#Jason Statham's Big Vacation

[kristsune]

I know Ben attempted to make a more annoying character than Alex usually does, but he failed to remember that I always love Alex's characters, so I was bound to also love Francis Strattam Common, Jason Statham's Agent, and lover. Bonus screenshot from the Rusty Bits video - the group escaping from the very very hot room - on Patreon.

[merelymatt]

Meet Jason's Agent Grayson Bacon

At Dragonmeet 2022, I was in The D20 Future Show's live game of Jason Statham's Big Vacation, playing Jason's agent!

The audio from that game is now up, just in time for the Merely Roleplayers live show at Dragonmeet 2023.

Enjoy snorkelling, crab petting, Jedi training and several attempts to marry Jason Statham, all on the picturesque Isle of Fernando. 🏖

[merelymatt]

On top of all these Merely Roleplayers possibilities, a couple of things I've been a guest on are also eligible this year!

Unfortunately the Heart: The City Beneath two-shot on Actual Play UK, which I'm legitimately proud of, straddles the eligibility cutoff; part 1 came out within the period but part 2 was outside it. Because of the way the CRIT Awards do their awarding periods, though, it might well qualify for the 2025 round! So keep it in mind for next year 😂

In the meantime, here's what I've been in that does qualify:

Best of Actual Plays

Best One Shot

I'm Not Lion https://youtu.be/gkAg_Mqiq1U

(with Actual Play UK, in which I played a lawyer who's a literal snake and we reached a critical mass of animal wordplay beyond anything @maddyisabstract's lion judge could have anticipated)

Jason Statham Live https://www.podomatic.com/podcasts/d20futureshow/episodes/2023-11-04T03_38_30-07_00 | https://www.podomatic.com/podcasts/d20futureshow/episodes/2023-11-18T02_00_00-08_00

(with the D20 Future Show, in which I played Jason Statham's agent Grayson Bacon; recorded in Dec 2022 but aired on the podcast in Nov 2023)

Best of Their Games

Best Player | Indie

Matt Boothman https://www.instagram.com/merelymatt/

(I technically qualify for this category for my performances as Crawl Newman and Grayson Bacon in the above 2 one-shots – gotta shoot your shot, right? 🤣)

Nominate Merely Roleplayers in the CRIT Awards 2024

The Creator Recognition in Tabletop RPG Awards are open for nominations until the end of May, and lots of our stuff from the past year is eligible!

You all got us to the final ballot in 2 categories last year – thank you again, it was incredible to hear the words "Merely Roleplayers" read out alongside so many luminaries of roleplaying and storytelling!

Could we make it 3 this year?

Could we even make it to a win??

At this nomination stage, you're free to nominate whoever and whatever you like in each category. It's free choice, not multiple choice. Then people/things with enough nominations get put on the final ballot for everyone to check out and vote on.

Most of the categories ask for a link or social media handle to help the CRIT team vet nominations. Plus, I know from filling out my own nominations how hard it can sometimes be to work out what actually falls within the eligibility period (which this year is 1 Jan 2023–29 Feb 2024 – RPG vendors please put the publication date on the game's page!!).

So here's a handy list of what we've done that came out in that period, the categories you could nominate them in, and the relevant links and handles:

Best of Actual Plays

Best Series

Vigil: The Great Fire https://foggyoutline.com/roleplayers-episodes/category/The+Great+Fire

Vigil: Chief/Exec https://foggyoutline.com/roleplayers-episodes/category/Chief%2FExec

Vigil: Fear Itself https://foggyoutline.com/roleplayers-episodes/category/Fear+Itself

(and in the Studio...)

Falling Cadence https://foggyoutline.com/roleplayers-episodes/category/Falling+Cadence

The Queen's Dead https://foggyoutline.com/roleplayers-episodes/category/The+Queen%27s+Dead

The Office Party https://foggyoutline.com/roleplayers-episodes/category/Office+Party

Best NPC

Any and all NPCs from the above 6 productions, including 2023 nominee Ernest Bering, Agent of DoOm...

It's up to you to decide, based on his actions in Vigil: Fear Itself, whether oor Ernie belongs in this category or in:

Best Villain

Any and all villains from the above 6 productions, including Ada Lovelace (Great Fire), Max Dashwood (Chief/Exec), Morrigan the War Chieftain (Chief/Exec), the Harlequin (Fear Itself) and (possibly, as above) Ernest Bering, Agent of DoOm.

