#Johnson smith

[acrylicqueen]

I decided to redraw an old expression test I did with Johnson back in 2019. I think it turned out real nice.

2019 version under the cut:

[zoomar]

"So's Your Old Man" ring

Wear One of These Comical Motto Rings - Lots of innocent fun

If you sometimes find it difficult, from diffidence or shyness, to get on friendly terms with the opposite sex, just display one of these rings and see if it does not smooth the way to a more familiar acquaintance and cordial friendship.

[ablacktv]

Work Dump

[nllick]

In da clurb we all fag

[olipeaksforever]

Twin Peaks frames as The Smiths songs

In order: I Want The One I Can't Have, Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me, Back To The Old House, Well I Wonder, There Is A Light That Never Goes Out, The Queen is Dead, Girl Afraid, Sheila Take A Bow, Sweet and Tender Hooligan and How Soon Is Now?

[calciumdeficientt]

waiter waiter! more stupidity!

[zxid]

bunch of practices i did back then

[cheezy-whizz]

silly guys in silly glasses (I would die for each and everyone of these men)

[hug-your-face]

Stuff like this existed and you could buy it mail-order from the Johnson Smith Catalog.

It was a thick, pulp-paper pamphlet with each page absolutely crammed with products. Sometimes single pages of the catalog would be printed in the back pages of comic books.

Each product was described in about as much detail as the Skeletons Fucking cassette above, and the actual product was usually of the same quality. For example:

U-Control 7-Foot Life-Size GHOST. USE indoors and outdoors. Acts life-like. You control in secret. Ready to operate. Rises, falls, floats, spooky effects, darts, dances. Includes: inflatable head and white shroud "body" (about 7-ft overall) with near invisible 50-ft control line. Includes detailed instructions.

My dudes, I got one of these. It was a white balloon, a 12 ft x 12 ft white plastic sheet, and a length of fishing line. The detailed instructions were basically "put the sheet over the balloon, tie the line to it, chuck the whole thing over a tree limb, and pull on the string to make it dance."

And 80% of the hundreds of goodies inside this catalog were just like that. Not all of them: There were also a couple of gadgets, like the "10-in-1 Optical Device", or the "Electrostatic Generator," that did seem pretty rad to a tiny kid. But most of them set expectations far higher than the actual thing would deliver.

And honestly that was part of the fun. "Oh I can't wait to hear what Johnson Smith Skeleton Romance Cassette is gonna sound like!" The price was always just low enough that more than likely you'd shake your head and wonder why the grown-ups failed to make things as awesome as you could IMAGINE them. And then you'd order yet another crazy gottam thing, KNOWING that THIS one was gonna be just sick.

No need to sell your shitpost goods out of your car and then flee. Just like shitpost blogs have thousands of followers, the Johnson Smith Company was a legit going concern that GOT REPEAT CUSTOMERS by selling its shitpost products until they closed their doors in 2019.

I'm pretty sure that in the 70s you could have made some sort of a career out of being good at shitposting. Getting yourself a cassette tape recorder and just recording shit like "Sounds of Two Skeletons Fucking" and then sell them in some makeshift booth in the weird side of town, and the people won't know what the hell they're buying before they do and get home, put it on their cassette player and it's just a loud sound of clattering.

Half the people feel like they got scammed and vow that they're going to find and strangle the damn conman selling this garbage, and the other half laugh from the sheer absurdity and say that they'll gotta go back to that Songs That Make You Say "What The Fuck" booth again tomorrow to see what the other bizarre tapes would be. Neither of them will ever find me again. I have already packed up all my shit in my 1962 Chrysler Valiant and driven off, already in the next town over, never to be seen again.

[jimmyshopkins]

Some of my fave characters from bully... And also gary

Black n white version below and a ramble abt what i wanna do with this acc:

So, if u haven't noticed i took a long break bc i started a new college and my life is really chaotic atm.. I'm still drawing, just not posting it or whatever. I don't really draw that much bully art anymore, and might make this a general art blog where i post all my art and also reblog other art i like. If i do this I'll change my url and ppl following just for bully content are of course free to unfollow me, though i won't stop drawing bully art! It'll just be less common compared to my other stuff, which is mostly mixed medium traditional art. Thanks for all the support and love on my bully posts, it means a lot <3

[fanofspooky]

Suspiria

Monkey Man

I Saw The TV Glow

[celorangeine]

I support Bullying!

