#ME GETTING GOOD AT WRITING đ©đ©
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None Other Than Love
Word Count: 2,249
(Iâve been getting into more of Riverâs mind in my writing, since Iâve become quite good with Paytonâs. But Iâve seen a writing thing where a characterâs direct thoughts are put in parentheses, so I wanted to try that. Trigger warnings for mentions of suicide and separately, NSFW implications.)
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There are times where River, as put together as he appears, can fall victim to whatever voodoo magic Payton does to make people listen to him.
River has no doubt in his mind that Payton will succeed in his dream of presidency, because whatever he says, River would believe him.
Payton could tell River that the sky was green and that grass was blue and even though it would be upside down, no rebuttal would be given.
River likes (no, don't lie, loves) when Payton talks about anything, be it politics or something else.
But, what he loves (yes, loves) is the times where Payton is in between two things, between one thought, narrowing his eyes in search of the next thought to dive into it.
Payton has a lot of thoughts, on the world, on himself and his life.
Thoughts about River.
All of which that River himself wouldn't mind insight to.
(Pick his brain, go digging for gold in a diamond mine.)
It has taken time, not a lot of time admittedly, to get Payton to open up, to get his heavy burdens off his chest.
Their first proper conversation was a prime example. River spent five minutes with him and Payton let out his truth of an attempt of true happiness and it's strain.
River holds that day in his heart.
He would never want someone to cry, but Payton's tears had been held in and brushed away for years.
It was what he needed, to let things out.
To be real, a pained young man with many heavy burdens and troubles.
(Real... God, he's beautiful. Kiss him, go on, kiss him.)
River had done just that, asked if he could kiss Payton.
A small nod and it happened.
Short and sweet, never long enough, but good for a first.
Payton was blank, looking at River, wanting to say anything, but no words came.
River left with the idea of next time and Payton stayed on the bench, his cheeks red and tear-stained. (Oh God, oh God, oh God. I'm not- He- River, his eyes- my team, the dream... Alice... next time. Oh no, oh no. I take it back, no, I don't. What do I do?)
Next time does come, but there's a week before it.
A week before the following Mandarin lesson.
River sees Payton in the hallways at school and backstage before a debate, where he passes back and forth, looking over his note cards until the words are ingrained into his mind.
He made it a point to support Payton, he'd always sit in the front row.
But right now, he's backstage himself, wandering about until the debate starts.
Payton sees him and he looks jittery and at ease at the exact same time. (Proper and sharply dressed, too. In a tailored jacket. Awfully handsome.)
The debate is something about the school's physical education curriculum, something Payton really doesn't care about himself, but he has to.
He has to care about the jocks (Tall and strong, handsome. No, don't think that; why are his eyes so blue? And so- quit that) and the theatre kids and the outliers who don't fit into any specific group, but who all matter nonetheless.
River barely says, "Hey," and he's having to think quick.
Keep Payton steady.
Steady, four breaths in, four breaths out.
This isn't the first time they've done this breathing exercise, more like the second or third.
Still new, but it helps Payton. That's all River wants.
It works, Payton opens his eyes and River has taken a step away from him, smiling and wishing him good luck.
Payton is calmer now, confident in himself.
A few days until next time. (Pretty blue eyes, pretty blue... I said quit that!)
Astrid follows him in the library a day later, waiting in a sense.
She's smart like Payton, calculated, she knows how to get to a person.
It's abrupt when Payton sees her, he startles and braces himself for the worst.
She knows of the kiss, straight to the point.
She wants in, she wants a part of whatever Payton and River have.
Oh.
Astrid wants both of them.
Wants them, wants what they have.
Payton nods his head,
"Okay." (River Barkley and my arch-nemesis, both in bed. River... quite handsome... Oh, strike me down right now...)
River is quite happy, he'll get to see Payton before next time.
Two times after school as opposed to one.
All three of them are nervous, all in the hotel room, swaying with Everclear in their systems.
Before long, one shirt, then another, then another land on the carpeted floor and River looks at Payton for a solid eight seconds, not saying a word.
(Awfully handsome in a suit, but he's stunning like this. Incredible, yeah that works. Good lord, I think I might die.)
Payton looks back at River and his mind is short-circuiting in the best way possible. There's so much he could say, but nothing coherent comes into his head.
(Go on, go on. He's beautiful. Don't cry, come on now. Save that for tears of joy when everything is cleaned up and packed away.)
Things never get messy, at least in a literal sense.
This is extremely messy, but they all end up virtually where they started.
River drives Astrid home after a long talk in the hotel bathroom.
He can't think of anything, though his heart aches and aches and aches.
Payton sits in the hotel room, crying.
The tears comes, not of joy at all.
His heart sinks deep, deep down into his chest.
By the time next time comes, the space and tension between them is drastically different than when River first showed up at the Hobart residence.
A lot can change in a week.
They trudge on through the lesson and they don't talk about what has happened in the last couple days.
River wants to talk about it, but Payton is rigid and swimming around in his sea of thoughts. (You drive me insane, I'd like you to stop. How do we resolve this?)
The answer to resolve the tension becomes clear, but the clarity takes a few more lessons to settle in.
For a few lessons, three or four, they focus well; until the lesson happens in River's bedroom as opposed to Payton's.
Payton doesn't love River (liar), but he'll be damned if he doesn't think about him an awful lot.
Especially now, he wants to see that look on his face again, the look of admiration and excitement from Astrid's stupid little idea, repeated under completely different circumstances.
Payton takes matters into his own hands.
Though, all he can do is look at River and the gears in his head turn around and around.
But eventually, he gets his point across; he kisses River once, then twice, then everything falls together.
And Payton gets what he wants, but it's also what River wants. What he thinks about, but doesnât want to push anything.
Payton isn't pushing him, one of them had to say something eventually, or the tension would suffocate both of them.
They see each other bare-chested once more, but now it's just them.
It's feels huge, like this is a whole thing of it's own now.
It is, it's a thing now; Payton will have to accept that. Even if they don't say anything, this will change the course of everything.
But Payton can worry about a changed course later. River is looking at him again, beaming and so in love.
Incredible, River calls him. Oh my God, incredible.
(Poseidon-slash-Superman himself thinks I'm incredible. Strong, so strong. Pretty blue eyes, like diamonds. Yes, yes, pretty blue eyes.)
That evening folds into the night, moonlight peering in through the windows.
Love.
A lot of it, whether Payton will admit it out loud or not.
River sure will, he says it many times and Payton can't say it back, but he loves hearing it.
(He loves me, yes. Good. Say it again, please oh please, say it again!)
Maybe he'll be able to say it back, maybe he won't; River won't push him either way.
Though, Payton saying it would be quite nice. (I'd cry, not bawl-my-eyes-out cry, but tears would fall if Payton Hobart ever said those three words.)
The night wraps around to morning and they're both tired, sleeping soundly.
Out of habit, Payton wakes up early. Well, very late for his standards; the clock by River's bed says that it's a few minutes before nine o' clock.
But Payton can't move out of bed, River has a tight hold of him. Secure, not letting him go.
He shifts and River shifts with him in his sleep, Payton can see him now.
He can see how he's all out of wack, messy. His hair sticking out all over the place, curls going one way, then the opposite way.
Down his chest are small crimson love bites. (Good, tonight will stick with him for a while. Make Astrid Sloan very jealous.)
For a long while, all Payton can do is stare at River and listen to him snore lightly, looking over the pattern of marks he'd left behind.
Payton, even in the midst of passion, is smart.
Everything River owns will cover them up; he can see them in the mirror when he dresses himself before school.
He can watch the fade, slowly, as bruises do.
Eventually, River wakes up and he's disoriented at first, but he instinctively holds Payton a bit closer and wakes up little by little.
Payton has his own bruises to watch fade, though they're scattered down by his hips, so he can make the choice to step back from the mirror and watch them fade, or stand close to it, where he can see himself from the waist-up only.
River was nice in that way, not even thinking about it. But the thought lingered in his mind, to do what he wants or to hold off. (Payton is put-together, but he can be unraveled, too. He'll remember tonight, I hope he doesn't regret anything.)
Evenings like last night are rare from then on, but they happen a handful of times.
Payton is nervous the first time or two, insecure of himself in every aspect, but he feels secure and finds his confident footing.
He can't feel bad about his short stature or slim frame when River looks at him the way he does.
For a while, things are good. Not always, for there are times where Payton feels extreme guilt for what he does with River.
He feels guilt for thinking about River in the way he should devote himself to Alice.
His heart is torn and River is aware; he understands it himself.
Payton can push River away some days.
Cancel their tutoring sessions and avoid him, so he can focus.
It's cruel, Payton knows it's cruel, but he had a dream. (Don't get in the way, don't get in the way.)
Unfortunately, come senior year, River does get in the way.
He runs for the high school election, which earns him a piece of Payton's mind, though not how he'd like it.
(Quit yelling, please- You'll out me- us? Living a lie?)
Payton is a hypocrite in a sense. He represses his own feelings so deeply, yet wants to lay them out in front of the entire student body.
The anger fizzles inside of Payton more and more as the campaign goes on.
Those evenings and nights under the moonlight become quick and feverish, angry with no way to properly express it.
River takes the expression and, partly in spite, to make Payton short-circuit and pause, he'll say those damned three words.
Even angry, Payton's mind gets tickled by the words; halfway pleased by them and halfway disgusted by them. (He loves me, why? Stop it, stop it. You're lying, River. You don't love me.)
The day River makes his pick for VP is his last day.
The last day of too much, too much everything. Too much being torn by a left and a right, North and South, a boy and a girl.
River stands out on the balcony, the sun is starting to set. The house is quiet, he can hear the ocean and seagulls in the distance.
Though, he hears Payton yelling for him, running up the stairs. (Payton? Payton... I won't be alone. Thank you.)
Payton pushes the door open and he's off, talking fast and loud.
River tells him to calm down.
(Calm down? Who do you think you are? Stupid, stupid, your bitch of a girlfriend. Taking my dream! I hate-)
River's hand is on his cheek, he looks like he might cry.
It makes all thoughts in Payton's mind stop for a short moment.
God, he can't bring himself to say the other three words either.
River steps away from him and Payton talks, though his voice is quieter.
He looks at Payton, he really did love him.
(I'm sorry, I love you. I wish you luck. Goodbye.)
They look at each other and then, it happens. Quick and loud.
Bang!
Payton stares, he stares hard at River, down on the ground.
(Oh God, oh God. River- why? Please, no, no! God, please...)
The sun sets and Payton's mind goes a mile a minute. (Stupid, stupid. I'm stupid- moronic- blind. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you. I'm sorryâŠ)
#the politician#the politician netflix#the politician fics#payton and river#hobarkley#angst#ME GETTING GOOD AT WRITING đ©đ©#itâs good#Iâm proud#I hope it makes sense
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me stubbornly forcing myself to drink green tea and rest from my THIRD COLD THIS MONTH
#i am so fucking tired of being ill#is it not enough that i have a chronic illness and chronic pain condition all the time anyway???#ughhh#i'm grateful because i at least managed to get to (most) of the gigs i wanted to this month#but other than that i've literally just been stuck in bed unable to do anything and my brain is starting to melt with boredom#idk how i can still not be well enough to write or absorb myself in reading a good book or fanfic or even be on here properly#but my brain feels like MUSH and it's so frustrating#i miss my little four walls men so much đ©#i miss being able to see the sky and see my friends and taste the food i eat#sorry i know i'm complaining#i just needed to vent for a moment#it's been such a shit few months anyway and i was already in a really rough spot with my mental/physical health for a number of reasons#so this just feels like the last straw#universe please let me feel a little better soon#i have things i want to do and people i want to talk to and fics i want to write#oh how nice it must be to live in a body that isn't constantly impaired in some way đ€Šââïž#lulu posts
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ARMYs are really just burnt out and I donât think the rapid fire pace of releases has helped anything. Itâs amazing as a fan to get all this music, but the expectation to chart everything I think is unrealistic and kind of overwhelming. People just donât have that kind of time, energy, or money to go all out for every comeback when they happen every other month, sometimes several in a single month. It especially doesnât help if ARMYs arenât feeling the song, and I donât think theyâve felt quite a bit of CH2 music.
I have longer thoughts on all this, but I just have so much annoyance towards some chart ARMYs and their unrealistic expectations and their refusal to acknowledge that the current organized fandom streaming power isnât what they think it is. Another big wave of HL victimization (but sometimes TH is also included??) from ARMYs and it just opened the doors for so much resentment and hatred to be thrown towards jkk but especially Jimin. It was really disturbing to go and block these people & find I had 5-10+ moots following each time. Itâs really out of control.
Iâm just tired of this RL discourse while they ignore the twenty elephants in the room that explain why the streams are where they are (and no itâs not because âARMYS hate RLâ.). Instead they just throw these tantrums that further divide an already deteriorating and toxic fandom. I donât know what it will take for them to understand that a fandom that doubled with Dynamite is going to prefer pop music, and that the majority of ARMYs are in fact not zombie streamers but fans who casually listen to the music that appeals to them. Not to mention the fact that a lot of ARMYs arenât even active right now, so many of them have been dropping off and waiting for BTS to return as a group.
It really just keeps getting worse and worse in ARMY spaces. Iâm pretty sure active ARMYs are about 90% diet solos at this point. Itâs extremely messed up what a lot of them can get away with saying and not get canceled or called out for. Itâs also just this hyper-fixation on drama, shooter accounts, NewJeanâs, MHJ, raging against whatever fandom approved villain of the month, trending pointless hashtags for random reasons, and then being shady and resentful because of these arbitrary goals they set that are often influenced by using Jimin as a goalpost.
