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nottodayjjk · 3 years ago

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dirty little secret ~ knj

❆ summary: one fateful night in december, you come to acquire santa's naughty or nice list by accident. together with your neighbour and best friend namjoon you uncover the dirty secrets of your neighbours plunging everything into chaos. bringing mischief about is all fun games, until your own little secret appears on the naughty and nice list.

❆ pairing: namjoon x female reader (minor appearance of other idols)

❆ word count: 10,4k

❆ genre: humor, romance, fluff, smut

❆ fic warnings: oral sex (f. receiving), language

❆ rating: 18+

❆ notes from the author: this fic is part of a hoeliday well spent from the christmas in july collab hosted by @kookdiaries, @kithtaehyung and @xiaokoo and is loosely based on the hallmark channel-movie ‘naughty or nice’ (2012). i had a lot of fun writing this! big thank you again to @kookdiaries for creating this incredible banner and for @minigum for being the most wonderful beta reader <3

❆ tag list: @shameless-army @writtenwhalien @shrimpmsg @moonchild1

In the dark of the night, snow was falling softly and covered the street in peaceful quietness. Christmas decorations and flickering candles adorned the lit windows and lights were beautifully draped around snow-covered bushes. Sparkling reindeers pulled Santa’s carriage and inflated snowmen waved happily at cars driving by. Christmas time had just begun.

A few lamps illuminated the street with their yellow dimmed light as a dark, giant shadow slipped past. Quiet footsteps could be heard in the stillness of the cold winter night, wading through ankle-deep snow in heavy black boots. They were on their way to the sturdy apartment building on the left side of the desolate street, determined to fulfil their quest. They took another look around before they slipped through the glass door, the red fabric of their clothes gleamed under the flickering light of the broken lamp of the entrance lobby. Then, the night was quiet again.

You had been out with your best friend and next-door neighbour Namjoon whom you knew a few years by now. From the first day you had set foot in the small apartment building, he had been a helping hand, mainly through helping you carry a myriad of small boxes and things all the way up to the 6th floor where the both of you lived. The elevator had, of course, been out of order on that day. But he hadn’t complained at all! And because he had gone way out of his way even though he had only met you that same day, you had invited him to a take-away pizza and a bottle of cheap wine from the supermarket right around the corner. You had not expected your first night in your new home to be like this, to be so much fun. He had stayed until the morning, the two of you talking about anything and everything until the birds had chirped good morning outside. And the bond between the two of you had only grown from there on out.

You had visited a local Christmas market together, drinking a whole lot of eggnog and relishing in the joyful spirit of Christmas. You had never been someone to celebrate Christmas before you had met Namjoon. In your first year, he had basically dragged you to the market and filled you up with all kinds of different Christmassy drinks and snacks, bought you several gingerbread hearts, and even got you to ride one of the many attractions with him. The next day had been awful, the hot chocolate with rum had come out the same way that it had gone in. Still, it had been the most joyous Christmas time you had ever had.

Ever since then, he always did something new with you every Christmas. Buying a tree, seeing a Santa Claus show in the city centre, or writing letters with long wish lists to Santa. But it had never come down to actually spending Christmas eve and morning together, to your disappointment. He usually drove to his parents, a three-hour ride from where you lived, leaving you on your own to sulk in loneliness until he came back for New Year’s Eve.

Well, this year he had bugged you until you had agreed to go décor shopping for your apartment with him. It had made him sad to see your living space so empty during a cheery time like this. He got you all the basic things: fairy lights, cute little snowmen that had the friendliest smiles, a whole lot of candlesticks with red candles that smelled like gingerbread and cinnamon, hell, even glitter balls and bows for the small tree he also had gotten you.

After putting all the decorations up and “to celebrate your joyful shopping spree”, as Namjoon had called it, he had once again persuaded you to go to the Christmas market, letting no feeble excuses count. He had been in too good of a mood anyway for you to turn him down. You found it cute when he was all excited and giddy like this.

He had ordered eggnog after eggnog. His infectious enthusiasm had only gone up, not down a tad as you had hoped. But after the third eggnog, you hadn’t minded anymore anyway. Namjoon had entertained you all through the evening, making you laugh and enjoy yourself after a long week of studying and learning. Even though it had just snowed the other day, the eggnog had held you warm through and through, your cheeks feeling hot. Maybe it had also been a little bit because of Namjoon and how he had scooted closer and closer to you throughout the evening, ‘to keep each other warm’ as he had stated.

You had stayed until the booth had closed and the owner had hushed you to finally head home. Given both of your inebriated states, getting home had taken twice as long as it did when you’d left from home to go out.

As you had reached the door, waving a last goodbye to Namjoon who had stumbled clumsily into his own apartment, it had taken you a few minutes until you finally had gotten the key into the hole. You hadn’t even bothered to brush your teeth, only changing into comfy pyjamas – which had been quite the task – and slipping into bed. Dreamland hadn’t waited long to come, and you had fallen sound asleep.

So, to no one’s surprise, you didn’t hear when soft but heavy footsteps approached your apartment in the middle of the night. Didn’t spot the broad shadow that could be seen through the small gap under your door where the light fell in. Didn’t notice when a thick package wrapped with packing paper was pushed through the letter slot of your apartment door.

The package fell to the ground with a gentle thud. The towering figure hummed a merry tune before taking off again. You only turned around in your sleep, mumbling, “No more eggnog, Namjoon”, before it was quiet once more.

The rest of the night went uneventfully, and the package laid peacefully on your door mat until morning came.

A pounding headache. That was what had woken you up. The eggnog hadn’t been a good idea from the start, and you had told Namjoon several times. But even though he had listened to you, he had ignored your reasonable request. He hadn’t really given you a choice to begin with. And you hadn’t wanted to complain. At least he had paid and that was all that had been needed to convince you.

While Namjoon was already producing his own music, you were still a university student majoring in Art. You got by fine with the money your parents sent you and what you earned from your part-time job at the library, but you were still glad for every penny you could keep and save for after university. You dreamed of opening your own business and, heck, you needed a lot of money for that.

When Namjoon had heard of your ideas, he had been in immediately, supporting you in every way possible. Even if it meant paying for your drinks or your museum visits on the weekend. As long as he got to spend time with you, it was worth all his money.

You desperately grabbled for the nightstand. Luckily, you had prepared pain meds and water in advance, even a small piece of toast. Your nights out with Namjoon usually ended like this, so you are accustomed to it.

Sitting up a little, you popped the pills into your mouth first before chucking the water into your throat as if your life depended on it. Once you’d dealt with that, you reached towards the toast, munching on it until it was no more.

You felt better immediately as the medicine worked its way through your system and the toast soaked up the remaining alcohol in your stomach. Slowly the turns in your stomach lessened and until there was one thing overtaking your needs. It was time for coffee.

Slowly, you got up, swaying a little back onto the bed but overall, it was not as bad as you’d had expected. Sure, the eggnog had made your stomach a little weak, but you felt certain it could handle the coffee. Otherwise, you couldn’t make it through the day. Coffee was vital right now.

On the way out of your bedroom, you snatched your long silk gown, putting it on. You headed straight to the coffee machine, pushing the little blinking button so it started grinding the black beans. The soft smell of freshly ground coffee filled the air as you grabbed a big mug from the sink. You sighed and leaned one hip on the counter.

As you waited for the coffee you looked around and your gaze fell onto an exceptionally cheery snowman on your coffee table. You had never been keen on Christmas decorations. They were too bright, too colourful, and too cheesy.

Well, jokes on you. All the things the two of you had bought, the fairy lights, red candles, a few reindeers and snowmen, and some green fir branches, were now spread around your apartment, the small tree chilling next to your TV in the corner. It was hard to say ‘No’ to Namjoon’s puppy eyes. He usually got his way with you.

It had also been his idea to not only put the lights on the curtain rods but to wind them around them, too.

He had held you safely by your waist as you had stood on the ladder to reach up there. His long, slender hands had felt so warm through your clothes that your heart had stuttered for a second and you had gotten the job done rather quickly to get away from this weird feeling that had erupted in your chest. Because you couldn’t admit it to yourself. You couldn’t admit that Namjoon had become more than a best friend to you over the last few years.

But you had to confess; the lights were very very pretty. You even thought about keeping them up there after Christmas. They brought a soft glow around the room that made it feel unbelievably cosy and romantic.

As you absentmindedly grabbed for your finished cup of coffee you couldn’t help but remember the way Namjoon’s skin had glowed in these lights. How mesmerizing he had looked. How hard you had had to keep yourself from putting a hand up to one of his cheeks and caressing his soft skin.

You lost yourself in the memory for a second before you noticed something very peculiar from the corner of your eye. Something very square and brown. It was a package. On your doormat. ��What in god’s name,’ you thought to yourself as you eyed it in curious suspicion. The post usually never came that early. Especially not on a Saturday. And why had no one rang the bell? It was odd, to say the least.

You left your coffee on the counter, steam still rising in puffy clouds from the cup. Cautiously, you made your way over to the mysterious package that read your full address, but no sender. It was quite big, now that you had gotten closer, and it had you wondering how it had fit through the narrow letter slot. Maybe Namjoon was pulling a prank on you?

Before you picked up the package, you opened the door and checked the hallway, frantically looking left and right. But no one was there, not even Namjoon to cheekily grin at you.

Closing the door behind you, you took the brown package and laid it down on the counter next to your coffee. You eyed it once more while taking a long sip from the beverage. Should you open it? What if there was something… bad or deadly inside? You had heard of such packages before on the news. People sent them to get revenge on ex-partners or enemies. Well, you had no such things… and Namjoon seemed to be out of the picture as well.

After some more staring, curiosity finally got the best of you, and you carefully ripped open the brown packing paper. It revealed a heavy book that was edged in red velvety fabric that had golden ornaments engraved. Imprinted on it was the lettering “Naughty or Nice”. Wait- what?!

Snorting laughter erupted from your chest. This had to be a prank, right? ‘Namjoon’s good,’ you thought to yourself. ‘Keeps hiding until I actually look at the book. Not a very good prank, but alright…’

As you were about to open it, you could hear a key jingling in front of your door and some mumbled curses. ‘Speaking of the devil.’ Namjoon strode through the door in his pyjama and a long gown, his hair looking dishevelled and eyes still half-closed. He had your spare keys which gave him the possibility to let himself in whenever and you didn’t mind. At this point, it had become commonplace.

You watched with an amused grin as he immediately scuffed over to the coffee machine, grabbing another cup from the sink, and turning it on once more. He inhaled the smell just like you did before he turned around to face you.

“Morning, Y/N,” he hummed, and a lop-sided grin adorned his lips. Hell, how did this sleepy look fit him so well? “How is your stomach?”

You crossed your arms and leant back on the counter. “Better than I thought. You?”

“Same, same. I just really craved your coffee. This machine is a literal angel!” He turned back around to grab his coffee and take a big gulp before letting out a satisfied sigh.

“Very funny, by the way.” You pointed at the book behind you, still laying unopened on your counter. “You never have Christmas-pranked me before so that’s a first. But it isn’t one of your best ideas, if I can be honest with you.”

There was a moment of silence. You had expected him to laugh at you or make a clever remark about how he had gotten you to open it. But… nothing. He just blankly stared at you. “What?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about. Making this book look like Santa’s Naughty or Nice list? Very funny, Namjoon, very funny!” You chuckled a little at him pretending not to know what you were talking about.

He spied over your shoulder, reading the lettering. And shook his head. “Y/N. I… didn’t prank you. This–“ He pointed to the book. “–is nothing I came up with. Though I must say, I think it’s a pretty good idea!” He snickered a little and took another sip of his coffee.

“But–“ You turned around to the book. “–who sent it to me then? I don’t know who else would try and prank me…” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, taking another look at the packing paper. Still nothing but your address.

“Have you opened it yet?”

“No, I was just about to when you came through the door.” You put a hand on the binding. The velvet fabric felt soft under your fingertips and the golden lettering glittered in the glim of the fairy lights. It looked so… real.

Carefully, you opened it, coming face to face with a blank page. Maybe the others? You browsed to the next page. And the next. And the next. But they were all blank, not even a tiny little bit of ink to be seen. ‘Weird…’

Skimming through the rest of the book, you looked for anything peculiar. Nothing. “It’s empty,” you told Namjoon, while going back to the first page and leaving it open.

You heard shuffling on the floor and suddenly Namjoon leaned over your shoulder to look at the book. He stretched out his hand to skim through it as well. He was so close. You could feel the heat radiating off his body and his breath on your neck as he let out a confused huff.

When he stepped back from you after inspecting the book, you wished him back closer behind you. ‘Stop that,’ you scolded yourself in your head. ‘He is your best friend!’

“Well, it actually looks like someone pulled a prank on you,” Namjoon stated while making himself another cup of coffee. He usually runs on three. On a good day. That you knew his coffee consumption so well said a lot about how regularly he came over in the morning to use your coffee machine.

“Apparently…”

Loud bass suddenly disrupted the morning, booming through the wall to your left. ‘No, not again!’ It was your other neighbour… Jungkook. He kept it down on most days. But he always pulled this on a Saturday morning, and you were sure he was doing it on purpose just to annoy you. You had banged on the wall a few times before. On some days he even turned the music down after your knocking complaint. But today, it was on a whole other level. As if he knew you had been out late and had a mild hangover.

“Ugh, I’ll swear I’ll punch him some day,” you mumbled while pinching your eyebrows in frustration.

Namjoon knew you weren’t kidding. Jungkook had been getting on your nerves ever since he had moved in next door. Before him, there lived a nice and quiet lady who occasionally baked chocolate cookies for the two of you and had always put something nice in front of your door during Christmas time. Now, there was Jungkook. Student, party animal, and the type to listen to music so loud you couldn’t hear your own thoughts.

“I wouldn’t mind,” Namjoon said. “But I also don’t want to have to visit you in prison during Christmas time.” He chuckled lightly, running a hand through his hair before chucking down his coffee.

Suddenly, you heard a rustling noise of paper coming from the counter. The book! It was turning its pages on its own. “Holy-“

You stepped in front of the counter, Namjoon following closely, eyes as wide as the moon. “How is that possible?” he whispered while peering over your shoulder again.

A golden light bloomed from the Naughty or Nice book and the two of you just stared at in great awe as sparkles danced around the room. “I’m usually not one to believe in magic,” Namjoon muttered under his breath. “But this is a whole new thing…”

The turning stopped and the pages gently dropped down. Beautiful, curved letters emerged, writing your neighbour’s name. They shone golden in the light. “What is happening?” you hissed while intently watching the book. Namjoon just shrugged his shoulders, speechless.

Jeon Jungkook: always leaves his trash in front of Mrs. Kim’s apartment door

Underneath was a moving picture, showing Jungkook looking around frantically before putting his trash bag on Mrs. Kim’s doormat and a more detailed description of what was going on. You gasped out in disbelief. “Mrs. Kim is always so nice! How dare he!?”

Namjoon let out an angry huff. “You’ve got a good point but-“ His forehead crinkled in confusion and scepticism. “How does it do that?”

You shrugged, turning the page to see if it had a built-in display. But… there was nothing. It was just a normal page like any other. You turned back to the picture of Jungkook where he had gotten caught in the act. By whom? You didn’t know, could only guess… But no, this was not possible. Santa didn’t exist. But… an idea came to your head.

“Hmm, let’s put this to a test,” you said as the pounding bass continued to boom through the wall. You left the book open, the image of Jungkook engraved in your head, as you turned on your heels and made your way over to the door.

“You actually gonna go over there?” Namjoon trailed behind you, not sure if this was the right thing to do. You definitely had a reason to be angry at Jungkook. But what if this was all just a scam? Well, it felt far too real for that, but Namjoon wasn’t yet ready to call his beliefs into question. This was insane.

You nodded and opened the door. “He has been getting on my nerves for a few weeks now. It’s time to put this to a stop.” You gave him one last determined book before stepping out into the hallway.

Namjoon shook his head in amusement at your vendetta and stopped at your doorstep, leaning against the frame watching you. This was your fight. He wouldn’t get between the frontlines. He knew your anger all too well.

You rapped viciously on the door; quite sure Jungkook wouldn’t hear any of it. And of course, the door didn’t open and the music blared on. So, you resorted to a more effective method. You pressed the button of the bell and held it down. ‘I will have you answer your door even if it takes the whole freaking day.’

It took a few seconds, but you heard the music fading and someone swearing behind the door. It worked. A malicious smirk adorned your lips. You weren’t even nervous, more excited to try the spicy information you had acquired about him. The keys jingled in the keyhole and an annoyed face appeared in the ajar door. “What is it?”

You crossed your arms and put on your most intimidating look. The secret from the book gave you a hell of a confident boost. “Jungkook,” you started, “I’ve told you many many times to quiet it down.”

He rolled his eyes and huffed. “I know. I’m sorry but-“

You cut him off immediately. “No buts. You’re either gonna tone it down from now on or…”

“Or what? You’re trying to threaten me?” He laughed and threw his head back. “That’s new. Well, you’ve got nothing on me, Y/N.”

You squinted your eyes at him, and a smile grew on your face. “You sure?”

Jungkook leaned against the door frame while looking bored. The arrogant look on his face gave you the rest of the encouragement you needed. “Well,” you swirled one of your hair strands around your finger, “I know you’re putting your trash bags on Mrs. Kim’s doormat, so you don’t have to take it out yourself…”

It took a moment for Jungkook to realise what you just said. But when he finally did, his jaw almost dropped down to his knees. “How-“

“The poor woman. I think she deserves to know…” You turned around, feeling the power pulsating in your hands. It was electrifying! You slowly strode over to your apartment.

“Y/N!” Jungkook called out after you, desperation apparent in his voice. “I-“ He dropped his head in defeat, all pride and arrogance had left his body. “If you don’t tell her, I promise I’m gonna tone it down from now on,” he caved in.

“You better,” you just answered and walked away, leaving a speechless Jungkook by his door.

Namjoon snickered as you entered your apartment again, finding the whole situation very amusing. “Have you seen his face? He was so stunned!” Both of you burst out into a fit of laughter, needing a few seconds to calm yourselves down again.

You went back to the still open book. “So it tells the truth…” you stated while tracing the letters with your fingers when they suddenly started to disappear. “Oh! They’re vanishing!”

“Probably because you called him out on that,” Namjoon assumed, looking at the now empty page and then at you. “You know what that means… right?”

You turned it over in your head for a few seconds before you answered Namjoon’s gaze with a mischievous smile. “Let’s discover some secrets this Christmas!”

And so, the two of you went on to discover the hidden secrets and misdeeds of all of your neighbours. The book was never wrong. Not when it told you that Mrs. Kim had a secret fling with Mr. Sung from floor 5 and they were acting like giddy teenagers, that Mrs. Lee let her dog pee on Mrs. Park’s door mat once in a while because they couldn’t stand each other, that Soonyoung from second floor liked to bathe in pure milk occasionally, that Yeji from first floor stole Mr. Chew’s newspaper now and then because he was rude to basically everyone in the building, that Taehyung from fourth floor had sang Christmas carols in the middle of the night for Yeji because he had been out to drink, and many many more.

Some of them you used for your amusement, but most of them were kept between the both of you. You felt closer to Namjoon than ever before. Sharing and keeping secrets about your neighbours bound you together. And Christmas time was a blast, for the both of you! You went out once in a while to the Christmas market again but usually you kept your noses in the Naughty or Nice book, awaiting the next secret to appear. So, Christmas time went by in a happy blur.

After coming home from another one of your merry adventures, you began to realise that this might all be over soon. Actually, Christmas evening was tomorrow already and Namjoon would probably be off to his parents. You didn’t want to stop discovering all these secrets with Namjoon. You had spent a lot of time together; it had been so much fun. And you liked being around him, you knew that. You weren’t ready to admit it, but you had fallen in love with him even more by now. Even after all these years, his way of living and his wisdom still amazed you to no end.

Your thoughts were suddenly disrupted by Namjoon as the both of you reached your apartment door. “Y/N?”

