#Kaz x gn reader

[liliumsabyss]

In The Small Moments

Part 1, Pt 2, Pt 3, Pt 4, Pt 5,

Kaz Brekker x Gn Reader

Summary: Moulin Rouge/Satine Inspired!Reader and Kaz go undercover at a ball only for things to go terribly wrong.

Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48845809/chapters/123220936

Word Count: 5.16K

Tw: Angst and Fluff, Swearing, Mentions of Sex, Mentions of Sex Work, No Smut, Mentions of Death, Forced Marriage, Manipulation, PTSD, reader called handsome but could be interrupted as in the old timey gender neutral way, maybe OOC Kaz Brekker, and Pekka Rollins

A/n: This is inspired by Moulin Rouge the musical both adaptations and the place. I imagine the characters to be more like 25 in this.

Early in the morning of Ketterdam fog hung over the streets, while most towns would be asleep, Ketterdam never slept. There was always laughing from a bar, hushed whispers from allies, the drunken shouts of yells, screams of a not so lucky passerbye, honey sweet calls from brothels, that was the barrel, that was the life you knew. You were awake at your desk running through the plans that a certain man had given you. The certain man who was feared by many, he had created numerous enemies yet remained in power, that man being the bastard of the Barrel, Kaz Brekker. And unfortunately for you the man your heart belonged to. You hadn’t quite been a dregger or a crow more like a person of select skills for even selector hire or in other words you sometimes applied these skills but only for Kaz Brekker. Not to say you didn’t get along with the crows, in fact you got along amazingly. They quite enjoyed your “refreshing” presence as they stated, the best term to explain your relation would be friends of some sort.

Otherwise you worked as a bartender and occasional waiter when it got crowded in the Crow Club. It wasn't anything much, however you always noticed a few extra gold coins that appeared in your pocket on payday. Many days after the Crow Club closed for the night or at that point what had been very early morning, it lay empty, Kaz’s companions off somewhere leaving the two of you in amicable silence as he slowly sipped on the strongest liquor on the shelf while you did whatever cleaning up needed to be done, many of times conversations would eventually spur. And then he found out about your particular skill set slowly once on a busy night you were waiting tables when a customer was getting a little too handsy with you after you repeatedly told him to stop Kaz was about to intervene only to see you grab the customers arm twisting it behind his body and smashing his head into the hard wooden edge of the gambling table breaking his nose. Most of the crowd at the table turned stunned, you quickly dropped the stuff off, gave a quick bow in apologies as you left, Kaz stood slightly impressed. Another time you had forgotten your key to open the club before the sun had even come up, you squatted down so you were eye level with the lock, quickly you rummaged through the pockets of your heavy woollen coat finding a random thin hooped earring you picked up on the street and a paperclip you quickly unbent the paperclip and pulled the thin hool straight as well little did you know Kaz was approaching when he spotted you crouched at the door however he saw you pull out the two random objects to his own confusion as you pushed them into the locks fiddling with the tumblers till you heard a click, you stood up and to the others shock opened the door, and then walked in. The third time he was talking to Jesper after the crow club had closed for the night and not bothering to care whether you were there. Jesper was discussing how the Landercrofts, a very wealthy family that were the head of one of the gangs, were having their annual ball in which the crows were planning to rob their vault during the party. Jesper had gotten his hands on false invitations and was stating how the dress code was black and white when you spoke up stating that the dress code this year was red, the black and white dress code was a rumour to set apart who had gotten invited and who was sneaking in. When Kaz and Jesper inquired into where you had gotten that information you explained how your connections made you quite knowledgeable of the barrel and many drunks let things slip. And the fourth time, was when you were carrying a glass from a table once the club was closed when you tripped the glass shattering at your feet Kaz who was by you when you tripped at the same time as you quickly belt down to pick up the glass out of an instinct. You both immediately reached for the largest piece when your hand brushed against his glove and he flinched only he really didn't. It was a slight twinge but less than usual so he tried it out again prying the glass out of your hands and once again he was a little nerved but better than he had with pretty much anyone else. So Kaz could only see one thing to do with your talents and would hire you on the occasion he saw fit which was becoming more and more often. Tonight was the ball that the crows had prepared for months for and the one in which you provided consistent information for, Kaz only saw it fit as you would be one of the ones to directly infiltrate the ball.

Hours passed by as you ran through the plans over and over again before you knew it, it was evening just a few hours before the ball. You frantically got ready scolding yourself for being so careless with watching the time. You grabbed the blood red outfit that laid on your bed for the past day delivered personally by Kaz. The brunette male had also delivered the red mask that was decorated in black markings intricately painted and sculpted; mixed with the outfit there was no way that Kaz paid for it just for you for this one event, someone had to owe him a debt for this. You quickly got yourself ready like you had used to, it had been a long time since you wore anything like this and you were glad for it. A sharp knock came from your door as you scrambled stuffing any possible tools you’d need into various hidden pockets. Opening the old door which let out an unpleasant creak revealed Kaz in a black and red suit to match your outfit.

“ Good your ready we need to go” Kaz let out curtly which was not what he wanted to say yet it was all that he could let out in the cold streets of Ketterdam where anyone could hear anything and take things the wrong way but for what he was going to say they surely would have took it the correct way. You gave a swift nod, looking behind him to see a black horse drawn carriage, Nina and Jesper at the driver's seat waiting impatiently for you two to climb into the back.

“ I thought Inej and Jesper were also supposed to be going in with us?” You questioned, confused at Inej’s lack of presence and Jesper at the reins in a not ball ready outfit.

“ They will be going in just not with, now if we want to be on time we must move.” Kaz responded as he turned walking away climbing into the back of the carriage you followed in tow closing the door as you entered.

Sitting on the plush cushions you ran your hand against the seat and the wooden sill that elegantly framed the window, you breathed in the stale air of the carriage the feeling, the smell had all been so familiar to all those days and nights it was honestly shocking you could forget it for this long. Kaz eyed you silently, watching your face twinge in familiarity however that look was soon gone in your eyes and an eerie tint of hatred flickered. For the rest of the ride you just peered out the window mindlessly. The lights from the mansion shimmered as you approached in your carriage many other carriages also appeared to be dropping guests off. The carriage slowly stopped to a stuttering halt pausing as the carriage rocked slightly giving away that either Jesper or Nina had gotten off their seats. The carriage door swung open, Nina holding it wide open. You put the mask on quickly looking over to Kaz who had done the same, his mask being black decorated with red instead, the inverse of yours. The man swiftly climbed out of the carriage waiting with his hand outreached ready to help you out of it as the carriage hobbled. Nina eyed the two of you in surprise as you took his hand carefully stepping down the wobbling carriage, lights poured carefully out of the manor barley illuminating the pathways that led to the large doors that were cracked and every so often would open letting light flood onto the party goers entering the masquerade. Kaz left his elbow out as you tucked your arm into it carefully so as not to look suspicious to other attendees. The brunette male held the invitations in his opposite hand, grasping them tightly. Stiffly walking up to the doors large men who had large swords sheathed in leather at their sides; ready to be pulled out against any threat to the people of the manor. The guards had displeased faces as they stood tall, intimidating, snatching invitations out of the hands of masked figures. Shortly You and Kaz stood before a guard who stood with her arms crossed and the corner of her lips pulled into a tight frown. Kaz stared at her equal in expression for a long couple of seconds before swiftly putting his arm up the two pale beige invitations decorated in gold swirls with hints of red trickled on them the women to the invitations inspecting them carefully front and back before taking out a wooden plank the split into two three quarters of the way she wedged one of the invitations between the the slit in the plank harshly squeezing it together giving it back to Kaz’s outstretched hand revealing it to have a red seal marking the paper, the guard did the same to the other begrudgingly knocking on the large painted metal and wood doors causing them to slowly open. You and the stiff brunette behind you slipped through into the manor. Laughter and music filled the air swirling around the stuffy air of the large ballroom, gowns splaying out from being turned by their suit and gown clad partners. Standing at the top of the marble stairs looking down upon the people down below, the shoulder that pressed against you that was tensed loosened slightly with a relieved breath. Turning your head to look at Kaz he slanted his head to you in return giving a sharp nod before you both took equally swift steps toward the stairs before descending into the madness of the ballroom. Kaz took a step away from the stairs and away from you his red gloved hand offering his hand with his other arm plastered behind him only then did you noticed the absence of his cane, you gave him a confused look to which he took a step to you whispering below his breath.

“ We cannot afford to look suspicious.” Kaz said lowly pulling up the leg of his suit revealing a slight gleam of metal which appeared to be a brace only letting it fall quickly before taking a step back to once again offer his hand. People whirled around behind him but you could only see him under the warm chandelier light that illuminated the marble floor and sparkling cloth.

“ Of course” You replied fondly to both the gesture and his comment, gently taking his hand taking several steps out onto the floor before turning toward each other. The song that had been playing had finished partners taking a step back bowing or curtsying to the other. The music picked up again with a medium pace waltz, guests flocking toward each other for the dance.

“ Do you want to lead or shall I?” The brunette in front of you commented fidgeting stiffly once again.

“ Eh doesn’t matter to me, dealer's choice.” You shrugged in response figuring that while Kaz offered he probably only knew one of those options if even considering his aversion toward contact. Kaz took a step closer lifting your hand which still lightly remained in his to his shoulders which he set on his ridged boney shoulder his hand reached for your side placing it gently and you grabbed his other hand raising it up holding it slightly below your shoulder as well as out. Kaz moved his foot toward yours, yours moving back in response to the waltzing causing a game of call and response in your movements. Your partner moved his head closer to the side of yours leaning in his mouth by your ear, you could feel a hot breath tickling your ear making a slight tinge of fluster.

“ We need to distract the Landercrofts, Alinda Landercroft and Jerad Landercoft are over by there by the fourth column from the window,” Kaz whispered carefully stopping midway to turn you a subtle gesture you understood, getting a flash of the pale couple in their 50’s, Alinda Landercoft wore a deep red chiffon and miniver gown that was adorned with ruffles while Jerad Landercroft wore a black suit with a red suit vest that matched the same shade of red of his wife, a large top hat stood on his head causing his short grey hair to sprawl out.

“ Their son Devlin is over there succumbing to his seduction activities.” The brunette gestured with his head to the blonde haired male around your age. He was surrounded by a couple of people of all genders who were fawning over him, him just giving a lazy suggestive smile to each of them. He wore a loose black top that cut low into his chest, a red vest tightened to his figure and black dress pants that were tight around his waist leaving little to the imagination a seemingly common theme with his outfit.

“ Once this song ends we should make discussion with Alinda Landercroft and her husband, their son seems busy enough.” Kaz said vaguely referring to his flirting where now a short haired person in a dress that had a very low bust and corset that pushed their chest up, rubbed said chest against his arm as you groaned in disgust.

And as the song ended the two of you briskly walked toward the older-ish couple who were laughing as you approached. You stopped before the couple you and Kaz bowing your heads slightly as the Landercroft’s looked at you in curiosity.

“ Hello Mr. Landercroft, Mrs. Landercroft,-” Kaz started as you internally sighed at his bluntness that was going to get you guys caught before you decided to interrupt him.

“ Mr Landercroft, Mrs Landercroft! Truly this gala is lovely, every year you never fail to impress me or my husband!” You exclaim in delight to them touching Kaz’s arm affectionately at the term “husband” as the brunette give you a wild slightly disturbed look at your behaviour to which you just gave him a slight unnoticeable jab to the ribs.

“ Oh well thank you my dear! But may I be reminded of who you are? My memory isn't as sharp as it used to be.” Mrs. Landercroft said jokingly as you all(except for Kaz) let out a slight chuckle at her statement.

“ Of course don’t worry I get it, I am (F/n) Casspian and this is my wonderful husband Kazmere Casspian. Between you and me he’s not much of a talker unless it comes down to business.” You tell them fake whispering the last part to Mrs. Landercroft in which she responded with a hearty laugh as Kaz rolled his eyes in response but slightly thankful you’d be handling the small talk especially with how much of a natural you were at this.

“ Same with mine dear!” She laughed out as her husband grumbled beside her as you joined her laughter faking it.

“ Now what did you say you did again?” She “asked” or in the world of the rich she was demanding you explain how you got into the party as people these rich rarely personally invite people more so often leaving it to trusted members of the household to invite people of popularity, opportunity, or influence.

“ The Casspians own that metal company. I believe I recently heard about it from an associate, I hear that it's becoming very influential.” Mr. Landercroft spoke up in a very “knowledgeable” tone which would have been knowledgeable except for the fact that none of it was true nor was it planted information just the older man trying to show off. Both you and and the brunette next to you turned your heads slightly making eye contact with a look of confusion at what bullshit this man was spewing to which you both just shrugged your shoulders slightly turning your attention back to the couple.

“ Yes and we were hoping to establish some sort of arrangement between our company and yours.” The brunette says to the elderly couple to which both looked shocked to see him speaking however you internally smiled smug at the distraction this provided the others who should be close to the vault in the eastern wing of the manor.

“ That would be great, son!” Mr. Landercroft said walking over clapping Kaz on the back was quite hard as Kaz flinched away from the contact, inching closer to you pressing tightly against your arm as you felt his arm trembling slightly against yours. You carefully snaked your hand towards his tightly clenched fist nudging it with your pinky in a silent ask. His hand slacked open in response as your hand slid into his carefully rubbing circles onto the back of his hand as his shaking slowly started to decrease as the older man in front of you ran his mouth off about his company.

“ Well son why don’t we all head to my office to hash out the details.” Mr. Landercroft stated hearty as he laughed, putting out his arm for his wife. You looked as Kaz grimacing when the others were not looking, pointing your head towards Devlin who was still wrapped up “entertaining” the people around him. The brunette nodded in understanding at your subtle gesture.

