#Kay x nd5

[by-glass-and-waves]

Guess who wrote 1k words for another unfinished Kay/ND-5 oneshot half asleep this morning (like 3am and 7am after catching some z's)

Yeah. This bitch. Have a piece.

Context: Kay has to sleep in the cockpit because her night terrors keep waking up the others and ND-5 wants to make sure she don't have any more

Warning: handholding, writing that needs more word legos and thought vomit

ND-5 turned as soon as his audio receptors picked up a noise.

"Nix," she murmured, grasping at her sheets. "Nix, where…" The merqaal woke up and rubbed her cheek. "Don't…"

A scan of her vitals showed her distress was alleviated slightly by the merqaal's actions. But it wasn't enough. If her nightmare progressed, then he would be forced to wake her up. And then that would interrupt her rest, perpetuating her plight.

He looked down at his hands.

Here, in the seclusion of the cockpit, he did not have the other crew members to comfort her. But it meant he did not have to be embarrassed about his own attempts to.

He hesitated, before he reached over and rested his hand on her shoulder. He made sure he did not apply too much pressure, though it was strange to exert such a lack of force for once.

"Kay," he said, "he's here. Nix is here." He paused, his processes deciding whether he should speak further.

"…I'm here," he said.

Kay stilled.

Then she grabbed his hand and held it close like a vise. Whenever he tried to pull away, she only gripped it more tightly. He was trapped in an awkward position, leaning forward on his seat as he watched her vitals settle into acceptable limits.

That was an unexpected response. ND looked at Nix, who appeared to shrug before settling next to her and falling asleep. It seemed that she was not going to release him any time soon.

[tinderbox210]

Thinking about Kay coming for ND-5's rescue again for absolutely no reason but because I love everyone's reactions.

I love how Kay makes her priorities clear and that she came to save ND-5 while saving Asara is barely an afterthought (outch!).

ND isn't really able to show emotions on his face, but, boy, you can tell he's shooked and his processors are running hard in this moment, trying to process the fact that Kay came after him, risking it all for him!

And I just love the way Jaylen and Asara look at ND with their matching expressions saying "Wait, him??? You're here for HIM?!?" (I think that both of them are a bit smitten with Kay in the game, well everyone is smitten with her for good reasons).

This is like one of the top and iconic tropes with the hero coming to rescue of their beloved last minute and I have so many feels about this.

And don't even get me started on how Kay wears the Stormtrooper gear in this scene, making her look like a knight in shining armor, and ND, restrained by the restraining bolt, is basically the cursed/chained up damsel in distress in the clutches of the evil syndicate king.

The game really went hard with these classic romantic tales/tropes for them.

[karmadash-is-shippingtrash]

Sharing some of my fav screenshot collection of Kay and ND-5 : highlight set under the read more to save your dash space. Here’s to my fellow KD5 shippers. Yes I love the Crimson Dawn outfit set what about it.

[by-glass-and-waves]

So Star Wars Outlaws got its claws in me still and I want to throw this out

What if Kay and ND-5 were analogues to Orpheus and Eurydice?

Spoilers towards the end of the game, and a lot of word vomit

edit: I wrote a part two if you want even more word vomit

What most people might remember about the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice:

Orpheus and Eurydice were married, and Orpheus played the loveliest of music that everyone enjoyed. Then Eurydice died and his music became as sorrowful as he was.

One day he dared descend to the depths of the Underworld to speak with Hades and Persephone. He swayed their hearts with his songs, and they agreed to let him leave with Eurydice with one stipulation: he couldn't turn around until they returned to the world of the living.

Finding it easy enough, Orpheus made his way back to the surface with Eurydice following him. But she was a shade while she remained in the Underworld, and so her footsteps did not make a sound. Filled with doubt that she was following him, he turned back to look at her a few steps from the surface, only to see her dragged back into its depths.

Having that in mind, I can see Kay as Orpheus and ND-5 as Eurydice. Except, you know, Kay does it right.

So what's going on when ND-5's power core gives out?

