#Kunikida worried and the one time he needs his words to get across to Dazai he just can't

[chr0n1c-ag0ny]

(cw: talk of suicide, self harm, etc.)

Kunidazai's first kiss not being some moment of realization or confession of feelings, not some romance movie moment, it's not followed by smiles or laughs, or even words.

No.

Their first kiss came months after the pair had been partnered up at the ADA. Kunikida had thought he'd seen it all. He'd learned to call Dazai at least twice a day, once in the morning and once at night, three times if they didn't have work, more than that if Dazai never showed up. He'd learned how to tell a bad day from a bad day just by the sound of the other man's voice. He'd spent long nights and weekends and days off (most of which were sick days he took off for Dazai's sake) taking care of the other man, changing bandages hand holding his hand. He didn't think it could get any worse.

but it did, it found a way, Kunikida had stopped Dazai from genuinely making an attempt on his life (he'd stopped his more... spur of the moment attempts, the ones that had minimal effort or true intent to them, before. they were always scary even if he knew dazai would more or less walk away unscathed, but this was different), barging through his door just in time to keep the blade from hitting his wrist that final time.

Dazai wasn't there, for lack of a better word, sitting there, loosely conscious, as Kunikida re-wrapped new and old wounds, as he wiped the blood off of him, as he helped him change into new clothes. Kunikida could smell the alcohol wafting off of him, stared into blank, empty eyes, talked to deaf ears, hoping to coax his partner back from his absent haze, but nothing broke the blur his partner was stuck in.

he tugged him up off the floor and onto the couch, knowing it was a safe 'no-mans-land' both could sit on without waking up dark memories. he wanted to hold him, wanted to take him into his arms and never let go, but he didn't know if he was allowed, if he could touch Dazai like that, so he just sat and watched, not knowing what to do, when Dazai suddenly spoke.

"why?" his voice a whisper, "why do you even care so much?"

and he would try and put it into words, tried to tell him he deserved to be cared for and to have people worry for him, that he was his partner and it was his job to worry, that he loved him goddammit and he was scared of losing him, but nothing seems to reach Dazai.

he he leans forward, slow enough for Dazai to pull away even in the state he was in if need be, and kissed him. not on the lips, this wasn't a profession of love, no, no he presses his lips to the curve between his nose and his cheek.

- I don't want to lose you. I love you. it hurts and is stained with tears, but it's there and I don't want it to go away. I don't want you to go away. stay here, please, please stay here - He hopes to say.

the kiss is soft, so soft he's not sure Dazai could feel it, but any firmer and he thinks he might shatter his partner. He keeps placing little butterfly kisses to his cheek and the bridge of his nose regardless, tasting the salt of their shared tears. he doesn't even know why he did it, it wasn't something he ever thought of doing, but he didn't know how else to tell Dazai how he felt, so he showed him.

Dazai sinks into it, tries to make Kunikida kiss him in earnest, but Kunikida knows better than to try and let Dazai self medicate with physical affections, and instead takes him close, hugging him tighter than he's ever hugged anyone before, as if to hold the brunette together. Dazai lets him with a huff. Kunikida rests his lips against the man's greasy hair, holding his partner as close as he could. they're both crying. it hurts. the kiss burned and ached and might as well be a bruise festering on both of their faces. but neither of them would trade it for the world, cause there is some understanding in it.

Dazai calls Kunikida next time.

[4unnyr0se]

❥ cherry soda | osamu dazai

warnings: semi-public sex, office sex, unprotected sex, fem! reader, dazai is a smug brat, roughness, cunnilingus, making out, dirty talk, friends to lovers, pet names, dazai is a little bit of a pervert, innocent(?) reader, possessive(?) dazai, mentions of other ADA members, asphyxiation if you squint

word count -> 3.4k

MDNI | 18+ content

The sound of rustling papers and feet running in every which way filled the bullpen of the Armed Detective Agency, making quiet the most luxurious thing there was in that small Yokohama office. Kunikida screaming at Ranpo to do his work, Yosano was no doubt cutting open something (or someone), and the rest of them were out on a mission to collect intel on a potential bank robbery.

There was no one else free in the agency except you and a certain suicidal maniac, Osamu Dazai. You two got along fine, probably even better than just fine. Amazingly was the right word. Even though Dazai was probably one of the most annoying people on Earth, the two of you had formed a certain kinship that rivaled the one he previously had in the Port Mafia. Dazai was the first to tell you of his past, making you swear to secrecy. And you did so in a heartbeat of course, how could you not? Those pleading brown eyes were simply just too gorgeous to refuse a request like that.

Dazai knew of the effect he had on you, and he was so fucking smug about it. Copying papers? He would pout his lips at you and cup his cheeks with his bandaged hands, asking you if you would be a darling girl and copy his paperwork while you were still standing up. After all, the copier was just so far away, and it was so much work getting up off his ass.

Or that other time when you gave him your lunch because he forgot to bring his own, which made Kunikida give him a look so sharp it could kill. Kunikida tried to talk you out of it but no, your heart was set on making sure your best friend was happy. And Dazai was ecstatic, the meal being sweetened only by Kunikida’s furiously red face. 

Dazai smiled at you from across the bullpen, frowning when you didn’t catch his friendly glances. Out of the two of you, you just had to be the responsible one. Making sure that due dates were met, cleaning up if anyone made a spill, blah blah blah. It was adorable but infuriating, the way you so carefully looked after the needs of others. So painfully fucking adorable that Dazai couldn’t help but feel himself get hard when you bent over to pick something up that Atsushi dropped, always patting him on his head gingerly. The way you were ever so clumsy with your drinks, spilling them onto your tight little pencil skirts about half of the time. Dazai would hear your sickly sweet voice curse under your breath as you squeezed your legs together to avoid getting the sticky soda on the hardwood below; you were always so careful about respecting the office. It was practically torture for Dazai, like some divine punishment for his misdeeds. How he longed to be the one making those noises roll off your pretty tongue, to relish in your cute sounds that should be caused by him and him alone, not your silly but stupid mistakes. 

“Hey, Dazai, are you there?” Dazai blinked and snapped out of his thoughts, not having noticed that he was still glaring at you whilst he was lost in his perverted thoughts. “You’ve been staring at me for a while and you looked pretty mad, is everything okay?” You asked, ruffling his curly brown hair atop his head.

Dazai relaxed and smiled softly at you, resting his face on his left hand. His right hand reached up to caress your soft face, his bandaged thumb running over your cheekbone. “I’m quite alright, don’t worry about it. Just a little lost in thought is all.” He assured you, crossing one leg over the other to hide his growing erection. “You’re done with your paperwork for now, right?”

“Yeah, it took a while. Why, did you need something?” You ask, taking his cold hand off of your cheek.

“Because everyone else went out for lunch while you were filling out forms, and I wasn’t invited because Kunikida’s mad at me for coming in late.” Dazai stuck his tongue out at the last part, crossing his arms childishly. “He definitely has something up his ass, that’s for sure.”

You giggled and covered your mouth, getting a tiny bit of red lipstick on your palm. “Honestly I can’t blame him, you do have a nasty habit of coming in late. But he’s always had a temper, so don’t think much of it.” You patted him on the shoulder, smiling at him gently. You felt your stomach rumble, winching at the strange noise your body made. “Oh, I guess I’m hungry. I better go see what snacks Ranpo has on his desk. Do you think he’ll notice.?”

“He’s Ranpo. He notices everything.”

“Whatever, I’ll just buy him some more later.” You shrugged and walked over to Ranpo’s desk, opening up one of the many snack-filled drawers to take out a bag of potato chips. The bag opened with a loud crinkle, the chips rubbing against each other as your hand shuffled around in the plastic bag. You snacked on the crunchy treat, admiring how salty it was on your tongue. “Hm, I thought Ranpo was more of a sweets kind of person. Good thing they don’t put me out on many detective missions.” You laughed, walking over to Dazai and shaking the bag in front of his face. “You want?”

Dazai shook his head and leaned back even further into his chair, his arm resting on the back of his head. “You know what I would like, though?” He purred, a smirk covering his handsome face. “A cherry soda from the break room fridge, those things are damn good.”

You nodded, turning on your heels to get him his desired beverage. Dazai admired how your ass looked as you walked away, how the short little skirt you wore hugged your curves perfectly. You had to be wearing those short skirts to get a rise out of him, there wasn’t another explanation. Dazai loved the days where you wore pencil skirts and hated whenever you were more modest, subtly hinting how we liked short skirts more than long skirts. Was it a scumbag move on his part? Absolutely. But did he feel guilty about it? Not one bit. He liked what he liked and there wasn’t any shame in that, at least according to Dazai.

You returned from the breakroom holding two cans of the delicious cherry soda, the intricate artwork on the can being covered by your soft and cold hands. You placed a can down on Dazai’s desk, being careful to use a coaster as to not ruin the wood beneath. Opening the can with your thumb, the cold metal touched your lips as the carbonated drink ran down your throat, hitting your taste buds in just the right way that you couldn’t help but sigh at the immaculate taste.

“I haven’t had this in forever, I think I forgot that we had it. It was in the very back of the fridge by that expired cheese that Atsushi forgot to throw out.” You chuckled, sitting down on the edge of Dazai’s desk. He smirked to himself and opened his own can, nodding in approval as the cherry liquid touched his tongue. 

“As if I’d ever forget about something as delicious as this, darling.” Dazai purred, sitting up in his chair to stare into your eyes. He noticed the way your cheeks took on just the faintest tint of red as he spoke to you, a shade so faint that it would be invisible to the untrained eye. 

You took another sip of the soda, neglecting to notice how the fizzling red liquid dripped off of your chin and onto your white blouse, creating a little pink stain on the delicate fabric. Your lipstick was long ruined, red lip marks adorning the brim of the soda can. Instead, your lips shone with the remnants of the soda. Dazai wondered if the soda’s romantic flavor stuck on your lips, on your tongue. If once the soda ran out, would be still be able to taste it on your adorable mouth?

“Cutie, you got a little something on your shirt.” Dazai pointed to the stain on your left breast, poking it softly. “Right there.” He smirked once more, raising an eyebrow. “Did you seriously not notice? How adorable.”

You blushed and set down the cherry soda on the desk beneath you, looking down at your ruined shirt. “Oh, I guess I did. Maybe I should go home and change while the others are out.”

Dazai shook his head and stood up, grabbing onto your hands with his own. Despite the fact that you were perched on his desk, the detective loomed tall over your form. He rubbed the backs of your hands with his thumb, tutting at you softly. 

“No, no, I won’t have that. You got soda all over your chin, darling.” He spoke, leaning down so hot breath could be felt against your blushing face. “Why don’t you let me get you nice and cleaned up before the others return, yeah? You already do so much for me.” His hands released yours, instead being placed on your waist. “Make a choice cutie, they’ll be back soon.”

Your pupils widened as you felt Dazai’s breath on your face, the sensation of his hands on your wasit only causing the blush on your face to turn into a fiery inferno of pink. “O-okay, you can do it.” You whispered softly, your lips mere centimeters from his own. You had always found Dazai attractive, and now he was painfully close to snapping the tension between the two of you in half.

“Good girl,” Dazai slammed his lips onto your, wasting no time prying open your mouth with his tongue to explore your wet cavern. Your teeth clashes together in a desperate and molten kiss, your hands finding the ends of his chestnut hair. “So good for me.”

Dazai’s hands tugged onto your waist, pulling you against his torso. He lifted up your legs and wrapped them around his own waist, his large and calloused hands supporting your thighs underneath. He groaned into the kiss, feeling your core throb against his clothed and painfully hard cock. “Fuck, God you’re so fucking hot.” He mumbled against your lips, pulling away from the kiss to fill his lungs with air. A string of saliva connected your lips, making you look like the prettiest whore Dazai had ever seen. 

“Been wanting to do that for so long baby,” He moaned, squeezing the plush and supple skin of your thighs. You had neglected to wear your usual black stockings that day, which only drove Dazai when more wild. With your legs wrapped around him, he walked over to Fukuzawa’s office and set you down onto his bosses desk, shoving important papers and other such items off. He kicked the door closed with his foot and then practically pounced on you, his lips meeting yours once more in a wanton display of desire.

“Let’s get this dirty shirt off of you, yeah? Wanna see those gorgeous tits you’re always flaunting in my fucking face.” Dazai muttered against your ear, biting on the shell. His skilled hands undid the buttons of your blouse with ease, tossing it in some random corner that he didn’t care for. He took a second to admire your bra, it was black and lacy, just how he liked his lingerie. “Shit, did you wear this just for me darling?” He smirked, unclipping it from behind with little struggle.

“M-maybe I did, who knows?” You moaned, gasping as the cold air of Fukuzawa’s office made your nipples nice and hard. Dazai groaned at the sight and shoved you down onto the desk, your legs dangling off of the furniture in a beautiful display. His right hand pinched and squeezed your delicate nipple, rolling it in between his thumb and index finger while his mouth became occupied with sucking on your left breast, rolling the brusing skin on his tongue. His teeth were merciless and unforgiving, making absolutely sure to leave bruises once he was done with you.

Wanton moans and whimpers left your mouth as Dazai ravishes your chest, the pool of arousal in your stomach only growing with every pinch and bite and squeeze of your sensitive chest. “D-Dazai!” You cried out, forcibly removing Dazai’s mouth from your breast. “Too much, way too much.”

“Aw, cmon. You’re no fun.” Dazai pouted, his attention shifting to your shaking legs. “Oh, do you just want attention elsewhere darling?” His slender fingers slid down your breasts and under your skirt, teasing the lining of your stockings. He could feel your wetness through the black tights, sighing in pleasue at the sensation of your arousal at his fingertips. “Fuck, you’re so wet. All for me, right? Don’t worry sweetheart, let me take care of you.”

Dazai slid off your skirt and stockings, tossing it into a different corner. He wanted so desperately to rip those clothes off, but he decided to be diligent about making sure that you had something to wear once the others got back. Fuck, Dazai wanted to show off what he did to you so badly. 

“Matching panties baby? Dirty girl, so dirty. And all for me too.” Dazai shoved your soaked panties to the side, taking in how wet and needy you were for him. “God, you’re soaked. You look so damn good, I gotta have a taste. Wonder if you taste as good down here as you do up there, princess.” Dazai lifted up your thighs and rested them on his shoulders, diving in to lap and suck at your sobbing folds. His nose brushed against your throbbing clit, causing your hand to grab onto his chestnut curls tightly. “Fuck! Dazai, fuck!” You whimpered, squeezing his head between your shaking thighs. 

Dazai hummed into your folds, his tongue desperately lapping at them like he was the thirstiest man on Earth, like he hadn’t eaten in days. The way his tongue expertly moved from licking stripes on your labia to sucking relentlessly on your clit made you see stars, the coil in your stomach growing so tight that it could burst at any moment. 

“Dazai, oh fuck, I’m close!” You robbed, your orgasm boudn to approach at any moment. Just as you were about to feel complete euphoria, Dazai stopped eating you out like a starved man. He pulled himself out of your thighs and offered you a teasing smirk, his plush lips coated in your desperate slick.

“Hey, what the fuck! I was so close!” You whined, the momentum of your orgasm fading away. 

Dazai shook his head and wiped his mouth off with the back of his bandaged hand, removing his belt as well as his slacks and boxers. His shirt and trenchcoat were already long gone, just the bolo tie hung around his neck. His cock sprung to life, slapping itself onto his lean yet toned abdomen. “Nuh-uh pretty girl, you only get to cum if it’s on my cock, understand?” He took your mouth in his once more, forcing you to taste your arousal that lingered on his teasing tongue. 

He pushed you down onto the desk gently, lifting your legs so they were spread over his lean shoulders. His cock playfully slapped at your entrance, teasingly slipping in between the soaked folds. 

“Stop fucking teasing me!” You begged, your hands squeezing onto your breasts. Dazai delighted in the show, adoring how you were so desperate for him and only him. “Tch, I don’t think you’re in any positon to make demands here, darling.” Dazai smiled down on you, kissing you forehead chastly. “But I’ll make an exception for once since you look so fucking sexy right now.”

Dazai’s hand pumped his cock a few times, alinging it with your entrance. He slid himself in without a problem, gasping as how tight and wet you were. “S-shit baby, how are you this tight? You don’t let anyone else fuck you, hm? Good fucking girl.” 

His hips snapped against yours in a frenzy, his thick cock hitting every place it needed to make you see stars once more. It slammed against your spongy cervix over and over again, showing you absolutely no mercy. Your pussy clenched around him as your wanton screams and cries of pleasure filled the office, the desk below you being drenched in sweat. The sound of skin clapping against skin echoed against the walls as his balls repeatedly slapped against your ass, both of your orgasms drawing close. 

“God, you’re squeezing me too damn tight darling, looks like you want me to cum quickly yeah?” Dazai growled, leaning down to desperately kiss your already swollen lips. “Is that what you want, hm? Want me to cum so you can get back to your precious work?” He spoke in a mocking tone, his quick thrusts during into powerful slams inside of you to punctuate his sentences. 

“N-no Dazai, that’s not-holy fuck! Right there, right there, right there!” You sobbed as the tip of his cock finally reached your G-spot, your orgasm bound to approach at any seocnd. “Fuck me, please! I’m so fucking close, fuck!”

“So adorably filthy for me darling.” Dazai chuckled darkly, his hand flying down to put pressure on your pretty little neck. “Fucking cum for me baby, cum around my cock while I fuck you like I own you.”

His lewd words were all that you needed to let go around him, the coil in your stomach snapping in half as your orgasm hit you like a runaway train. Your mouth opened in a silent scream, eyes squeezing shut as you felt euphoria for what seemed like the very first time in forever. 

Dazai felt his orgam approach, shifting your legs so only one of them rested on his shoulders. The other leg was being propped up his his hand, giving him a deeper and far better angle. “Shit, gonna fucking cum! Fuck baby, gonna cum inside. Ngh, fuck, fuck!” He groaned, hot and sticky ropes of his release coating the walls of your pussy. You sighed at the warm feeling in your core, looking up to admire Dazai’s gorgeous face that was covered in a post-orgasmic glow.

“Shit…sorry for not using a condom.” Dazai chuckled, pulling his cock out of you. You whined at the sudden feeling of emptiness, sitting up straight and cracking your back. “You’re just too damn irresitable, princess.” He bent down to pick his clothes up off the office floor, throwing your clothes onto your lap as well. His soft lips met the top of your head, treating you so gently, as if you were made of the finest glass in all of Japan.

“Such a gentleman,” you spoke, smirking at Dazai as you put on the rest of your clothes. “Thanks for not ripping these off of me, I hate buying new clothes. They alwasy try to upsell you at the shops.”

“You do realize it’s their job to sell you crap you don’t need, right?”

“Just because your dick was in me a couple minutes ago doesn’t give you the right to sass me, mister.” You rose an eyebrow, standing up. Your legs wobbled a little in your high heels which made Dazai laugh to himself, giving you his bicep for support. “Please, allow me.”

“Thanks,” you smiled at him, walking out of Fukuzawa’s office. You breathed a sigh of relief as the bullpen remained completely empty. “Oh thank god, for some reason I thought that they had all gotten back and could hear us fucking.” 

Dazai sighed in annoyance at the thought of that, placing a hand on his hip as he walked you to your desk. “I think Kunikida would actually murder us if he knew we fucked on Fukuzawa’s desk. Let’s keep that a secret, alright?” He smirked, kissing you on the forehead once more as you took a seat in your desk chair.

“Alright.”

Just as you finished speaking those words, the door to the bullpen slammed open the rest of the ADA came through, some carrying their leftovers from lunch. As they all got situated, Atsushi sat down next to Dazai with an innocent look on his face. “So, what did you do for lunch? Sorry you couldn’t come, Kunikida is still pissed.” He awkawrdly laughed, rubbing the back of his neck.

Dazai smirked and looked over at you briefly, admiring how happy you looked when chatting with Yosano.

“Not much, just had a cherry soda.”

[star-centric]

Can you do some headcannons on Kunikida from bsd and how he would act in a relationship? Like what type of dates they’d go on, his love language, etc. tysm!

- 🥀

PAIRING: Kunikida x Gender Neutral!Reader

NOTE: I love Kunikida- that is all (and sorry that this came out so late)!

CW: fluff, gender neutral reader

Relationship Headcanons with Kunikida!

Being in a relationship with Kunikida is more exciting than people think. He’s still as diligent as always, but you get to see a certain softness to him that isn’t shown as much

He still acts the same- but he’s a bit more…delicate now. He catches himself remembering that you’re not just his friend anymore and that you’re something more to him (like he’s been wanting for a while). It’s hard to not notice the tips of his ears growing red when he has his vulnerable moments with you, but it’s welcomed nonetheless

I fully believe he asked you out first- had an entire plan written down in his notebook with no room to error. Even with everything written and perfected to a T, he still stumbled a bit in his confession, light blush across his cheeks but firm in his words. It’s a moment that you keep close to you and bring up whenever you’re alone together (sometimes to tease him- much to his dismay)

If you guys work together, he doesn’t treat you like you’re weak because he knows that you’re not- but don’t be surprised if he’s hovering around you more when you get back from a mission. He’s still professional- just more worried- but he still has faith in you!

