#LOOK AT QIAO LING TOO

[spilledstars1234]

New Link Click Official Art for exceeding over 600 Million Views!

[doublxpresso]

joining the trend 📸

[raddestrose]

I saw this on Twitter and had the chance to do this



[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

I honestly think it’s too soon to know for certain whether Cheng Xiaoshi is truly doomed or not. I feel like we’re still missing a lot of important information here

[fortune-maiden]

Scolded

[juthemagicalclown]

shout-out to my queen qiao ling for that slap. iconic priceless heartfelt satisfying brave elegant strong beautiful graceful confident assertive dominating-

[psychopomp-namine]

this post is about qiao ling. but first, I want to talk about the power rangers of this show.

so. I'm really glad YE2 is putting the triple star warrior mirroring in a more interesting context

because that's clearly the intent and it's not like it doesn't make sense back in S1, but the actual execution of that mirroring seemed shallow at best with just S1 knowledge

(look! qiao ling even bought cake of them in the S2 finale)

I think it's because I couldn't quite place qiao ling's role in this until now. she's the star of wisdom, but she's the one who is the most out of the loop and lacking in knowledge... or so we thought. but with the S2 ending giving her tianxi's ability, and YE2 showing that it's a pattern for her to keep relevant information, then yeah, it's starting to make sense. the triple star warriors really are their character arcs.

star of justice, bringing hope (cheng xiaoshi's kindness being both a strength and a weakness that can either uplift or endanger other people; "even if you don't see hope, it doesn't mean it's not there")

star of courage, conquering fear (lu guang timelooping himself is the most extreme response to fear he has over cheng xiaoshi's death)

star of wisdom, serving knowledge (qiao ling and the burden of knowledge that she keeps from people out of guilt or protection)

and they really do need to overcome all of that to get the good ending.

anyway, I just think it's neat. I thought the triple star warriors mirroring was cute back in S1, but now I love it even more knowing qiao ling's place in all of this. I actually love this trait about her. she is always taking care of other people and has "big sister" vibes. she's the one who actually goes out of her way to find clients for shiguang to help and hearing their clients' troubles, even when she had no idea how their abilities worked. she's the one who truly connected with tianxi and knew how to communicate with her — even better than cheng xiaoshi could, and cheng xiaoshi was the one who actually got to live as tianxi.

it's in her nature to care for others, but it's also her biggest flaw. much like lu guang, in her desire to keep cheng xiaoshi safe in her own way, she hides relevant information from him. and the act of secret keeping causes her to keep doing it out of guilt too — as we've seen in the doudou case. it's a very human trait to have.

it puts the earthquake arc in a new context. a young cheng xiaoshi went to qiao ling, distraught over the possibility that maybe his parents died in the earthquake. young qiao ling, wanting to comfort cheng xiaoshi but also knowing that her parents were advised that it's safer for cheng xiaoshi to not go to bridon, tells him that his parents are probably somewhere "far away" and wasn't caught in the earthquake. this isn't just words for the sake of comfort. she has reason to believe this is actually true.

she's in a tough spot when S3 rolls around, because she should, by then, know about cheng xiaoshi's death, if not possibly everything that happened in bridon (through tianxi's power/memory transfer). unlike lu guang, who is dead set on timelooping himself as a way to fix things, qiao ling is in a precarious spot.

should she honor aunt shao's wish and keep cheng xiaoshi safe, which she also wants? or should she tell cheng xiaoshi information he rightfully should know, thereby allowing him to exercise full agency over his own future, even if that future has the risk of death? and whatever she chooses will affect lu guang too. what is the wise thing to do here?

on that note, others have pointed out how this recontextualizes S1E1 cheng xiaoshi talking about his parents. looking back, it's insane to me that S1E1's opening scene (not the dive rules, the one after the op plays) has cheng xiaoshi saying, "I won't go anywhere until my parents come back. if you drive me away, I'll hang myself here! then your father will never get a new tenant."

(it's looking like whatever he learns in bridon won't carry over to the cheng xiaoshi of S1, but I digress)

he says this, and both lu guang and qiao ling are sitting there calling him a childish idiot, all the while harboring knowledge about his parents that cheng xiaoshi doesn't have. (lu guang also has the extra knowledge of cheng xiaoshi's death and what happened in bridon at this point probably, but this post is not about lu guang)

like... in S1 this could just be seen as a little "haha okay so this is exposition and this is their dynamic" scene but now... man. qiao ling knew all this time, in this scene, where his parents might be. she knew during the earthquake. she knew while they were renovating the shop.

I understand the reasons behind it, and in her eyes it probably was the wise thing to do. but when S3 comes around, should she still keep hiding it, like she did with the doudou case? when she confronts lu guang about his memories, what will she do?

I have hope that she'll bridge the two boys together. we saw how her strength has always been communication and delivering words. she is the person the clients look to. she is the person that gained tianxi's trust and knew how to meet her where she's at. she is the person who knows cheng xiaoshi and lu guang best.

here's hoping that she can overcome her guilt and desire to protect cheng xiaoshi from himself, and become the star of wisdom the show wants her to be

[bithcisweartogod]

it’s not that cheng xiaoshi doesn’t trust lu guang. he does, probably more than anyone. him and qiao ling are the closest people he has. hell, he willingly trusts lu guang with his life on a daily, blindly allowing the guy to lead him in every dive, never once doubting that with lu guang in charge everything will be fine. 

yet sometimes he can’t help but wish he would tell him more. not that cheng xiaoshi feels like he’s hiding something. he just wants to know more about lu guang. cheng xiaoshi himself has never been a particularly secretive person. he likes to share bits and pieces of himself with others, but only those that hover on the surface, not allowing too deep of a look into his mind. sure, he also doesn’t tell people everything. why would he? but lu guang barely shares anything at all.

those little crumbles of him that cheng xiaoshi managed to gather over the years either came as a result of pure observation or accidents. sometimes, if cheng xiaoshi asked, lu guang would tell him about the books he reads, or show him movies he likes, share songs he listens to. but that’s about it. cheng xiaoshi’s grateful for what he can get, but is it so wrong to want to know more about your partner? 

and yeah, maybe lu guang’s lack of desire to share stuff about himself comes from the fact that cheng xiaoshi can and will tease him about it but come on. that’s what friends are for! something, he has to share something! like, childhood memories, for instance. it doesn’t even have to be something deep or anything, cheng xiaoshi doesn’t expect lu guang to get into the heavy stuff like he’s in a therapy session. something light and funny though, maybe a little silly, that should be fine, right? everyone has these kind of stories! yet whenever cheng xiaoshi and qiao ling dive into this topic lu guang just observes them quietly, all small smiles and stifled laughter. 

qiao ling brought an old photo album one day. she found it during a major cleaning up session at her parents’ house. despite being her family’s photo album, it had lots of pictures of cheng xiaoshi, so she knew she had to bring it to the photo studio.

and there they were, the three of them seated on the sofa, looking through the photos. the pictures were really wholesome. little qiao ling holding little cheng xiaoshi’s hand at an amusement park, both of them smiling widely. she cooed at the image, and then, in the same sweet voice as before, she said: “remember how you threw up after that one ride that we told you not to take?”, leaving cheng xiaoshi frozen and lu guang laughing up his sleeve.

so that’s how it went. whenever cheng xiaoshi appeared in a photo qiao ling would add some details about its backstory, making embarrassing ones even more so. like, here’s a picture of cheng xiaoshi with mustache drawn on his face in black marker. he’s showing off, posing like a character from a movie.

