#John Kramer

[codingfate]

i’d be a much better jigsaw apprentice than mark hoffman because all he does while they set up the games is pout and be all grumpy whereas i would be asking john interesting and thought-provoking questions like “is the grinch his name or his ethnicity or his job?” and he’d love it

[nightmaredollyyy]

𝑵𝑨𝑼𝑮𝑯𝑻𝒀 𝑶𝑹 𝑵𝑰𝑪𝑬 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑪𝑯𝑶𝑰𝑪𝑬 𝑰𝑺 𝒀𝑶𝑼𝑹𝑺🎅❤️⛓️

𝑽𝒊𝒂 @𝑺𝒂𝒘 𝒐𝒏 𝑰𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒎

[cherryflavoredzombie]

are there any jigsquad fanfics where it’s just mark and amanda arguing for 10,000+ words while adam and lawrence are making out on the sidelines

[zekeyboy]

can saw characters cook?

adam - barely. he’s got solid basics (eggs, grilled cheese, etc) but if he tries a complicated dish it’ll turn out…. subpar

lawrence - yes. not as good as allison can, but raising a kid makes you learn to make a few solid dishes

amanda - never learned, but she’s got the potential

hoffman - no. look at me. he cannot. im sure he can cook a burger and pasta and thats it

strahm - he could if he wanted to, but he lives on a strict diet of coffee and protein bars when necessary 98% of the time

perez - yes. she can cook the best out of everyone on this list

kramer - he can cook. jill was treated well

eric - he can’t. his wife did all the cooking so he’s stuck eating tv dinners now

rigg - he’s mediocre. he’s been learning but he’s in the habit of burning things

kerry - she’s got basics but she’s more of a baker if anything

tapp - no. not at all, no intention to learn.

sing - he can cook and he is the only reason tapp stays fed somedays

gibson - he is always snacking on something of course he can cook

[uwu-scraptrappy]

Furrys your saw because why the fuck not

A lot of these were suggestions on Reddit by people with much bigger brains than me that had the most correct takes on everything

Reasonings down below:

John: Cross orb weaver. Spiders are known for their beautiful webs used to trap their prey, which fit John because his whole deal is making elaborate traps. I chose a cross orb weaver specifically because orb weavers have some of the most beautiful webs I've ever seen and religious symbolism goes hard.

Diego: Pallid Bat. Okay I didn't really have a specific reason for him, a bat just fits him in a way I can't describe. It just goes hard tbh

Adam: Opossum. It just made sense, that guy is so possum. Also I may be leaning into the Adam is alive theory, but opossums are really good at playing dead.

Hoffman: Orca. Orcas are big, bulky pack animals, which not only fits him design wise, but plays into his fall from grace stemming from the death of his sister.

Billy: Piglet. Billy is, essentially, the mascot of the apprentices. He's like the VTuber model. And pigs are a whole thing in Saw lore, so why not merge the two?

Logan: Fox. I wanted to make both Logan and Lawrence canines, since I planned for Jill to be a canine and something something blond doctors. Anyways I chose a fox in particular since foxes are often depicted as tricksters and deceitful, and Jigsaw was, essentially, about deceiving the police and tricking them into believing it was Halloran that was Jigsaw.

Michael: English spot rabbit. Buny.

Zep: Hyena. Have you EVER seen a MF that looked more like a hyena? Yeah, didn't think so.

Amanda: Maine Coon. I feel like she's very feline coded in general, and Maine Coon cats are usually loners just as Amanda is. Cats are also stereotyped to be mean and feisty animals, and guess what Amanda is?

Lynn: Vampire deer. Wouldn't it be funny if all the Denlons were deer because their son got run over. Jokes aside this design unironically goes kinda hard and I like it.

[why-jigsaw-is-a-middle-schooler]

y u bully me :,|

Hello John.

Over the years, you set your countless kidnapped victims up for failure. You placed them into a situation causing an almost certain death, and you called this perversion a test of their will.

As an insult to the gruesome injury you inflicted, you bullied your subjects in your so-called instructional tapes, calling them “mostly just pathetic” and “unworthy of the body you possess". As someone who did this to feel some power over the news of his deteriorating health, you are very familiar with the seemingly endless pharmaceuticals you swallow. Today, your prescription is a taste of your own medicine:

You will be bullied.

This is your test.

[quinngefail]

honestly though

I'm kinda stuck on thinking about what would've happened if Gideon was born yet the events of Saw still happened

Would he be a Kylo Ren type character where he's following John in his footsteps or just an annoying ass little kid that irritates the other apprentices?

HSJGGKGK Both are really funny to think about 😭

On a more serious note, though, you could go in circles for hours over just. Wondering if Gideon would have looked at him with pride, or shame..... If he would have happily worn the Kramer name, or strictly chosen to go by his mother's name. If he would have been like a shadow to John, or if he would have actually been there for Jill in her time of need, when his dad chose not to (which obv in this world, there'd have to be a different inciting incident for John to fully go off the deep end, and all but abandon Jill when SHE WAS FUCKIN GOING THROUGH IT TOO),

WE'LL JUST NEVER KNOW 😔

But like also in a world with an adult Gideon, and where John is still kicking (we're ignoring the cancer here for the bit), I just need at least one instance of

"AND THEN I PUT THOSE UNGRATEFUL, LOW INCOME KIDS IN A GAME WHERE THEY HAD ONE MINUTE TO CUT THEMSELVES IN HALF OR ELSE THEY WOULD HAVE HAD MULTIPLE THREE TO FIVE INCH-SIZED HOLES EXPLODED INTO THEIR HEADS. BECAUSE THEY DARED TO TURN TO SELF-DESTRUCTION IN A SOCIETY THAT REJECTED THEM AT EVERY TURN. ✊️ BECAUSE THAT WAS THEIR FAULT, OBVIOUSLY ✊️ SHOULDN'T HAVE CHOSEN TO BE POOR 😩"

"Yes, dad, they're all very ungrateful, please just take your medication,"

But uh goofiness aside lol. MUCH TO THINK ABOUT,

I just know that whatever last name I chose to go by, I'd be changing my first name without a second thought 😩 Fuck ass name. Gideon. Okay lmao

[riggedtrap]

“we need an alcohol free queer space for adults with no friends to meet each other”

[sawdistorted]

completely losing it at this age rating review for saw (2004)

[koiposting]

actual nightmare blunt rotation

[jigsaw-copycat]

who's coming to the saw patrol double feature /j

[ID: An article headline from the website Den of Geek reading "Forget Barbenheimer and Get Ready for Saw Patrol. Saw X and Paw Patrol: The Mighty Movie are now set to be released on the same day." End ID.]

[motherdanger]

"kill them with kindness" wrong. SAW BATHROOM TRAP. 🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚 🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚 🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚🪚

[akascow]

i have this picture as my current desktop screen so everytime i close my laptop i say ‘game over’ and slam it shut

[turnipoddity]

my favorite critically acclaimed movie

[gomi--neko]

Lawrence being a jigsaw apprentice makes Saw 3 extremely funny