If you guys don’t work together, he makes time out of his schedule daily to see you. He makes sure that it falls on your lunch break and it doesn’t get interrupted by anyone (unless it’s a serious mission, but expect him to be a little upset when he confronts the threat)

He always makes sure to walk you to and from work- no exceptions

Kunikida would be the one to usually plan your dates- whether it’s his idea or yours. If there’s something specific that you want to do, you can expect him to get all of the information/details and plan it to where there’s no room for a mistake

(just make sure that you’re not pranking him like Dazai because he will take it literal)

He prefers something calm for your dates- he already gets all of the excitement he needs from the agency, so any chance he can relax and do it with you he’s taking it. He also finds it easier to unwind with you, feeling the stress from the day lift from his shoulders just being with you

Kunikida’s love language is act of service! He goes out of his way to make you’re taken care of. It may seem minor to some and not a big deal, but it’s just one of the many ways to show that he cares about you

He’s not much of a touchy person in the beginning of your relationship, but he starts to show a little more physical affection as it progresses. It starts out small- from pinkies brushing against one another without flinching to small hugs before saying goodnight. He doesn’t do much in front of everyone besides handholding, but he does start to do more behind closed doors and in the privacy of your homes

Kunikida has a whole section in his notebook dedicated to you (including future dates)- your likes, dislikes, anniversaries, etc. You never have to worry about him forgetting something because he already has it written down

It takes a while before Kunikida says “I love you”, but I do believe that he would say it first. He’ll also be the first one to bring up the notion of moving in together under a tactical guise (but really it’s just because he craves you more and the times that he sees you now isn’t enough)

He’s the definition of “you fell first, but he fell harder”

Kunikida feels at peace with you. Even if you didn’t match all of his ideals for his ideal partner (because realistically no one probably would), he’s content with that. You mesh so well with him, and honestly- it’s hard to picture anyone else being his partner but you

[19zai]

When Shadows Close In

The evening sun shown through the Agency window, illuminating the desks and scattered papers. Dazai Osamu sat at his desk, absentmindedly spinning a pen between his fingers. Papers were strewn haphazard across the surface, mingling with half finished reports and a cold cup of coffee that had lost its warmth. The soft hum of conversations filled the air, punctuated by the rhythmic tapping of keyboards and the occasional laughter of his colleagues.

He glanced at the clock, it's hands ticking steadily, but the minutes felt stretched, taunting him with the knowledge that work would be over in about an hour. Dazai had a bet going on with Ranpo of how long he could sit at his desk, pretending to do work to get Kunikida of his back, before kunikida realized he hadn't done any work at all that day. Sweat dropped down his forehead, it was way to hot in the office in his opinion.

Dazai had one hour left of work to get through before he could win the bet. Most of the others had left earlier, done with their work. Only Dazai, Ranpo, Fukazawa, Yosano, and Kunikida were left. Not surprised. Dazai would have left, but then he would lose the bet, not that there was a prize, but he still wanted to be at the Greatest Detective Ranpo.

The clock continued to click, Dazai getting happier the longer Kunikida stays focused on his own work, and Ranpo himself was getting worried he may lose a bet. His first loss ever. Against Dazai of all people. Never.

Then, startling all of them, the Agency door loudly opened, as the one and only Port Mafia Leader walked in. He walked around as if he owned the place, the others still to stunned to speak. Who.. No why would he even be here in the first place? This is literally his enemy's work area. He couldn't have been that stupid.. Is he?

Either way, Mori continued his way to Fukazawa's office, who opens the door and shut it, muttering voices coming from inside. Even Ranpo hadn't expected that. No one had. He didn't even say a word, just walking in like that. They'll just have to keep their eyes on him, at all costs this time.

"Dazai. Come see me in my office." Fukazawa says, startling them all out of their overthinking transes. Mori still in his office as well.

Dazai froze. No. He could not go into the same room Mori was currently in. Never. His leads moved before his brain could react though, and his leads always followed orders, walking up to Fukazawa and walking into the room.

"I have filed a law against Mori, you see. I know what happens to Yosano in the Mafia, and will use that to my advantage. I somehow do not know of your side of the situation though, and If you could tell me it it, I can also use it against Mori, and possibly even take down the entire Mafia. We couldn't do it before, as he had something we needed, but now that we have it back... We can try to take them all down at once." Fukazawa explained.

Well.. that wasn't what Dazai was expecting, but it's better then being yelled at like he had assumed. He nods to Fukazawa and sits down on the chair next to the one Mori was in, quickly explaining what Mori and the Mafia did to him.

It was mostly about some missions he had been forced to do, what would happen afterwards if he failed. The tests and experiments Mori did on him so he would become so strong nothing could take him down. How because of Mori, he can no longer be poisoned and knows how to do many medical things. Of course also the fact that he was abused by him, though Dazai kept that part short.

Fukazawa accepted what Dazai said, or vaguely mentioned and sent him on his way. Things would have stayed fine, he would have gone back to his desk and continued the bet with Ranpo, Wich he still had around twenty-five minutes left to do so. If only things could ever be easy on Dazai.

As soon as he stood up, Mori had grabbed onto his arm, pulling him towards himself, and harshly grabbing his hair with the other, yaking him towards his face. " I'll kill you. I'll kill you and I'll kill Chuuya and you'll never see the end of it. I swear... I will win... And I will kill you and your stupid little ADA friends will die with you!" Mori shouted directly into his ear, so unlike his normal calm demeanor.

Fukazawa, seeing the interaction, grabbed Moris hands and forced him to let go, a bruise clearly made on Dazai's arm from his insane grip on him, his hair disheveled from his other hand yanking him by it.

Dazai ran out of the room as soon as his dirty hands we off of him, sobbing as he stepped our of the room. So many things had happened in those few seconds. The room felt stuffy as all eyes turned on him, his breathing catching in his throat as he struggles to breath.

Mori cam walking out of the room, a smirk on his face as he passed Dazai, slamming the door shut behind him.

Dazai falls to the ground, struggling to breath, scared out of his mind all though the thoughts, what HE had said, scared him more then he thought it would.

Yosano, Kunikida and Ranpo were distraught, worried for Dazai as he bursted out of the room in tears. Fukazawa and Mori leaving soon after and Fukazawa shouts and yells at Mori about how wrong he was, and how he would never lay a hand on anyone again.

Lay a hand on anyone ever again. The other detectives stood shook while Ranpo quickly explained what he had deducted. "Mori grabbed Dazai and told him some... Pretty horrible stuff." Ranpo quickly explained, basically running toward Dazai who sat on the ground, struggling to breath still.

Yosano and Kunikida, finally letting Ranpo's words sink in and getting extremely worried also rush towards Dazai.

"Hey! Hey! Deep breaths Dazai please. He can't hurt you, he won't ever touch you again. You won't even have to see him okay? Just call down, take a deep breath." Yosano exclaimed, trying to calm Dazai down while slowing her breathing to get dazai to copy her.

Dazai struggled, but with Kunikida and Ranpo holding his shoulder and hand gently, and Yosano calming and muttering reassurances, he began to calm down more, the tears stopped and a that was left were some sniffles and ragged breathing.

Fukazawa rushes back inside after almost throwing Mori out through the window but instead pushed him outside of the Agency's doors. His present was grounding.

"I-I'm okay. Sorry about that. I... Didn't know I'd react like that.. sorry." Dazai whispered, clearly still shaky.

"Don't apologize.. it wasn't your fault. It's that horrible idiots fault. No need to apologize. Just calm down." Kunikida reassured.

If someone were to say the four of them left after that to get ice cream and some snacks, you'd be correct. If someone said that Ranpo gave Dazai the benefit of the doubt on the bet, you'd also be correct. Ranpo was never going to forget the huge smile that crossed his face after saying that he won the bet. Dazai may never forget or forgive what happens, not they they blame him, but now he has friends and people he can trust with anything. They were definitely a lot closer together then before. I guess that's a good thing.

[mistressoftheelderitchwhorehouse]

Princess Passing in the Night

Author's Note: Welcome to the shit show. Today I decided to experiment a bit with my style. Is it to our detriment? Who knows.

Trigger Warnings: Guns, canon typical violence, blood.

Fandom: Bungo Stray Dogs

Character Pairings: Atsushi x Reader (one sided) Chuuya x Reader

----------------‐--------------------------------------------------

Astushi Nakajima was used to many things. Kidnappings, starving, and getting his limbs "helpfully" removed. However, this... This was new.

"Hold on, ma'am! We're almost there!"

God, how did he get in this mess in the first place?

---------‐---‐-----------------------------------------------------

"Okay, so I need pickled plums, rice, two pounds of fishing line... The hell is that even for, Dazai?"

Atsushi sighed and pocketed the list. Despite the sun shining down on the port city, cold nipped at his ears and he was regretting not bringing a jacket or sweater with him. It felt like summer had came and went in the blink of an eye.

He rubbed his arms as he glanced at the colorful shops he passed by. Maniquins posed in graceful or cool ways, their bodies showing off what he assumed was the latest fashions, and glittering lights doing their best to make all of it exciting. He'd need to go inside one of these soon for winter gear, but the thought of the cost made his stomach twist.

"Maybe I need a second job... Wait!"

His thoughts screeched to a halt when he saw it. A man with a gun in the reflection, his body hazy and just missable unless you were truly looking. Atsushi spun around, his gaze locked on the alley across from him.

Kneeling on the ground was a woman in a black coat. She appeared to be hunched over, almost curling into herself. The man in question stood over her, his gun in hand, a sneer on his face.

Without another thought Atsushi rushed across the street, cocked back an arm, and felt the delicious rush of adrenaline spark through his veins as skin connected with skin. The man was flung back, gun skittering under a toppled trash can.

Atsushi had hardly landed on his feet, before he hovered over the woman, hands up and palms exposed in a comforting gesture.

"You okay?"

"Y-yes. Thank you."

His eyes widened as the woman uncurled from the snail princess pose she had before. It wasn’t the dark skin or curly hair that made his heart thrum faster, but the odd accent that curled along her words.

A foreigner.

Great, he didn't understand a lick of English.

"Ahhhh...."

She smiled up at him, blood spilling from her split lip. "I understand Japanese pretty well, if that's your worry."

"That's a relief, I don’tthink I've actually tried to learn- Oh..."

He stopped when she stood up, the baby bump she had was obvious now, even with the fancy coat that hung around her like a dress on her figure. Her fingers, smeared in blood, cradled it gently.

"Y-you're bleeding!"

She blinked and ran a hand through her hair, pausing and hissing close to her ear. "It appears I am. G-great."

And as if he was at the center of a twisted fairytale, his princess proceeded to faint.

-----‐‐--------------------------------------------------------------

Of course a pretty girl would faint in front of him.

Of course she would be pregnant and bleeding.

Because of course Atsushi had the worst luck on the planet!

He hurried through the doors of the ADA'S office building, taking the stairs two at a time before he made it to the office door proper. He kicked it open, and for once he didn't wince under everyone's disapproving stares.

"Where's Dr. Yosano?"

"In her office." Kunikida said, half standing from his desk. "What’s the big entrance for? Are you okay? Wait- Kid!"

Atsushi hurried down the hall and knocked on the already ajar door. Yosano looked up from her computer, a small smile on her face.

"You're in a rush. Excited for a treatment?"

"I have someone else." He spun around. "Can you do, I don’t know, normal doctor stuff to her?"

He felt the weight shift off his back, and glanced behind him to see the doctor directing Kunikida to place her on one of the infirmary beds behind a petition.

"Wait outside, Atsushi."

"But Doctor-"

"Do you trust me?"

He stared at the woman for a long moment. Despite her violent tendencies and wild moods, never once did he feel in actual danger with her...

"I do."

She smiled and pointed to her desk. "You can sit there if you like. I'll be out soon."

----‐----------------------------------------------------------------

"Thirty minutes..."

Atsushi swore he counted every second while he sat in the chair, inhaling the scent of lavender tea that Kunikida had brought him a little bit after this torture began. He hadn't heard screaming, or power tools, or the heavy silence when you just know someone died. Just the quiet and gentle words from Yosano, and the ocassional mettalic clink of the trash can.

He shut his eyes, doing his best to ignore the flashes of stained glass, biting pain, and tall figures that haunted him all his life. No, this woman would make it and her baby would have a mother. Despite not believing in any gods or higher powers, Atsushi did believe that there was cruelty and kindness in the world. He wouldn't wish his stay in the orphanage on anyone, not even his worse enemy.

"Okay!"

Atsushi's eyes snapped open. "How is she?"

Yosano gestured to the door. "Why don't you see for yourself?"

He jumped up and hurried to the door, only to pause, nerves plaguing his insides, feeling every bit like ants crawling in his guts. "Um, may I come in?"

"Of course."

Tension fell off of him as he entered the infirmary, his lips pulling into a smile when he saw the bandaged, and alive, woman. "Glad you're doing okay. You scared me back there."

"Sorry, I've always been scared of blood. I wish I had time to warn you, but here we are."

He glanced down at her still obvious bump despite the nice blouse and skirt she wore. "And..."

"She's okay." She pressed her hand to the bump. "Trust me, we've been through worse than a fainting session."

"Yeah, just before that you had a gun to your head. Why was that?"

"I was shopping for cribs when he stopped me. He was asking for directions in English, but then he dragged me to the alley."

That made sense. Most everyone would just assume she's a foreigner, and one that could speak English on top of that. "Did you notice anything obvious about him?"

"Other than the gun?"

He felt his face warm. "R-right, that would be your biggest worry. Sorry."

"You're fine, you're fine." She smiled then, and he felt his face flush further. "Still, thank you for saving us. I owe you."

"N-no that's just what we do here! We help people and try to keep the city safe. Not like hero's or anything, I mean I was getting a bunch of weird stuff for Dazai-

"Someone say name?"

Atsushi moved out the way as Dazai came in, hands stuffed in his pockets and steps light. However, for the first time in his life, Atsushi saw Dazai's smile reach his eyes. It was uncanny, like seeing a Christmas ornament on White Day.

Dazai crossed his arms, head tilted. "Strange to see you here, Belladonna."

"I had a bit of a run in close to the docks." She gestured to Atsushi. "This one was my knight in shining armor. He's even handsome too!"

He suddenly found his shoes to be the most fascinating thing in the world as the other two chattered back and forth. Compliments from women was a Dazai thing. They somehow found his messy, often sleep deprived, and occasionally unwashed self to be handsome or interesting. Not a single woman had ever made a fuss out of Atsushi before, not when he was dressed up or when he was doing his job.

He had always just been Atsushi Nakajima.

A growl rang through the room, and all eyes turned to the woman. "Uh, Miss. Are you hungry?"

"You can call me Bella, Dazai does." She gave a lopsided grin. "And yes, I could go for some fresh rice and cucumber!"

"It is past lunch." Dazai noted after a quick peak at his phone. "We should let you get going."

"That's true. I need to get home anyway."

"Will you be okay alone?" Atsushi asked. "You won't faint again?"

"I shouldn't. If it makes you feel better I can text my husband. I can't promise he'll answer, he works the night shift."

"I can escort!"

All eyes were now on Atsushi, and he had to fight not to set his face on fire. "I-I mean, I didn't stop that guy. What if he's still patrolling the docks? Plus there's the Port Mafia too. They're just as scary."

She tilted her head. "I don't live near the docks? I'm actually close to the Mori Inc office-"

"Still their territory."

"I see."

His skin jumped when Dazai clapped a hand to his shoulder. "I think Atsushi wants to see this through. What do you say for a late afternoon stroll, Bella?"

"It won't be imposing on you right, Mr. Nakajima?"

"Atsushi! I-I mean, you can call me Atsushi. And no, it wouldn’t at all, I promise."

He felt his heart beat faster as she pushed herself out of the bed and went over to him. She was so close he could smell the soft scent of cocoa butter and something like red wine.

"You're sweet." She kissed his cheek, making him splutter. "Shall we?"

______________________________________________________

Watching Dazai speak to "Bella" was an... experience. Atsushi had always seen the man as almost cartoonishly demented, and a bit of a mad genius. However, as the other two walked ahead there was something else. He couldn't put a finger on it, but if he could he would call it dark as night.

Beep!

"Oh, he wants me to meet him at...." She groaned. "I can't read this."

Dazai peered down at the screen. "It's an Italian place. Fancy. Good to know some people never change."

Atsushi jogged to catch up to them. "Looks like you got lucky twice today."

She nodded, a small smile on her face. "I think you’re my lucky knight, Atsushi!"

Atsushi had to stop himself from clutching his chest. "She's gonna kill me!"

The three crossed the street, and Dazai pointed to a brick building with a prominent green and red sign next to a park. "That's it. Figures he'd pick something so obnoxious."

Atsushi worked on schooling the bubbling jealousy as they went to the building. The cars that were parked all seemed foreign made, and probably cost more than his own bounty. A glimpse in the window and he could see the wait staff wore tailored suits just like most of the people that dined there.

However, it was a flash of copper red that caught his attention, and he found himself moving to get in front of Bella.

"A-Atsushi? What's going on?"

"Dazai, you can get her across the street. I'll distract him."

"Well this is gonna be interesting."

Atsushi opened his mouth, ready to scold Dazai for the lackadaisical quip, when he felt cloth brush him and saw the woman hurry over to the man chain smoking while staring at his phone.

"I made it!"

Chuuya looked up sharply, and a crooked grin graced his lips as he was quick to extinguish his cigarette. "There's my favorite girl. Found a couple of strays, huh?"

Atsushi grabbed her wrist, jerking her to a stop mid step. He kept his gaze on Chuuya, he had put his phone away, his lips curled into a sneer. "Wait, do you know this man? He's dangerous."

"Atsushi, I appreciate you trying to help me, but this is the last person I need protection from." She turned to look up at him, and he knew the dissapointment on his face was apparent when her eyes narrowed. "I know this man enough to have a kid with him. So please let me go. You're hurting me."

Chuuya took a step forward, the glare deepening at her words, his voice darkening and growing fierce. "Kid I've killed for a hell of a lot less."

"Calm down, Chuuya."

Dazai blocked Atsushi's view of Chuuya as he bent down and easily slipped boney fingers between his hand and the woman's wrist. He could hear the click of her boots hurry across the side walk, before the soft crush of cloth against cloth. He didn't need to see them to know she was curled into the mafia executive.

"If anything you should be thanking him. Right, Atsushi?"

Dazai switched sides with a simple twist of his wrist nearly making Atsushi fall forward. "Uh... I-"

"Oh yeah! I fainted." Bella said, her fingers coming up to trace the bandages on her head. "At least it was an alley instead of a train car."

Chuuya's glare switched from Atsushi to his wife. "And you’re just telling me! What the hell happened?"

Atsushi was quick to explain, and he was almost shocked to see Chuuya hold his wife closer, long fingers splayed over her stomach. He always associated the Port Mafia with violence, but to see this man tenderly hold and soothe another person...

It reminded him that these were humans.

The Port Mafia members had their own families, and hobbies, and lives outside ruining his own in some way.

Did they remember he too was human?

"Sounds like more Australian organ harvesting doctors. Don’t be surprised when you get a call for them. They're infecting the city like a plague." Chuuya spat. "Still..."

He withdrew from his wife as he took a step forward, making Atsushi teeter backwards until he bumped into Dazai, and bowed low at the waist. "Thank you for saving my wife and child. I'm in your debt."

Atushi merely stared at him, his brain fizzing. "Um, I-"

"Wow Atushi! You got a favor from the Mafia, an executive even! That's almost as good as a silver orcale." Dazai exclaimed. "Hey, Belladonna. Next time you're in trouble you should call me. I'd be your knight anytime!"

As if he'd never even been in the position, Chuuya was standing properly with hands on his hips and glare on his face. "Hah? If she’s gonna run into trouble you would be that trouble!"

The two went back and forth a few more times before a pair of arms wrapped around Chuuya's middle, and once again jealousy bit at Atsushi as the mafioso's wife nipped his neck. "Baby I love you, but I am going to resort to cannibalism with you as my first target if I don't eat."

"Alright, alright. I hear ya." A gloved hand carefully extracted her from his person. "Look, I need to take care of my woman, but I'm a man that pays his debts. I owe you one favor. Just one. And just you, kid. Remember that."

Bella grinned and waved to him, before taking Chuuya's gloved hand in her own. Atsushi watched Chuuya lead her inside, all earlier animosity and aggression gone as he looked up at her, his eyes full of what he only just learned...

"I have to say, Atsushi. That's one hell of a first crush you picked for yourself."

"W-what! I don't- I mean she's married!"

"To a Port Mafia member too." Dazai's gaze cut from the restaurant to Atsushi. "You understand the reprecussions if the law knew, correct?"

"They would send her back to her country, right?"

"Not even that. They would send her to prison. I think you’re smart enough to figure out the rest."

"Dazai?"

"Hm?"

The wind blew around them, kicking up fall's final leaves and sending them up and away. "I won't tell."

Dazai smiled, the one that didn't reach his eyes. The one he did for pretty girls at bars, all his coworkers, and to his own reflection when he thought no one noticed.

"Good."

Dazai began walking to the crosswalk, his hands deep in his pockets, looking more like a scarecrow than a human. Atsushi followed after him, waiting for the light to turn green.

