#Louder than Life 2021 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

alphabetboyluvr · 1 year ago

Text

throttle │ jjk - one

this fic is my baby and has just hit 400k over on wp, so I'm sharing her here too he he

one / two / three / four / five / six / seven / eight / nine / ten / eleven

warnings - jungkook is blonde <3, he's also a bit of an asshole. dangerous driving, alcohol consumption, nothing major, we're setting scenes, building worlds just to ruin them woohoo. mentions of violence, gang dynamics. both the oc and jk swear like sailors.

word count - 17.8k

minors dni // posted to wp late 2021 // series masterlist

The bell above the gas station door always chimes just a little bit louder than is really necessary.

In fact, the shrill clang of metal is so intrusive, that it feels borderline rude every single time a customer swings the door open. It's only natural for you to ignore it now, affronted by the way it distracts your focus.

It's not like you're ever doing anything important. Just flicking through the day's newspapers or counting stock.

Although, come to think of it, you're never actually counting stock, either. You leave that job for Jieun, because you know she's a stickler for the rules, and likes feeling accomplished after her shifts are finished.

You're not really sure how much accomplishment can be derived from a part-time job at a GS25 attached to a gas station forecourt, but she seems to enjoy it.

This job really isn't for you - but it's better than following your father into local politics, and nepotism is all you really have going for you, considering you flunked the college entrance exam. An act of rebellion, for the corruption scandal your father had chosen to embroil himself in during your senior year, you had refused to write a single word on the paper.

You thought it would embarrass him - and it did. Just at your expense.

And so, while it may not be your childhood dream of being a pop star, or a vet, or anything of any significance, ringing up bills at the gas station is how you're able to pay your own bills. It'll do for now.

You ignore the chime of the bell as the door to the service station opens once more.

It's the start of the year, and the breeze is bitter whenever it rushes in. This time, the wind is accompanied by a guy in his mid-thirties. Dark slacks, burgundy jumper. His off-brand sliders scuff across the floor as he traipses round to the refrigerator, bottle clinking as he picks up a little soju and some beer for his evening. It's not an uncommon occurrence for men his age.

You hypothesise his next move. To the snack section to pick up something for his kids? Maybe straight to the kiosk to pay for his fuel? You check the screen, and notice he's barely added enough gas to cover the minimum charge.

A scornful mutter of 'priorities' laces your lips, as you see him put back the soju and reach for the whisky instead.

Still, you can't blame him. It's fucking freezing. A little whisky to warm him up will probably be as cost-effective as getting a new boiler that actually works.

It's all just an assumption of course.

You don't know this man, and you don't have a clue if his boiler works or not - but thinking about the lives of the people you meet for split fractions of time always helps to make your shift go quicker.

He comes to the counter, pays, and leaves.

You wonder if he's made up a life for you in his head, too.

Probably not. He probably already has an actual life to distract him from his thoughts. Maybe that's what the whisky is for.

And there you go again; hypothesising. Thinking. Putting your assumptions onto strangers.

The next customer is a girl around your age, wearing a fluffy pink coat and hoops big enough to be worn as bangles. She arrives on foot, pushing the swing door open without much care for excessive force.

You decide, all rather quickly, that she must work at the gentlemen's club around the corner from the gas station. She's buying a coffee, iced, and nothing else.

It's when she's at the kiosk that you realise your make-believe life for her is terribly inaccurate. She fumbles with her purse, dropping her staff I.D. card.

She's a nurse. Paediatric nurse, to be specific. The coffee she's picked up isn't for a boost before a shift on the poles, but to keep her going through a night on the wards.

And yet despite how your assumptions are so often so wrong, you still consider yourself to be a good judge of character.

It's a flaw, the way you always seem to think you can read people; think you can look at their demeanour, their clothes, and assume their financial status, what they do after the sun sets, and if they're going home to an empty house or not.

Your thoughts become lore. The gas station you work in is the thick leather cover that protects your make-believe world from outsiders.

When the bell chimes again, you don't look up.

It's a habit. You don't want to make eye contact. It breaks the illusion that these people are just characters in your head.

Instead, you glance up to the curved mirror in the far corner of the shop. It acts as a second pair of eyes, and is ignored by pretty much all of the customers - except for the teenage girls who like to take selfies in it.

Tall, you assess when you finally find the new customer in the mirror. Broad.

His posture a little sloped, but all things considered, he carries himself well. He heads for the refrigerators, just like every man above the age of 19 seems to do on a Friday night. There's that clink again, and you guess he's going for soju. He's young, so it seems apt. Whatever's cheapest seems to be the drink of choice for the guys your age, and you can't blame them.

You watch, cautious to not catch his gaze, as he heads to the food fridge.

Gimbap, you guess. Tuna, not chicken. One roll, not two.

He pulls out his phone to check a notification, and you notice just how hard his gaze is. There's a ridge between his brows, and a couple silver ballbearings accenting the brow farthest from you. Whatever he's reading on his phone, he doesn't like.

Girlfriend, you guess again. No. An ex. No, no. A FWB turned far-too-clingy.

He looks like the type to be after something a little casual.

The tattoos on his hands are nothing special - you've seen hands like his in countless 'sneaky' Instagram stories; a hand on the thigh, holding a bag. Y'know, the ones. The kind of shit girls post with the caption 'private, not secret' - but you both know there's nothing really 'private' about it. The owner of the hands will be blocked within a week or two, once the girl realises he's nothing special, just like his hands.

You hear him mutter beneath his breath. You can't quite make it out, but the way he shakes his head lets you know that it was most likely a curse. He locks his phone, tucks it into the back pocket of his jeans, and carries on looking for something to eat.

You watch as his gaze lifts and falls.

That's it, you urge silently. Go for the gimbap.

You want to be proven right.

He's already got a green bottle tucked into the pocket of his black bomber jacket, so you know you've got his choice of drink correct. You're assuming that your guess about his phone is correct, too, so you only need one more right to get a full house.

As he looks across the snacks - gimbap, vacuum-sealed meats, cheese, strawberry sandwiches and enough microwavable food to feed an orphanage - he pushes his hair out of his face. The way it falls back down almost instantly makes you smile.

He needs a haircut - but you bet that his FWB (turned far-too-clingy lover) loves it, so he keeps it long for her satisfaction. It's bleached; pale as the sticky rice balls he's eyeing up, with dark roots that let you know he's trouble. No boy with hair like that has ever been good news. Especially not the ones who look like him.

Or so you guess look like him. He's wearing a mask. It's black, to match his outfit, cinched at the nose, hooked around ears that are studded up the sides. He must have, what? Five? Six? Little square studs in there. Airport security must be a nightmare.

You smile to yourself as he reaches for gimbap. One roll, not two. Tuna, not chicken. Bingo.

"Pump six," he says as he approaches the counter. You already know. It's been waiting on the screen since he walked in. There's no one else in the forecourt. "And these."

He tosses down the gimbap, and pulls the soju from his pocket, an old receipt coming with it. Kang's Auto Repairs it reads, but he stuffs it back into his pocket before you can read anything else.

"We're cheaper," you note, not really caring for revealing just how incredibly nosey you are. There's a perspex screen between you, which always makes you feel protected - from people, their judgements and whatever other airborne diseases they might be carrying. From the looks of him, the only diseases he'll be carrying are the ones found beneath the sheets. He's too well-built to be suffering from any ailments - but equally, too well built to not to be fucking about. "Cheaper than Kang's, I mean. He'll charge you an arm and a leg for the honour of his service."

"Hmm?" He raises a brow, obviously just wanting to pay for his shit and go. "Thanks, but I like Kang's. Been going there for years."

You hold back a laugh. He's no older than you. 24? 25? Yet he's talking like he's been loyal to that over-priced, under-qualified garage for decades. The neighbourhood is littered with garages, scrap part dealers and gas stations, and yet Kang's is the main competitor for your place. It's not even in this neighbourhood - it's across the river, which is a different district entirely, but the proximity is close enough. Your boss will never miss an opportunity to shit talk Old Man Kang and his 'con-artist' car mechanics. He doesn't think any of them are actually trained.

"Yeah, well," you smile, scanning his items, pretending there's a fault with the barcode on his gimbap just to be a little annoying. "Our guy, Yoongi, he's a specialist with those." You nod out of the window and towards the car by pump six. It's red; a little bit brash, but a classic. "Pony, right? Hyundai? '80?"

"Pony," he nods, tone neutral but eyes a little narrow. Doesn't know why, but he didn't expect you to know - and then he remembers you work at a garage. Of course you know. Got the year wrong, though."It's an '83. A mark two. I'll keep the suggestion in mind," he adds, though you both know he's lying. "How much do I owe you?"

He doesn't really listen as you list off the figure. Just hands you his card, hums when you ask for his signature - sign of a big spender, must be a full tank - and says little else. His phone buzzes on the counter as he stuffs his purchases back into his pockets, and you glance down - again, not caring for the discretion of your nosey tendencies.

KNJ. (1) New Message.

Sneaky bastard, you think. How rude of him not to have his message previews displayed.

You're not sure if he caught you looking, but he snaps his phone up regardless and shoves it into his back pocket.

"Cheers," he nods, before he sets off into the night. Car unlocked, he slides into the driver's seat and empties his pockets onto the passengers' side. You watch on for a moment, before there's a rattle of his exhaust pipe, engine roaring into action - and like that, he's gone. You assume he's not on his way to his FWB (turned far-too-clingy lover). Wouldn't have bought tuna if he was. Then again, he's a guy. You don't expect him to care about such social cues.

Maybe he's just left hers. His neck did seem a little red, but then again, it's cold. Minus 3. The river you walk across to get to work is frozen over, and has been for about two weeks now. You've got a heat pack stuffed in either pocket of your work jacket.

Well, Yoongi's work jacket. It's his name stitched into the breast pocket - but it's bigger than yours, so you can fit a few more layers beneath it. If the boss saw you in it, he'd have a bitch fit for 'not following company protocols,' and for not caring about the 'company brand image'. Which is true. You're neither following protocols, nor do you care about the company nor its brand image.

It's just gone nine on a Friday night, though, and the boss clocked out a few hours ago with a bottle of makgeolli and the day's newspaper under his arm. He's not gonna see. And if he does, what's he gonna do? Fire you? Good luck to him finding anyone else who wants to spend their winter nights freezing half-to-death in this shit hole of a gas station.

By the time midnight hits, you've been yawning for at least an hour. Keeping yourself warm is a laboursome task.

"You're gonna catch a cold," Yoongi acknowledges as he enters the shop through the back entrance. He's still wrapped up in a calf-length puffa jacket, all warm and cosy. He heads out past the kiosks as normal, up to the fridges. Bagged americano and a cup of ice. You know his score - and you're proven right. "Tell me why I agreed to cover your night shift, again?" he says with a slight shiver as he scans through his own items.

Though he's typically out fixing up cars behind the service station, he helps you out at the kiosk too. Normally just when there are staff shortages - which in all fairness, occur more frequently than you'd expect.

"'Cause you love me," you sing, knowing that it's entirely plausible.

Yoongi - stone-cold, stoic, as emotionally inept as you'd expect a bachelor verging on his 30s to be - could very much be in love with you. It's not like he really speaks to many other women, and he's never given you a reason to believe he's not interested.

But he does give you his jacket, cuts you slack on the days you feel like shit, and covers the shifts you don't want to work without asking any questions. Sometimes he sneaks you the food that was meant to be tossed in the bin overnight, and other times he makes sure there's a peach tea waiting for you when you clock in.

"It's 'cause I love money," he corrects, as if the extra 30,000 won he'll make from the last three hours of your shift is really an incentive. He's already spent 3,000 on his coffee. "Now scram. Get yourself home. Fucking freezing tonight. Want me to call you a cab?"

That'll be an extra 7,000 to his evenings' expenses. You really don't think he does love the money. At least not enough for it to be a reasonable excuse.

"It's good," you shake your head. "You know I'm not far away."

He nods, not really fighting your choices. It's not like you ever accept his offer anyway. He learned quite a long time ago that if you want something done, you'll do it for yourself.

Y'see, you're not the only one who watches.

Yoongi watches you too, as you tap through on the screen to log yourself out and cash up the till.

You've only run 260,000 through your till in the last four hours, barely enough to make ends meet for the gas station. No wonder the place hasn't had any upgrades - with the exception of tills and a new fridge every now and again - since the mid-noughties. The signs are rusting, and Yoongi still has to change the fuel prices by hand every morning.

On the rare shifts you work together, you like to make assumptions together. You guess what people are gonna buy, hypothesise where they're going, who they're going with. When you hear bottles clink, you guess which flavour soju they're going for, as if you don't only have 4 flavours stocked. During the summer, you like to guess who's filling up their tanks to go to the coast.

The door chimes as a new customer walks in, and Yoongi knocks his head back. "Go on, out. I'll cash your till up. It's all good."

You ask if he's sure, to which he smiles and tells you to leave again - so you do. Not without thanking him, and fluttering your lashes a little. Maybe it is your fault, just a little, that Yoongi might be a tiny bit in love with you.

"I owe you the world!" You squeal as you skip out the door. He laughs, but says nothing. He just wants you home and safe as quickly as possible.

Yoongi doesn't mind covering your shifts, not this late at night. He knows this area doesn't have the best reputation, and despite your sharp tongue, he knows that you'd stand absolutely no chance if someone decided that it seemed like a good place to commit a felony or two.

It's a debate you've had a few times before. You know he's right, but you fight against him regardless. It always makes him smile, and only adds to your theory that he might be a little bit in love with you.

You forget the quiet thrum in your chest as soon as the cold air hits you. Yoongi traded his jacket with you before you left; him now in his work uniform, and you in his thick puffa which reaches down to your ankles. Hands stuffed into his pockets, your shoulders hunch as you walk, a mask covering your face just to keep the heat in. Your scarf is wrapped around you so tightly that you might just suffocate, but it would be worth it, you think. You hate this time of year. So fucking cold, and for what?

The bridge lights are off by the time you reach it, illuminated only by a couple of cars. They're sat up towards the far end, facing you, and you sigh. Every fucking weekend.

It's not always the same cars, but quite often it is - or some variation of the same group, at least. They sit, waiting for traffic to die down and the lights to cut off, before turning the bridge into their own little speedway.

You should have guessed from the sound of that asshole's exhaust earlier that evening that he'd be one of them.

The fact he goes to Kang's, too.

It's obvious, when you think about it now.

Guys his age never fill up their tanks - but he did. Filled it up just to spit it all out again, painting the road in iridescent speckles of gas.

You can see the Pony. It's the car farthest away from you, next to a black SsangYong.

You can't make out the model of the SsangYong, but it looks fast. It's lowered, windows tinted, exhaust tampered with, just to create an almighty roar - which screams 'I have a tiny cock'.

At least with the Pony, you can tell that the sound being delivered comes from his engine. Credit where it's due, and all that. He could still very much have a tiny cock, but at least he's better at hiding it.

Crossing your arms over your chest, you hug into yourself to preserve heat. The lights of the cars make you a little self-conscious, aware that you're the only thing in sight that's disturbing their peace. There's ice on the road, but you pay it no notice, knowing that there's no point in worrying about one of the cars swerving off-road as they inevitably shoot past you.

If it happens, it happens.

The SsangYong is loud. Obnoxiously, so. You can hear pressure being put down and released on the gas pedal, clutch raised. He's teasing you. Warning you. Hurry up.

Next to it, the Pony hums. He doesn't seem interested in taunting you as if you could fight a two-tonne vehicle as it hurtles towards you. That, or he doesn't want to waste his gas. Lord knows he'll be wasting enough of it tonight as it is.

"Try me, fucker," you mumble under your breath, eyes trained on the black car. You can't make out its driver, nor do you really care.

It's at this point you notice a guy on the opposite side of the road.

He flashes the torch of his phone, once, twice. The Pony kicks into gear now, too, revving to rival the SsangYong. You're halfway across the bridge, wishing they could have just waited, like, one more minute. But whatever. Assholes will be assholes.

The torch guy is out of your line of vision by the time you hear tyres screech against the ice-cold road, rubber-burning regardless. The Ssangyong bolts, fumes from the exhaust fogging in the air behind it. You expect the Pony to do the same.

It takes you half a second to realise it's stagnated, and another half to realise that things aren't going to plan for Mr Gimbap.

There's a thud from the back wheels as they lock and release, causing the wheels to spin out. You've seen enough wheel spins now to know one, and as the Pony lurches forward, you know that's exactly what it is - but you also know the road is icy.

The fun of a wheel spin, or so Yoongi likes to tell you, is that brief moment of lost control. He likes to do it whenever he gives you a lift home, because he finds the way you freak out funny - but he's always in command of his vehicle. He's never done it with you in the car during the winter. He knows better. Doesn't actually want to lose control.

At least, not like the dude in the driver's seat of the Pony currently is.

The back kicks out, sending him swerving. The front wheels are a fucking mess, his hands twisting the wheel in an attempt to rectify his fuck up. It's fruitless. He's off the clutch, the wheels aren't spinning, but he's already on the ice, and he's hurtling towards you.

You're aware you should run, but like the river, you're stuck. Frozen in place.

Maybe you should have accepted Yoongi's offer of a taxi. RIP.

There's another biting screech as you're doused in headlights, and you're pretty sure that this is what people mean when they say you see the light before you die. Fucking blinding. No way those lamps are regulation approved.

It's as you're bracing yourself for the inevitable end (and thinking about how embarrassing it's going to be when your family is tasked with clearing out your apartment after your demise - you haven't cleaned for weeks, laundry has been sat in the washer for two days, and there's a pizza box that you don't dare look in sitting next to the bin) that miracle seems to strike.

The Pony hits an uniced patch just in time for the driver to slam on his breaks. Handbrake, by the sound of it, but you're not sure. Not really sure of anything. Your heart is beating in your throat.

Steam is coming from the heat of the tyres, but the air around you is frozen, and so are you. You're not sure if it's from the cold or from the shock. A bit of both probably. You don't shake out of it until the driver's door pops open.

"The fuck are you doing?" He shouts. His mask is off now, not like it had been in the store. Light glimmers off yet more metal stuck in face, this time a ring around his plump bottom lip. His nose, though well proportioned, is blushed. "I could have fucking hit you!"

"Uh, yeah?" You almost laugh, too stunned to compute the fact that he was shouting at you. "Yeah, you could have fucking hit me, you asshole-"

"The fuck are you doing on the bridge? This late? Wearing all fucking black? I know you work around here, so I know you know what this place is used for-"

"Yeah, it's a bridge," you deadpan. It's notorious for racing, but who cares? It's not like you're in the wrong here. He's the one breaking laws. You're just trying to go home. "It's used to cross rivers. So, yanno, people working night shifts can walk home without rowing a fucking boat. Pretty neat actually, invented by the Greeks."

"Don't be smart," he scolds. "You saw us gearing up, you knew what was about to ha-"

"I'm sorry," you really are laughing now. "Are you telling me that I'm in the wrong? You? The asshole who's racing his shitty car on an icy fucking bridge? The asshole who can't control his aforementioned shitty car-"

"Can control it," he snaps. "If I couldn't, you'd be fucking dead."

"Oh, well thank you very much! How kind of you to not kill me as a result of your reckless driving. No, really. I appreciate it so much. How ever can I repay you?"

"You know what?" He calls after you when you begin to walk away. As far as you're concerned, the conversion is done. "Next time, I will just hit you."

"Be my fucking guest!" You shout back, holding your middle finger up to wave goodbye. "Stick to Kang's next time, you pretentious, self-absorbed cunt."

"Gladly."

