#MRAs suck

[wild-at-mind]

Not to talk about MRA-lite spaces again but I'm going to need everyone to understand that in these spaces, the subtext of 'men don't get to talk about their problems' is ALWAYS 'and it is women's fault!'

[flutterbruttershy]

why are we entertaining the idea of misandry being a real issue for the love of dog i feel like im losing my mind

[discoursedamaged]

you notice how even when transandrophobes strain their brains to come up with One Nice Thing to say about trans men, it's always some version of "they are useful to me"? Like, "oh it's a shame all trans men are mras now, they'd be good for a fuck otherwise" "i used to know this cool trans man who helped me realise my own identity back in the day, too bad they all suck now" "my trans men friends say it's totally okay for me to say these things about their demographic because they're cool and normal". Never even about general contributions to culture, it's canonical that trans men are completely incapable of producing anything of value after all, not about activism, just what trans men have done or could do to specifically benefit them personally. It's really revealing of the actual motives behind opposing trans mens self-advocacy.

[seams-unusualbc]

but they synched their periods

BREAKFAST

[learn-how-to-love]

Something that stands out to me re: the whole PDB situation is that if things were reversed and this was a cis woman speaking over transfems and sucking up to transmascs extensively these folks would (rightly) conclude that this person is probably some sort of crypto-TERF chaser. But since it’s a cis man speaking over transmascs, even though he’s literally regurgitating TERF rhetoric AND MRA talking points, transandrophobes are falling all over themselves to defend him.

The double standard is atrocious and it’s so transparently because he’s a cis man. Like come on folks. And this isn’t even getting into the racism of it all but it’s also a huge component because why else would so many of these folks be completely fine with a cis white man telling tmoc what they do or don’t experience? It’s almost like transandrophobes haven’t actually done the work to deconstruct the patriarchal values they’ve absorbed from society and defer to the judgement of the “correct” kind of man.

[soup-mother]

an under recognised aspect of US Hollywood cultural export is just how fucking frequently "divorced dad (who sucks) will stop at nothing to get his kids back no matter how much he traumatises the kids in the process" shows up as a plot in movies. MRA divorced nation for real

[drdemonprince]

It’s also possible to pass as neither a man or a woman though. I dont call myselfTMA but I don’t use TME either because people see me as tall and hairy and effeminate. (No I am not saying all trans women are those things lol I am saying im not treated as a cisgender woman because of it.)

Like I live in Texas. I do agree with most of what you’re saying but people who disagree aren’t all MRA bros doing it to piss you off.

Also I do realize if I were a trans woman I might be taller or have a lower voice, those things make sense, but they don’t mean I pass as cis man OR cis woman

Oppression is so so so much more than just what strangers see of you when you walk down the street. That's a relatively small part of the experience structurally, legally, medically, relationally. If you are not a trans woman, you are TME, because you can enter into trans spaces and have it be known that you are not a trans woman, and people will view you differently based upon that knowledge. You can enter into women's spaces and make it be known that you are not a trans woman and people will treat you differently and grant you access to resources based on that. Legally, you are not a trans woman if you're not a trans woman. You're not going to be thrown in a men's prison. You can go to a queer party and not be accused of being a rapist. You're not as likely to get pedojacketed online. You can use Lex, you can go to women's spaces and trans/nonbinary spaces and not be seen as an anomaly. Your friends and family know that you are not a trans woman and so they don't use transmisogynistic tropes against you. You don't have to worry about a date finding out you are a trans woman in the middle of sex and turning violent against you. There are a lot of ways in which you do not experience what trans women experience. There are 5'2'' hairless trans women who experience structural transmisogyny and you don't. There's quite a few trans women like that. And I think if you cultivate respectful, mutually supportive deep relationships with trans women you know that it's not about height or hairiness, it's about hatred of trans women. Every person who is not a trans woman has a parachute out of the worst of structural transmisogyny, even if other aspects of your life are hard or suck or you experience gender based oppression.

