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sunnyie-eve · 2 years

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22 | You Sound Ridiculous

Series: Valentine Addams | Wednesday

Paring: (Xavier Thorpe x OFC Addams! Tyler Galpin x OFC Addams!)

Word Count: 1859

Warnings: death, false accusations, kissing, betrayed by someone trusted

21. More Than.. | 23. It’s Him

"Look at this. Lucas gave me information his father was looking up before he was murdered. He was investigating Laurel Gates. He started after Outreach Day. According to British police Laurel was presumed drowned, but no body was recovered. And the Gates mansion was purchased a year ago by a 90 year old candy heiress. She mysteriously died and gave all her belongings to her caregiver, Teresa L. Glad." Wednesday walks into my room as I was on the computer.

"Anagram for Laurel Gates. So she secretly bought her old house and comes back to Jericho as someone else. Why? To get revenge on all the people she blames for her family's misfortune?" I turn to face her.

"The Mayor, the coroner, our parents. Most of all Nevermore. The Hyde is doing all of her bidding since she controls it." Wednesday smiles, "Now we just get Dr. Kinbott to confess she's Laurel Gates."

"We? What do even you have to say it's her?"

"The flowers in her room at the mansion are the exact same flowers she took when visiting Eugene in the hospital. I mean it's so easy for a psychiatrist to slip in and out of a hospital undetected. Why would someone so overqualified want to be here? To crawl through outcasts minds till she found one to manipulate for her revenge." Wednesday goes on a rant explaining her reason.

"Wednesday, that's not evidence. Nothing really pinpoints Dr. Kinbott." I stand up from my desk.

"You want to know why you've changed? It's all because of her. She got into your mind." Wednesday steps closer to me making me roll my eyes.

"You sound ridiculous, Wednesday."

"Explain to me why you randomly changed then when you didn't want to?" She raises her voice.

I just stare at her like she lost her mind, "I didn't not want to, I was just confused to new things." I try explaining to her.

"No, you changed when you started your session with her."

"Have you ever thought that maybe I just wanted to change deep down and I did because I felt comfortable for once to open up to show that I keep locked away deep down? Enid and especially Tyler know parts of me that not you, Pugsley or even our parents don't know about." I step closer to her.

"You really are a disappointment. Kinbott got to your head and made you this way and made you not see the truth about her or Xavier."

I just stare at her shaking my head, "You're jumping to conclusions with no sold proof to back up you stupid theories. Hopefully you feel stupid when you turn out to be wrong with you accusations." I shoulder check her leaving my room.

I wish I knew who the real Laurel Gates was and who the monster was just to make Wednesday feel stupid for being so wrong. I mean yes, Wednesday had a theory compared to me but flowers aren't enough evidence. Then for Xavier having secret sessions with Kinbott wasn't odd, especially if you didn't want anyone to know you were seeing someone to talk about your life and problems.

"Thought you were ignoring me?" Xavier's video brings me out of my thoughts and I notice I walked all the way to his shed.

"Wednesday has officially lost it. She believes Kinbott is Laurel Gates who unlocked you, the Hyde, during your secret sessions." I take a seat on a stool.

"And her evidence?" He turns to face me crossing his arms.

"Kinbott brought Eugene the same roses that we found at the Gates mansion in Laurel's childhood bedroom. You're the monster because you paint it without ever seeing it and you show up after things or always around before something happens. But if she uses that logic then Tyler is in the same boat with you there in being around. I just can't wait till she's proven wrong. And she thinks I'm different now because Kinbott has got to my head as well making me not see the truth about her or you."

"That's just theories with no sold proof to back her up." Xavier walks over to me.

"I know, and I told her that. I know you aren't the monster and there's no way Kinbott is Laurel. I have no clue who the real people are and I wish I knew to make Wednesday feel stupid. I feel like I would already know or seen some hint because I've had some physical contact with everyone I talk to. I just want this to be over with. I don't want you, my friend, or the first therapist I like and trust to be falsely accused of murdering people."

"You're right, I may have not believed in you since day one but you've believed in me since day one. You're way more of a true friend than me." He sits on the stool next to me.

"If what Rowan told Wednesday is going to happen... if she never came and it was just me would all this still go down like it is? It would have to be because the murders started before she showed up. So if I never came as well..." I look at him.

"I wish I had answered for you." He looks at me as well.

"Oh, I hate you Nevermore." We both laugh.

"So Enid slipped... How was your second date with Tyler?" Xavier changes the topic messing with his hands.

"Good, but Wednesday was there. He decorated the crypt for a picnic and a movie. He asked do I like scary movies and I got excited but I got slightly tortured watching Legally Blonde. So that literally was a horror movie to me but I hated to admit I secretly liked it deep down."

"Enid got you used to the color pink?" He chuckles so I nod my head, "As much as I hate Tyler... I happy he makes you happy. You're my friend after all and I care about your happiness. And I mean it. I promise from now on I will stop with my sassy marks about him. I still hate him but I'll keep it locked away around you."

I lean over giving him a hug, "That means a lot to me. Really, Xavier."

"You're actually hugging me?"

"This is your one chance to hug me back because I don't give out free hugs." I tell him so he hugs me back.

I headed into town to check on Kinbott because I'm sure by now Wednesday has already been by accusing her being Laurel Gates.

"Dr. Kinbott." I knock on her door not getting an answer. "I'm not here to accuse you like Wednesday did. I'm here to check up on you." I wait for a response and still get nothing so I go in to see her laying in a pool of blood. "Dr. Kinbott." I rush over to see her struggling to breath.

"Val." She coughs up blood.

"No, no, no. Don't talk, just keep breathing." I tell putting a hand over her wound to stop the bleeding as I pull out my phone with my other hand calling for help.

"He..." She tries speaking.

"He? He who? No, don't try talking. Just hold on then you can tell Sheriff Galpin who did this to you." I say seeing she wasn't going to make of help doesn't get her faster. "This is a small town! Why are they taking so long!"

"You...him." She closes her eyes as help rushes in though the door.

They take her to the hospital and Sheriff Galpin takes me to a room to question me, "You didn't have a session today so why did you go see Dr. Kinbott?" He asks me as I sit looking at my recently washed hands.

"Wednesday went to go see her accusing her of being Laurel Gates. She thought she was the master of the Hyde. Her stupid evidence was roses we found at the Gates mansion because she brought Eugene the same roses. I didn't believe in her little theory... I wanted to come check on and when she wouldn't answer I opened the door to find her in a pool of her own blood."

"Did she manage to say anything to you while being awake?" He asks so I look up at him,

"I'm shocked she tried saying my name. Said him then me and him. I told her not to talk because it would make things harder for her. I told her to save it to talk to you who she saw but... I know she isn't going to make it. There was too much blood. I regret not saying say his name."

Sheriff Galpin sighs taking a seat next to me taking my shaking hands into his so I look at him, "She won't be able to say his name in that much shock. She kept it short and what ever words she could form. Don't feel guilty for telling her n't to talk."

"Why are you comforting me, Sheriff?

"Because I can tell this is effecting you. Once I found out your full name, I did my research on you since my son took a liking to you. Knowing what you did to people in your past and trying to kill people yourself... I can see you aren't the same girl anymore because your hands wouldn't be shaking nor would you feel guilt." He tells me.

"Why still comfort me, someone you hated around your son, but not comfort your own son about topics? I get it's hard to talk about but he's your son. If you don't open up, you'll lose him in a different way." I take my hands back from him.

"For starters; I want to make sure you're fine because you mean a lot to my son. You make him happy and that's all I want for him. And I know I need to open up with him but it's hard for me. The things after her pregnancy with Tyler that lead up to her passing... I don't want him to know." Sheriff Galpin looks away from me.

"If all you want for him to be happy then talk to him. He really needs that from you. Not just being nice to me. He needs you more than me. You're his father. I'm just a outcast girl he likes."

"He takes after his mother a lot but in that case he takes after me. I'm going to check in on Dr. Kinbott. Weems and Wednesday are out in the hall." He gets up leaving the room and I follow.

"Are you okay, Valentine?" Weems gets up walking over to me while Wednesday stares at me.

"I'll be fine." I force a smile.

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caitlynlynch · 3 years

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Looking to earn some extra money? Enjoy audiobooks? Picky? I might have an opportunity for you!

So it seems like I'm finally going to have to accept that there are not enough hours in the day to do everything I want to do, which means it's time for me to outsource some work. THE JOB: Audiobook editing and proofreading, 4-10 hours per week. Full training provided. I book work 3 months out and can guarantee work until at least the end of January, but it is dependent on ME continuing to get booked! THE PAY: $40 (US) per FINISHED hour. I estimate it will take about 2 hours to make 1 finished hour when you first start, maybe getting down to 1.5: 1 as you get quicker. I will pay weekly via Paypal. WHAT YOU NEED: Familiarity with the British English accent and how words are pronounced differently to American English. A reliable computer, an internet connection that can handle download or upload of large files which you have access to on a daily basis. The free software Audacity and a Google account so you can access Google Drive. Good headphones, earbuds, or a speaker and a quiet place to work. The ability to read the text at the same time as you are listening... this is how my screen looks when I am working:

The top half of the screen is the 'waveform' in Audacity and the bottom half is a Google Doc. I read and listen at the same time. If I find an error, I mark the place in Audacity and then flip to another Google Doc and make a note of what has to be done to fix it. I'll provide a couple hours of training via Zoom until you're comfortable with what I need from you, paid at half rate, and any time you have a question after that you can just shoot it through and I'll get back to you as quick as I can. I record mostly romance, though I'm currently working on an epic fantasy. If you don't like/can't handle listening to sexy scenes, this might not be the job for you. If you have triggers you need to avoid, just tell me: I can ensure I handle any chapters which might be a problem (I recently narrated a book with miscarriage, for example, and found myself in tears more than once!). Think this might be the job for you? Shoot me a DM here on Tumblr and we'll have a chat. EDIT: I think I found someone. Thank you to everyone who signal boosted. For those folks who reached out and actually already have mad audio skills and want to get into the audiobook editing space - you're actually overqualified for what I'm looking for, and I'd be underpaying you, but I do have a resource to share. Please check out this FB group. https://www.facebook.com/groups/140624362803564 This is where a LOT of audiobook editors and narrators hang out. Proper job oppos do come up in here and there is a lot of info and skill sharing too.

#job opportunity #audiobook editing #time to outsource

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hawaii5-0gurl · 3 years

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A Marine and A Seal: Part 2

Paring: Steve McGarrett X Reader (Eventually)

Characters: Reader, Daniel Green (OC), Nick Collins (OC), John Sparks (OC), Duke Lukela, Kono Kalakaua, Chin Ho Kelly, Danny Williams, Steve McGarrett, Reader’s Parents

Word Count: 3703

Warnings: Angst, Language, hint of flirting, Minor Misunderstanding

A/n: this is part 2 of ?? I haven’t finished writing it just yet. So I don’t have an exact number yet.

Feedback is always welcome. The Good and the Bad. It actually helps me as a newbie writer.(Yes I consider myself a newbie...)

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After getting back to base, you and Rolland were taken to the hospital. You made sure they took care of him first before they even looked at you. You were in your room waiting to hear what was going on with Rolland, when you had an unexpected visitor.

The knock on the door got your attention. You looked up from your computer to see Green standing in the doorway of your hospital room.

“What do you need Daniel?”

“Umm… I just came to check on you and let you know that Rolland is out of surgery. He’s going to make a full recovery.”

“Thanks for the update, and I’m fine. I have had a lot worse than this trust me.” When he hung around you could tell there was something on his mind. “Anything else?”

“Yeah, I wanted to apologize.” He all of a sudden became shy, he rubbed his hand on the back of his neck. “I was a complete ass to you when I found out you were leading the team. I was more worried about the fact that you were a woman than how overqualified you are. Then I ended up getting you shot. I am more than sorry about that. You were an amazing leader, one of the best I have seen. You were going to sacrifice yourself to save the rest of us, hell you almost did.” You held your hand up to get him to stop talking.

“Listen, you’re not the only one who doesn’t like having a female leader. I have dealt with worse Marines trying to get me kicked out of missions. When I came into the Marines, I busted my ass night and day to be one of the best, while most men did only the required work.” You just shrugged. “Thank you, but if you ever have someone out in the field that is not willing to do even half of the things I did today, then they should really reconsider a career change. You don’t enlist in any branch just for the hell of it, we do it to help, save and protect people. If that means giving up my own life to save another, I’m going to do it.”

Before either of you could speak again, your commander came walking in.

“Major, it’s good to have you back.” You tried to sit straighter, but your commander waved you off.

“It’s good to be back Sir, even if I am a little banged up.”

“I know you wanted to talk to me about taking a leave of absents. I have to be in D.C. tomorrow so I figured it would be easier to come and talk to you before leaving.”

“Yes sir, I did. I need to take some time off to think about things. The marines have been my entire life at this point, and I am starting to think that it might be time to consider other things.”

“You want to be discharged?” You had completely forgot about Green.

“Not exactly. I was thinking maybe Reserves for now. I haven’t exactly made up my mind.” You sent a look over to him, hopefully he would shut up.

“Well, I will grant your Leave, but we are going to have a more private talk.” He looked over to Green who was looking down at the floor. “But if this is something that you really want to do, I’m sure we can figure it out.”

“Thank you, sir.”

After he left the room, there was this awkward tension. Green hadn’t looked up; you were just sitting there trying to figure out why he cared so much.

He left without saying another word.

“Are you really going to leave?”

“I’m not completely leaving, if I’m needed, I will be back. I have spent the last eighteen years in the Marines, I don’t know anything else. You never know I might absolutely hate being a civilian and want to come back immediately when my leave is over. This is something I need to do.”

You were released from the hospital after two days. You went home and started packing your bags. You had planned most of your trip while you were in the hospital. You just needed to confirm the dates with your hotel. When it came time to leave, Sparks and Collins wanted to drive you to the airport. They weren’t happy with your decision, but they understood why you had to do it. Green on the other hand had been avoiding you for the last week. Every time you tried to talk to him, he said he was busy, even when he wasn’t.

About a week and a half later, you had to do one last meeting before you could leave. This meant you had to be in your Dress Greens, and you would have to go to the airport in them. You hated the idea of that, but you can’t change it. After the meeting you grabbed you bags and carried them to Collins’s truck. Just as you were about to load up someone came up behind you guys.

“Room for one more?” Green was standing there, you turned around to see him.

“I don’t know, you sure you can handle me leaving like and adult now?”

“Yes. I’m sorry I was acting like a child.”

“Alright, load up.”

The ride to the airport wasn’t too bad. You were just going to miss these idiots. You started wondering if you were making the right decision, but quickly shot that down. You were, this is something you were doing for you. If you didn’t do it then you might regret it later.

Once you got to the airport, Collins parked in the lot, all of you got out and you hugged them goodbye. You went to grab your bags, but Green grabbed for them first. You looked at him confused.

“We’re going to walk you in, come on let’s go.” He said as he threw one of the bags to both Collins and Sparks.

“You don’t have to do that. I’m sure you guys have to get back.”

“No, we have the rest of the day off.” Sparks gave you a big smile.

You walked into the airport, checked your bags and got your ticket. All of you walked over to TSA, you stopped and looked at all of them.

“Well, I guess this is goodbye.” You gave them a small smile.

“No, it’s see you later. You’re not going to get away from us that easily. Even if you decide to leave.” Collins was the first to hug you.

“Yeah, no matter what you do we will always be there for you.” Sparks following behind Collins.

Green walked up to you and just pulled you into a hug.

“Let me know when you get there safely. I mean let us know when you get there.” You let out a small chuckle.

“Definitely, I will do that.” You let go of him, looking to all of them. “Stay safe boys. If I find out something happens to any of you, I will personally come back just to kick all of your asses.”

“Yes Ma’am.” They all said in unison, they gave you a salute.

You turned away and walked through security. They stayed there until you were completely out of sight. You had a 10-hour flight ahead of you. you were simply happy that you had nobody sitting next to you.

You had decided to go to Hawaii to visit your parents. They had retired to Hawaii about 5 years ago. You had lived there when you were in your teens. It was your favorite place that you had been moved too. You even made some friends there, that you still keep in contact now.

You haven’t seen them in a long time. Even though they only retired 5 years ago, it has been many more since you have seen them. You have been busy doing missions, training recruits, etc. You weren’t even able to go to their retirement party because you were overseas. You have tried to stay in contact with them, but those phone calls were few and far between.

Now you were sitting outside of their house. You didn’t tell them you were coming, you wanted it to be a surprise. You just wished that you could have changed out of your dress greens. You stepped out of your rental truck, adjusted your uniform before closing the door. As you were walking up to the front door you saw the curtains move, as if someone were watching you. Once you got to the door you rang the doorbell, you slightly turned away from it to look around their neighborhood.

The door opened behind you, as you turned back around you kept your head down slightly.

“Please don’t tell me something happened to Y/n.” Shit…

“I knew I should have changed.” You looked up to see your mother with tears in her eyes.

“Oh, you ass.” She immediately wrapped you in a hug. She ended up hitting you in the back while she was crying on your shoulder. “You sacred the shit out of me!”

“I’m sorry mom. I didn’t really think about it.” You looked up to see your father coming up behind you mother.

“Pipsqueak?” you mother let you go; you were in your father’s arms almost instantly.

“Dad.”

“What are you doing here? Not that we aren’t happy to see you, I figured you would be training or saving the world.” He let you go to pull you over to have a seat. You mother sat down next to you while your father sat in his chair off to the side of you.

“I decided to take leave for the first time, instead of being forced to take it.” You took your cover off and placed it in your lap. “Actually, I have been thinking of transferring to the reserves. I want to see what the world has to offer, outside of combat boots and fatigues.”

“Woah! Are you serious? Y/n, the Marines has been what you wanted to do ever since you were little. Are you sure you want to do this?” Your father sat forward in his seat to look directly in your eyes.

“I know it has. It’s just after my last mission, I started thinking about life and all the things I wanted out of it. I absolutely love the Marines and I wouldn’t trade my experiences for anything in the world. It’s just in this moment I just need to figure things out for me.”

“So, are you going to move to Hawaii?”

“I think so. This was one of my favorite places to be growing up. I even called Kono and Chin to see what they were up too. I’m going to meet them after I came to see you guys, at ‘Iolani Palace. I figured while I was there, I would pick up an application for HPD.”

You could see that your mother didn’t like the idea of you going from one high risk job to another. She just wanted you to be safe.

“Are you sure HPD is where you want to go? If you are trying to get away from all of that, I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

“It’s a lot less risk than the Marines mom. Plus, it’s something that I can learn fast and adding my military background it’s one of the few jobs I would be good at.” You turned to her giving her had a reassuring squeeze.

You stayed with your parents for a few hours before you needed to leave. Once again you didn’t have time to change before going to see Kono and Chin like you had hoped. Your mother barely let you out the door, she made you promise to come back for dinner and to bring Chin and Kono if you could.

You walked into the Palace; you didn’t really know where to go. You saw a few officers and civilians around. You walked up to the officer behind the desk to ask where to go.

“Excuse me.” You quickly looked at his name plate. “Sgt. Lukela, I’m looking for Officer Chin Ho Kelly. He didn’t give me many instructions on where to go.” He looked up and was instantly taken back. He stood up before speaking.

