#Like what farms are feeding hogwarts?

[cateyedfox36]

and if you're consuming fiction, be it sf fantasy horror ect, and you can't answer that easily you can pretty confidently say the author isn't great at worldbuilding.

Honestly, if you're developing a setting, ANY setting, the first question you should ask is "where the food comes from?" Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, revolves about that question

[bluebipples]

im gonna go on a quick once in a blue moon harry potter rant but before i do that pls know i want joanne to choke on black mold ok? ok

how the fuck does their economy work. im so fucking fr. im like actually getting mad abt it. we all know u can't recreate money or food, yeah, ok, cool, and ron's dad can barely afford to feed his massive family and there's clearly no such thing as wizarding government assistance, so like? ? ? ? ? ? like the one time we see the weasley vault there's 1 gold piece, which isn't even enough for 1 textbook. ok they garden, sure, but that isn't a full ass farm, so growing enough to sell and eat doesn't seem like it's a thing at all. so what the fuck? and don't even get me started on how mrs weasley bought all those books from that one fucko. those were expensive as fuck, and she got them the year before her only daughter starts at hogwarts?? and im assuming ginny didn't have to wear hand me down anything because she's the only girl?? and im only assuming the robes aren't gender neutral because JKR is a bitch, but let's say they are, she still has other clothes to wear with her uniform. it literally makes no sense. the weasley's poverty is the fucking biggest fucking paradox to that entire series and yes i'm including the time turners. it makes no sense. and before someone is like 'u can be poor and have nice things', sure, u can, in real life where the money makes fucking sense and u can still have benefits that help aid in keeping u living somewhat comfortably.

and as a matter of fucking fact. idk how the UK works, but like how the fuck do birth certificates and shit work for wizards anywhere? if u have a kid it's kind of like illegal to not enroll them in some kind of education. do they say they're home schooled?? are any of these fucking people legal? do they legally exist in their own countries?? dude im fucking swaeting rn

[alittlebrownbat]

My Year-End Wrap Up

It's nearing the end of the year and I've read a lot, and I mean a lot of fics this year. Millions of words worth of fics. Refusing to acknowledge I have a problem; that's something I'll face in 2024. It's become my nighttime routine and my favorite thing to do before I fall asleep. I thought I'd do a little roundup of my favorites. They're mostly Wolfstar with a smattering of Dorlene and Jily. These are them, in no particular order:

Let's Play Pretend by MsAlexWp - I had trouble choosing between this and A Potter's Field, which I also highly recommend. I followed this work in progress (now finished) all summer and it was an absolute delight. R/S are both young, single parents and pretend to date to appease the nosy ladies in Sirius's building. It is chicken soup for the soul and will make you both laugh and cry. I can't wait to reread it.

The Fragile House of Black by @fantismal and Jormandugr - This is a series that has a brilliant interpretation of the Prophecy. I don't think it's a stretch to say it's the best magical AU I've ever read. It also has a few Peter POV chapters and gives a backstory for why the betrayal happened, something I feel was undercooked with the original series. Heavy on Black brothers healing. It is perfection.

The Many Lives of Sirius Black by enigmaticblue - A bring back Black treat, also a series. Sirius goes through the veil and meets Regulus, who presents him with a series of doors which will allow him to restart during specific years. We get to explore what it would have been like through each choice.

Honey Honey by @aeoneskova - Marlene is teaching in the muggle world after essentially being exiled for trying to prove Sirius's innocence. That is, until an underfed boy with a scar and glasses ends up in her classroom. This is heavily influenced by Matilda. Marlene is a bad ass loner who can do it all.

The Hand that Feeds by @rollercoasterwords - A canon-compliant Dorlene enemies to lovers fic following the two from Hogwarts through the first war. It gives us an explanation to why Voldemort killed Dorcas personally. This backstory is canon to me.

10 Reasons to Go to Michigan by @greyeyedmonster-18 - Remus returns to his roots in the Upper Peninsula after abruptly leaving a 10 year relationship. This is about finding yourself again, and sometimes finding a little something more. It's just utter perfection. Sirius being a literal potter makes me chuckle.

Just What the Doctor Ordered by @wrapped-up - Sirius finds a stray puppy who he names Padfoot and brings him to the local veterinarian, Dr. Lupin, for help. This is about heartbreak, and finding love, and growing up. It was hard picking just one by wrapped-up because everything she writes is a work of art.

Under a Big Blue Sky by @eyra - Sirius and James, two wealthy city slickers, help out on the Lupins' farm for lambing season. If you liked God's Own Country, I highly recommend this, and if you haven't seen it, I highly recommend both.

Don't Panic by redspottywellies - Lesbian Sirius and Remus absconding with Harry after the events of 10/31/81. This fic does action better than any I've read. Pure brilliance.

all the lonely people by superloonyluna - What would you do if a beautiful stranger asked you to join in an all-night heist?

The Archivist by @wanderingbandurria - An author and an archivist team up to uncover the mystery behind the commune in West Godric's Hollow. There is so much thought that went into world building for this fic.

Favorites Under 10K:

Signs of Affection by Kittycargo

Marlene McKinnon is Not a Coward by AllThisandLoveTooWillRuinUs

Never Doubt that It Was Real by @soloorganaas

Basilisks, Boggarts, and Boyfriends, Oh My! by optimisticdinosaur

I Love You A Latte by @jamesunderwater

My favorite WIPs:

As The Worm Moon Dies by @rollercoasterwords

Clear Eyes, Full Hearts (can't lose either way) by @greyeyedmonster-18

Dead to Me by @jamesunderwater

Right Back Where We Started From by @soloorganaas

Darklands by @newsom

Happy reading xx

[vellhighbandi]

Dreams...

You know for the longest time I thought the dream I had for my life was something wierd. Everyone I knew had these magnanimous opulent visions of a future they'd like to have, a family, a big mansion, world tour, fame... And I... For the longest time I dreamt of having a future where I wouldn't be judged by my family, for not loving choosing medical, for not being the girl who got their names in the papers. I always had the fear of what if I am not good enough, what if I fail, what if--- So I kept my dreams simple. A small house in the country, not very exotic, next to the pond in my own village. Some dogs, two horses and a baby elephant, and me. I'd have been happy. Teaching the kids in the village. Or maybe the adults too. Helping them plan their farms better. Have a planned planting sequence and helping clean the river that flowed right beside the village from that murky muddy brown with wierd bubbles floating on it to sort of clean clear stream... The bridge across the river finally getting completed and the roads being used being traffic and some random travellers stopping by to just take in the local peaks and sights. I hadn't even been brave brave enough to think of a partner in those dreams. I was pretty sure no one would want a disappointment like me...

Then I grew up. Not by much. I still have a whole lifetime before me (touchwood). Now my dream started ripping at the seams... Approval from family... That was never gonna be true. Not even when they got their dream of having their name and their photos splashed across the front page. They weren't happy. Wanted more. The thing about humans is that they aren't very different from animals, if you won't reward good behaviour and just punish bad behaviour... They'll eventually stop trying. No carrots only sticks can take you only so far... And having those animals in my farm... They need permit. And having a Husky or German shepherd in the climate is torture for those animals. And the villagers that seemed so welcoming to a 6 year old weren't that good from the eyes of a 13 year old child that had given up on ever being loved at all...

Couldn't remain without a dream for long now could I? So compromise it is. Do what the fam says. Get a job. Move out. Make money. Financial independence is the priority now... But then. I feel in love with writing. What a tragedy. Right? Straight A's student. IIT was just within grasp and what do you choose. Literature. Not even a proper Arts subject to go ahead and become IAS. But literature. What are you gonna do live in poverty all your life like Munshi Premchand and let your descendants have your royalties... Oh wait. You need a partner for descendants and proper talent for the royalties to even exist... So leeching on your family till you die. Better we get you married.

Hmm. The picture clears a bit. The mystery that came into my life when I should have been awaiting my Hogwarts letter was finally finding it's pieces. It wasn't a suicide without reason then. They just never took the obvious into account.

