#Lila anon
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diana-berry · 1 month ago
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My favorite unspoken part of the miraculous fandom is that the Lila anon on ao3 terrorizes writers so much that there is literally a fucking tag with two pages worth of stories dedicated to telling her to fuck off
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lilaanonsupportgroup · 1 year ago
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Contributors Wanted
Hello friends and fans of Miraculous Ladybug. This blog has been set up to share the works of fan authors for ML who have been harassed by an anon on Ao3 masquerading as Lila.
I started this blog in 2020, when I was being harassed myself. From there, I've shared hundreds of stories, either those submitted, or ones I spotted myself.
We are ALWAYS taking submissions. We want you to get the positive feedback you deserve to drown out the harassment from the Lila Anon.
However, I, the creator of this blog, P-Artsypants, have not been reading much ML fanfic recently. That's where you come in. I'd like to give mod abilities over to other fans and readers that would be out reading fics anyway, who might be willing to share fics to this blog when they see the Lila Anon attacking them.
Please share this post, if you would be so kind.
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vipertext · 6 months ago
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Lila anon makes me want to cause a national tragedy
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howhow326 · 2 years ago
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Guy guys the Lila Anon messaged me!
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Am I popular yet?
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journal-of-jax · 10 months ago
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Y’all I won’t lie, I read a lot of Miraculous Ladybug fanfic. Which means that I am aware of the Lila anon role player, and honestly it’s so funny to me. Like this person’s goal is to just pretend to be one of the most disliked miraculous characters. Also they’re just so silly. “I would never be that stupid that Maribrat could never beat me” lol I’m tempted to write a miraculous fic to see if they’d show up. It be like a celebrity (derogatory) showed up
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plumsaffron · 1 year ago
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Out of curiosity, are you familiar the Lila anon on Archive of Our Own? If so, what are your thoughts on them? (The two of you seem like you have a lot in common and would get along really well.)
I'm not.
I'm neutral for now.
Though I wish they came on tumblr to entertain me.
I'm kind of bored these days currently
Also I want to see more of these toxic Lila Rossi fans that others be talking about that they max vote for on polls.
Just to see if they are for realsies or not.
Hopefully no antiplumsaffronsupportgroup emerges lol
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mariharem-trash-heap · 2 years ago
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Never thought I would say this, but I fucking hate the Lila anon.
This is twice, TWICE now that they’ve started commenting on unrelated fandoms as if it’s a Miraculous work.
I wish you could IP-block anons on AO3. This is so fucking stupid.
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miraculouslbcnreactions · 6 months ago
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Wait, I was reading your posts and came across something I've found confusing. How is Adrien asking Ladybug wth she is doing in Volpina a bad thing? From Adrien's perspective, Ladybug's a celebrity tracking down a middle schooler with zero clout and humiliating her for lying about meeting her before. That's, uh yeah? Imagine if that happened irl lmao. Millions of teenage girls would perish at 1D's hands. My middle school would be a horror story. And it's made clear multiple times in the episode that her motivation is jealousy. It's one of the few episodes where the lesson Marinette gets makes sense I think, because she was genuinely spiteful in shitting on this random girl in front of her crush. That's significantly different than Ladybug just asking for a retraction from the Ladyblog. It's also one of the few times when Adrien's celebrity background actually affects how he acts, and it makes sense that Marinette doesn't make the connection between superhero=celebrity=not allowed to scream at middleschoolers in public. If half the kids in her school didn't lie about meeting Ladybug before, my suspension of disbelief is gone.
I've seen this argument before and it makes no sense to me, especially in the context of the lie that Lila actually told and the way the Lila confrontation actually goes down. A lot of people who have this take seem to think that Lila's lie was, "Ladybug saved me," and that Ladybug made a big public confrontation which is not what canon actually gave us. The confrontation was done in a mostly private setting and, while we never see Lila's full Ladyblog interview, this is how Ladybug sums up the interview in Volpina:
Ladybug:(sarcastically) Well hey Lila! How's it going? Long time no see. I saw your interview on the Ladyblog, awesome job. Oh sure! I remember our instant connection when I saved your life and we've been really good friends ever since! Practically BFF's! Uh actually, when did I save your life again, Lila? I don't recall. Oh yes! Of course, now I remember. Never! And we're not friends either! Miss Show-Off here was trying to impress you and everyone around her.