[certifiedsexed]

I do feel kinda bad that such a terrible group ruined the term men's rights activist because society really is very sexist, and women aren't the only ones that effects.

Like in terms of all this I know who takes the brunt of it, but I wish there was language that could describe how sexism negatively affects men and masculine presenting people.

They didn't ruin it. The term itself sucks ass.

It's tasteless to rock up with a group of people, specifically people part of a largely oppressive class, advocating for more rights for them. We can't act like "oh no it was the bad MRAs that ruined it" when the matter of the fact is that it would've been bigoted even without their history and ideology to add to the mix.

Not even getting into, like, what rights are you going to argue that only men need. Literally what rights based on sexism are we going to argue only men need. The meeting is over in 2 seconds.

The only men oppressed by sexism/misogyny are trans men and "masculine presenting people" is not a category that even makes sense to be using here.

Not to mention, there are terms. Misogyny, the patriarchy, repression, homophobia, classism, bioessentialism, etc. Men don't need a special separate word to describe what's happening, there already a plethora (shit-ton) of words out there they can use.

They just have to be willing to get into feminism.

[professionalchaoticdumbass]

types of transfem gatherings

night life rave weed ketamine show at the cluuubbbbbbbb omg you HAVE to do it!!! everybody is white and skinny. music that gives you headache and random people might try to upskirt you and you basically cant be sober on entry if you want to have anything resembling a good time. will make you want to kill yourself for next three days after

queer nerd (tm) weekly meeting at the library or perhaps coffee shop :D bring your own warhammer, gunpla, and mtg because that is all we ever talk about. if you havent blown $2000 in the past week you are uninvited. 3:30 pm every wednesday

the suicidal friend group…. we went thru high school together but barely. we have no clue how to help each other because our lives all suck and we are all crabs in a bucket and we are going to be each others breaking point in like two years. please date each other out of pity to accelerate this to six months if you wish

local collection of friends, we are headed by a few 40yos and post regular invites to cool bdsm events! mostly chill. completely dead group chat except for the occasional selfie. oh youre interested in the events? yeahhhhhhhh sorry theyre all across the city at 12:30 am tomorrow evening and each one not happening after for another decade lol tough luck

we are an elevated group of marxist-leninist-transfeminist-perfectionists who offer a sisterhood of online community solidarity for all transgender women that have been deeply wronged by TME MRAs and- hold on is that a FACIAL HAIR with NO BOOBS??? eeewwww kill yourself disgusting male. we are ghosting you forever and ever and dont say a word to us til you get diy hrt all on your own (we are not saying how, you stupid tranny). love every trans woman you meet!!

[femceldogdyke]

its funny how a trans masc post abt experiencing misogyny gets a little bit of traction and alll of a sudden we need too shut up those mra transandrophobe truthing birthday boy theyfabs :)

edit: hey this isnt about trans women specifically its about anyone who denies transandrophobia. yes it sucks that SOME trans women are throwing us under the bus but that doesnt make them all evil!!!! shit i dont even think the ones that throw us under the bus are bad, just hurt and taking it out incorrectly.

[genderqueerdykes]

genuinely why do you believe in this transandrophobia bs. it’s MRA for trans people. We are affected by transphobia but misandry and "androphobia" aren’t real. We are not oppressed as a result of being men. plus most transandrobros always speak over transfems. - a tired transmasc

because it's real and i've faced it. friend, you do not need to hate yourself that bad. you do not have to self flagellate and pretend you do not experience a specific type of transphobia. you have been persuaded by rad fem pilled people to hate yourself and deny that you suffer a specific form of oppression. transandrophobia does exist, and pretending it doesn't for the approval of rad fems won't make you any safer or enjoy your trans manhood.