Sweet 16. The age where girls find guys to crush on. First relationships blossom... Here I was losing friends like falling dominoes. Losing hope with the dandelion blows away in the wind. This was supposed to be about dreams so let's come back to that... Sweet 16. Had to think of a dream achievable that maybe didn't sound so miserable. A job is a necessity. Animals we could do without. A house edging the wilderness cause Nature is the least I can hope to have. Pretty simple. A house in the woods. Some birds to feed every morning and night. A room in the house to decorate how I wish to be the one who I want to be, an author, a poet, an otaku for all that cares. Just as long as I remember to leave, close the door behind, I could live my dream... or atleast some part of it. Maybe not weekly treks and hikes, but maybe could find a way to sneak a yearly getaway to some cozy little cabin in the woods. That was all this little girl could dream after rationalising every wild fantasy that came to her...

[evil-danny-kun]

Ughh. I'm usually all for anything that poses itself as anti-capitalist, but there's so many problems with the point this post is making.

1. By Jove, the school program is fucking full enough. Not long ago I was there myself and while it wasn't all that bad for me, many of my classmates spent an average of 12 hours a day studying. That was the last three grades and our school had pretty high standards, but from what I've seen on the internet and heard from exchange students, 9-10 hours of studying seems to be a common experience among high schoolers. The pool of human knowledge has become so vast it needs to be studied for twelve years to get even a surface level understanding, and the students are barely managing. Unless something is removed, adding more subjects is the last thing we need! If we had everything listed in this post added, it would be most effective to just drop the commute and have the students sleep at school to get even a morsel of downtime. Bastard Hogwarts.

2. A regular person is not going to grow their own food. You need space and fresh, clean soil, so it's not really an option in cities. Also, if you've ever tried outdoor gardening you know it's very likely that all your hard work will get eaten by pests. Knowing how farming works is nice, but we need a system that feeds people collectively. Growing some of your own food won't solve anything.

3. Teaching wood working at school is fucking pointless, pardon my French. I took that class and it was fun, yes, but not useful. You need so many expensive tools and even so, it takes a lot of practice to produce a piece of furniture that is passable. It's such a specific skill set it's basically a whole job. Bad idea.

4. Auto shop class? Don't we hate cars?

5. Basic sewing and taxes - yes, but it's already in the program (in most countries).

Conclusion: it would be so nice to know so many things, but our time on this Earth is limited and we need to set our priorities straight. And unless we want to turn into medieval peasants, we need to prioritise science over practical skills. Thank you for coming to my petty TED talk.

[wednesdaynn]

new harry potter fic brewing: everybody lives au... differently

Harry is the boy who lived, he has the scar to prove it. but it doesn't matter anymore. He, like all other non-purebloods, have been ostracized from their own world. He lives just up the street of The Secret Phoenix School Of Magic where certain classes are taught in his old family home. the potter mansion laid in an exclusive part of england. hidden away behind forests and endless fields. The cottage down the road is where he grew up. His grandma, Effie, and his grandfather, Monty, had raised him to be a fine boy. He was always polite to strangers, cleaned up after himself, and knew to listen when the adults were talking. in return his family never dismissed his feelings. they never raised their voice, they always let him talk. considered his feelings. and made sure to give him everything he wanted, as long as he didn’t become spoiled. but one thing the potters were good at was lying, and Harry had found out. 

Hermione was a sweet young girl. with hair as uncontrollable as a lion's mane. eyes as sharp as an owl. a smile as bright as the sun. and the brain of a… well, a genius. Smart sounded more like daft when you were comparing to the likes of Hermione's thinking. quick witted with a sharp tongue, and mistrusting of everyone. she had been ecstatic when mcgonagall had shown up at her door, telling her about the world of witchcraft. she had told Hermione all about the school in which she was going to meet boys and girls just like her. Her parents couldn’t have been more proud of their little girl and Hermione was sure she could see a tear slip from her fathers eye. What she hadn’t known was that she’d be hunted down the second she stepped foot into this world. 

ron had grown up a lot like harry, humble house in wide expanses of fields, he grew up learning quidditch, helping his mom in the garden, feeding the farm animals, secretly practicing spells so to help out his mom with the house, and brothers that were the biggest inspirations to him. But the one difference between Harry and Ron, was that Molly Weasley couldn’t lie, even to protect her kids. Molly made sure her kids knew the cruel world they lived in, how much their father and their family had to sacrifice to live safely and freely. but Ron, being Ron, obviously thought his mom to not be truthful. Ron found they hadn’t sacrificed enough to be claiming to live in such a harsh reality. They get to go to Hogwarts, play Quidditch, go on to become apprentices, aurors, professors, unlike muggleborns. So Ron and his twin brothers, mischievous as they are, came up with a plan together with their old friend Tonks. they would be quitting Hogwarts and signing in to the secret school for muggleborns and make sure that the world would finally have a long overdue change. 

[bombardanne]

"A mistake. Just one mistake. Is that what you're really reducing it to? I notice you're not denying your involvement with our uncle," Anne says darkly, narrowing her eyes at Eilidh, circling around her. "Professor Hecat teaches Defense AGAINST the Dark Arts, not DARK ARTS for a reason. Our uncle warned you both against it. Ominis warned you both too. I never asked either of you to go that route. Have you no respect for others' thoughts on the manner?!

"Besides, you don't know Solomon the way I did! Our uncle took care of me, he continued teaching me. He taught me things I wouldn't have learned at Hogwarts' forsaken pace… Solomon spared time to read to me, feeding me, making sure I was comfortable, explaining why certain things wouldn't work as cures… He gave me the choice to go to a different farm, where Ranrok and his loyalists hadn't touched yet, but I chose to stay in Feldcroft because he did everything he could to make it my home too!"

She couldn't help it, she continued raising her voice venomously towards Eilidh.

"Just because Solomon destroyed Sebastian's last hope, doesn't finalise it as my own last hope! Who are either of you to decide what the last hope is? Can't you just admit it, that my brother became corrupted? Corrupted by what Salazar Slytherin and that relic claimed to offer? That he has to atone for what he's gotten into, one way or another?!"

Anne grew quiet at the mention of Angus. Oh, the things one would do for love. But that wasn't the only thing. With the familiar burning in her chest rising, she cast her eyes down, taking a step back, visibly breathing hard now… realizing then that it was futile to argue. She had nothing to gain from lecturing Eilidh, did she? She only set herself for more anger and disappointment, she understood less now. Only one and the same belief made sense.

"Whatever you think, if Angus truly has pure love for you, his sister, then I doubt he would want you to fall from grace like my own twin has…"

@bombardanne asked: "I don't understand, at least not through your eyes. Why, Eilidh… why don't you think Sebastian should go to Azkaban? Or… perhaps you're his accomplice? Until you clarify your reasoning, I can't help but think many things, a lot of which aren't favourable towards you."

It was a tricky question to be sure and the redhead sighed gently. She could see both sides. Just like she could see both the Keepers and Isadora’s sides. “You might not see it, and I understand why you wouldn’t… but he made a mistake Anne. He regretted it the moment it happened.” One moment of frustration and anger and it was done, a curse that could never be made right. Something that could never be taken back.

Should his entire life be over for one mistake against a man who by all accounts that Eilidh had seen; had belittled Sebastian, acted harshly to him, who tried to stop him saving the one person Sebastian had left. The killing curse was unforgivable for a reason, but should that mean that he should be locked away in Azkaban for the rest of his life? With creatures who would strip everything that made Sebastian all that he was?

“All he wanted, all he ever wanted, was to save you. Every time he found something that might help you, your uncle destroyed it. Did Sebastian go too far? Absolutely, but he only did so after your uncle destroyed the last hope he had of making you better.” It didn’t excuse it. She and Ominis has debated for sometime over what to do and in the end they decided to not turn him in.

“I know if it came to my brother. I would do everything I could to save him. How can I fault him for doing everything he can to save you when I would do the same for Angus?“ Merlin, or even the same for Sebastian or Ominis, or the friends she’d made at Hogwarts. Sebastian had lost his parents, found them that way, he’d clearly not wanted to lose Anne too.