"How did you meet, anyway?"

"Curiosity killed the cat."

"Dazai, I'm serious!"

"Hmm...Well, once upon a time...."

END

[miikishii]

To Hold the Sea | Ch.1

main masterlist

series masterpost | next chapter

synopsis: Life continues on, you can't run from the past forever.

Warnings: mentions of drinking and being drunk, a little angsty :(

The alarm you wake up to is snoozed almost as fast as you hear it. The warmth on the other side of the bed stirs just a bit, why did you ever trust Dazai with your alarms again? You roll over, wishing you had the energy to move your hand toward him, let alone give him a shove. 

“‘Zai, that’s the third time now, we have to go,” you mumble.

Your mouth feels like it’s glued together with sleep, it’s surprising you managed to get those words out. You sit up and check your phone to wake yourself up even a little bit more. When you’ve finally mustered the strength to get up from the bed, Dazai is snoozing his fourth alarm.

You don’t even care at this point. It’s a regular thing with him. He doesn’t get much sleep at night, you can hardly blame him. When he shows up to the office 20 minutes late, you realize he only woke up 10 minutes before he walked in the door. 

He walks to his desk rubbing the sleep from his eyes, turning the brightness of his computer as high as it goes. You know by the time you look up he’ll’ve fallen back asleep anyway. Mornings are slow. The only person who minds is Kunikida who briefly looks across at Dazai before cursing to himself about staying focused. You walk down the hallway to your little office and sit down, staring at yourself in the reflection of the computer. ‘Things have been the same lately’ you tell yourself. In truth, they haven’t been, and you know this, you just don’t want to admit it. The worst part is that you feel you’re the only one who’s changed. Dazai still barges into your apartment the same way he did 6 years ago, insisting he’s just bored. When he stares out your balcony longingly you know that boredom is only half of it. 

The memory takes you back to places you wish you could forget.

When Kunikida enters your office, you halfheartedly nod at whatever he’s saying. He doesn’t miss the dejected look in your eyes, you’re brought back to reality when he closes the door.

“You’re the agency’s psychiatrist, I’m surprised to see you so… emotionally distracted.”

You perk up at the mention of your title. It feels like a joke, always has. 

“I’m not surprised you noticed, but why mention it, isn’t it distracting you from your work?” You almost laugh.

“I blocked out 7 minutes to talk to you about it.” He says matter-of-factly. 

“Everything’s just been hard to deal with recently, that’s all. I know how valuable your time is, you don’t have to worry about it.”

“It’s not about my time, it’s about my colleagues’ health. Talk to someone besides me on your own time but, while we’re here, I’m considering it my problem.”

You sigh, pushing your chair a little farther from your desk,

“It’s all just feelings from the past. Working with Sakaguchi has been tough for me.”

Kunikida looks down for a moment, he looks both disappointed and understanding. 

“I don’t know what happened to you back then, but we’re all here if you need us.”

You wondered if he felt weird about you after learning where you and Dazai came from. If anything, you’d always assumed he’d never find out, but, once you realized he would, you just hoped he wouldn’t hate you.

“The you I know is not a bad person, remember that.” With that, he takes his leave, 2 minutes early. Your day is quiet after that. Nothing out of the ordinary, no one checking up to see how you’re doing, just paperwork and idle chatter. Your commute home is quiet. Your apartment is quiet too. When you look at the space on your bed Dazai didn’t tidy up you want to cry. Somehow, that empty space has the same presence he’s had these days. Since the agency started to do some work with Ango’s help, you’ve both felt the emotions you suffered through resurging. Your history is something only Dazai knows any details about. The smell of liquor fills your senses.

The night you met Ango he kept to himself, but something about him excited you. The way he argued so intently with the others, the way his glasses rolled down his face, the way his hair was always slicked back in a way only he could pull off. 

The next few times you went to Lupin you got to know him better, and he was everything you’d imagined. An intelligent, responsible man who was all too happy to listen to you talk about your day. At some point, you’d forgotten how much you were drinking and as you said your goodbyes, he insisted on making sure you went home safe. The next time you got drunk, you insisted on coming home with him. You became accustomed to the cushions and pillows on his couch, drunk or sober. And every time you stayed, he made sure you felt at home.

On weekend mornings, breakfast sat on the coffee table in front of you, and soon they wafted towards you lying twisted in his sheets. The mornings when the sun gently shook you both awake swelled you with a love you’d never found in anything else. You only wished you could feel it now.

Laying alone in your apartment is something you avoid; it always ends like this. Sometimes when you see him you consider asking him to stay with you. Sometimes you hope he does the same.

note: yayyy!! first chapter is out!! I'm so excited!! I've been working on this for the past month or so, please let me know what you think, I love love love hearing what you guys have to say!

[knockyasocksoff2022]

Ideal No. 14

(3,541 words)

(Thank you so much to @fyodorsushankaaa and rikarikachrzan on Wattpad for getting me to update)

I hear Kunikida before I see him. His footsteps are heavier than usual today, and I hear him sipping something that smells like tea from a thermos as he comes in. I can't make myself look at him, but I don't need to know he's tired. Of course, he is. We worked until nearly 22:30 last night, and have been doing so for more than a month now.

I don't know why he stays. I'm not making him, and he's never been one to be petty (he is stubborn though, and I'd like to imagine he stays to look out for me, however moronic that may be.) It's against his Ideals to work so late, as he has mentioned many times before when criminals have kept us chasing them into the late hours. And yet, no matter what he claims, he is a man of duty (a man chained to duty), and no matter how late the call, he answers. I think perhaps, for the sake of his health, I will leave at a normal time today.

The thought of my antics affecting Kunikida's health even as I try my best to change fills me with guilt and shame that makes my stomach simmer. But I always greet him, and I cannot say nothing today, especially when Kunikida has been working so hard.

Looking up as if I just noticed him I greet him.

He pauses mid-motion, mug hovering over his desk, a confused look on his face. It occurrs to me belatedly that I used the wrong honorific for him. I have never called him 'san' in all the time I've known him, but today it reflects the guilt I feel. I have failed my duty as a colleague. I suppose manners are the least I could do after my failure with the bonito, even if he doesn't know it (or my sleepless nights are finally catching up to me.)

He unfreezes, setting his thermos on his desk, concern still on his face. "Yes, unpleasant indeed. Good morning to you as well, Dazai-kun. And, if I may ask, are you feeling alright?"

It's my turn to freeze. He noticed? I swear I made it impossible to tell, washed my face, and applied makeup (stolen from Yosano) to my eyebags. No one in the mafia was ever able to tell. But as always, I underestimated him and his goodness, or his pity. Curse him for being so observant. If this were before, I would simply snitch his glasses, but I could hardly do that now.

I put on my cheeriest voice and reassure him. It seems to satisfy him.

-

All through the morning he glances at me. He looks worried I'll go off like some bomb, maybe really kill myself and cause a mess for the agency, for him, to clean up.

I try to ignore it, the way I ignore the pain with each tap of my hand against the keyboard.

What a hassle.

(A/N: Nagi, is that you?)

-

"Come have lunch with me."

I drop my pen, startled by the voice. The clock reads 11:59 and Kunikida Doppo stands in front of my desk. 

Is that the real Kunikida? And he's . . . asking me out?

I mentally slap myself for the train of thought. Of course not. He must have a case he wants to discuss. I relax my face as best I can, a grin now would do me no good. I shouldn't give him any further reason to suspect my feelings. But I feel my lips twitching despite the effort, my brain still high on the shot of hope. More powerful than any narcotic.

I think back on the words for a second. Kunikida's tone was firm, but kind as usual (it's only recently I've been receiving the kinder end of that spectrum), and his eyes, they look . . . desperate (but that can't be right)?

Did he notice my deep fatigue the way I noticed his? He mentioned it earlier. Yes, that's all this is. I can calm myself. He's just being polite

"Kunikida-kun?" I question. Has he been hit over the head (at least maybe then he would love me, though again, that's a selfish thought)? I know my confusion must come across as patronising, but it's better that way, better if I drive him away. I can't take any more of his shallow niceties. He steps back (pity, I was admiring his eyes). 

I'm about to remind him I have my own lunch when I remember my lunch was supposed to be the fish that wound up on the floor. He speaks before I can feed him my lie.

His expression is frazzled for a second, like a computer on the fritz (he's probably taken time to think and realised how little he actually likes the idea of eating with me. An easy out for me. I can pretend it's painless.) "I don't mean to overstep, I merely meant that I noticed you forgot your lunch today, and if you like, I can buy you something. We, of course, would not eat together. That would be highly unnecessary." he assures me with an emphatic shake of his head. 

Of course not.

He thinks he's reassuring me. I want to puke.

My heart sinks. I didn't think it was possible for it to slip any lower, any deeper into my chest, for it to feel any colder. I keep my face  polite and neutral, matching his. Like him, I put on shallow niceties, pressing my fingers together, letting the pain ground me.

"Thank you, Kunikida-kun. That's very nice of you, but I couldn't make you spend your money on me." The words are ridiculous. How many times have I taken advantage of his wallet, even when I have my own funds?

How stupid I must seem to you. Now that he's finally asking me to lunch I say no, but I didn't want it to be like this. I always thought that I'd take him up, no matter how he wanted it to be genuine

"No. It's no trouble. It would be my treat."

That makes no sense, he loves working. What is he saying? Does he have a fever? Why is he being so insistent? It almost sounds like he- No. No, don't even dare to get your hopes up Dazai Osamu.

"A colleague helping out a colleague, nothing more." 

Because just like that he sends them crashing back down again. 

I feel heavy, by making myself nod, always respectful. I know I won't be able to handle eating with him, and I shouldn't make him go out of his way for me. Ah, how dare he feed my fantasies with things like this? "Well, in that case. Thank you, Kunikida-kun. You're such a kind colleague, but there's no need for you to go anywhere with me. I'll order something and go get it myself."

Kunikida pauses, considering my offer then, I can't fathom why, but he narrows his eyes with doubt and suspicion, the way he used to when I'd swear I hadn't eaten mushrooms. I can't describe the relief the expression brings. I'd give anything to see it now, give anything for him to scold and slap me after these weeks of nothing, nothing, and more nothing.

(A/N: AyO!) 

"True, but we've both been in the office so much lately. I could use a change of pace. Couldn't you? We haven't been to that tea house in a while, the one we took Atsushi to that day. It's an efficiently drivable distance and has economical prices."

What? How dare he? How dare he do this? There's no way he knows, still, how can he be so casually cruel?

I can't look at him, it hurts. My whole body hurts. It almost numbs out the pain of my hand. But I've got to say something.

I glance across the room to where our juniors sit, piled around Atsushi's desk. Perfect! I can't be alone with Kunikida, my heart couldn't take it, but this should be perfectly fine if it's a group outing, then maybe I'll be able to stop imagining that it's a date.

"Hmm, excellent idea, Kunikida-kun. I am finished with my morning work so we can make it an outing. Let's bring Atsushi-kun."

Kunikida turns, following my gaze to Atsushi. I focus on his hair, he's easier to look at from the back, just those well-built shoulders, not his piercing grey eyes tearing apart my soul.

Shaking my head I start to get Atsushi's attention, but Kunikida turns around before I can, his eyes on me again, making the words die in my mouth.

"He seems busy. We shouldn't bother him. "

The words are so sudden that I'm not sure what to say. Atsushi doesn't look busy at all, and he loves food almost as much as Kenji. Does he have a case I'm unaware of? What's going on? Is Kunikida planning another intervention? Is that why he wants me alone? But usually, he gets the whole agency together for those. And I've made myself look fine. Does he suspect? What should I do?

Ah, he's staring again. I shouldn't make him question me further.

" . . . Ah, right."

Seemingly satisfied with my answer he turns and begins to walk purposefully towards the door, with his usually timely pace. This is only a mission for him. Charity work. Make sure the poor sod doesn't starve.

And now I have no choice but to face him alone. And of course, I'm in far too deep not to go.

As we pass the coat stand I think about the weather outside. The clouds signal inevitable rain. I should take it, but the thought of putting it on with my injured hand isn't appealing. Getting dressed this morning was hard enough and it didn't hurt half as much then. I think I can feel it seeping something so I shove the thought away and keep walking.

Kunikida turns back as my foot hits the first stair. He looks me up and down, then out the window and back at me again.

"Don't you need your coat?" 

I'm caught. What can I say that won't reveal my disgusting failure of an injury? For once, I thank Mori. At least that man taught me how to lie.

Acting is my speciality. I do it nearly all day now. This will be a breeze.

"Oh. Well, you're driving, so we'll be inside most of the time. Do you not have an umbrella?" The question is innocent, dripping with manipulation. Can he sense it, I wonder? Does he have any idea of how deeply he's being deceived?

But unlike for some, the thought doesn't bring me giddy, it just brings guilt, guilt, and shame. I can't look at him again. I watch the reflection in his glasses, just close enough to his eyes to fool him.

Maybe he does notice because I'd swear he hesitates, but, of course, I'm wrong. Kunikida Doppo never hesitates.

"No, of course. I suppose it's fine then."

-

The wind is bitter when we leave the safety of the office, but Kunikida's car is warm, the beige interior comforting instead of boring as I used to say.

-

The tea house is exactly as I remember it. My, how much has changed since then.

Kunikida retrieves the promised umbrella from the side door, opens his door, and puts it up. It strikes me just how small it is. Of course, it is, he's a single man who prides himself on efficiency in all areas of life, including space, and with no time for romance, why would he have a larger umbrella?

The gentlemanly thing to do would be to let him have it to himself, but the cold is already seeping into my bones, despite the car still running, and I'm too selfish. Like some sort of stalker striving for any chance to be close to him. What a creep!

He looks between the car and the restaurant as if mirroring my thoughts, but eventually turns the key, shutting the engine and plunging me into the cold.

I nearly pass out when I see him crossing to my side of the car, (or maybe that's just the pain). He should make me walk. I blink when he opens my door. The umbrella looks even smaller from here and I hate the way it makes my heart pound (or maybe that's just my head). But I can't just stand here looking stupid, so with a breath, I get up and join him.

I'm sure anyone watching us would laugh at the miserable sight. One of our shoulders each is getting soaked. How selfish can I be when Kunikida is already looking run down? What kind of person would I be if I let him catch a chill?

I try to move farther, but it's awkward. My hand aches from being pressed so close to my side and the pain travels like flames liking up my arm.

As we near the entrance a horrible thought occurs to me. The door. I won't be able to open it at the recessed angle with my dominant hand so tightly bandaged. The thought shouldn't be so devastating and yet, it is. I can't help it. That was one of the small ways in which I could redeem myself, and now . . . nothing.

I fall back, feeling the rain on my neck, and let him lead. I don't deserve to be near him. Maybe if he's in front he'll just open it himself. How awful.

But, of course not, he expects it, as he should.

We stand there in agony for a second. Me, literally and him, I'm not sure, but the awkwardness must kill him too on some level. That doesn't make me feel any better.

With a stiff grin, he opens the door, huffing in annoyance.

The shop is even warmer than the car, the lights are warm and homely, but the waitress gives me a wary look as I enter. I can't stand it, so I look down, trailing Kunikida like some sad lost child.

When we reach the counter, Kunikida trunks to me. I force my heavy head up to look at him. His wallet is out, a nice leather thing. 

"What would you like?" His voice is stiff too, and he's not quite looking at me either. I can tell because he isn't as good at it as me. I don't complain. I deserve it and it's the only way facing him is bearable.

I can see the umbrella sharing made him uncomfortable too. Selfish, Is should've just brought my coat like a normal person. Now he's all wet.

I can't take it . . . so I do what I always do, make everything a joke, like some miserable jester. "Oh, surprise me."

It comes out flirtatious because of course, it does. How could it not when my heart pounds at the sight of him? Still, it was unprofessional. I hope the waitress doesn't think we're together. She'll probably gossip about seeing someone like me with someone like Kunikida. I turn before I can see his reaction, running away as usual. I pick the booth farthest from the counter.

The table is solid, a nice contrast when I feel separate from my physical body. At least this table is never confused about what plane it's on. I lean my weight into it. Even though the air-con unit is blowing hot air, I shiver.

A waitress comes to the table with two cups of hot green tea. She has the kind of smile that reminds me of a mother. Not my mother, of course, but how a mother should be.

"You and your boyfriend, enjoy now."

My heart nearly stops. My chest feels tight. Despite the air I can feel in my lungs it feels like I've stopped breathing. I sputter. " . . . W-we will."

I take a sip of the tea as she leaves, struggling to lift it in my non-dominant hand. It nearly spills so I put it down after a singular burning sip.

Just as I put it down, Kunikida comes back.

He sits down without a word. He can't even bear to talk to me.

I force myself to sip my tea, just for something to do. He does the same. It's like our conversation lately but without words.

Suddenly he puts his tea down. 

"Dazai-san,"

Oh. When he says my full name like that. Oh. It takes all the pain away.

"I'm sorry to have forced you to come here, I shouldn't have. This is unprofessional. I'll drive us back as soon as the food arrives. Let me go and see if they'll put in takeaway boxes."

Leaving? Already? Has he had enough of me so quickly, after he insisted? The idea sucks the air from my chest.

"What?" The word slips out. I didn't mean it, but I can't take it back.

"You look extremely uncomfortable." He explains.

Oh no. Has he realised? But I don't want to leave. I can't not yet, I need just a little more. Please.

"Oh, no. I'm just cold. You're right I should have brought my coat. I forgot because we haven't been here in so long. It's sooo nice to be back, isn't it? It feels like only yesterday we bought our little were-tiger all that chazuke, no? Oh, Ku~ni~ki~da~ don't you miss the olden days, everything was so much easier back then. " The clownery hurts but the thought of losing precious time with Kunikida is worse.

I can see he isn't fooled. How could I? He's always seen through my bullshit, some of it, at least.

"Dazai, what is it?" He's worried. Like I'm someone he has to look after. He'll never see me as an equal.

So I give him what he expects. My 'usual' clownish façade.

"What is what? Has Kunikida finally gone mad from all the stress?"

He frowns, a huff slipping from his lips despite his efforts to remain calm. It's sort of hot in a weird way.

"The game is up, Dazai Osamu, be serious with me. I'll know if you aren't. What is going on?" He's leaning across the table, commanding me. As attractive as that would be, he's not stupid. I know he's getting close to the chink in my armor, and I can't let that happen.

I'm going to have to gaslight him, like the horrid wreck of a man I am. 

"Nothing, Kunikida-kun, you're being paranoid." Because That's what I always do, insult people and drive them away.

"Do not insult me." But he doesn't sound as angry as someone in his position should be. I can't figure it out. He leans closer, still.

What to say? What to say? Between the sleep deprivation, the pain and his close proximity my thoughts blur. "I- You are the one who coerced me into lunch, Kunikida-kun." I regret it as soon as the words are out. Suggesting that he'd asked me out, despite how his request sounded, would only offend him further, pushing him away from me. And I can see that he doesn't want to be here anyway. Maybe I should just get up and leave. (My head's so light I don't know if I can).

"I am sorry, we can leave when you tell me what's wrong with you." His voice breaks. He means it. How dare he? How dare he be so concerned only as a colleague? Why does it have to be pity? Why can't his concern mean something more? I hate being delusional.

And now I have no choice but to go back to being a clown.

"What's wrong with me? Why that's quite a long list you see. It all started when I was a very young boy of only six and-"

He cuts me off. I'm almost relieved. "Stop joking around!"

The words slip out like water out of a frozen and thawed pipe, uncontrollable, but expected. So deep in the lie that they don't feel like mine. "What's wrong with you, Kunikida-kun?"

He looks hurt, wounded, caught. I hate myself. But, ever calm, collected, perfect, he fixes his expression quickly.

"What's wrong with me? Nothing! I am fine. It's you that's–

But he's not in control anymore. He's upset, a feeling I tend to bring out in people. His arm flails for emphasis, knocking my tea cup. The hot tea seeps through my bandages, burning my hand once more. 

Kunikida gasps.

I don't want to look. I can't look. I know I have to look.

My hand is soaked in red, the crimson shade of self-loathing.

When I look up, I wish I didn't. His expression sends a wave of ice through my veins. It's a look I've only seen once before . . . when I almost succeeded in my life's mission.

It was a year ago. Some girl I made myself fancy ended her life and I thought I ought to follow her, just to get rid of the feeling of wanting but not being wanted back.

I caused such a mess that he searched all over the city until he found me in an abandoned mafia-safe house. It was a miracle the hospital had the antidote to what I bought off this thug, honestly. I'm not even sure what I took, but it must've been one of the few poisons I haven't built up resistance to.

When he carried me in his arms like that, that was it, I think, the moment I really fell in love with him. How tragic.

Outside my mind, it feels like time has slowed. Kunikida lunges across the table, grabbing my hand faster than I can pull the sluggish limb away

What now?

IDEALS [kunikidazai]

(A/N: I've been palying around with ship names for these two and came up with Ideal Human because together these two make one perfectly functioning person. Kind of like how Tachizaki is Midwinter Snow because if their abilities)

SUMMARY:

Dazai Osamu is the farthest possible thing from the ideal woman Kunikida Doppo has written so much about in his notebook.