Lila didn't just lie about meeting Ladybug, she lied about having an ongoing, close relationship with Ladybug, two very different things. And Ladybug isn't just a celebrity, she's a superhero who is fighting an active terrorist. If I had to rewrite this confrontation, I'd keep it pretty much the same and just change the "Miss Show-Off" line to something like:
Miss Show-Off here was trying to impress you and everyone around her, putting herself and all of you at major risk! You know that Hawkmoth would do anything to get these, right? (gestures at her earrings) Did you even stop to think about what he'd do if he learned the identity of my supposed best friend? Of course not. You were too busy trying to look cool to stop and think things through like an actual superhero! We keep our identities and relationships secret for a reason!
Is this the kindest, most gentle way to confront someone like Lila? No, but it's very in character for Marinette to be filled with righteous fury when she sees someone using her name for their own personal gain. I really can't blame her for getting incredibly angry at this total stranger presenting herself as a Ladybug authority and using that authority to manipulate Marinette's friends. As I've said before, take away the crush complication and Marinette's actions still make total sense to me.
I'm not a huge proponent of virtue ethics. That's the idea that you need proper motivation for an act to be morally justified. If you do the right thing for the wrong reason, then the act is bad no matter how good the results and vice versa. If you view the world that way, then sure, you could possibly argue that Marinette's actions were wrong just like you can also argue that Gabriel's actions were totally fine, but I don't view the world that way. Switch Marinette's motivation from jealousy and a little righteous fury to pure righteous fury and almost nothing changes. She'd still need to confront Lila, the words would just be a little different.
It's not like this confrontation stops Lila, either. Chameleon gives us this:
Lila: (in flashback) Not only did Ladybug save my life, we've become very close friends. Marinette: She lies with every breath. Nino: Wait. You eavesdropped on Lila and Adrien? That's not cool. Alya: A good reporter always verifies her sources. Can you prove she doesn't actually know Ladybug?
Quick mini rant before I give the next Chameleon quote: this isn't how verifying your sources works, Alya! You should be verifying that Lila does know Ladybug, not the other way around! Right now, Marinette and Lila have equal authority on the topic as far as you know and there is no evidence to support either claim, so you should be looking for proof that Lila isn't lying! Proof isn't a first come, first serve problem even though a lot of people fall into that trap. This is especially true since Lila goes on to make claims like this:
Lila: Of course Ladybug saved my life. She never misses an opportunity to rescue her best friends. Max: Didn't your tinnitus give you vertigo when you went up the Eiffel Tower? Lila: Oh no. Ladybug knows me so well that she brought me an earplug to stick in my right ear.
So Lila keeps right on lying about her relationship with Ladybug, presenting them as close friends, making it even harder for me to get on the "Marinette was in the wrong for privately confronting Lila" train. If anything, Marinette was too tame! She needed to go full scorched earth and have Alya post a public retraction that included a message about the dangers of claiming to be personal friends with someone you don't actually know.
If the show went that route and had Ladybug give an equally furious smack-down and Alya posted it without a second thought, THEN I'd probably be on team "Marinette needed to tone herself down because she went too far" because that isn't a heat-of-the-moment reaction. It's something Marinette would have time to think through. But Volpina didn't go there. Instead, we just get Marinette reacting live to someone using her name to flirt with her crush. Remember, this is the setup to Marinette transforming and jumping in to stop Lila:
Lila: Not only did Ladybug save my life, we've become very close friends because we have something very special in common- it's what I wanted to tell you about. I'm the descendant of a vixen superheroine myself, Volpina. Adrien: Volpina? Marinette: Volpina? Adrien: Wait a minute! I think I read about her in my book. Lila:(stopping him from grabbing the book) Of course she's in your book. She's one of the most important superheroes. More powerful and more celebrated than Ladybug. Between you and me Ladybug doesn't even make the top ten. My grandma gave me this necklace. [Marinette runs off to transform] Adrien: (holding Lila's necklace) Are you telling me this is a Miraculous?! (Ladybug lands in front of them)
This wasn't a planned confrontation. It was Marinette reacting live to some pretty massive lies. If Ladybug had been swinging by and just overhead this, then the scene once again wouldn't change much. That's why blaming Marinette for confronting Lila in the "wrong way" feels so victim blame-y to me. "How dare Ladybug not be perfectly poised at all times and react with grace when someone lies about being her close friend and teammate!" is not a take I'm ever going to agree with. And if you want to use the middle schooler defense? Then it applies to Marinette, too. She and Lila are the same age. Why the different standards just because Marinette has fame that she never asked for or sought out?
