#Jadis was EVERYTHING okay

[triaelf9]

Look, some ppl read The Magician's Nephew and saw a battle between good and evil. Some of us read it and saw what the author was saying, but also saw very tall evil lady commanding the people around her and it awakened something in them XD

And then rediscovered whatever that was when Lady Dimitrescu stepped on to screen some 25 years later

tldr oh nooo tall evil fictional lady step on me oops uh oh XD

[arioagio]

Credit : x @seffsaid

[shuksstuff-blog]

Menjubo Madam

Hubungan aku dengan Madam ni mcm pasangan bercinta juga, kadang dia punya moody, letih juga nk melayan pe'el org tua ni, Ada sekali tu terkantoi, aku bawak awek office lunch, dijadikan cerita, naik kereta Audi yg dia belikan utk aku, memang ribut melandalah jawabnya. Aku igtkan dia dh fly ke KK, follow up dgn master payment disana, jadi aku curi2 la ngejas awek office bangunan sebelah, dua tiga kali mcm ada respond, jd bermodalkan Audi, manatau dapat merasa pepek muda. Belum smpat lunch, What App masuk, "I' ll Kill You", 'I know what you do!" dpt msg dr Madam, Ahh sudah, bisik hati aku, apahal pulak org tua ni,.   Selang beberapa minit, call in masuk,. aku swipe reject, nk makan kot. Dia call lg, aku swipe reject lg.

Selesai lunch, plan aku nk memantat dgn awek ni, tak jadi hari ni, kene lah postpone, jd aku trus drive blk office, hantar juga awek office sebelah. Aku melangkah masuk office aku je, Madam berdiri didepan meja aku, smbil tgnnya memeluk tubuhnya yg menampakkan tetek selambak dia tu. "Shut the door!" dgn nada yg tinggi, aku perasan staff2 lain terkejut dgn nada madam, sblm ni dia sorg yg peramah, jarang nk tggikan suara. Aku berjalan ke arah kerusi aku, dan duduk. "What wrong hunny?", nadaku yg rendah niat memujuk madam. "Dont you even 'hunny hunny' with me!, where are you going with that Bitch?!" aku agak terkedu bila madam berbahasakan begitu. Aku pun respond dgn baik, "I dont get it? who is the Bitch? i dont understand madam?". "Well the Bitch you taking to lunch just now!". "I see, are you jealouse with the "bitch" madam? and didnt you know who is the bitch rite now?"

Pertengkaran kami agak lama, cumanya lain staff tak la dgr sgt apa yg kami bertengkar. "I give you everything, anything, then you did this to me?" smbil mengalir airmatanya, suara yg menengkin td, kini dh redha. Aku memegang bahu madam, aku urut2kan supaya lebih tenang. "I know you love me rite?", smbil madam menggangguk tunduk, mukanya masih malu melihat aku. Aku mengaku yg aku ada keluar lunch dgn ex girlfriend aku dlu, walhal bukan pun, awek tu baru aku nk mencuba nasib. "Then what is she so special to you?" balas madam "you already touch all of me rite?". "Dont get mad when im telling you the truth, can you?" tnya aku kepada madam, dia hanya menggangguk saja. "Okay, she gave me all her hole, not only pussy". "Then let me give it to you also!, you want it now?" mencelah madam. Hatiku makin riang apabila umpan utk anal madam berjaya. "If that thing are special, why on earth you want to give rite now?, dont you want to take trip, only with me?" smbil memeluk madam, dia kini mendongan memandang aku, melebarkan senyumannya, dan kiss bibir aku, "i'll booked flight ticket now, we heading tmw". Oh senangnya bisik hati aku

Entah apa si madam ni discuss dgn boss aku, boss aku call, "Tmr, assist madam to Langkawi, this week im still at Bangkok, see you next Monday". belum smpat aku kata okay, dia letak fon. Sesampai saja kami di Airport Langkawi, ada kereta pick up kami terus ke Datai Hotel, dh macam honeymoon dgn madam kali ni di Langkawi, selesai check in, kami berangkat ke Cable Car, melayan la si madam berpimpin tgn, sebelah malamnya pulak, aku hanya bwk madam ke Rasta Hut Chenang, sesambil madam meneguk whiskey, aku dapatkan Weed, sebalut dua di bar, madam pun kian mabuk, aku ajak madam blk bilik.