#discourse#just a little fandom rant#wanted to be present for NJs comeback#but yeahhhhh#definitely shouldnât have come back to this side of the fandom#theyâre genuinely intolerable sometimes#most of the time actually#theyâre really going to chase all the good people out#maybe they already have#and some of the nasty stuff i was seeing about JM yesterday was unreal#ARMYs are entirely to blame for the solo and diet problem too btw#just like they are with tkkrs#but i wont get into all that rn#alright sorry#back to ignoring the fandom mess#ahdgljhadslghsdg#just remembered something else i read that pissed me off#but im going to stop myself đ©#vent series#wait actually one last point in my tags#but RL streams arent even that low#its because they lost sight of what our normal streams ACTUALLY look like#because theyre comparing everyone to jkk#and specifically jm#even though they pretend theyre not pitting the members against each other#like how on earth can you complain about THs streams??#its neglect if any member is lower than JM??#im gonna write another post about JM being the goalpost one day lol
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Iâm not deep enough in the yttd fandom to really know if this is a controversial take to have but. I think soushin is interesting. I donât think this in a âomg wow theyâre soooo in love and I want them to be togetherâ way, not at all lol. But I think to act like itâs impossible to see a romantic/sexual aspect of their relationship is really fucking stupid. I try to refrain from acting like thereâs a solid truth to their relationship cuz the game isnât finished yet so thereâs always the likelihood that weâll get more information later, but the thing that always gets me is when ai shin mentions that hiyori claimed to be an older student at his school but he later learned that wasnât true. It sounds so eerily like a grooming story and the way we see human shin retreating into himself In reaction to that hits really hard, like heâs embarrassed it ever happened
Then thereâs stuff like the detail that hiyori would always take pictures of shin without consent and would hang them up, or the fact that hiyori kept a personal shin ai for himself that he had control over, or the way that maple is supposed to parallel shin. It all just sounds like they had a relationship that blurred the lines a lot in a way that was very uncomfortable for shin. Moments like the shin ai sobbing and Hiyori saying âno donât be like that show me your cool side shin!â and shin reacting to that, itâs like hiyori is trying to praise shin while hurting him. Seems way too much like a common occurrence
I think also (but maybe im just projecting) that shin is pretty queer coded in a lot of ways (hot springs scene, soft-natured personality that he tries to smother, his relationship with hiyori paralleling a romantic one, etc) and I think this plays into his relationship with hiyori a lot. Because of gender roles and toxic masculinity bullshit, i really doubt shins soft personality was allowed to fly under the radar for most people, so he was isolated a lot. Hiyori probably made him feel special at first with the way he seemed to like this about shin, but it becomes pretty clear that hiyori loves to fawn over shin and treat him like a cute baby and really only loves shins personality cuz he sees it as easy to take advantage of. I think itâs really easy to imagine a scenario where shin is a closeted teenager who finally has someone he feels he can confide in and hiyori blurs the lines between romantic and platonic a lot and shin latches onto this because he wants to feel like he can be loved by another boy and thinks this is his only shot. Itâs way too common and all the pieces just fit right into place, you know? And Iâm aware of the line where shin says hiyori is like an older brother to him but imo I think these two things can actually perfectly coexist cuz again, theres blurring of lines going on cuz this is an abusive relationship and feelings are being toyed with constantly
Basically all this to say, I very much think itâs likely that there was a romantic and sexual aspect to this relationship going on. I wouldnât say they were labeling themselves as boyfriends or anything, more like it was a vague mess that hiyori refused to elaborate on. I donât ship these two cuz I think itâs pretty clear shin wants out of this relationship, but I think inherently being mad someone wants to explore the idea of them having this kinda relationship is really ignorant and is only gonna result in only shallow ass takes about abusive relationships being allowed
#yttd#shin tsukimi#sou hiyori#i feel like ive made myself way too clear here lol i just want to speak my truth đ©#maybe no one cares but just from what ive seen ppl have been like IF YOU MAKE ANYTHING RESEMBLING ROMANCE FOR THESE TWO YOURE EVILLLL#like its annoying when ppl make completely ooc shit trying to make this pairing cute cuz idk they want boys to kiss#but to act like no one can pick up on something more to their relationship like this is fucking stupid#im not saying their relationship couldnt be strictly platonic and still abusive cuz thats not true at all#im just saying hey. lets ease up a bit and allow some damn nuance#side note i hate when ppl write hiyori as comically evil in the relationship like yeah hes creepy as fuck but like#these two were close enough to be practically living together and shin kept his scarf and everything#and this is the game arguing everyone is capable of good so like. i think hiyori had normal moments too lol#ldk it just irks me when ppl write abuse as like some black and white perfect victim/evil abuser shit cuz thats unrealistic and boring#and we dont know everything that went down between these two but sometimes shin is getting brutalized a lil too much in these fics#maybe im wrong maybe he was getting strapped to the electric chair every night lol
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you know how sometimes you will randomly unlock a memory that doesn't actually mean much. anyway i just now remembered one of those. for context when i was. i wanna say 15. i nearly got into this fancy boarding school for arts and science we have here. and this memory was from the final stage of entry. i was "auditioning" for humanities and for art. and in art they had us draw this combination of objects in front of us with pencils. and they gave us an hour i think? but i finished in 30 minutes (the finisherrrrr). and mind you it was a very decent drawing. a bit too dark but still p accurate. but the teacher there saw that i finished early and went "...try to correct stuff" and i asked what and he said "find them yourself" which only caused me to ruin that drawing bc i tried correcting the dark areas smh. anyway all this was to unlock another part of my backstory for you guys, i was actually an artist before, at a relatively high level for my age back then even. yeah i dunno what went wrong in the years since either
#also a writer as you can guess from me getting into humanities too#the reason i didn't get into the school was bc i couldn't handle the boarding school aspect of it đ©#but i remember in the acceptance process into art they really liked my stuff. and writing? even more so#damn fr what went wrong since...........#(tbf. my art wasn't very very good. but i think still decent for someone my age back then who never learned it)#(i don't remember when i stopped doing it. i mean i never fully did but i like when i started doing it way less.)#(probably when i dropped out lol many of my drawings in 10th grade for example were done during class)#(speaking of i did get into a different art school! for troubledâąïž kids tho :P)#(i was in theater but other students and teachers told me i could've been in music and art there too had i wanted that. sigh)#(man where did all that go....... i mean i do have theater and music left but still........)#ok reminiscing of the past over. if you read all this i'm sorry. hope you enjoyed another chapter of my backstory tho
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I hate endings whether itâs reading, writing or watching but Iâm determined to finish my Eris series (the Angel au) đ€ and Rhys one đ€đ€
#I get a sense of completion that feels good when I finish things#but itâs the actual working to finish that gets to me đ©#I just need to sit my ass down and write#they both only have 1-2 parts left#and then I wonât feel so guilty working on my new Eris fic and other one shots#hope rambles
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Replaying Shadow of the Colossus again for the first time in an astounding SIX YEARS somehow??? And I'm 10 colossi down, 6 to go, and AUGH it just feels like home being back I love this game so much đ„°đ„°đ„°
#fought dirge this morning and FUCK that guy scares me to this day he's scared me since the ps2 days as a kid#he gets right up in uour face and you have to fight him off agro's back while she runs around the arena and you have to shoot him in the#eyes with your bow and his fuckin majora's mask moon eyes right in your face chasing after you from behind slithering through the sand đ#but I had a really good run of the fight so it's fiiiiine lol#and man that world just feels like home it's so beautiful and the vibes are immaculate and the MUSIC đ©#the ost is simply phenomenal I put it on while I'm writing all the time#I'm so happy to be back I have no idea how I hadnât played this game since 2018 like I saw the save data on my ps4 when I restarted#and I literally died that's insane!! SoTC is one of my favorite games of all time how could that time have slipped me by?????#I think I tricked myself into thinking it hadnât been that long because of how many times I've rewatched my favorite playthroughs of it#but could not recommend this game enough if you haven't played it it's amazing and there's truly nothing like it in this world â€#aberooski games#shadow of the colossus
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13 and 30? :D
Is there a trope you wouldnât write if it was the last trope on earth?
Alternate Universe. I feel like it's already challenging to keep characters in character as they're presented in media. So not only would I have to come up with some engaging plot to drop some pre-existing characters in, but also try to keep the in character enough to make whoevers reading think "Yeah blank would totally be like this if they were in this type of universe". If they sway too far from their in-universe counterparts , its like might as well create your original story at that point (at least imo) đ€«.
Tell us an idea for a longfic you want to write in the future.
A longfic!??!! You're asking the impossible from me. It's already a challenge writing a decent 4k oneshot đ€Łđ€Ł and at least when I think of longfics, I think multi-chapter fics and oh gosh, thinking of an overarching plot and spanning it for so many chapters đł. No ideas in the near future, at least for me, but I think it would be so fun to try my hand at rewriting a season for a show or movie, which would probably actually help with those prints maybe now that I'm thinking about it. đ€
#Another addition I think AUs work really well with certain fandoms and others not so very much#granted its hard to get into them for me in the first place and I really do try cause I've seen snippets of some and its so good but#getting from A to B cause context is key is hard đ„Č#like I can easily open a South Park au fic and I can read all that no problem but like others....not so much.#some people write AUs so well but I wouldn't be one of them tbh that's for sure đ€Łđ€Łđ€Ł#omg now that I'm thinking about fic rewrites I know its been awhile since I've read Winx Club ones and thers probably been so many updates#So many people write them so well and you're able to see that subtle difference from how they acted from ch 1 to ch 20 like you're actually#watching it again and its just with words đ©đđŸ (swear fics be better than the shows/movie)#That and I'm like really a sucker for everyone's interpretation or analysis for any and everything#I could never lmao...but I will read it all day đđ#Thanks for the ask Spockify!! đ„°#Key Answers
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⥠Max "If It Weren't For The Baby" Verstappen | MV1
NEFERASKINGDOM
Summary: Max and George show no signs of stopping anytime soon and poor y/n is stuck between a rock and a hard place. but soon things escalate when Max accidentally opens his big mouth.
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y/n_russell posted:
y/n_russell: Habibi come to Abu Dhabiâš
Comments:
user: SHEâS BACK, EVERYBODY STAY CALM!!! đ„đ„đ„ user: MOTHER RETURNED TO THE GRID AND IT SHOWS. user: Abu Dhabi isnât ready for her!! đ user: Not to be messy, but is that a bump or just the angle? đ
user: Delete this before you embarrass yourself further. đ user: You do realize thatâs body-shaming, right? Yikes. user: Maybe itâs just the dress, maybe itâs none of our business. Either wayâdonât. user: Imagine logging onto the internet just to get ratioâd in the comments. Couldnât be me.
georgerussell63: Wow. 2 whole photo in front of Lewisâs garage? Feeling betrayed right now.
y/n_russell: omg george, do you want me to write "george is my favorite" on my forehead or something? relax. georgerussell63: Iâm just saying, whereâs the support? y/n_russell: maybe if your garage didnât feel like the waiting room at a dentistâs office, Iâd consider it. georgerussell63: Thatâs because weâre professional. y/n_russell: nah, itâs because you have the personality of unseasoned chicken. user: đđđ SHE CAME FOR HIS LIFE.
user: MAX. LIKED. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN.
user: Not Max creeping in the shadows like that. George, sweetie, you seeing this? user: Netflix doesnât even need to make a script this season. The showâs writing itself.
landonorris: MOTHER.
y/n_russell: đȘđȘđȘ user: The knives are out. Lando, RUN.
lewishamilton: Always great to have you around. Thanks for showing up and supporting me this weekend. Much love â€ïž
y/n_russell: Wouldnât miss it for the world, you know Iâm rooting for you Lew! Big things ahead đȘđœ
f1teaspill posted:
f1teaspill: Okay, F1 fans, weâve got a hot one for you! Max Verstappen and George Russellâs sister, Y/n, were spotted on a hotel balcony together, and itâs seriously got people talking. đ Y/n was supposed to be at a totally different hotel with George, so why is she with Maxâespecially with all the drama going down between them? đ€
Is there something going on between these two? Or is Y/n just making it clear that sheâs Team Max in this ongoing feud? You know weâll be watching this one unfold closely... đ„
Comments:
user: Yooo, whatâs going on here?! Y/n is in Maxâs hotel?? đł
user: Is this a secret relationship or is Y/n just picking sides? I need answers!! đŹ
user: So Y/n's team Max now? This is messy. đ
user: Max and Y/n are lowkey dating and no oneâs telling us?! I need the receipts ASAP. đ©đ„
user: Sis really out here with Max?? I canât believe this. George is gonna flip. đŹ
user: Okay, but like... is she betraying George by cozying up with Max right now? Or is she just done with the drama? đ
user: Nah, this canât be real. Sheâs out here looking all comfy with Max while George is literally her brother?? What kind of betrayal is this? đ±
user: Is this the kind of power move weâre witnessing?? Y/n dropping George for Max?? đ€Żđ„
user: Ok, but lowkey, I ship them so hard. Max and Y/n would make the hottest couple. đ„đ„
user: No, fr. Max and Y/n are EVERYTHING. They look so good together, Iâm lowkey obsessed. đđ user: Can we just take a minute to appreciate how theyâre literally radiating chemistry? I donât care if theyâre not datingâthey should be. đ©đ
user: The way sheâs just chilling with Max tho... George must be somewhere crying right now. đ€Łđ
f1teaspill posted:
f1teaspill: âIf it werenât for the baby.â Three words that sent the paddock and the internet into absolute mayham today after Max Verstappen dropped the bomb during an interview. đ¶đŁ
Fans are already in detective mode, dissecting every second of this wild moment. Whose baby? Is Max a secret dad? And what does George Russell have anything to do with it?
Interview Transcript:
Journalist: Max, earlier this week George Russell referred to you as a âbullyâ in his recent comments. Do you have any thoughts on that?
Max: (chuckles awkwardly) Well, you know, George always has something to say. Iâm not going to get into it.
Journalist: But do you think his characterization of you is fair?
Max: (sighs) Look, Iâm just here to race. Iâm not interested in petty drama.
Journalist: It doesnât seem like George is letting it go anytime soon. Are you planning to address it with him directly?
Max: (visibly annoyed) I really donât see the point inâ
Journalist: But isnât it important to clear the air, especially since the tension is so public now?
Max: (snapping) If it werenât for the baby, I wouldnât even bother trying to make peace with him!
(A beat of stunned silence. Maxâs eyes widen in realization.)
Journalist: The⊠baby? What baby? Max, can you clarifyâ
(Max mutters something under his breath and walks off, leaving the journalist baffled.)
Comments:
user: BABY???? HELLO? MAX, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.
user: What baby, Max?! WHOSE BABY?! I havenât been this confused since Abu Dhabi 2021.
user: Can someone please check if Max even knows what he said? He looked so panicked when he walked off.
user: âIf it werenât for the babyâ??? Sir, weâre not in Panem; calm down.
user: Peeta Verstappen has entered the chat. Someone hand him a loaf of bread. user: Peeta Mellark walked so Max Verstappen could run user: I just KNOW someoneâs editing Max into a Peeta scene as we speak. Canât wait.
user: Okay but what baby would involve George? George is childless?
user: Guys, hear me out: What if Max is secretly dating Georgeâs sister? Thatâs the ONLY way a baby ties them together. user: Nah, thereâs no way. George wouldâve punched Max into next week already. user: Okay but think about it. Max. Georgeâs sister. A baby. Uncle George. THIS IS LORE. user: Iâm just saying, Georgeâs sister has been looking very glow-y lately⊠đ user: Not a theory, just facts: Max is babytrapping George into a truce. đ user: Wait... isnât Georgeâs sister in Abu Dhabi right now?? đ user: omg and they were seen together on his hotel balcony jskjsk user: IâM SCREAMING. THIS THEORY IS TOO GOOD. user: Max... the man, the myth, the secret brother-in-law.
user: F1 fandom today: trying to figure out if Max has a secret family or if weâre all just collectively hallucinating.
user: Bro, if this is true, Netflix better dedicate a whole episode to Uncle George. user: âIf it werenât for the babyâ is my villain origin story now.
user: GUYS. What if Max meant baby as in, like, his cat or something? Weâre spiraling.
user: Okay but why would George care about Maxâs cat?! Use your brain. user: Honestly, the only thing that makes sense is Max dating Georgeâs sister. Uncle George confirmed. Case closed.
user: Yâall, the way I will actually SCREAM if Max and Georgeâs sister are together. This is better than any race drama.
user: Max Verstappen?? A baby daddy?? In THIS economy??
user: Everyoneâs fighting over the baby, but Iâm just here wondering how Christian Horner is gonna spin this in interviews.
user: Plot twist: The baby is Christian Hornerâs with Toto đ
user: STOP. This is the most chaotic F1 season ever, and I love it.