I've never been much of a fan of holding celebrities to an "always on" standard where their every interaction needs to be done with poise and grace even if the interaction happens out in the wild and not at a planned even where the celebrity can be mentally prepared for dealing with fans. That's extra true for accidental celebrities like Ladybug. Marinette didn't take up the earrings for fame and they certainly haven't brought her fortune, plus she has no PR training. Expecting her to be a PR master who knows how to handle her accidental fame is, once again, a little too victim blame-y for my tastes. Ladybug is here to save the world, not sign autographs. You can hold her to politician standards when you start paying her for risking her life on the daily.
There's a version of Lila where I would have a different take. A version where the lie really is minor and Marinette really did "overreact", but even there my lesson wouldn't be "Marinette was totally in the wrong" because I genuinely think that sends the wrong message to kids and kids are the show's target audience. Think about what you're actually saying here, "Because Marinette is famous, she needs to accept that people will lie about her and just ignore them even if people believe the lie."
While that isn't exactly a wrong take, it's still really messed up. It's not okay for people to use Marinette's name like that just because she's famous. The reason she needs to learn to let it go is because that's what's best for her mental health, not because her fame makes her lesser than others when it comes to things like personal privacy. The lies are not magically okay just because she's well known.
Remember, Marinette is a fictional character, but the kids watching this show are very real and they're way more likely to be Lilas than Marinettes. And the kids that do relate to Marinette in this episode? They'll be kids who have dealt with the rumor mill spreading lies about them or their friends without the celebrity complication. The show should not be telling either set of kids that Marinette is the one in the wrong here. That is the wrong moral and why I hate this episode so much. I might feel differently if the intended audience was teens and if this plot was allowed to be more complex, but none of that is true. The show is aimed at kids ages 5 to 12 and every episode is supposed to teach its own moral with Volpina's moral being "Marinette was explicitly and totally in the wrong here."
This is the age of internet personalities where there are more easily-accessible celebrities than ever and where many of them do not have the wealth needed to protect themselves from fans nor the PR training to know how to handle extreme fans if there even is PR training for that! That means that it's honestly really important for kids to learn to view these individuals as people who it's wrong to lie about and who deserve the same respect as non-famous people. Treating celebrities as public commodities is how we get things like the Kit Connor scandal where an 18-year-old actor felt forced to publicly come out because the internet wouldn't shut up about his sexuality. Oh, and since you brought up one direction, I'll also note that the band members have publicly stated that online shipping discourse has negatively impacted their relationships. So, yeah, I'm never going to agree that kids should be told that it's okay to lie about celebrities or treat them as fictional characters to play with and that the celebrities are the ones who are wrong if they get upset about that behavior. That shit is toxic.
If we go the "minor" lie route, then my version of this episode would be a very sad one where Marinette learns that people are going to ignore her boundaries and lie about her and there's nothing she can do about it. A lesson in mental health training that will hopefully help kids who are dealing with bullies, but that does not present Marinette as totally in the wrong. It just teaches her when to pick a fight and when to let it go, which is a very important skill to learn even outside of lies about your own person. There will be many times when you hear people say something that you vehemently disagree with and it's important to learn when to pick a fight and when to just let it go, knowing that no good will come from speaking up even if you're 100% in the right. It's a very sad, but also very necessary skill.
I think Adrien has a place in that story. A place where he still tells Ladybug to let it go, but it should NOT have been played the way it was in canon where he acted like Ladybug was totally out of line. He needed to be way more compassionate and understanding of her very justified anger. I've written Adrien giving advice on this topic before and it's always presented as, "people are going to be assholes and you have to learn to ignore them for your own well being," not as, "you are wrong to be upset about strangers telling lies about you. You agreed to deal with this when you decided to be a hero" because what kind of asinine lesson is that?
