#LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT HOLY FUC-

[themisterhip]

(SPOILERS RECENT OPM CHAPTER)

Look-

LISTEN I.

I am NOT ok rn...

I'm going feral people is just-

HE. IS. MAKING. ME. FERAL. AAAAAAAAAAAA

[catsniffer420]

my least favourite genre of person is the type that complains about things going badly for them all the time, but they CLEARLY don’t accept help or advice when it’s offered, and always need to be right about Everything. like bro you dug yourself into this one. and almost all the other ones.

[tenok]

.

[hamilando]

ੈ✩ a monaco cruise (smau) ੈ✩

pairing : lando norris x fem reader

summary : the chaotic process of Lando getting a wife

fc: Olivia Culpo

a/n : This is a series, let me know if you want to be tagged in future parts ! it was requested anonymously, thank you for requesting it 🫶🏻

·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ

liked ynculpo, mclaren, oscarpiastri, carlossainz55 and 682,278 others

landonorris Monaco with my monegasque 🧡🌟🌅

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user1 isn’t he British ?

user2 his girlfriend is from Monaco

mclaren a win coming up 💪🏻

liked by landonorris

ynculpo my little british man 😮‍💨💫❤️

landonorris from which angle am I little!?

george.russell your height 🫷🏻

landonorris can you like not …interfere ?

user3 Lando with his wife and side chick 🐤

user4 BAHAHA- WE ALL KNOW WHO IS THE SIDE CHICK

user5 who ?

user6 Y/N 🌝

ynculpo excuse me

user4 BAHAHAHAH SHE REPLIED

user5 can you stop with your bahahaha’s?

user6 BAHAHAHAHAH no.

charlesleclerc a very special weekend indeed ✊🏻

landonorris I beating you ?

carlossainz55 I think we all know who is winning

maxverstappen1 me in the race, Lando in the heart

landonorris CAN YOU STOP ✋🏻

user7 I smell something ☕️

user8 max’s comment will not age well

user9 LORD PERCEVAL FOR THE WIN

user10 HAIL LORD HOLY CHARLES LECLERC

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1, lilihye and 452,284 others

ynculpo 4 more shots in Monaco 🧡🌅🍑

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maxverstappen1 bunda 🍑

ynculpo 🗿

georgerussell damn, the middle pic be too fine 😮‍💨

ynculpo 🗿

alex.albon marry me middle pic 💪🏻

ynculpo 🗿

lilihye marry me y/n

landonorris HEY, SHOO 🤺

ynculpo it’s a yes lily 🫶🏻

charlesleclerc NO, HIS PLAN

ynculpo what plan 🗿

landonorris his plan of marrying you

ynculpo lando, I know it that there are years before you put a ring on my finger 🌝

landonorris offence taken

ynculpo no offence given 🫷🏻

comments on this post have been restricted

liked by user1, user2, user3 and 87,272 others

f1news Grid drivers and their wags were seen boarding their yatches after the Grand Prix

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user1 might be just going to celebrate the win ?

user2 nah, max would never rather go to sleep

user3 with max loosing and smiling like that- hell no it is not a Grand Prix celebration

user4 calm down, it must be like some lunch get together or something

user5 it might lando’s and max’s wedding 🥹

user6 ofc, with Kelly officiating 🗿

user7 george and carmen have my heart 🥹

user8 charles looks like the rich business dad

user9 he is rich tho-

user10 and alex can bear him a kid so

user11 he already has a kid named bear 🐻

user12 and leo

user13 and oscar

user14 kelly, sweetheart match your foundation like you match your grooming skills

user15 wait till the Dutch man sees this

user16 you have a lawsuit coming up 🔝

user14 it was a joke for legal purposes ofc ☺️

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wagnews Lando Norris and his girlfriend, Y/N Culpo were apparently the last ones to board the cruise 🚢

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user0 they were definitely fuc-

user1 ahhhh body bang 💥

user2 AESPA MENTIONED 🦅🦅

user3 WTF IS A SUPERNOVA !?

user4 lando keeping up his fuckboy title ✊🏻

user5 there is something known as traffic 😭

user6 traffic doesn’t exists in lando’s dictionary 😮‍💨

user7 the amount of sussiness I am getting from this cruise

user8 I second that

user9 I third that

user10 IF ANY F1 DRIVER IS SEEING THIS, TELL US WHAT IS HAPPENING

user11 what if they all are boarding the cruise because of a zombie apocalypse-

user12 WTF, THAT MAKES SENSE

user13 stocking up my buldak ASAP

part 2 part 3

tg: @lydia-demarek @mel164 @h34rts4maisey @poppyflower-22 @dolphlinda

@ilivbullyingjeongin @fangirlforever2000 @magnusi-97 @clo5406 @yesmanbabe

[harunayuuka2060]

WHB Series #1 (cont.)

MC: *went to scout a place in Hades alone or so they thought*

Foras: *is following them from behind, but has himself concealed as per Leviathan's instructions*

MC: ...

MC: Well, as long as it's not the others.

Foras: *admirably* They're so focused on the task.

MC: ...

MC: *noticed something from the distance and approached it*

MC: *raised an eyebrow when they see it*

MC: *sits down to examine it more closely*

MC: What the fuc- Hey, Foras! Come here!

Foras: *reveals himself* Yes!

Foras: What have you found?

MC: Do you see this?

Foras: ...

Foras: I don't see anything.

MC: ...You've got to be kidding me. Whatever. Let's go back.

Foras: *nods*

Leviathan: An angel's portal?

MC: Yes. It looks like...

MC: A fancy bathroom tile.

Glasyalabolas: *laughs*

MC: What? That's what it looked like to me.

Leviathan: ...

Leviathan: How did you know it was a portal?

MC: It has THE holy aura or whatever it's called. And it almost has the same feeling when Satan threw me into one.

Leviathan: ...

Leviathan: I'll be dispatching devils to check the area.

MC: How will you do that when devils can't see it?

Leviathan: Are you suggesting I send you again?

MC: Why not? Foras and I can set a trap there.

Leviathan: ...

Leviathan: It's not that easy. You need to think about this carefully.

MC: Yeah, you're right. *yawns* Shit.

Barbatos: Are you feeling sleepy again?

MC: No.

Leviathan: Your eyes are closing.

MC: No. It's too early.

Barbatos: Don't force yourself to stay awake. *covers their eyes*

MC: ...

MC: Your hands stink. What the- *quickly removes his hands away from their face*

Glasyalabolas: Ah, that's because he's just finished rubbing himself.

MC: ...

MC: *wants to puke*

Foras: *worried tone* Descendant of Solomon?

MC: I'm fine.

Leviathan: ...

Solomon: I'm worried you started growing wings.

MC: Shut up.

Solomon: Hmm... It's still better to consume devil's energy.

MC: We have a substitute. I don't need it.

Solomon: You might've created the seeds of the damn and helped the demons in Gehenna.

Solomon: But demons in Hades are different. You need to be stronger.

MC: Okay, genius. What do you want me to do this time?

Solomon: Hm...

Solomon: Ah! Try Leviathan!

MC: Try? Try him with what?

Solomon: You paint nude, correct?

MC: Yeah...?

Solomon: *smiles*

MC: ...

MC: That is plain stupid.

Solomon: He enjoys brushes.

MC: I don't give a fuck if he does.

Solomon: You only need to tickle his senses and you're good.

MC: ...

MC: Can I hug you around the neck real tight?

Foras: Descendant of Solomon, are you alright?

MC: ...

MC: I wish I didn't have morals.

Foras: ...

Foras: Are you considering consuming devil's energy?

MC: Yeah. Solomon said I need it. *sigh*

MC: But can't I have it in a more convenient way?!

Foras: ...

Foras: There's a simple one.

MC: Really? What is it?

Foras: Through kissing.

MC: ...

MC: Yeah, you gotta kill me before I do that.

Foras: *pouts*

[mochinomnoms]

Scenario: Some small item from the prefect's home world ends up in NRC. For example, my brother found a local brand of soda when he was out of our country for a few years. It made his whole week.

Option 1: Octotrio finds this item and know the significance of it. How do they give it to their dear prefect?

Or if option 2, if you want jealous Octotrio: Another student else gives the item to the prefect, and they are seething over how happy someone else made the prefect.

(sorry this is self-indulgent and I think im funy)

“A bottle of Mexican coke gets launched out of a wormhole and thunks them in the head. What is it? They have no clue, it looks like a soda, but they don't recognize the brand, logo, or anything really. It says Hecho en Mexico” on the side, though...wait! Isn't that a place from your homeworld? You'll love this!