Kay goes into the depths beneath Myrra (the literal underworld) with ND-5 and Gedeek. And how do they get there? A hidden entrance revealed by Temmin, with flooded corridors leading to the factory. Similar to Charon guiding the dead across the River Styx.

They're surrounded by the remains of countless droids in the factory—a graveyard, as they put it. Wandering the underworld indeed.

At the very bottom, they get captured by the rebels. They're impressed by Kay's achievements and offer her a bargain: save the captive rebels, and they'll provide the piece that will save ND-5.

By this point, ND is but a shade of himself, regressing back to his former personality and reliving his memories of the Clone Wars. His time in stasis might be considered a kind of death, causing Kay a lot of grief.

So, Kay saves the rebels, and she gets the power core for ND. Here we get a bit of a twist.

The rebels tempt Kay to "turn around" and join them instead of continuing forward to complete the heist. Turning back meant getting separated from ND-5, which meant there was a chance that she'd never see him again.

So because she is as reasonable as we are, dear reader, Kay turns them down and returns to the surface without looking back or having any second thoughts. Thus where Orpheus and Eurydice weren't successful, Kay and ND-5 were.

If you REALLY want to stretch things, if Kay decided to turn around and stay with the rebels, she instead would be the one trapped in the underworld both literally (the rebel base) and metaphorically (remaining bound by Sliro's death mark, the cartels and their ilk), while ND-5 escapes.

Hmm...idea where ND-5 decides to break into the rebel base for her...

[by-glass-and-waves]

I've been writing bits and pieces of my ND-5/Kay Vess fics. It seems like the coat fic is the most complete so far. Maybe it needs more internal word vomit? I've made a laundry list of fic ideas too, terrible

But here's a different fic snip snip, post game:

"So, ND-5, have you decided what you wanted now that you're free?"

What he wanted did not matter for a very long time. But now, beyond the confines of the restraining bolt…

"I want…"

Kay was far too close. He could count every eyelash without magnifying his visual input.

"I want…"

He wanted something impossible. He wanted...

"...A purpose," he said, recycling a past response. "And I want my purpose to be part of a team. With you."

Kay's face dropped. "You don't want…something more?"

The way she asked, he wasn't sure if she meant something more outside the Trailblazer's walls, or something more with her.

"I want you to be happy, Kay," he said, his voice barely audible.

[by-glass-and-waves]

That feel when you thought you were done with your fanfic and then ran into an in game interaction that colors the fanfic and oops gotta tweak things now what is happening in here it's 3k+ words do these make sense??? I need to go to bed

In the meantime, here's a newly written snippet of the "Kay is freezing in Kijimi so ND-5 uses his coat as a blanket but also gift giving" fic, working title "Euthermia"

Kay seemed to pause there. "Ah. So it's just a reward for my work," she said, slowly putting down the coat.

He found it a strange reaction, but on further analysis he realized why. "You expect it to be an exchange," he stated.

"'I help you if you help me.' It's always been like that," she said, looking at the console. "That, or… Well, let's just say that people think more about my things than they think about me."

Nine point seven three seconds passed as he filed her response for later analysis. It was a strangely familiar explanation, though ND-5 never put words to it. "I see."

"Well, it's just how the world works," she continued. "It's naive to believe that anyone's looking out for you for no reason."

The restraining bolt reminded him that he was satisfied with his position as Jaylen's enforcer, and that he could not ask for a better gift than a continued purpose.

[by-glass-and-waves]

So when I was making the whole Kay and ND-5/Orpheus and Eurydice comparison post, things got...convoluted. To the point where I had to cut my analysis into pieces. So here's another slice. Spoilers for the end of the Star Wars Outlaws and a ton of word vomit, of course.

Whereas the descent into the droid factory was similar to the Orpheus and Eurydice myth, the infiltration into the Revelator is more of an inversion of it. Well, I like to think so, anyway.

Tl;dr: I flip the myth turnways, I look at how ND-5, the Eurydice figure, has at least some agency despite the restraining bolt at the end of the game, and theorize how Jaylen uses that agency to make ND comply with his orders anyway

Kay descends into the Revelator, an underworld in a metaphorical sense (imprisonment there meant certain death). Gedeek doesn't fill the role of Charon. Instead, he becomes the "coin" that allows her to enter the underworld. Funnily enough, it's Sliro who "ferries" Kay to her destination.

