stroking along the back of his hand and he looked down at her. She was there, he was there. The tension eased only some.

“And should Lady Abrogail pass in childbirth without issue?” Posed Tully this time. Aegon thought he was going to be sick at the thought of it. The talk of all this death, hers and his, it hung over him like a specter, as if it were an unspoken wish. “Prince Aegon would hold ownership-”

“I do find it interesting how we are so quick to assume that I will die within a month of their marriage and not live a long life,” Larys cut in, a placid smile on his face. “It is only a deformed foot that I live with, not palpitations of the heart or fever or grayscale…” He trailed off with a wave of his hand. Tully and Lord Mudd both shifted uncomfortably in their seats. Beside him, Mother lifted her goblet and he could see the amusement on her face that she was trying to hide. Larys’ words were enough to cut through the tension and Aegon huffed out a snort. Abby giggled quietly beside him.

“Apologies, Lord Larys,” Elmo said. “But these are important discussions.”

“And the assumption that I myself would not have also thought of and worked out with the final negotiations?” Larys Strong shook his head, lips pursed. For a man who did not speak often, he had slid into the moment well. “I must say, the lack of faith you appear to have in me not only as a lord of a holding, but a member of the Small Council, and your direct vassal are fully on display and I am concerned that if these things were shared by Lord Grover, that it was never brought up during the prince’s celebrations.”

Once more, Aegon saw that Larys Strong had Elmo Tully on the back foot in front of several of the houses in attendance. There was no illusion to the privacy of this conference. Not from the servants in attendance, nor from the lords and ladies who would discuss this with others. He wondered if this was normal discussion between vassals and their lords. The mediation between Houses Bracken and Blackwood with House Tully in attendance had gone differently. His mother had defended House Tully when certain implications had come up. It was exhausting to watch and process, and Aegon felt like they were circling.

Elmo’s face hardened. “Lord Strong, you leave the running of Harrenhal to your castellian. You have not been in the Riverlands for any extended period of time since before your father took office as Master of Laws and later Hand of the King. I correspond more frequently with Ser Simon than I have with you until recently. What am I left to assume of you, my lord?”

“To be asked to serve the realm is the highest honor, Lord Elmo, and I do not regret my position, and neither did my father. Each raven sent to Harrenhal is reviewed and passed onto myself where my replies are sent directly to House Tully. I do not know the workings of the paramount house, and I am disinclined to assume anything, as it serves none. Your concern and those of my fellow vassals are noted, and our great queen and Lord Otto have been nothing but above board in our negotiations between the prince and my sister.” He inclined his head in the direction of Mother and grandfather, who returned the gesture. “Queen Alicent and her father work tirelessly with the king and any concerns that you have with his Grace's choices and decisions should be brought up directly with him.”

Silence filled the room once more and Aegon looked at Elmo Tully, stone faced and displeased at the failure of whatever outcome he’d been hoping for.

“Your concerns for Lady Abrogail are well intentioned, Lord Elmo,” Mother said. “And you do well to bring the concerns your vassals have to us, although I do wish we had discussed these sooner, and not on the eve of my son’s wedding.” The gentle rebuke was a statement of the obvious and she leaned back in her seat. “The assumptions made that the crown would engage in duplicitous behavior to undermine the sacred agreement between vassals and their liege lords will not be taken to heart and will be left at this table. I can also assure you, Lord Elmo, and your fellow lords, as well as Lord Tully, that the king and I thought long about this betrothal. The king had discussed this previously with Lord Strong and subsequently the new Lord Strong, and was happy to join our families. If there are further concerns, then when his Grace has recovered from the journey, we will be more than happy to discuss any lingering concerns. Are there?”

“Lord Mallister isn’t here because of Ironborn ships spotted near the Cape of Eagles.” It was Lord Ryger’s turn to speak up now. “They raided a few of the villages along the bay last year.”

“Then a dragon here in the Riverlands will be helpful,” Aegon declared with a grin. Not that he was happy about burned villages, but they were much further from his mind than this prime opening. “King’s Landing is but a few hours flight from here, so I would imagine the Cape of Eagles would be similar. It could be enough to scare them off.”

A murmur washed through the room, the tone much different than the distrustful gazes and whispers that held them only moments before. It didn’t matter if Elmo Tully and the other lords believed his mother and grandfather or not. Aegon had seen the opening to something that mattered far more: the safety and protection of these people. Flush with finding his way, Aegon stood, chair scraping across the flagstone, and tugged his riding leathers off. It was much too hot and sweat had started gathering along the nape of his neck. He rested a hand along the back of Abby’s chair, his body inclined towards hers.

“I understand your concerns, and I have listened to them in earnest. If you can be reassured of my commitment to your house, Lord Elmo, and to our fellow houses, then take this thusly. Our children will be of the Riverlands. I am as much invested in the safety and wellbeing and protection of these lands from the Ironborn and whomever else chooses to attempt to press advantage. I swear myself to this. And if there are still sore feelings over… whatever happened in the past in regards to wardship, then I would happily ward one of your sons, Lord Elmo. My younger brother, Daeron, would benefit from boys his own age, as he will be here squiring for my uncle, Ser Gwayne.” Aegon tilted his head, catching Tully’s gaze with a slight smile. “Ser Harwin spoke positively of his time squiring with you at Riverrun in his youth.”

“He did,” Abby said, her voice soft but steady. “And perhaps we can discuss in the future one of our sons fostering with you at Riverrun. My father always reassured me of the ease the partnership between our houses had, and we would like to continue that tradition. I may have grown up away from here, but the rivers run through my blood; Harrenhal is my home. Our people are my kin. The prince speaks truly. Our children will be raised with the customs and traditions of our home, and Aegon and Sunfyre will fiercely protect the sanctity of our realm.”

Many heads were nodding and Elmo’s gaze pinned Aegon in place and he met it without hesitation. Whatever his mother and grandfather plotted, it was beyond Aegon’s knowing. What he did know was that he needed to prove himself to Elmo Tully and the Riverlords, and finally start ripping these assumptions that he was some eager villain set to usurp everyone in his path. He tried to convey that in his look, his hand dropping from the back of Abby’s chair to her shoulder, fingers curling protectively over her slim shoulder. He didn’t want the throne. He didn’t want Tully’s seat. Aegon wanted a home.

Abby, and Harrenhal, were what he wanted.

Abby sat still as Sarra Frey wound spring flowers into her hair and Lythene knelt before her, tracing blue ink along her hands and bared arms. The gown she wore had slashed sleeves, a style she did not often wear without tighter sleeves beneath and the cool air spread goosebumps along her skin. Coupled with the ticklish tracing of the cold woad, she was doing her best not to shiver too much.

“You all have strange customs,” Rhea Royce said, crunching into a juicy, red apple, the juice running down her chin and she swiped it away with the back of her hand. “Won’t that paint turn her blue for days?”

“They make you visit the Bronze Kings for blessings at Runestone,” Cousin Cassana pointed out with a laugh, handing over fussy little Dyana to her mother, her elder sister Deirdre. “You know how those crypts are. I still feel like I’m being watched.”

“Besides,” Deirdre added, cooing at her daughter. “Woad doesn’t stain, and most certainly won’t stand up with all the wedding preparations.”

“Ah yes.” It was Wylla’s turn now, knocking her foot against Rhea’s knee as she leaned against a moss and ivy covered stump at the edge of the blanket. “We’re making an Abby stew of hot water and goat milk. What could survive? Lythene, do you think we could go ahead and paint her all over? Is that a custom here?”

Abby rolled her eyes with a smile as the women around her laughed at the joke. “I am sitting right here,” she pointed out in mock exasperation. “I like this. It lets me feel closer to my family.” Her cousins would remember if her mother had partaken in the riverland custom. She knew, of course, that Aunt Mya certainly had, as did great-grandmother Sabitha. Mayhaps her grandmother, Addison Lefford, did as well, although she was also technically a Westerlander. Abby had been overly worried that she wouldn’t get this, that the queen would overrule it in the name of legitimacy for Aegon.

She might have, until Elmo Tully and the other banners sat at the great table the day before to accuse dragons of coming to feast on fish.

Sarra’s fingers snagged on a knot and Abby hissed at the painful pull while the other girl immediately apologized. “Almost done,” she promised.

“I’m nervous,” Abby said while Lythene finished the swirl up near her shoulder. The green gown was not the traditional blue of a Riverlands bride, and it wasn’t anywhere near the style that usually was done, but it had made do in a pinch and Abby did her best to ignore the pang of inadequacy that kept threatening to surge up. It was a low, little thrum in the back of her mind, telling her that she was a false thing, that she had no claim to a heritage she’d been taught to be proud of, for she had not spent long summer days in the fields chasing lambs or taking oaths and prayers beneath the weirwoods and the seven in the family godswood.

It was said that the Harrenhal godswood was the largest in the realm - even bigger than Winterfell’s, which Abby had a difficult time believing. Wylla had no answers to it, since it had been some time since she had seen her cousin, the now Lord Cregan, but said that Harrenhal’s was very large. It was as if a whole forest had been encased in the castle walls. Abby thought it more than a little strange, since Harren the Black had no issue in chopping down every remaining weirwood grove for leagues to build the fortress, yet he left this one standing and even protected. Was his wife a maiden of the Riverlands? Had she managed to appeal to some sliver of better nature to protect this one tree from being sacrificed to Harren’s hunger? This tree that was witness to the fall of crimson leaves and bone bark, chopped and stripped and brutalized and splashed with blood of their people.

Wylla tugged on her hand and pulled her from the spiral of thoughts that clouded what was meant to be the happiest of times. “You. Get over here.”

“I am,” she grumbled and allowed Wylla to pull her along, gripping her skirts to make their way through the untended and overgrown path. A stream ran through the godswood and Abby let the sound of rushing water push away the shadowy haze that her thoughts had turned to more frequently since they’d arrived. What a sour and unhappy bride they must think she was. Wylla tucked their arms in together and she relaxed into it after all the time apart, finding comfort in her friend and her unwavering spirit beside her. The other girls laughed ahead of them, Rhea lingering on her own as she took in the sights and the crunch of her apple. Cassana, Deirdre, and little Dyana followed a bit behind, the sister’s catching up after their years apart. She was not alone even if the presence of what was lost lingered in every birdsong and every shadow of the towers. “Father would not wish me sad,” Abby confessed for Wylla’s ears alone. “But I cannot help it.”

“Of course you can’t,” she said reasonably. “But he would not want his absence to hinder your joy. You are happy, aren’t you? If you are not, I will deal with Aegon myself.”

“Are you simply looking for an excuse to do so?” Abby teased and Wylla had the grace to flush at being caught out.

“No, not… he’s been better.”

“He has. And I do like to see the both of you getting along, even if it’s about minding me like I can’t take care of myself.” She shook her head but there was a warmth of fondness at their apparent arrangement. Abby did not need minding; she was capable of looking after herself, but it warmed her to know that they were looking after her as well. “I am happy - to answer your question. I trust the gods to ensure that athair knows of my happiness, and mother sees it too.” Abby rubbed her thumb against Wylla’s black and silver sleeve to reassure her and herself, and found that her mood had lightened as they trooped their way through the woods.

“Here we are,” Deirdre announced, bringing the group to a stop. They had followed the steam through the forest for a good quarter of an hour, the path clear if overgrown. Here they came to a stop, not quite at the heart tree. Abby would make the final trek herself. Her elder cousin came to her side, a soft smile on her face and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. “Go, a leanbh, and speak with them.”

Her hands shook and Abby wiped her palms along the green wool of her gown. Wylla squeezed her arm with encouragement and they parted for her, letting Abby push through the last of the trees on her own.

Past the oaks and the evergreen, the bone white boughs of the great heart tree rose up. The stream widened here into a pool at the foot of the weirwood. Abby’s arms exploded into goosebumps and a hard shiver rolled down her spine, like the rushing of the water over the moss covered rocks before her. It was larger than the one in King’s landing, twisted and broad, reaching as high as it could towards the sun above. Her eyes searched for a way to approach, as she did not have any little raft to cross the waters. She remembered warnings as a child to be careful of the stream as there were spots that were far deeper than they appeared. Finally, she found the sliver of forest floor that reached the tree and she crossed it, another shiver coursing over her as if she stepped through some sort of threshold.

Before her, the tree stood, ancient and all knowing, holding the spirits of all who came before them. Abby noticed, being this close, that none of the other trees came near, as if they knew the weirwood needed room in this captive place.

You’re alone.

The thought struck Abby like a crossbow bolt between her ribs and she blinked past the tears that filled her eyes. The weirwood tree was alone here and it must be so foolish of her to feel such empathy for it but she couldn’t help it.

“I have returned,” she said, dropping her skirts and staring up at the angry face of the tree. “I have been gone for so long I do not know if I remember the song of the rivers, but I know that it’s called me all these years.”

There was no answer. Of course there wasn’t, but she waited all the same, meeting the hateful eyes of the visage before her. It was no surprise to her that the weirwood looked angry. It had watched slaughter and pain. Helpless, the both of them were when it came to the protection of their family, and Abby felt the heat surge through her chest, the anger she so rarely gave into burning brightly in this moment.

“I can’t bring them back, and I wish I could make them pay for what they’ve done,” she cried and closed the distance to stand closer to the face. So close now, she could see the fissures in the bark and so clearly the red staining of the sap. “I can only vow to you, on my life and my children, that we will protect these lands from fire and salt, from the cruel reach of our enemies.”

These were not the blessings asked from a blushing bride. Abby didn’t know what feeling possessed her. She only knew the certainty that the weirwood’s loneliness and her own could not be bidden. They shared this thread, this lonely thread, and she inhaled sharply. “You called me all these years, didn't you? You are why this place has always felt like home to me when I had no answer for it, isn’t it?”

The leaves whispered in the wind.

The stream continued to rush.

Abby continued to meet the angry gaze of the weirwood staring back at her.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I was gone for so long.” Abby took a step, pulling her skirts up to make sure she didn’t trip climbing over the large, gnarled and moss covered roots of the tree. Tentatively, she reached a hand out as if touching the face’s cheek. She was meant to be saying prayers and asking for blessings like the Children of the Forest were above her in the boughs, listening and taking note.

This felt more right. She didn’t understand why but only knew that it felt like whatever had drawn her away from camp the other morning and towards the Red Wood. Abby wished she could put it to words. She wished that she understood all that was happening.

“Sióg bheag.”

She was speechless, her fingers curled against the trunk and her other hand gripping her gown. She could only hear the stream and the water. She couldn’t hear little Dyana’s babbles, or the laughter of Wylla. Abby shivered again. There were no dragon calls, she realized. There was nothing except the pool of water and the weirwood and them.

The man was tall. At least, Abby thought it was a man. He stood on the other side of the tree, the water of the pool lapping along knees covered by rough, dark green trousers, his tunic woven of leaves of dappled green and red, his arms bare and big like the strongman she’d seen fight the last feast day of the Warrior. It was the antlers that her gaze was ultimately drawn too. Antlers that looked like they were sprouting from his wiry red hair, bone white as weirwood boughs. His face was square and ruddy and worn, skin like leather, his beard long and hairy.

“Níl aon rud sa saol seo ach na crainn agus ní bheidh muid beo ach ar feadh tamaill bhig,” the man spoke, his voice rough as river stones, worn as if abused by smoke. His eyes were dark and his gaze impossible to tear away from. Abby frantically attempted to discern what he said. Trees? Life?

“I…” She swallowed and forced herself to breathe. She did know these words, even on a long forgotten level. “We will only be alive a short time… Pangur Bán… Pangur Bán….” Abby sang the last words uncertainly as the lullaby tugged at her deep memory. The words cracked from her, creaky from disuse as she sang. “An dorchadas a chasadh chun solais…”

Turn the darkness to light.

Silence fell and the weirwood’s leaves shuddered. Something tickled against her hair and cheek and Abby lifted her hand to pluck away one of the crimson leaves that had fallen.

“Duais tine gréine,” he said, tilting his head up to the sky. “Duais fola.” Prize? Sun prize? She didn’t not understand what sort of prize he meant by fola, a word she wasn’t familiar with.

“I don’t understand,” Abby confessed. Her voice trembled and she hated it. She hated that she was struggling with words spoken to her in the cradle. Words that were a part of her but long left unspoken and now rusty and creaky with disuse. “I want to understand.” She tilted her head, watching the way the antlers looked beneath the dappled light. “You’re from the Isle of Faces, aren’t you?”