And yet . . . Kunikida is hoplessly in love with him anyway. Kunikida doesn't belive he has a chance with his coworker, I mean, have you seen the way he flirts with women? Straight as the rulers Kunikida used to use in his maths class.

Dazai meanwhile is also inlove with uptight but still charming coworker. But how can Dazai ever come close to the woman Kunikida has in mind?

Will these two damn idiots figure their shit out or not? God, I hope they do, for all our sanity!

(Summary sponsered by Edogawa Ranpo)

Categories: angst, fluff, getting together

Warnings: N/A

Thank you to @wildroseroguefor inspiring me to write Kunikidazai for the first time. Rose has lots of Kunikida content on her blog, check it out.

[ethereal-blossom]

req for Dazai (and Chuuya too, if u dont mind💜) accidentally scaring their s/o (how u wanna do this is up to u. it can be in an argument, sustaining an injury after a battle) in like, an angsty way pls? ty hehe xx 🍒

a/n: dudeee i have been so excited for this request! i hope this was enough angst🙈 hope you enjoy, mon cherie!

warning: cursing

dazai word count: 1k+ whoops?

chuuya word count: 804

"hm, are you sure it's going to work?" you asked your significant other.

dazai let out a soft chuckle in response. "when did one of my plans ever fail?" he had your there. still, you couldn't help but feel a nervous feeling in your stomach. dazai had been more distant lately. you tried looking into his warm eyes, but instead you met an emotional wall.

you gathered the courage to ask further. nevertheless, kunikda was ahead of you. "let's go, dazai. it's your fault that we're already behind schedule."

dazai planted a kiss on your hand as goodbye. he followed kunikda exiting the room. the fact that your significant other didn't say any words to you as goodbye left a bitter taste in your mouth. what was dazai up to?

_ 

your fingers slid across the keys of your keyboard. the report you had been working on was taking forever. however, it was the only thing that helped you getting distracted from dazai. although, your heart couldn't help but skip a beat every time a door opened, or if a phone rang.

someone stood before your desk. “is something wrong, y/n?” 

you stopped typing and looked up to atsushi. you answered: "i don't really know. do you mind if i- it's dazai. did you notice something peculiar about dazai lately?"

“yes, now you say so. he has been more distant, but i figured it was because of the mission kunikida and he are working on. did something happen between the two of you?” 

“oh no, no it isn’t that. i’m just a bit concerned about dazai, that’s all. dazai is not reckless, but he-” 

“he does whatever needs to be done to get the results,” atsushi finished your sentence.

“yes, exactly.” 

there's one important rule that everybody must follow: you do not talk about the devil when your back is turned.

the president walked out of his office and he looked at you and atsushi. the words that rolled over his lips were the cause of your rapid heartbeat. dazai had gotten stuck in the line of fire and he got hit by a bullet. the risk of bringing him to the armed detective agency had been too big. kunikida had to take him to the hospital. 

“mister president, could i please get permission to visit dazai?” 

only a simple nod was needed for you to run out of the building, followed by atsushi. 

_ 

your significant other was sitting on a hospital bed with his legged crossed. an easeful smile rested on his face when you entered the room. kunikida sat on the chair beside his partner. he looked up from his notebook and said: “good, you made it here with the brat. as you can see, the bullet didn’t cause too much damage.” 

dazai pouted in response. “that doesn’t mean the pain is any less. make it stop, kunikida-kunnn.” 

“then you shouldn’t have been that dumb to tease an armed man!” 

“and lose the opportunity to find out their hiding base?"

you clenched your fists. this is what you meant. this is exactly what you had meant. “kunikida and atsushi, could i please be alone with dazai for a few minutes?” 

the two men shared a look and obediently left the room. the smile on dazai’s face vanished. “i know you’re mad at me.” 

“of course i am! don’t you think for a second that i didn’t realize how you purposely got shot. what were you thinking dazai?” 

“it wasn’t directly my plan to get shot. however, i knew it was a possibility.” 

“and you decided to close me out. you decided to let me in the dark. do you know how worried i have been? did you even care?” 

“of course i know, y/n. and of course i care. i know you. and i knew you would have stopped me if you got the chance.” 

your eyes burned like flames while pressing your lips on each other tightly.

dazai said your name, but you looked away and folded your arms before your chest. 

it didn’t stop dazai from calling out your name again. this time, he reached out to you with his healthy arm. and this time you stepped back. 

your significant other clenched his jaw while he felt like something was choking his heart. he had never seen you this hurt or angry. “y/n, i know you are mad, but closing yourself off from me isn’t going to benefit the situation.”

you turned around so dazai wouldn’t see the silent tears rolling over your cheeks. “i’m mad because i’m hurt. and i’m hurt because you got hurt.” 

dazai’s eyes widened and he felt his jaw dropping. he was relieved that you couldn’t see the shock on his face. it was a vulnerability dazai seldom showed. but it would be worth it, because you were worth everything. 

he stood up and took a step into your direction. however, you had already heard him move. ”sit down, idiot,” you said and gently pushed him back on bed. “i just said i was hurt because you were hurt and then you’re going to do something that hurt you more? do you enjoy seeing me hurt, dazai?” 

dazai couldn’t help the small smile from making an appearance on his face. “no, but i enjoy your warmth, your love. y/n, i apologize for my behavior- i’m still getting used to having someone in my life who is worth living for. but i figured out something very important. come closer,” dazai said and waved at you. 

you came closer. the information that he had collected had to be worth it.

dazai whispered in your ear. “i’m an idiot who is hopelessly in love with you.” 

a laugh was trying to come to the surface. however, you decided to tease the man who had scared you. “you think i forgive that easily?” 

dazai pouted. “i’m sorry, deeply sorry. what can i do to make it up to you?” he rested his hand on your cheek. dazai lifted one corner of his mouth up and looked up right into your eyes. 

“i heard a kiss can make the pain go away.” 

“then i need to kiss you a lot.” and with that, dazai brought your face closer to his and tenderly brushed his lips against yours. 

chuuya. 

he was the first person you thought of when you heard a door open. the clock had already struck midnight, but that didn’t say anything. chuuya had been working overtime for the last couple of days. it was the reason why the spot next to you on the bed was empty. 

should you stay awake to see chuuya or  should you fall back to sleep again? you decided to go for the second option after you heard whispering. if chuuya was on the phone with work it was useless to stay up. all those thoughts faded when you realized something: that wasn’t your significant other’s voice. 

even your heart seemed to stop beating to hear the voices better. you could recognize at least three different voices. and like that your heartbeat started to speed up. chuuya. where was chuuya? where was your phone? wait- was the door of the bedroom locked? 

this was one of the best secured penthouses in yokohama. did those men know you were there? okay y/n, move. even if it feels like your blood turned into ice- for the love of god, move. you tiptoed your way towards the door and locked it. the sound felt awfully loud in the midst of the silent night. the voices stopped.  immediately you ran to the bathroom that was connected with the bedroom. you locked yourself up and called your chuuya. 

 voicemail. voicemail. voicemail .voicemail. voicemail. 

“why is this door locked?” a deep voice asked. 

“do you think he has a partner or anything?” you were doomed. 

“well, that port mafia scum is obviously busy. unless this is a room he really wants to keep hidden, somebody must be home.” so doomed. 

voicemail. voicemail. voicemail. voice-

“babe? what’s going on? i’m a little bit busy.” 

oh, how you could cry hearing your significant other’s voice. in your softest voice you explained what was going on. curse words came from the other line at the same time a loud crack was heard. the voices sounded closer, a lot closer. 

“y/n, stay on the line. shit, i’m on my way.” by the sound of the wind and the sound of crushing objects you could tell chuuya wasn’t moving like any other ordinary person. maybe you would have thought that the image of a red glowing man in the night sky looked beautiful, but not now. 

the sound of a knock filled your ears. “well, look at that. the door is locked.” the man chuckled. “you want to hear my theory? i think the scums little lover is hidden in the bathroom, absolutely defenseless. don’t you agree with me, kitten?” 

you could hear chuuya’s growl in your ear. his voice went over in a high pitched sound. 

please, you thought, tell me please that i’m not imagining hearing chuuya’s voice outside- 

the door opened, but before anything could happen it was followed by crushing glass. the men covered their heads with their hands. they didn’t realize they would stare into the eyes of their biggest fear if they would look up. 

chuuya stood in the bedroom surrounded by a red glow.  a shiver went down your spine. never ever had you seen your significant other so pissed. that aura of his was so- powerful. 

one of chuuya’s eyes shone brightly red and his head was tilted. his first instinct was to see if you were unharmed. after he assured that you were physical okay he made sure that the men who had dared to break into his penthouse would see black. chuuya was painting heavily when he knocked them all out; not from effort, but the fear of losing you, seeing you in pain. 

the port mafia member rushed towards the bathroom. there he saw you sitting on the floor with your head hidden between your knees. “y/n, shit. are you okay?” chuuya knelt down before you and he put his hands on your shoulders. 

a deep sigh left your lips, followed by his name. 

“i’m here. you don’t have to be scared anymore. i’m here.” 

still you didn’t move. a sudden thought struck chuuya. this was the first time you saw him using his ability like that- “y/n? are you- are you scared of me?” 

chuuya’s voice got your attention. it was much higher than usual and- had he been clenching his teeth? you finally lifted your head to look your significant other in the eyes which seemed to hide tears. “no. i mean, i was a little bit scared seeing you in action. but-” words couldn’t explain how much you loved this man. so, you fell into his arms and kissed him.  

chuuya sighed in relieve. 

“just pick up the damn phone a little bit sooner, will you?” you half seriously joked. 

chuuya chuckled and hugged you a little bit tighter. he would. 

[sirenascales]

-> double black [part three] 18+

-> Chuuya x 1stPOV!F!Reader x Dazai

-> Who knew getting fired from work could lead to this?

-> Content: SMUT, slight angst, violence, murder, swearing

A man is murdered and things get interesting as the investigation starts. [Chuuya x 1stPOV!F!Reader x Dazai]

2,981 words

note: no smut in this one hehe, but things are gonna get fun. enjoy!

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Final || masterlist

"Hey... are you okay?" Kenji asked me a few days later, noticing the scowl on my face and realizing that I had been tapping my nail on my desk repeatedly for the last fifteen minutes. "You seem... pissed?"

I grunted, closing my eyes and slowly taking a deep breath. "I'm okay, Kenji. Just having a bad day." The others shared looks with each other, but chose not to pry. The frown on my face never left, my fists clenched as my blood continued to boil.

Then that all went away, when I felt a gentle hand against the back of my neck. I looked over at Dazai, who had lazily rolled himself in his chair over to me. He grinned. "I could see the steam coming from your ears!"

His hand never left my neck, moving until his fingers loosely wrapped around the column of my throat. Strangely enough, my anger had completely gone away when he touched me, and it felt nice to finally breathe. "With the day I'm having..." I sighed, the whole world seemingly melting away, Dazai's thumb stroking along my jaw.

Kunikida was clearly unimpressed, the man gritting his teeth. Atsushi looked shocked, his face tinged red while Ranpo and Kenji just touched their own necks gently.

"Does she like to get choked?"

"Who knows, man."

"Hey, I know what will make you feel better," Dazai suggested and I tilted my head, waiting for him to continue. He leaned in and would have kissed me if it weren't for a book smacking right into the side of Dazai's head.

"Do that on your own time! We have a schedule!" Kunikida fumed while I quickly turned around to cover my face, simply to muffle down my obnoxious laughter.

"Oh, dude!"

"Kunikida! What was that for!"

"Public indecency!"

Dazai rubbed his head, whining from the pain while I just giggled behind my hands. Dazai almost looked betrayed at me laughing at him and I just shrugged my shoulders. "Hey, that's what you get for trying to play grab ass."

I purposely ignored Dazai's pouty face for the rest of the day, the man clearly upset that he didn't get to kiss me. I shook my head, glaring at him from across the office while threateningly pointing my pen at him.

"Work, dammit."

"I don't wanna! Bella, don't be so mean!"

I fixed him another glare before going back to my work, finishing up the final report for the last case we were on. After going through and making sure it was perfect, I saved and emailed it to the President, just as the door to the office slammed opened.

"He's gone!"

"Keiko?! What the he- Keiko, what's wrong?"

I stood up from my desk, my best friend standing before me in a frazzled state. She looked extremely distressed, tears falling down her face. I rushed to her, the woman collapsing into my arms as we both fell to our knees.

"He's gone!" she exclaimed before she started to sob into my chest. "He's gone! He's gone! He's gone!"

"Keiko..." I looked up at the others with wide eyes, them looking on with alarm. I turned back to Keiko, rubbing on her back as she continued to sob.

Taichi was killed. He was found in an alleyway with multiple stab wounds. Keiko had received a call from the police after his identity was discovered, the detectives revealing the tragic news to her.

"I'm so sorry, Keiko..." I said to her softly, sitting with her in one of the small areas of the office, separated by simple dividers. "... how the hell did this happen? We just saw him last night when he dropped you off at my place..."

Keiko had finished crying, but the terrible sadness in her eyes was a clear indication of how devastated she was. I clenched my fists, feeling my anger from earlier building up again.

"I'm going to have to make my statement," Keiko said softly, chewing on her bottom lip.

"Do you want me to go with you to the station?" I asked and she shook her head.

"No... it's okay..."

"The thing is, you are also one of the last people to see him alive," Kunikida spoke up, standing by with Dazai and Atsushi. "You'll have to give your account too..."

Sighing deeply, I absentmindedly reached under my skirt, pausing when I didn't feel my knife against my thigh where it usually was. I gritted my teeth, shaking my head to myself before I went back to rubbing on Keiko's back in an attempt to comfort her.

Soon, Keiko and I left the Agency and headed on over to the police station. We gave our accounts of the night before when we last saw Taichi, us talking separately with a different agent.

"Now you know, Mr. Kamiya was in the Port Mafia," the agent said and I nodded. "And they have quite a bit of history with your little organization."

I didn't like the condescending tone in his voice, but I kept my cool. "Of course, but none of us have anything to do with this man's murder, and you have no evidence proving otherwise."

He just rolled his eyes at me. "Well, this is all we need. You're free to go."

I nodded before quietly making my way out of the interview room. I met with Keiko, who looked like she had been crying again and I pulled her into a comforting hug. "It's okay. This will be over soon."

Later on, I found myself back at the Agency, Keiko choosing to go home, despite my protests. My head was buried in my arms, not moving as I felt someone put their hand on my head, lightly scratching my scalp.

"Looks like the police will keep on investigating Taichi's murder," Dazai said and I peeked one eye out to find him leaning against my desk. "Thing is, I'm sure the Port Mafia will also be conducting their own investigation. Ohh, this is gonna get interesting~"

"So is it better if we stay out of this, then?" I asked, sitting up in my chair. "I mean, unless we're asked... we don't have to touch this."

Dazai regarded me for a moment, a mysterious smile growing on his face before he just threw his hands up nonchalantly. "I get it, you were friends with the guy."

"Not really," I corrected him immediately. "Keiko is my friend."

"Ohhhhh," Dazai just hummed, tapping his forefinger on his chin. "Well anywho, the police are gonna have their hands full if the Port Mafia really gets involved! It wouldn't hurt to help, right?"

I hesitated, a small smile soon growing on my face as I nodded. "Sure. Let's start tomorrow."

"How about tonight instead?!" Dazai asked with a cheerful smile while I just glared at him angrily, the two of us now standing in the middle of the crime scene.

"Why do I even bother believing a word you say?" I hissed at him, attempting to kick the man but he quickly side stepped me. I gritted my teeth. "Ugh, plus it's already dark, Dazai. It's gonna be harder to find any evidence." Indeed, the only light we were getting was from the full moon up ahead, and the shitty lights above the side door of one of the buildings. "Are we even allowed to be here?"

Dazai simply nodded his head. "Of course, we were assigned to this case, afterall."

"... you told me the police were keeping it," I said, eyebrows twitching in annoyance. Was he serious?!

Dazai just smiled and threw his hands up. "Guess I was mistaken," he hummed and I sighed deeply, rubbing my temples.

"Okay so... what now?" I asked, finally looking around the crime scene. It was obviously taped off and Taichi's body was removed. All there was left was a giant stain of blood, which I now looked at with a worried face.

"Just by the nature of the crime alone, we can easily say it was a crime of passion. If this was a local gang or rival, he would have been shot, or even jumped and beaten to death. Official word is, he was stabbed over sixty times," Dazai explained, standing beside me and staring at the blood. "There is no sign of the murder weapon, no other physical evidence besides Taichi's dead body and blood. We'll have to wait for forensics to give us their final word, but I can tell... this might not be so easy to crack."

I nodded solemnly, my fists clenched tightly.

"Or... will it?"

I took in a deep breath before turning and sending Dazai a sheepish smile. "Well, we got our work cut out for us, huh."

Dazai chuckled softly. "Yeah, but that's what makes it fun."

"So Dazai," I started, crossing my arms over my chest. "I have a question."

"I may have an answer."

"Have you ever killed anyone before?"

Silence followed after my question and I turned to look at the man. His hands were in his pockets, a weird smile on his face. "I have. Quite a few."

For some reason, the answer didn't shock me as much as it probably should. "How do you sleep at night?"

More silence, before Dazai stood before me. I looked up at him, heart thudding when I saw that same dim look in his eyes. His lips curled up and he leaned in, making me hold my breath as he whispered.

"Like a baby."

My breath hitched in my throat, eyes going wide. I licked my lips nervously, nodding my head slowly. "I see..." Just... wow.

"You know, I could have gone without seeing your ugly face, Dazai."

A look of distaste grew on Dazai's face as the newcomer came sauntering up to us. He wore black, a familiar hat resting upon a familiar head of red hair. Blue eyes stared daggers into my coworker, mouth curled into a displeased snarl.

"Ah, Chuuya! It is a small world, after all," Dazai sang, the glare in his eyes not meeting the jovial tone of his voice.

Chuuya scoffed. "I thought you'd be fucking dead by now, but of course, you always love to piss me off."

"'Cause it's so much fun!"

The two men clearly didn't like each other, but that was the least of my concerns. All I could do was stare at Chuuya in shock. Of course, Taichi was one of his subordinates, he would want to find out who his killer was and get retribution. That was just how the Port Mafia worked.

I gulped, carefully trying to back away from the two. They could stand there and bicker with each other all they want. I had to get out of here before-

"Oh wait, meet my new friend!" Dazai wrapped his arm around my neck, wrestling me to his side effortlessly as I tried to break free. He knew I was trying to escape and made sure that didn't happen.

"Hey, let me go!" I hissed, not pleased with being pulled into a damn chokehold.

"Not until you meet my old friend!"

Chuuya growled. "We're not friends, damn traitor!"

Traitor? I grew confused, eyebrows pinched even as I fought against Dazai's hold. Chuuya narrowed his eyes when he finally got a good look at me.

"Hey... do I know you?"

Crap. "Uh..." I laughed sheepishly, Dazai now confused as he looked back and forth between the two of us.

"You know each other?"

"W-well..."

"We met a few months ago," Chuuya spoke up, his eyes widening in realization before his eyes narrowed and he snarled.  "Knew you couldn't be trusted."

"Wait!" I exclaimed, making it out of Dazai's hold and holding my hands up to Chuuya. "I swear... I didn't even know about the ADA when we met. It was just as I said that night, I lost my job and was there to drink my pain away."

"Tch," Chuuya sounded, his eyes still narrowed. "And now you work with this traitorous bastard. Lucky you."

There was that word again.

"What do you mean by traitor?" I asked, at the same time Dazai spoke up.

"How the hell do you two know each other?"

Chuuya scoffed. "I fucked her."

I squeaked, Dazai's eyebrows raising.

"Interesting. I'm fucking her too."

I squeaked again, waving my hands wildly before either man could respond. "D-don't we have a murder to solve, huh?!"

It fell on deaf ears, the two men staring each other down, all before their eyes were on me and my trembling form.

"You know... I feel like we've been here before, Chuuya."

Said man snorted. "When you fucked my girls?"

"Like you haven't fucked mine?"

Okay, now I was confused. "Um... I don't understand..."

"Oh yeah!" Dazai exclaimed a bit too cheerfully, putting a hand on Chuuya's shoulder, earning a withering glare. "Chuuya and I go way back. Were the best of friends."

"No we weren't."

"We were partners! The best there was!"

"... tch."

Partners? What the hell did Dazai mean by partners? I looked between the two men, lips formed in a thin line. Then, the answer struck and my mouth fell open in shock. There was no fucking way... Dazai? I swallowed thickly, shaking my head for this was not the time or place to be thinking about this.

"Okay... I can only imagine just how deep this shit goes," I started, the men looking at me curiously. "But we have a murder to solve. Whatever... this," I gestured my hand between the two of them. "Is... it can wait. Y'all can make out or whatever later."

That was my attempt at breaking whatever tension there was, but I was the only one cackling when Dazai and Chuuya immediately protested.

"I will kill you!"

"That is not funny, bella!"

"Ugggh, I don't have the time for this. I should have known that the ADA would be investigating this, and that just pisses me off. You two should just stay out of my way," Chuuya said, hands in his coat pocket. "Though you... word is that you were one of the lasts who saw Taichi alive."

