#MERRY CHRYSLER YALL!!!

[renderedthefox]

Merry Christmas, Michael.

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

cookie, cookie !!

baking cookies with suki :3

katsuki’s been hovering around you for about 6 minutes now.

you had decides on a whim you wanted to bake some cookies, and since the holidays were coming up, now was the perfect excuse to. you were soon joined in the dorm kitchen by your grouchy boyfriend, who had just come back from his morning run.

you explained you were in the mood for cookies and he responds with a grunt. but then he proceeds to stay in the kitchen, awkwardly standing around looking at the cupboards and utensils like this is the first time he stepped foot in a kitchen before.

he then proceeds to just hover around behind you, staring over your shoulder like a child waiting to see if the cookies were done yet. you found it cute at first, but that constant scowl and scrutinizing look on his face makes you feel like you’re doing something wrong, and frankly it’s making you a little nervous and baking cookies should not be nerve racking !

“would you stop doing that ? i know what i’m doing” you snap your head to squint at him and he stiffens like he’s been caught, like he was being even remotely close to sneaky to begin with, which he wasn’t.

“m’not doin’ anything” he mutters defensively, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his sweats. “just lookin’ atcha. m’i not allowed to ?” he leans in so his nose is almost touching yours, that stupid little handsome smirk on his lips as his eyes fixate themselves on your lips before looking back up. you gulp, then you place your hand on his face and push him away lightly “you’re distracting me” you mutter, feeling your face grow hotter. he chuckles to himself before turning on his heels and leaning again the countertop.

it’s quiet for a second before you feel like calling him out as payback for teasing you “ is there a reason you’re still here ? you wanna lick the batter or something?” you quip teasingly and you snort when his face morphs into one of disgust “hell no.” he scoffs, looking at you before looking down at the batter you’re currently mixing the shit out of, screw whoever broke the mixer. “how long are ya gonna keep mixing that ?” his eyebrow raises in question

“until it’s good” you huff, taking a break from mixing to keep your fingers from cramping up. then you suddenly get an idea

“oh, suki~” you sing turning to look at him. he eyes you suspiciously, crossing his bulky arms across his chest and grunting out a suspicious “what do you want ?”

“well~” you start walking towards him, proceeding to wrap your arms around his middle and give him your best puppy eyes. his doesn’t budge but he squints at you even harder and you can basically feel him cave already “what?” he urged again.

“since you’re oh, so strong and handsome, could you please do me a favor and mix the batter for me, my handsome boyfriend?” you give him your sweetest smile and he scoffs, “what the fuck does being handsome even have to do with it ?”he mumbles. pink dusts his cheeks and he looks away from you, already feeling his resolve crumbling at your shallow praise. he hates how easily he gives in to you sometimes. you squeeze at his waist, he grunts “thought you said i was distracting you.”

you’re pouting at him, he sees it from the corner of his eye and he’s this close to blowing up. “that was before. you’d be helping me out lots now if you did this for me” you’re relentless, standing on your tippy toes to lean in close to his face cus he won’t stop leaning further away from you.

he could very easily just shove you off if he wanted to, but you have a feeling he doesn’t want to. you know he doesn’t want to when he closes his eyes shut and his eyebrows furrow and then he groans, letting his hands fall at his sides limply before glaring at you. “gimme the damn bowl.” he growls. you squeal, pressing kisses all over his face and a finisher one right on the tip of his red scrunched up nose, he grunts at you but gives you a light pat to the back, rubbing his warm hands up and down your spine. then he pinches you, you giggle. “thank you ‘suki.” he responds with a “yeah, yeah whatever.”

he grabs the bowl from your hands starts mixing..hard. letting off his aggression on the bowl like it was at fault for his weak will to deny you. you smile to yourself and turn to the cupboard so you could grab the decorations and of course, the chocolate chips.

you watch for a bit as your boyfriend mixes away, you’re watching how his toned arms flex and how the muscle of his arms tightens and tenses up, more specifically. one thing’s for sure, you’ll never get tired of his arms. you quickly turn away before he can catch you staring and teases you again.

you jump when he calls for you not even a second later “s’this good?” he asks gruffly, leaning forwards to show you his work. you feel your face warm as you squeak out a curt “yeah, looks good !” before taking the bowl back from him and turning right back around to reach for the baking sheet you had prepped. he’s none the wiser for a moment before a knowing grin crosses his face, he shakes his head.

you place everything down on the counter and sigh happily to yourself, feeling accomplished. you walk over to your grumpy boyfriend and place a sweet kiss to his cheek “you’re the best.” he clicks his tongue, muttering out a “tell me something i don’t know.” while the pink on his cheeks grows darker, you let out a giggle.