"Oh, and by the way," you begin to say in a sickly sweet tone, which you just know is going to piss him off. You turn to find him standing, facing the bridge wall, looking at the river that's illuminated only by the headlamps of his car, like two little moons. The real one is hidden by clouds. "You'll have better control if you release the clutch a little slower. Wheelspin like that? Yeah, someone needs to practise their clutch control."

He looks like he wants to say something, but instead, he just flares his nostrils and grates his jaw. He knows you're right. Knows he missed the mark - but he'd been distracted when he noticed you on the bridge. You threw him off his game.

Equally, you know he's a good driver. The way he gained control of his car on the ice was borderline expert. Impressive. You won't go as far to say life-saving, because if it wasn't for his driving in the first place, your life wouldn't have needed any God Damn saving.

You walk backwards for a step or two, just to gloat in the knowledge you've gotten the last word. He glares at you, but stays silent. Victory.

"Oi, Kook. The fuck was that about?" A distant voice yells. The SsangYong driver, you assume.

"Nothin'," he yells back. His eyes are still on you, watching as you hunch a little, folding your arms over your chest. You must be freezing, he thinks. Stupid, too. The area is littered with taxis on Friday nights. Why anyone would choose to walk is beyond him. He casts you one final stare, his chest heaving from the adrenaline, before he turns away from you. "Stupid bitch almost got herself killed. Starting line. Let's go again."

────────────

You don't mention your near-death experience to Yoongi when you see him at work the following Monday. You know he'll just worry, and then he'll really start insisting on ordering cabs for you.

Worse yet, you think he might just order them to arrive when your shift finishes, and then you'll have to take them. No point in making mountains out of molehills.

Customers are always steady on Mondays; people fuelling up for the working week, replenishing stocks wasted on the weekends.

By the time it hits four, school kids are piling in. They're picking up snacks, something to fuel them between mandatory classes and the additional ones they've picked up at hagwons. Poor suckers, you always think.

It's been years since you did the same grind, and you still don't fully understand just why you worked yourself to the bone, only to end up working in a fucking service station.

It had never been the dream. Still isn't - but it beats being hired on account of nepotism, thanks to a father with an unlawful influence in the city.

Your family name - which you don't go by, these days - is on the side of buildings, in the list of hospital beneficiaries, even on the local soccer team's fucking shirts. You're cursed with it; no identity of your own. Even when did try to get a job without the backing of your family, people still knew. Your face has been at God knows how many press junkets, playing the role of the Mayor's darling daughter.

All bullshit, of course.

Your father is just as good at saving face as he is at making investments. Turns out there really is nothing money can't buy; support for a mayoral campaign, the silence of a nanny - of whom he started fucking when you were still in middle school - and enough pearls to keep your mother happy after she found out.

Cars, houses, material goods? You'd wanted for nothing as a kid.

Privilege. It's a funny little thing. You had the world, and yet none of it was yours. Not really. And so, as soon as you were of legal age, you were out of the family home, trying to find some concrete meaning for your life.

All you'd found so far was the harrowing knowledge that your father's mayoral tenure had been hell for those without the privileges you'd been raised with, and therefore you'd distanced yourself so far from your family that you weren't even sure they'd recognise you, anymore.

"You good?" Yoongi asks, around about the time the clock hits five. He's by the back entrance, wiping his oil-covered hands on an old rag. "Just finishing up."

"Good," you nod in response to his question. You give him a fond smile to let him know that the perplexed expression he'd caught on your face was nothing to be worried about, and then you ask him his plans for the evening.

There are only a few more hours left on the clock for you. It's a mid-shift, someone else coming in to work the night rotation. You've never liked these shifts - the highest influx of customers, but by far the least interesting interactions.

They come and go so quickly that it's hard to make up a fake life for them, before they're replaced by the next sullen face, wanting to get in and out as quickly as possible.

"Gimmie a call if you need a lift," Yoongi calls over as he gets his jacket to leave. Off comes his work one, tossed over to you, replaced with the black puffa you returned that morning.

"Will do," you nod - and you both know you're lying. Still, he's a gentleman through and through. Wouldn't have felt right if he didn't at least offer. The bell on the entryway door chimes, but you don't look over to see the customer, choosing to smile at your friend instead. "Catch ya later, Yoongs."

"Yeah, you too," he smiles back, zipping up his coat and pulling up his mask. He's walking home, too, but it's still light. It will be dark by the time nine hits, and even though he doesn't know about last Friday night, he still doesn't like the idea of you walking home alone.

You hear the clink of glasses by the fridge, but the view is obscured by an obnoxious advertising standee your boss has insisted you put up inside the store. You tried telling him that the whole point was to draw customers in, not block them from even entering, but he was having none of it. Doesn't trust the kids in the neighbourhood not to nick it.

There's a crunch as the lid of the chest freezer is slid open, a cup of ice rattling as it's pulled from the stack. You only filled it up half an hour ago.

Annoying. And who the fuck is drinking an iced drink on a day like today? You think, as if Yoongi doesn't reach for an iced americano before each and every shift. You're just as bad. Your peach tea habit is becoming an issue.

You glance to the forecourt to check which pump to ring through - and that's when you see it.

Sat in bay six, as proud as the paint is bright, is that stupid fucking Pony again. With a small scoff, you pull up the balance - just over 30,000. Half a tank. Already.

Hardly a surprise, with the way he had been ragging it about on Friday evening. Must be a common occurrence.

As he comes into your line of vision, you busy yourself.

Turning your back to the kiosk, you're arranging cigarettes that don't need to be arranged, purely so that you don't have to look at him. The bottom of his soju bottle clinks against the counter, the ice and a coffee bag following suit. You still don't turn around, instead opting to look through the 'how-to' manual for the lottery machine, just to really reinforce the fact that serving him is the last thing you want to do.

Had you not told him to stick to Kang's?

"Ahem," he coughs.

You pause mid-page turn and look vacantly into the distance for a moment, before facing him with a smile so insincere it's almost comical.

"Sorry, didn't see you there."

He nods, but doesn't say anything further. He's in all black again, this time with a sweater beneath his bomber. Air quality is still bad, thanks to the cold temperatures and lack of rain to clear the skies, so he's wearing a mask again, but it's perched beneath his jaw. His poker face holds up well.

You ring up his total, ignoring the fact he's chosen to go for a peach tea, not coffee like you'd assumed, and ask if he wants a receipt. He declines, and heads on his way, scooping up his soju bottle, leaving the peach tea.

"Oi," you call after him, but he ignores you."Oi."

Still, nothing. He pushes the door open with his knuckles that are wrapped tightly around the neck of his bottle, not paying you any attention. He's just being a dick at this point. You know he can hear you.

"Oi," you shout again, sliding out from behind the kiosk and following him to the door. You don't grab his drink - he can go back and pick it up himself, the asshole.

"Kook," you shout, remembering the name the SsangYong driver had called him by.

He stops now.

"Oh," he turns, lips pursed, before throwing your words right back at you. "Sorry, didn't see you there."

Neither of you say anything. It's fucking freezing, and you can see your breath as you huddle yourself together. His eyes are soft, expression gentle, to suggest he's only teasing, but you can't work him out.

"You left your drink."

He shakes his head. Holds up his soju. "No, I didn't. That's yours. You like them, right? It's what you were drinking the other day?"

You narrow your eyes, only for him to raise his brows. You aren't the only nosey one, doll.

"Bit weird," you tell him.

Retrospectively, he thinks you're probably right. It had seemed like a good idea at the time. He hadn't intended for it to be so strange - he just isn't great at admitting when he's in the wrong, so a peace offering is a far more tempting solution.

He digs a hand into his pocket, almost as if he's searching for the remains of his dignity, but simply shrugs. "I know I was a bit of a prick."

Acknowledgements of flaws are always welcome by you, but you really don't fancy just forgiving and forgetting. As stupid as it all seems, it was a life or death situation. A peach fucking tea wouldn't have resurrected you or uncrushed your bones.

"Yeah," you nod, biting down on your lip, a little unsure of how to handle the situation. "You were. And not just 'a bit' of a prick. Massive prick, actually."

He repeats your correction, and adds, "You just took me by surprise. I panicked. I'm not usually that..."

"Unreasonable? Arsey? Unable to control your clutch?"

"All of the above," he smiles, and you notice that he has dimples. Asshole. "Look, I won't bother you again. It just wasn't sitting right with me, the way I behaved. My mother would have been rolling in her grave if she heard me speak to a girl like that, especially so late at night. It was a dick move... and so," he inhales, looking at the ground before briefly meeting your eyes again. They're round and wide, almost as if he's incapable of telling lies. "I'm sorry."

There's silence for a moment, and then there's the flash of headlights as a second car rolls into the forecourt. You both turn to check the car, but it's just a standard family saloon. Nothing worth checking out, but it's enough to end the conversation.

"Stick to Kang's," you simply say as he pops open the door to his car. "I appreciate the sentiment, though. Was sweet."

He nods, fully intending on sticking to Kang's. He just needed to do this before he could move on from things.

Or at least, that's the assumption that you make as he drives away.

You wait for a little while, ignoring the man clicking the gas nozzle into the side of his car, just watching the now empty road where the small red car had sped off from. You wonder where he's going, but determine he's most likely going to that FWB you've decided he has.

Turning on your heels slowly, you let your body weight fall into the swing door, pushing it open with your shoulder. The bell jingles, like always, and for some reason, it kind of feels like the sound has settled in your stomach. It's all jittery and annoying, and you don't quite understand it. You definitely don't like it, whatever this feeling is.

It's the same feeling that washes over you next Thursday afternoon, when the bell chimes and you glance out the window, only to see a red Hyundai fucking Pony sat in bay six.

He begins to make a habit of it. Neither of you really address it. He just keeps showing up, filling his tank up, and buying whatever tickles his fancy from the snack fridge. It's nearly always gimbap. Occasionally he'll pick up something a little more substantial, and it's always accompanied with soju on Friday nights.

It takes about three weeks for you to be able to distinguish the way in which he opens the shop door. The bell chimes a little slower than normal, his casually cool demeanour preventing him from using too much force to open it. It will always 'ding' for just a bit longer than when other people push open the door. Doesn't matter where you are in the shop, what time it is. You always know when it's him.

It's a Saturday when you hear the unmistakable sound of him again, 4 weeks since that first time.

You can't see him, thanks to the standee that is still obstructing your view, but you can hear the fridges. One, two, bottles of soju. There's another clang. Three? Unusual. It's when he heads to the snack fridge that you realise you're off your game.

He's holding beers - four of them. Making the most of the four for 10,000 deal, you muse. The bottles are green, so you assume Terra, but there are some foreign imports in the fridge, too. You kind of stop guessing at this point, too busy watching. His hair is messy, like aways, and the flannel shirt he's wearing is in need of an iron, but you have to admit - there's a certain charm about him.

Your eyes flick to the door to check that nobody else has entered, and are proven correct - so why does your stomach still feel like that bloody bell chiming?

"Am I good to leave these here?" He asks, drawing your attention back to him. He's already putting the beers down on the counter, so it's not really like you can say no. "Haven't filled up yet, just wanted to check that you had what I was after, first."

"Beers?" You laugh almost immediately. "It's a GS25, dude. Course we have beers."

"Right," he nods, scrunching his nose up a little as he smiles. It was a stupid excuse, and he knew it. Part of you thinks he actually looks a little bashful. It's sweet. Confusing - but sweet, nonetheless. "I'll just go fill up."

"Uh-huh," you nod, when he doesn't leave immediately, almost as if he's waiting for permission. He laughs, and so do you. It's awkward, and you don't know why but you find yourself dropping his gaze. "Just go fill up your car."

"Yeah, yeah," he says. "Fill up. Right."

You move his bottles to the side just in case of another customer, and set about making yourself look busy, but you're a simple being. It's hard to do anything other than wistfully stare when a boy that pretty is stood in your forecourt.

He pays you no notice as he unscrews his gas cap and positions the nozzle against the opening of his car.

There's a casual nature to his posture, leaning back ever so slightly as he slides the length of the nozzle into his car, displaying just how in tune he is with doing such a menial task. It's second nature at this point.

He watches the nozzle, then lifts his gaze above the car and out towards the road. His eyes are hard, focused almost, that little line forming between his brows again. Almost like he's looking for something.

There's a click as his gas reaches its limit, and he withdraws the nozzle slightly, letting the excess drip into the tank. He knocks it once, twice, against the entrance to be sure that he's emptied it of every last drop, before he slides it out and hooks it back into its holder.

You finally avert your eyes as he screws the cap back into place, your fingers working nimbly to bring up his total on the screen.

There's that ringing feeling again when you notice he's barely reached the minimum spend, yet you could hear the tell-tale sign of a full tank from the forecourt. He hadn't needed gas at all.

He could have just gotten a few bottles of beer from any of the convenience stores in the area - and yet for some reason, he made his excuse to come to you.

The silage of his aftershave lingers by the kiosk, and you remind yourself that he's probably off to see a girl you've made up in your head. The beers are probably to be drunk with her. The flannel shirt is still creased because what's the point in ironing something that will just end up on the floor, anyway?

It's these thoughts that have you acting a little frosty again when he returns. You ring up his total, instruct him to put his card in the machine, as if he doesn't know what he's doing, and then you offer him a receipt.

He's a little confused by the fact you're as cold as the air outside.

Had your interactions not developed past the point of a typical cashier-customer relationship? Maybe he'd read the situation a little wrong.

"Kang's have beer," he finally adds, accepting his receipt, studying it, just to see if it has your name listed under the cashier ID. It does. He takes his time to fold it up, instead of just stuffing it into his back pocket. He's biding time. Making more for himself. "But I'm a bit of a liar," he says, ending his statement with your name. The way he says it, hanging onto the last syllable, taking claim of your identity as his gaze meets your eyes, has that stupid ringing feeling back in your stomach. "I'm not here for beers."

"No?" you ask, almost nonchalant. You're divided by a perspex screen, and you've never been more thankful. It's cutting the tension for you.

"No," he shakes his head. He's about to speak, when the bell of the door goes again - for real, this time. Not just in your stomach.

He steps aside to let the customer pay for their gas. It's a simple transaction, no added extras like Flannel Boy always has.

He stands awkwardly, toying at the bagged sweets with his ring adorned fingers. You decide that even if your assumptions about him are wrong, there's one that must be right: he knows he's hot.

The way he turns and smirks after the customer leaves, and says, "where were we?", only confirms this.

"You were saying how you weren't here for beer," you remind him, not that he actually needs it.

The perspex screen feels like a thick brick wall. You're simultaneously thankful for and annoyed by it.

"Ah, that's right," he nods. "You were saying how you're going to call in sick tomorrow night and meet me downtown."

"I'm gonna do what now?" You laugh, caught off guard by his boldness. He's smooth, you'll give him that much.

"You're gonna meet me downtown," he says simply, before adding, "Jungangno underground, exit two. The one near CGV. I can draw you a map-"

"Shut up," you laugh, blissfully ignoring the fact he's flirting with you. "I know Jungangno."

"So you'll meet me there?"

"I didn't say that."

He begins to gather up his beers, two in either hand, a smile etched on his cheeks. "So I'll see you tomorrow, at, hmm, say, 8?"

"No," you laugh.

"Yes," he grins back, walking away so that you don't have even more opportunities to reject his advances.

"No, you won't."

You sound so full of conviction when you say it. Determined. Self-assured.

Idiot.

────────────

You tell yourself that you're not going to go.

You told Mr Gimbap that, too, before he left the gas station, not that he was listening.

You tell yourself it again when you're thinking about what you could wear, and then you repeat it like an oath when you're texting Yoongi to see if he can cover your shift.

It's not like you're actually going to go.

You just want to check out your options.

And yet, somehow, you find yourself sitting on a bench outside a shitty burger chain at seven-fifty-six the next evening.

You're dressed casually, in a pair of jeans and a slouchy sweater which is a few sizes too big, but you think it looks cute. It's covered by a thick puffa jacket, regardless - cropped to your hips, unlike Yoongi's mammoth calf-length one.

He told you he'd be happy to cover your shift tonight when you asked, but you still feel a little guilty.

Mainly because when he asked why, you panicked and lied, telling him it was a friend's birthday.

You then also told yourself that you're definitely going to hell - but it's not like that's news to you.

It's still freezing, and you're thankful that you changed out of your converse and into a pair of boots before you left your apartment. Your hair is clipped up, make up the same as it normally is, just with a little more mascara than normal. You don't want to make it look like you've actually made an effort - but you definitely have.

You're about a mile and a half from work, but you can feel that bloody door chime in your stomach, again.

Should you walk away, a little? You don't want him to see you waiting.

Appearing too keen is the least of your desires.

Desperation isn't a good look for anyone. If anything, he should be the one waiting for you. Kind of rude that he isn't, actually. So you get up, and pace around a little, before thinking fuck it.

You hop on the elevator and head down into Jungangno underground mall, painfully aware of your stomach doing that stupid ringing thing again. Maybe it's vertigo. From, like, the change in altitude, or some shit like that. You're almost able to convince yourself that it's plausible. Almost.

The shops in the underground mall are a welcome distraction. Ajummas stand in dated clothing stores, offering low-quality clothes for even lower prices. It's crowded, and stuffy, but you're enjoying the distraction. You head for your favourite jewellery place, an emporium filled floor to ceiling with what must be thousands of jewellery pieces, and fumble through the racks of earrings.

You aren't wearing any, and remember that he - Kook, though you're not entirely sure that's actually his name - wore enough to open up his own jewellery store. You settle on a simple pair, just a couple silver hoops. It's a subtle difference, but one that makes you feel a little more confident. A little more willing to awkwardly say hello, and go on a date (if you can call it that) with a guy you barely know.

Pulling your phone out, you check the time. Seven past eight. Do-able. A little late, but not so late that it's rude. You head up the stairs, and are greeted with almost the exact same scene you had left ten minutes earlier.

Perhaps he's just running late. It's not embarrassing to be the first one waiting, not now that it's gone past the meeting time, but you can feel that ringing in your stomach begin to grate against your insides.

It hits eight-fifteen, and you're feeling anxious. Embarrassed. Even if he does show up now, it's obvious that you've been waiting there like a tragic, desperate excuse of a woman.

Five more minutes, you tell yourself.

But five turns into ten, and then another fifteen, and then it's nearly nine.

You pull out your phone and are barely able to type, thanks to how bloody cold it is.

How long until lateness turns into being stood up?

Opinions vary, but everyone on the little online forum you're reading seems to be of agreement that 45 minutes is the cut off point. 45 cold, lonely, mortifying minutes.

You imagine he's watching you, laughing from the warmth of a cafe, with that friends-with-benefits girl you've convinced yourself is definitely real.

God, you must look like a twat. You've been sat here for so fucking long. Your hands are numb, arse too, and you know you're gonna wake up with a cold - but none of these compare to your hurt pride. Not by a country mile.

With a sigh, you stand, admitting defeat. Being a jerk, you could get over. But this? Deliberately being cruel? You're proven right, after all. The guy is an asshole.

You hop on the 503 out of the downtown area and back towards home. The ride is lonely, city lights reflecting in your eyes as you gaze out the window and wonder at which point your life became this bleak. You work at a gas station, and got stood up by a guy who drives a fucking Pony. Mortifying.

The ding of the bus as it rolls into its stops reminds you of the chime of the gas station door - so you stay on for a few extra stops past your apartment building.

You're gentle as you press the red button to let the driver know you'd like to get off, but there's a little more traffic than normal, so he lets you off ahead of schedule. Odd. The roads are never normally blocked, not at this time of night.