“Yes, he is a part of the Five-0 task force. They are on the second floor, there are signs that lead you to them. I could call and have her here in a few minutes, or I could escort you there.” He looked at you with a nervous smile.

“No that’s okay Sir. I’m sure I can find it.” You were about to leave but turned back. “Are you alright?”

“Yes Ma’am, just wasn’t expecting to see a Marine in here today.”

“Oh, I didn’t mean to make you nervous. I just didn’t have time to change out of my uniform.” You gave him a quick goodbye before heading up the stairs.

You followed the signs just like he had told you, you came to a couple of glass doors. You saw someone inside, but you could instantly tell it wasn’t Chin. This guy was shorter and had blonde hair. He looked up from a table to see you, he started walking over to you. You opened the door and walk in.

“Can I help you?” You could see him look you up and down.

“I am looking for Officers Kelly and Kalakaua. I’m supposed to meet them here somewhere.” You gestured around.

“There are in their offices. I’ll get them.” He turned away to go to the offices.

“Thank you…”

“Danny.” He said turning back with a smile.

“Thank you, Danny. I’m Y/n.”

He walked into an office in the left, you saw Chin’s head pop up with a large grin on his face. Danny moved to another office, while Chin got up from his desk to come out. Kono did the same, she even ran around Danny to get to you faster. She came running to you and pulling you into a hug. Chin came and hugged you both. Danny came up behind them.

“Y/n, I have missed you!” Kono practically yelled in your ear.

“It’s good to have you back here.” Chin joined in on the hug.

“Guys, umm I’m still not fully healed yet.”

They quickly let go of you, you grabbed your shoulder. You massaged the spot for a few seconds, before looking up at them.

“Sorry.” They said simultaneously.

“Are you alright?” Danny chimed in.

“I’m good, just recovering from being shot twice.” You said with a blank face, just to see his reaction. He looked shocked to say the least. You laughed a little. “I was in Afghanistan not too long ago; a few things didn’t go as planned. The important thing is that we made it out alive and we completed our mission.”

“Oh, well I hope you heal quickly. Also thank you for your service.”

“Thank you, and it’s my honor to serve.”

“Maybe we will see you around here again before you have to leave.”

“That could be fun, but I’m hoping to be around for a while.”

“Awesome. I have to get back to work before Steve comes back, but it was nice to meet you Y/n.”

“You too Danny.” He walked away and you looked back to Chin and Kono. “So, how have you guys been?”

“We are good, but we want to hear about you. How long are you here for?”

“Well, I’m here for two weeks then I go to D.C. for a little while. Then I’m back for good-ish.”

“What does that mean? Are you leaving the marines?” they had confused looks on their faces.

“Not exactly.”

You explained your plan to them. Telling them nothing is set in stone. You were going to see how the two weeks go first before making a final decision. At this point after seeing them and your parents your mind was made up. You were going to transfer to the reserves, that way if you were really needed you could still help.

You talked to them for a while. You had gotten Chin and Kono to agree to come to dinner. You made them promise not to bring up your last mission. You didn’t tell your mother the full story because you knew she would be upset. Your father knew but he knows better than to tell her what happens out in the field. Even though on some level you knew your mother knew, she was a Marine and she knows what can happen.

Just as you were leaving you asked Chin about where you could get an application for HPD. He walked you back down to the main desk and asked the officer you talked to earlier for one. After getting it, you quickly filled it out and turned it back in. Chin had to go back to work, you said goodbye to him. As you were walking out of the Palace, you weren’t paying attention and accidently bumped into someone.

“I am so sorry! Are you okay?” You took a step back and looked up at the person.

“No, it was my fault, I wasn’t paying attention.” He looked down at you, pausing for a moment before extending his hand. “I’m Steve.”

“I’m Y/n.” You shook his hand. The two of you held on a little too long, before you broke the trance. “Umm, I’ glad you’re okay but I do have to get going.”

You let go if his hand and started moving around him. He just watched you walk away. You turned back to see him staring at you. He gave you a wave, you waved back, before proceeding to your truck.

You went to your hotel, checked in before going to your room. You sent a text to your boys to let them know that you made it to Hawaii in one piece. They all got back to you saying have a good time and stay safe. You made sure to hang up your uniform before taking a long-awaited shower. You just stood there washing away the day, you finally had a chance to really relax. After your shower you got dressed in jeans, a tank top and a flannel to top it all off. You grabbed your gun and placed it in its holster, you never went anywhere without it. Then you grabbed your backpack and your keys before heading out the door to your parents’ house.

When you pulled up in front of their house, you could see Kono’s car pulling up behind you. Chin was also with her; they got out of her car and came over to you.

“You ready for this?” Chin questioned when he was you fidgeting.

“Yeah, it’s just weird being here and not in some foreign country fighting for something.”

“It’s going to take some getting used to. I think its weirder to see you in normal clothes. I think I have only ever seen you in a uniform.” Kono and Chin let out a small laugh.

“I know.” You put your arm around Kono. “I am loving it; I feel so free.” You moved your arms around just to emphasize how free you felt.

“Are you guys just going to stand outside all night? Or are you going to come in and have dinner with us?” Your father called from the doorway.

“We are coming Dad.” You looked to your friends. “We better go before he locks that door.” You quickly moved towards the door with Kono and Chin close behind.

You stayed there for a few hours. Your father was asking for stories. Of course, you left certain details out, for your mother sanity. You asked Chin and Kono about Five-0. They told you all about it. Then they talked about the people they work with, their boss Steve McGarrett and how he was a Navy Seal. Then they talked about Danny who transferred here from New York to be closer to his daughter Grace. You told your parents that you had put in your application for HPD. Your father was excited for you. Once again, you could see your mothers head drop at the thought.

You spent a few more hours there talking and having a good time. When it started getting to late Chin Kono and yourself said your goodbyes. When you left the house, you walked them to Kono’s car.

“Well, that was fun.” You smiled at them.

“Yeah, it was. We should get together again before you go to D.C.” Chin said as he gave you a hug.

“Definitely.”

“We could invite Danny and Steve. Since you are trying to get a job at HPD, you will be seeing them every once in a while.” Kono gave you a long hug.

“Sure, that sounds good.” After that you said your goodbyes and left.

Once you arrived at your hotel, you put your gun in the drawer of the nightstand. Then proceed to get ready for bed. You change into a pair of shorts, leaving the tank top on. You grabbed your laptop and climbed into bed. You started looking for apartments and houses. You may have made your decision, but you still have a lot of things to consider and things to do.

You have found a few apartments and houses that you are willing to go see. At this point you were leaning more towards the apartments; just in case you are called back to duty. One of the few pluses of being in the Marines is that you traveled so much, which means you don’t have a lot of things. So, if you have to pack up and leave it is going to be easy for you.

After a few hours, you finally decided it was time to stop and try to get some sleep. You have a lot to do in the next few days. You turned off your laptop and set it on the bedside table. After making sure your alarms were set and your phone was plugged in, you laid down and slowly fell asleep.

@Ohana (Everything) Tags:

@camillyb @wanniiieeee @gurkiloni @fanfictionaddiction99

Series Tags:

@shipatheart @dannjulie

Steve McGarrett Tags:

@hails-halstead @healojane @summer-children @multiplecelebritycrushesat16

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golden-ariess · 3 years

Note

Would you rather be in debt to Tommy Shelby? Or be stalked by IT Steve?

You can't ask me things like this and expect me to be able to chose 😩. I would choose IT!Steve

Just imagine with me for a moment...

Email after email poured in. The moment you sifted through three of them sending replies back, ten more came and took their place.

Being understaffed piled even more work on your ever-growing checklist. The stress of it all began to chip away with you. All of it being more than normal. You stayed late, came in early, barely able to spare a moment for yourself.

It wasn't long until you decided to take a peak at Indeed to see if they had and current listing that fit your area of expertise.

By the time you caught up with work, Noon had been long gone and the ache in your stomach led you downstairs to find something to eat, even if it was just a short break.

________________

The week hadn't been kind to you, to say the least. Steve watched you trudge through the hallways. You looked exhausted. A large cup of coffee accompanied you throughout the day.

That wasn't you. His girl was stressed, and he didn't know how to help you beyond deleting emails you didn't need before you got to them.

Steve, for the first time in a while, felt helpless.

A soft ping alert from his desktop let him know you'd finally locked your computer and were inactive for the past five minutes.

He couldn't help but sigh in relief you'd taken a break.

Steve didn't waste time logging into your account. The least he could do was make sure emails had been sent and your inbox wasn't in disarray while you were gone.

Replying here, deleting there. He managed to knock a majority of your list out. Closing unnecessary tabs you had left open would only slow you down. He wanted you to get home as soon as you could tonight.

He hated the fact he hadn't been able to watch any of your favorite series with you lately.

Upon clicking away tab after tab. The last one he was to close out cause his blood pressure to rise. You were thinking of leaving.

This was the last thing he needed to see today. Unbeknownst to you, Steve had also found himself coming in and staying late, just as you did. You needed someone to lean on. Even if you didn't know, it was him gently holding you up in the ways he could.

He clicked his way through the jobs you had saved. Each one he saw you were overqualified for. This was desperation he was witnessing.

Steve knew if you left, he would simply follow. But Steve knew he couldn't handle being without you. There had to be something that could be done to make your department more barrable.

Clearing your browsing history as soon as he could, he finished up right before you logged back on.

Your manager was an ass who regularly wanted reports on messages that were sent between everyone in your department, and non work related things that were being looked up on company time using the companies equipment.

The last month while the department scrabbled. Barley meeting deadlines. He watched your boss sat back in his office playing online poker of all things on company time using the companies equipment.

The answer was obvious at that point. He has to go. Honestly, fresh new leadership was needed. Looking at the jobs you saved, Steve was sure your manager would land on his feet, eventually. The job market was open.

With a log he'd kept of all his search history. He had solid proof to send to the higher ups that suggested maybe your boss wasn't as invested as the company's growth as everyone else.

This is why I would choose Steve. He would take everyone down for me. Including capitalism. A man after my heart.

#s replies #I had to really give a good example as of to way #the lovely queenoftheworldisdead #💛💛💛#IT!Stalker Steve #dark!steve rogers x you

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bestworstcase · 4 years

Text

farran rereads lost lagoon: chapters 3-4

- a shot-put ball, according to my cursory research, weighs in the neighborhood of 6-16 pounds. leila howland expects me to believe that princess “hoisted an adult woman 70 ft into the air on the daily with nothing but a pulley and raw upper body strength” rapunzel has a hard time picking up a shot.

anyways

- rapunzel thinks about how she used to talk to herself in her tower when she was isolated (and lonely) but stopped once she came to corona, and this girl looked like she was talking to herself, and it gave rapunzel this weird sense of familiarity! now what in the world could that mean? its so subtle i can’t quite put my finger on it.

again, romance novel.

less sardonically - i will say that tts cass has never struck me as an especially lonely person. yes, rapunzel is quite possibly her first ever close friend, but cass also appears to be on pleasant terms with her coworkers and has at least one or two friendships or mentor-type relationships among the guards (stan and pete). animals in tts are anthropomorphized enough to qualify as humans, and cassandra is unequivocally friends with owl and fidella. she is friendly if not friends with at least one coronan citizen (monty). she’s utterly unfazed by crowley’s crabbiness. she’s able to get along with the pub thugs. in vardaros she befriends vex with ease and makes herself right at home among the citizenry at large. there is zero friction between her and lance - at most she rolls her eyes when he’s being ridiculous. and out of the main cast, cassandra is the one who seems closest to varian in s1 - like, she has actual bonding moments with him.

THE POINT BEING, cassandra may not have a lot of close friends, but she is nevertheless personable and demonstrates the ability to adapt herself to suit a variety of social environments. maybe i’m projecting here - i have very few close offline friends because my preference for in-person socialization is for it to be very casual - but taken together this doesn’t scream ‘lonely person’ to me. it instead says ‘person who finds social fulfillment in a wide net of friendly acquaintanceships’ and possibly also ‘person who finds close, emotionally intimate relationships worthwhile but very demanding to maintain, and so seldom or never seeks them out.’

this, absolutely, a very subjective reading of her character - it is just as plausible for cass to be someone who is socially competent but feels inwardly unfulfilled until rapunzel comes along. but even in that reading, this implication that cassandra is as deeply lonely, as thoroughly isolated in corona as rapunzel was in her tower is baldly absurd.

- i think i will have more thoughts about how arianna is characterized and the relationship she and rapunzel have with each other later in the story. for now it feels rather mechanical, and like arianna exists in the story to facilitate cassunzel happening.

- cassandra comes across to me like she has an anxiety disorder written by someone who doesn’t quite know how to convey how that feels? she catastrophizes: what if rapunzel thinks cass attacked her? will she get in trouble? but then she stops to make snide comments about rapunzel’s security detail ‘[falling] down on the job’ and concludes with an impressive amount of certainty that rapunzel isn’t going to make a big deal of it, after all. that… isn’t how anxiety works?

then, immediately, she finds a note from her father scolding her for slacking off—making it clear that she is indeed in trouble, like she feared—and her response is to scoff and throw it away. zero concern about being in trouble. zero worry about the consequences she might face for refusing the pointed “offer” of being rapunzel’s lady-in-waiting. like… this isn’t anxiety. i’m positive it’s meant to convey anxiety, but it comes across as cassandra just being… melodramatic and rude and grumpy. like a teenager. it’s unpleasant. and it bears very little resemblance to tts cass, who expresses a clear and consistent anxiety regarding the security of her job and the looming threat of a convent.

- secondly: “Friedborg reported that you missed your afternoon duties AGAIN. Please be advised that this is unacceptable. The queen is looking for a lady-in-waiting to serve Princess Rapunzel. It would be a great opportunity for you, and you must show the queen how prepared you are to train her in the ways of the court.” i am 100% convinced that howland thought cass was rapunzel’s age or younger. if friedborg is effectively cassandra’s direct supervisor, and she is reporting absences to cassandra’s father instead of addressing this with cassandra directly, the only explanation that makes sense is that cassandra is not of legal age.

- “Ladies don’t wield weapons, lead military strategy meetings, or race on horseback. Ladies do needlework, flower arranging, and hairstyling.”

sighs.

i am not going to argue that corona, in any incarnation, isn’t culturally sexist. it is. there are no women in the guard, no women in trades, no female business owners in the vein of monty or xavier or feldspar. besides rapunzel and arianna - who as the monarch’s spouse has very little in the way of actual political power - there are no women in the upper echelons of the government. besides cassandra, the only gnc women around are criminals. cass is denied even a chance to join the guard for no evident reason, even though her father allows eugene - a man he openly despises - to take the tests and then begrudgingly hires him when he passes. no one sees an issue with this, even though cassandra is demonstrably overqualified.

however.

howland makes this cultural sexism explicit text, and she does so in such a way that it implies something pretty horrifying about the already pretty horrifying corona-saporia unification backstory.

i am talking, of course, about general shampanier. you know, the female saporian general whom herz der sonne married when the two kingdoms were unified. the female saporian general who personally dueled der sonne for hours, according to under raps. the female saporian general who, forget military strategy meetings, led an entire goddamn army. i will accept the possibility that shampanier did not ride horses, because rapunzel’s return suggests that saporians have some sort of cultural objection to that. but this book predates rapunzel’s return by a large margin, and it isn’t canon anyway, so odds are the general shampanier of this story rode a warhorse at some point or another in her illustrious career of being the general of an army!!!

this woman - general shampanier - became the queen, the wife of arguably corona’s most historically important king, at a defining moment in coronan political and cultural history. tts and lost lagoon would both have us believe that this was a romantic, peaceful union between two people and two nations, but a few hundred years later - this. ladies don’t fight. ladies don’t belong in the war tent. ladies don’t ride horses. cass takes these things for granted as facts of life. but general shampanier did all of those things, and she did them extremely well, and she became corona’s queen.

WHAT HAPPENED?! WHAT HAPPENED TO SHAMPANIER’S LEGACY?

how did corona go from a warrior-queen to this, in just a few hundred years? the most plausible answer is that the background radiation of sexism and, perhaps, anti-saporian bias was powerful enough to unravel any cultural impact she may have otherwise had, deep enough to render her an outlier, an aberration, an exception to the rule that women do not act like that.

even arguing here that ‘lady’ specifically means ‘noblewoman’ doesn’t add up - because, again, general shampanier became THE QUEEN. you don’t get more noblewoman than that!

it feels unfair to judge this book with details added in season 3—such as the fact that shampanier is evidently not buried with herz der sonne—but this total lack of a cultural impact from general shampanier, queen of corona, feels very telling even without taking those tidbits of extra-textual information into consideration.

and good god, saporia hasn’t even properly entered the narrative yet! this is only the tip of the proverbial iceberg!

*deep breath*

moving. on.

- continuing the theme of cass being a child larping as a guard recruit: she has a closetful of weapons which she maintains to the exacting standards of the handbook, but skips out on her job to “train” in secret because evidently she’ll do ANYTHING to get on the guard except, you know, demonstrate a modicum of responsibility with the job she has now.

- moreover while i think cartography is a neat hobby for cassandra to have, it… doesn’t make a lot of sense if it’s part of some nebulous plan to ~prove herself worthy~ of being on the guard. like, cartography straight up isn’t a relevant skill, and while knowing the countryside could certainly be helpful for guard work in the event a criminal goes to ground in the wilderness, it’s like… it’s like if i applied for my current job, which is in software/tech support, by focusing an intensive amount of energy on teaching myself spanish. fluency in spanish is a useful skill and one that i could turn into an asset within the bounds of my current job, and it might be the deciding factor in me getting hired over someone else with equivalent experience and skill in computing and tech support (which is what the job involves) because, yes, some of our clients are ESL spanish-speakers. but it’s—there’s a disconnect. if i were in a tight competition to get this job i would be pouring my time into sharpening my programming skill and polishing up a portfolio of relevant work. i wouldn’t be devoting hours upon hours to learning spanish. right?

on the other hand—if cartography is a hobby cassandra is passionate about, and she’s 16 or 17 or 18 and she really likes the idea of being on the guard and really feels like she can do it and is bored with her dumb teenager job and desperate to get her dad to make her a guard without actually grasping what being a guard entails or the kind of work it involves or what she actually, realistically needs to do to have a shot, then… yeah, skipping work to play pretend with her weapons and convincing herself that her favorite hobby is totally going to prove to her dad that she’s ready to be a guard!!! makes perfect sense. it’s no different from tts varian tunnel visioning so hard on this fantasy of ‘i’ll surprise my whole village with hot running water and then my dad will be proud of me!!!’ that he neglects basic safety measures and accidentally blows the whole system up. it’s not realistic. it’s a fantasy. it’s play.

- the only time cassandra brings up eugene’s criminal past in tts is to mock him for being a loser. like. literally. the plot of fitzherbert pi kicks off when she calls him a “two-bit hood” and then when he fires back that flynn rider was a LEGEND!!! she fires back “key word being was. and… what is it you do now?” and that’s the only time she brings it up. granted this is 6-7 months into their relationship but… still, frankly i never got the impression that “former thief” was anywhere close to the top of cassandra’s list of reasons for hating eugene. he’s just a dick. she doesn’t like him because he’s a huge selfish jerk and she warms up to him after her starts behaving better.