“a few seconds after that he showed us the marker he draw those with and mom told him it’s permanent” qiao ling deadpans.

“and i took it very well” boasts cheng xiaoshi, crossing his arms over his chest.

“you cried like a baby” 

“did not” 

“i think you did”, intervenes lu guang, who had already turned the page, discovering a follow-up photo, that, although smudgy, showed a wailing cheng xiaoshi. so no, he did not, in fact, take it well. cheng xiaoshi’s ears turned red.

“you took a picture? i was standing there crying and you just took a picture?” he exclaims.

“sorry, sorry” says qiao ling, laughing. “it was too funny”.

cheng xiaoshi, of course, saw that as a challenge. he flipped through the pages of the photo album and then stopped, smiling in that manner of his that meant he’s up to no good. 

“look who we have here” he said melodically.

qiao ling scoffed. 

“it can’t be that bad, let me see— oh god”.

the picture showed little qiao ling, up close, definitely an attempt of hers to take a selfie on her parents’ camera. but the angle wasn’t the worst part. the makeup. what was going on. bright splotches of blue eyeshadow covered her eyes, her eyebrows looked like she got inspired by cheng xiaoshi’s mustache and drew them with a sharpie, her lips were over-lined with pink lipstick, and, as a cherry on top, glitter. it was everywhere. but little qiao ling seemed proud of herself, while the current one looked like she was holding back tears. she’ll definitely ask who and why decided that it would be a good idea to put this picture in the album when she comes home. 

meanwhile, cheng xiaoshi was laughing uncontrollably, less from looking at the photo and more from seeing qiao ling’s reaction. lu guang was covering his mouth, trying to hide a smile. 

“don’t worry, qiao ling-jie, your skills definitely improved” he tried to placate her. 

“i sure hope they did!” screamed distressed qiao ling, looking as flabbergasted as she was before.

she turned the page to try and change the subject. suddenly, a blurred something caught cheng xiaoshi’s attention. 

“what’s that?” he asked, pointing at the photo. 

and now it was qiao ling’s turn to laugh. 

“idiot, that’s your butt!” 

cheng xiaoshi looked at her, bewildered, then back at the photo and then the recognition finally sank in. 

“what the hell is it doing in your family’s photo album?” he tried to snatch the album away but qiao ling grabbed it first, quickly passing it to lu guang. with the way his palm covered his mouth it was hard to tell whether he’s laughing or genuinely concerned. 

“why— who even decided to develop it?” cheng xiaoshi looked over lu guang’s shoulder, not trying to hide the photo anymore now that he’s already seen it. instead, he buried his face into the fabric of lu guang’s shirt, mortified. 

“actually, you did” answers qiao ling, smiling from ear to ear. 

“what?!” 

“yeah! you were the one who brought it to us! you thought that the scar you got was super cool, so you decided to take a picture of it, and then asked aunt shao to develop it. and she did”. 

memories were coming back to cheng xiaoshi, the way his mom laughed and immediately agreed to his request. she sure had an interesting sense of humor. he looked at the photo again, more intently this time. 

“but you gotta admit…it does look cool. like a lightning…”

“wanna put it in a frame?” lu guang suggested, earning a loud snicker from qiao ling and a death glare from cheng xiaoshi.

they bickered over the photos, competing in who can make the other more embarrassed, but despite all the noise they made over this album, it felt good to revisit those memories. to look back on their past and laugh. to share it with lu guang. 

later that day, when cheng xiaoshi and lu guang were already in their beds, slowly dozing off, cheng xiaoshi decided to ask something. 

“lu guang? you asleep?” 

after a short period of time a muffled answer comes out 

“no”

a beat. cheng xiaoshi hesitates. 

“it’s just…you never showed us any pictures from when you were a kid. or any pictures of your parents” or any pictures at all. for some reason he felt unsure. like he’s stepping into a territory not yet open for him. “i wouldn’t be too surprised to find out you were born an adult” a quiet laugh. an attempt to lighten up the atmosphere. 

“i can just see you saying ‘thank you for carrying me all those nine months, mother’ and bowing to the doctors” he blabbers, trying to continue the joke, which earns a low stifled laugh from lu guang. 

“you’re ridiculous” he says, and cheng xiaoshi can hear him smiling. warmth spreads in his chest. after remaining silent for some time, lu guang speaks again.

“it’s nothing special, really. my parents just never liked to take photos. i don’t have anything to show, that’s it” 

it made cheng xiaoshi sad, the fact that he’d never get to see lu guang little. was his hair always white? was his attitude always so quiet and stoic? did he ever do any of the embarrassing things he and qiao ling were up to when they were kids? 

“you’re disappointed?” lu guang asks suddenly. damn, he’s uncannily good at reading his mind.

“don’t be silly” comes out cheng xiaoshi’s immediate response. then, turning to the side, he ads, “i have you here now. that’s all that matters”.

and that’s true. whatever past lu guang had, whatever things he’s purposefully hiding away from him…he’s here, with cheng xiaoshi. and, as lu guang himself said, he’s not going anywhere.

next day qiao ling comes into the photo studio again. in her hands there’s…a book? she places it on the counter, smiling happily. a book turns out to be a photo album. a brand new one, all pages empty, waiting to be filled. 

“it just hit me suddenly, after i left yesterday. it’s so stupid. we don’t have a photo album of our own! at the photo studio! absurd”.

and just like that, they started piling up a history of their own, capturing time in the pages of the album. a picture of lu guang on the sofa, fallen asleep in the middle of reading a book. sunlight dances on his skin. he scrunches his nose in his sleep. a picture of qiao ling pulling cheng xiaoshi into a hug. he tries to look annoyed but his smile betrays him. cheng xiaoshi with a braid. it looks a little messed up since his hair’s not long enough, but pretty nonetheless. lu guang patting a stray cat near the photo studio. qiao ling and xu shanshan hitting cheng xiaoshi with pillows. qiao ling smiling brightly as cheng xiaoshi scrubs the floor behind her. he lost a bet and was supposed to clean up for a month. lu guang eventually agreed to help him (he always does) and ended up taking the majority of cheng xiaoshi’s cleaning duties upon himself. lu guang with a pissed off expression, huge coffee spot on his shirt. he accidentally spilled it and cheng xiaoshi had to capture the moment as evidence that lu guang does in fact fuck up sometimes. lu guang smiling. lu guang posing with an awkward peace sign. lots of lu guang, actually. because cheng xiaoshi, unlike lu guang’s parents, likes taking photos. especially photos of lu guang. 

it’s not that cheng xiaoshi doesn’t trust lu guang. he does, probably more than anyone. so he knows that lu guang would tell him more when he’s ready. there’s no rush. he likes it even more like that - getting to know him, gradually, bit by bit. 

[jenanigans1207]

The thing is, when Cheng Xiaoshi finds out about the timelines and Lu Guang going back— and with Qiao Ling now at least having an idea, I think it’s inevitable that he finds out— I think he’ll be mad, but not for the reasons we’re all expecting. He’s not going to be mad at Lu Guang for breaking his own rules, and he’s not going to be mad at Lu Guang keeping secrets because he has a right to know. Not initially, at least.

No, I think he’s going to be mad that Lu Guang put himself in this isolated, lonely situation and had to suffer on his own.

“I know, I should’ve told you.” Lu Guang will say, staring at Cheng Xiaoshi’s feet instead of his eyes.