My heart dropped when Chuuya looked at me and I frowned. "And I told the police that I saw him when he dropped Keiko off at my apartment. There are cameras in the lobby that will show that I never left the apartment. We even ordered food in."

"Fuck. And there is no other evidence right now. No weapon, no hints of DNA. It's like the killer just vanished," Chuuya said to himself and I glanced at Dazai, seeing the amused look on his face.

"What if it was an ability user?" Dazai suggested. Chuuya gritted his teeth.

"Shut up! I don't need your help!"

"Really? Are you sure?" Dazai taunted the red head, quickly ducking when Chuuya swung his foot in a wide kick. Dazai didn't get hit, but the wall behind him took the damage, large cracks forming on the surface. I swallowed thickly. Just how strong was Chuuya?

"H-hey," I started nervously, foolishly getting between the two men before they could start a fight. "We're after the same goal, right? Why don't we just... work together?" The fierce glares I got made me shrink. "O-o-or! Or not! That's fine! Just don't fight!"

"Bella is right... fighting is so beneath me," Dazai said wistfully and I sighed deeply.

"Dazai, I'm being serious. This man was my best friend's boyfriend. I want to find his killer too."

"Just stay out of it," Chuuya growled. "This has nothing to do with either of you. The Port Mafia will handle this."

"Let's make it a race then." Both Chuuya and I were dumbfounded as we looked at Dazai, waiting for him to continue. "A competition to see who figures this out, the ADA or the Port Mafia."

"Dazai... what the hell?" I asked in disbelief, Chuuya stepped closer to him.

"What's the prize?"

Dazai smirked, raising a bandaged hand and pointing right to me. "Our bella."

My jaw dropped. "You're fucking kidding me?"

"No," Dazai answered rather seriously. "I'm not."

Chuuya is strangely quiet, his unreadable eyes now trained on me. I fidgeted under his gaze, looking away to find Dazai staring at me all the same. I shivered. I hated this; hated being part of such a stupid competition as a prize, and I hated that I fucking loved it. I screwed my eyes shut.

"Deal," Chuuya finally said and I gasped when I felt his familiar leather clad fingers cup my face, him moving my head to make me look at him. "Gotta say, I didn't expect to see you again, but I'm glad our paths have crossed a second time." I became extremely flustered and Chuuya smirked. "Tell me, Dazai. What was it like having my sloppy seconds?"

I gasped sharply with Dazai only laughing darkly, suddenly feeling his presence behind me. "Can't say it was too bad..." he answered and I just completely clocked out, breath hitching as I felt a bit embarrassed. And turned on. They knew exactly what to say to get me riled up.

"Okay, I'm leaving! It's late and I still haven't eaten dinner yet! Bye!" I was frantic trying to rush away from them as fast as I could. I didn't even turn back when Dazai called after me.

"See you tomorrow, bella!" Dazai chuckled softly, watching me disappear, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"A race? Really?" Chuuya asked incredulously, eyes piercing as he stared at his old partner.

"It will just make this all the more fun," Dazai hummed.

"You're a bastard," Chuuya scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Just stay out of my way. Taichi getting himself killed just ruined the investigation we had on him."

"Oh?" Dazai raised his eyebrows, amused. "Was he being a naughty boy?"

"Shut the fuck up, Dazai."

-End

I have this headcanon that Dazai and Chuuya definitely stole each other's girls and even shared them and had threesomes when they were partners and ya'll CANNOT tell me otherwise.

[shadyteacup]

Hello there <3

I hope I’m not bothering you with this request.. May I have a Dazai x Fem!Reader where the reader is getting “joke” comments on her slight overweightedness and like.. it hurts? And Dazai tries his best to comfort his s/o who breaks down in front of him, does his best to show that nothing related to appearance could change his undying love?

The usual comfort/fluff genre, I’d be really so glad but if you can’t/you feel uncomfortable, it’s totally alright, I adore your works ❤️

Hi there, love! I just want you to know that you deserve all the happiness in the world, and that you are beautiful ♡ it took me some time to love myself, but now that I do, I'm unstoppable. Love your body, it's beautiful, no matter what others might say. Give yourself love, because you're worth it!

||Dazai Osamu x fem! Reader|| Tw: slight nsfw (kissing), strong language.

You're Perfect for Me

"Dazai, who's this?" , a tall, beautiful woman asks as she leans against the wall, sipping her champagne.

"This is Y/N! She's my beautiful s/o."

Dazai pecks your cheek and pulls you closer by the waist.

"Oi, Dazai! I've got some people that want to meet you!"

Kunikida called from across the hall.

Dazai excused himself.

The A.D.A was hosting a party for saving the city, yet again. Everyone related to the members, along with people of influence across the globe were invited. The party was being held in a spacious hall, elegant lighting and decor adorning the place.

The woman in front of you was an agent of the government. Since the A.D.A had worked along with the Special Division for Unusual Powers, every agent of theirs was also invited.

"So you're Dazai's woman. I have to say, I was expecting someone.. lankier, considering Dazai's slender form."

She spoke with a smile on her face. It all seemed so innocent, but you could easily pick up on the jab.

You laughed it off.

"Iko! There you are! I've been searching for you."

Another beautiful woman walked over to the two of you.

"And who might this be?", she asked, smiling politely at you.

"That's Dazai's woman. Y/N, meet Ichigo."

You both shook hands.

"Well, you're certainly on the healthy side! Good for you! You must never need sweaters, right?"

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, you know what I mean. You have a natural layer of protection. You don't need sweaters for the cold."

She said it with a smile, but her words stabbed your heart. You couldn't handle it anymore.

"Excuse me for a second."

You hurriedly walked over to an empty balcony, observing the night sky.

A couple walked in, both a bit tipsy.

"Ah! Hello there! I didn't see you here."

One of them said when they spotted you.

"Kinda hard to miss her, dear. Let's go."

The other said, dragging his boyfriend out.

Your throat felt tight and your eyes stung from the tears that wanted to be set free. Your whole life, you have worked hard to get what you wanted. You still strive to study hard, work hard, and become successful. But nobody seems to acknowledge that. All they see is your overweight body. You didn't mean for it to be like this. You didn't choose your body. You were born with it. So why does everyone comment on it? Why can't they appreciate what you have achieved?

A sob found it's way out of you, and you gripped the railing.

Were you really nothing more than your body? Was there nothing more to you?

You heard footsteps behind you. You tried to stop crying and quickly rubbed your tears away.

"Y/N?", Dazai's voice sounded from the entrance of the balcony.

When you didn't respond, he walked in, and stood next to you.

"I was wondering where you'd gone. What's on your mind?"

He asked, gazing at the moon, failing to notice your tear streaked expression.

"I think.. I think we should break up."

Your broken whisper made Dazai look over at you.

He noticed your dried tears and the redness around your eyes.

"I'm so sorry. Is it something I said? Or did? Please don't cry."

He cupped your cheek. You moved back, avoiding his touch. His heart sank at that.

"No, it's not you. It's just... you deserve better."

You said, looking away from him.

"You're kidding, aren't you?"

Dazai said.

You shook your head.

"No. I'm serious."

Dazai held your hands in his, forcing you to look at him.

"Y/N, you're the best thing that has happened to me. I love you. I don't deserve you. You're the most precious person to exist, and I'd die protecting you. Please, you have to understand, you're the most amazing person. You gave me, a killer, another chance at a happy life."

Your tears were streaming down your face as you tried to get away from him.

"Are you crazy? You're not a killer, Dazai. You might have done some bad things, but you're a good hearted soul. You're so handsome, so charming. You can have any girl you want. So why me? Why would you go for a fat, pathetic woman like me?!"

"Whoa, hold on! Who the fuck thinks you're pathetic? You're fucking awesome, Y/N."

"But I'm not sexy! I'm not like other girls! I'm just chubby, and unattractive and undeserving."

"So what if you're chubby?! You're sexy! You attract me! I can't keep my eyes off you, damnit, I want to take you right here right now! When I saw you in this gown tonight I couldn't wait to ravish you. I wanted to surprise you, but let me tell you, ever since I saw you in this dress, I've been planning to take you home and fuck you senseless. Because that's how mad you drive me. I love you, Y/N. You're the only person that can understand me. I can't live without you. Please don't leave me..."

You gaped at him. He really did love you. He wasn't doing you a favor by being with you. He's with you because he really loves you.

"Are.. are you sure you want me?"

Dazai grabbed your face in his hands and kissed you. He deepened the kiss. The feeling of his tongue against your own was driving you crazy. He pressed you against the railing, not giving you a chance to breathe.

He finally pulled back, panting at you.

"That proof enough?"

Through the daze, you nodded.

"Don't worry. I'll prove it to you as soon as we get home."

Tonight was going to be a long night for the two of you.

[dreamkidddream]

Hello! Congrats!! Well deserved omg! Could you write the quote number 8 for Kunikida please? This man deserves so much more love! (but if it's already taken, then quote number 5) Take care! <3

Thank you!!! I hope you’re staying safe and doing well ☺️ Kunikida deserves so much more love than he gets and I will forever stand by that (there will be NO Kunikida slander here 😤😤) and this was so cute. Reader is gender neutral!

TW: small spicy/suggestive mention, but it’s nothing graphic or extreme (literally just one small mention of undressing, but nothing graphic)

Prompt: “Is that my shirt?” with Kunikida!

You cannot remember anything from last night.

Okay maybe you’re exaggerating just a bit, but you can’t remember the whole night. You remember celebrating a case well done at the agency, having more than just a few drinks, and then the night became blurry after that.

So waking up in a room that isn’t yours, in a bed that isn’t yours, just about gave you a heart attack. But, you didn’t wake up next to someone, and you still had your same clothes on, so you felt somewhat relieved. You weren’t handcuffed, and you still had all of your limbs intact, and the room wasn’t a dungeon or someone’s basement, so that was a plus sign.

The room looked rather plain, not much hanging on the walls and only having the bare necessities in there. You can see a nightstand, a decent sized TV, along with a bookcase filled with different sized novels and textbooks. When you did get up (really when your head stopped spinning) to take a closer look, you could also see...notebooks?

You picked one up, really focusing on it, and now that you’re up close, these look like the ones that Kunikida use-

Oh no.

Oh nonononono-

This is Kunkida’s room? You’re at his place?! Oh, you could just pass out right now, and you would have crawled back in bed and go back to sleep if it was your bed and not his! Oh, this is just mortifying-

A knock on the door resounded in the room

“(Y/N)? Are you awake yet?”

You choked on your spit, and dropped the notebook, the thud echoing in the room. Damnit!

You heard him sigh through the door, just picturing the irritation growing on his face. “I’m assuming that you are. Well make yourself decent and come out. We have some things that we need to discuss.”

You wanted to bang your head on the wall, but you know that it would just prolong confronting him (and make your headache worse). You couldn’t hide in there forever, but after catching a huge stain of whatever on your shirt, you would feel even more embarrassing going out there with it on (not to mention that you look and feel absolutely filthy, you wanted a shower more than anything!). So, you just so happened to fall upon a black dress shirt that was neatly folded on the nightstand next to you, you took the initiative and changed into it.

Did Kunikida purposely leave that out for you? You assumed so, you know how organized the man is, and it wouldn’t make sense why he would just leave it out if he didn’t. You won’t lie, the action made your heart flutter (even more than it already does when you’re around him), and you felt a little giddy knowing that you could wear one of his shirts, despite under the current circumstances.

You still had your bottoms on, which were left unscathed and clean somehow, and you took a breath.

You couldn’t hide forever, and with that, you opened the door.

—-

The first thing your eyes landed on was Kunikida already dressed, furiously writing in his notebook, glasses perched on top of his head, pacing back and forth while mumbling to himself. You took the time to scan his apartment, being just as plain as him room but still having a type of charm to it (a charm that only Kunikida can have). It wasn’t until you cleared your throat that he froze. He snapped his head up at you, and you just mentally prepared yourself for getting chewed out.

“Well, glad to see that you’re finally up. Have a seat”, he lead you to sit at his kitchen table, him pulling a chair out for you and taking a seat across. “How’s your head?”

“Oh it’s...fine?”

“Are you sure?”

Okay, he’s not fussing at you yet, which is a good sign. The tension that you felt in your body slowly started to ease away, your shoulders being relaxed again.

“Yeah. If anything, my throat’s a little dry-”

“Because I would think after acting like a reckless party animal with no self control would leave your head anything but fine.”

Oop, you spoke too soon.

“Do you have any idea to how you acted last night?! In front of the President no less!”

“Erm, uh-”

“I would expect this from morons like Dazai but not from you! Not to mention how much you could have been put in danger if I wasn’t there!”

While he’s disciplining you like a parent would to a young child, you just pretty much sit there and take it. You somewhat deserve it, you probably messed up his schedule that he meticulously wrote in his notebook. So you’ll listen, but at the same time, you could only take your stomach growling so much, and you wouldn’t mind having at least a glass of water-

“And another thing! What if you would have gotten alcohol poisoning?! You’re old enough to control- wait.” He leaned closer, his green-gray eyes glistening in the sun rays peeking through his blinds.

“Is-is that my shirt?”

“Huh? Oh...yeah?”

His eyes widened, then he went quiet. He promptly leaned back into his seat and coughed in his hand, which is conveniently trying to cover the red dying his face (and failing).

“Just-just be careful next time. I’ll get started on breakfast.”

Whatever thought he had stopped at the tip of his tongue, and he got up from the table, leaving you somewhat confused. Maybe you weren’t suppose to wear the shirt like you thought...

So you got up too, and starting making your way back into his room to your discarded shirt. “Hey, if it makes you uncomfortable, I’ll change back into my-”

“N-NO! I mean- don’t worry about it. I-I don’t mind. I know your clothes aren’t clean, and I’ll take you home after so that you can get properly changed.”

You didn’t believe him. He couldn’t even look you in the eyes, how can you? Even looking at him from over here, you can see how red his ears are. But, maybe he wasn’t used to this? Your heart would be racing too if the roles were reversed. While handling a drunk Kunikida made you chuckle, you really appreciated his efforts. He dealt with all your antics while you were drunk, gave you his own bed to sleep in while he bunked on his own couch, and now he’s even cooking you breakfast. And he didn’t have to do any of that!

This man is a keeper, you swear.

So you have to repay him back somehow, and you will. You hugged him from behind before he could say anything, and gave him a peck on his cheek (or that’s what you were aiming for, but ended up kissing behind his ear).

“Thank you, Kunikida”, your voice was muffled from hiding your face in his back, but the message still got across. “I really do mean it. Thanks.”

He practically short circuited, words jumbling together to form some type of “you’re welcome”. Stepping back, you gave him a smile and offered to help with breakfast, which lead him to sending you to the bathroom to clean up a little more (which you reasoned was to help get himself together and not look like a bumbling fool in front of you).

Kunikida watched you walk from the corner of his eyes, hiding his own smile from you.

Bonus:

“So, how come you didn’t just take me home? I can’t imagine how annoying I probably was last night. Scratch that, I can”, you chewed on pancakes, happy that your stomach and throat were finally satisfied.

“Well, I did, but you left your keys at the agency, and thought we were playing ‘I Spy’ when I kept asking you where the spare was when we got to your apartment.”

“Oh...yikes. Well, thanks for letting me crash here, and letting me borrow your shirt. It’s really comfy too!”

He cleared his throat, “It’s not a problem. Just be more responsible next time you’re drinking, I’m not your personal babysitter you know!”

You just laughed and nodded your head, cheeks full of food.

Kunikida didn’t lie, you really did leave your keys at the office, but he didn’t have it in him to tell you that he was fine with that. He didn’t feel okay leaving you by yourself at all last night. You didn’t stay in a bad part of town necessarily, but what if he left and you forgot to lock the door, and someone walked in behind him? Not to mention the killer hangover you would have to face when you woke up.

He remembers that you always say that you trust him with your life, so he took you to his place, fed you some food, washed your face, and laid you on his bed (all the while you acted like a clingy kid, refusing to let him go the whole time).

He took out his shirt with the intent to change, but decided against it. He didn’t want you to wake up and think you got taken advantage of, that he’s some kind of creep!

Plus, he only wanted to undress you when you two are actually together and reach that point in your relationship, not while you’re in this state, even if it’s to do something as innocent as changing your dirty shirt.

So he just tossed it aside, tucked you in, and admired you from the door once everything was done. Sleeping on the couch wasn’t very ideal, but he’s fine with it if it means that you’ll be safe and comfortable in his bed.

He would do anything for you, and while he may complain, if it means that you’re safe and happy, then he’ll make sure that it gets done.

[spacegirlapollo]

Can’t Be Friends [Dazai x Reader Smut]

Dazai x Reader Smutty One shot 

4,000+ words

Summary: After the death of his beloved friend, Dazai can’t trust love. But then you come bumbling into the picture and he can’t resist falling for you. 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dazai had always been fascinated by magnets, that somewhere written deep in the earth's rules, it had been decided that two objects would eternally be bound together if fate allows them to. On the other hand they could push the other away, with the same ease. 

He’s lived his life like a magnet, especially after Oda’s death. He couldn’t help it, although he desperately tried to not care about others it was simply impossible. To fulfill Oda’s dying wishes , he had to care about the people around him. He dared not admit it but he cared. He cared about Kunikida and the others at the agency. He especially cared about Atsushi and thought quite often of Chuuya and Akutagawa and how they were faring. To many souls to think about. So he cared, drawing them all in like magnets, connecting and then turning away pushing back against them when they got to close. 

And at the center of it all was you. You were the crowning jewel in his grand hall of people he cared about, thought and worried and languished about. You reminded him of Oda sometimes. And if he squinted at you maybe he could see Oda’s piercing eyes and not so easy smile.

He was in love with you, that much was sure, and it was a secret, to everyone but him. He was much too smart to not understand his longing for you, the way his heart rate picked up at your closeness and he often found himself longing to hear your voice. 

He didn’t think it would happen to him of all people. Sure he loved Oda, and he wasn’t sure if it was just as friends either, but this was different. 

He’d met you almost immediately after his return to society, now on the side of the “good guys”. You were Fukizawa’s niece and a fixture at the agency. He wondered often how long his stay at the agency would have been had it not been for you. 

In the beginning, Dazai couldn’t help himself, he had absolutely no self control over his magnets and the two of you connected, making quick friends. Wherever you went he would gladly follow. 

Then you’d been attacked, remnants of Dazai’s past life finally rearing consequences upon you. You’d nearly died, even though you were a force to recon with in battle. Fukizawa had been the one to save you in the end. It was salt over Dazai’s wound that you were hurt because of him, and he hadn’t been there to save you. 

It was a hard way to learn a lesson. To be smacked in the face with his universal truth. Everyone he gets close to will die, and it’ll be his fault. 

You weren’t so easy to push away though, ripping you from his life was taking a piece of his soul slowly, and besides he’d promised to be good and the Agency was the best place for that. So he stayed, but your friendship suffered in its wake. You got the message eventually, not bothering to call upon him at midnight anymore and late night trips for food had stopped. 

You’d never let on how it made you feel, and that somehow was worse for Dazai. 

He’d thought you’d replace him, he was mentally prepared to see you and Kunikida laughing At the lunch table. But it was more often that you’d head to lunch alone, or leave work alone. 

With newcomer Atsushi, things changed a little. You’d taken a strong liking to the boy, and he could tell you’d adopted Atsushi, as If you were his mother or aunt or something. Fretting and worrying. Dazai could see that the two of you were co-parenting in a way. 

Then Kyouka came and you and Atsushi’s time spent together became less, and you ate alone once again. 

Dazai observed this all as if he was peering into a fish bowl. Observing the lives of others and indirectly interacting with them but never jumping into the water. He thought himself clever. No one would know how much he loved you. That was until simple, observant Atsushi said something. 

“Dazai-San?” 

“Yeah?” 

They were both sitting in the open floor plan area of the agency, paperwork stacking high between the two of them. On his part Atsushi was trying to conquer the work while Dazai was listening in to your conversation with Kunikida from across the room. You were laughing, and Dazai thought maybe this was it, you were finally replacing him. Good. 

“Uh…” 

Dazai lifted his eyes from you and his partner to rest upon Atsushi, whose voice was uncertain. Dazai had learned from day two, that he should listen to Atsushi, who occasionally sculpted diamonds from words. 

Atsushi tensed with Dazai’s eyes upon him. 

“I was just .... “ he sighed and swallowed his voice coming out low and a whisper. 

“Are you and Y/N dating?” 

Dazai blinked. Not responding, although that might give away more than he would have liked. 

“It’s just that.” Atsushi seemed even more unnerved by Dazai’s non answer, seeing as the brown hair boy loved to talk. 

“You always look up when she enters a room, like you know she’s there. You always stare at each other when you think the other isn’t looking.” Atsushi’s voice faded off. “Stuff- stuff like that.” 

Dazai was half stuck thinking that he’d made a good choice of Atsushi for the Agency, and the other half was thinking about what he’d said. - staring at each other.- 

You looked at him too? 

“S-sorry.” Atsushi said, fearing he’d said too much. He had but that was fine. 

“Am I really that easy to read?” Dazai asked his eyes back on you and Kunikida. Kunikida was blushing as you walked away, his eyes firmly on your lower back side. Dazai felt a feeling stirring in him. But he shoved it down harsly. There was no place for those feelings to show. 

