#LOVE HIM LOTS BUT?? LIKE??? WHAT THE FUCK ARE HIS SHAPES
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heesimp · 1 day ago
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sunghoon removing the condom mid sex because 1) he honestly couldn't care less 2) he genuinely believes he has rights to do so simply bc he wants to 🤷‍♀️ 3) you're too dumb on his dick to even notice that.. not until he cums inside ofc but it's not like you can do anything against his strength and big frame even if you wanted to
condom removal is so hot and I would do a lot for sunghoon to cum inside of me without protection 😩 make me creamy goddamn
note: this work contains themes of noncon and should not be replicated, and if this happens outside of the realm of fiction then it is considered sexual assault.
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Sunghoon knows he loves to have sex but he thinks you might like it even more than he does.
Neither of you are committed to one another but somehow, you find yourself in bed with him twice a week and don’t have an issue if he shows up your place unannounced. Sunghoon isn’t pushy and understands if you’re not available when he wants you to be. The respect is probably the reason why you agreed to start hooking up with him regularly on the first place.
And like, your birth control is always there to save you but you like using condoms for that extra layer of safety. Sunghoon always brought condoms with him whenever the two of you would meet up and the one time he didn’t have any was the first time he experiences having sex with you without that protective rubber.
He can’t get enough and dreams of your wet pussy against his bare cock. It makes Sunghoon hard every single time he thinks about seeing how tight you gripped him when he didn’t use condoms. He doesn’t ever want to go back.
Sunghoon has you on your hands and knees with your cheek pressed into the mattress. You’re almost sure you might be drooling and your hair fans across your face as he pounds into you with one knee on the bed. His other foot holds him up for stability as he fucks you like that.
“Tightest pussy in the world,” he moans loudly, too lost in the pleasure of seeing his cock drilling in and out of you, even with the protective sheen preventing him from truly feeling you.
You’re too gone to hear what he’s saying but his dick feels so big and good inside of you. You moan wildly and feel your own voice vibrate in your chest the more Sunghoon pushes and pulls against you.
“You like my cock?”
“I love it,” you choke out.
“Yeah, baby? Like it when my big dick fucks this tight hole?”
“Fuck me harder!”
Sunghoon’s crouches on the bed, using your body for balance ad both of his feet plant onto the mattress. He’s got a grip on your waist and squeezes when he feels you clenching around him. The new angle feels divine because his heavy, warm balls rest right against your pussy. He gives an experimental swing and you curse loudly when his balls smack against your clit.
“Oh, you like that?” Sunghoon pushes into you again. “You look so sexy beneath me. Makes me want to put babies in you.”
“N-No,” you stutter, trying to shake your head.
Sunghoon begins to push into you deeper. “No? You don’t want my cum? You don’t want it to take? But your pussy feels so good, baby.” His words make you moan and clench around him again.
“F-Fuck, Sunghoon!”
The echoing sounds of his balls slapping against your pussy makes Sunghoon’s eyes roll to the back of his head. He looks down to see the shape of your naked body and twitches right inside of you, which makes you squirm beneath him and the arch of your back crumbles in erotic pleasure.
Your pussy squeezes him a little too hard until you push him out but Sunghoon doesn’t mind. He grins at your wet hole and leans back to pull your bottom half into an arch again by pushing your legs together. You feel his tongue rub itself all over your folds and grip the bedsheets below you the more his wet muscle slides over your sensitive areas. Sunghoon flicks your clit a few times and drags it over the surface, making you moan right into his pillows.
He pulls away to give your pussy a smack. “Such a dirty girl, huh? Your pussy looks so cute when I’m using it.”
Sunghoon licks up another stripe before pulling himself upright. You don’t see him but you feel the bed moving underneath you as Sunghoon pulls your legs together again until your thighs are pressed against one another. He cages you in with his knees and you hear him jerking off with one hand while the other grips your ass and pulls each cheek apart to reveal your tight pussy.
“Your ass is phenomenal,” he complements as he twists his wrists while you close your eyes and bite your lip.
Sunghoon stays like that for a minute, admiring your asscheeks as you gush at the sound of his cock against the condom. You want nothing more than for him to stick his cock back in and start to think about the moments just prior when his balls slapped your pussy lips and sent you straight to heaven.
Your thoughts are cut off when you hear the sound of rubber smacking. Your heartbeat picks up at the familiar sound and start to turn around when Sunghoon pushes his tip back and forth over your folds, confirming your suspicions. The condom is gone.
“Suchhhh a nice pussy,” he groans as the wetness splashes onto his bare dick. “Makes me so horny.”
Your mouth hangs open the more Sunghoon pushes his cock inside of you, burying himself inch by inch until he’s so deep that you feel his balls just underneath your ass. He puts both of his palms beside you and pulls himself away from your body just to push back in.
You panic underneath him but moan simultaneously. Your heartbeat races at the sensation of his bare dick as Sunghoon twists his hips to angle himself deeper than he was before while your mouth hangs open, a string of moans pouring from the back of your throat.
“Your body’s gonna make me cum,” Sunghoon grunts. You close your eyes shut and clench around him in bursts when he speaks, making him moan deeply into the open air. He reaches over to his side and places the used condom on your left asscheek as he uses his hands to spread you apart, grunting at the sight of him invading your hole.
Sunghoon doesn’t give you any time to object or react and it feels too good to say something now. He stutters as his hips become faster and rougher before he’s gripping your asscheeks and digging his fingernails into your meaty flesh, his big cock lodged so deep into your pussy that you swear you’re in another dimension. He cums with his eyes focus on your hole and moans the second he sees it bubble out of you.
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tbshorts · 2 days ago
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Turtwig and Torterra are almost perfect. Grotle........ is also there.
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Chimchar really doesn't look like much, but Infernape absolutely rips
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Piplup is easily the best gen 4 starter, Empoleon is practically a legendary
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Video scripts below the cut
Turtwig:
Ah, the worst gen 4 starter - I'm kidding! I'm kidding. It's only second worst. It's a simple concept, executed well: what if a tortoise was also the seed of a plant, and as the tortoise grows, so does the tree on its shell. It recalls the idea of world turtles, the best cosmological concept, which is also hinted at in Torterra's pokédex entries.
But, right, Turtwig - like most starters it's mostly designed to be cute, with its broad smiling jaw and oversized upper lip and chibi proportions. The lil' twig with the two leaves on the head is just adorable, it's the pokémon version of a propeller hat, and I'm really charmed by it.
As for Grotle, well, middle stages are often awkward, and with its weird almost caterpillar body shape and two… bushes(?) on the back, it looks a bit half-finished. It really could have done more to imply a flowering garden on its back, it looks too barren.
Torterra, though? Fuck yeah, Torterra, this pokémon is so fucking cool. A giant tortoise with legs like tree trunks and claws made of boulders, and hills and trees perched upon its back, that RULES. My only criticism is that it is way too small in-game. If it was Wailord sized, it'd be S-tier.