Sesampai di bilik, madam terlalu horny, dlm lift pun dh meraba btg aku. Dilondehnya seluar aku, madam mencari btg nikmatnya utk diisap. Weed yg aku kena ni boleh tahan dengungnya, btg aku makin mencanak bila diisap rakus oleh madam, madam yg tanpa seurat benang masih hot dan bergetah, aku baringkan madam di katil, lidah aku laju mencari pussy, sesmbil aku memasukkan jari ke lubang jubur madam, masih dara, boss aku mesti tak reti anal. "Ahh, ahh ahh, plss fuck me babe" rayu madam bila pussynya terlalu becak dan stim. Batangku merodok pussy madam, menyentak2 madam dikerjakan aku, madam yg terkulai membiarkan saja aku meratah tubuhnya, seakan akan menurut nafsukunmenghambakan dirinya. Aku meminta madam menonggeng utk doggy, Clup clup clup, pussy madam menerima tujahan dr batang aku, terkemut2 pussy madam, dan akhirnya, aku melumurkan air pussy madam di lubang juburnya, batangku menekan kedalam jubur madam, madam tersentak "ahh, sakit". keluh madam, kian lama sakitnya hilang, rengekkan madam kini lain dari rengek bila pussy nya di tujah, kali ini lebih ganas bunyinya. "Arhg arghh arhgh, it fit baby, arhhh arhhh" moaning dr madam membuatkan aku hilang keruan. Sentakan demi sentakan btg aku, jubur madam semakin longlai, madam hanya akur dia diliwat ganas oleh staffnya, aku memancutkan benihku ke dlm lubang jubur madam, madam terdampar, dan aku menindihnya, batang masih lg dikemut2 oleh jubur madam.. kami berdua tertidur.

Sesedarnya aku, madam masih tidur, mungkin kepenatan, aku mencari stok weed smlm, smbil balut dibalcony, madam dgn shower robe, memeluk aku dr belakang, terasa panas tetek madam dibelakang aku. Madam mencium leher aku, meraba2 badan aku, bila aku pusing mengadap dia, btg aku dh terpacak. "Woaaa, always hard yaa, wait ya i need to take shower first". smbil mencuit btg aku. Madam meluru ke bathroom, punggungnya melentok2 semasa jalan, geram je aku tgk, tak padan dgn berumur, nafsu makcik cina ni masih berdarah muda, mungkin boss aku tak pernah melayan mcm aku, pancut je tido, pancut je tido.. Madam hanya berendam di dlm bathtub, aku berdiri disebelahnya, dicapai btg aku, terus masuk mulut dan hisap. Aksi kami di bathroom berlarutan, btgku hanya mensasar lubang jubur madam, akan tetapi, pussy madam aku rodok dgn jari hingga berlendir, barulah aku mula menujah jubur madam. Nafas madam semakin liar, juburnya tidak lagi mampu menahan tusukan btgku, dn akhirnya madam climax, pussynya memancut2 air dn meleleh di pehanya d keaddan madam berdiri dan menonggeng menahan di basin toilet, kaki madam longlai kesedapan, aku menahan dr madam jatuh, aku smbung fick jubur madam, "Arghh, arghh, arghh, baby cum in me baby" rakus rengekan madam. Aku menghaburkan mani aku lagi ditempat yg bukan sepatuynya.. Madam tak berhenti kemut kesedapan, badan madam berpeluh2 akibat pertarungan kami berdua.

To be continue..

[trips2saturn]

okay guys hahahahahaha i get that rick’s stupid and silly but ummmmmmmm remember that he worships the ground that his wife walks on and loves her to the ends of the earth, further proving that he will protect her throughout everything no matter the circumstances. y’all are getting a bit too serious with saying fuck rick omg he’s going through a shit ton of emotions and he is severely traumatized. get serious before i start throwing things

did he have to say all of that to michonne? NO. i almost experienced a cardiac arrest and became the avatar ready to kill him for michonne. but that was temporary because HELLO… he wasn’t fucking serious people. jadis was right there, what else did you expect him to do. he’s also a dumb himbo, let alone a traumatized one. have some empathy!!!!!! even his wife knew that his words were nothing but shit, THATS WHY SHE DID WHAT SHE DID AT THE END. they need a timeout! 🫶🏼