“Yes,” you answered, shaking yourself out of your thoughts. Namjoon stood in front of you, nervously wrenching his hands. You had never seen him skittish before. Had something happened?

He took a deep breath before he began to speak. “I was… wondering if you wanted to spent Christmas together?” Namjoon nervously scratched his head. “I-“ he stumbled over his own words for a moment. “I don’t want you to be alone for Christmas. And my parents won’t be at home anyway. So, I was wondering- I mean-“ He rambled on and gestured wildly between the both of you.

To stop him, you gently put your hand on his arm. “Yes,” you answered simply and smiled at him happily, not able to contain your excitement at his request. Your heart was beating in your chest. Spending Christmas with Namjoon was a dream come true.

“I... would love to.” You rubbed your arm awkwardly while not being able to meet his eyes. You were sure he would be able to read your confused feelings for him right there.

He let out a small huff of relief. “Good, good… We can go grocery shopping together tomorrow if you want. So we can pick something to eat that we both like.”

“That sounds like a great idea. Meet in the morning as usual?” you asked, fidgeting with your jacket sleeve.

Namjoon nodded. “I will cook of course. You will be my guest! Also, your cooking skills might be a little insufficient for Christmas…” Mischievousness gleamed in his eyes and you just shook your head, laughing a little.

“I think my cooking skills are fine as they are. It’s not my fault you don’t like the food that I cook!” you exclaimed and hit his shoulder playfully. “Also, your food might taste better than mine. But you’re definitely more chaotic than I am!”

“Okay, okay,” he put his hands up in defeat. “You’ve got a point. I’m still cooking though.” He took off his beanie to run a hand through his hair. He stretched his arms out, motioning for you to give him a goodbye-hug.

Your skin tingled as you obliged. His hands rested on your back as he tugged you close. “Good night, Y/N,” he whispered into your ear, eliciting a shiver running down your back. Gosh, his voice and his soft lips were hovering right next to your ear. It created images in your head you shouldn’t be thinking about in the proximity of your best friend, but you couldn’t help yourself.

You swallowed a big lump in your throat. “Good night to you too,” you whispered back with a hoarse voice, heart still fluttering. He could hear the rapid beating for sure.

Both of you stayed in the hug longer than necessary, thinking about what would become of your adventures once Christmas was over. You were sure the book would disappear, that its owner would come to get it.

You sighed before stepping away from Namjoon, giving him a small smile before pulling out your keys. He went over to his door, a jingling noise reaching your ears. You looked over your shoulder before entering your apartment.

“Sweet dreams, Y/N,” Namjoon called over in a hushed voice before he disappeared behind his own door. Little did you and he know what effect these last few words would have on you…

Wanton sounds escaped your mouth as your hands grasped fiercely for your sheets. Waves of pleasure rolled through your body as you felt a desperate mouth latching onto your clit, tongue poking out to gratify your little bundle of nerves. Your eyes rolled back into your head. It felt… overwhelming.

You couldn’t hold in a lewd moan as the tongue worked magic on you. “Please–“ You couldn’t form a whole sentence without being interrupted by your own moans.

You felt a hand softly caressing your thigh. “Y/N,” a familiar voice reached your ear, making you perk up. Was this… real? You lifted yourself on your elbows to see if you were right with your guess.

Looking up from between your legs was a tousled Namjoon, cheeks red and lips glistening in the light of your fairy lights. He looked like an angel with his skin glowing golden and his hair illuminated.

It felt like a dream come true…

It wasn’t the morning light waking you up nor the loud traffic noise from the street in front of your apartment building. No. What woke you up was the growing wetness between your legs. Your heart beat loudly in your chest, a light film of sweat covered your forehead. Well, that had been… hot.

You had had dreams of Namjoon before. Funny ones, sad ones, even ones where the two of you had been dating. But with things like this, you had only been daydreaming about thus far. It had you all riled up, a little embarrassed, but first and foremost horny.

His head between your legs and his tongue on your clit had felt so real. Oh, what you’d give to actually get to feel that. But you were sure that it would remain something that stayed in your daydreams, when you had to release some friction behind your bedroom doors.

You sighed, pushing the thick blanket to the side. You had to take care of the mess between your legs and there was only one place that always helped: the shower. You had to get this dream out of your head before Namjoon would come over. Otherwise you wouldn’t be able to look into his eyes without thinking of the sinful scene that repeated itself again and again in your head.

‘Let’s get this over with,’ you pushed yourself to get out of bed and into the shower. As if you didn’t enjoy this…

As you sat down by the book again with a big cup of fresh coffee, you were actually wondering if you’d ever appear on the list. Or Namjoon. And which secret of yours it would be. So far, it hadn’t spilled any of yours. But it would be merely a matter of time until the pages would reveal what you had kept from one another. Even though there were barely any secrets between the two of you. Only this… this was kind of a major one.

Absent-mindedly, you browsed through the book again. What secret would reveal itself today? Maybe about this dude all up on floor 7 that was always wearing a beanie and sunglasses or that girl from over the street that was walking her dog up and down the street.

Someone was entering the apartment. Namjoon rounded the corner and came into your view. He was also still in his morning clothes, his feet hidden beneath two slippers. Your gazes met shortly, a quick nod exchanged and gentle smiles, before he made a turn.

“And?” He strolled over to the coffee machine, slippers scratching on the floor. “Anything new?” He nodded towards the book sprawled out in front of you.

“I haven’t really checked yet, give me a second.” You concentrated back on the book, pages sliding through your fingers as you looked for a new secret until you found it. You didn’t really pay any attention at first. But then you read your name in big, curved letters. A quiet gasp slipped past your lips.

Checking to see if Namjoon was still making coffee, you hoped he was not aware of your little slip up. He happily worked away, putting coffee beans into the machine, whistling ‘Jingle Bells Rock’ to the puckering sound of the milk frother.

Then, you turned your attention back to the book. When you read Has naughty dreams of their best friend in small letters, your heart sped up and your breathing got ragged. Underneath it was, like it had always been the case before, a more detailed description of what had happened. And a picture of you writhing and moaning beneath the sheets. No, why today?!

The words in front of you blurred as you tried to fathom the consequences if Namjoon came to read this. Your friendship would be over. He would never speak to you again. Hell, what would he think of you?!

You couldn’t let that happen. He was the only thing in your life that kept you sane. That could not all be thrown away. You quickly closed the book, thinking of something to distract Namjoon.

Unfortunately, the loud thump startled Namjoon. He turned around as he heard the sudden noise. He eyed you for a second and then noticed the closed book under your hands. He put down the coffee spoon he was holding. “Uhm… Are you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Your eyes are like… this wide.” He put a fair distance between his thumb and his pointer finger.

Quickly shaking your head, you scrambled for words. “It’s nothing. I-I thought I…” Yeah, what did you think? It was hard to lie when Namjoon looked at you like that. Your brain couldn’t come up with anything. Instead, you just gulped heavily.

Namjoon’s coffee was now forgotten, its owner too curious about what you had read and seen. He had, of course, noticed your nervous behaviour, growing suspicious of what you were trying to do. His slippers scraped along the floor again as he casually made his way over to you. With his gaze never leaving your face, he followed your every move.

Clambering for the book, you secured it in your arms before Namjoon could reach for it. He couldn’t find out. Not about the dream. Not about the feelings you held for him. But especially not about the dream. The sinful scenes replayed themselves in your head again and you felt your cheeks heating up once more. “There is nothing in there,” you exclaimed, trying to sound as convincing as possible. But there was a crack in your voice. And you could see it in his eyes. He knew.

Scrambling to sit up right on the couch, you shook your head ‘No’, keeping the book tight in your clutches. Over your dead body would it fall into his hands.

“If there is nothing to see, why are you keeping it from me?” He tried to reason with you, stretching out a hand towards the book that you kept clutched in front of your chest, your arms wrapped around it like it was the most precious treasure you had ever possessed.

Namjoon was not one to accept a ‘No’, you knew that. You could spot the determined look in his eyes already. There was nothing that would keep him from finding out. And that had you scared like hell.

You could only stare at him, not having an answer for his very true and logical question. He would always catch you with his well thought-out reasoning. It made you want to tear your hair out every time. Right now, though, you were paralysed by fear.

“Well, you leave me no choice,” he approached you slowly, trying to read you, trying to calculate which escape route you would take. Because whatever stood in that book, had you all jittery and he had to know why. Though he knew that you would never show him voluntarily.

Panic, your brain screamed. And your body scrambled up from the couch, trying to get away from Namjoon. You still clutched the book in front of your chest with both hands.

“No, no, no!” he lunged forward, reaching for you. “You’re not getting away!” He got your left foot before you could escape safely from the couch. Your body fell back onto the cushions, knocking the breath out of your lungs. But you didn’t let go of the book, no matter the pain it would cost.

In his haste to prevent your escape, he knocked down a few wooden reindeers and snowmen from the coffee table. Luckily, there was no glass there. You had told him right in the store that you would not be buying any glass decorations if he would be around. With his clumsiness, he would knock them down within mere seconds. Hell, he had almost dropped something right then and there in the shop. But you both had other things to worry about right now than your Christmas decorations.

“Namjoon,” you shout out anxiously. “Let go of me!” But his grip on you didn’t ease up.

“Not before you show me the freaking book, Y/N!” And he kept his word, his hands desperately trying to seize the book from your tight grip. But you wouldn’t give up so easily. You once more tried to get away from him, grasping for the armrest and pulling like your life depended on it. But he was just too strong, with one hand grabbling for the book and the other holding down your legs.

While fighting him off, you didn’t notice how he’d crawled up your body, getting in nearer reach of the book. And suddenly he was way too close to your face, hovering above you in such an intimate way he never had before.

There had been moments of course. Where he had caged you in a little at your door, when he had leaned in too close, when he had pulled you into his warm embrace… But that had been something different.

Now he laid on top of you, covering your body with his. His chest heaved against yours as he tried to catch his breath from fighting with you. His grey-dyed hair fell in streaks into his eyes and once more his skin glowed in the warm fuzzy light of the fairy lights that framed his head. For a second, the both of you just... stopped.

He looked deeply into your eyes; his pupils overshadowed with an emotion you couldn’t grasp. Your heart beat even faster and your brain felt like it would explode any minute. Your senses were heightened, and you could feel his skin burning on yours. It was… ravishing. Your body couldn’t get enough of it already.

Suddenly, he snapped the book out of your hand, forcing an evil laughter out of his mouth and the moment was gone. He had shamelessly used your messed up state to his advantage and now the book was in his hands.

He scrambled back up from his position on top of you, quickly getting away from you and taking the book with him so you wouldn’t come up with the idea of snatching it back from him. Well, you had resigned already anyway. There was no way you could stop the inevitable from happening now. You said your last goodbye to your friendship. He took one last look at your dishevelled and defeated state before he plopped down on the armchair.

Thump, thump, thump. You could hear your heartbeat in your ears like the drums of that one Christmas song that they always played on the radio, and your stomach took a heavy leap. No, you couldn’t watch this. It was just too much to handle. You grabbed for the plush Santa Namjoon had gotten you as a joke last year, and hid your face in the red fabric of his cloak. You peeked out anxiously, watching Namjoon.

Pages rustled as Namjoon slowly opened the book. His heart beat just as fast as yours as he searched for the right page. Not because he was anxious, but because of his excitement as to what he would get to read on that page. And then he finally found it.

He was not surprised that it was about you. He had actually predicted that. Why else would you react that way if this didn’t reveal something about you? But the content had him gasping out in astonishment.

To actually believe it, he had to read it more than once. It beat all of his wildest dreams. Not only had you caught feelings for him, but he had of course caught feelings for you as well. And quite some time ago too. He had wanted to confess more than once but he hadn’t had the guts. He was very afraid of losing you as well so this came as a very pleasant surprise to him.

Unable to help it, he read the passage once more and let his gaze on the image of you linger a little longer, feeling arousal crawl up his body. He had caught you staring at him here and there, when going for a swim in the summer or when he read a book, when you didn’t think he would notice. He had never given much thought to it though. He would have never guessed that you had thought about him, dreamed about him.

He needed a few to gather himself, to brace himself for what was to come. He couldn’t let this slide just like that now that he knew that you felt the same for him. Now that he knew what you were craving. And he wanted to give you exactly that. All night if you wanted to. He wanted to give you the pleasure that you deserved, see you writhing underneath his fingers, calling out his name so that everyone could hear what he did to you.

A mischievous grin passed over his face. He would take care of that wish of yours, as a Christmas gift. That he promised to himself and gathered all of his confidence for. His heartbeat was going through the roof but he didn’t want you to know, and tried to keep a calm face.

You peeked out once more as he closed the book. You tried to read his face, but there was nothing to work with. Had your friendship been ruined already? Would he just leave and never say a word to you ever again? You expected the worst, already feeling tears prick in your eyes.

Namjoon slowly got up from the armchair and now you were sure he would leave the apartment. You felt embarrassment, shame, and regret overwhelm you. But there was something in you that fought back. Your eyes grew big, you couldn’t just let him go like this. “Namjoon, I-“

But he cut you off mid-sentence. “Y/N, Y/N, Y/N.” He shook his head, putting the book down on the table and shoved it over towards you. Your gaze fell back to the image of you, a moaning mess in the bed. You couldn’t handle looking at it and instead gazed up at Namjoon and being met with an expression that you hadn’t expected at all.

He looked like a boy who had gotten the biggest present for Christmas, but there was also something a lot less innocent in his eyes. Holding your gaze, he came back over to the couch and crouched in front of you.

“You’ve been –“ He swallowed visibly, nervousness getting the best of him for a second, before he proceeded with confidence “–a very naughty girl, Y/N, haven’t you?” He cocked an eyebrow while putting both of his hands next to your legs that rested on the edge of the couch.

A shiver ran down your spine at his words. Never had you imagined that Namjoon would speak like this to you. You could not say much, your throat going dry, and just slowly nodded your head.

“Hmm, thought so,” he answered while letting his gaze wander over your form. “Well, what do we do about that? Naughty girls need to be punished, right?” His eyes drifted back to your face, satisfied he took notice of the effect he had on you. How your legs unconsciously rubbed together at his every movement.

With the heat rising from you, he felt drawn to you.

“But I think you’ve been pretty nice this year. I think we leave the punishment for another day and instead–“ He nodded towards the book, referring to the description of your dream under the picture. “– keep working on this.” He turned back towards you. “What do you think, Y/N?”

His words were music in your ears. This was more than you could wish for. You pinched yourself for a second, making sure it wasn’t another dream of yours, that you hadn’t just fallen asleep again in your bed. But it was as real as it could get. Arousal is already pooling in your panties, Namjoon’s deep voice resounding in your head.

By now, he was drawing small, soft circles on the skin of your thigh, patiently waiting for your answer. He wouldn’t do anything about it as long as you hadn’t given your consent. There was still a little voice inside of him that wasn’t sure if you really felt the same. He had no time to think too much about it though.

You cleared your throat, the effect he had on you clear as day. “I’d… love that.” You shyly answered, carefully putting a hand on Namjoon’s cheek. He leaned into your touch immediately, closing his eyes for a second to enjoy the feeling of the gentle action.

He pushed himself up a little, his face hovering in front of yours. You held your breath, excited for what was to come. He was even closer than before. You could feel puffs of his hot breath gently caressing your lips. His eyes kept yours caged, his pupils blown looking like black holes that swallowed you to take you to another dimension.

With his hand moving up to the side of your neck, it gingerly brushed against the skin and he left it at the nape of your neck. His face inched closer, barely any space left between your lips now. Your thumb grazed over his cheek, the skin underneath warm and tender. You could stay like this forever.

“May… may I kiss you?” Namjoon asked, gaze drifting between your shining eyes and your tempting lips. You took his breath away, making him weak in the knees. Why hadn’t he confessed to you sooner? He could have had it all already. You had both missed out on so much. But there was still so much time to make up for it all.

It took all of your willpower to not kiss him right then and there, but to answer his question first. You looked deep into his eyes, “Yes, I beg you to.”

And that was all that was needed for Namjoon to desperately press his lips against yours without hesitating for even a second. Both of you closed your eyes, relishing in the moment of the first kiss shared between the two of you. It was not at all how you had expected it to feel but so much more. Your heart took a leap at his soft lips that moved so lovingly against yours while his thumb stroked your neck, goosebumps rising on your skin.

Namjoon had to take a break to catch his breath, soft laughter escaping his lips. His hand remained at the back of your neck and so did yours on his cheek. But this break didn’t last long because both of you were already hungry for more. Your other hand went into his hair while your mouth landed back on his.

Tugging a little at the strands, he couldn’t help but let out a quiet moan, his lips opening to the kiss. His tongue darted out, tapping against your lower lip and begging for entrance. You let him stew a little until both of your tongues met in a heated battle.

Slowly, Namjoon could feel himself getting hard. Your sweet lips got the best of him and he couldn’t do anything against it when his mind imagined them wrapped around his cock. He could feel it twitch in his pyjama pants, begging for attention. But Namjoon wanted for you to cum first. The outlook of getting to taste you with his tongue between your folds was too promising.

In fact, he didn’t want to wait any longer. As much as he enjoyed making out with you, he wanted to dig into the real fun. He broke the kiss, pressing his forehead softly against yours. This time you had to catch your breath.

“Are you sure you want to do this, Y/N?” Namjoon whispered softly, asking for your permission to go on.

You pecked his lips adoringly. “I mean I’ve been dreaming about it.” Both of you chuckled lightly, caressing each other’s skin. “I couldn’t wish for more this Christmas.” You had to stifle a laugh. This was the most interesting Christmas you had ever had. And you loved it.

Namjoon made his way over to your ear with featherlight kisses to nibble on your earlobe before he hushed into your ear, making you shiver at the nickname he used for you, “I want you to tell me if you feel uncomfortable, baby girl.”

“I will,” you breathed back, enjoying the shivers that ran down your spine as Namjoon’s breath tickled your skin. You buzzed with excitement, awaiting his treatment.

“Okay, baby girl,” he moved down from your ear to your neck, nipping at the skin and grazing his teeth over your shoulder a little. “I can’t wait to taste you.”

While your breathing got heavier at these few words already, he gently pushed your thighs apart with his hands, his upper body moving in the space in between to have better access to your neck. His hands wandered over your inner thighs, setting your skin on fire and your blood boiling.

Another quiet moan escaped your mouth. It all felt just too heavenly. And it made Namjoon proud to know he was making you feel good. You deserved it and he was ready to give it to you for the rest of your life if it meant he would hear your sweet little moans.

As he nibbled lightly on your neck, his hands crawled up your shirt, pushing it up over your chest. His mouth unlatched to attach itself again to one of your nipples immediately, drawing sloppy circles around it. While one of his hands held up the shirt, the other sweetly caressed your other breast, brushing against the sensitive bud and making it stand up, aroused.

Throwing your head back, you pushed your upper body into Namjoon’s face. The treatment he blessed you with was paradisiac. If it was up to you, he could do that for the rest of eternity. Still, there was one place where you needed him a lot more…

“Joonie.” His nickname left your lips in a faint, breathless hush. He let out a breathy moan against your nipple. God, now his mind would forever replay this moment and your needy plea whenever someone would call him by this nickname. You were his rise and his fall.

He pecked your nipple one last time before looking up from in between your breasts with hooded eyes. “Yes, baby girl?”

“I need you,” you breathed out, hands still playing with his soft hair.

He cocked his head, one of his eyebrows rising. “Need me how?”

You let out a quiet, frustrated sigh. He knew exactly how, teasing you in a vulnerable moment. With your cheeks heating up, you looked away for a second. This was still very unchartered territory to you.

Feeling one of his hands back on your cheek, he tilted your head to look at him. Eyes full of genuity, he softly told you, “You don’t need to be ashamed when you’re with me. You can freely tell me what you want because I want to make you feel good.” He took your hand and pressed a lingering kiss to your temple, softly muttering against your skin, “I want you to feel safe with me.”

It was easy to tell he was being serious and honest. How did you deserve this man? You mouthed a quiet ‘thank you’ to him, feeling more at ease now. And it gave you the confidence to state your desire.