“Yeah, you should’ve told me.” Cheng Xiaoshi will reply firmly, stepping up to grab Lu Guang by the shoulders. But it’s gentler than Lu Guang expected, and so are the words that follow. “You shouldn’t have had to deal with that alone.”

Lu Guang’s head snaps up then, searching Cheng Xiaoshi’s eyes for something. “What?”

Cheng Xiaoshi looks mad still, but now Lu Guang can identify the sadness underneath. “You went back to when we first met, right?” At Lu Guang’s hesitant nod, he continues. “I get not telling me right away then. You couldn’t. But all these years, Lu Guang? After everything?”

“I didn’t want to burden you.” Lu Guang answers. “And I didn’t know how telling you would affect the timeline. I needed— I needed to keep you safe.”

“And I need to be there for you!” Cheng Xiaoshi says, his fingers tightening on Lu Guang’s shoulders. “That’s my job! Wherever one of us goes, we both go.”

“Cheng Xiaoshi…”

“I hate to imagine how alone you’ve felt,” Cheng Xiaoshi confesses quietly. “How hard it must’ve been to deal with all of that without support.” Lu Guang swallows, but he doesn’t say anything. He can’t, his throat is too tight. “That’s the worst part, you know? To know that you’ve been suffering. Even during the good times, you were weighed down by this. And that— Lu Guang, that kills me.”

“I didn’t—“

“I know what it’s like to feel that alone.” Cheng Xiaoshi continues. “I felt like that for years. And then you showed up. You showed up and I was never alone again. You bore every burden with me, fought every fight at my side. You listened to every fear and worry I had. You cured my loneliness and all this time, I could’ve been doing that for you but you didn’t give me the chance.”

Lu Guang looks down. “You have been there.”

But Cheng Xiaoshi shakes his head. “Not the way I should’ve been. Not the way I want to be.”

“I’m sorry.” Lu Guang says again, more quietly this time.

“Just promise me,” Cheng Xiaoshi ducks his head to catch Lu Guang’s eye. “Promise me you’ll tell me everything this time. Okay?”

“Okay.” Lu Guang agrees.

And he does. He tells Cheng Xiaoshi everything, slowly but as it applies. And the ache of loneliness vanishes almost instantly.

[anne-bsd-bibliophile]

Spoilers for Thousand Autumns Volumes 3 and 4!!!

I didn't pay attention to it the first time I read Thousand Autumns, but during my reread it's obvious that Xie Ling and A-Yan knew that Yan Wushi loved Shen Qiao from the start.

Art by @_Konia_; reposted with permission.

It's fairly obvious that Xie Ling is infatuated with Shen Qiao immediately because his gaze never leaves Shen Qiao and Xie Ling trusts him completely:

Yan Wushi only looked at him, his eyes filled entirely with Shen Qiao’s reflection. “I’ll be taking your pulse.” Shen Qiao lifted his wrist, and Yan Wushi didn’t respond to that either, letting Shen Qiao handle him as he wished. But his eyes remained fixed on Shen Qiao—whether Shen Qiao was hunched over or sitting upright, Yan Wushi’s gaze never left him. ...Just as Shen Qiao was furrowing his brows and pondering, Yan Wushi suddenly smiled at him. This smile was different from those faint half smiles from the past, and lacked any sense of sarcasm, ridicule, or unbridled arrogance. It was simply a smile, nothing more, as if it weren’t Shen Qiao in front of him, but a beautiful flower. (vol. 3, pg. 85-6)

A-Yan tells Shen Qiao, "...I understand why my previous self treated you the way he did. He’s a paranoid person at heart, someone who’d never trust anyone else. No matter how good you are, he’d always want to bring out the darkness hidden within you. But he doesn’t know that you are you. There may be hundreds of thousands of Chen Gongs in this world, but there is only one Shen Qiao." (vol. 3, pg. 135)

Yan Wushi notices that, "There was still a hint of remaining warmth within his chest, left there by Xie Ling and A-Yan, from their feelings whenever they thought about Shen Qiao. But at this moment, Yan Wushi forcefully wiped it away..." He doesn't consider the the thoughts and feelings from the other parts of his personality to be his own." (vol. 3, pg. 142)

There's also the scene where Xie Ling tries to kiss Shen Qiao:

...Yan Wushi abruptly seized Shen Qiao’s neck, then he threw himself closer and bit down on his lips! In pain, Shen Qiao snaked his arm around Yan Wushi’s neck and struck hard. The other man fell limply on top of him. It was finally quiet. Shen Qiao let out a sigh of relief. He picked up Yan Wushi’s wrist and felt it, then let out a gasp of surprise. If the man had just been in the throes of qi deviation earlier, then now, only a short time later, his pulse had completely calmed. In contrast, his life force even seemed to be thriving? (vol. 3, pg. 225)

When Yan Wushi is back to his normal personality, he commented on the unskilled kiss: "What, did Xie Ling even forget how to kiss someone after losing most of my memories? He was so impatient he even bit you?" (vol. 3, pg. 232) Yan Wushi knows immediately that Xie Ling has feelings for Shen Qiao, but he doesn't realize his own feelings yet.

Later, Yan Wushi admits to himself that Xie Ling and A-Yan's thoughts where his own as well, and that's what leads to the confession scene:

Yan Wushi smiled but didn’t speak. Before, he’d loathed “Xie Ling’s” influence, thinking that those thoughts weren’t his own. He’d tried to suppress that strange feeling numerous times, and he’d believed that the moment he repaired the flaw in the demonic core, that feeling would vanish with it. He hadn’t expected that Shen Qiao’s smile would reawaken everything. He was unwilling to admit that he, who’d looked down upon everyone in the world, would one day find that a name had wormed its way into his heart. Human hearts were filled with malice. Some people were traitors, turning their backs on all integrity; some were ingrates, repaying kindness with enmity. There were also those who’d abandon their spouses, who were willing to do anything for wealth and glory. Yan Wushi had seen many, and he’d thought nothing of them because he, too, was a selfish, callous human. He only categorized things based on whether they deserved his notice, and to him, there were no actions that fell beyond a line that could not be crossed. However, now Yan Wushi was forced to admit that Shen Qiao was unique and that he couldn’t change him. Though the world was vast, there was still only one Shen Qiao. “My venerable self suddenly thought of something amusing,” he said. “Would you like to listen?” “No,” said Shen Qiao. Yan Wushi turned a deaf ear and started talking anyway. “Once upon a time, there was a man who found a stone in a heap of gold and jewels.” Shen Qiao’s mouth twitched. Didn’t he just say that he didn’t want to listen? “But he couldn’t believe that it was only an ordinary stone. He thought that since it’d been piled together with the mass of treasures in that room, it must also be a treasure. So, he brought it everywhere with him, and even had it examined and polished by many. But every single person, without exception, told him that it was only an ordinary stone, that there was nothing special about it. Guess what happened in the end?” Shen Qiao’s face was both lost and bewildered. “In the end, he finally believed that it was indeed a worthless stone. But in his eyes, compared to the room full of gold and silver treasure, even if it was only a stone, it was still one of a kind—a stone out of a million.” Shen Qiao was silent. Why did this story sound so bizarre? It was indeed unusual to hear such a normal story from such an abnormal person. He couldn’t help but say, “Even thousands of gold pieces cannot purchase happiness. Some people care little for wealth—they only wish to seek out things that other people find worthless. In my opinion, that man already liked that stone more than the other jewels and treasures, but he was trapped by his preconceptions and unwilling to admit it.” Yan Wushi laughed. “That’s true, you’re very correct. Thousands of gold pieces cannot purchase happiness." There seemed to be a deep significance within these words. (vol. 4, pg. 58-60)

[pastorfutureletthembe]

I actually started this blog for one post only. The theory is that the story we are following is currently the 5th timeline.