[bridenore]

HD fic recs : Coffee shop / Bakery

Here are a few recs where Harry or Draco are working in a coffee shop or a bakery. Listed in alphabetical order, as always.

***

Chasing Treacle Tart (and Draco Malfoy) by xErised [23k]

Malfoy, who is sentenced to work as a dinner lady in the Ministry canteen, has an annoying habit of withholding desserts from Harry. Harry puts up with it, but when Malfoy stops him from getting his beloved treacle tart, Harry is determined to do something about it. And Ron? He’s really just there for the awkward flirting.

The Full Four Seasons by @ravenclawsquill [49k]

Draco Malfoy just wants a quiet life. He has a successful business, a lovely wife, and a delightfully horrible circle of friends. He’s fine. Or, he was fine until Harry Potter thundered into his life with all the subtlety of a blast-ended skrewt and turned everything on its head. Now he’s beginning to wonder if ‘fine’ is enough, after all.

Here’s The Pencil, Make It Work by ignatiustrout [49k]

Harry thinks “Why is Malfoy working in a coffee shop in muggle London?” is a much simpler question than, “Are you going to accept that auror offer and, if you don’t, what will you do?”

I’ve got you by oldenuf2nb / @dianacopland [64k]

Ten years ago, Harry resigned from the Aurors and effectively vanished from the wizarding world. So why is Draco suddenly thinking about him and what is the mystery behind the amazing cookies Hermione brings him?

If the Fates Allow by Saras_Girl [80k]

What’s that crackling in the walls? Harry has no clue at all. He’ll eat some cake and drink some wine Because he is completely FINE.

 –A story about life’s disregard for our plans. [2017 advent story]

Knead by laughingd0g [83k]

This is not a story about Harry renovating Grimmauld Place.

This is a story about coffee shops and brewpubs, about Ginny and Luna on a farm with creatures, about magical Oregon, coastal road trips, flying, friendship, and Draco Malfoy’s lean arms.

I hope you enjoy these stories as much as I did!

Left My Heart by @emmagrant01 [85k]

Auror Draco Malfoy has disappeared, and Harry Potter has been sent to San Francisco to find him. (Post-Hogwarts, set in February, 2004. Written before Half-Blood Prince was released.)

Surrender the Grey by @emmagrant01 [151k]

Draco Malfoy returns to London after five years of self-imposed exile to start a new life with Harry. But will the secrets of the past destroy everything they’ve worked for?  Sequel to “Left My Heart”.

Of Fates Entwined: A Story of Love Lost and Found by taradiane [51k]

Harry Potter vanished without a trace from his home on a warm summer morning in June 2004. This is the story of how a random visit in a cafe on the other side of the world, six years later, proved that the ties which entwine our fates together can never be broken.

Qui Vivra Verra by camomiletea [22k]

 “It’s just- It’s a bit funny is all. Draco Malfoy working in a coffee shop.”

 “Patisserie,” Malfoy corrected.

The one where Harry is a sad tourist and Draco feeds him croissants.

Sourdough by academicdisaster [17k]

Draco writes romance novels and doesn't leave his apartment much. Harry  bakes bread and sells it to Draco. Draco is quite weird. Harry might  like that.

Twelve Hours by @eidheann [14k]

The last thing Harry expected to see while leaving the takeaway was Malfoy dumping his garbage into a bin on the kerb of a Muggle neighborhood.

When hippogriffs and pygmy puffs collide by oldenuf2nb / @dianacopland  [33k]

Harry Potter bakes cakes, brilliantly. Draco Malfoy inks tattoos, brilliantly. Owls deliver post, including messages from clients, with an occasional lack of brilliance.

When It Alteration Finds by momatu [55k]

After the war, Harry left most of the Wizarding world behind and built a new life for himself in the Channel Islands. He opened a bakery and is happy with his life. Draco is a fiction author who writes under a penname, and he’s currently suffering from writer’s block. His agent suggests he try writing in a new environment and rents a cottage in the Channel Islands for him.

***

I hope you enjoy these stories as much as I did!

[imnotakoukinnieok]

Hogwarts Houses As Shower Thoughts

Slytherin:  Maybe plants are really farming us, giving us oxygen until we eventually expire and turn into mulch which they can consume.

Hufflepuff:  When I bake bread, I give thousands of yeast organisms false hope by feeding them sugar, before ruthlessly baking them to death in an oven and eating their corpses.

Ravenclaw:  What if Earth is like one of those uncontacted tribes in South America, like the whole Galaxy knows we're here but they've agreed not to contact us until we figure it out for ourselves.

Gryffindor:  My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me./ The fact that I can't recognize my co-workers outside of uniform 85% of the time, tells me superman knows exactly what he's doing.

[beiasluv]

‘See you again’ / Newt  Scamander x (fem!)Reader / pt.2

Hey guys i’m back! this following imagines is the sequence to the first part, check it out HERE.

words count: 1,161 words

warning(s): mentioned of pain

soulmate AUs: name appear on wirst when 17.

 (y/n) = your name / (y/bf/n) your best-friend name

*english is not my mother-language please forgive any mistake i might have made*

ENJOY!

---

‘happy birthday dear (y/n) happy birthday to you,’ with that (y/n) closed her eyes, her eyebrows twitched by making a wish. the fire was extinguished; vanished left a burning smoke behind. the room erupted with cheers and congratulations from your family and friends.

it is 7:36 the exact time you were born at st. mungo’s; what a time to be alive, you are finally 17 years old. which means your soulmate's name would appear at midnight soon tonight. you wouldn’t say you are not excited but you just can’t imagine who is going to be your soulmate, for the sake that you don’t even have a boyfriend/girlfriend. it could be anyone now, a friend at school, some stranger, or maybe a muggle. otherwise, you are rather excited for who it is.

‘honey? would you mind feeding the hippogriffs for today? i’m sorry it was supposed to be a special day for you but my boss is calling me an-,’ your mum was cut off and words stop falling from her mouth. 

‘it’s okay mum i can do it,’ you smiled lovingly to your mother. ‘thank you dear, i would grab sweets on the way back, i have to go now stay safe honey!’ mother grabbed her coat and ran through the door. 

‘Oh! (y/n) dear! make sure to watch for your wrist!’ she apparated away.

‘hey guys,’ you entered the shed of the hippogriffs. (y/n) maneuvered around the shed and grabbed five buckets of fresh fish. ‘ugh! i don’t know how you guys eat this,’ (y/n) gave a disgusted look to the fishes. ‘i can do it, there’s no need to fear anything, just be calm with them,’ you took a deep breath and a long one out.

each step you walk to the gate your heart beats faster and faster, and you feel like it was about to explode itself. the memory of the day your brother fall off the hippogriff, played back each step. it happened right here at this place. but (sadly for dad) luckily that hippogriff was brought by your very own school, hogwarts, so you were learning with that very hippogriff that dropped your brother in the care for magical creatures. with your little strength, you have arrived at the gate of the famous hippogriff bredder farm.

one final push the gate is opened, several hippogriffs head snatched to your way. you gasped for breath like your life is going to end. step by step your legs brought you to the middle of the farm you dumped the five buckets in. luckily your dad taught the hippogriffs to have manners, they’ll always wait until the buckets are fully empty. then they’ll dig in. 

‘oh! merlin’s beard!’ the hippogriffs came right into your face. (y/n) dashed away a few of them and ran to the gate. her legs don’t seem to be scared anymore, she felt like she is running very fast that she can do the olympics. a second later she had arrived, outside the gate. ‘phew, that was a close call,’ she walked back to the house and decided to call it a day.

---

‘night orion,’ (y/n) strolled past her brother’s bedroom. ‘night (y/n)! oh! be careful about your wrist my friends said it hurts like hell,’ orion poked his head out of the door his eyes were full of worry. ‘thanks ori, i’ll see you tomorrow then,’ you gave a weary smile and he was gone. 

speaking of care for magical, you are assigned to write an essay about one creature that inspired you, and describe everything about it. wheater is about caring, habitats, behaviors, appearance, you named it. 