- rapunzel goes to the ty lee school of flirting. just… laugh really hard at everything your crush says even if it’s not funny.

- despite my… intense and rapidly growing dislike for how cassandra is characterized in this book, her experiencing an actual physical reaction when rapunzel enters her space without permission is good. it’s about the boundaries. it has always been about the boundaries, and rapunzel crossing them, and the intractable messiness that arises from that.

- in fact: how many times does rapunzel cross boundaries in just this one little scene? oh, let me count the ways!

1 - when cassandra goes to shut the door, rapunzel ducks under her arm to enter the room. (eugene attempts to enter as well, but cass succeeds in blocking him.)

2 - missing or ignoring cassandra’s first “go away” hint about only playing individual sports.

3 - missing or ignoring cassandra’s second “go away” hint (“I let the silence get awkward.”)

4 - arranging cassandra’s invitation to the feast of elodie the great with the captain beforehand, so cass can’t use him as an excuse to decline.

5 - missing or ignoring cassandra’s obvious discomfort with this news, taking cassandra’s attendance at the feast as a done deal, and skipping straight to asking cassandra to sit next to her.

6 - in response to cassandra’s very diplomatic signal of not wanting to do that (“I sit wherever I’m assigned”), she declares that she’ll make sure cassandra is assigned to sit next to her.

7 - touching without permission, which makes cassandra flinch.

all of which results in cassandra making what she considers to be a “tactical surrender.” and then shutting and locking her door, because she feels so rattled. as i recall, lagoon is actually a lot mellower on the boundary violations front - and rapunzel actually learns better over the course of the story, which is probably the biggest reason that lost lagoon is not canon and cannot be canon to tts - but it feels worth writing this sort of thing out because, well. it is one of the dead horses i keep clobbering.

#lost lagoon reread #-cries in worldbuilding-#rta

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myveryownfanfiction · 4 years

Photo

“Dunder Mifflin, this is Erin.” The normal drone of the office played in the background and I fixed the spreadsheet that Dwight had sent over.

“Honestly Dwight. How did you mess up my client list so bad?” I looked over the top of my computer to see the man in question shrug. “Everyone is thrown all over the place.” My gaze fell back on the sheet. “For crying out loud!” I gently kicked Dwight’s desk while he looked at me with an innocent expression.

“What’s wrong now (Y/N)?” his voice gave away that he knew exactly what was wrong.

“I think you know exactly what is wrong Schrute.” I narrowed my eyes at him. Dwight just shrugged his shoulders and clearly bit back a laugh. “Why did you have to….” We were cut off by my phone ringing. “Hold up.”

“Hello! This is (Y/N). How can I help you with all your paper needs today?” I put on a fake voice while I narrowed my eyes at Dwight again as he got up and leaned over my desk. He swatted my hand as I tried to stop him from accessing my computer.

“I’m emailing it to myself so I can fix it.” Dwight whispered as he did what he said. “It was a prank. Jim thought it up.” I shooed him away as the voice on the other end of the phone finally responded.

“(Y/N)! It’s Jo.” The CEO of Sabre rarely called Scranton but if she did, it was important.

“Oh! Hi Jo! Good to hear from you!” I dropped the customer service voice I was using. “What can I help you with?” Dwight and Jim gave me a look. I responded with a confused look of my own.

“I just wanted to let you know that the new manager is coming in today. He’s going to need an assistant regional manager. After going over the possible candidates, I thought you would be perfect.” Jo explained.

“Thank you very much.” I said, my eyes widening at the news. “What do I need to do?”

“Basically what I want you to do for Robert California is what Dwight did for Michael.” Jo said. I chuckled and opened my mouth to respond but she cut me to it. “But better. Without all the problems and issues that occurred while Michael was there.” I nodded even though she couldn’t see me.

“Sounds good.” I noticed the pair of pranksters watching me so I asked for their benefit. “So it sounds like you went with Robert California after all.” Jim’s eyes went wide and Dwight looked between the two of us.

“Yeah. After all those other so called candidates he was the best candidate. Albeit a little overqualified.” Jo clarified. I nodded and watched as Jim let his head fall on his desk.

“When should he be here and is there anything I should do before he gets here?” I was rapidly scribbling on a notepad trying to get a bunch of questions for Dwight down before Jo told me it was a lost cause. We jumped as the door opened with a bang. “Nevermind Jo. He’s here. I’ll keep you updated. Bye.” I slowly hung up the phone before moving to stand up. “Mr. California! Welcome….” My hand hung in the air where I had held it out for him to shake. Robert California had turned around and walked out of the office after taking one look around the room. I ran to the conference room where I saw his car peeling out of the lot. I turned around and looked into the camera that had followed me and shook my head. I couldn’t form any words as I rushed back to my desk and dialed Jo’s number. “Jo?” I breathed when the phone was picked up.

“What’s wrong dear?” From her tone, I could tell that either she was concerned by the way I sounded or someone had already called to let her know that Robert California had left as soon as he arrived. “(Y/N)?” I snapped out of my thoughts as her voice carried through again.

“He left.” I choked out. “Robert California left. He walked in, saw Phyllis cough, and walked out. He just drove off. He left.” I was close to hyperventilating and I could see Pam trying to get the cameras away from me as I leaned over my desk, trying to catch my breath and keep my cool as I waited for Jo to respond. “Jo I don’t know what to do. He’s gone. I don’t know if he quit or is coming back or what. But he’s gone Jo.”

“(Y/N). Sweetheart. You need to calm down.” Jo’s calming voice came over the phone. “Where are you? In the office?”

“Yeah. My desk.” I breathed out. Dwight was already unlocking the door to Michael’s office. Somehow I knew that is always what it would be to me, no matter who occupied that space.

“Go to Michael’s old office. Lock the door. Call me back. You don’t need the whole office watching you right now.” Jo hung up and I quickly made my way through the door that Dwight was holding open. I nodded in thanks and quickly sat down to call her back. The call didn’t last that long and by the end of it, I had ushered Jim and Dwight into the office with me.

“It looks like one of us will have to take over until Jo can get out here and pick the new manager.” I said. “Well, not you Dwight. Sorry.” Jim shook his head as soon as I started talking.

“You’ll have to do it. I won’t. And Dwight can’t.” Jim held his hands up in defeat while Dwight nodded in agreement. “Don’t worry (Y/N). You can do this.” Jim put his hand on my shoulder. I watched in shock as they filed out of the office. Taking a deep breath, I stood up and walked into the main room.

“Can I have everyone’s attention?” I called out timidly. Everyone turned towards me and Pam gave me a thumbs up. “Since Robert California left and Jo needs time to get up here to figure out the new manager, she appointed me acting manager. Jim is the assistant manager.” I shot him a look that clearly said I was getting back at him. “Jo should be here by next week so you won’t have to put up with me for too long.”

“Does she have anyone in the running?” Andy spoke up. I turned towards him and shook my head.

“If she does, she didn’t tell me.” I told him. I turned back into Michael’s office, just catching Erin’s thumb’s up to Andy. I smiled as I sat at the desk and started to catch up on the work that was piling up without a manager. It was going on the third day when Jo called back. “Hi Jo! What’s up?”

“(Y/N), have Andy move into Michael’s office. He’s going to be taking over as manager.” Jo said. I could tell by her tone that there was more she wasn’t telling me.

“What is it Jo? There’s something you aren’t telling me.” I worried my bottom lip as I motioned for Dwight to get Andy.

“You know me too well darling.” Jo sighed. I held up a finger for Andy and furrowed my eyebrows. “It’s going to come out sooner or later so you might as well hear it from me.”

“Jo what happened?” I was becoming worried at this point.

“Robert California is now the CEO of Sabre.” Jo finally told me. My jaw dropped.

“He’s what?!” I exclaimed. “How did he convince YOU to give him your job?!”

“He’s very persuasive.” Jo muttered.

“How persuasive does someone have to be to give them your own job?” I was frantically trying to get the attention of Jim, Pam, and Dwight. Andy finally took pity on me and waved them in.

“Honey, I think you know.” Jo said nonchalantly. I ran my hand down my face while nodding.

“Yeah. I think I do know.” I muttered. I decided I was going to keep that little piece of information to myself. “So what happens now?”

“Andy takes over. Everything will run as usual.” Jo calmly explained. “Robert California will be there either later today or tomorrow. I’m not really sure when. He will become your go-between with the board. Anything you would normally go to me for, go to him.” I sighed and acknowledged the decision. “Don’t worry sweetie. I will be there if you ever need me. You have my number. Everything will work out.”

“I hope so Jo.” I shook my head. “I really hope so.”

“Good luck. Give the office my love.” Jo hung up and I let my head fall onto the desk. Finally composing myself, I stood up and offered the seat to Andy.

“You’re manager now Andy.” I applauded him as he took his seat. “Remember with great power comes great responsibility. Use it carefully.”

“So does that mean Jo made a decision?” Andy looked up at me. I bit my lip.

“Yes and no.” I tilted my head back and forth. I was trying to keep the information to myself but I knew I couldn’t. Everyone was looking at me expectedly. “Jo made a decision. But it wasn’t about the manager.”

“Then what decision did she make?” Pam asked. I sighed and hung my head.

“She decided that Robert California is going to be the new CEO and he will be operating out of Scranton.” I finally told them. “Jo thinks he should be here either today or tomorrow. And I’m guessing I’m still the assistant manager.” We stood in the office for a little while longer before we all went out to do our own work. True to Jo’s word, Robert California showed up about an hour before the day ended.

“Andy. (Y/N). Would you please join me in the conference room?” Andy and I shared a look as we sat down at the conference table. Robert took a seat across from me while Andy sat next to me. “Since this is a new experience for everyone, I thought it would be a good idea to get to know each other. Starting today, I will be alternating between having meetings with the two of you. I’ll start with (Y/N) and I’ll see you tomorrow morning Andy.” Robert stopped talking and waited for Andy to leave the room. It took him a while to get the hint but when he did, Andy gave me a sympathetic look before going out to join the rest of the office.

“So what are these meetings going to be about Mr. California?” I asked. I thought that if I kept it professional, I would get in his good graces quicker.

“Robert is fine.” He said as he stood to close the door that Andy had left open. I nodded as he took his seat again. My eyes flicked to the door before focusing on him again. “The first couple will just be getting to know each other. After that, it will most likely be about the effectiveness of the office and what can be done to improve sales, morale, and so on.” Robert pulled out a notebook, opened to a blank page and wrote my name across the top. I swallowed as I watched my name appear letter by letter.

“Sounds good.” I choked out. Robert threw me a smile before focusing on the paper again.

“So how long have you been working here at Dunder Mifflin?” The pen was poised above the page in an almost taunting gesture.

“I think it’s been about,” I paused in thought. “3 years now.” Robert wrote it down before looking up at me.

“That’s been a long time. Was this meant to be a permanent thing or just temporary?” He looked slightly amused by the thought.

“At first I thought it would be temporary as they weren’t really looking for someone to stick around but then they saw my sales reports and figured it would be a good idea to keep me around permanently.” I explained. “Which honestly is rather amusing if you think about it. Especially considering that there were people from Stanford that were supposed to stay here but ended up leaving.” Realization slowly dawned on me. “Which might explain why they kept me around.” Robert chuckled and I smiled as he jotted that down.

“Is this a place that you would like to continue to work?” Robert looked up at me. My mouth moved but no words were coming out. Robert sensed my shock and quickly held up a hand. “Oh! No. No. No. I’m not asking that to fire you later! I’m just curious. You said you worked here for three years. That’s a long time at one company. I’m just curious if this is something you would like to continue to do in your life or if you think there is something else out there for you.” I sighed as his words relaxed me.

“I’m sorry.” I apologized as I shook my head. “After all the calls with Jo and having to take on the role of manager for a while before finally becoming the assistant manager, I might be a touch…” I sing-songed my head, looking for the right word.

“Concerned?” Robert suggested. “Or would anxious be a better word?” I smiled softly at him.

“Anxious would be the perfect word thank you.” I cocked my head as Robert reached across the table to gently touch my hand.

“You have no reason to be anxious. Especially around me (Y/N).” Robert soothed. “I have all the faith in the world that you are going to be an amazing assistant manager. Especially since I am very certain Andy is not going to be much better than your previous manager.”

“You got to meet Michael Scott?” I questioned. Robert chuckled.

“No. Unfortunately I didn’t.” Robert patted my hand. “As much as I would have liked to have a conversation with him, I got all my information from Jo.” I nodded and started to reach towards my pocket.

“That actually makes sense.” I said as I pulled out my phone. “Okay. So there are actually two reasons for this.” I held up the phone.

“First. I have videos of the various things that Michael did here. Pretty much all of them are funny. A couple are sad. And the last one is actually his engagement because no one else thought that it would be a good idea to get it other than on the documentary.” I unlocked the phone and pulled up the videos. “Second. I have his phone number. If you ever want to talk to him, I can introduce the two of you.” Robert smiled as he took my phone.

“Oh dear.” He chuckled as he saw the thumbnail for the first video I queued up. “I take it, it is going to be very interesting.” I nodded as he motioned for me to take the seat next to him. Once seated, I pressed play on the phone. The remainder of our meeting was filled with the two of us watching videos of the office’s many shenanigans. When we exited the conference room, we were a little surprised to find everyone left. “We were in there for a while.” Robert muttered as he looked around the empty office.

“We should have kept a better track of the time.” I chuckled. Robert nodded as he went back into the conference room to gather his few belongings. I went to my desk and gathered up my stuff. I waited for him by reception. He joined me a couple of minutes later. We headed downstairs together in a comfortable silence.

“Do you need a ride?” Robert asked as we walked outside. I shook my head.

“Nah. I’m good.” I pointed at the Ford that was left in the lot. Robert nodded and started to head towards his car. “Nice car.” I smirked as I followed him. He looked at me astonished.

“You know cars?” he asked. I nodded.

“I know older ones better.” I shrugged. Robert chuckled and shook his head. “I still know this one is a great one though.”

“I’ll have to take you for a spin in it at some point.” We shared a smile as Robert got into his car. “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow (Y/N).” He waved as he drove off. I waved back and headed to my own car. Getting in, I sat there for a couple minutes before a smile made its way onto my face. Shaking my head, I pulled out of the lot and headed home.

“Maybe he won’t be that bad.” I said to myself. Giggling, I couldn’t deny the next thought that popped into my head. “Maybe I’ll take that chance if it arises.” When I got home, I went to bed happy and thinking of the man that had already wormed his way into my heart.

#james spader #james spader imagine #james spader fanfic #james spader fanfiction #james spader x reader #robert california #robert california x reader #robert california fanfic #robert california fanfiction #robert california imagine #the office #the office fanfic #the office fanfiction #the office imagine #the office x reader #dunder mifflin

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olicitysecretsanta · 5 years

Text

Love In An Elevator

For: Mirka @kuningatarmirka by @jennonthewire

Love In An Elevator

Another way Oliver and Felicity could have met, involving elevators and mistaken identity.

“Hi. I’m glad you could finally make it.”

One year earlier…

Felicity Smoak is having the kind of day that makes a person wish they’d never gotten out of bed. Overqualified for the grunt work she slogs through in IT at Merlyn Global, answering to a boss who’s so incompetent she can’t fathom how he even graduated college, and being the only woman in her entire department leaves her feeling less than stellar most days. But today is particularly awful, so much so that she grabbed her purse and walked out of her cubicle with no plans to return — which is how she now finds herself alone in the elevator at three twenty in the afternoon, several hours before she would normally clock out.

Leaning back against the cool metal of the elevator wall, she closes her eyes and tries to breathe deeply. Usually when she pictures abruptly quitting her job, it’s on the heels of telling off her boss and maybe programming his ringtone to elephant farts. She might still do that, actually.

Lost in thought, she doesn’t notice the elevator has stopped until a man steps in. He’s tall with broad shoulders snuggled into an impeccably fitted suit. She’s trying not to stare but it just can’t be helped. He flashes a polite smile then turns to face the door, and it’s a moment before she can tear her gaze away. He’s unfairly handsome. It’s stupid, really. No one should be that good-looking, and yet here he is.

“I love you.”

Did she just hear him right? Who tells random strangers they love them? Maybe he said ‘I love your shoes’ because her panda flats are really adorable or ‘I love ewes’ because he’s a big fan of sheep. Or what if this is some kind of time travel thing and he’s her husband from the future come back to replay their meet-cute? If she’s learned anything from years of Doctor Who watching, it’s that time is wibbly wobbly and anything is possible.

Except that this isn’t a TV show and she hasn’t said anything back, which feels rude? Maybe he’s just a guy who wants to spread happiness around. There’s nothing wrong with that.

“I love you, too.” The words are out of her mouth before she can stop herself, and she watches in utter horror as his back stiffens.

He turns to her slowly, lips pursed and eyebrows raised to the ceiling. She raises her hand in a little wave and tries to smile, but she stops midair when he also raises his hand and points to his ear.

And the Bluetooth he’s wearing.

Because he’s on the phone.

And not talking to her.

If the ground opened up and she fell through to another dimension, one where she hadn’t just told a complete stranger on an elevator who’s talking on the phone that she loves him, that’d be great.

When the elevator stops an eternity later, she’s out the door and through the lobby in a flash. She doesn’t even take a breath until she’s out on the sidewalk. Although now she’s unsure what to do as her car is in the parking garage, which is the level where she meant to get off but didn’t?, meaning she likely exited on the level Elevator Man chose, which means he could be around here somewhere.

Frack.

“Hi. I’m Oliver Queen.” The voice is smooth and soothing, and of course, belongs to Elevator Man. He’s likely trying to not startle the weirdo who just emotionally accosted him, and is now staring at him bug-eyed as if he’s a figment of her imagination. And maybe he is? Likely not, as the universe isn’t that kind to her today. Or ever, really.

Wait. Oliver Queen as in… Queen Consolidated. As in the C-E-fracking-O of Queen Consolidated! Frack, frack, double frack! Of course he’s Oliver Queen because her day literally could not get any worse.

“As I recall, you’re the one who told me you loved me. Can I really be all that bad?” Oliver Queen is standing in front of her, smiling.

Felicity closes her eyes tightly, realizing she’s just said all of that out loud and wishing she could teleport to anywhere but here.

“Yeah, you did.” Is he laughing at her?

“Are you laughing at me?” She jabs a finger into his chest. “Because listen, mister. I was just trying to not be rude. When someone says ‘I love you,’ the most obvious answer is ‘I love you, too.’ And frankly, I’ve had a really terrible day so sue me if my brain wasn’t exactly thinking clearly enough to contain my mouth.”

“I’m sorry,” he atones.

“Actually, don’t sue me. Please. I think I just quit my job and I can’t really afford attorney fees at the moment.”

She doesn’t realize he’s removed her finger from his chest and is holding her hand in a light grip until he says, “How about we start again? Hi, I’m Oliver Queen. And you are?”

“Felicity,” she replies, looking down at their clasped hands. Oliver moves to shake hers, “Smoak. Felicity Smoak. It’s nice to meet you.”

Oliver releases her hand with an easy smile. “Not so bad, right?”

“No, not so bad,” she teases back.

She immediately misses the feeling of his palm in hers, which is insane because he’s a complete stranger she just met and is also the best friend-slash-competitive rival of her boss’s boss’s boss’s boss’s son, Tommy Merlyn. Well, maybe ex-bosses now.