He inclined his head slightly in what she could only assume was confirmation and she bowed her head in return. The Green Men were the protectors of the weirwoods, of the most ancient practices. Pilgrims seldom visited the Isle, but they did, many choosing to stay among the small community to pray, to protect the trees, to practice whatever vestiges of the magic that was left before the Children had vanished far away.

She tried to find the words and they came out pathetic to her ears. “I came for my wedding blessing. I didn't mean to disrupt your quiet.”

“A bride for Harrenhal.” The common tongue was so clear that Abby blinked, stunned into silence. “They leave quickly. Sickness. Water. Poison.”

Harwin’s mother had died from Winter fever and her own had died from a long illness. Larys and Cory’s mother had drowned. None that she knew of had been poisoned.

A bride with a broken neck. How tragic.

Abby’s knees buckled and she sat heavily down on the gnarled roots as the air was knocked from her. She tried to swallow and push the words out but her throat was closed and her eyes were hot. A shudder rocked her frame. She was so exhausted from her grief that Abby thought she should find it a relief that it would not be her grief to bear this time, but the idea of being parted from Aegon, from leaving him alone to the further machinations of his mother and grandfather, to whatever the realm chose. Would they think he had poisoned her? Would he be held up as the criminal by Elmo Tully?

To not wake up in his arms every morning? To not taste his kisses, to not feel his arms around her holding her together and trying to lend her strength?

It was a damning hell. It was not peace. It was not solace, it was agony.

“In four moons, you will be blessed.”

She blinked past the angry tears in her eyes. “What? But you just said-”

“In four moons, the gods will bless you.” He turned in dismissal and she pushed from the roots, crying out after him to ‘Wait!’ but he didn’t. What did this even mean? Was she going to die in four moons? Would the gods save her in four moons?

“Please! I don’t know!” She cried again, tears rolling down her cheeks. The Green Man mounted the bank and Abby drew back as she got a look at his legs. They weren’t human legs, they were like a deer’s: bent and furred.

Then, he was gone and Abby was alone.

Her and the weirwood tree.

Did you like this chapter? WHAT ARE YOUR THEORIES? What excited you the most? What questions do you have? I'm here to answer! And if you don't know what to say, please reblog to spread the love <3 THREE CHAPTERS LEFT.

NEXT CHAPTER

[autism-autobot]

LMK Angst Fic Part 4: (I ran out of funny rhyming titles)

TW: Suicidal ideation/attempt, death, (if I missed any please let me know)

Part 3 if you haven't read it yet:

"You planned on using the Samadhi Fire to do WHAT????!!!!!"

Wukong didn't expect his brother to be this upset and downright horrified when he found out about his original plan to put an end to the Lady Bone Demon.

Ever since his recent "incident" Nezha has refused to leave Sun Wukong anywhere alone. Nezha stayed days and nights with him in fear of something happening to Wukong, and occasionally something would, but never to the extremes that he reached that night. They would switch between staying at Flower Fruit Mountain and staying at Nezha's house in the celestial realm. Wherever they were, Nezha would keep close tabs on Wukong.

Nezha had to attend a private conference today, and so decided to leave Sun Wukong in the Demon Bull Family's care. Eventually, Red Son brought up the fight with the LBD which eventually led to the current topic of conversation.

SWK: Well, I mean, there are worse plans I could've had than kamikaze-ing Lady Bone Demon.

DBK: I SINCERELY DOUBT THAT!!!!!!!

PIF: Honestly, Wukong, do you really have a death wish or something?

SWK: Why do you think Nezha left me here with you guys?

SWK: *realizes what he just said*

Nezha hadn't explained to Princess Iron Fan exactly why he thought that Wukong needed to be babysat watched over, only that he had a good reason for requesting this of her and her family. Iron Fan had known Nezha for a long time, and knew whatever reasoning it was, it was sound. But this? This was something she had never fathomed could come to be, let alone is.

RS: Oooooh, so that's why Nezha had you stay with us. You're on suicide watch!

DBK & PIF: RED SON, MIND YOURSELF!!!!!

RS: Well he is!

SWK: It's okay. We might as well call it as it is.

SWK: It didn't exactly start out as a suicide watch, but I think Nezha might have gotten a little paranoid since then, so it's basically suicide watch at this point.

SWK: I'm not entirely ashamed of it, really. I think it's very sweet of Nezha to be looking out for me like this. No one has had my back in such a long time, I kinda forgot what it felt like to have someone who genuinely cares about me.

RS: But we care about you. Don't we father?

DBK: Indeed. You would do well to remember that little brother.

SWK: Wait, you guys aren't just doing this as a favor to Nezha? I thought you guys were still mad at me for, you know, the whole mountain thing?

DBK: Of course not! That's water under the bridge at this point! I'm not mad at you for that, and yes I still mourn the time that was lost, but ultimately you are my brother. Nothing will ever change that.

RS: If you don't mind my asking, I would like to hear your side of the story, uncle. I have heard the tale of my father's imprisonment several times from both of my parents, but I would like to know how things went from your perspective.

SWK: Really?

RS: Indeed.

PIF: I admit, I am quite curious as well.

RS: What about you father?

DBK: I believe I would like to know as well.

SWK: Alright, you asked for it.

Sun Wukong recollected the tale of the Demon Bull King's imprisonment, but the way he told it, it was hardly about the act of imprisoning his brother, but rather the events that came before and after the matter.

~~~

Wukong had been at his husband's side as his beloved was about to succumb to a terrible illness that had plagued him for a while. To their misfortune, the Jade Emperor himself instructed Sun Wukong to kill, not imprison, the Demon Bull King. He said that if Wukong didn't comply, they would send someone else after DBK, and possibly his wife and only son as well, depending upon whether said other person saw fit. Both spouses were enraged and horrified at the thought. Wukong's spouse then encouraged him to go to stop his brother, but he could hardly bring himself to do so.

Wukong didn't want to leave his husband's side, but the choice (or lack thereof) became clear.

He had to let his husband die alone.

It was then that Wukong heard his beloved spouse's last words to him:

"My love will be with you even after I'm gone. Now go. Save your brother. I love you so much."

And Wukong responded:

"I love you too, my precious snapdragon."

---

Sun Wukong later returned staffless and heartbroken and found his bed void of all life, but also void of a corpse as well.

~~~

RS: Wait, whatthefuck? Where did the corpse go?

SWK: THAT'S THE WEIRD PART!!! I DON'T KNOW!!!!

SWK: But I do have a theory....

~~~

Some species of monkey, including the ones on FFM have a funeral ritual that Wukong has been attempting to outlaw for centuries. They rip the corpse to shreds and essentially have a snowball fight with the remains. However, there were no remnants of any type of corpse on the mountain.

~~~

DBK: What is wrong with your people?

SWK: I don't know, apparently I'm king of the psychopaths!

SWK: Anyhow, that's my theory. I kind of hope I'm right about this because what else could have possibly happened?

PIF: I don't know and I don't want to know.

RS: I don't know what I was anticipating your side of the story would be but it certainly wasn't that!

~~~

Nezha arrived a few hours later to collect Sun Wukong and was asked to confirm the Jade Emperor portion of Wukong's story, to which he did.

Nezha: I hadn't known that Wukong's husband was on his deathbed at the time! That is unacceptable regardless of circumstance. I'm very sorry for your loss.

SWK: It's fine, it happened hundreds of years ago and it's not like he's around to do it again.

Nezha: True, true.

RS: DID HE MENTION THAT PART ABOUT

~~~

Nezha went to sleep with one eye open that night.

Masterpost

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest - Vol 17

Hello darlings!

It was another big week - 24 fics! I should really start sleeping at night instead of reading until 3 am.... oh well. Enjoy the fruits of my sleep disorder!

You can find the Spreadsheet in all it's organizational glory here and all of my previous recommendations here.

Recommendations below the pedro meme (created by @gasolinerainbowpuddles)

Ravish -a Joel series by @psychedelic-ink

I've read a few like... cam girl/chat service/sex work type AUs and I have to say this is one of my favorites. I really really love the little Dieter cameos. And a little birdie (the literal author) told me he may be making an appearance in a future installment??? I am so excited ugh. Joel is like... stunningly hot in this despite being the kind of guy that falls in love with a cam girl. Yummy yummy

Seven minutes in heaven (the bathroom) -a Frankie one shot by @tieronecrush

A fun twist on the bathroom quickie trope. Frankie is so filthy in this fic and it is fantastic. I really like the ending also. Made me giggle

A Savage Place - a Joel series by @gasolinerainbowpuddles

SUB JOEL MY BELOVED!!! This is one of those more realistic sub joels where he's confused as fuck about liking it, but he really clearly needs someone to take control for a little while. I really fucking love this so much. (there's pegging in part 2 @ my pegging enthusiasts <3 ) Reader is hot as hell, also. GOD I love this.

Whistle in the Dark - a Joel series by @gasolinerainbowpuddles

Romantic cucking <3 No but okay the like basic plot is that your husband is a piece of shit who cheats on you so you like forcibly cuck him with Joel and Joel has feelings and it's sooooo hot and so good and like... affirming? and sweet? And your husband deserves to have his dick cut off bc he does something real fucked up, but having to watch Joel Miller dick his wife down GOOD is a start.

He hurt me but it felt like true love - a Joel one shot by @iamasaddie

Mean sexy Joel is pissy cause he found your dildo and he's gonna make that your problem. It's so hot. Vaginal DP????? GOD DAMN. Someone said DP isn't depraved a while back (eyeroll). They should read this. This is beautifully depraved

Feral Woman - a Joel series by @gasolinerainbowpuddles

This series has me feeling so many emotions. Watching FW/reader/Julia/Bug heal over time and learn to trust again is so fucking good. Susan is the light of my motherfuckin life I love that woman with all my heart. This series is GORGEOUS

Endless Night - a Joel series by @gasolinerainbowpuddles

yes i basically worked my way through Puddles' masterlist can you fucking blame me look at this shit. Anyway. EnNi reader/OC is, on the surface, the sunshine to Joel's grump. But the thing I love about her is that she's got this underlying darkness that adds so much depth to the grumpy x sunshine trope. I'm also eating up the borderline enemies to lovers dynamic going on here. Joel is such a dick lmao. I'm so excited for the rest of this fic.

All the good girls go to hell - an Ezra one shot by @psychedelic-ink

DUBCON with PRIEST EZRA yesssssss. The Haunted Hoedown is the gift that keeps on giving. This fic is so fucking HOT. Ezra as a priest seems so wrong and so right at the same time. This is excellent. I'd gladly go to hell for this man UNF.

Three's a crowd - a Marcus P/Javi P one shot by @agentmarcuspike

Marcus motherfuckin cute ass baby Pike watches Javier Peña fuck you. Yeah. Cucking Marcus Pike. That's what this is. Marcus is also characterized perfectly. Like this is so fucking cute actually. And it's really hot. obviously.

Begging for you to take my hand - a Joel series by @jupiter-soups

This fic is driving me up the wall in the best way. Joel is a big dumb idiot man who is like... not emotionally intelligent enough to realize he's in the wrong while trying to do what he perceives to be the "right thing." Here's what I commented verbatim on part 2 "Joel 'You Deserve Better Than Me' Miller back on his bullshit. I love this so much. Joel is so sad and so stupid i kinda wanna hit him." So if you're like me and you like to watch Joel be a sad little idiot who is also super hot.... this is the one

Refuge - a Joel series by @cool-iguana

GAH THIS IS SO GOOD!!! This fic really situates you in reader's head. Like you feel disoriented and frustrated and scared when she does and you feel like a powerful badass when she does and it's SO good. Basically in this one your husband joel shows up with some kid who is def not your kid in Jackson after you've been there for a hot minute and it's a big wtf moment. There's some other shit going on that I don't wanna spoil but like... this is so good. I know I keep saying that but GOT DAMN

Exposed - a Javi P one shot by @atticrissfinch

big fat dub con warning on this one. I so rarely see Javi written as a creep and I really fucking enjoyed it. I would like to humbly request more creep!professor!javi p

The Apprentice - a Dave York one shot by @pedropascalsx

This has like mafia!au vibes while not really being that, but what I mean by that is that the big bad murder daddy who you thought you'd be scared of saves you from murder father (ur dad). I really liked the characterization of Dave in this and the smut was HOT

Stockings - a Joel one shot by @atticrissfinch

Daddy kink daddy kink daddy kink. This is inspired by a photo that literally looks like denim shirt joel is helping you put your stockings on. This fic manages to be adorable and aggressively hot at the same time. I am in love.

Slumber - a Joel one shot by @cool-iguana

I love a good somno fic. also this is literally their 2nd fic they ever wrote and it's so good?! TALENT. There was a thing in this that caught me off guard bc I fully did not read the warnings, but I was not at all mad about it... HOT

Yearling - a Joel series by @justagalwhowrites

Holy motherfuckin shit balls dude. I'm noticing that I'm reading a lot of Reader-Who-Is-Extremely-Traumatized fics this week and I refuse to examine why that is but also they all have handled the heavy content very very well. Anyway. Reader is super duper good with horses and Joel is so soft and Ellie is so Ellie and I love all of this. I really love the way Kit builds the world in her fics. Like the opening chapter and then the way Bambi's back story is built up and the spaces that she exists in, they're all so vivid and good and real to me. I'm so fucking in love with the way Kit includes these details like reader singing and playing music, joel's coat, the light on in the house when Bambi is gone. It feels like nothing is there just to be there, like it's all important and it has a significant impact on the story and man... (also if you're worried about starting a longfic that's not finished, it updates like twice a fuckin week. Fast writer lol).

The Cabin in the Woods- a Dave York one shot by @xdaddysprincessxx

Getting kidnapped by Dave York and held in his cabin in the woods. Dark dark dark fic and so fucking well written. Love this <3

Isn't She a Doll? - a Dave York one shot by @proxima-writes

You are Dave's perfect little housewife and that is definitely the only thing going on here. Nothing out of the ordinary at all. (just read it)

Who do you call? - a Joel one shot by @chloeangelic

Your hot neighbor Joel helps you get rid of a spider! How sweet of him. Oh and then he rails you on the couch. I really love the way they have a whole conversation while they're fucking about how long it's been since they've fucked anyone. Chloe just has this wonderful way of infusing humor into really really hot fics that I adore

Does your mother know? - a Joel one shot by @cupofjoel

Another bathroom quickie for the rec list and god DAMN this one is hot. Close Family Friend!Joel (god I love putting this man in situations). There's something about being forced to stay quiet that just makes everything hotter.

Cellmate's Nephew!Joel - a Joel series by @toxicanonymity

JoJo is actually the love of my life. His tattoos, his voice, his dick print.... sigh. Can't wait to get out prison so this man can rail me on every available surface between the prison and Mabel's house.

The Man That I Love - a Joel series by @lumoverheaven

Joel is an idiot who doesn't know what he has until he almost loses it. The first part is heartwrenching and sad and I love it. The second part is wonderful and makes me tear up a lil

I said I didn't feel nothing, baby, but I lied - a Veracruz one shot by @iamasaddie

Veracruz is so hot. I swear that man could punch me in the face and I'd suck his dick for it (that is not healthy oops). This lovely little drabble is literally just you getting your ass spanked so raw you won't be able to sit for a week and it's HOT AS HELL

Creep - a Joel one shot by @theywhowriteandknowthings

Joel Miller is your super hot creepy neighbor and he manages to get you to fuck him and that is definitely the only thing going on here. nothing fishy at all. nope. totally normal reader fucks her creepy neighbor fic. (just fucking trust me and read it ok?)

---------------------------------

Happy Reading!

[mrsjavierp]

Where you belong?

Chapter 8 - Fill the Void

Javier Peña x latin!f!reader

Summary: Running away from life as you always knew to start a new position as Head Chief on a DEA Office, far away, on Colombia. There, you'll face violence, as you never thought you could. There, you'll meet Javier Peña, your stubborn agent...

Warnings (to the whole fic): +18!, angst, smut, cheating, last relationships, drug dealing - Narcos Universe (not so accurate), bad spanish, english is my second language, use of Y/N and Y/LN. No physical description of the reader, only your clothes (sometimes). The POVs are shifting between reader (first person and Narrator - 3rd person)

(If I forgot anything, tell me, pls!)

Word Count: 4k

A/N: Thanks for your feedback, hope you enjoy this chapter! Hope to hear from you all soon! I'm also working on two stories (one shots) to our beloved Joel Miller and our corny cowboy Agent Whiskey

Tag: @creedslove | @pedrostories | @mjoee13 | @immyowndefender | @iamsherlocked-1998 | @pedroswife69 |

***

Narrator’s POV:

Arriving at the CNP headquarters, Steve, Javier and you get there almost at the same time.