Best of their Games

Best Game Master | Indie

Matt Boothman https://www.instagram.com/merelymatt/

Josh Yard https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

Best Player | Indie

Ellie Pitkin https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Persephone 'Percy' Byron in Great Fire and Camilla Parnell in Falling Cadence)

Dave https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Mick Mason in Great Fire and Josh in Office Party)

Strat https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Brier in Great Fire and Jerome Picklepants in Office Party)

Chris MacLennan https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Kincaid in Great Fire)

Natalie Winter https://www.instagram.com/winternatters/

(plays Gwynned in Chief/Exec and Bess in Office Party)

Marta Da Silva https://www.instagram.com/nanaluvren/

(plays Harper in Chief/Exec)

Josh Yard https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Jinny Greenteeth in Chief/Exec)

Vikki https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Renko in Chief/Exec and Cadence Fairchild in Falling Cadence)

Alexander Pankhurst https://www.instagram.com/apankhurst/

(plays Graham in Fear Itself and Reginald 'Skinsy' Skinner in Falling Cadence)

Chris Starkey https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Cameron Jarvis in Fear Itself and Neville Flounder, aka the Living Shadow, aka Night Gannet in Office Party)

Ellen Gould https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Jess Butterworth in Fear Itself)

Helen Stratton https://www.instagram.com/merelyroleplayers/

(plays Stella Sylvester in Falling Cadence)

Fiona KT Howat https://www.instagram.com/unspeakablyfiona/

(plays the Skeletal Duchy in The Queen's Dead)

Naomi Clarke https://www.instagram.com/naomithinksit/

(plays the Draugr Earldom in The Queen's Dead)

Best of Podcasts

Best Podcast

Merely Roleplayers https://www.merelyroleplayers.com

Best Podcast Host

Matt Boothman https://www.instagram.com/merelymatt/

Thank you! Can't wait to see who gets nominated this year!

[rustyelias]

Rusty quill gaming Jason Statham’s big vacation special oh how I love you <3

[loverboybrightsideghost]

jason statham's big vacation you will always be famous to me

[miscreantahead]

rqg jason statham's big vacation is ending me

[tangleweave]

Beneath the cut is the look of a man on vacation, but after just 8 hours away, would almost prefer to be back at work.

Cut for mun face, travel woes, language, and general grumpiness.

A lot of shenanigans happened. I flew several hundred miles (and boy are my arms tired!) and am currently in the D.C. area to attend a cousin's wedding. The flight was fine. Checking into the hotel was simple. DoorDashing food to the hotel at midnight is a treat. However, the car rental was an absolute fucking nightmare.

We joined a queue that was several lengths of cordon long, and after 20 minutes in that line got told, along with several others, to go from that line, manned by 4 clerks, to another line manned by just 1. Then, after those 4 clerks scrammed the remainder of their reduced queue, 3 of them fucked off for the night... and we stood in our alternate line for another hour and a fucking half, while everybody else whod been in the first line got to drive off. My other half was ready to aggressively shit on Budget's entire countertop.

And then we finally got to the counter... and can someone tell me how is this process cheaper using a credit card than a debit card? Credit comes from a big corporate payee -- fine, I get it, but you can fucking hit my debit card up for your cash just as easily! In order to allow the use of a debit card, Budget/Avis make you show them your return travel plans, pay an exorbitant deposit, and subject you to a soft credit check. Let's not even talk about how they upsell the goddamn insurance packages to half the cost of the original rental. The total about knocked me off my aching feet. It's twice the cost of the hotel room. Do I have the money? Yes. Do I like spending it in this fashion? Absolutely not.

I'm eating take-out now, and going to try to get some sleep before this whirlwind 3-day event begins.

But driving in the fucking hellscape that is Baltimore-to-D.C. is a bloodsport to a degree so vicious, Jason Statham would blink before making a movie here. So limiting exposure to liability in the event of a terrible accident on the 495 seemed like a wise choice. The whole ride, my other half was alternating between grabbing her Oh Shit handle and trying to provide meaningful navigational support... but I had to ask her at one point to bite her tongue because I wasn't in the frame of mind to accept concrit.

And my eyes are bloodshot because they'd had enough of my contacts.

FLOP.

[kmp78]

"“to see what is obvious and right in front of them”

Pictures are not receipts. This is why showbusiness was invented - to make you believe based on pictures. Jared is not your guy next door. He is a celebrity - an industry of billions. Remember - they will show you exactly what they want you to see. They as he and his PR people - an entire agency works specifically for his PR and image. Social media is a big part of the image of celebrities."

It's useless to explain it to her.She believes only in the power of her blog.Let her do what she wants.There are a lot of people like her, they don't even know the whole truth about the underside of Hollywood.Celebrity images are carefully planned, agencies hire journalists, paparazzi, models, anyone.There they can marry and have children under contract, while secretly meeting on the side with representatives of the same sex.The main thing is money and the attention of ordinary people.Karens will go crazy if the find out that Brad Pitt is gay (he is not gay, this is for example), and will no longer give money for tickets to his films.Is it clear how it works?Agencies don't hire dumb people😂They know their work😏 Many people say everywhere about Jared that he is bi.That's all.No more details.By the way, Vin Diesel and Jason Statham are ordering escort guys😂 But they are married and have children.

"Pictures are not receipts"

Then why were cameras even invented? 🤔

Why do we all take a shit ton of pics on our vacations if not to SHOW OTHER PEOPLE WHERE WE WERE and to remember the good times ourselves? 🤔

[incorrect-rqg]

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

This isn't a tournament, there were just too many specials to put in a single poll. There will be a second round where we compare the top 4 polls.