“you done with this ?” he asks lifting the spatula in the air for you to see, you offer him a simple “mhm” and a smile before turning back to the task at hand and watch from the corner of your eye as he places the spatula in the sink.

not before taking a lick of the excess batter still on it.

your head shoots up and you stare, he stares back. then you let out a loud belly laugh and clutch your stomach “so you were just here to lick the batter !” katsuki only grunts. there’s a light smirk on his face as he licks away a speck of cookie dough batter off his lips. he shrugs, walks up to you and places his head on your shoulder.

“figured i deserve a little somethin’ for my hard work.” you roll your eyes. his hold on you tightens and he huffs, trying to get as comfortable as he can while still standing up as he simply watches work.

“hmm..” you decided to humor him “ you did help a lot, i think i can give you a little more" you look at him from your shoulder just in time to catch his eyebrow raise as he registers what you said, a smirk playing on his lips when he does. he readjusts his head to look you in the eyes.

“yeah ?”

“mhm..” you hum. his grip tightens, his hands feel warmer.

“whaddya have in mind then, huh ?” he whispers. he’s so close and you can smell your body wash, probably because he keeps stealing it but you keep quiet about that for now.

“i dunno..” you trail off shyly, your confidence melting away under his smoldering gaze. “would…a smooch suffice ?” you giggle. he chuckles to himself at your choice of words. he grabs the back of your head softly, pulling you in closer until your noses brush against each other and he gives you a half hearted little nose kiss, you giggle and he smiles a little wider.

“s’a good start” he concludes before pressing his lips to yours.

[samtalksmusic]

merry christmas!!!!!

[gummybugg]

Happy yall-idays from your favorite gelatinous bug who posts irregularly

[terrainofheartfelt]

Nothing like an 18 hr day to have me like “I love my bed. I love my bed so much”

[pokemonxhyperfixation]

Time for the (non-regional varient) Early route mons for the Touhou Pokemon Region!

Doodleouse

The Dowsing Pokemon

A Normal/Steel type.

Dex Entry: Doodleouse are a social species that have a facination with shiny objects. Due to this, they have been known to steal coins from people, leading to them being largely disliked. While Doodleouse live in large social groups, they only forage in groups of two. Part of Doodleouse's tail can rotate, pointing them in the direction of valuables.

Abilities: Pickup/Run Away

Hidden Ability: Adaptability.

(I'm cutting the stat concepts)

I decided to base the regional rodent on Nazrin. The steel typing may be kinda odd for a regional rodent, but it's based off Nazrin typically being a steel type in... most everything. The name comes from doodlebugging (which is like... an american term for dowsing for oil/treasure) and mouse. Doodleouse didn't originally have arms, but it looked wrong without them so they're here now.

Tokitweet

The Ibis Chick Pokemon

A Pure Flying Type.

Dex Entry: Tokitweet are a common species of bird pokemon found around the Gensokai region. They are notable for their curious nature, and seeming ability to actually read. Due to this, Tokitweet are actually known to hang around book stores and libraries. In place of a normal set of tail feathers, Tokitweet possess a third wing, which they use to stear their flight, allowing for superior air control.

Abilities: Early Bird/Limber

Hidden Ability: Regenerator.

So in Touhou roms, Tokiko is almost always a regional bird from what I can tell, so why break tradition? As you can kinda tell, Tokitweet had a design before the current one. I got the proportions all sorts of wrong so now we have this design I'm happy with. Reading up on Tokiko's wiki page to make her a pokemon taught me she is APPARENTLY similar-ish to a type of Ibis, so that's what this line is based on. It has regenerator because HALF it's forms in Puppet Dance have regenerator.

Glowva

The Glow Worm Pokemon

A pure Bug type.

Dex Entry: Glowva are a common sight in the forests of the Gensokai Region, especially at night. The bulb at the end of their body glows at all times, which they use to communicate with others of their kind. While this bulb may seem like it would lure in predators, most common bird pokemon don't target Glowva, since the bulb caries a powerful electric charge, which they can release when threatened.

Abilities: Illuminate

Hidden Ability: Compound Eyes.

So funny thing about Glowva, I designed this fakemon like 4ish years ago, as the regional bug for a region based on my home state Ohio (that is not a point of pride for me). I was actually working on that region BEFORE I got into Touhou, but I thought Glowva would be perfect for a Touhou Region's regional bug because something something Wriggle Nightbug. I already have the evolution drawn (hell, unlike everyone else, Glowva's evolution is in full color), but Imma not post it here for pacing or something.