Grade: A
Chimchar
Chimchar is probably the weakest design among the starters, both it and Monferno never really transcend just being… monkeys with fire on their tails. Chimchar has the… well it's supposed to be the shape of a small ember on its head, but let's be real, it looks like a poop, and there just isn't enough THERE to make it more than what it seems on the surface.
Monferno at least has the blue and red face markings, slightly recalling the idea of a mandrill, which is cool, and a bit of that wild white collar, which, okay, that's something, but it still barely looks special - if anything it looks like a first-stage evolution, honestly.
Infernape, thankfully, makes up for a LOT of lost ground. The billowing fire hair gives it a sense of dynamism, the powerful red crest on the face makes it look tough, the bright white is striking and the decorative gold pads on its body recalls how divinity is often decorated in Asian art. It's trite to compare every mystical monkey to Sun Wukong, but it does feel like some of him or Hanuman is in here, the design has a ton of charisma. And I really like that it remains slim, it looks agile, quick, clever, and more than a little mischievous. Weak pre-evolution designs are worth it to get to here.
Grade: B
Piplup is easily the best gen 4 starter, Empoleon is practically legendary
Piplup is the cutest gen 4 starter and also the best designed, this lil' guy is such an instant and immediate charmer. Being a baby penguin, how could it not be, but also the way that its blue markings are "fastened" on its beak and cascade down into a cloak hanging over its shoulders gives it a real "preschool kid in a raincoat" vibe that I love, and the two "buttons" on the tummy like it's wearing overalls just… god it's cute.
Prinplup avoids the awkwardness of middle stage evolutions, looking both cute with its plump little body, buttons and tailcoat, like a kid wearing his first fancy suit, but also like it's fast and powerful, thanks to those sleek fins and the head crest.
Empoleon, meanwhile… like holy shit, this thing looks like a LEGENDARY. The beak extending into a shape which is both a crown AND a trident is genuinely brilliant design, the picture of a nautical ruler. The stippling on the white marking makes it look like a fancy cravat of a king or prince, the hard edges of its collar look at once regal and dangerous, like it could slice you to piece with it, and together with those shield-like hard fins gives it an air of invulnerability almost. This thing is INTIMIDATING, it's regal, it's powerful, it's amazing!
Grade: S
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meelusinee · 7 hours ago
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AN OPERA HOUSE ☆ T.N X READER
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in which you’re Theo's girlfriend and went to visit him on tour.
pairing: singer!theodore nott x singer!reader
tags: band!au, mostly fluff
word count: 2.6k
warnings: none, just fluff! (and mattheo getting water bottles thrown his way)
author’s note: my first post! for starters, i made a small playlist for this fic if you’d like to check it out. theodore, who i imagine as a cigarettes after sex singer. secondly, while english is my first (and only) language, that does not mean i claim it in any way shape or form (aka this will probably suck ass)
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AN OPERA HOUSE | T.N x SINGER!READER
God, he hated interviews.
The lights that were blaring in Theodore’s face, along with the sound of people walking around both in front and behind the set, were really starting to piss him off. Theo didn’t know how Enzo and Mattheo did it, both of them smiling bright as if they were having a nice fuck or smoking a rather heavy cigarette.
Theodore really could use a cigarette right now. Either that, or you.
Thoughts of nicotine and you had been running rampant in his mind ever since he had to leave you for his national tour, the tour that celebrated the release of the band’s newest album Cigarettes After Sex. A debut of sorts, Theodore wasn’t really sure what to call it. If he were to name it anything, he’d want to name it his love letter to you. But Mattheo had said he couldn’t do that, so he stuck with the band name.
“Today is a rather special day for you, isn’t it?”
Theodore’s mind zoned back in as Blaise gently nudged his leg, his posture straightening up as the interviewer finally started asking questions. Perhaps they needed time to make the lights even brighter, Theo thought, his hand moving to cover the frown growing on his face. 
“Very special indeed,” Mattheo said, his signature smirk that got a lot of people involved with the band plastered on his face. “We just released an album, did you hear?”
“Yes, I did!” the interviewer said, smiling brightly as she adjusted the notes in her hand. “I was hoping we could ask you some questions about it, the musical process and making it mostly.”
Theo hummed non-committedly as the rest of them nodded their heads. Questions about music production didn’t sound too bad compared to a media interrogation.
“Do you mind if we did an introduction?” the lady asked, her fingers patting the cards.
“Course not love,” Blaise said, waving his hand casually as he sat up straighter. Theodore rolled his eyes, looking down at the ground. Blaise was always the biggest player out of the four of them. And that said a lot, seeing as though Mattheo Riddle was in the band as well. 
Theodore watched as the cameras focused in on each of them, the interviewer putting her cards down momentarily to introduce them to the show. “Today is a very special day for all of us, I can imagine.” she said, smiling as she made some sort of dramatic hand gesture towards them. “Today, I’m here with the members of Cigarettes after Sex. We’re going to ask questions about their newest album.”
“I’m so excited.” Lorenzo squeaked, straightening up as he and Mattheo made funny faces to the camera.
“I wanted to start with the first question I had, which was how working on the album went.” she started almost instantly, sitting up a bit straighter. Theo rather appreciated that about her. “I mean, there’s four people in your band, and a lot of timing and other issues that you’d have to work on together. Does that stuff come easier to you than to others, do you think?”
“I think we work pretty well together, right?” Lorenzo asked, leaning forward to look at the other three before smirking in Theo’s direction. “Other than Mr. Grumpy over there, he gets pissy a lot.”
“Oh definitely.” Mattheo said, smirking as he ruffled Theo’s hair. “But it’s okay, because he writes us songs and mothers us whenever we drink. We love him very dearly.”
“It’s not my fault you decide to get concerningly drunk almost every time we hit a bar.” Theo grumbled, sitting up a bit straighter as he prepared to answer the question seriously. “We work as a team a lot of the time, especially when it comes to music. The only non-negotiable is the lyrics, which I write by myself. Other than that though, it’s free reign.”
“So things like instruments and rhythm are all decided by everyone in the band collectively?” the interviewer asked.
“Pretty much,” Blaise explained. “Usually Mattheo and Enzo make a starting beat for songs, and Theo and I usually build guitar chords off of that. Theo here has most of the control with singing though, rhythm and stuff.”
“That’s really cool.” the interviewer nodded. “I wish my family had that amount of coordination during the holidays.”
The four of them chuckled at varying degrees, with Mattheo winking at the interviewer after. “Maybe if we came over we could give you some pointers.”
“That sounds really lovely, actually.” she said, the comment obviously getting to her. Her cheeks became visibly more flushed, fingers tapping faster against her notes. “I wanted to ask you guys a little bit about the lyrics though, if you don’t mind.”
And here we go.
“That’s all Theo’s field.” Lorenzo said, all three of their fingers dramatically pointing at the top of Theo’s head. He really felt like walking out for a smoke, and maybe burning them all with the ashes out of spite for their existence. But he wasn’t going to let them know that.