[olivereactsaboutgarbage]

Higurashi When They Cry - Arc 1 Chapter 2

Well, as they say in Hollywood. “Hoo hoo hoo!” I think they say that in Hollywood. What does that have to do with Higurashi? Heh... wouldn’t you like to know...

Ah yes. The non-toddlers are gonna give Keiichi a Town Tour. Did I mention that last time? It’s impossible for me to know, since I can’t read.

When Mion is smirking, her lipsyncing is literally only teeth. Unnerving!

Rena has lunch. The Lunch Arc will return in... Lunch 2: Eating Lunch Again!

Keiichi learns that since Hinamizawa is a town of tiny, it’s a town of complete social omniscience. The twerp city boy is scared!!!

Soon there will be a festival called Watanagashi. That’s nice.

The toddlers get summoned. The Lunch Arc is reborn. Here’s how it plays out: -Toddler 01 claims that temples are under the dominion of toddlers -Keiichi attempts to ban Toddler 01 from Temple Land -Mion begins to respect Keiichi -A fiercely competitive race with survival at stake commences -Um... this??? (see image below) -Keiichi eats a ball and no one else is happy about it -Mion desperately attempts to prevent Rena from racking up too many Rena Points. (Once Rena gets too many Rena Points, she gets instantly arrested and/or killed. It’s like that one-page TTRPG, Jason Statham’s Big Vacation, where Jason Statham has four meters: Dead, Sad, Arrested, and Bored. With Rena, Dead and Arrested are consolidated into a single meter, while Sad and Bored are removed entirely.) -Keiichi brings up linguistics -Toddler 01 declares a scary, vaguely intimate Love Battle, with lame crap at stake -Toddler 02 freaking hates vore, so Rena starts bleeding heavily

 Oh, during that Lunch Arc, I also noticed that this whole thing is written in past tense. That’s interesting. That’s... so normal... normal... normal...

Rena puts Keiichi in the garbage. Rena loves garbage, which explains everything about her entire characterization, past present and future. There’s also a visiting muscleman whose personality is Camera. Camera is sad about an armless corpse. Rena is sad about a fake chicken man.

Rena denies the relevance of armless corpses. Only chicken men exist within her world...

Meanwhile, in Side Story Land...

Keiichi lives in a house. He’s normal.

It was an overseer guy, who got killed. Various dudes made him dead.

[kristsune]

While working on the longer posts for this special, I realized just how many times Alex allowed things to happen, and just had to compile them into a single place.

[merelymatt]

Where to find me at Dragonmeet 2022

(Sat 3 Dec, Novotel Hammersmith, London)

10am, Beaujolais, Mezzanine:

Jason Statham's Big Vacation

(Live play organised by The D20 Future Show, as part of the Podcast Zone. I'll be playing one of Jason Statham's entourage, trying to make sure he has a nice holiday and protecting him from the Wesley Sniper. Game designed by Grant Howitt)

4pm, second floor:

Indie Games on the Hour

(No need to book, just turn up a bit before 4 and I'll pitch some games for you to pick from. Likely some combination of galactic 2e by riley rethal, Mission: Accomplished! by Jeff Stormer, Our Haunt by Rae Nedjadi, or Lichcraft by Laurie O'Connell)

For the rest of the day I'll be pootling about, checking in with people I know, going tk seminars, and buying things I don't need in the trade hall...

[big-urchin-energy]

relistening to jason statham's big vacation To Cope while my wifi is down and i will never get over the streatham jokes as long as i live

[nilim]

Bryn just laughing continuously all by himself might be my favourite sound.

[starlightthroughbrokenglass]

I had an idea for an RQG one-shot:

Oscar Wilde’s Big Vacation!

(a hack of Jason Statham’s Big Vacation)

Zolf has promised Wilde a holiday, so that’s what he shall have. The rest of the party tags along. It’s not quite what Zolf had in mind but they all deserve some time off after basically saving the world. The entire party tries to make sure that Wilde has a good time and actually gets to relax for once. But that’s easier said than done. Because Wilde is not only apparently incapable of staying alive for longer than ten minutes, he has also never learnt to relax and is on top of that deeply traumatised.

Their task: trying to keep Wilde from being sad, dead, or doing paperwork.

Their roles: Zolf is the “manager”/life partner who knows Wilde well enough to have all the “Wilde lore”. Azu is the bodyguard because she doesn’t only have the muscle to protect his body but also the heart to protect his emotional state. Hamid is the lawyer because, well, he’s the 🎵 single female lawyer 🎵. And Cel is the tour guide because they’re sure to find fun and distracting activities.

[carlatsukinamistolemyhamsandwich]

I just GMed a short comedy tabletop RPG for my housemates (the game was Jason Statham’s Big Vacation if anyone’s curious) and now some part of my brain is like “you should come up with a DL tabletop RPG, it would be fun”.