Cloakubi

The Shady Pokemon

A pure Dark Type.

Dex Entry: Cloakubi are a strange species of Pokemon that like to hang around the towns of the Gensokai Region. For unknown reasons, they are known to seemingly listen in on people and "collect information." It's unknown why they display this behavior. It is widely believed that Cloakubi look the way they do in order to better facilitate their information collecting by mascarading as small children.

Abilities: Stakeout/Night Cloak (Boosts speed when hit by a resisted attack)

Hidden Ability: Steadfast

So Sekibanki is my second favorite character full stop, so I decied to make her a wierd early route dark type. It's kinda meant to be like Sekibanki from Puppet Dance... kinda. I do think the design might be a little too human like, but that's also kinda the point. It doesn't say it in the dex entry, but Cloakubi is just a floating head in a cloak. It doesn't actually have a body.

The early routes also have two regional varients: A dark/flying type regional Pidgey based on Mystia and a pure Fire type Purrloin based off Orin. I'm probably gonna try drawing them eventually, just haven't really felt drawing those two.

As per last post, lemme know if y'all wanna use these fuckers.

[love-me-satoru]

okay i’m literally in a shit load of pain and i don’t understand why at this point but merry christmas everyone! might drop another gojo fic? maybe love yall!

[fish-wifey]

[willowshimmer]

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

Remember I'll write my Christmas Flowershoes so keep an eye out

[tisforpterodactyl]

yea crying on ur birthday sucks but have u ever cried urself to sleep on christmas eve cause that shits a different kind of hurt like okay god that was personal

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 358

lil pencil doodle today bc im away for christmas eve but merry chrysler yall

[sorry-moots]

Inversion of Genesis But I Changed It

i literally only got back to this cuz i was bored yall, merry fucking chrysler also my beta reader flaked on me so no beta we die like... whoever the fuck idek characters featured: scaramouche, dottore, yvette 💖 cws: dottore is a bit creepy but when isn't he wc: 1,669

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Chapter Eight

The wool stockings, the starched blouse, the dense jacquard skirt, the layers of petticoats, everything you had been wearing lay cast aside on a loveseat. There was a sheen of sweat covering your body, but you felt too good to care. As you stared at yourself in the mirror, chest heaving and all, you could only think one thing…

Damn, I look good.

Before leaving Snezhnaya, you had tried to find something more suitable for the Sumeru’s tropical weather with no luck. There was no such thing as summer in Snezhnaya, so there was no reason to make or stock summer clothes.

Unfortunately, that meant walking around Port Ormos in clothes designed to brave the harshest winters in all of Teyvat. The stuffiness of your clothes combined with Sumeru’s humidity had had you fanning yourself as hot tears streamed down your face. It was a miracle that you had been able to spot the seamstress’s shop with your bleary eyes.

“Lord Scaramouche,” you had called out, panting. “We need to stop. The heat is too much.”

Now, a week later, you stood before the seamstress’s mirror in an entirely new outfit. You had worked up a sweat on the way there, but the new clothes were light and breathable and already cooling you down. You turn left and right to study the black leather pants– lambskin so you don’t develop bog bottom. The rest of the uniform consisted of a breezy white blouse overlaid with a black corset with purple laces. You had even changed your hair ribbons and the laces on your boots to match.

When you finally finish admiring yourself, you leave the dressing room only to be met with Scaramouche’s scowl.

He scoffs when he meets your eyes. “How much money did you waste on this?”

You’re still obsessing over the contrast between your boots and the new laces. “It wasn’t much compared to the cost of my usual attire.”

“Oh, I’m sure,” he snarks. “Dottore never skimps on his favorites.”

Ignoring his foul mood, you think aloud. “It’s a shame I can’t wear it in this heat. It fits perfectly, like it was tailored just for me. Wait a minute…”

Just as you’re about to toss yourself down that rabbit hole, Scaramouche diverts your attention with another retort. “Well if you want to wear it and suffocate, be my guest. At least you’ll die in the right colors. How come the accents are purple anyway? Are you color blind?” he asks with a smirk.

“Oh, I chose them because they match the colors you wear,” you respond, grinning widely.

The harbinger’s eyes widen and he quickly blurts out, “I wear red, too!” He then hides his face with his jingasa, not wanting you to realize it matches the color of the fabric.

*****

After dropping your clothes off at the hotel, you and Scaramouche rendezvoused with the other agents at the new office. It took about three hours to set up even with the lower ranked soldiers moving furniture. Every time Scaramouche asked for your opinion on the positioning of the cabinets and such, you told him they looked fine. The soldiers sighed in relief, especially when they were moving heavier items.