The tension between you and Javier was noticeable. Steve knew better than asking either of you: he wanted to live to see his girls again… And to catch Escobar.

When you locked the door in your office, the tears started appearing. 

You lied to Javier about not remembering breakfast: you hoped he lied about it too. You actually couldn't recall talking about Ben.

Fuck, was a name you didn't think in a very long time… 

Especially after meeting Javi.  

Is Javi that full of himself to say that to me? What did he mean by that? What did I tell him? And most important: what he really knew about Ben? - You thought.

On the other side of the door, Javier’s mind was racing, trying not to act by impulse. But he decided to call a friend in NYC, who could tell him all he wanted about your history with your ex. He needed to understand why you were so worked up, why that bothered so badly.

However, he didn’t want Steve to suspect anything. Luckly, they got a tip about La Quica again, that he was buying a toilet... The same one that was on La Catedral and heading to the hills on San Isidro road.

When Steve went to speak to Jacoby, to fly Centra Spike over that location, Peña took the shot and called Joe:

“Hey, Joe!” - he greeted him.

“Took you long enough, Javi, you bastard!”

“Well, I tried to avoid long distance calls, you know I hate them.”

“Oh, so the rumors are true, you left your wife in Texas?”

“I did... Better for her and little Lucas, you know…” - he was looking over his shoulder, but no one seemed to be paying attention to him.

“So, how is Y/LN on the colombian field?”

“So far so good, man. She's a good cop…”

“She was one of the best here… But I’m betting my chips that it is not about her resume you called, you want the dirty, am I right?”

Javier laughed. 

“You fucking bastard, I knew it!”

“So, what you’ve got about her and her ex?” - Peña asked.

“Peña, that was a huge mess… He was already working here for a while and, months later, she arrived from the NYPD through the front door and found by herself a lead to a prostitution scheme… It was so big that it was a closed door OP, top secret stuff, it was only her, me, our boss and another couple of guys. The operation involved high-class prostitutes, working for high profile narcos. Ben heard the rumors about the OP and tried to sweet talk her to join it… But you know how she is with her work… Things do not mix at all.”

“Oh, I know…” - Javi sighed.

“Yep, so you know the deal... At first, it was just an evil comment here and there. I don’t know if she heard it, she trusted him, she was going to marry him. We were working our asses off, long and crazy hours. He took advantage and lied to her. He got sloppy and the rumors continued to grow... But I still don't know what she knew. Anyway, his luck didn’t last long: we were about to bust a brothel on the night that the narcos were there. Guess who was in one of those filthy beds?”

“No way…” - Javier closed his eyes, incapable of believing it.

“Yep. She found out on the job. Didn't help when she also discovered that he was trying to trade inside info with criminals.”

“Fuck, he was a dirty cop?”

“Yep. Luckily, she was too up-tight with all of her work. Not only was she as clean as a whistle, she got promoted to Colombia.”

“I can't believe it. Fuck...”

“Like a motherfucking movie, am I right?”

“Thanks for telling me. I can understand her behavior now…”

“She's one of the best cops I've ever got to work, Peña. She didn't deserve that.”

“I believe you. Well, thanks, man. Call if you need anything.”

Peña hung up the phone, if he was a mess before, now he was a wreck. The same questions were going through his mind again: How is he going to keep Lorraine away? How will he manage his boy's custody? How is he divorcing her and keep you in the dark, until the process is over?

A couple hours later, the tip to Centra Spike  worked: a conversation between another sicario, Velasco, and his lover is recorded.

You, Steve, Javier, Centra Spike, Mili Group and CIA reunited to see area’s maps:

"Well, we can discard the smaller ones... Not Escobar's style." - Steve pointed out.

"Which one of these has at least 2 roads of access?" - you ask.

"This one, Y/LN." - Jones, from the CIA, responded.

"This is your winner, niños." - you draw a circle, indicating it.

"Y/LN, what about Pinzón? We're gonna need men, equipment, cars..." - Javier commented.

"Leave Pinzón to me, Peña." - you responded.

You went back to his office, but he refused.

"¡Cabrón!" - you thought.

You went back to yours, but in the way, Steve talked to you:

"Jefe, any luck?"

"Not yet... But let me handle it. He doesn't know who he's dealing with." - the boys looked at each other, curious.

You called Crosby, Crosby called Gaviria and… Let's wrap it up: about 15 minutes later, you all were preparing to bust Escobar.

All the efforts for nothing, unfortunately: Escobar escaped through your fingers, again.

Escobar, however, made a career fooling and killing police officers, what he thought was going to a truce about to happen turned into a fuse to another battle, which made him even more dangerous.

Days later, you all were right as the skies were blue: another attack came. 

Escobar's sicarios killed a bunch of Pinzón's men all around Medellín… 

Pinzón chose to resign - it was the last drop to his sanity. He wanted personal peace more than to defend his country… How would someone judge him? 

Escobar killed more than four hundred cops a year - although it was a risk, it had no garanties on being alive and no one could fulfill any expectations to actually get it done.

*

Days passed by and President Gaviria decided to bring Coronel Carrillo back from Spain, as soon as he could.

The first thing Carrillo did was talk to you, since Peña and Steve weren't alone anymore:

“So, Y/LN… You're the boss now. I hope that we can work together at the same pace.” - Carrillo smiled at you.

“Well, I can't say anything about style, but we sure make a hell of a team. I'm saying the same thing as I said to Peña and Murphy: I'm also a field agent… Don't let the high hills fool you.”

He smirked.

“Vamos, Y/LN. I've got to say hi to an old friend…”

****

Carrillo decided to put up a show: tell in grand style about who's back in town. The actual goal was putting Escobar's partners on the map, by transmission. So Carrillo would stick his nose out and so would Escobar.

He lets you, Javier and Steve mapping Escobar's spies.

About a couple hours later, he came back and you and your inside team did the best you all could to track them all.

“We captured six radio transmissions.” - Jacoby informed. - “But we haven't pinpointed the exact location.” 

“So our best bet is to corner each of these buildings. This time, we hit the ground.” - you said.

Carrillo ordered his soldier, Trujillo, to send 6 unmarked cars with 4 men each, to observe the buildings, with 20 minute-intervals to avoid attention.

After that, he called Peña to join him.

“Be careful out there.” - you warn them.

Minutes later, when you and Steve are alone, you ask:

“Steve, is he always like that? Taking Peña up and down?”

“Sometimes, Jefe… He probably just wants an update to what happened from someone he trusts… He doesn't know you yet, it's his way.“ - Steve told me.

You'd show Carrillo who you really were: a woman younger than all three (Steve, Peña and himself) whose balls were bigger. 

***

Peña, Trujillo, Carrillo and other officers captured 6 of the boys who were working for Escobar. 

They took them to a hidden alley, on Bairro Escobar.

They are on their knees, scared. Well, 5 of them, at least.

“Do you know who I am?” - Carrillo started. - “My name is Coronel Horacio Carrillo. Last week, 30 police officers were murdered.”

“Those pigs probably deserved it.” - one of them said.

“Shut up, kid.” - Javier murmured.

“Many of them were my friends. A person perched on rooftops guiding murders with radios are assassins themselves… I hope after this encounter you'll reconsider working with someone who thinks he's above the law.”

Although Javier knew Carrillo was right, something felt off. Wrong.

At the same time, Carrillo cocked his pistol.

“What?” - another boy provoked. He was no more than fifteen, brown skin. - “Am I supposed to shit my pants in fear?”

Javier's stomach ached badly. It's been a while since he was afraid of something.

“No.” - Carrillo responded, shaking his head. He pointed the gun and shot, with no hesitation.

His body just fell on the floor, like it was nothing.

“Am I making myself clear? I want you to tell your friends that this is what happens when you work for Pablo Escobar!” - he shouted.

Carrillo analyzed the boys and chose one: the youngest, probably no more than 7 years old. The boy was crying, in silence.

He bent down, looked deeply in his eyes and handed him a bullet.

“Take it.” - the little boy obeyed. - “Tell them this is for Pablo.”

Carrillo stood up again, as if nothing happened.

“Remember what you saw… And know what will happen to you if I see you on a rooftop. You can leave. Now!” 

The five boys ran as if their lives depended on it.

Javier couldn't move. He felt like throwing up. He looked at Carrillo, as if he asked something. 

Carrillo’s expression was cold and distant.

They all drove back to CNP in silence.

When they arrived back, Steve met Javi on his way out.

“Javi, where are the fucking spotters?” - Steve asked, anxious.

“Carrillo went a different way… He, uh… He cut them loose.” - Javier responded, screeching his head, tense. How the hell is he going to tell what happened?

“Oh, we're letting people go, now? I bet Y/LN will be pissed AF…”

Javi rolled his eyes and, lighting up a cigarette, said:

“Yeah, Murphy, we're letting people go.”

“And what does that mean?”

“Don’t worry about it, man.” - Javier opened the door of his truck. He needed to leave as fast as he could. He needed a hug. He needed to feel human again.

“Hey, fucking talk to me!” - Steve demanded, interrupting the friend.

“Let go my fucking arm.” 

“What the fuck happened?!” - Steve continued to bother Javier.

Javier sighted and responded:

“Carrillo put a gun to the kid's head and pulled the trigger… To make a fucking point.”

Steve swallowed hard. 

“We good now?” - Javier mocked, entered his car and headed to the apartment complex where you all lived.

***

About late at night, you hear fervorous knocks at your door.

You were awake, since you just got home.

You pick up your gun and open the door, without noticing that you were only wearing a thin long gray dress, showing your curves.

It was Javier, looking like shit with a bottle of whiskey and a cigar in hand.

“Let me in, please, cariño.” - his brown eyes were almost black. Sad and big.

You put down the gun and let him in.

“Peña, you look like shit… What happened?” - you asked, as you both sat down on your couch and he served whiskey to both of you and put the cigar in the astray.

“Salut, cariño.” - he raised his glass.

You raised as well, drank it up and put away the glass.

“Damn, Peña. That's good stuff… You didn't answer me. What happened?” - you uttered. You knew something bad had happened. The cigar, the good whiskey, his painful expression…

“Cariño, I… I don't know how to say it.” 

“Start from the beginning, Javi… I'm right here.” - you suggested, softly.

You were genuinely concerned for him.

He kissed your lips, softly, by surprise. 

You stop after a few minutes, reaching out for air. Your apartment felt like a thousand degrees. Your body was sweating, the adrenaline was running through your veins. But, again, you’d deny even from yourself.

“Javi…” - he already knew what you're going to say and he doesn't want to hear it again. 

“Cariño, please don't. Not now. I need to forget about today's route.”

“Okay, baby boy.” - you sat on his lap and kissed him deeply. He melted under your lips, his hands touching your body, hungry.

You only needed an excuse to be with him again. 

Just one more night… - you thought.

If you were wearing pants, they'd be on fire.

“Cariño, just a heads up…” - he started.

You looked at him, confused, waiting for the rest.

“I won’t be gentle. Right now, I can't. I'm really not capable… Are you okay with it?”

You continued on his lap, but now, you put your knees on each side of his body and he involved his arms around you. Even wearing clothes, the electricity was passing through both of you.

“Show me your worst, Peña… I dare you.” - you whisper.

He smiled, but his eyes darkened with lust.

Javier literally ripped your dress, revealing your skin.

“Hey! Are you fucking crazy, Javi?” - you yell at him. - “I’m gonna fucking…” - you didn't finish, as he slapped your cheek, not enough to hurt you, he never would, but enough to surprise you and make you shut up.

“You don't speak until you're spoken to, babygirl. You don't come until I say so. You won’t do anything without me saying. If you behave like a good girl, I may let you cum. If not, I'm gonna punish you. Understood?”

You shook your head positively, incapable of believing in what was happening.

He slapped your ass, bringing you back.

“Words, cariño.”

“Yes, I understood it.” - you responded, in a low voice.

Who was that man on Javier's body and where he was the first night we were fucked? - you thought. 

“Good girl, cariño…” - he touched your body, started at your neck and went down to your waist. - “Now, how do I begin? I've got so many options, so many possibilities… I know we only had sex one time, one night, but I feel like I know your body really well, cariño.”

You looked at him, anxious, waiting.

He picked you up in his arms and took you to your bed.

“Now, we're ruining your bed, cariño.”

He ripped your panties and, with no warning, kissed your mound. You relaxed as he kissed slowly for a bit. 

He got up, leaving you clenching over nothing.

He began to take off his suit and tie, your eyes hungry for him, mouth watering.

“What do you want, cariño?” - he asked, eyes locked up with yours.

“Can I help you undress, Javi?”

“Such a polite girl… Yeah, you can.”

You took off his tie, letting it rest on the bed. Helped him with the buttons on his shirt, holding back the urge to rip them as he did with your dress.

He took off his shoes and socks and you unbuckled his belt, letting it side with the tie… You had a dirty idea, but it would have to wait a bit.

At last, his pants went down with his boxers.

He was deciding on what to do, but you couldn't wait. Your hand touched his lower belly, aiming for his dick. 

“Oh, cariño, you want to use your mouth, now? Wanna please me?”

“Yes, Javi.”

“Beg for it.” - he said in that condescending tone you hated.

“Javi, please, let me suck your dick.” - you coo.

He caressed your cheek with one hand and the other held his shaft.

“I don't think you want it enough, cariño.” - and he slowly started going up and down his length. He had a stupid cocky smile on his face.

“You know I can be better than your hand, Javi… Please, let me touch you, I'm begging you…” - your voice barely was a whisper into your room.

“Go ahead, cariño… But don't be greedy. I don't wanna come right now.”

Your lips wrapped around his tip, while he held your head. Your tongue and lips worked up and down, while one of your hands cupped his balls.

“Fuck, cariño… I knew you were missing me, but didn't know you were so hungry for my cock.”

He grabbed your hair, setting the rhythm, until you couldn't stand only worth your knees on the bed, needing to claw at his tights, and your nose almost touching his pelvis. 

He was fucking your throat and you were so wet.

His mouth was making obscene sounds, saying how good you're doing, how badly he missed you and your beautiful lips.

He slowed down the rhythm, until he stopped, taking it off your mouth. His dick was aching for more, but he wanted to come inside of you.

“You did good, cariño. Can you continue to be a good girl for me?”

“Yeah, Javi.” - you responded. Your legs were trembling, your pussy throbbing for attention.

“Lay down and open your legs for me… Yes, just like that. Tell me, where did you leave your vibrator?”

“In the bathroom, the second drawer.”

“Don't move.”

He picked it up and examined it, curious about the pink wand in his hand.

“So, you've been touching yourself in the bathroom? Door closed? Biting your lips or a towel to not make any noise?”

You don't respond to it, you’re just running away from his glaze. 

He slapped your ass again.

“Look at me while I talk to you.” - he demanded. - “Answer me!”

“Y-y-yeah, Javi. I was doing it in the bathroom, biting a towel.” - you murmured.

“Now, you're gonna show me what you've been denying from me to hear, such as in person as through these walls… But don't come. Not until I say so.” - and handed you the vibrator.

“But Javi, I can't control myself when I use it…”

He smiled, the same sly smile you knew and hated.

“That's not my problem. You come when I say it.” - he was being ruthless towards you.

With your right hand shaking, you started to use your wand on the softest mode, as you were so aroused since it all started.

Your room was filled with vibration sounds and your moans. Your eyes looking at his figure, wishing he’d do something to you instead. 

You were also a hundred percent sure Javier was punishing you somehow. He wanted to prove himself again.

Javier, on the other hand, was admiring you. The way your pupils were dilated, your body was shaking, your smooth skin chilling, your beautiful pussy soaking wet… If he could, he'd take a picture just to eternalize that moment.

“O-o-oh fuck, Javi… I can't take it anymore… I'm so close, please, let me come!” - you beg.

He smirked at you.

“Oh, cariño, you're close?” - he leaned towards you, as if he was going to enter at your pussy. It only made it worse and closer, as you could almost feel his scent and his warm skin.

“Holyfuck, Javi, please! Please let me!” - you beg, desperately.

He grabbed his belt, tied your wrists together, holding your vibrator in your clitoris. After, he shoved his dick inside of you.

“Go ahead, cariño. Come for me and on me.” - he ordered.

You thank God he said that. You squealed his name high, releasing all of your juices onto him.