“ Mr Landercroft I would love to join however I must leave my husband up to this, an old acquaintance of mine appears to be here and I’ve never been good at business.” You speak in fake regret towards the couple furrowing your eyebrows together and letting out a tight lipped smile. The couple nodded in understanding of your statement. You turned to Kaz one of your hands still holding his slightly trembling one, you carefully grabbed his other hand with your free one looking at him for any resistance to which you received none you gently raised both his towards each other raising them to your mouth as you bowed your head maintaining eye contact with him lightly brushing your lips against his gloved hands the thick cotton rough under your lips as you placed a soft kiss on them. Kaz's eyes only widened slightly as the corners of his lips threatened to twitch into a warm small smile so faintly you may not have even realised nothing like his manic and greedy smile but a smile that held whatever pieces of his heart had been left. And so you let him go which caused a faint tug at your own heart as you watched him leave with the couple, your eyes trailing him as much as you could before he completely disappeared through the crowd. You turned back to the people whirling in endless mindless circles in lavish gowns and suits. This is the life they know and for most of them all they’ve known but it was also a life you knew, you knew it in the twisted behind closed doors way. And so you skimmed the crowd following it all the way to the blonde man who leaned in close to one of the people that was crowded around him a inch distance from their face with a smirk on his. You made up your mind and decided you would distract him yourself to avoid suspicion of just standing in the open unmoving, unamused. So you walk up to the male swaying your hips slightly, an innocent smile that holds a slight suggestiveness undertone to it cringing internally. The blonde's eyes turned wide for a second before his entire face turned into a smirk as he stopped leaning against the pillar standing straight up, his arms still crossed.

“ Well hello,” Devlin stated seductively(?), more like an attempt to be seductive to which you internally groaned with disgust. But regardless of how cringe worthy it felt you went along with it looking way in fake flusteredness.

“ Hello,” You replied meekly, crying internally at how awful the situation was. The blonde just continued to smirk as he took a step towards you.

“ Well what caused you to wander over here love.” The man replied teasingly and unfortunately for him horribly unattractive. And so your fake waltz began with your “subtle flirting” and his prowling responses. Many of the people who had been fawning over him had walked away with their noses high in the air, scoffing, at your presence it certainly hadn’t been the first time you experienced this but hopefully would be the last. And so your little dance began with slight touches, suggestive innocent sentences, and so on, all part of your careful scheme of distraction. And oh how you dreaded it weaving a web around the playboy who only expected you to be an innocent party-goer who had been entranced by him not a thief who took the role upon themself to protect the man and friends they had come to adore.

“ Well darling how about we head to somewhere more private.” The blonde said his voice dropping as he pressed his mouth against your ear, you having to clench your fingernails into your palm to resist the urge to push him away. But of course you had a role to play and so you’d play it. Your lips turned into a slight pout as you spoke up.

“ Well could we have one dance…first?” You trailed off hugging his arm, an obnoxious move but one that charmed him and most likely only his lips turned into a gentle smile.

“ Why of course.” He responded lightly as he reached his out for yours ready for you to grasp it. You of course did as the two of you walked out into the centre which had just concluded the previous dance, some couples fled to the side, some stayed and some joined. All on the floor stayed perfectly still as they were in their spots until the musicians started to play. It was a medium paced dance and one you knew well. You sighed in relief at the fact you knew the dance and one that you knew well but not only that the dance was one in which you switched partners for a large portion of it in the middle meaning you could get a break from Devlin, what a relief that would be. Your whirling and steps began him sweeping you through the other couples narrowly missing one another, Devlin holding you to him as tight as he possibly could. You on the other hand were mentally counting down the seconds till you would get to switch partners. Then finally what felt like forever you spun away only to be caught by what you’d hoped was anyone better than him. You were wrong. The man in front of you had his hair gelled matching his thick beard and moustache, his eyes stared coldly into you, a smirk upon his lips. You knew the man, you knew him very well and you hated him, you hated him for yourself, for the people he’s hurt, and for Kaz. But there he was in front of you smirking your dance partner, any sliver of hope you’d had. He didn't recognize you went out the window when you came face to face with him.

“ Rollins.” You spat at him, your face seething with anger.

“ (Y/n)” He responded back with that stupid greedy smirk on his face causing you to roll your eyes.

“ You are looking as great as ever, tell me have you taken a visit back yet since your little runaway stunt.” He commented, the words rolling off his tongue in a fake syrupy sweetness. You gritted your teeth together as you stared at his cold gaze with one equally of coldness, possibly even more.

“ Do not even speak of that to me.” You hissed at him hating how one of his hands rested on your waist and the other touching your hand, but most of all you hated how you had to continue this charade with the man, the man that the person you cared for had despised.

“ Oh you mean the Red Windmill or Ryker Knox because both are missing their shining diamond terribly,” He started your face twisting briefly into horror before going back to being enraged “ You know nobody would have ever thought you would have run away from the man much less to the bastard of the barrel.”

“ What are you talking about?” You state sharply trying to feign ignorance in masking your terror that you might’ve put a larger target on Kaz’s back.

“ Oh you know what I’m talking about, I know you quite fancy that bastard but what would dear old Ryker say about that…” He trailed off getting closer, his voice dropping lowly.

“ If you dare do something-” You began to threaten before he clicked his tongue interrupting you.

“ Well for starters I could order my men to go capture them right now don’t think I don’t know about your little heist,” he interrupted now finally so close he was whispering in your ear as you shuddered in fear at the fact you knew why all the guards looked vaguely familiar they had been Rollins in disguise of course they had, “ or you could listen to me and your dear bastard and his group of misfits will go free unharmed, accomplishing their heist, and you won’t be dragged back to Knox.”

“ What do you want?” You said out of your clenched teeth to him terrified at his threat. You couldn’t let them be caught if you could’ve done something to avoid it and you certainly wouldn't, no you couldn’t allow yourself to be dragged back to that awful awful man. You would allow yourself to take your very last breath before you’d ever go back to him willingly or unwilling. Pekka only smirked in response from the little you had seen of him pulling away from your ear for a slight moment before leaning back.

“ To leave with me. You are to leave with me and work for me,” He started as you raised your eyebrow at why he’d possibly want you, you could offer up a decent set of skills but none he needed unless it had to do with your prior “occupation” in which you’d rather die however if thats what would save your friends and your livelihood so be it. But then the man continued, “ And when you do so, when the bastard comes for you, you will tell him no, you will reject the boy and you will break his heart.”

“ Is there anything else?” You let out monotonous, staring ahead blankly ignoring the man's disgustingly hot breath against your ear before pulling away doing the turn the dance required only to slam back into him. You hadn’t questioned his condition, you knew Kaz wouldn’t come for you, and you couldn’t even blame him for it how could you, it wasn’t going to break his heart that the bartender who had some extra abilities would end up going with Pekka Rollins his enemy sure it would piss him off in terms of loyalty but break his heart no, no it wouldn’t. But of course you couldn’t fathom how much it actually would, how would you when the only time the man would let his heart bleed for you was in the moments you’d blink and for those split milliseconds his gaze would soften when it wandered to you, or when the early hours of the morning when even the crows of Ketterdam slept but he’d be the only person up his mind drifting to you so quietly, or in crowded rooms when he could pick out your voice out , out of the many drinking it in memorising it ever so thoroughly, or maybe it was when he’d watch you clean the club late at night after closing and he‘d get to indulge at letting your name roll off his tongue not having to fear the world hearing, so yes how would you know when he loved you in the quiet moments, moments of time no one in the world could detect in his terror of someone finding out. And yet he failed.

“ All you will need to do is sit there and look handsome, with the possibility of obtaining information.” He responded back his voice slick with victory his words slithering like a snake into your ear but it wasn’t words of temptation he whispered it was venom it was the venom of the life you could not live it was the venom that would kill your livelihood, kill your soul, and ultimately kill you. But it wasn’t a choice it was a sword and a vial of poison it was death for you either way one would be slow and painful, guilt, shame, and hatred would be one or the other where only you would suffer completely it would take a bit of time to kick in but only you would be harmed without having to worry about the others. And so your choice was made you acting as your own executioner.

“ I will do it, but only if you agree that they will go successfully with the heist and you will not do anything to them directly or indirectly.” You said firmly making your final stand refusing to let any loopholes get through for your effort.

“ Fine, I agree. Let us go.” he said, grabbing your wrist harshly, twisting it a little bit as he dragged you to the door as you attempted to keep looking back a few times desperately as a final last hope that one of the crows may be there but of course this was reality they were not. And so you were dragged out into the dark night by the monster who was to cage you once again. The stars and sky of Ketterdam had never looked as cold and dull as they did tonight but you attempted to ignored them as you got into the dark carriage not caring to look around just staring blankly into the void of the night, the lights of the manor disappearing behind you and the weight of what you had just agreed to started consuming you into the void of the night.

[swaqcenix]

Is it casual now? | robber!yelena x gn!reader

Summary: A trip out to your usual coffee shop did not usually go wrong. That is until a robber decides to enter, threatening to kill everyone if they didn't give her their money. Shots fired, the gun landing on you. Yet, it appears Yelena has changed her interests from money to something, well someone far more valuable.

Warnings: 18+, gun shooting (no deaths), smut, gun & knife play, fingering (r), mirror sex, public sex, dark!yelena, dumbification, g!p yelena, penetration, (sort of nude photo)

Pairings: robber!yelena x civillian!reader, dark!yelena x reader, slight age gap, g!p yelena x reader, beefy!yelena (?)

Word count: 4K

DC: cafekitsune

AN: Well you can blame Nox for this.. Yes I got carried away! @yelenasdiary tag for you unhinged.. Side note being I wrote this while sipping on my wine also being an unhinged whore..

P.S, I've never written g!p before so bare with me!

Strolling in, the smell of the café hit you instantly. Your head directed towards the small corner of the room, where your regular table lay empty calling your name from afar. A soft smile painted upon your lips, as a sigh passed them.

You'd become renowned for having that little seat in the café, watching as the bustling crowds of New York passed you by. A small cough a few feet in front of you drew you from your thoughts.

Steve, the local barista was training up someone new. Ophelia, you believed her name to be. She seemed sweet enough a little shy of course, but that was a tendency bound to happen on one's first few shifts.

He nodded at you knowingly to which you responded with a toothy smile, nodding politely back to him. There was no need to ask him for your order, you'd been going to the café for three years and he'd been serving as a barista for two.

Feet carrying you to the small table in the corner, you gently pulled the chair out before sitting down a content hum leaving you as you did so. The café seemed content, the atmosphere always had a homely feeling like a comforting film you'd sit down to watch at night.

The crowds outside were loud, streets bustling and sounds of hectic life. It seemed so completely different, almost like you'd stepped into another dimension when walking into the quiet four walls of the building.

A coffee cup along with a small plate residing a cake made you jump slightly catching you off guard. Steve glanced at you, casting an apologetic look towards your way.

"Penny for your thoughts there, Y/N?" His voice guiding you back to reality.

A small laugh tipped past your lips as you shook your head. He was always a pleasant kind guy, one of the few friends you'd made in the city when you'd moved over.

"You know me Steve. Constantly distracted, yet forever in this café," you jokingly stated earning you a laugh in return.

With that, he turned his head realising the new Barista looked like she needed some support behind the counter. Your eyes drifted to her, giving her a small smile to convey she was doing okay, to which she sheepishly returned.

He returned to the his job behind the counter, serving the coffee, taking orders and overall handling everything well. This allowed you to once again return to your inner thoughts and glances out of the window, looking at passers by.

The smell of your drink, drifted up to your nose bringing you to a sense of peace and tranquillity you'd never find anywhere else. Not even in your hometown, that was. Moving to New York was frightening, big city and the concept of needing to meet new people. Yet, you felt it was the right place for you.

Never had you encountered anything chaotic except for the odd stupid misogynistic cat calls that was, you'd tended to refer back to the middle finger for that. Overall, this café had become one of home, where you could let yourself go and just dance away into the winds of the city.

Steve's voice called out once more, yet it wasn't directed at you for a change. Instead as you turned your head to the entrance you'd noticed a peculiar figure standing there. A cap placed upon her head, blonde short hair slicked back slightly, peaking out from underneath. A black leather jacket hung upon her figure admittedly making the mysterious figure attractive.

Yet, something about her seemed, off. Her stance and the way she portrayed herself. The back of her jacket seemed to be hiding something large, not that you could make it out. Her eyes were hidden behind sunglasses, making it impossible to identify who she was. Something about her sent chills down your spine for one reason, yet made your stomach flip for an entirely different reason.

Your eyes glanced back towards Steve's direction who made eye contact with you. It was a look that couldn't be placed, but if you had to it would be one of worry and an uncomfortable feeling on his face. As if the world slowed down, you saw the blonde figure slip her hand into the back of her jacket towards her jeans reaching for something.

Bile began to shoot up towards your throat, yet you felt your hands go clammy and stress overtaking your entire body. It was invading your chest and you glanced between the figure and Steve, trying to sink into your seat.

It was as if everything happened in a flash, tome physically slowing down as her nimble yet long fingers whipped out a gun, a large one for that matter pointing it into the air. Cups around you smashed all over, followed by the screams of civilians who were rightfully so petrified. Steve didn't seem to move, even as the woman's voice called out to him and Ophelia.

"Let me make this very clear. This will go well, if you open the cash register and give me what you have within there."

Something about the husk in her voice, made you feel things that should shame you in many ways. The woman stood in your favourite café holding a gun in an attempted robbery. However, the way she spoke and stood, the way her lips tilted up into a smirk that would send anyone running hit straight into your core.

Steve, never reacted and Ophelia looked like she had tears spilling down her face. Not daring to move, you kept your body slumped down in your seat, the silence in the four walls seemed deafening, aside from the heavy breathing and soft crying from civilians.

"Am I talking to my fucking self?" The woman snapped, causing Steve to jump.

Ophelia attempted to stagger forward, the fear in her eyes as evident as the clouds in the sky. Her brown hair was now falling down her face, completely messy and unkempt as her teeth chattered together.

"We-We don't have much," She whispered.

The blonde woman, scoffed moving to a nearby table, where a wife and her husband were sitting. You recognised them as frequent visitors like yourself, not that was any matter now. All the woman did was glare at the couple and they scrambled out the seats cowering into the corner of the café.

It was then, she shrugged her black leather jacket off, throwing it carefully over the chair with precision. That was when you saw her. Laced in tattoo's, all over her shoulder's and arms and by the love of god they looked admittedly hot.

One particular tattoo stood out, it was the shape of a Rose that spiralled slowly into a sort of motorbike, like it was attached to the end of the bike spelling out words you couldn't place. The words looked almost Russian to you, but you were sat from a distance.

She flexed her shoulder for a second, your eyes widening as you gawked at her. The muscles on her flexed as she did and holy shit you could tell she worked out. Ether that or at the very least did some sort of muscular style of work area.

The blonde robber stalked over to the cash machine yanking it from if's place with such force, it cracked. You observed in silence not daring to even breath let alone shift in your seat as she dragged whatever little cash the café had within it's machine.

