#KFP Employee

[mysterycubes]

[24]

Color palettes! Which one do you like?

[blubberymuses]

How many employees have met their fate working under Kiara?

"Not enough!!~"

KFP has a 100% mortality rate, but no snitches please <3~

[lexiiii-vt]

I hate to self-promote BUT these VTuber-inspired button-down shirts are in their last week of pre-order and we just need a few more sales to put them into production, so if you're an Irystocrat, KFP Employee, Honeybunny, Dragoon, or just like the Aesthetic, please consider checking them out!

Also, if you don't vibe with any of those, we've got an original, cherry blossoms-inspired design as well~~

Anyway you can find them all here if you're at all interested ~~

Thanks for reading, now back to your regularly scheduled shitposting

[themxtleycrew]

Kiara is going to hand Subaru a present, wrapped in fiery red and yellow wrapping paper. It seems like clothing given how soft the contents feels.

"Here you go! Thank you for being an amazing senpai! Merry Christmas!"

It's a KFP employee uniform! But not quite- It's seemingly been modified to look kind of like their company idol outfit. Perfectly tailored to the Shuba's size, too.

@cutetubers

"K-Kiara-chan!" Subaru blushed when she opened the gift, seeing the pretty idol outfit adorned with KFP colors and just her size. "Oh thank you!"

She quickly darts back, coming back with a box wrapped in white yellow red and blue paper (and with a little shuba duck in the bottom corner). "Here, this is for you Kiara-san."

It's a uniform for the Oozora police, tailored to Kiara's size and with its own hat and whistle. "Merry Christmas!"

[transbian-vergil]

i have concepts for how each girlies play style will be now bc i spent all day doing this after my test

MYTH

Gura:

Prevent enemy and ally deaths

The first time a unit takes damage without dying, units with Feeding Frenzy strike that unit

When a unit gets a kill with Feeding Frenzy, increase their attack power

Feeding Frenzy triggers on ally Feeder cards

Levels up after a certain number of feeding frenzy

Level up ability allows Feeding Frenzy to extend to other units if there are Feeding Frenzy units that have not struck after the initial unit has died.

Ina:

Levels up when she breaks the seal on the book

Level up ability wins the game

Must play 5 unique artifact cards and have all 5 on the board in order to break the seal

Spells focused on drawing cards and doing mulligans

Ame:

Focused on negating enemy effects and causing enemy attacks to miss

Negates require banishing alternate timeline Amelia’s

Level up requires banishing a certain number of Amelia’s

Level up unbanishes the Amelia’s and puts them back in your deck

Ame can now negate once per turn as long as she has an alternate timeline Amelia in hand or on the field

Calli:

Plays from the graveyard. Focused on sending cards to the graveyard and then using them to summon deadbeats.

When a deadbeat is sent to the graveyard, it is banished instead

Levels up after having deadbeats of a certain strength

Level up lets Calli put units she kills into her own graveyard rather than it going to the enemy graveyard

Kiara:

Focused on milling as many KFP employees as possible

The more KFP employees milled, the stronger Kiara is at level up

Offensive and defensive cards that require sending units to the graveyard

Instead of being sent to the graveyard, will become a ash pile until she has enough stacks, once she has the minimum stacks, she will level up, unless she already has more than the minimum when she is first sent to the graveyard.

Attacks have the effect of dealing burn damage to the enemy duelist after level up

PROMISE

Sana:

Sana and Sanalites gain mass based on the number of banished units

Spells that banish units

Level up once reach certain mass

Level up makes Sana and Sanalites BEEG and they must be blocked by two units when attacking

Bae:

Gamble deck

Card effects that roll dice to decide what they do, either damage to self or damage to the enemy

Spells and traps that roll dice to decide if they work

Level up after rolling a certain number of dice

Level up ability lets you reroll dice

Kronii:

Locking enemy units in the Time Prison and preventing them from being able to block