Taglist: @ilovechickenwings @spooky-librarian-ghost @diaryofarandomkid @rd14 @hc-dutch @tremendousstarlighttragedy @grussellsprout @dannyespinosa06 @awritingtree @shelbyteller @diorbrxtz @96mcobo
#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x y/n#max verstappen x you#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fanfic#mv1 x reader#mv1 x you#mv1 x y/n#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula one x y/n#formula one x you#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 x you#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1 x y/n#formula 1 x oc#formula 1 x you#f1 x oc#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#formula one smau#formula one fanfiction#formula 1 fic#george russell x reader#george russell x you
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Fucked up how happy I get whenever I make content of Shinjiro Aragaki being actually loved and getting to heal and learning to love the little things in life and getting to express himself. Whatâs up with that
#persona#shinjiro aragaki#hes the only one i really respect here#its like so annoying though that i even care like whats wrong with me why does this bother me so much#just cuz i see myself in this character and also feel like shit and idk when he doesnt even get to live doesnt get to recover#and this is treated as a good game with a profound theme and this is treated as good writing#its hard not to be hurt when its like. im barely hanging on man#and youre telling me he can be saved by someone noticing him and caring about him and he can get through it and be loved and try to heal#but this is treated as some sorta disservice to the narrative and that you cant have the theme work this way#its like. but this is the only way i can even feel anything about this theme this actually makes me wanna try#seeing the character going through mental issues like mine die just like. it makes things suck idk#and its like why do i even care like this shouldnt matter but idk its like#if he can make it then why cant i#and im just really attached to this and i really really want to make my fic of him exist cuz. nothing is going good for me rn#but if i can make this one thing thats important to me where someone gets to recover then maybe ill feel less helpless#its what im trying to tell myself so i can stop feeling like im. idk cringe or something cuz im emotionally attached to a fictional#character and the wellbeing of this character feels like motivation for me#i just wish i wasnt so damn desperate about it đ©#anyway can someone please slap me with a fish so i can stop being insecure about my writing and just fucking do it
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Wonderful! I enjoyed this so so much. I truly had no idea what would happen next throughout reading and I love when that happens. So many moments where I was like o m g !!!! This feels so unique and special! Ahhhhh I loved itđ©·đ©·
Hummingbirds
~5.2k words
From me: Based on a song of the same name--you'll see the lyrics in a moment. You'll need to suspend your belief a bit. I'm not sure everything makes perfect sense, but. Some of this story takes place through emailing and I didn't have a good method for this. So bold will be Harry's emails. Pink writing will be hers.
Warnings: angst, fluff, anger honestly just fluffy. second chance love
Summary: Harry has been angry for a really really long time. Only one person ever made him confront his anger.
âEli, baby, we have to go!â
Harry could hear her from outside. He smirked, sipping his tea while he waited for Buddy to do his business. The air was crisp just like October should be. Decorative spider webs lined the front porch and the flower bushes in front of it. He was utterly pleased with his life. So completely happy.
âMommy! I canât find my dinosaur sneakers!â
âI donât know how to spell it,â Evie frowned. âIâm going to fail!â
âJust do your best and practice, my love. I believe in you,â she assured as she zipped her backpack up at the doorway and stuffed her feet into the slip-on sneakers by the door. They make me feel old, she told Harry. Theyâre the perfect shoes for a busy Mum, he assured her. And I think yâlook hot wearing them.
âEli, honey!â She called back. âTheyâre here by the front door!â
Harry couldnât stop smiling. âHow lucky am I, Buddy?â He asked shaking the leash slightly. The dog turned to him and then tugged him around the yard looking for the right spot; totally unaware or unaffected that Harry had the best life there was to live.
âI-M-P-E-R-U-T-I-V-E.â
âClose, baby girl,â she smiled encouragingly. âItâs an A, not U.â
She looked miserable as she stepped off the porch. Evie approached Harry while his wife bent to help Eli with his sneakers. âIâm going to fail, Daddy.â
He chuckled at the little nine-year-old. Crouched to her height twirling the leash tight around one hand. He straightened her little hair bow on the side of her head, pinning her hair back to one side. He kissed her forehead. âMummy said yâwere close. Yâdid a great job. Yâjusâ have târemember thereâs an A,â he reminded her and then pinched her cheek gently. âLike the grade youâre going tâget, right?â He winked at her.
Evieâs sweet eyes lit up with new hope. She turned to the pretty woman at the door holding Eliâs hand to usher him quickly out of the house now that his shoes were securely on his feet. âMommy! Did you hear what Daddy said to help me remember?â
She grinned so beautifully; it melted him. The center of his chest felt deliriously warm. It felt equivalent to being snuggled under a blanket with her, warm and close while it snowed outside their house. The kids drinking hot chocolate at the coffee table and a movie playing in the background.
It was unbelievable she was all his. âWhat did Daddy say, Evie?â Eli held onto her hand tight while he jumped from the second to last step of the porch while Evie explained the A she was going to get. âWell, I guess you inherited your smarts from Daddy, hmm?â Which was unequivocally a joke. She was a hundred times smarter than him. Or at least it felt that way. But he loved her so much for never making him feel less than. She was good at that. It was impossible to feel less than in her presence.
She was good at everything. Her job, being a wife, but perhaps his favorite thing, she was a tremendous mother. Something he knew she would be good at, but not to the extent he witnessed on a daily basis. Eli hurried to Harry and Buddy petting the dogâs head and giggling when he licked his face. Harry kissed the top of his head and gave his little body a squeeze. âWhat smarts?â Harry asked.
She rolled her eyes as she finally approached her family. âYouâre plenty smart, baby,â she shook her head with a gentle smile. The two kids that looked like the perfect combination of them went to her car and climbed into their respective seats. Harry wrapped his free arm around her back and pulled her to his side. He kissed her temple, nosing along her hairline.
âNot as smart as mâbeautiful wife,â he reminded her. She laughed.
âI love you.â She tilted her head up for a kiss which Harry never let her wait for.
âI love you,â he grinned into the kiss.
âEw!â Eli called.
âMommy, letâs go!â Evie was eager to get to school and ace her spelling test.
âBye Daddy!â Eli shouted. She gave his cheek a final peck and she headed across the yard to take their kids to school. âSee you at my soccer game!â
âHey kitten?â He called.
âYeah?â She asked over her shoulder.
âMâa lucky man tâhave you,â he reminded her.
She shook her head, laughed. âMe too, baby. Luckiest girl in the world to have you.â
The second her door closed behind her a swarm of hummingbirds fluttered so loudly into the yard. Seemingly out of nowhere. The noise of their wings was unbelievable. A dull roar. It was hundreds of the little birds, and she paid no mind to them as she started her car. Buddy didnât care about the intrusion either. Even the kids were indifferent. âAre yâseeing this?â He called out to her. He blinked curiously when she didnât respond. âWhatâs with all theââ
*
I had a dream last night / we were married in that house you always talked about / you were rushing to get the kids to school / packing their lunches, reviewing their spelling words / it was hummingbirds
Harryâs heart was beating like he had just finished a workout. His skin felt clammy. The sheets were wrapped too tightly around his legs. He groaned as his alarm vibrated to the same hum of the birds in his dream. The music playing alongside the vibration made him grumpy. âWhat the fuck?â He whispered and smacked the song off. He wished he could go right back. Did Evie pass her test? Did Eli score a goal?
Did she still love him the way he dreamed about?
*
Dr. Hendren listened to Harryâs dream but very much already knew the ending. It was the same as all his dreams with the house and the girl that he had been hearing for ten years.
âHarry,â the doctor said gently as he watched Harry on his screen. âDo you know what hummingbirds symbolize?â
âNo,â Harry was grumpy. He always was after a dream that was so real so lifelike. It wasnât fair. He just wanted her back. Wanted to see her. Wanted to know.
âHealing.â Dr. Hendren was quiet while Harry processed that. He worked his jaw, swallowing, and flexing it as he tried to get the words to come out. His body felt tense. Like he was trapped inside a box that was too small. That didnât seem right. He didnât feel like he was healed. He was still frustrated most of the time. Work was a minor distraction, and the loneliness was crippling at times. The only reprieve was dreaming of that pretty girl he knew so many years ago.
Why did it have to be her? She didnât deserve Harry and his bad attitude. She already suffered through it for two years at a time when life should have been fun, lovely, sweet. They were kids and Harry was an ass. He never even said he loved her back then.
âDonât you think,â Dr. Hendren continued quietly, and Harry knew what he was going to say. âYouâve been quiet long enough about what you want?â He shrugged. âHarry,â he tutted.
âI wasnât a good boyfriend.â
âYou were a kid.â
âShe deserved more.â
âThen tell her. Worst case scenario, she doesnât want to talk to you and youâll have some closure and you can stop dreaming about it.â
Harry remained silent, looking around his empty apartment. He took a deep breath and nodded. âAlright. Iâll reach out to her.â
âHarry,â Dr. Hendren said quietly. âHave you thought about the best-case scenario?â
He shook his head. Thatkind of hope could kill him. But he knew why the dreams were so powerful these days. Why they were so steady and quick.
Woke up bleeding from my mouth / I bit my tongue right through / well I broke the habit / I guess that Iâd had it not saying the things I need to
The following morning, he searched his inbox from an email he hadnât used in ten years and found the address he never thought heâd email again after he broke up with her way back when.
But Harry wasnât twenty anymore. He was trying to move on. Trying to fix things that should have been fixed a long time ago. He sat on the couch, typed out seven different versions of the message and clicked send before he could overthink it any longer. He slapped the computer shut and rubbed his hands on his pants. He took a sip of the tea he made hoping to calm himself and told himself that it was okay if she didnât answer.
Hey. Long time. Not sure if you use this email. I know itâs been a long while. Hope youâre well. ... Iâve been thinking of you. And truthfully, I had a pretty realistic dream that you were in the other night. Nothing weird. Just my old self and back then and... I donât know. ... How are you?
If she was working, she might just be getting settled. Or maybe out with a friend. Running errands. He refrained from imagining a little family that was waiting on her for dinner but reminded himself anyway that there were a million reasons sheâ
His phone lit up on the table beside the computer and his heart skipped a beat.
Harry Styles. As I live and breathe :) Iâm well! How are you?
That little smiley face made his heart ache with adoration for her. He could picture her pretty face smiling. But she answered.
Good. Yeah. I⊠Iâve been going to therapy regularly. Finally had to and... my doctor and I have discussed a lot of things. You were one of them. I just... wanted to chat with you. Iâm sorry, this is so out of the blue and weird.
No! Not at all, Harry. Iâm glad you reached out. Itâs really nice to hear from you. Therapy? Thatâs amazing! Do you like it?
Iâm a work in progress.
Arenât we all? :)
He smiled feeling relieved. Even just reading words on a screen made him feel at ease. He could practically hear her sweet, encouraging voice.
What are you up to? Do you live in state still?
Yes! I actually just moved down the road from the college. Iâm a guidance counselor at the local high school.
Thatâs lovely. Iâm not surprised you accomplished your goals. Your students are lucky to have you. Are you doing okay? It has to be draining.
A lot of the time yeah. But itâs rewarding as hell. You know I love kids, and I love being able to help.
Harry wondered if it was possible to love her more than he ever had before.
Thereâs a shadow on my shoulder / always whispers in my ear / that Iâm so angry all of the time / I should be alone another year / I didnât say it how you needed it / must have written it down a thousand times / all the things I would scream at the top of my lungs / if I wasnât so busy saying Iâm fine.
Harry had a habit of not saying what he was feeling. He bottled so much of it up and hid it from the rest of the world. Even people he loved. When he was dating her back in college, he kept a lot hidden and exploded when she asked him simple questions about himself. Trying to understand him and why he was angry all the time. Her willingness to look past it, try and help, and just continue to be kind to him made him angry too. It was constant, draining. It was like he couldnât help himself.
There was a tiny voice in his head that told him he was too angry for her. She deserved someone lovely and sweet. Someone who would talk to her and tell her things. Be the person she deserved. Because despite everything, Harry loved love. It was nearly impossible for him to show it back then. But he did. He wanted to love her the way she needed.
But he was so busy being angry and bottling his emotions he couldnât do it. He couldnât love her the right way.
It was so unfair to her and looking back on it made him feel like a proper ass.
So, he was grateful for the email communication. He couldnât imagine having this conversation with her about all this in person. They chatted for days. Catching up on things, reminiscing. Their email chain was up to 100 something messages. Some messages were long. Harry chatted about his family and she about hers. There were updates on work. On friends they still spoke to and no longer did. The conversation continued over the course of a little under a week.
But the most shocking details came from her.
I mentioned I moved... my ex-fiancĂ© broke off our engagement. Donât feel too bad for me, itâs actually a relief in hindsight. Something Iâve been trying to figure through. Itâs why I know that anything you feel you did wasnât nearly as bad as you thought it was. Thereâs far worse relationship enders than a little bit of anger.
Jesus, Iâm so sorry, kitten.
Well, isnât that a sweet name for sore eyes :) Donât be sorry. Itâs good. I have this cute apartment to myself and itâs for the best it happened now before there were too many variables to consider...like kids or a house or something, you know? Iâm definitely sad. But he wasnât the one for me at the end of the day.
Sorry for dumping all that on you. Itâs not really fair given our past. I think a lot of my friends disagree with my choice on this to let him go so itâs nice to just tell someone non-judgmental.
Harry felt angry the way he used to. The way that made him want to scream and he felt the desperate need to message Dr. Hendren because he felt out of his depth. All he said was sorry. How could she feel he was non-judgmental. He was judgmental. He was judging the fuck out of the piece of shit that broke her heart and made her sad.
But he was no better.
The man is an idiot to lose you. I know from experience.
:) I have to head to bed, thereâs a big pep rally tomorrow at school so I have to have my brain ready for chaos. Sleep well Harry.
Good night, kitten.
He reread those messages over and over and right before he was going to fall asleep, his phone lit up with one more message.
Youâre not an idiot by the way. He might be, but you, Harry Styles are not.
So of course, he dreamed of Evie, Eli, and the sweet girl at the other end of his emails that night.
And hummingbirds.
Thousands of hummingbirds.
*
Most of their messages were short.
Iâve been going to therapy for three years now.
Thatâs wonderful, Harry. Really. Do you like it?
Yeah...itâs hard.
:( Yeah... It really is. Do you like your therapist?
Yeah. Iâve had him the whole time.
Yeah? Thatâs good. Iâm... proud of you. I donât want to be weird about it, but I know you were angry. Really angry. It wasnât good. You didnât deserve that. Iâm glad you have someone to help you work through it.
...You were so nice to me. When you shouldnât have been. I didnât treat you right.
You were wonderful, Harry. We were practically kids. If our relationship had any faults, it was because we were too young. I donât regret a second of time being with you.
His heart skipped a beat. He felt that frustration from back when they were young, and she was so understanding but it didnât make him grumpy or feel inadequate. All he felt was a sense of belonging. Something he probably would have felt back then if he could have gotten out of his own way. She was willing to look past it then as she was now.
Youâre much too forgiving. He wrote. Because old habits die hard.
You werenât fine, Harry. You didnât know. We didnât know what we were dealing with at that age.
Harry hadnât a clue what he was dealing with. Did he even know now?
Can... can I give you something?
Give me something?
Yes. I... I can bring it to your apartment or to school or we can meet, I just... Iâve been trying to let it go but I think... I think my dream was reminding me that... thereâs more to you. More I need to do for you.
Sure, if you think it will give you closure.
God, Harry wanted anything but closure.
Just to clarify: I donât think you owe me anything.
I kept a lot hidden from you. I held back and it wasnât fair. All you wanted was to love me and I wouldnât let you.
Itâs a vulnerable thing, Harry. To be loved. You didnât do anything wrong. We were just young.
But... you knew I wasnât fine, and you tried and... I just wasnât fair to you.
You were fine, Harry. I promise. Bring me whatever it is that you need to give me to make you believe you did what you could with what you had.
*
Her apartment had a wreath on the door. It was beautiful with an array of burnt orange and red flowers and green vines. The perfect fall wreath. Beside the door were three pumpkins of different sizes. If he didnât have her address, he almost thought he would know it was her place. He looked at the mat in front of the door that said welcome, and he wondered if there was any other place where someone actually meant it.
Swallowing, he took a deep breath and knocked. After a minute, the door was out of the way.