Her eyes, narrowed before she whipped off her glasses, her eyes coming into view from your angle. They were the colour of the earth, green and captivating even if you said so yourself. A hard grunt left her lips as she gawked at the cash in hand, before glaring up at the two Barista's. Steve and Ophelia didn't dare shift themselves, their feet almost glued to the floor eyes cast down towards the blonde's gun.

"Right change of plans. Everyone in this café will give me what cash they have, or anything of value. I don't want to leave here empty handed," She husked between gritted teeth.

The blonde began to walk around the room as you watched in silence, body frozen over like a blanket of ice held you down. She walked over from person to person, collecting anything of value. The gun was clutched hard in her hand, showing her power and domination over anyone who looked like they were going to question her.

"This is all I have Ma'm," a younger man stuttered out earning a sheer laugh that was bone-chilling from her.

"That will do, also if you leave this place at least pass my name off as Yelena," she stuttered loud enough for everyone to hear.

Yelena. The name wanted to slide out from your mouth, the desperation of testing it out on your tongue seeping over you. Obviously you didn't dare, not wanting to attract any unwanted attention to yourself, the least you wanted was for the blonde to know you found her insanely attractive.

Instead your head removed focused on being lowered, hands clasped tightly together underneath the table. The heels of Yelena's boots hit the floor as she walked with authority around the café. Your heart began to hammer hard and fast against your rib cage, practically trying to leap out of your chest. The boots got closer to your table until the silence once again succumbed to the room.

Someone behind you attempted to stand, before a deafening shot was fired into the direction. A nerve wrecking sob escaped from behind you and for a moment you breathed out a sigh of relief, grateful Yelena hadn't actually shot them. At least not yet.

"That's what happens if you try to shift or retaliate. Just behave and follow instructions and you won't have issues. God I hate people."

She muttered the last sentence in an accent and you realised then. She was definitely Russian. The ringing in your ears made it hard to make the sentences out or any sounds, but you didn't need to. Your eyes landed on her black laced army boots, the painful reminder hitting you that you were next.

Rather than lifting your head up, you simply drew the cash out of your pockets. You usually carried an obscene amount of it in your pockets which to no surprise you'd often been lectured before. Never have you had to be grateful for once that you had made smart choices in carrying the cash.

Shifting it onto the table, you swore you heard a half gasp at the amount you'd placed in front of Yelena. However the sound went as quick as it came, instead replaced by what sounded like a pleased grunt before the boots began to walk away.

A small sigh of relief overcame you as you felt the sense of dread slightly lift off your shoulders. The sheer urge to get out of the café became overwhelming, despite knowing or at least believing in your safety. However, the relief was quickly replaced by dread as the boots returned to your table stopping in front of you once again.

A few small murmurs passed around the room and you could easily imagine the absolute horror and fear on Steve's face even with your head down. No breath left your lips, instead your settled on holding it dreading what might happen. What made this horribly worse was the fact somehow this scenario, the fear and knowing the blonde carried herself with such an authority and a significant look only turned you on. You felt like you should be disgusted by that, embarrassed even, but you couldn't bring yourself to do so.

"Raise your head up," She instructed her voice firm and leaving no room for arguments.

Part of you wished to argue against it, but deep down you knew how stupid you'd be making yourself look if you did so. Therefore, rather than causing a whole scene and making everyone else around you be put in danger, you followed the instructions lifting your head up to meet her firm gaze.

It was as if time itself stopped when your eyes connected. A glimmer of something you couldn't quite place, reflected within Yelena's eyes her lips twitching slightly. Almost as if the blonde was fighting the urge to smile and you felt like it wouldn't be a fake one if she did, making your stomach flutter slightly.

As quickly as the look came however, it snapped back into one of authority and dominance. Her smirk now replaced with lips pressed together into a thin line. Yelena's arm roughly grasped onto your own, her hand sending a heavy amount of arousal into your core making your cheeks flush.

If she noticed, she didn't comment only dragging you up off the chair and pulling you firmly with her. You didn't dare question stumbling with her as your body followed suit.

The blonde dragged you into the corner of the room, towards the mirror in the corner of the café. Albeit you'd always questioned what it stood there for, Steve always joking saying customers liked to take aesthetically pleasing photos in front of the mirror.

You'd never questioned it since and now. Yelena had your front against her back, pushing you forward so you are now facing the mirror, eyes connected with her own through the glass. Her lips tilted up and she whispered into your ear something of Russian before a husky laugh escaped her lips.

Yelena's hands wrapped around your throat, instantly causing you to freeze. You'd noticed everyone in the café was now watching, some frozen in fear others in complete shock. However, something in the back of your mind lingered and you couldn't bring yourself to care. The arousal now coursed through your veins, cheeks tinting with a heavy pink as it spread over your face.

That's when you felt something hard pressing into the crevice of your ass, it appeared to be getting harder by the second. Your eyes widened when you realised what the hardness was, lips parting open as you stared at her. Yelena's eyes merely darkened a low chuckle escaping her lips.

Her thumb dragged firmly across your lower lip before slipping it into your mouth raising an eyebrow at you expectantly. Not wanting to risk anything else happening, you took her thumb into her mouth, sucking on it with a skill you hadn't realised you possessed, keeping eye contact at all times.

Her member dug into the back of you, hard and firm causing wetness to slip out of your underwear. She wasn't unknowing of this, the blonde's grin turning into something of a devilish smirk, lips moving to your ear.

"If you say stop, I will. I might be a robber but I'm not a monster," she husked quiet enough for only you to hear.

Did you want her to stop? Your brain screamed at you to be seriously logical, not to be some sort of pathetic whore for five minutes. However, your arousal was going to drive you mad. Even if you did say yes, the wetness that had dripped down your thighs would still have to be taken care of either way. Therefore you merely shook your head, cheeks flushed with slight embarrassment.

"Let's make them watch you hm, watch my fingers slide into you while you're up against the mirror. Seeing yourself behave so well for me while looking like a filthy whore in front of them," She husked out, glad you'd accepted to be her small toy.

"What about the m-money?" The new barista, Ophelia spoke up, her voice sounding petrified.

"Fuck the money, I have my mind set on a different reward isn't that right pet?" She mumbled lips pressed into your neck as her cock got harder pressing against you.

Her cock felt hard and incredibly good pressed into you, even if you couldn't touch or even feel it fully yet. Instead all you could do is let out a small, whimper shame in the back of your mind at what you had become.

She started without warning grinding you back against her member, the feeling of arousal filling your mind blocking out anyone in the café. Yelena's hand slipped underneath your jeans, hiding you away from prying eyes of the customers.

The blonde's fingers slipped inside of your underwear, slipping instantly into your folds dipping in and out. Your cheeks flushed and you tried to hide your face in her neck not wanting to remember you were in a café. They could all see you and it lingered in the back of your mind. Yet, your arousal, desires and needs were too high and too overwhelming to bear and Yelena knew this.

She grabbed a fist full of your hair, pulling your face back to the mirror, her fingers moving with a more forceful power now, slipping in and out with clear intention. Her muscles flexed against you, slipping back around your throat squeezing slightly eliciting a gasp from you as you bit down hard on your lip. She smirked, shifting her cock against you once more, moaning deep into your ear.

"You're taking it so well little whore," her accent emphasising on the word whore.

Her free hand slipped into her back pocket, drifting a knife down your neck and that only turned you on further. Hips slightly bucking into her hand as you felt gross yet so turned on looking into the mirror. A small trail of blood trickled down your neck that Yelena quickly kissed before biting down on your jugular.

Without warning her hand slipped to her phone taking a small photo of you, positioned in front of the mirror. Her cock buried into your ass while her fingers worked against you. You felt like a pathetic toy, for her to use and the others to see how ridiculous you were for some stranger, but you were too wet and desperate to care.

Just as you were approaching some form of high, Yelena yanked her fingers out shoving them into your mouth. Obediently, you took her fingers slightly whining at the withdrawal and wanting to chase your high. She laughed shaking her head, before spinning you back around.

"They're not seeing you cum Detka. That's for my eyes," She gritted out her voice filled with lust.

Without warning using all her muscular strength, she picked you up with ease into her arms beginning to walk to the back staff room. Your legs instinctively wrapped around her waist, face hidden into her neck with embarrassment.

As soon as she entered the staff room and shut the door behind her, Yelena pinned you up against it. Her knife yanked back out, ripping your top open and pushing her own jeans and boxers down.

Yelena's cock instantly freeing, you realised just how turned on she was for you. Her pre-cum slipping down and out of the tip, your eyes darkening in desire. Instinctively, your fingers wrapped around her, pumping up and down, rubbing at the tip as she threw her head forward biting down on your neck.

"You're a filthy little slut aren't you? Needing my cock that badly, needing me that badly you let me do that in front of those people, stupid pet."

Her gun dragged down your stomach the cold metal of it making your skin prickle and shiver. The fear you should be feeling was nowhere to be found. Instead the fear was replaced by an overwhelming almost painful sense of desire. It was making the feeling of being horny almost foggy and impossible to function.

She slapped your hand away, your body still being held up by her muscles and strong build. Hands caressed over her muscles, running over that one tattoo you'd become fixated on. Her eyes fluttered with something for a moment, body freezing as you did so. Yet, as quickly as it came the flash was over.

Yelena began to pump her hand up and down on her cock, moaning excessively loudly. It was evident from her moans and excessive whining she wanted, even perhaps needed the others outside of the staff room to hear.

The wetness spilled onto your abdomen, all over your chest spilling over your jeans. You were now covered in Yelena's pre-cum, her face a picture of lust and excitement. The blonde hoisted you up further not giving you any warning before sliding into you.

She began to move her cock in and out of you at an animalistic pace, giving you no time to adjust. Yelena stretched you out before slamming straight back into you. Her cock felt warm inside of you, your head being slightly shielded by her hand cupping it with a fist full of your hair.

"You like this huh? That much of a fucking dumb slut, you needed me to fuck you in here. Some random stranger's cock. I should show the world to you. Let them see what a whore you are."

Her words only spurred you on, desperate for any sort of release as you bounced harder onto her. Each thrust caused you to moan louder, the people still most likely in the café forgotten about. All that invaded your mind and senses, your body was Yelena. Her cock, her muscles her very essence.

A particular hard thrust had knots tightening in your stomach and you knew then you were close. Judging by the look on the blonde's face so was she, her finger's slipping down to your clit.

As soon as she began to play with your clit, rubbing it in the right way you lost all thought to think. No words could ever be formed for the way you felt. Fingers digging into her skin as she pumped ferociously into your pussy.

"You want to cum hm, use your words," She husked yanking your head back."

"Please," was all you could murmur out trying to chase your high desperately.

Yelena bit down on your ear as she thrusted into you whispering something in Russian. You assumed it was dirty and asking you to release for her. The Russian words mixed with her thrusts sent you spiralling, moaning louder than you deemed possible. Your pussy tightened around her cock, walls closing in as your juices pumped all over her.

That only sent Yelena herself spiralling, quickly pulling out before releasing herself all over your stomach, dripping down onto the cold tiles of the floor. The room filled with gasps and pants as she gently pulled out of you, carrying you with such a soft way you almost questioned if it was the same woman. She lowered you down onto a nearby chair, passing you her jacket.

No words were spoken, your breath was still panting as you came back to reality, realising just exactly what the fuck you'd done. Before you could comment she was stalking to the back exit door fully dressed once again before turning back once.

"I'll see you again pet, don't you worry. I've found something money simply cannot buy."

Before you could even muster a response, she slipped out the backdoor, shutting it behind her with her hands leaving you to ponder your thoughts in question. As reality began to fade back into your view and the location of where you remained hit you, your cheeks turned beetroot red.

Stumbling over yourself, you managed to get yourself dressed your top on the floor ripped making you know you didn't merely imagine some sort of slutty scenario in your head. You slipped on her jacket, her aroma filling your senses making you almost fall to the floor there and then.

You'd made it to the back door, stumbling out of it just to see her staring back at you. Her head was now hidden behind a helmet, her body perched onto a motorbike, but you knew it was her. That explained the tattoo then..

Before you could utter a sentence her way, she sped off on her bike, heading into the open traffic roads of NYC. You stood there wrapped in what was her jacket, watching her speed away.

Yelena faded into the distance leaving with what once was your dignity and that one damned photo that she took that could land itself anywhere. The photo that could cost you your career and what was your life's worth yet all you could think about is how you were covered in her essence.

[swanimagines]

Hello! So I've been reading a lot of your works *cough* mainly Kaz and Pin *cough* and I was wondering if I could request one? If so, A6 from your dialogue prompt list with Kaz Brekker. Have a great day <3

Prompt: A6. “Ugh, people are so weird.”

A/N: I still can't look at him without remembering I actually have HUGGED that man and I get to do it once more in two months I-

RUMOUR TOLD ME

Ketterdam, in its darkness and grimness, was the last place Kaz would expect to find someone like you. You, a cheery, warm person who believed all people were good unless proven otherwise. And even working with the Dregs hadn’t wiped that attitude off you, which had always puzzled Kaz. And maybe it was the way you always saw the good in everyone was what made him develop feelings for you. Or rather, as he convinced himself, he was maybe slightly interested, but not necessarily romantically.

Either way, he treated you like he had always treated you, as another Crow, and he thought everyone else thought so too. And maybe that’s why it was so shocking when you came to the Slat one day, laughing as you slid to sit at the bar counter, one stool away from Kaz.

He stared at you for a moment, and you locked eyes with him. “I just heard the funniest thing.”

“Can’t wait to hear it,” Kaz mumbled, glancing at the barkeeper who immediately started preparing a drink for him.

“There’s a rumour circling around that Kaz Brekker has a crush,” you snickered, and Kaz immediately froze. “And the crush being me. Ugh, people are so weird.”

A short silence descended upon you, and your giggling echoed in Kaz’s mind.

He closed his eyes for a moment. Get it together, Brekker.

“And you find it funny?” Kaz grumbled, which earned a frown from you.

“Well, we are complete opposites. I mean, I guess people who sent this rumour going are probably avid romance novel readers whose favourite trope is ‘opposites attract’ but I have no idea what kind of drink they took to get themselves so drunk that they spun out this kind of theory.” You shrugged, gesturing to the barkeeper to prepare a drink for you too.

Kaz scowled. “Those kinds of rumours should be cut off before they have a chance to fly.”