“Ain't that the soda Shrimpy is always raving about?” Floyd was rubbing the side of his head that the glass bottle smacked into. It hurt like hell, and Jade hiding his laughter at his misery.

“Stop laughin', Imma bite you.”

“Fuhu, sorry Floyd.” Jade managed to clear his throat and straighten. “You just collapsed on the ground like a rag doll, it surprised me.”

“Yeah, how about I take that bottle and smack you up the head with it? We can see who looks more like a rag doll then”

“Think you could?

“Know I could.”

“I bet you can't”

“I bet I can, you fuc—”

Azul cleared his throat, drawing both of their attentions as he held the bottle in his hands.

“If you two would like to save the Cain instinct for another day, I do believe that we can garner the Prefect's favor with this.”

Both perked up, sharing a knowing look before smirking.

“Good point,” Jade replied, walking over to Azul to admire the bottle. “They have been shyer since our last outing with them, this would be a good opportunity to—”

“Floyd swiped the bottle from their hands and started a brisk jog as he called out, I got hit with it, so I get to take all the credit and all of my Shrimpy's love!”

“FLOYD!” Both chased after him, a loud, familiar cackle ringing through Main Street and everyone's ears.

You were none the wiser, chilling in your room with peace and quiet for once, as Grim was out with Epel in the Spelldrive Club. You gave it 1 hour before Leona got tired of him and sent him back to you.

Your peace was interrupted upon hearing the banging on your front door. Groaning, you got up and made your way to the entryway.

“I swear to God! Ace! If you're crashing here again, I'm getting you a literal doghouse!” You yelled out, huffing, as you swung the door open and instead found Floyd trying to wrestle a bottle of something from his grasp.

It was quite amusing, as Azul's grip wasn't even budging while Floyd pulled with all his might. Only Jade, who was on Azul's right, noticed you and smiled.

“Hello Prefect, how are you?” Jade nodded his head with a polite smile. “We apologize for the sudden intrusion, but we have something for you—”

“No, I found it! I have something for them!” Floyd whined, keeling over as Azul finally gabbed a harsh elbow into his ribs.

“You got hit in the head, I hardly count that as 'finding' it.” Azul gave you a pleasant smile, though you were wary of what the trio wanted from you to bring you something.

“We, all three of us, have a gift for you. We recognized it as something you've spoken about, and out of the kindness of our hearts, we decided to offer it to you in exchange for your time!”

“You snorted, glancing at the bottle in Azul's hands. Yeah, sure, 'kindness'. What's the point of a gift if—HOLY SHIT, IS THAT MEXICAN COKE?”

Azul stumbled backwards as you reached for the bottle in his hands, excitement gleaming in your eyes as you did.

“WHERE'D YOU GET THIS? ACTUALLY, I DON'T CARE! LET ME HAVE IT!”

Azul let out a yelp as you managed to pull the bottle from his hands, your eyes glittering and smile wide.

“You three don't know how bad I've been craving this since I've been here.” Sighing, you pressed the bottle, nice and cool, to your cheek in bliss.

“I would suck a man's dick for this shit, you don't even know.”

You froze at the choking sound in front of you, and snickering from the left and right. You noticed the light purple blush on Azul's cheeks and the pink ones on the twins. Jade was looking away, covering his mouth, but you could still see his lips quirk up. Floyd's snickering was growing into a full giggle.

“Ahem, I, ah, appreciate your enthusiasm for the gift. I'll keep that…in mind.”

“If he doesn't, we will. Isn't that right, Floyd?” Jade chuckled.

Floyd replied, “Oh for surrrre~ Say, Shrimpy?” Floyd leaned in, smile growing as he purred, “you up for offering that thank you?”

You backed away, face growing hotter as you pursed your lips. The twins laughed at you.

“Stop joking around! It was a joke and you know it!”

You could still hear the giggles from behind the door as you slammed it shut. However, you paused, hearing Azul murmur something to the twins and them quiet down. They sounded a bit disappointed, to be honest.

Sighing, you cracked open the door again, peeking out to the three. Azul was looking at you expectantly.

“Yes?”

“…Thanks. Do you guys wanna, uh, go out again this weekend? You said you wanted my time, in exchange, right?”

Azul visibly perked, giving you a closed eye smile as he nodded.

“Yes! How about we meet at 11am this Saturday at the gates? We can visit the town, you don't get to visit often, correct?”

“Yeah,” You smiled shyly. “Sounds good, I'll see you all then.”

“You pretended to not hear Floyd's whoop!” as you closed the door, chuckling to yourself.

“Weirdos. Cute ones, though.”

[aakariiiii]

Hello!! Can you do reader taking care of sick kenma? And kenma is extremely clingy when he is sick? Please?

Thank you in advance 🩷

hihihi, again, sorry for the very late reply, I’m feeling a bit rusty as it’s been a while since I wrote anything but here! Hope u enjoy it <333

_____________________________________________

“Small break” Kuroo’s loud voiced boomed in you ears, startling you, causing you to drop your phone onto the hard ground.

“That—“ as you begin to curse, a raspy, tired voice interrupts you.

“Hey” Kenma’s voice startles you once more, causing you to drop your phone once again.

“Holy shit, what is wrong with me today?” You ask yourself as you pick up the phone once more, only to be met by a clearly fatigued man sitting beside you on the bench.

“Actually let me rephrase my question, what is wrong with you today?” You ask as your head turns to him, slight worry mixing with your words.

That boy looked like he came out of a war zone to say the least. Disheveled hair, a sweaty, flushed face and irregular breathes.

His head leans towards your left shoulder, unable to stay atop his head without extra support.

“Shit kenma you’re actually burning” you mutter, your hand slowly make its way to kenma’s burning forehead, just to make sure again.

“Am I?” He croaks, barely above a whisper.

“You look like you came out of hell itself,” you reply.

“Let’s go home”

“But the match with Karazuma is—“

“Fuc the match, best believe you’re not playing when your body feels like it’s made of literal flames, we’re going home”

“But—“

“Hey Kuroo!” You call, cutting off kenma.

“We’re leaving, kenma isn’t feeling well”

_____________________________________________

“Can you please not leave?” He mumbles a wet towel on his forehead as he lays on his bed, covered in layers of blankets

“I told you! It won’t be for long, I’ll just go and get you medicine to lower the fever down, and something to eat”

“don’t need that, I want you”

“kenma—“ as you begin to protest he cut you off.

“Please?” He mumbled and you cursed at yourself for not being able to resist him.

“I can’t defeat you can I?” You sighed as you dragged your body to kenma’s bed, attempting to get into it so that you can cuddle.

“Okay okay—“ his raspy voice began.

“I did tell you to stay with me, what I didn’t tell you is to cuddle me, do you wanna get sick?”

“Hey! You don’t get to have a say in this, either I cuddle or leave” you pout.

“But—“

“We’ve been together for ages, I’m sure you managed to notice how good of an immune system I have” you a smug smirk made its way to your lips as you slipped under the covers beside him.

“you’re lying to y’self, you have the worst immune system ever” he croaked, turning his head away from you to try and prevent you from catching whatever he had

“Let me prove you wrong then” you challenged, pressing a light kiss to his fever-warmed cheek as you nuzzled into him.

“Get away from me y/n” his raspy voice muttered, trying to distance his body away from yours.

“Fine, let me go and—“

“No, stay”

“Exactly what I thought”

Kenma let out a small, defeated sigh, but the weary smile on his face spoke otherwise. “Fine… But don’t blame me if you end up like this too.”

“I’ll take my chances,” you replied, your voice soft as you began to run your fingers through his hair.

Kenma hummed quietly, his breathing slowly evening out as he drifted into sleep, his body melting into yours.

_____________________________________________

One Week Later

“Ahhh-choo!” Your sneeze echoed through kenma’s house, causing his to move his eyes away from his gaming console to your tired body.

His fever broke a few days ago and he was already feeling miles better. But you couldn’t say the same to yourself.

“For some reason, I feel like I’m getting Deja vu” he smirked, approaching your figure.

“Oh, shut up,” you grumbled, wrapping yourself tighter in the blanket you’d cocooned yourself in on the couch.

“If my memory wasn’t betraying me, you said something along the lines of having a ‘strong immune system’? Was it that?” He plopped himself next to you.

“Kenma—give me about 5 minutes and you’re gonna find yourself in space” you groaned, sniffling.