I would need to watch the donghua again to find hints in the show itself but for now this post is exclusively about the content we keep getting served as fanservice. Now, people nowadays see this word as negative but in this particular case, we are evidently caught in an ARG (Alternative Reality Game), which is AWESOME.

For those who aren't familiar with the concept, it is basically a treasure hunt outside of the original media. For example, if you gather enough clues during your playthroughs of OXENFREE, you'll find the coordinates of an actual place where a real object, a gift FOR FANS was hidden. In the context of Link Click, I believe the rules and answers regarding the worldbuilding are hidden in plainsight for us to discover!

I will make different posts on the clues in lyrics, but for now we're gonna have a talk about VISUALS only. And boy, do we have THINGS to talk about

First things first, let's start with

>>>>> Promotional posters.

I'm opening this analysis with this particular one because it is the most relevant to current events. Black circles are V and white ones are IV. The huge clock is the background isn't supposed to be oriented this way for starters. One V is where XII should be, which could mean our journey starts here. The other V is between Cheng Xiaoshi and Li Tianxi, on the light side, while both VI are on the dark side. Every other VI on this artwork is a broken piece taken out of a quadrant except for the one on the right near Qiao Ling which is still part of the biggest piece.

It is interesting that we don't see any clockhands here, only the quadrant, and the only whole number is 5, ONLY on CXS's introduction.

Not so subtil, the mirror or "painting" is labeled 'V'. Lu Guang is also looking directly at US, viewers.

Probably five lines of five x but we only see 3, of which only the first one got 5x. Four diformed shapes can be seen at LG's left, under V/VI, which could be the four previous failed timelines. You might notice that LINK CLICK is written 5times. The clock says 00:05. Oh, familiar, isnt it?

As you can see, the V is a light in the darkess at Lu Guang's feet. it is a broken piece, though. The fact it is the enlighted one could mean two things. 1) It marks the spot, where we're currently at. 2) Hope. I would argue that until then Cheng Xiaoshi always died and now, at the end of season 2, Lu Guang is in the dark because he never went that far.

VI is there too, in complete darkness, blocked from view by a ring. There is something to say about VII being completely obliterated but I honeslty don't know how meaningful that could be.

>>> It is my understanding that if a character change the past, it breaks the timeline. Past changed, present and future cannot be the same ever again. It doesn't create a new timeline like in MARVEL, there is actually no going back from a changing node, it unravels this world. Either it already happened, allegedly because of Lu Guang, or will happen in the next season, we can suppose that Timeline VI is the actual doomed one. The fact Cheng Xiaoshi is trapped is relevant too. Destroying Present and Future would trapped him in the Past, hence Come back from the dive back in time.

>>>>> Dive Back in Time

There are many things to say about this one, but I'll keep it simple since it's already a long post. Let's start with something a bit out of topic: colors. Why? It actually indicates that LG isn't from the same timeline than CXS and QL. And I swear it would be useful at the end of this post.

Blue and Red are on the same plan, no matter if we're talking about RGB or CMYK, but Green and Magenta are not. It's like CXS and QL are anchoring LG in this reality, but Magenta is not supposed to be part of the mix. Primary colors in photography are Red, Blue and Green; not Magenta. Since we're talking about photography and this is not the original timeline, I think it is intended.

I'll leave the count of squares to you (spoiler: either 5 or 3 (I'll explain this one in another post) :D).

>>>>> Overthink

I recommend you read this glorious meta about this ending. I'll just "correct" mimicha on one point:

The way the hands are "cutting a piece" of the clock; just like in the promotional poster for Train Trail. It indicates 5. I'll also add this one:

If you look carefully, you'll see two words: TIME PARADOX. As said above, a paradox should NOT be possible with the rules LC gave us so far, but it could be related to the possible 6th doomed timeline. The "dark side" could try and make it happen. Just food for thoughts.

If you want more meta on OPs/ENDs, I recommend you also watch this glorious analysis. That's all I have to say for this one regarding the number 5.

>>>>> VORTEX

Not much to say, except for this "blink and you'll miss it" screenshot. If I missed anything, feel free to share with the class!

THE TIDES has, sadly, nothing to offer on this current topic!

>>>>> 3rd Anniversary: Surprising Click

Oh boy, do I have THINGS to say. Don't be surprised when I'll make another post about this Link Click monument haha. Note: 5 PVs were prepared for this anniversary. Coincidence? (I think not).

N O W A N D F O R E V E R

The only 5 clue I found is what looks like a clock with one hand going backwards, from X to IV, it appears while the chorus is playing. That might be a bit farfetched but I'd mention it for archives purpose anyway.

B R E A K

I won't be a smartass by pointing out BREAK is a five letters word but- okay that's infuriating of them if it is on purpose.

Most of it is obvious, the same logic applies, except for the cogs and hourglasses, we see four of each falling. Since LG's shadow/light goes from IV to V, it's safe to assume that those symbolize the four failed/achieved timelines. The ones left behind. I'll probably post something about cogs and hourglasses one day.

A last one, for the road:

S U R P R I S I N G C L I C K

You should take a look at this fan's brain! They did a wonderful work. I already had this part prepared so I'm still gonna share the obvious. Five mics ("time is like music"), and five letters (with photographs inside I'm guessing). Magenta and Green are very flashy in this one.

Oh, here are LG's five magenta squares from Dive Back in Time ;D

Four failed timelines/tasks, and... loading the first out of three chances. (Again, I can't address everything in one post, this one will have a long meta on his own, don't worry :D)

T R A I N T R I A L

Two occurances worth mentionning. Once again, V is the only timeline enlighted.

B U R N I N G P A L A C E

Many things are happening in this one but only one regarding our current meta. If you pay attention, you'll see it several times, while the chorus is playing:

x x x x x

Now, if you remember correctly, green is the exact chromatic opposite, the complementary color of magenta. They aren't on the same plan (primary vs secondary)/from the same timeline. Usually, they color Lu Guang but here, there is no magenta and no Lu Guang. With this in mind, could it be the paradox OVERTHINK warned us about? We can only assume Vein is from the same original timeline as LG. Red and Green are primary colors so yeah, we'll see.

That's all for today folks!

I had this brainworm eating at my life for weeks so I'm very happy that it is finally out there.

| Part 2 |

[just-honey-dewd]

Lu Guang’s character intrigues me.

Not for the time traveller thing he’s got going on. But for the way he seems to generally carry himself. Outside of the overarching plot, or objective-focused interactions.

When he’s interacting with others purely for the act of interacting with them. He reads like a guy that’s trying to convince others, and himself most of all, that he’s human. He’s always thinking, always within this careful threshold of polite but calculated sincerity. He wants you to think he means well, but it’s not his first instinct to mean well— his first instinct is to ensure he’s not misunderstood by the recipient. And he seems aware of this, and prosecutes himself for it.

He can’t live in the moment and always prepares to account for any slip up. Sometimes he’ll find the words needed in a situation. Other times he seems to go dormant, or resides in a whole other world where no one can reach. Not because of inherited timeline trauma or ptsd— that wasn’t the causation. And not because he knew that silence was what the other person wanted. But because he couldn’t find the words within the established script provided to well socialised people. A script he’s had to manually curate for himself.