You laughed. “Oh come on Kaz, it’s just some children spinning stories for their entertainment, it won’t hurt anyone.”

Kaz almost barked at you, telling you that children of Ketterdam should know better than joke with things like that before someone teaches them what it’s like to lose the fun in their life forever, but he held himself back. His mind momentarily filled with pictures of what could happen if the wrong kind of people found out about that rumour and believed it. You’d disappear and eventually come back to the Slat, carried by Matthias, with a knife in your heart, your body already cold, eyes open, beginning to rotten, your mouth opened in an eternal scream–

Kaz shook his head, forcing himself to stop thinking about that scenario. 

“Rumours are dangerous,” he said, leaning towards you slightly. “Even ridiculous ones.”

You scoffed, waving your hand. “I know, but no one is going to believe something like that.”

Kaz withdrew, taking his cane and gripping the silver crow head. He wanted to tell you you’re off duty for a while. He wanted to claim he needed help in office work, which would bind you into Slat for a few weeks. He wanted to find whoever is spreading this rumour and warn them off, threaten them. Maybe even break their legs to ensure they won’t sing about it.

But even if that would work, and Kaz knew it would, it could be a sign that the rumour actually had truth to it. It would make him look weak, even if that person would never tell about his visit.

You got the drink and downed it, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, before you looked at Kaz again. “Do you have any tasks for me? If not, Inej said she’d like to have company when she goes to run an errand but if you have something more important to do, I’ll pass on that.”

Kaz clenched his jaw, staring at his still full glass of kvas. “No.” Be careful.

You nodded and disappeared to the crowd, and Kaz told himself to not look at you walking away. And as soon as your steps faded, he downed the drink and stood up, making his way to the attic. He needed to take his mind off of… this, whatever it was.

But of course, on his way, he came across Jesper waiting by Wylan’s door, spinning his other revolver. Kaz already saw from Jesper’s grin what he was going to say, that he had also heard the rumours. “Hey, Boss. Word is you’ve got a crush on our Sunshine the Second.”

Kaz cocked an eyebrow at him. “What makes you think that?”

Jesper stopped spinning his revolver and shrugged. “Well. It’s been obvious for all of us for a while. I suspected it, so I told Nina, and she listened to your heartbeat while our star Sunshine was around, and–”

“And nothing,” Kaz barked. “Whatever you have heard or understood, is not true.”

Jesper cackled, and Kaz wanted nothing more than to stuff the handle of Jesper’s beloved revolver into his throat at that moment. But it was more because he realised everyone knew. His Crows, at least, knew.

When Jesper stopped cackling, his tone was more serious. “But hey, I understand that this… thing isn’t a good thing to be circling around. If you want some of us to go uh, find out who put the rumour to circle in the first place, just tell us.” He winked. “And of course, no telling your beloved.”

Kaz thought, staring at Jesper. He wanted to keep denying it, tell Jesper everyone are idiots, doubt Nina’s skills as a heartrender. But he knew that nothing would work anymore, everything would just confirm their every suspicion, those that were true and those that were not true.

So he nodded. “Deal with it. Quietly.”

Jesper nodded in return. “Always, boss.”

And when Kaz continued ascending the steps, he could almost hear Jesper’s grin. If there had been some doubt in Jesper’s mind, now there most definitely wasn’t.

Kaz knew that his Crows knowing except for you was miles better than the whole Ketterdam knowing. If everyone knew, or if such suspicions would rise to any extent, they would inevitably eventually go straight to rivaling gangs. And at that point, depending on how stupid they were, they could follow the rumour just in case and ambush you.

They would be stupid because if you were killed by a gang, Kaz wouldn’t rest before each one’s guts had painted every wall of their past territory, but they would also be smart because they’d take away the one thing Kaz truly cared about in this world, and it would be the second time around. Kaz wasn’t sure if he would ever recover, which would potentially make him weak in a way, maybe even suicidal with his hunger for bloodshed. He could be the most feared person in all of Kerch for a few weeks, but constantly throwing himself in situations he could get killed would eventually kill him. It could even be his goal, to die fighting and take as many of his enemies with him before that.

But after those little gossipers would be getting caught and warned off, things would maybe become better, and Kaz would be able to forget about this whole mess.

---

Requests are open! FANDOM LIST | PROMPT LIST(S) | RULES (READ!!!)

[mordredisacoolname]

GRISHAVERSE CHARACTERS WHEN YOU FALL ASLEEP ON THEM

Shadow and bone / six of Crows

MALE READER (can also be read as gn)

Characters: Alina Mal Genya Nikolai Kaz Inej Jesper Nina Wylan Matthias

*Mostly based on the show as I'm only in the middle of Siege and Storm

ALINA- you were both very tired, riding in a carriage led by horses. Alina was starting outside the window when she felt a weight on her shoulder, turning her head she saw you with your eyes closed asleep on her. Smiling to herself she moved a little so you'd be more comfortable and spread a little warmth through you so you won't be cold. She tried staying as still as possible in the carriage to not wake you up.

MAL- you were both drinking some kvas and talking nonsense outside your tent while everyone else were asleep. As he stared into the sky talking about keramzin memories he was interrupted by your head falling on his shoulder. "Do I bore you this much?" He barked out a laugh, watching your sleepy face and moving to a more comfortable position. He decided to let you sleep a little more before waking you up and returning to the tent.

NIKOLAI- you were hanging out in his ship quarters with a few other ship mates, his arm hang around your shoulders when he felt your body leaning towards his own, your hair tickling his neck. He watched you in amusement while Tamar and Pryvet were telling a story about a past adventure, tightening his arm around you.

GENYA- you both were sitting on a sofa in your room at the little palace, genya talking about her day and (rightfully) complaining about the queen, with a tea cup in her hand. When she asked you about your opinion, not hearing an answer she glanced at you finding out you were asleep. She presumed you were just leaning against her as you often did, but to her surprised you were just passed out from the tiring day as a grisha in the little palace. Smiling softly she carefully helped you fully lay down on the sofa, and left you to your rest.

KAZ- you were sitting in his room trying to form the next step leading to the fall of Pekka Rollins when he felt a slight weight on his shoulder. He immediately tensed up frozen in place. He tried calling your name hoping you'd wake up but unfortunately for him you didn't. He wanted to shrag you off, and he would've if you didn't know each other for a very long time. It felt weird, anxious but also a little comforting. He stayed like this still as a statue for a few minutes before slightly tapping you on your arm to wake you up.

INEJ- you were both sitting outside in silence wanting some peace and quiet from the loud tavern when inej felt your head slip down to her shoulder. She smiled softly, studying your face; feeling the urge to let you stay like this forever. Unfortunately it was getting late and unsafe outside, so she had to wake you up, but she really enjoyed those few minutes of you together.

JESPER- you were sitting at a table in the barrel watching people drink, talk and play, when you felt the tiredness creeping up on you "don't you dare fall asleep and leave me alone in this boredome" said Jesper while holding some sort of drink on his hand. "I'm not asleep" you perked up at the accusation, taking a sip of your own drink you left on the table. As the time passed on, you stopped answering Jesper's questions and observations. "Not asleep my ass" he snored, finishing the rest of his drink and helping sleepy you stand up and go to your room.

NINA- you were sitting on soft cushions near a window watching the snow. You rented a small room and decided to lit a fire and warm up a bit. You were both quiet, enjoying the outside view and the inside warmth, wrapped together in furrs. You slowly fell asleep, head tilted back when Nina noticed you're not awake, laughing quietly she guided your head on her shoulder, tightening the furr around you two.

WYLAN- wylan was mixing some stuff together when you called him to take a break and join you on the sofa, petting the empty space besides you. After a few protests he finally agreed and sat down next to you, your arm wrapping around him. Drawing him closer you kisses his head, nuzzling your nose to his wild hair, feeling sleepy. He was telling you about what he was making when you slowly started shifting away to sleep. When he noticed he smiled trying not to move his head too much as your head was on his. He was just sitting there squished between you and the sofa, and eventually fell asleep too.

MATTHIAS- he was sitting all grumpy away from the rest of the crows when you approached him. "Mind if I join you" you asked not waiting for his answer and sat down besides him. "Why do you ask if you're going to do that anyway" he scowled. You shrugging your shoulders leaning against him and observing everything that was going on in front of you. Announcing you were tired, you tilted your head to rest on his shoulder, instantly falling asleep. Looking at you Matthias sighed annoyingly, but let you stay mumbling something in Fjerdan.

[cyberstrm]

kaz brekker affection hcs

show!kaz brekker x gn!reader

cws: none

a/n: hi! i'm alive! exam szn is finally over and its time for some soft kaz hcs

kaz is definitely an acts of service/gift giving kinda guy. you discover your favourite food? it'll be ready and in your hands every evening without fail. you need something fixed? he's on it. see something nice in a shop window? it's yours now.

loves to send you stuff with lil notes attached. usually flowers, he always seems to know when the ones he got you previously are about to wilt

"y/n. enjoy the flowers. k.b

words of affirmation are not really his forte. he doesn't like to reveal how he feels, so his kinder words are reserved for special moments or when you two are completely alone

"you know i care about you, love. i'd never let anything happen to you."

only when he really trusts you does he allow for physical touch. you have to take it super slow, and he has a few actions that feels safe for him, like holding your face, kissing you, and tracing your collarbones.

he also shows his affections in his protectiveness of you. like. if anyone tries ro hurt you or get to you, they're in for a painful surprise

he's not a quality time person. of course he loves to spend time with you, but the nature of his profession sometimes makes that difficult

in terms of what he likes, he's super hypocritical and adores words of affirmation. he loves when you tell him how you feel about it, it just warms him

"tell me how you feel, doll."

"you know how i feel about you, kaz."

"i want to hear you say it."

[valentinedaughtler]

Haven’t I Given Enough?

Kaz Brekker x GN!Inventor!Reader

TW: use of Y/N, mild, mild angst, slight ooc Kaz(?) (I think that’s it, let me know if I missed anything please.)

Synopsis: You’ve known Kaz for years, inventing gadgets to assist in heists and being his right hand ‘man’. One night you ask him if you can join a heist, but it doesn’t go as planned….

REQUESTS: OPEN✅

____________________________________________

My eyes flitted between the arriving guests in the bar. The Crow Club was packed tonight, and pigeons strolled in with restless naivety. I sat in the corner of the bustling room, sighing with exhaustion. I had just spent seventeen hours imitating mechanical watches in order to create a ‘fake’ for Kaz do swap with a real one. ‘Just something I need for a heist,’ was all he had said.

It would be worth it to know Kaz was proud of me in the end. Though, it was a long shot to think he would even do much as acknowledge anything I did.

I pondered whether I should slip through the crowd to find Jesper, but I couldn’t spot him. Instead, I pushed my way out of the suffocating bar out into the damp streets of Ketterdam. The cool air calmed my mind as I crossed toward the Slat. The cold made my cheeks rosy.

With the flick of a wrist, I flipped a switch blended into the old building’s exterior wall. It was hidden to an unsuspecting pedestrian yet, but it set off a system of pullies I had integrated into the inner walls a long time ago. A soft shlink was followed by the outward jutting of brick.

The side of the building became a rock-wall of sorts, since I could not climb up every surface like Inej. I began to grip the bricks, digging my nails into the gritty platforms.

Kaz was not always a fan of my inventions. A few had blown up in his face- literally- but it seemed he kept me around due to my many successes. I could fix any machine made by man. I didn’t have to know what it was, I could just take it apart in my mind, then do so in reality.

This was one of my inventions, a brick wall that was easy to climb, but could be hidden. Inej loved it- Kaz felt it was a waste of time.

He said there were stairs for a reason.

I shimmied the window of Kaz’s office open, the latch flipping and the glass sliding. I hopped off of the ledge and into the office, making sure to reset my brick contraption. I turned around and cleared my throat, but Kaz did not glance up at me. I rolled my eyes as he squinted at the blueprints that lay on his makeshift desk.

“Good evening, Brekker,” I greeted with a jokingly enticing tone. His eye twitched and he proceeded to turn his attention to me.

“Hello, Y/N,” his gravely voiced rasped in response. I smiled slightly, regretting so, and dig into my left pants pocket. I pulled out a shiny, gold watch with engraved initials. Whose they were was unknown to me, but if I asked, Kaz would most likely just shut me down. I had to respect his odd secrecy after all he had done for me. Out of all the years I’d known him, it has always been as if he kept me at an arm’s length. He was careful to never be vulnerable, as if that was the same as his skin touching mine.

I gestured for him to catch the watch when I tossed it, but he glared. I let out an exasperated sigh.

“You’re such a buzzkill,” I teased while handing the fake to him.

“You’re… difficult,” he retorted, but there was no malice behind his words- surprisingly. I huffed and plopped onto the blanket sprawled out on the windowsill. My eyes followed Kaz’s movements as he tentaviety inspected the watch. After a few minutes he placed it onto his desk and resumed his work. I waited patiently for any sign of recognition, but it never came.

“You’re welcome,” I mumbled while stretching out my legs. I opened up my leather sketchbook to doodle a new invention design. That or I’d just draw Kaz. But I was too annoyed with him to do so.

The dark haired boy sighed as he looked over at me. “You did good. It looks identical.”

I didn’t say anything in response, but I smiled slightly, my face heating up. It was embarrassing how easily I was flattered by Kaz, who could barely do the bare minimum.

“What ere you using it for— the watch, I mean,” I asked with growing curiosity. Kaz halted his work for a moment, most likely deciding if he felt like sharing or not.

“A local banker,-“

“The more-of-a-wanker-than-a-banker one?” I cut off his response, immediately feeling embarrassed. Kaz looked at me with mild confusion. “Inside joke with Jesper,” I elaborated.

He hummed in response, then continued, “He’s more of a swanker. For the past few months he has been flaunting his wealth a little too much. Especially his watch. It’s his most prized possession. I plan to take it from his vault; a simple swap.”

“What would you do without me?” I asked with a sly smirk. Kaz huffed, perhaps laughed.

“I’d have less of your inventions explode on me.”

“It was one time, Kaz,” I said with exasperation. My eye glittered as I met his gaze. I open my mouth to speak, but immediately close it again, pressing my lips together firmly.

“Kaz?”

“Y/N,”

“I want to go on a mission with you and the crows,” I blurted out. Kaz froze, only for a fraction of a moment, but Kaz Brekker froze. He nodded towards my left arm, where a tattoo of a crow craning over a guatlet was etched into my skin.