You could also keep Adrien's canon reaction and have the lesson be him learning that it's okay to have boundaries. That his fame doesn't negate his bodily autonomy and right to be treated with dignity. That people chasing him down, invading his personal space, and otherwise preventing him from living a normal life is wrong. I love it when fanfics take this approach to Adrien's part in the Lila conflict. It's very cathartic to see his friends supporting him and protecting him from Lila.
I really have tried to see Volpina from the "Marinette was totally in the wrong" perspective because I've come across it several times, but I just can't wrap my head around it. If you've got a counter argument, then feel free to try to change my mind because I've given you my full thoughts here, but know that I'm probably not budging on this one. You'd have to make some pretty dramatic changes to canon for me to feel like this take has a point. I think the only way that I'd be on Lila's side is if it was very clear that no one believed Lila and Marinette still had the same reaction that we see in canon as that does feel like going too far. But everyone believed Lila so that's not a solid argument and I'm just never going to agree that people have to be cool with others lying about them just because they're famous. I honestly despise celebrity culture so much and hate that people are basically forced to deal with that bullshit if they want to be successful in certain artistic fields.
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pboogerswbb · 4 months ago
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kayla’s retweets rn ijbol
THE WAY I LOVE HER SHE SAYING EVERYTHING PAIGE AND EVERYONE CANT SAY
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Daniel BRUHL hand on the hip moments
Well, here's a collection I didn't know I needed. Thanks, Anon! Here's a dozen from across his filmography:
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Karl Lagerfeld, Becoming Karl Lagerfeld (2024)
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Sebastian Zöllner, Me and Kaminski (2015)
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Paul Krantz, Love in Thoughts (2004)
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Niki Lauda, Rush (2013)
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Wilfried Böse, Entebbe (2018)
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Daniel, Colonia (2015)
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Alexander Kerner, Good Bye, Lenin! (2003)
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Tobias Hardmann, Dinosaurier (2009)
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David Kern, Lila, Lila (2009)
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Konrad Koch, Lessons of a Dream (2011)
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Hans Krämer, The Coming Days (2010)
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Roland Gumpert, Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia (2024)
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seas-of-silver · 3 months ago
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"Alya, we've talked about this hundreds of times - in all our lives we and our friends have never met someone called Marinette Dupain - Cheng - she is just a figment of your twisted imagination!"
‘Alya, we've talked about this hundreds of times - in all our lives we and our friends have never met someone called Marinette Dupain-Cheng - she is just a figment of your twisted imagination!’
Alya barely suppressed a growl as she glared at Nathaniel. ‘“Twisted imagination?” Seriously?’
Chloé scoffed. ‘Yeah, twisted. I mean, honestly - super-powered villains? Magical terrorists and superheroes? Who, by the way, are all animal themed and get their powers from tiny gods in jewellery? Alternate universes and time travel? Ugh! And the bit you’re flipping out about is some chick that supposedly meant to be in this class? Ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous.’
‘Alya, we’re worried about you,’ Rose said, her wide blue eyes swimming in genuine concern. ‘You’ve been so different this past week; you look and sound and behave like our Alya, but what you’ve been saying is just so unlike yourself!’
‘It’s kinda like you’re living a nightmare in real time, or something,’ Juleka muttered, and the whole class nodded in agreement.
The whole class bar Adrien and Marinette.
Alya was smart. She had figured out something was seriously wrong when she woke up last week and found herself in her room instead of Marinette’s, where she had been sleeping over. It became even more concerning when she arrived at school and Marinette was nowhere in sight. Then she had started to panic when the seating arrangement was different, Adrien wasn’t at school either, and worst of all - Nino barely knew her.
She spent the first class trying to casually enquire about Adrien and Marinette, which led to confused responses and almost getting reprimanded by Ms Bustier, who was still their teacher and had apparently never had a child, and Chloé’s father was still Mayor of Paris.
One reassuring discovery Alya had made before lunchtime was that Adrien Agreste still existed in this weird world, but had apparently never been to their school. She also discovered that Lila Rossi had also never been to their school, but that good news was quickly soured when she found out that Lila now has strong ties to the Agreste family, and was frequently seen with them. But that didn’t stop Alya from trying to contact Adrien, though she had no success.
Alya had then started to research, and kept researching throughout the week. This weird world had no mention of recent Miraculous use; no Hawk Moth, Mayura, Ladybug or Chat Noir, and nothing of note in Shanghai or New York. Her Ladyblog was also non-existent, which was discomforting in and of itself. And there was no Marinette.