[threadboundgold]

Thoughts on my AU where Azul ends up unconscious in a hospital tank post-overblot:

Jade as acting housewarden + Floyd as acting Vice while azul is incapacitated

Floyd actually being properly stressed- “everything will be okay~ that’s what jadie says!~” being murmured under his breath constantly while he keeps watch on Azul’s tank

Octavinelle closing ranks around their dorm leadership/Octavinelle sort of shutting out members of other dorms, especially avoiding Savanaclaw students

This leads to things sort of Falling Apart bc Octavinelle is kind of a necessary part of NRC “ecosystem”

Go more in-depth on Physical Toll of post overblot + the Dangers of overblot transformation

[milaalkhansah]

Tidak diperbolehkan untuk menyalin & membagikan segala tulisan di sini tanpa izin atau tanpa menyebutkan credit ⛔

Beli buku "Semua Lelah yang Perlu Kita Rasakan Saat Dewasa" di sini

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Klik untuk mendapatkan Tips dan trik belajar nulis dari aku

Arsip tulisanku:

How writing saves me a lot

Second memory

Kekuatan sebuah tulisan

Marry & love things

It's okay to wait long than to marry wrong

If it's the right time, everything will be easy

A letter for someone I'll call "Mas" in the future 💌

I believe you'll find it

Falling in love at this age feels so heavy

Self awareness

Life taught me a lot

Marriage talk

Kok iso?

Fall in love without any reason

Aku gak perlu bilang sayang

What kind of marriage is that i want

Dear parents, You get what you teach

Pasti ada

Nikah muda atau mati muda?

Pendidikan calon anak

Gentle reminders

Bertahanlah. Setidaknya untuk dirimu sendiri

Berdoa itu gratis

Life lessons

Ujian yang tak kunjung selesai

Berteman dengan kesepian

Belajarlah untuk mati rasa

Everything happens for reasons

Yang lebih berat

I hate being poor

Grieving

Menerima penolakan

Penggugur dosa

Dilema seorang kakak

It's okay to ask for help

Perjalanan menemukan diri sendiri

Ketersediaan telinga

Krisis jati diri

Mengenal batas cukup

Jangan-jangan

Deactivated

Life gets better

Anak

Oh ternyata ini maksudnya...

Pertemanan di usia dewasa

Kita dan duka kita masing-masing

Terima kasih telah jadi orang baik

Rumus bermedia sosial

Mempertanyakan ulang mimpi-mimpi

Menjeda mimpi

Heals journeys

How depression feels like #part1

Aku ingin hidup lebih baik

Relapse

Quotes

Pray in silence

Prosa

Tentang jatuh cinta, patah hati, dan mengikhlaskan

Kalau aku tidak cantik lalu kenapa?

Night

Buku paling rumit

Menuju 23

Tak semua kebaikan perlu dibalas

Gak semua orang harus tau kita lagi kenapa

Ketenangan itu mahal

Less friends less problems

Some people won't stay

We suffer more often in our mind than in reality

Sama manusia secukupnya saja

How to fix our life

Gak semua hal harus kita tau jawabannya sekarang

Be okay with being understood

We never can change people

No need to prove anything

Cerpen

Antara perasaan dan realita

[nukhshine]

Gak Semua yang Dateng ke Kita Itu Tulus, So Stay Sharp!

Aku pernah punya cerita yang sampai sekarang bikin aku mikir panjang soal gimana kita harus respon orang-orang di sekitar kita. Jadi gini, dulu aku pernah ikut seleksi pramugari di salah satu kota. It was one of those big moments yang bikin nervous tapi excited juga. Pesertanya rame banget, and I thought, “Okay, aku bakal coba kasih yang terbaik.”

Nah, pas lagi antri, tiba-tiba ada cewek. She was that girl—cantik banget, tinggi, rapi, pokoknya aura pramugari tuh nempel di dia. Yang aku pikir awalnya dia ramah banget, karena dia nyamperin peserta satu per satu. Ngajak ngobrol, basa-basi, and honestly, it felt nice to be acknowledged gitu kan?