“Okay, okay,” he muttered, grabbing the water bottle from the table and handing it to you. “Here. I’ll stop teasing.”

You took the bottle gratefully, sipping it before sinking back into the cushions. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“Wait, I remembered something else—you did say—“

“Kenma!”

[pascalsbby]

CARNAL

Carnal Masterlist / Masterlist

Summary: 1.7K / dbf!joel, mention of eventual dark!joel, f!reader (everything you could ever want, just trust me <3)

Warnings: 18+ mdni, SMUT, age gap (24/50s), female masturbation, joel masturbating, dominate & aggressive joel, cam girl, pet names (kitten, birdie, sweetheart, darlin’), praise kink, he talks you through it, talk of: ass play, fingering, oral (m & f receiving), unprotected p in v, sucking fingers, tit fucking, spit, edging, kinda stalker joel, pure filth.

Holy fuck this is filthy… just porn with a (surprising) plot.

“I never wanted a quiet, sensible sort of love. I wanted to be devoured.” - Beau Taplin

°:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° *₊.• ♡ °:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° *

“Oh kitten. You’re a fuckin’ slut, aren’t ya? I don’t think seein’ how I could ruin your three holes is enough swee’heart, I need more of you.” Both of his massive hands were squelching against his spit-covered cock, pumping up and falling heavily down onto his thick thighs, his knuckles tightening, squeezing out the spit and precum between his fingers as he gripped harder.

His breathing was turning almost whimper-like, your favorite. His deep Texas accent always presented itself when you got him worked up like this, right before he spurted thick white ropes across the computer screen, stomach hitching and cock visibly throbbing. “Oh fuck, oh fuc-k Birdie,” he would let out. Sometimes you were lucky enough to catch his asshole puckering as he emptied himself, if he was positioned just right in his office chair.

“What’s a big, bad man like you doing whimpering for me?” You cooed, smirking at the computer screen. He could see you, all of you, spread eagle for him, cunt glistening with thickening slick, turning whiter every time you brought your fingers in and out of your hole, every once in a while reaching deeper to wet your asshole. He always moaned when you did so. His moans were deep, guttural. What a dirty fucking perv.

But still, you wanted to see him, you imagined his mouth falling slightly open as he squeezed his eyes shut, fucking deeper into his hands, chest heaving.

You could tell by his build he was at least in his late 40’s, pushing away the thought that he was around the same age as your dad. Not married, obviously. No kids, or if so they were already out of the house.

Figures, as he was sat in front of his screen, ass-naked every Thursday night for the past three months. He found your profile on the cam website and has only touched himself to you and the filthy pictures you send him nearly every day, since. He says he likes the way your stomach looks soft, how when you turn around and spread for him your back rolls form ever so slightly, and how the two dimples on your lower back are, “callin’” his name.

“Fuck baby. Shut the fuck up ‘n open your mouth for me,” he demanded.

You did as he said, sticking out your tongue to show him that you wanted his spend to fall down your tongue and land right between your spread legs. You wanted to push it in your whimpering hole and keep it there.

“Oh what a good girl,” he praised, nearly purring.

He watched as the saliva dripped between your breasts, bulging out of the top of your nearly see-through black dress, and he tried to imagine what his cock would look like between them. How warm your throat would feel as he stuck his fingers down it until he collected enough spit to make fucking between your breasts easier. Not that he particularly cared whether you were in pain or not, but he imagined your tiny throat around his thick fingers would feel good. Slapping the head of his cock against your face, seeing it’s outline in your throat as you choked on it.

He cried out in pleasure as a small amount of cum dripped out of his weeping hole, using his other hand not wrapped around his cock to collect it. He wiped it down his shaft, using it to further edge himself. He sulked deeper into the chair he was sitting in, making sure not to lower his head in pleasure too much. He didn’t want you to see him.

You loved moaning for him, whimpering and drawing out his screen name as he talked you through your orgasms- talked himself through his own.

“Let me see ‘em sweetheart. Take off your dress for daddy ‘n let me cum one more time on your pretty tits, yeah?”

His mind wandered, what color would your nipples be, how would they feel swelling under his tongue? What would your pussy smell like? Licking lines between one tight hole and another, weeping and wet- eventually having your arousal run down his chin wetting his patchy and graying beard. Your cum drying on his lips, sticky against his neck. He moaned breathlessly.

“Mmm daddy, you see, I would love to, but our hour is up, and I’ve gotta go. What a shame,” you pouted at him. He had a truly worrying number of orgasms for a middle-aged man, another and he might fall right over. “Send me an extra 80 and I’ll find some time to sneak away to the bathroom tonight. I’ll see how far I can fuck my fingers into my pussy for you, hmm?”

You hit end before he could gather his breath, and a response. Your phone dinged with the money he owed you, plus a little more. Wiping your own spit and slick away from your mouth, you got up to shower. You needed the cold shower to take away the red in your cheeks and the red marks across your body. Self-sustained, of course, but for him. For his pleasure. For the money.

:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° *₊.• ♡ °:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° :. *₊

The gallery evenly hummed under hushed warm lights and a whispering crowd. Your artwork, you, were splattered so carefully across the walls, and your friends and family were looking upon you. You’d already made your away around to thank everyone for coming, for putting on a brave face just to later mimic the thoughts they’d been sharing with you since you picked up a paintbrush. “And how will this sustain you? What kind of job will this get you?” You didn’t have the heart to tell them that currently, a nearly 50 year old man was sustaining you for fucking yourself in front of a camera for him.

Where was Sarah? It was like her to be late, but not this late to something so important.

Your eyes roamed the smallish room, and there was another person you had missed. Sighing from the promise of more conversation and “what’s next” questions, you moved your hair behind your ear and started walking towards him.

Amidst the crowd, your eyes were drawn to the man, unfamiliar. You had only invited family and close friends. Sure, the show was open to the public, but who would have taken time out of their Thursday night to come see some art senior’s capstone show?

He emanated both beauty and fear- timidness on your part. There was an undeniable allure about him, your curiosity piqued. You observed the man closely, trying to place where you had encountered him before, who he could possibly be. His large back was turned to you, but you could see by the gray in his hair that he was too old to be one of your friends’ play things.

He turned away from the piece he was admiring, showcasing his side profile first, and something inside of you clicked. Not knowing if it clicked in place or out, the feeling quickly dissipated into fear. He was ethereal and your chest was heavy. Your palms sweating, you looked around to see if he had the same effect on anyone else, but no one was paying attention.

He was fully turned now, approaching you, but you couldn’t make eye contact. Your spine tinged with a sense of familiarity that sent warning signals to your senses. His eyes bore into you, and suddenly the half-naked self portraits on the walls felt like nothing compared to the depth in which his gaze cut into you. You felt like you needed to run. Your nipples hardened almost painful under your dress.

The air around him reached you before he did. Aged whiskey, honey, musk… a man. The flannel he was wearing draped over his broad shoulders perfectly, looking too thick for a May night. He looked completely out of place. He reached his hand forward and all you could do was stare at it.

What the fuck was wrong with you?

It was massive, his fingers thick and calloused from hard work and time. They looked familiar, even. Surely not… You recognized your pause and looked up at him, taking his hand as he introduced himself.

“Didn’t mean to scare ya, Birdie,” He smirked beneath the facial hair, lips turning upwards on the right side, showing his teeth. He looked down upon you, eyes darkening as skin touched skin. He saw in your eyes as you realized who he was.

“Joel Miller,” his deep southern accent dripping with charm and an underlying edge that made your heart race, “and you?”

No.

“Hey! Oh my god, I’m sorry, Chase called me so I had to step out for a minute,” Sarah entered the liminal space, nearly squealing. “THIS IS INCREDIBLE. I am so proud of you.” She had you immediately in a hug. “Oh, and I see you’ve met my dad.” She said cheerfully. “I thought I’d drag him out here to meet my bestie so it won’t be so awkward when you come and visit me. Cause you’ll be coming to visit me… right?”

You smiled, as warmly as possible as your body was fighting off a panic attack.

Recognition flickered in your mind, triggering fragmented memories of perfectly unsettling encounters. Joel was the one who had whispered, screamed, filthy words to you over the computer screen. His messages laced with cum and an intensity that had left you both captivated and unsettled- but always wanting more. You hadn't invited him to the gallery, and you had certainly never met him in person. The puzzle pieces fell into place, and a chilling revelation washed over you as he continued roaming your body, eye-fucking you, as you half listened to Sarah- he knew exactly who you were. He was here on purpose.