That was the part Alya was struggling to grasp. No Marinette? A world without Miraculouses was something Alya could wrap her head around, as was a reality where Adrien never went to their school, but no Marinette? So she had researched that too. Everything Alya had expected to exist were also missing - the sunglasses and album cover (and subsequent magazine article) Marinette made for Jagged Stone; Marinette’s winning submission in the derby hat competition held by Gabriel Agreste and the runway show it was displayed in; her fashion photoshoot she did with Adrien and Juleka… none of it could be found.
Alya knew this was no dream that she had found herself in - this felt more like some sort of akuma attack-related displacement… but Alya couldn’t remember there being an akuma attack while she was in Marinette’s room. The last thing Alya had remembered before waking up in this weird world was setting up for a girl’s night in while Marinette went on patrol with Chat Noir, as the new Butterfly villain, Malachite, had been annoyingly active as of recent. She couldn’t shake the feeling that something was terribly wrong.
And now all her friends and classmates were looking at her like she was the weird one. Perhaps she was, at least to them.
‘You’re right, Juleka,’ Alya said sombrely, ‘this is a nightmare. Either I’ve somehow ended up in an alternate universe, or something god-awful must’ve happened for the whole world to forget about the Miraculouses in Paris, for Adrien to never have come to school here, for my own boyfriend to barely know me apart from just being one of his classmates, and for my best friend - a girl who meant so much to nearly everyone in this room - to completely vanish off the face of the earth!’
Everyone flinched at her raised voice, but she didn’t care. She was too angry, too confused, and too hurt to care about something as minor as that.
‘I- ugh! I feel like I’m going insane!’ Alya cried out, her eyes starting to sting. ‘I know what has happened here - I’ve lived it! I was a part of it! You all were part of it! But why don’t you remember? Why does no one remember? Ugh, it’s like, I don’t know, like someone’s messed with reality and gotten rid of any trace of Marinette and the Mira…cu…lou…ses…’
Alya felt violently ill. How could she have not thought of that? It all made perfect sense. But if that was really true, then Malachite must have…
‘Oh, God,’ Alya whimpered, sinking to the ground unsteadily.
The class bin suddenly appeared in front of her, just in the nick of time, and a kind, familiar hand held her hair back.
‘Can someone get the nurse or Ms Bustier?’ Nino’s voice came from right beside her. ‘She’s not doing good.’
People moved around her, but Alya could barely take it in. Her mind was overloaded with fear and horror. She needed to prove this horrific theory wrong.
‘Shh,’ came Nino’s voice again, his other hand starting to rub soothing circles on her back. ‘You’re not well, dude, and you’re shaking.’
She couldn’t dwell on that for long, as a loud commotion was happening outside and getting closer. Fear spiking within her, Alya forced herself to stand and get into a fighting position, ignoring Nino’s protests. She wasn’t going to lose anyone else, not without a fight.
The door slammed open, and Alya hesitated.
‘Alya? Thank goodness!’ Adrien cried, looking disheveled and winded. ‘I got your letters - you remember too?’
Her hands wavered. ‘Yeah. What do you remember?’
‘Oh, finally!’ Adrien exclaimed, relieved. ‘I thought I was going insane when I woke up to find Mother and Father alive and Lila-‘ he growled out, as if saying the name was like ash on his tongue, ‘-of all people was now a long-time family friend, which is revolting. But no one knows about the Miraculouses or Ladybug and Chat Noir or Hawk Moth or Malachite or akumas or anything!’ 
Alya wanted to cry - out of relief or grief, she wasn’t sure.
‘And you!’ Adrien said, pointing at Nino. ‘You hung up on me!’
Nino blinked. ‘So… that wasn’t a prank call?’
Adrien looked mortified. ‘You’ve… you’ve forgotten me? For real?’
Nino opened and closed his mouth, looking entirely uncertain about anything that was going on.
‘I was sure that you would remember me,’ Adrien continued, shaken, before looking back at Alya. ‘I tried to call everyone that I could remember the numbers of, but even Marinette isn’t picking up!’
Alya felt sick again at the mention of her name.
‘Surely you were able to get in contact with her,’ Adrien pleaded, putting his hands on her shoulders. ‘I’ve been stuck under Father’s and Lila’s thumbs for this past week, and I was only able to escape just now.’