“You are a crow,” he finally rasped, dodging my question until I glared daggers into his skin. “And I have everyone we need for the mission-“

“Wylan is sick. You need someone who can easily disable complex machinery- the alarms, the traps-“

“I said no,” Kaz’s voice raised, sounding threatening.

“Why not?”

“Y/N,” his voice sounded as if he meant, don’t push it. But I did. I always did, and Kaz always kept me by his side anyways.

“I don’t understand- ever since I got hurt on that one heist you haven’t let me participate-“

“Exactly! You got hurt,” he said. His jaw clenched and his eyes avoided mine. I watched his Adam’s apple bob as he gulped.

“Dregs get hurt all the time- saints, some of the crows do too-“

“This is different,”

“How?”

“You’re an investment,” he stated blankly, “and I protect my investments.” I felt heat flush my face, my fists balling up and my shoulders tensing.

“That’s rich, Kaz, real rich,” I spat. Embarrassment pooled in my stomach and my eyes. “But that’s all you want, right? Kruge? Money? Power?” He didn’t say anything as I slitted my eyes and scrunched my nose. “Saints forbid the people who help you get to that point.”

Before Kaz could respond, if he even chose to, I got up and walked across his office, my shoes clacking against the hard, wooden floors. The old floorboards moaned and groaned at the pressure I subjected them to.

“Y/N-,” Kaz tried to get up, but his bad leg involuntarily spasmed at his abrupt movement.

The door slammed behind me. I knew it wasn’t a big deal, it felt like the last thing to topple a delicate card tower. Each card was a jab or a deny Kaz made regarding our… relationship, if you could call it that. He and I had been friends long before the other crows came along, yet I felt I’d come to know him the least. I sighed.

I turned back around on my heel, opening the splintered office door. On the other side was Kaz, reaching for the handling on the opposing side.

“You’re not an investment,”

I kept any snarky comments bottled up inside, along with my tears. I could tell what he was convey was eating away at him, so I let him speak.

“If I lost you, I’d have to burn Ketterdam down, and then I’d have no kingdom to rule,” his words soared through the air between us and to my heart.

“I just keep feeling like I’ve given enough, Kaz. I know I deserve to go on heists. If you see my as an equal, you have to treat me like one.” I met his deep, coffee-brown eyes.

He nodded. One of his gloved hands hesitantly, begrudgingly, came up to touch my face. He cupped my cheek and I leaned into the cold, leather touch. I knew this was the best answer he could give me at the moment. It was a more meaningful gesture than anything he could’ve said. He’d let me help on the heist, and for once in a very long time, it felt like he had let his high walls crumble a bit.

I knew I’d given enough.

____________________________________________

Word Count: 1460

____________________________________________

Part 2????

-Valentine

[thedelusionreaderbitch]

Poly! Kanej x gn! Reader - Bound to one another

A/n: This was a fun one to write, and originally it was going to be longer (kaz and inej are barely in it lol) but my trail of thought for this one ended. Regardless, I hope you all still like it!

Summary: As an anniversary gift, Inej gifts the three of you matching knives with your titles on them. You are confused by yours.

Warnings: killing, swearing, kidnapping, slavers, the slave trade in the grishaverse, violence, not too graphic gore, I think that's it? You have been warned!

The three P's:

[Pov: 2nd person] [Pronouns used: you/your] [Pairings: (poly!) (romantic!) kanej x reader]

As always, not my gif

It had been a week before your anniversary and Inej (despite the three of you agreeing not to) had decided to gift each of you a knife. As she claimed she wasn't going to be back from the seas until the day after so she had to give it to you now.

They looked the same to the unassuming eye - cold, black, slick, grisha steel daggers. Yet every one of them had a name forged onto the blade that you could only see under certain lights.

Inej's inscribed Queen of Thieves, Kaz had Crow King, and yours was Ketterdam's Ruler.

At first yours had confused you, Inej's made sense, she really was the queen of thieves, and Kaz's was just bluntly obvious but yours seemed to always escape your mind any time you felt close to an answer. How could you be the ruler of Ketterdam, when there was already a crowning king and queen?

Even after being with the two of them after all this time doubts like this always clouded your mind, they were after all together before you ever came into the picture. What if the frame didn't fit with you in it? What if Ketterdam didn't need another Monarch?

Then the doubts would quell when Kaz would brush his hand against yours, or when Inej would slide you a book that you wanted to get and hadn't even mentioned it to her yet.

Of course they didn't disappear, like Inej they were never truly gone, but right now you had more pressing issues.

"Y/n, you need to get out of here." Kaz hissed at you as the both of you had your bodies pressed up against a wall as you peaked around to check if there were any guards.

This time it wasn't a merchant's mansion where you were going to steal some jewel, or other valuable. This wasn't even a heist, originally you had gone alone but Kaz had tailed you to the slaver's house and now he had decided to show himself.

Another reason you weren't truly in rank with your lovers, you couldn't pin point their presences when they could do it with each other.

The reason you were at this slaver's house was actually your girlfriend's and boyfriend's anniversary present.

"Why did you follow me Kaz." You growl back quietly as you see the guards go through their next rotation.

"Inej is back."

Shit.

How could you forget that Inej was coming back today? The day where the three of you were having your unofficial anniversary nonetheless! Although that was the whole reason why you were here, yet it didn't push down your disappointment in yourself. The three of you had made a pact that you were not allowed to go on any jobs the day Inej comes back from the seas. Of course you were the one to break it.

Though, you weren't technically on a job.

"This is important Kaz, tell Inej I'll be there in an hour."

Ouch, that would hurt your plan a bit but you would stick to it nevertheless. You wouldn't let them down more than you already had.

"No."

You took a quick glance at Kaz to see his face glaring back at you before you looked back and saw your opening.

"I promise this isn't a job, I'll be there in an hour and if not wait thirty more minutes then you can bust me if you want."

Kaz sighed as your heartbeat quickens with the adrenaline starting to course through your veins.

"Fine, one hour."

You grinned at him before taking your opening.

His name is Ethan Sullivan, and you were going to kill him.

Your motive for killing this bastard was simple, or rather it was simple to you.

He's a slaver who not only has been getting on Inej's ass but nearly killed her. Then he captured Jesper and only let him go after he got Kaz.

While Kaz had escaped fairly quickly he still had found out your significant others weakness; each other, and now he was dangerous. Very dangerous.

Your pretty crows were waiting to find the right moment when to strike him back, but you knew he wouldn't whittle his life on a pleasantly soft sofa as he figured out the secret to take over the barrel. His plans had to be going out soon, which meant he was an admirable foe and dangerous - too dangerous. He had to be put down, permanently.

"Come here." Sullivan croaked over to you as you posed as a servant with a blanket resting over your arm. "Help me out of bed."

You had chosen the precise time where you could be alone with him, so that no one could disturb your little scheme. You even made sure to lock the door on your way in, then you would escape through his window.

Moving towards the man you felt the weight of the dagger Inej had given you weighing down your pocket.

Ketterdam's Ruler.

"Move quicker would you!" He snapped at you and it's there you make your decision.

You do move quickly, though as you do you leap on top of him and place the stygian blade to his throat.

He tries to cry out but you shush him like he's a child and press the knife close to his throat.

"Ethan Sullivan, you nearly killed the Wraith, and you captured Dirtyhands, now I'm here for vengeance."

He laughed, and it almost sent a shiver down your spine, you're sure that's the laugh many children have heard as they beg for their parents.

"I was just evening out the odds, nothing wrong about that." He grinned. "Ketterdam might just eat them alive because of it though."

Fury flashed through you, yet instead of slashing his throat right in that moment like Inej would have done, like Kaz would have finished, rather you took his throat in between your hand.

He chocked, and his eyes widened when you tightened it.

"Mercy!" He managed to chock out, the words barely leaving his purple lips.

You would grab him with an iron fist and show him what your mercy is.

What Ketterdam's mercy is.

Using your other, free hand you twirled the dagger in it and the title Inej had given you through it glared back at you, then you plunged it into his thigh.

He tried to scream but it was muffled by the hand around his throat.

"That was for my treasure Inej, she wouldn't have wanted you to suffer much."

You pulled it out and before he could even attempt to scream again you sliced open his face.

"And that." You grunted through gritted teeth. "Was for my lovely Kaz, he would have wanted you to suffer, very much."

Releasing the hand on his throat he tried to break away from your grip, but you held him down and put the dagger against his throat for the last time.

"I am Ketterdam's ruler, and this is my mercy."

Then you cut his throat.

You didn't bother to watch him chock on his own blood before you were out the window, checking your watch. You were so late, and dressed like a servant nonetheless.

Yet, the disappointment, the fury at yourself for finding yet another thing lacking that your lovers had that you did not, didn't come. You have protected your own tonight, you've sent a message to all who listen closely to the whispers of drunken shadows and barrel rats. You were Ketterdam's ruler, you ranked far above Inej and Kaz and would do anything to protect them.

The three of you were equals in this game, but when it came to their safety you had the ultimate say over this filthy city. You are Ketterdam's ruler, you keep her on line when she gets too wild, and let her off her leash when people need to pay their dues.

Like Ethan Sullivan, and you think there will be others still, that's alright with you. They will be no match for your mercy.

Words 1343

-thedelusionreaderbitch

Grishaverse taglist: @kaqua @rika90 @thefandomplace @musical-theatre-obsessed-dumbass @gallysonegoodlung @navs-bhat @sumsebien @dontjudgeabookbythecover @brekker-zenik @alohastitch0626 @brekkers-desigirl @emmsamultifan06

[buriedbehindtheshed]

Fixing a Broken Wing. Kaz Brekker x GN!reader

Word count: 1419 Warnings: Minor injury description. A/N: Thought I'd start posting here as well as Ao3! Hope y'all like it. We need more gn fics. No pronouns or y/n are used for the reader! There aren't many physical descriptions either!

The frigid air was harsh on the looming city of Ketterdam. Nightfall broke on the horizon, and the tapping of a cane echoed from an open window. The usual ruckus of the Barrel was dimmed by the racing thoughts of a singular slimy bastard: Kaz Brekker.

You were an investment of his–A sly one from the Menagerie. Your silent nature and singing blades kept you labeled as an honorary Crow. You were sent on a venture for Heleen, but you were supposed to meet back with Kaz at dawn. Since dawn, Kaz had waited.

And waited. 

And waited.

An unfamiliar prickle ghosted the back of Kaz's neck as hours flew by without a whisper of you. You were never late–not for him. The corner of his lip curled into a humorless smirk. Was he so blind to have faith in Heleen to consider keeping you safe?

With impeccable timing, a soft thump came from inside his bedroom. The thumping was followed by a low croak; Kaz could've sworn you were just a large toad. You harnessed the rest of your strength to push yourself up, just enough to slump against the wall.

Kaz paced towards the bedroom, his familiar hobbled steps echoing on the wooden floors. "You're late. You better have a damned good reason for falling behind. I'd like my investments close at hand," His familiar rasp grumbled. As he approached the room, he let his eyes fixate on you. His eyes were like flint as he observed your physical state, his gaze flickering over all of your wounds with expert precision. Your tale had been a messy one, it seemed.

Silently, Kaz stalked toward you, kneeling to your level. He pressed the silver crow's skull of his cane to your chin, tilting your head lightly, cataloging each wound with a veteran's eye. Slashes, bruises, wounds - all painted a sordid story across your flesh. "Heleen?" He asked, nearly deadly silent.

You parted your cracked, bloodied lips to speak, but nothing came out. Your throat was rough and raw. You simply nodded, swallowing thickly as your eyes threatened to close. Luckily, Kaz's cane supported your chin. If your head began to lull, he would use it to angle it back up.

Kaz scowled. No one would hurt one of his own. He always made sure of it. "You survived. That's all that matters." Reaching into an inner pocket, he plucked a small vial from it. He held it to your cracked lips, his voice leaving no room for denial. "Drink. It will help your throat." And perhaps loosen your tongue enough for you to share more. Heleen could wait; his prized weapon came first.

You took in a shaky breath, parting your lips and tilting your head up. You drank the amber-tinted liquid, your face contorting into disgust as it hit your tongue. "Saints, boss, what the hell is that?" You groan, still holding the liquid in your mouth.

A ghost of amusement flickered in Kaz's eyes to see your disgusted reaction, fleeting as quickly as it came. "Effective medicine tastes of punishment," Kaz replied flatly in his salt-bitten rasp. "Consider it penance for troubling me with putting you back together. Now swallow." He uncorked a waterskin from his belt to wash away the bitter taste of ginger and cloves. He held it to your lips, tilting your chin up with his cane. His cold gaze studied your face with keen precision, filing each of your hurts.

Your heart pangs with guilt at Kaz's words. You swallowed the liquid begrudgingly. It stung your throat momentarily before a cooling sensation washed over the tender flesh. You made fleeting eye contact with him, and you swear you felt your stomach twist. "I went to meet with a client near the harbor... I think the old witch wanted to be rid of me," You hissed through bloodied teeth. "I should've known it was trouble. I could hear the rustling of Kruge." You met Kaz's eye again, and as he took a sharp breath in to speak, you blurt out: "Please don't send me back."

He listened to your story in chilling silence. Heleen was a traitorous worm in Kaz’s eyes. Ice ran through his veins as you murmured your broken tale, freezing over some long-forgotten well of mercy. When you finished, he opened his mouth to speak but froze when you interrupted him with a shaky plea. "You won't be," He whispered. The ghost of the broken boy gazed out at you through Kaz's eyes, understanding the unspoken between you two. "I wouldn't send you back if my life depended on it." 

Kaz rose in one fluid motion, looming over you like the vengeful raven his reputation had painted. His cane slipped from beneath your chin, causing your head to drop slightly. He stalked over to the small sink across the room and filled a ceramic bowl with water. Gloved hands darted around, grabbing various rags and containers. He moved back to you slowly and silently, gingerly placing the items on the floor beside you. Then, he slipped off his coat and neatly laid it down on the railing of his bed frame. He knelt once more, quick hands soaking the rag.

The silence between the two of you was deafening. Kaz’s slow, shaking breaths would slice through it occasionally, putting your mind at ease. He wrung out the excess water from the cloth and, with a trembling hand, he pressed it to a wound on your forehead. His care for your well-being seemed to trump his fears about getting too close to you. You grunt quietly as he cleans your injuries, but he makes no attempt to be any gentler. 