When everything is in place and your documents are sorted, Scaramouche announces, “Alright everything’s in order, we can go back to the hotel.”

The other agents start making their way to the exit, but you tell your boss to hold on as you go through your things. You produce a delicate ceramic pot with a single mourning flower, which you set on his desk.

You look back and flash him a smile. “Now, everything’s in order!"

While you pack up your things, he sits at his desk and admires the petals on the vibrant flower. There’s a funny feeling in his chest, probably from the humidity.

“Are you coming, sir?” you called out to him. 

There’s a resemblance for a split second. Both you and the flower are full of life, persistent even in the harshest conditions, and breathtakingly gorgeous.

“Yeah, I’m coming.”

*****

The silence of your room rings in your ears. You can think of a few ways to wind down before you go to sleep but you don’t feel like doing any of them. You haven’t even showered or put on your sleep clothes. You’ve just been staring at the ceiling thinking about Scaramouche.

Thinking about how he disappeared with her.

Yvette didn’t have much to do during the journey overseas. You had seen so little of her that you had forgotten she was even part of the harbinger’s retinue. Still, you don’t understand why she's staying in Scaramouche’s suite.

Are they an item..?

Before you can entertain that line of thinking, a frantic knocking comes from your door. You get up to answer it and silently admonish your guest for rapping their knuckles on the door again without waiting.

You’re met with a distressed Yvette. She’s signing at light speed, miming, and pointing but you can’t figure out what she wants. Suddenly, she brushes past you and grabs a pen.

You search your desk for something to write on but she grabs the first thing she sees, the book you’re currently reading.

“No!” you shout, your voice fraught with dismay. She doesn’t hear you. She’s deaf, she can’t hear anything.

The resignation sets in quickly. What’s done is done and, at the end of the day, it’s just a book. Not even your favorite book.

When she finishes writing, she tosses the pen on the desk and holds the book at eye level. The inside of the cover now reads:

Please come

Harbinger mad !!

With a grim look, you move the book so it’s no longer obstructing her view of your face and say, “Take me to him.”

She leads you through the corridors until you reach his room. You could hear his shouting all throughout the halls, but you were still jarred when Yvette opened the door.

Before you transferred, you had heard rumors of the Balladeer’s violence, but you had never bore witness to it firsthand. He stood in the center of the room with a Fatuus suspended in his grasp, his other hand balled into a fist.

“I told you to take your needles and fuck off!”

So, that’s what this is about. Though the man was too proud to admit it, you knew that the tests that Il Dottore administered took a great toll on his body. He was always pushing Scaramouche to his limits, seeing how much he could take before he gave out. It was only a matter of time before something like this happened.

You were frozen in thought, not sure what to do, when a familiar fragrance wafted in the air. Everything seemed to slow down as you realized what you needed to do. The soldier’s begging and pleading faded into the background as you made your way into the room. The only sound was your heart beating in time with your footfalls.

Your gaze travels from his sandals to the veil on his jingasa to his arm. Your eyes stay trained on his fist as your own hand moves towards it. Barely conscious of what you’re doing, you grab his hand and hold it to your chest.

“Your tea is getting cold, sir.”

All of the noise in the room comes back. The whimpers of the agent in Scaramouche’s grasp. The worried shushing of the Fatui in the room. Yvette nervously shifting her weight. Your steady breathing.

Every muscle in his body tensed before relaxing. A second later, the Fatuus was on the ground, hyperventilating but unscathed. You let go of his hand.

“Everyone out.”

You straightened and composed yourself, ready to take your leave as well when added, “Not you.”

Once the other operatives had scurried out, he seated himself and turned to you expectantly. It took a second, but you were able to deduce what he wanted. Soon, the two of you sat drinking tea in the silence, as if he hadn’t been about to kill a person just moments before.

He didn’t need to dismiss you. You knew once the tea ran out, he would have no further need for you.

The tea set wobbled on the tray as you made your exit, but only started to clatter when a new presence was made known.

“Thank you, my dear [Y/n],” the doctor patronized as he sidled up to you with a bemused smile. “You seem to have quite the hold on our Balladeer. I can’t imagine what would have happened to poor Henry had you not stepped in.”

You draw in a shaky breath to respond. “It is my pleasure to contribute to the Fatui’s cause.”

“Is that so? With your new attire, I would have thought you were trying to distance yourself from the organization,” Dottore remarked, his smile turning into a grin. “Not that it looks bad… Though, they did get your corset size off by a couple centimeters.”

As your earlier suspicions are confirmed, the lights flicker. You can’t know for certain, but your instincts tell you that you’ll be safe, like someone’s watching out for you.