At 18, Harry thought she was beautiful. The most beautiful girl he had ever met. During the time they dated, he thought she got more beautiful every second. Apparently, he was right because the woman before him somehow got exponentially more beautiful. Her smile was so inviting, so warm. Like he was seeing an old friend. âHey Harry,â her voice was sweet. Not an ounce of distrust, frustration, nothing. Their breakup was ten years ago. Not a degree of anger was left.
Harry wasnât angry either. Not anymore. But if she had broken up with him and he hadnât done all this work to better himself, he would have been. He didnât know how she could be so sweet after all she went through.
âHi,â he swallowed. âI donât want tâkeep you. Sâreally nice tâsee you,â his dream didnât do her justice. Sure, she was beautiful especially with their imaginary kids. Simply stunning. But this was more. This was the beautiful angel he loved so much even when she wasnât his to love.
âYouâre not keeping me; do you want to come in?â She shifted to open the door wider. âI can make some tea. Or we can order pizza?â
âNo,â he shook his head. âI jusâ want tâgive yâthis,â he handed her the shoe box.
She opened the lid. âWell, you know I wonât say no to shoes,â she smirked.
As much as he wanted to laugh at her joke, he felt like he made a mistake. The box was out of his hands. Not because of what was in there but because of the fear of rejection and being so vulnerable. Feelings of inadequacy were currently circulating through his bloodstream. âUm... sânotââ
âWhat is this?â She asked, tilting her head. He swallowed, pinched his lower lip between his fingers and took a deep breath.
âSâletters.â
âLetters?â
âI wrote tâyou.â
âMe?â
He took a deep breath. âMâsure yâknow mânot good at saying what mâfeeling.â
She replaced the lid, leaning against the frame. âI feel like Iâm a little lost here, Harry.â
He nodded, shoved his hands in his pockets so he wouldnât fidget or reach back out to take it from her. His mouth felt dry. He wished he had taken her offer for a glass of water now. Â âI know yâsaid yâthought we were fine. But mânot happy with how I treated you. Yâwere an angel. The perfect girlfriend and I treated yâunfairly a lot. I guess Iâve really held onto that and some of those letters are old but when I hit low points I thought âbout what yâsaid back then. How I wasnât on mâown. I was allowed tâbe angry. But I had tâlet people in. All that. I wrote tâyou a lot over the years. Mâtherapist said it was actually one of the smartest things Iâve done on mâown,â he chuckled. âI want you târead them. When yâhave time. I guess. I donât know,â he cleared his throat. âThis is really scary,â he admitted.
âOkay,â she nodded encouragingly and reached out to his forearm. She squeezed it reassuringly. It was only a touch on his arm, and he felt so good feeling it. He knew it was her training kicking in. Like a broken, beaten student at her office door. âI can do that,â she assured him. âDo you want me to text you about each one? Or just a summary of all of them? Or do you want me to not say anything?â
He looked at his feet. âFuck...â he whispered to himself. âI donât know.â
âOkay,â she took a deep breath. âThank you,â she smiled. âIâll start reading tonight and Iâll decide in the moment. You donât have to answer if you donât want.â
He nodded, looked at his feet. âIâm sorry.â
âSorry?â
âSâa lot.â
âI enjoy reading, Harry,â she grinned and moved her hand to his upper arm and soothingly rubbed up and down. âThank you for trusting me.â
Of course he did. There was no one else he really did. He nodded, feeling nauseous but still lighter. âIâm gonna go now,â he swallowed.
âIâll email you,â she assured him with a smile and headed inside.
*
Like it grows old real fast / how much you can love and not get it back / were we too attached? / Itâs a shame how often goodbyes last / I thought we were better than that / I thought I was stronger at last.
The knock on the door was hurried, eager. Insistent on being heard.
At first, he felt frozen in the kitchen cleaning up the dinner he made himself and placing the dirty dishes in the sink. Maybe he imagined the knock. Maybe he was just dreaming again. Plus, she said she would email right? This wasnât something to feel nervous about.
But the flutter of knocking continued. He hurried from his frozen position as the rapid taps hit the wood. He knew. His gut telling him exactly who was on the other side of that door. Taking a deep breath, he swallowed before pulling it out of the way.
âYou bought me the house?!â She shrieked.
Harry dipped his head to avoid her eyes. âYes.â
âHarry Styles, what the fuck?!â
He felt sick. âYou hate it?â
Her eyes were red, glossy. Not what he expected at all. But why wasnât it? This wasnât normal. After a breakup of her own where she was sure she was going to marry the guy. Harry appeared out of nowhere. Telling her that he had a dream about her, and he hadnât stopped thinking about her.
She covered her mouth and shook her head. âHarry,â she croaked.
âIâmâ"
âYou canât buy me a house! Weâre not even... Harry. This is insane! You have to see that!â
He shrugged. âI guess... but... I donât know, kitten. I think about you all the time. I see this house in my sleep. I see our life in mâdreams every night.â
She was wearing only socks. Like she didnât even have time to put on shoes. She held the paper in her hand wrinkled like she had read it hundreds of times already even though he had only given it to her the night before and he just knew which one was in her hands. She cleared her throat and read the date from ten years ago before she read the remainder of the letter.
To the resident(s) of 1278 Chestnut Street
My name is Harry Styles, and I am a college student in town. My girlfriend and I walk by your lovely home every day when we head to our favorite coffee shop after class. We love your home. Or I should say, my girlfriend LOVES your home. She claims itâs her dream home. The porch, the yard, the location... everything. She even loves your driveway. Every bit of your house is part of this fantastic dream she has of the life she wants in the future.
I donât know if Iâll be with her forever. I am... working on myself. Iâm not very good at all this relationship stuff. Especially when it comes to her. Quite frankly, I think she deserves way better than me. But on the off chance I am lucky enough to keep her in my life for as long as I would like, I want to make her dreams come true. She deserves that. She deserves every single one of her dreams to come true. She is the kind of girl that deserves every good thing that can possibly be provided for her.
If you ever find yourself selling, would you please consider emailing me first? Of course, if you have family that you plan on giving your home to, I understand. I canât even promise Iâll be able to afford it, but Iâll want to know. If only to pass on the message to her somewhere down the line. She deserves the chance to have all her dreams come true.
Iâm not sure where you are in life or if you have ever been in a relationship like this one. This girl is so special. Sheâs an angel. The kind of love that even a movie couldnât show, or a book couldnât write. Iâm lucky to have her right now and I donât know why sheâs with me. I donât know why Iâm even sending this crazy letter other than I know I have to try. Even if sheâs smart enough to leave me, I want her to know her dream home is available. Somewhere down the road. Even if weâre not on the same road anymore. Thatâs what she deserves.
Iâm sorry to bother you like this. I hope you can understand what love can do to a guy in college with a girlfriend who is LEAGUES above him. Thank you for taking time to read this and I hope you continue to enjoy your lovely home.
Sincerely,
Harry
Her voice shook as she read it. âYou sent that when we were in college.â He nodded, swallowed the lump in his throat and looked at the packet stapled together. âThey emailed you,â she whispered. He nodded again.
âDear Harry. We got your letter. When the time comes. Weâll be moving closer to our children. Theyâve never expressed interest in our house the way you have. My wife and I met in college and believe me, I know a little something about finding the girl of your dreams. Itâs nice youâre working on yourself. You deserve the life that fits this house too. We hope itâs with the girl that is leagues above you (although, we imagine sheâd think differently). Weâll be in touch. The Andersons.â
Harry watched her flip the page as she made eye contact with him briefly before returning her gaze to the paper in front of her.
âDear Harry. We hope life is treating you well. That youâre working on yourself, and your girlfriend is still around. If sheâs not, we hope youâre not being too hard on yourself. We wanted to let you know weâll soon be moving to a retirement community close to our son. We want to have you (and your girlfriend) over for dinner if youâre available. Let us know.â
Harry knew what was coming but he was still terrified. Why was she here? Barefoot. Reading the letters to him. What did she think.
âDear Harry. It was so nice to meet you in person. Here is the contract we discussed. See you soon.â
He rubbed the back of his head. âKitten,â he whispered.
âDear Harry. We hope you get her back. Enjoy your home. Never stop giving out your love. The Andersons.â
She was teary, swallowing hard. Her hands were shaking as she held the papers in front of her. âYou bought me a house.â
He nodded. There was a pause. âMâsorry I took so long.â
She dropped the papers and launched herself into his arms. He stumbled back at the impact. Her arms around his neck, her feet barely touching the floor as she tucked her face into his shoulder. âHarry,â she whimpered. Harry sighed, wrapped his arms tightly around her, one at her waist, the other hand cupping the back of her head.
âIâve loved you for so long,â his voice felt raw. Like he was the one that was crying and shaking. Not her.
She sniffled and nodded. âI know,â because she did. She read every single letter. Watched the date change but one thing never did and that was the love she felt in each letter.
âMâso tired, kitten,â he croaked.
âOf what, baby?â She cupped his face. The emotion on his face was tender and nothing like she remembered from ten years prior. Her thumb soothingly rubbed his cheek.
âLife without you,â he closed his eyes tight. âThis house is yours I want nothing more than for you tâhave it, but I want it tâbe ours.â
She sniffled, ducked her head briefly as she glanced around. âYou decorated it for Halloween,â she whispered.
âYou would have done better.â
She snorted. âHarry...â
âIf this is the house that makes you happy then I want it jusâ as much, kitten. But youâre my home. You always have been.â
âI donât know what to say Harry,â she whimpered.
âSay yes.â
âHarry...â she whispered.
âPlease, Iâm so tired of loving and loving and never feeling that way. I know sâhow I made yâfeel in college and yâjusâ dealt with it. Yâjusâ wanted love and I didnât give yâwhat yâneeded. But mâready now. Mâso ready tâdo whatever yâneed tâlove you the way yâdeserve. The way yâalways deserved.â
Not for the first time in his life, Harry prayed that if this was a dream, he would never wake up.
He never thought he would hold her again. Never thought she would be in the house she always wanted. Or that she would know he was sorry for how he was back when he was an angry kid.
Perhaps most importantly, he never thought he would feel her lips on his ever again.
--
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#omg I was so enthralled I realized halfway I wasnât taking my notes along the way#somewhere down the road. Even if weâre not on the same road anymore. LOVEEEE#the Andersons knowing she thinks differently#omg teary eyed by the end of the convo with the andersons#iâve loved you for so long GOODNIGHT đđđđ„ș#watched the date change but one thing never did and that was the love she felt in each letter. LOVEEEE#when she called him baby eeeeeee !#love how this ended#okay from the top - stay with me#I love the word imperative#like the grade youâre going to get right is peak dad humor#I had a dream last nightđŠđŠđŠit was a dream ?!#the growth though by going to therapy and the self awareness and all that đââïžđââïž#I was so excited to see how these emails were gonna go and they did not disappoint#sheâs so kind#can I give you something I was like omg what is it gonna be#I had no idea#nervy#love a good wreath#he wondered if there was any other place where someone actually meant it. LOVEEE#he wrote lettersđźđźđ„șđ©#that mustâve been so nerve racking for him to hand those over a big step for him#a house ?!!!!!!! A houseeeeeeee ?!!!!đźđźđź#him writing a letter to them is soooooođ„șđ„č#okay weâre back to where I started LOL#harry styles fic rec#fic rec#so good so good#love love love#this was beautiful
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I'm gonna let you in on a badly kept secret. most of my dazai analysis is truly just me projecting. but being decent enough at bullshitting to make it sound convincing so ppl usually end up agreeing with my takes
#what i lack in actual reading comprehension and analysis abilities i make up for in charisma and fake confidence#ahdjfllhh or maybe my projections just fit! maybe i accidentally do make good analysis! or at least offer alternative readings!#anyway i was thinking abt his relationship with pain again. and i started writing an essay in my head#before realizing I'm basically describing my own relationship with it. and that my experiences are not universal esp in regards to that#but just bc they're not universal doesn't mean they're nonexistent! who's to say dazai doesn't have them as well đ©#fr tho i think with a character like him that hides a lot of himself and his true feelings. insisting on one 'canon' reading is dumb#the whole point is you view him through your own personal experience. imo. that's what he'd want too#the emptiness inside him is meant to be filled by his audience. whether inside the story or outside it. i think.#that's why he is one thing around fyodor and another around atsushi and i see him one way and you see him in another one#and all these readings are right and all these versions are still him. you don't know what's inside the donut after all#but again :) even this part could be just me projecting :) but see how nicely i bullshitted through it to make it sound deep?#(<- being sincere but hiding it with irony as to not get rejected. as one does) (<- admits it bc who tf would get this far into my tags)#(but thank you if you did ily) (also shoutout to anyone who ever validated my unhinged analysis/projection mwah)
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I LOVEEEEE YOU FICS OMG OMG
If you could be so kind to write a DomgojoxBratreader where he is her academic rival and they are always arguing but they start falling for each other. She is sassy and he matches her energy đđœđđœ
I pushed her back to the wall and said âYou done?â
Tags: dom!Satoru x fem!Reader, brat!Reader, brat taming, academic rivals, rivals to lovers, slight angst, maybe hurt/comfort, hea, cursing, smut, mdni, spanking, slight impact play, cunninglingus, unprotected sex, this shit gonna be nasty i fear.
An: This all takes place when they're in a like Jujutsu Tech College... bare with me lmao. It's basically the events from their highschool years, but I made it to where they happened while they were in college, so all the characters are of age here. I looooove the academic rivals trope after I wrote my Hiromi fic đ© you can read that here if youâre interested! Also, so sorry but this is a long one... 7.3k words...
Thwak!
Your body jolts forward a bit as youâre slung unceremoniously over Satoruâs shoulder. His large palm wooshes to connect with your bottom once more.
Thwak!
âWhy is it always the small ones who I can throw around so effortlessly that talk the most shit?â His face is occupied with that shit eating grin as he gives your ass another spank just for the hell of it. Thereâs nothing you can do about it anyways. He may as well have his fun.
âPut me down, Satoru!!â You whine, trying to jostle your way out of his grip, but heâs having none of it. Your fists pound at his muscular back, but he continues to laugh. Without your cursed technique, youâre really are just a weakling to him.
âWhere are your manners, princess? Thatâs no way to speak to your upperclassmen.â He taunts as he continues to carry you around with ease. âMaybe if you call me senpai, Iâll put you down.â
âFuck no! Iâm not doing that, weirdo!â You huff as your body continues to wriggle in his grasp. Geto watches with an amused look on his face. He makes no effort to stop Satoruâs shenanigans since you really were asking for this by provoking him all day today.
Your cursed technique is the only one that comes close to countering Satoruâs, so youâre the only person heâll bother training with. However, heâs a complete asshole to train with.
When youâre losing, he gets all cocky and mouthy, talking about how weak and pathetic you are. When youâre putting up a good fight, Satoru somehow gets even more energetic. His cursed energy output increases exponentially, and he gets touchier too because he canât cope with the euphoric feeling of actually having a challenge.
Principal Yaga was the unfortunate soul who had to tell Satoru that it was inappropriate to bear hug you for so long after a good sparring session. One time, you were trapped in his arms, completely unable to move for almost an hour as he rambled about how much he enjoyed getting that energy out. His face was also coincidentally(?) shoved in your chest. He, of course, claims it was nothing sexual, but you were completely pressed against him. You felt him grow hard against your thigh.
Either way, you always felt like you had a chip on your shoulder. You didnât just want to he known as the one who could âalmost counter Satoruâ. You wanted to be known as the one who could beat the strongest sorcerer of today.
Unfortunately, you werenât strong enough to beat him in combat yet, so you usually provoked him with words. All day, Geto has had to listen to you and Satoru bickering back and forth with each other.