He put the cloth back in the water and rinsed out the crimson substance that’d once coated it. You couldn’t help but notice his encased fingertips never broke the water’s surface in the bowl – A trick he must’ve learned all these years. His dark hair fell over his forehead as he angled his head down to clean off the rag. 

He drew a handkerchief from his vest pocket and lifted a small earthenware jar from the floor. In a swift motion, he unscrewed the top and set it on the ground before dipping the cloth into the contents – a soothing salve developed from hard-won experience to ease battered flesh. With a sharp breath, he leaned a bit closer, smearing the substance into your wound.

It stung … and stunk. Your nose scrunches as the scent burns your nostrils. “What is it with you and foul medicine?” You manage to grumble before he silences you with an icy glare through his eyelashes. 

“Would you rather be infected?” Replied Kaz, arching an eyebrow at you.

“No.” You stare back at him.

“Figured,” He whispered, the corner of his lip tugging into what most would consider a lesser frown, and to you, a smile. “You’re no use to me damaged.”

Kaz’s hands soon lowered as he finished coating your wounds in the substance. He leaned back immediately and scanned over your face once more. He took in a slow breath before he stood once more. “I will leave these with you to work on any other areas my eyes can’t touch,” He murmured. “I will leave you the room.”

Your eyes follow his form as he stands and runs a hand through his hair. His dark eyes flicker over you with a softer expression now—something underlying. “Very well,” You murmur.

As he turns to exit the room, he pauses and calls your name.

You turn to meet his gaze once more. “Yes?”

“The Crows will carry your name as they do mine,” He rasped. “No force in this world will send you back against your will. You have my word.”

You felt your stomach twist at his words. Your chest was swelling with warmth, or perhaps you were bleeding internally. Your wall was breaking. It was dangerous. 

“Thank you, Kaz.” His name rolled off your tongue so easily like honey dripping onto warm bread. You rarely used Kaz’s name – You always opted for ‘boss’ or ‘Brekker.’ At this moment, however, Kaz deserved to be Kaz.

Kaz’s upper lip twitched slightly as you spoke his name. He felt his breath catch in his throat, hearing the way it so easily slipped from your mouth. He tightened his hand around the silver crow handle of his cane. “Rest,” He murmured before he made his swift exit, leaving you alone in the warm lamplight of his bedroom.

[despairots]

someone write a miles morales or hobie brown oneshot with the lipstick trend where you smeared your lipstick and they wipe it off of you, turning your camera around and showing them like PLEASE 🙏 (or i might do it myself but im working on another work)

[chaosofmanyfandoms]

I'm currently going to be writing six of crows/shadow and bone winter oneshots if anybody has any requests! Also since it's Christmas time, I'd love to write for bernard from the santa clause movies aswell!

[liliumsabyss]

In The Small Moments

Pt1, Part 2, Pt 3, Pt 4, Pt 5…

Kaz Brekker x Gn Reader

Summary: Moulin Rouge/Satine Inspired!Reader and Kaz go undercover at a ball only for things to go terribly wrong.

Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48845809/chapters/123220936

Word Count: 856 (I think)

Tw: Angst and Fluff, Swearing, Mentions of Sex, Mentions of Sex Work, No Smut, Mentions of Death, Forced Marriage, Manipulation, PTSD, reader called handsome but could be interrupted as in the old timey gender neutral way, maybe OOC Kaz Brekker, also potentially could be interpreted as suicidal ideation, mentions of suicide, Characters are like 25-ish and Pekka Rollins

A/n: sorry y’all I’ve had this for awhile and posted

The heist had gone successfully. The crows had gotten what they needed as they waited back at the base for Kaz and (Y/n) who were to take a carriage back to meet them. It was silent as they only sat around the flat boredly. Jesper leaned back in his chair throwing a pouch that was full of kruge into the air catching it repeatedly huffing impatiently.

“ So…” Jesper finally started “ What do ya think about the boss and (Y/n).”

“ Think about what?” Wylan asked, confused looking up from his book on thermodynamics, titling his head towards his boyfriend scrunching his eyebrows.

“ Y’a know the whole mutual pining thing.” Jesper responded waving his arms around acting like it was the most obvious thing, the bag of kruge rattling as he did so. The rest had just stopped what they were doing, staring at Jesper in various ways from confusion to annoyance  to shock at his bluntness of the situation that none of them dared speak of. Nina clicked her tongue shaking her head.

“ What?! You know I'm right!” The sharpshooter exclaimed when Nina gave him a sharp glare at his 

“ Hell I’d even bet that (Y/n) will confess any day now” He continued as the healer just scoffed and Jesper rolled his eyes.

“ You want to put money on that?” Nina quipped, shocking everyone else in the room, Jesper quickly recovered smirking as he nodded his head confidently.

“ 20 kruge that (Y/n) confesses first,” The sharpshooter spoke confidently.

“ And 50 Kruge that Kaz confesses first, if you're right I will even add in an extra 50 kruge.” Nina replies back, shrugging her shoulders, picking at her fingernails.

“ Damn 70 Kruge, you got yourself a deal” Jesper says, winking only to be interrupted by the sound of the door slamming open, he staggers in his seat nearly falling backwards. Kaz walks through the door, his expression more bitter and hostile than usual. He leans against the doorway grasping slightly at his leg before pushing against the door and limping inside. Nina quickly got up, shutting the door to prevent the cold night air from wafting in. The leader of the crows settled in his seat taking a shaky breath out.

“ Where is (Y/n)?” Inej questioned cautiously from where she sat in the darkest corner of the room. The others all stared cautiously but expectantly at Kaz.

“ I do not know. I asked one of the guards on the way out and they were seen with Pekka.” Kaz spoke darkly as he stared daggers into the floor, clenching his fists so tightly he could feel his fingernails pressing through his gloves.

“ Jesper,” Kaz barked “ I want everything on them you can find.”

Jesper stood up quickly loading his revolver and stuffing it into his belt as he hurried off out of the slat barely saying goodbye to Wylan by giving him a swift kiss on the cheek. The door of the slat shut creaking as the rest set in silence.

“Inej-” Kaz started his voice just as harsh to Jesper but aimed toward Inej, a tone that almost never would be used towards her. Inej who already had her daggers stored in their sheethes on her belt and her hood up, interrupted the currently infuriated male.

“ Already on it.” She gave a firm nod to accompany her response as she left swiftly and quietly like always.

Wylan and Nina quietly observed Kaz as he stood unmoving, his jaw clenched, his fists angrily snapped closed, his breath increased in its heaving. The three remained in near silence as the pair cautiously backed out of the room giving the man his space. 

The only question that crossed Kaz Brekker’s mind was Why had he trusted you, why had he let his inhibitions down for you out of all people. Just look where that got him. His mind spiralled and he let it because more times or not betrayal had been the result of someone or something he trusted. But of course his bad luck had run its course again with you. And of course Kaz Brekker being Kaz Brekker assumed the worst of you, only briefly did the notion that you may have been taken against your will flash across his thoughts. But even then he still wouldn't fully believe you hadn’t betrayed him until he saw full evidence. He sat like that until the moonlight slowly floated away and the rays of early dawn illuminated the foggy streets. The door to the slat creaked open figure slipped in his coat flowing behind him as he entered the room at the same time Kaz stood up his eyebags much more prominent making large dark circles under his eyes, his hair dishevelled from running his hands through it, and his skin a sickly shade of pale. Jesper slid past him sitting in one of the wooden chairs creaking alongside the floorboards which creaked when Wylan and Nina came in at the same time as neither looked well rested. In fact none of the people in that room looked rested.

“Well I found out about our little friend…”

[j-did-reading]

i absolutely adore this!!! the relationship between kaz and the reader feels so natural but still so in line with his character!! <333

both this part and part 2 are so well written and consistently make me giggle, whether it’s from the interactions between the two, or the reactions from the other crows. thank you for writing this!!

"Four Crows Investigation" - Kaz Brekker x Reader

[vulgar language]

[Part 2 - Lovebirds' Outfox]

☽ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ☾

Enjoying my work? You can leave me a tip on Ko-Fi

SUMMARY: After Nina makes a passing comment about Brekker’s heartbeat, three crows join her in an investigation to uncover the true nature of your relationship with Kaz.

WORDCOUNT: ~ 1.4k

>>Grishaverse-inspired playlist&lt;<

Sitting around the table, leaning forward in a secretive manner, the four Crows look nothing short of a conspiracy. Their appearance is in no way deceptive - that’s exactly the reason for their meeting. Nina looks between Jesper’s and Wylan’s shoulders, checking whether you and Kaz are in any way suspicious of their gathering. For now, you look a little too preoccupied with each other. Time for the final conference.

The Heartrender leans even further towards her friends, looking between them with a questioning gaze. She seems to be the most excited about this ‘secretive investigation’, as she called it a week ago, but that should not come as a surprise - all of this has been her idea from start to finish. The moment she noticed Kaz’s heartbeat significantly pick up when you showed up in a ball gown in an attempt to mix in with the immorally wealthy crowd at the banquet, Nina simply had to know more. Her friends, although reluctant at first, joined the scheme out of their own meddling.

“So, what did you manage to find out?” She’s trying to keep her voice quiet but the sheer excitement makes it difficult.

“I still don’t understand why we’re doing this,” Wylan stutters out while shaking his head gently. He may be part of a crime syndicate now but spying on his friends, and his boss, just seems too far.

“Because we care about them?” Jesper asks with fake worry in his voice. Then, a devious smile appears on his face. “And we’re morbidly curious.”

“Can’t we just ask them, then?”

“As if either of them is going to say something,” Inej grunts. Knowing both of you fairly well, she never expected a straightforward question to get anything outside of a snarky comment or a side-eye.

Nina impatiently taps her hand on the table. “Alright, who goes first?”

╚ Jesper’s Evidence  ╝

He knows Kaz is going to get angry the moment he walks through the door but, at the same time, Jesper’s kind of out of options. As much as he hates to admit it to himself and definitely will not do it aloud, he’s facing an impasse.

The moment he pushes the door open, your and Kaz’s eyes snap towards him. He makes a note of your shoulders - brushing against one another as you’re standing over scattered papers, a little too close for practicality or for the closeness to be accredited to accident. You’re definitely giving the impression that he walked in at an inconvenient moment.

But Jesper is good at bluffing, never giving away that he noticed the thought-provoking lack of space between you. “Carliogne won’t talk unless he sees the contract you signed with Bruglione,” he informs. “His reasoning is that we’re probably trying to fuck him over.”

Kaz stares at him for a moment with an unreadable expression. “We are,” he finally answers.

“Well, he doesn’t need to know that for now, does he?”

“It makes sense,” you speak up. Pondering, you nod to yourself. “If he sees the contract, he’ll become less cautious and playing him should be even easier. Just wait a second,” you wave your hand at Jesper, “I think I put it in the bottom drawer.”

The moment you crouch behind the desk, Jesper’s eyes catch movement - Kaz is covering the edge of the table over your head with his hand. Considering that he’s looking at papers in the opposite direction, he might not even be aware of this little habit. The gunslinger stifles a smile. Nina is going to love this.

Soon, you stand back up at the protective hand reaches to flip through a wad of documents as though nothing has happened. Extending your arm towards Jesper, you offer him the folded contract between your two fingers.

“Please, don’t get it stained.”

“Can’t make promises,” he says with a cheeky smile as he snatches the paper from you.

Jesper hears your groan right before he closes the door behind himself.

╚ Wylan’s Evidence  ╝

Wylan rarely got ‘field work’ aside from setting up explosives. The out-of-ordinary occasions were stake-outs, when he’d sit in one place for hours on end waiting for something to happen, having only Jesper’s company to pass the time - not that there’s anything wrong with that. In fact, that’s the only part that makes those ‘patrol duties’ bearable.

 Although he feels uneasy creepily watching, he’s supposed to wait for an agreed-on sign to carry out his part in the plan. And with Jesper gone to the bathroom, the responsibility of staying vigilant is his only. Sitting on the carriage bench, he has a good view of the street but most of his attention surrounds a certain table at a boulangerie near the junction. You and Kaz are doing a great job at looking common - just drinking coffee, chatting, completely run-of-the-mill people and definitely not hardened criminals ready to call their companions to action when their prey is in sight.

Wylan suddenly sits up, hardly believing the scene unfolding before his eyes: you offer Kaz your bagel and he just… bites it. No glares, no scowls, he just takes a bite and you continue the conversation. Maybe Nina was right and something is up.

The carriage shakes slightly as Jesper gets back on it. “What did I miss?” he asks in an upbeat voice.

╚ Inej’s Evidence ╝

It’s the middle of the night but Inej rarely works at other times. Only one thing stands between her and the comfort of her bed - Kaz. She’s well-aware that he’s still going to be working at this hour, making her wonder once more: when does he rest?

Kaz seems to be expecting her as he doesn’t even flinch when she barges into his office. He just looks up at her for a moment, only to return to writing something. Inej is about to tell him what Lorenzzo Carliogne had been up to during the day, when her eyes focus on a surprising singularity: the daybed standing in the corner of the office, used as an additional shelf or a desk most of the time, is occupied. First, she realizes that it’s you sleeping on it but then another, a much more interesting detail, catches her eye in the dim candlelight of the room - you’re covered with a coat that undoubtedly looks like it belongs to Kaz.

“I take it there’s a reason you’re here at this hour?” Brekker brings her attention back to himself.

“Yes,” she starts, sparing you one last glance before looking at Kaz, “Carliogne lives with his wife and three children. Staff comes in through a separate pair of doors, only the main chef and butler have keys to it. There’s a rotation in guards during lunch.”

“Good,” he answers. Kaz looks up at Inej but again, it’s just for a moment - his focus is soon directed at the papers in front of him.

A silence falls. The thought to inquire about you, the daybed and his coat passes her thoughts but an instinct dissuades her from doing so. Because realistically, what sort of answer would Kaz give her anyway? It’s better to spare herself the snark and just go to bed.

The four friends look between each other, curious whether all of them came to the same conclusion. Tense excitement hangs in the air. There is a certain aspect of juvenile nosyness that entices them, making this whole over-the-top operation fun and not just a gossip convention.

A pout twists Nina’s face. It would have looked sad if it wasn’t for her raised eyebrows, making her expression more compassionate than woeful. “They’re so in love it’s kind of embarrassing,” she announces.