“Now, I’m sure you can guess where this is headed,” she chuckled softly, flipping one of her flashcards over. “I was wondering what the inspiration for your songs was. Do you have a muse or anything of the sort?”
Theodore sighed, feeling the moment almost pause in time as he tried to think of an answer. He very much did have a muse, you were waiting at home in his bed. Even still, he wasn’t sure if he wanted that public. Especially since the both of you were rather quiet creatures.
He supposed it couldn’t hurt too much though.
“I do,” he whispered, clearing his throat after he spoke. He didn't realize how choked he would sound speaking. “Yeah, she’s really pretty.”
“Theo’s got a girlfriend!” Mattheo teased, poking Theo’s cheek teasingly. “He’s got a girlfriend who he loves very much. That woman has stolen his heart from me!”
“For shame of her, the audacity even.” Blaise chuckled amusedly, both Mattheo and Enzo playing a heartbroken bit. Theo smirked softly as Mattheo dramatically rested his head on Lorenzo’s shoulder, fake sobs escaping his mouth as they mourned over the loss of a non-existent relationship. 
“You’ll be fine.” Theo said, gently patting Mattheo’s back.
“I’ll never recover from this.” he sniffled, sitting up a bit straighter. “Mark my words.”
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It was a midsummer night, the sweltering heat doing nothing to deter the line of fangirls waiting at the entrance gates. The muggy and dense air seemed to surround everyone with a humid blanket, every bit of contact made as they tried to get through the doors like a match on gasoline. The concerts you went to weren’t usually this crowded and suffocating. 
Then again, you usually never went to such well known-bands.
Luckily for you, you had been able to sneak a VIP seat ticket for the higher tip-tops of the opera house, a fitting venue for the band that was playing tonight. Cigarettes After Sex was flashing on the monitor they had set up near the back of the stage, the camera zoomed in to focus on the currently empty microphone stand. 
Voices filled the area as everyone began to take their seats, some people pushing and shoving as they made their way around with water and sneaked in alcohol. Some of them had on merch for the band, some of them didn’t. Most of them wore darker clothes though, lots of black with leather jackets and heavy boots.
Your eyes zoned in on the screen as the lights began to dim, the voices all hushing as four men walked out onto the stage. Lorenzo Berkshire was the drummer, one of the most well-known band drummers that you could name off the top of your head. Mattheo Riddle was already stationed by the keyboards, his unruly curls already a little damp from the humidity inside the room. Blaise Zabini walked out with his bass guitar in hand, a role you knew he took on just so he could look hot while strumming the strings. Then came out Theodore Nott. 
Your boyfriend.
You could tell that the heat was affecting him the least out of all of the band members, his waterline covered in the tiniest bit of eyeliner. You smiled softly as you recalled the memory of putting eyeliner on him when you two first started dating, the giggling fit the both of you had broken out into as the other three begged you to do their eyeliner as well. 
He looked beautiful in the lighting too, his outfit framing his figure in an almost holy light. You were almost tempted to start writing a song about it right then and there. But now wasn’t your time, now was the time of the band.
You supposed the band thought the same thing as well, Blaise’s fingers beginning the strum the opening of their most popular song. Theo made his way up to the microphone stand, smiling softly at the crowd as he began to sing. His voice was just as angelic as his face, echoing through the opera house like the ghost of a long forgotten lover. He had completely captivated the room, the silence barely just quieter than the sound of his voice. 
“Your lips, my lips,” you smiled softly as he sang the lyrics, leaning your head on your hand. “Apocalypse.”
You remember the time when he wrote that song. Your tongue was barely darted out as you tried to focus on not messing up the edges of a painting you had been working on, the brush trembling with your hands focused. It was a galaxy, the blues and purples blending together in a  jaw-dropping beauty of a display. Mattheo had come into the room as you finished, a low whistle escaping his mouth as he glanced over at it.
“Looks like an apocalypse.”
Apparently, those words had rung through Theo’s mind for the week after that. He eventually sat you down on the bed, pulling out his guitar as he began to sing the lyrics to you. They needed a bit of polishing with the rhythm, his fingers plucking the wrong strings at times as he sang. But it was one of the most beautiful pieces you had heard regardless, tears welling in your eyes as you moved to hug him. That hug also ran through Theo’s mind for yet another week, in which he had apparently produced an entire studio album based on you. 
You smiled softly as the end of the song came about, the final string echoing through the silent theatre. Theo had gone to grab a bottle of water by the speaker, his eyes locking onto yours.
You winked playfully, smiling at the blush that covered his features. You also just remembered that he had not expected you at the tour. 
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“You need to come get your lover boy,” were the words that rang through your phone speaker as you tried to press it against your ear.
“What?” you asked again, pen in your hand as you spoke.
“I said,” Mattheo’s voice rang through the speaker. “You need to come get your lover boy. He is really depressed right now, like, really. He’s missing you terribly and is currently refusing to work because of it.”
You heard him and Blaise beginning to argue in the background, the both of them knowing that Theo would eventually get up. But Mattheo seemed to think that you being there would solve every single one of his problems.
“I don’t know if I can go, Mattheo,” you mumbled, placing your notebook down. “I doubt I could get a spontaneous ticket.”
“Don’t worry about that,” he said. “I already sent a driver to pick you up, he’ll be there in about 10 minutes. I’m just calling to let you know.”
“You what?” you said, looking at the phone incredulously. “Mattheo, I don’t have any time to pack! What would I wear?”
“You say that as if Theo won’t buy you a whole wardrobe based on you liking a single piece of jewelry!” Mattheo said back, groaning as Blaise called for him. “I gotta go, make sure you get in that car and come over. He’s really, really missing you.”
“Mattheo, I swear to Merlin.” you began, but didn’t have any time to finish as you heard the beeping at the end of the line. 
(divider)
“Is that amore mio?” Theo asked Blaise incredulously, looking over at the other three before catching Mattheo’s smirk. “Oh, you bastard.”
“You were missing her!” he said, running away from the keyboard so Theo could throw water at him. “It's not my fault you got depressed!”
“She is meant to be resting, testa di cazzo!” Theo said, sighing as he put the bottle down. No doubt that would be clipped in magazine headers across the country. Theo looked over at you, a soft smile coming on his face when you came into vision. You still had that smile on your face, if not brighter now that you were giggling. He smiled back, picking up his microphone again.
“For our next song,” he spoke into the microphone, placing it back on the stand. “I think it’d be rather nice to sing something about the building we’re in as well. Something about the opera house.” he said, smirking softly as the crowd of fans began cheering. The lights dimmed again as the music began playing, his eyes closing as he let it run through his soul.
“Built an opera house for you in the deepest jungle,” he began, the music coursing through his veins. The words flowed out of him like a waterfall, his voice sweet as candy as he began walking back and forth at the front of the stage. Though every time the chorus hit he found himself in the middle, eyes focused on yours as he sang the lyrics. 
“I was meant to love you, and always keep you in my life. I was meant to love you, I knew I loved you at first sight.”