âWell, at least my eyes arenât off putting to look at.â
âMy eyes are beautiful, princess. Youâre just mad that you canât get a date meanwhile I have girls falling all over me.â Satoru of course childishly stuck his tongue out at you.
âBold of you to assume I canât get a date.â You fire back with a small huff, crossing your arms over your chest.
âOh? Does the princess have a date? Make sure to let me know how that goes.â Satoru laughs, and his hand ruffles your hair uncaringly.
âYou can ask your dad tomorrow morning how it went.â Youâre use to Satoruâs sass by now, and you know how to perfectly match his freak as some would say.
Satoru shoots you a small glare, which only elicits a giggle from you. You decide to push it further. âYeah, Iâm thinking about giving you a sibling. What do you think about that, hm? Maybe weâll make another six-eyed freak with the limitless technique, so you arenât that special.â
Satoruâs nose twitched in disdain. Not only did he not like the thought of not being special anymore; he despised the thought of you sleeping with his dad.
And thatâs how you ended up thrown over his shoulder as he carried you towards the training matts. âQuite the mouth on you, princess. If only you could fight as good as you yap.â He smirked as he gave your ass a light spank. Once he realized the amount of control he had over you in that moment, it was game over for you.
âLet me go, Satoru!â You shrieked as Gojo continued to manhandle you over his shoulder. After a good twenty minutes of him holding you up, Suguru finally spoke out.
âYou two are starting to sound like an old married couple. Put her down, Satoru.â Getoâs calming voice finally laid down the law to which Satoru reluctantly abided by, allowing for your feet to touch the floor.
You caught your breath as you were put down. It had been taxing to wrestle in his arms and scream for him to stop it. He knew you couldnât activate your cursed technique while had full control over your body. Plus, if you were to activate your technique, you wouldâve likely hurt Geto in the process. Satoru knew you wouldnât even entertain the risk.
While Satoru was Suguruâs one and only friend, you were more like a little sister at Suguruâs side. He was the only one who didnât view you as âSatoruâs counterâ. To Suguru, you were just ây/nâ. He saw you as an underclassman with an unprecedented level of potential.
He also often helped you with your studies. While Satoru was technically the brighter one of the two, Suguru was a true teacher. He explained even the most complicated topics to you, much to Satoruâs displeasure.
You didnât miss the scowl on Satoruâs face each time you came up to both of them to request for Getoâs help. You didnât miss the way heâd stare at both of you with a slight pout and how heâd try to tell you the answer before Geto could explain it.
You figured that it was just Satoru being spoiled. He didnât like not being the center of attention when it came to you and Geto.
Satoru turned towards you, and he opened his mouth to continue on his little beratement of you when the door to the training area was abruptly opened. Principal Yaga stepped through the doors and called Gojo and Geto to his office.
The principal ended up sending the two young men out on a mission, and that was when everything changed between you three.
*** *** ***
Things between you three went dry for a while. You knew the details of what happened, but you didnât dare talk directly to Satoru or Suguru about it.
Both of the men went their own separate directions, leaving you behind in the dust as if you were a child of divorce. Satoru took on an ungodly amount of training, barely ever at the dorms to do anything. Suguru occupied himself with a massive amount of missions.
Suguru was getting skinnier too. His long black hair was becoming thinner by the day, and he always looked so painfully tired. You felt like you would be a burden on him if you asked for any help from him.
Satoru was training so much, putting on more muscle in every place of his body. He didnât ever invite you to spar with him anymore. He never taunted you in the hallways or even made direct eye contact with you.
They were both so preoccupied in their own grief that they seemingly forgot about you.
Things didnât stop there either.
Haibaraâs death shook Jujutsu Tech to its core. Nanami dropped out of the program. Suguru dropped out and was now a wanted criminal. Shoko wasnât on the teaching path anymore, moving to learn more RCT to prevent something like this from happening again.
It was just you and Satoru on the teaching path. âClassâ if you can even call it that - was so depressing that you barely bothered to show up for lectures anymore. Satoru was taking on every single mission, filling in for Suguru, Nanami, and Haibaraâs absence. He wouldnât even speak to you about Suguru or anything else for that matter.
Feeling so incredibly alone, you were curled up in your dorm late one night. Your face was sticky from tears, and your breath was so uneven. You just needed to talk to someone.
You didnât think heâd answer, but Suguru sounded happy when he picked up the phone.
âY/n, how are you?â His voice was like a double edged sword. It was so comforting to hear his voice, but you also remembered the lives he took.
You two spoke for over two hours. You vented out every single grief and complaint to him while he calmly tried to convince you that Jujutsu Tech was a waste of your time.
He was so good at buttering you up, making you feel like his way of thinking even made sense. You were so desperate for a friend; you couldnât care less that you were essentially signing yourself up for a cult.
âCome to me, y/n. We could do great things together. Itâd be like old times. I need you here with me.â A cult leader preying on someone when theyâre at their lowest.
You agreed, hanging up the phone to start packing your bags. You couldnât take living here anymore anyways, not after everything. Satoru probably wouldnât even notice that youâre gone.
Quietly creeping down through the dorms, duffle bag in hand, you flinch when a sudden hand grips your shoulder from behind. You let out a sharp gasp followed by a small cry before you turn around quickly.
Satoru was standing behind you, no humor in his face at all. He was shirtless. His abs and muscular arms were on full display as he was only wearing a pair of grey sweatpants, and his hair was slightly damp from a shower.
âWhere are you going?â He asked in a tone youâd never heard him use. He was being stern with you as if you were a child.
You shift uncomfortably underneath his gaze before you brush his hand off your shoulder. âIâm going to go stay with a friend.â You give him a half-lie, not able to tell him to his face that you were leaving.
âPretty large duffle bag for going to stay with a friend, donât you think?â His hand effortlessly takes the duffle bag off your shoulder, and he pulls it away from you before opening it, taking notes of the contents inside. âI donât know why you bother lying to me. My six eyes know when youâre not telling the truth.â
You try to take the duffle bag back from him, but he dodges and bats away all of your attempts. âI wasnât lying!â You shout, getting frustrated and impatient with him. âItâs not like you even care. Give me my shit back.â
Bright blue eyes look up at you, and his pupils dilate, the size of small pinholes. âI donât care?â He asks before letting out a humorless laugh. Itâs eerie seeing him like this, like a stick that just about to snap if anyone applied anymore pressure to him.
âYou donât. You donât even talk to me anymore, even when I try talking to you! You and Geto completely blew me off.â Hot tears burn in your eyes as youâre forced to face how you feel right in front of him. âAt least Geto wants to talk to me now.â You murmured quietly, shifting your gaze to the ground.
âYou talked to Suguru?â Satoru asks, eyes wide and full of anger. His palm comes up and grips your hair pulling it back so youâll look him in the eyes.
You let out a sharp hiss as his fingers are digging into your scalp. âLet go of me!â You shout, trying to free his hand from your hair.
Things finally start to click in Satoruâs head. You were leaving him, leaving him to go stay with Suguru. His stomach coiled in white hot rage and jealousy. Could you not see all he had done for you? Yet, you still choose Suguru, who had done nothing for you.
Your body feels weak and unstable as youâre suddenly teleported to the training mats in the gym. âSatoru, what?â You ask as you look around as best as you can. He finally frees your scalp.
âYou want to go be with him?â He asks before throwing your duffle bag against the door. He then leans over and starts to stretch his legs. âYouâll have to beat me. Prove to me that youâre strong enough, and Iâll let you go. I wonât keep chasing you.â
"Satoru, you're talking crazy..." You reply as you glance over to your duffle bag that was slumped against the door. You had no want or intention of fighting Satoru. "I'm allowed to drop out if I want."
"So what? You just quit? You're just going to let me win like that? Bullshit, yn. I know you better than that." Satoru's eyes bore holes into the very depths of your soul. He does know you better than that â knows that you're not one to back down from a challenge.
Your jaw tightens as you watch him, anger coiling in your stomach. He can never just let you have what you want. Everything was a fight to him. He always gets what he wants because he's the fucking starboy of Jujutsu, and you're just "close enough" to his counter.
You rip your sweatshirt away from your body, tossing it off the matt. Your torso was clad in a thin tank top that you didn't necessarily plan on letting anyone see. You roll your neck. If he wanted to fight, you'd give him one last one.
"Atta girl." He whistles with a smug grin. His body is still in a fighting stance, waiting for you to take yours.
You don't even bother to respond to his praise. You know he's only acting like this to get under your skin more. "Make it count, Satoru. This will be the last time I ever fight you."
"Oh, I make it count each and every time."
It's not long before you two are completely at each other's throats. The amount of cursed energy emitting from the training area was absolutely devastating for the school. Building foundations literally shook. The lights flickered constantly, and a few even blew.
You two were lucky it was in the dead of night. If anyone was awake to witness this, they would've already put a stop to it, but most citizens must've chocked the movements up to small earthquakes in their sleepy haze.
Your body was tired and bruised, but you weren't going to give up. You wouldn't tap â no matter how many times Gojo put you in different submission positions. You always managed to break free and hit him with your elusive technique â something his infinity couldn't recognize.
He had grown so much stronger since your last sparing session. All of the training and missions had done him well. His chiseled body felt heavier against you. His grip was tighter. He was faster, stronger, and smarter.
Strangely enough, Satoru was mostly silent during this fight. He didn't taunt you or call you pathetic like he normally did. Besides his quiet grunts and growls from blows or primal rage, he was deadly silent.
This was serious to him. This wasn't like a fight with a meaningless curse. This wasn't like a cute little sparring session with you back in the day. This was you, and your role in his life. He would be damned before he let you fucking quit and leave him.
"Come here." His voice was deeper, rougher â predatory almost as he went in for another submission. His eyes were trained on you, and he had one objective in his mind: to keep you.
You slipped up, misjudging Satoru's distance from you. Before you could evade him, Satoru's large calloused palms gripped the underside of your thighs, and he lifted your body up with ease, shoving your back against the wall.
"You done?" He growled lowly against your ear, his breath fanning against your skin. His chest was rising and falling harshly. He was also bruised, but he'd fight you for the rest of eternity if it meant you wouldn't leave him.
Your breath was faster than his â literally panting as you took the moment of reprieve and rested against the wall. It had been so long since you too had sparred, you almost forgot how handsy he could be with you in the middle of fights.
His slender waist was between your thighs, still only covered by his grey sweat pants. His abs were glistening in sweat, and his hips created a perfect V dipping into his waistband. You instinctively had your legs wrapped around him â making him support your weight.
"I'm not going to let you win." Your voice is low and shaky from the fight. Your nerves were wound up after the night you had.
"Then, stay. Keep fighting me." His body pressed closer to yours. If anyone walked in on you two, it would definitely appear as if you two were doing things other than fighting.
"He needs me, Satoru..." You murmur, turning your head away from his. Suguru said it himself. He needed you. Satoru just wanted you to keep playing catch up with him.
Satoru's jaw clenched, and he pushed your back against the wall harder. He supported your weight with one of his hands and his waist as his other hand roughly grabbed your jaw. His fingers digging into the soft skin of your cheeks, forcing you to look at him.
"If he needed you so fucking badly, why did he leave you here with me?"
You look at him with lost eyes as the reality of the situation finally starts to sink in. Your big brother, Suguru, had changed into someone you could hardly recognize. You tense â immediately trying to push those thoughts out of your head.
He can recognize that you're still trying to deny it. He jolts your body a bit, making your eyes snap open to look at him again.
"I need you, yn." His voice is raw. He's almost pleading with you. He sounds so convincing, but you can't help but doubt him.
"No, you don't..." You whisper as tears sting your eyes. Suguru didn't need you. He hadn't even bothered to call or text you. If he needed you so much, why didn't he reach out?
"Oh really?" Satoru lets out a humorless laugh. "So, I'm just fighting you at three in the morning for fun? I'm just fighting to keep you here with me for the thrill of it." His hand is unwavering on your jaw, forcing you to look him in the eyes as he speaks.
His eyes look so tired and drained. If you left, how would he have any moments rest. He's barely sleeping now as it is, and if you leave, he'll have to take on your missions on top of everything else.
But something tells you it's not even about that. This fight is the closest thing he's felt to human connection in months.
The rawness of his tone and emotion tugs at your heart strings, but it still feels like youâre giving up to him.
âFighting at three in the morning sounds typical for you. You just donât want to lose your favorite punching bag.â You spit back at him.
His hand â so pale and veiny â trails down from your jaw to your neck, and he squeezes just hard enough to make you feel all tingly inside. âIs that what you think? Do I need to fuck some sense into you?â
Your face warms from his crude words, and your hands squeeze his shoulders. His lips curl into a smirk as he witnesses your inner struggle, but he knows the truth. His six eyes know your tell: the way your thighs squeeze around him as if youâre trying to subdue your arousal.
He knows good and well that your pretty cunt is weeping for him, but heâs not going to give into yours or his own desires yet.
âI didnât fight Nanami when he left.â His voice is back to a steady state, speaking the words carefully to ensure you understand what heâs trying to convey. âI even had the opportunity to fight Suguru to come back. I didnât.â
Your heart fluttered in your chest, making it feel like your stomach flipped upside down. You want to open your mouth to speak â to demand to know why he didnât fight them to stay, but his hand was still firmly wrapped around your slender throat, holding you back from talking.
âHow dense can you be, princess? Itâs always been you. No one else.â A heady whisper against your ear. His hand subtly relaxes on your throat.
Then, you remember all the looks he gave you when youâd ask Suguru for help. You remember the times he would fight or outright just butt into your conversations, demanding to be the center of your attention.
âI knew you wouldnât win, but even if you did, I lied. Iâd still chase you. I wouldnât be able to live with myself if I just let you slip past me.â
âAsshole.â You finally managed to speak, earning a dark chuckle from him.
Thwak!
His hand that had been supporting you slapped against your bottom. The familiar sting causing you to let out a breathy gasp.
âYou really donât know when to quit, do you princess?â His hand unabashedly caresses your bottom, soothing the pain.
âI don't think you'd like me as much if I did." You respond gripping onto his shoulders as your body is under his control.
Thwak!
"Probably right about that." He murmurs before he leans into you. His pale blue eyes were half-lidded as he took you in. He's grown tired of denying himself. He's devoted his life to Jujutsu. Now, he just wants to finally do the things he wants to do, and you just so happen to be at the top of his list. "Are you going to play nice, or do I need to keep reminding you who's in control here?"
âIâm letting you have control.â You hiss. Probably not the wisest decision, since Gojo merely lets out a dark laugh. His hand tightens back around your throat, and your back hits the wall with a small thud.
âYouâre going to eat your words, sweets.â He mumbles lowly, towering over you as he has full control over your body. âDo you know how long Iâve been waiting for this? Do you even know what you do to me?â
His hardened length presses right against your core as if on cue, and he lets out a small groan from the contact. You bite back a noise that would let on your arousal because fuck⊠youâre wetter than you should be right now.
Too bad Satoru already knows the truth behind your flushed face and heaving chest. His six eyes really give him the advantage.
âIâm going to have fun with you, princess.â He quietly laughs as he drags his hips up and down, giving you the smallest bit of friction and pleasure. Both of you let out respective pants and noises â both of you were such a mess for each other.
Just when you were finally getting use to his rhythm, Satoru pulled back harshly, letting your feet touch the floor once more. Your legs subtly tremble as you stand on your own. You were still so exhausted from the fight, and now, you were feeling needy on top of it. It was like a perfect mixture for disaster.