After watching what transpires, Kay sees ND-5 standing between Jaylen, the new Director of the ISB and leader of the Zerek Besh, and Asara, the captive "ruler" of the underground rebel base.

When Kay says she's there for ND, Jaylen lets her have him without asking for anything in return—by commanding him to hunt her down. His shade is what he was before he met Kay, a prisoner to the restraining bolt and nothing but another battle droid. And it's this shade that makes constant reminders that he's close behind her, as opposed to Orpheus not hearing Eurydice's footsteps behind him.

ND-5 himself isn't willing to leave with her either. Maybe it's the restraining bolt obligating him to stay, maybe he truly believes that he shouldn't be saved. His lines contradict each other, reminding her that he's nothing but a battle droid and begging her to leave one moment then mocking and threatening her the next.

One line even dehumanizes her to nothing but a target to eliminate: "Enemy in sight."

In his worldview, Kay looking back, coming back for him only meant that the underworld would doom them both. Her, by taking her life. Him, by making him irredeemable and reinforcing his belief that he's nothing but a droid ("your death will be on my conscience").

So, ND said that what he wanted hasn't mattered for a long time. But now, he wants nothing more than for Kay to escape. And the only way she would do so is to chase her out himself.

Jaylen hasn't been oblivious to how the dynamic between Kay and ND-5 evolved over the course of the game. It was especially interesting to see how ND resisted his initial command to shoot Kay on the Trailblazer and still tried to speak as himself over the restraining bolt. It was fascinating to watch. Useful to know.

The perfect lesson in loyalty.

Here is where I suggest that Jaylen told ND-5 that while the objective was to eliminate Kay, he would allow Kay to live on one condition: If saving her life meant making her fear and hate him—for his closest friend to find him so repulsive that she gives up, leaves him behind with his master, and never looks back—was it a price he was willing to pay?

Spurred to kill Kay by Jaylen's command yet determined to set her free by his own choice, knowing either outcome will result in his grief, ND-5 moves without hesitation. "I won't get tired! I will never give up! Run, Kay, and never come back!"

[by-glass-and-waves]

Idk last night I ended up writing like 1k words related to ND-5 and Kay Vess instead of doing my work homework and it ain't even done but I'm carving the sentences I do have into points lmao

If I do end up posting something, prob gonna be a oneshot collection? I dunno. Ain't going over the top like with Courtship's literary themes, Byronesque Narinder, worldbuilding, and deliberate word lego placement. It's refreshing to have the words come out more easily again though the more they fester the more I'm gonna start adding shit and go over the top

Working titles: The Equation/Variable Named Kay Vess (from ND-5; equation flows better, variable more appropriate?)/The Case Study of ND-5 (from Kay)

Have a peep:

He was passing the time going through their inventory—not trying to find any other layers for Kay, mind—when he heard shuffling from her bunk. A quick scan revealed she was not in emergent distress but instead, cold. Still. Even in the Trailblazer, the ship's heater working in satisfactory condition nearby, was she shivering and curling up under her blanket.

His vision trailed to the discarded coat on the couch. It would be adequate for warmth, but was too short to cover her entire body.

Beyond logic, one part of him proposed his own coat. Kay Vess wouldn't sleep well if she kept shivering like this, it stated. If she didn't sleep well, her judgment would become impaired. Impaired judgment led to mistakes. Mistakes led to death. Death meant a displeased Jaylen and a search for a new slicer which would be most inconvenient.

It was logically sound, he decided, shrugging off his coat and exposing his arms to the air. There was little doubt of his droid origins, now that there was nothing to conceal it.

Exposure. Concealment. Such organic concepts. They brought forth the recollection of an old story, where mortals covered themselves out of shame after falling to the temptation of knowledge. A program began running a comparison between himself and the figures, before—

ND-5 halted and ended the process. The information was irrelevant to the matter at hand. His hands, ever precise, draped the coat over Kay Vess.