Pas giliran aku disamperin, dia ngenalin diri, senyum lebar, terus mulai cerita soal pengalamannya dulu jadi pramugari “cadangan” pas event Natal dan Tahun Baru. Dia bilang kerjaannya gak enak banget—tidur gak jelas, harus standby bawa koper ke mana-mana, kerja kayak robot, pokoknya sounds miserable. Semakin dia cerita, semakin aku kayak, “Wah, worth gak ya aku lanjut?”

Aku jadi kepikiran. Dia cantik, dia kayaknya paham dunia pramugari lebih dari aku, terus dia cerita gini buat apa? Apakah emang pure dia pengen aku tahu reality check dunia pramugari? Atau… ada agenda lain?

Fast forward ke hasil tes. Aku gagal. It was disappointing, but yaudah, aku berusaha buat ikhlas. Tapi yang bikin aku sadar adalah pas aku tahu dia ternyata lolos seleksi. Di situ aku kayak, “Wait, kok dia bilang kerjaannya dulu gak enak, tapi dia daftar lagi? What’s the point of that sob story?”

Setelah aku telusuri, I realized—some people out there mungkin emang suka kayak gitu. Bukan karena mereka peduli sama kita, tapi karena mereka pengen nge-scare kita off. Kalau kita mundur, ya otomatis saingan mereka berkurang, kan? It’s like playing a psychological game.

So, gimana cara kita merespon orang kayak gitu?

Trust yourself. Kita harus percaya sama apa yang kita bawa. Kalau ada orang yang coba nge-distract atau nakut-nakutin, tanya lagi ke diri kita sendiri: “Apa aku yakin sama tujuanku?” Kalau yakin, gas terus.

Don’t take everything at face value. Kadang, niat seseorang gak sesimple yang mereka tunjukin. Be smart. Jangan langsung percaya sama semua cerita orang. Analyze dulu, apa cerita mereka ngebantu kita, atau malah bikin kita down?

Stay focused on your journey. Hidup ini marathon, bukan sprint. Orang kayak dia emang mungkin ada, tapi kita gak harus terpengaruh. Fokus sama growth journey kita aja, karena semua proses punya waktunya masing-masing.

Dari kejadian itu, aku belajar satu hal besar: bukan semua orang yang keliatannya ramah, itu punya niat baik buat kita. Kadang, senyum lebar itu nyimpan niat lain. But you know what? Kita juga bisa lebih kuat kalau kita belajar buat gak gampang ke-distract.

The world can be tricky, but as long as kita tau tujuan kita, kita bakal selalu punya alasan buat keep going.

[aledisini]

Growing from zero

Buat gue, "mulai dari 0" banget itu Juli 2023.

Pindah unit, to something that completely new for me. Something that I've never touched because I knew I had completely zero knowledge about that. Takut? Oh iya jelas. Bertubi-tubi ditambah gue waktu itu sendirian.

But I think I've managed to pass the hardest start.

After all, kita manusia, yang bertumbuh dari hari ke hari. Menjadi lebih baik dari hari kemarin, supaya tidak jadi orang yang merugi bukan?

My journey to push those boundaries tuh kayak jungkir balik dikocok-kocok. Tapi bikin gue sadar, for the very first time, gue merasa punya tim yang bisa diajak bicara dan diskusi. Gue tau kapabilitas dan pengetahuan gue itu ga sampe seujung kuku kemampuan mereka. But they willing to teach me, and tutor me wkwk. Ofc, bayangin aja gue liat kabel warna warni udah gatau itu apaan. Kabel weh pokona kan. Ini sama peer sama manager gua kalo gua diem bingung dijelasin, nama-nama nya dan terus buat apa. Kalo gue gatau tentang alat-alat kerja kantor gue yang super banyak itu, nanti tuh pas jalan makan siang bakal sengaja dilewatin buat nunjukin ke gue wujud nya kaya apa.

Being with them for the past year ngajarin gue, that it's okay not to know everything, there will always be time and opportunity to learn. They may not the perfect team that everyone had in mind, but those two are the best team I've ever had.

Walaupun ya gue tau, sekarang juga gue masih banyak gatau nya, masih banyak salah nya juga. At least I've tried, hehehe.