You're only a couple hundred steps away from the bridge, but you notice the red and blue flashing lights across it almost instantly.

Your heart sinks to your stomach, right into the pit where the chime has been grating your insides apart. Still, you keep on walking. It's only the road that's blocked. Not the path. One foot in front of the next, you keep going, until your pace begins to increase. You can see the police cars now, and where they're parked.

Fuck the kid you barely know, fuck feeling sorry for yourself.

All you can think about is Yoongi.

There are four cars sitting outside your place of work, and you can hear an ambulance blast its sirens away from the gas station in an attempt to get through the crowd.

You're gonna be sick. You can feel it - or is that just the chime resting too far up in your oesophagus, now? You ignore it though, and begin to run, faster, faster, faster, boots clicking against the pavement as you draw closer to the gas station. Your boss is there, locked in conversation with a police officer, but Yoongi is nowhere to be seen.

A cop notices you approach, grabbing onto you as you attempt to run past the tape and into the store.

"Woah, woah, woah. Calm down, little lady-"

"Where is he?" You panic, not even caring to offended by the officers choice in tone. "Min Yoongi. The guy who was working. Yoongi, where is he?"

"Who are you?" The officer counters, and you want to scream.

"Where is he?!" You struggle against his grip, kicking out, but the officer is firm. He's trained to handle situations like this; girls like you. The little but fierce. The kind of girls Shakespeare wrote about. "Where the fuck is he?"

From across the forecourt, your boss calls over. "She's one of mine. Was meant to be working this shift. Did a last minute switch with Min Yoongi."

The officer nods, understanding the situation, but not easing his grip. "In that case, I'm gonna need you to come with me to the station. Need you to answer some questions."

You stop struggling. "I- What?"

"You're not under arrest. It's voluntary, but we'll have to go to the station," he speaks calmly, straight to the point. You notice that his nose is slightly crooked. You wonder how many people have punched it. Quite a few, probably, considering that you'd quite like to do the same.

"Just go," your boss calls over, not even looking in your direction. Asshole, you seethe internally. City is full of fucking assholes.

"Where the fuck is Yoongi?!" You demand to know, this time shouting towards your boss, who looks like he's in desperate need of a cigarette. He just fucking shrugs.

"C'mon, station," the officer says, deciding that enough is enough.

You don't know your rights. You can't fight back, not really, and you're starting to tear up, and everything feels like such a fucking mess. You just wanna know that Yoongi is safe, that he's well, that he's okay. If he's not, it's all your fault, and you don't even know how to process that.

In fact, you don't know how to process any of this. Your cheeks are wet before you're even sitting in the back of the police car. The engine rumbles, and before you know it, you're back downtown, but this time you're at the city's main police office.

It's hard to comprehend anything. You practically feel like you're dragged from the car and then dumped in the witness interrogation room. Some rookie cop is asking you questions, and you find yourself not wanting to answer a single one of them.

They're stupid fucking questions, for starters. Dumb shit.

Why did you switch your shift? Were you aware of a planned hold up at your place of work? Is that why you swapped? Who were you going on a date with? Why did you lie to Min Yoongi about your activities this evening? How do you not know the name of your date? Says on your file that you legally changed your name six years ago? Why? Anyone know of your family ties to politics?

Dumb questions reap dumb answers though, so once they realise they're getting nothing of any substance from you, they admit defeat. Tell you they'll be in touch if they need to follow up.

And then, after they've watched you cry for an hour and half over Yoongi, they tell you he's fine. Came in for routine questioning, but was released without charge (obviously) and drove back.

He's waiting for you in the lobby.

That temptation to break the officer's nose? Yeah. Intensifies.

"God, you fucking idiot," Yoongi speaks softly as you come into view, face all red and puffy from tears cried over him. He pulls you into his chest, and you can hear his heart thud, thud, thud, against your head. "Why did you go to work? Shouldda just gone home."

He calls you an idiot again, and you sniffle into his chest. There's a comforting scent to his clothes, a mix of gasoline and cotton, and it makes you feel a little calmer.

You pull away, and inspect his face. There's a small graze on his cheekbone, which is beginning to bruise, and a little dried blood crusting around his nostrils. Other than that, he seems okay.

He's silent as your fingers trace the pink flesh of his cheeks, lips resting a little ajar, unsure. Uncertain. He doesn't know what to make of such an outward display of concern - so he simply brushes it off.

"I'm fine, trouble," he promises, bringing his hands up to clasp your wrists and stop your hands from roaming. Doesn't wanna stop you. Not really. Just knows that he should. "C'mon, let's get you home."

And it's ridiculous, 'cause Yoongi was the one who had been held at knifepoint by three men that evening, the tills forcefully emptied and his life threatened if he didn't tell them where 'the girl' was.

He doesn't tell you that last part when he tells you what happened, though. Doesn't want to scare you. He's scared enough, himself.

It replays in his head, the way the guy with the knife doubled-down when Yoongi said he had no clue where you were. The clatter of the knife against the counter, the hands that tangled in his hair and slammed his face against the surface... yeah, they weren't memories he'd be forgetting any time soon.

Yoongi has few regrets in life, but taking the perspex screen down at the beginning of his shift to clean it definitely makes the list.

A conversation plays on loop, though, which scares him more than anything else.

"You said she'd be here. She ain't fuckin' here!" "Well she normally is. You know I've been keeping watch for weeks-" "Not hard enough." "Oh fuck you, you do it next time, prick."

Doesn't take a genius to work it out - and Yoongi's pretty smart, regardless. For whatever reason, they'd been hoping you'd be on shift.

"Do me a favour?" Yoongi asks as he rolls his car into your neighbourhood. He only lives around the corner from you, but it's too far, he thinks.

"Mhmm?"

"Kind of feel a bit..." he pauses, but doesn't elaborate. He doesn't need to. You already know. "Don't really wanna be alone."

"Stay at mine," you offer, straight off the bat, not giving it a second thought.

He shakes his head. Makes some excuse about your place being small. Avoids mentioning the fact he's scared that someones keeping tabs on you.

"I've got a spare room," he adds. "Makes more sense."

You'd be forgiven for thinking this is just another sign that the poor boy is helplessly infatuated with you. He knows he isn't really all that inconspicuous, but he also knows that the pair of you would never work. He just can't seem to help himself.

And so you end up in his bed, while he takes the pull out sofa in his spare room, because he's far too much of a gent to make you sleep on something so crappy. He leaves the heater on in your room, because you're always complaining about the cold, and tells you not to worry when you pout and mention the fact it will hike his heating bill. It's a small price to pay.

"All the money I've saved when you refuse taxis can go on the heater, instead."

Still, you click it off as soon as you're confident Yoongi won't be back in to check on you.

In the morning, when his hair is all fluffy and cheeks puffy from a crappy sleep, he orders breakfast and double-checks that you're okay to work the shift you're scheduled on for. You remind him that he was the one held at knifepoint. Not you.

You're not surprised to learn that Yoongi thinks two iced americanos and half a bagel each qualifies as 'breakfast', but you appreciate it nonetheless.

"I can cover, if needs be," he rambles, bagel in one hand, americano in the other, while you watch on with a smile. His cheek has bruised rather spectacularly, and you wonder if it aches as much as your heart does. "Boss gave me a couple days off, but I don't love the idea of you being there alone-"

The guilt of asking him to cover the night before is eating you alive. You don't think you'll ever ask him to cover for you again. Karma will catch up with you, you're sure, but for now, you'll be your own Saturn.

"I'll be fine," you smile. "Lightning never strikes twice."

────────────

When Jungkook drives, he drives alone.

No music, no radio, just him and the open road. He likes to hear the way the tarmac sounds beneath his tyres, and how the engine purrs a little louder when he steps on the gas. It's therapy in a way - though, with the amount that he spends on gas, he's pretty certain that an actual therapist would probably be cheaper.

The roads are empty, morning sun breaking beyond the mountains that line Daegu, as he makes his way past the bridge over the river, and out towards Kang's. There's a boxing studio next door, owned by Old Man Kang himself, a little decrepit and definitely not the kind of place you end up by chance.

It's the kind of place that's bestowed upon those who need it; the people looking for a home. A family. A cult, some like to joke, though Jungkook thinks they're half right. For him, it's somewhere to hide when the world gets too invasive; a shadow in the spotlight.

Old Man Kang's boxing club is a shit hole, when Jungkook looks at it objectively. Wires hang from the ceiling, and the walls have needed a paint ever since he'd first stepped foot into the place six years ago. He thinks about doing it sometimes, just showing up early before anyone else arrives, with a can of white emulsion from Daiso and a few brushes. Never does it, though. Would be a thankless job. Old Man Kang probably wouldn't even notice.

And if he did? He'd probably make Jungkook pay for 'defacing his property.'

As he pulls his car into the forecourt, parking up by the air compressors, Jungkook sighs. He isn't expecting anyone else to be here so early, but he's having trouble sleeping. Pulling down on his sun visor, he's rough as he slides the mirror cover across to study his face.

He's not looking too bad - lip a little split, but alright, all things considered. Could have been a lot worse. Namjoon has a mean left hook, after all.

His thumb presses down on the buckle of his seatbelt, releasing it as he reaches over for his duffle bag in the footwell of his passenger seat. There's a clink as he does so, half a dozen bottles of soju ready to be transferred into the fridge by the entrance to the locker room. It's a free for all, used by all the members of the boxing club, but no one ever knows who actually stocks it up. It just kind of... replenishes. Like Christmas presents, or coins under pillows in place of lost teeth.

Admittedly, Jungkook never used to know, either. He still doesn't know who stocks up the waters. He knows who stocks the soju, though. Or at least, he's known for the last few weeks, now.

Where else is he gonna put all the bottles he buys from your store? It's not like he ever drinks them. He just needs an excuse to visit so frequently.

"You're early," a voice says from the back entrance, as Jungkook is shuffling around with the bottles. The fridge light hums, illuminating his face, as he lets his perfectionism take priority when arranging the bottles. He doesn't turn to look, knowing the tone by heart.

"So are you, Minnie."

Minnie by name, mini by nature, Park Jimin is a 5'7 (though he swears blind he's 5'9 with shoes on) force to be reckoned with. He likes to get to the club early, before his shifts at the fishmongers. It gets his blood pumping, ready for a day of hacking away at marine carcases.

"I'm always early," he teases, as he tosses his bag on an old wicker chair in the corner of the room.

It's a large space - a disused rice store that was repurposed in the 80's, and taken over by Old Man Kang after the last owner gambled it away during a back alley game of poker. A large square ring is in the middle, red ropes a little tatty, but still usable. There are a few machines dotted around the corners of the room, but most people opt to use the plethora of punching bags hung up by the far wall.

Jungkook smiles softly as he begins to wrap his hands up. He's dressed down in just a black t-shirt and a pair of grey sweats. They're tapered towards his ankles, where they meet his beat-up black high tops. His laces are pulled tight, wrapped around the classic star logo, and tied in hasty bows on the back of his ankles. Double knotted, as always. "Couldn't sleep."

For how much of a liar he is, Jungkook is always honest with Jimin.

Well. Nearly always.

Jimin heads for the far corner, where a skipping rope is strung up on a rusty nail embedded into the wall. He nods, figuring as much. "Joon isn't happy."

Jungkook rolls his eyes as he stretches out his back. He couldn't give a fuck if Namjoon is happy or not, especially not after-

"You should talk to him."

Squaring up to the coffee-brown punching bag, Jungkook knocks his head to the side. His jaw clenches as he gently presses against the leather to get a feel for the weight. He bounces, left, right, and then throws a punch. The smack of his hand against the weighted bag echoes into the room.

"Or not," Jimin adds, sensing that Jungkook is in no mood to talk to anyone - and definitely not Namjoon.

Unsolicited advice is never received well by Jungkook. If he wants it, he'll ask for it. Jimin knows this.

There's an art to the way his body moves, recoiling a little with every punch thrown until he disciplines himself. Back broad and triangular, calves strong and tense, it's clear to see that Jungkook can defend his own. If he had wanted to fight back against Namjoon, he could have.

But Jungkook is a man of honour. Integrity. Respect. He'd never fight against Namjoon, no matter how much he disagreed with him - so instead, he takes it out on a punching bag that is so old it may as well be an antique. The echo of his assault against the leather rings in his ears like a warning bell. A siren. A chime.

It's funny, 'cause a few roads over - just past the bridge and down the lane - there's a ringing in your ears too.

For you, it actually is a chime - the one of the gas station door, and it's a scathing reminder of how badly you fucked up by asking Yoongi to cover your shift.

You spend your morning lamenting, hypothesising. You're so busy thinking about the stupid boy who drives that god-awful red car, that you don't even bother making assumptions about other customers.

They're all about him. Where he was, who he was with. Why he did what he did.

You decide that he grew up in a single-parent household. He's already mentioned his late mother, and suggested that she influenced his need to apologise, so a father figure didn't really seem to fit the profile you have of him.

He wears so much black because he's scared of having an actual personality. Scared that it makes him vulnerable. Or so you assume. In fact, you decide that 'scared' is the best way to describe him.

A scaredy-cat. A chicken. A pussy. No balls.

After all, he was too scared to show up, and didn't even have the bottle to find a way to let you know. Did he have your number? No - but perhaps that was deliberate on his part, too.

Your final assessment of his character comes in the form of his FWB (turned far-too-clingy lover). If she's real, which again, you've decided she is, then you don't think it's her fault that she's developed an unhealthy dependency on him. He seems to be the type to lift others up, only to drag them back down with him.

Enough thoughts about him, though.

If you're not worthy of his time, then why should he be worthy of yours?

The next few days are spent in a subliminal haze; body moving, mind still. It's Wednesday before you know it.

Jieun is on shift with you, after she complained about not wanting to work alone following the raid. You told her that no one would be stupid enough to rush the place again so soon after the first time, but she's having none of it.

"We don't get paid enough to put our lives at risk," she states whenever the topic of conversation is mentioned. And she's right - you don't.

But as you look at the grainy CCTV footage still-image that's taped up above the counter, you can't help but think they wouldn't have actually killed either you or Jieun. Realistically, they barely left a scratch on Yoongi. Physically, at least. Mentally, he's a little more wounded.

There had been three of them; two rather tall, the third shorter. About Yoongi's height, you guess. Dressed in all black, it's hard to really distinguish any features or their bodies, let alone their faces, which had been covered in ski masks. Run of the mill robbers. The kind you see in crappy action films. Background characters. Just a way to move the plot along, no real personalities, no actual significance to the lives of the protagonists, other than causing a mild inconvenience.

You don't even realise when you're making assumptions, these days. You think in hypothesis more often than not.

The thieves had run off on foot and down the back alley behind the shop, which is where the trail to find them ends. The CCTV for the alley has been out for months. The boss didn't deem it a necessary investment - "Well, we'd never been robbed before!" - so it had fallen to the bottom of his priority list. The issue with the back alley is that it leads to an underpass with so many blind spots that it's easy - almost too easy - to slip into nothingness.

It's when you're staring at them, thinking about the assumptions you could make for your mystery men of misdemeanours, that the door chimes.

You don't ignore it, anymore. The raid has spooked you. So you look towards it, and are met with the sight a broad back. The shoulders, strong and well-defined, are covered in a brown flannel shirt. It's tucked into a pair of jeans, that cling to the contours of the customer's legs. He's not wearing a coat - just hopped out of his car, where the aircon is keeping him toasty - and you realise you recognise his posture.

The mop of bleached hair is pretty damn recognisable, too.

"Jieun," you hiss quietly, drawing her attention from the stock she's counting in front of the kiosk. She glances towards you, eyes startled by your tone. You beckon your head back, and she scurries over to you.

"Can you man the till?"

She looks confused for a second. "Why?"

"Girl issues," you lie, knowing she won't be able to say no. "Just came on my period. Need to, yanno-"

"Go, go, go," she nods, hurrying behind the counter, ushering you away and towards the staff room door.

As you leave, you glance to the curved mirror in the far corner; the one that only you look in. It's your second pair of eyes - but you find another pair staring back at you. It's brief, and his gaze drops as soon as he sees you focus on him, blonde hair covering his dark eyes from your view. He's looking at the gimbap again, now. Pretending like he never saw you.

Good, you think. Fuck off.

It's been three days since he stood you up; three days since you jeopardised one of your best friends lives to see him, only for him to be M.I.A. You don't know the kid, not really. Why waste any more of your time on him?

You stay in the bathroom for upwards of five minutes. Just enough time for him to leave. Jieun must be wondering what you're doing, but you'll just explain it away.

You're quite good at that. Lying. Just little ones, white lies. Porkies. Fibs. Never anything that will harm another person, just things that will protect you instead.

"Who's the blonde dude?" Jieun asks when you return. You furrow your brows and play dumb. "The one with the brow piercing," she adds, as if you need any clarification. Blonde dudes aren't really the norm around these parts. He sticks out like a sore fucking thumb. "Tattoos."

"Dunno," you say with a smile. It's the same one that laces all of your little lies.

For once, Jieun looks at you, her thick brows hard and poised, as if she knows you're lying.

And then she nods towards the counter, where a peach tea and a cup of ice sits. "Left this for you."

"Hmm," you purr. "Must think I'm someone I'm not."

Yeah, you think scornfully. Must think I'm an idiot.

It worked as an apology once before - but it's a pattern of behaviour, now. He's a leopard, spots unchanged as he runs away from the consequences of his actions, suffocating you in the dust clouds he leaves behind.

"He's cute," Jieun muses.

"No," you smile. It's the same one. That little one full of lies. "He's not."

────────────

The peach tea sits on the counter by the till for two days. It's tucked behind a box of pocket money candies, which are waiting to be restocked; hidden in such a way so that only you know it's there.

Y'see, you've been making assumptions again - though you wouldn't really call this one an assumption. It's acceptance of a habit that's been proven: he will return.

He always does, it seems.

And sure enough, that afternoon, two days after you'd last been graced with his presence, he returns.

Jieun spots him first, eyes darting immediately towards yours. You're like a deer in headlights, ready to bolt - but she doesn't let you.

"Gotta go," she squeaks, before mouthing 'girl issues' to you, with a smile she reserves moments like these; her little victories.

He does his usual rounds, and you're already mentally ringing it up: a bottle of soju, and a tuna gimbap roll. You glance out to the forecourt, towards pump six - but it's empty. Not a single car in sight, let alone his trusty red pony. You're confused. Brows furrowed, nostrils a little flared. Lips pouty. You big baby.

When he eventually comes to the kiosk, it takes all of your strength not to ask, 'why the fuck are you here?'

And just like all of your assumptions about him, you're wrong. Again.

No soju, no gimbap. Banana milk and bibimyun ramyeon, instead. A great combination by all accounts, but you're not gonna give him the satisfaction of letting him know you think his choice is elite.

As far as you're concerned, he can take his banana milk and shove it up his ass.

Frustratingly, he appears to find amusement in your outward expression of annoyance. There seems to be a small grin on his face, cheeks appled beneath his mask, as if he's not aware that it's painfully awkward between the pair of you.

He has no manners, you decide. No spine. No awareness of social cues, either. A triple whammy. What a catch.

But you believe that silence is a virtue, so you say nothing as you ring up his items. You don't even tell him his total - just nod towards the card machine. He follows your line of sight, watching the machine light up for a moment, before putting his card in the slot.

While he does so, you reach for the peach tea and add it to his stockpile.

"You forgot your drink again."

He looks at the pouch of tea, then up towards you. And then he repeats it, several times.

"Ouch," he says, ending his declaration of pain with a small laugh. You've got half a mind to rip the pouch open and pour it all over his shitty flannel shirt. It's blue today, paired with sweats, because apparently that's fashionable?