Squaring your shoulders, you looked Dottore directly in his eyes. Or where they would be. “Thank you for bringing it to my attention, my lord. I will visit the tailor first thing in the morning and request that they alter it,” you responded evenly. “That said, I’ll need to retire early so I can do that without impeding my work. If there’s nothing else, I must bid you goodnight.”

Even in Sumeru’s warm weather, Dottore’s chuckle sends shivers down your spine. “I could think of a thing or two…” he starts and the lights flicker again. “...but I suppose I can wait.” 

With that, the light fixtures around him finally fizzled out and you went your separate ways. Once you were far enough, you let out a sigh of relief, thanking the Archons for watching over you.

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tags: @lacunaanonymoused, @dollpoetwriting

[dweebpheles]

Hey! Hankisa fans come get yalls juice. Merry Chrysler, Want chapter ten IS OUT

Here is a link to the fic!

[cringeassclusterofwirez]

merry chrysler! hope yall get what you want this year :]]]]]

[cartman-skrunkly]

merry chrysler yall

srry I didn’t wish yall a merry christmas yesterday but i was kinda stressed so i took a break from my phone and tried to make kandi bracelets while i listened to music (except i dont have string lol)

[myaimiztrue]

vines i need 2 quote more

road work ahead? uh, yeah, i sure hope it does!

hurricane katrina? more like hurricane tortilla!!

a potato flew around my room before you came

WHEN WILL YOU LEARN THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES?!?!?!?!??!?

i'm in me mum's car broom broom

i smell like beef

hey my name is trey i have a basketball game tomorrow well i'm a point guard i got shoe game

mother trucker dude that hurt like a buttcheek on a stick

i'm washing me and my clothes

i don't have enough money for chicken nugget

ha ha ha i do that

can i get a waffle? can i pls get a waffle?

there's only 1 race...the human race WHAT ABOUT NASCAR?

and they were roommates OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES

i wanna be a cowboy babeyy

do it for the vine

staaaahp! i coulda dropped mah croissant

oh hi thanks 4 checking in I'M STILL A PIECE OF GARBAGE

happy crimus..... it's crismun....merry crisis. merry chrysler

get to del taco. they got a new thing called freesha… free… freeshavaca-do

chris IS THAT A WEED?! no this is a crayon- I'M CALLING THE POLICE 911 whats ur emergency

two bros chillin in a hot tub 5 feet apart cuz they're not gay

so i'm sitting there BBQ SAUCE ON MY TITTIES

look at all those chickens

oh mah gawd i love chipotle

FUCK YA CHICKEN STRIPS

i didn't get no sleep cause of y'all, y'all not gone get no sleep cause of me

I WANT A CHURCH GIRL THAT GO TO CHURCH AND READ HER BIBLEEEE

mrs keisha? mrs keisha? oh my fucking god she fucking dead

how much did you pay for that taco? aight, yo, you know this boy got his free taco

so no head?

i am SHOOKETH

that is NOT correct

what are THOOOOOSEEEEEEE

anything for u beyonce

um i've never been to oovoo javer

WHAT THE FUCK IS UP KYLE

ah fuck i can't believe you've done this

there is only one thing worse than a rapist. A CHILD no

hi welcome to chili's

everybody say colorado!! I'M A GIRAFFE

i brought you frankincense. thank you. i brought you myrrh. thank you. mur-dur! JUDAS NO

ADAM!

ily bitch i aint never gonna stop loving you bitch

come get yall's juice

so you just gonna bring me a birthday gift on my birthday to my birthday party on my birthday with a birthday gift?

honey, you've got a big storm coming

i like turtles

deez nuts HA GOTTEM

iridocyclitis

oh i like ya accent where you from? i’m liberian. oh my bad. *whispering* i like your accent

go ahead and introduce yourselves. my name is michael with a B and i’ve been afraid of insects my entire- stop, stop, stop. where? hmm? where’s the B? there’s a bee?

dad, look, it’s the good kush this is the dollar store, how good can it be?

wow an avocadooooo thaaaanksss

THIS BITCH EMPTY YEET

jared, can you read number 23 for the class? no, i cannot what up i’m jared i'm 19 and i never fucking learned how to read

hey i'm a lesbian i thought you were american

ooooo he need some milk

it is wednesday my dudes AAAAAAAAA

give me your FUCKING MONEY

what the fuck richard

why are you running WHY ARE YOU RUNNING

whoever threw that paper, YOUR MOM'S A HOE

lebron james

i'm just cooking pizza *FUCKING FALLS*