With this tumblr notes, I would like to thank myself first for surviving this far, and everyone who has accompanied me growing over the past year. Eak biar agak mellow sedikit kan.

Selamat menyambut hari esok, selamat menyeka khawatir, selamat menyembuhkan duka. Semoga selalu Allah iringi langkah kaki kita semua🤗

[nabakovian]

okay also i wanted to elaborate a bit more on that joke i made earlier on jadie's @20thcenturystarlet post because i really do think there's so much narrative analogy between ethel cain & dolores haze & laura palmer. like yes they were all sexually abused by father figures but even that is the least of it because what all of these stories explore so beautifully is the experience in girlhood of being consumed and made invisible. laura is everywhere & nowhere in twin peaks. she is the centerpiece she is in everything she is the reason for it all and yet her memory is devoured by the narrative. she is omnipresent and no one can ignore her presence but at the same time she isn't there. dolores is solipsized almost entirely by humbert's perspective yet throughout the whole narrative you can see claw marks where she's tried to climb into the light, where she's become visible for just a moment before the beast (humbert, but, more aptly, humbert's narrative) swallows her again and conceals her true image from the reader. and ethel, literally consumed and cannibalized, but also consumed in a way by her father's memory. i'm tired of you still tied to me. doing all of the things that you do. GOD.

[wrenreid]

Off Limits

contains: mentions of alcohol, angst, talk of virginity

Chapter Twenty-One

As much as I want to stay at this party to prove to Spencer (or really myself) that I’m fine after all that just happened, I leave pretty quickly after he does.

The uber drops me off at my dad’s apartment, well I guess it’s mine too now, and I try to get in as quietly as I possibly can. My efforts are quickly seen to be pointless when I nearly scream from shock at the sight of my father on the couch, mug in hand, laptop on his lap.

“Shit, Dad,” I breathe, holding my heart dramatically from the adrenaline of the shock.

“You’re really good at greeting people,” he jokes, but there’s no smile on his face or even in his eyes.

I lock the door and hang up my keys on the hook before slipping out of my shoes and leaving them by the door to be taken care of later.

“Everything okay?” I ask as I sit down next to him.

It’s well past midnight and the bags under his eyes are more prominent than before, so I already know the answer, and he knows that.

But he lies anyway. It must be instinct for him. “Yeah,” he nods, patting my knee for a second.

“Dad,” I raise my eyebrows giving him a look that lets him know I don’t want to hear his bullshit.

“You look just like your mother when you’re upset with me,” he says with a slight, unamused chuckle.

I frown, leaning my head on his shoulder. “I may be your kid, but I’m also an adult. You can talk to me.”

He rests his head on top of mine, kissing my temple like he used to do when I was young. “It’s just case work, bug. Nothing you need to worry about.”

Bug. He hasn’t called me that in years, maybe even a decade. When I was little, Mom would call be Jadie Bug which I pretended to hate because I did not want to be compared to a stink bug. My dad shortened it to just bug. Which I wasn’t too fond of but secretly loved.

“If you say so,” I sigh, not leaving his side. “You really should sleep. It’s not healthy to be up this late staring at a computer screen.”

“But it’s healthy to be up this late drinking?” His tone isn’t judgmental, just observant.

“My young body and mind is built for late nights. Yours, however, is not.”

“Are you calling me old?” A real chuckle releases from him.

“If the shoe fits, grandpa.”

“Ah. I better not be a grandpa anytime soon,” he grimaces.

“At this rate in my love life and school career, Jack will be the first of us to have kids.”

My dad smiles, ruffling my hair. “Good. You’re going to make an awesome lawyer, and although kids are amazing, I want you to focus on your career.”

“Trust me, Dad. I am,” I say with a slight grin.

It’s not like I’m ever going to move past second base with anyone at this point. Spencer pops into my head, and honestly, it just pisses me off.

“Do you regret having me so young?” I ask.

My father looks at me a little hurt. “Of course not. Having a baby made it hard to go to university, but I don’t regret having you at all. Neither did Haley.”

I nod, a faint smile on my face. “Get some sleep.” I kiss my father’s cheek quickly before getting off the couch and heading up to my room.

—

I honestly can’t believe that just happened. But I’m laying in bed with an anxiety and guilt ridden stomach ache with Jade not here, so it definitely did.