With Adrien so close, she could see the anxiety, desperation and fear that was threatening to consume him.
‘Please, Alya,’ he begged, ‘please tell me you found her and she’s okay. She’s in danger, and I need to ensure she’s safe.’
All Alya could do was shake her head. She felt Adrien’s hands tremble and saw his eyes fill with tears as he began to hyperventilate, before he crumbled to the floor and let out a soul-crushing cry that shattered her heart.
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cerisecagliostro · 1 month ago
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Are we sure there's really a Lilla Anon? There could be more than one person. Meaning there may be no one true Lila Anon.
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My favorite unspoken part of the miraculous fandom is that the Lila anon on ao3 terrorizes writers so much that there is literally a fucking tag with two pages worth of stories dedicated to telling her to fuck off
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lilaanonsupportgroup · 2 years ago
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First comment on my new chapter!!
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Considering the plot of my fic (MDC is Dead) I kind of anticipated comments from them already. Already locked anon comments on the original fic so they're commenting on another one of mine that was recently finished (No, Mr. Wayne, You Can't Adopt Me!). Oh, and btw I write for the Maribat fandom.
Glad to know they're upping my comment count lol but alas I have to persistently delete these comments.
Ugh, and you got all excited because it was the first comment for the chapter, and then it ended up being her. She's a typical spoil-sport. She might be upping your comment numbers, but she certainly isn't saying anything important.
Maribat is an acquired taste for some, but as long as Lila makes an appearance, it doesn't matter what fandom it's for.
Looks like the Anon has been more active recently. We're always taking submissions!
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wisteriasymphony · 11 days ago
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wisteriawisteriawisteriawisteriawisteriawisteriawisteria have you perhaps played or seen Slay the Princess? There's cannibalism.
YES! In fact, I got to play it a bit at SerenityForge's booth at the last PAXWest, along with DDLC+. Here's a small sample of my pin haul :)
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Most of it I have unfortunately just seen and not played, however. ManlyBadassHero is my go-to for gaming videos (I *ADORE* his Who's Lila gameplay, which I have rewatched maybe seven times over? I feel like if you check it out you'll immediately understand me like 10 times better and idk if that's good or bad haha), but I will admit Markiplier was my first let's-play love so I will always have a soft spot for him...
As for the game itself, I feel like just mentioning the cannibalism (lovely as it is) undersells it!!!! Let's not forget the time loops, the lovely bickering between the voices in the player's head, THE NARRATIVE AS A DIEGETIC AND HOSTILE FORCE THAT THE PRINCESS AND PLAYER ARE BOTH TRAPPED INSIDE AND CAN ONLY REALLY WIN BY ESCAPING ENTIRELY?? And the idea of a person literally changing based on others' expectations of them.
uhhhh Slay the Prince Claudrien AU when uhuhu....
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sunsetosirias · 1 month ago
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I recall that someone made a "Marinette has allergies" au that quickly evolved into another series of Lila salt fics.
Oh, I don't think I've come across those fics. The closest that comes to mind is a fic where Marinette secretly can't taste sour things and that's how Kim and Nino tell the difference between the real Marinette and an akumatized Lila pretending to be Marinette since only they knew about it.
I haven't read Lila salt fics in a few years, the closest I've gotten recently is checking the Lila related plots in the salt fic section of TV Tropes, and even those can be a little bit too much for me most days.
I think my distaste for Lila salt fics grew when everyone who wasn't on "perfect angel who's never done anything wrong so feel bad for her suffering" Marinette was depicted as an absolute monster who deserved zero sympathy when Marinette and her entourage decimate their lives beyond repair. There'd never be a middle ground of people who wanted nothing to do with the teenage drama. Characters were either with Marinette as her "yes man" posse or plotting against her with Lila who deserved nothing pleasant in their lives ever again.
[this refers to my Why Allergies Are No Lie salt post]
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asktheumbrellas · 3 months ago
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now i hope this doesn't end in a fight but as a sibling of four myself i feel compelled to ask, who is each of you's favorite sibling?
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Diego, Luther, Viktor, and Klaus are playing poker when Allison walks in. Five has fallen asleep, his book sitting open over his face and his hands clasped together over his stomach.