“Hmm?” She’s broken from her thoughts by his hand waving in front of her face.

“I asked if you wanted to get a cup of coffee. It seems like you could use one.” There’s that easy smile again.

She should say no. After all, she basically just quit her job and should get home to start planning her next steps. Rent doesn’t exactly pay itself.

But instead she surprises herself yet again. “Yes. Coffee would be nice.”

Felicity can’t say she’d ever imagined sitting across from Oliver Queen while drinking coffee, or that she’s thought about Oliver Queen that much at all.

But that’s exactly what’s been happening for the past three hours, as they’ve talked and shared and laughed. Oliver is an incredibly good listener. He never interrupts, just nods and asks thoughtful questions when she’s said something he doesn’t quite get.

“So, if working for someone else is ‘literally killing your soul,’ then why not work for yourself?”

“It’s not that I haven’t thought about it, Oliver. But starting your own company isn’t that easy. I have a small amount of savings that would probably cover the cost of branding and maybe advertising, but I’d be my only employee and my office space” — she air quotes — “would be the spare bedroom in my townhouse that you can’t currently see the floor of because it’s covered in spare computer parts.”

“People have started successful businesses with less, Felicity.”

She doesn’t think he understands what a risk it would be if it didn’t pan out, and tells him so.

“I don’t want to be offensive here, Oliver, but you’re a literal billionaire. You can afford to take risks with your money. I can’t.” Sitting back in her seat, she sips her second cup of coffee as a break in the conversation.

“Felicity.” Oliver leans forward slightly, elbows on the table. “I may not understand what it’s like to have money issues.” She snorts at that and he can’t help but smile a little. She’s charming him and she doesn’t even know it. “But I do know, very well, what it’s like to be in a job you hate — how much it takes from you, how hard you have to work just to keep your head above water.”

Placing her mug down carefully, she regards Oliver with a shrewd look that lets him know she’s figured out more than he may have been meaning to tell her.

“You don’t like being a CEO?”

It’s his turn to sip his coffee mindfully, deciding what feels comfortable to tell a stranger that also technically still works for your main competitor.

“I feel like I can trust you, Felicity.”

“What can I say? I just have one of those faces.” She’s hoping to lighten the sudden heaviness that’s taken over their conversation, but realizes quickly when his face falls that she’s said the wrong thing.

“Hey. You can trust me.” Felicity stretches her arm out across the table and turns her palm up, encouraging him. He takes her hand, and she squeezes softly.

“Thank you. And not really, no.” He shakes his head. “When my father died, there was just this assumption that I’d take over the company. My sister is still too young, although I think she’d make a much better CEO than I do. She’s ruthless,” he quips. Felicity smiles a little, and nods for him to continue.

“I’m not cut out for it. My dad used to bring me to QC when I was a kid. He’d sit me in his office, and I’d pretend to sign documents and give orders. It was some of the only time I got to spend with him. The company kept him away, and then so did his extracurriculars.” Oliver frowns heavily at that, and Felicity doesn’t have to ask to know exactly what he means.

“I don’t want to be my dad, Felicity. He worked himself to death, and when he was home, it wasn’t any better. My parents fought constantly, which was better than them not fighting because at least they weren’t ignoring each other completely.” He holds her hand a little tighter. “That’s not going to be me. But, the company needs someone to lead if for no other reason than to save the jobs of thousands of employees. I can’t make a different choice, not yet at least.”

“Thank you for telling me that, Oliver. I know it can’t be easy to talk about.”

He nods. “Easy with you, it seems.” The blush that creeps up her neck and onto her cheeks makes him smile.

“I feel the same way, which is kind of weird, right? Seeing as we just met?”

“I guess. Or… not.” He smiles and Felicity can’t help but smile back. “Felicity, would you like to go out to dinner with me?” “I don’t want to read too much into this, but are you asking me out on a date?” Her voice squeaks just a little. “Like an actual date? Like a date, date?”

“Well, sure uh…” he stumbles. “The implication being with dinner that you’d uh…”

“Usually I’m the one talking in sentence fragments,” she interrupts.

Oliver smiles then and huffs out a laugh before his face turns serious. “Felicity, would you like to go out to dinner with me?”

“What about your girlfriend?”

He pauses, “my what?”

“In the elevator earlier, you said ‘I love you’ to someone. I guess I just assumed —”

“Ah. That was my sister, Thea, on the phone earlier. She was trying to sweet talk me after her report card came in the mail. She’s seventeen and in danger of not graduating. I hired her a tutor, which she’s against.” He leans back in his chair, “but with those grades she’s out of options.”

“You’re a good brother, Oliver. She may not appreciate what you’re doing for her now, but she’ll thank you later when she’s walking across that stage to get her diploma.”

“I don’t need her thanks, but cooperation would be appreciated,” he laughs. “So, dinner?”

“Yes,” she nods, biting her lip to hold back the smile threatening to overtake her.

After her conversation with Oliver, Felicity goes home to crunch numbers and figure out just how she could make starting her own company work. She emails her resignation to Merlyn Global, and resists the urge to tell her boss exactly what she thinks of him, and then sets to registering her business name and applying for necessary licenses. Within a few days Smoak Tech is officially launched, from Felicity’s spare bedroom and with only one employee. But it’s everything, and she feels the universe is finally on her side.

She and Oliver talk regularly and still meet for coffee, at what’s now their usual place, more days than not, but they haven’t scheduled their date. If Felicity is honest with herself, the reason isn’t that she’s been too busy but rather that she’s purposefully avoiding the situation.

Oliver is kind and patient. He seems to get her despite them having known each other for only a few weeks. She tries to joke with him about her abandonment issues, make light of the situation so she doesn’t seem as broken as she feels. But Oliver isn’t having it.

“You don’t have to be funny for me,” he promises.

She sighs heavily. He really does get her.

“When I was a girl, I hated myself. I thought I was broken. That no one could, or ever would, love me.” She turns away then, feeling tears prick her eyelids. “It’s the only way a child could grow up when their father abandons them.”

Oliver is silent as she talks, but the space between them isn’t uncomfortable. He nods patiently, encouraging her.

“All I ever wanted to know was why, you know?” She swipes her fingers underneath her glasses hoping to save mascara from running down her face. “What was so wrong with me that he would leave?” “Felicity…”

“It’s okay, Oliver.” She smiles at him a little. “I don’t need you to make it better. I just wanted you to understand. I’ve already made a huge change in starting Smoak Tech and leaving a job that paid me, not to mention the health and dental benefits were excellent.” He chuckles at that and some of the tension leaves her body knowing he hears her. “I just… can’t start anything else new right now that I’d want to give my full attention to.” She leans over the table they’ve each come to think of as their spot and cups his cheek in one hand. “And I know that whatever this is between us deserves my full attention. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us now. Do you understand?”

He places his hand over hers, and leans into her palm just a little.

“I do. We can wait,” he starts. “Oliver, I can’t ask you to do that —” “Stop interrupting.” She folds her lips together and it earns her a smile. He removes her hand from his cheek, but doesn’t let go.

“You’re not asking, I’m offering. Let’s be friends. See where it goes.” He shrugs a little. “I like you, Felicity. I care about you. And I want you in my life. If you’re not ready for anything more than friendship that’s okay.” “What if I’m never ready?” she asks quietly.

“Then I’ll be happy to be your friend.” He’s so matter-of-fact in his answer that Felicity can’t help but be wary. It can’t be that easy.

“Except it is,” he challenges. When she blinks, he adds, “Out loud again.”

“Of course it was.” She rolls her head back and stares at the tin-lined ceiling. “I don’t want you to think I’m dangling maybes, Oliver.”

“Hey. Look at me.” He continues when he has her attention, “You’re not dangling anything.”

“So, we’re friends?”

“We are.” His mouth quirks just a little in that way he has that lets her know he’s amused by her. Felicity nods in acceptance, still holding his hand.

“Can we still go out for dinner, though? I’m really craving Italian.”

Over the course of a year, she and Oliver foster a friendship — one that becomes a cornerstone of her life in Starling. Building a start-up is exactly as hard as it sounds, some days even more so, and leaves her little time for herself let alone to nurture relationships. But Oliver is there anyway, supporting her from the sidelines. He reminds her to call her mother once a week, and cheerleads her into taking a weekend off to visit Barry and Iris: “They’re your best friends, Felicity, and you haven’t seen them in months. Smoak Tech might be an infant, but she can manage without her mom for two days. Trust me.”

Whether it’s bringing homemade lasagna to her office after hours because he knows she’s still there — “You can’t tell me you’ve eaten anything other than coffee and M&Ms because I won’t believe you” — or providing a listening ear at two in the afternoon or two in the morning — “You can always call me, Felicity” — he’s quickly become her best friend.

He’s the only person in her life who doesn’t make her feel guilty when she reads texts and forgets to reply, or drops off the grid for days at a time lost in perfecting some minute aspect of a security code she’s creating for her client. Instead, he reminds her gently to shower and sleep; and on the days she’s particularly tired and weary, offers up a foot rub and her favorite glass of red wine. They spend Sunday mornings at Oliver’s apartment where he prepares them brunch — “I like cooking for you”— a passion of his that Felicity wholeheartedly appreciates given her own lack of culinary prowess.

A few months after they meet, Thea is arrested for driving under the influence, and Felicity is the person Oliver calls to go with him to retrieve her from the police station in the middle of the night. She holds his hand on the car ride to the precinct, and reminds him to go easy on his sister — “She needs her big brother who loves her unconditionally more than a lecture right now.”

When Thea is given probation and mandatory community service, Felicity offers her an intern position and makes it her personal mission to help Thea find things she’s good at to invest her time in that don’t include shopping or partying.

Of course, the side effect of Thea working closely with Felicity is the opportunity for her to keenly observe just how her brother and his favorite blonde genius interact. After watching them dance around each other for what feels like years, she takes it upon herself to point out to Felicity what their “friendship” — “Yes, I’m using air quotes appropriately” — looks like from the outside, while they share dim sum she’s ordered in for lunch.

“You two know you’re dating, right? That’s what this is like, you’re not just friends.”

“Of course we are, Thea. Your brother is my best friend,” Felicity counters.

“Right, but you’re also in love with him.” Thea points a chopstick in Felicity’s direction, but in a subtle effort to avoid questioning is stuffing an entire dumpling in her mouth.

“It’s fine, you know. He’s in love with you, too,” she shrugs casually. “Anyone can see that… well, except maybe you.”

“I’m not in love with your brother, Thea,” Felicity tries, forcing the words from her mouth in a way that even she can admit doesn’t sound the least bit convincing. “Really,” Thea deadpans. “And that’s why you’re six different shades of red right now and I wouldn’t even be able to make out what you just said with that second dumpling you just stuffed in your mouth if I didn’t eat lunch with you every day.”

Felicity attempts a side eye that comes out more like a quizzical grimace.

“I’m going to take that look to mean you know I’m right.” Thea collects her take-out box and napkins before standing. “I’m not saying you have to do anything about it right this minute but…” Thea closes her eyes for a moment and when she looks at her again Felicity is struck by the sincerity she sees in her expression. “You and my brother. I don’t know. You just work. You’re smart and capable and you challenge him. He’s grumpy and annoying —” “I like to call that brooding,” Felicity interrupts.

“Yeah, that,” she snorts. They both share an eye roll at Oliver’s expense. “But he’s also happy. You make him happy. He trusts you, and you know Ollie so you also know how hard that is for him. He’s taken on a lot since Dad died and left him the company. He never wanted that.”

“I know he didn’t,” she mumbles quietly.

“Right,” Thea nods, “which just makes my point for me. He confides in you, relies on your opinion. You help him see there’s more to life than QC and responsibility. You’re his person, Felicity.”

She turns to leave then, not waiting for a response, but stops in the doorway. “I’m not saying you have to do anything about it. Ollie and I didn’t grow up with a great example of what a relationship should be so I know love stories don’t always end up happy.“

“Yeah, line forms behind me on that one.”

Thea’s smile is small but kind. “But we can’t let our parents’ mistakes influence our decisions, especially if it means we miss out on the possibility of love.”

Felicity purses her lips together as she regards her young protégé. “Thea Queen, when did you get so wise?”

“It’s a gift,” she responds with a shrug of her shoulder.

Felicity mulls over what Thea said on the drive home that night. Could Oliver be in love with her? She replays in her mind conversations she’s had with him over the past year.

If you ever need to tell someone about your day, you can tell me.

Is that judgment I’m hearing? Pride.

You’re not gonna lose me.

Thank you for always being on my side.

No other place I’d rather be.

I know who you are. You’re the man that I believe in.

Nothing worthwhile ever comes easy.

You’re remarkable.

It’s been a quiet dream she’s kept to herself all these months: of him feeling the same and their making a go of it — being in love and happy, having a partner to rely on, their own team of two. She’s not wanted to say out loud that she’s in love with Oliver. It’s felt too risky, made her too vulnerable, too fragile. What if it didn’t work out? She’d lose her best friend and the man she loves all at once. But when she looks toward the future, she can’t imagine it without him. He’s her always.

And she just wants a chance to be his.

He’d texted her earlier that day asking if she wanted to stop by for dinner, and she’d replied with a quick “We’ll see, hopefully yes,” but that was hours ago. Whatever he’d made for dinner was probably cold by now, and maybe he wouldn’t even be waiting for her still.

In what is the second impulsive life decision she’s made since meeting Oliver Queen, she makes a u-turn and rather than continuing on her drive home heads toward Oliver’s apartment. She doesn’t have a plan outside of tell Oliver you’re in love with him, which as far as plans go is not the best. Oliver deserves an entire monologue of all the ways she appreciates him, and just how much he means to her.

You’ve opened up my heart in a way I didn’t know was possible.

You’re always saying how you want me to be happy. The thing is, as long as you’re in my life I am.

I love every moment that I’m with you, no matter where we are.

We found ourselves in each other.

Love is too small a word.

The elevator ride to his floor feels like the longest of her life, and is incredibly ironic considering the last time she was in an elevator and told Oliver she loved him; back then, she was hoping the Hellmouth that’s very likely under Starling would open up and swallow her whole.

What a difference a year can make.

It’s the ding signaling she’s reached the penthouse that brings her back to the present, and directly across from Oliver’s door. She’s been here hundreds of times and never felt nervous, but now she’s concentrating on her breathing and making sure she puts one foot in front of the other.

“It’s now or never, Smoak,” she whispers to herself. “Go get your man.”

She raises a shaky hand to knock, but pulls back at the last second to take another calming breath. Closing her eyes tight, she raps against the wood in quick succession. It takes Oliver less than thirty seconds to answer the door, yet it feels like an eternity as every scenario of how this could go horribly wrong flies through her head.

“No,” she steels herself. “You deserve this.”

When the door opens, Oliver stands in front of her wearing that soft Henley she loves to steal on movie nights when she’s cold and those jeans that give her not-so-platonic thoughts every time he turns around. But it’s his socks that get her. He’s wearing the pair she picked up for him in the airport gift shop after her last visit home. The words Fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada are written across his toes, and she can’t help but grin.

Even when she’s not here, she’s with him. The smile on his face mirrors hers, and she takes his outstretched hand to lead her inside.

“Hi. I’m glad you could finally make it.”

#arrow #olicity #olicity secret santa #goodbye olicity #submission

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iamallyetnotatall · 5 years

Text

@spideypoolbingo 2020

Title: Personal Assistant Square: A1 - Personal Assistant Rating: PG13 (mild swearing, mild references to sex) Words: 1,667 Summary: Wade's hiring a new Personal Assistant. Unfortunately, his best applicant is also the hottest one.

AO3 or Keep Reading

"Alright, Josh-"

"Jeremy."

"The most important question. Dogs or cats?"

"Um... I'm sorry, Mr. Wilson, but I'm uncertain how this is relevant to the position?"

The young man, twenty-four or twenty-seven? - Wade's not keeping track - is tightly gripping the chair's armrests and his face and neck are red and sweaty from anxiety. His foot is tapping the carpeted floor and Wade had known instantly he wasn't going to hire this guy but decided to go through the motions anyway.

"It's relevant because I asked the question. Here at X-Force we take our interviews very seriously, and if you want to be a part of America's top choice for weapon engraving and blade design, I would suggest you answer wisely."

"I'm allergic to fur, sir. I have no preference between cats or dogs. I like fish; they're neat."

That won't do at all.

"Thank you for your time." Wade stands and holds out his hand.

Josh-Jeremy's hand is sweaty when he shakes it and Wade subtly wipes it on his pants as he sits back down.

"We'll be in touch," he lies and calls out to the receptionist outside his office. "Nessa!"

His office is three glass walls and a third-story window facing the abandoned building next door. He can clearly see Vanessa hang up her phone, probably talking to boytoy of the day and he wishes he were as sexually active as she is but everyone is so dull, and she rolls her eyes very pointedly in his direction. She comes up, opens his door, and ushers out the poor soul. He drops the resume and cover letter in his garbage can for someone to fish out later to put in the recycling.

He makes enough money from the front of his business and the stuff that happens behind closed doors to pay his staff well and no one complains about cleaning up after him.

The pile on his desk is getting smaller and smaller and he takes out the next one to look over before Vanessa sends them in.

'Peter B. Parker' is the name and that gets him a point already. He loves alliterations.

Masters in Physics, an internship with Doctor Octavius (before he went off about doomsday and tried to bomb Oscorp - even Wade knows about that and he steers clear of that side of the black market). Fluent in English and Spanish, a list of coding and various computer skills, and one very hot profile pic on Facebook. What this Peter person could want from a Personal Assistant job at a weapon engraving business is lost on Wade.

A smarty pants like this is way overqualified for boring paperwork, pushing pencils, and running his errands.

Wade is very excited to hire someone to do all the work he doesn't want to do so he can focus on the parts of his business that actually make him money.

"Boss, I have Peter Parker for you," Vanessa tells him through the little comm on his desk she insisted he install so she doesn't have to get up and see him. She mostly uses it to test out new pickup lines and to rehearse what to tell her mother when she asks why she isn't married yet.

"Send him in," he replies.

He closes the Facebook page and looks up. The applicant is nearing his glass box and hell. He's hotter in person.

There's a nerd aesthetic going on with the thick-rimmed glasses and the suit that doesn't quite fit right. His hair is slicked back and it's fluffing from humidity, his lips are bitten red and his blue eyes are wide and honest and a touch confident; he's delectable enough to eat whole.

Nessa doesn't bring him in, only points him in the right direction. Peter walks right in with a bright smile and stops in front of the desk. He leans forward and presents his hand to shake.

Wade stands and instantly knows he's in for one hell of a ride. Peter's eyes rake him up and down and that's all the confirmation Wade needs to know they're playing even. His eyes flick up with a slight hint of guilt from being caught, but his handshake is still firm. It's playtime.

"Hello, Mr. Parker. It's nice to meet you. I'm Wade Wilson. Please call me Wade."

"Thank you for having me."

Maybe later, he thinks. Hopefully later.

"Take a seat," he instructs and sits back in his plush leather chair. He crosses his legs and reaches out for his notepad. He sets it in his lap and taps his pink feathery pencil against the blank page. "My interviews are quick and to the point. I ask you a question, and you answer. Simple enough, right?"

"Yes, sir."

Being called 'sir' has never made his toes tingle quite like this. Should he have Nessa turn up the A/C? His office feels warmer than it was a few minutes ago.