‘i’ll guess i’ll just write the essay until my soulmate's name comes up then,’ that you grab your hogwarts trunk, unlock the password. for the first time, you opened your trunk this summer, you were in awe when she saw a gift from her friends with a note attached. 

(y/n) put the stuff on the side, and she seized the ink bottle and some parchments, but she can’t start your work without the Fantastic Beast and Where to Find Them book. ‘accio Fantastic Beast!’ for sure (y/n) would take the chance to use magic since she is finally not underaged. you scribbled your thought down the first sketch. each sketch you connected the paragraphs, making sure about your words and cut un-necessary pieces of information out. 

after several hours (y/n) looked up at the clock to read the time, and the clock's little finger was pointing between number 11 and the number 12. same with the long finger. ‘it could be any minute soon,’ (y/n) let out a long sighed. many minutes had passed (y/n) is now sleeping on her table waiting for her soulmate’s name.

not long after her wrist felt like being dipped into a fire. her wrist is burning as the letter formed, (y/n) didn’t notice the name since her eyes were filled with tears. the pain was eating her bit by bit. (y/n) decided to run to her brother. ‘orion!’ she called out as she was crying in the hallway. ‘(y/n)!’ orion ran and hugged you, he was worried for this day the most the day his sister knows her soulmate.

---

(y/n) never failed to do the big sister job in his eyes, and he realized he was gifted with the best sister in the whole world. he would do anything to protect his big sister, when he saw her tears it hurts him so bad.

‘(y/n) please show me your wrist,’ orion slowly reached for your hand and examined the burn. ‘N E W T O N, hm newton doesn’t sound so bad isn’t it?’ orion tried to cheer you up. ‘huh? did you say newton?-,’ (y/n) tried to open her dried up eyes. ‘tell me the last name,’ (y/n) requested her brother for assistance in seeing. ‘it’s S C A M A N D E R, salamander? scamander?’

‘Newton- newton scamader?’

‘BLOODY HELL, you won’t believe it orion-’ (y/n) sprung herself up and ran to her room. ‘wha- what?’ leaving her confused brother behind. he saw (y/n) holding a piece of paper, looking as new as it was manufactured yesterday, and a thick book. ‘what’s that (y/n)?’ orion squinted his eyes to see the text. ‘i’ve met him at hogsmeade when i was getting the Fantastic Beast book, and guess what- he wrote the bloody book himself!’ (y/n) rant about her stupidity forced the book into her brother's face. ‘i should’ve known it was him!’ (y/n) sighed and collapsed on the floor.

‘ms. (l/n) did you forget something?’ orion scoffed at you. ‘what’s funny? i didn’t forget anything? oH! the laundry?’ you rushed to answer yourself. ‘no you idiot don’t you see his address? on the bloody paper?’ orion shoved the paper right in front of your eyes. 

‘go find him.’

part three? :)

[ladyhallen]

Never Count the Cost

Read on AO3| FFN

It was hopeless.

The Death Eaters numbers weren’t going down. And maybe they were, but not visibly, not enough. Kill one Death Eater, and five more would take their place.

Hermione had given people new, more destructive spells and Ron’s strategies were getting more and more geared towards mass destruction. But it wasn’t good enough.

It shot down morale and everyone was getting desperate.

Harry was getting desperate.

She’d asked Kreacher, which was the start of a series of bad decisions.

Kreacher knew the Black Library better than anyone, and gave Harry a book bound in questionable leather.

Harry took one look at the book, and felt her skin crawl. She decided not to ask the house-elf questions.

“Thank you, Kreacher,” she said.

She read the book when it was supposed to be her turn to be sleeping, and lost her appetite at the horrifying and terrible rituals that the book had. She was pale and unhappy reading the rituals.

Still she found one. One ritual among hundreds that suited her purpose. A ritual to “Summone a Moste Powerful and Chaotic Monstere.”

Harry read it dozens of times, memorized the words and knew the sacrifice.

Desperation and bad decisions led her to the forest with a stone floor. She had left a note with Dean, hopefully, it would stall her friends.

Her hands remained determinedly steady even as she carved the damned sigils on the floor with an enchanted knife. Her hand slipped at one point and bloodied the runes on the floor. She paid it no mind, bandaging her hand and continuing again. She didn’t dare use magic until the ritual was complete and she broke the circle. She endured her throbbing hand and at one point forgot about it, she was so focused on getting it right.

She took a deep breath and started the chant, just as Hermione and Ron sprinted into the clearing.

But Harriet had already started, the words coming out of her mouth frosty and hot in turns, some words tumbling out as heavy as a boulder, others coming out quickly and speedily like an eel.

Ron stopped Hermione, more aware than her about the dangers of interrupting a ritual.

“…in sumptus vitae meae,” she finished with a shout, slamming her hands on the sigils firmly, smearing it with blood. At one point, she had started to bleed from her injured hands.

“Harry, no!” Hermione screamed, held back by Ron’s hands on her shoulders. Of course, her friend could understand the Latin.

Smoke started rising from the blood and sigils, and from that smoke, something with tall with horns emerged.

Harry would be panicking, except she had gone so far from panic that she’d circled around to glassy calm. She’d be hyperventilating later.

If there was a later.

“At the cost of your life, huh,” a lovely, deep voice said inside the circle. “That’s a very interesting payment.”

The smoke cleared, and standing inside the circle was a man. Or as close to a man as a demon could get. His horns were long and curled back, the points curling at the tips and shining a dull red. His eyes shone yellow and his teeth were very sharp. His feet were cloven hooves and covered in shaggy fur, with a tail that flicked as he stood.

And his face. Harry instinctively shied away from looking at his too perfect, too beautiful face.

“Whatever is your trouble, lovely summoner?” the demon asked.

“Me and my people are at war,” she said, as boldly as she could manage. “And I am willing to pay anything for you to help us win.”

The demons beautiful face started to smile, a slash of a terrible smile on an otherwise inhumanly beautiful face.

“Break the circle, dear one. And I will seal the contract with you. You’ve already given me such lovely blood,” he whispered, a hypnotic ring in his voice.

Harry found herself moving despite Hermione and Ron’s shouts in her ears. She broke the circle with the knife still in her hand and the demon stepped out.

As he did, there was a ripple in the world like an invisible curtain, and the goats feet, horns and tail vanished. In his place was a man.

Still beautiful, but no longer inhumanly so. Enough of a change that she could look at his face without feeling that otherworldly aura.

“I am a chaos demon,” he declared. “And we seal these things with a kiss.”

The glassy calm broke, and Harry managed to squeak out, “What?” before the demons lips were on hers and she was consumed by the best kiss she’d ever had, all heat and passion.

After a minute, he pulled away and smiled at her dazed face.

“Stay here, my bride,” he said.

Harry crumpled to the forest floor and her best friends rushed to her, holding her hands and touching her shoulders. Hermione looked seconds away from crying. Ron looked like he wanted to wrap her up in bubble wrap.

“He just called me bride,” Harry managed weakly. “What just happened?”

Ron gave a tired huff into her neck, hugging her almost desperately.

Hermione gave an exhausted sigh.

“Harry,” she began slowly. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but I think a chaos demon just propositioned you.”

When Harry whined pathetically, Ron started to give little huffs of hysterical laughter.

.

.

The three of them staggered into Hogwarts, holding onto each other for support as well as comfort.

For Harry, she needed the help. The ritual took almost all of her magic. If she were a weaker witch, she would be dead.

“Ms. Potter,” Professor McGonagall said grimly. “Something has changed the battlefield.”

They looked into Hermione’s Seeing Mirrors, and Harry tried not to cringe at the sight of the stylishly dressed demon just. Walking and causing immense destruction with just a gesture.

It was one thing to know you’d summoned a monster, and another thing to see said monster in action.

“Oops,” she managed. “I guess he was more effective than I thought.”

That caught everyone’s attention.

“You did this? At what cost, Harry?” Neville asked.

Harry gave a wan smile, and he inhaled in understanding. Before he could open his mouth, the chaos demon came strolling back, hands in its pockets and a very cheery smile on its mouth.