[by-glass-and-waves]

uh oh I posted a Star Wars Outlaws fic (spoilers for end of the game)

Multiple error and warning messages filled his system logs. More and more resources diverted themselves from vital systems as his processes cascaded into an infinite loop, trying and failing to perform an action that would fulfill both Jaylen's commands and his own wishes. Here he was, consumed by flames yet frozen by inaction, unable to lure Kay closer, yet unable to drive her away.

[by-glass-and-waves]

I think I need to use a computer screen instead of my phone to read this cursed 3.4k word fic because I can't keep track of it

I removed one section of "Euthermia" and added onto/revised a few others??? What am I doing???? This is supposed to be finished a week ago???

I don't consider this quality on par with Courtshit or "Only Success or Failure" but fluff/slice of life/more positive subjects don't seem to be my strong suit. New vs old version of one scene below:

Revised version:

"You should purchase something warmer from the Ashiga Clan," ND-5 suggested one day. "The Queen was gracious enough to give you a discount." "These clothes are fine, ND. I can make it work." Kay Vess was not making it work. She was still shivering under her coat, and he could see how often she shoved her hands into her pockets. Whenever she returned, he observed the reduced blood flow through her extremities, suggesting that her gloves and boots also offered little insulation. Her lack of head covering added to her discomfort. The droid tapped his fingers on the armrest of his chair. Kay's purchases, though an improvement, weren't sufficient against the cold. If she spent an extended amount of time in the cold — a possibility, considering their plan to break Ank out of the factory — then he might need to purchase medical equipment to return her temperature to normal levels. And he was not keen on going to such lengths when the solution was much simpler. With that rationale, ND-5 pulled up a list of Ashiga Clan-affiliated tailors. If she was on friendlier terms with the Ashiga, then he would take advantage of them. She clearly wasn't going to.

Old version (let's point and laugh at how short it is):

Despite his doubts, Kay Vess was granted an audience with the Queen as well as her good graces. ND-5 tapped his fingers on his chair, thinking. Kay's purchases still weren't sufficient against the cold, especially at night. If she was on friendlier terms with the Ashiga, then perhaps he could take advantage of it. ND-5 pulled up a list of Ashiga Clan-affiliated tailors.

Notes: tl;dr it's just ND-5 totally justifying to himself why he's buying something for Kay.

More detailed notes: I felt the old version just wasn't... Enough? In the revision, you get to see ND-5 convince himself (in detail) that it's a better idea to do something for her sooner than later because the alternative would be such an inconvenience to him and the mission. I want to think that between the lines, he's looking for an excuse because he doesn't want to appear too soft on her. Yes, they're still at the beginning of their partnership, but no one likes seeing someone else suffering in shitty weather. At least I hope so?

Or I'm just looking for excuses. My biggest concern with this fic is that this could be OOC for ND-5 because this is when they're first working together. I know he starts sounding less irritated with Kay after the first recruitment mission, but would this still be too early? I don't know. I'm thinking too much about this. Why can't I just accept this is fluff and it doesn't matter that much

[by-glass-and-waves]

Guess who's playing with the idea of alternate endings/routes of Outlaws this time :o maybe I'll share my other list of ideas at some point

Spoilers ahead and some slivers of writing uwu

I already have the "Kay is kill" fic ("Only Success or Failure") which may or may not be continued or split into Kay did die/Kay didn't die routes. However I have other ideas :o

This one I've actually ruminated on and wrote out a tad, working title "The Loose End": After Kay gets stunned, she wakes up to ND-5 dropping her off on Akiva and telling her to forget him etc, then the aftermath (possibly with Jaylen letting ND-5 visit/keep an eye on her so he stops moping and performing poorly during jobs). Nix eventually catches him while he attempts to keep his distance. This fic might have those Orpheus and Eurydice vibes idk, but here's most of what I wrote out:

"You always liked Akiva the most," he said, keeping his eyes forward.

"ND, you don't have to do this. We can get out, both of us."

"I can't. The restraining bolt is absolute. I can't fight it."

---

"I want you to forget me, Kay. Forget me, and don't come back.//Leave me, and don't look back." With that, he stepped away and left her.