The guy seems to have always masked himself like it’s second nature, as though he’s never had the space to consider subjectivity within himself nor others. With what little can be surmised, his life before Cheng Xiaoshi seems isolated, devoid of passion or individuality. A blank and beautifully desolate canvas.

He doesn’t tell people things unless prompted or if it’s the socially appropriate thing to do. He doesn’t tell people things about himself unless prompted— and even when he does, he can’t fully separate the objective reasoning from any personally compelled inclination. What’s his favourite food? Food that aid in maintaining his chemical balance. What activities does he do? Activities like reading, sunbathing and basketball, which keeps both his mind and body maintained. Why does Cheng Xiaoshi sleep in the lower bunk bed? Because his constant movements would make the bed audibly creak, so it’s best that he slept on the lower bunk.

Lu Guang seems to be conditioned to constantly rationalising his actions and moralising his and others’ decisions. “It’s childish to do [x],” “this outfit looks weird,” “don’t impose yourself on others” are his typical branch of reactions to Cheng Xiaoshi’s actions. It communicates Cheng Xiaoshi’s emotionally-driven impulsivity but equally conveys Lu Guang’s aversion to subjective thinking and slight adherence to social propriety. Also conveys a cheeky, unspoken hypocrisy considering he also fails to adhere to social expectations— but this is where things get more intriguing.

After meeting Cheng Xiaoshi and Qiao Ling, you can observe how Lu Guang changes in relation to his proximity with them. Around Cheng Xiaoshi, he bears minute smiles that aren’t placating nor rehearsed. With Qiao Ling, he speaks with an understated vulnerability that comes from the heart— a subjective truth if nothing else. He doesn’t become socially trained per se, but his eccentricities are seen and accommodated to.

His comfort is wordlessly accounted for, his boundaries (while he doesn’t often communicate them) will be respected when realised, and he is regularly checked on by Cheng Xiaoshi and Qiao Ling should he seem too reticent or despondent for a long time. Even though Lu Guang still does mask himself instinctively, he carries himself more securely within his place in the studio and with his friends. He’s comfortable being childish, bratty, and emotional without reservation.

Around them, he’s not trying to convince anyone that he’s human. He’s dropped the proverbial script entirely, and lost the need to prove things. Because he’s been shown unconditional love, and even against the concept of fate, destiny, and any rational pretences— that love persists and keeps him going.

[mykingdomforapen]

It would be easier for Lu Guang to simply swallow it down and bear it. But it wouldn’t be right. 

In truth, nothing felt right. Heels of his hands pressed against his swollen, dry eyes, a crick in his neck, his heart trapped in his throat. One side of his head felt like it was being pulverized, the pain of the migraine stirring up trouble in his stomach. And Cheng Xiaoshi’s dulcet tones in his ear, his pleas no longer endearing. 

Lu Guang squeezed his eyes shut at Cheng Xiaoshi’s insistence. 

“Lu Guang, come on,” he said urgently. “We need to finish this.” 

This was a pile of photographs lined up across their coffee table, marked in chronological order, detailing the lifespan of a relationship between two cousins. The boys had grown up together like twins, Qiao Ling had told them when she outlined the case for them, but then grew apart after one of the cousins developed a gambling addiction. The last straw was when he stole money from his cousin’s mother to feed the insatiable beast, and the cousin cut ties. 

He suspects that his cousin also stole their grandmother’s jade, Qiao Ling told Lu Guang in preparation for the case. He wants us to help confirm if that’s true, and if so–if he sold it. 

Which would have been straightforward enough, if the gambling cousin was still alive. Unfortunately, he wasn’t. 

Hence, the ten plus photographs on the living room coffee table. 

Lu Guang shifted his hands from his eyes to his temples, giving them a sorry massage that only made him more miserable. He had been poring through photos for hours now, each of them a photo uploaded to the gamblin cousin’s cloud that the client had managed to pull, dating from five years ago–when the grandmother’s jewelry had gone missing–to five months ago, when the cousin had been found dead in his tiny apartment reeking of alcohol and debt. He scoured every interaction the cousin had with their elderly grandmother for any sign of theft, while Cheng Xiaoshi dived into any photo where he could root around the cousin’s apartment for proof. 

Even after five hours straight, they could neither confirm nor deny anything. The instant noodles that Qiao Ling had brought over to them had grown cold and untouched on the side. Lu Guang’s scalp scalded with the migraine, and Cheng Xiaoshi stank heavily of eucalyptus oil smeared under his nose to assuage the nausea that came from back-to-back diving. Lu Guang could smell its medicinal chill when Cheng Xiaoshi came too close to his ear. 

“Can you please back off?” Lu Guang said through gritted teeth.

Cheng Xiaoshi huffed as he threw himself backwards on the chair. Lu Guang avoided looking anywhere in his direction as he unscrewed a bottle of soy milk to ease his chapped throat. Cheng XIaoshi fared none better, but he had the self-perception of a goldfish to mask it. 

“We’re so close, though,” Cheng Xiaoshi said. “There were addresses to jewelry shops on his Baidu Maps search history. If we can find a photo that happened either right before or right after that one, I’m sure I can find more–” 

“Cheng Xiaoshi, we’ve been at this for almost six hours,” Lu Guang groaned. “Taking a break for at least thirty minutes won’t make a difference.” 

Cheng Xiaoshi huffed until his bangs flopped carelessly across his forehead. Lu Guang wiped his lips with the back of his hand, gagging slightly. 

“What if I forget?” said Cheng Xiaoshi.

Lu Guang exhaled deeply, teeth clenched and nostrils flaring so that it came more as the exasperated hiss of a steamer. 

“Then write it down, idiot,” he snapped. “Am I your mother?” 

Cheng Xiaoshi’s jaw clenched instinctively, just as Lu Guang’s did the same–for a moment, hesitating, ready to bite down on the words before they escaped his mouth. But they had punched their way through his teeth nonetheless, and at the end of the day, Lu Guang would have let them. Even if he knew that, while he never commented on it, it stung Cheng Xiaoshi. 

Because Lu Guang had said the same the first time they had this argument. 

-

The first time they had this argument, Lu Guang was still only twenty years old. He and Cheng Xiaoshi muddled through their abilities with curiosity and bravado. The only thing Lu Guang was afraid of was drowning, and it was abstract. 

The first time, Lu Guang grumbled at Cheng Xiaoshi. I’m tired, asshole, he said. Can’t you give me a break? Cheng Xiaoshi said something tone deaf–but you don’t even have to dive, you can just sit there and tell me what to do, it’s easy for you–and at that, Lu Guang stomped up to the bedroom, muttering it’s useless trying to argue with you to himself as he locked the door behind him. He burrowed himself angrily in the bedsheets and didn’t emerge until Cheng Xiaoshi cooked an entire apology dinner. 

I’m sorry, Cheng Xiaoshi said quietly when Lu Guang stuffed his mouths with softened carrots. Do you–do you want to talk about it? 

He said it with his back straight, even though his spine was shaking. Arguments rarely ended well in his experience–usually with a fist to the cheek, or a door slammed in his face while all the neighbors looked disapprovingly at him with full assurance that he was in the wrong. For Cheng Xiaoshi to be able to talk to Lu Guang took a bravery and a faith that he had to fight for, that he had to learn with blood, sweat, and tears to get through this life. 