Boy looks like he got dressed in the dark, you think scornfully - but really, you're just annoyed with how hot you think he looks. Unreasonably hot. He's the bloody Sahara storming through Daegu's coldest winter. He's melting the river, leaving everyone wet in the process.

Or maybe not. Maybe just you-

"What's the grin for?" he teases, and you realise that you've been paying too much attention to your thoughts.

"No grin," you snap, face flushed.

"Service with a smile, as always."

"Your transaction is done," you say, this time smiling as if butter wouldn't melt. "You can leave, now."

He holds up his pot of ramyeon and shrugs, before glancing over to the food station, where the hot water and microwaves are waiting for him. "Actually, I think I'm just gonna eat here."

Without even so much as a glance back towards you, the asshole picks up a pair of chopsticks, wrapped in thin paper, and heads towards the food station. You're in a state of disbelief. Entitled prick.

Jieun returns almost as soon as he's left the counter. She still doesn't have a clue about whatever's happened between the pair of you, but she did see you hiding up the peach tea a couple of days ago, so she figured it was something.

"You gonna take it to him?" she asks, nodding down towards the tea, which he's left at the counter, again.

"No."

"Take him the tea."

"No."

"Take it."

"No.

"Fine," she huffs. "If you don't, I will-"

"Fine!" you whisper, though it's definitely a shout. You might not want anything to do with him, but you also don't want to watch him work his charms on Jieun. For her benefit. Not yours. Definitely not because you don't want to see him flirting with her instead.

Him, with his stupid tattoos, and dumb blonde hair, and annoying smile and-

"Go," she grins.

"Just... give me a minute."

You watch as he fills up his ramyeon bowl, hot air steaming around the jet of water. It's been a while since you ate, and you're a little jealous. Your break isn't for another few hours yet, though, so smelling his food throughout the store will be torture. Asshole.

He sits down, and Jieun pesters you a little more, but you're trying to wait it out. If a customer comes in, then you can just deal with them instead - but the forecourt is empty, just like it always is at this awkward time of day. After lunch, but before the end of school. This is the real ghost shift of a gas station - after midnight is when it comes alive.

Admittedly, it was a little too lively the night of the raid. You make a mental note to text Yoongi on your break, just to check-in, and then you glare at Jieun and her shit-eating grin, before heading towards gimbap-less Mr Gimbap.

Tossing the bag down onto the cheap plastic table, you're indifferent as you speak. "Like I said. This is yours."

"Is it?" he asks, unpierced brow raised. "Doesn't look like mine."

"Well, it is," you say, clearly fed up with him. "And just while we're talking - where's your car?"

His eyes narrow ever so briefly. Almost like he knows you're onto him. For what? No clue. But something.

"Taillights out. Just needs a repair."

You nod. Seems plausible. At least he sticks to the highway code - even if he does break it after the clock strikes twelve every other weekend.

You're not quite sure what to make of him as he looks at you, eyes only lingering for long enough to let you know that there's something he's not telling you.

The air quality isn't bad today. There's no need for him to be wearing a mask, but he's hiding. From you? From something else? You can't work him out.

Perhaps it's shame.

After all, this is a boy who came and apologised to you for being a little bit mean in the heat of the moment. Being deliberately cruel doesn't really seem like his motive, no matter how cold his demeanour is.

And so, instead of just letting your assumptions fester, you voice them.

"You're hiding something."

You're met with silence.

"Behind that mask," you clarify, before repeating yourself. "You're hiding something."

He looks at you for a moment, before dropping your gaze, and glancing towards the door.

Thinking about making a run for it, you lament internally - but he's not. He just doesn't like how sometimes - just sometimes - your assumptions are entirely correct.

He lifts his ringed index finger to his ear, unhooking the thin black elastic that keeps his mask in place, before letting it fall. His skin is clammy beneath it from the heat of his breath, and the chill of the winter breeze outside, but your eyes fall to his bottom lip.

It's split, the centre crease darker than the soft pink flesh around it. There's a bruise beneath it, still tender and sore. You don't mean to, but you gasp at the sight of it. It's no worse than Yoongi's graze, the placement makes it so much more bothersome.

Uncomfortable with the way you're looking at him - like you feel sorry for him - he hooks his mask back up again.

"Happy now?" he asks, knowing that you just love to be proven right.

You scoff, a little offended. "Obviously not. What happened?" You take the seat opposite his. "Are you okay?"

"Nothing happened," he lies, avoiding your eyes as he does so. It's funny how you haven't noticed that little trait of his yet. You will. Just not yet. "I'm fine."

"You're quite clearly not fine."

"Quite clearly am," he bickers, before nodding to the food on the table. "Just hungry."

Ouch. You're just trying to make sure he's okay, but if he wants to be hostile again, then fine. No skin off your back.

You nod, looking away. It's awkward, and when the bell chimes to indicate another customer entering the shop, you find your stomach lurching.

Still, he toys with the softening noodles in their pot, as if they're the most fascinating things in the world.

This isn't how he wanted this conversation to go. Hell, he doesn't even know what the outcome should be. He's just feeling uneasy, as if he's making all the wrong choices.

"I heard about the raid."

You nod. It's been on all the local radio stations. Thankfully Yoongi is the only employee being name-checked. You aren't ready to give up your own personal paradise just yet, which is exactly what will happen the second your family gets notice of where you're spending your days.

"Yeah, me too," you deadpan. It's a fault of yours, giving back the same energy you receive, unable to just suck things up and be nice all the time.

Thankfully, he smiles. You kind of expected that he would. He seems to get you, get your humour. It's something you both share, like a little secret. A smile rests on his lips as he glances up towards you, like he's a school kid trying not to giggle in class.

And then you find yourself making assumptions again. You wonder what he would have been like in school, if he would have been just as charming. You bet that he was the kind of kid who could get away with murder in class. All he'd have to do was flash those of eyes of his, and he'd be off the hook.

Sort of like how he does with you. Why else would you be giving him the time of day after he stood you up?

"Oh really?" He entertains your attitude."What did you hear?"

You lean against the table, a little bit provocative, but only 'cause his tone of voice matched it. "Heard that I'm lucky some prick asked me out, even if he did leave me waiting for hours in the dark."

His smile falters a little, but only for a fraction of a second. He likes the flirt; doesn't like the acknowledgement of what he did. "Hours?"

"Nah," you scrunch your nose up, and sit up straight again. You're still smiling, to let him know that you're feeling fine about it, now. "Didn't stick around for that long. What?" You laugh when he raises a brow, and begin to tell white lies. He'll see through them, but you want him to. "You think I don't have other eligible bachelors lining up, trying to take me on dates?"

He shrugs, and you can tell that he's pouting a little behind his mask. "I'm still the one you skived off work for, am I not?"

"That's neither here nor there."

"Yeah, it is," he speaks softly, leaning forward on the table. Closer. "What time do you clock off today? I wanna talk. Properly."

"Are we not talking properly now?" You say, unable to resist being difficult. It takes everything within his power not to roll those pretty eyes of his - but you're grinning, and he finds himself doing the same back. His mouth may be covered by his mask, but you can still tell.

He thinks about his response for a moment. If he's being honest, he wants to make some crude remark; tell you that he wants to get you talking just so he can think of ways to shut you up. You're not at that level yet, though. Coming on strong is unfavoured by him, so he opts for something a little cooler.

"We're talking about talking," he reminds you, picking up the pot up and leaning over to the sink by the food station to drain the excess water. "I wanna talk about... well, anything else."

You purse your lips, folding your arms across your chest. There's part of you that really wants to say no, to tell him to go fuck himself. But there's a teeny tiny part of you that wants to say-

"Nine. I'm off at nine."

"Nine," he nods. "I'll be here."

"Sure you will," you tease.

"I will."

"Yeah, yeah. Course. You're really good at that." You're nodding enthusiastically, a stupid smile on your face, eyes all wide as if you couldn't be more naive. You can tell he's smiling again, and it's like that door chime in your stomach is bloody broken. "Yanno, the whole showing up when you say you will, thing."

"Shut up," he laughs, but it catches in his throat like a low growl. "I'll be here, but not if you keep being a little bitch."

Your teeth cushion themselves on your bottom lip, and you nod. "See you at nine... Kook?" You question, realising that you're yet to actually ask his name.

"Jungkook. But Kook works, too. Just depends on how well acquainted you're planning on getting."

He doesn't give you a chance to reply, simply standing as he pushes the pot of noodles over to you. "Eat up. You look hungry."

Turning on his heel, he heads for the door.

The bell chimes, and it's like it's harmonising with the feeling in your stomach.

You prod around at the noodles, and sigh, posture defeated. This is not good.

────────────

The rest of your shift trudges on. It's slow, the hands of the clock seemingly frozen - until, suddenly, it's nine.

"You're late," Jungkook greets you, perched on a bollard by the side of the forecourt. He's wearing a coat, now, wrapped up a little warmer than he had been earlier. His sweats have been traded for jeans, but he's still in that big blue flannel shirt. You like it.

And he's not wrong - cashing up your till took a little longer than normal, thanks to an old note that wouldn't read properly in the sorter. Just another thing your boss refuses to upgrade.

"At least I'm here," you quip back.

"Touché." He holds out his arm, almost as if he expects you to link yours with his. "Shall we?"

You look at his arm, then up towards him. And then you repeat it, letting out a soft laugh, not accepting his arm, instead turning to walk in the direction of home. "C'mon," you call back. "You walking me home or not?"

It's his turn to laugh now as he ups his pace to catch up with you. "Not."

"Not?"

"Not," he repeats, seemingly unable to say anything else - until, of course, he does. "My cars around the corner. Wanna go for a drive?"

"Sorted the taillight?" You ask, curious, figuring that it would have been at Kang's overnight.

Jungkook hums a response, not really saying yes or no, but as you turn the corner and it comes into vision, you can see that his taillights seem fine - not that you can really judge. A car as old as his doesn't come with central locking systems, so it's not like you'll see the lights flash as it-

Oh. Nevermind.

There's a beep, and the car flashes in front of you, mocking those damn assumptions of yours.

"Since when do Pony's have electric locks?" You ask defensively, almost as a reflex for having your assumptions disproven.

"Since I decided to install them," he says, as if it's the simplest job in the world. You've heard Yoongi mutter 'bastard locks' enough times to know otherwise.

"Kang's must make a killing from you," you joke as he nods towards the passenger side, indicating for you to get in.

"Kang's don't make shit from me when it comes to the wires."

You wait for him to pop his door open before you do the same. The interior is leather, all black, and is cold to the touch as you get in. The windscreen begins to fog almost instantly, the minimal heat you're letting off proving just how cold it's been getting lately.

It's curious, you think. There should be a little heat left in the car from his drive to meet you.

"No?" you question, choosing to ignore the temperature of the car. It's below zero, you rationalise. Of course it cooled quickly.

"No," he shakes his head, turning the key in the ignition.

The car rumbles - purrs - softly. You can tell he's listening to the engine, making sure that it sounds okay before he sets off. Standard old car problems. Running gas through the motor before it warms up only causes issues.

Like his locking system, you notice that the stereo isn't exactly true to the era in which the car was built (even if the lack of insulation is). It's got an aux cord hanging from the headphone jack, which he picks up and places in your lap. "Don't put anything shit on."

He avoids clarifying your question, and it annoys you - so you choose to be direct about it, not plugging your phone in at all. If he doesn't want to listen to shit music, he should be a more specific.

You're stewing, clearly irritated, but you're also casually enamoured, watching him as he carefully observes the dashboard, checking the revs, trying to heat the car up a little.

"Just the electrics? What about everything else?"

He doesn't look your way as he replies. "Just the electrics. Put your seatbelt on."

"Why?"

He's still not looking at you. "'Cause if I crash, you'll go straight through the windshield."

"Not the seatbelt," you reply, though he's got a point. You haven't clicked it into its buckle yet. Nor has he, though. "The electrics."

Still. Not. Looking. At. You.

It's not even like it's an important question. You couldn't give a flying fuck about his shitty car's electrics. You just don't like that he's deliberately avoiding answering something so simple, as if you're asking him how old he was when he lost his virginity.

Eventually, he cracks. It's as he's sliding his seatbelt down, the smooth noise of fabric scruffing against plastic filling the car. He's bargaining - hopes that if he does his belt up, then you will too.

Then again, he knows that you're difficult, and that you'll probably use it as a bargaining tool. You won't do it up until he gives you an answer.

"Electrician by trade," he says with a little sigh, before turning to face you finally. "Happy?"

You don't want to say yes - but you are. You're smug in the knowledge that you know just as much about him now as he does you.

"By trade?" You push a little further as your buckle clicks into place.

"By trade," he answers, in that annoying way he so often does, not really giving you an answer, just confirming what you already know. "I'm in between jobs at the moment."

"Ah," you smile, finally putting the aux into your phone. The windows are beginning to clear. "That explains why you're always in the garage at such weird hours."

It doesn't. There's an entirely different explanation for that. Not one that he'll give, though.

He hums a response, not wanting to tell more lies. He knocks the car into first, and lets the handbrake down, easing the car into motion as it rolls gently from the curb and into the road.

It's at this point you realise you're in the car with a near-stranger, and that it's probably the dumbest thing you've done in a while. You're smarter than this. Been raised better.

Jungkook smiles at your statement, though. "You ever stop making assumptions?"

A laugh falters in the back of your throat. "No," you muse. "I don't think I do."

His palm rests on the gear stick, thigh pressing down against his seat as he dips the clutch. There's a simple joy to be found in watching his movements like this, as if you're getting to see something reserved for very few people. He's smiling as he knocks it into second gear. Smiles a lot around you, actually.

Perhaps he's just like this all the time. Naturally light natured, despite the dark clothes and even darker eyes.

"Tell me mine," he says as the car moves from the slightly beat up side road, towards the main street that leads up to the bridge. There's a change in pressure beneath the tyres, the new road far smoother, far easier, than the one you'd been on previously. "Your assumptions. I wanna hear them."

"I can't," you reply, as if they're some closely guarded secret. In a way, they are. You've built up this idea of Jungkook; of who he is, who he associates with, what he does in the dark.

If he confirms or denies a single one of these assumptions, then it could all be in tatters.

"Can't? Or don't want to?"

You watch his hands as he flicks on an indicator. There's no one else on the road. Seems redundant. It's interesting, though, how he seems to care about the rules of the road now that you're in the passenger seat.

"Why can't it be both?"

And just like that, you're going round in circles again. Always talking, but never quite saying anything. It's a strange little dance you like to do, one that you don't know the steps to, but seem to get right anyway.

He uses the palm of his hand to turn the wheel, back on the bridge now. It's less icy today, but you find your heart resting in your chest just like it did the first time you were here with him. He glances over to you, but you keep your eyes straight ahead.

"I'm sorry," he says quietly. "About that time. When we were here, yanno?"

You nod. It's a weird thing to think about. You could have died. Came pretty fucking close to it - and yet all that really lingers in your mind from that night is the way he stared you down.

"Mhmm," you press your lips together, and cross your legs.

He doesn't like it. The way your body sort of angles away from his. It's cold. Cruel, almost.

So he lifts his hand from the gear stick and taps your knee. A request, not a demand. He's gentle as he nudges, encouraging your legs to unhook, until they're back in their original position. You just kind of let him. Neither of you say anything, but there's an awareness that he doesn't want you to close off from him.

Your arms move instead, without much thought, crossing over themselves.

"Don't."

The silence is so loud you think the windows might shatter.

"Please," he follows it up, then decides that he needs something to fill the void that you're leaving in the conversation. "Put some music on," he says, before backtracking on his earlier statement. "I don't mind if it's shit."

It earns a small smile from you, an exhale from your nose letting him know that you find humour in his words.

You unlock your phone and head to spotify, confronted with more playlists than you know what to do with, and settle on the one you use when Yoongi lets you control the music in his car. It's pretty inoffensive, you think. Nothing too shit. No noughties classics, at least, though there are a couple from the 80's. If he complains, you'll just remind him of how old his car is.

"So what's the deal?"

The fact you only start talking as he exits the bridge isn't lost on Jungkook.

"No deal," he replies just as casually as you asked.

"Well you aren't taking me home," you muse, glancing over to him. There's a smile on his face. Dimples present. "And I'm hoping that you're not chauffeuring me to a date with the Grim Reaper - so where are we going?"

"We-" He turns to face you, now. Just briefly. Just a glance with a smile that has a chime sounding in your tummy again. "-are heading into town. I don't think the Grim Reaper's gonna be there, but you never know with that dude. Always showing up at the worst of times."

"Mm," you agree with a small laugh. "His social skills are atrocious."

"You give him a run for his money, yanno," Jungkook teases you.

It's reflex, more than anything, that has you swatting at his shoulder. The fabric of his shirt is soft, and there's a waft of his aftershave as you draw your hand back to your lap. Oaky. Mature. Probably more than he seems to be.

"My social skills are fine. You're just shitty company."

"Me?!" He sounds affronted now, but there's a grin plastered all over his pretty little face. "Sorry, little miss clutch control. Forgot you were queen of making casual conversation."

"Uh-huh," you say as you shift in your seat, body angled towards his. The smile on his face grows. There's one on yours too. A pretty fuckin' big one, at that. "That's why they hired me. Could see I'd be great with the customers."

He snorts, crown of his head tipping against the back of his seat. "Oh, yeah?"

You hum an affirmation, and Jungkook looks towards you briefly, chin lifted, eyes narrow, curious of what you'll say next.

"Well, I seem to have done alright with one of the customers, at least."

His teeth begin to show as he looks towards the road again. "Poor fucker. I'd hate to be him."

And then you're both laughing.

It's how it remains for the rest of the evening.

You're laughing when he parks in the furthest corner of the lot, just to make sure no one scrapes his paintwork. You're laughing when he can't figure out the QR code for the automatic parking fee, and you're laughing when he tells you to fuck off for laughing.

But he's laughing too.

Laughs when you can't figure out the apron in the dakgalbi place off the side of the main shopping street, and laughs when the middle-aged lady running the shop comes to help you out. Jungkook had refused. He was enjoying the struggle too much.

See, your cheeks go all red when you get flustered. He's never seen that look on you before. You get a similar look once you realise the spice of the galbi is a little hotter than what you're used to, and you get it again after you've had a few shots of soju.

He matches you, shot for shot, but also makes sure to keep filling up your stainless steel water cup. In fact, he fills it more than he fills his own.

Unlike you, and your perceived ability to judge characters, Jungkook actually can read people pretty well. He knows his limits, and he's guessing at yours, but doing a good job doing so.

It's not until Jungkook's paying that you realise just how many bottles the pair of you have gotten through. You're steady on your feet, but you can feel the alcohol in your system, and know that he must be the same.

"How we getting home?" You ask, as the chime of the door rings behind you. Within seconds you're pulling your arms over your chest, trying to preserve heat. You fucking hate January.

"C'mon," he mumbles, looping his arm around your shoulders, rubbing at the side of it quickly to build up some heat. He's all hunched up too, clearly feeling the cold. "Taxi? I can pick my car up in the morning."

It's gone twelve on a week night. You both know there's no way in hell you'll be able to score a taxi, not without a 45 minute wait, at least. The curse of downtown Daegu. Should have just gone to eat in your neighbourhood, but Jungkook felt like he had a point to prove. He wanted to make it up to you. Properly.

You drop Yoongi a text as you load up your taxi app, just checking in, letting him know that you're all good. He replies pretty much instantly, but you're distracted by Jungkook letting you know that his app says no cabs are available.