The lights cut off completely as the equipment turned off, a smile growing on Theo’s face as the end of the concert came. 
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“Theo!” you squeaked as you saw him, waddling up to him like a happy penguin as you embraced him in a hug. You hadn’t seen him in over two weeks, the longest either of you had ever spent apart. “I never want to abandon you ever again.”
“If anyone was doing the abandoning, it was me.” he chuckled, his arms wrapping around you as he kissed your forehead lovingly. “I missed you so much principessa,” 
“I missed you too,” you mumbled, burying your face in his chest. “Teddy.”
“Are you calling me a teddy bear?” he chuckled softly, pulling away from the hug to cup your face lovingly. His eyes were filled with devotion you only thought possible in dreams and fairytales, that was until you eventually met him at least. 
“Yes I am.” you smiled softly.
“You are ridiculous.” he chuckled softly, pressing his lips against yours as he caressed your cheeks lovingly. “Merlin, I love you.”
“I love you too.” she whispered lovingly. 
The two of you stood comfortably in the silence, wrapped in a hug neither wanted to leave. That was until Mattheo popped in.
“Told you that you missed her!”
His face had rather quickly met two empty water bottles. 
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AUTHOR'S NOTE
thank you so much for reading! i got kind of lazy during the end of this, i'm not going to lie to you (it's three am), but! if you want more of these two lovely beauties i might maybe make a part two! (i originally drafted this with reader as a singer in mind, so if you'd like to be singing some adrianne lenker songs to theo just let me know)
please like and comment and all that jazz, i practically live off of validation at this point.
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timkontheunsure · 1 day ago
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I think people too often conflate toxic and abusive relationships.
One of my last exs and I were a bad fit, because of where we were. He was mid trauma of AFAB, and I'd only seen abusive romantic relationships so I put up a lot that I shouldn't. (Every red flag was just a flag to me).
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We were desperately clinging to eachother, trying to put up with the hurt to save the other. Because we feel like we were eachothers life jacket.
We were toxic together because our trauma landmines made us hurt eachother without knowing were were doing it.
But we weren't abusive, because that carries intent. We're still extremely close friends, and both of us are still hurt by what we did to eachother because it was fucked.
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But abuse is a decision. One that's normally makes the abuser own life easier. Like Stella using Stolas' SA as a funny anecdote, to isolate him from being able to make friends at the party. (Their kid is 17 but Stella still using his dissociation to keep him from a support network 18 years later).
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Or her deciding to kill him for he embarrassed her in front of her friends. Because if he's of not use to her, she might as well get some fun from his torture and murder. She can't (won't) give him a divorce, because him getting to walk away and have a good life would be her lossing.
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It's not Blitz yelling that he's overwhelmed or not mentioning Striker's first attempt, and it's not Stolas' calling Blitz his "impish little play thing" or kissing BTB.
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Because they weren't meaning to hurt eachother with those.
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Blitz screaming and kicking in door is very triggering for Stolas. And not telling him someone wants him dead nearly got the job done, but Blitz through Stolas safe because he's immortal.
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Stolas' calling Blitz a plaything and other microaggressions make Blitz feels like a fetish and looked down apon.
But Stolas doesn't understand the privilege he has, and is really that thick that he doesn't understand he's being demeaning.
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Again still very fucked up things to do, but they didn't sit down and plot 'how can I hurt this person mwahaha'. They genuinely care, and are both trying to cling to the other because their drowning. Drowning people don't try to hurt someone helping them, but you can get pulling under all the same.
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Abusers aren't the person who could drag you under by accident, their the fucker that ordered you out of the lifeboat in the first place. And get their fun kicking you back in anytime you start to get a grip on away out of the water.
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I've ended up chatting with people about gaslighting Vs real memory issues before. Real memory issues won't all convenient work for their good. And yer gaslighting is done on purpose. It's done to undermine your reality, and shape it to something helpful for the abuser.
You can have all the evidence in the world, that they were being a git; but when you try to point it out it's like trying to make an argument on shifting sand.
And if you do manage to call them on it, don't be surprised that they'll go right back to the version that makes them look best next time it comes up.
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This looks like how Stella is framing the arranged marriage and divorce to her kid (trailer). It's gone from neither of them loved eachother to Stolas never loving Stella.
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Like how Andrealphus makes Stolas' "cheating" into something that can be used to try and get more money.
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Instead of something all 3 of them know Stella doesn't really care about other than it makes her image look bad.
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Stolitz can work through this together, becoming something other than toxic; because they do care about and love eachother. And work to not keep hurting eachother moving falwards, it won't change that they have hurt eachother in the past.
But unlike unlike with an abuser they do want the best for eachother other.
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I was just scrolling through my dash and found a post that really made me think.
This is a vent type post so it's below the cut if you don't want to read that. Also spoilers for Helluva Boss.
It was criticizing people who like the stolitz ship because "stolas and blitz are abusers" and that immediately made the ship wrong.
First of all, it really made me pause and think about the media literacy of people who watch shows like Helluva or Hazbin but can't look deeper than the character's direct actions. Yes, they're both assholes. But there's far more to it than that. Both of them have been fundamentally changed and affected by the ways they were raised; Blitz is avoidant of love and affection because his dad used him for money and his mom died in a fire he was blamed for. His best friend and love interest shunned him for years over a misunderstanding and everyone he loved turned their backs on him, his own sister included. Whereas Stolas is a prince who was in a very abusive arranged marriage and has this idea of love that comes from operas and movies, a very over exaggerated "shout it from the rooftops" rose-tinted shades type of love that quite frankly is impossible in our world and the show's. His relationship was horrible and he escaped into the worlds of movies and songs, and this gave him an unrealistic view of love.
Second, acting like people can't be shitty in relationships and still love one another is ignorant. Personal vent below.
I have a long term boyfriend; and we recently had a very heated fight because we both wanted things from the other that we couldn't communicate clearly. We both said hurtful things that we didn't mean. It doesn't make us abusive; it makes us human. People aren't perfect.
I feel like this criticism struck a particular nerve for me because I myself relate a lot to Blitz. I was in an abusive relationship, and that kind of thing changes you in ways you can't really describe to other people. I became very codependent and reserved, and after the relationship finally ended I felt even more lost than when I was in it (similar to Blitz fighting for his "relationship" with Stolas back, despite knowing it's unhealthy) because I had become so used to the chaos that calm felt like a threat.
You can say hurtful things and not be an abuser. Stolas is absolutely completely non self aware and he said hurtful things to Blitz because of it. That doesn't make him this horrible caricature of an abuser. He literally doesn't know any other method of love. He doesn't understand how his actions affect Blitz because he's a damn prince. Of course he's going to be out of touch and self-important. It also doesn't make him innocent.