"We'll start off easy. What's your favourite Disney movie?"

"Treasure Planet," Peter responds without hesitation.

Another point.

"Great choice. Best gaming console ever?"

"Gamecube."

Another point.

"If you were a pokemon, which one would you be?"

"Hm..." Peter pauses as he thinks and decides on, "Butterfree."

"I can see that."

Peter stares at him curiously as he writes on his paper, but he doesn't say anything and that's another point. Damn.

"Okay, what's your zodiac sign?"

"Leo," he says and asks with a cheeky smile, "does that make us compatible? In a work setting, of course."

"Of course," he agrees. "That makes us very compatible."

"I see." Peter's smile doesn't waver. His eyes move slightly down and Wade licks his lips without much thought.

He shouldn't be sending signals to a potential future employee. Fuck.

"Next," he stares at the page that doesn't actually hold any interview questions and tries to get inspiration that isn't 'favourite position' or 'are you into voyeurism because I want to bend you over this desk right now'. He's sure Vanessa would appreciate the show. "PC or Mac?"

"PC. And Starkphone, if that's further down the list of questions."

A point. Suppose he can make it a point and a half.

"Rank the Golden Girls from best to worst."

"Oh." Peter's eyes widen, finally stumped. His smile turns sheepish, "I'm sorry, but I'm not very familiar with the show."

Wade tsks and shakes his head, pen gliding on his notepad, "And you were so close to perfect."

Peter laughs, hand moving to cover his mouth in some semblance of insecurity and Wade wands to move it and replace it with his lips. Or any number of things, honestly.

"It was a trick question anyway. Dorothy is the best and the other three are tied for second."

"I'll take your word for it."

"Last question, and this one's most important. You ready?"

"Go for it."

"What's your Hogwarts house?"

"I'm a proud Hufflepuff."

"Is that Pottermore or some Buzzfeed bullshit?"

"Pottermore," Peter says with laughter in his words.

Wade knows deep down that X-Force, and its real work, are not fit for any Hufflepuff. He stares down at his notepad and also knows that Peter is crazy qualified for most things including a PA job and would do it really damn well. The cutie's quick and fun and his smile is nice and he'd fit in well among his assortment of oddballs.

"Oh, suppose I should ask. Dogs or cats?"

"This might be a dealbreaker, but I have to be honest. I'm one of those weirdos with no preference. I think they're both adorable."

"You can get half a point for that," Wade says.

"Is that how this works? A point system?"

"Only the best from X-Force."

At this point, he doesn't know if the points are for employability or fuckability and his body is very confused about it.

"And my Patronus is a wild rabbit."

"Cute." Wade sets down his pen and leans back in his seat. "Alright, let's get real. We've got two options here, and it's up to you how we proceed."

"Okay..." Peter hesitantly agrees.

"First option. You're obviously way overqualified, and I have no idea why you'd even apply for a PA job, but I frankly don't care enough to ask for your life story. Of all the candidates I've interviewed today, you're the best for the role. It's yours if you want it."

"What's option two?" Peter asks. His eyes wander and Wade swallows thickly.

"You can take option one and that's that," Wade offers an out, but Peter isn't deterred.

"I want to know about option two."

"I don't fuck my employees," Wade says plainly. "I'm DTF and I think you might be too, so if you want to go that route I'm super into it but I won't hire you. If you want the job, I can be professional, but if you're having second thoughts... well."

"I have an interview tomorrow for something a bit more in my field, and I mostly just applied to get my Aunt off my back about getting a new job after all that stuff with Dr. Octavius. Um." Peter's hand lifts from his lap and he points vaguely toward the doorway, "Also because I live like two blocks away. If you wanted to, uh, know that."

It's incredibly not subtle but Wade's entire body warms at the clear invitation. His suit's getting stuffy and a bit tighter than it was earlier. There's still five hours to his workday but fuck it.

The two men stare at each other for a silent minute as if this is even a debate.

Wade stands and sets down the notepad, "No time like the present and all that BS, right?"

Peter smiles brightly and it makes his eyes shine and Wade has a desperate need to hear that voice moan his name. He follows Wade's lead and stands too, "Agreed." He glances down at the notepad and can only laugh.

The page only consists of a drawn unicorn surrounded by flowers.

#i went super original with a title #womp #spideypoolbingo2020 #spideypool #peter parker #wade wilson #no powers AU #vanessa carlysle #may parker #mentioned #personal assistant #fic #mine

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nickhembery · 5 years

Text

trigger warning: shit gets dark

I've been thinking about writing this for a while. It's going to be a long one, because it's going to tell a story of a long period in my life. It's going to get into a lot of banality of office work, and its going to go to some dark places, because it's also the story of depression. My depression. My sink into some pretty dark thoughts and the path out of them.

The story starts in 2007. I was a year out of university with a degree barely worth the paper it's printed on, so was struggling to find a job. A task made a lot harder because I still didn't have any idea what I wanted to do for a career. So I was going from short temp job to short temp job, feeling kind of down. When one day I get a text from an agency that had given me a few jobs. "Want to be working Monday?" I think it said. I replied in the affirmative. I was given an address and told to be there at 8.30am on Monday. I said I would be there.

The company I had just agreed to work at was at the time a freshly independent arm of Zurich bank. It operated in a very niche area of financial services. When you want to get a mortgage, insurance, or some other financial thing, you can go to a bank. Or you could pay someone else to go to the banks and find the best deal for you. These people are called financial advisers, they go and talk to random people and convince them to act as intermediaries to the bank, and doing this they earn commission. This commission can vary, unless they are part of a large group, not quite a union, of similar advisers that can collectively bargain better commission rates for the advisers. That's what this company was, an intermediary for an intermediary, a company that only dealt with other companies and to the public at large is invisible.

My job at the company was quite simple. When the financial advisers sell things, they earn commission, that commission comes from the bank, goes through the company, and on to the adviser, except when the computer system failed to process it. My task was to look at these system failures, figure out why they failed, get them working again and the money passed on to the adviser. It sounds quite slick when you say it like that, except it was monotonous, easy and boring. There were only actually about six reasons that a payment failed to process automatically, and quite quickly you got good at spotting what the cause was with just a glance at the data. From there, it was simply a case of following the steps and pushing buttons in the right order to get things moving again. After that, you moved onto the next payment in your list of payments to deal with. Because there was always more.

That, in a nutshell, was my job. The digital equivalent of the old-timey footage of the factory worker doing the same thing over and over. I was there to correct a failure in an automatic process, and at any time could be made redundant when they figure out how to stop it happening. But this is where things take a dark turn. I was never made redundant. In all the time I was at the company, no one ever changed the system in an effort to effect the automatic processing. It was easier for the company to employ me, and a lot of other people, to push the buttons in the correct order, than it was to get someone to actually fix the system. That's a heavy thing to carry with you. You're not worth enough to be a saving if you're made redundant. So you sit there, working your tools on the conveyor line.

Let's talk about the tools for a minute. Those didn't change much in my tenure either. The thing the advisers used to send us information about the things they sold changed twice. It started they were using paper. Then a digital system was built over a few years by many, many contractors. But it basically didn't work, so was scrapped and replaced in about two years after launch. There was one particular time when £10,000 had been spent on a button that would stop some errors happening. It didn't work, so we saw no difference. The thing that all our records of payments were stored on was excel spreadsheets. Thousands upon thousands of records per sheet, switched out monthly. We were using it like a database table. Information was constantly being entered and changed, by multiple people at once. So it broke a lot. You'd try to save changes and you'd get an error message. The source file was corrupted, or deleted. When that happened there was a twenty-minute procedure to fix things and get back on track. It happened at least once a month. IT apparently spent a long time trying to solve it. One time they announced they had solved the problem, and while they had, they also caused an even worse problem, so I demanded we be rolled back immediately. We were rolled back after the second instance. The last tool we had was the main database and payments system. Every record on the spreadsheet already existed on the payments system, but there was no way to retrieve records in the filtered form we needed on the fly. So we went between the spreadsheet and the payments system, sorting things out and amending data. The payments system in a word, sucked. It crashed four times a day and you had to reset it on your computer. Once a month it went down for the whole company for about an hour. Imagine you're typing an email, you hit send and you get an error message. You restart your email client and it doesn't want to open. You ask the person next to you to check their email, theirs is broke too. You ask around, no email for anyone. Then someone has to call IT and report that email is down. Then you wait, and no one can do anything without email. Every month, the tools we relied one would break down and we had to wait for them to be fixed. And neither of those was changed.

One more thing to talk about in the structure of the job. Crunch time. You ever have a big deadline, where a lot of work needs to be done in a short space of time so everyone has to put in extra hours? And it's really important so everyone is expected to come in and help out, because you have to hit that target? How often does that happen for you? In this job, there was one every single month. I mentioned the spreadsheets were swapped out monthly. That's because our cycle of work was on a monthly pay run cycle. Everything that came in during the month was processed in the same month. Well, mostly. 99% was the average. And you'd think okay, so you see what you get at the start, figure out how many then work to the speed so you're done at the end, right? Wrong. Stuff keeps coming in throughout the month, and all of it has to be done. This includes the mammoth file that comes in three to five days before the deadline, and is equivalent in size to half of all of what you've done in the month to that point. Three days to process thousands more payments. And this was routine. Every month, the file lands and everyone gets to work on it. The spreadsheet and system crashes frequently happened during these periods. One time the bosses did trial offsetting the mammoth file to the following month so there wouldn't be crunch for us. But the bosses upstairs didn't like it, so it was put back. A crunch period. Every single month. It's worth pointing out that this was my first proper job, so I didn't actually know this was abnormal. So I just got on with it.

So this is all pretty sad. The work is easy to the point of mind-numbing boredom. The tools break frequently. Nothing is being done to make things better. Periods of high stress all the time. What do you do? You try to leave. Except. I was hired as a temp in July 2007. Made permanent in late 2008. Then the financial crises happened. No one was getting out. Every job advertised was crap or worse. It was a while before it was worth job hunting seriously again. And that didn't go well. At one point I talked to a career's adviser because as I put it "the phone doesn't ring", no one was interested in me. I was overqualified for the crap and underqualified for everything else. Trapped. Doing the same crap, over and over, in a monthly cycle, over and over. I had already identified and openly talked about how I disliked the job. I described myself as a professional button pusher. Or, bored office worker by day, insane video gamer by night. Or, everything positive in my life is outside of work.

The positive things. They were there. I had met a group of friends that are still with me today. My family were and still are incredibly supportive of me. I travelled, going to various events and seeing strange sights. And I found the thing I wanted to really do for a career. In 2011 I was a founding member of a writing group in which we all read and critiqued each other's work. And while I could be cutting in my comments, I was honest and very good at it. And I enjoyed it. Pursuing that, I looked into how to do it for a job. It's very tough when you're not ten years younger than I was, doing or done an English degree at a better university than I went to, or just had decent connections in the industry (that I didn't have). So, freelance work. What a mess that is. Various websites offer connecting freelancers to customers, but those are fiercely competitive, to the point that it's a race to the bottom, working virtually for free, if you find work at all. The freelance market is a full-time job to find part-time work. Not fun. Something I started doing was seeking out courses on proofreading in order to boost my profile. And this is when things get very, very dark.

In 2014 I received the results of my third (I think, it might have been second) attempt at one of these courses, and I didn't make the cut. Feeling sad and not having anything else to do that day, I went out to the gym. Driving along a dual carriageway, I noticed that there wasn't a barrier in the grass verge between the opposing lanes. I thought about veering across and causing a head-on collision. What stopped me was the thought "no, that's really rude to the other driver". The thing about low-burning anxiety is that you're constantly afraid of strangers. What if they attack me? What if he tries to mug me? What if that bus jumps the curb and hits me? All of these things are imagined external threats. This thought of veering my car was the first time it would be me causing the damage, so it flagged immediately as something that shouldn't be there. In a bit of a daze I continued to the gym, worked out for a bit then went home. When I arrived I switched my computer on and googled "depression test". I found seven online tests on various sites, and did all of them. The results across the board, were that I was seriously depressed. I sat back, and thought about this for a moment. Then I thought that the suicidal thought incident probably triggers a thing in them for maximum safety. Anyone that thinks of killing themselves is automatically told to seek help. So I did all the tests again, and this time I left out the suicidal thought bit and lied a little for good measure, saying I wasn't as bad as I really felt. The results were the same. Heavy depression. Get help.

I quickly arranged an appointment with a doctor, got a prescription for anti-depressants and various reading material. At the time I was struggling to read for long periods, my attention wasn't holding, so I got a couple of audiobooks on depression and low self-esteem. I figured there was a lot of overlap. I also met with a therapist, and attended a seminar series to talk about my issues. The cause of this sadness was immediately obvious. The job. But, I couldn't quit. When I had met with the career's adviser a few years previous, the same one that I had told "the phone doesn't ring", I had asked about quitting so that I could become 'immediately available' as some ads requested. He advised me against it, stating that those currently in work were 40% more likely to find new work. The logic is there, you're proving that someone wants to hire you, so the new people should too. Though I sometimes wonder on the accuracy of the figure. But what to do when the job gives you depression and you can't quit? I decided to give myself six months to learn about my condition and let the medication kick in, then start job searching with a seriousness hitherto unseen. I have no idea if I just used 'hitherto' correctly. Anyway, learning.

How does depression work, and how do you cope with it? In reading (listening) and talking, I learned about various coping mechanisms, and that somehow I'd done everything right. It was part of how the job was so identifiable as the cause. I didn't do anything other than the job that didn't give me happiness, reward or satisfaction. Like going to the gym. That started because I was feeling pains in my arms and shoulders from lack of exercise, so I joined up to make that go away. Exercising is highly recommended to depressives because of all the endorphins. Another was staying up late. Lying awake in bed is classic bad thoughts time, so I avoided it as much as possible. I would stay up on the computer until the early hours, then I would climb into bed and play a different game, keeping going with that until I was almost passed out from exhaustion. Only then would I switch everything off and go to sleep. It wasn't healthy, but it kept the bad thoughts at bay. Living with other people also helped greatly. They could keep an eye on you, make meals so that you actually ate, and be someone to pretend to be normal for. One time I was alone in the house for a while, and it took me three hours to get out of bed, wash and dress. Wouldn't have got away with that if anyone else had been home and needed to use the toilet. But the most important mechanism by far, was the first one.

Most people when they work listen to music. A radio is the classic. These days it’s youtube or spotify. But I didn't listen to music, because it wasn't enough of a distraction. I could do my job, listen to music and daydream at the same time. And they weren't good daydreams. So I listened to podcasts and audiobooks. Thousands upon thousands of hours, I heard quiz shows, tech news, movie reviews, historic stories, short stories, random rants and books and books and books. I didn't talk to my colleagues much. I would arrive, switch on my PC, plug in my headphones, and be silent for most of the day. I didn't like saying good morning to people, I can't recall why, and I thought it would be horrible if all I said to people was goodbye, so I didn't engage them unless absolutely necessary. Sometime people ask how I could work and listen to spoken word at the same time. I always equated it to driving and listening to the radio. I was looking at shapes (numbers) and hearing words. I kept the two separate in my head and kept going. If I had to write an email I would pause the audio. Needless to say, with all the silence, I wasn't popular. I didn't care. I really didn't want to be there, so I did my best to pretend I wasn't.

Slight tangent, how often does the phone ring at your work? Once a day? Once a week? Several times a day? Well, when I started at the job the phone would ring a lot. Because as well as being the correction mechanism for the automatic system, we were also the second line support for the contact centre. A payment would go wrong, an adviser would call up, the person they reach wouldn't know anything about it, so they would call us. Again and again. And these were important calls, our customers the advisers couldn't just be ignored, no. So there always had to be someone to answer the phone, which meant everyone couldn't be on lunch at the same time, which in turn meant that everyone had a set period when they went to lunch. From twelve till one or one till two. The team was split down the middle. You left on the dot and you were back on the dot. Annoying, but also strangely fortuitous. Because it gave me a set period every day of non work. Where I could leave and partake of another activity. Some people went for walks, or read a book. Me, I wrote. Many thousands of words. Then I edited. Then other stuff, I'll get back to that later. The 'wrong' part about this rigidness was that unlike my job, things changed for the contact centre. What was once six people and no clue was grown to twenty who were well trained and knew their stuff. My phone stopped ringing. They didn't need us anymore, but the rigid lunch times stayed. I wonder why. Anyway, the writing I did in my lunch breaks was a great coping mechanism, gave me a massive sense of accomplishment. "What did you do at work today?" "I wrote 1000 words" In my lunch break.

That was all stuff I was doing by accident when I was diagnosed. After the six month to learn and let the meds kick in, I really got going. It was here that I started my annual goal setting, which has featured heavily in the blog before. "In the coming year I will X, Y and Z". I wrote many drafts of books. I learned to touch type. I learned how to animate. I tried several times to learn how to code. I tried and failed and tried some more. But the big thing was that I put on the list was to get a new job. And here is why it took so long to come off anti-depressants and declare myself well: job searching is hard. You write a CV, you search for jobs in your area, you put in applications for every one you think you could get, and you wait. Every day, searching, writing, applying. I also signed on with almost every job agency in the area. For the most part the experience was the same, you go in, fill out forms, sign up, lots of smiles and handshakes, you leave, you never hear from the agency again. Attempts to contact them are ignored or brushed off. There's a couple specific stories to tell here. One agency approached me and asked me to sign up, I happened to have a day when I could come in as I was also going to the dentist. I told them what time I would drop by and to let me know if that wasn't good. The day came, I drove over, got buzzed through the door, sat in the reception area, and waited. For an hour. I went back outside, got on the intercom again and was buzzed inside again. This time someone turned up and told me politely that she couldn't help me as she oversaw a different area, the person I was there to see was busy, and they also don't take walk ins, so please leave. I left. At half past four that afternoon I got an email from the contact saying sorry but they don't have time that day, is there another time I'm available. I did not reply. Another story. One time after applying I got a call, it was from the agency that listed the ad. They had me on file, I had signed on with them two years previous, but could I please come in and sign on again. I replied that none of my information had changed, and I had never actually left the agency's rolls, so why did I need to sign on again? She agreed and ended the call. I never heard from them again. To this day I am confused as to what people who work in job agencies actually do.

Back to my search. Every day I checked a few different websites and applied for whatever I had a shot at. When you do this everyday, you're effectively staying current in the market, seeing stuff the same day it's posted and you can skip the things you've seen before. The upside of this is that you're not wasting time on old listings that already have lots of applications. The downside is you see how few jobs are being posted day to day. But still, you apply, and you actually get results. People call you and invite you in to interview. Things get more frustrating than when dealing with agencies. You get a date, time and location. You make arrangements, put on your suit, show up. You smile, you shake hands, you answer their questions. They say thank you and goodbye. It's some time until you hear from them, or from a representative. The answer is always no. The reason for why it's no is rarely there. Occasionally you get told that one of the other candidates was better in some way, which is understandable. The rest of the time, nothing to tell you why. One time I got the call that I hadn't been selected, and when I asked why they said "client suitability". I asked what that meant, they replied that I didn't tick all the boxes that they wanted. I asked which boxes were lacking. We went round and round a little until I backed them into a corner, and they admitted that they didn't know why I wasn't chosen. I just about held back from asking why the fuck they bothered to call. Just.