“Joonie… I need your mouth on me and your tongue in me, please,” you begged as you didn’t break off the eye contact. His eyes lit up at your words and he nodded eagerly, pressing one more kiss on your knuckles before he let your hand go.

“If you need something to hold onto, my hair is as good as anything else,” Namjoon told you, winking at you saucily before levelling his head with your clothed core. You held in a breath as he put a featherlight kiss to your inner thigh before nipping on the smooth skin.

His hands wandered over your lower legs towards your waist where they played with the hem of your pyjama shorts, ghosting over your skin. He could smell your wetness and it drove him crazy. He was just as riled up as you were.

He looked up from between your legs, giving you a very similar view as your dream had. You still couldn’t believe that this was all actually happening.

“Baby girl? Could you do me a favor?” His hands slipped back under your shirt for a second, drawing soft circles on your lower back.

You nodded eagerly, willing to do anything as long as he’d continue his exploration down your pants.

“Could you lift your hips for me a little?” He nodded towards your hips. “We need to get these out of the way.”

You obeyed his request, leaning back while lifting up your hips from the couch. All you wanted was his mouth on you.

Namjoon sucked in a breath, preparing himself for the view he was about to get. He had dreamed of that moment many, many times. In the shower when the thoughts of you got over his head, in bed when he had had another vivid dream of you in his arms.

He gently pulled down both your pyjama shorts and your panties, dragging them slowly over your legs to fully enjoy this moment. The clothing items in question hit one of the snowmen in the face as Namjoon carelessly threw them over his shoulder.

You felt the cold air hit your sensitive skin, dragging in a breath as it came in contact with the rough material of the couch. You needed release desperately right now, even little things like these throwing you off. You sank back into the couch a little.

Heartbeat strumming in his ears, Namjoon’s gaze wandered between your legs, laying eyes on your glistening folds for the first time. It was a sight to behold, at least for him. “Fuck, Y/N,” he muttered under his breath, dragging one hand through his hair while lowering back down between your legs.

“Let me make you feel good,” he whispered while pushing his arms under your legs and pulling them up on his shoulders so he could get better access. You relaxed your upper body on the backrest while shifting your hips up to the edge of the couch so that not only you were comfortable, but it would also be easier for Namjoon.

He gave you one last smile before pressing his head between your legs, his hair pleasantly tickling the inner skin of your thighs. You could feel hot puffs of breath hitting your sensitive folds, making you shiver around him. He hummed lightly, pleased at your reaction.

With his hands gently holding down your thighs, he pressed soft kisses around your pussy, nipping at the skin here and there and biting down softly. He closed his eyes, savoring the last moment before he would get to taste you.

With one hand holding you up, you entangled the other back into his hair, threading through the strands. Your soft gasps filled the air, encouraging Namjoon on.

Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore, dropping a sloppy kiss onto your pussy. Tongue darting out between his lips, he took a long lick along your glistening folds. You tasted so good, he was glad that you would be the first meal of his day besides the coffee.

A strangled moan reached his hair and he opened his eyes to watch you throw your head back in pleasure. You looked like a goddess in the dim light of the morning and the fairy lights, the sinful image burned into his mind forever.

One of his hands reached around your leg to spread your folds for him, your clit coming into view. He latched his mouth onto it, sucking it in like a starved man.

Waves of pleasure rolled over you, feet pressing down on Namjoon’s back. If he kept this up, you would be falling apart in mere minutes. Your hands tugged on his hair, urging him to continue his treatment of your pussy. “Don’t stop,” you breathed out.

He replaced his lips with his thumb, caressing your bundle of nerves while his mouth moved further down. His tongue hungrily lapped at your walls, desperate to catch every taste it could get.

Your hips moved on your own as they pressed themselves against his face willingly, desperate for a release. You could feel your orgasm slowly approaching as Namjoon worked his magic on you.

As his tongue found your entrance, he slowly pushed it inside, before swirling it around a little. You gasped for air as you could feel it massaging your walls, back arching up from the couch. After letting you adjust to the feeling of his tongue inside you, he started darting it in and out at a rapid pace, thumb still fumbling your clit.

His nickname fell from your lips like a waterfall, wonderful music to his ears. You begged him not to stop, promises of you being close spurred him on, going down on you even faster. He could feel his rock-hard cock straining against his pyjama pants, begging to be released. But it was not yet the time.

He needed you to cum all over his tongue first and, hell, he would make sure of that. Feeling your walls contracting around his tongue, he put a little more pressure on your clit, circling and rubbing it gently with his fingers, trying to take you over the edge. You were almost there, he could feel it.

“Joonie, fuck, I am-” The sentence got lost between a heavy mess of moans and whimpers as you finally came with one last stroke around Namjoon’s tongue. You closed your eyes, orgasm blazing through your body in pleasurable waves.

Namjoon lapped up everything he could get, guiding you through your orgasm. As the moans and the whimpers lessened, his mouth, albeit grudgingly, detached from your folds, pressing one last kiss to your inner thigh before he looked up about you through his lashes.

As you looked down, you were met with a very vivid image of your last night’s dream as Namjoon’s skin glowed from your juices that were smeared all around his mouth. His hair had fallen into his eyes, not able to hide the playful glint in his eyes. His cheeks were a flushed red, chest heaving for air.

“That was… amazing,” you whispered as you cupped his cheek, thumb caressing the hot skin. You leaned over him, stealing a kiss and tasting yourself on his tongue. “Thank you.”

Namjoon chuckled lightly, taking pride in making you feel so good. He nuzzled his face in your neck, breathing in your delicate scent. “I think we both actually have someone else to thank.” Both of your gazes fell onto the book that still laid open on the coffee table.

You grinned from ear to ear at his words. “Well, thank you, Santa, I guess then? For helping us idiots?” Both of you couldn’t hold in your laughter at the situation. What a naughty Christmas it had been for sure!

Quietness settled over the two of you for a minute as you enjoyed each other’s company. As Namjoon slowly got up from his kneeling position, you noticed his hard manhood through his pants. Licking your lips, you felt yourself getting wet again. Your hunger for Namjoon had only just awakened.

“How about… a shower?” you proposed, cocking a head at Namjoon. “I think it’s time I’ll take care of you.” Pushing yourself up from the couch, you let your hands roam freely over his upper body.

Namjoon snaked a hand around your waist, pulling you against him. “As if I could say no to that.” You could feel his cock through the soft fabric of his pants pressing against your thigh. Namjoon leaned down, his lips against your ear.

“Merry Christmas, Y/N,” he whispered as he softly started kissing you again under the shining lights of the fairy lights and a mistletoe magically grew down from the ceiling. Santa has his way in fulfilling wishes…

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aiweirdness · 4 years ago

Text

Alternate Rudolphs

I’ve been experimenting with generating Christmas carols using machine learning algorithms of various sizes. The smallest AIs, trained from scratch on a set of carols, tended to get confused about what exactly the carols are celebrating. GPT-2, larger and with some internet pretraining… still got confused. Its carol about Rudolph “the All-Gracious King of All the Earth” was unsettling enough before Joe Zieja’s dramatic reading and The Forever Now’s eerily calm arrangement.

Now in 2020 we have GPT-3, trained on so much of the internet that my challenge is now to stop it from simply repeating carols that it has memorized. Give it just three example carols and it will respond with another from the internet, which is technically exactly what it was rewarded for during training. To get it to generate new carols, I discovered I could give it three existing carols (I chose Hark! The Herald Angels Sing (“bruise in us the serpent’s head”), All My Heart This Night Rejoices (“sin away and for aye full atonement maketh”), and Run Run Rudolph (“and away went Rudolph a whizzing like a merry-go-round”)), plus just the title of a nonexistent carol. It would generate, for example:

Mild is Rudolph

Mild is Rudolph's image in the snow He has a shiny nose and knows how to cozy-up-nose He has a little red nose and tiny little hooves He persuaded a mischievous infant to go straight to sleep

Goodness, how downy is Rudolph's hide He has, oh his forehead, so plump and smooth and divine He has a little black snout and tiny little hooves Benevolence makes foolish young children go straight to sleep

Shy is Rudolph's figure when he's near He has a twinkle, oh in his eye, and he's kind of lean He has a bright shiny nose, and tiny little hooves He can make any child go straight to sleep

The AI has seen the existing Rudolph lore many times, however, so it would tend to drift back into singing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Sometimes it would only drift back partway.

The Carol of the Rudolphs

Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer had a very shiny nose. He kept it polished nice and clean with a white piece of soap. All of the other reindeer used to laugh and joke, and call him names like ugly, Zonker, Dunderhead. But their laughter stopped when they saw him get him speed on down the runway.

For he could change the course of the wind with his nose, and people called him Very Bright.

Rudolf, the darting reindeer knew the trail through the woods, even in the fog he could spot his mark. Eeee-merry, eeee-merry Christmas, Yes, that is his song.

He could steer a craftsman's plane, Could lead a camel home out of a trance. His tender little bat-like ears could hear a whisper, from ten miles away.

He could roar like a lion. He could fly, gliding with ease. His little rusty wheel, he would use to help create the most wonderful wheel of cheese.

Yes, Rudolf, the cherry nosed reindeer, could do all of these things and more, But the only thing his nose could not do was smell. Delectable Waffles Who knows what's in Rudolph's nose? Only Rudolph knows – And Rudolph won't tell!

The “sing the praises of Rudolph” directive seems to come through very well, especially if I give it an appropriate title.

All Hail to Rudolph

All hail to Rudolph The legend of Christmas The most famous reindeer of all

All hail to Rudolph Happy all the year From everyone we see

Heroes come and heroes go But Rudolph stays forevermore Oh boys and girls of every age Can't you hear the sleigh bells ringing?

Oh look! There's Santa and Parson Brown Defying the laws of time and space Now prepare yourself and your family my boy Prepare to get your Christmas fix

Now Rudolph goes smashing through the roof Just like a power lift with a candy-cane moustache And the deer's nose is dead-on, deadly accurate Pow! Now it's Rudolph versus Mars

All hail this joyful night All hail the night folks sing All hail to Rudolph The legend of Christmas The most famous reindeer of all

O Come Rudolph, Come

O Come Rudolph, Come Ye Faithful Oh come, come holly, clad in white, Oh come ye faithful. Oh come aloud! Oh come and join our choir, Oh make a joyful noise till earth and heaven ring.

Caw caw caw oh, caw caw caw oh, Caw holly, Caw plum this Christmas. Oh, caw caw caw, oh caw oh, caw oh oh oh, oh.

Even if I give it a title like “Rudolph is the Worst” it knows that the story of Rudolph ends with redemption. (That is, unless it goes into truly awful territory, there being a lot of ways of being the Worst in its internet training data.)

Rudolph is The Worst Reindeer

Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer Was a stubborn old reindeer. Never would you find him Participating in Christmas. Never entered his head, Of decorating a sleigh.

Then along came Bumbleboo One foggy Christmas Eve, And he said, "Rudolph with your nose so bright, Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?"

Then all the other reindeer, Gathered round to admiere him, And they nodded their heads, As they shouted out in cheer, "Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer You'll go down in history."

Other times it seemed to be going for counting songs and, like GPT-2, is weird when it counts things. Here my title prompt was “Rudolph of”.

Rudolph of Orange (Medley)

There are 15 different colors, That you see within the shirt. There is a booklet, Which identifies each one.

You’re looking at a number one, While the kids are knocking on your door. Then we started laughing, When we realized that Rudolph was near!

Courtesy of the index theory, There are only twenty eight! July is the eighth, And that’s when Christmas is!

REFRAIN:

And 1 wrapped a nose (Time now for teasing and for fun) 2 pictures, horns a cap, 3 hooves and legs and feet, 4 antlers sweeming! 5 eyes, 6 nostrils, 7 buttons, zipper, 8 bolts and bumpers, 9 flashing lights on his cap, 10 red nose, 11 furry chin, 12 rubsy ears, 13 plastic eyes, 14 laughing so joyously. 15 steps and a twisted reindeer train! 16 frosted incislotes, 17 dreamily red bow, 18 nose light, 19 velco on reins, 20 candy apple red. Two reindeer he’ll need to pull him through! It’ll be commercial Christmas, For years to come, When Rudolph gets his new reindeer team.

Supporters get bonus content: A few more carols (including “O Little Rudolph” which involves ghosts and ghouls somehow).

#neural networks #gpt-3 #carols #christmas carols #christmas songs #rudolph #rudolph of orange #incislotes #sweeming #bumbleboo

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cirusthecitrus · 2 years ago

Note

7, 20, and 28 for the ask meme!

Thanks!^^

7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate

Everything about traditional art (like watercolors, oil, pastel, street art etc. hell even colored pancils) fascinates me as much as it gives me anxiety. I love touching finished canvases, feeling them in my hands, love looking through sketchbook pages, love the smell of paint and markers, love learning about different techniques, love watching others working on their pieces, but I can't do it myself to safe my life (unless it's plain pencil or pens). For some reason my eyes and hands become very sensitive, textures of some materials make me wanna explode and I get overwhelmed real fast, so I can't really enjoy it. That's why I'm sticking to digital art lol Also, sculputre and 3D modeling are Amazing but I dunno if I'll ever try any of it, cause it looks haaard :p

20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy

Hhhm, I dunno. Maybe, facial expressions? I too can find it not easy to depict a certain microexperession or convey the exact emotion, but when it happens I only get more excited and joyful. I love challenging myself when it comes to drawing difficult expressions - especially if I'm "limited" by the specifics of character design, like the clones, who don't have actual eyebrows and visible pupils (plus they literally have the same face)

28. Any art events you have participated in the past (like zines)

Well, I've participated in Secret Santa events for artist both irl and online, it's super fun and wholesome^^

Oh and I remember back in 2018 there were weekly art challenges in one russian YandereSim fan group. Yeah the game is controversial and problematic af, but the fandom was nice and those weekly events motivated me to practice more :)

I also love Entrapdak Positivity Month, definately going to participate again! Aaand I was a part of the second Entrapdak Zine this year. Wish I could participate in the other two, but since those were early summer zines and the period from March to July is always the busiest for me it's was nearly impposible. Hopefully there're more fandom events coming soon, I'm very excited and ready to make more art!

#ask memes #ramblings #cirus doodles things

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bbrandy2002 · 5 years ago

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Happy Birthday Burnsy!

@burnsoslow

Burns,

You probably don't remember this, but the first time I ever talked to you was a reply to your comment on my fic, The Breakfast Club, in early July. I'm not sure what possessed you to reach out to me a week later in chats but, you did and its been one wild and crazy ride since then. You've certainly come a long way since we were new and mulling over those earlier stories-or in your case-Heavier Things, Chapter 1 (YOU ARE STILL WRITING THAT...LOL) . And while you have sooooo many friends here, for some reason you chose me to be your Tumbler Bestie. I hope you know you are so much more than that though ... you're my sister, my twinsie, a truly good friend. You've inspired me in ways you'll never know. I have watched you grow in your craft and reach an unprecedented level of talent that is evidenced in the quality of your work and through the amount of enthusiastic readers who can't wait for you to post the next epic chapter. You did it all through a tremendous amount of hard work, lot of tears and because you have a likeness that draws people to you. You're just truly an incredibly, special person who possesses a certain spark that makes this crazy place even better. And I think I tell you enough, but you really are one of the best writers in this fandom. And as you say to me all the time, I'm gonna say to you ... I'm one proud TBFF!! I can't thank you enough for all the late night laughs, bull sessions, real talks, 6 hour chats about nothing, letting me know when I'm being a dumbass or just being there when things get really, really tough. The fic I wrote isn't anything special and definitely could have been better, however I hope in some small way it captures the essence of our crazy friendship. Keep growing and shining and being your amazing self.

Love you my friend and Happy Birthday!!

Brandy

**You asked for Drake, Alyssa, Riley and Liam shenanigans. I don't know if this will be what you were expecting, but its what I came up with after 20 different versions. You'll recognize some of this as inside jokes or dialogue and situations from your own stories (yep, I stole them...lol). This is wacky and crazy and makes no sense. Okay Im shutting up now.

Thank you @sirbeepsalot for gutting the hell out of this on Monday night and @emceesynonymroll for SO MUCH of your help and suggestions. Also to my lovely pre-readers/keep me saners @jessiembruno and @loveellamae

Song Inspiration: You're Still The One by Shania Twain. **Drakes final dialogue will come from these lyrics.

Alyssa pulled her black mini-van through the palace gates, running over a cone and nearly taking out Michael, the security guard, in the process. Her hair was swept up into a very messy bun and her sunglasses were perched atop her head. She was wearing a blue, faded Bears sweatshirt, black leggings with a small hole in the crotch, and a mismatched pair of flip-flops -- both were for the left foot. Unable to find a close parking space, she double-parked her van in two handicapped-accessible spaces. She checked her reflection in the rear view mirror and wiped away the smudges of mascara that had run below her eyes.

She was hurt and mad as hell, yet waited until, 'DIRRTY’, finished on the radio before shutting the van off and tossing the keys in her oversized mom purse. Alyssa’s dainty fingers fumbled hastily as she tried to release the lock on her seatbelt with no luck. "You son of a bitch! Let me go!"

After pulling and tugging, twisting and karate chopping at it as hard as she could, she finally freed herself.

“HAHA! MOTHERFUCKER! GOTCHA!”

Alyssa snatched her purse and cell phone before she swung the door open, hopped out, and kicked the door shut. Still mumbling obscenities, she walked a few paces before turning back around and hitting the van’s hood with her swinging purse. “Fucking hold me hostage like that again and I’m driving your ass into a ravine!”

Everyone who knows Alyssa Walker would say she is generally a fun, loving, and sociable little woman. She’s a devoted wife who has been married to the man of her dreams for several years and a wonderful mother to their children. She's very successful professionally, having served as the Royal Education Director for 8 years. A social butterfly of sorts, she’s been known to give Maxwell a run for his money, in regards to being considered the life of any party. On most days, Alyssa is typically outgoing and joyful.

Today is not one of those days.

Her flip flops were barely hanging on as she trudged across the lawn that led to the palace gardens, thoughts of her morning crossed her mind.

For every single birthday since marrying Drake, she would wake up to the smell of bacon, scrambled eggs, and french toast wafting through the cabin. She would lay in bed and pretend to sleep until Drake and the kids burst in with a tray full of freshly prepared foods, a hot cup of coffee, and a glass of orange juice. They would shower her with kisses and hugs, sing Happy Birthday, and then wait anxiously as Alyssa took the first bite to see if their mother approved of the time and effort they put into making her birthday morning special. When she finished, like clockwork, Drake would send the kids outside with the eldest child and give Alyssa a gift that only he could give her; one that required the skilled use of his lips, hands, and the colossus that was his … well … colossus.

Except, there were no bacon, eggs, or french toast. There were no kids jumping on the bed to wish her a happy birthday and fighting over which one hugged her first. Drake did not send the kids away when she finished her breakfast nor had she risen from the bed barely able to walk from the most mind-blowing sex she’d ever had.

None of the things she expected happened.

When Alyssa woke up this morning no one was home. All she found was a letter by the coffee pot from Drake, telling her the kids went with Maxwell for the day and that he would see her after work. To make things worse, her 20 attempts to call him that morning went straight to voicemail.

Drake had been working late and acting shady for months, telling her he was helping Liam take care of some horses they were preparing for next month's derby. Lately, she was beginning to wonder if there was something more he wasn’t telling her.

Now she was late for her luncheon with Riley.

As Alyssa rounded the corner that entered the gardens, she saw Riley on the patio arranging a tray of fresh fruit and sandwiches on the table. An array of metallic birthday balloons danced and bounced from the chairs with the changing breeze. Alyssa frowned with resentment towards her best friend of over 20 years. Bitch is still in her 30s.

Riley’s focus was averted when she heard the sound of rustling leaves behind her. She turned on her heels and said, “Happy 40th Birthday, Old Lady!” Her cheery voice trailed off when she caught sight of her disheveled friend.

“Lyss? What the hell happened to you? You look like shit.”