---

She laid in bed, staring at the ceiling. Akiva was indeed her favorite of the planets she visited, but she wanted to see more.

More with Nix. More with her old crew.

More with ND-5.

Her attempts to find him were fruitless; he was ever elusive though the Zerek Besh made their presence known everywhere.

The others I just thought up cause why not

Kay agrees to partner up with Jaylen so that she and ND-5 can continue to work together, and she tries to figure out a way to Freedom Spike him like we're playing 8th grade wallball

ND-5 doesn't make it through the factory mission OR ND-5's memory banks get wiped during the power core switch OR ND-5 is still malfunctioning despite the power core switch

Kay is captured during the heist, ND-5 ain't having it OR Jaylen is contemplating whether or not to abandon her, how the rest of the crew reacts

Kay makes it, Nix doesn't/Nix makes it, Kay doesn't in Tattooine

Ideas are difficult, writing them out to completion is even harder >:(

[by-glass-and-waves]

Oh 'Euthermia', you pain me so

I'm going through it again to smooth out awkward phrasing and add more...symbolism? Repetition? References to in-game dialogue? Hopefully it makes sense?

Previous version:

When he reviewed their conversation, ND-5 realized that he should not have suggested making Kijimi their first destination.

It was a bad idea to suggest a planet with a climate Kay had no experience with. Especially one that was the opposite of Cantonica's own. At the same time, she should have considered the environment before making the jump.

A search through the ship only revealed a long sleeve for Kay to wear before she exited the *Trailblazer*. "You're going to freeze out there, you know," he told her as she straightened her shoulders and walked towards the door.

New version:

In retrospect, ND-5 shouldn't have suggested visiting the frozen rock named Kijimi first. But it wasn't his fault that she didn't consider the weather. It wasn't his fault that she blindly followed his recommendations.

After all, it was *her* choice.

"You're going to freeze out there, you know," he told her as she straightened her shoulders and walked towards the door. All she had was her pants, her jacket, and a long sleeve they found after searching the ship.

[by-glass-and-waves]

You know you got a problem when you got a laundry list of ideas to roll with

And analyses

And analyses for other things

I wrote a shitton for yet another thread, have fun :o

Spoilers for the Star Wars Outlaws endgame:

"ND, this isn't you. I know you can fight this," she begged, gripping the blaster and struggling to turn it away. His servos locked, preventing his arm from moving.

"Resisting is pointless, Kay," he replied. "You should have left me. Why did you come back?"

"Because you deserve to be free," she answered, squeezing his fingers in a vain attempt to pry them off his blaster.

He didn't know what regret was like, but it must be what he felt at that moment.

Warning: Abnormal observation detected. Halting process...

The restraining bolt reminded him of his raison d'être, and his grip on her wrist slackened. That glimpse of hope would encourage her, and he was more than happy to ruin it for them both.

[tinderbox210]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Outlaws (Video Game) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: ND-5 the Commando Droid/Kay Vess Characters: Kay Vess, ND-5 the Commando Droid (Star Wars), Nix the Merqaal (Star Wars), Tibbs Ospe, Ralakili Additional Tags: One Shot, Post-Game(s), Droids (Star Wars), Droid Whump (Star Wars), robot fight, Unresolved Tension, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst Summary:

“He is a battle droid from the Clone Wars, isn’t he? Rare thing to see these days,” Tibbs mused, his expression hardening as he shifted his gaze back towards Kay. Unfazed by her previous protesting and hostile demeanor, he took another deep inhale of his disgusting cigar, the pungent smell making Kay nauseous. “He was built to fight so that’s what he’ll do. I want to see what the old clanker’s still capable of.” Kay isn't pleased when ND-5 has to participate in an illegal underground droid fight.

[tinderbox210]

Them: Kay and ND-5 are only platonic

Then explain this:

The lack of personal space, the framing making them look standing so close, almost looks like they're dancing (or about to kiss...), and the dazed look on Kay's face...

[tinderbox210]

ND-5: Are you ready to commit?

Kay: Like, a crime or a relationship?