Atsushi shook his head. “No, you're quite hard to read. Dazai-San. Y/N is much easier to read, once I understood why she looks at you like that I realized you were looking at her the same way.”

Diamonds. Dazai thought , Atsushi was capable of making diamonds. 

————-

It was the fall time, the leaves had departed from their family tree or changed colors and the roads of Yokahama were cold and filled with that feeling you only got during the coming of winter. 

Dazai had to work late, once Kunikida found out just how behind he was on his work, Dazai had been essentially chained to his desk. He could tell there were a few people left in the office as some lights were still on. Signing the last page he sighed standing up immediately, Kunikida would be satisfied with his progress and he could pick it up again on Monday, although he was secretary hoping for a case to come and push the paperwork to the side. 

He tucked his hands in his pocket and made his way outside. It was a moment later that he realized that it was raining. The door to the cafe closed behind him and he stood under the awning, thinking with dread about walking through the rain to the subway station.

“No umbrella ?” You asked, and Dazai wasn’t sure how you’d been standing there that whole time and he did not notice. He turned to you his heart thudding rhythmically in his chest. You were as beautiful as ever, and you looked warm, swathed in faux fur jackets. He thought about how wonderful it would feel to lay in your lap and feel your fingers through his hair. 

You turned away from him breaking his guilty illusion and rummaged around in your bag. You pulled out an umbrella, identical to the one you were already holding. You extended it out to him with a smile playing on your lips. 

“You never carry an umbrella, Dazai.” 

His name on your lips was joy, he realized as his lips parted in surprise. You knew him entirely too well and Atsushi was starting to as well. How had he failed so spectacularly in pushing people away. 

He took the umbrella, unable to stop the smile on his face. 

“Why would I ,Y/N when I always have you to have an extra for me?” He teased. He couldn’t help it, months of pushing you away and he was cracking like an egg from a simple gesture. 

Your eyes met and he saw the faintest blush upon your cheeks. He wanted to kiss you. Badly. He blinked and looked away. This wouldn’t do, he needed to get home and fast. 

He would let his mind slip for one night, maybe have a drink or two and stroke himself, your name hanging off his lips like smoke to a cigarette. That’s what he would do. He just needed to get to the station now. 

“Dazai?” 

Your words were soft but firm. The way you sounded when you’d gathered up all tour couraged and readied yourself for a fight. 

He turned back to you, and your eyes shone with determination. 

“Let’s go get dinner together.” 

————-

Dinner, was located in a small corner of Yokohama, that only the locals seemed to know about. You either lived there or crashed there by accident. The restaurant was a hole in the wall, quite literally. It was an interesting place, made of stone and brick, with no real windows or doors, just, holes in the stone. It reminded Dazai of an old century oven, it had a large awning covering to keep the rain from the tables out front. Strings of light were laced around the stone building illuminating it in the darkness of the Yokahama streets. 

It was a place that the both of you were familiar with, having spent many nights here, sipping hot tea and talking. Upon seeing it for the first time in months, Dazai saw just how romantic the place really was and was regretting his decision to follow you here. 

Now seated you picked up the menu and started to scan it. 

“You already know what you want. Y/N” Dazai said amused. “You always order the same thing.” 

His smile grew as you put down the menu and glared at his teasing. “What if I wanted something different this time.” 

“Hell would freeze over Y/N. And the flying pigs would be out as soon as the rain stopped.” 

You scoffed cutely. “just for that I’m ordering something different.” 

“I wouldn’t.” Dazai said, “ you remember the last time you were adventurous.” 

Your eyes were wide with embarrassment. 

“You swore you would never bring it up!” 

“To anyone else.” Dazai corrected. He thought back on the time you’d ordered something new, and were so sick he’d brought you home, and had to hold your hair as you puked over the toilet. Obviously embarrassing for you but a fondly domestic memory for Dazai. 

The waitress interrupted whatever you were going to say next and further Dazai’s amusement you ordered your regular. 

“Dazai” you said after the waitress had collected your orders and it had been quiet for a while. Dazai’s heart started to thump again, the real reason you’d asked him to come to dinner was coming. He wasn’t sure if he was ready for it. 

You had that look again, that stored up courage look. “ Let’s be friends again.”

He wasn’t sure if this was on his list of things he expected you to say. Some irrational part of his thought this would be your announcement of your engagement to Kunikida which he would have congratulated you on and then left to get very very drunk. 

Your fists were clenched in your lap as you forced yourself to look at him.

“I’m sorry… if I did something wrong, and that’s why you stopped wanting to be around me. If I was - annoying or something I can-“

“Y/N” you blinked almost jerking at Dazai’s sudden harsh tone. He was angry, suddenly, 

“You could never annoy me.” 

The statement hung heavy in the air like cement. 

“And you don’t have anything to apologize for.” He tried to soften his voice as he wasn’t angry at you. He was more angry at himself. That’s why you thought he’d pushed you away? 

“Then why-“

“We can’t be friends.. Y/N” better to cut this off now. A few drinks was sounding better by the second. He dared a glance at your face and regretted it. You looked shattered, then confused, then angry. He hadn’t really seen you angry. It was beautiful in a way. 

A hot tear pressed down your cheek and you angrily wiped it away. 

“Why.” You asked now a wobble in your otherwise hard tone. 

“It’s better to remain professional in the workplace.” Dazai offered up, it was weak but his mind was spinning so his normal snake charming words were not coming to him. 

“Bullshit.” You said leaning forward. “You're not that way with anyone else in the agency. Hell you're not professional at all.” 

Dazai smiled at this, despite how heavy he was feeling.

“That’s fair.” He said softly. 

“Stop fucking with me Dazai.” You said anger still dripping over your tone although you were trying to keep it down since others were around. 

“One night were drunk together and up till 4am telling each other everything and the next week you stopped talking to me.” 

Your voice broke at the end of that. Another angry tear wipe. You pointed at him now.

“You let me in, you let me see you, and now you're going to pretend like we weren’t something?”

“Yes.” Dazai said with an edge . “ yes I am going to pretend.” 

“Why!” Your voice went a little higher than a regular speaking voice drawing a few more eyes but neither of you cared. There was only the person sitting in front of the other. 

“Because Y/N. I don’t want to be just friends.” Dazai felt like a popped balloon, that air just coming out of him rapidly. Years of holding that very phrase in and here he was whisper- shouting it at you in his favorite hole in the wall. That was only his favorite because of his memories with you. 

He kept going now, no sense in stopping now. “ I want to hold your hand, to kiss you, to be the last thing you see at night and the first thing you see in the morning. I want to hold you when you're sad, and tease you when you do something embarrassing. I want you to fill up my life with your light” it was a mouthful, and Dazai sighed, looking up at you now, your face in shock. 

You smiled suddenly, another tear falling but you didn’t make a move to wipe it away.

“I don’t want to be just friends either Dazai.” You said and he felt his heart starting its kathunk kathunk in his chest again. 

“I thought maybe you didn’t feel the same way as I did. But I wanted to be near you. And things were so great when we were friends. And then we stopped and I thought at least I could still be around you. But I don’t want that it’s not enough. Just being around you, just being your friend isn’t enough. I want to be with you. Dazai.”

Dazai swallowed hard, if Atsushi’s words were diamonds you were like the rain. Cleansing away the unsightly parts of himself that he hated, he picked at. Soothing the old wounds that he’d left open as punishment to himself. 

“We can’t… I can’t….” Dazai couldn’t finish. He looked up to you. “Every Time I love someone they die.” He shook his head slightly. “and I won’t lose you too.” 

He thought then of Oda. He still couldn’t decide how he’d loved the man, there was a seed there, growing, and if he’d had more time, Dazai thinks he could have figured it out. Did he love Oda the way he loved Atshushi or Kunikida or did he love Oda the way he’d loved you?

But for Oda to be alive, and Dazai to have an answer to that question, Dazai needed to have removed himself from Oda’s life.

 Dazai’s thoughts of Oda evaporated as he felt the warm touch of your hand to his. He looked up at you then, your eyes a calm steady sea to his stormy brooding ones.

He wanted to steal you away from the others eyes, take you somewhere safe where only he could gaze upon you. Strange feelings from someone who spent so much effort in not caring. 

“You're a good person, Dazai.” You said. “I’ve seen it, I’ve seen your soul. Death is not the punishment for love. Life takes who she wants when she wants regardless of who we love and what we want. I’d rather die, having known your love than live forever without it.” 

He kissed you then, over the tea that had gone cold, besides the people who were pretending not to listen to your conversation. The only thing he could hear was the sounds of rain dancing on the canopy above your heads. 

———

Somehow the both of you knew that going home alone wasn’t an option. As the hole in the wall was closest to your place, it was decided without speaking that that is where you would go. You walked there holding hands. 

Dazai’s mind was spinning with thoughts of your kiss, thoughts of you he’d tried to keep down but it wasn’t working and his pants were stiffening. 

You’d looked at him, one look, that set him on fire. And as you crossed into your apartment threshold, he couldn’t seem to grab enough of you. The umbrella he’d borrowed from you was on the floor, along with your  pretty coat, leaving wet stains on the floor. You were pressed between him in the wall, your hands deep into his tresses as he kissed you, his hands gripping almost painfully at your sides. 

He pressed his lower body up against you unable to control the moan that came from his mouth at the contact of his hardened self against you.

“I need you.” He breathed out sounding so impossibly vulnerable.

“You have me.” You said between kisses, and so he did, his wide palms sliding below your waist end scooping you into the air, your legs wrapped around his lanky figure. 

He carried you to your room, my memory as you had yet to stop kissing him, and he couldn’t see. 

When he was there you fell into the bed, soft covers swallowing you up. He had thoughts to tease you, to take things slow, and feel every single moment of this. But as his fingers seperated your pants buttons and found their way to your core he couldn’t stop himself from pleasuring you. 

Your moans were honey, as he slid down your clothing and his mouth latched to your clit. One of your hands had traveled to his hair and the other was gripping his arm which was around your waist keeping your hips down to the bed. 

He wanted more from you working his tongue and fingers at a devastating pace. His cock painful in his pants at your honey dripped moans. His hand pressed down hard against your waist as you bucked against his face, sweat beading on your chest, it felt terribly good. 

“Daz-“ you choked out as you reached your end, your hand pulling at the base of his roots causing him to moan into your pussy. 

You couldn’t hold back your moan as you came, hard and fast, cheeks hot as he kept going riding you through your orgasm. 

Dazai felt your body go limp after you came, and he stood up reaching to unbutton his shirt but then your hands over lapped his and you began to remove his shirt. His lips were on your again as your removed his clothes. 

Dazai let out a small noise of surprise when you turned and pushed him towards the bed. He went willingly though his eyes half lidded in lust as you crawled over to him straddling his waist. He was taking you in, and fuck if he couldn’t come now just looking at you. 

You leaned forward ticking a finger under his chin and guiding his lips back to yours. Dazai felt his control slipping but he didn’t mind. He wanted to be yours, all yours. You could do whatever you wanted to him.

“Let me make you feel good.”’you whispered 

He hissed as you sank slowly down onto him your warmth wrapping around him like a vice. Damnit.

You moved again rising up your hips and bringing them back down at an agonizingly slow pace. This whole time he’d thought to tease you and it was you teasing him. 

Almost as if you were reading his mind you smirked dipping slower to kiss his neck. Dazai jerked, another moan on his lips as you kissed at his newly discovered sensitive spot. 

You’d hip were starting to pick up the pace a bit, sucking hard against his neck. Your pace and attack on his neck was torture, the best kind. 

His hands gripped your ass tightly now as you rode him, biting deeply against his neck. With each slap of skin you moved faster, Dazai felt like he could explode, and maybe he would. 

He couldn’t help himself, his hips snapping up into you suddenly causing you to throw your head back and moan. Oh yes he wanted more of that. 

Your hands fell to his chest as he fucked you, his dick pressing up against that spot that was making you unravel. 

In one swift motion he’d switched the flow and you were on your back again, and he was in between you. Your hands flew around his neck as he re-entered you. 

“Mhfph” you choked out as he pressed deep into you, moaning your name sweetly into your ear. 

He was one with you, as close as his magnet could reach, and though the fear of losing you still loomed in his mind, Dazai was in true bliss. 

You were close, that feeling of knitting in your stomach, his strong deep strokes had left you gasping. 

“Osamu” you crooned, and he looked down at you now. 

“Say that again.” He breathed out. 

Dazai felt like he was going to unravel, right as you’d said his name, the way it slipped from your mouth had his heart racing. 

He thrusted faster , kissing along your neck now. 

“Say it, say it again.” He moaned out.

“Mmm Osamu, “ you repeated his name over and over again like a holy chant. “Please.” 

His strokes were coming uneven, as he leaned down to take your sweet lips with his again, fucking hell he was going to come now, in the woman he’d loved for years. 

“Come with me.” He breathed out and you nodded rapidly, he pressed his forehead to yours as you felt yourself come apart at the edges. Sweeping in nothing but pleasure you both came.

“Osamu!” You cried out eyes shut in ecstasy. 

———-

Neither of you could be bothered to leave the bed. Dazai was holding you to his chest, your face in the crook of his neck, your heartbeats matching each other’s. 

“You know it’s too late for you now right?” You whispered, his fingers playing with your hair. 

Dazai smiled. “It was too late for me since the moment we met.” 

You chuckled softly, “that’s so cheesy.” 

Dazai chuckled back, placing a kiss on your forehead. 

“Yeah to bad you’ve got to deal with it from now on.”

“I love you, Osamu” Dazai heard you say, and even if he maybe thought he knew you did, it was different to hear you say it. He felt like he could break into a million pieces. Some stone cold bastard he was, he was absolute putty in your hands. 

“I love you to, Y/N” 

[bungou-stray-dingus]

Hey I like your blog a lot but I have to create an account to send this! :) can you write Dazai, Chuuya and Atsushi finding their s/o crying alone in the closet? Been feel down lately, thank 🥺💘

a/n : I hope you feel better. If you ever need to talk to someone I'm always here to talk to. I hope you like this sweetie. Much love to you, dear.

Dazai

He was used to you not answering your phone every time he called, you were an avid napper and he only called as much as he did to make sure you knew that he cared. He knew that you enjoyed waking up to see your phone screen filled with notifications from him, missed calls, and so many voicemails that the mailbox was filled completely.

He started getting slightly antsy when you didn't respond to any of his texts or calls by mid-evening. Sure, you napped a lot, but you never stayed asleep this long. You would at least have gotten up to use the restroom or get something to eat or something. "Maybe she just didn't check her phone..." He mused to himself, spinning around in his desk chair at the office, staring at his phone screen that was opened to your texts. He was waiting for those three little dots that would indicate that you were responding, that you were okay.

"Get off your phone, Dazai." Kunikida said, smacking the top of his head with his notebook as he walked by. He grunted and set his phone down on his desk, turning back to the work on the table. Sure, he didn't actually enjoy doing work, but it was the only thing that got his mind off the fact that you weren't writing back.

Back at the apartment you shot up in your bed, it felt like there was a giant weight on your chest, your head was pounding and your vision was going blurry as you felt the tears coming on. Nothing in particular had triggered your anxiety attack, sometimes it just happened. You clutched your hands to your chest as you kicked the blankets from around your legs, but they only got more tangled. Your breathing became harsher, the feeling of being trapped had you in a full blown panic and you kept kicking, trying to remove the blankets. You moved off the bed, and as you looked around you realized how dark it was. Your senses were heightened, you heard every noise from outside, you could feel the vibrations in the floor as trucks drove by, everything had you on edge.

You ran to the closet door, grabbing one of Dazai's shirts off the floor knowing that his scent would be on the shirt, you slumped down against the wall gripping the shirt tightly and bringing it up to your face, trying to find some comfort in his familiar musky scent. Your tears flowed silently as you rocked back and forth on the floor, trying to even out your breaths and calm down as much as you could.

It was 8:30 at night and you still hadn't responded to any of his calls or texts. He grabbed his coat off the back of his chair and slipped his arms through as he made his way out of the office. He was always the first person to leave, but nobody had ever seen Dazai move so quick. He ran out of the building, and luckily for him your apartment was only a block away. He started off in a sprint, his skin hyper aware, hoping to feel the much anticipated vibration of his phone in his pocket.

When he got to the apartment complex he saw that none of the lights were on in any of the windows and he began to panic, fumbling with the building key as he tried to unlock the main door to get in. He couldn't steady his hands and it took him a full two minutes just to get the key in the lock, but as soon as he did he had the door flung in and he was racing up that stairs, skipping two at a time to get to his floor as quick as he could.

He got to the apartment door and he was more careful this time, worrying that maybe someone was in there with you. He slowly unlocked the door and turned the handle, walking on his toes as he stepped into your shared apartment, careful not to make any of the floorboards creak or knock into anything. He didn't turn on any lights, but he could see in the moonlight that everything looked the same as the way he had left it this morning when he went to work. There was no sign of any struggling, but you were still nowhere to be found.

As he walked further into the house he could hear small whimpers coming from the bedroom. His mind jumped to conclusions, thinking that you had been attacked during your nap, and that the perpetrator had left you for dead. He ran as fast as he could, knocking into the decorative table that was against the wall, knocking off the pictures that had lined the table. He didn't care as the glass shattered against the hardwood floors, he just needed to get into the room.

He kicked open the bedroom door and heard your soft squeal from the closet. "Y/N?" He whispered your name as he walked over to the closet, opening the door to find you curled up in a ball on the floor of the closet. "Hey... you okay?" He asked, bending down to sit on the floor next to you. He was slightly taken aback as you scurried across the floor to move onto his lap, your arms wrapping around his neck, burying your face in his chest. "It's okay... It's okay, my belladonna. I'm here now."

He had only been slightly aware of your anxiety, you had never let on to him how bad it could get at any point during your relationship, and he surely hadn't seen you this bad off. It broke his heart to know that you had been crying by yourself in the closet for god knows how long. He cradled you against his chest, his arms loosely wrapped around you, not wanting you to feel too constricted in his hold, but he didn't want to let you go.

He would always nonchalantly ask how you were feeling every morning, making sure you were okay before he left for work. He set your phone up with a special ringtone for his calls and texts only so you knew it was him, and his texts would always be things along the lines of him telling you he loved you or asking if you were okay.

You were his beautiful belladonna, his one and only, and he wanted nothing more than for you to be okay.

Chuuya

He kissed you softly before leaving, not able to look directly at you as you pouted at him from the bed. It was supposed to be his day off, you had planned the entire day for the two of you and it was centered around him specifically. "I'll try to be back soon, baby." He said, trying not to let his frustration show through his words, he felt just as bad about leaving as you did seeing him leave.

When he got to work he realized that he had left his phone back at the penthouse, he was forgetful when he was aggravated. Now he couldn't even text you to let you know that he loved you, to tell you that he couldn't wait to see you. He was pissed at Mori for calling him in, and he was pissed at himself for accepting it. He could have said no, he should have said no. He knew that you had spent all week planning for this day, the two of you had been looking forward to it since the beginning of the week when he had informed you that he had a day off.

His phone started ringing and he picked it up, not giving the person on the other end a second to speak before he started screaming. "Will you just piss off! Leave me alone for a god damned minute!" He slammed the phone down onto the receiver and sighed. It felt good to let some of his anger out, and he didn't really care who the unsuspecting victim was on the other end of the line. Leaning his head against the back of his chair he looked up at the clock on the wall, it was already three in the afternoon, he wondered what you were doing.

You had called his phone once, just wanting to hear his voice. You missed him even more right now, knowing that he should be here with you and he wasn't. It wasn't fair, but it also wasn't his fault. You knew that he couldn't say no to his boss, it didn't take away the sting of watching him walk out that door though.

When his phone started vibrating on the nightstand you couldn't help but feel slightly annoyed. He wasn't here, and now you couldn't even talk to him because he had left without his cellphone. You sat on the bed trying to figure out what to do, and then you had it, the best idea! You pulled up the number pad and began dialing the number, it would connect you directly to his office.

You pressed the call button and held the phone to your ear, the smile already forming on your face as you waited for his voice to come through. Your mouth opened to speak, but he was faster, screaming at you through the line and you could only sit in shock, your mouth still hanging open as his voice rang in your ears. You were about to respond but you heard the phone slam on his end, and then the dead silence right before the dial tone.

Did he know it was you? Was he mad at you for calling while he was at work? Did he not like you calling his office phone? Your hands were shaking, you couldn't even hold your phone. It dropped down to the bed next to you and you slowly got up, your movements were robotic as you made your way to the kitchen. You grabbed the shot glass out of the cabinet and poured yourself a shot of whiskey. You hated the taste, but you hoped that the sting of the alcohol hitting your stomach would overpower the sting from Chuuya's words.

It didn't take much, you were a lightweight, and you soon found out that your tolerance for whiskey was even lower than your tolerance for vodka. Your head felt heavy, and when you got up to go back into the bedroom it felt like the gravitational pull was fifty times stronger than it had been before you had drank. You used anything and everything as a crutch as you walked to the room, but it seemed like with every step you took, the door moved back further. You had lost your footing and began crawling at this point towards the door, the entire room was spinning.