you're hurting other trans mascs & men by saying the oppression they face isn't real. reducing it to "just transphobia" is denying that those people are specifically being targeted because they are TRANS MEN and nothing else. you are hurting your trans brothers and siblings when you say this. you're hurting YOURSELF to say this. please be kinder to yourself. please stop telling yourself that what you're going through isn't real. you're not helping anyone except conservatives to deny that trans men & mascs face specific forms of oppression

i know you're tired, but sucking up to rad fems will not make your life as a transmasc easier. denying that you face a specific type of oppression is not only hurting you, but every other trans man and transmasc around you. if you care about other transmascs and trans men, stop denying their pain and suffering and telling them how to phrase it. you are legitimately hurting other people when you say this, why do you not care?

you do not care anywhere near as much about yourself and other trans men as you think you do, especially if you say "transandrobros". if you view other transmascs standing up for themselves as being "transandrobros", you really do not respect yourself or transmasculinity at all. and no, "most" trans men are not horrible to trans women. "most" trans men do not talk over trans women. trans men talking about their issues is not "talking over" trans women. please upgrade your opinion on other transmascs. you have a TON of internalized transandrophobia to get past. being a transmasc does not mean that you do not harbor internalized transandrophobia. because you clearly do as of right now.

hating transmascs and denying what we go through doesn't make transfems and trans women like you more, just so you're painfully aware of this. this kissing up to transfems and trans women by throwing transmascs and trans men under the bus is so old and tired. you're not getting transfem brownie points by being transandrophobic. all you're doing is hurting other people.

you don't have to self flagellate and pretend you don't have a specific struggle for the approval of people who are not transmascs or trans men. you're holding yourself and all of your siblings back. i'm a proud trans men's rights activist. we're something that's needed. we are not magically cis men who face no oppression after coming out as trans men. be kinder to yourself. this behavior is hurting trans men and sucking up to rad fems at the same time. why do you WANT to throw other transmascs under the bus? why do you WANT to shit talk other transmascs? it doesn't make transfems like you more.

i'm sorry you've been brainwashed into thinking that ALL mascs and men are inherently dangerous predators that can never be oppressed, but it's just not true. do better for yourself. do better for your siblings. do better for your family. kissing up to trans rad fems will not make them like you more. they're just using you as a tool to spread their propaganda. this is conservative behavior, and you're just plain wrong if you pretend that transandrophobia doesn't exist. being smug doesn't make you right.

[soup-mother]

"it sure would suck if we used their (transmisogynistic cyberstalkers) tactics against them" girl everyone would get even more transmisogynistic because people found out their favourite small bean MRA frequents kiwi farms

[tianasficrecs168]

Spideypool Fic Recs

A black dot • means it's a one-shot

A heart ♡ means it's focused on Sexy times (it's pure filth PWP)

Scarlett_starlett: “Are you sure you wanna’ love me?” (Wade/Peter) • Spider-Man is everything Peter Parker wishes he could be—witty, confident, loud, sassy, and sexy… This is no more apparent to him than when Deadpool walks past him without a second glance the first time they meet. It sucks, considering Peter Parker has an embarrassing crush on the ex-merc.

Dontcareajot: “Damage” (Wade/Peter) Peter Parker finds himself in a sticky situation and who should show up to rescue him but the infamous Deadpool? Now Peter feels indebted to the mercenary... And maybe weirdly charmed by him.

isaDanCurtisproduction: “Petey and Wade discuss the proper way to go about vigilantism (and maybe they fall in love too)” (Wade/Peter) Deadpool totally crashes Peter's lunch date with some left-overs Aunt May had inundated him with, and Peter is like "Woah, isn't that that murder guy?" and then it kind of spirals from there. And maybe when Peter first saw Deadpool, decked out with fuzzy panda gloves and enough guns to take down a small monarchy, he should have high-tailed it the other way, but where's the fun in that, right? Right???