After about two years of searching, applications, rare interviews, no feedback, I decided to do something about it. I got in touch with careers advisers again and they forwarded me to a local office where I could be given a mock interview. I wanted to know why I was being told no all the time, and I was determined to get an answer. The nice group sent me a list of questions ahead of time to make prepared answers for, which was good. On the day I suited up, went along and we sat down. The questions were all generic, as they couldn't do an interview for a specific job. It was all about my skills, what I could bring to the table, my goals. I answered everything as best I could. The mock interview ended and I asked what I'm doing wrong. I was told "that was great, I'd hire you on the spot". I think that's the worst bit of feedback I've ever received. No advice or ideas on why I wasn't being selected. The best they could offer me was to flat out ask how I did on the day to get immediate feedback.

We're into the final stretch now. The last year at the bad job. I didn't know it yet of course, I was still getting rejected all the time and had days when I felt I could lie down on the floor of the office and go to sleep in the middle of the day. It's worth noting this period because things got a little better, and they also got worse. What to go over first. How about promotions? The entire time I worked at the company, I was not promoted. I was the same grade the day I left as the day I was made permanent staff. The way to get promoted and the raise that goes with it was to make your boss like you. That's a bit difficult when you're unsociable, depressed, and your immediate superior is an idiot you refuse to talk to. Really, on paper she was my manager and was responsible for my annual assessments. In practice, her boss handled those for me and I refused to go back. So no promotion for me. It was promised by the CEO in that last year that the company would formalise the way to get promoted. You don't need to be liked if you're good at what you do, I think. That method was yet to be published when I left, likely because there was so many people that could rightly kick up a fuss at being passed over in the past. So there's that. Next, bonuses. The company, when it was formed, was an offshoot of Zurich as I said. Being a limited company, there were shares available that could only be held by certain people, including employees. These shares were allocated out to the staff as bonuses each year on the reason that one day the company would be sold and everyone would get a big payout. Well, in my last year with the company, it was announced that these shares actually had an expiry date. Ten years after allocation, if the company wasn't sold then the shares were void. All that promise of a payout evaporated. The company wasn't going to sell, the plan was to go public. But, bonuses for the staff. What to do instead? Well, they instituted a "long term incentive plan", where on four-year cycles staff would be given a moderate payout by the company. The first cycle would start the following year, and as a reward to all the staff that had been with company for a decade already, they would be getting *slightly* more than people who had joined yesterday. No one cheered. Related to bonuses, annual raises. Inflation is real, you need to keep pay going with it. But how much? That is what the annual appraisal determines. For a long time you were given a score out of 150. Most people got 85-95. Reasonable. It got you a modest bump in pay. In the last year, the system was changed to grading out out of five. Not five hundred, five. The lowest you could get was a one. Things got a bit more black and white. And, I was given a two. Not because I had actually done badly, but because I wasn't fulfilling my potential, apparently. No, I don't know what that could look like. So a few months later (after the boss' boss had changed) when everyone was getting letters about how much they were getting extra, I didn't get a letter. That two cost me all possibility of a raise. That grates. What grates more is that also in that last year a new guy was hired to the team who had no more responsibility than me, but was hired to a the upper grade (with the extra money). Similar to the money situation, was the wellbeing situation. Every year the company ran a survey to see how the staff felt things were going. Every year I filled it out and told them how miserable I was. In the last year, it turned out that everyone in my team had filled out the survey to similar effect. 40 people who all worked together weren't happy with their lot. So one day we were excused from normal duties (button pushing) and taken next door to a hotel to sit in a conference room and talk. We were shown graphics of our survey results and asked what could be done to improve those scores. What weren't we happy about? What could be changed? Being someone who had given this a lot of thought, I was able to answer. I spoke of all the problems, the unmoving, the boredom, the being ignored. And after that day, nothing changed. I sometimes wonder if anything ever did. By far, the strangest story of that last year is when I was asked to train a new hire. I didn't want to, but the bosses insisted. What's strange about this is that the person exposed a flaw in the hiring system. They were a simpleton. I taught them the basics of how spreadsheets worked, once answered a question with "you asked me that yesterday and wrote down what I told you", and I corrected their work again and again. It would be called amazing if it wasn't tragic. The job that was so easy and boring it gave me depression, was too hard for this person. Eventually, an excuse was found to fire them. And new hires after that described tests they took before being taken on.

The incredible thing about this entire journey, is that I don't remember the most important part. The day I applied for my current job. I can't remember seeing the ad, or filling out a form, or writing an email. That single, critical moment that would see my life change is missing from my memory. It was the job hunt of course. Searching every day, the phone ringing occasionally, always being told no, what's the point of remembering a single application? So I didn't. And it was a surprise when the phone rang to invite me for an interview. Naturally, I suited up and went along. I remember the clock on the wall over the interviewers' shoulders. I remember finding a fleck of white in the glass of water I had been given and looking up to see if the paint was peeling off the ceiling. I can't really remember the questions. I can remember when my car stopped on the drive home. The battery had died, I had to get a jump start to get home then order a replacement. Aside from the car trouble, it was just another interview. So it was a greater surprise when I got the call about the second interview. When I went along, one of the people I had met the first time remembered me and said hi. I was shocked, I also didn't remember them. I met the people that are now my bosses and spoke to them. I recall near the end I asked the 'how did I do?' question, and expected to get a non-answer. I was told that so long as I did well on the test then I had it in the bag. Okay then, more pressure please. They had told me about the test beforehand, and I brought along my own pens for it. One day, I hope to interview an assistant or replacement proofreader, and I'll ask to see what pens they brought. By far, the biggest shock was when I got that phone call, and was told I had the job. I can't recall exactly what I said, but I doubted that it was real, wanted to know if they were sure, something like that. After that call, I had to collect my thoughts and hold back from bursting into tears. I went back to my desk and immediately handed in my notice. It was within two days either way of eleven years after I had started at 8.30am on a Monday.

The month of my notice was an epilogue. Word spread that I was leaving. I smiled more than I ever had. People asked how I'd gotten the job, I told them about the journey. No one asked me if I was sure, I was the guy that said "I would love to be made redundant". But there was the meeting. In the larger team of 40, I was in a pod of eight. We all worked on the same stuff. This pod included the guy who was hired to be above me, and the idiot boss. A few days before the meeting, she asked me if there was anything I did that I thought other people would need to take care of when I wasn't there. I had a list. I wrote it down, and this list was put onto the agenda for the meeting. They were going to hear about all the busywork I did when there was nothing else to do that was actually really productive. On the day, we stood and left our desks to go to the meeting, the boss turns to me and asked me to take the minutes of the meeting. I told her that as I was doing the explaining and handover, I was going to be doing a lot of talking. She said, and I kid you not, "But last time you did the minutes it was really funny". I put my foot down and refused. In the meeting, no one quite believed what I was doing when they weren't watching me. The small things that kept everything moving. Keeping a spreadsheet updated. Pushing a button off and on each day. Checking for data entry errors. The majority of this work went to the grade-above guy. Finally, the day came. I left on a Friday. The following Monday I did my new commute to the new office, with new people and new work. I try not to look back, to get angry. But things keep bubbling up, so I thought I would write it all down here.

I have to recognise through all of this how lucky I was. Friends and family were there to support me. I had the resources to maintain my coping mechanisms. I caught the problem before it became an issue big enough to interfere with my work. I live in a time of the Internet that I could search for a phrase like "depression test" and find free resources. I live in a country with free healthcare, so saw doctors, pharmacists and therapists for no cost. That same country has subsidised medicine, so for the same cost (less then £9) as any other prescription, I got custom-made bottles with enough liquid to last a month. I was given a medication that gave me no ill effects on the first try. Said medication didn't become ineffective while I was taking it. I had the support and energy to keep working and job hunt at the same time. Four and a half years of living in a house of cards where anything could have brought it all crashing down. And then where would I be? Maybe back on the dual carriageway, looking at the gap in the barrier. But I was lucky, and now I'm here.

I stopped taking the antidepressants six months into the new job. Aside from a little lightheadedness of withdrawal, nothing happened. No exhaustion. No sadness. No lack of appetite or inability to sleep. It was over. I don't like saying 'cured', and I can't say 'free', because in a sense I'll never be free. This happened to me. All of it. And I can't just forget it, pretend it didn't happen. For starters it's eleven years of my life, I can't sweep that under the rug. I guess what I can do is learn from it, and keep it as a warning. Know the red flags in case it happens again.

If you've read all of the above, thanks I guess. It's definitely the longest blog I've written to date, and will likely be the longest I ever write. It took several days to pull it all together. While the events are true to the best of my recollection, it is possible that I'm misremembering them, putting things in the wrong time or attributing to the wrong person. If you or someone you know is experiencing depression, and don't have a good societal infrastructure to go to for help, I recommend talking to friends, family or colleagues. There's the cliche of the person that attempts suicide and survives, then the self harm being labelled 'a cry for help'. Don't let it get that far. Be open with your feelings, and encourage others to do likewise. In the end, it's okay to admit that you're not okay.

#mental health #working life #bad job

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minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong · 5 years

Text

Sweet Dreams Chapter Two

Lucid dreaming: The process of being aware that one is dreaming. Some researchers believe that in lucid dreaming, the individual may be able to change the outcome of the dream or control their degree of participation in the imaginary (dream) environment.

Description: Lee Eunbyul has been plagued with hellish nightmares since she was a child. Not the sort of nightmares you may be familiar with. There are no monsters to evade, no serial killers to outrun, no auditoriums of classmates in front of whom to stand naked. Instead there is just…darkness. Endless darkness. With professional help, the dreams come less frequently. But after moving away from home to live with her sister, Eunbyul’s nightmare returns, only this time it’s different. This time…she’s not alone.

What would you do if you had the chance to change the outcome of not only your dreams, but your life?

Genre: Romance, Drama, Fluff, Angst, Slow Burn

Pairing: Namjoon x (f) OC

Word Count: 7.3k

Tags: Non-Idol!Au, Producer!Namjoon, Bookstore Clerk!Seokjin, Potter!Jimin, Producer!Yoongi, Dancer!Hoseok

Warnings: Frequent mentions of mental illness, infrequent swearing and mentions of alcohol

A/N: Hello! I’m trying out links for this chapter to see if Tumblr eats it, since I don’t know if links are working now. But anyway, here’s chapter two! Thank you guys for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter! Please don’t be shy and send feedback, critique, questions, theories, and comments my way. I’ll be sure to respond to all asks I receive within a day of receiving them!

And again, if you want to follow my Twitter, my username is @/plzpunchmebts. I’m super active over there and hopefully in the future I’ll do some livestreams/chats with you all!

- Mercury

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Masterlist

Weekly updates: Sunday, 1PM (PST)

Namjoon

I rubbed my eyes as the breaking morning light filtered in through the swaying curtains beside my bed. Sighing, I pushed myself up onto my forearms, then onto my legs, then onto my feet. I padded over to the window, stifling a yawn, and grabbed the frame. I’d left the thing open all night, having fallen asleep too suddenly to remember to close it properly, and now mosquitos flew in lopsided circles around my lamp. Also left on overnight. I groaned and pulled the window shut, shooing the mosquitos with squinted eyes. I checked the clock on my black wall. 4:03 AM.

Quietly, I followed the scent of coffee and sauntered out into the living room where Yoongi sat, legs crossed on the couch, flipping through a book on Greek mythology with one hand and holding a mug in the other.

“Morning,” I said, like every morning.

“Mm,” he replied, like every morning.

I suspected Yoongi hadn’t even bothered to go to sleep, and the purplish bags beneath his eyes didn’t help. The apartment was spotless as usual. Yoongi wasn’t one to let mess pile up, and I was grateful at least for that. What he lacked in socializing, he made up for in peace and cleanliness. I slipped along the cool wood floor and wandered into the kitchen, pouring myself a generous cup of coffee from the pot Yoongi had left on.

“Crazy dream?” asked Yoongi. I found the heart of his question in the words he didn’t say. You never wake up before noon. You okay?

I hummed and settled down at the table, running my finger along the polished trim. Everything in this apartment was pristine, lined with precision and placed with care. That’s how Yoongi was. Even before we met at his studio, he struck me as the diligent type.

I guess I felt like I could learn something from someone like him.

With a sigh I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t remember.”

“Hm,” said Yoongi with a gruff cough, pausing to flip the page in his book.

And that was that. With a few words exchanged between us, I was left to watch the morning sun arc across the blemishes sky outside the wall of windows facing the ocean. I was left to think.

Sometimes I wished he was more talkative…

The bus rattled down the sun-drenched street and I watched buildings pass by in silence. Normally, I’d have worn headphones but at Yoongi’s request, I’d left them behind so he could work on a beat at home. I rested my head against the window and shut my eyes with a heavy sigh. Why don’t you just talk to him? Those were the words replaying in my mind. Hoseok always was startlingly astute, in an oblivious sort of way. Of course, my friend of twenty years could say something so blasé like that without knowing what it meant for me. Tell him you wanna write music.

Just tell him.

A pang rang through the bus, signaling the approach of my stop, and I gathered my backpack and cell phone, standing with my hand on the rail overhead. “Ah, sorry,” I mumbled as an older woman stood beside me, stumbling with the unsteady stall of the bus.

She turned to me with a weathered smile and patted my arm. “Thank you,” she said, gently sliding down the aisle with both arms swung out as if she could fall over at any moment.

I watched her, uneasy, as she made her way to the exit. But as she exited, someone else entered and in their haste, they brushed a shoulder against the old woman’s chest, knocking her back slightly. I jumped, rushing to catch up to her, as she grabbed hold of the rail beside the exit. I placed a hand on her forearm to steady her, and again she offered a smile.

“Hey,” I shouted, turning to see the perpetrator was staring at the scene, eyes covered with a ball cap, short, curling black hair sprouting from underneath.

Upon closer inspection, the hapless bus-rider was a young girl, although with her face downturned it was hard to tell much about her beside her unimposing height. I scanned her from head to toe. Narrow shoulders, drowning in a shirt three sizes too big, shorts just barely visible underneath the hem, tanned legs and dirty tennis shoes. But my eyes lingered on her hands. Small, balled into fists, her index fingers were digging into the skin of her thumbs, picking as she stared at the old woman in the exit.

“I-,” she began, and her voice was almost too soft to hear over the engine.

“You gonna pay?” asked the bus driver, eyeing her impatiently.

The girl jumped and turned to him, swiping her pass and shuffling with her shoulders pinched and her head down until she found an empty spot. The spot I’d taken before. I sighed and stepped down toward the woman, offering my arm to help her out onto the street.

“Oh thank you, son,” she said once the both of us were safely on the sidewalk.

Sparing no time, the bus sped off down the road. I watched it for half a second before returning my attention to the woman with a smile. “Don’t worry about it,” I said, bowing. “Sorry about that,” I added, and I wasn’t sure why I apologized for that stranger. It wasn’t my apology to make, anyway.

She shook her head. “No, that’s alright,” she said with a simple smile before turning on her heel and waving goodbye. “Take care, sweetheart!”

I returned the smile along with the wave, but something wasn’t sitting quite right with me. As I turned on my heel towards the studio a block down, it hit me.

That girl on the bus was oddly familiar.

“How’s the project coming along?” asked Jisoo as he stood over my shoulder, gazing at the monitor with his specs sliding down the bridge of his nose.

I cleared my throat and nodded. “It’s good. The music will be automatically triggered when the player walks past this line, so I made sure to line it up properly,” I said, pointing with an index finger at the screen.

Sound design in video games was laborious work, and even more so when the sound is music. Footsteps, fighting noises, slashing sounds: those could be left to the programmers without a second thought. But music? That was the sort of thing that had to be implemented by somebody who understood dramatic tension, timing, placement. Of course, should the programmers decide they don’t need the help of an indie commercial freelance company for their music design, they could probably do a great job. But contracting us was a convenient way to take nonessential work and pass it to someone qualified to handle it.

In my case, overqualified.

“Good,” said Jisoo, but it was clear he was only half-listening as he stirred his coffee with a grimace. “That scene gonna be ready by tomorrow?”

“I mean…,” I began. It was the first I’d heard of such a short deadline. Quietly, I settled my nerves and met Jisoo’s eyes through the glare of his glasses. “Sure,” I said, reluctant.

His face split in a smile, wrinkles around his lips deepening as he ran a hand through his salt-and-pepper hair. “Great,” he said, patting my shoulder once. “We’re counting on you, Joon.”

Joon.

I swallowed hard and cleared my throat, turning back to my computer with a tense smile. “I’ll get to it then,” I said as he gave me a thumbs up and meandered down the hallway, out of my tiny, shared office.

I sighed, resting my cheek in my hand, and stared at the screen. Tiny characters idled in a wide, green field, awaiting my command to test if I’d placed the song correctly. I already knew I had. Of course, I should have been grateful to have a job in the first place. Albeit unfulfilling, the work gave me a steady income and despite the well of disappointment in my chest whenever Yoongi left to work in his own studio with real musical artists, I shouldn’t have been sighing all the time.

“Yikes,” said Jungkook from beside me, a young programmer who’d snagged the job at our company straight out of college.

He eyed me from his desk, only feet away from mine, and pushed his headphones back to rest against his collarbone. He was still a kid, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to work on games for the rest of his life. Really, working with a producing company was probably the best option for him. And every day you could see it in the way he moved that he was passionate. His round, inquisitive eyes were always landing on something new on his monitor, nimble fingers always typing away.

I doubted the kid had ever been apathetic about anything in his life.

“Yeah,” I breathed, glancing out the window to my right. Fresh sunlight poured in from outside. A fine day…

“You really gonna get it done in time?” he asked, refocusing on his screen as he popped a convenience store sausage in his mouth. He chewed on it, never looking away from the monitor, eyes alight.

I shrugged and leaned back in my chair. “Guess I gotta,” I said, still watching the day. In the distance, just below the horizon, I watched the train tracks as the afternoon train chugged by, windows glinting in the light. “It’s a crime to be inside on a day like this, though,” I remarked with a sigh.

Jungkook chuckled. “That’s what old people say,” he said, still munching.

I rolled my eyes and propped my headphones back up against my ears. “Everyone seems old to you,” I said. “Because you’re still a baby.”

Jungkook furrowed his brow and shot me a petulant look. “I’m a grown man.”

I chuckled and nodded, waving my hand to dismiss him. “Sure thing, big guy,” I said, continuing to set the music trigger just so.

The evening sun had long descended by the time my feet hit the pavement outside, and my hands and mind were exhausted. I wrung my wrists a little as I sighed into the nighttime air. The city was quiet, quieter than Seoul at any rate, and as I meandered toward the bus stop the simple sound of my cell phone ringing had me jumping. I fumbled with the phone for a moment as I fished it from my back pocket and slowly peered down at it.

Hani, displayed the screen and I raised my brows.

“Hello?” I asked as a white hatchback sped past, kicking up dirt on the street.

“Joonie,” she whined, and I could tell she was drunk. “I miss you.”

I gripped the bridge of my nose and nodded once, shutting my eyes against the yellow glow of the streetlamp overhead. “Uh-huh…”

“Come get me?”

I felt my chest constrict just a little. My mistake for answering in the first place. My mistake like always. “Where are you?” I asked carefully.