Spells and effects that allows Kronii to attack first when an enemy is in attack phase

Can prevent units from dying with trap cards

Levels up after killing enemy units during their attack phase a certain number of times

Kronies can interrupt enemy attack phase while Kronii is on the field after level up

Fauna:

Summons saplings

saplings heal when damage is dealt with spells and traps

If saplings are full health when healed, they grow in attack and defense

Rooted on saplings prevents them from being banished

Levels up when she gets enough growth stacks on saplings

Level up allows her to turn enemy units into saplings by damaging them with spells or traps

Mumei:

Health drain and stun effects

Puts counters on enemy units when they are targeted by effects

Levels up when a certain number of counters are placed

Level up pops all the damage counters

Irys:

Can swap between a healing or a burn deck based on the cards she plays

Each Nephilim card has an Angel or Devil ability (healing or burn)

Levels up to AngelRys or DevilRys after reaching a threshold of Angel or Devil effects used

Level up makes all Nephilim cards angel or devil depending on what level up, and increases their effectiveness.

ADVENT

Nerissa:

Focused on having many different spells to debuff and weaken enemy

Summon jailbirds when the first time a spell is cast per turn

Level up after summoning a certain number of jailbirds

Level up allows Nerissa to summon a jailbird for each spell cast, and if she cannot summon any more, provides an attack increase to jailbirds on the field

Shiori:

Units that gain buffs when unique spells are cast

Traps that draw cards when unique spells are cast

Levels up after casting a certain number of unique spells

After level up, spell cards are cast twice on the same target

Bijou:

Defense focused build, Bijou and Pebbles have Rock Hard that lets them take reduced damage from incoming attacks. 

Units with Rock Hard use their health to attack

Spells and traps focused on raising health and stopping attacks. Pebble throw.

Levels up when pebbles reach a certain minimum health

Level up combines all pebbles in play into the Moai statue, an unblockable unit with all the pebbles combined health

Fuwamoco: 

No level up, instead, swap between Fuwawa and Mococo via “Passing the Controller” effect

Fuwawa boosts the effectiveness of Fluffy cards

Mococo boosts the effectiveness of Fuzzy cards

Fluffy cards provide buffs, Fuzzy cards are for damage dealing

trying to make a holoEN card game because i love card games

[yarart4ever]

So I went to the mall today with my fam and me and my little sis went to the masks rack to look around, see if there are any anime masks and uh... We found this...

And now I want it-

Also spoilers there weren't any anime masks

[sails4ship]

Kira when her KFP miss behaves🤣🤣🤣

[hololive-en]

When there's a new KFP employee but it's Gura

[kaitokeiart]

some KFP memey(? / stream art I did over the course of becoming a KFP employee myself. all of them posted on Twitter.

[waterinthefirewhy]

(Transcript under the cut.)

Music: Oh my la-la-love rush, I feel it every everyday Music: Hold you tight, I'll never let go Music: Got a la-la-love buzz, you're in my heart you'll always stay Music: Right here won't fade away~ Music: Gimme la-la-love bugs, butterfli— [Record scratch] Kiara: fly-a-fly aw— [Drops you] oooh! Kiara: Oh my god, chicken down… Kiara: Uuuuhhhhh… I think he's dead. Kiara: Uhhhh… dammit. Kiara: Guys, this one can go into the fryer.

[blubberymuses]

What if Kiara and Calli swapped weights?

Well, Calli would certainly be doing a better job as a shinigami if she weren't essentially pinned down by her own heft, that's for sure.

As for Kiara... she'd certainly make a cute, cuddly mascot for KFP with how much she gobbles down her own cooking, and her chicken employee's might actually survive a day or two before being gobbled up due to her immobility limiting her reach~

[incorrect-hololive]

Calli, drunk again: She fuckin- she fuckin- she- they groundpounded my wife! The KFP employees groundpounded my wife! Then everybody f-wording left because the stream was gonna be shadowbanned. She was able to escape because I designed a Deadbeat that would be able to satisfy her in such a way that I would be able to finally groundpound her! But it didn't happen! Because then she decided to become a simp fucker and did the yabai with the whole Hololive EN and Hololive JP, which didn't even fuckin' matter because then she went into a new platform AND THEN SHE BECAME AME AND GROUNDPOUNDED THE WORLD.