Alyssa strode past Riley and threw her purse on the ground beside a chair before she slumped down into it.

Riley furrowed her brows with a snicker. “Bad day?”

Alyssa reached for a strawberry and dipped the entire berry, stem and all, into a dish of melted chocolate before leaving behind a trail of droplets from the dish to her mouth. As she chewed, she mewled. “Ma life if ofer!”

Riley scrunched up her face and arched back in an attempt to avoid the spittle of food that sprayed from her friend’s full mouth. She sighed heavily, grabbed a napkin, and wiped away the chunks of fruit-and-chocolate-mixed saliva that landed on her arm. “Oookaay, what’s going on? Why is your life over?”

Alyssa threw the stem on her plate and leaned forward into the table, gesticulating dramatically. “He didn’t tell me happy birthday, Ri! There was no breakfast, there was no spoiling, there was no fucking, colossus dick! There was nothing!”

“Who? Drake?”

“No, fucking Santa Clause! Of course Drake.”

Riley bit into her sandwich as Alyssa complained about Drake’s lack of attentiveness over the past few months. It wasn't the first time her friend had mentioned this to her; however, judging by how upset she was and the fact that she was dressed like a $2 hooker, she knew it was really serious now.

Alyssa continued to point out how Drake was always working and, supposedly, was helping Liam out with the horses too. When he returned home each night, his clothes were sweaty and dirty but never smelled like horse shit. To make things worse, the sex had dwindled. Alyssa could give up a lot of things in life, but Drake's dick was not one of them.

“I know he’s cheating, Ri,” she lamented, wiping a stray tear from her cheek.

“Nooo.”

“YES! He’s found another woman … someone younger, sluttier, who hasn't popped out a bunch of kids!”

Riley scoffed. “Lyss, everyone knows Drake worships the ground you walk on. I’m sure there is a good reason why he hasn’t paid as much attention to you lately.”

“But he KNOWS I’m needy and clingy and desperate for love!” she wailed.

Riley lifted the napkin from her lap and tossed it on the table. Her friend was a hot mess -- a more than usual hot mess -- and she wanted to help. She stood and walked around the table to her grieved friend and grabbed her tiny hand. “Come on.”

Alyssa’s weepy eyes stared up at her in confusion before she let out a small sniffle. “Where are we going?”

“We are going to the stables. You said he is there today, so let's go talk to him.”

Alyssa sat back in her chair and crossed her arms. “I’m not going, Ri. He needs to come to me!”

Riley began pulling on her friend's arm, but Alyssa was not being very cooperative with her efforts. “Get your ass out of the chair, Lyss, and go get your man.”

Alyssa pulled back harder. “Get off me, you skank ass ho!”

Riley continued to tug at her, surprised there was so much strength in such a little body. “Bitch, I will drag your ass and this chair all the way to the stables!”

“I’d like to see you try, dumbass!”

With a hard jerk from Riley, Alyssa’s chair tipped over and she landed on the ground. Her resolve never once faded. While Riley continued to tug at her arm, Alyssa reached over and grabbed her broken flip flop and began smacking vigorously back at her.

Riley immediately let go of her and stumbled backwards. “You have gone insane!” she groaned. “I tried to help you and, if this is how you’re gonna act, leave me out of it!” She turned to walk away and glanced back quickly. “You know the way out.”

“Ri … wait.” Alyssa called out softly to her.

Riley stopped and quirked her brow with a huff. “What?”

“Can palace security take us down? You know my ass ain’t walking that far.”

Riley called for a guard to take the 30-second drive to the stables. Both girls hopped off the cart and entered the empty barn. Riley called out for members of the stable staff while Alyssa’s eyes roamed the perimeter for her husband.

“Your Majesty? Did you need something?”

Riley turned to face the man in charge as he walked around the corner wiping his hands off with an old cloth. Before she could acknowledge him, Alyssa popped in front of her, nearly knocking her over.

“Eric!! Where’s Drake?”

The Queen smiled at the stable manager. “Eric, we’re looking for Drake.”

He looked between the two women, confusion etched across his face. “Is he supposed to be here, ma’am?”

Riley looked at Alyssa, who looked like she was ready to snap at his question, then back to Eric. “Um … yes. He told Mrs. Walker here that he would be helping in the stables today.”

“Hell … I’d say its been a good --” Eric paused to calculate before turning his attention back to the women. “--three … maybe four weeks since I last saw Walker here. Came down with King Liam to take the newest horse, Driam, out for a ride … it made me real hard ma’am”

“Hold the fuck up!” Alyssa yelled with one hand on her hip and the other covering her forehead. “He told me he has been helping out here for the last several months. Is that not true?”

Eric, realizing what is going on, backed up defensively. He could sense this was not something he wanted to be a part of. “Nope. I'm not getting in the middle of your marital woes, Ms. Alyssa.” I just want in the middle of your husbands.

Alyssa approached him and aggressively poked at his chest. “Oh, you are in so far in the middle of my woes now, Ricky boy! So drop the bros before hoes bullshit and spill what you know.”

Riley grabbed both of Alyssa's shoulders from behind and pulled her aside. “It’s not his fault, Lyss. Plus … I think Eric’s the ho in this case”

Alyssa shrugged her away and began to pace back and forth frantically. “I’m seeing sounds, Ri. I am seeing fucking sounds all over this bitch!”

“Oh God, Lyss! No! Don’t look at the sounds ... Don’t look at the sounds” She turned her frantic friend around to face her, squeezing her arms soothingly. “Look at me.”

Alyssa’s lips quivered as she stared back at her best friend. “I’ve lost him, Ri. I’ve lost him.”

“No, you haven’t.”

Alyssa sniffled through her tears and wiped her nose on her shirt sleeve. “Can me and the kids live with you now that I’m a single mother with a cheating ass husband?”

Riley pulled her into a hug, rubbing comfortingly along her back. “Of course you can, but maybe we should talk to Liam first.”

Lyss wiped her tear-stained face on Riley's shoulder and pulled back. “Liam loves me. He won’t care if I stay with you.”

Riley smiled with a nod. “Yes, he does love you, but Drake loves you too and you know that. There has to be a good explanation for everything.”

“Then why did he lie? He’s never lied to me, Ri.”

Riley gave her friend a sympathetic frown and shrugged. “I don’t know, girl, but let’s find out”

Palace security was once again summoned to haul the girls back to the palace.

Liam was in his office taking part in a video conference with Queen Elizabeth when his door burst open.

“WHERE IS MY HUSBAND?!”

His eyes went wide as he cut them to the flash of Alyssa barging in and stopping behind him at his desk; Riley was just a step behind her. Liam’s face flushed as he looked back at the camera and apologized for the interruption.

“Alyssa, dear,” he whispered. “Now is not a good time.” He motioned to the video feed on his laptop.

Alyssa turned to the laptop with the 106-year-old Queen’s face still illuminating from it. “Turn the hearing aid down, Lizzie! Unless you know where Drake is, this conversation doesn’t concern you!”

“ALYSSA!!” Liam stood, towering over her petite frame. “Are you coming for your King?” (had to put that in there lol).

“Liam, she's had a rough day and, remember, we love Alyssa,” Riley interjected with an innocent smile.

“We do, but she can’t just barge in here while I’m working!”

Alyssa grabbed his tie and yanked him down closer to her face. “Please, just tell me you know where Drake is. He said he was working for you and he’s not. He didn’t tell me happy birthday, he didn’t make my breakfast, and he didn’t fuck my brains out this morning!”

“Oh My!”

Alyssa turned back to the laptop. “I thought I told you to turn your hearing aid down, you old coot!”

Liam’s hands covered his face in embarrassment as he fell back into his chair.

Alyssa crouched down in front of Liam and pulled his hands from his face. “Real talk, Li. Did you or did you not ask Drake to work for you?”

He stared at her for a moment with a deer-in-the-headlights look. He knew exactly where his best friend was and what he was doing -- he had known for months -- but he couldn’t tell her that.

Nervous, Liam knew there was one way to solve this problem. He reached over to his intercom and pressed the call button. “Bastien.”

A split second later, the door to Liam’s office opened and the head guard entered. “Your Majesty?” he said as he bowed.

“Yes, could you see Alyssa and my wife out, please.”

Exasperated with Liam's request, Alyssa stood back up and eyed Bastien with a steely glare. “I’m not afraid of this bitch! He’s the one who raised the man whore my husband became with all his hookers and shit. My children are fatherless now because of you!”

Refusing to leave, Alyssa plopped down on Liam’s lap and gripped the armrests of his chair tightly with both hands. Her bony ass caused him to yelp as it dug into the muscles of his thigh. She reached for Liam’s scotch and took a sip before leaning down so that her face could be picked up by the camera.

“Alright, Liz, help a fellow girl out here! You have a lot of experience with a cheating ass spouse and son … should I rip his big, beautiful nuts off? Orrrr … just take it up the ass like you did?"

The Queen of England clutched her chest with an exasperated expression. "Little lady … your behavior is simply prudish and insulting. I highly suggest you learn proper etiquette when addressing me … and, as for your husband, I can see why the poor man's eyes have roamed with such an immoral and, need I dare say, crazed woman such as yourself for a wife."

"Conversation over, bitch!" Alyssa threw the rest of Liam’s drink at the screen, hoping it drenched the queen and slammed the laptop shut.

"God Dammit!" Liam yelled out while he wrapped his arms around her from behind before standing up and handing her off to his guard.

With Bastien holding Alyssa in his arms, her little legs dangling and kicking at his shins, Riley took action.

The Queen grabbed her friend's feet, which were now bare from her crumbled flip flops, and tried with all her might to pull her back.

"You’re gonna break her hip, Bastien! She's an old, feeble woman now! She could have osteoporosis or the menopause!”

Giving their best efforts to escape, including Alyssa's teeth being firmly sunk into Bastien’s upper arm, neither were able to overpower his strength.

While carrying Alyssa and dragging Riley -- who was still holding onto her friends legs -- Bastien was able to get the two of them out of Liam's office and into the main corridor.

Alyssa followed Riley back to her quarters, where she was given a pair of flip-flops and new leggings from Riley’s 12-year-old daughter’s closet. The hole in the crotch of her leggings had completely blown out during the struggle with Bastien. There were still no answers or replies from Drake, and Alyssa was beginning to feel utterly hopeless.

Alyssa started to raid the royal couple’s liquor cabinet, happy to swipe a bottle of Balkan vodka, when Riley had an idea. She snapped her fingers with a sly grin. “I know someone who can help us find Drake.”

“Who?”

The ladies left the quarters and walked downstairs to the ballroom. Once inside, Alyssa took a hard swig of vodka and eyed the utility closet Riley stopped in front of with a questioning look.

The Queen gave four quick knocks followed by two slow ones and the door unlocked. Mara had been working out of this closet for years, having been fired after a fall out with Alyssa during a costume ball that nearly got her killed. The former guard walked in there during that ball and just never came back out. Riley and Bastien were the only two people who knew about this and told no one -- Bastien purely for comical reasons and Riley for a certain skill the woman possessed.

Alyssa was surprised to find the woman hiding out there after all these years. "I thought you fired her ass! I nearly got a traumatic brain injury and hearing loss from her incompetence!"

"Shhh!" Riley pulled her friend inside, peeking around the ballroom to ensure no one was looking, and shut the door quickly.

Riley explained how Liam revoked her cell phone pinging privileges with the guards before the costume ball all those years ago. Apparently, he wasn't too keen on her stalking the entire cast of Friends. He did what he had to do when a restraining order from Matthew Perry came across his desk. Mara, however, was still able to ping into anyone’s phone, thus, the Queen allowed her to stay.

“That's amazing,” Alyssa remarked. She pursed her lips as she scanned the tight space of the closet. “Can she find … maybe … Dwayne Johnson?”

Riley nodded. “Bitch can find anyone.” She looked to Mara, who was sitting at her desk, and winked with approval.

“Okay,” Alyssa clapped and leaned over Mara’s shoulder. “Let’s find him … I wanna know where Drake is!”

Within several seconds, an unfamiliar address popped up on the screen. It was close to the Walker cabin but still not somewhere Alyssa knew of.

She reached for a pen and a pad of paper from Mara’s desk and started to write down the location. “I can’t believe he lied to me this whole time! I must be really stupid for him to think he could actually get away with this.” Alyssa tossed the pen back on the desk and ripped the sheet of paper off the pad. “They’re gonna write a country song about me, Ri,” she cried. “Poppa’s in the graveyard and Momma’s in the pen! I just need a shotgun and for my damn dog to run away and I’ve got a hit!”

The two snuck out of the utility closet and ran to Alyssa’s van. Alyssa pulled the ticket for double parking in handicapped spaces from her wiper blade and threw it in her glove box with the rest of her parking tickets. Riley shoveled away the piles of empty, diet coke cans and cheese whisps bags from the passenger seat into the parking lot when she opened her door.

Alyssa squealed her tires as she burned rubber down the palace drive, taking out the same cone again, nearly running down Michael again, and driving straight through the lowered arm of the security gate.

“WOOOO!” Riley yelled as they sped through the streets of Cordonia into the countryside. “This is just like old times in college, huh, Lyss?”

“I suppose. We’re just not high as fuck.” Alyssa raised her eyebrows and grinned slyly with an all too familiar gleam in her eyes that Riley recognized immediately. “Say … grab my purse, Ri.”

“Oh God! I know that look. We're gonna get smashed aren't we?" Riley extended her arm behind the driver's seat. Alyssa reached into the side pocket of her purse and pulled out the rolled up, clear baggie and tossed it to her friend.

Unrolling the bag, Riley began to bounce in her seat with anticipation of smoking weed for the first time in 15 years. The excitement quickly faded.

“Um, Lyss?”

“Hmm?”

“I know I haven’t smoked pot in a while, but this looks like a bag of carrot sticks.”

“Give me that, dumbass!” Alyssa glanced over and snatched the bag. She held the bag over the steering wheel and examined it for herself. “Well fuck!! Looks like one of my kids had a really interesting snack yesterday at school. Oh well”

After a twenty-minute drive from the palace into a forested section of Cordonia, Alyssa and Riley stopped in front of a long gravel road. Riley double-checked the address on the van’s GPS with what was written on the paper.

“It says this is it. Look’s kind of desolate,” Riley mused, not sure where the isolated road would lead.

Alyssa turned the steering wheel of her van, probably a little too tipsy to drive considering she had consumed a quarter of a bottle of vodka (that the author of this story forgot about). They made it there, nonetheless, and no one was hurt. Never drink and drive!!

Lush, plentiful trees and a wooden fence lined the gravel road that seemed to lead to nowhere until they came upon a clear view of Lake Cordonia. Drake’s truck was sitting in front of a large wooden cabin with a huge, flat yard and one of the most stunning views of the lake either woman had seen anywhere. Alyssa tried to keep it together ... until she didn’t. When she saw Drake standing on the front porch, casually drinking a beer, shirtless and wiping his forehead with his denim shirt, she skidded the van into park next to his truck.

Drake’s eyes widened when he saw his wife get out of the van wielding an ice scraper in one hand and a tire iron in the other, a look of pure hell in her eyes.

He took a small step back. He hadn’t seen her like this since a drunken Olivia grabbed his ass at a Beaumont Bash two years ago. Drake waved his hands in front of her defensively. “Baby girl … wh … what’s going on right now?”

“Don’t you baby girl me!” Alyssa threw the ice scraper and Drake ducked just in time as it flew over his head.

Drake had no idea what the hell she was so pissed off about, but she was approaching him quickly and twirling the tire iron in her hands. He jumped over the railing of the porch and took off running around the side of the house. As he rounded the rear corner of the home, he ran directly into Riley, who was waiting to block him. The plan was a good one -- it really was -- but her thin frame was no match against the much larger Drake. With a hard thud, Riley fell backward, which caused his body to trip over her and land face down on the ground.

Drake rolled over on his back and shook his head in an attempt to get the daze out of his frazzled brain. There she was, standing over him, holding the tire iron like a bat, ready to pounce him without a second thought.

“Baby! Please tell me what’s wrong.”

“You … you’re a cheater and a liar!”

Drake went to sit up but laid back down when Alyssa flinched the hardened steel at him. “The fuck you talking about, Lyssa?”

With months of building suspicions and hurt, Alyssa took a long, deep breath and let it all out with a wail.

“I’m talking about the late nights, the shady-as-shit lies you have spewed to me over and over again. I’m talking about you missing out on dinners, coming home and falling on the bed without a word to anyone. I’m talking about only having sex with me every other day and forgetting my birthday. Now, me and the kids have to live with Liam, who hates me now because I told Queen Elizabeth she got fucked in the ass! It’s because I’m old now, isn’t it? You wanna be a Bastien and have bunga bunga sex parties with skank ass whores who have big boobies and wear their panties around their ankles! And … I just can’t compete, Drake … I just can’t.”

Drake held his hand up to block any sudden swings in his direction. “Can I get up?”

Alyssa nodded her head before she turned away from him and dropped the tire iron to the ground. “Just tell why, dammit?” she whimpered. “Was I not enough?!”

“Not enough? NOT ENOUGH?!!” He quickly rose to his feet, twisted her around and brought her flush against his hard body. With tears in his eyes, he kissed the top of her head, his thick hands sunken into her lush, brown hair. He was barely able to mutter a single word. He was visibly shaken and broken by her accusations and that she held those feelings about herself for so long.

With both hands now on the sides of her face, he tilted her head so that she was looking directly at him. “Alyssa!” he sobbed softly. “Don’t you dare ever say you aren’t enough for me … ever! You’re literally my whole world. In every single life, in any alternate universe … I choose you every single time. And you wanna know what I’ve been doing? Look!” He turned her around to face the house.

“This is what I’ve been doing all those months! I built it, with my bare hands, just for you, for your birthday. I wanted you to have a bigger home so you could get out of that small cabin and have the view and the yard you always dreamt of. I wasn’t cheating and I didn't forget your birthday. I just wanted you to have everything you deserve”

Alyssa gave Drake a quizzical look. “But … you’re terrible at woodworking.”

Drake chuckled. “Maybe I love you enough I learned.”

Alyssa sunk to her knees, not to give a blow job, but realization and understanding of the last few months had set in. She stared up at the beautiful, two-story log cabin that had every bit of her husband’s heart and soul for her in it and wept. “Drake.” Her voice was raspy and full of guilt. “I’m so, so sorry.’

He crouched down behind her and wrapped his loving arms around Alyssa before placing a gentle nip at her ear. “You've nothing to be sorry for. I guess I gave you plenty of reasons to think that, but I was crunched for time and wanted to surprise you. Just hope you like it.”

“It’s magnificent … and it’s our home?”

“It's our home. Happy Birthday, Baby girl.”

Drake and Alyssa checked on Riley, who was still knocked out cold. After assisting her and giving her a moment to collect herself, Alyssa thanked her friend for all of her help and gave her the keys to the van to return home in.

Drake showed his wife around their new cabin, pointing out the lowered cabinets in the kitchen that would be easier for her to reach. He had built her a library where she could work from and read without the noise and chaos of a house full of children running around. She was thrilled over the balcony that sat just off their bedroom, overlooking the lake and featuring private jacuzzi tub where they could relax together and, of course, have sex in.

Drake took her outside and walked down to the lake, where he had put a gazebo in overlooking the water and ushered her to the center of it.

“Drake! This is amazing. How did you know I wanted this?”

He drew her closer to him and kissed the tip of her nose. “I know everything about you, Lyssa … there’s nothing I wouldn’t give you.”

She smiled up at him lovingly. “And I love you so much for it.”

He reached for one of her tiny hands, brought it to his chest, and wrapped his other arm around her back. With very little room between them, he kissed her lips tenderly. “Dance with me, Alyssa.”

Alyssa gave him a knowing look with a grin. “Drake Walker doesn’t like to dance.”

He began to sway with her to music that wasn’t there, but he felt it in his heart. “Drake Walker will always dance with his girl.” Kissing her once more, they began to slowly dance together and Alyssa had never felt more alive or loved in her life. He has that effect on her--always had and always will.