Yeah, Lu Guang mumbled. I do, and they had finally laid their abilities on the table next to the pot of pork shoulder soup and small bowls of dipping sauce. This was new to the both of them, their magic of a great price, and they were learning their breaking points together. Lu Guang shared his needs to be met, Cheng Xiaoshi his fears of being of no help to others, opening their hearts to make space to grow, and at the end when Cheng Xiaoshi asked Are we okay now? Lu Guang said, Even better. 

So Lu Guang couldn’t grin and bear it, as much as he hated this frustration, this headache, the thought of tossing and turning on the top bunk with a heavy, hurting heart. He and Cheng Xiaoshi needed this moment where they grew so that the other could take up more space in their lives. Cheng Xiaoshi needed to learn that he would be loved even if he was upsetting. Lu Guang needed to learn to be honest. They were precious truths that would have carried them through the rest of their lives, if Cheng Xiaoshi had lived long enough for it. 

-

Except this was the second time Lu Guang was having this argument. Everything should be the same, but he wasn’t. 

He wasn’t because Cheng Xiaoshi was dead, and yet alive for now. Because Cheng Xiaoshi’s mission-driven stubbornness was what got him killed, and Lu Guang now could see the all bloodred flags leading up to September. Because Lu Guang could now name the anxiety that drove Cheng Xiaoshi into doing things now, before the wait of them consumed him alive, but Cheng Xiaoshi couldn’t yet and Lu Guang had to keep it to himself. Because he and Cheng Xiaoshi were plunging into the photos of a dead man over and over again, and every time Cheng Xiaoshi said something honest about it, Lu Guang had to swallow down how sick it made him feel. It’s so messed up, Lu Guang, Cheng Xiaoshi had said, that this guy has been dead for half a year, and I feel his heart beating in my chest. Lu Guang buried his face in his hands and tried not to cry, even when Cheng Xiaoshi was not here to see it. 

“Then write it down, idiot,” Lu Guang said, only realising belatedly he never said the last word the first time round. “Am I your mother?” 

Cheng Xiaoshi flinched. Lu Guang didn’t remember that. He thought Cheng Xiaoshi only gritted his teeth. There was a gleam in Cheng Xiaoshi’s eyes that could either be tears or nausea, but Lu Guang knew better than to point it out. Any time Lu Guang pointed out where Cheng Xiaoshi was falling apart at the seams, he would dismiss them like they meant nothing, like they weren’t the reason Lu Guang couldn’t sleep at night, terrified of morning. 

“The hell is wrong with you?” Cheng Xiaoshi muttered. 

“I’m tired, asshole!” Lu Guang snapped. He didn’t need a script for this. He felt sick to his stomach. He felt like nothing was ever going to be right, and he didn’t know how to make it better. He didn’t know what to do. “Can’t you give me a break?” 

“But you don’t even have to dive!” Cheng Xiaoshi protested. “You can just sit there and tell me what to do, it’s easy for you!” 

Was it easy? Was it easy to watch Cheng Xiaoshi throw himself into the past over and over again and shrug off Lu Guang’s concern as unnecessary, until he ended up on the wrong side of the bullet? To try again and again to look for what went wrong in the past, obsessing over each detail and torn butterfly wing until he scrounged for the right answer? To feel old and young at once, helpless and culpable simultaneously? To constantly lie, even though he was supposed to have grown to be honest? 

Go upstairs, his memory urged him. Lock the door behind you. Go. 

But something fiercer, louder than his memory took hold of him, balling itself into a fiery pit in his throat and scalding its way out of him. 

“It’s easy for me?” Lu Guang choked out. ��Is it? I’m the one who has to try and figure out how to fix everything! I have to fix everything, and you never think twice!” 

Lu Guang felt the tears bully their way to his lashes, no matter how much he tried to fight them back. He stared at Cheng Xiaoshi until his vision blurred with sickness and fury, the boy he was supposed to save and couldn’t help but fail. I don’t know what to do, his soul cried out. I’m the only one who can fix this and I don’t even know what to do. 

“Useless!” Lu Guang hurled. 

He didn’t know to whom he was shouting it, but he knew as soon as it landed that he aimed it at the wrong place. Cheng Xiaoshi froze, breath stuck midway up his throat, eyes wide as if he had been shot in the stomach, and Lu Guang knew that look too well. He went as still as stone, scarcely breathing as Lu Guang’s voice settled like the remains of an earthquake, leaving behind silent wreckage. 

Lu Guang caught up with his breath, dizzy with the catharsis, until its tingling numbness gave way to sudden realization. This was not how any of this was supposed to go.  

Cheng Xiaoshi blinked rapidly, looking away–the tightening of his jaw could not mask the way his lips shook. 

“Forget it, then,” Cheng Xiaoshi muttered. “Let’s just–yeah. Break. Sounds good.” 

He stood up from the seat and left the room quickly, shoving his hands into his jacket pocket. He hurried out the front door of the shop, the twinkling of the door bell the only thing keeping Lu Guang company as he was left behind in the sunroom.

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Number, Flower, and Tarot Symbolism: CXS and LG

The first thing I wanted to look into when I saw this frame from the 3, 2, 1 pv was the numbers they were under. There's something unusual about this clock: it's both upside down and reversed.

This leaves Cheng Xiaoshi under the numeral "I", which is one. The number one has some obvious symbolism that is fairly consistent between Chinese and Western number symbolism: new beginnings, courage, action, energy and goals. It's neither a lucky or unlucky number, as it represents the start of something, but as the one stands alone, it can also represent loneliness.

Lu Guang, meanwhile, sits under "XI" which is eleven. Eleven doesn't seem to have a particular meaning in Chinese number symbolism (at least as far as I am aware), but reducing the number to a single digit leaves you with the number two, which is pretty universally about partnership, cooperation, and connection. While one is about physical action, two is more internal. It's associated with the moon as opposed to the sun, the yin to one's yang. In Western numerology, the eleven is considered a special number because it repeats the one twice, and can be seen as something of a guide, being tied to intuition, visions, and destiny. Asides from number symbolism, the positioning also makes me think of the phrase "eleventh hour", which refers to taking action at the very last moment, right before it is too late. Very reminiscent of a "last chance", to me.

Importantly, this positions Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang at the beginning and end, respectively, which does align with Cheng Xiaoshi diving to the past and Lu Guang having knowledge of the future. It also connects with their flowers that make an appearance in this same pv:

Cheng Xiaoshi's daisies are similarly associated with new beginnings, as well as purity, innocence, friendship and hope. Lu Guang's forget-me-nots represent a request or a promise never to forget someone, as well as memory and faithfulness. Beginning and end.

The only reason I bring up tarot now is because the chibi shorts, Daily Life in Lighttime, actually does feature Qiao Ling having knowledge of tarot, with her getting both the boys to participate, and also because the meanings do align interestingly.

Note that one and eleven don't actually correspond to the cards they picked - I'll get to that in a minute.

The first major arcana is the Magician. The Magician is something of a trickster with tremendous potential, capable and ready to use their intense willpower and resourcefulness to bring what they wish to create into being. Cheng Xiaoshi certainly has several trickster-like qualities, with many of his plans relying quite a bit of deception and quick thinking. The Magician also is representative of a go-between; a connection between disparate worlds - above and below, heaven and earth, inner and outer, which is interesting in the context of his ability. However, do note that the clock is upside down - it's good to look at reversed meanings too. In this case, the card can indicate that in your quest to make your ambitions become reality, you are making reckless decisions that will lead to your own downfall. It can also mean that there are people around you who seek to manipulate or use you for their own gain.