Calli: THE WORLD WAS HER NEXT TARGET, BECAUSE HER BOTTOM LEFT WAS NOT PLEASED ENOUGH. SO SHE HAD TO HO HERSELF OUT AND BE THE BIGGEST KUSOTTOOORI THAT YOU'VE EVER SEEN. THE WORLD. IS GOING TO BE DESTROYED. RIGHT NOW. I'M ENDING THE STREAM.

Amelia: You shouldn't talk to your wife that way!

Calli: I don't give a FLYING FUCK, that bird can f-word off, I've divorced her ass three hours ago! I'm SO SICK, my body is doing THINGS - THAT THING! And you over there, SHUT UP. And you, take off my skirt! YOU WANNA SEE SOME - WEIRD SHIT?!

Gura: Calli, you need to calm down!

Calli: I'M-I'MMMMM TIRED OF BEIN' CALM ALL THE GODDAMN TIME! I WANNA LIVE MY LIFE! AND YOU! YOU, YOU, YOU. I'M SO SICK OF YOU.

Amelia: It looks like we won, everybody. We... broke her, finally.

[legalrehab]

We will get you home safe, KFP employee 🥺💜🐙

[gansitoemoji]

nousagis and kfp employees spotted at michaels

[welcometomy20s]

July 2, 2021

HoloServer Quarterly Report

Usada Constructions - Buy

To understand the current position of UsaKen, we must look to its history. At first, UsaKen was a joke, a riff on Majima Constructions, a potemkin company only existing to serve the whims of the founder and CEO. Pekora’s project was sophisticated and massive, her pranks simply legendary. But out of the blue, Moona enters. The mutual awkwardness worked in their favor, in fact this will be a prevailing theme, what might seem like a highly dysfunctional group, actually turns the whole thing into strength.

The Rabbit and Moon theme didn’t hurt them either, and the idea of Usada Construction as an actual entity enters the public consciousness, especially as a point of comparison to the fledgling Akukin Constructions… although it could be said that Akukin was the remnant of Hololive Resistance in some sense. This led to the initial expansion with the hiring of Coco and Kiara… but again this was more of a joke, a fleeting thought before UsaKen was about to come on its own.

It was the Akukin Relay that really set the ball rolling. Not only did we have the fortuitous event of Kanata accepting a position in UsaKen before finding out she did get a callback from Akukin, it spurred Pekora into focusing on Minecraft, especially her gaming plans were dirtied by corporate pressure. Pekora started small, with her misbehaving cannon and putting out her petty anger onto Noel, but soon Pekora unveiled her grand plan, Pekoland, and immediately set out to organize the company as a whole.

By now, the company was fairly-sized. It added Botan and eventually Towa into the mix, although Botan is still technically an affiliate and Towa first came with revenge, before using the company as an opportunity to learn how to be evil. Now the company measured seven strong, although they were quite disparate, having members from all three branches and across three generations. This was quickly noticed and a discord server was made in response, which led to another group project immediately after Pekoland, which was already a pretty big project. Combined with Coco’s final innovation, the Summer Festival became an even bigger project in the end.

And it would be odd to think this would end soon. There’s an actual structure to things now, people can communicate and build on ideas and the whole thing seems pretty democratic, even with its autocratic start. And Summer Festival brought UsaKen into the center of Hololive narrative. UsaKen is now the de facto face of HoloServer, and perhaps even Hololive itself. People look at the former loner as the master organizer. Things only look up from here, which is worrisome, but there’s enough in UsaKen that I’m less worried than usual. UsaKen will always come out stronger in the end.