You introduced yourself to him, reaching your hand back out as his engulfed yours, warm and dry. “Sarah has told me so much about you,” he winked, “work has me busy so I don’t visit here too often but I couldn’t miss this,” he gestured.

He pulled your body into his for a hug. What a fucking gentleman, huh. Suddenly the ground wasn’t solid and your body was being held against his stoic frame… and suddenly your thighs were slipping together under your dress, wet and sticky.

“You cleaned up nice baby. Couldn’t look too fucked out for tonight, could ya?” He whispered into your ear, chuckling deeply into your hair as it moved against his warm breath, tickling your neck.

“Joel Miller, as I live and breathe.” His warmth was suddenly gone and the air felt thick, empty. “Now who would have thought our girls would end up being best friends? How come we didn’t put two and two together before?” Your dad patted Joel across the back

Oh, fuck.

Part 2: Prologue

:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° *₊.• ♡ °:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° :. *₊

A/N: Now imagine how it would be if they were physically together… oops! I’m always taking requests <3

[ur-dad-satan]

Horny Obey Me! Thoughts 2

16+

The way I need Diavolo to absolutely rail and destroy me is absolutely insane.

I would let Luci, Mam, Sat, Beel, Dia, Sim, and Mephisto fuc my throat at the drop of a hat. I swear I'll hit the floor faster than a drop of water on Jupiter.

Put me in a room with any of the brothers or the undatables (adults only) while they're wearing a suit?? I'd be sweating like a whore in church. You would not be able to keep me off of these men.

I don't think we talk about Levi enough. I mean yeah, I like to make fun if him for being a weeb and socially awkward (me) but we do not talk about how fucking powerful that man is. He's in charge of the fucking army of HELL!! THAT'S SO FUCKING HOT

I wanna take Beel, Luci, Dia, and Barbs and make them whimper and squirm so bad. I need them to be blushing messes. I need them pussy drunk, red hot faces, covered in sweat, can't make eye contact, completely fucking wrecked.

Diavolo or really any of them pointing out the fucking size difference between us like holy fuck. Yes, let my know how small I am. Make me feel smaller with your overwhelming size. Please lift me like I weigh nothing. Holy shit!!

I headcannon that Beel cannot be lowkey when he wants to fuck. He won't out right say "let's fuck" in front of everyone, but he would whisper into your ear something along the lines of like "I can't wait to get you all to myself and ravish you." or something like thatttt!! Once we finish and people ask what happened, he'll say something like "don't worry about it" and just smirk. Aaaaaaaaa this man is going to ruin me. (I wish)

The bros and the undatables all competing for your attention when you make a joke that's just a little bit too... Spicy and the way that they wouldn't stop until you look like you've been run (over) by a train no matter how long it takes??

The shyer brothers would probably have a panic attack if you just suddenly threw it back on them. Like they would need to take several steps back, a cold compress, and maybe even a paper bag to breath into.

Call me tracks because I'm waiting in this fictional TRAIN- I need to use them like toys I swear to fuck.

You canonically have pacts with all of the brothers. Imaging what kind of dommy (mommy/daddy) shit you can get up to with that power over them!!

I headcannon that MC does dirty lyric pranks on the brothers when they're bored and want attention. It almost never ends well, but MC is no longer craving attention. That bitch just wants a wheelchair afterwards.

I wanna make Lucifer specifically a moaning begging mess. Beg for me to stop edging you. Beg for me to put my-... Beg for me to stop teasing you and let you c-...

I can't tell whether Beel would be immaculate or horrible at oral. Like he would know exactly how to move his tongue to get every bit of everything, or if he would misunderstand the assignment and it would take a horrible left turn... He would know what he's doing...

I need Levi's tongue and Barb's tail to part me like the red Sea.

[kayschariot]

sex on the couch please 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

yes🙏🙏

-

“I can’t stop imagining you like that now..”

(smut..duh)

“Do you wanna watch a movie.” Alex asked you and you’d nod. you two would get set up and be sitting there with a blanket cuddling.

It would all be fine if the sex scene in the movie didn’t turn Alex on, he couldn’t stop thinking about you being in those positions and he looked at you. “oh my god..” He’d glance at you occasionally but the lingering thought of you naked made him crazy, crazy enough he got an erection but thank god the useless ass blanket was there right..RIGHT!?

no you noticed and looked straight at him, to be honest you didn’t know if it was the sex scene, you kind of hated him staring at other women like that but you get it.

“I can’t stop imagining you like that now..” He covered his face and groaned. You’d understand now and giggle. you’d continue watching but slip your hand under his sweat pant through his boxers and rub his bulge. “Holy fuc-Ah~” He’d lean his head back looking at you desperately.

he’d slip your hand out and grab both of your hands pinning you back to the couch and kissing you aggressively. You couldn’t help but whimper under him.

he put his knee between your legs putting a bit of pressure on your pussy making shivers run down your spine.

you had butterflies from this and felt all tingly inside. He broke the kiss slipping his shirt off and throwing it.

“Goddamn I hate when you do teasing shit,” He’d start taking of your clothes successfully and finally got to your bra and panties,

He’d unclasp it from the back with one hand and slip it off and smile when he sees your boobs. He’d tweak a nipple getting a reaction out of you cause you were moaning as he did so. He’d kiss down your neck massaging your nipple until he sucked on one.

You leaned your head back feeling some type of heat, or need that you needed satisfied, by him..only him.

he released his mouth with a almost silent ‘pop’ sound.

He’d look at the wet mark on your panties as he leaned up and smirked and slipped those off. he’d take his boxers off and get back on top of you positioning himself. He’d kiss the top of your head and stick his cock in slowly.

“A-Alex-..!” you’d feel pain almost immediately. “It’s Alright..it’ll feel good give it a second..” He said kissing you before getting fully inside you. “Damn you’re tight..” He said as he started to thrust slowly.

You started to whimper and moan and it made him so turned on. Alex started thrusting into you faster grabbing your hips and pulling them into him.

Your moans started getting louder..and you were grasping onto him trying to get a word out or say his name to try and slow him down but you couldn’t you just shut your eyes and leaned your head back.

“Look at me..” he’d grunt out grabbing your neck. You can’t tell if you were feeling fear or heat but you think it was both with how dominant he was being with you. “good girl.” He’d say once you to made eye contact and smirk seeing the reactions your pretty face made.

“You like it..Hmm?” He said as you got closer, You’d nod eagerly and he’d pull out. “Beg for it.” He’d say and reposition his hand to hold your face.

“A-Alex-..”

“No beg for it..” He’d say

“Please..i’m so close..” You’d say and he’d shake his head “more.” He’d demand and you’d be so pissed off clearly. “Alex..baby..please..please i wanna cum so bad pleaseee..” You’d say desperately, and start playing with your clit.

He’d smirk, “Damn..” He said not really letting it sink in that you’d practically let the boy do anything to you by now. He slid his cock in again, thrusting a couple more times and letting you finish, and when you did it was music to his fucking ears. He’d pull out, “Where do you want it?” He’d ask.

you shrugged so he came on your stomach. “You did so good, i love you” He’d kiss your head and get you two cleaned up. You guys would finish the movie cuddling on the couch and he told you how much he loved you.

[itsangelll]

our secret ☆

a/n: this has been circling in my head for ages cause I was like why not but I hope you guys enjoy there may be some spelling mistakes

2015 era!!

warnings: fingering slight degrading?

Y/n’s pov:

this was so wrong, I haven’t seen Tom after his wedding and I thought he was off limits I mean he was married? I’m not a whore or anything but fuck me I’ve been friends with him for years I’ve always felt attracted to him but I couldn’t do anything since he was married. Until one day he called me and told me his wife was away for a few days, he wanted to spend time with me which was odd because he hasn’t asked that at all ever. So I knew something was odd.

I was about to knock on the door until I got thrown in the lounge room and pinned against a wall. “What the fuc-“ I was shutten up by a rough kiss his lips moved against mine which was like heaven his lips were so soft but rough at the same time. His hands immediately found my waist, I arched my back up my hands tangled in his hair. He pulled back and looked directly at me staring into my soul I looked back at him with a confused expression on my face. “Just shut up” he murmured “what the fuck why did you just kiss me?”