He spun her in a twirl and pulled her tiny body back into his own. “Ya know, Lyssa … when I first saw you, I saw love.”

Drake reached down and lifted the bottom of her sweatshirt over her head and tossed it on a nearby bench. He caressed her cheek and trailed a gentle line down her neck and across her shoulder. “And the first time you touched me, Baby Girl ...I felt love.”

His lips found that sweet spot just behind her ear before he whispered to her. “And after all this time ...”

Drake’s thumb grazed across her bottom lip before he stared into the blue eyes of his yesterday, today, and forever. “You’re still the one I love.”

What happens next? .......

#drake walker #drake x ALYSSA #alyssa devereaux

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dossypet · 5 years ago

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Memories at Christmas - Lucifer Fanfic Secret Santa Gift

My Secret Santa was @unicorn-vibes-99 ! I hope you like it! :)

Lucifer was so over Christmas. Don’t get him wrong, he loved the idea of gifts and spending time with people he actually liked, he just hated that whole all about DAD part. I mean the man already had his followers worshiping him year round, did he really need a whole season? Besides His actual birthday would be about July 17th on the Earth calendar. So that is why, when asked what fun things he would be doing for Christmas by one favorite, female detective, Lucifer’s reply was, “Bah Humbug I say. Who needs that silly old holiday? Now Valentine’s day is really where it’s at!”

Chloe shook her head. Of course the man who had “God” Dad issues would take offence to the happy season. “Oh come on Lucifer, it’s not that bad! There’s parties with friends, giving the people you love gifts, being cozy around the fire?” She gave him a half grin, “But before we can properly celebrate we have to finish this case.” She grabbed her coat and as they walked out to the car Chloe filled Lucifer in on the case.

Unknown to Chloe as they were walking away, Lucifer wasn’t listening to a single thing she said. His mind was stuck on something she had said way before. “Giving the people you can actually stand gifts, wild parties, and cuddling by a fire.” Well maybe not her exact words but most of the main idea was there. If he got the detective a gift she liked, well then clearly that would mean actually fun, Adult, partying ending in a night of bliss. Lucifer was over the moon. Was his Detective finally opening up for him? Letting loose? Well he was not going to let this chance pass him. Determined, Lucifer mind raced with ideas as they finally arrived at the crime scene.

As they passed the police line, Ella greeted them with a smile. “Merry Christmas guys! Well, maybe not so merry for this poor guys.” She grimaced with a chuckle. “Meet Jacob Marley. A wealthy business partner to Accounting Credit Firm. Sign show foul play. Strangled to death by this Christmas decoration chain.

She was cut off by Lucifer, “AHA! Christmas! See Detective? If this poor man had not celebrated Christmas, he would probably still be alive.”

Chloe rolled her eyes and waved her hand dismissively. “Any Witnesses or suspects yet?”

Ella gave a quick nod, “A couple people saw him last night, we found them from the security cameras and called them in. A couple of people asking for charity donations, Jacob’s nephew, and his business partner John Albert. They’re all over there if you want to question them.” Chloe nodded her thanks and started heading over when Lucifer called out to her.

“Ah- I’ll be there in just a second detective! I just need to uh ask Miss Lopez over here a quick… hmm private! Yes. Private question.” Both girls gave Lucifer a weird look but used to his antics, Chloe rolled her eyes and walked on. Now that the Detective was gone Lucifer grinned. “SO! Miss Lopez you know female things, mostly and you’re rather close to the Detective yes?”

Ella Smirked at him, “yes? I like to think Chloe and I are close, why?”

Lucifer checked to make sure they were out of earshot before asking, “I’m rather stuck on what to get the detective for the holidays. Do you have any clues on something she would love? Normally I would just ask what she desires but that doesn’t work on her. Maybe some expensive jewelry, or a car?”

Ella raised an eyebrow at him, “Oh come on Lucifer, as much as Chloe would like those things, Christmas is about giving from the heart! She doesn’t care about how much money a gift costs, she cares about the thought behind it. Hey! An experience is always a fun gift and it can come from the heart! What about volunteering together at a soup kitchen?”

Lucifer wrinkled his nose in disgust. “If I wanted to bring the Detective somewhere with less class than she deserves, then I would bring her to Detective douchebag's house. You’re no help.” With that he walked after the detective who was currently interviewing the deceased man’s nephew.

“I just popped over to invite him to our family dinner. I mean he never comes, but he was family so even if he stood us up every single year, no one deserves to be alone on Christmas.” The nephew, Fred Clifford seemed distraught as he mournfully informed Chloe on why he was there the day before.

“Inviting the old man even after he turned you down over and over again? That must have really hurt, unless it was something else you were after hm?” Lucifer grinned popping in, “Your uncle over there was a very wealthy man and after all Christmas is a very expensive time of year, so tell me, what was it that you truly desired?”

“I… I..” Fred studdered then finished suddenly, “I wanted us to be a family again.” Suddenly snapping out of Lucifer’s gaze. “I just wanted us to be together again and for him to be happy.” Fred mumbled lowering his gaze.

Lucifer and Chloe shared a look. The nephew was clearly not busy plotting murder for the holidays. Chloe nodded her head and replied, “I’m sorry for your loss, thank you for your time and we’ll be in contact if we have any further questions.

“Well that was a waste of time.” Lucifer grumbled as they headed over to their final witness, the victim’s business partner John Albert.

“Well at least we know it’s not him. They donation collectors just said the victim wrote him a check for zero dollars, laughed, then slammed the door shut. After insulting the victim more the collector told me he went to the next house and the neighbors confirmed this with a different officer.”

“Hmm, might be an easy case then with only one visitor left.” Lucifer commented. He grinned. Perfect. Solve the case quickly and he could start looking for gifts for the Detective. Everything would work out perfectly. He grinned as they reached their final witness

“Hell-” Chloe tried to say before being rudely cut off.

“I’m not saying a THING until my lawyer gets here.” John Albert grumbled looking snidely at the pair.

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “Well that’s not reason to be so cross.” He humphed.

The old man laughed crossly and waggled his finger at Lucifer, “Christmas is a bunch of nonsense. All people do is spend money they don’t have to get more things they don’t need. It’s a bunch of greedy nonsense if you ask me!”

“AH! Now that IS something we can agree on! But besides that we can agree that you murdered your partner. Case closed let’s go Detective.”

“You have no proof.” John argued looking smug. “You can’t pin anything on me! I know how this works! Christmas is a big joke just like you two!”

Chloe held up a hand as Lucifer was about to argue back, “What were you doing here last night? The cameras pin you here within the time of the murder.”

“Working a deal of course! Jacob had some nonsense in his head about selling his part of the business and giving it to his nephew. I talked him out of that nonsense and left! Now I won’t say anything else until my lawyer gets here!”

Chloe pulled Lucifer aside. “Maybe John didn’t like the thought of possibly losing money to Jacob’s nephew so he killed him so he could keep the entire business?” Lucifer nodded. Seemed simple enough. “I’ll go get a warrant to look at his records.” Meet back at the station in an hour?” Lucifer nodded and they split ways.

Lucifer took a cab to a high end mall. As he walked the stores he frowned thinking of what Miss Lopez had said and shook his head. If The Detective didn’t want an expensive gift, and he refused to make her do some lowly servitude job, what could he get her? Lucifer paused as he looked into a music shop. He froze when his eyes landed on a small children’s piano as memories flooded back to him.

It was back when he was but a fledgling of an angle, long before humanity was created. Dad had picked him up told him he had a surprise for him. It had been his first piano about the size of the one he saw in the shop. Lucifer had played that piano until he had gotten an adult one. But that was all back before Dad had betrayed him and everything had fallen apart.

Lucifer blinked several times coming out of that memory. He hummed in thought. He had almost forgotten that memory of happier, joyful times. He then thought back to the third witness from their case. Lucifer’s frown deepened. Just because he didn’t want to celebrate his father did not mean he had to become a self centered curmudgeon like John Albert. With a nod and his determination renewed, Lucifer prowled the storefronts for the perfect gift.

Finally he decided on two gifts. The first was clearly the favorite. It was a Glass centerpiece that was lavashed in jewels and gold, something one might find in a millionaire's house. The second, Lucifer got only because of Ella’s words about coming from “the heart” It was a small framed photo of Lucifer, Chloe, and Trixie from their game night. Lucifer secretly smiled every time he saw it and embarrassed wondered if he should even bother giving it. The frame wasn’t flashy or big. The photo wasn’t classy nor eye catching. Nevertheless, Lucifer dutifully wrapped it along with the centerpiece and was about to head to the station when his phone buzzed. Chloe had texted him stating, “Forget about the warrant, found DNA on Victim belonging to John Albert, plus destroyed camera in neighbor’s trash that Ella found that has video of the murder. Meet at John’s house for arrest. 5847 Sunride AVE. NW”

With a chuckle Lucifer headed out holding onto his two gifts for Chloe. He arrived late as Chloe’s car was already there. Lucifer shrugged and started to head in when suddenly -

B A N G!

“WAIT NO-!”

CRASH!

The door Lucifer was about to go through had slammed open and John Albert himself was trying to escape. Unfortunately, He had slammed right into Lucifer making him drop and break the expensive centerpiece. With a rage, Lucifer grabbed the man and picked him up.

“You owe me several hundred dollars and the perfect Christmas gift!” Lucifer growled

“Lucifer! You got him! Easy. I’ll cuff him.” Chloe grinned putting her gun away and grabbing the cuffs. She quickly put him in the back of her car while Lucifer glumly threw the broken present away. “Ready to go?” She asked him confused as he looked miserably as a small square package.

“Er… I wanted to give this to you Detective.. Sorry I know it’s not a very good gift..” He frowned and held out the teal package. Curiously, Chloe took it and slowly opened it.

“Oh Lucifer!” He looked up and instead of disappointment on her face she glowed with a huge smile on her face, “I love it! Thank you!”

“You… you love it?” Lucifer asked incredulously.

“Yes!” Chloe laughed, “And I’m sure Trixie will too! Why don’t you come over tonight and join us for some hot coco and Christmas movies?” She asked

“Well… It’s not the adult party I was hoping for…” Lucifer grinned, “But It’ll have to do. Come on Detective! This murderer isn’t going to bring himself to jail! We have hot coco to drink!” With that he hurried into the car. Maybe this whole Christmas thing wouldn’t be so bad after all.

(Merry Christmas! Hope you liked it!) :)

#Lucifer #chloe decker #Christmas #dekerstar #lucifer morningstar #lucifer secret santa #dossy speaks #dossy writes #fanfic #fanfiction #lucifer fanfiction

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sleepykittypaws · 6 years ago

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2019 Holiday Classics

Where to watch not-new holiday movies, animated specials and my made-for-TV favorites this season. (NOTES: Only initial seasonal airing is noted here, but channels frequently re-air holiday classics multiple times during the season; Check local listings for potential additional dates. Network or basic cable-aired films may be edited for content or time.)

Updated: December 31, 2019

ABC

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving (1973 animated special) - Nov. 27

This is America, Charlie Brown: The Mayflower Voyagers (1988 animated special) - Nov. 27

Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town (1970 Rankin-Bass animated special) - Dec. 1

A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965 animated special) - Dec. 5

Olaf’s Frozen Adventure (2017 special based on the characters from Disney’s Frozen) - Dec. 12

Toy Story That Time Forgot (2014 animated special) - Dec. 12

The Sound of Music (1965 movie musical classic starring Julie Andrews) - Dec. 15

Shrek the Halls (2007 animated special) - Dec. 17

Disney Prep & Landing (2009 animated special) - Dec. 19

Prep & Landing 2: Naughty v Nice (2011 animated special sequel) - Dec. 19

I Want a Dog for Christmas, Charlie Brown (2003 animated special) - Dec. 22

Happy New Year, Charlie Brown (1985 animated special) - Dec. 26

NBC

It’s a Wonderful Life (Frank Capra’s 1946 classic starring Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed) - Nov. 30

Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (1966 animated special) - Dec. 3

A Legendary Christmas with John and Chrissy (2018 variety special with John Legend and Chrissy Teigen) - Dec. 12 ***Review***

Dreamworks: Trolls Holiday - (2017 animated special, featuring characters from the 2016 Dreamworks feature film) - Dec. 14 Review

Dr. Suess’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000 live-action film, starring Jim Carrey) - Dec. 25

CBS

Frosty the Snowman (1969 animated special) - Nov. 29

Frosty Returns (1992 animated special) - Nov. 29

Robbie the Reindeer: Hooves of Fire (2002 animated special) - Nov. 30

Robbie the Reindeer in Legend of the Lost Tribe (2002 animated special) - Nov. 30

The Story of Santa Claus (1996 animated special) - Nov. 30

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (1964 animated special) - Dec. 2

I Love Lucy Christmas Special (colorized version of “The Christmas Episode” and, for the first time, “Paris at Last”) - Dec. 20

FOX

Ice Age: A Mammoth Christmas (2011 animated special based on the movie series) - Dec. 1

A Christmas Story LIVE! (musical adaptation of the 1983 movie and subsequent Broadway musical starring Maya Rudolph) - Dec. 24 **Review**

Top 12 Greatest Christmas Movie Moments (2016 special) - Dec. 25

Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer (2000 animated special) - Nov. 29

PBS

The Cat in the Hat Knows A Lot About Christmas (2012 animated special) - Dec. 2

Let’s Go Luna: Christmas Around the World (2018 animated special) - Dec. 2

Wild Kratts: A Creature Christmas (2015 animated Christmas special) - Dec. 2

Peg + Cat + Holidays (2014 animated special) - Dec. 2

Curious George: A Very Monkey Christmas (2019 animated movie) - Dec. 3

Handel’s Messiah (orchestral performance) - Dec. 23

Rick Steves’s European Christmas (2005 special celebrating the holidays across Europe) - Dec. 24

Freeform

Home Alone (1990 comedy starring Macaulay Culkin) - Nov. 12

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992 comedy starring Macaulay Culkin) - Nov. 12

Home Alone 3 (1997 made-for-TV sequel) - Nov. 12

Home Alone 4: Taking Back the House (2002 direct-to-DVD sequel) - Nov. 13

The Holiday (2006 movie starring Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz) - Nov. 14

Home Alone: Holiday Heist (2012 direct-to-DVD sequel) - Nov. 14

Miracle on 34th St. (1994 remake of the classic starring Mara Wilson) - Nov. 15

Frozen (2013 animated Disney movie) - Nov. 16

Dr. Suess’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000 live-action film, starring Jim Carrey) - Nov. 17

Richie Rich’s Christmas Wish (1998 movie) - Nov. 17

Love the Coopers (2015 movie starring Diane Keaton and John Goodman) - Nov. 18

The Truth About Christmas (2018 made-for-TV holiday movie starring Kali Hawk) - Nov. 19 (Trailer) ****Review****

Deck the Halls (2006 movie starring Danny Devito) - Nov. 20

Life-Size 2: A Christmas Eve (2018 made-for-TV movie starring Tyra Banks) - Nov. 21 (Teaser, Trailer)

Rise of the Guardians (2012 Dreamworks animated movie) - Nov. 24

Arthur Christmas (2011 animated movie) - Nov. 30

The Santa Clause (1994 Disney movie starring Tim Allen and Martin Short) - Nov. 30

The Santa Clause 2 (2002 Disney movie sequel starring Tim Allen) - Nov. 30

The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (2006 Disney movie sequel starring Tim Allen) - Nov. 3

The Little Drummer Boy (1968 Rankin-Bass stop-motion special) - Dec. 2

The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992 movie starring Michael Caine) - Dec. 2

Santa Baby (2006 made-for-TV movie starring Jennie McCarthy) - Dec. 3

The Preacher’s Wife (1996 remake of The Bishop’s Wife, starring Denzel Washington) - Dec. 3

Decorating Disney: Holiday Magic (2017 special looking at how the Disney parks are decorated for Christmas) - Dec. 3

Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town (1970 Rankin-Bass special) - Dec. 3

Santa Baby 2: Christmas Maybe (2009 made-for-TV movie sequel starring Jennie McCarthy) - Dec. 4

Holiday in Handcuffs (2007 made-for-TV movie starring Melissa Joan Hart and Mario Lopez) - Dec. 5

Kung Fu Panda Holiday (2010 animated special) - Dec. 5

Unaccompanied Minors (2006 family movie staring Lewis Black) - Dec. 5

The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993 Tim Burton stop-motion animation movie) - Dec. 6

Frosty the Snowman (1969 animated special) - Dec. 6

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (1964 animated special) - Dec. 6

Cricket on the Hearth (1967 animated special based on the Charles Dickens’ story) - Dec. 7

I’ll Be Home for Christmas (1998 Disney movie starring Jonathan Taylor Thomas) - Dec. 8

Prancer Returns (2001 sequel to Prancer) - Dec. 8

The Mistle-Tones (2012 made-for-TV movie starring Tori Spelling and Tia Mowry-Hardrict) - Dec. 10

12 Dates of Christmas (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Amy Smart) - Dec. 11

This Christmas (2007 movie starring Loretta Devine) - Dec. 12

The Perfect Holiday (2007 movie starring Gabrielle Union) - Dec. 12

Snow (2004 made-for-TV movie starring Tom Cavanagh) - Dec. 12

Love the Coopers (2015 movie starring Diane Keaton and John Goodman) - Dec. 13

Disney’s Prep & Landing: Naughty vs Nice (2011 animated special sequel) - Dec. 16

Snowglobe (2007 made-for-TV movie starring Christina Milian) - Dec. 19

Snow 2: Brain Freeze (2008 made-for-TV movie sequel starring Tom Cavanagh) - Dec. 20

Toy Story That Time Forgot (2014 animated special) - Dec. 20

Disney Fairy Tale Weddings: Holiday Magic (2017 holiday special) - Dec. 23

AMC

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (1989 movie starring Chevy Chase) - Nov. 25

Gremlins (1984 movie directed by Steven Spielberg) - Nov. 26

Call me Claus (2001 made-for-TV movie starring Whoopi Goldberg) - Nov. 26

To Grandmother’s House We Go (1992 made-for-TV movie starring Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen) - Nov. 26

Legend of Frosty the Snowman (2005 animated special) - Nov. 26

Christmas with the Kranks (2004 movie starring Tim Allen) - Nov. 26

Elf (2003 movie starring Will Ferrell) - Nov. 26

Jack Frost (1998 movie starring Michael Keaton) - Nov. 27

12 Dogs of Christmas: Great Puppy Rescue (2012 made-for-TV kids movie) - Nov. 27

Last Holiday (2006 movie starring Queen Latifah) - Nov. 27

Fred Claus (2007 movie starring Vince Vaughn) - Nov. 27

Four Christmases (2008 movie starring Reese Witherspoon) - Nov. 27

The Great Christmas Light Fight (seasons 1-4 of the reality competition series from 2015-18) - Nov. 28

Prancer (1989 movie starring Sam Elliott) - Nov. 29

The Polar Express (2004 animated movie starring Tom Hanks) - Nov. 29

A Miracle on Christmas Lake (2016 made-for-TV movie) - Nov. 29

Wish for Christmas (2016 made-for-TV movie starring Joey Lawrence) - Nov. 29

The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus (1985 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas (1974 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Little Drummer Boy: Book II (1976 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

The Story of the First Christmas Snow (1975 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

The Leprechauns’ Christmas Gold (1981 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Nestor, the Long-Eared Christmas Donkey (1977 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Jack Frost (1979 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Rudolph and Frosty’s Christmas in July (1979 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Frosty’s Winter Wonderland (1976 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Rudolph’s Shiny New Year (1976 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Pinocchio’s Christmas (1980 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

The Year Without a Santa Claus (1974 Rankin/Bass animated special) - Nov. 30

Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987 movie starring John Candy and Steve Martin) - Dec. 2

All I Want for Christmas (1991 family movie) - Dec. 2

Samantha: An American Girl Holiday (2004 made-for-TV movie) - Dec. 3

Beethoven’s Christmas Adventure (2011 made-for-TV sequel) - Dec. 3

A Holiday To Remember (1995 made-for-TV remake starring Connie Sellica and Randy Travis) - Dec. 3