"Shit," you hiss, bouncing around on the balls of your feet, trying to keep warm.

Jungkook weighs up his options. On the one hand, he knows he needs to get you home. On the other, you're hopping around like a fucking bunny. It's borderline cruel to keep you out in the cold like this. Especially when his place is only a ten minute walk away, in the heart of town, compared to your hour long trek back to the outskirts.

"My place isn't too far."

The suggestion is out of his mouth before he knows any better. He's getting himself in too deep already. All it's taken is a couple weeks of awkward flirting across a gas station kiosk and exactly one (1) shared dakgalbi. Maybe the 6 bottles of soju didn't help.

"You can wait it out in the warm for a taxi, at least," he adds on, before realising that you're both as tipsy as one another. Both hovering a little too close to one another. Both feeling that weird pull, of which he's telling himself to ignore, but he just can't seem to help himself.

He's a simple man, of simple pleasures - and sex is the most simple of them all.

If he wants it, then you probably do, too.

Might do, he corrects himself. Best not to make assumptions about things like these.

"Wait it out," you nod, a little grin resting on your lips. They're a little plumper than normal, partially thanks to the galbi spice, but also thanks to the you've been biting down on them all evening. It's okay, though. Jungkook's lips are just as bad. All plump and pretty and - fuck. You know you're staring but it's kind of hard not to.

He knocks his head to the side and holds out his hand for you to take. "C'mon. I'm this way."

And so you do take it. Fingers neatly linking between his, hooking on and holding close as if it isn't the first time that it's happening. It's been so long since you did this with another person that you're almost not sure you're doing it right. His grip adjusts, and then his other hand reaches behind your shoulders to prop the hood of your jacket over your hair.

"For the wind," he says.

Definitely not so that the pair of you are a little more incognito.

It's why he puts his hood up, too... For the wind.

After all, he's not hiding behind his mask like he was earlier. Not hiding from you.

But he's hiding from something.

And you should be, too.

────────────

minors dni // posted to wp late 2021 // series masterlist

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37sommz · 28 days ago

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❁ : seek & destroy . . .

✼. masterlist — taglist — request. ✼. genre: light angst. ✼. wc: 3.7k.

monza has always been one of michaela's favorite races. on her first time returning to monza so far away from the cherry red suits, she has something to prove to herself.

✼. warnings: language, mattia binotto jumpscare, zak brown jumpscare.

✼. notes: a lil something about michaela's second win! 2021 season is almost over, there's maybe two more chapters to write. expect another story about the myla subplot within the next few days <3

000.⠀⠀SEPTEMBER 11, 2021 › Monza, Italy.

Michaela sat in the cramped cockpit of her McLaren car, the faint scent of rubber and gasoline clinging to her fireproof suit. Her heart hammered in her chest as the engine roared to life, the vibrations resonating through her bones. The 2021 Formula 1 season was heating up, and the tension in the air was palpable as the teams prepared for the Italian Grand Prix at the historic Monza circuit. The sun was high in the sky, casting sharp shadows across the track, as the pit lane buzzed with activity.

The past few days had been a whirlwind of media interviews and speculation about her future in the sport, with the looming shadow of Ferrari's decision to pass her over for Carlos Sainz weighing heavily on her shoulders. Jenson had tried to shield her from the storm, reminding her of their private oasis away from the glaring spotlight. But now, as she waited for the qualifying session to begin, she couldn't help but feel the weight of the world watching her every move.

The green light flashed, signaling the start of qualifying. She took a deep breath, her gloved hands gripping the steering wheel tightly. The tires screeched as she launched off the line, the power of the car pushing her back into the seat. Each turn, each gear shift, was executed with precision, her focus unwavering. The crowd roared as she set a blistering lap time in the final session, beating out even her own expectations. She could feel the excitement building within the McLaren garage as she climbed out of the car, sweat beading on her forehead despite the cool breeze that danced through the open air.

Her trainer, Luisa, gave her a thumbs up from the garage wall, her smile wide and proud at the pole position. But before she could bask in the moment, her eyes locked with Mattia Binotto's, the Ferrari team principal, who watched her from the Ferrari pit wall. His expression was a mix of surprise and something that looked uncomfortably close to irritation. The reminder of the seat that could've been hers was a stark reminder of the pressure she faced.

Their eyes met, and she could feel the unspoken challenge. Binotto was a man of few words, but the silence between them was louder than any engine on the grid. "You know you're better than this," he said, his Italian words cutting through the noise as he passed her on his way back to his garage. "Ferrari made a mistake, but that doesn't mean you should settle for second best."

Michaela's cheeks flushed, but she held her ground. "I'm not here to prove anything to you," she shot back in her near-perfect Italian. Her time at Prema and then at Alfa Romeo had done more than just lit a fire under her to be the best. It had given her the gift of a second fluency, one that came in handy when she found herself caught up in tense battles with the Prancing Horses.

The tense conversation was cut short by the need for the drivers to report back to their respective garages. The tension between her and Binotto was palpable as she marched back to McLaren. Inside the garage, she found Lando Norris waiting for her, his expression a mirror of Binotto's. Their relationship had been strained since her arrival, the young Briton feeling overshadowed by her relentless drive and unyielding ambition.

"What did he say to you?" Lando asked, his voice a mix of curiosity and resentment.

Michaela shrugged off the question, her eyes focused on the data screens in front of her. "Nothing that concerns you," she replied, her tone cold.

"It's all everyone's talking about," Lando pressed, his voice rising. "How you should've been in red instead of slumming it here with me."

Michaela whipped around, the fire in her eyes surprising even herself. "I'm not slumming it anywhere, Lando. I'm fighting for every inch of track, for every point, for every win, just like you."

The garage fell silent as their teammates and engineers looked on, sensing the animosity. Zak Brown stepped in, his voice firm. "That's enough. We're here to race as a team, not tear each other apart."

Michaela's eyes flashed with anger before she spun on her heel and stormed out, her heart racing. She needed air, space, anything to get away from the suffocation of the garage. She found herself by the team motorhome, her thoughts racing. The pressure to outperform, to prove she was the better choice, was crushing her.

000.⠀⠀SEPTEMBER 12, 2021 › Monza, Italy.

The day of the race dawned with a clear blue sky, the anticipation thick in the air. The sound of engines roared through the historic circuit as the drivers took to the track for their final preparations. As she stood on the track, waiting for the Italian national anthem to be sung, she couldn't help but think of the conversation with Lando the day before. Despite their differences, they were a team, and she knew she needed to find a way to work with him.

Michaela took a moment to find her focus, blocking out the noise around her. The grid was a sea of color and movement, with the Ferrari fans dressed in red, creating a stark contrast to the papaya orange of McLaren. Her eyes found Carlos Sainz, standing confidently beside his new Ferrari teammate. He looked over at her and gave a smug smile, whispering something to his teammate, Charles Leclerc, who chuckled in response. As the Il Canto degli Italiani began to play through the circuit's loudspeakers, a rush of longing washed over the Australian. Michaela felt the weight of the moment, the pressure to perform at her peak, and the bitterness of being so close to her dream and yet so far. She took her position on the grid, the eyes of the Tifosi upon her.

The lights went out, and the race was on.

Michaela's McLaren shot forward, her tires chirping as she defended her pole position into the first chicane. The first few laps were a blur of speed and strategy, each turn and overtake a delicate dance of the power and precision of the 20 drivers. The Italian crowd raved as the cars weaved through the historic circuit enjoying the roar of engines that echoed through the grandstands.

Her eyes remained fixed ahead, but she could feel the presence of the Ferrari's behind her, particularly Carlos'. Every time she caught a glimpse of his car in her mirrors, it was like a dagger twisting in her gut. The race was a battle not just for victory but for validation. She pushed herself harder, her every move calculated, her driving a silent declaration of her worthiness.

The tension grew with each lap, the cars jostling for position, the strategies unfolding. The heat from the asphalt was intense, and beads of sweat began to form on her brow, stinging her eyes as she leaned into the tight corners. The race was a physical and mental marathon, and she was in the lead, refusing to let anyone pass. Her mind was a whirlwind of thoughts—Ferrari's decision, Lando's words, Jenson's comforting whispers—but she pushed them aside, focusing solely on the task at hand.

Michaela's heart rate spiked as she approached the halfway point. A rare mistake from a rival brought out the safety car, and the engineer in her ear urged caution. But she knew this was her chance to extend her lead, to show Ferrari what they were missing. As the safety car peeled away, she floored the accelerator, the engine screaming as she shot ahead of the pack. The crowd roared as she streaked across the line, the Ferraris struggling to keep up in 6th and 7th.

She pushed her McLaren to the limit, and her every move was a silent challenge to the home team. The team radio crackled with tension as her engineer reminded her of the strategy, but she was in the zone—fueled by the desire to prove herself to everyone who had doubted her.

The race was a sprint to the finish, with every driver giving it their all. The walls of the Monza track seemed to close in on her as she approached the final few laps, her heart hammering in her chest. The roar of Lando's McLaren engine grew louder in her mirrors, but she held her line, her instincts sharp.

A daring overtake attempt by Lando saw her forced to the edge of the track, the gravel whispering against the side of her car. The crowd held its collective breath as she kept her cool, not letting the Englishman pass. The move was a statement—she was not just fighting for the podium, she was fighting for her reputation.

The final lap approached, and the tension was unbearable. The roar of the engines grew louder, the smell of burning rubber more intense. Her knuckles were white on the steering wheel, and every muscle in her body was taut with the effort of keeping the car on the racing line. She could see the checkered flag in the distance, a beacon of victory and vindication.

Michaela's mind raced faster than the car she piloted. She thought of the sleepless nights spent studying every inch of this track, the countless hours in the simulator, the sacrifices she had made for this moment. She could almost feel the eyes of the Ferrari fans on her, willing her to fail. But she was not here to make them happy. This was her race, her chance to show the world that she was more than a rejected prospect.

The final corner, Parabolica, loomed ahead. The longest and fastest on the track, it was a corner that could make or break a race. She took a deep breath and committed to her line, feeling the G-forces push her into the seat as she roared around it. The crowd's cheers grew to a crescendo as she crossed the finish line, taking the checkered flag before anyone else.

Michaela's heart was racing as she pulled into the pit lane, the weight of the victory heavy in her chest. She climbed out of the cockpit, her legs wobbly from the intense physical exertion. The adrenaline rush washed over her as she was embraced by her team, the feeling of victory sweet on her lips. The podium was a blur of flashing lights and champagne spray, the gold trophy gleaming in the sun.

As she stepped down from the podium, she was bombarded by reporters eager for a piece of the story. Questions about Ferrari's decision to pass her over were thrown at her left and right. She took a deep breath, her eyes scanning the sea of faces. "Today was about driving for McLaren and for myself," she said, her voice steady. "I'm not here to discuss what could've been. I'm here to celebrate what is." Her answers were short, her smile tight.

The press conference was even more intense. One journalist in particular took pleasure in poking at the open wound, asking if she felt she had proven a point to Ferrari today. She met his gaze, her eyes like fire. "Every time I get in the car, I race to win," she said, her voice cool and measured. "Today was no different."

After the press conference, as she made her way through the crowded paddock, she felt the weight of the day's events finally catching up with her. The victory that had seemed so sweet on the podium now tasted bittersweet. Her eyes searched the sea of faces for Jenson, finding him in the distance, talking with some of the other drivers.

The moment their eyes met, she felt a rush of relief. He broke away from the group and walked over to her, his eyes filled with understanding. "You okay?" he asked gently, placing a hand on her shoulder.

Michaela took a deep breath, trying to compose herself. "I don't know," she replied honestly. "It's just...this win feels empty. Like I'm not allowed to truly enjoy it." Though her fingers twitched with the need to feel the warmth of his embrace, she was keenly aware of the eyes surrounding them in the paddock. Media, staff, and drivers alike wandered between tents with no sense of privacy for the unknown couple.

"You can't let them win," Jenson said, his voice low and soothing. "You've worked too hard, come too far."

Michaela nodded, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. "I know, but it's hard not to feel guilty about everything. The secret, the pressure..."

Jenson pulled her aside, his voice a whisper. "Guilt doesn't serve you on the track, Mick. Let it go." His eyes searched hers, and she saw the love and support she so desperately needed.

Michaela took a deep, shaky breath, nodding. He was right. She had to focus on the here and now. But as they walked back to the McLaren garage, the reality of their secret relationship weighed on her. They couldn't celebrate openly, couldn't share in this moment of triumph as they truly wanted to.

Inside the garage, the atmosphere was a mix of elation and relief. Her teammates and mechanics congratulated her, their faces beaming with pride. But amidst the celebration, she caught a glimpse of Lando's downturned expression. He had pushed her hard today, and she knew she had hurt him with her earlier words yesterday.

She made her way over, extending a hand. "Good race, Lando," she said, her voice sincere.

He looked up, the anger in his eyes fading to something softer. "Yeah," he said, taking her hand and pulling her into a friendly hug. "Congrats on the win, Mick."

Michaela felt a flicker of regret for their earlier argument. "Thanks," she murmured, returning the embrace. "I'm sorry for what I said yesterday."

Lando pulled back, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. "You know what, I get it. We're all fighting our own battles. Just remember, we're on the same side."

Michaela nodded, feeling a weight lifted. She knew that she had to address the tension between them if she wanted to move forward as a team. "Let's get some rest tonight, and talk about it tomorrow?" she offered.

Lando nodded, and she knew that was the best she could hope for at the moment. The night was still young, and the celebrations were in full swing. The roar of the party grew louder as they approached the McLaren hospitality area, but the sound of laughter and music didn't fill her with the same joy it usually did. She found a quiet corner, her thoughts swirling with the day's events.

The victory had been significant, but it was overshadowed by the constant reminder of what could've been. Her eyes searched the crowd again for Jenson, feeling a pang of longing. The secret of their relationship was a burden she hadn't anticipated. It was one thing to keep it from the media, but quite another to hide from her own team.

As the night progressed, the celebrations grew wilder. The champagne flowed, and the laughter grew louder, but Michaela felt a million miles away. She found a quiet spot outside the garage, the cool night air a welcome relief from the stifling heat inside. The sound of engines winding down and the clank of tools being packed away provided a rhythmic backdrop to her tumultuous thoughts.

Her eyes searched the bustling paddock once more, and she spotted Jenson signing autographs, surrounded by adoring fans. He looked up, catching her gaze, and the connection between them was palpable. With a sigh, she turned away, feeling the sting of their secret more sharply than ever.

Michaela pulled her phone out of her pocket, scrolling through the messages of congratulations from friends and family. Her thumb hovered over her mother's name, knowing she would be proud but also concerned about the stress she'd been under. Her mother's words echoed in her mind: "You don't have to win every race, just remember why you started." It was a gentle reminder to find joy in the journey, not just the destination.

With a heavy heart, she slipped away from the festivities, needing a moment to herself. She walked down the pit lane, the garages of other teams now empty as they packed up for the night. The Ferrari garage was still a hive of activity, and she couldn't help but feel a pang of envy. It was there, in the quiet, that she allowed the tears to fall.

The sudden sound of footsteps had her quickly wiping her face, expecting a well-meaning team member or a persistent journalist. But it was neither. It was Carlos Sainz, looking as surprised to see her as she was to see him.

"Michaela?" he called out, his voice filled with genuine concern.

Michaela took a deep breath and turned around, trying to compose herself. "I'm fine," she said, her voice steady despite the tremble in her chest.

Carlos walked closer, his eyes scanning her face. "You don't look fine," he said softly. "What's going on?"

Michaela hesitated for a moment, unsure of how much to share with her rival. But the sincerity in his voice made her feel a sudden kinship. "It's just... I wanted to prove something today," she said, her voice cracking. "To Ferrari, to everyone who said I didn't deserve a shot."

Carlos nodded, understanding in his eyes. "I know that feeling," he said, his voice low. "But you can't let them upset you. You're a great driver, and you showed that today."

Michaela looked at him, surprised by his kindness. "Thank you," she murmured. "It's just hard, you know?"

Carlos nodded. "More than anyone," he said, his voice filled with empathy. "But remember, you're racing for yourself now. Prove to Ferrari that they made a mistake, sure. But do it for you."

Michaela took a moment to let his words sink in, a small smile playing on her lips. "Thank you, Carlos."

He returned the smile, the tension between them momentarily forgotten. "Good luck for the rest of the season," he said before turning back to the Ferrari garage.

Michaela watched him go, feeling a newfound respect for the man who had taken the seat she had once coveted. With a sigh, she headed back to the McLaren area, her steps lighter than before. As she approached the back entrance of the hospitality suite, she spotted Guido waiting for her, his eyes filled with concern.

"You okay?" he asked, reaching out to wipe a tear from her cheek.

Michaela nodded, taking a deep breath. "Yeah, just... a lot to process."

Guido wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a warm embrace. She leaned into him, feeling his heartbeat against her chest, steady and reassuring. "You don't have to do this alone," he whispered.

Michaela pulled back, looking up into his eyes. "But I do," she said softly. "The results, the pressure... it's all on me."

Guido’s expression was filled with a mix of frustration and empathy, worry lines etched themselves into his forehead, standing out against his fair skin.

"I know you don’t want to hear me say it yet," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "But I can’t let you do this to yourself, cara. Especially not if you can't even enjoy a quality win like this."

Michaela knew he was right, but the fear of the unknown was paralyzing. "I know," she said, her voice a mere murmur. "It’s just..." Her arms crossed over each other, teeth gritted uncomfortably.

Guido nodded as her words failed her. "I know the risks," he said, his voice firm. "But if you’re going to keep doing this, we need to start considering our other options. I need you to be honest with me, I don’t think you’re happy here."

Michaela took a deep breath. She leaned into his presence again, feeling the comfort that exuded from him. "Let's talk after the weekend’s over," she said, her voice filled with hope. "When the pressure's off, and we can figure this out."

Guido nodded, a sad smile playing on his lips. "Deal," he murmured, brushing back the loose strands of his dark hair. "But remember, you're not in this alone. Win or lose, I'm here for you. We’re all here for you."

The night air was cooler now, the Italian summer giving way to a gentle evening breeze. They stood together in silence for a moment, the sound of the distant celebrations a stark contrast to their private conversation.

Michaela took a moment to absorb his words, feeling a renewed sense of determination. They had a plan, and it was something to hold onto. With a nod, she stepped back, the moment of vulnerability passing.

"I should get back in there with the team," she sniffed, her voice still thick with emotion. She wiped the stray tears that still managed to cloud her vision before pushing her shoulders back. The McLaren logo stood proud over her chest, a reminder of the team that had given her a lifeline to achieve so much more than she thought was in the cards for her this season.

"Gotta celebrate kicking the Scuderia's ass."

Guido chuckled, a hint of pride in his voice. "You definitely did that," he said, giving her one last squeeze before letting her go. "You're a bloody legend, no matter what anyone says."

Michaela took a deep breath and nodded. "Thank you, Gui Gui," she said with a level of amusement in her voice from the use of the nickname he hated so much. The weight of his words settled in her chest. "I'll try to keep that in mind." With a forced smile, she turned and headed back towards the McLaren garage, the noise of the party growing louder with each step.