You clench your jaw, not wanting to just give into him just because he said some really thoughtful words and looks so devilishly handsome. Sure, you were probably going to fuck him if he kept going, but you were not about to sit there and beg him to fuck you. Thereâs a perfectly good vibrator stashed in your duffle bag for this exact reason.
You start to walk towards the doors. Though, you werenât planning on going to Suguru. Youâd just⊠go stew in your dorm about how infuriating Gojo is, and then youâd get your frustrations out in a different manner.
âOh no you donât.â He says with a playful nature as he roughly grabs you right back up in his arms. âGonna make me really work for it, arenât you princess?â He carries you, despite your honestly pitiful attempts at getting away from him, and he bends you over one of the bleachers in the training area.
âSato-â
âShut up.â He lowly growled before grabbing something out of his pocket. His black blindfold crumpled in his hand before he reached over your back. One of his large hands grabbed your jaw, forcing your mouth open, and his other hand shoved his blindfold into your mouth.
âIf you spit that out, Iâm replacing it with my cock.â He warns lowly before letting out a small laugh at your panicked expression. Your face is so red from pure embarrassment of the situation. It doesn't help when Satoru's large gruff hands grab ahold of your shorts and yank them down to your ankles. Anyone could walk in here right now. Sure, it was late at night, but Yaga was notoriously a light sleeper.
Before you could even think about spitting out his blindfold and cussing him out, a harsh slap clapped against your bottom. Your teeth clamped down on the blindfold, masking a husky moan. Satoru definitely had a bit of an obsession with spanking you.
His eyes devoured you as your ass rippled. His hand gently rubbed your poor abused flesh before he spanked your other cheek. Your body jolted forward. A small muffled whine came from your lips, but Satoru knew you loved this.
You were practically dripping all over the bleachers for crying out loud. "Messy girl~" He taunted with a small laugh. "I think she's cryin' for it, sweets. She wants a spanking too."
You quickly start to shake your head, your body tensing at the thought. His fingertips gently smacked your drooling cunt, causing for an obscene wet noise to infiltrate your ears. You can't even stop the moan that's muffled from his blindfold. Your vision goes a bit blurry from tears of stimulation and slight pain, but fuck, it makes you clench around nothing. You were practically aching to be filled.
"Mmm~ you liked that didn't you, princess?" His hand rubs over your ass, groping you so shamelessly. "One day you might actually learn that I know your body better than you do..."
His finger trailed between your soaking wet folds, spreading your wetness around your clit, drawing out a shaky moan from you. Your legs started to lightly jitter, and it felt like your knees would give in any moment now.
"Poor, poor thing. You look like a newborn deer trying to learn how to walk." He taunted as his fingers circled around your entrance.
You were half tempted to spit the damn blindfold out, but you knew Satoru wouldn't hesitate to keep you gagging around his cock for hours if you kept being disobedient.
Another small slap to the button of nerves sent you forward. Your eyes fell shut as you savored the sensations tingling straight from your core. Your knees went inwards, and you had to support your body with your arms on the bleachers.
"That's it... Who's a good girl?" Satoru breathily purred from behind you. You were such a fucking beauty like this, finally caving in to your desires. You wanted this as much as he did. There was no point in denying it. His fingers went back to rubbing tight circles around your clit to soothe the little painful shocks.
You couldn't even formulate the words to tell him just where he could shove his dick. His ministrations felt like pure heaven, and your stomach tightened slightly. If he didn't slow down, you were sure god was going to come down and pluck you from the Earth.
Seeing the accumulation of energy with his six eyes, Satoru knew exactly what was going on. He smirked as he continued rubbing the swollen numb between his fingers. Your poor wet pussy making the wettest clacking noises he's ever heard. His mouth was practically watering for a taste.
Dropping to his knees behind you, Satoru wasted no time burying his face directly into your cunt. He immediately went to work, using his fat tongue to lap up all of your delicious juices. He gave you tender kisses of encouragement.
"See how you're treated when you're being good?" He taunted lowly right against your cunt. The vibration from his words had you clawing at the bleachers for mercy.
You whined and slightly thrashed, trying to fight the orgasm that was threatening to take over. It was too much- You couldn't cum all over Satoru's face right where you two had spent the most time at each other's throats!!
His tongue prodded at your entrance, and he moaned as he felt your wet velvet heat. You were made to house his cock in there -- he knew it. He'd always been god's favorite, so it made sense that god would bestow such a wonderful woman with the most delicious pussy to him.
His thumb rubbed tight circled around your clit as his tongue flicked in and out. It wasn't a minute later before you were basically gushing into his mouth. A muffled squeal left your throat, and you tried to claw away. Your cunt clenched and clenched, and Satoru nearly pitied your slutty pussy. It really just needed to be filled with dick. His dick.
His hands braced your thighs as he gave you a few more sweet kisses straight to your core before he stood up. He slid himself between you and the bleachers so he could hold you up. Your body collapsed against his chest, and you panted heavily. Not even your best vibrator and favorite smutty book could get that sort of orgasm out of you.
"Don't bite me." He warned with a ragged laugh before his fingers delved between your lips and pulled the blindfold out of your mouth. You didn't have the energy or resolve to even say anything to him. Instead, you opted to bury your face in his bare chest.
"My poor princess. Did I wear you out?" His voice was still teasing, even though he literally knew that he just made you see stars.
"Shut up, 'toru." You mutter into his chest, causing for his heart to swell. He loved that nickname, and he loved how you were like a cat pretending like you didn't like being pet by him.
His fingers pressed beneath your chin, and he pulled you up to look at him. Now, his dick was swelling from how precious your face since you were so fucked out already. Wordlessly, he leaned down and pressed his lips against yours.
Your heart slammed against your ribcage. Getting your pussy ate from the back by him was one thing, but now, he was being all sweet and kissing you?? You can remember all of his sweet words and how he looked when he said them. He was being genuine. He really had feelings for you this entire time.
You wanted to stomp your foot on his toe for taking so long to finally tell you, but his kiss was so sweet and intoxicating. You took a deep breath before intertwining your lips with his.
The sound of lips smacking together filled the training area. You felt the air shift around you. Your passion started to burn hot within the kiss. Both of you chased each others' lips like it was a goddamn need â not a want. Your head actually started to spin as he gripped your jaw and started to nip at your bottom lips with his teeth.
You pulled back - nervous as to why you didn't feel good. Your eyes widened as you took in the change of environment. You were in Satoru's dorm, sat upon his bed. His room was surprisingly clean and warmly lit by a Himalayan salt rock lamp right next to his bed.
"Sorry sweets, I felt like taking this somewhere more private." Satoru merely laughed as his body towered over yours. "I wanted to be able to take my time with you." His voice dropped down an octave, whispering into your ear before pressing a kiss to your cheek.
Your heart fluttered in your chest as you watched him hook his thumbs into the waistband of his grey sweatpants. They did absolutely fuck all to hide how his dick was straining directly against the fabric. He had a huge tent right in his pants, and his cock had created a small dark stain right on his crotch area from leaking copious amounts of pre-cum.
Once his pants were down, your eyes marveled at just how pretty his cock looked in the warm glow of the lamp. His dick was long, and he had such pretty veins decorating the underside and side of his cock. His tip was flushed a pretty cherry red, and he had a pearl of pre-cum leaking from his slit.
"Aw you flatter me, sweets~" Satoru laughed as he petted the top of your head, affectionately ruffling your hair. You scowled up at him, only making him laugh more. There was nothing like seeing you all defiant and pissy with him... except for seeing you all fucked out and pliant under him.
"C'mon~ give it a kiss." He demanded as his long fingers tightened around your hair, guiding your plush lips straight to his dick. You would rather die than give into him like this. Your legs kicked out from you, kicking him straight in the shin.
He hissed quietly from the pain before giving you a dark grin. "You know, I wanted our first time to be sweet and passionate, but you make it real fucking hard to be nice to you, princess." He let go of your head before shoving you back onto the bed.
"Maybe because you make it real fucking hard to want to be nice to you." You retorted as your eyes narrowed. He settled between your legs with a small grunt. Even while you were arguing with him, your cunt was still soaked.
He was almost tempted to take the words out of your mouth by giving you more of his tongue, but his cock had been neglected long enough. "You didn't seem to have a problem after I gave you your best orgasm." He commented with a lopsided grin.
You stayed still against his bed swallowing harshly. Were you two really about to...? Just hours ago, it felt like you two were trying to kill each other. Hell, two days ago, it felt like he had forgotten you even existed.
"This doesn't make up for anything, Satoru." You warned as you kept your gaze hardened. Your body was to receptive to him to deny that you wanted... needed him, so you weren't even going to deny yourself the pleasure that he could give anymore. But this didn't make up for the fact that he had seemingly left you behind for months...
even if he only did that so you didn't have to bare the weight of his mistakes with the star plasma vessel..
even if he only worked himself to death so you could try to focus on your studies instead of being thrusted into being overworked with missions after Suguru and Nanami dropped out...
No, this didn't make up for any of that.
His touch softened as he cupped your cheek in his hand. His thumb stroked your smooth skin, gazing down at you like he was holding the world in his hands. It made you want to squirm and hide.
"So, this is meaningless for you?" He whispered quietly into your ear as his cock slipped between your sopping folds, grinding the underside of his length against you.
Your words got caught in your throat as you gasped for air. You felt your face immediately warm. Shit, you hated feeling this vulnerable... especially in front of your sworn rival.
"Am I only as useful as that cute little vibrator you stowed in your get-away back?" Satoru continued. His hips rocked back and forth, and you found yourself getting squirmy with each time his tip bumped against your entrance.
He was just too damn big to slip inside. It'd take work and lots of perseverance. Luckily, Satoru seemed to be surprisingly patient in that regard.
He groaned as he felt your slick coating his cock. Your body was fucking made for him: made to be his counter and made to take his cock.
You hid your face in his muscular shoulder, stifling a small whine. Damn his six eyes. That vibrator was a godsend some nights when you were stuck being alone.
"Answer me, princess." He drawled as one of his hands reached back to hold your head gently as if he were embracing you. His hips kept a steady rhythm, driving you mad.
"N-no..." You stuttered out, cursing your voice for betraying your arousal.
"Aw, sweets." He cooed in your ear, moving his hips with a bit more conviction now â testing the waters of pressing his giant cockhead against your entrance before going back to dry humping you.
You let out of noise of frustration, hating how easily it was for him to tease you like this. You knew it was going to hurt, but fuck, you were going to cry if you didn't get some relief soon.
"Shh, shh, I'm gonna give you what you need, sweets." He whispered into your ear, pressing a tender kiss to your cheekbone. "You gotta be a good girl for me though."
His arms cradled you as he peppered your neck in kisses. Your hips were rolling to meet his with each thrust. The slickest noises between you two filled the room as his long cock continued to rub against you.
"I'll b-be good, please." You finally choked out, giving up on arguing with him. You were too desperate now. There was no point in trying to hide it.
Satoru doesn't even attempt to hide his smug reaction to you being all submissive and needy underneath him. He drags his hips all the way back until he pushed himself forward â splitting you wiiide open for him.
"Fuck!" He groaned as your tight wet heat enveloped him, practically sucking you straight inside your sloppy pussy. One of his hands reached up and gripped the headboard for support. His back muscles flexed from the new positioning.
"Sh-shit-! Wait, T-toru... ah~! It's not g'nna fit!" You cried out, nails digging into his flesh as you tried to cope with the intrusion of his thick cock.
"Should've thought about that before you fucking begged for it, princess. Now, you're gonna shut the fuck up and take this dick like a good girl, yeah?" His voice was rough with need â no longer teasing. No, this was just primal domination now.
His cock continued to painstakingly shove it's way between your spongy walls, making room for himself right inside you until he was buried to the hilt. His hand had a vice grip against the headboard, and it took all of his mental fortitude to not bust immediately.
He made the mistake of looking down at you. Goddammit you're too pretty like this while taking his dick so well. Your lips were parted as just a small dribble of drool seeped out of the corner of your mouth. Your eyes were glassed over, and he could've swore he saw hearts in your pupils as you looked up at him.
All your attention was finally on him.
His hips set an unforgiving pace, fucking yours directly down into the mattress as he used his headboard as leverage. At least no one was in the dorms anymore besides you and him. There was no one to bother with how obscenely loud you were whining and moaning for him.
Though, Satoru would've still faced his peers with a shit eating grin the next morning if they still lived here. He was so damn proud to finally have you underneath him.
"T-toruToru~! Toru, oh fuck me~"
"At least that smart mouth of yours is good for something." He growled as his cock continued to rudely bully its way directly to your womb. Your legs were barely able to stay wrapped around him as he pounded his hips against yours.
His white hair stuck to his forehead as sweat started to build up for both of you. He usually hated the feeling, but nothing could tear him away from your sweet, sweet pussy right now.
He huffed as he shoved your legs up onto his shoulders, forcing you into the meanest mating press you could imagine. Your eyes rolled back as you practically kissed your last coherent thought goodbye.
Satoru fucking Gojo was going to had already fucked you stupid.
His cock was ruthless, pressing drabbles of precum directly against your cervix. His hips were practically drilling into you out of sheer muscle memory at this point. He just wanted to rut into until the day he died.
"Yeaaah~ look at you now, princess. Ngh.. can't talk back to me now, can ya? Did Toru fuck that.... mmm- poor little brain of yours stupid?" His hand let go from the headboard, gripping your cheeks with his pointer finger and thumb to make you look up at him. Your mouth parted for him as you gazed up at him.
He gathered a small bit of saliva in his mouth before he directly spit into yours, earning a wanton moan from your lips.
The bed continued to squeak and rattle from the repeated abuse. The headboard was now knocking against the wall without his hand to stop it.
"T-toru.." You cried, trying to warn him of how your tummy was tightening. It felt like every cell of your body was working for this orgasm. Your back arched as you felt yourself tighten around him.
He was already ten steps ahead of you, literally seeing your orgasm before it came. "Cum on my cock, princess. Go ahead. 's okay. I got you." He murmured into your ear right before he felt your gushy walls constricting around him, practically trying to milk his cock.
Goddamn, was it working.
A groan ripped through the air as his dick pulsed inside you. He had been holding on for all this time. He couldn't stop the groans and whimpers that fell from his lips as he finally let go and filled your cute cunt to the brim with his warm cum,
You two stayed still, catching your breaths, and neither of you dared to talk and ruin the moment. It was a silent agreement. Neither of you could fight the attraction between you two any longer.
"I missed you." You finally spoke up quietly. Satoru was vulnerable earlier after the fight. It was your turn now.
"I know." He responded quietly. He regretted taking so many missions and hiding from you. It was his way of trying to make the best out of a shitty situation, but all it did was make both of you unhappy. His nose nudged your cheek gently. "I missed you too."
His lips pressed soft kisses along your jaw. He would take more time later today to fully explain the breadth of his feelings for you, but for now, he was happy to pamper you in affections and aftercare until you fell asleep from overexertion.
Also... he would definitely have to make up some sort of story to tell Yaga and explain why your duffle bag was still in the training area... and why it had a pink vibrator inside.
FUCK FINALLY THE END.
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fanfic#fanfic#jjk suggestive#drabble#jjk gojo#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#satoru x reader#satoru smut#satoru gojo smut#gojo x reader smut#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x you#gojou satoru x reader#gojo x reader#gojo smut#gojo x you#gojo jjk#jujutsu satoru#gojo saturo#jjk satoru#jujutsu kaisen gojo#jjk smut#smut
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Okay, now I need a fic based on the session the reader and Logan has when he was slapped. Like the thought of her passing out and he still continued to fuck her? And her coming too and heâs just pumping her full of his come? Lord have mercy đ©đ€€
me getting this anon while i was knee-deep in writing angst is something so funny to me, crying my eyes out then opening my inbox to see this gave me mental whiplash like you canât believe He barely sounds human, more man than beast. The weight of him pins you into the bed, unable to move. The creaking of the bed, your weak cries, his downright animalistic grunts of pleasure as he thrusts into your tired, achy cuntâyou two sound like a cheap porno, and not in a good way.