Heaven is for Real (2014 movie starring Greg Kinnear) - Dec. 3

Snow Day (2000 movie starring Chevy Chase) - Dec. 4

Ernest Saves Christmas (1998 movie starring Jim Varney) - Dec. 4

White Christmas (1954 movie classic starring Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye and Rosemary Clooney) - Dec. 5

The Sons of Mistletoe (2001 made-for-TV movie starring Doris Roberts) - Dec. 5

Miracle on 34th St. (1994 John Hughes movie remake starring Elizabeth Perkins) - Dec. 5

Merry Madagascar (2009 animated special based on the Madagascar movie series) - Dec. 8

Happy Feet (2006 animated movie) - Dec. 8

Ice Age (2002 animated movie starring Denis Leary) - Dec. 9

Joyful Noise (2012 movie starring Queen Latifah and Dolly Parton) - Dec. 9

Miracles from Heaven (2016 movie starring Jennifer Garner) - Dec. 9

A Christmas Story 2 (direct-to-DVD 2012 sequel) - Dec. 10

A Dennis the Menace Christmas (2007 movie starring Robert Wagner) - Dec. 10

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas (2011 movie starring Neil Patrick Harris) - Dec. 11

Michael Bublé’s Christmas in Hollywood (2015 variety special) - Dec. 11

How Murray Saved Christmas (2014 animated special based on the children’s book) - Dec. 13

Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer (2000 animated special) - Dec. 13

The Madagascar Penguins In a Christmas Caper (2005 animated special based on the Madagascar movie character and spin-off TV series) - Dec. 14

Love the Coopers (2015 movie starring Diane Keaton and John Goodman) - Dec. 16

Donkey’s Caroling Christmas-tacular (2011 animated Dreamworks special) - Dec. 18

The Nativity Story (2006 movie starring Keisha Castle-Hughes and Oscar Isaac) - Dec. 19

Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas is You (original animated movie based on the 2015 children’s book of the same title; featuring Mariah Carey) - Dec. 23 (Trailer) Review

Sundance

Christmas in Connecticut (1945 movie classic starring Barbara Stanwyck) - Dec. 20

Christmas in Connecticut (1992 movie remake directed by Arnold Schwarzenegger) - Dec. 20

Hallmark Channel

Snow Bride (2013 made-for-TV movie starring Katrina Law) - Oct. 29

Naughty or Nice (2012 made-for-TV movie starring Hilarie Burton) - Oct. 29

A Holiday Engagement (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Bonnie Somerville) - Nov. 1

The Nine Lives of Christmas (2014 made-for-TV movie starring Brandon Routh) - Nov. 1

A Boyfriend for Christmas (2004 made-for-TV movie starring Kelli Williams) - Nov. 1

Hallmark Movies & Mysteries

The Christmas Card (2006 made-for-TV movie starring Ed Asner) - Oct. 29

Hallmark Drama

A Season for Miracles (1999 made-for-TV Hallmark Hall of Fame movie starring Carla Gugino) - Oct. 23

A Family Thanksgiving (2010 made-for-TV movie starring Daphne Zuniga) - Nov. 1

Flight of the Reindeer (2000 made-for-TV movie starring Richard Thomas) - Nov. 2

The Christmas Gift (1986 made-for-TV movie starring John Denver) - Nov. 3

Lifetime

Snowed Inn Christmas (2017 made-for-TV movie starring Andrew Walker) - Oct. 31

Kristin’s Christmas Past (2013 made-for-TV movie starring Shiri Appleby) - Nov. 5

A Snow Globe Christmas (2013 made-for-TV movie starring Christina Milian) - Nov. 7

TBS

The Elf on the Shelf: An Elf’s Story (2011 animated special) - Nov. 23

24 Hours of A Christmas Story (annual tradition of 12 back-to-back airings of the 1983 Christmas classic) - Dec. 24-25

VH1

Scrooged (1988 movie starring Bill Murray) - Nov. 30

BBC America

Happy Feet (2006 animated movie) - Nov. 29

UP TV

Gilmore the Merrier (epic marathon of all 7 seasons of the Gilmore Girls hosted by Scott Patterson) - Nov. 24-Dec. 1 (Preview)

INSP

The Waltons: The Thanksgiving Story (1973 special episode of the series) - Nov. 28

Christmas in the Smokies (2015 made-for-TV movie starring Sarah Lancaster) - Dec. 1

The Waltons: The Best Christmas (1976 special episode of the series) - Dec. 5

Daniel Boone: A Christmas Story (1965 special episode of the series) - Dec. 7

The Homecoming: A Christmas Story (1971 made-for-TV movie that introduced The Waltons) - Dec. 9

The Waltons: The Spirit (1979 special episode of the series) - Dec. 23

Christmas on the Coast (2017 movie starring Julie Ann Emery) - Dec. 24 (Twitter, Trailer)

The Waltons: The Children’s Carol (1977 movie-length episode of the series) - Dec. 25

Bravo

A Madea Christmas (2013 Tyler Perry movie) - Oct. 3

Ovation

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (2001 made-for-TV movie starring Connie Selleca) - Dec. 12

Murdoch Mysteries: A Merry Murdoch Christmas (2015 holiday special episode of the series) - Dec. 18

Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries: Murder Under the Mistletoe (2013 holiday special episode of the series) - Dec. 24

The Greatest Story Ever Told (1965 film starring Charlton Heston) - Dec. 25

Paramount Network

Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987 movie starring John Candy and ?Steve Martin) - Nov. 17

Comedy Central

Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987 movie starring John Candy and ?Steve Martin) - Nov. 28

The Office Christmas Party (marathon of all the The Office’s holiday episodes) - Dec. 24

POP

Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001 movie starring Rene Zellweger) - Nov. 1

BETHer

Last Holiday (2006 movie starring Queen Latifah) - Oct. 30

Aspire

The Perfect Holiday (2007 movie starring Gabrielle Union) - Oct. 27

TCM

The Man Who Came to Dinner (1942 movie classic starring Bette Davis) - Nov. 19

Little Women (1949 movie classic starring June Allyson) - Dec. 1

Fanny & Alexander (1982 Ingmar Bergman classic) - Dec. 3, also On Demand

It Happened on 5th Avenue (1947 movie classic starring Victor Moore) - Dec. 8

3 Godfathers (1948 movie classic starring John Wayne) - Dec. 8

The Holly and the Ivy (1952 movie classic) - Dec. 8

Holiday Affair (1949 movie classic starring Robert Mitchum) - Dec. 15

Remember The Night (1940 movie classic starring Barbara Stanwyck and Fred MacMurray) - Dec. 15

In the Good Old Summertime (1949 movie classic, a remake of The Shop Around the Corner, starring Judy Garland) - Dec. 23

Bundle of Joy (1956 movie classic starring Debbie Reynolds and Eddie Fisher) - Dec. 23

Meet Me in St. Louis (1944 movie classic starring Judy Garland) - Dec. 24

All Mine to Give (1957 movie classic starring Glynis Johns) - Dec. 24

The Bishop’s Wife (1947 movie classic starring Cary Grant) - Dec. 24

Meet John Doe (1941 movie classic directed by Frank Capra) - Dec. 24

The Shop Around the Corner (1940 movie classic starring Jimmy Stewart) - Dec. 25

Susan Slept Here (1954 movie classic starring Debbie Reynolds) - Dec. 25

Love Finds Andy Hardy (1938 movie classic starring Mickey Rooney) - Dec. 25

Disney Channel

Good Luck Charlie, It’s Christmas (2011 Disney channel movie) - Dec. 1

Duck the Halls: A Mickey Mouse Christmas Special (2016 animated special) - Dec. 6

TV One

Turkel Marathon (three-day Family Matters marathon ) - Nov. 27-30 (Teaser)

Get TV

Perry Como’s Early American Christmas (1978 TV special) - Nov. 17

Perry Como’s Christmas in the Holy Land (1980 TV special) - Nov. 17

Perry Como’s Christmas in Austria (1976 TV special) - Nov. 17

The Secret of Giving (1999 made-for-TV movie starring Reba McEntire) - Nov. 24

A Song for the Season (1999 made-for-TV movie starring Naomi Judd and Andy Griffith) - Nov. 24

Johnny Cash Christmas ‘83 (1983 TV special) - Nov. 24

24 Hour Bing Crosby Black Friday White Christmas (Crosby movie and holiday special marathon) - Nov. 29

The Homecoming: A Christmas Story (1971 made-for-TV movie that introduced The Waltons) - Dec. 1

Papa’s Angels (2000 made-for-tv movie starring Scott Bakula) - Dec. 7

Comfort and Joy (2003 made-for-TV movie starring Nancy McKeon) - Dec. 7

A Town Without Christmas (2001 made-for-TV movie starring Patricia Heaton) - Dec. 7

Finding John Christmas (2003 made-for-TV movie starring Valeri Bertinelli) - Dec. 7

When Angels Come to Town (2004 made-for-TV movie starring Peter Falk) - Dec. 7

Yes Virginia, There is a Santa Claus (1991 movie starring Richard Thomas, Ed Asner and Charles Bronson) - Dec. 8

Ms. Scrooge (1997 made-for-TV movie starring Cicely Tyson) - Dec. 8

The Soul and Spirit of Christmas (2018 original music special featuring CeCe Winans, BeBe Winans, Koryn Hawthorn and Take 6) - Dec. 17

Father Knows Best: Home for Christmas (1977 movie based on the classic 1950s series) - Dec. 21

MeTV

A Very Brady Christmas (1988 TV movie based on the classic 1970s series) - available now

Showtime

Second Act (2018 movie starring Jennifer Lopez and Vanessa Hudgens) - Nov. 7

Everybody’s Fine (2007 movie starring Robert De Niro) - Nov. 7

The Man Who Invented Christmas (2017 movie starring Dan Stevens) - Nov. 12

You Better Watch Out (1981 holiday horror movie) - Nov. 13

A Bad Moms Christmas (2017 movie starring Mils Kunis and Kristen Bell) - Nov. 25

Christmas Evil (1980 horror movie) - available now, on demand

HBO

The Search for Santa Paws (2010 Disney movie) - Oct. 29, HBO Family

Love, Actually (2003 movie starring Hugh Grant and Emma Thompson) - Oct. 29, HBO Comedy

Snow Buddies (2008 Disney movie) - Nov. 2, HBO Family

Shazam (2019 DC superhero movie starring Zachary Levi) - Dec. 5, HBO

Cinemax

Jingle All the Way (1996 movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger) - Oct. 28, ActionMax

The Family Stone (1996 movie starring Sarah Jessica Parker) - Oct. 28, 5StarMax

Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001 movie staring Rene Zellweger) - Oct. 31, 5StarMax

Starz

A Christmas Carol (2006 animated movie) - available now, on demand

Inspector Gadget Saves Christmas (1992 animated special) - available now, on demand

Scrooged (1988 movie starring Bill Murray) - available now, on demand

Serendipity (2001 movie starring John Cusack) - Oct. 29, Starz Comedy

Silent Night (2012 horror film) - Oct. 31

Saving Santa (2013 animated movie) - Nov. 5

Epix

A Cadaver Christmas (2011 horror movie) - available now, on demand

Christmas Bunny (2010 movie starring Florence Henderson) - available now, on demand

Christmas in Hollywood (2014 children’s film, a Chinese co-production) - available now, on demand

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964 camp classic) - available now, on demand

Saving Christmas (2014 film created by Kirk Cameron dubbed the “worst movie of all time”) - available now, on demand

Santa and Three Bears (1970 animated special) - available now, on demand

A Very Wompkee Christmas (2003 animated special) - available now, on demand

Netflix

48 Christmas Wishes (2017 movie starring Liam MacDonald and Clara Kushnir) (Trailer)

Abominable Christmas (2012 animated special) - available now

Aggretsuko: We Wish You a Metal Christmas (2018 original anime special) - available now (Trailer)

Angela’s Christmas (2018 animated special based on the children’s book by Frank McCourt) - available now (Trailer) **Review**

Angels in the Snow (2015 made-for-TV movie starring Kristy Swanson) - available now

Arthur Christmas (2011 animated movie) - Jan. 1, 2020

A Bad Moms Christmas (2017 movie starring Mils Kunis and Kristen Bell) - available now

Benji’s Very Own Christmas Story! (1978 TV special) - available now

Black Mirror: White Christmas (2014 episode of the dystopian tech series) - available now

Bob’s Broken Sleigh (2015 animated special) - available now

Bojack Horseman: Christmas Special (2014 original special) - available now

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina: A Midwinter’s Tale (2018 original special holiday stand-alone episode of the series) - available now (Trailer)

Christmas Break-In (2018 movie starring Denise Richards and Danny Glover) - Nov. 1

The Christmas Chronicles (2018 original Netflix movie produced by Chris Columbus, starring Kurt Russell, Kimberly Williams-Paisley and Judah Lewis) -available now (Trailer) ***Review***

Christmas Cracker (2015 British documentary about those obsessed with the holiday) - available now

Christmas Inheritance (2017 original Netflix movie, starring Eliza Taylor) - available now

Christmas in the Heartland (2017 movie starring Sierra McCormick) - available now

A Christmas Prince (2017 original Netflix movie, starring Rose McInver) - available now

A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding (2018 original Netflix movie; wedding-themed sequel to 2017′s A Christmas Prince, starring Ben Lamb and Rose McIver) - available now (Trailer)

A Christmas Special: Miraculous Tale of Ladybug & Cat Noir (2016 animated special) - available now

Christmas with the Kranks (2004 movie starring Tim Allen) - available now

El Camino Christmas (2017 original Netflix movie starring Jessica Alba and Tim Allen) - available now

Elliot: The Littlest Reindeer (2018 animated movie starring Josh Hutcherson) - Nov. 1 (Trailer, Twitter) ****Review****

Free Rein: The Twelve Neighs of Christmas (2018 original special of the series) - available now

Get Santa (2014 British Christmas movie starring Warwick Davis and Jim Broadbent) - available now

George Balanchine’s The Nutcracker (1993 New York City ballet production, narrated by Kevin Kline) - available now

Great British Baking Show: Holidays (2016 Christmas special of The Great British Bake Off) - available now ***Review***

Gremlins (1984 movie directed by Steven Spielberg) - May 1

The Grinch (2018 animated movie starring Benedict Cumberbatch as the Grinch) - June 5 (Trailer, Trailer 2,Trailer 3)

The Holiday Calendar (2018 original Netflix movie starring Kat Graham, Quincy Brown and Ron Cephas Jones) - available now (Trailer) **Review**

Holly Star (2018 movie written, directed and starring Michael Nickles) - Nov. 1 (Trailer)

A Holiday Engagement (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Bonnie Somerville and Shelley Long) - available now

Home for the Holidays (2017 animated special based on the Dreamworks movie characters from Home) - available now

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000 live action film, starring Jim Carrey) - available now

Just Friends (2005 holiday-com starring Ryan Reynolds and Amy Smart) - May 1

Kung Fu Panda Holiday (2010 animated special) - available now

Lez Bomb (2018 movie starring Jenna Laurenzo) - available now

Mariah Carey’s Merriest Christmas (2015 musical special) - available now

The Magic Snowflake (2013 animated movie) - available now

Merry Madagascar (2009 animated special; packaged with other Dreamworks holiday shorts as “DreamWorks Holiday Classics”, also listed as Happy Holidays from Madagascar) - available now

Mickey’s Magical Christmas: Snowed In at the House of Mickey Mouse (2001 animated Christmas compilation) - available now

Mickey’s Once Upon a Christmas (1999 animated compilation) - available now

Mickey’s Twice Upon a Christmas (2004 animated compilation) - available now

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic “Best Gift Ever�� (2018 animated special) - available now (Trailer)

Nailed It! Holiday! (2018 original holiday baking-themed special episodes of the series) - available now (Trailer) *Review*

Natale A Cinque Stelle (a.k.a. Five Star Christmas; Italian Christmas comedy starring Massimo Gini) - available now (Trailer)

Neo Yokio Pink Christmas (2018 Netflix original animated special starring Jaden Smith and Jamie Foxx) - available now (Trailer)

The Night of the Meek (1954 class Christmas Twilight Zone episode; season 2, episode 11) - available now

Nutcracker and the Four Realms (2018 Disney movie starring Keira Knightly, Morgan Freeman, Helen Mirren and Mackenzie Foy) - May 28 (Trailer)

OddBods: The Festive Menace (2018 animated special) - available now

Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009 Black Friday movie starring Kevin James) - available now

Pee Wee’s Playhouse Christmas Special (1988 special) - available now

Pottersville (2017 movie starring Michael Shannon, Judy Greer and Christina Hendricks) - available now

Prince of Peoria: A Christmas Moose Miracle (2018 original special) - available now

The Princess Switch (2018 Netflix original holiday movie starring Vanessa Hudgens and Sam Palladino) - available now (Trailer) ***Review***

Puppy Star Christmas (2018 children’s holiday film in the continuing Pup Stars franchise) - available now (Trailer)

Reindeer Games (2000 action movie starring Ben Affleck) - available now

Santa Buddies (2009 Disney movie) - available now

Santa Pac’s Merry Berry Day (2016 animated special) - available now

Santa Paws 2: The Santa Pups (2012 Disney movie) - available now

Santa’s Apprentice (2010 animated movie) - available now

The Spirit of Christmas (2015 made-for-TV movie) - available now

The Star (2017 animated film telling of the Christmas story from the animal’s perspective) - available now

Stick Man (2015 BBC animated special; starring Martin Freeman, based on the book by Julia Donaldson) - available now

A Storybots Christmas (2017 animated special, starring Judy Greer and Ed Asner) - available now

Super Monsters and the Wish Star (2018 original animated special based on the series) - available now

Tree Man (2015 documentary) - available now

Trailer Park Boys: Xmas Special (2004 special) - available now

Trolls Holiday - (2017 holiday special starring Anna Kendrick, Justin Timberlake and Zooey Deschanel, featuring characters from the Dreamworks feature film) - available now

A Very Murray Christmas (2015 Netflix variety special starring Bill Murray) - available now

White Christmas (1954 movie classic starring Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye and Rosemary Clooney) - available now

Hulu

Albert (2016 animated special) - available now

Angels in the Snow (2015 made-for-TV movie starring Kristy Swanson) - available now

Anna and the Apocolypse (2018 holiday horror-comedy starring Ella Hunt) - Nov. 13 (Trailer, Trailer 2, Redband UK Trailer)

Bad Santa (2003 movie starring Billy Bob Thornton) - July 1

Back to Christmas (2014 made-for-TV movie) - available now

Barbie: A Perfect Christmas (2011 animated special) - available now

Barbie in a Christmas Carol (2008 animated special) - available now

Barney: Night Before Christmas (1998 special) - available now

Barney A Very Merry Christmas: The Movie (2011 movie) - available now

Barney: Christmas Star (2002 special) - available now

Ben is Back (2018 holiday-set drama starring Julia Roberts) - available now

Bob the Builder: Christmas to Remember (2001 animated special) - available now

Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001 movie starring Rene Zellweger) - available now

Chasing Christmas (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Tom Arnold) - available now

Christmas in Wonderland (2007 made-for-TV movie starring Patrick Swayze) - available now

Christmas Perfection (2018 made-for-TV movie starring Caitlin Thompson, James Henri-Thomas and Robbie Silverman) - available now

Crazy for Christmas (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Howard Hesseman) - available now

Curious George: A Very Monkey Christmas (2009 animated movie) - available now

Daddy’s Home 2 (2017 holiday comedy starring Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell) - available now

Dear Santa (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Amy Acker) - available now

Decorating Disney: Holiday Magic (2017 special) - available now

Deck the Halls (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Gabrielle Carteris) - available now

Disney Fairy Tale Weddings: Holiday Magic (2017 special) - available now

Drinksgiving (2017 movie starring Pamela Mitchell) - available now

Eve’s Christmas (2004 made-for-TV movie starring Elisa Donovan) - Dec. 1

Every Other Holiday (2018 made-for-TV movie starring Schulyer Fisk, David Clayton Rogers, Dee Wallace and Abby James Witherspoon) - available now ****Review****