Three pairs of eyes follow her pitiful gaze to the faraway table where you’re sitting with Kaz, oblivious to the interest the Crows have in you. It looks like you’re retelling him a story, gesturing wildly with one of your hands, while the other is kept on the table, underneath his gloved fingers. Kaz is just nodding along, answering something shortly from time to time. 

“Just look at them,” Jesper says with a sense of misguided pride as though he had some contribution in the makings of the couple. He’s shaking his head with amusement. “How could we ever had any doubts?”

“Do you think they know that we know?” Wylan asks quietly.

Inej shrugs. “I don’t think they care.”

[swanimagines]

Hey!! Can I get D11 with Kaz Brekker, please? Thank you!!

Prompt: D11. Books

TWO FOOLS

When Kaz had suddenly invited you to one of the warehouses he owned that morning, you didn’t really know what to expect. Jesper joked that if he didn’t know it was Kaz, it’d sound like he’s going to propose to you. And to be honest, that’s what crossed your mind too first. But you had only been properly together for a few months, surely he wouldn't ask you anything like that, at least not yet. And you hadn’t actually agreed to date, Kaz wasn’t that kind of person who would actually call himself your boyfriend or ask you to date him. It was enough that you knew he loved you. You had been friends since little kids, you had first met him before the whole Jakob Hertzoon-Pekka Rollins case. Jordie had liked you and teased Kaz who apparently had formed a crush on you from first sight. 

But getting to this position, actually knowing he loved you and was devoted to you was a whole different story. Kaz showed little gestures of affection every once in a while, but he had turned oddly secretive the moment you told him that there’s a bunch of books that you’d like to read but you either can’t find them anywhere or can’t afford them. And now, a few days from that, Kaz had left you a note, slid it under your door. Meet me at the warehouse I acquired recently, the one that’s two streets from the Slat.

But when you made your way to the warehouse Kaz had pointed you to, the sight that greeted you when he opened the door left you speechless.

Books. A whole library of them. Different sections, genres, sorted out by author. Some shelves were still empty, but others were full to the brim. At the empty wall, there was a large couch and one of Kaz’s treasured DeKappels hanging over it. Or it was likely a replica because he would never let a DeKappel out of his sight for long periods unless it was in his office. But even so, Kaz doing that all by himself would have taken weeks.

You gaped at the sight for a moment longer before you turned to look at Kaz, who had a small smirk on his face. “How did you–”

“I used a few favors. People were happy to pay their debt off by… donating to this and working with transforming this old place. It was leaking and it also was freezing, so I hired a few Fabrikators to make sure this stays warm and they consulted a Tidemaker to help make sure the roof no longer leaks.” He cocked his head, running his hand over one empty shelf, frowning at the dust on his glove. “I thought I made it clear this should be clean enough to see your reflection, but there’s always some idiots who don’t listen. I will call them back later. But otherwise it’s yours to use.”

You felt like kissing him and you would have, if your relationship was in that stage. “This all just for me? You did this all for… just me?”

He didn’t look at you, letting his eyes wander around the space, clearly proud of his little surprise. “You and anyone you decide to bring here.”

“Kaz, I…” You turned to him, your eyes still wide. “This is probably the nicest and the most romantic thing someone has ever done for me.”

His eyes flickered to you briefly, and he grunted. “I realised that a… relationship like ours needs me to contribute too and not just you.”

You chuckled and shook your head. “Inej told you that, didn’t she?”

He didn’t reply. You heard the leather of his gloves creaking as he adjusted his grip on his cane, before he spoke again. “Most people think I’m a rotten case.”

You huffed. “You’re not.”

“You’re a fool for actually believing that.”

“That makes us two fools, then.”

Kaz fell silent again, and you stepped closer, fiddling with his sleeve. “But you’re my favourite fool.”

He didn’t reply again, but you knew what he wanted to say from the way he looked at you.

And you are mine.

You knew he wasn’t ready for such endearments spoken out loud, but you knew how he felt about you. You weren’t a heartender, nor were you any other kind of a Grisha, but you just understood each other that way.

And you were perfectly fine with that. Because what you had was special.

Requests are open! FANDOM LIST | PROMPT LIST(S) | RULES (READ!!!)

[er-osion]

My Tears Ricochet

pairing:  Kaz Brekker x gn!Reader

summary:  A fic inspired by Taylor Swift’s ‘My Tears Ricochet’.  Kaz says some things to you in anger after a heist so you end things and move out of the Slat.  Months later and Kaz can no longer bear being separated

word count:  2.6k

warnings:  hurt/comfort

you can see the full taylor swift song-fic masterlist here

⋄∘∗⋅⋆≁≁⋆⋅∗∘⋄

The door to Kaz’s room slammed shut.  You tried not to wince at the noise, tried not to move lest you show how upset and afraid you were.  Things had gone bad, really bad.  The heist should’ve been simple but sometimes things just don’t go to plan, sometimes human error messes things up.  Now you stood in the room you shared with Kaz, bracing for him to give you hell for the awful night all of you had had.

“Do you just want to see your teammates die?”  Kaz snapped, back turned to you as he paced around the room.

“What kind of question is that, Kaz?”  You spat back, offended.  “Things go wrong, we’re all human.”

“That’s one of the weakest excuses I’ve heard for inadequacy in a long time.”

Your eyes went wide, “Inadequacy?!”  You repeated, aghast.  “Watch it, Brekker.”

Kaz let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head and running his fingers through his hair.  “If you don’t want to be called ‘inadequate’, don’t do foolish things, you behaved like a rookie tonight!”

“The others have made mistakes just as bad, if not worse before, yet when I do it it’s the crime of the century?”  You threw your hands in the air, tone quickly rising to meet his anger.

“No, this heist could’ve been the heist of the century if you hadn’t royally fucked it up!”

“Kaz, I know you’re upset, we all are.  But yelling at me won’t change the events of the evening, it will only make things worse.”

“Oh don’t try and get all ‘holier than thou’ on me.  You don’t want to get yelled at?  Then don’t act like a fucking idiot.”

You blinked back tears of frustration and hurt.  You and Kaz had had your fair share of arguments, being in a relationship with someone who didn’t know how to express their feelings properly can lead to that.  But his behavior was out of pocket and undeserved.  He was supposed to be your biggest supporter, not tear you down. 

The argument raged for another two hours, growing worse and worse by the minute until you’d had enough.

“Kaz, shut the fuck up!”  You cried.  “I’m done!”

He froze, fury overtaking his expression before he took a step back and blinked.  “What?”  His voice was grating.

“I’m done.”  You repeated in a hush, throat and chest tightening impossibly.

“The hell do you mean, ‘you’re done’?”  

“I mean I’m done with this, with us.”  You concluded defeatedly.  Kaz didn’t say anything, his expression didn’t change, as if he hadn’t truly understood what you were saying or the implication of your statement.  “I can’t be with someone who’s going to degrade me for making human mistakes.  We’re supposed to help one another, not demean each other and if you still don’t understand that after all of these years… then I think my time is better spent elsewhere.”

You straightened your back and rolled your shoulders in an attempt to pull yourself together despite the tears blurring your vision.  You waited for Kaz to say something, anything. The silence was deafening.

“If you want to be a quitter then fine, quit.  I don’t need someone who behaves like this anyways.”  Kaz hissed, turning his back to you as he was no longer able to look at your distraught face.  

You puffed in disbelief.  Your heart was burning.  How could he so easily throw you away?  Throw everything the two of you had built together away?  You shook your head and began gathering your things.  You could feel Kaz watching you out of the corner of his eye but he never moved from his spot and never said anything.

When you’d finished gathering your belongings you scurried out of the room, needing more than anything to be out of that suffocating atmosphere.  You decided to stay with a friend going to university.  He asked no questions when you had showed up at his door in the middle of the night with all of your things, just let you in and helped you settle into the guest room.

When you woke up, mid afternoon the next day, your friend, Arthur, assured you that you could stay as long as you needed.  The next few months were torture for you.  This sick feeling in your stomach never went away and your chest never stopped hurting.  Merely eating, breathing, and moving became a task.  All motivation to do anything left your body and you wandered around your friend’s apartment like a ghost.  Nothing felt right, not anymore.  Kaz had always told you that your fighting spirit had made you brave, had inspired him, yet he was so quick to turn it against you.  The tears you cried over that man were endless.

****

Kaz has been a worn wood boat against the raging sea of his emotions these past few months.  He’d been off his grove, on edge, messy, and all the Crows had noticed.  To put it simply: Kaz Brekker had been a wreck of a man since the night you broke up with him.  Nothing was the same, nothing was tolerable anymore.

Everywhere he went, you haunted him.  Your ghost and the ghost of your relationship taunted him in spectral defiance, proving how small of a man he was.  He still wears the rings you’d gotten him underneath his gloves, he couldn’t bear to part from them.  The nicknacks you’d given him over the years that he kept scattered around his office and bedroom stayed in the same spots because he was too scared to get rid of them.  Because getting rid of those nicknacks and the rings meant putting a real end to that chapter of his life. 

He had spent the last few months cursing you, everything you’d ever brought to his life, your memory.  Because being angry was easier than being hurt.  But still, he missed you more than anything.  Saints, he missed you so much it hurt.  No injury could ever compare to the pain in his chest that had been stabbing at him since you walked out the door.  When you’d left, you had carved out a piece of him and took it with you.  There was so much empty space in Kaz’s soul he had to put daily effort in not getting lost in it.

Kaz hadn’t seen a trace of you since you’d left.  He couldn’t decide if that was a bad or good thing.  But tonight, he couldn’t handle it.  These past few months have been unbearably painful, this hole in his heart was no longer ignorable.  He knew he probably didn’t have a chance at reconciliation.  Hell, he probably didn’t deserve a second chance with you.  But Dirtyhands didn’t give up without a fight.  So he decided to find you, talk to you, and try to convey his all-consuming regret.  And if you wanted to move on, then he’d respect that.  Because that’s the very least he could do for you.

It wasn’t hard to figure out where you were.  You didn’t cover your trails and Kaz had an excellent recon team.  But when Inej told him you were staying with some friend from university named Arthur?  The cane-wielding young man almost threw the papers off his desk.  He’s ashamed to admit it, but the jealousy that instantly bubbled in his stomach burned and churned all the unpleasantness he’d been feeling lately into a monstrous wave.  If that good-for-nothing had tried at all to swoop in and replace Kaz in your life, this “Arthur” would learn how Kaz got the name Dirtyhands.

And that’s how Kaz found himself outside of this stranger’s apartment, standing out in the wet cold, unable to bring his gloved hand up to knock on the door.  He’d chosen a time in the evening when he knew your new roommate would be absent for a while, Kaz wanted zero interruptions during whatever was about to go down.

You were torn away from your book when you heard a sharp knock at the door.  Confused, you slowly got up and went to open the door only to reveal the very last person you expected to see tonight.

You stared at Kaz for a long while before beginning coldly, “What do you want?”

Kaz internally flinched at your tone.  “I’d like to talk.”

“Do you want to talk to me or yell at me?”  You retorted, feeling petty.

Kaz screwed his lips shut to keep himself from saying anything stupid, “Talk.”  He reiterated.

You looked him over before stepping aside, wordlessly letting him in.  Kaz strode inside the apartment hastily, observing the space with a critical eye.  “So you’ve been staying with your friend, Alex?”  He purposefully asked incorrectly.

“Arthur.  And yes, he’s been incredibly kind and understanding of my situation.”  You rebuked.

“Not too kind, I’m sure.”

“You have no reason to care.”  You painfully reminded him.  Kaz didn’t say anything, knowing you were right.  Kaz stalked around the main room, pretending to take a great interest in the decor as he tried miserably to plan what to say next.  You watched him move about, scrutinizing his every move and waiting for him to speak up.  You weren’t sure why he was here, but if he wanted to apologize then it would have to be in his own words.

“I…”  Kaz started but then trailed off, unsure of what exactly to say.  The dark haired man sighed, his mind exhausted with frustration, and plopped down on the couch.  You stood unmoving from your spot in the center of the room, still watching and waiting with a raised brow.  “I came to tell you that you didn’t deserve to be yelled at the way I yelled at you.  Even on your worst days you’d never deserve to be treated the way I treated you.”

You blinked in surprise, Kaz was never an openly apologetic person and you could tell he was unfamiliar with this area of communication by the way he stumbled over his words.  You moved closer sitting in the chair opposite him.  You could tell he still had more to say so you nodded at him, silently letting him know to continue.

Kaz took a steadying breath and readjusted his grip on his cane.  “I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that, I shouldn’t have let you walk out the door.  I can’t sleep at night, all I hear are your whispers.  I can’t keep moving about my day without at least trying to repair things between us.  Even if you don’t want to return to the way we were, I needed to tell you… all of this.”

Your throat tightened and you clutched desperately onto your pant legs for some grounding.  Your mind was spinning.  You wanted to still be angry with him, you wanted to yell at him and berate him.  But here he was, the man you loved sitting in front of you, apologizing, expressing regret over his actions, and telling you he’ll respect whatever decision you make after tonight.

“You hurt me Kaz.  You know how to weaponize words and you turned your stockpile against me and we’re supposed to be allies.”

“I know, I know and I’ll hate that memory for the rest of my life.  I’m a deplorable man, but the last thing I ever want to do is hurt you, and I can’t begin to describe the discontent I’ve felt after that night.”

You looked down at your hands, no longer able to maintain eye contact with Kaz with the way he was looking so intensely at you.  “I… I don’t know where to go from here Kaz.”  You admitted honestly.

“I’m not quite sure either.  But,”  Kaz paused, trying to gauge your reaction to his next words, “we could start by moving you back into the Slat.”

Your gaze snapped back up to the brown-eyed man in front of you, heart stuttering in your chest.  “With you?”  You questioned, voice shakier than you’d intended.

“Preferably.”  Kaz confirmed.

You looked Kaz up and down, scanning his face over and over for any sign that he was just messing with you, just trying to get your hopes up before brutally smashing them down again.  But all you could find was ground-shaking sincerity.  Fear and reverence swirled in his coffee-eyes and it knocked the wind out of you.

You took a weak breath in.  Maybe you weren’t strong, but the man you’d loved for years was sitting there trying to reconcile and you weren’t going to lie and say you weren’t ready to jump at the idea.  You didn’t want to give up on the two of you.  Kaz Brekker was your everything, is your everything.  You can’t imagine your life without him in it, so yeah, you were going to try again with him.  If things didn’t work out this time, then you’d take the hint and start the process of moving on.  But you were determined to work things out, because Kaz was here telling you just the same and you’d be damned if you didn’t take this opportunity.