You were positively sure you woke up your neighbors.

“Oh, fuck! So good for me, cariño.” - Javier praised you.

He continued without any pity towards you, pounding hard inside you. 

Not only you’re embarrassingly wet, you were so overstimulated that the orgasm was knocking at your pussy again, so fast

“I love when you yell my name, cariño!” - he said, full of bliss.

“Javier, for god's sake!” - you yell again.

“¡Mierda! Cariño, are you close again?” - he asked with a devilish tone. - “What a delicious greedy pussy, missing me so much… Oh, fuck!”

Tears began to go down your face. It was impossible to hold anything more and, without his permission, you came again, your body shaking vigorously.

“Holy fuck, Y/N!” - It was his time to yell your name as loud as he could. - “I can... I can feel... You're so fucking tight, you're gonna rip my dick off!"

He untied you and turned off your wand. It relieved you for a bit, but he laid on top of you and chased his own orgasm. 

After he came, you both lay next to each other, gasping for air, eyes locked up to each other.

“I missed you so much, Javi…” - you reveal.

He smiled, happy. His hand went to your cheek, fondling.

“Yo también te extrañe, cariño. You have no idea…” (I missed you too.)

“I think I do, Javi… Te extrañe todos los malditos días desde la primera noche.” (I missed you all those damn days, since the first night.)

“Gracias a Díos, cariño. I thought I was alone in this mess.” (Thanks God.)

You laughed together.

“You can't pretend that you don't want to be with me anymore, cariño. I'm serious.” - he declared.

You sighed.

“I know, Javi… But we also know it's not that simple… We work together, I'm your boss, Escobar is on the run…”

“We can take it slow, we don't have to do anything you don't feel like it. But don't push me away again.” - Javier begged you.

“I really don't know how to, Javi. I don't know how to. I haven't dated since…” - you didn't finish.

His eyes were soft and warm, like cocoa on a winter night. Your heart felt like an ice cube on the sun, again. 

“Since your ex, Ben?” - he asked.

“Yep.” - you responded, popping the “p”. - “‘It’s not gonna be easy for you, so I’d like to warn you: if you have anything to tell me, tell me as soon as possible. I’m not gonna demand you to do it now, but think if you have anything to tell me, and if you do, you can.”

“First, we need to get to know each other. Build trust and I’m not talking about the field. Let’s get to know each other, talk, laugh, have sex, grab a bite. We’re neighbors, we don’t even need to leave our apartments if you don’t want to.”

“No one can know about us, Javier Jesus Peña. Not even Murphy.”

“Don’t worry about it, cariño.” - he pecked your lips softly.

“And please, don’t sleep with anyone else and it includes your informants.” - you rolled your eyes. - “I know, it’s stupid since we’re not in a relationship, but if you want to do it, please, just end this… this thing we’re about to begin. I’m not saying that again.”

“Cariño, for God’s sake!” - Javier laughed, his hand left your face to your waist. - “No one ever made me feel this way.” - you laughed. - “I’m serious, hermosa. Don’t worry about it.”

You breathe out heavily.

“Well, let’s see how it goes.” - you say, still not allowing your heart to sink further. - “We need a shower, Javi. Care to join me?”

He smiled and you both entered your bathroom... But Javier's mind didn't care for sleeping. He still needed to punish you for coming without his permission, while you were filling the bathtub, distracted.

"Of course, cariño... Besides, you haven't exactly been a good girl for me for a few days. Don't think I'll let you escape that easily."

Your eyes went to his naked figure, surprised.

"Oh, I thought I was off the hook..."

Next

[mylittleredgirl]

previously on mylittleredgirl: [four seasons of m*a*s*h] [six weeks of screaming about margaret houlihan]

i have now finished season five disc one and a bullet point recap is due! [yeah there's more screaming in it]

bug out was a fucking DELIGHT

god i was so worried though when klinger had to trade all his dresses i was wailing internally. what if he just wears fatigues forever!?!??? but it's all okay!!!! that tassel mod dress he has on in "the abduction of margaret houlihan" healed me ten times over. his outfits have been 🔥 this season.

such a mix of really dumb slapstick comedy and "oh god the war is Right Here" drama and little character sweetness... love it.

and the family reunion happiness at the end!!!! god bless. i left my body for like thirty-six hours.

i really really love the tone they're striking with frank this season. they've walked back the cartoon villainy of late season four, so he's once again a relatively harmless clown. i breathed a huge sigh of relief. he's soooo much more fun this way.

margaret's engagement: bonkers. delightful. she's unbearable. there is so much wrong with her. i want to study her in a jar. i will never shut up again.

with this put together with some bits later in the disc (including that cut scene crayon joke lmao), did she somehow manage to trade DOWN from frank? is that even possible??? it's either that or this new dude is actually just The Exact Same Guy, but now she'll be the fool wife at home instead of the beloved mistress.

i mean personally if i were louise burns i'd be very happy for my dumbass husband to fuck around on the other side of the world for as long as possible while i enjoy the $35,000 house and two cars without him, but for someone like margaret who is far more interested in being wined and dined than running a household, this... may not be the field promotion she thinks it is.

hawkeye rising to frank's defense and him and b.j. enabling frank's little takedown of margaret at the end felt very real. sure, in the grand scheme of things, margaret is Annoying and frank tried to have hawkeye executed last season, but bros before hos.

okay how FUNNY would it be though if the "little redheaded nurse" frank planned to seduce was baker-from-the-nurses, because she would have scratched frank's eyes out for trying and not felt bad about it

and actually, that's a plausible backstory for the extra bad blood between her and margaret, too??? oh yeah. that definitely happened.

i actively missed frank/margaret as the disc went along though. maybe the show had stretched the tension of that relationship as tight as it could go, and it's nice that they get to do new things... but they're so funny and awful together and i miss them sharing scenes!!!

i really assumed - like frank did lol - that they would continue to rabbit around together, only now she would also get to string him along with the jealousy game, but...... well, i'm glad it's still hanging out in the background of the narrative, anyway. i live in hope that they will slip and fuck and it will be soooo messy.

FUCK is it possible i shipped that for real???? god. i don't know if my family name can bear this dishonor.

out of sight, out of mind...

...has taught us the very important lesson that hawkeye is 9000x more annoying without something to do (annoying to everyone else i mean!! not to me. i will happily watch him annoy everyone.)

him asking b.j. to visit him a million times a day 🥺

i'm almost satisfied now by the "doctor-experiences-the-role-of-patient" theme that i didn't get in "hawkeye." i suppose hurt/comfort fic can take it from here.

however i'm totally satisfied by how sweet it was to see everyone taking care of him!! and how much they love him!!

lt. radar o'reilly... devastating. i mean funny and delightful but it's mean!! so glad that boy is back in stripes. however they could have at least promoted him a little for his trouble. sergeant o'reilly???

i have already said more about the nurses (post here) than ever needed to be said. and yet. i'm quite sure i could say more if pressed

the abduction of margaret houlihan

........ will i never be free of colonel flagg episodes 😞

i love the continuing evidence that she has invested time in learning korean, and i really really really love the slow expansion of our perspective to include like oh yeah. there's a village where people live full time and it's literally right here.

imagine if after the war she becomes an ob nurse...

on the one hand, how do they not make frank do gun handling training. on the other hand they probably don't because it always ends with stitches and an accident report.

i sometimes wonder if mash was like jury duty for asian actors in the 70s. you probably won't get to say anything but they call you up and you just have to go.

dear sigmund!!!!!! this is another episode where people were staring at me through the window so i'll comment a little more:

the fandom's favorite guy sidney freedman deserves that crown. what a weirdo. talk about a busman's holiday for a psychiatrist to come to the 4077 for a vacation and psychoanalyze everyone. but for fun!

i really don't have a proper sense of the geography at play here because he really does like. just come by to play cards once a week. and drives through a war zone i guess to do it? he has probably sacked out in the swamp before when the air raid situation changes but this time he just... doesn't leave.

and aaaa!! margaret took her very special episode about How To Make Friends to heart!!!! she joined the poker game!!!

she had plenty of time to work on that lesson though because the jeremy bearimy time shenanigans are in full swing here at the 4077. we went from midsummer in 'the nurses' to a bitter cold march two episodes later.

i always kind of assumed the mash weather was loosely inspired by real human weather, but no, in fact the actors just have to randomly suffer in parkas or getting sprayed in the face to look sweaty in alternating weeks regardless of the surrounding conditions.

SUFFERING for their ART

also jfc b.j.!!!! dunking frank in cold water in freezing temperatures is a serious health and safety concern my dude!!!!

i'm afraid b.j. is still not beating the little brother allegations, he has just aged up from innocent baby to fucking gremlin

(i should confess that my little brother diagnosis is guided by the fact that in my complex family and housing history i only ever lived with "brothers" younger than me, and never older ones. but the innocent baby and prank gremlin stages are real.)

i made a note here of "margaret randomly drinking gin in the swamp now!!?!??" like the poker game was one thing, people could strong-arm her into that while she feigns protest, but ma'am WHO are you and what have you done with— and then the next note is "oh good she's still insane"

potter named his horse sophie <3 also he's collecting granddaughters, i think the count is up to 3 now. or baby sherry is experiencing a temporal anomaly of her own!

the letter radar wrote to the dead guy's parents and potter reading it... fucking ended me. please let harry morgan do serious bits more often, it's outstanding and far too rare.

it's not surprising that frank's wife changing (wearing pants! doing activities!) would stress him out, and not just because he's a dick. any of them would struggle with their families growing without them, because that means they can Never Go Home to the life they left!! (e.g. trapper losing it because his girls were getting older.) but it is kind of fascinating that he loves both his wife and margaret, and even said mid-fever that he wanted them to be friends, but he also wants them to be NOTHING alike.

all in all it's understandable that sidney would check in to the no boundaries motel to have his poker buddies shake it out of him, but he could also have taken his leave somewhere with indoor heat. so he's as crazy as the rest of them. <3

also they're not his patients he's just observing them like zoo animals so forget confidentiality he's absolutely gonna write a book about them someday.

mulcahy's war: i don't know why i have been misspelling his name with an 'e' the whole time because it was literally in the end credits of almost every episode for four seasons.

oh god he's so precious i don't talk about it enough. playing poker for orphans. feeling like he doesn't do enough while potter thinks he has the hardest job. that unrelenting positive regard for everyone. always with that little grin.

that little grin in FULL PLAY as he sneaks out of the house to go off to war when dad's not looking

radar should never be sent on a mission where people are bleeding when will they LEARN

corporal cupcake deserves every medal he gets!!!!

frank's foot fetish becoming his one true medical specialty is just. i don't know what to do with this. good for him??? do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life???

speaking of unrelenting positive regard, margaret's policy of nurses never talking back to the doctors in the operating room sure has taken a hit. i realize this is about frank being an intolerable ex, but i choose to believe that the detente between margaret and her nurses has turned the O.R. into a pvp zone. the next time hawkeye tries to seduce a nurse over an open body, he's gonna get wrecked and margaret's just going to shrug pretty and look the other way.

in conclusion: season five is soooo gooooooood!!!!! can't wait for disc two!

[vishnavishivaa]

Vaazhkaiyin Niram

As promised, @yehsahihai and I are back, with the entire fic now. It is kind of long, so have fun?

********

Arulmozhi Varman was in a quandry. 

He had been trying to get some time alone with Vanathi, and she had somehow, successfully avoided him at every single turn. Even his patience could end, it seemed like, for each time she avoided him, he felt another chip off the block he called his patience. Why was she avoiding him? He had not even teased her in a while…

Oh maybe that was it?

But… why would that make her avoid him? What had he done?

He knew the feelings he bore for her all too well. He also knew that he had been in denial far too long for her to not have noticed something amiss. What he did not expect was how far Vanathi was willing to go in her love for him.

It was mid-afternoon as Arulmozhi paced his akka’s rooms, with Samudra Kumari and akka watching him with a growing mixture of concern and amusement. 

I mean, I just don’t understand. Why is she doing this? What is she trying to do?”

“Thambi even I don’t know and I almost always know what is in her heart.”

“Illavarase, maybe the Kodumbalur Illavarasi has been in the sun too much. That is why she is acting like this.”

“Samudra Kumari, this is no time for humor” came his akka’s sharp rebuke, making Poonguzhali raise her hands in surrender. 

“Akka?” came the sweet voice of the maddening princess who had robbed him of all his sleep.

“Kanne? What is it?”

“Nothing akka. I couldn’t find you anywhere so I was wondering where you were.”

Kundavai suddenly had an idea, as she addressed Vanathi, asking her, “Kanne, just one question. If the one you love is in love with another, what would you do?”

Vanathi froze for a second before looking towards Arulmozhi who had not let his eyes wander away from her since she stepped in. 

“Why akka, then I would do my best to ensure he won over the one he loves”

Arulmozhi physically felt the need to sit down, as she turned to leave, worrying that he would faint after hearing that. Really he had to stop picking up his kanmani’s habits. Holding his head in his hands, he bemoaned, “Akka, why is my wife like this?”

“You’re not married to her yet thambi!”

“AKKA IN MY HEAD I AM ALREADY MARRIED TO HER!”

He sighed, remembering the amusement on Samudra Kumari’s face and the knowing look his elder sister had gotten. That just reminded him of another incident, engineered by his darling. 

Arulmozhi was excited, having seen his Vanathi walk towards him. 

“Ponniyin Selvare,” her sweet voice, which was like nectar to him, sounded in his ears, filling his being. 

“Kodumbalur Kula Vilakke,” he said, trying hard not to call her, my Kodumbalur Devadhai, instead. 

“Selvare, Poonkuzhali is looking for you. She is waiting by the boat at the banks of Ponni Thai,” she said softly, a tinge of sadness in her eyes, something that did not escape him. What was wrong with his Vanathi? He wanted to cup her cheeks and peer into her eyes, reading through them so that he could first understand, and then wipe away her sadness. He wanted to bring that luminosity he so loved seeing in her eyes. 

“Devi, are you okay?” he asked instead. Samudra Kumari could wait, Vanathi came first. She would understand- this was how she was with Amudhan.

“I am fine, Selvare, why do you ask?”

“It doesn’t seem so to me,” his eyes roved over her face, concerned.His hands itched to tilt her chin up, to look into her eyes and understand and solve all her problems.  He noted the tiredness in her eyes, and he ached at the sight of it. 

“No no Selvare, I am fine. But you must go, Poonkuzhali is waiting for you,” with a departing smile, she slipped away, and he blinked. 

Why was his beloved running away again?

Sighing, he made his way to the banks of Kaveri to meet Samudra Kumari. 

It had turned out that his kanmani had ensured that he and Samudra Kumari could be alone?

For what reason even, he had wondered then. Of course, she was his good friend… but she would much rather listen to Sendhan sing Thevarams, and he would prefer to be around Vanathi, even with his Akka present. 

“You?” they had both exclaimed upon seeing each other. 

“Illavarase what are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same, Samudra Kumari.”

“Illavarasi Vanathi.. She asked me if I would give her a ride in my boat.”

Arulmozhi frowned at that, trying to understand what his beloved had been thinking. 

“But that doesn’t make sense. She told me you were waiting for me? To talk to me?”

“Talk to you? No Illavarase, I never said anything of the sort.”

Arulmozhi groaned at that, as he sat down on the river banks, head throbbing as he thought of Vanathi’s behaviour in the past few days. His illavarasi had almost continuously avoided looking at him, preferring to engage in conversation with his akka or any other lady in the palace rather than talk to him. There was a pit of anxiety in his stomach as he tried to understand what had happened to the playful, bubbling Vanathi he knew. It was slowly driving him crazy, to be able to see her but never talk to her, to exist in the same sphere as her and still feel like she was miles away from him. Even when she did speak to him it was almost completely formal and clipped, like she was trying to do her best to avoid prolonging their conversations. He had been living with an almost constant dull ache in his heart these days and it was frustrating him to no end that he couldn’t unravel this mystery.

“Oh… oh!”

Poonkuzhali’s voice interrupted his thoughts. He looked at her, confused as to why she looked both exasperated and endeared at once. 

“Ilavarase, I think the Ilavarasi thinks you and I want to be together. It is clear she does not know of your overwhelming love for her.”

Arulmozhi let out another loud groan at that, tipping back fully to sprawl on the riverbanks, uncaring of the numerous small pebbles digging into his skin.

“Why is Vanathi like this? I’ve been trying so hard to express how I feel for her and yet she doesn’t understand. Every time she looks at me, her doe eyes are downcast and her honey like voice is subdued. What do I do to make her believe that I love her?”