He didn’t answer me he just dragged me upstairs “Tom can you tell me what’s going on” I was about to stumble cause of how much of a grip this guy had on my arm. “I told you to shut up schatz” we finally made it upstairs finally, he threw me on the bed and towered over me which made me feel overwhelmed and my cheeks flush his hands were tugging at my shirt he got it off eventually. Which left me in my black lacey bra which he loved “so fucking gorgeous” he murmured, he planted wet kisses which turned into sucking and biting across my neck causing me to moan and lift my head up giving him more access.

His hands were moving up and down my thighs he knew what he was doing cause my face was getting more annoyed, “Tom stop being a tease” he removed his lips from my neck and looked down at me with so much lust in his eyes I could have a heart attack, he moved his lips down to my ear and whispered “are you really that needy for me?” I nod. He snickered without warning my jeans were ripped off me which left me in nothing but my underwear, I was already soaked his hands got closer and closer he pressed his index finger against my clothed clit and my breath hitched up “fuck you’re so wet and I haven’t even done anything yet”. He moved my panties to the side and pushed his finger inside me I pursed my lips together and I shut my eyes tightly his finger stretched me out so much but fuck it felt amazing.

He moved his finger in and out of me slowly taking his time cause he could see how much i was enjoyed this he leaned down and his lips met mine I moaned into the kiss his finger moved in and out of me faster making me feel like I was in heaven all the blood was rushing to my head. His thumb pressed harshly down on my clit causing me to moan even louder which he loved, “You’re such a whore y/n letting me finger fuck you like this” he whispered in a raspy voice, I couldn’t even reply cause fuck I was enjoying this too much. His thumb rubbed hard against my clit and his finger was knuckle deep he moved his finger in different angles causing the most dirtiest things to come out of my mouth. My thighs begin to shake and he knew I was close his pace became rapid his thumb rubbing faster on my clit “Tom holy fuck!”, after a minute, I cummed all over his fingers.

I let out a shaky breath and I sink back into the pillow “You did so good schatz” he kissed my shoulder he grabbed a tissue to wipe of the mess off his fingers I smiled at him “so you wanna tell me why you invited me over here?” I asked he sighed “well isn’t it obvious I like you y/n but for now let’s get you cleaned up and why don’t we keep this our secret?”

A/n: OH MY GODDDDD MY FIRST SMUT IM PROUD OF MYSELF. I loved writing this please feel free to send me anything I hope you all enjoyed and I’m sorry if it sucked I DID TRY

mwah bye cuties <3

[fettuccin-e]

PLEASE SMUT PROMPTS 1 AND 79 FOR POE DAMERON

nonnie when i went to look at the prompts you chose i literally gasped that is filthyyyy i LOVE it okay DOM POE DOM POE DOM POE holy shit i had so much fun writing this!!! thank you for requesting!!!

Tags: Poe Dameron x Reader, afab!fem!reader, dom/sub dynamics, dom!Poe, fem!petnames, unprotected piv (don't be silly, wrap your willy), some light slapping (w/c: 810)

Prompt #1: “Do I look like I’m messing around? Do I look like I won’t punish you?” and Prompt #79: “I can be good, so good! I swear!”

Find the prompts for the 3K Celebration here!

He’s too fucking good at this. Too good at making you feel so fucking good, at making your head spin as he plays with your body like a toy. Poe is a confident man, sometimes too confident, and fuck, that comes through just fine in the privacy of your bedroom.

And Maker, there are rules. Rules that you’re supposed to follow when he’s got you at his mercy like this; no touching yourself, no touching him without permission. No cumming without permission. But stars, he’s fucking you like he’ll never get the chance to do it again, and he’s hitting that spot inside you just right, the spot that makes lightning shoot up your spine, the spot that only he’s able to find, over and over and over again.

“Poe, it’s too much- I can’t, oh stars, please let me cum, I-” you moan, but Poe only smiles, all teeth and absolutely feral, at your begging.

“Not yet, baby, gotta wait for me, right?” He shoves his hips forward just a little bit harder, but it’s enough to make you choke on a gasp as he presses in so hard and so deep that it brings tears to your eyes.

He slaps your thigh in warning. “Wait for me,” he growls.

But he doesn’t know, he doesn’t understand. He doesn’t understand that you’re already there, pleasure ricocheting up your body, your stomach tightening. And stars, he just keeps fucking you at that same devastating angle, getting you higher and higher and oh-

“Poe,” you gasp, choking on air, and fuck, it’s already too late. 

You keen, tossing your head back into the pillows as you clench and gush around Poe’s cock, and he moans, fucking into you on pure instinct, prolonging your orgasm for just a few seconds longer. Maker, it’s so good, it feels so good, so perfect, that it feels like you haven’t broken any kind of rule at all.

Except you have, you’ve violated the rule without abandon, recklessly cumming around Poe’s cock. His hips come to a sudden stop, and it’s suddenly like you both have come back to yourselves.

You hesitantly meet his eyes and see him looking incredulously at you for a moment, like he can't believe what you've just done, before they inexplicably darken. You break his gaze immediately, heart beating so hard you swear it could break from your chest.

His hand grips your jaw without warning, forcing you to meet his eyes once again, and Maker, you’re done for. He smirks in a way that is just pure evil, as he growls, “I told you not to cum, baby.”

He pulls out of you without any kind of finesse, and lands a swift slap against your sensitive pussy, leaving you empty and stinging, all in a second. “Do I look like I’m messing around?” he snarls, “Do I look like I won’t punish you?”

“N-No, Poe,” you whine, and he lands another slap against your clit.

“Then why did you cum, sweetheart? What did I fucking tell you?” he shoves three swift fingers into you, and you can’t decide whether to be relieved that you’re being filled again, or mourn the fact that he didn’t give you his cock.

“Felt- oh Maker,” you gasp as he crooks those horrible fingers inside you. “Felt too good, Poe.”

“Yeah, honey?” He grins, like he can’t help being smug, and lands three slaps against your achy clit in quick succession. You have to clap a hand over your mouth to keep from screaming. “So greedy. What happened to the rules, baby? What happened to my good girl?”

You blink, squeezing overwhelmed tears out of your eyes as you wail, “I can be good! So good, I swear- fuck, I swear,” you whine, and he fucks his fingers furiously into your slick pussy.

“Can you baby?” he murmurs, leaning forward to speak against your lips in some semblance of a kiss. “If I give you my cock again, can you be the good, sweet, perfect girl I know you can be?”

You nod furiously, and he smiles, finally kissing you, long and deep, while he pulls his fingers out of you, and replaces them with his thick cock. Maker, he spreads you apart so fucking perfect, so deep, it’s like coming alive. “Fuck, baby,” he whispers against your lips, and you swear you can feel the way he throbs inside you.

As he finally bottoms out again against you, he smiles against your mouth again, murmuring, “I forgive you, my good girl.”

He pulls his hips back before fucking back into you, so rough the slap of your bodies meeting echoes in your ears. You try to breathe through how deep he is, deep enough that it forces the air out of your lungs.

He lands a swift smack against your clit, a reminder as he says, “Just don’t let it happen again.”

[zombholic]

| 𝐃𝐑. 𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐏𝐓. 𝟐 |

“dude i swear i will get on my knees for that woman!” you rolled over on your best friends, dina’s bed as she passed you a blunt, taking a hit before passing it back to the dark haired girl sitting against her bed on the floor.

“you saw her two times y/nn” she shook her head looking at the blunt before looking at you. “ok but listen, she is like ethereal dude, i’d gobble her-“ “and you’re done speaking, go to sleep you have work tomorrow” you almost puked at the thought of work.

dina rolled you over to the wall side as she got under the covers “i should have a heart attack and then you can take me and ask for her” “go to bed y/n!”

hearing your stupid alarm go off, dina took it upon herself to grab your ankles and drag you off her very comfortable bed “i’m going to put you in my 13th record” you rubbed your face before getting up to her bathroom “love you!”

—

you were only a little happy today because it was pay day so you decided to be nice to the annoying customers as well. “have a great day ma’am” you gave the most fake smile to the customer, flipping her off when she left “no sign of doctor goddess this morning?” jesse walks in to start his closing shift.

“she’s the only reason i’m even here right now, can’t believe this is how she breaks up with me” you fake a sad sign, shaking your head at him causing him to chuckle at your attitude.

quickly going around the counter to help jesse clean up for his shift you started by wiping down the tables, the bell to the door chimes, leaving the rag and spray bottle on the dirty table, you saw abby. “hey doctor” you walked back to the register, throwing the latex gloves in the trash, giving her a smile. “hey sweetheart” the nickname giving you a tingly feeling in your stomach.