Neither of them are innocent. They were both assholes to one another. But that doesn't make them abusers. Good lord people
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killkillkill
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quietwingsinthesky · 1 year ago
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Dean is such a paradox for me because on the one hand, I have been actively triggered by him in the show, there are moments where, intentionally or not, the writers managed to create a portrayal of manipulation and abuse and control issues that it sets off actual alarms for me. And on the other hand, I would not have him any other way. There is something — not comforting, that’s too soft a word — about knowing where Dean’s actions stem from, having seen and learned all that we do about his childhood neglect and parentification and the trauma he goes through repeatedly in the show, and that he doesn’t come out clean. He comes out a goddamn mess who ends up hurting the people around him in reaction to his own pain!
There’s a reality there that’s. Almost nice, actually. Distressing to watch, but it is a fucking mess, it’s a good mess! He’s got zero healthy coping skills and a healthy relationship with say, his brother, is terrifying because it leaves him open to abandonment!
I’m not sure I’m wording this correctly. There is a way to be a good abuse victim. Take the pain, martyr yourself on it, and then, even if you have no support or idea how to, then you have to become a Good Person who never hurts anyone the way you have been learning to your entire life. Simply toss everything that shaped you out the door and emerge a saint with a tragic backstory. And Dean is not that. And that’s so fucking good. Everything that he has gone through continues to effect the way he treats the people around him, and he can’t fight the behaviors he might recognize as harmful because he also sees them as protecting him (or protecting Sam by keeping Sam with him.)
And sometimes, idk. It feels good to see a guy who didn’t heal the “right way.” Who mostly didn’t heal at all, just keeps the wound open because it’s easier that way.
#there’s a whole other bit to this about how like. it’s hard for fandom to hold the idea that someone can be both a victim and abusive#at the same time. that the ways someone has been hurt don’t always shape them into kindness and wide-eyed sympathy. occasionally it just#makes them hard to live with. and I think most obviously is the thing that a lot of what Dean does is an expression of love. of protection.#he’s very much his father’s son in that way. that’s why Sam. the guy he’s been Told to protect his whole life. is also the person he ends up#hurting the most. it’s tragedy. it’s realistic. it’s a good fucking mess.#and that’s why I don’t get interpretations of dean that are determined to shave off the ugly parts of his character. to me those are the#parts that make him a character worth revisiting. he’s so full of love. and he uses it to hurt people. he means to sometimes. a lot of the#time he doesn’t but hurts them anyway. he has been shaped by violence his whole life. and it’s just. I get why someone might take this#part of him away. to make him easier to love. because I get that he’s stressful to watch also like I get that. but he is.#he is compelling. in his anger and his controlling behavior and his strangling love. he is compelling in all the ways he has become this.#Dean’s degradation into these behaviors can be both a failure of a show that ran to long but also the believable trajectory of a man who#can’t heal. and I love him for that. I love him for emerging from pain as a angry sharp thing. I love that it brings the glimpses of him#being gentler and recognizing his actions as bad into stark relief. I love that this recognition often only lasts until he is hurt again and#then he backpedals into the safety of behaviors he knows will allow him to control a situation through force or manipulation.#it’s good fucking mess. you know? dean winchester everybody.#maybe I should have put all that in the main post. oh well. too late now.#spn#dean winchester#tw abuse
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frecklystars · 3 months ago
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I’m at my theater job rn and it’s my first shift all by myself. Super nervous!!! But I’m planning to make!!!! hundreds of dollars!!!! so I can!!!! buy myself a cameo for my birthday!!!!! (That’s the hope anyway lol) wish me luck!!!!!
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sforzesco · 1 year ago
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‘Is there a point to any of this or do you just want to see how much more I can take?’ snaps Crassus. ‘Oh, I knew there was still some bite left in you,’ says Cethegus, thrilled. Cethegus teaches Crassus the art of politics and the ways of business. Sulla is not a fan.
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Sulla: the Last Republican, Arthur Keaveney
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Crassus, Catilina, and the Vestal Virgins, Ronald Syme
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Sulla: the Last Republican, Arthur Keaveney
#WAHOO i had a lot of fun writing the comic arc for these three#absolute nightmare dynamic from hell#cethegus has a line trying to figure out what crassus likes before realizing that it's less a matter of preference and more that sulla#got to him first. and you never forget. uh. the guy who unmakes you and leaves you rendered raw or something#like everything after is this weird intersection of love and hate and revisiting old wounds because they're familiar and feel like home#AU cethegus chokes crassus with a rosary because sulla choked him with a chain necklace that had his patron saint on it#same thing. you can never go back home but you can press on the bruise and the satisfaction is the same#tldr; crassus is just so fucking weird about sulla it is in the marrow of his bones. odi et amo. outliving someone is the ultimate payback#build on top of their bones like they built on top of you.#hang on. what is it. lucullus calling pompey a vulture. same with sulla and crassus only crassus won't say it#he'll kick out pompey's legs from under him for doing the same thing tho. only one person gets to treat you like that and so forth#komiks tag#drawing tag#roman republic tag#publius cornelius cethegus#lucius cornelius sulla felix#marcus licinius crassus#that other guy with crassus is cassius' father probably. or some guy. there are so many guys#OH cethegus is kind of driving a knife into the sulla shaped hole in crassus' ribcage by greeting him while he's out with sulla#he's doing that on purpose. it's like. it's fine. he's also doing it to annoy sulla.#what are sulla's feelings on the matter? well. he's responsible for the eyebrow scar crassus has. so.#hi to everyone who read these tags. crassus is a psychosexual mess. please clap for sulla.
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feline-evil · 7 months ago
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Dick or no dick confirmation Pickles was always going to be trans to me anyways; if he's swingin' somethin that's phallo babes, if he's not then his t-dick fat. What's not to get.
#metalocalypse#jay talkin#I'm sorry they wrote that awful gross little man far too likeable and relatable to on a trans level#for me not to hoot and holler and cheer for the trans pickles agenda#changes nothing about his character arc or any of the show anyone is capable of being the kind of person he is#don't make the mistake of thinking thats exclusive to cis men#his transness wouldnt change that#only adds on an extra layer to him that i think works fantastically.#Listen that dude was rejected by his family driven to drink and drugs young to escape that ran away to be in a band#is called fucking Pickles of all things and refuses to tell anyone his real last name;#over the span of four seasons and two movies he slowly starts to learn to be for others what he never had#he becomes more caring more supportive#it's not a stretch to say he undoes some of the toxic masculinity he's been keeping himself shielded behind#and learns how to be a kinder man.#all of which have no contradictions with him being trans!#In fact it doesn't take much extra thought to find ways a lot of this can line up with some trans masculine experiences#i mean. Did no one else have a younger phase where they swung as far as they could into crass rude and uncaring ways#to try and assert their masculinity only to grow and realise that you can be a man and be more caring.#Did no one else have father issues. 1 800 come on now i know those are both shared experiences a lot of us have had LOL.#at the end of the day this show aired nearly 20 years ago and is finished. we're not getting more of it#so nothing is altered nor changed if pickles is canonically trans or not ok. its fine#i mean hell i dont even need canon confirmation hes trans to me and thats all i care abt#but i think if yr getting suuuuuper weird abt needing him not to be canonically trans you have some issues#and bio essentialist ideals of gender if you think only a cis man can act like he does#again. anyone can be like that. its not exclusive. him being trans would not change him in any way shape or form lol#AND ALSO GODDDUUUGH for once i love getting to see a guy pushing 50 whos depicted as trans#do you have any idea how dire and barren it is out here. we never get to see a trans guy older than 30 and whos not a pristine model#I WANT MORE OLD SHLUBBY SHITHEAD TRANS GUYS IN MEDIA
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sunbunnyyy · 2 months ago
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lan xichen is not a perfect human being. he is an older brother who is Going Through Some Shit by the end of the novel. did he always make good choices?? no!! have you????