“Perhaps Illavarase,” Poonguzhali began, in a matter-of-fact tone, “you could start by telling her all this instead of crying about it in front of Ponni thaaye?”

Since then, he had been trying to get her alone, but she still evaded him,and also continued her setting up attempts.

Arulmozhi was trying to get near Vanathi, wanting to stand near her for the poojai. He felt that her presence around him will keep him successful in gaining the blessings of Durgai Amma. But getting to her seemed to be getting more tiresome. 

Luckily, he had spotted Samudra Kumari near her, and had sent a signal to her requesting her aid, which his doe eyed damsel had misinterpreted,and had artfully pushed Poonkuzhali next to him, instead of standing next to him herself. 

How was he to confess if she would not listen? 

Maybe he should shout it out in front of everyone?

Hmm maybe that’s what he would do… but what if his love got embarrassed? He could not do that to her… Ishvara, he was really sounding like Vanathi now. Love really made people stupid, he thought, unclear whether he meant himself or his beloved.

Which was exactly how he had found himself in his akka’s chambers as she had watched the whole scene at the poojai happen and immediately demanded answers.

“Thambi, what is going on?”, akka had asked, ever straight to the point. “First Vanathi loves you, then you don’t love her, then you like Samudra Kumari, then she likes Sendhan, then you love Vanathi, and now Vanathi is trying to get you and Samudra Kumari together? What are you all doing????”

Poonguzhali, who had until then been silent, said, “Ilaya Piratti, we think the Kodumbalur Illavarasi has had a misunderstanding. She believes that Ponniyin Selvan and I love each other, though I am not sure why. But since then she has been trying to get us together.”

“I am aware”, came Kundavai’s response to which his head shot up.

“What? How?”

“Because thambi, she approached me before the poojai, asking to speak with me alone. And then she went exonerating about how good of a woman Samudra Kumari was, and how she would make a worthy queen for you and how I should accept her and give you two my blessings. I have to admit, she almost convinced me.”

“I… WHAT?”

“Thambi, calm down. I was not convinced fully, because her love for you was visible, and so is yours for her.”

“Akka,” he said, burying his face in his hands. “What do I do?”

“Well, you have to tell her, thambi.”

“How do I do that when your best friend keeps avoiding me?”

Poonkuzhali sighed, standing up.

“Leave it to me.”

“Somehow that just made it worse”, he muttered under his breath as he watched her leave.

Poonkhuzhali really didn’t understand these royals at times. When it was so clear to everyone with eyes that the prince had eyes only for the kodumbalur Illavarasi, why was she the only one who couldn’t see it? She knew that her brief infatuation with him had been clear to many, but that was all it was; an infatuation that had worn off when she realsied her love for Sendhan. But this princess, had been steadfast in trying to push her and the prince together. How can one love so selflessly, she wondered. The princess was willing to sacrifice her love for Ponniyin Selvan because she thought it would make him happy. Those two were really made for each other, she thought. 

She walked down the palace halls, trying to find the princes until she finally spotted her in the garden, sitting on a bench as she stared off into the distance. Taking a deep breath, khuzhali approached her. 

“Illavarasi”, she said bowing to her, as the princess seemed to snap out of her reverie.

“Samudra Kumari! What brings you here?” 

“Devi, I came to find you specifically,” said Poonkuzhali. “I wanted to ask for your thoughts, as Ilaya Piratti told me that you are fantastic at organizing any event.” 

“It’s all Akka’s teaching, Kumari,” Vanathi smiled. “What can I help you with?” 

Truly, thought Poonkhuzhali, she was the most gracious person she had ever met, apart from Ponniyin selvan. It just strengthened her resolve to bring them together. 

“My engagement ceremony, Ilavarasi,” Poonkuzhali said, feeling bad when Vanathi’s face shrunk and eyebrows frowned. 

“Of course, how can I help?” 

Poonkuzhali gave Vanathi details, requesting her help for organizing it, and the Princess did not disappoint. She helped Poonkuzhali organize it in a matter of half an hour. 

“Is there anything else I can help with, Kumari?” Vanathi asked softly. 

“No, thank you Devi. Sendhan and I are very grateful to you.” 

“Sendhan? You are getting engaged to Sendhan!?”

Poonkhuzhali bit her lips to keep from smiling as she said “Of course devi. Did Illavarase not tell you? I am going to marry Sendhan”

Vanathi felt as though the ground had been pulled out from under her feet, as she stared at Samudra Kumari trying to comprehend her words. She was going to marry Sendhan, which mean she was not in love with Ponniyin Selvan. Oh Ishvara, what had she done? 

She had evoked the anger of her Prince by doing such, by setting him up with a woman whose heart was another’s? How will she face him? Maybe she should just avoid him? 

Yes, that’s what she will do. She will avoid him. 

Standing up abruptly she said, “I-I should go meet akka, samudra kumari. Excuse me” Saying so she ran off, determined to avoid the prince at all costs.

*****

How had Samudra Kumari’s confession not helped? 

Vanathi was still avoiding him, extremely skillfully, which did impress him, as much as it exasperated him. He had tried to catch hold of her many times over the past few days but each time she had managed to excuse herself, slipping away to either be by his akka’s side or by his patti’s side or his amma’s side. It had gotten to the point where he was seriously considering if he could somehow climb into Vanathi’s chambers during the night to talk to her. He dismissed the possibility almost immediately knowing that if someone found out both of them would be in deep trouble with his family member, him more than her. 

Should he try and kidnap her instead? Hmm.. what if he kidnapped her after informing his Akka that he was kidnapping her? No that was ridiculous. Plus his akka would never let him hear the end of it. Maybe he could ask Vanthiyathevan………… No, no even worse. The Vanar Kula warrior would immediately go to tell his akka and then he would have to deal with being ribbed by both of them. Terrible idea. He could ask Samudra Kumari to talk to her, but given their last interaction with each other, he had a feeling Vanathi would just flee upon seeing her. 

He sat down as he massaged his temples trying to think, as he looked out into the palace courtyard….

Right at Vanathi who sat with his Akka, chattering away like she had not nearly driven him to insanity with her actions. 

He watched her for a second, blinked, and made a decision. Like the tiger he was, he rushed towards them, smirking mildly when he saw Vanathi’s eyes widen. 

“Akka!” 

“Thambi?” Kundavai had a knowing smirk on her face, and had mildly angled herself to ensure Vanathi couldn’t get away that easily. 

“I am sorry to do this to you, but I have to talk to my wife!” he scooped her into his arms, bridal style, and raced across the courtyard, as fast as lightning. 

Vanathi shrieked as she was lifted by him, feeling mortified as he carried her through the palace, burying her head in his chest, praying that no one saw them.   

Arulmozhi didn’t stop until they had reached his chambers, uncaring that anyone could have seen them being so brazen. It would only speed up their marriage after all. He set her down gently, before turning to lock the door and stared at her, his illavarasi who now seemed to praying to the earth to swallow her up. Biting away a grin he asked, “So, Kodumbalur Illavarasi, can we finally talk?”

“Talk? About what, Ponniyin Selvan?”

“You know what about, Devi,” he said softly, taking a step closer.

“No, no, I do not,” she gulped, still staring at the Earth, making him smile softly as he took another step forward. 

“Yes you do. Why have you been avoiding me?” he had crossed a personal boundary, but considering how she had been clutching him when he had held her, he knew she would tell him to move if she wanted that.

“I… I just wanted to give you space with your loved one, or so I thought…”

“Then you should have been around me!”

Vanathi’s eyes snapped up at those words as she tried to search his face for any traces of a joke, or him being another one of her daydreams. But he was right there, evidenced by the fact that he had just carried her throught the palace. 

“Illavarase, this is all highly inappropriate, we shouldn’t be………..” She found herself robbed of all speech as he took another step closer to her. Oh lord, any closer and she was sure he would almost hear the tandavam her heart was doing in her chest. 

She backed away slowly from him, hand reaching blindly for the door behind her hoping to find it’s bolt, but the prince was faster, moving closer to her so she had no option but to startle away from the door. 

“You cannot possibly hope to avoid me forever Vanthi”, he chided her though his voice held no sternness. 

“Illavarase, one only avoids those whom they feel scared of”, came her reply, eliciting a small smile from him.

“And is that why you have been avoiding me?” came the question, much softer than before.

Oh god, they were now circling around a table, each waiting for the other’s next move. Vanathi had heard tales of how the eyes of tigers were often hypnotic, but now standing in front of her illavarase she believed them, for there was no other reason that the world fell away as she looked at him.

Swallowing with difficulty, she replied, “Ayya how can I be scared of you? I was just….”

“Just?” Was he teasing her? Vanathi was suddenly beginning to doubt if all her assumptions about him having no affection for her were false. 

“I had other things to be doing, and I am sure even you did. I did not want to bother you.” 

Arulmozhi stilled at that, before throwing back his head to laugh, loudly until he almost felt tears of mirth gathering in his eyes. He was sure, that his beloved probably thought him mad at that moment but he couldn’t bring himself to stop. 

“Ponniyin Selvare, are you all right?”

Shoulders still shaking, he gasped out, “Vanathi, anbe, has anyone told you that you are a terrible liar?”

Vanathi felt the world cease all movement for a moment as she heard the term “anbe” slip out of his mouth, so effortlessly, so casually, as if it was not the first time he had ever called her that, as if he had been wanting to say it to her for a while. 

“A-anbe?” She stuttered out, cursing the blush that had formed on her cheeks, not realizing how delighted he was to see it. 

“Anbe, Kaadhale, Kanmani, Arasi, Iniyavale, every single term of love is for you, Vanathi,” his voice had turned intimate, his eyes resting on hers, not moving away from her gaze, allowing her to capture his emotions in full force. 

Vanathi suddenly felt faint, as it hit her that she had been wrong, so very wrong. She had been blind to every gaze he had directed at her, every word he had said she had been deaf to, even now she had been the one avoiding him while had been searching for her. She sat down heavily on a chair as she felt herself beginning to lose consciousness, only to be jolted out of it as she felt two very strong, callused hands on her shoulders. 

“Vanathi? Vanathi? Look at me, look at me. Are you ok?” 

She nodded weakly as she focused on his face, now scrunched into an expression of worry, as he looked her up and down to assess her. 

Arulmozhi felt an almost blind panic hit him as he saw Vanathi collapsing onto the chair in front of her, and he reached forward instinctively to hold her. 

“Kaadhale?”

“Vanathi?”, he tried as she seemed not to hear him, causing him to place his hands on her shoulders to ground her. It seemed to work as she focused on him, causing a flood of relief through his system. Making sure she was fine, he turned to fetch her a glass of water, handing it to her, as he noted how much her hands seemed to be shaking. 

“Wait, let me”, he said as he slowly brought the glass to her lips, watching as some of the water spilled down her chin. Making sure she was fine, he leaned down to wipe away the excess water on her face even as he felt his heart pick up pace with her gaze on him. 

Vanathi for her part was doing her best not to shiver at his close proximity, unable to look away from him for even a second as he fussed over her, suffusing her being with warmth. 

Seeming satisfied that there was no immediate threat of her fainting, he moved to cup her face with one hand as his thumb ran lightly over her face. Vanathi froze as she felt his touch so intimately, resisting the urge to simply melt into his arms. 

“You scared me kaadhale.”

“N-Natha,” she mumbled, blinking and blushing when she says that. “I am s-sorry…”

“Don’t be, not for calling me Natha, Swamini,” he whispered. When she flashed wide eyes at him, he cupped her cheek very gently, whispering, “Yes, you are my Swamini, Devi.” 

She looked at him deeply, with luminous eyes, which suddenly filled with tears. 

“You were trying to talk to me.. and I just, I hurt you,” she wept, falling into his arms. 

Arulmozhi immediately pulled her close to him, trying to calm her as he assured her that she had not done any harm to him.

“Shhhhhh anbe. Do not weep like this. You have never hurt me, ever. How can I be hurt by you, hmm?”

She still did not stop crying, every tear that fell feeling like a knife to his heart.  Gently detangling himself from her he knelt down fully in front of her, as he took her hand in his, ignoring the slight gasp she let out. 

“Ponniyin Selvare, what are you-”

“Vanathi, my uyirin uyir, my kanmani, you can never hurt me. You are not just in my heart but also my soul. I wish I could say my heart was mine but the truth is it has become yours long ago. You are in every breath I take and every one of my senses. I have been wanting to say this for far too long now, but there was always something preventing me. And today, I am kneeling before you to tell you I love you. Wholly, truly, irrevocably I love you.”

Vanathi gasped, her hands going to his neck to cup his jaw. 

“Once more, please?” She pleaded. 

“I love you, wholly, truly, irrevocably,” he whispered, tender smile on his face. 

“Swami,” she whispered softly, leaning to tip her forehead to his. “Swami, Swami, I lost my heart to you when we first met at the banks of Ponni Thai. And I only kept losing it over and over to you, every second of every day. I have dreamt so much of you telling me you loved me, that I couldn’t even process it at first. Oh Swami, I can’t express how I love you, but I do. So so so much. To see a smile on your face, I would even sacrifice my life.” 

Arulmozhi vehemently shook his head, bringing one finger over her lips. “Never, ever say that again Vanathi. My life is in you. I cannot survive without you.”

Vanathi laughed as she finally realized what had happened, pressing closer to her Swami as she just looked at him, determined to not miss even a second of possibly the happiest occurrence of her life. Separating from him, she moved to lay a soft kiss on his forehead as she murmured “I love you”, moving down to kiss his eyes as she said the same, then onto his cheeks, stopping only when she reached his lips. Drawing back slightly, she watched as his eyes opened as he looked at her, absolute love spilling out of them as he raised himself slightly to cup her face and slowly meld their lips together.

It felt as though a million butterflies had been released in Arulmozhi’s stomach as he finally kissed those lips he had dreamt of for so long, the smile that threatened to overtake his face making it difficult to keep kissing her like he wanted to. Drawing away only a few millimeteres to breathe he said, “You do know now there is no question of you ever avoiding me?”

Vanathi giggled as he said that, replying, “If avoiding you gets you to be so poetic, Swami, I will gladly do it.”

Arulmozhi too felt a laugh bubbling inside of him as he got up and lifted his arasi in his arms to spin her around even as more laughter spilled forth from her lips, stopping only to press their foreheads together and say, “You are my whole heart Vanathi.”

“And you are my everything, Arase,” she whispered, shyly kissing the corner of his lips, blushing but wanting to shower him with her love.

He kissed her lips over and over, still twirling her, both of them joyous in the colours their life and love took. 

*****

@vibishalakshman @thelekhikawrites @nspwriteups @dumdaradumdaradum @dr-scribbler @willkatfanfromasia @kovaipaavai @celestesinsight @thirst4light @rang-lo @thegleamingmoon @theambidexterousarcher @whippersnappersbookworm @chiyaanvikram @hollogramhallucination @arachneofthoughts @krishna-sahacharini

[twifairy]

Actually fuck it who wants a list of the genklintville/baskerzieks/genklint (and Genshin's wife) fic ideas i have in my drafts!! I will tell you about them!

Also a few gen fics related to those characters:

Gen fics but related to Genshin/Klint/Baskerville

AU where Mikotoba and Sholmes witness Baskerville murdering Stronghart and let her get away with it. Charles Augustus Milverton scene rewrite

Barok and Kazuma discussing what kind of person Lady B was

Genshin has a challenge— a reward for any Scotland Yard inspector who can guess the story behind how he got his ring. When nobody figures it out, he tells Klint.

Dynamic study with Genshin, Courtney, Stronghart, and Klint

Genshin and his wife

Relationship study because I don't think they were in love but I think they were interesting

Same as the last one but it's a study of his wife after Genshin dies

Baskersogi (I've decided that's their ship name bc it's funny sounding)

Just the two of them discussing marriage and the law and love. Yknow like how Arthur Conan Doyle always complains about divorce law.

Baskerzieks:

Klint introducing Stronghart to ✨️💖his beautiful wife💖✨️ because Stronghart would be soooo annoyed. I need them to be so in love i need to leave the room. I need them to be GROSS.

First kiss fic. Historical repressed romance yknow how it is. I just like when they are extremely in love and happy and sweet to each other, it makes the tragedy even better when it hits imo

First meeting fic. I think Klint should find smart people extremely attractive and Lady Baskerville is a GENIUS.

baskerzieks fluff ficlet I cut out of my Professor Killings fic

Genklint:

Dead Klint reviewing his own crime scene but he's a little too proud of Genshin?