“My bride,” he said. “I have killed all the leaders and destroyed their souls and happiness. I will, of course, wait for a week to see if they reform. After that, we will marry.”

“Ex-cuse me what?” Seamus said loudly. The noise of a couple hundred students causing chaos was defeaning.

The demon picked her up like she weighed like nothing and carried her off.

.

.

Harry thought the demon would eat her soul. Or even just eat her, she hadn’t thought demons were picky about corporeality.

Nowhere does cuddling factor into it. Or hand feeding her grapes while making encouraging noises. Somehow, her fear just…went away when he was holding fruit to her mouth.

“You are too skinny,” he said, looking at her critically. “You must eat more.”

Uhm, no? They were at war…had been at war. Rationing was a thing. Still a thing while they solve the food issue because the first thing the Death Eaters had targeted were the Hogwarts Farms.

“If I eat more,” she explained to the demon currently holding her in his lap. “Then the children will eat less.”

He pouted. “And these….children…are important to you?” At her nod, he added, “then I will get you more food.”

He vanished for an hour, and returned with an entire freaking passel of pigs. Harry felt her mouth drop open.

“You will eat more?” he asked, like he hadn’t just solved their food problems for the next few weeks. If the keep some female alive and one or two boars, they can even keep some pigs for livestock and feed the entire school for years.

“Sure,” she said weakly. “I’ll eat.”

He looked so immeasurably smug that she wanted to hit him.

.

.

Outside the repaired grassy knoll beside the Great Lake, Harry enjoyed the rare sunshine and the lovely view of the lake.

Well. She tried to.

“Harry,” Hermione whispered. “Can I see the ritual you used?”

Harry had no qualms about that. Just. There was a chaos demon sleeping on her legs and she couldn’t move, or make much noise.

“Ask Kreacher,” she whispered back. “I don’t think I’m moving anytime soon.”

The chaos demon, who still hadn’t given his name – that was bothering her, hugged her thighs tighter, his face on her stomach. Harry oofed, leaning back to be more comfortable.

“Get me a book?” she asked her friend. “I’m stuck.”

Hermione looked bemused and handed over The Hobbit.

Harry, who actually hadn’t read the book yet, found herself combing her fingers through the demon’s hair as she read. Eventually, the heat of the sun and the cool wind combined with the firm weight on her stomach made her fall asleep, the book falling on her face.

Unseen to her, the demon’s tail flicked with pleasure.

.

.

A week filled with trials and burials later, she finally broke.

“What’s your name?” she asked. Hermione, opposite her in the sofa, crossed her arms frantically. Well, too bad for her, but Harry was tired of these unsaid things.

“It’s Reborn,” he rumbled. “And you are Harriet.”

Something about the way he said her name made her shiver.

“Yeah,” she said. “Why didn’t you eat my soul?”

He slow blinked at her. “That was not what you offered. You offered me your life. Not your death, or your soul, or even your blood and bone. Just your life. Obviously, in order for me to partake of your life, you have to be alive.”

“You are…feeding off me?” she asked.

“No,” he huffed. “I am experiencing it with you.”

Ron choked. “Isn’t that just marriage?” he coughed. His face was red. Harry’s own face was steadily going red.

The de – Reborn nodded. “I know! It surprised everyone too. It was so forward.”

Harry covered her beet red face and groaned.

.

.

Reborn had to leave on some business. According to him, paperwork originated in hell and it was needlessly complicated. If he delayed further to log his contract with her, he’d have to fill out an extra fifty forms.

He kissed her very thorougly, rendering her stupid for a minute, before leaving.

Hermione then pounced, explaining what went wrong. Thank Merlin for Hermione, the lack of explanation reason was driving her crazy.

“You read it wrong,” she said. “And a good thing you did. Though how on earth you read ‘animae’ as ‘vitae’, I wonder. It saved your life.”

Harry blinked at the horrific ritual book and sighed. “I was reading it sleep deprived and at one point, I think I was starting to hallucinate?”

“You and your luck, Harry,” Hermione said. “And did I scold you yet for summoning a chaos demon?”

Harry felt her everything tense up. “…No,” she cringed.

She prepared for a lecture mostly done in yelling. She was braced for it.

Except Hermione hugged her tightly instead. “Thank you,” her dearest friend whispered.

Harry felt unintentionally teary. “For you and Ron? I would do it again,” she said into the bushy mane.

They both took a moment to compose themselves.

“So,” Hermione said in that tone that by long association, made Harry feel dread. Hermione only ever used that voice when she was being a little shit. “The chaos demon didn’t proposition you. You propositioned him first.”

“Oh my god,” Harry groaned. “You’re never gonna let this go, are you?”

She gave Harry such a look of mischief. “Never. I thought you were going to die, Harriet Potter. I’m going to say this to your wedding, and to all your birthdays.”

Thank Merlin that she was still alive to have birthdays.

She complained to Hermione just for the spirit of it, but was just as glad.

[thebittahwizard]

Random Fic Recommendation: A List of Stories that Prove that Literally Everyone Wrote Teen Wolf Better than Jeff Davis

A list of Teen Wolf fics that keep me coming back. Enjoy, motherfuckers.

Part 1: Sterek

Bittersweet and Strange, Finding You Can Change (Learning You Were Wrong) by WithMyTeeth

Explicit. Sugar Daddy AU. 49k words. Cute smut? Is that even a category? (It is now.)

Cupboard Love by mklutz

Gen. Cooking AU. 32k words. The cute theme continues, but without the side helping of smut.

Divided We Stand by KouriArashi

Mature. Mystery. 156k words. No description could give this fic the attention it deserves. Read it. It’s replaced canon in my brain.

Don’t Feed the Wolves by Amazonia_8

Explicit. Smut. 30k words. This is basically just long smut set in a universe where werewolves are known, and that’s just the way I like it.

Fire Burn and Cauldron Bubble by pandacowwhipster

Teen. Hogwarts AU. 13k words. Stiles is a genius potions student and Derek is the new werewolfy groundskeeper. *chef’s kiss*

I don’t know why, but I guess it has something to do with you by LunaCanisLupus_22

Explicit. A/B/O. 17k words. A story that is equal parts ridiculous, fluffy, and sexy.

Important Things by suzvoy

Mature. Canon Divergence. 71k words. In between battling lizard monsters and hunters, Stiles gets curious about the enigma that is Derek Hale.

Little Wild Animal by DiscontentedWinter

Explicit. Feral AU. 61k words. The Hales find a feral Stiles Stilinski. Growth, found families, and feelings ensue.

Mated by otter

Explicit. Neckz N Throatz AU. 37k words. Modeling is hard, y’all—especially when your hot werewolf partner hates everything and everyone.

Midnight Wolf vs Abominable Snowman! by orphan_account

Teen. Comics AU. 20k words. Stiles is Derek’s number one fan, he just doesn’t know that Derek knows that.

Move A Mountain by ZainClaw

Explicit. Human AU. 69k words. Stiles and Derek fall in love over the course of one hot week during summer.

my heart’s been offline by thepsychicclam

Explicit. Celebrity AU. 58k words. Stiles owns a farm and Derek is basically a Kardashian. It’s amazing.

On Building an IKEA Den for an Alpha Werewolf. by orphan_account

Mature. Canon Divergence. 13k words. Man that orphan_account really churns out some classics, am I right? Anyway, the title doubles as a summary. Handy, that.

Play It Again by metisket

Teen. AU AU?? 63k words. My first Sterek, and the one I always come back to. Stiles is fucked after Peter goes on another spree, so he uses a magic necklace that slides him one universe to the left.

[Sleep]Walking After You by relenafanel

Mature. Human AU. 56k words. Stiles and Derek are neighbors in New York City. That’d be ripe for a meet-cute except for how Derek keeps breaking into Stiles’s bedroom while he’s asleep.

Stilinski’s Home for Wayward Wolves by owlpostagain

Teen. Canon Divergence. 35k words. What happens when Stiles is the new kid that moves to Beacon Hills after the events of season 2? He becomes pack mom, of course.