God, her face when she asked “What’s wrong with me?” Sent a dagger through my heart. She looked so hurt, confused.

And I did that. I never wanted to do that to anyone, especially not her. She’s Jade. She’s a precious gemstone. A perfect flower that needs to remain unplucked in order to continue to flourish. And she’s by boss’s daughter.

Every muscle in my body was screaming at me to turn around and not walk out of that house, but she wasn’t to be argued with. Her mind was set on her staying and me leaving. So I did.

I feel like such a fucking jackass. Not only did she think that somehow this is her fault, but I also can’t even begin to explain this whole situation to myself, let alone to her.

Every self righteous, carefully thought out bone in my body tells me that I can’t give into temptation. I can’t give into her.

I don’t know how to describe it. It’s like there’s always been that voice inside my head that yells at me when I even think something wrong. I’m a genius. A prodigy. Everything I do is supposed to be perfect. There’s no possible way that I could be what she needs, so I can’t ruin her.

I don’t call her until after the sun comes home. I’m hoping she got some rest. I don’t want to bother her because I know she’s upset, but I want to know she made it home okay.

She doesn’t answer. But at least the phone rings all four times, so at least she’s not declining my call. After the beep, I say, “Hey. I know you don’t want to talk after last night, but I wanted to know if you’re okay. Call me back… if you want to. Um, that’s all. Bye.”

I’d like to think she’s still asleep and that’s why she didn’t pick up, but I’m very aware of the possibility that she just didn’t want to talk to me. It’s understandable. I just wish I could fix this.

As much as I would rather focus on Jade right now, it’s pointless to dwell on last night when she won’t even talk to me. I also have work. Probably, hopefully, not a case. It should just be paperwork.

—

I would tease him for leaving a voicemail instead of texting like a normal twenty-something year old, but I’m not in the mood for teasing. I’m not in the mood to text him that I’m okay, and I’m definitely not in the mood to call him back.

I can’t be mad at him for not wanting to sleep with me, and I’m really not. I don’t really know what I’m feeling, but I do know that mad isn’t even close. I’m more so disappointed, I guess. Disappointed in the whole situation and in myself for getting drunk and practically begging him to fuck me. Which now that I’m really thinking about it is so wrong and embarrassing that I want to curl up in a hole and live there until I’m food for the worms to eat.

I know I was pretty drunk, but that doesn’t keep the embarrassment and recoil from twisting in my stomach. I think if 17 year old me had witnessed last night, she’d want to smother me with my pillow. Hell, I now want to smother myself with my pillow.

Even though I’m disgusted, embarrassed, and upset from last night, I still think he deserves the right to know I didn’t pass out in a pool of my own vomit at the party. Or worse.

So I text Spencer.

“I made it home fine. No need to worry.”

He’s at work, so I know he won’t see the message for a while.

Instead of beating myself up over last night, I put my energy into making Jack and myself breakfast.

“I’m glad to hear that. I know you probably, definitely, don’t want to talk to me… but can we please talk later?”

I sigh as I read the message on my phone.

“Bad news?” Jack asks like he’s some type of grown man reading my facial expressions.

“No,” I laugh softly, ruffling his hair. “Just a friend asking a favor.”

“What’s a favor?”

“It’s like when someone asks you to do something for them. Like if I were to ask you to put my plate in the sink.”

“Why would I do that?” He asks.

“Because I’m your big sister, and you love me.”

The kid shrugs and takes both of our plates to the sink. He can’t reach the faucet yet, but the effort is appreciated.

“Do you want to go out with us? I promised Jack I’d take him to Mr. Gatti’s tonight for pizza and games,” my father asks me when he’s home.

“Unfortunately, I will have to skip out on the stomach-destroying food and thousands of children running around,” I tell him.

“On the account of?”

“On the account of my sanity.”

He laughs, shrugging in understanding. “Want money to order out?”

“I would never turn down money, Dad.”

After an hour or so, my dad and brother leave to go to dinner. Knowing how much of a sucker my father is for the puppy dog eyes Jack has mastered the art of, thanks to me, they’ll be gone for at least two and a half hours.

There’s a knock on the front door, and I get up to answer it.

“Oh-” I’m a little shocked to see Spencer at my door. “I forgot to respond to your message, sorry.”