Ghost Klint. Haunting Genshin's holding cell. Or maybe Genshin's losing it.

Companion piece to the Professor killings fic, because it's more bskz heavy

Fic I wrote because there will be simultaneous Baskersithe shenanigans

Early friendship— Genshin is assigned busy work that ends up being acting as Klint's bodyguard when he does not need one. Based on Watson having to stick around Henry Baskerville in HOUN

"Why did you kill all those people" "My beloved detective is like 80% of my impulse control."

Genklintville:

Stronghart is trying to find details on Klint's life to manipulate him with and asks Genshin if he knows anything about Baskerville. He lies.

Double drabble of them working late together on case notes.

Ghost genklint, a bit of grieving when they realize their beloved Lady Baskerville is about to die

getting together fic??

Me using my historical corsetry knowledge for evil (to bully Genshin Asogi with)

Christmas! Up now!

Baskerville has noticed her husband's huge dumb stupid dumb idiot crush on Genshin and she is going to Do Something about it.

Genklintville rewrite of The Second Stain with Genshin in Holmes' place and Barok in Watson's. I think Baskerville deserves to be a little insane too.

I am the Director of Prosecutions, I did not forget about our meeting— I am not blushing, detective. So what if I am in good spirits because my fiancée came to visit m— lipstick? No. You must be mistaken, I checked— I mean a gentleman would NEVER have an unmarried lady's makeup on his face. That's absurd— STOP LAUGHING.

[darcydarlingdabbles]

Let Me Be Your Light

Phantom of the Opera/Romantasy AU ~ 3.4 k

Explicit Excerpt from my ongoing fic Charlie and Vaggie explore escape the castle for the glowing gardens of Morningstar Castle, and a little time alone~

-------{--(@

Charlie led Vaggie by the hand out into the gardens as the last vestiges of the sun cast a warm, red-pink glow over Morningstar Castle. 

The hellish scarlet sky seemed to have softened just for them—though it always turned a little rosier during the sunset and sunrise. 

Which meant now was the perfect time for Charlie to take a romantic stroll with her not-girlfriend—and show her something amazing. 

Vaggie, her white hair catching the golden light, sent a speculative glance over at the princess. “Is this going to help you with your singing, hon?”

“I mean it can’t hurt, right?” Charlie grinned, her tone playful, if not a little mischievously as she swung their arms and pulled them around the glistening fountains. 

The shadows from the castle gathered on the veranda behind them, but seemed to pool and halt right at the edge of the open marble porch—unable to follow Charlie out in the garden with the last dregs of the sun still up. 

Charlie hummed happily as they strolled into her mother’s lush green garden. It was comfortable, familiar, a sanctuary with walls and barriers separating it from the chaos of the Kingdom of Hell beyond. 

“Suuuure it is,” Vaggie teased, openly flirtatious for the first time. And thrilling the princess as she stretched out her white wings and took in the warm air between her pristine feathers. 

She loved making her angel happy. Charlie just wished that they could always be like this—alone and together. Able to be who they really were, if only for a little while. 

She knew that they would have to return to the castle soon, back to the roles and scripts they were born into. but for now, she was content to simply enjoy this moment.

She squeezed Vaggie’s hand, feeling a surge of affection for the angel by her side.

“I’m so glad you’re here with me,” Charlie murmured, her voice barely audible over the rustling of the leaves.

 Vaggie looked up at her, her eyes finally softened “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” she replied, leaning in.

Charlie wanted to kiss her angel then and there, right now. But she felt the unease as she leaned close. Vaggie’s gaze darted towards the castle doors, still in view around the fountain. 

No doubt thinking about her fellow angelic guards they passed on their way outside. 

Charlie settled for pressing a sweet kiss to the back of her hand, and pulling her further into the garden. 

The princess’s excitement was palpable, and she practically bounced on the balls of her feet as she led Vaggie towards a hidden corner of the green space.

“I know you’re probably wondering why I dragged you out here,” Charlie said, giggled.

“You didn’t have to drag me.” Vaggie protested. 

“But trust me, you’re going to love it.” 

Vaggie raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything.

As they rounded a corner, Charlie came to a sudden stop. Vaggie nearly collided with her, but just ended up brushing up against her crimson skirt. 

Charlie’s eyes were fixed on something in front of them, and the angel quickly followed her gaze.

Nestled within a tranquil glade was an awe-inspiring sight—a topiary, meticulously crafted to resemble the beautiful Queen Lilith. The evergreen figure stood tall, her figure lovingly carved from living leaves, her lush hair etched in verdant foliage cascading down her back. 

Even more enchanting, was the radiant light that surrounded Lilith. A warm, golden aura emanated from within its leafy veins, casting an ethereal glow that bathed the entire clearing in an otherworldly light.

Charlie knew that was what her father had created. That he had trapped some of his glowing angelic orbs inside the image of his beloved wife. So she would shine forever. 

“She’s beautiful,” Vaggie breathed, her strong voice gone soft with awe. “This is your mother?”

Charlie beamed. 

“Yeah, it is! It was my idea to make it, and it enchant it so it’s always in full bloom.” The princess looked up at the image of the first Queen of Hell, her own eyes starting to get a bit misty. “It’ll never fade or wither away, no matter what time of year it is.”

“Oh Charlie, that’s beautiful.” Vaggie murmured. 

“Yeah, she really was.” the princess murmured, filling her eyes well up as she looked up at her mother’s enchanted image. 

It felt so lifelike, and yet so still. Never to change again. It filled her with a heady cocktail of emotions—pride and sadness. But more than anything, there was this longing ache for her mother. 

Like the memories from seven years ago had already faded far too quickly. 

A frown drew across Vaggie’s lips as she pulled the other closer. 

“It’s okay, Charlie,” she whispered, her breath warm against the princess’s ear. “I’m here for you.”

And finally, finally, Charlie felt the angel’s warm arms slipping around her middle. Pulling her in close. Her wing just starting to drape over the half-demon’s shoulder. 

Charlie leaned into the hug, feeling the softness of Vaggie’s white and gold feathers against her cheek.

“I just miss her so much,” Charlie said, her voice choked with emotion. “It’s hard to believe she’s really gone.”

Vaggie squeezed her tighter, her wings enveloping Charlie in a protective cocoon. “I know it’s hard,” she said. “But she’s still with you, in a way. She’s a part of you, and she always will be.”

 She took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of the garden around them: the rich earthiness of the autumn leaves, the sweetness of the roses, the faint metallic tang of the castle’s distant fires. It was a comforting smell, one that reminded her of home.

The blonde turned and pressed close to her companion, resting her chin against the top of Vaggie’s head. “I’m so glad you’re here with me.” She repeated, her voice turning low and heated as she murmured against the other’s ear. 

Vaggie gave a giggle, turning her head towards the princess. “You said that already, hon.” She teased lightly, turning towards the other woman. 

“I just wanted to emphasize that—”

Vaggie cut Charlie off by finally pressing their lips together. She cupped the younger’s cheek, pulling her in close to sweeten the kiss. 

 Charlie’s eyes fluttered closed, and she felt a wave of pure happiness wash over her. This sense of belonging, of something that was so right despite all the walls between them. And as she kissed Vaggie, she knew that she never wanted to let her go.

Vaggie’s wings fluttered around them, creating a soft, feathery cocoon that blocked out the rest of the world. 

Charlie’s heart raced as her hands wandered over the stiff fabric of Vaggie’s soldier jacket, her fingers itching to undo the golden ties and fastens and feel the soft blouse and skin underneath. 

But….someone from the castle could still wander their way, and catch them. 

Suddenly Vaggie grabbed Charlie’s shoulders, pushing her back to separate their lips. “What was that?” She asked, eyes narrowed as she peeked out between her feathers.

The princess pulled back, looking around, but all she saw was that the sky above them had turned from its deep pink to a dark, reddish purple. Hinting at the first sparkling stars. 

“I thought I saw…some sort of shadow.” Vaggie murmured, her lips pressed tight in a frown as she lowered her wings to have a better look around. 

“It’s just a guard, I’m sure,” Charlie said, trying to reassure Vaggie. “We’re safe.”

Vaggie gave an unconvinced grunt, her grip on Charlie tightening. “I’m not sure,” she said, her voice laced with concern. “Stay close to me.”

Charlie nodded, her heart pounding in her chest. She could feel Vaggie’s wings expanding slightly, ready to take flight if necessary. 

But nothing manifested from the growing darkness. 

“Come on,” Charlie urged, taking the angel’s hand in hers. “Let’s keep exploring—I want to show you one more thing.”

Vaggie stayed still as a sentinel statue for a long moment, before he nodded. “Lead the way.”

-------{--(@

“You’re going to love this,” Charlie trilled with purest excitement. 

Unfolding before them was an enchanting secret sanctuary, veiled from prying eyes by a towering hedge of thickly woven ivy leaves, their glossy surfaces shimmering in the dark purple night. 

The plants were not ordinary greenery but living lanterns that painted the night with their soft glow. There were tall stalks of moonlit ferns standing like sentinels on either side of the path, their fronds unfurling into delicate lacework patterns that glittered with a supernatural silver sheen.

Clusters of midnight roses lined the edges of the path, their dark petals brushed with strokes of starlight, casting a gentle sapphire radiance that danced upon Vaggie’s awestruck face. 

Between these spectral beauties were beds filled with bioluminescent lilies and irises. Their vibrant hues were amplified by their inherent glow—purples so deep they mirrored the twilight sky and blues so bright they rivalled the ocean’s depth on a sunny day. At least, so Charlie had seen in her father’s old story books. 

A carpet of luminescent moss spread across patches on the ground; it was like walking over constellations trapped beneath your feet, each step sending ripples of light across the verdant canvas. 

The entire garden was bathed in a soft, bioluminescent glow, a living tapestry of light and color that transformed the night into a celestial dreamscape.

“Wow,” Vaggie breathed, her eyes wide with wonder. “This is amazing.”

Charlie grinned, pleased with her companion’s reaction. “I discovered it a few weeks ago,” she said, her voice filled with pride. “I come here sometimes to escape the castle and clear my head. Politics is exhausting sometimes.”

As they walked through the garden, hand in hand, Charlie felt a sense of peace settle over her.

She glanced over at Vaggie, who was smiling up at her 

“Thank you for showing me this,” the angel hummed. 

Charlie’s smile grew wider. “I’d do anything for you,” she said, leaning down to press a soft kiss to Vaggie’s lips.

“Anything, huh?” the angel guard teased into the kiss. 

The glow of the bioluminescent plants seemed to cast a spell over the two, a secrecy that pulsed with anticipation. 

A surge of desire welled up in the Princess as their lips met again, kisses turning feverish as she felt her own heartbeat quicken in time with Vaggie’s. 

The subtle rustle of feathers cocooned back around them, closing Charlie in the warmth radiating from the angelic soldier in her arms. Until the world around them, outside of the glowing garden, faded to nothing.

Her fingers slid down the front of the uniform, undoing the jacket, as the pristine feathers turned fluffy—with arousal. 

Charlie practically jumped into Vaggie’s arms. Sending them both tumbling over into the starry moss beside the midnight roses, both laughing as they fell. 

“Charlie!” Vaggie tried to admonish, but it was ruined by her musical laugh. 

“Whaat?”

Without breaking the intimate embrace, the half-demon lifted herself to straddle the angel’s hips. Her hands came to grip the dress bunched at the princess’s thighs as Vaggie eagerly leaned up into another kiss. 

Slowly, Charlie eased open the uniform jacket, revealing the ruffled white blouse she wore as she trailed kisses along the gray skin of her companion’s neck. Feeling the divine pulse fluttering underneath. 

The princess dragged her tongue along the purplish vein, feeling the edge of her horns wanting to peek out from her blonde hair as she dragged the loose collar of Vaggie’s shirt away from her breast. 

“Charlie…” 

Her name sounded like music on the angel’s tongue. 

Vaggie’s fingers slipped into Charlie’s hair, making the princess have to focus on pulling back her horns as she dropped her mouth to her companion’s chest. Her forked tongue lavished attention on the dark grey nipple, working it taught as the angel squirmed beneath her in the soft grass. 

Which just made her want to give more attention to the other side of her chest. 

“Charlie, please.” Vaggie whined, her back arching off of the moss and pressing more into that sinful mouth. “Let me touch you.”

“You can always touch me,” She hummed, though she refused to let up. 

Charlie felt it the moment Vaggie’s fingers found their way under her hitched skirt, clawing at her lacy under garments. 

The princess was already soaked—she had been from that first heated kiss. She’d missed her girlfriend so damn much. It didn’t matter that Vaggie was stationed in Hell—the few days she returned to Heaven durning the equinox were always too long. 

Vaggie dug her heels into the grass, pulling Charlie into her with her puffed up wings, finally getting into her undeerthings. 

“Vaggie,” Charlie moaned breathlessly as fingers finally touched her, just brushing over her clit before sliding inside her. Making her shiver with desperate need. 

They knew each other well now. Had spent countless nights in the Princess’s chambers exploring each other, loving each fluffed up feather and Charlie’s eagerly flicking tail. 

But now wasn’t the time for hours and hours of adoring. 

Charlie’s fingers fumbled with the buttons on Vaggie’s slacks, even as she rocked her hips onto the angel’s curling digits, desperately grinding into her palm. 

“Honey, let me—”

“Please,  don’t stop.” Charlie begged, her eyes cloudy with her pleasure, chasing desperately as the heel of Vaggie’s hand rubbed against her clit. 

The half-demon’s tail slashed out behind her. Colliding harmlessly with the wings surrounding her. 

Charlie tried again, nearly tearing at the white pants, desperate to feel her, to please her beloved companion too. When Vaggie lifted herself from the ground, and pushed the princess over into the grass. 

The laugh bubbling from the blonde’s lips before Vaggie’s mouth was back on hers, tasting her tongue as her hand was back under Charlie’s skirts. Pushing her pale thighs open as she pinned her to the ground. 

Vaggie was never this…assertive. And Charlie trembled eagerly under her, tugging at her short hair as she took everything the angel gave. 

Those heavenly fingers curled back into her pussy, driving her closer and closer—as Vaggie ground herself against Charlie’s trapped thigh. 

“Baby—” the princess barely had a chance to whine as she tumbled over the edge at last. Her head throan back by a keening moan as she clenched around Vaggie’s fingers. Curling into her walls, dragging out every ounce of pleasure, until she fell limp in her lover’s hold. 

The soft glow of the bioluminescent garden cast an ethereal light on Charlie’s flushed cheeks as she pulled away from Vaggie’s lips.

 She was panting, her chest heaving, and her her hands newly determined to get those damn pants off of the angel

.Vaggie’s wings were already puffy with arousal above her, blocking out the deep sky sparkling with stars, the feathers shimmering with a golden iridescence that seemed to mirror the light of the garden.

Charlie’s own demon tail swayed back and forth between her, growing in eagerness again. She could feel the slickness run down her thighs, the wetness that Vaggie had caused with just her fingers. 

She wanted more.

“Vaggie,” Charlie breathed, her voice husky with desire. “I want...I need...”

Vaggie’s hands were still inside Charlie’s lacy underwear, her fingers teasing and rubbing in all the right places. Charlie moaned, her hips bucking against Vaggie’s hand.

“What do you need, love?” the angel hummed against her ear, kissing her flushed pink skin. Making the princess squirm when she said that name. 

“I need, to touch you, too.” Charlie whined as kisses were making their way down the neckline of her dress.

 Vaggie was already asking, “Can I taste you, Charlie?” as her lips landed between the Princess’s breasts. 

Charlie’s heart skipped a beat at the question, and she could only nod her head in response. Vaggie’s eyes sparkled with desire as she lowered herself between Charlie’s splayed legs.

Her wings stretched out above them, casting their golden shadow over the princess as Charlie thrashed and whined beneath the angel. Feathers brushed her bare skin, their softness sending shivers down her spine. 

Her fingers grabbed desperately for Vaggie’s hair, as her tail wrapped around her waist to keep her close. 

Vaggie was good at distracting her. Clearing her mind of politics and court drama—but she was also good at keeping Charlie from reciprocating. Like the angel guard didn’t deserve to feel the princess’s hands on her. 

But, Vaggie wasn’t entirely out of Charlie’s reach. 

 Charlie’s tail twitched and writhed, worming dexterously around the angel’s waist—until it finally slid into those damn tight pants. 