✼. taglist:⠀

@cha-hot @certifiedlesbianbaddie @nichmeddar

@d3kstar @thewannabewriter @hwalllllllelujah

@thearchieves @doodlehunz @evie-119

@bxdbxtxh @seaweed-orchid @glitterquadricorn

@99snse @ginghampearlsnsweettea @alliwantisadonut

@hiireadstuff @emilyval1 @anotherblackreader

@sv5beehives @mynameisangeloflife @tellybearyyyy

@melancholyy-hill @valluvsu @futuristiccroissantlampsludge

@treehouse-mouse @sunfairyy

#⠀،،⠀&. prose.#jenson button x oc #jenson button imagine #jenson button fanfic #driver!oc #driver!reader #f1 female driver #f1 drivers #f1 driver!reader #f1 fiction #f1 fanfiction #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #formula 1 #f1 fem!driver!oc #formula one imagine

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landinrris · 10 months ago

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In which I keep seeing tweets hyping up Lando and McLaren for this season, so I needed to vent my expectations and bring myself back down to Earth. (1.1k, w/ Carlos popping up at the end) Set during the 2024 championship in which Lando and McLaren come out of the gates swinging.

Lando thought he was prepared for the possibility of getting out of his car as the newly crowned champion. God knows he’s spent enough time talking it through with his team and parents— with Carlos.

As soon as he’s across the line, he’s asking Will about the finishing order, his stomach up in his throat. The sound of Will’s voice, shaken from his usual calm as he tells Lando to hang on while the team checks the finishing positions of his main rivals nearly makes Lando lose his mind.

The wait is reminiscent of his first pole position a few years ago— how torturously long it felt in the seconds while the few remaining drivers finished their laps. But now they’re in Abu Dhabi three years removed, and Lando needs a points deficit to George of at least three and a deficit of at least one to Charles.

There’s an ocean of distance between him now and September 2021.

When Lando’s radio crackles back to life after about fifteen or so torturous seconds, it’s Andrea whose voice greets him, unsettlingly more manic than Will’s, even though he’s trying to hide it. Then again, anything other than his normal calm makes Lando suspicious.

“Would you like to know the finishing order, Lando?”

“On your own time, I think.” Lando’s voice shakes more than it ever has over the radio, betraying his nonchalant words.

Andrea just chuckles. “P1, Verstappen; P2, Carlos; P3, you; P4, Russell.” The words hang in the air for only a second or two as Lando rounds the corner onto the start-finish straight.

Screams erupt in the background, but all Lando can think about is the basic mental math he’s calculating. “Does that—”

“Lando Norris, it means you’re champion of the world!”

The screams get louder then, becoming deafening behind Andrea as they filter through the open channel. His entire team is screaming, those who ran to climb the fence as he finished making their presence known so close to the pit wall. The goal they’ve been building towards for the entire year— for their entire careers— is theirs.

Lando’s vision blurs on command, his hands coming up to clutch at his visor for a split second before he has to direct the car to the third-place placard. Lando doesn’t know how he manages it once he starts yelling with the rest of the team. He wonders if he causes anyone to yank their headset off and decides he’ll have to apologize later.

For now, though, this is his moment. This is his.

Lando manages to contain his emotions when Zak gets in on the celebration, but he loses it hearing Will’s voice again. He’s successfully parked the car and already set everything to mode zero, but Will’s voice is in his ear, and the least Lando owes this man is to listen to the rest of his engineer’s words.

“Alright buddy, get out there and celebrate.”

As soon as Lando’s feet touch the asphalt, his legs buckle out from underneath him, and he collapses by the front left tire. He needs to get up, needs to pull his helmet from his head, and go celebrate in the arms of his team and his family. But here Lando is, his body wracked with sobs while he thanks every possible force in the universe that’s enabled him to get to this point.

The side of his car isn’t as blurry when Lando opens his eyes again and shoves his visor up, his knees not as shaky when he stands, leaning on the body of the car for support.

Across the way, his team looks like they’re barely holding themselves back from storming the track. Their self-imposed barrier breaks when Lando takes a step in their direction, his car crew rushing him and sweeping him off his feet. He may not be as small as he used to be, but the arms of the guys who have been with him for six years pick him up like he is, and all Lando can do is hold on.

The bone-crushing team hugs Lando has been subject to over the years don’t come close to now— not even on the back of his first podium in Silverstone the year before. But, he supposes, nothing really is quite comparable to actually beating the odds as they have throughout this year.

Everything from the last few years rushes to the surface— every emotion and catastrophizing thought. Every question he had about resigning or not looking elsewhere at a team that could take him to the top faster. They gave way to the base satisfaction that had come with improvements and with accurate correlations.

Every thought triggers another swell of emotion, but Lando can’t think about what he looks like in the midst of it.

Later, there will be pictures Lando will probably never want to see again when he takes his helmet off to reveal his already puffy eyes, red from crying, but he doesn’t think of that now. Because now, even with his mind solidly in the present, he can’t stop getting teary-eyed with each new person who comes to congratulate him.

And then Carlos is there, his person, finished with his own team and weigh-in, and it’s a lot.

Carlos’ eyes look almost as red as Lando’s feel, which is stupid because Carlos shouldn’t be the one crying, right? They’re only about five strides from each other, but Lando takes the distance in two and a half before he launches himself into Carlos’ arms, his legs coming up almost on instinct to wrap around Carlos’ hips.

Carlos seems to expect it thankfully, and they stay upright. Lando’s never felt more protected than he does right now. Strong and warm arms grip and wrap around his back with every ounce of strength Carlos has left after a grueling two hours in the car. They’re out in the middle of everyone with their image likely being broadcast across the world, and yet Lando can’t find it in himself to care about anyone but the way Carlos’ lips press against the side of his face, the barely audible, “You did it. My champion,” above all the noise.

Lando lets himself cry.

Someone breaks them apart eventually so that both of them can give their reactions on the finish to Coulthard, who’s standing a few feet away looking excited. The distance they put between themselves isn’t a lot, one of Carlos’ hands settles on Lando’s shoulders when Lando feels himself getting weak-kneed again while Carlos is talking. He wonders if he looks like he’s going to pass out or if Carlos is just that especially tuned to Lando.

He doesn’t wonder for long though before he’s being pulled to the camera and handed the microphone Carlos had just been holding.

This is the beginning of everything. The beginning of being a champion. The beginning of the rest of his career. Lando knows he’s ready for it.

#carlando #writing tag #filched this from a long-abandoned wip and fixed her up a bit #i cannot remember the rationale for who lando was going to be up against in the championship but i remember there was math involved #which is why it's like this and reflects 2022 standings #husbands™

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invisibleicewands · 6 months ago

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Welsh should stand up to attack on culture - Sheen

Actor Michael Sheen says the Welsh public must rise up and defend its cultural institutions to prevent an "unthinkable" end to the Welsh arts sector.

He listed funding cuts at Welsh National Opera, National Theatre Wales and Museum Wales as examples of "an attack on culture" in Wales.

His comments came ahead of the Welsh debut of the play Nye, in which Sheen portrays Welsh politician Aneurin Bevan, the architect of the NHS.

The Welsh government said it has had to take “extremely difficult decisions” to focus funding on core public services, including the NHS.

Sheen, from Port Talbot, said it would "an outrage... terrible" if a continuation of funding cuts meant an end for the Welsh arts sector and insisted the public would not let that happen.

“We are not going to let our country die, are we. We are not going to let it culturally die and wither on the vine," he said.

"We have to do something about it. We’re not going to sit here and let people take everything away from us.”

On taking on the role of Aneurin - or Nye - Bevan, Sheen said he felt an "emotional and passionate connection" to the Tredegar politician, but said it was also "a lot to live up to".

The play was written by Welsh playwright Time Price and is a co-production between Wales Millennium Theatre and the National Theatre in London, where it premiered in April - it will play in Cardiff from 18 May to 1 June.

It tells the story of Nye in a series of flashbacks as a morphine-induced Bevan lies in a hospital bed battling terminal stomach cancer in 1960.

Sheen said it is now time for Wales to tell its own stories - despite the squeeze on public funding.

"Walking in here yesterday, walking onto the stage I got a real excitement about the potential for this space, for plays telling Welsh stories, the story of Wales," he said.

"No one else is doing it. Where is the great play about the Chartists, the Miner’s Strike, our cultural life and history?

"We have to make sure our voices are heard. Even if the opportunities for those voices to be heard are being shut down, then we have to shout louder don't we."

The Welsh government said: “Wales’ culture, art and sports institutions are an integral part of our society and well-being, enriching our communities and inspiring future generations.

"We have acted to mitigate the full scale of the budget pressures on these sectors.

"However, we have been clear our budget is up to £700m less in real terms than when it was set in 2021.

"We have had to take extremely difficult decisions to focus funding on core public services, including the NHS.

"Based on [the UK government's] plans our budget will be lower per person in real terms in 2028/29 than it was in 2022/23.”

#Michael Sheen #Interview #Wales #Nye #NHS

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mrchiipchrome · 2 years ago

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The Olive Theory

W.C.- 2,5 k

Frida Leonhardsen Maanum. That’s the name of the person you love the most in this universe, and your teammate at Arsenal. The two of you had met at a very unclear point in your lives, as two teenagers going through the hardships of feeling misunderstood you found your clarity in each other.

You two completed each other in a way people never understood and that’s what made you two so perfect for eachother. You didn’t have the need for people to understand what made your relationship work, because it just did. You were like night and day, sun and moon, good and bad, push and pull, love and hate, for and against. It was inexplicable, but that’s what makes it so much more fun.

You had met this ray of sunshine when you were 14 years old, it was at an U17 friendly against Norway and she had caught your eye as soon as she shot you one of her signature shining smiles. Your older national teammates shot you knowing looks as you sent one back, though this was an unusual sight for them only having seen it a handful of times.

They often joked that your face didn’t encompass the muscles needed for smiling as you always sat there stone faced. This would later be proven untrue when they saw you engaging with the ‘enemy’, who never failed to exercise the 43 muscles that make you smile.

They could always notice when you were thinking about the Norwegian, as the corners of your mouth were upturned more than usual while Frida’s teammates knew through the dreamy and unaware look that appeared in her eyes the second thoughts of your stone cold expression crossed her mind.

After two long years of pining after the other, the two of you finally fessed up after a hard fought draw between the U19 squads of Sweden and Norway. The both of you were now 16 and pursuing a long distance relationship, with you living in your native Sweden and her in Norway. But no matter where you lived you both knew that home wasn’t a place rather a person, your other half.

You were the first person she called when she got called up to the senior team at the age of 17, and she was the first person you called when you got the same news a week later. No one cheered louder than you when she entered the pitch in her debut match against the hosts Netherlands, and her shouts of delight as you scored the goal that sent your team to the quarter finals where you sadly lost bounced around the hotel room she was in and out into the corridors.

You were over the moon when it was announced that Frida would join you at Lindköpings FC, and the two of you moved into a small one bedroom apartment 5 minutes from the training grounds. Your club teammates finally got to witness the loved up version they had heard so much about from your national teammates, so much that they thought it was a fable as they never got to see you without the hard frown situated on your face.

They saw how utterly complete your soul was when you were with her, how in a strange way her optimistic and delightful personality made your ruthless and hard one full. She was your soulmate and no one could argue anything else, though they were slightly jealous at how you had found your person at such a young age.

When the two of you got a call from your shared agent at the beginning of summer 2021 telling you that you had offers from Arsenal in the WSL, the two of you didn’t hesitate and you began looking for apartments near the London Colney. You bid your longtime teammates goodbye before starting the new chapter in your life.

Now after nearly 2 years at Arsenal, you can proudly say that you hadn’t regretted your decision to move to England. People would think that after 8 years together you would fall out of love but that’s the opposite of what happened, the two of you only falling deeper in love with every second that passes. Everyone around you saw it, how you pulled her back to the ground when her head was too far up in the clouds and how only she could calm you down in your many moments of incredible rage on the pitch.

They could see it in your interactions with each other, how your eyes would follow her every move before she was close enough for you to grab her and pull her onto your lap and how she would look at you with eyes full of adoration whenever you brutally tackle someone on the field. It could be seen in your instagram bio spelling out ‘God is a woman, and her name is Frida Maanum’, while hers was the date when you had confessed to your obvious feelings. The two of you even shared a ‘son’ together, a border collie named Rutger ‘Gus’ Maanum-L/n who you posted about all the time.

And yet the thing people (your teammates) obsessed over most in your relationship was olives, surprisingly. You utterly ‘despised’ olives, but she loved them. ‘The olive theory’ they call it, having explained it every time they saw you give the olives found in your salad to her. They talk about it like it’s the rule that makes every relationship work, not that you believe them in the slightest.

Like everything else regarding your relationship, it was perfectly balanced. She dislikes raisins, while you basically inhale them. You despise the bitter taste of morning coffee, but as she sits curled up on the couch with a steaming cup of joe every morning you find yourself not wanting to gag as the stark smell of coffee invades your every sense. You perfectly balanced out each other, that’s what made your relationship so great, or so you’ve been told by your overenthusiastically curious teammates.

—

Sitting in your cubicle in the locker room at the Colney, the voices of your loud teammates surrounding your every move. Suddenly, the room goes quiet and you get tunnel vision when your eyes lay upon your ethereal girlfriend. Even with flyaways appearing from her ponytail and a thin layer of sweat covering her face, your girlfriend's beauty could still rival that of Aphrodite.

Feeling eyes on her, Frida turns her gaze upon the usual culprit and she finds herself staring directly into your eyes. She brings her hand up and into a wave directed at you, a wave you replicate before your line of sight is invaded by the aggressive movement of an arm not connected to your girlfriend's body.

Your gaze changes from love filled to murderous in the span of a millisecond, turning towards the body in which the arm is connected to and seeing Jen Beattie and Katie McCabe. Raising an eyebrow in an unamused expression you see how their larger than life smiles falter slightly before continuing with whatever they were supposed to say.

“We lost you there for a sec, don’t forget that we’re having dinner tonight at that new restaurant.” Jen says after a second of silence.

You stand up, picking your kitbag off the floor before nodding in agreement. You muster up the meanest expression possible before telling them that you would not hesitate to contact their girlfriends if they ever did that again.

Walking over to Frida who had finished her shower and had changed into her everyday clothes, you take her bag from her grasp and sling it over your shoulder while slipping your large hand into hers. You lead her out of the room while she bids everyone a quick goodbye and see you later. As soon as you reach your car and you settle behind the wheel she pulls you in for a sweet kiss by the sides of your unzipped hoodie.

Returning home, you lay down on the couch being exhausted from training and as Frida lays down on top of you with her head perched on your chest right above the placement of your heart, you realize that you’ve reached peak euphoria. If something were to happen to you, you realize that you’d be happy with everything you’ve achieved up to this point in your life and that you would take your last breath feeling complete and happy with the life well spent.

You relax into the couch and the added weight of your girlfriend makes it much easier for your eyes to fall closed. Speaking up you ask her;

“Raring, could you-”

“I put an alarm on as soon as we walked in the door”

The sweetest of smiles takes over the usual barrenness of your face and you press a kiss to the crown of her head before resting your head back on the couch without a care in the world.

The loud chirping of the alarm ringing for the ninth time has you finally opening your eyes. Frida has now cuddled into your side and you have an arm slung around her shoulders, her eyes closed and her breaths coming out in regular puffs. The sight has you enchanted and you forget about the alarm for a moment, before it brings you back to reality with rude beeps and you turn towards it with a sleepy kind of charm. You fully intend on snoozing it, but as you see the time displayed at the top of the screen you realize that you’d slept through the alarm more than once.

The harsh movement of you sitting up has Frida waking from her seemingly deep sleep, a confused frown on her face as you rush around the living room with your shirt pulled halfway from your torso and pants halfway down your thighs.

“Min kjæreste, what are you doing?” Turning around, you tell her your reasoning for your rush.

“Älskling we have 20 minutes left until we’re supposed to be at dinner with the girls, that's how long the drive there is.”

You watch as her eyes widen in realization and she scrambles up from her place on the couch like you had just moments before, you both thankful for your thinking in advance as you already had matching outfits prepared. You throw on the muted green trousers on before moving onto the off white button up, leaving the top buttons unbuttoned and putting on the matching green blazer. Turning towards your girlfriend once again, you take in the sight of her standing in a light green sundress that just about reaches down to the bottom of her knees.

You’re frozen in the moment, just staring at her with your jaw fully slack and hanging open slightly. When she sees your expression in the mirror as she’s finishing the last touches to her hair she giggles softly to herself before strutting over to you and pushing your jaw up with her index finger.

“Come on kjæreste, we have to go” You follow her out of your house akin to a lost puppy would its owner. You put the key in the ignition and start driving towards the restaurant on the outskirts of the town. You see her going into her makeup bag out of the corner of your eye and you make a face of disagreement.

“You don’t need any makeup, hjärtat.”

“I’m just putting on some mascara my love”

You nod before turning your attention back onto the road fully. You pull into the parking lot and you put the car in an open parking space before you turn off the engine and get out of the car. Rounding the car you pull on the door handle as you open the car door for her, holding out your hand she puts her own in yours as you assist her out of the car.

You enter the restaurant hand in hand with your girlfriend hearing the whistles and suggestive comments coming from the team at the time when you arrived, being fashionably late. Separating, you sit on opposite sides of the tables but still parallel to each other. You start to engage in conversation with your teammates sitting to the side of you after having ordered your food. As it arrives you notice the olives apparent in the dish and you’re too focused on picking them out of your food to give to your girlfriend to realize Jen pulling up her phone sneakily and filming you as you give them to her.

You eat with your teammates and talk to them simultaneously which means that you are more distracted than usual. You don’t realize that you missed an olive when you had given them all to your girlfriend, but Katie does. She’s just about to warn you but you manage to stuff it into your mouth before she could. Katie watches on, waiting for the visceral reaction but it never comes. She leans in to whisper softly in your ear.

“I thought you hated olives.”

You turn your face towards her with a questioning look on your face before she gestures towards your fork and you realize your mistake. Your face feels warm as you stare back at her and you start to explain in a hushed whisper so that the girl opposite you can’t hear a word of what you say to the Irish woman.

“I don’t hate olives, I never have. I actually love them, but I love her more. Love is all about sacrifices, and this is an easy sacrifice to make for her.”

Finishing your dinner you stay and mingle for a while before you meet your girlfriend's eyes and

you see the prominent exhaustion in them. Slapping your thighs, you stand up and catch the attention of the team and you tell them it’s time for you and Frida to return to your homestead. A few of them let out protests but you don’t listen to them, instead taking her hand and walking out to the car and beginning to drive home.

As soon as you return home you notice the incoming flood of notifications from TikTok, most of them tagging you. Taking a seat at the table, under the overhead lamp you pull her to sit on your lap as you press the notification of the video you’ve been tagged in hundreds of times, wanting to watch the video with her. Both your and Fridas eyes are fixated on the screen as you see a video of you giving your olives to her during your rendezvous at the restaurant, it being posted on Jen’s account. Pressing play you are met with soft plucking of a guitar and Ted Mosbys voice flooding out the speaker,

“The olive theory is based on my friends, Marshall and Lily-”

Got an idea, here you go!

#woso x reader #woso imagines #frida maanum #frida maanum x reader #awfc x reader

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holylottie · 10 months ago

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aching bones, aching teeth

masterlist [and warnings!]

PAIRING — Lottie Matthews x afab!reader

CHAPTER SINOPSIS — It's 2021, you try to take a grip of your life just like Lottie the past has taken a grip on your heart.

NOTE — english is not my first language, I apologize for any mistakes you might find. Please go read the tw's first! Thank you for reading :)

Chapter 01 — no spotlight shine as bright as her

2021

1, 2, 3, 4…

Your feet were aching.

You looked at yourself in the mirror, seeing you in a pretty leotard and flowy skirt, your ballet shoes leaking blood, staining your white tights like a sinner walking into heaven.

You were completely focused on the dance, watching every step with so much care that it was almost driving you into madness. You didn’t even blink, and your eyes were already swollen because of the lack of lubrication.