You have no one else to blame for the six foot wall of muscle that pins you to the bed, holds your hands behind your back and fucks you like heâs got something to prove. His hips meet your backside again, and again, and againâeach thrust leaving your ass raw.
You donât know how long itâs been since heâs put you on your stomach, and you donât care to know; all you want is for him to keep going. Hell, youâre not sure Logan would stop even if you begged him.
Reduced to his animal instincts, if heâs not panting in your ear like a bitch in heat heâs mumbling the filthiest fucking words into your skin, tongue lapping at the salt that clings to it.
âMine, mine, mine,â he groans, each word emphasized by the sound of skin slapping on skin. âMy girl, mine to fuck, mine to breed.â
It genuinely hurts to breathe, but all you scratching at his arms does is spur him even further. Eventually you give up, lie back like a good little whore and let him fuck you until either you pass out or he runs out of energy.
Unsurprisingly, option A seems to happen first.
A few spots in your vision, a ringing in your ears, then nothing. An unknown time passes, and you wake up in the same spot as before, spread open and speared on Loganâs magnificent dick.
At least from what you can gather heâs a bit more put together now, still pumping himself inside your warm walls, but much less violent than he was before. You feel the familiar thrum of orgasm on the horizon, an odd sort of pleasure-pain that keeps you aware long enough to listen to your boyfriend speak.
ââM sorry baby, fuck, just couldnât stop,â he says, kissing up and down your spine in apology, still chasing after his own high with each word. âFeel too good, so, so good, goddamnââ
Heâs stuttering, cutting himself off, unable to string together a full sentence. You chance a glance at him and fuck, heâs a goddamn mess. Sweat dripping from his brow, muscles flexing so hard you could count each vein, a rosey blush running from his face to his chestâhe looks like heâs just came from hell and back. Damn near incoherent, whispering sweet nothings into your shoulderâ
âLemme come in you baby, just one more time, one more fuckinâ timeââ
Itâs a rhetorical question at this point; like you ever had a choice with the way his cum drips from your cunt. So full of him that each thrust pulls more out of you, only to be replaced. Heâs had to have cum inside of you multiple times, the sloppy sound of it mixing with the sound of his balls slapping against your ass.
And yet, he keeps on going.
An urge to control, to keep, a need to stuff his cock inside of you and have you know exactly who it is that has your pussy creaming for him.
#Iâm gonna be honest with you I forgot this was in my drafts#Iâm so sorry anon!#hopefully the wait was worth it â€ïž#robo writes#ask#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut
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my GOD this was so hot I need someone to ice bucket challenge me bc PHEWđ„”
i was supposed to sweat you out (rooster x f!reader)
pairing: bradley rooster bradshaw x fem!reader (no y/n)
synopsis: reader is totally not jealous that her FWB is being hit on at the hard deck.
word count: 3.8k
warnings: 18+ explicit content, minors DNI: spitting, unprotected sex, non negotiated breeding kinkâfriendly reminder this is a work of FICTION oh my god use protection and communicate explicitly with your partner beforehand please please please-- explicit PiV sex, a bit of dumbification, m!receiving oral sex
A/N: help i blacked out and wrote almost 4k of rooster smut who even am i listen, i also know it's not original, but i wanted to write frantic territorial sex and this is where it got us. also...don't think too hard about the parallels between this and can't unfeel that okay i'm too repressed to process tysm also yes title is from glitch by TAS
You werenât jealous.Â
Jealous was for people with feelings, and if you had feelings about fucking your team lead, then you were stupid, in addition to giving Uncle Sam everything he needed to court martial you.Â
So, no, you werenât jealous.Â
But the tightness in your stomach as a girl sat next to Rooster on the piano was awfully uncomfortable.Â
She wasnât even out of line, that was the worst part. She looked nice, she looked like a decent human, and she was pretty, if you were into the girl next door kinda look.Â
Which Rooster historically was.Â
She was sitting at a perfectly respectful distance, her sundress was a perfectly respectful length, her face was open and curious and pure and it made you want to stomp over to the piano in the middle of the Hard Deck, and rub yourself all over Bradleyâs hawaiian shirt until he remembered that as pretty as she was, he liked himself around you better.
You made yourself look away, tipping your wrist so the soda water and ice remaining in your glass rattled around.
He wasnât yours.Â
You knew he wasnât, just like you knew jealousy was irrational, but it was hard because sometimesâŠsometimes he acted like it though.Â
Like when you nearly passed out from cramps and heâd brought over a spare set of sheets while he washed yours, and then wedged himself around you in your tiny bed, so you could know you werenât alone in the pain. Or when he left a lemon lavender cupcake in your locker, even though no one was supposed to know it was your birthday, because you hated the way people made a big fuss out of nothing. Or the way he looked up at you, awestruck and beautiful, every time you came on his fingers, sobbing his name.Â
You set your glass down on the bar, louder than you intended, but suddenly everything seemed loud. You didnât have to stay here, in fact, you needed to get out. Out of the Hard Deck, away from the bright lights and happy people being happy, and no one moping over their fuckbuddies who definitely didnât have feelings for themâ
When the back door opened, you breathed in deep, cool air rushing off the sea and over you and bringing a momentary reprieve. The door swung shut behind, and as it closed, the din of the bar muted, and you let that breath out slowly, wrapping your arms around yourself. You just needed a minute, a moment to calm the hell down, and forget about the distracting man at the piano whom you had no business being distracted by.
You heard the door creak open behind you and you tipped your head back to glare at the universe at large, because without turning around, you knew exactly who had come outside after you.Â
âHey,â Bradleyâs voice was just gentle enough to make your heart clench, because it wasnât his fault that he was so impossibly kind, it had you falling in love with him, âyou okay? You ran out of there pretty quick.â
âIâm fine,â you said, sounding just as prickly as you felt, pushing down any sense of flattery that heâd been aware of your presence, and your leaving.Â
âYou sound fine,â Bradley said cheerily, coming to stand beside you. You wanted to laugh with him because you both knew you were being dramatic, but you also wanted to shove him like you were 5 on a playground, too full of big feelings to know how to handle them.Â
âI said Iâm fine, Bradley,â you bit out. âGo back inside, okay, Iâm fine.â
He was quiet for a moment, and when you looked over at him, you knew it was a mistake. He was watching you carefully, his brown eyes focused and concerned, a divet in the middle of his forehead where his brows were squished together, making him simultaneously the cutest and hottest, and also the most annoying, for being so handsome while he was clearly worried.Â
âHoney, we gotta talk about itââ he started, but the endearment broke something inside of you, the way he said it like he meant it, like this was real.Â
âIâm not your honey, Bradley,â you snapped, turning to face him fully. âWeâre friends, right, that was the whole deal, so letâs not pretend likeââ
Something flashed in Bradleyâs eyes and a moment later his large hands cupped your face as he crashed into you, kissing your gasped breath out of you.Â
It wasnât your fault your knees nearly buckled.Â
It wasnât your fault that the hands you meant to push him away with instead curled into the material of that stupid technicolor shirt, pulling him closer to you.Â
It wasnât your fault that he tasted like heaven, like rum and coke and intoxicating, and months of habit had you chasing his taste with your tongue.Â
You didnât realize you were walking backwards until your back hit the outside wall of the Hard Deck, and still Bradley covered you. His neck was bent at a horrible angle to meet your lips, but he didnât seem to mind, melding his body into yours, pressing into you with a familiar urgency.Â
His tongue traced over your lips and you opened for him, a whimper escaping you when Bradley hummed with appreciation. His hands slipped from your face to behind your head, his knuckles protecting your head from the scrape of the brick wall, and he rocked into you before pulling back.Â
You felt his breath against your lips and you opened your eyes slowly, needing a moment before you could focus on him.Â
Christ, he was just so pretty.Â
Hair unruly from your fingers, cheeks flushed from kissing you, chest rising unsteadily and his tongue darting out to wet his lips, like a tease.Â
âNow,â he said, his voice gruffer than itâd been a minute ago, âare you done riding my dick for something I donât even know I did wrong?â
It was an expression.
You knew that, of course it was an expression, but Bradley was pressing you into a wall with his demigod body, and heâd said it in that voice, the one you knew how it felt against your skin, so all you could manage was, âCan I?â
For a moment, Bradley looked confused, bless him.Â
Then he huffed out a disbelieving breath, like you were too good to be true, lifting a hand from behind your head to rake it through his hair, before looking back at you.Â
âYou mean that, donât you?â he asked, his voice somehow even lower. âOut here in the open, youâd let me fuck you?â
You shivered at his words, nodding stupidly, and were rewarded by another kiss. This one was just as unexpected as the first, but Bradleyâs lips gentle against yours as he coaxed an answering softness out of you.Â
It was too sweet.
Too tempting, too delicious, to let yourself have tenderness that you knew wasnât real, and you needed to get a hold of yourself, fast.Â
Bradley was still being so damn gentle, so it was easy to push his hands away from you, sink to your knees on the sand-covered asphalt outside of the bar. Bradley fell forward, catching himself on the arm braced on the wall, his forehead resting in the crook of his elbow.Â
âHoney, you donât have toââ he started, but his hips bucked forward when your fingers started undoing his belt.Â
âI want to,â you told him, meaning it too much to care how breathless your voice sounded.Â
Your hand slipped into his pants, palming his length over his briefs and you both groaned softly. He wasnât fully hard, not yet, but that was better anyways, let you work him up. He was warm, heavy even at half mast, and it took everything in you not to purr when you pulled him out. You looked up at him, tilting your head.Â
âHelp me out?â you asked coyly, sticking your tongue out, and Bradleyâs hips jutted forward again when he realized what you were asking.Â
âYouâre something else,â he murmured, his voice a heady mix of arousal and wonder. The hand that wasnât keeping him from hitting the wall traced down your cheek, ending at your jaw and tipping your chin up.Â
You were already salivating and when Bradley spit, you moaned, your thighs clenched together as you drooled your combined saliva onto his cock. Bradley grunted, then whispered something to himself as you smoothed your hand over him, the glide made easier by your spit. Already, you could feel him stiffening, and you readjusted to take him in your mouth.Â
It was never a gentle fit.Â
Bradley was the kind of thick that he always stretched out your jaw, but, God, did you relish it. As your lips wrapped around the head of his dick, Bradley moaned, the most beautiful sound. You loved how vocal he was, loved how he sounded, how he felt. You tightened your lips, tongue swirling over the tip of him, teasing until you tasted a hint of salt in your mouth, and then it was your turn to moan. Â
You tipped your head back, encouraging him to slide him deeper into your mouth, your fist twisting around the portion of his cock that didnât fit in your mouth.Â
âShit, honey, that mouthâŠâ Bradley gritted, his voice muffled in his arm. The hand that had tipped up your chin went around to your cheek, and his hips shifted again when he could feel you hollowing your cheeks out.Â
The motion pushed him deeper towards your throat and you gagged, but kept him in your mouth, soothed by the shaky cadence of Bradleyâs breath over you.Â
âSo damn good for me, arenât you, honey?â he breathed. âSo warm and tight; feels so goodâŠâ
Your thighs clenched again, and you felt yourself growing wet as his praise washed over you. You held your breath, determined to take more of him, and Bradley grunted as you pulled on his cock with your hand, feeding him into your mouth.Â
âNeed more, honey?â he asked, somehow still cocky, though you could hear the tremor of desire in his voice. âGod, you love being stretched on my dick, donât you?â
You moaned instead of nodding, wishing it wasnât true but also wishing heâd push deeper. Your hands flexed on his thighs, still covered in his jeans, but so thick and warm, even through the denim. Fuck, the size of him was overwhelmingâhis heavy cock in your mouth, those muscled thighs under your fingersâŠyou held your breath and you let go of the base of him.Â
Bradley let out a choked gasp as you took him deeper, your nose brushing his pubic hair as he slid down your throat. You were gonna lose your voice and be so damn sore, but it was worth it for the groan that ripped out of Bradley.Â
âFuck fuck fuckââ he gritted, all cockiness gone as he let go of your cheek, bracing himself against the wall. You knew it was taking everything to not rut into you, and you half appreciated it because you werenât sure you could take it, but you almost wanted him without restraint, just using you, lost in you.Â
You hummed around him, and Bradley made a sound youâd never heard before, like a whine and gasp, and then he was pushing himself off the wall, pulling out of you, and wrapping his hands under your arms, pulling you to your feet.Â
âFuck, honey, you wreck me,â he rasped, kissing you almost angrily. You whimpered as you opened for him, and you felt his tongue sweeping through you, searching for his taste in your mouth.Â
You felt so empty, too much air and too little of his cock, and you reached for him between you. You felt him jolt when your hand closed around him, stroking over him, and then Bradley was reaching between both of you, shoving his hand into your underwear.Â
âHow wet am I going to find you, honey? Bet youâre just drenched arenât you, just that hungry for my cockâfuck.â
Bradley broke off when his fingers swept into your panties, and you gasped at the glorious contact.Â
His fingers were so good, thick and long and calloused just right, and he was absolutely correct: you were all but dripping for him. Bradley pulled his fingers through your folds, pulling your arousal up to your clit and petting gentle circles around it. Your head fell back against the wall at his ministrations, perfect to the point of painful, almost forgetting you held his cock in your hand.Â
You tightened your grip around him, and Bradley grunted before he matched your pace with his fingers. You felt your knees shaking, and Bradley wound another hand around your ass, before lifting to brace you against the wall. With your feet off the ground, your balance was entirely dependent upon him, and it brought new pressure to the pattern his fingers were tracing over you.Â
His touch was maddening.Â
Light and knowing, direct and perfect, enough to drive you wild with pleasure but not to get you there, and he knew it.Â
âBradley,â you whispered against his mouth, begged, and the bastard chuckled, but he pulled his hand out of your panties, just long enough to push them to the side, before pulling his lips away from you.Â
âShit, honey, I donât have aââ
âIn me, Rooster,â you snapped, surprised and yet absolutely not surprised by the fact that your eyes felt full. You were desperate for him, it was embarrassing, but you needed him so damn bad, for reasons you didnât dare say, and if he waited for something else, you didnât think you could bear it. âPlease, fucking please, I need youââÂ
âShh honey, youâre okay,â Bradley soothed, one of his hands brushing your hair away from your face, a gentle thumb wiping at your eyes. His gentleness made you more desperate, your hips canting towards him. âAre you sure?â
âSo sure, please,â you whimpered, your face feeling hot, your thighs shaking. God you were coming undone, like you were just a giant nerve ending that was just need, desperate, hunger, desire.Â
âCourse, honey,â Bradley soothed, his lips brushing against your cheeks, kissing your tears away, his tongue caressing your skin. âIâve got you, baby, youâre okay.âÂ
You didnât think you were, but then his thick cock was at your entrance and you couldâve sobbed in relief. He was hot, you could feel him leaking and you needed him to be so deep inside you. You tried to work your hips down on him, but Bradleyâs grip on you was stern, and you couldnât coax him any faster.