“the usual? and why so late?” you started with brewing the coffee “night shift and can you make that 4 please, my co-workers need it too” she sighed giving you the sweetest smile.

i want you to fuc-

nodding at her request you grabbed a couple more cups and a cup holder “so as a doctor do you get like any days off? it seems so like exhausting” you tilted your head looking at her “well, because i am a very needed doctor in the field i get at least a month or two off for vacation but on my days off i need to have my pager on me always” she shows you the little black box on her pocket.

you feel jesse “accidentally” bump into you with a sorry ass apologize and a cough, giving to the look. “so um, i was wondering if i could like maybe get your number?” you held your breath, fiddling with your fingers only giving her minimal eye contact. abby pulls her phone out, handing it over to you “why not” she maintains her eye contact.

quickly adding your contact in her phone you gave it back to her, giving yourself a fist bump in your head “you know like incase i have a heart attack or something and need to call for help” you joked biting the inside of your cheek out of a nervous habit “i hope you never have a heart attack sweet thing and i really hope you call the ambulance first” she laughed.

giving her the coffees you gave her a small bye “i’ll text you on my break, if you’re awake by then?” she gave you a flashing smile before walking out.

“holy shit! you got her number” jesse patted your back “holy fucking shit! i like almost shit myself, im gonna pass out” you inhaled deeply after holding your breath for so long “can i be the maid of honor” he wiggled his brows at you with a stupid smirk on his face “you can sit in the back with the grass.”

—

getting out the shower you started getting ready for bed, not to sleep cause tomorrow is your day off but you wanted to just chill and watch the vampire diaries.

buzz buzz

grabbing your phone you see a number text, your heart racing knowing it’s literally the love of your life texting.

—

Hello, it’s Abby from the coffee shop.

omg hey! didnt think u would text me

Of course I would, why wouldn’t I?

i mean, you are a busy heart doctor so i assumed you would be too busy 😭

Why are you crying?

crying? no abs it’s supposed to be me laughing LOL

Oh, well I still have a lot to learn.

you’re literally adorable, are you off tomorrow?

During the day, yes, but I have another night shift. Why?

do you maybe want to go out for lunch or something?

Of course, I would love to.

What time and which restaurant?

you can pick that for us, im down for anything :)

How about 12pm at Vue Rooftop?

oh that sounds fancy and i probably can’t afford it 🥲

Sweetheart, who said you were going to pay for anything in the first place? It’s my treat.

no, i cant let you pay for me thats not fair on you

It’s a date Y/n, I’ll see you tomorrow. I have to get back to work now, Goodnight beautiful.

AUTHORS NOTE: yeah i have adhd and i am making part 3 already … EHEHEHEH

[tang3r1n]

here’s my list of anime dudes and chicks who’d fuck with eating ass and why;

(tw, i allude to dark subjects at some points, please be cautious and keep yourself and your mind safe <3)

animes; one piece, jjk, mha, aot

sanji— he’d be weird abt it, too loud, too wet, too gross abt it, idk man he’d be NEEEAAASSSTY.

zoro— not weird but he’d be like…so in love with your ass. like you gotta beg him to touch your clit cause he’s so focused on ur booty

law— hrrngh. hnnngfh- mmmmph.. love him. anyways, another one obsessed with ass but he’d be that sleaze who licks from your clit to asshole. like he edges you by just licking long stripes from one hole to the other reeeaalll slow. fingerbangs you like a MOTHER FUCKER while eating ur ass tho, like the kinda fast that looks like it hurts but feels fucking fantastic

luffy— obviously. no duh. no shit. he’s feral with it, but like law he switches between pussy and ass.. okay wait nvm he leans towards ur ass more imo, more stuff to actually ingest ig

doffy— he doesn’t wanna admit that he’s so fucking into ass, like the sight of a lil booty hole and he’s rock fucking hard, so he makes it a humiliation thing. like he’s making you feel pathetic and horrible for cumming from your ass like his dick isn’t sore as fuck and he’s cumming dry.

i really wanna say shanks. i really wanna fucking say shanks…. i’m saying shanks. he’d be lazy abt it tho, mainly eats you out to get your ready for his dick ngl, more of an ass fucker than an ass eater.

KIDD. KIDD. ON GOD. he’d be like doffy except he’s open abt LOVING ass AND humiliating you. he’s so fucking mean and on his knees slurping and sucking and fucking. deco loves biting your ass so hard you bleed. he’d fuck dry. yes he would.

hrrngk- nami<3– yall i have a PHAT crush on nami.. obsessed with her being obsessed over her bestie. anyways. FUCK. GOD. she’ll never fucking tell you abt it, never ever, but you can always feel her thumbs twitching near your lil pucker when she goes down on you, BIIIGGG into spanking tho. bitch leaves marks through jeans.

gojo— it’s gojo satoru, of course he’s into ass. he is THE man. THE MAN. he’s gonna eat ass, he’s gonna eat pussy, he’s gonna cum in ur mouth and make out, he’s gonna cum in your holes and eat it out. nasty mf with nasty desires.

g-..hm..yeah geto— he’d also be a humiliator. he doesn’t REALLY like ass all that much, doesn’t mind it, BUT.. it upsets you, makes you all teary and squirmy and he DOES like that. spanks so hard you welt <3

sukuna— fuck off you know why. i-i don’t have to say anything, ITS SUKUNA

mommy— I MEAN SHOKO— big bad mommy dom who makes you eat her ass then shoved all kinds of shit in your holes <3 loves doctor play and ‘taking your temp’ the old fashioned way <3 (god spit on me…)

aizawa— UUUUGGGHHHH :( i feel like he’s one of those men who loves fucking ass more than pussy, yknow? he’ll shove a vibe up there, turn it on full blast, and make you sit on his face while he eats you out and fingers ur pussy <3 a true gentleman who cums hands free when you squirt on his face and squeal then draws you a bath <33

fat gum— too easy. too fucking easy, gang he’s another everything man, loves it all.

ende-hm. en. hm. lemme sit on it for a second.

HOLY SHIT DABI— oh such an ass fucker, such an ass eater. he likes it for the taboo, naughty, gross aspect of it. the more you hate it the more he adores it. OH LORD he’d burn lil hearts on your ass so you couldn’t sit, make you lay face down and naked so he can eat your ass out while you’re ‘healing’ (he’s gonna do it again when they’ve scarred over.)

MIDNIGHT.— shes an either-or. she’ll let you choose which she eats out but both holes WILL be stuffed.

miruko— ofc dude. like. ofc. she’s got this carrot dildo you see, BABE JUST HEAR HER OUT PLEASE JUST LISTE—

eren mf yeager, BOTH yeager brothers— zeke is just an ass man, nothing really weird, just loves bootyhole. EREN NOW. eren’s like sanji. like literally so fucking loud and so fucking annoying and so fucking GROSS. there spit and lube everywhere, he’s drenched, whined and cries when you don’t let him fuck ur ass

jean(?)— also cried when you don’t let him go through the backdoor:( he’s such a crybaby, fucking your pussy so hard you can’t breathe while his thumbs are both hooked in your ass, i bet that’d feel weird as fuck cause he uses them to pull you back in.

hange— another obvious gross one. they’d be..so hot with it. god. i love team ‘girlcock hange’ btdubs. they’re the kind to finger you while DEMOLISHING your ass, spitting on ur pussy and rubbing your clit to tight and fast you’re dizzy all while they try and dig their dick deep enough to punch your gut.

GOD I WANNA SAY FUCKING REINER BUT I DONT THINK HES REALLY INTO IT :(

yknow who is??

endeavor, i decided he’d be an ass fucker. ooohh yeeeaaahhh… he’s not weird abt it, but the SSSSECOND you say you wanna get your ass ate he’s tossing you on the bed and ripping off your pants. a snogger, shoves his face ALL up in there <3 another one who SPANKS AND SLAPS AND SPITS AND BITES. he’d be like hange, fucking the shit out of your ass with his.. yknow those like, big logs of ground beef you can buy at stores? enji, anyways, and he’s finger blasting ur cunt with two fingers cause they’re big enough that if he fisted you he’d prolly fucking kill you.

k done. can you tell i’ve discovered a new kink guys?????