The one doesn't just have to be a one though. In military time, 1 pm is a 13. The thirteenth arcana is Death.

Don't panic! Despite its title, the Death arcana is actually a largely positive card; difficult, but optimistic. It symbolizes transformation and change - it means that a phase in your life is ending, and a new one is set to begin (again, new beginnings). You must place the past behind you so that you can start to move forward into the future, a conclusion he does seem to come to at the end of season 1. There is always light to be found. When Death is reversed, it usually symbolizes something from your past that is a deeply rooted regret, causing one to end up in a kind of limbo. Depending on your perspective, this could relate to Cheng Xiaoshi waiting for most of his life for his parents to come back - focusing on the place he was left and finding it difficult to make connections.

The eleventh arcana is the Justice. Justice is all about consequence, cause-and-effect, accountability, responsibility, and fair, impartial judgement. Intuition and logic are balanced, and there is an awareness that the actions one takes in the past or present will have effects into the future. This is very in-line with Lu Guang's mentality - the rational observer with a strong awareness of the consequences of meddling with time. Again, though, this clock is upside down. Some of the reversed meanings of Justice have to do with lies and dishonesty, which Lu Guang is particularly prone to doing. It also can indicate a personal bias that can cause the scales to shift out of balance, losing that impartiality of judgement. It may also represent an unjust outcome that you cannot accept.

In Daily Life in Lighttime, Cheng Xiaoshi ends up with the Fool (reversed). Once again, we get symbolism of new beginnings, freedom, innocence and spontaneity. When reversed, however, it symbolizes recklessness, naivety, and gullibility. Both fortunately and unfortunately, this represents him well. The Fool takes his steps forward into adventure, unaware he is walking into danger. He must become aware of his surroundings or risk falling or getting hurt.

Interestingly, Lu Guang pretends he didn't see what his card was, but given the birthday art from 2022, with Cheng Xiaoshi's being reminiscent of the Fool, I think it likely that his card was the Hanged Man, likely also reversed.

The Hanged Man is a card of contemplation and knowledge. His position is a choice he has made himself - a sacrifice made both as repentance and as a calculated step backwards to reassess the best path forward, watching and waiting in the meantime. It's fitting for his approach towards attempting to avert Cheng Xiaoshi's death. When the Hanged Man is reversed, one may feel as though despite the time one has sacrificed, they are receiving nothing in return - nothing is resolved, moving, or changing. Despite best efforts, nothing is turning out as it should, leading the Hanged Man to stall for time and become indecisive.

As further evidence to the point that these were the cards Qiao Ling pulled for them, the Fool is the zero of the major arcana, while the Hanged Man is twelfth. This aligns with the 12 on the clock right in between them. 12 is symbolic of completeness, balance, and alignment, perhaps a representation of how they and their powers work best when combined.

[spilledstars1234]

LINK CLICKERS WE WON

NEW ALBUM THIS MONTH???? MORE SONGS????

I CANNOT WAIT TO HEAR ALL THE NEW OFFICIAL SONGS!!! IM SO EXCITED RN

anyways, heres some of my (slightly unhinged) thoughts abt this pv...enjoy!

I do NOT like where this is heading...LOOK AT THEIR SHADOWS IS THAT DEMON LU GUANG??? WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON LIKE WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?! IM GETTING VERY BAD FEELINGS ABT THIS-

BUT AHHHH QIAO LING SHES SO PRETTYYY I LOVE HER!!!

AND HER NAILS TOO!!! WE NEED TO TAKE A MOMENT TO APPRECIATE OUR QUEEN'S NAILS BECAUSE THEY'RE JUST SO GORGEOUS!!!

QIAO LING AND CXS' SIBLING BANTER IS EVERYTHING AHHHHH LOOK AT THEMMM !!! I LOVE THEM SM

I MISS THEM SOO SO MUCH AUWAHHH !!

LI TIANXI IN THE BACK AUGHH SHES SO ADORABLE (I can almost, almost forget abt what happened to her...sobs)

also the "game over" sign behind the twins is way, WAY too fitting... (sobs again)

...ANYWAYS, LET'S JUST NOT THINK ABT THAT RIGHT NOW! MOVING ON!

LOOK AT LI TIANCHEN SJHFK HES SO SILLY I CANT (i can almost forget abt all the stuff he's done in the show...)

LIU XIAO OML OML LIU XIAO DEAR GOD LIU XIAO ASJHDK!!! WOAH!!! HES SO FINE ??!?!?!?!?!? LIKE?!?!?!?!? HELLO????? HELLO MY GOOD SIR???!!?!?! (yes i AM in fact malfunctioning XD)

LOOK AT THEMMM I LOVE THIS TRIO SO MUCHHHH UGHHH THEYRE SO CUTEEEEE

ALSO THE RED HAIRED GUY GOT A FACE REVEAL??? OML HE IS SO FINE OHMYGOD

AND THE BLOND GUY FROM BEFORE IS BEHIND HIM, HES SO HANDSOME TOO GSJHKJFS

AND THEN LIU XIAO ON THE OTHER SIDE TO ADD ONTO IT-

UGH

ALL OF THEM

THEY ARE ALL SO FINE KJSFDGJ

AND THIS LOOKS ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS I CANNOT WAIT

ALSO THIS BEING DURING PRIDE MONTH???? THEY KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING OML THEY KNOW

[falling-star-cygnus]

so like- we know nothing about Lu Guang's parents, right? -> and he only ever loops back to the moment he meets Cheng Xiaoshi, never before. there's gotta be a reason for that, right???

Qiao Ling: We've never met Lu Guang's parents, but judging from Lu Guang, we think it's safe to assume that they're- Cheng Xiaoshi: and this is nothing against Lu Guang, we love Lu Guang Qiao Ling: -monstrously stupid sewer people.

getting this out before canon totally breaks it TTwTT -> based off my theory that Lu Guang inherited his powers

"Welcome i-"

Cheng Xiaoshi barely gets through the greeting before a floof of white hair is shoving it's way behind him.

He blinks.

Lu Guang had gone out maaaybe ten minutes ago to take a walk.. clear his head, for once, because he was getting finicky. Which was understandable, Cheng Xiaoshi wouldn't want to stay cooped up in the same place he had gotten stabbed either.

But now he was plastered against the dark haired boy's back like it was a barricade in war.

And shaking.

"Lu Guang...?"

"Don't-"

Pressed back to back like this, Cheng Xiaoshi could feel nearly every notch in his fair roommate's spine- every hitch in breath, every shudder. Lu Guang was scared.

He finds himself swallowing, and adjusting just enough that his frame nonchalantly blocks his friend from the windows.

"Is somebody chasing you?" Cheng Xiaoshi asks, keeping his voice low as he cleans a lens.

Lu Guang shakes his head, hands pressed against his mouth.

Their greeting cat meows out its welcome.

"..uh-! Hello, welcome in..." again, the dark haired boy finds his words cut short as he takes in who's entered.

A woman, with cold kitten grey eyes.

"Is there anything I can help you with?"

She sniffs, in an uppercrust- haughty sorta way, "Did you see a boy pass by here? Or did he come in?"

"I see.. a lot of people pass by all the time," the photographer hedges, keeping his tone friendly, "The- windows are pretty large."

"Did anybody come in?"