As it was, it still felt like too much.Â
The stretch of him, the closeness, the way he knew just how to soothe you and fuck you and none of it was real and even when he slowly worked you down onto his cock, you were still shaking.Â
âPlease, please,â you whined, trying to move, and crying out in frustration when Bradley didnât succumb. âShit, Bradley, please, fuck me like you mean it.â
He growled, fucking growled, the sexiest sound out of a litany of choices, and Bradleyâs hips jerked back before he drove into you. Your head hit the brick wall, he was so perfect and he hit you just right, so good, and almost perfect enough to drown out the thoughts in your head.Â
âLike I mean it, huh,â Bradley grunted, pulling out, the drag feeling like suction with how wet you were, how tightly you were clenching around him. âLike I mean it when I say youâre killing me, is that what you mean? Like Iâm going insane every second this pretty pussy isnât tight around me, like I canât think straight if I donât have the taste of you on my tongue, or know the taste of me isnât on yours?â
He punctuated each question with a thrust, fucking the answers out of your head, and all you could think was yes and more and please.Â
âOh you like that, donât you, baby?â Bradley said, his forehead dropping to your shoulder as he lifted you higher up the wall. Your back scraped against the bricks but you didnât care, you couldnât focus on anything other than the perfect drag of his cock inside you, so close to you. âI think you like that, I think you like knowing how much you own me, how in my head you are, how even when itâs me filling you. Youâre fucking everywhere, all around me, all the time.â
His thrusts pushed you higher, bits of sand and brick grating at your skin and it grounded you, centered you so you didnât come undone at the words coming out of him.Â
You were still thinking too much.Â
He was so deep, so good, but you stillâŠyou reached for him blindly, one of your hands finding one of his, bringing it to your throat.Â
âFuck, honey,â Bradley groaned, his fingers tightening slightly and you traced your hand down the back of his hands, moaning when you felt the veins on the back of his hand. He didnât squeeze tight, just enough to remind you he was there, and that he could, and just the thought had a coil tightening in your core, tingles spreading through your toes and fingers.Â
âBradley,â you whimpered, tears squeezing out of your eyes. âBaby, that feels so good, feels like yours, pleaseââ
Bradley moaned into your skin, his lips latching onto your pulse point and sucking, and you keened, your back arching off the wall. The stretch of his cock was pulling your panties across your clit, and the driving press of him inside of you was so good, you could barely hear what he was whispering.Â
âIs that what you want, honey?â he whispered into your skin. âWant to be mine? Thatâs what it feels like, honey, it feels like my pussy is so wet for me, dripping for this cock. It feels like my clit is so swollen, so desperate for attention; it feels like my girlâs gonna come on my hard fucking cockâŠâ
Yes, yes that was what you wanted.Â
You were already his, he didnât know it, but hearing him say it had your mind going hazy, and your thighs trembling.Â
âThatâs fucking right, baby,â Bradley groaned, âI can feel you clenching down on me, can feel my pussy getting even tighter for me. This doesnât feel like friends, baby, it feels like my girlâs about to come on my cock.Â
You were lost, swimming in a sea of heat and sensation and Bradleyâs words and you were pretty sure you were wailing, praying no one in the Hard Deck could hear you, but even if they could, you werenât stopping. His cock was so deep in you, hitting you just right, and you knew what you needed to cum.Â
âIn me, Bradley,â you managed, your voice a weak whine. âNeed to feel you come, please, fill me up with it.â
âOh, fuck, honey,â Bradley choked, his hand tightening on your throat and his hips working faster. His pace was bruising, overwhelming, perfect and hard and you felt everything in you winding tighter.
âOf course you want my cum, fucking of course, if itâs my pussy, then thatâs where it belongs isnât it? Thatâs how you should be, stuffed so fucking full of me, dripping out of you, marked like mine, fucking mineââ
He was groaning, gasping, his hips speeding up and driving into you, and all you could do was take it, like it was what you were made for. You were boneless, euphoric, and when you felt Bradleyâs hips stutter and his head drop to between your breasts, your orgasm broke over you. Bradley sagged into you, hips working weakly as he thrust his cum into you, and you felt it everywhere, marking you, like he said. You couldnât breathe without him, only knew you were still vertical because he was holding you, and you felt so warm, so held, so full.Â
His.Â
You didnât realize your eyes had closed until you were aware of Bradley asking you to open them. Your feet were on the ground, even though your legs were like a newborn deer, and your back was braced against the wall. Bradley was bent in front of you, brushing away your tears with the back of his hand.Â
âTalk to me, honey,â he said softly, and you heard his voice like an echo, âneed to know youâre okay.â
You nodded slowly, which mustnât have been convincing, because Bradley was still fussing over you, like he hadnât fucked you halfway into a new religion. Â
You knew when he saw your back because of the sound of dismay that burst out of him, and then he was pulling off that damn Hawaiin shirt, brushing gravel off your back while your head hung low between your shoulders, still trying to remember how to breathe.Â
Satisfied that heâd at least brushed the grit out of your skin, Bradley draped his shirt over your shoulders, protecting them, before guiding you to lean back. He licked his lips as his gaze tracked over your face, and you watched him convince himself to say something.Â
âDid you mean it?â he asked quietly, but this time you heard him more clearly. âWouldâŠwould you want that? To be mine?â
It was your turn to stare.Â
How could he doubt it? How was there any question? Not only after what youâd just begged him for, but before then, always, he had to know how good he was, and how all anyone wanted was to be in the light of his sunshine.Â
âObviously,â you said, your voice coming out as an alarming croak. âBut we canât, weââ
Bradley hugged you.Â
It wasnât what you expected.
After everything youâd just done, instigated by stop-talking kisses, there was something astonishingly intimate about Bradley wrapping you in his arms, enfolding you in his embrace, and you felt him relax when your arms hesitatingly wrapped around him too. He was warm, smelled like fresh sweat and you buried your face in the soft cotton of his undershirt. He held you tightly, and you thought he mightâve pressed a kiss to the top of your head, but then his hand was smoothing over your back, gentle, comforting.Â
âWeâll figure it out,â he said, softly. âTogether, okay?â
You nodded, knowing he could feel it, and he held you impossibly closer. It didnât solve it. There were still fraternization rules, still some kind of unofficial vetting process you knew Mav and Ice would put you through, not to mention PennyâŠbut as Bradley held you, you let it be enough.
And maybe it was enough, because, as your body hummed with the reminder of it, you were his.
//
tagging: @callsign-fangirl @bradshawsbitch @mxgyver @withahappyrefrain @teacupsandtopgun @lewmagoo @nancyxsorbet @sebsxphia @laracrofted @roleycoleyreccenter @sushiwriterhere @roosterforme @daggerspare-standingby @callsignvalley @wildbornsiren @hangmanshoney idk most people follow me for hangman and coyote so hope i did okay by roo
#fwb + jealously always has me so weak but the way you wrote this is on another level#đ©đ©đ©#this is EVERYTHING#I live for your hangman & coyote fics but if you write bradley this good too ima lap up anything I can get#bradley rooster bradshaw#bradley bradshaw x reader#top gun: maverick
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Omg omg, can you please do a daddy!chan oneshot x babygirl!reader (pls make them married) based of when the reader cant take his cock(too big)đ©
you can take it. canât you baby?
pairing: daddy!husband!chan x babygirl!reader
genre: smuuuuuut, no plot. oh you guys.. this is filthy. we are so back.
word count: ~1.5k
warnings: daddy kink, praise kink, unprotected sex, squirting, dirty talk, fluffy silly little bit of aftercare at the end
an: oh my gooooodddd i love requests like this. i love thinking about this. i love the opportunity to write shit like this. inject daddy!chan directly into my bloodstream atp. love love LOVE. need him asap. âbig dick chan. big dick chanâ we all chant in unison.
masterlist
⌠âč àŁȘ Ë â ïž âč àŁȘ Ë âŒ adults only âą mdni ⌠âč àŁȘ Ë â ïž âč àŁȘ Ë âŒ
âit doesnât fit again, baby?â he teased. âwe just did this last night.â heâs slowly inching his cock inside you, but not having much luck. the stretch is too much for you. âbabyâs pussy is just soo tight.. huh?â
youâre nodding, doing your best to answer his question, your mouth hanging open, drool pooling on your tongue. heâs already got you fucked out and he hasnât even fucked you yet. âsâtoo much daddy..â you whined. âtooâ too much.â
âi know, baby. daddy knows.â he cooed, pulling out of you, though he was only head deep. âletâs prep you a little better, yeah?â he brings his hand to your face, squeezing your cheeks in between his fingers. your tongue lolls out of your mouth, spit dripping down to your chin. he takes his middle and ring finger and places them on your tongue. you immediately wrap your lips around the digits, swirling your tongue over his skin.
âthere you go, baby. good girl. get em nice and wet.â you moaned around his fingers, the praise shooting right to your core, your pussy dripping onto the sheets. he shoves them deeper into your mouth, down your throat until his knuckles are hitting your teeth and you gag around him. his eyes roll slightly at the sound, struggling to keep his composure when youâre so pliant for him.
he pulls his fingers out, a trail of spit connecting them to your lips as he brings them to your pussy. âletâs try and stretch you out a little, yeah?â he rubs soft circles around your clit, teasing, before he travels lower and plays with your drippy hole. âitâs daddyâs fault for not prepping you better. i just get so excited, baby. i get so excited to feel your little cunt wrapped around me.â he slowly slides his fingers inside, pumping them a few times before spreading his fingers apart, doing his best to stretch your little hole.
âitâs hard for daddy to wait sometimes. i just need my baby so bad.â he speeds up his fingers, curving them to hit the spot he knows you like so much. the sounds coming from your sweet mouth make his cock ache. itâs red and leaking onto his tummy where it rests, not so patiently waiting for its turn. he can feel you starting to flutter around his fingers, your legs beginning to shake. he brings his free hand up to your tummy and gently presses down, making sure you feel everything.
âdaddy..â you cry. âgonna cum..â your little fists grip at the sheets, then grip onto his firm bicep, your nails digging into the muscle thatâs doing most of the work. âb-big one..â you whine.
big one. he knew what that meant and it only made his cock angrier. âbig one, baby? fuck. you havenât done that since our wedding night. mmm. daddy loves it when you do that. you gonna make a mess, sweet girl?â
you held onto him like he was the only thing left anchoring you to this world, rolling your hips up to meet his thrusting fingers. âfuck. thatâs it baby. fuck daddyâs hand. such a perfect girl.â
and then it hit you. it comes in waves, the initial orgasm hitting you, the first little gush of liquid around his fingers and he knows thatâs when to pull them out. and once theyâre out, thatâs when you squirt all over his thighs, his arm, his waiting cock. heâs lucky he doesnât bust right then. he brings his fingers to your clit, quickly rubbing back and forth, coaxing out any little bit of cum thatâs left in you.
you collapse on the bed, completely spent, but ready for more. your hole spasms around nothing, practically begging to be filled. chan hovers over you, placing sweet kisses along your jaw and neck. he lines himself up with your entrance, your warm cum coating his tip. he drags it up and down through your folds, slapping it on your clit a few times. you whimper under him, your body still recovering.
âi think youâre ready now, princess.â he says, the head of his cock poking your hole. âwanna see if you can take it now, baby. daddy knows you can. you can take it, canât you baby?â heâs babbling as he slowly starts to push in. you still feel the stretch but not as much as last time. âthat okay, pretty girl? howâre you doing?â he brushes his fingers across your cheek and your lips. âtalk to me, baby. come back.â
you whimper as he sinks deeper and deeper, the stretch feeling so good, his words feeling even better. âsâgood daddy.â you mumble. âi can do it. iâmâ iâm a good girl, daddy. i can do it. promise.â
he bottoms out, his hips coming in contact with the back of your thighs and he stills, giving you time to adjust and drinking in the feeling of you squeezing him. âthatâs right baby. you are a good girl. such a good girl taking all of daddyâs cock. fuck. letting me stretch out this little pussy.â
after a moment, heâs unable to wait any longer and he begins to rock back and forth, his cock dragging your walls in all the right ways. you can feel every inch, every vein, as he slowly pumps in and out of you. savoring the feeling. he looks down at where your bodies are connected (heh connected. get it? sorry.) and he groans at the sight of the creamy ring of cum that surrounds the base of his cock. heâs not going to last.
âfuck.. baby girl..â he throws his head back, his eyes closing as he focuses on the way you feel around him. and youâre focusing on the way he looks above you. his toned stomach flexes with every thrust he makes, sweat dripping down his chest, his black curls clinging to his forehead. his nose and his full parted lips are enough to bring you close to your high again. you tried to make a mental note in your foggy mind to ride his face next time, feel his nose bumping against your clit. maybe squirt in his mouth. you bet he would like that. you clenched around him at the thought, at the visual of his tiny trail of hair that runs from below his belly button to the base of his cock. âyouâre squeezing me baby. fuck iâm gonna cum.â
he looks back down at you, dark eyes meeting yours as his thrusts become harsher. skin slapping against skin as he pounds into you. he leans down and wraps his arms around your head, protecting your skull from smacking the headboard as he fucks you. âgonna cum in this little pussy baby. gonna fill you up, yeah?â
you nodded, gripping onto his shoulders as you teetered on the edge of your own bliss. âyes daddy. yes please, cum in me.â
âsuch a sweet baby.â he grunted. âusing words like please. begging for daddy.â
âwant your cum. please. please can i have it?â
you were so close. you were sure you would cum with the next words out of his mouth. it didnât matter what he said, as long as he was the one that said it, you were going to cum.
âcan you take it all baby? daddyâs gonna cum but donât- fuck.. donât you let any of it escape.â
and you came, your release squirting around his cock, but he refused to pull out. he kept fucking into you, the wet noises loud as they echoed off the walls of your shared bedroom.
âgonna pump this pussy full of cum, baby.â he rasped into your ear, his breath warm, but your skin still breaking out in goosebumps. your nails dug into his back, your head empty, unable to beg him anymore. but thatâs okay, he was already cumming in you. his twitching cock dumped his huge load into your aching pussy. and it just kept going and going. âso much cum, baby. fuck. fuck.â he whimpered. âsuch a good girl. fuck. daddyâs perfect girl.â
his thrusts finally rolled to a stop, his body collapsing next to yours, his breathing heavy against your neck. he kissed your flushed skin. âare you okay, baby?â he asked quietly, his lips brushing against the skin of your neck with his words.
your answering contented sigh told him everything he needed to know. he giggled. âyou feel good, princess?â his arm was around your middle, holding you closer to him in an awkward post coital embrace. âfeeling a little spacey?â
âmhm.â
he kissed your jaw before pushing himself up on weakened arms and slowly pulling out of you. his cum spilled onto the sheets.
âbaby!â he playfully scolded. âi said to not let any of this spill.â his fingers tickled your sides, causing you to squirm and giggle. your squirming caused more of his cum to leak out of you. âbaby! youâre letting more out!â he teased as he continued his tickle attack. âoh my gosh and here i thought you were my good girl.â
âi am!â you fought back, pushing his tickling hands away. and he let you.
he looked down at you, his eyes sparkling, literal heart eyes as he stared at you. âi love you.â he said.
âi love you.â you answered.
he leaned forward and pecked your lips before retreating to the bathroom for a warm cloth.
áŻáĄŁđ©
i really didnât expect so many people to be so stoked about this post. it made me nervous! lol i hope it lived up to everyoneâs expectations. pls let me know your thoughts.
⥠pls reblog if you liked it! it truly helps a lot and makes me smile :) âĄ
©hyunjins-orange-slice-too i do not give permission for this work or any of my work to be translated, copied, or reposted.
@httpdwaekki @bangchansslut6 <33
#emmy answers#stray kids#bang chan#stray kids x reader#stray kids imagines#bang chan stray kids#bang chan x reader#bang chan imagines#bang chan smut#stray kids bang chan#bang chan x you#stray kids smut
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