The angel was soaked. Her undergarments drenched as Charlie’s tail found Vaggie’s folds. Sliding between them to collect her slick, before rubbing at the other’s swollen clit. 

Vaggie’s delighted cry vibrated against Charlie, making them both squirm. 

“Not…not fair.” the angel panted against Charlie’s core. 

“More than fair.” Charlie laughed, twitching the tip of her tail to tease her further. 

Vaggie gasped out a curse against Charlie, grinding her hips forward, before blindly delving back between her lover’s legs. 

 Charlie gripped Vaggie’s short hair, pulling her closer as she bucked her hips against her companion’s face.

The world around them seemed to fade away as they lost themselves in each other, their bodies moving in a perfect duet. 

Charlie could feel the pressure building inside her, the tension coiling like a spring. And then, with one final flick of Vaggie’s tongue, Charlie couldn’t hold back anymore.

Her body convulsed as she cried out, her magic bursting off of her in a flash of red light. Vaggie followed soon after, her golden magic mixing with Charlie’s as they came together.

The Princess lay panting and spent in the grass. Vaggie lay beside her, her wings wrapped around them like a protective cocoon once again.

“I love you,” Charlie whispered, her voice barely audible.

Vaggie stiffened in her arms, her soft wings gone ridged around them. 

“You don’t have to—”

“You mean the world to me Charlie, you know that.” Vaggie murmured, leaning up, pressing a kiss to her lips. That Charlie couldn’t help but think tasted just a little bit…like sorrow. Or regret.

Like she would never be able to have all of the angel, not all that she wanted. 

But the princess tried not to think about that. 

She closed her eyes, letting the sound of Vaggie’s heartbeat lull her for as long as the spell would hold. 

But as the night wore on, and the garden began to fade into darkness, Charlie knew that they would have to return to the castle. To the responsibilities and duties that awaited them. But for now, they had this moment. And that was enough. 

Charlie wanted it to be enough. 

Vaggie’s wings rustled as she sat up, the golden feathers shimmering as they faded back to white. 

Charlie groaned, her body still humming with pleasure as she buried her face and tried to stay a little while longer. 

“We should get back to the castle,” Vaggie said softly, her voice barely above a whisper.

Charlie’s tail twitched in protest, wrapping itself tighter around Vaggie’s waist. 

“Just five more minutes,” she pleaded, her voice muffled against Vaggie’s clothes.

Vaggie sighed, her fingers tracing gentle patterns on Charlie’s back. “Charlie, we can’t stay out here all night.”

Charlie sat up, her eyes meeting Vaggie’s. “Why not?” she asked, her voice filled with longing. “I want to stay here with you forever.”

Vaggie’s expression softened, her wings curling protectively around Charlie. “I want that too, Charlie. But we can’t..”

Charlie’s shoulders slumped, her tail drooping between her legs before it finally vanished. “I know,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. 

Vaggie leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to Charlie’s forehead. “But we’ll come back here again. I promise.”

Charlie’s eyes brightened, a small smile playing on her lips. “You promise?”

Vaggie nodded, her wings fluttering softly. “I promise. Now come on, let’s get back before someone comes looking for us.”

Charlie reluctantly got to her feet. 

As they walked back towards the castle, Charlie couldn’t help but feel a sense of sadness wash over her. She knew that they couldn’t stay in the garden forever, but it was hard to leave a place that felt so perfect.

Follow the Fic on Ao3

[mothergold]

happy new years friends and followers! i remember doing one of these when i first joined fanfic tumblr and i’m feeling nostalgic so i thought i’d make one since it’s been awhile and i have some (positive) things to say!!

okay here goes!! putting everything under a readmore to not clog the dash <3

@tighnarly — hi baby. my princess, cupcake, gum drop, bunny baby <3 i’m so happy and grateful to have you as my future wife and i can’t wait for the day we get married. i know i mostly post about my fictional fav (albedo :p) but you’re truly all i want and need 🫶🏻 everytime i write a fanfic i’m thinking of you and me. every word i write is a love letter to you from me. i know i’m not the best with words but i hope one day you’ll be able to see you the way i see you. trust me when i say you are the most beautiful and kind human i have ever met in my life, and i’m gonna personally fight everyone and anyone who hurts you 😗 anywaysss hehe i love you sunshine 💖🫶🏻

@neuvillettes — bestieeeeeee my bestie from the westie 🫶🏻 i’m so glad we met and connected online bc now we legit our roommates and it’s so fun 😭🤚🏻 like i legit dont know how to tell you how much our friendship means to me. ur fr that one person that just GETS me. you’re so kind and funny and fun to be around, but i also love that ur not afraid to be honest with me, especially when i need that tough love approach. i love you oh so much bestie 💖 oh and thank you for the art tablet i literally am still screaming over it hehe.

@suyacho — my beloved bestie 🫶🏻 there is no one i love rambling about my selfship thots about more than you. i love how i can talk to you about anything and everything 🥹🫶🏻 i especially love how patient and supportive you’ve been of me this year, because it meant the entire world to me. i’m so glad we’re besties and i can’t wait for the day i meet you irl 🫶🏻💖mwah ily bestie hehe me, kaeya, and albedo are smoochin u rn 💖 (platonic)

@auphelia — mootie sweet sweet mootie. it always makes me happy seeing you on the dash, and i especially smile whenever i see u in my tags whether it’s a fic or just a regular old post. i get so giddy whenever i talk to u bc u are fr one cool pal!! i’m so glad we’re mooties! and i have to say i can’t wait to see what more you write because you are very talented 💖

@fleur-de-leap — leap!! i know i am very sporadic with my messages but i legit get so happy to interact with you and even more so when i see/read ur art/writing! you’re so fucking talented in so many ways and every day it truly impresses me! when we made the server together that day it made me SO happy and i get so happy seeing i get messages from you 💖 thank you for being my friend through all these years, truly it’s been a blessing.

@shig-a-shig-ah — bestie!!!!! my BESTIEEEE 🥹🫶🏻 i hope u know u mean the entire world to me. i can’t believe we’ve been friends since the beginning of my writing journey, it’s wild! istg ONE DAY BESTIE, ONE DAY we will meet and it will be the best day ever 🥹🫶🏻 ily bestie mwah

@blkladyelle — elle!! my beloved!! it’s so nice whenever i see you on the dash, and i’m always especially happy whenever i get a dm from you! i hope you feel loved and happy this upcoming year and that it holds so much positivity for you. because fuck i need you to have a good year!!! i love you sm and wanted to let you know my dm’s are always open for you 🫶🏻💖

@nc-vb — mootie aka my fellow albedo lover i get so happy whenever i see u interact with me, and i want you to know i’m always rooting for you! you’re writing is so good and honestly you’ve been such a joy to talk to in dm’s, and you’re so easy to talk to. i hope this year good things happen to you, because you truly deserve the world bub 🫶🏻

@4izawas — bestie cas!! i know we just became mutuals but u are legit one of the coolest people on this app! ur writing is fucking god tier and you are legit one of the funniest fuckers i know 😭💖 can’t count the amount of times u’ve made me giggle from something u said 🤭 i’m manifesting that aizawa confesses his love to u this year!!! 💖

if you’re not listed here it’s purely either because i forgot or we didn’t talk too much this year. so, please don’t take it personally if i didn’t include you!! i love all me mooties 🫶🏻💖

[c-e-d-dreamer]

The fandom is so lucky to have you! We appreciate having you here and all that you contribute to it ❤️❤️

1. What brought you into the fandom?

2. What character(s) do you feel the most connected to and why?

3. Out of all of SJM’s books, which one means the most to you and why?

4. Out of all of the SJM couples (fanon, canon, endgame, etc) which one means the most to you and why?

Keep doing you ❤️

Oooooo! How fun! I am all for some positivity in this fandom and this is so so sweet 🥰

1. What brought you into the fandom?

So I read the ACOTAR series in spring of 2021 after they went viral on TikTok post-ACOSF (yes, I'm one of those people who read it because of TikTok, please don't judge me) and then I made the mistake that summer of trying to engage with the TikTok fandom.... Dark times.... But thankfully, I still had this Tumblr from my previous fandom days, so I came here for more Nessian content and instead found the beautiful Tumblr Nessian Community (tm). I saw there was a Nessian Appreciation Week in September and decided to dip my toe back into fic writing, and now here I am... Still writing fic but for Nessian Appreciation Week 2024

2. What character(s) do you feel the most connected to and why?

Definitely Nesta, my beloved and my wife! It's funny, when I finally got my best friend to start the series, she knew Nesta was my fave going in, and she didn't even make it that far before I got a text from her saying "oh, I get it now. Nesta is you." Like damn read me to filth I guess 😂 yes, I too have Daddy Issues and refuse to talk about my feelings. But I also relate and love Nesta's love for her sisters! Despite the way this fandom tries to say she doesn't or doesn't love them equally or whatever other BS they're always spouting. Like Nesta would commit a murder for Elain and/or Feyre with 0 hesitation, and honestly? I would for my siblings too.

3. Out of all of SJM's books, which one means the most to you and why?

Hmmm.... Tough question. I've only read the ACOTAR series (I DNFed CC, sorry). I guess I'd have to say ACOSF? I will say as much as I shit on that book and the questionable/terrible choices SJM made as a writer in that book, there is a lot of good that I love. I love that we got to see the other side of the coin, to really understand and experience what Nesta was going through, and seeing that on page really did mean a lot to me. I just wish we got more than the two dimensional mess we got from the other POV. Wish we got more actual romance and more actual healing. But alas....

4. Out of all of the SJM couples (fanon, canon, endgame, etc) which one means the most to you and why?

I mean I have to say Nessian, my beloveds. They got me back into writing fics after I hadn't written one since like 2015. But even more than that, without Nessian, I never would have met the lovely people on this app that I get to call genuine friends now. I love our small little corner of the fandom where we try our hardest to mind our business and make Cassian suffer but also hit it aka make him better

[moon-spirit-yue]

It's Not Living (if it's Not With You)

Chapter 1: Raya Ran into Some Complications

(TW WARNING!!!!!! This mini series is based heavily on the show Criminal Minds so if murder mysteries and descriptions of that sort of thing are not for you, just don’t read this fic. It’s not like my other fics where I let you know of a small uncomfortable part. I really don’t want to make this fic too horrific and gory, but it will get dark. Basically, if you can get though an episode of Criminal Minds this fic will be fine. These sorts of topics are not for everyone so please just be aware of this if you choose to proceed)

“Please don’t hurt me this way! I have a wife! And a sweet baby boy! How could you be so cruel?!” Raya whimpered, turning her head away from the monster that was trying to torture her.

“God, you are so dramatic,” Noi snorted without looking up from her book. 

“Okay first of all, your “wife” does not count, and second, you don’t have any kids,” Tong began before getting cut off.

“Objection! Tuk Tuk is my beautiful son and I don’t appreciate you acting like he isn’t,” Raya huffed. “And I am married! Sisu and I have the certificate framed and everything! What’s with the judgement? Is it because we’re gay?” 

“I’m pretty sure the judgement is coming from the fact that you two only got married to get grant money for college,” Boun laughed.

“And who the hell asked you, twerp?” Raya glared.

“Your dog and sham marriage do not count,” Tong sighed.

“You know, you’re being awfully negative to someone who literally got shot at this morning,” Raya grumbled as she reluctantly opened her eyes.

“Yeah well, the unsub missed and honestly? I’m kinda wishing he met his mark. Now wake up,” the unit chief scowled. 

“Oh please! We’re the smallest unit in the BAU! If I get shot and go out of commission we’d literally have no choice but to dissolve and relocate to other units,” Raya scoffed. “And you know that Noi despises change.”

“It’s true. My mother used a different kind of cereal to feed me as kid because my usual stuff was out of stock and I protested by refusing to eat breakfast until I got my cereal back,” Noi confirmed.

“And you call me dramatic,” Raya laughed.

The bickering continued like it always did until they finally landed back in Quantico, their beloved home base. The quartet wearily got off the plane single file and entered the FBI building. It was long a flight and they were all ready to crash.

“Hello my dazzling little agents! How is everyone?” Sisu greeted them once they got on their floor.

“Feeling like I’m about to pass out. The guy was maniac. I mean, who carries three guns on their person at all times? Even for a serial killer, it’s a tad excessive,” Boun groaned.

“I do not envy any of you. It’s bad enough I have to see the crime photos, I could not imagine having to see the guy that caused them, let alone capture him,” Sisu shivered.

“This job is certainly not for the faint of heart,” Tong confirmed.

That was the understatement of the year. 

“Agreed. Hey Sisu, can you drive me? If I go behind the wheel I’m scared I’ll fall asleep,” Raya asked.

“Anything for the wife!” Sisu laughed. Boun and Noi had small smiles on their faces as Tong loudly sighed in displeasure.

“The sanctity of marriage is wasted on you people!” Tong declared.

“We’ll get a divorce one day, don’t worry sir,” Raya giggled.

“A man can only dream. Alright, before we all disperse, I do want to say that you all truly outdid yourselves this past week. The unsub did his damn hardest to shake us off, but we managed to pull through. I really am proud of how this team has grown,” Tong said.

The other four agents beamed at his words. As much as the whole team likes picking on each other at every possible opportunity, they really did care about each other and yearned for their boss’s approval. The next words he said were not nearly as uplifting.

“We’re going to need to get in here early tomorrow. We’re all behind on some important documents that have to get on my desk by the end of the month,” the unit chief stated with a stern look on his face. 

“Boooooo!” Boun groaned. 

“Dang it, I thought he forgot about that,” Noi mumbled.

Raya just decided to stick with her classic pout. She’s getting too tired to talk.

“On that note, I’m going home to my wife, that I married for the right reasons,” Tong said, shooting a look at Raya and Sisu. 

The other four then went their separate ways, mumbling some tired goodbyes and see you tomorrows. Sisu had to practically drag Raya to her car and shoved her in. 

“At least stay awake until we get home,” Sisu sighed while starting the car.

“Can we just go to your place for night? Tuk Tuk’s already there and it’s closer,” Raya mumbled.

Tuk Tuk always stayed with Sisu when Raya was out on assignments so she really didn’t feel like relocating him tonight. Plus, she had a good portion of her stuff at Sisu’s anyways.

“I had a feeling you’d say that. Your bed is already made,” Sisu laughed.

“Have I told you that I literally love you?” the agent yawned.

“It certainly wouldn’t hurt me to hear it more often,” Sisu laughed. 

“Oh, do you still need help dying your roots?” Raya asked. 

She was now vaguely remembering Sisu asking for her help at some point when she was out on her previous assignment. Considering the fact that some dude with mommy issues damn near killed her, the text was shoved in the back of Raya’s mind for a hot minute.  

“Yeah, but let’s save that for tomorrow. I don’t think you can be trusted with anything permanent right now,” her best friend said, side eyeing how Raya was nodding off.

It took everything in her to muster up the strength to give Sisu a thumbs up, so that’s probably for the best. Raya’s pretty sure she did fall asleep during the brief car ride because she blinked and bam! There was Sisu’s house.

“Carry me,” Raya demanded, slumped over.

“Oh my god,” Sisu groaned

After much pulling and tugging on Sisu’s part, they made it through the front door and was greeted by Tuk Tuk’s little yips of happiness. Raya grinned the second she saw her fluffy puppy and began pressing kisses on his furry face.

“I missed you, my beautiful baby! Oh yes I did! Yes I did!” Raya cooed as her precious pup licked her cheek.

“I’m gonna turn in. Anything you need?” Sisu asked her.

“Uh, can you drop Tuk and I off at our house before work? I just got the notification that my package got delivered and it is dangerously unsupervised right now. Other than that I’m good,” Raya explained.

“That’s fine. See you tomorrow, bestie. Love you! And I love you too Tuk!” Sisu said while scratching his fluffy ears.

“We love you too. Night!” Raya waved as she walked into her designated room.

She kicked off her shoes and changed her clothes before immediately flopping on the bed. Raya heard Tuk Tuk jump on the bed and snuggled right next to her. She multitasked by using one hand to pet her dog and the other to text her father she’s back in Quantico, safe and sound. 

One of the major downsides of this job is knowing her father is going into cardiac arrest whenever a case pops up. He tried to convince her for weeks not to take the job but alas, her mind was made up. So then Benja decided to force to send texts when she left for a case and when she came back. Raya carelessly tossed her phone on the other side of the bed once the message was sent and drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

****************************

The best way to wake up is seeing Tuk Tuk’s adorable face right beside her. Man, she missed this dog. 