The song was fast, making you spin and spin around, dizzy and almost fainting, but that’s just how you always lived? on almost’s.

Your concentration couldn’t even be broken by the creatures showing up in the mirror. It was almost a copy of yourself, but with no face, a hair so long you couldn't see the end of it and always, always walking slowly, yet screaming louder and louder as she got farther and farther.

The lamuring lady — as you had used to call her (maybe thinking that naming something would give you power over it) — would drop thousands of teeth every time she opened her mouth to scream.

You got used to the sound, to her terrifying looks and behavior, however you could never look directly into her eyes.

They were the same as Lottie’s — and it was long ago since you've seen it.

As you expected it (but hoped it didn’t) everything changed after the rescue. Weirdly enough, you've felt more lost on your way back home than in the woods.

You never used the money. Perhaps it was a way to ensure a good future for yourself, to always have a big amount for emergencies or, perhaps, it was your way of hanging onto a piece of the past, of having a part of it to hold onto. Your fingernails were always bloody from the amount of strength you had to make to hold onto what you liked — so was your tongue, from how much you bit it.

5,6,7,8…

Your leg goes high, your bloody foot very close to your face, then you lower it, jumping in elegant hops around the rehearsal room.

You go to the left, count to three, to the other side, count to three, but when you put your leg to the side and spin, you count to two.

Once you finish it, breathing heavily, panting with your hip injury aching, you make the mistake of looking at the mirror.

Her eyes, Lottie's eyes, burn your skin and you discover a fifth heel —the one where you cannot look at those orbs eternally, the one you live.

You hated to be alone at your house.

There wasn't much to it, it wasn't lavish or too eccentric, it was just filled with paint brushes, partitures and broken ballerina shoes on the floor, it was like entering an artist’s mind: I made this and it feels, i made this and I have to bare the anger and godhood of creation.

You always thought you were over it, that you were truly healing — until you stared at your paintings and your dance routine and you realized every movement you make, either with your foot or brush, was following the same pattern, the same symbol.

You look at your reflection in the mirror and wonder if being perceived by others is less terrifying than being known as one's own. You wish you could take a vacation from your body and mind as you turn the tv on and scroll the channels, looking for something to make you forget your problems for a bit.

Except it only worsens the problem once you see Taissa on the tv.

You stare at the commercial immobilized, like you were just put on hold.

You feel anger, a deep rotten eager to scream at her.

But again, who were you to complain about Taissa on the tv? You were at the stage almost every week, you relished on the importance of the spotlight’s —relished on having the attention, but not being truly seen.

You were nothing but your art, perhaps Tai was the same: nothing but her morals. You would not take that away from her, you had a piece of you stolen once. You wouldn't be the one holding the knife.

When you are on the stage, you don’t feel anything but pure bliss.

To be seen by so many people in awe was almost as good as being looked at by Lottie, you loved it, to remember the sensation of having the sun itself perceiving you — shining just for you.

You loved all kinds of arts, even if you had a degree in biology. You liked to know how the brain feels, not how it works. Besides, Lottie always enjoyed more art than science.

In small moments, where you weren't the center of attention, you would steal glances of the public — you would pretend she was there, cheering you up, calling your name, simply looking at you with that smile of hers.

You would pretend you haven’t lost it all when they found you.

Too many thoughts would come to your mind when you were on stage. Today, you were thinking about your blood donations from yesterday, you thought that when being cut with the needle and given to another, the receiving end would feel this new blood boiling with the aching, with the need of being seen.

Will your blood carry your love for Lottie?

Will they bite their own hands and suck every drop of it in hopes of getting out this thirst for an unknown woman?

Your soul ached for hers like an earthquake.

Your eyes tear a bit, would God forgive you for your sins?

You shake your head while spinning, God’s forgiveness didn’t mattered — only her, only her mattered.

You heard a new voice once you reached the backstage.

— I’m Jessica Roberts, from Star Ledger, you know?

She got her hand out to you, her eyebrows getting higher. You take her hand. She had a tight grip but soft fingers, not really the type of finger that types so much like she claims she does.

— Not really if I’m being honest.

— Well, we work with stories.

Oh, you see where this is going to go.

— I appreciate your presence, but no. — you needed to get her out of here, so you walked to the door, opening it.

She takes a deep breath, already tired, and you can imagine you're not the first she had seen today.

— Don’t you wish to take it all out? Once it’s gone, no one will ever bother you anymore.

Or they will bother you more, you think.

— I understand your need for truth, but I don’t want that, I want to just bleed —I’m tired of making red paint out of my wounds.

Jessica looks at you puzzled, but she nods and gets out silently. You knew she would come back.

— But hm, thank you for the flowers!

— What flowers? — she frowns and so do you.

You hide it quickly with a smile.

— Nothing, don't worry, have a nice night!

Once she gets away, you turn around, if those flowers weren’t hers then who sent you? You didn’t have those types of friends and distanced yourself from all your family.

You get close to the pretty bouquet, taking it onto your hand and opening the letter.

Inside of it there was a postcard.

A postcard with the symbol on it.

#itmighthavebeenlibrary #lottie matthews #lottie matthews x reader #yellowjackets #yellowjackets x reader #yellowjackets x you #lottie matthews x you #Cannibalism like literally and as an all consuming love #autistic Lottie Matthews #reader insert #aching bones aching teeth

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yanderepuck · 1 year ago

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Kinktober Day 17

WELCOME BACK SLUTS. It's that time of the year you've been looking forward to. As always, Kinktober is hosted by your local Napoleon simp @xxsycamore

If you would like to read Kinktober 2021 and 2022 they are here

Remember to reblog and tell me what you thought about it

Day 17 - One night stand | FWB

You aren't staying here past a month. No way. You need to get back home and get back to your daily life. However. It wouldn't be the worst idea to have some fun along the way.

What was meant to be a one night thing turned into two nights. Then four nights. And what are you on now? Seven? Yikes. Just don't gain feelings that's all you tell yourself.

And you haven't. You like Comte as a person. As a friend. Nothing more than that. But it started one night when the two of you were drinking together. You were clearly having too much, while his tolerance is much higher, but he was still feeling buzzed. And next thing you know it's morning and you're naked in his bed.

Dumb decision? Maybe. But you went back for more.

That night you went into Comte's office and within moments you were sitting on his desk with him between your legs, kissing roughly.

Anything that was on his desk got pushed aside or fell to the floor. You pull in his tie and get it off of him so you can start getting his clothes off.

He hikes your skirt up, immediately moving your panties out of the way to finger you. You moan as his fingers thrust in and out of you

"You have been thinking about this all day, haven't you?" Comte smirks and has you lay back on his desk.

His vest drops to the floor and his shirt hangs open. You unbutton your own shirt. You want him to grab you. You want to be squeezed until you are bruised.

"Ungh .. just fuck me," you moan and wrap a leg around him to keep him close.

With your leg wrapped around him, he can't take your panties off, so he grabs them and rips the fabric to pull them off of you.

That felt intimidating and so hot at the same time.

He got his cock out of his pants and pulled your body closer to the edge. By doing so his cock slid into you and he pushed himself the rest of the way in.

You moan and grip into the sides of his desk as he begins to thrust into you.

He pushes your shirt open more and runs his hand asking your skin. Without slowing down he tries reaching behind you to get your bra off.

Once it's unhooked he pushes his hands under it to grope you, squeezing your breasts.

Your moaning gets louder and you hold onto the desk tighter.

A few more things fall off his desk, he's going to have a bit of a mess to clean up after.

"Ungh...fuck!" You arch your back and hold onto him tighter with your leg.

He grabs your leg and pulls it off from his waist up to his shoulder.

Sometimes you forget this man is a pureblood vampire. He could snap you in half if he wanted to, and something about him made him so much hotter.

With your leg now lifted, he's able to get deeper in you.

"You feel so good, ma Cherie," his voice is like a song. He talks so smoothly that hearing his voice gets you to moan. "I really hope no one else in this mansion is seeing you like this," he kisses your ankle and thrusts in harder.

You yell out and your toes curl.

"I wish I could mark you," he runs his tongue along where he kissed. You two may not be exclusive but he sure is possessive over you.

Your moans get louder and you bite your lip. You still don't want anyone else hearing you.

"At least we get to have fun before you go back home."

#ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp comte #kinktober

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black-arcana · 9 days ago

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SPIRITBOX Announces New Album 'Tsunami Sea'

Two-time Grammy-nominated progressive heavy metal band SPIRITBOX is gearing up for its next chapter with the announcement of its sophomore album, "Tsunami Sea", set for release on March 7, 2025 via Pale Chord in partnership with Rise Records. The album was produced by Dan Braunstein and Mike Stringer, mixed by Zakk Cervini and mastered by Ted Jensen. In tandem with the news, the band has dropped their latest single, "Perfect Soul", alongside another one of their signature visually captivating music videos shot and directed by Dylan Hryciuk at Versa Films.

"Perfect Soul" offers a glimpse into the album's melodic sound, balancing riffs and groove with ethereal atmospheres to create a listening experience that pulls listeners in like an incoming tide. The track's haunting video, set in an abandoned oceanside hospital, follows an angelic Courtney LaPlante as she searches the afterlife, surrounded by ghostly figures and a grotesque, barnacle-covered creature. Interwoven with scenes of the band performing in decaying rooms, the visuals capture the song's dark, poetic essence, drawing viewers further into SPIRITBOX's evolving world.

The new single follows the band's initial release from the album, "Soft Spine", which received praise for its crushing intensity. Alt Press called it "relentlessly heavy," and Revolver described it as "a hella-bruising bangabout." These two releases demonstrate the band's commitment to pushing their sound in new directions while staying anchored to their metal roots.

SPIRITBOX has capped off a landmark year with their second Grammy nomination for "Best Metal Performance" for the 2025 awards, this time for their powerhouse track "Cellar Door", cementing their status as a driving force in modern metal. Adding to this momentum, in October SPIRITBOX reunited with hip-hop icon Megan Thee Stallion for her "Megan: Act II" deluxe album, adding their distinct edge to the song "Tyg".

Their ability to transcend genres has only amplified their reach, marking major milestones along the way. Joining KORN on their 30th-anniversary tour, SPIRITBOX hit a career high, bringing their explosive live show to packed arenas across the world. During the tour, they took the stage at Louder Than Life festival, where buzzworthy guest appearances from Poppy, Tati Shmayluk of JINJER, and Sam Carter of ARCHITECTS amplified an already unforgettable set.

As 2024 winds down, SPIRITBOX will join BRING ME THE HORIZON for stadium shows in Brazil and Mexico City, before embarking on their European headline tour in 2025. They've also been announced as support for LINKIN PARK's awaited world tour, joining them for performances in Italy, Netherlands and the U.K. With high-impact live shows and an ambitious new project on the horizon, the next chapter for SPIRITBOX promises to be their most thrilling yet.

"Tsunami Sea" track listing:

01. Fata Morgana 02. Black Rainbow 03. Perfect Soul 04. Keep Sweet 05. Soft Spine 06. Tsunami Sea 07. A Haven With Two Faces 08. No Loss, No Love 09. Crystal Roses 10. Ride The Wave 11. Deep End

For many artists, a meteoric rise can often mean a sudden plateau. However, for Grammy-nominated progressive heavy metal mainstays SPIRITBOX, there appears to be no end in sight on their near-constant ascent to the top. Formed in 2017 in the picturesque-yet-isolated region of Victoria, British Columbia, Canada, by vocalist Courtney Laplante and guitarist Mike Stringer, SPIRITBOX would fully cement themselves as a household name in the summer of 2020 with the release of their blistering breakout single "Holy Roller", along with a host of other captivating singles shortly after, resulting in a media firestorm of hype.

With new and existing fans eagerly watching their next move, SPIRITBOX exceeded every expectation imaginable in 2021 with the release of their genre-defining debut studio album "Eternal Blue" via Pale Chord/Rise Records. "Eternal Blue", which debuted at No. 13 on the Billboard 200, kicked open the doors of the heavy metal scene and rewrote the genre's playbook with 12 stunning tracks that incorporated everything from djent and post-metal to infectious synth-laden pop sensibilities and cinematic arrangements, brought fully to life by the inimitable Laplante's ethereal and commanding vocal performances.

The album cycle for "Eternal Blue" saw SPIRITBOX not only grace the covers of esteemed music publications such as Revolver, Alternative Press, Rock Sound and Kerrang!, among many others but would also solidify the band as one of the most in-demand groups in live music today with their one-hundred percent sold out, first-ever headlining tour in support of the album which saw ticket sales over 40,000. The band would also share the stage with seasoned metal veterans such as LIMP BIZKIT and GHOST and win "Best International Breakthrough Band" at the 2021 Heavy Music Awards.

In 2022, SPIRITBOX secured highly-coveted spots at numerous major U.S. rock and metal festivals and were nominated for two Juno awards, respectively. SPIRITBOX would also round out their current lineup with the inclusion of drummer Zev Rose and bassist Josh Gilbert in addition to releasing their sonically experimental EP "Rotoscope" in June of that year as well as a cross-genre collaboration with dubstep artist Illenium for the track "Shivering".

During another whirlwind year for the band, including a U.S. tour with SHINEDOWN and PAPA ROACH, SPIRITBOX wrote and recorded their critically acclaimed EP "The Fear Of Fear", released in November 2023. The EP features the single "Jaded", which was nominated for "Best Metal Performance" at the 66th annual Grammy Awards. In the same month, the band would make another genre-bending splash with a high-profile collaboration with rapper Megan Thee Stallion for a remix of her song "Cobra".

Photo credit: Jonathan Weiner

#spiritbox #tsunami sea #news

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elixrr · 2 years ago

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Simpy Xiao One-Shot

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Semi-ooc Xiao x GN!Reader

Synopsis... Xiao confesses his love to you. A brainrot that's been rotting my brain, but it's just Xiao trying his best with you to confess, but fails and succeeds in the same time.

Author's note... Xiao has been occupying my brain since 2021. This is not okay, but I'm not complaining bc I love Xiao from the bottom of my idiot heart <3

Warnings... None, really. Just tooth-rotting fluff from stupidly cute brainrots I've had of him (mwahahahahhaa) oh, but also angst if you squint just hard enough that your eyes are quite literally closed. Oh, and a mini argument :')

“Xiao,” he heard you. He heard you— your voice, it rings within his head, from side to side to kiss on both his ears. Your voice was always meaningful to him. He could almost get lost in it, the way the syllables would be spelled out so greatly from you like a—

“Xiao?” You spoke once more, louder and clearer than before. Ah. He got lost in the thought of you again. Swiftly, with a flashy smoke of teal and black, he arrived right by your side, where he wanted to stay.

“You called?” Despite his words, he already knew why you called. It's always for the same reasons. To spend time with him. To do things with him. To be with him.

“Of course I did. What days do I not?”

Xiao tried to recount the days in which you've never even uttered his name. How many years ago was that? It's almost astounding how many years you've been friends with him at this point.

But it's almost as astonishing that he hasn't even confessed his love for you yet.

But never mind that, Xiao cleared his hazy mind full of fond memories with you, who replaces every other memory of his karmic debt, the agonizing presence of death that continues to pry at his sanity each passing day.

But you replenish all of that. His lost dreams, his lost hopes, and his lost world. You returned all of that to him, replenished and renewed. You, it's always you. You, who—

“Xiao, is something the matter?” You tangled his hair around your finger. The closeness had his face flushed with the pink of a peony. “You've been quite out of it lately.”

“I– I'm..?” Fine. Fine is what he wanted to say. But the words died down in his throat. All he could focus on was your features up close. You've been his friend for so long, but it's rare for you to get close to him, let alone come into contact with him. He's nervous, not just because physical contact with him is outright dangerous, but because you're just– just to close to him, and you don't even pay an ounce of attention to that. You're toying with his hair so naturally, as if it's nothing special, like it's nothing out of the ordinary— like you two were dating.

Oh, what a fantasy that would be. Xiao's hand intertwined with yours, laying in a field of grass and blooming flowers, you blabbering on about anything and everything, just like you always do. But this time, maybe you'd hug him. Run a finger or a few through his hair. Maybe you'd even kiss him. Or even do that thing that humans would do on the occasion out in the open, that thing called “cuddling”. Xiao blushes at the thought. You're already so close to him, but if you were even closer, arms wrapped around him, snuggled oh-so close? He could hardly take the thought without feeling weak to the knees.

“You're...? Okay, so, you're clearly not fine, if you were going to say that. So, here. Sit down with me, you can tell me what's happening in that restless life you've got there.” You, with a soft and low voice, whispered into his ear.

“O– Okay.” Xiao sat himself down right next to you, albeit a little closer than he intended, but still close nonetheless. Damnit, he hopes deep down and past his adeptal bones that you don't suspect a thing about him liking you.

“Alright, so something is up. If you're comfortable, you can tell me. I'm all ears.”

“Your invitation is tempting,” Xiao weens with an internal scoff, all while slipping his gaze elsewhere. “But I can't tell you anything.”

“You shouldn't need to know that I...” Ah. He let that part slip out. Albeit in a blushful whisper, but he could only pray to Rex Lapis that you didn't actually hear that.

Oh, but of course you did.

“Well, we've been friends for, like, forever! Or, uh, my forever, but you get the gist of it. Xiao, if something's wrong, you know you could tell me, I—”

“BUT WHAT IF I JUST CAN'T TELL YOU?!”

Xiao bellowed at you, having you flinch at the sudden response. That was unintentional, as told by the way he covered his mouth with his hand and the way his golden wide eyes would stare at you, heavy with guilt.

“Oh. Well, if you can't tell me, then I shouldn't pry on it. Sorry about that.”

“I– no, I should apologize. I didn't... mean to..”

Woah, wait. What's going on?

Xiao got quiet. The words, once more, were killed down his throat. He needed to get out of there quickly. But he couldn't teleport— he couldn't think of where to go at that moment, he envisioned a scornful look on your face when you stared at him. Do you hate him now? Will you suddenly give up on him? He just can't accept that, not after he found out that he was in love. He can't go back now, he realizes. He can't be used to the cold loneliness anymore, you've become a part of his life, a major part, he can't let go now! Why, oh why?! Why did he–

“Hey. Shh. Xiao, hey. I'm not mad, I'm not upset.”

Xiao opened his eyes. Everything was glassy and blurred. He rubbed his eyes— tears stained his gloves. Was he crying? In front of you? He tried to turn away, but then he felt your arms wrap around him delicately, like he was as fragile as glass. How could he escape now? You enveloped him in your arms, and he knows it's obvious that he's calmed down after that.

“Please... Don't go. Don't leave yet, I— I love you too much to let you go.”

He didn't mean for that last part to slip out, but even so, he nearly fell unconscious under your arms, feeling them squeeze around him as he confessed. Still. Of all times, why now? Why, when he's most vulnerable in your arms?

“It's okay, it's okay. You know, I love you too. I always have, but I never guessed those feelings were returned.” You took his hand in yours and smiled, looking into his soft, loving, yet teary eyes.

“Of course they were returned. I loved you for so long, I... didn't even know it.” Xiao's eyes stared back into yours, your tender eyes full of honesty. His hand squeezing yours slightly, a gesture to show that all his words were true. He watched your other hand wipe his remaining tears away, and he smiled.

Xiao smiled for you.

“Then... May I?” Xiao's face flushed a bright rosey red, seeing you inch closer and closer to him, filling in the gap of air that lay between you two.

Xiao stuttered, his heart screamed yes, but his head was going into overdrive and he didn't know what to say. Even if he did, there's no way he could form a sentence now.