Orphan_account: “You Big Disgrace” (Wade/Peter) a two-shot series Wade’s hanging by one leg from the firescape outside Peter’s seventh floor apartment, katanas sheathed on his back and a gun on each thigh - but he’s frozen like a deer in the headlights, as if Peter poses some sort of threat, standing like an idiot at the open window in sweatpants and no shirt, only a flashlight and a thin smattering of chest hair to defend himself.

ChuckleVoodoos: “Hot Cocoa and Heroes” (Wade/Peter) • When a strange hero breaks into his apartment to hole up for the night, Peter Parker is not pleased. And yet somehow he goes from swinging a baseball bat at the guy to sharing a mug of hot cocoa with him.

Zeropercent (orphan_account): “Clenched Teeth And Fluttering Eyes” (Wade/Peter) • The first time Peter sees Wade, really sees him, he doesn’t know what to think.

Cherryvanilla: “Wasn't looking for this” (Wade/Peter) a series, one of three When the Avengers had briefed him on Deadpool, they played up the Kills People for Money and Has No Real Morals angle and left out the Is Pretty Damn Funny and Charming in a Weird, Terrifying Sort of Way part. Or, five times they meet on rooftops plus one time they take it to the streets* (*with apologies to The Doobie Brothers).

        

Mokuyoubi: “One for the Books” (Wade/Peter) ♡ • And, like, there’s a million reasons NOT to do this, primary among them the whole it’s Deadpool thing and being in a library with the police outside, but Peter has a feeling this isn’t going to take very long, and they’ve been dancing around this forever. Wade gives a roll of his hips and Peter’s hands are suddenly working without his permission, rolling up Wade’s mask until the second his mouth is visible. MRA terrorists storm the library, and Peter is unreasonably jealous of how into his secret identity Deadpool seems to be.

Doctorestranged: “Dead Men Walking” (Wade/Peter) part of a series, one of four When a series of murders take place, Peter Parker goes undercover in Sister Margaret’s to get intel on Tony Stark’s prime suspect: Deadpool. Peter goes in hoping to get enough information so that Spider-Man can save the day, but like everything in Peter’s life, it becomes a bit more complicated than that and it soon becomes apparent that he might not be the best fit for the job.

Jilliancares: “Let me explain” (Wade/Peter) • Wade scoffs, shaking his head and elbowing Peter in the side. “Sure,” he says, sarcastic. “That’s why your spidey-sense doesn’t see me.” Peter’s on the verge of laughing, wanting to join Wade in his amusement, but he freezes. His entire body goes still. He finds himself staring at a roof three buildings over, not even looking at anything. Two blocks away, a car alarm finally shuts off. “I never told you that,” Peter says, the realization startling him. Or: Peter's starting to realize just how much Wade knows about him.

PrinceMalice: - “Break My Face” (Wade/Peter) • Deadpool died all the time. It was kind of a modus operandi with the mercenary. He was used to it. In a sick way, Peter was also used to it. The merc would take a bullet to the brain like a tic tac. No matter how gnarled or dismembered he became, Deadpool always pulled himself together, and it was normal. . Or four times Wade died saving Peter's life, and the one time Peter almost died saving his.

Riseofthefallenone: - “Puppy ex Machina” (Wade/Peter) A year after his divorce, Peter is trapped in a depressive cycle and still not quite over Mary Jane. When she shows up at his door, begging him to watch her dog for a week while she leaves town, he can’t really bring himself to say “no”. No one was expecting that little Pomeranian to turn his life around and help him realize that his friendship with Wade has been teetering on the edge of something more for a while.

[bdbdbdbdmn]

it sucks so bad when it sounds like someone's gonna be so right and insightful and go against the grain but then they're just so regular type wrong.

"transandrophobic trans women use MRA talking points but gender swapped as to not trigger their own dysphoria-" ok, I have also noticed this, i think this could have some potential if handled delicately... "-so trans men are fucking stupid for calling it transandrophobia because it's clearly Just Misogyny, you special snowflakes!" ah. well. now you're just not listening to trans men because erasing two thirds (the transphobia and androphobia) of the equation makes you feel better, and because you hate trans people and see transness as lesser than cisness.