#i’m having a supremely difficult time with the Xichen haters commenting on wi3.#like all mdzs characters i feel that he’s an incredibly nuanced character#the idea of hating xichen feels so fucking foreign to me because ultimately he just care he brother#no matter what shape that brother takes#lan xichen#mdzs#deep breath#WE ARE NOT OUR MISTAKES AND WEI WUXIAN IS THE BIGGEST MOST GLARING EXAMPLE OF THIS#AND THE FACT THAT YOU CAN RECOGNIZE THIS BUT NOT THAT XICHEN SAID A MEAN THING WHEN HE WAS UPSET AND HIS WORLD WAS CRUMBLING#SAYS A LOT MORE ABOUT YOU AND YOUR SKEWED POV#IF WWX ISNT UPSET ABOUT BEING CALLED LWJS MISTAKE BECAUSE HE REALIZES THERES MORE IMPORTANT SHIT TO HE WORRIED ABOUT#RATHER THAN XICHENS ANGY REMARKS THAT CLEARLY HAVE NO BASIS BECAUSE WWX OBVIOUSLY DIDNT REMEMBER#THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SO MAD ON HIS BEHALF#seriously the narrative puts SO LITTLE FOCUS ON THIS#laughably little#xichen wants his brother to be happy he doesn’t WANT to push wwx away#he wants wwx to recognize the fault he has and the blame he carries so that he will TREAT WANGJI APPROPRIATELY#so that he’ll stop being a dense motherfucker about his own feelings long enough to realize that wangji has been irrevocably in love#since the very beginning!!!#xichen ignored crimes that sucks#that’s a valid reason to critique his character#‘xichen ignored jgy’s crimes but not wwx’s and actively tried to sabotage wangxian’#no you’re wrong#xichen did not lead the lan to the burial mounds#stop confusing xichen for qiren#if wangji had successfully convinced wwx to return to gusu with him xichen would’ve done the shrug emote#sorry uncle! i have a new brother again!#foh with your xichen hate#i’m gonna be late for work bc of this rant but it needed to be said
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skeletalheartattack · 2 years ago
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ignoring realistic necessities like food, care, space, and medical attention, what video game enemy would you want to have as a pet ?
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if i had to choose. it'd be one of these three.
#ask#anon#i just really like creature designs with sharp teeth and simple shapes i think.#thats kinda why i designed Budd the way i did. simple shape with sharp.... mouth things. and one brushstroke for the eyes.#and overall shaped like a potato. or sausage. whatever.#im not sure (off the top of my head) what other enemy i'd pick for a pet#theres a lot of enemy designs i love. like clefts from paper mario. but those are like. people.#clanker from banjo is also a good design but. not an enemy. cant be a pet.#not because of like his size but because i think itd be fucked up to have him as a pet. put that dude in the ocean#if you had him as a pet. simply you'd be sent up into the air by my wicked blow and buddy you wouldnt be coming back down#banjo saw clanker and thought ''man i should really kill that witch for real actually''#like its one thing to steal his sister. thats whatever. thats small peas.#putting a big fucking awesome dude in a space and chaining him to an anvil. that witch has to be put under a rock#also let's also kill L.O.G. for what he did to clanker in nuts&bolts#like it was fucked up what Grunty had him live through. but what L.O.G. did. lets kill him#now keeping a plush of clanker? thats okay :) a plush of clanker would fucking rule#blahaj but made of metal and flesh. awesone#sorry. i like clanker a lot as a dude. hes cool. not a pet though. or else.#anyway sorry i dont have more options to grab from.#its like if prof oak gave you an option between three bulbasuars. guess im picking bulbasohar. im not backspacing.#anyway thank you for the ask anon :) ik its hard for me to pick between chain chomp chain chomp and chain chomp#but you understand#whatever
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doctorweebmd · 8 months ago
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coming out of my baldurs gate 3 delirium (aka i am working a night shift and can't physically play it. at work.) to say that horikoshi. horikoshi when i GET YOU. you are NOT leaving izuku with no quirk and no arms. i am in your walls
#bnha spoilers#also. more evidence that horikoshi read zero-sum game#like come on the twins thing the izuku losing his quirk thing the losing his arm thing the shiggy getting decay from afo thing#TELL ME THE TRUTH HORIKOSHI. DID YOU READ MY FANFIC.#i'm joking of course. he's just done a really good job of foreshadowing through the series. its a marker of an amazing author#and i know that izuku probably won't lose both his arms and his quirk. i fully expect it to be a happy ending in some way shape or form#this is a sixteen year old boy who sacrificed EVERYTHING. more than he ever had to give#and he had less than a year. LESS THAN A YEAR.#sorry i'm already crying thinking about the scene of him holding shigaraki's hand even though it will decay him........#izuku who knows better than ANYONE what shigaraki's power can do.... reaching out to him. caring more about others than about himself.#he's just. he's so good. he's SO GOOD. he deserves the world#tbh i feel like eri HAS to be involved at this point. she's the deus ex machina in all this#that or overhaul#both of their abilities can at least physically restructure izuku's body#it would actually be a very interesting redemption point for overhaul.......#i mean WHY ELSE RESCUE HIM. and why give him THE SAME FUCKING INJURY#what a powerful thing it would be to have eri give overhaul his arms back#and overhaul learning about goodness and forgiveness from this girl he's done nothing but abuse and torture#and saves izuku........#its about ATONEMENT. its about GROWTH. its about IT NEVER BEING TOO LATE.#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE YOU MY HERO ACADEMIA#... ok. i'm normal. its fine.#on another note#i loved the ending to my first bg3 run which i think i finished Tuesday/Wednesday. i cried.#IMMEDIATELY started a durge run where i'm playing a male human bard instead of the female half-wood elf ranger#i was like 'haha. i'll make a character based on hisoka from hxh! i'm gonna be SOOOO evil! >:))#and guess who still isn't good at being big evil. ME. at worst i'm probably chaotic neutral.#its wild i'm already finding SO MANY new scenes i missed on the first playthrough even though i'm making a lot of the same choices#so it still feels super fun and fresh. more so now because i kind of know the characters and the mechanics better#my current playthrough i'm with lae'zel shadowheart and asterion with no intention of switching out
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imissthefire · 1 year ago
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the forging bonds supports omfg 🥺
#soren#my dear boy#seeing him interacting with himself when he was at his lowest after he's had time to heal and recover from all he went through... my heart#child!soren#really just needs support and someone who can listen even tho he can't say a word... soren and ike taking care of him... uncle ranulf#everything about it#i'm weak over this you don't even know#brave!soren#has grows SO incredibly much and the fact others have remarked on it (ranulf) and that he's being more patient and more tolerant#like yeah he's still got his acerbic and not-quite-approachable personality but he's not just running from everything or pushing it all down#i know i already mentioned ike but omfg seeing his ''feed soren'' instinct pop back out and how reliving that must be so emotionally intense#he's seeing the man he's watched grow and heal so much at his weakest again? knowing he won't forget it this time? FUCK!#i've seen tonnes of people saying how he and soren are basically coparenting him and i love that sm because yeah.gif the little guy needs it#like their b support in por when soren mentions how he never had a parent to help shape who he was or how he never was shown that affection#they know that even if this soren goes back to his world one day that he will go back knowing what it feels like to be loved and cared for#and b!soren basically telling c!soren that he's going to be okay eventually? CRYING IN THE CLUB#sure he didn't say that verbatim but yk. it's gotta hurt a lot to see himself in this position again i don't blame him for being cold to him#fuck!#i could go on#but i will call it here bc i will write an essay nobody asked for#maybe i will anyway in another post#or mayb consider actually posting my writing and put together a lil fic if i'm feeling bold 👀#either way#gabe rambles#fe#feh#fe heroes#cyl 7#fe9/10#nqp
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buysomecheese · 2 years ago
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I want a dissertation on brotherhood in relation to birth order and senses of responsibility focusing on Eric Matthews and his relationship to school, sexuality, *homo*sexuality, and masculinity and how he projects/protects Cory through all of this and I want it NOW!