You don't know how you got in the closet, but when the door was shut, no light shone through and the lack of lighting helped ease your headache. The only problem now was that you were stuck with your over analytical drunken thoughts, and that wasn't a good thing at all. He hated you, he was going to leave you, that's why he accepted the job offer. He didn't want to be with you today in the first place. He was cheating on you. Your call had interrupted his fling with another woman. You started crying, and it didn't seem like it would ever end, the thoughts only continued to grow more and more painful as you dwelled on them longer.

Chuuya was called into the meeting room, and as he sat around the table he looked at everyone's faces. He expected one of them to look pissed at him, or maybe call him out for being such an ass to them over the phone, but none of them seemed phased. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Which one of you fuckers called me earlier?" They all looked confused, none of them had called him, but now he was the one confused. "Well who else has my office number?"

"I gave Y/N your office phone number, just in case there was an emergency and-" He held his hand up to cut Kouyou off, his other hand pinching the bridge of his nose as her words sank in. None of them had called... you were the only other person who would have that number... He had talked to you that way...

"Dammit!" He shouted, pushing back from the large table. Everyone's eyes followed him as he stormed out of the room, running back to his office to call back the last number. It rang and rang, but there was no answer. Then it went to voicemail. "HEEEEYYYY!!! This is Y/N! I can't make it to the phone right now... Chuuya stop! That ticklessss...." The message stopped and the beep sounded, but he couldn't speak.

He grabbed his keys off his desk and ran out the door, trying to think of what he would say, what could he say? If he had just given you the chance to speak before going off this wouldn't even be an issue. How would you even react to seeing him running through the door? Would you allow him to take you in his arms, would you listen to his apology? Surely you couldn't believe that he would purposely talk to you that way! He loved you dearly, he would never talk to you in that tone, even when you piss him off, which was a rarity, he still was able to keep his cool with you. You were too important to him to even think of talking to you in such a way that risked having you leave him.

He ran out of the building to his car, shoving the key into the ignition and pulling out of the lot, his tires squealing as they peeled across the asphalt. His fears were taking over as he sped down the freeway, hoping that he could make it to the penthouse before you left. He was so scared that you would walk out on him, and although it seems silly that you wold leave him over something so seemingly small, he knew how sensitive you were. You were so delicate, fragile... he was so worried that he had broken you.

He ran into the penthouse, his body was going the same speed his sports car had been going down the highways. Getting to you was of the utmost importance, he had to apologize, he had to tell you that he didn't mean to speak to you that way at all. When he walked in he saw the bottle of whiskey out on the counter, it was still open, the lid laying next to it. The small shot glass had a small tinge of your lipstick on the brim, and although he didn't like the idea of you drinking by yourself, at least he knew that you were still there.

"Y/N? Baby, where are you at?" He called out, looking around the open living area. He would have seen you when he walked in if you were there though, so he made his way to the bathroom door, knocking lightly before opening the door and peaking in, only to find it empty. He turned to the bedroom door that was still slightly cracked open, and that's when he heard your quiet sobs coming from the room.

He pushed the door open and looked around, expecting to find you on the bed, but it was empty as well. The sound had definitely come from this room though, so he looked around the room. A small hiccup sounded from the closet and he made his way over, tapping his knuckle against the door rhythmically before asking if he could open the door. You didn't respond, and he didn't quite know if that meant yes or no, but he didn't want to keep you waiting for an explanation, and he didn't want to stand around while you were obviously crying behind the door. He turned the knob slowly and pulled the door open, and when he saw you it was like his heart broke.

You were curled in the fetal position on the floor, clinging onto one of his hoodies like it was a lifeline, sobbing into the fabric. Your body was trembling with the shaky intermittent breaths you took in between your silent sobs. He dropped to the floor, reaching out a hand to place on your shoulder, but you jerked away from his touch. "I'm so sorry, Y/N." He whispered weakly, it killed him seeing you cry, knowing that it was his fault only made it worse.

"Was she prettier than me? Do you love her?" Your voice was muffled behind the hoodie, and he wasn't sure if he heard you correctly. You peered up from the clothing, squinting your eyes as you tried to adjust to the lighting. "You won't answer..."

"You... you think that I was... cheating?" He had heard you right, but that didn't make it any easier for him to process what you had said. Did you really think he was capable of such a thing? You sniffled and your bottom lip jutted out, he reached out to hold your face in his hands, brushing away the tears with his thumbs. "Baby doll, you are the most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on, the only girl I ever have and ever will love." Had he given you a reason to doubt him? Had he not told you that he loved you enough? Did he don't tell you enough just how gorgeous you were? He would gladly remind you every second of every day just to ease your worrying mind.

He ended up sitting with you in the closet for a bit, he sat against the wall with your head in his lap. His fingers trailed absentmindedly across your body as he listened to you speak. You told him about your insecurities, how you never felt like you were good enough for him, that you were always so scared that he'd find someone better someday. When you finished speaking he made sure to reassure you that you were beyond good enough for him, that you were too good for him. There would never be anyone better than you, it was impossible for there to be someone in the entire galaxy who was as amazing, beautiful, and genuinely perfect as you.

Atsushi

Atsushi was very protective of you, considering you were the only person in his life who has ever genuinely loved him, he didn't want to lose you or the affection you gave him. He was always scared that you would leave him or that someone would take you away. He thought that he was cursed, that everything good that ever came to him would eventually die or be destroyed. He was under the impression that he didn't deserve happiness, but once he found you, he was starting to believe that maybe it was possible, maybe for once in his life he was allowed to experience true joy. The protectiveness wasn't that bad, it was just him acting on his fears, and that was something that you had gotten used to.  He wasn't over bearing, he didn't keep you locked in the house or anything, he just always checked up on you, his voice was always filled with worry whenever he called, he just loved you so much, he wanted to be sure that you were okay, that you were going to be there when he came back home. You always reassured him that you would be right there waiting for him, and you could picture in your head his cheeks burning bright red whenever you said those simple words, reminding him that you loved him dearly and that you would never leave.

You were already awake, fresh out of the shower, padding around the kitchen as you made him breakfast. He always slept in a little later, his ability was tiring for him, and using it left him exhausted. He needed extra sleep to keep up with work, but you couldn't deny how precious he looked when he was sleeping, and you always got to witness him when he first woke. He would trudge into the kitchen, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, his mouth stretched in a wide "O" as he yawned, before finally opening his eyes and seeing you standing at the stove working on whatever food was on the stove. It happened as planned, a perfect daily happening that you looked forward to every morning. He wrapped his arms around your back, pressing a swift kiss to your neck before working to help you lay out the plates on the table. "You're going to be okay while I'm at work, right?" It was always the same question every morning, as if anything would make today any different from the days before.

"I'll be fine Atushi. You really need to stop worrying about me so much. It's much more dangerous for you out there than it is for me in here." You tried to calm his nerves, turning around to look at him. He was sitting at the table, his head in his hands, his mind filled with worry. You made your way over to where he was sitting and draped your arms over his shoulders, planting a small kiss to the top of his head, a small sigh of relief escaped his lips as you pulled away.

"Promise me, if anything happens, you'll call me. Okay?" He turned his head to look up at you, his face becoming flushed when he saw how close your face was to his own. You nodded, it was a quick jerky movement and the smile that replaced the small pout that he had been wearing only seconds before made your heart flutter. He was perfect in every way, and sometimes you wondered if you deserved such a man as him. You pecked the tip of his nose before heading back over to the stove to flip the pancakes. Today would be a good day, a normal day, just like any other day. He had nothing to worry about.

Atsushi got into the office and everyone could tell he was on edge. They were dealing with the Port Mafia, Akutagawa being the worst of them. The Port wanted to get their hands on him, and he was paranoid about how far they were willing to go to get to him. Every other worry he had about you previously seemed like nothing now, the Port Mafia was one of the biggest threats he had to deal with, and if there was anyone who would be able to get their hands on you, it would be them.

"Hey, come on... don't worry so much. She's always been safe before, she'll be fine today, and every day after." Dazai tried to console a panicking Atsushi. He was sitting at his desk, his pen tapping loudly against the hard wood, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip so hard that Dazai was sure that it would begin bleeding any second now.

"Before... before the Mafia was after me? That's what you mean, right?" Atsushi asked sarcastically, finally dropping his pen and spinning his chair around to face Dazai. "I...I can't lose her Dazai-san... I can't!" The tears threatened to spill over, his heart rate was rapid, his breath came out quickly and when he tried to inhale it sounded more like he was choking.

"They don't even know where she is, where you live. They know nothing. She's going to be alright." Dazai patted his back before turning away, leaving Atsushi alone to dwell on his fears. His head fell against the desk with a loud thud as the tears finally fell from his eyes.

You were sitting on the couch, flipping through tv stations trying to find something that could be used as background noise for your daily afternoon nap. You finally settled on the Weather Channel before getting comfortable enough to close your eyes and get some rest. You had just begun to fall into a peaceful slumber when you heard the front door knob being wiggled. You tried to brush it off as someone possibly coming to the wrong apartment door, just an accident, that's what it was. You tried to settle back down on the pillow, but then the knob was wiggled more violently. You sat straight up, grabbing your phone as you quietly moved off the couch and tiptoed into your bedroom. There was a pounding on the door, and as soon as you got to the bedroom you shut the door behind you and locked it. The violent pounding and the jerking of the doorknob seemed to go on endlessly. You were panicking as you held the phone against your chest, looking around your room to try to find somewhere that you could hide and call Atsushi.

The closet door was cracked open and you hurried over, grabbing a metal hanger from the rack and wrapping it around the handles on the inside. You tried to calm yourself as the sounds of the possible intruder trying to break their way into your home echoed throughout the house. Your hands were shaking and your palms were sweaty as you cowered in the far corner of the closet, trying to pull up Atsushi's number. You held the phone to your ear and took a shaky breath as the ringing resounded through the speaker. It only took one ring for him to answer, you never called him while he was working, so he knew there was something wrong.

"Y/N! Are you okay? What's wrong?" The panic in his voice was still nothing close to the panic you were feeling in that moment. You wanted nothing more than for him to be here with you, to let you know that everything was going to be okay.

"S-someone... they're... trying to g-get in..." You stuttered out in a shaky whisper, your cheeks were wet and stained with the tears that had fallen and were still falling. You heard the sound of Atsushi's phone being dropped, hitting the hard wood floors of the office with a loud thud as a large gush of wind whistled through the speakers.

You pulled your knees up to your chest and buried your face between them, trying to control your breathing as you listened out for the banging on the door. It had stopped completely, and you feared that maybe the person had finally made it in and was now looking for you. You tried to make out any sounds of footsteps or talking, but everything was silent. Everything seemed so still, it was eerie, and that scared you even more.

Atsushi was racing down the back alleys, hoping and praying that he would get to you in time. He should have trusted his gut feeling that he had this morning and just stayed home with you. The feeling that something bad would happen had lingered with him all through the night and all morning during breakfast, and he had been right. He was running at the speed of light, his body being propelled forward with the sheer force of anger and fear.

When he made it up to the apartment he saw that the door wasn't opened, and he didn't know if that made him feel better or worse. Would someone have shut the door after doing damage? He wasn't sure. Most movies he had seen had the door left open after a crime was committed, and all the cases he had worked were either outside or in warehouses, so he wasn't really sure what to think.

His hands were shaking as he reached out to grab the door knob, it was still locked. He saw the marks on the door though, signs of someone beating at it repeatedly, the wood was scuffed and in some places even chipped. Someone had really wanted to get in, but whoever it was either didn't have an ability, or just didn't want to attract attention and decided not to use it at all. He pulled out his keys and quickly unlocked the door, pushing it open slowly and peering around the room to see if you were anywhere close by.

The Weather Channel was on, but other than that, there was no sound coming from that room, or the house at all. It made his heart stop, did something actually happen to you? Did this person find some other point of entry? He quickly shut the door behind him and began looking around. He was scared to call out your name, fearful that if someone was still there they would definitely hurt you when they heard him. So he tiptoed, hoping that his shoes wouldn't be too loud against the hard wood floors, but at this point with the silence, everything seemed loud. Even the sound of his breathing seemed to be too loud in his ears.

When he was done checking over the main floor of the apartment he moved to the bedroom, wiggling the doorknob and finding that it had been locked. He knew that you were in there, whether you were alone or not was the main issue. He didn't want to wait to see if you would come open the door yourself, so he kicked it in. That's when he heard your loud scream from the closet. He rushed over and tried to pull the doors open, only to find that they too had been secured shut. "NO! Stay away from me! M-my boyfriend is a tiger! He'll kill you!" He could hear the desperation, the terror in your voice as you screamed. If you weren't so petrified, he might have possibly chuckled at your words, but now wasn't the time. He did take pride in the fact that you knew he would defend you, that he would always be there to keep you safe.

"It's me, angel. Please, open the door." His soft voice sounded heavenly to you. It was salvation, it was the voice of your savior. You quickly yanked the hanger away, and as soon as he knew he could get in he yanked the door open, dropping to the floor next to you and pulled you into his arms. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Y/N. I wasn't here, I'm so so sorry."

You both were crying at this point. Your forehead rested against his chest as you let your tears fall into his lap. His arms stayed wound tightly around you, afraid that you would run if he let you go. His tears fell like rain into your hair, his head was hung low as guilt and sham overcame him. "You needed me and I wasn't here. I promise, from now on, I will make sure nothing like this ever happens again. You don't need to be afraid anymore, angel." He murmured as he planted a garden of kisses along the top of your head. "Everything will be okay, I promise."

a/n: I'm sorry this took so long, I hope you're feeling a little better now. I hope I've fulfilled your request need and that you enjoy these scenarios. Please, don't hesitate to reach out to me if you need someone to talk to. <3

[soukokuwu]

hi rachel, i love ur work. i was wondering if u could pls write an angst to fluff scenario for ada dazai w a fem s/o. it’s always been a huge fear of mine to get cheated on because my parents never had the best relationship. i was wondering if u could write something about the reader talking w dazai about it and him initially thinking she doesn’t doesn’t trust him because of his past, but it actually being due to hers? sweet ending? tysm and i hope u have a good week !! much love

Dazai Osamu

➥ slight angst to fluff

➥ dazai x reader

➥ word count: 1.7k

➥ a/n: i’m sorry this took a long while, hopefully you’re still here, & i’m sorry to hear about that! my parents don’t have the best relationship either so i hope you’re doing okay 🤍

Your masks & mine

Insecurity kills all that is beautiful.

In this moment, you’ve never felt it to be more true. In this moment, as you look at the man you love, getting googly-eyes from the bartender. In this moment, you feel the fear, the anger, the upset, all creeping up on you. In this moment, even as the man you love has no one in his eyes but you.

It isn’t fair. This isn’t fair to him.

You try to talk yourself into concentrating on the conversation at hand. It’s something about Kunikida forcing Dazai to do things he didn’t feel like again. But even as you try your best, his voice sounds muffled at best. You continue to sip on your wine, your own thoughts eating you up.

Random memories flash across your mind.

That time when Dazai first brought you into the office and introduced you as his girlfriend. The look of shock on everyone’s faces you did not miss. They recovered quickly, but it still worried you.

That time when you were helping him with some paperwork, when he left to go to the restroom and only you and Atsushi were there. The weretiger had asked how you were doing, being with someone as suicidal as he. That wasn’t your concern though, because you already knew how Dazai felt about life and death. No. What concerned you was when Atsushi had so casually remarked on how astonishing it was that Dazai would even find a girlfriend, given his womanising nature.

A bandaged hand waves in front of your face.

Dazai asks if you’re alright, and what other answer is there than “I’m fine”? So you say it anyway, even if it’s an obvious lie.

And there it is again — Dazai believing you. Going back to the previous conversation. Not even so much as an “are you sure?” You know what he’s like — Kunikida and the others have always given his mind praise, even if his work attitude seems to be a total miss. They always mention how he’s able to see through people and their lies, how he’s always one step ahead of everyone else.

Then why? Why, if he truly was able to see through you — and you’re sure he can — why does he leave you be? Does he not care? Did he already know somehow and doesn’t bother to say a thing?

Images of your parents flash in your mind. The fake smiles, the happy charades, the “joyous” moments you thought you would all be able to recreate. You remember your mother smiling through the nights your father didn’t come back. You remember how tirelessly she worked for you, to support you. You remember her coming back after work, all despondent, but putting on an act the moment you came out of your room. But you knew, of course, that she was putting on a mask.

A mask — just like your father did.

When he came back smelling like women’s perfume, and your mother didn’t even question him. When he rarely came back at all sometimes, and she greeted him all the same. When he got angry and told her she didn’t even look like a woman to him anymore. But the moment you came out? There they were again — the masks. Your parents would hug each other and assure you everything was alright, giving each other pecks on the cheeks.

And just like your mother, you ignored the problem. Because you were afraid. Afraid of what might happen if it’s confronted.

But everyone breaks. And so did your family.

The masks never helped — they were but a hindrance. The masks they wore made them unhappy for years, unhappy ever since you were a kid. Those masks, those cursed masks, delayed their happiness.

A mask — just like Dazai always wears.

That thick comedic mask of his. Is there anything else he hides? He’s much more intelligent than you are; even if there is, you certainly wouldn’t be able to tell.

No, no, you convince yourself. He’s not anything like your father, he’s not wishy-washy, especially not when it comes to relationships. If he doesn’t like you, he won’t even bother. You’d be able to tell. So why? Why is the fear still here?

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Dazai’s voice snaps you out of your reverie. A worried expression is plastered on his face, and only then do you realise you’ve started tearing up. Your mind tries to think up excuses to mask your insecurities — and then you realise it’s you. You’re the one with a mask on this entire time. You’re the one who’s afraid to voice out your feelings. You’re the one not being fair by not being truthful with the man you love.

And you find this laughable. If you truly love him, why are you so afraid?

In a moment of panic, you run out the bar doors, never looking back. Not even when you hear his footsteps hurriedly chase after you, not even when you start to get drenched in the downpour, not even when you hear him yell out for you. You just know you hate yourself in this moment, and that you definitely don’t deserve someone like him. He’s always tried his best to be open with you about everything — his thoughts, his attempts. But you? You hide behind your walls, and then you even try to blame him for not attempting to break them down, when in reality, he’s just trying to give you space in case you feel uncomfortable. You know that. Why do you shield yourself so?

Dazai isn’t the despicable one here, so is it you?

You shut people away, then blame them for not coming close. You yell at the voices in your head to stop, but you’re the one making them. You blame yourself for everything, yet you still do nothing to change it. You —

An embrace from behind steals all the strength from your knees and you buckle to the ground, your wails — and your thoughts — being drowned out by the sound of the cars driving past. You choke out an apology to Dazai for being like this, and your heart aches when you realise he’s not even mad. The tone in his voice is just that of concern; his embrace nothing but warm and comforting. And as you force yourself to turn back and look into his hazelnut eyes, all you see is love.

“Let me take you back, okay?” Dazai tells you, his brown hair sticking to his face in this rain, his smile nothing but genuine as he looks down and waits for you to answer. In that moment, you know he’d do anything for you. Even if it is something this trivial, like squatting in this pouring rain and listening to you rant — he’d do it.

And as you nod, his smile gets a little wider and he presses his lips on your forehead.

“My precious belladonna.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You realise then, that your biggest insecurity is that Dazai would view you how you viewed yourself.

Your parents didn’t have the greatest relationship, and you blame yourself for it. And god knows why. But it makes you feel like you ruin relationships, that it’s because of you that they put on those masks in the first place. If you weren’t there, maybe they could’ve been happier sooner. But who can tell? Because what’s happened happened. And you still blame yourself.

But your fears prove redundant, because Dazai doesn’t feel the least bit repulsed that you are feeling insecure over the smallest (in your own words) things.

You spill the beans as soon as you’re both changed out into more comfortable, dry clothes. The heavy downpour caused a power outage, but neither of you cared. In the spill of the moonlight, Dazai holds you in his arms as he listens to you, in a way to shield you from how concerned he looks as he does. He did guess it has to do with your family, but never did he consider that you blame yourself this much.

He regrets not pursuing the matter, not asking you about it. He had assumed you needed time alone to get over it, that maybe it’s something personal you wanted to handle yourself. And so he tries his best to really listen to you tonight.

Dazai doesn’t understand, no matter how hard he tries. He doesn’t understand how it feels like to miss a happy family. His life has been enshrouded in darkness since he can remember. At least, until he joined the agency, where the light started peeking into his abyss. And it got even stronger the moment he met you.

There is one thing he understands, though.

When you say you ruin everything you touch. Every relationship, you ruin it. Even if you don’t mean to. And you lose people because you just aren’t enough. It reminds Dazai of someone who was once dear to him, but he shrugs the feeling away. Now, in this moment, he needs to be there for you, to be strong for you. And he smiles thinking of the reason — because he loves you.

This mask, the one he wears this time, the strong front he puts on — this one's for you.

“My lovely belladonna,” he whispers in your ear once you’re finished. You look up at him once more, and it’s like there’s even more love in his brown orbs. “I promise you, I will never do anything like that to you. I will always be honest with you, because I can’t imagine being with anyone else.”