The White Hart of Winter by DarkAthena

Explicit. A/B/O. 65k words. A bodice ripper that soothes the 14-year-old that used to sneak historical romances that still lives in me.

Waiting by isthatbloodonhisshirt

Teen. Feral AU. 81k words. There’s a creature that the citizens of Beacon Hills keep locked up out of sight. Stiles is its newly selected caretaker.

Words Cannot Espresso How Much You Bean to Me by isthatbloodonhisshirt

Teen. Coffee Shop AU. 68k words. Stiles is a human working in a werewolf coffee shop owned by Peter. Derek starts working for his uncle. Puns and love ensue.

[j2hoes]

Meet The Family. (Draco Malfoy x Reader)

Summary: Draco finally visits Y/N’s family home for the first time. The trip ultimately brings them closer together. (Set during Order Of The Phoenix).

Word Count: 1,982

Gif Not Mine. Requests Are Open!

Warnings: None, I don’t think.

Draco's hand gripped mine tightly, his palm clammy and coated in a thin layer of sweat. He's nervous. If his hand didn't give it away, the look in his  smoky grey eyes definitely did. Squeezing his hand, I offer him a bright smile as my eyes glance over his outfit. "You couldn't have worn something a little less formal?" As much as I love Draco's style, it really isn't appropriate attire for the occasion. His crisp white shirt is accompanied by a form fitting black suit jacket. On his feet are a polished pair of undoubtedly expensive shoes. It would be the perfect outfit if we were attending a meal of some sort. Not visiting my family home. "I don't see a problem with my clothes. After all I need to make a good impression." He tells me, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "My family will love you! Now, sit down with me. My brother is late as usual." Taking a seat at the edge of the long, dirt road, I cross my legs beneath me. Embracing the warm summer sun as it hits my face. Draco looks at me as if I've gone mad and I find myself giggling slightly. Of course he won't sit down. He grew up in a manor of all places. "I'm no peasant Y/N." "And I am?" I tease, shielding my eyes from the sun as I glance up at the pale boy. Before Draco can say anything else the sound of a vehicle approaching silences the pair of us. When it comes to a stop in front of us, my brother hops out of the driver's seat. Immediately scooping me up in a rather tight hug. "This is Draco, my boyfriend." "I know who he is. Everyone knows the Malfoy's." My brother states, glaring at the blonde boy who has taken particular interest in his shoes, focusing on them rather than my brother. Hauling our trunks into the back of the truck, my brother climbs back into the driver's seat and motions for us to get into the back. Upon looking into the passenger seat, I spot our two dogs stretched across the seats. Rolling my eyes, I pull myself up, offering a hand for the still timid boy. "Are you sure this is safe?" Draco asks me as we take seats upon a stack of hay directly behind the back window. "It's as safe as riding a Nimbus 2000." Leaning into his side, we watch as the numerous fields slowly fade into the distance. The ride to my house is short, though by the time we reach the farm, I'm ready to be home. As soon as we jump out of the truck, my mum comes hurtling out of the door. A huge smile set upon her face, making her look much younger. "Draco! It's so wonderful to meet you. Our Y/N talks about you non-stop, always talking how much of a charming young lad you are." She says, wrapping her arms in a friendly hug before he even has a chance to react. By the look on his face this reaction is unexpected. Draco was determined that my family would hate him, what with the Malfoy reputation. It's fair to say that my brother isn't exactly the biggest fan of Draco. At least not yet anyway. However, I always knew my mum would love him. "It's a pleasure to meet you Mrs Y/L/N." He states, a small smile forming on his face. "Enough of that nonsense! Call me Y/M/N. You're family now lad, whether you like it or not." I can't help but grin as watch the interaction between the two of them. Pleased that they are actually getting along. The slytherin wraps an arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer out of instinct. My mum notices and although she tries to hide it, she can't help her smile from becoming impossibly wider. "Y/N, just because your boyfriend is here that doesn't exempt you from your chores. I expect everything to carry on as usual, do you understand?" My mum's voice switches instantly, from sweet and friendly to calm and stern. "Of course, I wouldn't dream of slacking off." With that my mum scurries back into the kitchen, presumably to prepare dinner. Taking Draco's hand, I pull him inside and up to my bedroom. My house is probably nothing like his. Although I've never been, I've made assumptions. Malfoy Manor sounds like the type of place that is all polished marble and sleek furniture. Whereas my house is wooden and practically falling to pieces, with odd pieces of furniture that simply do not match. As odd as it looks, it's home. Closing the door behind me, I look on in content as the blonde takes in my bedroom. He slowly walks around my room, careful not to miss anything as he stares at each poster and picture that are stuck to my walls. Kicking off my shoes, I flop on to my bed. Staring at the glow in the dark stars that are still stuck to my ceiling. "I'm sorry its so messy and childish. It hasn't really been redecorated since I was a kid." I admit, hearing the sound of his footsteps as he continues to look around. "No, it's cute. It's very you. I like it. I mean, it shows you had a childhood." Smiling at his words, I realise that Draco and I most likely had extremely different childhood's. His being controlled by his parents, telling his what he can and can't do, who he can and can't be friends. Mine being so relaxed and carefree, simply doing whatever I felt like. I feel the weight on my bed shift and Draco's face is hovering above mine. He looks so relaxed, something that I haven't seen him feel for a long time. Not since you know who came back. "You're so beautiful." He whispers. Pressing his lips to mine, I feel the happiest I think I've ever felt. One hand cups my face while the other is positioned next to my head, holding himself above me. My fingers comb through his perfectly styled hair, emitting a low groan from the back of his throat. His tongue gently dips into my mouth as the hand that was cupping my face slowly begins to make its way down my body. His cold fingers slide under my shirt and trace patterns along the skin of my stomach, causing goose bumps to form all over my body. Before his hand can travel any further however, the door is thrown up and my brother stands there with a disgruntled expression set upon his features. "Get off my sister." Peeling himself away from me, he sits at the end of my bed. Sighing slightly, I push myself to sit up. My brother has his arms folded and eyebrows raised as he spots my slightly swollen lips. "Mum said dinner will be in about twenty minutes. She also said you need to feed Chester and Ruth." He tells me, voice monotone as if he doesn't want me to see how he's feeling. Nodding my head, I wait for him to leave before moving. Pulling my boyfriend off the bed, I quickly shove my feet into my shoes and head out of the bedroom. We pass my mum as we dart outside and she simply throws us a soft smile. "Who are Ruth and Chester?" Draco asks, once we're outside. Smiling slyly, I don't answer and instead continue walking to the barn at the back of our house. The sound of hooves against the mud, catches his attention before mine. Looking down in disgust at his now mud coated shoes, yet he continues to follow me into the barn. "This is Chester and Ruth." I say, grabbing a bag of horse feed. Hopping the fence with ease, I begin to fill their buckets with food, only to realise that Draco is still stood by the door. A wary look on his face, as though he's unsure whether he should come over or not. Waving him over, I climb back over the fence and hand him an apple. "Hold your hand out, palm flat. One of them will come to you and take it. They love apples." I say, holding an apple out myself so he can copy my movements. Chester comes over and snatches the apple out of my hand, Ruth follows and takes the apple from Draco. Although he still looks somewhat scared he doesn't run away from them. Which I take as a good sign. Stroking Chester's head, I hear Draco's breathing begin to shake slightly, causing me to look at him. "Are you okay?" I ask, concerned for the boy. "Y/N, where's your dad?" The question was obviously plaguing his mind. Presumably the reason for his shaky breaths. He probably didn't know how to ask. Or didn't want to upset me. "You don't know? I thought everybody knew." "Thought everybody knew what?" He asks, even more curious than he was seconds before. "He's dead. Back when we were in third year he was killed by a group of deatheaters. It was all over the newspapers. It was all anybody could talk about at Hogwarts. I guess that's why my brother is so cold towards you. Especially since your dad's a deatheater." "Is that why you're so against the idea of meeting my parents?" "It was two years ago. I've been through the whole grieving process. I don't want to forget my dad, but I want to move on if that makes sense. If I meet your parents, especially your dad, I don't think I'd be able to handle it. At least not yet." Wrapping my arms around his waist, I rest my head on his chest. Listening to the sound of his beating heart as one of his hands strokes my hair gently. He kisses my forehead gently before bringing my face to look at him. "I understand. There's no rush. I love you and that's all that matters." My heart fills with warmth at those three little words. It sounds like heaven as they spill from his lips and I know that this boy has stolen my heart completely. It sounds silly but it's true. "I love you too." With interlocked hands we walk back to the house just as mum is placing dinner on the table. Taking our seats, we wait for my brother to join us before helping ourselves to chicken and vegetables. The stone cold glares my brother keeps throwing at Draco don't go unnoticed by me and I try my best to ignore it. That is until he tries to cause an argument at the kitchen table. "Don't you feel bad about the way your family treats people? Don't you feel bad that your father has killed people?" "Draco isn't his father!" I object, taking his hand in mine and gripping it as tight as physically can. "No, but he'll follow in his footsteps it's only a matter of time." My brother is looking for a reaction, I know that and judging by the fact that Draco is simply looking down at out hands, he knows it too. "Mum tell him, this isn't fair!" "Quit it. The both of you. Your dad wouldn't want our guest to be treated like this. Draco is apart of this family, so you will treat him like it. Y/N is right, he isn't his father. So show him some respect." My brother continues to eat in silence, looking at neither me nor Draco. I know he won't warm up to him easily but hopefully with a bit of time they'll become some sort of friends. At least for now, there is no more hurtful comments or icy glances. For now everything is peaceful.