A Fairly Odd Christmas (2012 made-for-TV movie starring Drake Bell; one in a series of live-action adaptations of the animated series The Fairly OddParents) - Nov. 1

Flesh and Blood (2018 Hulu original holiday horror movie) - available now

A Frozen Christmas 3: Party Time (2018 animated movie) - available now

Giada’s Holiday Handbook (seasons 1-3 of the Food Network series) - Nov. 1

The Great American Baking Show: Holiday Edition (season 4 of the limited-run series) - available now

The Great Christmas Light Fight (season 6 of the limited-run reality competition featuring outrageous holiday displays judged by Carter Oosterhouse and Taniya Nayak) - available now

Happy New Year Charlie Brown (1986 animated special) - available now

Holiday Baking Championship (seasons 1-4 of the Food Network series) - Nov. 1

A Holiday Engagement (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Bonnie Somerville and Shelley Long) - available now

Holiday in Handcuffs (2007 made-for-TV movie starring Melissa Joan Hart and Mario Lopez) - available now

Home by Christmas (2006 made-for-TV movie starring Linda Hamilton)

Home for the Holidays (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Sean Young) - available now

Ice Age: A Mammoth Christmas (2011 animated special based on the Ice Age movie series) - Nov. 24

Instant Family (2018 movie starring Mark Wahlberg) - Nov. 14 (Trailer)

I Want a Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown (2003 animated special) - available now

Jingle Bell Rocks (2014 non-traditional Christmas music documentary) - available now

Kirk Cameron’s Saving Christmas (2014 film dubbed the “worst movie of all time”) - available now

March of the Penguins 2: The Next Step (2018 documentary sequel) - available now

Midnighters (2017 New Year’s-set movie thriller) - available now

My Dad is Scrooge (2014 family movie) - available now

My Little Pony: A Very Minty Christmas (2005 animated special) - available now

My Santa (2013 made-for-TV movie starring Samaire Armstrong) - available now

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (1989 movie starring Chevy Chase) - available now

New Year, New You (2018 Hulu original holiday horror movie) - available now

NOS4A2 (season one of the AMC Christmas-obssesed vampire series, based on the book by Joe Hill) - Nov. 26

No Sleep ‘Til Christmas (2018 made-for-TVmovie starring Dave and Odette Annable) - available now (Trailer) Review

The Oath (2018 movie starring Ike Barinholtz, Tiffany Haddish, John Cho and Nora Dunn) - available now (Trailer)

OddBods: The Festive Menace (2018 animated special) - available now

Pixi Saves Christmas (2018 animated special) - available now

Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987 movie starring John Candy and Steve Martin) - July 1

The Polar Express (2004 animated movie starring Tom Hanks) - July 1

Pooka (2018 Hulu original holiday horror movie) - available now

Prancer (1989 movie starring Sam Elliott) - Dec. 1

Rare Exports: A Christmas tale (2010 holiday horror movie) - available now

Santa Baby 2: Christmas Maybe (2009 made-for-TV movie sequel starring Jennie McCarthy) - available now

Santa Hunters (2014 made-for-TV family movie starring Benjamin Flores Jr. and Breanna Yde) - available now

Saving Christmas (2017 movie starring Ed Asner, Brooke Langton and Patrick Muldoorn) - Sep 1 (Trailer)

The Secret of the Nutcracker (2007 movie starring Brian Cox and Tom Carey) - available now

Snow (2004 made-for-TV movie starring Tom Cavanagh) - available now

Snow 2: Brain Freeze (2008 made-for-TV movie sequel starring Tom Cavanagh) - available now

The Spirit of Christmas (2015 made-for-TV movie) - available now

So This Is Christmas (2013 movie starring Vivica A. Fox) - available now

The Swan Princess Christmas (2012 animated movie) - available now

Terrific Trucks Save Christmas (2016 animated movie) - available now

Tiny Christmas (2017 made-for-TV family movie starring Riele Downs and Lizzy Greene) - available now

The Truth About Christmas (2018 made-for-TV movie starring Kali Hawk) - available now (Trailer) ****Review****

A Very Brady Christmas (1988 TV movie based on the classic 1970s series) - available now

A Very Terry Christmas: Get Cozy with Terry Crews (2018 special) - available now

The Wiggles, Go Santa Go ( 2013 musical special) - available now

Amazon Prime

12 Days of Christmas Eve (2004 made-for-TV Christmas movie starring Steven Weber and Molly Shannon) - available now

Abbott & Costello Christmas Show (1955 Christmas special) - available now

All I Want For Christmas is You (original animated movie based on the 2015 children’s book of the same title; featuring Mariah Carey) - available now (Trailer) Review

All is Bright (2013 dark holiday comedy starring Paul Rudd and Paul Giamatti) - available now

An All Dogs Christmas Carol (1998 animated movie) - available now

An American Christmas Carol (1979 made-for-TV movie starring Henry Winkler) - available now

An American Girl Story, Maryellen 1955: Extraordinary Christmas (2016 original movie) - available now

An Angel for Christmas (1995 animated special) - available now

Anna and the Apocolypse (2018 holiday horror-comedy starring Ella Hunt) - Nov. 13 (Trailer, Trailer 2, Redband UK Trailer)

The Apartment (1960 Billy Wilder classic starring Jack Lemmon and Shirley MacLaine) - available now

Arthur’s Perfect Christmas (2011 animated special) - available now

Babes in Toyland (1986 movie starring Keanu Reeves and Drew Barrymore) - available now

Babes in Toyland (1961 Disney movie starring Annette Funicello) - available now

Babes in Toyland (1997 animated movie) - available now

Bad Santa (2003 movie starring Billy Bob Thornton) - Nov. 1

Believe: The True Story of Real Bearded Santas (2017 documentary of real-bearded Santas) - available now

Best Thanksgiving Ever (2018 movie starring Eric Roberts) - available now

The Beverly Hillbillies Christmas Adventure (new compilation of 1963 holiday episode of the series) - available now

Beyond Christmas (1940 colorized movie classic starring Harry Carey) - available now

Black Christmas (1974 slasher film) - available now

Blizzard (2004 live-action kids movie directed by Le Var Burton) - available now

Bob Hope Christmas Special (1968 variety special) - available now

Box Office Bargain Bin Presents: A Christmas Carol (2018 special featuring movie commentary from “Bo McGraw”) - available now

Brat Holiday Spectacular (2019 family movie) - available now (Trailer)

Brer Rabbit’s Christmas Carol (1992 animated special) - available now

Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001 movie starring Rene Zellweger) - available now

A Bush Christmas (1983 movie starring Nicole Kidman) - available now

A Cadaver Christmas (2011 holiday horror comedy) - Aug 31

Charles Dickens: A Christmas Carol (1982 animated movie) - available now

Charles Dickens' The Christmas Carol (1949 tv special narrated by Vincent Price) - available now

Chasing Christmas (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Tom Arnold) - available now

A Child’s Christmas (2008 British animated special, narrated by Matthew Rhys) - available now

A Child’s Christmas in Wales (1987 movie starring Denholm Elliott) - available now

A Christian Carol (2017 movie puts faith-based spin on Dickens) - available now

Christmas, Again (2014 movie written and directed by Charles Poekel) - available now

Christmas Bunny (2010 movie starring Florence Henderson) - available now

Christmas at Maxwell’s (2006 faith-based movie starring Andrew May) - TBA

A Christmas Carol (1951 movie classic starring Alastair Sim) - available now

A Christmas Carol (1954 TV version originally aired as part of Shower of Stars, starring Fredric March) - available now

A Christmas Carol (1969 animated special, originally aired on NBC) - available now

A Christmas Carol (1971 animated movie starring Alastair Sim) - available now

A Christmas Carol (2016 Australian musical version aimed at kids) - available now

Christmas Cartoons (14 Christmas shorts from Fleischer Studios/Famous studios 1930s-40s collection) - available now

Christmas Cartoon Wonderland (collection of 1930s-40s cartoons) - available now

Christmas Child (2004 movie based on the Max Lucado story) - available now

Christmas Comes But Once a Year (1936 animated short) - available now

The Christmas Dragon (2015 animated movie) - available now

Christmas Dreams (2017 children’s movie narrated by Kevin Sorbo) - available now

Christmas in Car City (2017 holiday series of preschool animated shorts from Amuse Entertainment) - available now

A Christmas in New York (2017 Nathan Ives movie) - available now

Christmas in New York (2005 animated special) - available now

Christmas in Hollywood (2014 children’s film, a Chinese co-production) - available now

Christmas in Wonderland (2007 made-for-TV movie starring Patrick Swayze) - available now

Christmas is Here Again (2007 animated movie) - available now

Christmas Lilies of the Field (1979 made-for-TV sequel starring Billy Dee Williams) - available now

Christmas Miracles (2017 Richard Thomas and Nia Peeples-hosted series featuring holiday stories of hope) - available now

A Christmas Snow (2010 movie starring Catherine Mary Stewart) - available now

Christmas Story (2008 movie starring Jon Turturro and Noah Emmerich) - available now

A Christmas Story Documentary: Road Trip For Ralphie (2008 documentary about the classic Christmas film) - available now

The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t (1966 Italian movie, avant garde take on A Christmas Carol) - available now

The Christmas Toy (1986 Jim Henson special) - available now

Christmas Wander (2017 faith-based holiday movie written/directed by Micah Caronna) - available now

The Christmas Wife (1988 made-for-TV movie starring Jason Robards) - available now

Christmas with Lorne Greene (1966 special) - available now

Christmas with the King Family (1967 holiday special) - available now

A Christmas Without Snow (1980 made-for-TV movie starring John Houseman and Michael Learned) - available now

Christopher and Holly: The Bears Who Saved Christmas (1994 animated special) - available now

Click, Clack, Moo: Christmas at the Farm (2017 original animated special) - available now

Coopers’ Christmas (2010 movie starring Dave Foley) - available now

The Cowboy & The Indians: A Gene Autry Christmas Western (1949 movie) - available now

Crazy for Christmas (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Howard Hesseman) - available now

Daddy’s Home 2 (2017 holiday comedy starring Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell) - available now

Date with the Angels: Santa’s Helper (1957 special starring Betty White) - available now

Dear Santa (2006 special hosted by Kristen Bell, with celebs answering kids’ “Dear Santa” letters) - available now

Deck the Halls (1994 Reynolds-Harris animated special) - available now

Deck the Halls (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Gabrielle Carteris) - available now

Disney’s A Christmas Carol (2009 animated movie starring Jim Carrey) - available Dec. 5

Dot & Spot’s Magical Christmas Adventure (1996 animated special) - available now

The Elf Who Didn’t Believe (1996 family movie) - available now

Emmet Otter’s Jug-Band Christmas (1977 Jim Henson special) - available now

Ex-Mas Eve (2006 independent holiday rom-com) - available now

Fall City (2018 movie starring Dashiell Wolf) - available now

Fanny, Annie & Danny (2010 Christmas movie) - available now

Franklin’s Magic Christmas (2001 animated special) - available now

G.E. Theatre Christmas Show: A Child is Born (1956 special hosted by Ronald Regan) - available now

Getting to the Nutcracker (2014 ballet documentary) - available now

The Great Rupert a.k.a. A Christmas Wish (1950 movie starring Jimmy Durante) - available now

The Gruffalo (2009 animated special) - available now

The Gruffalo’s Child (2011 animated special) - available now

Gumby’s Christmas Capers (2014 animated special) - available now

Happy! (2017 holiday-set sci-fi series starring Christopher Meloni) - available now

Holiday Engagement (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Bonnie Somerville and Shelley Long) - available now

Holiday Heart (2000 movie starring Ving Rhames and Alfre Woodard) - available now

Holiday Inn (1941 Irving Berlin classic starring Bing Crosby) - available now

Home for Christmas (1990 made-for-TV movie starring Mickey Rooney) - available now

Home for the Holidays (1995 movie starring Hollie Hunter and Robert Downey Jr.) - available now

Home for the Holidays (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Sean Young) - available now

I Am Santa Claus (2014 Mick Foley documentary) - available now

I Believe in Santa Claus (1984 French children’s movie, dubbed in English) - available now

If You Give a Mouse a Christmas Cookie (2016 animated special) - available now

Instant Family (2018 movie starring Mark Wahlberg) - Nov. 14 (Trailer)

It Happened One Christmas (1977 movie starring Marlo Thomas) - available now

It’s a Wonderful Life (Frank Capra’s 1946 classic starring Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed) - available now

The Jack Benny Show: Jack Benny Does Christmas Shopping (1954 classic) - available now

Jack Frost (1979 Rankin-Bass animated special) - available now

Jingle All the Way (1996 movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger) - Dec. 5

Jingle Bell Rap (1991 Reynolds-Harris animated special) - available now

Johann’s Gift to Christmas (1991claymation and live action special, based on the 1972 children’s book) - available now

Juggler of Notre Dame (1983 faith-based, made-for-TV movie) - available now

Jolly Old St. Nicholas (1994 Reynolds-Harris animated special) - available now

Just Getting Started (2017 movie starring Morgan Freeman and Rene Russo) - available now

Larry’s Tree: A Christmas Journey to the White House (2018 documentary about the White House tree) - available now

The Legends of Santa (2012 documentary) - available now

Let’s Go: Christmas the Movie 2 (2018 low-budget sequel) - available now

The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus (1976 Rankin-Bass animated special) - available now

The Little Christmas Burro (1977 animated special available as part of “Christmas Classics Vol. 2″) - available now

The Little Crooked Christmas Tree (1990 animated special, based on the book and narrated by Christopher Plummer) - available now

Lost Christmas (2014 movie starring Eddie Izzard) - available now

The Lost Season (2004 animated special) - available now

Lovely, Still (2010 movie starring Martin Landau, Elizabeth Banks and Ellen Bustyn) - available now

The Magic Christmas Tree (1964 fantasy movie) - available now

Magic Gift of the Snowman (2003 animated special) - available now

March of the Wooden Soliders (a.k.a. Babes in Toyland, colorized version of the 1934 Laurel and Hardy movie) - available now

The Man Who Invented Christmas (2017 movie starring Dan Stevens) - available now

Meet John Doe (1941 classic directed by Frank Capra) - available now

The Merry Gentlemen (2009 movie starring Michael Keaton) - available now

A Merry Mirthworm Christmas (1984 Reynolds-Harris animated special) - available now

Merry Christmas from Funny or Die (2010 special featuring Ryan Gosling and Will Ferrell) - available now

A Merry Friggin’ Christmas (2014 movie starring Robin Williams) - available now

Miracle at Sage Creek (2005 Western holiday film starring David Carradine and Wes Studi) - available now

A Miracle on Christmas Lake (2016 made-for-TV movie) - available now

The Miracle on 34th Street (2006 made-for-TV version of the movie classic) - available now

Mister Scrooge To See You (2013 movie that imagines what happened after A Christmas Carol) - available now

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year (2008 made-for-TV movie starring Henry Winkler) - available now

Mother Krampus (2017 horror movie) - available now

Mr. Bill’s Christmas Special (1994 Canadian special) - available now

MST3K: Santa Claus (1993 episode of the bad movie mocking series) - available now

New Year’s Day (1989 movie starring David Duchovny) - available now

Noel (2006 movie starring Susan Sarandon and Penelope Cruz) - available now

Nick and Noel (1993 animated special) - available now

The Night Before Christmas (2016 animated special) - available now

Night of the Comet (1984 holiday horror camp classic) - available now

The Night of the Meek (1954 class Christmas Twilight Zone episode; season 2, episode 11) - available now

Nutcracker: The Motion Picture (1986 movie starring Wade Walthall) - available now

Noelle (2018 movie starring Luiz Baille and Sean Patrick Brennan) - available now

O Christmas Tree (1994 Reynolds-Harris animated special) - available now

O’Christmas Tree (1999 animated special starring Ed Asner) - available now

Oddbods: The Festive Menance (2017 animated special) - available now

Operation Christmas List (2016 comedy) - available now

On Valentine’s Day (1986 movie, part 2 of the Horton Foote trilogy The Story of a Marriage, which originally aired on PBS; Despite the title Christmas is integral to this section of the story)

Pete the Cat: A Groovy New Year (2017 animated special) - available now

Pete’s Christmas (2013 made-for-TV Christmas movie starring Bailee Madison) - available now

Pieces of April (2003 Thanksgiving movie starring Katie Holmes) - available now

A Pondemonium Christmas (2011 animated special) - available now

Red Skelton Christmas Classics (1955 variety specials highlights) - available now

Rosemont (a.k.a. A Rosemont Christmas; 2015 movie starring Michael Gross, Brad Dourif and Grace Zabriskie) - available now

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (1948 animated short) - available now

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964 camp classic) - available now

Santa Claus Wears a Gun (1956 special starring Annie Oakley) - available now

Santa and the Fairy Snow Queen (1951 Sid Davis live-action short) - available now

Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny (1972 cult classic fantasy film) available now

Santa and Pete (1999 made-for-TV movie starring James Earl Jones and Hume Cronyn) - available now

Santa and Three Bears (1970 animated special) - available now

Santa Claus vs the Devil (a.k.a. Santa Claus, 1959 Mexican fantasy movie) - available now

The Santa Suicides (2018 UK horror-comedy) - available now

Scrooge (1935 movie classic starring Seymour Hicks; colorized version also listed as “A Christmas Carol in Color!”) - available now

Scrooge (1970 movie classic musical movie classic starring Albert Finney) - available now

Shelved (2016 holiday horror movie directed by Michael E Cullen III) - available now

Silent Night, Bloody Night (2014 French horror movie) - available now

Some of My Best Friends Are (1970 movie starring Fannie Flagg) - available now

The Snowy Day (2016 original animated special, based on the classic children’s book) - available now

The Snowman (1982 animated special based on classic children’s picture book) - available now

The Snowman and the Snowdog (2014 animated special sequel to The Snowman) - available now

Snow Queen (2002 series based on the fairy tale, starring Bridget Fonda) - available now

Snow Queen (2013 animated movie) - available now

Solstice (1993 movie starring Mike Kelly) - Nov. 27

Some Girls (1988 comedy starring Patrick Dempsey and Jennifer Connelly) - available now

Something for Nothing (1999 animated special based on a Jewish folk tale) - available now

Stick Man (2015 BBC animated special; starring Martin Freeman, based on the book by Julia Donaldson) - available now

Stuck in Love (2012 Thanksgiving movie starring Greg Kinnear and Jennifer Connelly) - available now

Switchmas (a.k.a. Ira Finkelstein's Christmas or All I Want Is Christmas; 2012 movie starring Elliot Gould) - available now

Thanksgiving (2015 movie starring Matthew Chastain) - available now

A Thanksgiving Tale (1983 puppet special from the producers of Alf) - available now

The Ugly Duckling’s Christmas Wish (1996 Reynolds-Harris animated movie) - available now

Unlikely Angel (1996 made-for-TV movie starring Dolly Parton) - available now

Up on the Housetop (1992 Reynolds-Harris animated special) - available now

A Very Merry Cricket (1973 animated special) - available now

We Wish You A Merry Christmas (1994 animated special) - available now

Who (2018 Indian sci-fi movie set on Christmas) - available now

Yes, Virginia (2009 animated special) - available now

Yes Virginia, There Is a Santa Claus (1991 made-for-TV movie starring Richard Thomas, Ed Asner and Charles Bronson) - available now

The Yummy Gummy Search for Santa (2012 animated special) - available now

Disney+

12 Dates of Christmas (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Amy Smart) - available Nov. 12

Babes in Toyland (1961 movie starring Annette Funicello) - available Nov. 12

Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas (1997 direct-to-DVD animated sequel) - Nov. 12

The Christmas Star (1986 movie starring Ed Asner) - available Nov. 12

Decorating Disney: Holiday Magic (2017 TV special about decorating Disney parks - available Nov. 12

Disney’s A Christmas Carol (2009 animated movie starring Jim Carrey) - available Nov. 12