"women are threatened by and dislike the masculinity and maleness of trans men-" yes, this is true "-but what they're not able to see is that's it. nothing else. the transphobia they experience isn't real, and the sexism against people who were afab and misogyny are entirely fake. Only misandry is real, you fucking idiots!" alrighty then my guy, i think you're misreading a lot of things.

cis men and women please stop trying to claim trans issues are about you challenge (gone wrong)

everyone stop acting all transphobia can be simplified into a conversation about cis people challenge (botched)

anyone care about trans men even just one time challenge (epic failure)

[communistkenobi]

having been here as long as i have its deeply sad watching this site slide from caring about feminism into mra, and so many ppl acting like thats ok because its transmascs doing it. i had a mutual who i was really fond of and gradually watched as he started slipping into beinga transandrobro and i couldnt believe this was hapening to someone who i thought was cool. im always trying to stay educated as a transmasc because i care so deeply about this comunity and about my transfem friends irl and i never want to turn into a bigot in any wayshape or form

honestly idk if this site has ever been anything other than like milquetoast liberal feminist (which is often transphobic, just in a different way than like terf/right wing transphobia), like I don’t necessarily want to sign onto the idea that tumblr was ever “good” on trans issues per se. I remember how big transmedicalism was on here in 2015 for example, “trans trenders” and handwringing about people identifying as stargender, there was a lot of #NotAllMen posting a few years back etc. it seems like transandrophobia is just the new watch word for this type of reactionary milieu.

However I think maybe what is being picked up on is the ingenuity of the term transandrophobia. it invites people to identify with and participate in a set of “class beliefs” about oppression using common shared language that they otherwise wouldn’t have, much the same way the banner of ‘parental rights’* encourages otherwise unengaged people to actively politically identify as “a concerned parent” and articulate their grievances through the lens of parental rights. Which is not to say that transmascs are being tricked into believing this shit, but that there is now this space available to vent their frustrations, whether because they just have an ax to grind with trans women or their life does legit suck because being trans is hard, but in a specifically reactionary way

*NOT MAKING AN EQUIVALENCY WITH THIS COMPARISON. USING IT FOR DEMONSTRATION PURPOSES ONLY

[velvetvexations]

it kinda annoys me how transmascs will go out of their fucking way to make sure they don’t step on the toes of transmisogyny when talking about transandrophobia, and then transfems repay that courtesy by referring to transandrophobia as stuff like “the bastard child of transphobia” (real quote)

Every other day I see my transmasc followers reblog things that made me personally roll my eyes into the back of my head and decide the OP was the most annoying person on Earth. And I regularly get anons that are like, well, there are all these complex reasons I think transradfems behave this way, because their situation is really bad and it confuses them and makes them scared and sad and lash out, and my response is always.

Yeah. But also they suck? They're bad people. Radfems are bad, horrible people who knowingly do bad, horrible things. They suck. And I regularly get worried my attitude towards trans radical feminism will make my followers decide I actually am riddled with internalized transmisogyny. No doubt I've lost several transmasc followers for being too aggressive, for the things I say being too potentially transmisogynyistic for them to be able to stand in good conscience, or even just generally too mean.

I keep repeating this over and over and over, but I have to keep saying "I learned about this because transmasc friends brought it to me so I could decide if it was bad or good for them" because no one ever listens.

They are so generous and eager to show up for trans women, and all they get is accusations of being MRAs who want to socially murder the people they constantly put first just because they try to talk about their own oppression too sometimes. Every day radfems like apricot-aligator tell thousands of high schoolers to call them slurs and never trust them or any other non-trans woman. It's so exhausting to watch. It feels like I'm having my soul exsanguinated.

I have to believe that despite everything Émile Zola was right when he said "If you shut up truth and bury it under the ground, it will but grow, and gather to itself such explosive power that the day it bursts through it will blow up everything in its way."