[hpdabbles]

After Work

Sirius kicks the door closed behind him, rubbing at his neck. It had been a stressful day with three or more false alarms, by some punks who thought the emergency firecall floo was a toy, and the Aurors had responded to all of them.

Every single time, it was to report an area in which they “felt like Dark Magic Curses were active” and every single time it was somewhere nasty smelling or humiliating. 

While the Department of Magical Law Enforcement notice the pattern of these jokesters they still had to go make sure no Dark wizard or witch was up to something sinister.

 Since Sirius was one of the only members on the force who had qualifications to be a cruse-breaker he was sent out with every team. Meaning he spent all day, crawling through the waste pipeline of a local pub, shimming down a garbage shoot, raiding a woman’s pants store and had to listen to three different pair of angry mobs made of parents complain about Aurors not doing their duty to the people and how he abuse his power all because he needs to close down three different broom flying parks where their kids had been playing.

Three threaten to put a complaint about him with his department head and Sirius was sure they would actually do it because they are all still convinced he was a Death Eater that got away.

It didn’t matter that he was found innocent, that he won his trail and that Harry had been handed over to him to raise. In their eyes, it was another case like the Malfoys. 

Sirius Black had most likely bought his way out of Azkaban. 

Sometimes Sirius wonders what Remus would say if he just quit the Aurors and move them to the countryside. It’s not like he needs the money. 

Besides being an Auror doesn’t have the same appeal without James at his side anymore. 

“Sirius!” Harry squeals happily, running down the hall with his hands up for a hug “Sirius is home!”

Feeling his terrible mood start to melt away, Sirius bents down opening his arms for the little body that slams into him. Wrapping the boy between his forearms he swings him up, grinning like mad as the giggles the four-year-old releases. He holds the child against his chest, letting little legs hang on the top of his stomach. “Hiya pup! Did you miss me?”

“Uh-huh. This much!” Harry spreads his arms as wide as he can nearly tipping over. Sirius’ heart melts.  

“That’s quite a lot!” He gasps dramatically. “You couldn’t have missed me that much!”

“I did!” Harry bounces looking as serious as a four-year-old could. He puts his hands on Sirius’ cheeks forcing the laughing blue eyes to look into his green ones.  “I missed you so much! Really! Tell him, Remus!”

“He did miss you,” Remus supports the child who beams. His husband gives him a quick peck on the lips. “Welcome home, Padfoot. How was work?” 

“Ugh.” 

“That bad?” 

“You don’t know the half of it.” Sirius leans in for another kiss, throwing a small smolder for extra effect. Remus rolls his eyes but he can’t stop the twitching of his lips. He likes the smolder he knows he does. 

Warm lips pressed against his own just as Harry loudly shouts. “Ewwwww! Kissing gross!”

The boy pushes on his chest and the pair break apart laughing. Harry then starts talking about his day, explaining that Remus and he had planned Hogwarts with Remus as the student and Harry as the professor.  “I taught Remus how to count all the way to ten!”

“Did you really?” Sirius asks with a grin. He follows Remus into the other room, where a portable blackboard has been set up before the coffee table. On it, there are various papers filled and coloring supplies. He puts the boy down by the blackboard. “Would you teach me? I have a hard time after five.” 

“Yeah! It’s easy! Take a seat and Professor Potter can teach you everything!” Harry waves a hand at the coffee table, picking up a piece of chalk. He takes great care to write out a shaky number one. He is all but beaming with child-like joy.  “Class is starting.”

“Of course Professor.” Sirius is quick to tuck himself at the table, letting his legs stretch out.  Harry launches into his lesson, which is mostly the little boy holding up his fingers and counting, asking every so often if Sirus understands or if he wanted the green eye lad to start over.

Together the pair counts the figures and he makes sure to mess up every so often so Harry can “teach” him properly.

From the doorway, Remus calls out.  “I’m going to start dinner. You boys have fun.”

“Can I have carrots?” Harry asks like Sirius knew he would. Ever since Remus introduced baby carrot sticks to the boy in the form of a game where they pretended to be baby rabbits together, Harry wanted them all the time. 

“Yes Pup, I can get some carrots. If you eat sheep-broccoli too.”

Harry’s face scrunches up, displeased by the counteroffer and Sirius jumps in before this turns into an issue.  “We get sheep-broccoli Professor Potter? We can all play Wolf Hunt!”

Wolf Hunt was just the three of them howling in the kitchen while feeding broccoli which Remus shaped like a sheep to Harry. It was one of the few ways they could get the boy to eat his vegetables and show off Remus’ various cooking skills.

Sirius can still remember the full farm, made entirely of greens his husband had put together last year after Harry showed a positive reaction to the babby rabbit game. 

Green eyes lit up at the meant of Wolf Hunt and Sirius knew he won long before the boy said. “I’ll eat all the sheep-broccoli! Awoooooo!”

“Awoooooo!” Sirius and Remus echo both smiling when Harry dissolved into helpless laughter. He gives another long howl and the two join him, which has the boy clapping his hands.

Remus disappears into the kitchen, leaving Sirius to entertain the child who has forgotten all about being a professor and instead crawls all around the living space, howling and giggling. He’s soon joined by his godfather, who has yet to change his Auror robes, crawling and growling like Padfoot.

At one point Harry climbs onto Sirius’ back, who changes his growling to terrible attempts of neighing like a horse and gives the boy a ride all around the room. Harry is having the time of his life, shouting “Giddy-up! Giddy-up Sirius!”

Sirius neighs, then crawl rapidly across his carpet, laughing as the child screams in pleasure. Tiny hands fist into the cloth of his robes using them to keep his balance, and he can’t help but feel warmth in his chest at Harry’s shouts  “Horsie! Horsie! Remus look! Sirius a horsie!”

“That he is. Be careful not to fall.” His husband answers and he throws up a glance to see the love of his life smiling in the doorway. In his hands are a bunch of broccoli that need to be shaped and one tomato.  A heavenly smell of spices drifts through the air making his stomach growl.

He hopes Remus is making curry. That’s one of his favorite dishes by the werewolf.

Harry kicks his lets into Sirius's ribs.  “Giddy-up! Giddy-up!”

“Neigghhhhhh!” Sirus shouts throwing his head and shoulders back, making sure to press against the couch so Harry rolls off into the cushions. The boy tumbles into them breathless with laughter already trying to get back on but Sirius is making it rather difficult.