But you waited. Your lips, slightly parted, were only centimeters from his own, awaiting his consent.

“P– please. Do so.”

And you crashed your lips into his, and as if roses bloomed beneath you both in place of the Inn's roof, he was dropped into eternal bliss.

Likes, reblogs, and shares are appreciated! <3

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bbgem329 · 1 year ago

Text

Things Are Never As They Seem—Chapter Twenty One

Pairings—Sebastian Stan x F!Reader, Sebastian Stan x OFC (PR relationship)

Summary

You and Sebastian Stan have been dating privately for over two years. Everything is perfect until he is coerced into a PR relationship when he signed with a new agency to advance his career. Trouble ensues…

Warnings

MINORS DNI! 18++. Language. Angst. Fluff. Hollywood sucks ass. Mentions of overdose and drug abuse. Daddy issues. Seb is the best bf ever. Implied smut.

Series Masterlist

—————

April 10, 2021

“How are you feeling, sweetheart?”

You lazily rolled your head to the side, following the sound of his voice. Your eyes struggled to adjust to the light as you squinted up at him with a dopey grin, “S’ good.”

Sebastian chuckled, “Yeah?”

You shivered at the feeling of his hand trailing gently up and down your spine, exhaling a content sigh, “I am jelly.”

And that was the only thing you could come up with at the moment. Your mind was completely empty and your body completely lax. All morning your boyfriend had had you in this exact state, from the moment you opened your eyes to find his pretty face between your legs until now, you supposed.

He laughed again, leaning down to press a kiss to your bare shoulder, “Jelly, huh?”

You relaxed back, letting your eyes flutter shut as his nails continued to scratch along your back, “Mhmm.”

“I can tell.” There was a smirk evident in his voice, “I see that massage really got to you. I think you fell asleep not even ten minutes in.” He chuckled, “But hey, can’t say I blame you. Tina does wonders on my back too.”

“Tina is the GOAT.” You mumbled sleepily, “Can we keep her?”

“The GOAT?” He laughed, louder this time, “Nah, sweetheart. But you got me. I give pretty decent massages, don’t I? I’m a goat too, right?”

You lifted your head to look at him, shooting him your best you-better-be-joking glare while struggling to bite back a life.

He pressed a hand to his chest, looking more than a little offended, “Baby, you wound me.”

“I’m kidding.” You giggled, pulling yourself up to sit on the edge of the table, the blanket covering you falling to expose your bare body to the room. “You know I love your messages. You’re a GOAT too. And that means the greatest of all times and you are really, really great to me.”

“I know.” He smirked a little, drawing an oversized, fluffy white robe over your shoulders, “Now move your butt, honey. I have a bath waiting for you and Tina needs to pack up her stuff, she has another client an hour across town.”

“Wait.” You frowned, “You’re not getting one?”

His brows furrowed as he took a hold of your hands, helping you from the table, “Why would I?”

“I just thought…” He cut you off with a soft kiss, wrapping you up tightly in his arms.

“Today is about you.” His nose skimmed along your cheek as he lifted one hand to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear, “It’s your special day.”

“Will you at least join me in the bath?”

“No can do, baby.” He connected your lips for one more soft kiss before guiding you back in the direction of the master bathroom, “I have a lot to do and there are too many people coming in out of the house. I don’t want to leave anyone to their own devices.”

You could understand that. Anyone that was brought in, whether it be your home or publically at some restaurant or social outing, were usually pretty well vetted and always, always signed an NDA but it was still uncomfortable and there was always that what if–what if someone accidentally slipped up, what if someone had nothing to lose and didn’t care about the consequences of exposing you.

In the past, it wouldn’t have been the biggest deal if your relationship was exposed but now…

Now there was so much more on the line.

Your careers. Both of your reputations. Your lives.

You were pulled from your thoughts as a familiar older lady reentered the room, wearing a big smile, “How are you feeling, honey?”

You plastered on a matching smile, “I feel amazing, Tina. Thank you so much.”

“Of course,” She waved you off, looking a little bashful, “Happy birthday, darling girl. It was an absolute honor to do this for you.”

You blushed a little, tucking yourself shyly into Sebastian’s side. Sometimes you forgot you were a celebrity. It wasn’t like it was the first time someone had something like that to you and yet you didn’t think you would ever get used to it.

And if you were being honest, it made you uncomfortable.

It wasn’t as if you weren’t flattered. You were. Very much. You just didn’t see yourself as someone with that kind of status and you probably never would.

You weren’t the queen of England, you were just you.

“Thanks again, Tina.” Sebastian spoke up, giving you a comforting squeeze. There wasn’t a doubt he knew exactly what was going on in your head and you were beyond thankful he’d stepped in before things got too awkward. “If you give me one second to get her situated, I’ll help you carry your stuff out to your car.”

“Of course.” She shot you a smirk, wiggling her graying brows, “What a gentleman. You’re a lucky girl.”

You beamed up at your lover, burrowing your body closer to his just as he dipped down to press a kiss to your head, “I am so lucky. The luckiest woman alive.”

You shared one last smile and a little wave goodbye before Sebastian pulled you into the bathroom, closing and locking the door gently behind you. Your jaw practically hit the floor when you took in the space around you.

“Sebastian.” You breathed out, “You did all this?”

The room was mostly dark, the only light coming from the candles scattered around the counter and along the edge of the tub. There was soft, soothing music coming from a speaker and the bathtub was filled with steaming water and a mound of bubbles. It looked so inviting and smelled so good.

“Well, yeah.” He shrugged, like it was no big deal. He was trying to play it off but the blush on his cheeks told you otherwise. He pulled a hand out of his pocket, avoiding your eyes as he waved his hand towards the bath, “I put some epsom salt in the bath. I thought about adding lavender but that just might put you to sleep again. I want you to relax but not-”

You threw yourself into him, arms wrapped tightly over his shoulders and around his neck. “It’s perfect.” You smiled, pausing to press a quick kiss to his cheek. “Everything is perfect, Seb. You’re making this the best birthday ever.”

“Really?” He looked skeptical, “I know you said you wanted it to be just us but I wanted you to have the…” He waved a hand, “The full work up, ya know? I wanted you to be treated like a princess and waited hand-and-foot on today. I mean, ideally we would be on some tropical island—laying out on the beach and drinking margaritas or something. Maybe we can do that next year-”

“We definitely can.” You took his face in your hands, drawing his lips to yours for a soft, drawn out kiss, “Sebastian, this is perfect. I mean it. We could be anywhere in the world, doing anything or nothing, and I would still think it's the best birthday ever as long as I was with you.”

There was a second of silence, eyes searching one anothers before you both burst into a fit of giggles.

“I think that was the cheesiest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

You nodded, cheeks flaming, “It definitely was.”

“You’re so cute.” He smiled, scrunching his nose at you in your favorite way, “And so sweet.” He pecked your lips one last time before giving your butt a tap, “Now get that cute ass in the tub before it gets cold. I need to go help Tina.”

You playfully rolled your eyes at him, failing to suppress your smile as you did as you were told. You made a little show of stripping yourself of your robe before tossing it at him, watching with glee as his hungry eyes trailed your body, his tongue darting out to wet his lips.

“Are you sure you don’t want to join me?” You gave your hips an enticing wiggle, eyes hooded as you glanced over your shoulder at him.

“I would if i could, baby.” He approached you then, his eyes shamelessly wandering as he offered you a hand into the tub. “There will be plenty of alone time for us later to do whatever you please with me.”

You jutted your bottom lips out in an exaggerated pout, “Promise?”

“Promise.” He chuckled and with a gentle push on your shoulder, he guided you down into the sudsy hot water. “I’m gonna go help Tina and check in on a few things. I’ll be back in like ten but here is your phone,” He pulled your phone from his pocket, setting it on a towel beside the tub, “If you want to change the song or need something you can text me.”

You let out a content sigh as you sunk back against the back of the tub, submerging yourself deeper in the water, “Thank you so much.”

“Of course.” He blew you a little kiss and shot you one last boyish grin before slipping out of the bathroom, closing the door tightly behind him.

Your eyes fluttered shut, your body relaxing completely and your usually loud mind falling quiet for once.

It really was one of the best birthdays. Especially compared to last year when you were stuck in Seb’s apartment for lockdown. Even that hadn’t been all bad, at least you had been him then too.

No matter what he always managed to make you feel so special on occasions such as these.

Growing up you didn’t really have anyone that would go out of their way to be there in the way that he had for your birthday. You spent a lot of birthdays and holidays alone. More often than not, your very own father would forgot. All you yearned for as you got older was for someone to put the effort in that no one bothered to before—to heal and give that part of you, your inner child, a little extra love.

And Sebastian did that.

Without fail.

You didn’t even have to ask.

He enjoyed doing it just as much as you enjoyed receiving it.

You were ripped from your relaxed state when the music stopped abruptly, cut off by the incessant ringing of your phone. You were so annoyed by the interruption you didn’t even bother to look at the caller ID before bringing it to your ear with a breathless, “Hello?”

All you got was a croak of your name.

Your heart sank in your chest, eyes squeezing shut as you slumped back against the back of the rub.

The last person you expected to hear from anytime soon said your name again, “Are you there?”

“Sorry.” You cleared your throat, fingers pinching the bridge of your nose, “I’m here.”

“Happy birthday, baby girl.”

You rolled your eyes, biting down hard on your lip to suppress a scoff. The fucking audacity of this man. He overdoses, the hospital sends him to rehab, he sobers up for who knows how long this time, calls you because he feels kinda bad–begs for forgiveness, says he’s changed.

It was a repeating cycle.

Wash, rinse, and repeat.

It wouldn’t be too long now until he was back on the streets with something stronger than alcohol or weed running through his veins.

“You there, sweetpea?” His voice absolutely grated your nerves. Has it always been this annoying or were you finally done with this man’s shit? “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for a few days but that boyfriend of yours keeps intercepting my calls. I’m glad I could finally reach you.”

Sebastian had done that?

Now that you think about it, you really hadn’t been on your phone much for the last couple days. It was always set on silent, resting on the nightstand in your bedroom or in Sebastian’s pocket when you were out and about.

It’s definitely possible.

And why did that make your heart want to burst right out of your chest? Why did that have tears welling up in your eyes?

God, you hadn’t even realized. For the past, however many days, he’d been shielding you from your father—protecting your heart.

What the fuck did you deserve this man?

Your name was called again, tone growing more impatient this time. But before you could respond Sebastian appeared in the doorway, balancing a tray holding a plate of chocolate covered strawberries and a huge glass of what you assumed was some sort of smoothie. The smile on his face fell as soon as he saw your expression, eyes flashing to your phone.

“Yeah.”

“That boyfriend of yours sure can be an asshole.” He huffed a little, “I mean I’m glad he’s looking out for you and all but I’m your father! He has no say in who you're talking to, especially when it comes to me.”

“Oh,” You laughed dryly, eyes locked with your lovers as he set the tray on the bathroom counter, “You’re my father now?”

You watched as Sebastian’s entire body stiffened, expression turning to one of complete stone. The flip was instantaneous. You’d only seen him like this a few times throughout the years of knowing him. He had always been slow to anger but once he was there… lets just say you would absolutely hate to be the person on the receiving end of his temper.

“Don’t be like that sweetheart—”

Before you could even blink, your phone was snatched from between your fingers.

You watched with your heart in your throat as your lover brought the phone to his ear, “I thought I told you not to bother her anymore?”

His voice, all low and raspy, sent shivers racing up your spine and butterflies bursting through your belly. This shouldn’t turn you on like it did. The tick in his jaw, the flash of fury in his cerulean eyes, and the clench in his fist shouldn’t get you riled up and hot.

You couldn’t help though. He was standing up for you.

He was protecting you.

“No, you listen to me.” He hissed, steps heavy as he paced from one end of the bathroom to the next, “You’ve put her through enough. She’s given you chance after chance, supported you and encouraged you to get your fucking shit together. She’s spent thousands of dollars to get you the help you need and every single fucking time you turn around and stab her in the fucking back.”

Your jaw was practically on the floor. Sebastian had never spoken to someone like this–not that you'd witnessed anyways. You could hardly believe your ears or your eyes when he paused his listening to pass you the plate of strawberries and the smoothie with a bashful smile.

Who was this man?

You couldn’t help but giggle a little as you sank back in the water with your smoothie in one hand and a strawberry in the other to watch the free show you were getting.

“She will reach out to you when she wants to talk.” He scrubbed a hand down his face, expression hard again, “I sincerely hope you mean that but until we see some real proof—some real change. Don’t reach out.” He waved a hand around, gesturing aminantly, “Don’t call. Don’t text. Don’t try to find her, she’s moved since then. Don’t email. Nothing. If you’re serious about this. If you love her, you’ll do as I say and respect our wishes.”

And with that he hung up. A few taps to your screen and the music started back up, softer now.

“Baby.” He shook his head, steps hesitant as he approached the side of the tub, “I am so sorry. I know I shouldn’t have done that. I should’ve told you when he first called but I couldn’t stand it-,” He sat down on the edge of the tub and you set your drink aside so he could take your hands in his, “The idea of him hurting you. I knew he’d be calling any day now. I’ve been keeping track of where he was and he’s back at the rehab center… Which don’t even worry about anything to do with that, I have it covered—cost and all.” His shoulder slumped slightly as he released a heavy sigh, “I know I should’ve talked to you but you’re doing so good, you’re happy and content.” He shook his head, “I didn’t want him to stir up your life and cause you pain like he always does.”

“Sebastian.” You said softly, rising up on your knees to take his face between your hands. “Thank you so much.” You shook your head, a small smile tugging at the corner of your lips, “You have no idea how much that means to me. I had no idea.”

“You’re not mad?”

He looked so much like a kicked puppy at that moment–eyes all soft and big, plump lips pouted, you could hardly handle it.

“I’m not mad.” You lifted yourself higher out of the water, bearing more of your body to his eyes, “I’m the opposite of mad. And if you don’t get in here right this second and kiss me, I’m coming after you.”

Never have you seen a man undress so quick.

And by the time you got out the water was cold and you were once again jelly.

—————

“You can’t be serious.”

“I’m not kidding, baby.” Sebastian huffed, holding a piece a fabric at the ready, “Just fucking indulge me, jeez. Why the fuck are you so stubborn?”

“Me? Stubborn?” There was no holding back a laugh, “Never!”

“Yeah.” He shook his head, rolling his eyes, “Okay. And I was born on mars.”

“You know what, you fucking wish you were born on mars–”

“Oh my God.” He interjected, voice loud but humor evident in his tone. “Turn the fuck around and let me put this fucking blind fold on your goddamn eyes, woman.”

“Jeez.” You covered your mouth with your hand and snickered, “Grumpy.”

He huffed, gripping you gently by the shoulders and spinning you away from him. You didn’t have time to protest any further before the blindfold was yanked over your eyes and he took your hands in his, guiding you outside.

“See.” You could practically hear the smirk in his voice, “Was that so hard?”

“Fuck off.” You practically beamed and he laughed.

You let him lead you further into the backyard.

You had absolutely no day what he had planned, all you knew was he’d been working on whatever was back here on and off all day.

Today had been filled with nothing but surprises from the moment you woke up. Starting with breakfast in bed, followed by the in-home massage, pedicure, and facial, of course, the bath, and then a painting class he’d set up after a nice, light lunch. You did a puzzle together, did some karaoke on a machine he recently bought, and had a nice dinner from your favorite little family owned pizza shop a few blocks over with a few glasses of wine.

You hated everything to do with surprises unless it came from him. He knew you well enough to know what you would like. You trusted him more than you trusted yourself at times.

Everything was perfect.

He was perfect.

There was nothing that could ruin this day now.

“Okay.” Your lover spoke up, “You ready?”

You laughed, feeling a little giddy, “I was born ready, Stan!”

He didn’t respond but instead ripped the fabric from your head.

The moment your eyes adjusted, a gasp tumbled from your lips.

“Holy…” You turned to look at him, tears welling up in your eyes, “Sebastian.”

“Baby?” He reached for you and you let him take your hand, “Don’t cry.”

“What the-”

You took a step towards the canopy he’d set up around a big blow up mattress completely covered in a million different blankets and pillows. On each side of the bed was a little table filled with all different kinds of snacks, drinks, and candy. Positioned at the end of the bed was a huge projector screen with Netflix already pulled up.

“I can’t believe you.” For, what felt like the millionth time today, you turned and launched yourself into his embrace, “This is the best surprise ever.” You grabbed his face between your hands, layering kisses all over his face, “I’m so fucking happy. Thank you. Thank you.”

He laughed, all warm and light, hoisting you up by the back of your thighs before tossing you lightly on the mattress and crawling up over you. “Does that mean I did good?”

You wrapped yourself back around him, tugging him down by the collar of his t-shirt, “It means you did great.”

You dragged him down further, connecting your lips in a hot, needy kiss. He indulged you for a few minutes, lips pressing incessantly against yours, tongues tangling when you opened your mouth for him.

He pulled back with a frustrated groan. “Fuck.” His forehead dropped to yours, “I forgot the popcorn.”

“No.” You whined, making grabby hands as he moved off you, crawling towards the edge of the bed, “Don’t go!”

“I’ll be right back!” He chuckled, pulling himself up to stand, “You get comfy, pick out a movie, and I’ll turn out the back lights and grab the popcorn.” He glanced back over his shoulder at you, shooting you a wink, “I know how much you love it. It’s a must.”

You gave a little hmph as he left but did as told, sliding beneath the comforter after locating the remote and adjusting the many pillows and blankets to your liking. Once comfortable, you started working your way through the many selections Netflix had to offer, trying to find something good to watch.

You were stuck between a romcom or a scary movie so you decided to wait until Sebastian returned.

Minutes ticked by and he still had yet to return.

You gave it a few more minutes.

I mean, how long did it take to make popcorn?

Definitely not this long.

With a huff, you threw the covers off and slid out of the comfy bed and trekked back towards the house. You were going to chew his ass if he was farting around on his phone or something.

“Sebastian.” You practically stomped into the house, through the living room but came to an abrupt halt when you picked up the sound of voices near the front of the house. You took a detour, listening as the voices got louder and more heated with every step.

“You need to leave right fucking now.”

That was Sebastian’s voice. Your heart felt like it was seconds away from crawling up your throat as you finally stepped into the hallway, the doorway in sight.

“I mean it,” His voice was so cold and nasty, “You’re not welcome here tonight. You weren’t supposed to come for at least another week.”

“Plans change.”

Your heart changed directions, dropping to your ass as you took in the sight of a farmilar blonde standing on the front porch with her luggage at her feet.

“Sebastian.”

He spun around, expression softening as soon as he laid eyes on you. “Baby.”

“What are you doing here?” You looked past him, locking eyes with a pair of dark ones.

You didn’t like the look in her eye nor the sly smirk painted across her lips. She knew exactly what she was doing, she knew what today was.

“Coming to see my boyfriend.” She grinned, reaching out to trail her fingers down his arm, fortunately he immediately shrugged her off, “Of course.”

You were wrong.

There was something that could ruin this day.

And that something was Catalina.

You were officially in your own personal hell.

Happy fucking birthday to you, right?

—————

Taglist

@justlovelifeblog @inlovewith3 @buckybarnesandmarvel @sleutherclaw @snugglingbucky @perlaluna @littlewhiterose

@idontwannagomrstarkk @abihaaa14 @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer @sebsgirl71479 @getofffmydick @eccentricnos @barnesml @aira1995 @sweetwritingfanficfriend @dhoruwolfie

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan fanfic #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x female reader #sebastian stan x you

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