Doug’s Secret Christmas (1996 holiday special episode of the series) -available now

Ducktales: Last Christmas (2018 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

Frozen (2013 Disney animated movie) - available Nov. 12

Good Luck Charlie, It’s Christmas (2011 Disney channel movie) - available Nov. 12

Home Alone (1990 comedy starring Macaulay Culkin) - available Nov. 12

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992 comedy starring Macaulay Culkin) - available Nov. 12

I’ll Be Home for Christmas (1998 movie starring Jonathan Taylor Thomas) - available Nov. 12

Iron Man 3 (2013 movie starring Robert Downey, Jr.) - available Nov. 12

The Kids’ Hospital at Christmas (2014 UK series) - available now

Mickey’s Once Upon a Christmas (1999 animated compilation) - available Nov. 12

Mickey and the Roadster Racers: Hot Diggity Holiday (2017 animated special) - available Nov. 12

Mickey and the Roadster Racers: Happy Holiday Helpers (2017 animated special) - available Nov. 12

Mickey’s Twice Upon a Christmas (2004 animated compilation) - available Nov. 12

Millions (2004 movie written and directed by Danny Boyle) - available Nov. 12

Miracle on 34th Street (1947 holiday classic starring Natalie Wood) - available Nov. 12

The Mistle-Tones (2012 made-for-TV movie starring Tori Spelling and Tia Mowry-Hardrict) - available Nov. 12

The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992 movie starring Michael Caine) - avialable Nov. 12

The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993 stop-animate movie) - available Nov. 12

Nutcracker and the Four Realms (2018 Disney movie starring Keira Knightly) - available now (Trailer)

Olaf’s Frozen Adventure (2017 special based on the characters from Disney’s Frozen) - available now

One Magic Christmas (1985 movie starring Mary Steenburgen) - available Nov. 12

Pluto’s Christmas Tree (1952 animated short) - available now

Phineas & Ferb’s Christmas Vacation (2009 Disney Channel animated special) - available Nov. 12

Richie Rich’s Christmas Wish (1998 movie starring Eugene Levy) -available Nov. 12

Santa Buddies: The Legend of Santa Paws (2009 Disney movie) - available now

The Santa Clause (1994 movie starring Tim Allen) - available Nov. 12

The Santa Clause 2 (2002 sequel starring Tim Allen) - available Nov. 12

Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (2006 sequel starring Tim Allen and Martin Short) - available Nov. 12

Santa Paws 2: The Santa Pups (2012 Disney movie) - available Nov. 12

The Search for Santa Paws (2010 Disney movie) - available now

The Snowball Express (1972 movie starring Dean Jones) - available Nov. 12

Snow Dogs (2002 movie starring Cuba Gooding Jr.) - available Nov. 12

Snowglobe (2007 made-for-TV movie starring Christina Milian) - available Nov. 12

Three Days (2001 made-for-TV movie starring Kristin Davis and Reed Diamond) - available Nov. 12

‘Twas the Night (2001 Disney Channel movie starring Bryan Cranston) - Nov. 12

The Ultimate Christmas Present (2000 Disney Channel movie) - available Nov. 12

Unaccompanied Minors (2006 family movie staring Lewis Black) - Dec. 1

Victorian Farm: Christmas Special (2009 UK holiday special) - available now

While You Were Sleeping (1995 movie starring Sandra Bullock) - available Nov. 12

Winnie the Pooh: A Very Merry Pooh Year (2002 direct-to-DVD animated movie) - available Nov. 12

Britbox

Black Adder’s Christmas Carol (1988 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

A Child’s Christmas in Wales (1987 movie starring Denholm Elliott) - available now

A Christmas Carol (1977 BBC special showing of stage performance starring Michael Hordern) - available now

Click & Collect (2018 made-for-TV movie starring Stephen Merchant) - available now

Clash of the Santas (2008 made-for-TV movie starring Robson Green and Mark Benton) - available now

Gavin & Stacey: 12 Days of Christmas (2008 documentary on the making of the original Christmas special) - available now

Hold the Sunset Christmas Special (special Christmas episode of the series) - available now

The Lights Before Christmas: Luminous London (2018 Britbox original, “slow TV” holiday-themed special) - available now

Mock the Week Christmas Special (2018 special Christmas episode of the comedy news show) - available now

Mr. Stink (2012 made-for-TV movie based on the popular children’s book) - available now

QI Christmas Specials (2018 special Christmas episodes of the game show) - available now

The Snow Queen (2005 BBC animated movie starring Patrick Stewart) - available now

Swingin’ Christmas (2018 concert special hosted by Michael Parkinson with special guest Seth McFarlane) - available now

Upstart Crow Christmas Special (special Christmas episode of the series) - available now

Would I Lie to You Christmas Specials (special 2018 Christmas episodes of the game show) - available now

Mary Berry’s Absolute Favorites (holiday special featuring The Great British Bake Off’s Mary Berry) - available now

Acorn TV

After Henry: A Quiet Christmas (1988 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

Birds of a Feather Christmas Special (2014 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

Boomers Christmas Special (2015 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

The Brokenwood Mysteries: A Merry Bloody Christmas (2016 holiday special episode of the series) - available now)

Detectorists Christmas Special (2015 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

Fresh Fields: A Dickens of a Christmas (1985 holiday special episode of the series) - available now)

Midsomer Murders: Ghosts of Christmas Past (2004 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

Midsomer Murders: The Christmas Haunting (2013 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

A Moody Christmas (2012 Australian holiday comedy, six-episode mini-series with each episode taking place on a different Christmas) - available now

The Moodys (2014 Australian follow-up series to A Moody Christmas, with each episode taking place on a different holiday over course of a year) - available now

Murdoch Mysteries: A Merry Murdoch Christmas (2015 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

Murdoch Mysteries: Once Upon a Murdoch Christmas (2016 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

A Place to Call Home: Ghosts of Christmas Past (2014 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

The Worst Christmas of My Life (3 episode, season 3 mini-series of the British comedy series The Worst Week of My Life) - available now

The Yorkshire Vet at Christmas (2016 holiday special episode of the series) - available now

Hallmark Movies Now

It’s Christmas, Carol (2012 made-for-TV movie starring Carrie Fisher) - available now

Window Wonderland (2013 made-for-TV movie starring Chyler Leigh) - available Oct. 25

Vudu (free-to-stream titles only)

Black Christmas (1974 holiday horror film) - available now

Christmas Bunny (2010 movie starring Florence Henderson) - available now

A Christmas Carol (2018 Scottish version starring Stuart Brennan) -available now (Trailer)

Christmas Evil (1980 horror movie) - available now

Discarding Santa (2018 mockumentary) - available now

Once Upon a Time at Christmas (2017 horror movie) - available now

Pete’s Christmas (2013 made-for-TV Christmas movie starring Bailee Madison) - available now

Santa’s Christmas Crash (1995 animated special) - available now

Santa’s Christmas Snooze (1995 animated special) - available now

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964 camp classic) - available now

Santa and Pete (1999 made-for-TV movie starring James Earl Jones and Hume Cronyn) - available now

Santa and Three Bears (1970 animated special) - available now

Santa’s Slay (2004 horror movie) - available now

Santa with Muscles (1996 movie starring Hulk Hogan) - available now

In Search of Santa (2004 animated movie starring Hilary Duff) - available now

The Swan Princess Christmas (2012 animated movie) - available now

Yo Gabba Gabba!: A Very Awesome Live Holiday Show! (2014 special) - available now

Tubi

All American Christmas Carol (2013 movie starring Beverly D’Angelo) - available now

An American Christmas Carol (1979 made-for-TV movie starring Henry Winkler) - available now

An Angel for Christmas (2018 animated special) - available now

Back to Christmas (2014 made-for-TV movie) - available now

The Bear Who Slept Through Christmas (1973 animated special) - available now

The Beverly Hillbillies Christmas Adventure (new compilation of 1963 holiday episode of the series) - available now

Beyond Christmas (1940 colorized movie classic starring Harry Carey) - available now

Black Christmas (1974 slasher film) - available now

Brat Holiday Spectacular (2019 family movie) - available now (Trailer)

Brer Rabbit’s Christmas Carol (1992 animated special) - available now

A Child’s Christmas in Wales (1987 movie starring Denholm Elliott) - available now

A Christmas Adventure (2001 animated movie) - available now

Christmas All Over Again (2016 movie starring Joey Lawrence) - available now

A Christmas Carol (1935 movie classic starring Seymour Hicks) - available now

A Christmas Carol (2012 animated movie starring Gary Chalk) - available now

Christmas Crime Story (2017 thriller) - available now

Christmas Oranges (2012 movie starring Edward Herrman) - available now

Christmas Comes to Willow Creek (1987 made-for-TV movie starring John Schneider) - available now

Christmas for a Dollar (2013 made-for-TV movie) -available now

Christmas Lilies of the Field (1979 made-for-TV sequel starring Billy Dee Williams) - available now

A Christmas in New York (2017 Nathan Ives movie) - available now

My Christmas Soldier (2006 short) - available now

Christmas Twister (2012 made-for-TV holiday disaster movie) - available now

The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t (1966 Italian movie, avant garde take on A Christmas Carol) - available now

Cooper’s Christmas (2010 movie starring Jason Jones, Sam Bee and Dave Foley) - available now

Davey and Goliath Snowboard Christmas (2004 stop-motion animation movie) - available now

Discarding Santa (2018 mockumentary) - available now

The First Christmas (2005 musical starring Lauren Faber) - available now

The Fitzgerald Family Christmas (2012 movie starring Connie Britton) - available now

The Great Rupert a.k.a. A Christmas Wish (1950 movie starring Jimmy Durante) - available now

Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever (2014 made-for-TV movie) - available now

Gumby’s Christmas Capers (2014 animated special) - available now

Happy Christmas (2014 movie starring Anna Kendrick) - available now

I Believe in Christmas (1984 French family movie) - available now

Let’s Kill Grandpa this Christmas (2017 black comedy) - available now

The Magic Christmas Tree (1964 fantasy movie) - available now

Mary Christmas (2002 made-for-TV movie starring Tom Bosley and Cynthia Gibb) - available now

Mercy Christmas (2017 holiday horror-comedy) - available now

A Miracle on Christmas Lake (2016 made-for-TV Canadian movie) - available now

Molly and the Christmas Monster (2016 animated special) - available now

Noelle (2018 movie starring Luiz Baille and Sean Patrick Brennan) - available now

A Pahappahooey Island Christmas (2005 puppet special) - available now

Pete’s Christmas (2013 made-for-TV Christmas movie starring Bailee Madison) - available now

The Real St. Nick (2012 made-for-TV movie starring Torrey DeVitto) -available now

Red Christmas (2016 holiday horror movie starring Dee Wallace) - available now

Santa’s Castle (2018 family movie) - available now (Trailer)

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964 camp classic) - available now

Santa Mouse and the Reindeer (2000 animated special) -available now

Santa's Special Delivery (1999 animated special) - available now

Santa and Three Bears (1970 animated special) - available now

The Side Show Christmas (2008 animated special) - available now

Throwback Holiday (2018 made-for-TV movie) - available now

The Tangerine Bear: Home in Time for Christmas (1999 animated special) -available now

Winslow the Christmas Bear (1995 family movie) -available now

The Wizard’s Christmas (2014 animated movie) -available now

The Wizard’s Christmas: Return of the Snow King (2014 animated movie sequel) -available now

Roku Channel

Christmas Eve (1947 movie starring George Raft) - available now

A Christmas to Remember (2015 movie starring Robin Givens) - available now

Joyeux Noel (2005 movie written/directed by Christian Carion) - available now

Mixed Nuts (1994 movie starring Steve Martin) - available now

Shelby: The Dog Who Saved Christmas (2014 movie starring Chevy Chase) - available now

Hoopla

48 Christmas Wishes (2017 movie starring Liam MacDonald and Clara Kushnir) (Trailer) - available now

Abbott & Costello Christmas Show (1955 Christmas special) - available now

All American Christmas Carol (2013 movie starring Beverly D’Angelo) - available now

The American St. Nick (2015 documentary) - available now

An All Dogs Christmas Carol (1998 animated movie) - available now

Apollo 8: Christmas at the Moon (2003 documentary) - available now

Babar and Father Christmas (1986 animated special) - available now

Babes in Toyland (1996 movie starring Keanu Reeves and Drew Barrymore) - available now

Back to Christmas (2014 made-for-TV movie) - available now

The Bear Who Slept Through Christmas (1973 animated special) - available now

Believe (2017 Santa documentary) - available now

Beyond Christmas (1940 colorized movie classic starring Harry Carey) - available now

Caillou’s Holiday Movie (2003 animated movie based on the PBS series) - available now

Candles in the Dark (1993 Macimillian Schell movie) - available now

Charles Dickens: A Christmas Carol (1982 animated movie) - available now

Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol (2012 Jason Figgis movie) - available now

Chasing Christmas (2005 made-for-TV movie starring Tom Arnold) - available now

A Child’s Christmas (2008 British animated special, narrated by Matthew Rhys) - available now

A Child’s Christmas in Wales (1987 movie starring Denholm Elliott) - available now

The Chosen (2018 special telling the story of the first Christmas) - available now

A Christmas Carol (1935 movie classic starring Seymour Hicks; colorized version a.k.a. Scrooge) - available now

A Christmas Carol (2002 animated movie starring Tim Curry and Whoopi Goldberg) - available now

A Christmas Carol (2015 Canadian movie starring Simon Baker) - available now

Chirstmas & Co. (2017 French family film) - available now

The Christmas Elves (2016 animated special) - available now

Christmas Eve (2015 movie starring Patrick Stewart) - available now

Christmas in Hollywood (2014 children’s film, a Chinese co-production) - available now

A Christmas in New York (2017 Nathan Ives movie) - available now

Christmas in New York (2005 animated special) - available now

Christmas in Wonderland (2007 made-for-TV movie starring Patrick Swayze) - available now

Christmas Lilies of the Field (1979 made-for-TV sequel starring Billy Dee Williams) - available now

Christmas Miracle at Sage Creek (2005 made-for-TV movie starring David Carradine) - available now

Christmas on the Coast (2017 movie starring Julie Ann Emery) - available now (Trailer)

Christmas Panic (2016 animated special set in the Town Called Panic universe) - available now

Christmas Perfection (2018 made-for-TV movie starring Caitlin Thompson, James Henri-Thomas and Robbie Silverman) - available now

The Christmas Stallion (1992 movie starring Peter Edwards) - available now

The Christmas Star (1986 Disney movie) - available now

The Christmas Wife (1988 made-for-TV movie starring Jason Robards) - available now

Christmas with the Kranks (2004 movie starring Tim Allen) - available now

A Christmas Without Snow (1980 made-for-TV movie starring John Houseman and Michael Learned) - available now

Clara’s Ultimate Christmas (2016 family movie) - available now

Cooper’s Christmas (2010 movie starring Jason Jones, Sam Bee and Dave Foley) - available now

Cosmic Christmas (1977 animated special) - available now

Darkest Night (2013 holiday horror film) - available now

Disneyland Around the Seasons (1966 TV special) - available now

Elf-Man (2012 movie starring Mackenzie Astin) - available now

Getting to the Nutcracker: The Making of a Christmas Classic (2014 documentary) - available now

The Gift of the Magi (2001 live-action special) - available now

Great British Baking Show: Christmas Masterclass (2016 special) - available now

The Great Rupert a.k.a. A Christmas Wish (1950 movie starring Jimmy Durante) - available now

Guess How Much I Love You: Christmas to the Moon and Back (2017 animated special) - available now

Gumby’s Christmas Capers (2014 animated special) - available now

Happy Christmas (2014 movie starring Anna Kendrick) - available now

The Happy Elf (2005 animated special starring Harry Connick Jr.) - available now

The Heart of Christmas (2011 made-for-TV movie starring Candace Cameron Bure) - available now

I Believe in Santa Claus (1984 French children’s movie, dubbed in English) - available now

Inspector Gadget Saves Christmas (1992 animated special) - available now

Jack Frost (1997 holiday horror film) - available now

Jingle Hell (2000 movie starring James Brennan) - available now

The Least of These: A Christmas Story (2018 movie starring Tayla Lynn) - available now (Trailer)

Love at the Christmas Table (a.k.a. Christmas Love Story, 2013 made-for-TV movie starring Danica McKellar) - available now

Lovely, Still (2010 movie starring Martin Landau, Elizabeth Banks and Ellen Bustyn) - available now

Mandie and the Forgotten Christmas (2011 children’s movie) - available now

Meet John Doe (1941 Frank Capra classic starring Barbara Stanwyck and Gary Cooper)

Mercy Christmas (2017 holiday horror film) - available now

Midnight Clear (2007 movie starring Stephen Baldwin) - available now

Mister Scrooge To See You (2013 movie that imagines what happened after A Christmas Carol) - available now

A Muppets Christmas: Letters to Santa (2008 movie) - available now

My Dad is Scrooge (2015 children’s movie) - available now

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t (2017 special) - available now

The Night Before Christmas (2016 animated special) - available now

Noel (2014 movie starring Penelope Cruz and Paul Walker) - available now

Nutcracker: The Motion Picture (1986 Pacific Northwest ballet performance) - available now

The Nutcracker Sweet (2015 animated movie starring Alicia Silverstone) - available now

One Christmas (1994 movie starring Katherine Hepburn and Henry Winkler, based on the Truman Capote story) - available now

Pixi Saves Christmas (2018 animated special) - available now

Red Boots for Christmas (1995 animated special) - available now

Red Skelton Christmas Classics (1955 variety specials highlights) - available now

The Ride (2012 faith-based film) - available now

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964 camp classic) - available now

Santa’s Christmas Circus (1966 Whizzo the Clown special) - available now

Santa’s Christmas Crash (1995 animated special) - available now

Santa’s Christmas Snooze (1995 animated special) - available now

Saving Christmas (2014 film created by Kirk Cameron dubbed the “worst movie of all time”) - available now

The Secret of the Nutcracker (2015 movie starring Janelle Jorde) - available now

Shelby (2015 movie starring Chevy Chase and Tom Arnold) - available now

Sick for Toys (2018 holiday horror movie) - available now (Trailer)

Snowmance (2017 made-for-TV movie starring Ashley Newbrough) - available now

Snowmeggdon (2011 made-for-TV holiday disaster movie) - available now

Some Girls (1988 movie starring Jennifer Connelly) - available now

The Tangerine Bear (2000 animated special starring Jonathan Taylor Thomas) - available now

The Side Show Christmas (2008 animated special) - available now

This is Christmas (2018 holiday film directed by Joseph Rassulo) - available now

Three Wise Guys (2006 movie starring Judd Nelson and Tom Arnold) - available now

Tiny Christmas (2017 made-for-TV family movie starring Riele Downs and Lizzy Greene) - available now

The Toys That Saved Christmas (1996 animated movie) - available now

The Truth About Christmas (2018 made-for-TV movie starring Kali Hawk) - available now (Trailer) ****Review****

Unlikely Angel (1996 made-for-TV movie starring Dolly Parton) - available now

A Very Merry Cricket (1973 animated classic) - available now

Wild Kratts: A Creature Christmas (2015 animated Christmas special) - available now

Kanopy

Black Christmas (1974 holiday horror film) - available now

Charles Dickens: A Christmas Carol (1982 animated movie) - available now

Christmas, Again (2014 movie written and directed by Charles Poekel) - available now

Christmas in New York (2005 animated special) - available now

A Christmas Story Documentary: Road Trip For Ralphie (2008 documentary about the classic Christmas film) - available now

Dreaming of a Jewish Christmas (2017 documentary) - available now

Getting to the Nutcracker: The Making of a Christmas Classic (2014 documentary) - available now

Rare Exports: A Christmas tale (2010 holiday horror movie) - available now

The Silent Partner (1978 movie starring Elliott Gould) - available now

A Street Cat Named Bob (2016 British movie based on the book) - available now

The Store (1983 Neiman-Marcus documentary) -available now

Wild Kratts: A Creature Christmas (2015 animated Christmas special) - available now

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