(Lots of fun little unorganized thoughts in tags <3)
#I feel like I could hella write that this summer#hmmm#thinking about what I'll want to major in starting fall '24 and I'll go into medicine eventually but an english major... looking pretty nic#for now at least#this specific topic is because I Love Eric Matthews like I'm only in s2 but he's so. he loves his siblings so so so much and it's so obviou#I've heard there's some contention btwn him and his father and ofc I've heard about Eric and Jack and AUGH it's gonna give me SO MUCH-#-material to work with! his relationship with Feeny is just starting to become what I've seen people talk about and! there are So many-#-implications with it I just!!#he's clearly such a good role model for Cory and very much wants to protect/guide him from some of the lesions in guidance allowed by their#-parents#(I'm an older brother and I See how much more my younger brother gets away with and I wasn't as good about it as Eric but I have tried-)#(-coparenting before and Eric is just so much more subtle/helpful with it. our age gaps are different which is def relevant but jfdhbdj)#clearly his failings in school act as a buffer for Cory's; clearly he's trying to watch out for Cor falling into the same dating traps-#-(they keep mirroring? hello??) clearly there's something abt friendship models as well#and we all know that shory is SO homoerotic and while his parents aren't like homophobes it's def Eric who's making jokes and treating it-#-so normally (esp! for a 90s show) that is makes me wonder how his friendships have been shaped by his attitudes towards platonic (?) male-#-sensuality/physicality. how his parents had acted in the past that Cor is unaware of (they are 4-5 yrs apart) that fucked up Eric and how-#-he's trying to protect Cor and how A&A are letting it slide more bc of how it fucked Eric. a lot of this is wishful projecting oops#(A&A is Amy & Alan)#and Eric is just so. comfortably masculine like he's such a little guy augh#all of the men in this show are so Generally positively masculine like even Harley is like that- he's amused by these little 7th graders-#-who can't seem to leave them alone and he threatens them a lot but after he saw Eric sticking up for Cor (+ Mr. Turner) he seems to-#-respect the whole family a lot more. and his respect/caring for TK is insane and his Freddie+Joey (clearly in love idc) are simply allowed#-to exist and are protected and supported by him- Harley (the closest we've seen to toxic masculinity so far barring maybe Alan but idk)#and don't even get me STARTED on Mr. Turner and Mr. Feeny ugh. those two + Cor OH SHIT they are the maid the mother the crone but men lowke#motifs of 3 (we started Brodeck's Report in eng today) and mirrors and foreshadowing etc etc#anyways that's why I'd focus on Eric bc I can't stop thinking abt EVERYONE and that would be Too long of an essay#parallels btwn Jason (or Jack we'll see)/Eric and Shawn/Cory could SO work with that#would not bring in GMW though that would also be Too long of an essay#pavloving myself into loving analysis of media bc of IB english <3 stockholm type beat
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rainbow-sparks · 2 years ago
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woah improvement???? :00
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these are redraws of these
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top ones are from Nov 30th 2022
old Greg is from like Jan 4th 2022 and old Beth is from like March 27th 2022
#I actually used a reference from the resent Beth picture#she looks a lot less happy because of how my hc have evolved#(what I mean by that is Elizabeth gets tormented by her brothers; Micheal's just an teen who never learned how to express emotions unless#through violence *YES I'M PROJECTING STFU D':* as for Crying Child; it's because jealousy *Mom loves her hates him* and just because Mike#has been doing the same to him since he was able to crawl :// Mike; William; and Lora*Mrs.Afton* all despise CC because another hc I have#*SA mention in this hc* CC was conceived from Lora's ex fiance assaulting her :/ he was arrested but CC looks like the pathetic man so...#constant reminder :/// oh well)#PROBLEMS WITH THE OLD DRAWINGS WHOOO; Gregory's face shape is a fucking circle and his hair looks like scribbles#SOME OF THE LINES DON'T EVEN CONNECT??? Same with Beth!!! I mean the face is a bit better but that's it#the bows don't match the shirt; cold colour warm colour; doesn't fit#also the shade of red looks horrible in it#I mentioned in the original post that she looks like Glen; Chucky's kid; I still think that#Gregory's old shirt is so ew#just ew#:///#why so many bandaids? I like the stickers though snickers are cool I like stickers:)))#wait wait wait why does he old have one ear??? :$#I don't remember the time for the old ones (probably about an hour or so each) but foe the recent they took like 2 hours :// yaay :/#I spent most of today drawing or trying to get enough of those stupid star things so I can do the last level on world 4 for super mario 3d#world (idfk know why the things are called; I haven't read much and haven't bothered to look it up; probably should though ://) anyway I#need 50 of them by only have...28? 20 somethings maybe 30 if I forgot to check becfore I turned the game off last time...idk man#I have been to school in 2 days which I'm fine with tbh but my dad is probably gonna make me go tomorrow (it's 10:44 as I type this so it's#not December yet; I don't have to say today; it isn't 12 yet)#I missed a while week once like the first week of November#:// anyway#the thing in redraw Gregory's picture is the panel of botton you use to repair Freddy#gregory fnaf#elizabeth afton#gregory fnaf sb
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webism · 1 month ago
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pornstar!choso has a curated look that throws off a lot of his costars. strong build, straight-set face, hands made to choke and tear… most of those he film with don’t expect to be doted on the entire time.