He bucks and shakes laughing alongside his godson while his husband- who till this day he doesn’t know why the werewolf agreed to marry his worthless butt- made them dinner. Later Sirius will clean up the table, do the dishes and settle down for some of muggle telly his two most important people at his side. 

It’s nice to return home to this. An evening with his family after a long day of work is just what he needs to feel like himself again.

Maybe he should put in his two-week notice. Harry seemed to like horses and farms already, so the countryside didn’t seem like it be a problem.

[myrskytuuli]

YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK ABOUT WAY TOO MUCH!!!???

Where do wizards in Harry Potter universe get their food?

No, listen! This is actually a very interesting question, when you start to really think about it. Rowling doesn’t exactly give us any facts about how the food distribution in the wizarding world is handled, but the facts we do know are these:

1.       Hogwarts is always described with ample amounts of food, the students get banquet full of food three times a day, every day, and students are also known to visit the kitchens where the house-elves practically stuff them with even more food.

2.       No food stores are ever described in the books, expect form Honeydukes, the candy store.

3.       While the wizards have their own distinctive dishes (pumpkin juice) they mostly eat traditional British foods, made with “normal” muggle ingredients.

4.       Pure-blood wizards are shown to be incapable of using muggle services.

5.       One of the basic laws of magic is that you cannot conjure up food. (Gamp’s law)

Therefore, where does their food come from? (Ryan Bergara voice) Let’s get to the theories.

1.       There are wizard farmers, and the magical world is self-reliant when it come to food production.

Doubtful. First of all, even if one were to figure in the aid of magic, the percentage of the population needed to produce all foodstuff, would be big enough that their presence should be visible in the story. There are no children of farmers in Hogwarts, who are planning to go back to work on their family fields. Now, one possibility would of course be that the fields are manned not by humans, but by creatures, house elves for example. But once again I doubt that, for the simple reason that Hogwarts diet seems too varied for that. Diet produced by self-sustaining agrarian farming is very simple, and clearly, they already are exporting chocolate, coffee, tea, spices, and fruits in. That would mean a corresponding wizarding food production for every edible ingredient around the world. I just do not think that it would be practical for the magical world to use that much energy and manpower to establish their own independent food-trade.  

I do think that most wizards at least partially produce their own food. The Weasleys have their chicken-coop, and Hogwarts grows pumpkins. The Malfoy estate probably does have a garden that the house-elves take care of, and the death eaters are in Half-Blood Prince mentioned drinking elf-made wine. But small-scale food production like that would not be capable of keeping the entire wizarding population at the 20th- 21st century standards of eating. The Weasleys are never mentioned going hungry, and the muggleborns at Hogwarts never complain about the food being plain and unvaried.

The question of where all magical creatures get their food, is more complicated. I’m ready to believe that creatures like the centaurs hunt all their food, but Goblins probably have to trade with wizards. (or maybe they have underground mushroom farms. I don’t know what they eat)

2.       Wizards shop in muggle supermarkets

Yeah, clearly no. Some witches and wizards who might have muggle backgrounds or have simply accumulated into muggle society, and live amongst muggles anyway, probably do this. But people like the weasleys? The Malfoys? No way! Malfoys would never set a foot in a muggle shop, and all their serving staff consists of elves, who for obvious reasons cannot exactly line at the self-checkout line at Waitrose.

3.       Wizards steal form muggles

It would make sense at the first glance. Wizards are known for oblivating muggles in order to get access to their stuff. The train to Hogwarts was built by muggles, who were then afterwards oblivated. (pottermore information) and the unfortunate muggle Mr. Robert’s never knew that he had been chosen to host the quidditch world cup at his campsite. However, when it comes to food, you would need to do this repeatedly and constantly. If the muggle farmers don’t know that they need to produce x amount of potatoes for Hogwarts every year, they are going to notice that an x amount of potatoes is missing from where they were originally headed. Also, from the wizarding point of view, it would be incredibly risky to not have any kind of dialogue with the people who are producing your food. You might want to know where your food comes form, what has been done with it, and the security of knowing that you will have food being produced for you in the future.

4.       There is an agreement between international food suppliers and Magical world

The only way that for me makes sense, is that there is a trade deal between the Minstry of Magic and international food suppliers like ECD and STC. They buy all the necessary food supplies in bulk and deliver it for the wizards. There also has to be some type of agreement to cover it up by claiming that the potatoes are heading to Tesco, or some other big chain food distributor. There is a paper-trail for everything, and the amount of food needed to feed an entire underground population is not exactly easy to hide, but if there are enough people in high places who know, I’m sure it can be done.

But what is really interesting, is who is in charge of this on the wizarding side of things? Is it the ministry? Is there a government monopoly for food distribution in the wizarding world, and is that why keeping a chicken coop in your backyard is a good insurance knowing how weak the ministry can be?

Or is there some private family who at the onset of 19th century realised an opportunity and now owns the only company that sells food in the wizarding world? When Narcissa Malfoy makes a list of ingredients they will need for the next dinner party/death eater gathering, who will she give that list to? To the house-elves who pop into the marketplace, or does she send it straight to some wizard who works in the food business and then brings the food straight to the manor kitchens?

I feel like the question of where do the wizard get their food would have been something that could have been explored during the last book when there was, you know, a war going on. The chain of getting food from the muggle suppliers to the magical world cannot be very thick. In order for it to stay hidden, it has to be pretty centralised, and controlled only by a small amount of people. And breaking that chain during the war could have made things pretty interesting in very chaotic ways. 

[selecaos]

full name: humphrey oliver belcher nicknames: humph, belcher, “that weird man who created a cheese cauldron” nationality: british zodiac: saggitarius education (and house, if applicable): hogwarts / hufflepuff wand: 12 3/4″, walnut, dragon heart string, quite bendy special skills: animal husbandry (preference/skill set being towards cattle and dairy producing stock). inventive magic, some spellcrafting, and a positive attitude. boggart: the downfall of the family farm, burning down and being left cold and abandoned because of his other pursuits. destroying the family lineage through sheer idiocy – the smoldering ruins of hopes and dreams, because of his. mirror of erised: a small level of notoriety -- not necessarily fame -- but being known for doing something, even if it’s a footnote, that isn’t just keeping the farm from collapsing in on itself. amortentia:  camembert, fresh dew, burning wood, and something stranger – further ammonia mingling with the more natural (vaguely unpleasant) scents from the homestead. Properly aged sherry finished scotch.

worst thing about them: some lack of critical thinking and foresight, with a few notable exceptions. humphrey has a general belief that things will work out, despite any obvious signs to the contrary, if he works hard enough and tries to stay as much on the positive side of things as possible: things will work out. the farm will run another day, cheese cauldrons will get made, everything will be fine even if it’s on fire. he’s hard to read for that reason, he could be burning alive and seemingly content with it. first impressions: he comes in with a bang – literally or figuratively, it depends on the day. humphrey belcher is tall, a little bumbling, and by all accounts unassuming until he isn’t; a nice enough fellow, quiet and self-contained. unorganized, easy to excite, an unnecessary twitch at the corner of his mouth, generally not put together and not what is expected. tripping over his own two feet, maybe not entirely there. he smells like something that you can’t quite put your finger on, ammonia maybe? maybe it’s soot, corn? cheese? (you would question the latter, but it makes sense, when you think about it.) possibly tripping over himself, as he is late – again. not the sort of man with a successful anything. aesthetics: sleeves pushed up to his elbows, mud covered boots, dirt under his nails, and clothes that are far too patched (nearly worn through, needing to be replaced, but too far down on his list of things to care about). singed eyebrows, burning wood, something broken – something always broken, something always needing to be fixed –, cracked floorboards, wrinkled papers, shelves overflowing with books and mismanaged notes. too many animals, lists or he will forget something (feed the goats, mind the dogs, tend to the pasture), reminders scattered around, piles upon piles of tools. cheese, scotch, a bottle of wine or two (or three). (cheese cauldron, a line of them, various cheeses and various combinations.) character parallels: jeremy chetri - wynonna earp; anton sokolov & piero joplin - dishonored. mabel & dipper pines - gravity falls. connell waldron - normal people.