Raya had to speed through her morning routine to get out the door at a reasonable hour. Ushering Sisu to get moving, Raya and Tuk Tuk were already waiting in her car by the time she got in.

“You know, you’re a lot less pushy when you’re tired,” Sisu huffed while driving off.

“It’s not my fault someone’s stealing packages from people’s doorsteps!” Raya exclaimed.

“You’re a profiler, catch them!” Sisu snapped.

“Too busy tracking down serial killers, thank you,” Raya told her.

“I hope you have an extra load of paperwork to finish,” Sisu glared.

“You are so hateful in the morning,” Raya frowned. 

They made it to Raya’s front door with no serious injuries, so she grabbed Tuk Tuk and made her way home.

“Do you want me to wait for you?” Sisu yelled.

“I’m good! See you in the office!” Raya yelled back.

Her beloved wife nodded and proceeded to drive to work. Raya turned her attention to where her packages get dropped off at. 

She absolutely beamed at seeing her mail sitting there, unstolen by the neighborhood thief. Raya grabbed the package and tapped the passcode lock combo to let herself and Tuk in.

Raya awkwardly opened the door to let Tuk Tuk in first and kicked her package in the house. Stumbling in herself, she gave the house a quick clean from it’s lack of use. Once Raya finished eating cereal straight from the box, she was already back out the door.

“Tuk Tuk, take care of the house for me while I’m gone, will ya?” Raya asked the little pup. He gave a bark in response which in Raya’s mind meant he totally agreed to her task. 

“I love you bud! See you tonight!” Raya said before locking up her house and getting into her car.

The FBI building wasn’t that far away but of course it was far away enough to hit some major morning traffic. Patience isn’t exactly where Raya shines. She didn’t even have the time to go to her favorite coffee place.

Finally, she was able to make her exit and entered the building of her workplace. She walked up to her desk to be greeted with Boun and Noi arguing over what case they think will be chosen next.

“I’m telling you, those murders down in Texas have to be serial! There’s just too many gun related deaths!” Noi exclaimed. 

“No way, there’s several missing people in North Carolina that have never returned for the past couple weeks! Oh Raya, you’re here! Hey, which case do you think is the next one?” Boun asked as she plopped into her small cubicle.

“No clue. Have either of you guys started your paperwork just at a curiosity?” Raya asked, pulling over her papers. 

Noi and Boun looked at each other guiltily before scrambling to get their own papers out. Raya snorted and shook her head before focusing in on her own work. Those two remind her of actual kids and the fact that they’re both younger than her doesn’t help.

The day was an uncommonly quiet one. Tong summoned them all near the end of it to discuss the files they had to get through in one of the meeting rooms.

“We did make good progress on what we finished today, but there’s still a hell of a lot more to be done. I highlighted which ones are top priority and we need to-” Tong began but was cut off by a random voice.

“SSA Spine, I’m very sorry to interrupt, but someone needs to speak to one of your agents,” the person told them.

“Did any of you have plans for company?” Tong asked with a raised brow. 

The other four agents shook their head while giving each other looks. Who on earth could be looking for one of them? 

“Well which agent do they need? And who’s asking?” Tong questioned further.

“Oh, Virana Fang wanted to speak with Agent Heart,” the woman said.

Raya’s blood somehow chilled and boiled at the same time. Seriously, Virana? Of all the fucking people that could meet with her? 

“Isn’t she like, a big time attorney? Raya, did you get into someone legal trouble?” Boun asked with furrowed brows.

“No, no I did not get into legal troubles. We know each other from uh, I guess when I was in college. And let me tell you, she is not a fan of mine. The fact that she’s here is honestly making me feel rather nervous,” Raya frowned. 

“Oh my god, I remember her! Man, she did not like you,” Sisu scoffed.

“Did Mrs. Fang say what exactly she wanted?” Tong asked.

“No, all she said was that it was urgent,” the woman answered.

“Do you want to tell her you aren’t available? I’m not entirely sure what’s going on but I can see your hackles raised, Raya,” Tong said with concern. Raya stood up from her chair.

“There’s no point. The woman’s relentless. If she says she wants to see me, she will see me. I have a feeling I am not going to like this conversation,” the agent sighed as she reluctantly followed the woman.

“Do you want one of us to come with you?” Noi inquired.

“That’s fine. I can take her in a fight,” Raya joked as she left the room. 

Once the door got closed behind her, she allowed the dread to kick. Tong was right, her hackles were raised. What the hell could Virana possibly want with her? 

Raya’s arms were crossed and her jaw clenched as she approached Virana. Oh, how Raya loathed her regal, menacing face. The older woman looked professional and impeccable as Raya has always known her to be. Never a speck of dirt on her clothes nor a strand of her hair out place. Confidence and ferocity ooze from her every pore, ready to suffocate anyone that tries to challenge her. This is how Virana Fang presents herself. 

But the Virana Fang Raya is currently looking at doesn’t have the usual intensity she frequently possesses. Instead she looks around anxiously, like something terrible is about to happen. The agent can’t find it in herself to feel any sort of sympathy for this woman. 

“Virana Fang. Why have you come to haunt me on this otherwise peaceful afternoon?” Raya drawled. Mrs. Fang almost seemed startled to find Raya standing right in front of her.

“I do not have time for your typical unnecessary remarks. Look, I want to keep this as short as possible. The bottom line is, I need your help,” Virana whispered quickly.

“I’m sorry, you need my help? Me? Raya Heart? My help?” Raya asked, utterly baffled. Virana stiffly nodded in response. 

Raya blinked once. Twice. Three times. Then she smiled. A smile turned to a laugh. What kind of bullshit is she playing at?

“Does it sound like I’m joking? What punchline did I just deliver?” the woman hissed. 

“Oh come on, I’m sure even you can see the irony in this? I mean you asked for my help, Mrs. Fang! God that’s hilarious!” Raya laughed. She honestly can’t take this situation seriously. “You know, it’s probably best if you just go. I thought I could get through this conversation but I think I overestimated myself. Please, have the day you deserve.”

Raya shook her head and turned away but the other woman’s hand stopped Raya. The agent looked back and saw how desperate Virana really looked. Before the agent could respond, Virana decided to speak words that alarmed her even more.

“Listen, I am well aware that in a perfect world, we never see each other again, but this world is not perfect. In a perfect world, my daughter would not be in danger,” Virana hissed in a frenzy.

This conversation could not get any more insane. What on earth was going on with Namaari? If Raya had any doubts about helping the lawyer, they were all gone now.

While her and Namaari weren’t exactly having sleepovers and braiding each other’s hair, Raya still cares about her. Plus, Namaari was certainly in better standing with her than Virana. (Then again, the raccoon that dug around in Raya’s trash last week was in better standing with her than Virana so that didn’t really mean much.)

“Fine, I’ll bite. Why is Namaari in danger?” Raya asked with annoyance. 

“Because a serial killer is after her. That’s why I came to you, considering the fact that catching them is your job,” the older told her in a low voice.

The agent’s jaw dropped. A serial killer? After Namaari? Well, to be fair, Namaari is a lawyer so it’s entirely possible a client is out for revenge? 

“How can you be so sure? I assume you came with evidence because this is not something I can just take your word for,” Raya managed to ask.

“Of course I came with proof, but I would prefer to speak of this in a more private setting,” Virana requested. First reasonable thing she’s said since she got here.

“Follow me,” the agent relented. Raya spend up the stairs to the conference room her team was in with Virana hot on her heels. 

“Hey, sir, can I use your office really quickly? It’s important,” Raya asked while gesturing to Virana.

“Of course,” Tong nodded while giving the two of them a suspicious glance. She is so getting interrogated when this conversation is over.

Raya then walked to Tong’s office and closed the door behind her once Virana stepped in. The agent sat on the little couch in the office with crossed arms.

“Lay it on me, Fang. Why do you think a serial killer is coming for Namaari?” Raya asked. 

Virana opened her briefcase and pulled out two envelopes. She handed them both to Raya. 

“Just look at the cases with those two girls that have unfortunately passed away. I’m sure you’ll realize I’m right,” Virana said while sitting on the chair across from her.

The lawyer said it in such a haughty way that it made Raya really hope that there isn’t a case for more than just Namaari’s safety. The agent took the two envelopes from her and opened the first one.

The first girl’s name was Anchali Chakan. She was born in Nebraska, moved to New York when she was ten, then transferred to a college in Maryland where she’s lived ever since. She got married only three months ago to her long time girlfriend, now wife. Or, now widow. A relatively normal upbringing from what Raya can tell. She had dreams of being an artist and made some very impressive pieces before her passing. Now that Raya knows the basics about this girl, it’s time to get into the actual crime that was committed.

Yikes. That is the first word that comes into her mind when she saw the picture of this woman’s untimely death. Raya doesn’t care how many cases she comes across, she will never get over all the horrible ways people kill. 

The murder happened in her house on March 1st. The place where she’s meant to feel safest. There was bruises around Anchali’s neck, an obvious sign of strangulation. Medical reports say that her windpipe got crushed which was the cause of her death. But alas, the atrocities did not stop there. There was an arrow that went straight through her neck. The only thing that made that detail a little less horrific was the fact that the arrow was stabbed into her neck post mortem. Raya cringed, shook her head, and went on to the second case.

The second woman is Cai Lan. She grew up in New York and stayed there until her last days. Unlike Anchali, Cai was born into poverty and had to claw her way out. She had been a foster kid since she was five, homeless for a period time in her late teens, went into massive debt getting into college, and had to live in an RV until three years ago. Cai did manage to make her way into upper society by scoring a manager position at a financial firm.

Cai’s murder occurred exactly one month after the first one, April 1st. It took place in Cai’s home just like Anchali’s. Again, just like Anchali’s murder, Cai was also strangled to death and ended up with an arrow through her neck post mortem. Looking closer at the arrow, Raya was disturbed to find that there was a heart at the front of the arrow. She glanced back at Anchali’s crime scene and found the heart was at the front of her arrow as well. 

Was the killer trying to imitate cupid’s bow? Ah, shit. This case is one hundred percent serial. But Raya still can’t see the connection with Namaari.

“I will give credit where credit is due, this is a serial case. Even though it crosses state lines, the signature is way too specific to be the average murder. I still don’t understand what this has to do with Namaari, though,” Raya sighed, looking up at Virana.

“Both of these girls are Namaari’s ex-girlfriends. Their break ups were very friendly and the two of them stayed in contact with Namaari after their relationships had ended. It’s how she became aware of their passing,” Virana said. 

For the first time since she entered the office, Virana had a mournful look on her face. Raya may have actually found it in her to feel bad for her but there was a very serious problem at hand. Then the attorney handed Raya another envelope, though this one was much smaller.

The very stressed agent opened it up and felt all color drain from her face. There was two plastic baggies with strands of hair. One strand of hair was significantly lighter than the other.

“Please tell me these weren’t mailed to you,” Raya begged, looking up at her. Virana’s grim face told her everything she needed to know.

“Two days after Anchali was killed, we got this bag with the light brown hair. News of her death hadn’t reached us yet, so we weren’t quite sure what to make of it and sent it to the police for investigation and figured out who it belonged to. Same thing with Cai,” Virana told her.

Wordlessly, the agent pulled out her phone to check the date. All the color drained from her face when she saw that today’s date is May 1st. 

“Follow me, we don’t have much time,” Raya commanded.

Raya gathered all of the evidence presented and all but sprinted out of the room. The older woman quickly followed suit. The two of them barreled into the conference office where her teammates were sitting. They all flinched when Raya tossed all the information of this new case on the desk. 

“Listen up people, we have to get through this quickly. Here you see two girls going by the names of Anchali Chakan and Cai Lan. The connection between their murders is the fact that they were both in a romantic relationship with Namaari Fang. They both died from strangulation. Part of the unsub’s signature is to put an arrow through their victim’s neck after they passed,” Raya said, talking a mile a minute.

“So it’s personal. Is, is that a heart at the tip of the bow?” Noi frowned, pulling the photo closer to her.

“Yeah, I think it’s supposed to reference Cupid’s bow. Namaari also received a strand of both the women’s hair two days after they were killed. These murders occurred on the first of March and April. Considering the fact that today is May 1st...,” Raya trailed off.

“We need to act now. I don’t like the fact that she’s been getting gifts or that the unsub knows where she lives. No need to bother collaborating with any local PD, this crosses state lines so we have full jurisdiction,” Tong began, explaining what he’s read in the files. “It’s safe to say that the unsub is targeting those who have had a romantic relationship with Namaari. They’ve also been going in order of who Namaari dated. She was with Chakan from eighth to ninth grade and then Cai from eleventh to twelfth grade. Mrs. Fang, was Namaari with anyone in the time period between Ms. Chakan and Ms. Lan?”

“Uh, kind of. After her break up with Anchali, I got word she did date a couple of other girls but they were just attempts at forming a relationship. Her next real girlfriend was Cai,” Virana answered immediately.

“Okay, looks like the unsub focuses on official relationships. Who did Namaari date after Ms. Lan?” Tong asked.

Raya could have sworn that Virana eyes landed on her before returning to focus on Tong. Must have been a trick of the light.

“From what I’m aware of, the only other girlfriend she had is her now fiancé, Jintara Niran,” Virana told him.

“But you’re not sure?” Tong pressed.

“No, I’m not,” the lawyer confirmed.

“First, please write down your daughter’s address. I take it her and her fiancé live together?” Tong asked. Virana nodded and hastily wrote it down. 

“Perfect. Now I need you to call your daughter and ask if she has had any other serious girlfriend between Ms. Lan and her fiancé and that she needs to be completely honest. If we’re right, she could very well be killed tonight,” Tong instructed. 

Virana turned rather pale at the last statement but nodded nonetheless. She walked out of the room and grabbed her phone, calling her daughter outside. Tong turned to the rest of the group with a serious look in his eyes.

“Okay, Sisu, you head to the computers and start sending police to stand guard at Ms. Fang’s and Ms. Niran’s house right now. If Mrs. Fang is right, the unsub is going for Niran next,” Tong began, but Sisu was practically out the door by the time he was finished with his sentence.

“Boun, I want you to just get to their address and kick start the process of asking them questions. Plus, I want one of our people to be with them as soon as possible,” Tong told him.

“On it!” Boun confirmed, launching himself out of his seat.

“Noi, stay with Virana and get whatever else you can out of her while simultaneously giving her some comfort. I’ll head out to the local PD where they live. It’s only two hours away but we should set up shop there anyways. Two hours can easily be the difference between life and death,” the agent told the only girls left.

“You got it boss man!” Noi nodded.

“And Raya, you know those case files I had you look at for review?” Raya nodded, causing Tong to continue. “I want you to get those files then head to the local PD with Boun. There’s a case in there similar to this one so we can get a better idea of how to handle this.”

“Understood, sir. I’ve got it covered,” Raya told him while rushing to get out of the room. 

Holy shit. Someone has been killing Namaari’s ex girlfriends. This was not on Raya’s 2023 bingo card.

As Raya glided down the stairs, she passed by both Noi and Virana conversing. Before she could leave the floor, Virana spoke to her.

“Ms. Heart!” the lawyer exclaimed. 

“What is it?” Raya asked anxiously.

“Please, just be careful,” Virana almost begged. Ah hell, that is so weird.

“Of course. I always am,” Raya told her confidently. With that, Raya turned around and dashed out of there.

The agent all but sprinted to her car. Once the car started, she began driving like a bat out of hell to get to her house. Because what on god’s green earth is happening right now?

When Raya got back home, she didn’t even bother locking her car before throwing her front door open.

Raya stood at the door for a moment, completely forgetting where she put the files. Then her brain started working again and she remembered that she shoved them underneath the dryer.

As Raya walked towards the kitchen, something made her pause. Is, is something burning?

Side tracked from her original mission, she found that the stove was turned on. That shouldn’t be possible. It wasn’t turned on this morning when she first got here and Raya’s breakfast was cereal straight from the bag. She did not touch the oven.

Tuk Tuk then made his entrance by running right by Raya and her fears quickly disappeared. Her big old dog probably accidentally knocked into the stove and turned it on. It has happened before. 

“Hey bud. Were you trying to make some dinner for yourself while I was gone? I should probably feed you anyways,” Raya smiled, giving him a light scratch on the ears. Before Raya could blink, she was pinned against the wall by someone wearing a mask.

It took a couple seconds before she realized that this masked man now had their hands wrapped around Raya’s throat, slowly squeezing the life right out of her.