Akukin Constructions - Buy

Meanwhile, Akukin completely collapsed. It felt like Aqua would return from her Apex marathon, but it turns out prior and prep for the solo concert meant a month break is what she needed, therefore Akukin was without a leader for one more month.

Lamy and Nene managed with their own projects, but the rest kind of fell apart. But the Summer Festival changed all that. Just as Akukin Relay signalled Pekora a restructuring was needed, Summer Festival meant Akukin had to show up. So, the skit continued. During the Akukin Relay arc, the mysterious yet feisty boss with two second-in-command who actually runs the thing scheming and fretting was a hit, with a hint of blackness in its blasted scaffoldings. Now, the blackness is very much apparent. Aqua cannot let the failing company go, and has become vicious. Considering Marine's past, this works to their favor. Lamy and Nene would be their own thing. Roboco and Mel would pop in now and again. As for Iofi and Aki… well, I’m not sure.

Choco, which I deemed the liaison for Shiranui, which has a contractual relationship with Akukin, now liaisons for Oozora Group as well. Choco might be the next important person just because of that connection factor. Akukin might be a contracting company now, although Aqua would not be happy about where they stand now.

Oozora Group - Hold

I know that Oozora Constructions, now Oozora Group, is not a publicly traded company anymore, but I still suggest holding onto that now-worthless piece of paper. The problem with Oozora Constructions was that its story went nowhere. Korone’s house was interesting, but it rarely had an ending, since it required Korone to cooperate and that’s usually an awkward thing at best. Her other projects were half-baked, and most importantly Subaru never really had that recognition. She wanted to build a company but others laughed at the prospect. So Rushia lost faith and moved to UsaKen. Oozora was tanking before it started to fly. But Matsuri took grace and joined Oozora, at which point it became a group. It’s not like Matsuri and Luna, the other employee, haven’t been together, and Subaru was called Matsuri by Sora, so why not?

In the last report, I said Matsuri is more like a government employee than a free agent, and indeed it seems Oozora Group now acts like a governmental organization, with building a police station being the first undertaking after restructuring. This is actually not bad. Public utilities are dearly needed in HoloServer anyways, and Subaru acting as a public servant removes the desperation in her actions that would make interactions much more friendly and interesting. By falling, Subaru might have turned a corner.

Tangent - Using an extended analogy, when the age of giant reptiles was wiped out by a meteorite, there were small survivors, which we now know as birds. So, it looks like Coco’s legacy would also be held by birds, holotoris to be exact. To explain why, let’s look at the current functional part of Coco. Coco is the bridge that connects East to the West, not just in terms of language, but also in culture and mores. In that way, holotoris nicely distributes this responsibility. Subaru might be the best JP member after Haachama in terms of English comprehension, and she is quite cognizant of recent foreign perspectives as well… so she could be a good future ambassador. For Reine, her Indonesian teaching stream reminds me of Coco’s early streams. And Kiara’s Holotalk has been the counterweight to Coco’s meme review since it started… Not to mention, these three are the most extroverted of their respective branches.

Shiranui-Elite Conglomerate - Hold

SEC is an organization of my own creation, but it’s a useful one, because it fits the current situation well. To sum up, Elite Construction was starting to fall apart as Minecraft activities waned, one of the replacements was GTA V, and the three major players were Miko, Flare and Suisei. Their collab together was probably the highlight of the last quarter and gave us a bright spot during a time of troubles.

As Minecraft activities increased, due to PekoLand and HoloID mall and Mel and Roboco popping in and out, the connection before was starting to bore out in Minecraft. Shiranui was originally a contracting company, working with Akukin for example. Therefore it had a family business type, indeed the only other employee was an honorary one given to Flare’s wife, Noel. But a series of interactions with Polka and Choco led to this master and apprentice relationship, which was a major hit.