“Could he be any more of an old man?” Allison quietly asks her siblings.
Diego chuckles lowly as he deals out a new hand. “We asked if he’d want to play with us and he said he’d slaughter all of us either way. Then he knocked out.”
“Grandpa needs his nap,” Klaus adds, eyeing his cards. “He gets grumpy without it.”
Allison plops down next to Viktor, who smiles at his hand. “He’s grumpy no matter what.”
The box begins to twirl again, and Allison reaches over to unclasp it and unfold the note that’s appeared inside.
After she reads it aloud, a silence fills the room so deafening that it startles Five awake.
Luther looks up at him in surprise, asking, “We’ve been shouting at each other for the past hour and you wake up as soon as it goes quiet?”
Five sits up, stretching his back and replacing his bookmark. “You idiots are always loud. It’s the silence that tells me something’s wrong.” He furrows his eyebrows and looks at his siblings individually. “What’s the issue?”
Allison rereads the note and Five nods. “Alright, who’s going first?”
Luther has a horrified look on his face. “Favorites with siblings isn’t a thing! I like all of you guys.”
Diego nods, placing down two cards and adding, “Yeah, I couldn’t pick between any of you.”
“Wait, Five, you have a favorite?” Allison asks, dumbfounded. All eyes turn to him in surprise after Viktor and Klaus add the blinds.
The old man swirls his coffee mug a couple of times before taking a loud sip. “Viktor and Ben.” He says it like it’s obvious.
“Can’t relate. I don’t have any favorites but I definitely have a least favorite.” Klaus looks at the empty space in the corner of the room, scowling dramatically. “Luther? You playing?” Luther nods, matching Klaus’ blind, and Diego places a third card face-up.
Five gets to his feet, circling his siblings to watch the game. “Nothing wrong with having a favorite or two. You guys are all… fine enough. Viktor and Ben… always preserved the peace and quiet, so I’ve always preferred their company.”
Silence hangs in the air once again.
“C’mon, you guys don’t have a sibling who you just really enjoy being around? It’s not like it means you despise the rest of us.”
Allison speaks up after a fourth card is placed and everyone checks. “I guess… I’ve always enjoyed Diego’s company. I think we make a good duo.”
Diego smiles at her, nodding. “Me too, sis.”
Klaus looks to Five. “I do like hanging out with Cinco. We took a road trip before the Kugelblitz, that was pretty rad. Even if he did drag me to a giant ball of yarn—”
“Twine,” Five interrupts.
“—twine for no reason.”
“It’s impressive, that’s all.”
Klaus rolls his eyes. “You are so elderly.”
Luther points at him, smiling widely. “You should’ve been there when I met Old Five.”
“Old Five?” Viktor raises an eyebrow. “I thought he was already old.”
“Well, technically, he was actually younger-”
“What?”
“We had to meet up with Five before he traveled forward in time from Dallas, before he screwed up the jump and turned himself all…” Luther trails off, searching for the right word.
“Little?” Klaus chimed in.
“Well, actually, he was just as small when he was actually old.”
“Really?”
“Yeah—”
“Klaus, who’s Ben’s favorite?” Five cuts Luther off.
“Me, probably.” He shushes the corner again, making it clear that Ben disagrees. He throws a few yellow chips into the pot and smiles.
“I think Ben was my favorite to be around,” Viktor says. “He and Five would come into my room after a mission and he’d tell me all about it while Five read to himself. And I’d play violin as they fell asleep in my bed,” he reminisces fondly as he adds chips to the pot.
Five has a small but genuine smile as he thinks back to his childhood. “Good times.”
Luther groans and sets his cards face-down and Diego follows suit.
Klaus evens out the bet before guiltily looking up at Viktor. “Alright, I’ll give it up. He says you and Five were his favorite, too.”
Diego lays down a fifth card, and Klaus squints at Viktor. He pushes his entire pile of chips into the center. “All in.”
Viktor mirrors the amount of chips and squints back. “On 3?”
Klaus nods. “1…”
“2…”
“3…”
All eyes are on the table as they set their cards down, revealing Viktor’s straight flush… and Klaus’ royal flush.
The room is engulfed in cheers and whoops as Klaus excitedly pulls the huge pot toward him. “And I didn’t even ask for Ben’s help that time.”
Diego stares at him, eyes wide. “That time?”
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