[baflegacy]

smosh vs aliens spoilers //

GOD the more i think about mary’s death the more that i’m so devastated by it like. all of them were literally just KIDS they were MIDDLE SCHOOLERS but mary literally FELL TO HER DEATH without any of her friends there for her. thinking about the fact that she must’ve been so scared and so alone. about how she probably thinks that her mom hates her and that she’s the reason her parents Will Still Be Divorced because of what she did.

do you ever think about the fact that mary didn’t even know that that wasn’t her mom anymore. do you ever think about mary still believing that there was still some part of her mom that’s There and believed that her mom was gonna save her, like she always did.

[lanphobic]

Here's some more sillies

[lukesvangelista]

— 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒗𝒆: 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝒊𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒐𝒏!

BEST FRIEND can we talk? — read 11:13 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) what? my text door neighbor is texting me FIRST? — read 11:13 pm.

BEST FRIEND forget about it i'll just go talk to someone else it's okay — read 11:13 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) hey no no no — read 11:14 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) i didn't mean to upset you i'm so sorry — read 11:14 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) of course we can talk. are you okay? — read 11:14 pm.

BEST FRIEND thank you — read 11:14 pm.

BEST FRIEND it's just been a rough night i've been thinking a lot about some things my friends said about me and it just isn't making me feel the greatest — read 11:14 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) what happened? i mean, only if you want to talk about it. i'm not here to judge — read 11:15 pm.

BEST FRIEND okay so my friend adam has always been on my ass about my dry personality — read 11:15 pm.

BEST FRIEND and he keeps telling me that i need to fix it, but i can't. i had a vibrant personality as a kid but then i got made fun of for it, so i've just kept to myself since then — read 11:15 pm.

BEST FRIEND and i just don't know what to do anymore — read 11:15 pm

weird ass neighbor (?) oh my god i'm so sorry — read 11:15 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) you don't deserve that AT ALL. adam sounds like a real asshole and if he can't accept you for who you are then he doesn't deserve you. — read 11:16 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) and i'm sorry if this all came from me comparing your personality to connor bedard's. i didn't think it would hurt you i just thought it was funny but i won't do it again if that will make you more comfortable — read 11:16 pm.

BEST FRIEND yeah — read 11:16 pm.

BEST FRIEND about that — read 11:16 pm.

BEST FRIEND i'm not actually upset — read 11:16 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) what?? — read 11:16 pm.

BEST FRIEND i just wanted to tell you that you give me ankle biter vibes — read 11:17 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) excuse me? — read 11:17 pm.

BEST FRIEND you give me ankle biter vibes — read 11:17 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) i heard you the first time, you asshole and you thought that was an okay thing to fake just to tell me i give off ankle biter vibes? — read 11:17 pm.

BEST FRIEND yeah… — read 11:17 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) fuckin unbelievable — read 11:18 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX okay this has gone too far. hi random nameless girl, this isn't connor, this is his friend will. our friend adam stole connor's phone from him and pulled this shit, i'm so sorry — read 11:18 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX this wasn't fair to you, and i want to make it clear that connor had nothing to do with this at all! i will scold adam for this — read 11:18 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) what? — read 11:18 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) what the fuck is happening??? — read 11:18 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX hi this is adam now — read 11:18 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX i want to make it clear that connor did say you gave off ankle biter vibes — read 11:18 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX but he didn't have anything to do with anything else. he doesn't even know we stole his phone — read 11:19 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX will was supposed to be supervising me but he got distracted by a dog — read 11:19 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX

— read 11:20 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) wait a fucking minute what the fuck is going on is that fucking will smith?