Well that was an entitled tone.

"Just you, lady."

Lu Guang flinches against his back.

"Ma'am," the woman corrects, her nose scrunched like she smelled something foul, "Honestly, how rude. Didn't your parents teach you manners?"

Ohh.

So she was a bit-

"They weren't around much." he says instead, before adding, "Ma'am."

Surprisingly, that makes her cold features soften. Just a tad, but the hard crease in her brows relaxes into something like pity.

"Oh, you poor thing." she simpers, coming closer to the counter, "Children should never be without their parents. You know- my boy had to live without his father."

Her boy?

Cheng Xiaoshi chances a glance over his shoulder, to where Lu Guang had frozen against his back. The dark haired boy didn't even think he was breathing anymore.

He pockets that little tidbit of paternal information for later.

"Oh, it was so sad. I miss my husband every day... but it couldn't be helped. It was his fault, you see."

...what?

"I'm... sorry?"

"Hm? Oh don't be, it was years ago."

"No- uh," Cheng Xiaoshi shakes his head, putting his lens down on the counter, "The- what do you mean his fault? If- if it's not too intrusive to ask, ma'am."

He was... around 90% sure she was talking about Lu Guang.

But that didn't make any sense.

"Awh, so polite all of a sudden!" he was really starting to not like her, "No, no I don't mind. Maybe it's better if I get it off my chest."

Or... you know... she could tell a clearly needed therapist. Not someone she trapped behind the counter.. just a suggestion.

"Well, then- you see... oh, it's so hard to even think about!"

"I completely understand, ma'am. You don't have to-"

"My son was the reason-"

Okay then.

"-my husband died."

Wait what?

Lu Guang slides down his back slightly with a near ragged inhale that has Cheng Xiaoshi abruptly coughing to cover.

"Sorry- spit take, you know?" he says, at her questioning look, "That's- wow. Uh... hm. Hey- you're new to the area, right?"

Please say yes, please say yes, please-

"What? Oh, yes."

He needed to get her out of here. As curious as he was, as he always was for even snippets of Lu Guang's past, he... this couldn't be the way he found out. Not from someone else.

Not from his mother.

There was no doubt in Cheng Xiaoshi's mind that that was who this woman was. The two didn't share many similarities, not much more more than their eyes and fair skin, but his friend wouldn't.... he's never reacted this way before.

Not even when bullies would heckle and crow at him in their younger years. His head never bowed, he was never- he was never scared like this.

"There's a milk tea place, right down the street from here? You seem so stressed, ma'am, and it's great for calming down!"

They better enjoy the publicity he was giving them.

"Maybe that's where your missing person went?"

The woman contemplates it for a second, a hard line to her lips.

It's the longest second of Cheng Xiaoshi's life. And he had to wait and dial for an ambulance as his best friend bled out!

"That's..." oh god, "a fantastic idea. Thank you, boy."

Oh, so she could call him 'boy' but he couldn't call her- whatever. Whatever.

Bigger fish to fry at the moment, or however the saying went.

Cheng Xiaoshi waits, his heart thudding against his ribs as he watches her strut out the doors. It's an agonizing thing, watching her take slow, preppy steps away from their shop.

tick, tick, tick.

"Is.. she gone?" Lu Guang asks, his voice so so quiet.

Cheng Xiaoshi leans over the counter to watch the woman- Lu's mother- turn the corner.

"Mhm-"

He barely gets through the noise before he has to catch his roommate around the middle.

"Hey-! Hey, hey, hey, it's okay... it's okay," Cheng Xiaoshi panics, starting to sink down to the floor with his roommate before thinking better of it.

It's been a hot second since they'd swept.

So- like a good friend, the dark haired photographer stands back up, with Lu Guang clutched in his arms like that one cat poster- the one with it hanging from a branch- and pulls him closer.

He can feel his friend's chest heave in short staccatos.

It's... more than a little difficult to maneuver the both of them to the couch like this, but he manages- with minimal jostling, too! Lu Guang's skin is no less soft when Cheng Xiaoshi swipes his thumb over his cheek.

He doesn't say anything when it comes back wet.

"I'll be right back, alright? I just need to change the sign. Two seconds!"

It's decidedly a little more than two seconds.

Why did the pace have to pick up now of all times!? They've been practically dead all day!

Cheng Xiaoshi tries to be polite as he ushers them out, but he's frazzled and Lu Guang is terrified and he can't deal with this right now-

...he ends up promising a lot of discounts. To like three people. Insistent people.

Whatever. Push comes to shove, Qiao Ling has their back.

When he gets back to the couch, Lu Guang has curled into the corner of it and buried his head into his knees- arms wrapped around his stomach. His chest pangs at the sight- at the trembles still running through his roommate.

"Guangguang?" Cheng Xiaoshi tries, gently reaching for his shaking knee, "Hey-"

When his fingers make contact, his best friend flinches.

So the photographer changes tactics. He takes a seat next to him, fingers drumming on his own thighs as he tries to act like he has a clue on how to act.

"Can.. I see your hand?" No harm in asking, right?

For a second, he thinks he'll be ignored.

"It's okay if-" -oh!

No harm in asking.

Cheng Xiaoshi guides the pale limb to his chest, interlocking their fingers palm to knuckle, and waits.

thump-thump. thump-thump. thump-thump.

The dark haired boy breathes out.

Lu Guang breathes.

Little by little, breath by breath, the fair haired boy relaxes from the tight ball he's curled himself into. His kitten grey eyes meet warm brown, hesitant as if expecting judgment.

And when there's none to be found, he looks back towards his knees.

"I'm-"

"If you apologize, I'm going to smack you."

Lu Guang quiets down.

Which- well... that's not good either.

Cheng Xiaoshi rubs his friend's knuckles as he lets the silence stretch, vaguely frustrated at his own lack of words.

"Do you... wanna talk about who that was?"

He knew who it was, obviously, but- he gave his friend a choice about his powers. He'll give him a choice here.

"...my mother." it's a whispered thing, hesitant almost like he doesn't want to reveal it at-

Oh.

Oh.

Cheng Xiaoshi was well aware his friends tip-toed around certain subjects with him- unless it was brought up directly from the boy himself. And for the most part he found himself grateful for it.

But he never even realized that it could-

That it would be... that Lu Guang would feel like he couldn't talk to him about it.

He never wanted Lu Guang to feel like he couldn't talk to him.

thump-thump-thump.

"She seemed..."

"Uppity?"

"I was actually looking for a nicer word but- hey, your mom."

That startles a surprised little laugh out of his roommate, so he proudly considers it a win.

"She.. wasn't always like that." Lu Guang admits, tucking his face back into his knees.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Cheng Xiaoshi asks in return, careful- ever so careful.

He still has to tighten his grip so that Lu Guang doesn't pull away.

"...I can't-"

"You can." because fuck that one-sided comfort his roommate tried to push, "You always can."

Lu Guang doesn't say anything, so Cheng Xiaoshi tugs him forward until they're lying flat- tucks his fair haired friend into his chest like he could protect him from all the horrors in the world, for once, even the ones that plagued his own mind.

"We can also just lie here, until you feel better."

A long, gentle kiss gets pressed to fluffy white locks.

"Whatever you want, Lu Guang."

And, just like before, Cheng Xiaoshi pretends not to notice when his shirt collar grows wet.

did you enjoy? 👀 -> if you did, please let your hopefully dear author know <3 they thrive off feedback and could be persuaded to make a part two