I’m not sure why I’m apologizing for that, but here I am.

“It’s okay. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. That um…”

I know what he’s going to say. “That we’re okay.” But are we?

“I’m okay, Spencer,” I tell him, nodding.

“I’m really sorry,” he says.

He’s the first to say it. Once again, I’m fucking stubborn.

“Yeah. Me too,” I say, not looking him in the eyes.

“You don’t have any-“

“Yes I do, Spencer. I really do.” I run my hands through my hair with a sigh. “Who the hell freaks out over someone not sleeping with them? I feel like some cocky frat boy.”

Spencer smiles softly, his dimples catching my attention. “You’re a lot prettier than a cocky frat boy. And smarter.”

“Not the point. I’m sorry for last night. For being a drunken idiot,” I tell him.

“I wasn’t exactly the smartest either. I’m sorry for making you feel shitty.”

I let him into the apartment, plopping down on the arm of the couch as he stays standing. “I never said I felt shitty,” I say, trying to make myself seem cooler and as if he doesn’t have an affect over me. But he gives me a look. “I hate you profilers so much.”

“Can we just move past this?” He asks, his hazel eyes filled with a bit of hope.

“I want to, Spencer. But I can’t help but think that this is because of me,” I tell him.

“Jade,” he sighs, his bottom lip drawn between his teeth.

“Just forget it,” I say, not wanting to put in the effort for this conversation.

“No,” he says. “You’re right. I just… I don’t know how to explain it without sounding-” Spencer stops talking. “It’s just that it would just seem weird because you’re a…”

Oh my god, he can’t even say it. I’m about to die of embarrassment. And anger.

“You said it wasn’t about me! If there’s something wrong with me, just fucking say it, Spencer.”

“You’re a virgin!”

I knew that’s what he was going to say, but it still stings.

“You don’t want me because I haven’t had sex before? That’s all kinds of fucked up, Spencer.”

“It’s not that… I- I can’t be your first. It would be so disappointing.”

My face contorts with confusion. Is he bullshitting me? “You’re worried about your performance?”

“No, Jade. I’m worried about not being what you expect,” he says, an expression I can’t quite read written all over his face. “I’m not what you need.”

“I don’t…” I take a breath, not even sure what the hell to say. “I don’t need anyone, Spencer. You’re right, you’re not what I need.”

His eyebrows pinch together and raise at the same time. He’s hurt. I can read that.

“Oh. Right,” he says. “I’m sorry I showed up unannounced.”

“Wait, Spencer. That sort of came out wrong. I don’t need you. But I want you. I’ve wanted you for fucking years. I never thought I’d have a chance, so this… It’s all just been so much. But if you actually like me, then I’m okay with taking it slow. It’s probably for the best anyway.”

A small smile creeps up onto his face. “Are you serious?”

“Law school hasn’t taught me to be good at lying yet,” I joke. “You don’t have to feel like you’re not good enough or whatever the hell you’re thinking in that confusing brain of yours. And I don’t care if us being together is technically wrong. I don’t give a fuck what’s wrong because I want you.”

Spencer offers his hand out to me, and I let him pull me up to my feet. His hands hold my hips as he looks down at me.

“So are we good?” I ask, biting my lip.

“We’re more than good,” he smiles, pulling me closer. “I want you too. And I want to do this whole thing right. So no sex yet.”

“If that’s what you want,” I nod, my hands rubbing his shoulders.

“But that doesn’t mean we can’t do other stuff whenever you’re comfortable with it,” Spencer says, leaning down to kiss me.

I return the gentle kiss before pulling away. “Like what?”

“Like things that seem too inappropriate to say out loud in a living room where I can see toys,” he says with a slight laugh.

I still hold onto him but turn around. “Right. I need to clean up.”

“Not right now I hope,” Spencer says with his puppy dog eyes.

“Nah, not right now. We have another hour-ish to make out in my room if you want,” I suggest with a hopeful grin.