Flare, pardon the pun, was always the black sheep of the Hololive Fantasy. While the other four have something to stand out and something to back the flash (Pekora draws with her laughter and manic behavior which is backed up by her earnest shyness, Rushia draws from her yandere metal screams which backed up by her sincerity and fragility, Noel draws with her upper assets and ASMR which is backed up by her erogaki silliness and her charming singing, and Marine draws from her horny nature which is backed up by her wit and almost motherly wiseness), Flare never really landed a character. Indeed, Flare is a straight man through and through. Not quite a tsukkomi like Subaru or Kanata at times, since there is not that retorting arrogance the two can exhibit, as people call, Flare was your comfy older sister...

But the Western audience and this Polka relationship changed that. In the West, the fatherly figure has more of a distinct and prominent role, and Flare can emulate this pretty well. A dad is grounded and serious, but can be silly and childish at times. But the silly and childishness does not undercut his serious nature… and that goes well with Flare (perhaps even more so than Calli, who is on a goofier side of things). Therefore Flare could finally breathe and express herself. And the introduction of Miko and Suisei brings the crew into full focus. They are reminiscent of early UsaKen, except while UsaKen was disparate, SEC most closely resembles… well, a D&D party. With your typical silly arguments and trials leading to growth and so on.

Adding Marine or even Nene might disturb this. Flare is fine with the size and I am too. It’s not like there are any real pickings left anyway. Shiranui-Elite conglomeration have a long journey ahead of them, but a brighter future that goes along with it too.

Haachama Construction - Sell (but buy Watasheep)

It was inevitable. Haachama/Haato thing was not going to be settled soon. Haato barely finished the Coexist arc, getting the Anno disease in the process. It was pretty clear that the Haato/Haachama thing became overblown and unfitting to what Hololive was now.

But this leaves us with Watame, and Watame is in an interesting position. Watame is between a lot of companies now. With Shiranui-Elite, she is part of the four heavenly lords, and as Watasheep, she does the delivery of Menya Botan and KFP, both part of UsaKen, who inadvertently cornered the fast-food business. And she is part of the 4th Gen, who has come much closer due to the departure of Coco.

Watame has always made the safe choice, she revolutionized the server with her excellent Janken machine, but it was Kanata who became the seller. Watame might choose to leave herself out, since her Minecraft streams are kind of meant to be relaxing. The reason she deliberately chose to level her field, instead of building the sign outwards like the rest of the signs. So, perhaps nothing comes of this…

OkaKoro Constructions & Shirakami Forestry - Buy

This wave of HoloServer was so large that even the rarer visitors felt a need to visit. Flare has reached out to Okayu, who has pointed out the reason for her absence was the loss of her basement and Korone has followed interest in the server as well.

Fubuki returned to finish her massive sakura tree, of course she acts alone, but she has been increasingly open to hiring people, but it’s not sure if this will become reality. Perhaps if Akukin finally dissolves, there would be enough workforce…

Kureiji Constructions - Buy

Ollie had a roller coaster of three months… Like a burnt fuse, Ollie has had several physical problems… that didn’t stop her from doing math streams (there are precedents Yashiro and Gwelu being good examples) and returning recently with late contributions to the Summer Festival. Reine has been helping on the side as well…

Free Agents - Sell

There is not much of this category anymore. Anya is the One who does not play Minecraft, in fact her demeanor is quite different from anyone else. Ayame not only has been gone from Minecraft, she has been gone, period. She really just returned to streaming after about three weeks? Risu is the only one remotely available, but she has the gene of OkaKoro, which does not induce work ethics in Minecraft, no matter how skilled she is. (Her roller coaster MLG is still one of my favorite clips)

Overall, 2021 Q2 was the best of times and the worst of times. There was a lot of big progress and a lot of setbacks as well. It’s a deeply uncomfortable but adventurous position, as it always has been for HoloServer and HoloPro as a whole. Next quarter will be further accomplishments and further challenges, and the company and the personalities and the audience will bear it through it all, as they always have.