She mumbled something, words slurring together, before returning her attention to our phone call. “I’m at that bar by the beach. The pretty one.”

I knew the one. Sighing, I nodded. “Be there in ten,” I said, not awaiting a response as I pocketed the phone and began jogging down an alleyway, following a straight path to the shoreline.

Hani was right about one thing, anyway. The bar was pretty. In the summertime, when the air is fine and the clouds don’t linger too long, the beachside bar opens its windowed doors and extends its seating to the patio, right along the sand. The entrance was nestled deep beneath a canopy of light, sun-bleached wood beams and curling greenery, twinkling lights glowing on strings that wrapped around the entire patio.

Didn’t need to be a genius to know where she was. Quietly, I maneuvered around dancing bar patrons milling about in the gaps between tables and lounge chairs and made my way inside. The interior was dark. Not my style, really. But Hani always liked it here, which meant I spent plenty of drunk nights here. I approached the bar on the far wall and that was when I saw her.

Back on display from the low cut of her black dress, her brown hair waved over one slender shoulder and I saw her smile in profile. Perfect teeth, full cheeks rosy with alcohol and youth, eyes half-shut as she slapped a man’s arm. Gently, I approached her from behind and placed a hand on the small of her back, creating a wall between her and the man beside her. Her bright eyes landed on me and her smile went wider. She laughed, a loud, reverberating sound that pierced my ears even over the bumping music. Without a word, she wrapped her arms around my shoulders and held tight, standing to her feet.

“You’re smashed,” I remarked as I smelled the alcohol on her breath.

She giggled, running her fingers along the skin of my neck. “Hm…,” she mumbled, eyes shut as she swayed in front of me. “Let’s go walk on the beach.”

I placed my hands on her upper arms and guided her hands back to her sides, fixing her with a pointed look. “No, Hani we’ve gotta get you home-,”

“I wanna walk!” she shouted, the famous Hani pout on her ruby lips.

I swallowed hard. “No-,”

“I’m walking with or without you.”

And with that, she swung around in a grand circle and, with crossed arms, stomped across the bar and onto the patio where she paused, back still turned, and waited for me. Of course, she didn’t mean it. She just wanted me to go with her. And she knew how to bend me to her will. She always did.

I sighed, pressing my index fingers firmly against my temples. I didn’t need this today. Or any day, really. But as I opened my eyes I saw her peering at me over the slope of her shoulder and was powerless once again. Wordlessly, I rolled my eyes and followed behind her as she giggled and led the way out onto the sand.

It only took her a few steps to remove her strappy heels and fan her long hair out behind her with a huff. “Too hot,” she mumbled, adjusting the strap of her silk dress. “I’d go naked if I thought you wouldn’t hate me for it,” she teased with a glance my way and a cheeky grin.

“I wouldn’t hate you for something you did while you were drunk,” I said, crossing my arms as I matched her slow, stumbling pace.

The beach was serene, only a few people wandering through the sand. We walked parallel to the crashing, navy blue waves and each step took us further and further from the businesses lining the north side of the beach. We were getting close. Just around that cliffside, if we clung to the rocks, we’d emerge on the other side. All alone there.

“Joon?” she asked, staring up at me with round eyes.

“Hm?”

“Did you hear anything I said?” she asked, furrowing her dark brow.

I clamped my mouth shut and let my eyes fall to my feet on the sand. “I…sorry,” I said with a sigh.

“We’re almost there, aren’t we?” she asked with a nod. “I’ll forgive you this time because we’re almost there.”

I inhaled sharply through my nose and turned my eyes toward her. She was bathed in silver moonlight, fair skin glowing. Beautiful. “Why were you out drinking?”

“Am I not allowed?” she asked with a smirk.

I sighed. “It’s a weekday, Hani.”

“And I don’t have work tomorrow so what’s the harm?” She groaned and shook out her hands with a disgruntled huff. “You’re so stiff. This is why I broke up with you.”

There it was. “Hani, you need to go home.”

“And you never fight back,” she mumbled. “Making me the bad guy for saying anything in the first place.” She examined her hand for a moment, pouting.

“I don’t think it’s good for us to keep seeing each other,” I said carefully, choosing my words with care. I watched her expression go from sulky to petulant in a blink. She turned to me, eyes sharp. “It’s not healthy.”

She scoffed. “Why not?” she asked. “We were friends before we started dating, weren’t we? Why can’t we be friends now?”

“Because I don’t see you as just a friend and I think you know that,” I said, scanning her.

She opened and closed her mouth like a hinge before settling on closed and turning her head toward the shoreline. She stopped walking, crossed her arms, and watched the water for a long, silent moment.

“They’re finalizing it,” she said quietly as her eyes went distant. “My parents.”

I blinked at her. “They’re…really?”

She nodded. “That’s why I’m out tonight,” she said, voice soft against the water. “Mom called this morning and told me. Like it was nothing for her.”

“Hani…”

“Like it’s easy,” she said, wiping beneath her eyes with her free hand. “I texted Sooyoung but she didn’t reply. She saw it though. Just…didn’t reply.”

Gently, I came to rest beside her. I thought about wrapping an arm around her small, trembling shoulders and holding her close. But the intoxicating scent of her rosy perfume even from this distance was enough to keep that idea at bay. Instead, I simply rested my palm against her back and gave her a pat.

“I’m worried Sooyoung is gonna start up again,” she said with a sigh as she scratched her nose. “Like she did last year. I dunno…a divorce is a big deal for someone her age. She’s sixteen now, you know? Did I tell you that?” she asked, peeking up at me with glassy eyes.

“I know, Hani,” I said, smoothing my palm against her back.

She sniffled and nodded. “Yeah.” She sighed. “I don’t want her to be stupid like me.”

“You’re not stupid,” I said softly, shaking my head.

She smiled, but it wasn’t all there. “You don’t have to lie. I make stupid choices. Like tonight. Calling you. I just…I want her to grow up without making the mistakes I made, you know? I don’t want her to be twenty-four, drunk, crying on the beach with her ex-boyfriend.” She shook her head. “Or worse.”

“Stop thinking about all that, okay?” I said, patting her back once more before dropping my hand. “You need to get home.”

She eyed me sidelong, long eyelashes stained white against the moonlight. She was calmer now, more reasonable. Softly, she sighed and nodded her head. “Okay,” she said.

I nodded and turned back toward the bar, but I’d only taken one step when I felt her small hands wrap around my sides, clasping at my stomach. She rested her cheek against my back and my whole body went stiff. I felt her chest against me, her arms firm around my torso. And just like that, she held onto me. Like a life preserver, keeping her afloat. And it might have felt nice if it wasn’t so cruel.

“Thank you, Joonie,” she said softly against my back.

I cleared my throat and patted the top of her hand. “Let’s…let’s get you home.”

Hani: Thanks for everything tonight, Joonie.

I stared at my phone screen, holding it right above my face as I lie on my back in bed. I sighed and let my felt hand fall against the comforter, squinting at the phone. The message sat like an omen before me, like the promise of something I didn’t dare to hope for. I knew better than to respond. I knew better than to answer her call in the first place. I knew better than to meet her for coffee or dinner or movies after we ended. I knew better than to respond.

Namjoon: Of course. You know I still care about you.

Hani: I know. I care about you too :-)

I felt my chest constrict. How stupid. I slid my phone to rest on my nightstand and caught the time out the corner of my eye. 11:15. I had to be up early tomorrow to work on the game. Really, I should have been asleep an hour ago.

And here I was. Still stuck where I’ve always been.

I shook my head, giving my chest a few hard pats. If I thought about it too long, I’d end up moping. Instead, I simply stayed there, resting against the plush of my pillow, staring up at the ceiling until my heavy eyelids drifted shut and my breaths came more slowly.

Huh. I glanced around the depthless blackness and blinked a few times. Lucid dreaming again? I furrowed my brow and gave my jaw a scratch. Well, Hani hugging me probably did something weird to my brain. I stretched my torso this way and that, cracked my knuckles.

“Good timing,” I said to myself as I took a sweeping look around. “What’ll it be tonight?” A smile crept across my lips as I rubbed my palms together.

“Namjoon?”

I jumped, a scream escaping me from someplace deep in my chest, and whipped around in a half-circle towards the source of the voice. And that’s when I saw her. My eyes went wide, gaping, as the memories came flooding back in a wave that nearly bowled me over.

Standing in a baggy sleep shirt and too-big patterned pajama pants was the girl from the night before. Eunbyul. Her hair was a mess of black curls waving around her chin, furrowing her strong brow at me. Like the night before, she possessed a sad, quiet kind of charm. With slightly downturned eyes and clothes that looked like they might swallow her whole, she was the sort of person you wanted to take care of. The kind of person you worried didn't take care of themselves.

She pushed round-rimmed glasses up the bridge of her nose with a sniff and gave me a squint, face flushed. Had she been crying again? Was she scared again? She remembered my name, but did she remember everything else?

Suddenly, my heart was racing and so was my head and anxious questions began swirling around my mind, impossible to ignore. But when I spoke, none of them came out. Instead-

“You’re here again,” I said, unable to stop myself.

She blinked at me and for a long moment, we simply locked eyes. Neither said anything, perhaps both of us being too wary of the other to speak. But after an endless silence, she cracked a crooked smile, revealing bright teeth and a pleasant pinch in the apples of her cheeks.

She chuckled, rubbing the bare back of her neck. “Ah, uh…yeah. I guess,” she said, voice soft. She had a peculiar sort of voice, breathy, almost uncertain. I was certain I’d recognize it anywhere.

I opened and closed my jaw a few times, struggling for words, before simply settling for a laugh. “Well, uh…hi,” I said with a smile.

She returned it, albeit hesitantly. She crossed her arms over her torso and her eye went hazy with thought. “Say, did you remember the dream from last night?” she asked, brows knit as she met my eyes once more.

I shook my head. “Not until I saw you.”

She set her lips thin and fixed me with a serious upward glance. “Same here.”

“Huh…”

She paced around in the dark for a moment, mouth pursed in thought, pausing every few paces to adjust her glasses. “I wonder why…”

I chuckled. “Well,” I began, taking up the space beside her and matching her pace, stride for stride, “the memory is unreliable. Some people can’t remember their dreams at all unless they write them down right away.”

She halted her pacing and crossed her arms, looking up at me. “This feels different though, doesn’t it? Like…I don’t know, like the memory of the dream just got wiped completely.”

“If you’re gonna keep getting hung up on all the details that don’t make sense, you’re gonna be here all night,” I said, then laughed. “No pun intended.”

She scoffed. “How can you be so blasé about all this? Aren’t you…freaked out?” she asked, voice getting quieter as she lost her steam.

I shrugged. “None of this adds up anyway. So why not just enjoy it?” I asked, cocking a brow with a smile.

“It’s…it’s not that easy, you know,” she said, then sighed. “You’re…I guess you’re more adaptable than me.”

I paused a moment, scanning her. Her somber eyes were set on the nothing beneath her bare feet, arms wrapped around her torso like she was holding herself together at the seams. I swallowed hard and thought for a moment, focusing hard on a memory.

When I opened my eyes we were standing in the middle of an empty footpath, blooming trees and bushes creating a blanket that stretched on before us. Vibrant pinks, oranges, and yellows dotted the foliage that sloped downhill before us, like a mural. Down the path, a pond and a few traditional buildings. The sun was tempered by gently rolling clouds, and the sky felt limitless overhead.

And there were no people besides us.

After all, my brain couldn’t conjure all the faces I saw that day.

She blinked at the scenery around her, wind rustling through the trees, caressing the baby hairs along her temples. Her eyes went wide, lips forming an O, and her hands fell to her sides as she whirled around a few times, looking at the view from all angles.

“What-,” she began, then looked back at me, wild. “Namjoon, what’s all this?”

I smiled and stretched my arms out wide, embracing the abundance around me. “The Garden of Morning Calm,” I said. “I came here when I was a kid. Back when I lived in Sangdo-dong.”

“You lived there too?” she asked, brows high.

I nodded, taking a few easy steps down the path. She jogged to reach me, still staring up at me, imploring. “Yeah, when I was young. Anyway…I just…,” I began, feeling sheepish under her disarming gaze. I glanced away, toward the horizon line, and cleared my throat. “This place makes me feel calm, so I figured maybe it would do the same for you.”

She slowed down a little, watching me from behind for a moment before catching up once again. She stumbled a little over her pajama bottoms. “I-it does,” she said, catching herself before she tripped. She kept her eyes down, watching her feet carefully, as she found her pace beside me. “Thanks.”

“Yeah,” I said with a sigh. “I know I must seem…kinda nonchalant about all this but….” I shrugged and took a deep breath of the fresh, autumn air. “I dunno. This place…it’s pretty incredible.”

“Funny,” she said with a soft chuckle. “For as long as I can remember, I’ve been terrified of this dream but…you’ve been enjoying it, huh?”

I smiled. “It’s like a little vacation from life, I guess,” I said, and I almost regretted it. Way to go, I thought with a cringe, saying something sad like that to a stranger…

But to my relief, she simply offered a pensive hum and a nod. “I never thought of it that way.”

I blinked at her, silhouetted against the fall foliage and vibrant sun, and saw in her expression nothing but a pensive quietude. Like I could have said anything she she wouldn’t have thought I was strange. I felt my cheeks warm a little, and cleared my throat.

“Up here is a gazebo,” I said, pointing up ahead.

She squinted down the path and smiled softly. “Nice,” she said.

I chuckled. “Those glasses…you weren’t wearing them last night,” I said, reaching out to guide them up her nose again. “The nose pads are too far apart.”

She jumped a little at my touch before settling and squaring a look at me. “Well, they’re old,” she said with a little purse of her lips, crossing her arms as we neared the gazebo. “I didn’t want to be a bother when I got them fitted, so I just said they were fine.”

She led the way inside, ducking her head just a little as she crossed the three-stepped threshold into the structure. Crawling greenery stretched out across the exterior, and some of the vines reached through the cracks in the ceiling, but it felt nice in the shade. Gently, she took a seat and exhaled, patting the tops of her pajamaed thighs. She glanced up at me as I stood in the center of the rounded room and raised her brows.

“You gonna sit?” she asked, taking a peek at the space beside her on the dark wood bench.

“Ah…sure.” I quickly joined her, aware of the slightly awkward space between us. Despite being in this dream together, we were strangers after all. What could we really talk about?

“I had an appointment today in Sangdo-dong,” she began, watching her bare toes. “With my therapist.”

“Therapist?” I asked, then shook my head. “Sorry, didn’t mean to pry.”

She chuckled. “Not like either of us will remember this in the morning anyway,” she said with a shrug. “But…yeah, a therapist.”

I inhaled fresh air and sighed slowly. I knew I shouldn’t ask, shouldn’t pry, but she was right anyway. What’s the use in holding back in a situation like this? “What for?”

“Anxiety,” she said with a sigh. “Since I was young. Before the dreams even.”

“Ah,” I said, nodding. I eyed her, careful not to say something insensitive, and saw again that thoughtful, distant look. “How did it go?”

“Not well.”

“Oh…”

“I told him I’ve been struggling trying to figure things out, and he told me I needed to spend more time thinking on it,” she said with a scoff. “Imagine that. Thinking more about something I think about all day.”

“What’re you struggling with?” I asked, and regretted it right after. Too far, definitely. She’d fix me with a glare and we wouldn’t speak anymore. She’d be rightfully put off.

“Trying to find something that makes me feel like a person,” she said with a single nod.

And with that, my heart rate slowed. Such a simple sentence, but it packed a punch. “I understand that,” I said.

She glanced at me. “How?”

“Well…sometimes it’s easy to get swept up in the swing of surviving and forget what it is that makes you feel alive,” I said, and against my will my mind returned to the beach last night, staring at the slope of Hani’s shoulder, her eyes glittering. I cleared my throat and leaned back.

She smiled. “Seems like you need to talk more than I do,” she said, raising her brows.

I swallowed hard and focused on my clasped hands. “Just…someone from my past.”

“You don’t have to be vague with me,” she said with a laugh. “Like I said, I won’t remember anyway.” She seemed…lighter tonight than she had before. Almost like something bobbing in the water, coming up for air and staying there, suspended.

“My ex,” I said, sighing. “She’s…she’s difficult.”

Eunbyul raised her brows. “You fighting?”

I smiled. “No, no. Nothing like that, just…we can’t seem to get a clean break, you know? Like…we can’t move on from being around each other. Even though it’s unhealthy,” I said, then shook my head. “I’m sure you get it.”

“I don’t,” she said, stretching her torso this way and that before settling and meeting my eyes, innocent. I furrowed my brow, and she maintained her gaze. “I’ve never dated.”

“Huh?” I asked, surprised.

She laughed. “I don’t really know how to interact with people,” she said with a nod. “Or maybe…I can interact if there’s no pressure. Like right now. If I don’t feel like I’m in the way or being a burden.” She waved her hands. “Anyway, tell me more so I can understand.”

I blinked at her, at the round, flushed apples of her cheeks, the flashing whites of her eyes as she turned her head to look at the trees swaying before us. “Um…,” I began, thinking. “Well…we’ve been friends for a long time. So breaking up was tricky, you know? What was our relationship supposed to be from then on? Did we go back to friends? Did we cut ties? Did we slowly distance ourselves?”

“Ah,” she said, nodding. “I see.”

“I think…for me, the healthiest option is to completely remove her from my life, you know? It’s no good for me to keep spending time with her.” I wrung my hands a little and sighed. “I can’t figure out where the boundaries are anymore.”

“Have you talked to her about it?” asked Eunbyul, poking her big toe against the wood floorboard.

“I…kinda.”

“Kinda isn’t really good enough,” she said, still poking, eyes transfixed on her foot, hands gripping the bench seat. “In relationships, you have to be explicit to avoid misunderstandings. Communication is the most important thing,” she said, then chuckled. “Although I’m not the authority on all that.” She paused her poking and met my eyes with a gentle, knowing smile. “If you don’t know where the boundaries are, you gotta place them yourself.”

I opened my mouth to respond, but my thoughts evaded me the longer she looked up at me, strands of waving hair falling behind her glasses, touching the tops of her eyes. It looked like she expected something from me. Not a response or a reaction, not really anything like that.

It seemed like all she expected was for me to understand her.

I nodded. “That’s…shockingly astute,” I said with a laugh, rubbing my jaw as I finally broke the tense eye contact.

She smiled and leaned back against the bench. “I wanna try showing you something,” she said, standing to her feet and padding gently toward the center of the gazebo. She turned to me. “Just…try to see it in my head?”

“See it, feel it, hear it, smell it,” I said, then smirked. “Taste it, if you can.”

She laughed and nodded. “I’ll…I’ll try tasting it then,” she said as she shut her eyes tight.

For a moment, nothing changed. Just the same gazebo, the same scent of damp wood and crisp air, the same sunlight stretching in shafts between branches. But after a few moments, I saw something on the horizon. The sky was bleeding from cerulean to navy blue, stretching slowly overhead. The scenery went fuzzy before disappearing entirely and emerging again, morphed. The geological features began to sharpen as Eunbyul simply stood there, eyes shut, a charming wrinkle between her brows as she concentrated. And, before I knew it, I was standing in the middle of a desert I didn’t recognize, midnight sky above and orange sand underfoot. I scanned the area and saw open space in every direction, rock stacks eroded over time standing erect around the horizon. In the sky was a portrait of stars, so many I couldn’t possibly count them, and small shrubby bushes punctured the iron-red ground as it extended endlessly.