I HIT THE TAG LIMIT LMFAO

[thatfoxnamedfinley]

To Erase the Past aka Words of Radiance thoughts

Why yes, I was awake until 5:00AM finishing this book, thank you for asking and understanding

Why no, I'm not okay

I'm so proud of Shallan

I'm so disappointed in Moash

I'm so thankful for Kaladin

I'm so triggered by Tangerine (I know this isn't his name but that's what I'm calling him, throw him into the pile with Capsule)

I've become a Dalinar apologist

YOU KNOW THE DRILL

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

Lets GOOOOOooOOOOoooOooooooOOOOo

So last night, I'm whooping and hollering. Sweating. Fist pumping. Being trampled by the last sequences in the book. It's 3:00AM. My roommate who fell asleep downstairs finally makes it up to his room. He looks into my room, eyebrow raised.

Him: I could hear you downstairs.

Me: Okay?

Him: ......it was bad

Me: ...

That is a quick summary of my thoughts of this book. I feel like between these two books I've read like 2 trilogies.

BITCH I KNEW JASNAH WASN'T DEAD, I FUCKING KNEW IT. I EVEN SLAMMED THE BOOK SHUT AND STOOD UP LIKE "I BET YOUR ASS SHE IS IN SHADESMAR SOMEHOW"

*sits down and takes a deep breath*

So apparently Shadesmar is the mythological kingdom of the spren

PATTERN IS AMAZING, I loved him. Ok ok ok when he was first introduced and Shallan and Jasnah were like "damn I'm kinda disappointed." and Jasnah was like "He's a little..."

and Shallan was like *nods sadly* "He's a little retarded?" and Pattern is like spinning in circles in the corner of the room and trying to get up walls but keeps like, slowly sliding down

I almost spat my water out

ok ok so Kaladin is a Surgebinder, Shallan a Lightweaver, Dalinar a Bondsmith and Renarin (wtf this kid is so weird bro) is a...Truthwatcher

Ok I'm sorry, let me consult my notes because my mind is ALL OVER THE PLACE

Very early the glyphs appeared and honestly, we all knew it was the Everstorm. Dalinar FINALLY knowing he wasn't crazy was just so good. There was a moment after the first set appeared and Dalinar is listening to the people in the room. His inner dialogue is to have a straight back and head up despite his exhaustion. Telling himself to be in control. And I'm like DAMN this man really is a leader amongst men. The way he carries himself is just so GENERAL like and so so good!

Even though Dalinar apparently had the fewest pages dedicated to him this book, it really felt like he was looming over the story with how much of this seems to center around him (uniting Alethkar) and how many of the character's POV's intersect with what he doing.

Jasnah? Thinks Dalinar may be one of the best men she has ever known. Syl? Loves Dalinar and thinks he's a good man. Kaladin? Has several moments when he realizes that yes, Dalinar IS a good man and he MUST live. Hell, he was almost part of a plot to kill the king because he and that crew he met were like "Bro, Dalinar should be the king. We all know it." And at first Kaladin was like WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE WE CANT KILL THE KING WERE PROTECTING HIM WTF ARE YOU- wait...Dalinar the king instead?

Kaladin was like

Sadeas was such a bitter ex boyfriend. When he asked his wife to activate all her spies to find something to hurt Dalinar with I'm like BRO WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING DAMAGE DUDE. Admitting to himself that even if Dalinar was the Blackthorn and was still the conquering warlord, he'd kill him regardless because he wanted to be at the top was telling because I was really wondering if he'd ever admit it.

((Adolin sniping tf outta him was so fucking satisfying. Holy SHIT))

Shallan. Ooooouuu girlie! GIRLIE!!! The CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!!!! I liked her in book 1 despite many people saying she was a weakness in the book because Dalinar and Kaladin were just much more INTERESTING than her POV. Brandon Sanderson said "lol ok BET" and look what we got. A cesspit of trauma and growth. The goal? To find Urithiru because it holds secrets of the Voidbringers. Oh, and marry Adolin. Oh, and infiltrate the Ghost Bloods. Oh, AND SAVE THE ENTIRE WORLD NO FUCKING PROBLEM

HOLYYY FUCKKKKK THE REVELATION THAT SHE KILLED HER MOTHER HOLY ACTUAL FUCKKK!! Her dad was PROTECTING HER by making everyone think he did it! I sat back in my chair like yo WTF Shallan. You murked your mom AND your dad. Holy fuck. And I guess her mom tried to kill her because she said Shallan was "one of them" and had powers at a younger age? When we meet Pattern, this isn't the first time Shallan has. Hints to it but Shallan's brain just

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETT

dissociation

The flashbacks were so good. Seeing her brothers (RIP to Heleran, Balat is NUTS he abuses animals and pulls legs off crabs). Her father was horrible. Being surrounded by all the constant yelling, the fear. Being put in her corner and not speaking. Her humor helping her brothers. Despite how afraid she is, it is SHE that holds the family together. It was SHE who got her gambling brother free, who made her brothers laugh.

OOOOO When she was about to join the caravans, there was a line she said...

"What would you do, Vathah," Shallan said in a loud voice, "to erase the past?"

And it's pitch black and you hear the screams of the caravans being attacked by bandits and she's standing on the sand and she's Lightweaving an illusion that she's a QUEEN and her hair is blowing around her and now KNOWING her past I'm like holy FUCK that was so GOOD!!!!

(I was also like holy fuck THERE's Gaz!)

oMg when Jasnah was "assassinated" I did indeed gasp. When Shallan watched the guy stab her in the chest with a knife I was like NO FUCKING WAY BITCH but Sanderson was clever. By NOT having her in the rest of the book and bringing her back in the EPILOGUE it didn't feel like we were cheated. Because Jasnah's death was a huge motivator to Shallan and a catalyst to her change in the book.

yo Shallan is so smart. This bitch infiltrated the Ghostbloods with ALMOST ease because of her abilities. WHEN SHE WENT TO THE HERALD AND AMARAM WAS THERE AND SHALLAN WAS IN THE CORNER like

I'm like this bitch is about to be a fucking PROBLEM

watch for that dark haired cunt in a rimmed hat

rumor has it her name is Veil

ok random gear switch

Sadeas CASUALLY talking about killing Dalinar and Elhokar? BRO what is your DAMAGE???? I get that Alethi are super ambitious and war driven but WTF Sadeas

OOOOOOMGGGGGG

WHEN SZETH CAME BITCH

OOOOMMMMFFGGG I SCREAMED

The chapter was entitled The One Who Hates

like excuse me bitch?

One of my bookmarked notes in my audiobook is "No spren guides him. WHAT????? HOW SWAY????"

We learn later on the nature of his blade but STILL. In the moment I was freaking out. Kaladin has that dream and knew something was wrong. He and Adolin and Dalinar are f.i.g.h.t.i.n.g. f.o.r t.h.e.i.r l.i.v.e.s and Szeth is flying around, sending Adolin flying up to the ceiling and he cuts Kaladin's arm and it goes grey and I'm just reading this chapter

UNSTABLE

UNWELL

My heart was beating so fucking fast. Dalinar is like

"YOU TOOK MY BROTHER FROM ME. YOU WILL NOT TAKE THE KING, YOU WILL NOT TAKE THE ONLY THING OF HIM I HAVE LEFT"

And Szeth is like

"I'm not here for him, Highprince. I'm here for you." Then Dalinar CATCHES the Shardblade in his bare fucking hands and Kaladin and Szeth fall midair from the window and then Szeth flees after Kaladin heals and shows his powers and I'm SHOUTING at the spine of the book

(Adolin sitting outside his father's room the rest of that night because he was scared Szeth would come back to kill his father was just...UGH I LOVE the relationship Adolin and Dalinar have. Adolin idolizes his father so MUCH)

and and and

that part with Shallan (I am so frazzled I'm so sorry I've barely had any sleep and this book HAUNTS me do you understand it HAUNTS me...I had a dream last night about this book)

"Can't run, can't run, can't run....

FIGHT."

And she attacks Tyn and kills her with a SHARDBLADE

Oh I'm sorry? Hello? WHAT???? WTFFF BITCH???