“It’s going to take a bit for me to readjust to us.  I want to try again Kaz, start over.  I want us to work because I believe in us, I believe in you.”  You uttered seriously and Kaz’s breath hitched at your words.  He felt hope again, for the first time in ages he felt bright shining hope and restored vigor.

“I’ll give you all the time you need and more.  I’ll give you whatever you need, all you have to do is ask.  I don’t mean to let us die without a bare-knuckle fight.  I’ll dig up the corpse of us and pull our ghost from the depths of the Underworld if that means we can get a second chance.”  Kaz fervently promised, leaning so far forward he was barely sitting on the edge of his seat anymore.  You smiled at his goreish analogy, always the dramatic Kaz Brekker even when trying to repair your relationship.

You nodded and sighed contentedly.  “I won’t let us die without a fight either– but be warned; if you ever disrespect me like that again, I’ll rip you a new one Brekker.”  You warned with a playful smirk tugging at your lips.

Kaz made a noise between a scoff and a laugh, “I fully expect you to, but I won’t be giving you a reason to ever do so.”  You grinned with satisfaction at his words, getting up from your chair and telling him to stay put as you gathered your things. 

You waited for Arthur to come back before leaving the apartment, so you could explain the situation to him.  He was more than happy for you, glad to see you in any mood other than depressed for the first time in ages.  You made Kaz stand in the hall for the interaction, as you noticed your friend growing quickly uncomfortable with Kaz’s searing glare.

Before you knew it, you were back in the Slat with the love of your life.  You seamlessly melded right back into his space and Kaz could finally breathe freely again.  Things were right, they were the way they were supposed to be now that the two of you were back together again.  Kaz had never felt such a sense of relief as he did watching you settle down for bed in your shared room.  Kaz Brekker was no man of faith, but he swore to every Saint above that he’d never take you for granted or disrespect you ever again, lest he die a painful and humiliating death.  He didn’t deserve your second chances or forgiveness, but he’d work every day to try and deserve it, to be the partner you deserved.

[cyberstrm]

exposure therapy

show!kaz brekker x gn!reader

cws: kaz's trauma but not explicit details, spicy making out (?)

"are you sure you want to do this?" you ask gently, your hands pressed against kaz's clothed chest. he was avoiding your gaze, breathing deeply, as if preparing for something unbearable. his dark eyes met yours, and he softened.

"yes, i'm sure."

you and kaz brekker's relationship was, for lack of a better term, complicated. trying to be intimate or romantic with someone who despised physical touch was difficult, but you truly loved kaz, and so was willing to put up with it in the short term. but kaz could see it bothered you, and had to admit even to himself that he craved your touch, so you both decided that the best way for him to get over it was to just do it in a safe environment until it felt okay for him.

you were sat on his lap behind his desk, your legs straddling his waist. kaz shakily removed his gloves, and tossed them aside. he looked raw, vulnerable, like an open wound.

"you ready?" you whispered, lifting your shirt up slightly to reveal the skin of your waist and hips. kaz stared hungrily for a few moments, before tentatively placing his fingertips on your skin. slowly, he added more, until his cool palms were pressed against you. he was breathing in a controlled manor, but you could tell it took effort. he moved his hands around smoothly, taking you in fully.

"y/n, i..." he began, his mouth dry. you wondered for a moment if he was going to back out.

"yes?" you asked.

he looked up at you again, a hunger in his eyes you'd not yet seen. "kiss me."

you blinked. you'd never kissed kaz brekker before. you'd wanted to, but he'd never condoned it. you supposed the exposure therapy was working.

you reached your hand up onto his cheek, and he leaned into your palm, his eyes fluttering close. you kissed him gently, your lips warm against his cold skin. he didn't kiss back at first, but slowly his mouth opened, and he took you in. his hands gripped your hips, pulling you further onto him. when you pulled away, you were blushing furiously.

"that's...that's enough, for today." kaz panted, removing his hands from your skin.

"o-okay." you replied drowsily. you lifted yourself from him and turned away, too flustered to face him. you heard him stand and reapply his gloves, before hearing the cane's tap on the floor, and the office door shutting behind you.

[thedelusionreaderbitch]

Poly! Kanej x gn! Reader - Always Darkness (PRIDE 2023)

A/n: Happy pride everyone! Enjoy the 3rd installment to the fics of pride 2023 with this poly fic!

Summary: After being captured during a job, you attempt to down play the effects it had on you.

Warnings: this was written a while ago, physiological torture, torture, haphephobia, temperature changes, claustrophobia, panic attacks, questionable sanity at certain points, mild violence, swearing, hallucinations, asylums, straight jacket, suicidal thoughts, ptsd, trauma, mild blood, this is a heavy one guys, I think that's it? You have been warned!

The 3 P's:

[Pronouns used: you/your] [Pov: 2nd person] [Pairings: romantic! kanej x reader, (mentioned, platonic!) crows x reader]

It was cold, it was dark, and it was wet.

Yet it was so warm it felt like your feet were frying off but at the same time, it felt like they were numb. The room was dark only that, never changed, it was always dark. The light could never reach in here, not even a sun summoner would be able to summon anything in that cell. It was damp, but maybe that was because of the blood pooling around you as everything else was dry.

Laying on your back you look up, your eyes widen and you barely blink five times a minute. The heat in the room is unbearable to you, so you try to sift your body, to relive some of it. Then all the heat leaves your cell, room, home? You weren't sure anymore, but it was suddenly cold, so cold.

The room starts to spin and all you used to be able to see was darkness, but now you see different worlds and universes! The rational part of your brain knows it's not real, but the part that slowly submits to the mental pain and stress of everything starts to convince you otherwise. The only thing that keeps you grounded is

Them.

Then everything is falling and you don't know if you're screaming because you can't hear anything, and you can't flail your arms to wave around because you're stuck in some sort of jacket. A straight jacket you think is what Kaz called it, he said it was for the crazies.

But you weren't crazy! Yet why else would you be in one then? Maybe you were insane...

Oh, right the mission. You weren't crazy, you weren't crazy, you weren't crazy! You were just locked up because you fucked up on a job. Maybe you deserved to be in here then.

Then you were back to getting up and to hitting the walls. Perhaps to feel something, to have control, but you couldn't kill yourself on them no matter how hard you tried.

So you screamed, cried, and yelled. Eventually, you started babbling on about other things that made no sense entirely.

Or at least you thought you made a noise. You couldn't tell, because what really is reality?

You sit up from your bed preparing to kill someone.

The knife that is usually underneath your pillow is in your hand at all times now after that one job. Always ready to strike.

"Fuck." You mutter as your head falls into your hands as tears well up in your eyes. Again.

You thought after two weeks out of that asylum you would be over all the nightmares, but you weren't over anything. You couldn't have anyone touch you unless they made it very clear what they were doing, you couldn't sleep in complete darkness. Hell, you didn't even like going in a dark space anymore. Oh, there's more. The constant flashbacks, and the extreme claustrophobia, not being able to have your hands wounded together. The feeling that complete silence gives you. Always, always, having to remind yourself that you're not going crazy, it was just the lack of sleep, or the partially non-existent sleep.

All of that could be summed up into one word PTSD! But if you wanted to be even simpler the word would be trauma.

Nobody really knew how bad it affected you either, Nina did because you had to tell someone but other than that you just didn't tell anyone. You didn't want Kaz or Inej to take you off jobs so you downplayed what happened and told them it wasn't a real asylum really.

Probably you would never tell your boyfriend or girlfriend, they had their own problems to deal with.

The tears don't fall down your face, but they are pretty damn close as you stand up to take a walk... Somewhere.

Walking out of the safety of your room you don't know where you're going, all you know is that you have one goal in mind: Away.

You find yourself outside of Kaz's office door. The last place you wanted to be, but maybe the place you needed to be. Your hand grip's the doorknob as you close your eyes and try and come up with some sort of excuse so you could be close to your lovers.

You could hear their voices talking and scheming together about the next heists and jobs. It brought a smile to your face, and instead of opening the door your hand slips off the door handle and you slide down to the floor. The wall next to the door was cold, and incredibly wet.

"Subject number one." Your head snaps up to where you heard the voice from. You've haven't heard a real voice in what seemed like years, centuries even. But instead of seeing a real live person all you can see through the darkness is a blurry speaker and the one way glass.

"Stand up please."

You don't stand up, rather you do the exact opposite as you start rolling around the room muttering random things. Perhaps you really had gone insane, or maybe you were just defiant.

"You see now that subject number one is clinically insane. Tested by the royal ravkan grishas themselves!"

Ha! No one had tested you! They had just put you in here as a form of punishment for getting caught stealing... What was it again? Silly you, you must have forgotten!

So then how much time would it be until you would forget them?

"So now we're going to do the cold test. It's where we'll turn the temperature down drastically to see what a clinically insane person would do!"

And then suddenly everything was cold - so cold.

"No, no, no, no no..." You mutter as your knees come up to your chest as it starts heaving.

Fuck, a panic attack.

"Please stop, don't touch me!" You blubber, tears filling your eyes as you start to rock back and forward.

"Please make it stop! Make it stop!" You cry.

You hear some foot steps and you assumed the door to Kaz's office opened, but you couldn't really comprehend everything properly because you were trying to keep yourself from spiraling further.

"Y/n!" You hear Inej's voice call out to you but the other voices are just too strong, filling up your mind with vicious attacks, and daggers killing off the very little of your will left. You didn't even notice the blurry figures crouching in front of you.

Forget. Everything will be easier.

Maybe you are really a freak.

You fucked up, you deserve to be here.

You almost killed your lovers, what kind of sick monster would do that?

You. Are. Insane.

Insane, insane, insane!

"Breath L/n." Kaz places an ungloved hand on your shoulder.

"Don't touch me!" You push him backwards suddenly standing up and you start sprinting towards the steps.

"Y/n! Wait!" Inej takes hold of your wrist and her skin on your reminds you of touch too much. Too much pain.

Crack!

A crisp and cold crack was heard throughout the Slat as you snapped Inej's wrist. She screams in pain and Kaz catches up to you both, worried, and beyond terrified at what is playing out in front of him.

"I said don't touch me!" You sob, and once again your knees give out underneath you as you collapse with sobs clogging your throat on the floor.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry..." You whisper brokenly, the last bits of your mind coming back to you.

Inej and Kaz look down on you as Inej cradles her wrist in her hand and it finally gets to her.

"That was a real asylum wasn't it?"

And at the those words you sob harder as you nod because no words would be coming out of your mouth.

"Oh, saints Y/n." Kaz's voice comes over and calms you a bit, better than it did before anyways.

"We should have never have left you there."

With tremendous effort, Kaz crouched down beside you but he didn't come any closer. His hands are gloved now, so when he reaches out to brush a finger across your cheek you don't feel anything. Only the worry and love coming from Dirtyhands himself, he barely even touched you though. But maybe that was the point.

"Is this okay?" He questions, his hand dropping.

All you do is nod, you aren't in the right state of mind to be forming coherent words, the lack of sleep certainly wasn't helping.

Inej, probably from her standpoint, could see this and made eye contact with Brekker to see what they were going to do.

"You'll get them to the bed in your office. Unless you want me too, and that's fine I'll just have to wearing some gloves and some more clothes." Inej says - well you think she says that because every things starting to get really woozy, and the begins world spinning.

"Inej, Kaz." You whisper the words finally forming in your mouth bringing their attention to you right before you slip into unconsciousness.

"Help!" You scream. "Help!"

"No one can help you here." The sharp, villain-like, voice comes through the speakers into your cell.

You ignore what the person said and you try and bang on the walls with your body, because you had a fucking straight jacket on.

"Help me! Please! Kaz! Inej! Help!"

The person just laughs through the speakers and it vibrates throughout the room making you stop in your tracks. Inej and Kaz had to be coming... Right?

"Even if they could come for you Y/n L/n, why would they? Who would come for someone who's insane?"

"I'm not crazy!" You holler at the one way glass, knowing there was a big chance that the person was looking at you through there.

"Maybe not yet, but-" The person pauses and their voice sends a chill up your spine.

Instantaneously, the walls on the room start moving towards you. No, no, no, no... They keep on moving and you can hear the person giggle wickedly as they keep on coming towards you. The walls are going to squish you, you were going to die here.

"No!" You shout, you couldn't die here!

Abruptly, the walls stop moving, but then the lights start to dim until it's pitch black. You feel something caging you in, it gets closer and it starts to squeeze on your body till it stops. Then, starts to move back. Wait... It must have been the walls from before.

"N-no." You manage choke out, as you start to weep.

"Please! Anyone, help!"

"You will be insane Y/n L/n. Just you wait."

Something brushes up against you and you realize that you're terrified that it could be the walls moving in on you and you would never know.

"INEJ! KAZ!" You shriek.

"Get me out! Please let me out! I'm not crazy I swear!"

"Kaz! Inej!"

"Y/n! Y/n!"

You sit up with a start, sweat dripping down your face as tears well in your eyes.

Glancing beside you, you realize it's Inej who woke you up. Her face looked mildly terrified and she looked like she was in pain.

"I didn't want to touch you, so all I could do was yell." She said brokenly shoving her face into her hands.

"I'm sorry, we left you there."

You sigh but you smile slightly at your girl.

"It's not your nor Kaz's fault, I also told basically everyone it wasn't real. Even if I was lying to you, the biggest person I was lying to was myself." You close your eyes trying to will the memories away.

As you open them you start to see Kaz starting to limp inside the room.

"We're-" He starts

"Don't finish that sentence Kaz, I know you both are." You cut him off with a small glare, today was not the day you wanted to see the bastard of the barrel apologize.

He sighs and he sits on the other end of the bed. Inej comes and sits by Kaz who she links her hands with. Then you sit up and you ghost your hand over theirs.

It wasn't okay, but it could be. One day, it wouldn't be always darkness.

Words 2050

-thedelusionreaderbitch

Grishaverse taglist: @kaqua @rika90 @thefandomplace @musical-theatre-obsessed-dumbass @gallysonegoodlung @navs-bhat @sumsebien @dontjudgeabookbythecover @brekker-zenik @alohastitch0626 @brekkers-desigirl @emmsamultifan06