Eunbyul opened her eyes and, without sparing a single moment, broke into an infectious grin that pulled her eyes nearly shut and exposed her canines. She turned around a few times before laughing and clapping her hands. “No way!” she exclaimed, and her voice echoed through the canyon.

I smiled. “What’s this place?” I asked.

She turned to me with a wild, breathless smile and I felt my heart kick up. Just a little. A warm desert wind swept through the valley and kicked up dust, playing with the ends of her dark hair. “I went camping once on a vacation to the US. With my family. This was my favorite night. Nobody around, just us,” she said with a nod, bending her neck so she could stare right at the sky. She pointed. “See all the constellations?”

I raised my brows and glanced up with her. Indeed, it seemed the stars, although innumerable, were positioned perfectly. I recognized the Big Dipper, dangling in the sky like it was pouring stars onto black and blue canvas of sky.

“Do you know a lot about constellations?” I asked.

“Gaeul taught me on this trip,” she said, grinning, then snapped her fingers and pointed at me. “Sorry, Gaeul is my sister.” She was still smiling like mad, and her eyes were alight for the first time since we met.

I nodded. “Tell me something about them,” I said, smiling gently as I sat down on the dusty earth.

She joined me, holding her knees close to her chest, and pointed at the sky. “That’s Ursa Major,” she said, and I followed her eyes to the big dipper. “The ladle is just part of the bigger constellation, you know? It’s supposed to look like a bear.” She laughed, and the sound was soft, almost like an exhale. “In Roman myths, it’s all about Jupiter and Callisto and jealousy and turning into bears, but I like the Korean myth better.”

“What’s that?” I asked, dropping my eyes from the sky to her.

“There was a widow who had seven sons, and became fond of a widower across the river. Her sons wanted to help her cross the water, so they each put down a stone for her to walk across. The mother didn’t know her sons put the rocks in the water. But she was grateful so she blessed the stones and when her sons died, they became stars,” she said, smiling so softly it was barely there. Just a tilt of her lips.

I watched her as she spoke, barely lit by the moon and the stars, eyes aglow. It was familiar, like before with Hani. But this felt decidedly different. Everything was different.

If only I could remember it in the morning…

“That’s a beautiful story,” I said with a smile.

She turned to me and nodded. “I think so too,” she said, then sighed and gave my shoulder a pat. “You’re a good person, Namjoon. I can tell.”

I chuckled. “And you’re not as bad at socializing as you think you are.”

She smirked. “I told you,” she began, leaning back on her palms with a sigh. “Low stakes make it easy to say what you want without being scared.”

“I wonder why we keep ending up here together,” I pondered idly.

She smiled. “You’re the one who said not to get hung up on the details that don’t make sense,” she said, then turned her head to look at the stars again.

“You seem awfully easygoing,” I remarked with a laugh.

She grinned and her eyes went small again. “I see what you mean now,” she said, sighing. “About this being like a vacation from life.”

I watched her for a moment before I felt something tugging. Just like before. And, from the way her eyes got round and her shoulders pinched, I was pretty sure Eunbyul felt it too. We locked gazes, neither one saying anything, and struggling against the pull in my chest, I reached out my hand, extending it toward her.

She blinked at it before, wordlessly, she took it in both of hers and shook it up and down. “Until next time,” she said with a serious look my way.

I nodded, letting my hand fall against the dirt. “Until next time.”

I awoke with heart palpitations. Blinking rapidly, I rubbed my face and patted down the sweat that had begun to dot my forehead. I glanced toward the clock on the wall. 4:03 again. Grumbling, I turned over onto my stomach and smashed my face against the pillows, yanking my blankets over my head.

“Stupid brain,” I mumbled into the sheets, exhaling long and slow.

I tried to force myself back to sleep, tried to will my brain to power down like an old desktop computer. I rolled onto my side, curling my legs up toward my chest. When that didn’t work, I thumped over onto my back once more and spread my arms wide, like I was physically begging for the embrace of unconsciousness. Long seconds ticked by, marked with the sound of my clock, always ticking like a metronome.

“Ugh,” I groaned, sitting upright with a frown. I glanced around the room and saw my phone still sitting on the charger. If I wasn’t getting back to sleep, the least I could do to sate my hyperactive brain was scroll mindlessly through Twitter.

I grabbed for the phone and unlocked it, but before I could tap the little blue app icon, I noticed a new text message in the bottom corner of the screen. I raised my brows and opened it. Sent at 2:39 AM.

Hani: Call me please.

Panic.

I jumped up and sat on my knees, typing her number in by heart. I pressed the phone to my ear and listened with bated breath to the dial tone. It was taunting me, every painfully slow drone and the endless pauses between. I counted five rings before they stopped altogether and I was met with nothing but radio silence.

“Hani?” I asked, frantic, breathless.

She sniffled on the other end and I collapsed against my bed with relief. “Hey.”

“Jesus, what’s wrong?” I asked, words stumbling into one another like a clumsy line.

“Sorry, it’s just…,” she began, then sniffled again. “It’s Sooyoung.”

“Fuck, Hani, is she alright? Is she safe?” I asked, heart hammering.

“Yeah, yeah she’s fine,” she said. “God, I’m so sorry. I keep doing this.”

“Hani what happened?”

She paused a moment before taking a shaky breath in. “She called me drunk.”

I was silent, just listening to the arrhythmic pattern of her breath. “Hani…”

“It’s fine, I called my folks and they found her in the basement. But…fuck, I dunno I got, like, a glimpse into her future,” she said, then paused. “And it looks a lot like mine.”

“Hani, are you alright?” I asked carefully, resting against the pillows with furrowed brows. “Have you slept?”

“Can’t.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, Joonie,” she said with a sigh. “I just…Joon, could I…could I maybe come over? Watch a movie or something?”

I stiffened. Bad idea. Horrible, terrible, really bad idea. Blurring more lines, crossing more barriers…at this rate, I’d be heartbroken until the day I died. It wasn’t like I was her only friend. She’d always been popular, and even when we were dating she’d go to Joohee before she’d ever go to me with a problem. Why now did it seem like she needed me so profoundly?

If you don’t know where the boundaries are, you gotta place them yourself.

I felt my stomach pang a little. Where had I heard that? Gently, I patted my chest in the hopes of settling my heart down. I knew what the right decision was. It was painfully obvious to anyone that I couldn’t let her come over, let her cross the threshold and reenter my intimate space. I knew the implications.

I sighed and braced myself, holding the phone close against my hot cheek. I shut my eyes, ran a hand through my unruly hair, and nodded my head. “Um…,” I began, opening my eyes only halfway to stare with disappointment at the clock across from my bed. “Yeah, Hani. Of course.”

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snarky-badger · 6 years

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Oooooo—an Ultron idea for you!! Reader works at a computer store, and recently stuff has been going missing. But there's never any alarms, and the cameras just keep malfunctioning for no reason. It's just a mystery, until one night she's closing and forgets something inside after locking up. Instead of having to turn everything on and back off again, she just uses her phone light except now it seems like a horror game, and suddenly she gets the feeling that she's not alone anymore.

I had fun with this one. Again, its open ended in case someone wants more.

Sorry for the day and a half of quiet from me. Been distracted.

There was nothing you hated more than getting blamed for something that wasn’t your fault.

For three weeks, after you closed up the Best Buy you worked at, things - laptops, processors, motherboards, various circuitry and parts - had gone missing. Of course, your boss blamed you, as you were the last one in the store. But there were cameras everywhere, and you’d been filmed multiple times, closing up shop and leaving without the stolen merchandise, so there was nothing he could do.

Still, it irritated you.

It wouldn’t happen at the same time, either. There was no pattern, no reason. There weren’t any parts showing up on eBay, or in pawn shops. And every time, the cameras showed nothing. Naturally, you’d thought that someone had merely looped the footage, but your boss, the supposed Mr. Know-It-All, had waved your idea aside.

You’d been tasked with putting extra security tags and stickers on every box, every computer, sometimes doubling up the tags - it was an insult, you usually worked at the Geek Squad desk - but you weren’t in a position to argue, so you did it. Honestly, you were doubtful that it was a walkout thief, the cameras and security scanners at the doors would have caught them.

You boss had even put chains on the loading dock doors and back doors every night, and it had been interesting to watch him fume in the morning when the chains were found neatly coiled up on the floor, the padlocks locks sitting atop them.

Honestly, everyone was baffled. You were mainly pissed, but what could you do? Nothing. That was what. Someone was getting in, and there seemed to be no way to stop them short of hiring a twenty-four-hour guard - but corporate wouldn’t spring for the extra money.

So things continued on like that for another two weeks, your boss almost having an aneurysm every morning and the employees taking bets on who was responsible - there was a rather large pot going on. The top guess was a ghost, of all things. Your money was on some hacker desperate for parts.

But you kept your nose clean, and away from your boss. Closed up every night, waving at the cameras, and then heading to catch your bus.

Until one night, you forgot your MP3 player in the office.

You cursed, lowly, and headed back inside, not bothering with the overhead lights as you used your phone’s flashlight option to guide the way. Passing through the isles to the back offices was eerie, like something out of a Doom game. You half expected to have something jump out at you as you stepped into the pitch black office, but nothing came.

Shaking your head at your own stupidity, you grabbed your MP3 from it’s spot next to the computer you’d been debugging and deleting porn viruses off of, then headed back out, locking the back door behind you - you didn’t dare leave it open, the safe for all the cash was back there. You’d never hear the end of it if that was stolen.

You were heading back to the main doors, cutting through the gaming isle, when something rustled in the rear of the store. The light from your phone illuminated about five feet of space around you as you spun towards the sound, your heart in your throat.

Fuck, was the thief already in the store? You couldn’t be sure over the sound of your breathing and heartbeat, but you thought you’d heard movement, footsteps.

Shit, now what? Run, and get fired for not protecting the store? Call the cops?

But if you called the cops and it was nothing, you’d be a laughing stock.

Well, fuck. You’d have to check it out.

You weren’t being paid enough for this shit.

Hands shaking, making the light from your phone wobble dizzyingly, you headed towards where you thought you’d heard the noise, biting your lip to stay quiet. Wove through the isles, trying to keep your footsteps silent. Which, you realized, was useless, considering you were holding a bright shining beacon telling everyone where you were.

Giving up on stealth, you quickened your pace to the back of the store, hoping to either surprise the thief or at least just hurry up and figure out what was going on so you could leave, please and thank you.

You turned the corner, leaving the camera isle and heading into the isle with the external hard drives and walked right into a wall.

Cursing, you stumbled backwards, tripping over your own feet and landing on your butt on the floor. Your phone clattered to the tiles, spinning, the light dazzling you for a moment. When it stopped, you looked up and gaped.

There was a giant metal man staring down at you with glowing red eyes.

Naturally, you screamed.

Abandoning your phone, you scrambled to your feet and ran. Got, maybe five feet away before darkness enveloped you and you slammed face first into a massive display of radio controlled cars.

You hit the floor, a car bouncing off your head, as you sprawled across it’s numerous brethren, and out the door went your decorum. “Son of a bitch! Fuck!”

Heavy footsteps approached you. You were too addled to move, especially when you reached up to pull yourself to your feet only to have the rest of the display topple onto you.

“Are you alright?”

The slightly metallic, yet rich, voice that came from the metal man towering over you made you blink. He was carrying your phone, angling the light so it wouldn’t blind you. “You’re the thief.” Oh yes, brilliant deduction Sherlock. Fucksakes. “The fuck, man! I keep getting shit over the stuff you take!”

Crimson eyes blinked down at you before a laugh rumbled out of him. “Ah. You’re the one that closes up the store. Wasn’t expecting you to come back in. I thought you’d gone for the night.”

The calm, conversational, tone of his voice threw you off. “Forgot my MP3,” you grimaced, wincing as you shoved toy cars off of yourself. “I’d call the cops on you but no one would believe me.”

“I’d rather you didn’t. I…. Well, there’s a reason I’m ransacking a Best Buy instead of stealing top of the line parts. What’s the saying? I’m trying to keep things on the down-low?”

You squinted up at him, blinking when he crouched down. Close up, you could see that he had a sort of red cloak on him, a feeble attempt at hiding his metal form. Tiny metal pieces, like an intricate puzzle, made up his amazingly expressive face, crimson eyes like camera lenses focusing on you. "What, not a fan of eBay?“

"That would require an address. Besides, seeing your reaction, it isn’t as if I can stroll into a Post Office and rent a mailbox.”

“It’ dark and you scared the crap out of me,” you snapped in your defense. “I was expecting some moron in a ski mask not Megatron’s mini-me.”

Another chuckle left him. “Can’t say I’ve ever been compared to a Transformer before.” He tilted his head at you curiously. “Do you need help getting up?”

“What I need–” you paused to kick at one of the boxed up toy cars that were scattered around you. “Is a drink. I hope to hell you already looped the cameras, because I don’t want this clusterfuck plastered all over the lunchroom.”

Those crimson eyes of his widened a little. “Well, well. And here I took you for a run of the mill retail worker.”

“I am and overqualified run of the mill retail worker. I’m just not as stupid as my boss. Or my co-workers. There’s a betting pool going on over you. Half the staff thinks this place is haunted.”

He laughed again. “Well, I could try skulking around.” He grasped the edges of his ‘cloak’ and held a bit over his face. “Phantom of the Best Buy? Though I think I’d have trouble trying to get an organ into the basement.”

You snickered. “We don’t have a basement.”

“Hence the trouble,” he straightened, rising to his full height, towering over you again, then held a hand out to you. “Here, up you get.”

You hesitated a moment, then took his hand, gasping when he lifted you up onto your feet as if you weighed nothing. The fingers around yours were warm, not cold like you’d expected for a man made out of metal, and you felt him give you a gentle squeeze before letting go.

“There we go. Nothing broken?”

“Nothing but my pride.” You sent a look at the scattered remains of the display. “I’ll clean that up in the morning. Y'know, if you need stuff in bulk, we got a shipment of parts in today. It’s still in the back.”

One metal brow arched upwards. “Aiding and abetting a criminal now?”

You shrugged. “What the hell do I care? Boss’ll just blame me for it anyway and make my life hell whether you take it or not. Sides’ I figure that if someone as advanced as you obviously are is stealing from a Best Buy that you’re kinda desperate, so go for it.”

“Advanced?”

“I figured that calling you a robot might be rude. It’s the best I could come up with.”

“Ah. Well, thank for that then. Being called a 'robot’ is a rather touchy subject.”

“Hence the vagueness. You have a name or….?”

He shifted a little. “If you don’t know who I am, then it’s probably best that I don’t tell you.”

“You realize that I’ll just start googling 'giant technologically advanced metal man’ as soon as I get home, right?”

A very human sigh left him. “That’s not a good idea. Not unless you want SHEILD and the Avengers banging on your door.”

“Fucksakes. You’re big time, aren’t you? Fine, fine. I’ll drop it.” You ran a nervous hand through your hair, then blinked when something occurred to you. “Y'know, you’d be better off ransacking the warehouse the next town over. It’s one of the main shipping centers for all the stores in the region. Loads of merch there compared to the low stock here. Probably save you a few trips.”

He blinked. “That wasn’t listed on the directory I found on the servers.”

“Wouldn’t be. It’s just a warehouse, not a store.”

“Hm. And you’re alright with this? Most people wouldn’t be helping me.”

“I prefer to think of myself as different than 'most people’. Also, I get paid minimum wage, no benefits and my boss is an asshole. My loyalty to this place vanished about three months ago when they denied my sick leave because I wasn’t full-time.”

A disgusted noise left him. “It’s deplorable how this country treats it’s retail workers.”

“You have no idea. Speaking of, I’m going to be late to my other job. Gonna need my phone back.”

He eyed you a little warily. “No photos.”

“Pfft. As if I expect you to hold still long enough for a shot. Also, you could probably drop-kick me across the store, and I’m not a good flyer.” You made a little 'gimme’ gesture with your left hand, smiling a little when your phone was deposited into your palm. “Thanks.”

He watched you quietly as you checked it enough to insure that you hadn’t broken it when you’d dropped it earlier. “It still works, don’t worry.”

“It hit the floor. I worry.” Deeming it alive and well, you tilted it so the flashlight would still illuminate your odd companion without blinding either of you. “I need to go. Remember, all the good stock is in the back.”

“…Thank you.”

“Welcome.” You turned to leave, pausing when a large hand landed on your shoulder.

“Wait.” He sounded hesitant, and he was watching you again. “I have a crazy idea.”

“Does it involve me getting arrested for property theft?” you asked with a raised eyebrow. “Because I’m not really into vertical bars and I hate the colour orange.”

“Trust me, I can keep you safe. How would you like a job?”

“…a what?”

“You’re on the Geek Squad, right? I cross referenced your name with the employee roster. So you have at least a basic knowledge of computers and operating systems.”

You had no idea where he was heading. “Yeah?”

“I need another set of hands to help gather some supplies. Someone smart enough to be able to build a computer from scratch. And maybe a little help searching through that warehouse.”

That implications of that made you hesitate. You may have been lax about a giant metal man stealing from your workplace, but becoming a thief yourself… that was something completely different. “Why would you need me to help you build something? I mean, hell, look at you. You don’t need me to put a system together. If you can hack into the servers, you sure as hell are more than capable of dealing with some hardware.”

“True. But at the moment, I’m still just one person. I can only be in one place at a time. Which is… irking, trust me.”

“…can I give it some thought?”

He looked surprised that you were even going to consider it. “Of course. Here, pass me your phone for a moment.”

You did so, watching as he pulled a cord out from his left forearm, connecting it to your phone. The screen flickered a little, and you worried, before he hummed in satisfaction and disconnected from it again. “I upgraded your security and added a new app. You can contact me with it when you come to a decision.”

Blinking, you accepted your phone back again. “What kind of security?”

“Ah. The untraceable, unhackable kind. Don’t want just anyone contacting me, after all.”

A smirk tugged at your lips. “Telemarketers?”

“Telemarketers. Trying to convince me that my computer needs servicing.”

The dry, unimpressed, tone of his voice and the absurdity made you laugh. “Yeah, okay, you win the 'most annoying telemarketer’ award. Tell them you don’t have a computer, it makes them go nuts. Alternatively, tell them you’re from IT and you intercepted their call due to a problem, get them to confirm the type of phone they’re on , then google the reset setting and get them to follow the instructions. It’ll fuck up their phone for a week.”

That pulled an actual belly laugh from your odd companion, and you grinned when he mimed wiping a tear from his eyes. “Oh, that’s cruel. I love it. I’ll try that next time.”

“It’s highly entertaining on a petty level,” you grinned, waving a little as you turned to leave. “I’ll call you in a couple of days. I just need a bit of time to wrap my brain the insanity of this situation.”

He chuckled again. “Take your time.”

“See you around, Mr. Thief.” You left him behind as you headed for the front of the store, going through your interrupted custom of locking up the store. It was only when you were waiting at the bus stop for your ride to your next job that you took a good look at your phone blinking at the new icon that had joined the others, your brain power screeching to a stop at the name of it.

Jesus wept.

“ULTRON?!”

#snarky is writing #ultron #ultron x reader #reader x ultron #filled prompt

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