A SHARDBLADDDEEEEEEEE????!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!? I just got goosies again bitch omg I'm actually panting hold on give me a moment

ok sidenote but The Stormfather is kind of a dick???? And to be fair, I'm going to assume after as many Desolations as there were that the spren are tired of helping humanity maybe and that's what Stormfather is talking about. Like "bro this is not my first, second, third or even eightieth rodeo. everytime it's the same and SOMEHOW humanity still finds new and clever ways to disappoint me. So...HELP YOU? lmfao" And I know we'll learn more about it so I'm willing to accept that thought process for now but at the end when he's talking to Dalinar (EXCUSE ME IS THE STORMFATHER DALINAR'S *SPREN* NOW???????????) I was like this Stormfather is a little bit of a bitch. This was my INITIAL reading because my adrenaline was still through the roof after

KALADIN FOUGHT SZETH AND SHALLAN TELEPORTED THE ARMY TO URITHIRU

but after thinking about it I was like yeah no I get it. He's seen this movie in theaters so many times and has to pretend to be excited but he really is just pissed his friends keep forcing him to come

Sebarial and Wit were iconic. Their insults were so fucking good. During the end when they were all making their way to the Oathgate and Sebarial was drunk and Palona was reading a book and Dalinar was like ????

AMARAM GOT PUT IN HIS PLACE bye bitch

Aladar, Roion (r.i.p you cowardly prince, you actually did us a solid in the end, and I underestimated both you and your kin. salute) and Sebarial joining him to form a force of 30k against the Parshendi that were SINGING THEIR LITTLE HEARTS OUT for the apocalypse

KALADIN REALIZING THAT ELOKHAR WAS DALINAR'S TIEN ARRGgggggg *squeezes stress ball*

Then Syl. My glorious Syl.

"YOUT WILL MATTERS NOT!" Syl shouted. "YOU CANNOT HOLD ME BACK IF HE SPEAKS THE WORDS! KALADIN! SAY THEM!"

BITCHHHHH I was *unhinged* Then Kaladin lit up like a fucking Christmas tree

I am so disappointed in Moash. I want to say I get it but like...MOASH. REALLY? After all that? After being Kaladin's friend and OH YOU KNOW him giving you a Shardblade and Plate because he trusted you and now we're here

Though he did get 1/18th of a brownie point for not letting anyone else touch Kaladin. Then he lost 1,476,998 brownie points for punching Kaladin so hard that his ribs broke INWARD. "Oops I hit him harder than I meant to." Are you fucking kidding me Moash. Are you? Because you're an EMBARRASSMENT. I hope when we see him next it's ON SITE. Count your fucking days, bro

So...Szeth's weapon was an Honorblade, a weapon of the Heralds....? And two of them are back? The one that Amaram snatched up (Herald of War) and the one that saved Szeth (Herald of Justice). They are returning. So now Szeth is just a normal human being with a normal life...? I'm very VERY interested in Szeth's development and where he goes. I want him on our side so bad and idk how tf Brandon Sanderson plans to do it but I just need it to happen

Adolin murdering Sadeas was SO satisfying. Sadeas going on and on and ON. That isn't it SO CONVENENIENT that the head of Dalinar's guard and Adolin's betrothed are both Radiants and that Dalinar has an ulterior motive. And Adolin is like WHY SADEAS? WHY are you like this. What is your damage? And Sadeas is like WELL if Dalinar stays alive then I can't be more powerful, so lololololol

And Adolin is like

OMG I FORGOT tO MENTION ADOLIN's DUEL

amazing. so good. captivating. unexpected. Adolin grappling from behind and they won!

"Dalinar growled softly. It was a sound Kaladin had never heard from him, The growl of a beast on a chain. It surprised him. " ooohhh?????

And no one standing to help and Kaladin like "literally hold my beer" then when he asked for his boon I was like welp FUCK here we go

Then he was thrown in jail and I was like YUP that tracks

I absolutely LOVED his book. Truly. I liked it better than the first if that's even possible. It made me appreciate book 1 even more because of the world building and set up.

side notes from my audiobook bookmarks:

Kaladin mentions Dalinar's eyes a lot mmmhmmmm

"Dalinar Kholin slowly stood up. He moved like a rolling boulder. Inevitable, implacable." oh. OH?

PATTERN CAN READ DAWNCHANT what a g

"I wouldn't want you to go flying off on me. You know, flying off in an angry tirade." Wit is a legend, I love that he seems to be all knowing and everywhere he needs to be for certain characters. WHO/WHAT IS HE?

Renarin is...I don't have words. What in Damnation are you doing, man? Because he's llike WERE ALL GUNNA DIE WERE ALL GUNNA DIE then they don't so like...how reliable are his Truthwatching abilities?

Shallan and Kaladin EYEBALLING EACH OTHER????? Thinking about each other????? HMMMMMMM???

"He danced with the slayer of kings" HOLLLLYYY FUCK IM *UNHINGED* RN DALINAR YOU ARE TRULY A GOAT AMONGST GOATS <- actually quote from my bookmark

Gallant not fleeing the battlefield is actually iconic

Shallan and Dalinar looking out below and people teleporting to their location and saying "Life before Death, Radiant" is, I fear, legendary

Ok phew I'm so tired from this post, I needed to spit my thoughts out before reading book 3 (which is apparently about Dalinar and I am already such a Dalinar apologist that I can't WAIT)

ok bye *snooze*

OH!! AND TANGERINE BEING EItHER RETARDED OR A GENIUS ON ANY GIVEN DAY bro WHAT and THAT is what you're going off of? THAT is why you're assassinating everyone???? Bro you are FUCKED

[moodywyrm]

📢VI WITH NIP PIERCINGS📢VI WITH NIP PIERCINGS📢

And they’re so sensitive too! And she’s such a whiner aww!! She’s sputtering and squealing and oh so out of breath whenever they’re played with<3

I just wanna suck on her tiddies sooo bad and pull the piercings with my teeth<3

I've been thinking about this ask all day because Fuck. I also have like ,,,, a severe love for Vi's boobs? Like they look so fucking good I wanna suck on em <3

She does strike me as the type to be like, ,,, super wary of nip piercings at first just because a needle? in her titty? not fucking likely. until one day she's like .,,,, well ,,,, they do look cute. Next thing she knows she has two pretty steel barbells decorating two very sore nipples. The healing process was a bitch because she kept getting them caught on shit, but she managed. And she loves them! They look super fucking cool and them make her feel confident!

What she did not expect though ,,, sensitivity. From what I've heard, getting your nipples pierced makes them way more sensitive. And Vi's tits were already super sensitive before, like soak her panties with a few touches sensitive. Can you fucking imagine adding to that?

You two were together before she got them pierced, so you knew they were sensitive. And you were there through the healing process, which means the second she could Safely let you play with them, you dragged her into the bedroom and latched on.

She's sat in your lap, grinding into you as you leave hickies all over her tits, teasing her by avoiding her nipples.

"Pumpkin, please," She whines, arching her back and shoving her tits into your face. Her voice is so high and breathy and needy, you just say fuck it and suck one pretty pierced nub into your mouth.

And Vi fucking wails, feeling the full extent of the pleasure when you bring one hand up to roll the neglected bud between your fingers. It feels so fucking good to finally have her tits back in your hands and mouth, the heft of them against you turning your brain to mush. Vi's loving every second of it, scrambling for purchase and grinding down into you even harder, trying to get any friction at all.

"Feels so fucking good holy shit baby – ah – 'm sensitive, shit," She babbles, whimpering when you shove one hand down her pants, rubbing at her needy clit while focusing your attention on her tits.

You switch to her other nipple, laving at the bud and gently tugging the barbell into your mouth. Vi squeals, clawing at your back and pressing you against her chest even more. It makes her head fuzzy, the full extent of the pleasure. Going months without true nipple stimulation, plus the added sensitivity of the piercings, all made her wildly needy and she could feel her orgasm creeping up on her. She whines, grinding against your fingers even harder, begging you to keeping playing with her nipples.

You obey, pulling and nipping at the barbells, but you shift your hand down a little bit so that you can slip two fingers into Vi's needy little cunt and grinding your palm against her clit.

"That's it pretty girl, use me," You whisper before immediately latching back onto her tits, doubling your efforts to kiss and lick and pull at her sensitive nipples. Vi whines, grinding down harder and harder, head lolling back at the sheer sensitivity of it all.

"Fuck, you're gonna make me cum pumpkin, shit, shit, ah-"

She can't get anything more out before she cries out, shaking against you, needy cunt clenching and leaking into your palm and her pants. She's trembling, her tits shaking with how hard she's cumming, and you're entranced, leaving gentle, open mouthed kisses all over her chest.

By the time Vi comes down, she's huffing and slumping into your hold, kissing you so gently it makes your heart ache. You think she's gonna leave it at that, until she presses you down into the bed and slides down your body, taking special care to massage your tits before whispering to you.

"Hmm, maybe you should get yours pierced, feels really fucking good, pumpkin."