— read 11:21 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) like fucking 4th overall pick of the 2023 nhl draft will smith? — read 11:21 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX well it certainly isn't "the (fucking) pursuit of happyness" will smith — read 11:21 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) hey adam? — read 11:21 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX yeah? — read 11:21 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) shut the fuck up before i chris rock your ass got it? — read 11:22 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX yes ma'am 🫡 — read 11:22 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) good! — read 11:22 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) so let me get this straight — read 11:22 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) if that's will smith, then i really am talking to connor bedard? — read 11:22 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX well, technically not now — read 11:22 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) and let me guess! you're adam fantilli? — read 11:22 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX the one and only :) — read 11:23 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) how's it feel having the same number of points as kent johnson this year despite playing in 14 more games? ☺️ — read 11:23 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX this is will again — read 11:23 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX adam handed me the phone because you really hurt his ego thank you for your service — read 11:23 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) it was my absolute pleasure — read 11:23 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) so if i may ask who all knows about this text door neighbor thing? — read 11:23 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX uhhh hold on i actually don't know — read 11:23 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX let me ask adam — read 11:23 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX this is adam again — read 11:24 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX me, kent johnson, cole sillinger, will, and bedsy know — read 11:24 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) bedsy knows?! what an astute observation, einstein! — read 11:24 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX okay miss "is that fucking will smith?! fuck fuck fuck will smith?!" you're gonna get a kick out of this one!!! — read 11:24 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) enlighten me, einstein!!! — read 11:24 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX bedsy told me about your crush on korchinski — read 11:24 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) he WHAT?! oh for fuck's sake — read 11:25 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX well i then went and told kj and then silly, but they didn't tell anyone! i swear! — read 11:25 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX but will also knows i just told him — read 11:25 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) well isn't that just so fun! — read 11:25 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX it is! i'm really enjoying this :) — read 11:25 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) well hey that's so funny! cuz you're fucking dead! — read 11:25 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX now hey it's not very funny to wish harm upon someone but you know what is funny? — read 11:25 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX that we know you have a huge crush on korchinski but don't know your name! — read 11:25 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) y/n — read 11:26 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX well that was easy — read 11:26 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) yk it's funny, usually when you want to learn something about a person (ex. their name) you have to ask! clearly that's something that none of you boys thought of until just now!!! — read 11:26 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX well i for one think your name is very pretty - will — read 11:26 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) well thank you will! i think yours is pretty great as well — read 11:26 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX thank you 🥹 - will — read 11:26 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) you're welcome 😇 - y/n — read 11:26 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX and what about mine? - adam — read 11:27 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) i hate it! 😚 - y/n — read 11:27 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX i'm telling kj 😔 - adam — read 11:27 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) he'll agree with me ☺️ - y/n — read 11:27 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX it's true he will agree with you 😊 - will — read 11:27 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) well i hate to do this, but unfortunately i will have to cut our wonderful conversation short 😔 i have to be up early tomorrow — read 11:27 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX awww! what a travesty 🤭 — read 11:28 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) the only travesty is your start to the season, adam 😊 — read 11:28 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX goodnight y/n! - will and adam — read 11:28 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) goodnight will! - y/n — read 11:29 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX umm? excuse me?? that was signed from will AND adam??? - adam— read 11:29 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) oh i'm sorry! let me fix it — read 11:29 pm.

asshole to the fucking MAX thank you — read 11:29 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) of course! — read 11:29 pm.

weird ass neighbor (?) goodnight will! — read 11:30 pm.

taglist: @chericherilvr @chiblackhawks @19mercer @rowdyluv @delilaahh9 @ceces-obsessions @okimhereiguess @lonelybitch101

if you would like to be added to the taglist reply to this post!

[angelbarelywrites]

Masterlist!

Slashers

scenarios

first meeting (part 2) kisses! (part 2) sharing a bed (part 2) you’re almost a victim… (part 2) your first time together is…your first time (part 2) let’s get kinky (part 2) y’all accidentally adopt a child (part two)

oneshots

tommy gets jealous - thomas hewitt x reader

mine - thomas hewitt x reader (nsfw)

good one - thomas hewitt x reader

The Walking Dead

scenarios

birthday (negan)

dating negan

The Boys

scenarios

dating billy