people joke that pornstar!choso falls a little bit in love with every costar he fucks or gets fucked by. that glossy look that always pulls at his face by the time a scene ends, how his lip trembles with a need to be kissed raw when he cums. he says it's just the bliss of his orgasm—that he gets emotional in the moment, but it doesn't mean anything. well, until he meets you.
pornstar!choso who looks you up before his shoot because your name sounded vaguely familiar when it left his agents lips. he could have sworn you'd fucked before, because when he rolls the syllables of your name on his tongue they're nostalgic and taste like the sweat and laboured breaths of a long night between satin sheets. had you shot a scene together before? or had it been a one night stand?
pornstar!choso who realises that no, he hadn't slept with you before. but the familiarity of your name isn't a coincidence—he's fucked his fist to your videos more times than he can count. your name hits him like lightning, he had typed it into his search bar late in the night, cock hard and in need of instant relief. it's almost scary how well he knows you, what sounds you make when you get close to cumming, how you often arch your back and try to run from the overwhelming pleasure, how your eyebrows knit together when you're feeling so good it almost hurts.
pornstar!choso who realises with a now-red face that you probably don't have a clue who he is, and yet he's cum in time with you for months now. he's pretty sure he's drained his wallet at least twice on your cam shows... what if you recognise his name and piece it together with his username that he donates under? he debates cancelling the shoot, faking covid to get some time at home to hate himself endlessly.
but pornstar!choso realises that this is his chance to get to know how you really feel. he's imagined it so many times, as he fucked fake pussies or his closed fist using spit or his own cum as lube. you'd be warmer, undoubtedly tighter... so much prettier. and he wants to know more: would you prefer to take control and turn him into the toys he so often pretends are you? would you lay back all pretty and let him ruin you on his cock? how deep could you take him he knows he's big but you seem so eager, would you take him to the base with ease or would he have to force it in? bully your pretty pussy until it stretches to his shape?
pornstar!choso who hates the fact that your first, and possibly only, time together would be in front of a production crew and under the unsympathetic lights of a porn set. but he'd fuck on a stage in front of thousands if it means a taste of you.
pornstar!choso who makes it to the shoot before you do, comes ten minutes early to settle his anxieties and get a feel for the scene ahead. the director tells him its a simple shoot, that choso is meant to let you ride him for a while until you pull off and suck his cock for a nice close-up facial shot. the way the director speaks so clinically about sex with you makes choso grimace, he feels pathetic for feeling like this. like he'll be a changed man after feeling you around his cock, which is already painfully hard.
pornstar!choso who hates himself for stumbling over his words when he meets you. he wishes he had never looked you up, though he doesn't doubt seeing your pretty face like this would have wrecked his confidence regardless. you're kind, greet him with a shy smile as if he isn't about to slip balls deep inside of you.
pornstar!choso who, once he has you sitting on top of him on that bed—cameras pointed dutifully as you start to play your role and hike your skirt up so you can sink down on his cock—he can't handle the thought of fucking you like it's nothing, like it's not been the crux of his fantasies in the dark hours at night.
pornstar!choso who, probably to the detriment of his career, pushes you backwards onto the bed and connects his lips to yours in a kiss that surpasses every single fantasy he's had in his mind. you taste good, and he wants more. he speaks against your lips, asks whines a question that makes your stomach coil. 'can i eat you out first? please?'
pornstar!choso who is chided by the production team as he gets his head under your skirt and laps at your pussy in the most desperate act of need he thinks he's ever displayed. those that claim he falls in love with each shoot would be wholly correct in this case: he is in love with the taste of you, with the way your legs trap him in and ask for more. he could eat you for hours, run his tongue from your clit to dip it inside of you in reverence of the goddess he believes you to be. and you laugh at the absurdity of his hunger, at the courage it takes to run off script, and the pure need in which he eats you out.
pornstar!choso who only stops once the director threatens to cut the scene entirely. his cock hurts with how hard it is though, and he thinks the redirection of blood has made him lightheaded, because when he's made to sit back and let you sink down onto his length he swears he meets god.
pornstar!choso who can't help his whines as you ride him, an addiction already laying down roots in his brain. he has to try and think of anything less godly than you to hold on to his orgasm though, because the combination of your body and having subconsciously trained himself to associate you with climaxing is all too strong, and he's a hairs breadth away from cumming prematurely and ruining the scene.
pornstar!choso who realises as you continue, however, that your moans arent the same as he's heard them before, though the speakers of his phone. you're more breathy with him, your moans are less honeyed, more raw—as if coming from your chest rather than your throat. he wonders for a moment if he's not good enough, if you're having to fake your pleasure to save face for the cameras. but you're soaked, and even above the sounds of your shared pleasure he can still hear the squelch of his cock rutting in and out of you.
but before pornstar!choso can question himself further, your eyes are widening and you're latching a hand onto his throat as your pace increases. he can feel the way you tighten impossibly around him, the way your hips stutter and your pupils blow out with lust—you're cumming. and of course he remembers his instructions, to let you climb off of him and take his load over your face... but you're not climbing off of him.
pornstar!choso who understands the pointed look you manage to give him, that it's your turn to bypass the scene direction. you want to be greedy, to feel him finish inside of you, even through the confines of a condom. your moans arent fake, they're the first real ones you've let sound on a porn set—and choso is pulling them from your lungs like a choir's conductor.
pornstar!choso who can't last a minute longer, now with the way you lean in and coax him to climax with your voice, the soft praise that leaves your lips is an aphrodisiac and all too powerful. he sees stars when he cums, full blown galaxies too complex to imagine. call it an out-of-body experience or not, but choso is lost in his orgasm for long enough to warrant you bringing him back down with a soft kiss to his lips. he looks sinful: his hairs come loose, messy and stuck to his forehead. his eyes, though, are what's going to be the subject of a few screenshots taken by his fans: he looks totally infatuated.
pornstar!choso who, after taking a few minutes to settle himself after the shoot, watches as you walk over to him, a very pretty smile pulling at the corner of your lips before you lean down and peck his lips goodbye. he assumes it's the last he'll see of you, that there's no way he's worthy of every tasting you again. that night, he's scared to brush his teeth, to lose the way you linger on his tongue.
pornstar!choso who debates fucking his fist to the memory of you in bed that night. he thinks you've ruined masturbation for him, or sex in general: nothing could quite be the same. and as if its a sign from god that he's done enough good in his life to deserve some positive karma, his phone dings.
a photo of you, a pretty vibrator laid over your stomach. your laptop open in the background, his porn playing on the screen.
attached, a message that makes the poor boy cum in his pyjama bottoms. 'lets meet up again. i want to tie you up and film how stupid you get with a vibe strapped to your cock—a movie just for us, though. no audience.'
pt 2 in the works :p
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