It’s true, because you’re different from other people. Not that Dazai is going to pour his feelings out and explain it to you, because it doesn’t come naturally to him, but a fire is burning within him; a strong desire to make sure you know you’re loved, and that he’d always try to make you happy.

Your masks have finally come off, and Dazai can see the relief in your eyes as they do. He presses his forehead against yours, and gazes at you, praying that you can feel his sincerity in his words.

“I’m sure your parents never blamed you for anything, and that you’re actually the light of their life, the one regret they never had, because I feel the same,” he assures you, his voice low and steady. “I love you, and I will put everything I have into never letting you down, for the rest of my life.”

“The rest of your life?”

You can hardly believe it. Dazai hardly makes promises about anything, let alone anything to do with the future. And yet here he is, putting his all into making sure you wouldn’t feel like this anymore.

“The rest of my life.”

And he does.

tags: @yokelish @gogolparadise @fyowyn-writes

[ifellintothestyx]

I keep thinking about that moment when Akutagawa called Atsushi "stupid".

"Stupid" which could be changed to "Idiot" and then translated to "Baka" in the anime (I'm not sure. For the sake of this post, just think about it).

So, one thought led to another:

In the aftermath of the Dracula virus, the ex-infected Port Mafia members are resting in a large infirmary. It's open for the ADA to enter and leave freely, since the building was damaged in the battle and no one wanted to cover up the huge hole in the wall. Yosano was also needed there to help tend to the wounded and check the conditions of the cured mafiosos, and she refused to do so without a member of the Agency at her side.

Akutagawa was the first to wake, which was surprising since he was turned first. He felt well-rested, like he never had before. He was always pushing himself to the limits after all, just to gain his approval. He did not have time for relaxing activities, and the only reason he slept at all was because his sister was a terrifying force of nature when she was worried.

Gin! Akutagawa immediately sat up, concern for his sister bubbling up. Vague memories of her at his side surfaced, her face contorted unnaturally in a way that sent chills down his spine from just remembering. His sister wasn't supposed to look like that. She looked terrifying at work, but at home, where it was just the two of them, the soft kindness on her face spoke louder than her pretty voice.

He was ready to bolt up from the bed to see her, when a familiar boy stepped into view.

Jinko looked exhausted at first. There were bags under his eyes, and some of the naivety in them that Akutagawa first found revolting was gone. He looked like he'd been through hell. He's starting to look like me.

When their gazes met, the relief that spread across the younger's face surprised him. It was quickly covered up as Jinko walked forward, but he could still see traces of it in the golden hue of his eyes.

"You're awake," Jinko breathed.

"Naturally. What did you expect?" Akutagawa replied, raising an eyebrow.

Jinko looked annoyed at first, then amused, and then he snorted. "I'm-I'm not sure, but, uh, are you–pfft–raising an eyebrow right now?"

Akutagawa immediately activated Rashoumon, the black demonic cloth piercing the ground beside Jinko. To his satisfaction, a brief squeak left Jinko's mouth as he stepped away.

Didn't I give away my coat?

Akutagawa's eyes widened as he reached behind his shoulder to grasp at the familiar leather. He had only just realized the coat was there, the familiar weight of it as natural as... well, not breathing, but maybe the constant ache of his lungs.

Which, now that he thought about it, was gone.

His hand trailed down to his chest, gripping the front of his shirt as he took in the first deep breath of his life without feeling the rattle in his lungs and the strong urge to cough. The feeling was so foreign, so nice, but strange, all the same, and for one bizarre moment, he wished he had his sickness back. Then, he realized he didn't have to die.

He didn't have to die anymore.

He didn't have to leave Gin, and Higuchi, and Tachihara, and Hirotsu-san, and Chuuya-san.

He didn't have to die.

"The Dracula virus, when it revived you, seemed to have fixed your lung problem," Jinko explained as he took a seat next to him. "When Yosano-sensei healed you, the effects stayed."

Akutagawa couldn't speak for a shock-filled minute. When he recovered, he turned to Jinko.

"Where is my sister?" He asked sharply. Funny, how he hadn't noticed the change in his voice before.

He realized that Jinko probably didn't know he had a sister, and opened his mouth to clarify, when Jinko snapped his fingers.

"Oh! Gin-san! Don't worry, she's here. She's just asleep," he said in a reassuring tone. "She and the others are recovering quickly. Yosano-sensei said they might wake up later in the day."

The relief of knowing his sister and his friends are all safe drowned out the strong urge to ask him how he knew Gin was his sister.

They sat in silence for a moment. Akutagawa was never good at small talk, but he could feel the tension hanging between them. The last time they had seen each other, Akutagawa been speaking through the pain in his throat, telling him to save himself. Jinko had reached out to save him, a fruitless act, but the honest concern and fear for his life had left him feeling... somewhat satisfied. Because Jinko was good, and kind, and the light that so many others seemed to rally behind and follow, and it both pleased and scared him somehow that his kindness extended to him.

"You know," Jinko started, "your last words were pretty dramatic."

Akutagawa scowled at him. "What do you mean, dramatic?" He ignored the shakiness of Jinko's voice when he said last words.

"'Idiot. Hurry up and go'," Jinko recited. The words sounded as if they were spoken more than once. Akutagawa decided not to think about the implication behind that.

"Well, you are stupid," Akutagawa said bluntly. Jinko rolled his eyes.

"How many days has it been?" Akutagawa asked.

"Three days since the last fight," Jinko answered. "Unfortunately, Fuck-you—I mean, Fukuchi escaped, but now that the Hunting Dogs are helping us, we might be able to corner him soon."

Discontentment, frustration, and anger rose up within him. That bastard isn't dead yet? And why were those Hunting Dogs helping them?

"To be honest, they aren't so bad," Jinko said. "They were just doing their jobs, after all, and Tecchou-san and Teruko-san were actually pretty nice, if you ignore Teruko-san's ranting about how she'll rip out the tendons of the rest of the Decay of Angels. Jouno-san, though, he apologized once, to both Yosano and Kunikida, then decided he was too good for any of us to speak with him. Only Dazai-san seemed to be the one getting through to him, honestly."

Tecchou? Teruko? Jouno? Who the hell were they?

"Dazai-san is back?" Akutagawa asked, shocked. He decided to ask about the other three later.

"Yes. His charges were mysteriously dropped, and now he's been pestering Jouno-san about the Hunting Dogs' methods for an hour now. Tecchou-san says he's impressed at how Jouno-san managed to keep himself from shooting him." Jinko sighed in a world-weary way.

After a long silence, Jinko spoke up again. "My name is Nakajima Atsushi."

Akutagawa blinked. "You have an actual name?"

Jinko looked irritated. "Of course I have an actual name! Did you really think I was named Jinko at the orphanage?!"

Akutagawa nodded. "Fine. You have a name. But, unless you defeat me in our battle a few months from now, I will refer to you as Jinko."

"Don't."

"Nakajinko Atsushi, then."

"I–No!"

Just then, a hilarious thought crossed Akutagawa's mind.

"Bakajinko Atsushi."

"I'm going to kill you."

"Been there, done that."

[smoochi-dazai]

Hello there, can you do headcanons on how Atsushi, Dazai, Kunikida and Chuuya would react if they found out their fem s/o could sing opera? Like she’s not a professional, but she is self taught and has a powerful soprano voice and she sings Carmen’s Habanera like an angel basically? And they find out through her singing in the shower, through karaoke, etc. If you want to do this imagine thank you! 🙏💕🌹🍷✨

✿ “  Love is a rebellious bird ” ✿

—> Bungo Stray Dogs, Atsushi, Dazai, Kunikida, Chūya + PM Dazai | Reader

—> Sweet | hcs

—> Description | Atsushi, Dazai, Kunikida and Chūya react to a s/o who’s a talented, self taught opera singer. 

+ I’m not sure how this turned out, sorry for taking so long <3 This is my first time writing for Atsushi, Kunikida and Chuya so i was super worried. TwT

Nakajima Atsushi 

✿ Atsushi along with his s/o lived together, similar to Kyōka - Dazai suddenly roomed these two together with some kind of scheme. Using a cover up of keeping her safe, even though the s/o was plenty able to protect herself.

✿ The least Dazai expected was for these two not to start dating. It had been a couple months time before they even developed some feelings, but the love was intoxicating the air. 

✿ Eventually becoming more affectionate publicly, small kisses on the cheek, hand holding- it was all some cute puppy love. Forming into something more genuine.

✿ While his s/o were roomed together with him, it wasn't uncommon for Atsushi to be out of the house at work. Or the other way around while his s/o still searched for a job.

✿  Thankfully Atsushi recommended to be an assistant at the ADA, if his s/o had no interest in all the violence and fighting as a proper member. 

✿ The day Atsushi was first introduced to his s/o’s powerful voice for singing was while she was in the shower.

✿ He had towels for s/o and a spare change of fresh new clothes, but the poor boy didn’t want to interrupt their singing. opening the door ever so slightly, he put the clothes inside then shut the door again. No intension on invading his s/o’s privacy.

✿ Atsushi would mostly likely sit outside the door to listen to his s/o’s singing. It captured his heart honestly, poor boy was speechless. 

✿ Never had he heard such a strong voice, he saw you as such a beautiful singer, let alone someone who slept right next to him ?! he couldn’t believe his ears.

✿ Poor boy ends up being hit by the door when his s/o came out of the bathroom, now changed in light clothes and a towel over their shoulders that had been partially dampened..

✿ Atsushi stared at his s/o in awe. Unable to say a word he just stares at s/o for an uncomfortable amount of time. 

✿ Once Atsushi snaps out of it, he’s complimenting his s/o all day. 

✿ When I say all day, I mean all day.

✿ Atsushi had no idea you were capable of something so, amazing. He knew you were talented, but never grasped the fact you could control your voice for opera?!

✿ He wont force you to sing for him or anything, but every once in a while he may ask. 

✿ Overall, Atsushi was in love with the singing. He wouldn't question much, he’d be too busy complimenting it all. 

Dazai Osamu

✿ These two first met at the cafe beneath the ADA’s head office. 

✿ While the others were screaming at each other over work, Dazai left for some peace and quiet. The least he was expecting was a new waitress coming to his table with the cutest little smile.

✿ Dazai would do his typical flirts, asking to commit a lovers suicide.

✿ Each time he was declined, for obvious reasons haha.

✿ Visit upon visit, Dazai would show up much more frequently then the rest of his friends in the ada.

✿ They started to be on a first name basis which was a surprise, because even the ADA members call him by his surname.

✿ The day Dazai visited and found the cafe trashed up because of a group of thugs? he was beyond upset. s/o was knocked out cold on the ground, while the head of the cafe was clenching onto his hand that bled. 

✿ After the ada caught the ones behind the attack and taught them a lesson, Dazai offered to take care of s/o at his place. She meekly accepted his offer.

✿ Being around someone more casual was refreshing and new, the rest of the people he knew were always work busy and overall just rude to him. Stick in the muds as he’d put it. 

✿ S/o was gentle with him, always worried if he got injured- it was odd. 

✿ At first he began rejecting her, but she’d still come to his place with groceries and cook for him.

✿ Falling her her more and more, Dazai joked less about his suicidal tendencies. Becoming more serious with his issues, he’d vent to s/o for relief. Even when she didn’t say anything in return, it was still comforting. 

✿ Eventually these two started dating, Dazais flirtatious habits died off and he was always focused on his s/o. Some may say he was a bit obsessive, but Dazai was just afraid he’d lose what made him want to live.

✿ Their first date was simple, going out to town and just walking together hand in hand. They ate together, shopped a little- that was until he felt his s/o insist on pulling his arm, pointing at a building across the street. 

✿ Dazai thought his s/o was pointing in the direction of a pathway leading to a river.

✿ “ You want to commit a lovers suicide in the river? “ I never said he completely got rid of the jokes- even if they hold a little truth. 

✿ “ No moron! Karaoke is tonight !! “

✿  “ oh. “

✿    Pouting, his s/o dragged him to the building. Not minding that they were alone, she just wanted an excuse to sing for her lover. 

✿ Thats the night she first sung for Dazai- he wasn’t aware of her talent in singing before-hand so this man was in pure awe.

✿ Dazai leaned back in his chair, eyes never once leaving his s/o’s form when she sung to him. A smile formed on his features uncontrollably, the singing wasn’t any singing of a casual for fun. It was Opera- 

✿ He constantly wanted to speak up and say how amazing his s/o was, but stayed respectful. keeping his mouth quiet.

✿  Afterwards, Dazai showers his s/o in love. Kisses, words- you name it. 

✿ “ Your voice was so powerful, ah~ I could die! “

✿ Dazai claims that if it were to continue he may faint from the beauty, saying his s/o was an angel sent from above to take care of him.

✿ His s/o better be prepared- because the next day she goes to work. all the ada detectives were sitting down like usual, but that's when Dazai takes it upon himself to drag s/o onto his lap and start bragging about her. 

✿ Dazai tries to make her sing again, but the poor girl is embarrassed looking down at her lap.

✿ Overall this boy is all over his s/o, bragging to the world that she is talented as hell. Will often tease her for blushing when he asks her to sing for him. 

Kunikida Doppo

✿ This man didn’t plan on meeting the woman of his dreams for another 3-5 years as he stated many times, which would then lead to marriage. 

✿ But when you became an assistant at the ADA he couldn't keep his eyes off you, always coming with excuses as to why he’d stare.

✿ Dazai constantly teased him over this-

✿ “ Is it true? Kunikida has the hots for our new assistant?~ “ Dazai teases, only to be tossed away. 

✿ “ I am only keeping an eye for her for the safety of our office, plus she may need guidance around the office. “

✿ “ Sureee.. “

✿ He never planned on becoming super close to the new assistant, but the way she smiled at him always kept his heart fluttering. The determination held in her eyes whenever he gave advise, it was something he appreciated. 

✿ Unlike Dazai, she wasn't always on her ass. The potential love of his life was always on her feet, keeping her work a priority. 

✿ It got to the point, she was kunikidas go-to person for assistance. Need coffee? she’d get it for him, need to shut up Dazai? he is already out the window. She’d never failed to meet his expectations, a true blessing. Even helping his with paperwork became a regular whenever he was fatigued. 

✿ He never involved himself with romance, especially around work. But he couldn’t help but fall for you as time went by, dazai pointing it out made it more obvious to himself. he was changing because of his s/o.

✿ It takes a couple years to actually get together, this man is always busy with his work and ideals. So even though it takes so long, id say its worth it. He deeply cares for his s/o even if he isnt always fun and romantic- 

✿ The first time he hears his s/o sing was when they were off work for once, just resting at home on the couch. However, kunikida still insisted on working from home. 

✿ His s/o had to convince him to leave.

✿ “ Can you at least listen to me sing? I’ve been practicing... i thought you’d want to listen. “ 

✿ Sing? this was the first time he heard of his s/o singing. He never wrote that down, time to add it to the list of talents he figures out his s/o has.

✿ He was convinced to listen to one song, thankfully. So his s/o dragged him to the living room, siting him down as she sat in front of him. 

✿ At the start, he never once put his notebook down. Writing random jots in there about she could only assume- it was about her. 

✿ So while singing, she carefully takes the book from his hand, catching Kunikidas attention. 

✿ After the singing, Kunikida was almost in tears- nowhere in his notebook did it say his girlfriend would be this talented. 

✿ He’d grab her shoulders, staring eye to eye with her. It was an intense stare only to be glossy, tearing up. Explaining how that was so beautiful. 

✿ Overall, Kunikida is gushing over the beauty. There will be a lot of explaining as to how his s/o is perfect in his eyes. 

Chūya Nakahara 

✿ Chuya first met his s/o through the Mafia, s/o weren’t all that special. Just another person beneath him in terms of rank, he didn’t know much about them honestly.

✿ It wasn’t til he ran into his future s/o during a meeting with fellow executives and their leader, Mori. 

✿ S/O was playing with Elise on the opposite side of the room, Chuya was much more focused on Mori for obvious reasons at first. But then his ears pick up on s/o braiding Elise hair and humming for her. 

✿ Honestly it was pretty sweet, s/o was a beauty he’d admit. 

✿ Suddenly, Mori called s/o over. Advising her to follow Chuya on a mission to retrieve information from a colleague in question. 

✿ At first Chuya would question why she of all people would be sent with him, but that look in her eyes gave it away. S/O wasn’t any normal mafia member, her dull eyes still held a sparkle. Serious about their mission.

✿ Something about it was intimidating? 

✿ Its never right to judge a book by its cover, Chuya knew that. But he still couldnt grasp that someone as motherly as the s/o was capable of hurting even a fly.

✿ S/o was there to keep him under control, Mori was all too aware of Chuyas hot-headed approach to issues. But Chuya still was trustworthy enough.

✿ It became a regular for s/o to join Chuya on jobs.

✿ Turns out she was born without any kind of agility. She was the most human you could get, but that didn’t stop him from admiring her. She seemed like a mystery at first.

✿ S/O was capable of high levels of martial arts, even rivalling him. Though Chuya still would have the upper hand, just from having a little more experience in the mafia. 

✿ s/o would lure people in with her singing, then he’d deal with them.

✿ S/O gained the nickname ‘ Siren ‘ for her beautiful vocals, while deadly even without Chuya at her side.

✿ After almost a year working together, Chuya gained feelings for the women at his side. the feelings were mutual, s/o and Chuya were just too caught up in work to confess. 

✿ He would compliment s/o for a job well done, her singing was truthfully very alluring. 

✿ It was only recently where he found her on an empty bridge in Yokohama. 

✿ She seemed to be preparing to sing on her own, maybe practicing for future missions. If she sung on the streets she’d probably make more money then the mafia gave her. 

✿ Chuya kept himself hidden away in the shadows of night, watching his s/o who was doing small exercises for her vocals.

✿ S/O began to sing opera, which was new to him. Shutting his eyes, Chuya couldnt help but smile. He never saw himself dating such a talented young women. Someone to call his own. 

✿ Even when he’d murder someone before her eyes, she never once seemed disgusted. Never found herself question his motives, not even tease him for his outbursts. 

✿ He adored his s/o through in through. 

✿ When his s/o finishes singing, he’d finally reveal himself. out of the blue, his s/o would be pulled into a hug.

✿ “ That was beautiful, who knew i’d date someone so damn talented. Holy shit. “

✿ Chuya wouldn't bombard his s/o in compliments like others, it would be more shown through actions. A kiss on the head with his arms wrapped around her waist. 

✿ Chuya would be happy, alone on the bridge with s/o.

✿ Overall this man would get a little distracted on missions because of that beautiful voice, may have to snap him out of it during serious times. Be prepared for hugs, and many pecks on the lips. 

Bonus !! Port Mafia Dazai 

✿ Dazai first met his S/O in Lupins bar, one night where he went to meet with  Odasaku for a couple drinks. He heard a women in the opposite corner of the bar humming to herself. 

✿ Having nothing to do with her, the smaller hums were relaxing to just think during before he made his leave.

✿ Frequent visits later- Dazai found himself showing up for her, more then the drinks. Often alone, he’d just come to listen to the women hum, or even sing sometimes. 

✿ She rarely properly sung in order to leave the peace at the bar serene. Having no interest in making someone uncomfortable.

✿ One day he visited and finally spoke to her, even praising her just for a mere tune that created a beautiful atmosphere in a normally gloom bar.

✿ Days on end, Dazai would insist on her singing for him. Free time? he’d be spending that time at the bar. He was often curious as to why the talented women was stuck at a cheap bar like Lupins. Yet, she never seemed to answer his question. So he left it be. 

✿ That’s how they end up getting closer and started dating. Visiting almost everyday to see one another- The women never questioned his often dull expression as days pass by. 

✿ Who knew she had been the single thing keeping him to hold some faith in humanity, or even himself. 

✿ As the visits became daily and they started dating, she often would leave the bar and sing for Dazai outdoors. It allowed her to use all her vocals, no matter how loud she may be. 

✿ Hums, small tunes, singing then- Opera. Something she always found interest in. Feeling confident to sing for Dazai after really knowing each other.

✿ The first time his S/O grabs his hand before he even sat himself down, he knew something was up. Rather it was good or bad had been the real question.

✿ “ I wanted to try something new for you “

✿ Dazai had no idea what he was instore for, but accepted it anyways. Sitting himself on the ground crisscross. 

✿ That was the first time she had sung an Opera for him. It was purely her voice, no instruments in the background or some music video online. It was live, right in front of his eyes. 

✿ Boy was this mafia executive in Awe. His S/O was beautiful, and not just that. She was talented !! 

✿ Dazai being in the mafia hasn’t any experience in the world of singing, yes he often would hum random tunes through boredom. But her voice was so strong, and held control throughout the whole performance. 

✿ Once his S/O finished singing, Dazai was speechless. Eyes sparkling like a child as he stands up and grasps her hands. There was hardly space in between them, but he pays no attention towards that. 

✿ “ That was outstanding !! How’d you do that ?? “

✿ Honestly he didn’t give her time to answer his question, before asking a million more. Dazai was just in love with her voice, even more than before. It was stronger then any person he’s fought against. How could someone be so talented and it not be an ability or something?

✿  Overall this boy is in shock, he’s absolutely in love with the singing and insists on his s/o doing it more for him on the days off work.