“Yes please,” he nods, messy hair falling into his face.

tags: @pauline5525mgg @theintimatewriter @lilibet261 @greysviolets @jazzymariexoxoc @one-sweet-gubler @thatsonezesty13 @necromaniackat @awhoreforspencerreid @sebs-oxygen @scarredelirium @bts-sugaplum @awesomeness1679 @preciousbabypeter @yazzyu @cynbx @r3idsp3ncer @1010lizz @tiredbut-here @skulzombiw @lena-1895 @eevee0722 @shakespear-picaso-lovechild @daydreamingqueen1 @regulus-black-223048 @virginmusicloverr36 @jazzerbelle14 @kylakins88 @f-me-reid @lovejules888 @marimorena06 @daph-421 @idkusername8787

[lorenanindiaa]

Dunia ini memang sudah di setting sedemikian rupa sama Allah. Diantara kita ada yang ditakdirkan jadi puncak, ada yang cuma jadi figuran, bahkan ada yang nggak dapat peran sama sekali. Emang udah settingan porsinya gitu. Tapi, kita tetap tokoh utama dalam kehidupan kita. Kita hanya sedang menjalani takdir yang telah digariskan untuk kita. Everything will be okay kok.

[tosweetiee]

You, me, and us.

let me tell you how much i love him. he is sunsets and tired eyes and messy hair and ripped jeans and late night laughter and spilt coffee and the smell before it rains  and sleepless nights and bad 90s movies and new music and poetry and whispers at 4 a.m. and ice cream and denim and no destination drives and sunday morning. he my moon, my universe, my love, my sun, my lovetaker, my world, and he is everything lovely. i love you so much that words cannot begin to describe it. i want to spend all of eternity with you and never leave your side. there are three things in this world that will always remain a constant: the sun will rise, the wind will blow, and i will love you. you are like a ray of light in dark places. whenever things get rough and i lost all hope, you appear out of no where and save me from destruction. you're truly my savior, my hero, my prince charming ... my everything. i want to grow old with you. not just mature, i mean REALLY grow old. i never want to lose you, cs you are the love of my life.

okay next! CAN I JUST SAY SMTHNG CRAZY ABOUT U? i want to tell u something! do you know? how lucky i am to have u. IM SO HAPPY AND VERY VERY LUCKY. aku udah pernah cerita ke kakak sebelumnya aku tiap deket sama cowo pasti berakhir jelek, sampe aku takut buat mulai hubungan lagi sama cowo lain. tapi, setelah kakak datang ke hidup aku, aku ngerasa bener bener dicinta banget sama kakak. selama aku main rp, baru kali ini nemu yang cintanya setara bukan yang salah satu doang excited nya. sebelum ketemu kakak tuh, aku ngerasa hidup aku kaya ada yang kurang gitu, setelah kakak datang ke hidup aku malah idup aku jadi lebih berwarna pas ada kakak 😵‍💫 MY KINDA love only for u! aku sayang bangettt sama kakakk! kalau kakak gamau percaya juga gapapa. but, tolong kasih aku harapan ya? harapan buat nanti kita berdua bisa bersama untuk selamanya hehe ૮ ˙Ⱉ˙ ა kakak, kalau nanti kita udah ga sama sama lagi, aku harap kakak jangan pernah lupa sama aku ya? aku gapernah nyesel pernah ketemu sama kakak di kehidupan ini. u ARE my woOrld 🌎🤍 IM REALY EXCITED for this! kalau ada yang jahat sama kakak, kasi tau aku ya? nanti aku tonjok orang nya hehee. 🤏🏻

live, laugh, love, Asterius.

kakak dengerin lagu ini deh, ini lagu favorite aku. masukin ke playlist kakak biar kakak ga denger dj sama dangdut terus 🤏🏻

denger ini jugaa! kalo kata Taylor Swift “ In a world of boys, he's a gentleman ”, Daniel Caesar bilang “ If life is a movie, oh you're the best part ”.

AKU BINGUNG MAU NGETIK APALAGIII.

kakak choose ini ajaa 👇🏻

[cahayaandalusi]

A letter to you, Mas - A Closure

Mas, never have I thought I will tell you this. HAHAH jangan ketawa ya, but I need you to know, I need a closure. One sided closure that's okay.

On this letter I will tell everything about you and when one day you read this one (I have no idea tho whether you will read this or not, but I know you have Tumblr right? So, hopefully you read this, but once you read this, hopefully I am done with my feelings towards you) heheh.

yes, aku gatau harus ceritanya dari mana. Entah kapan tepatnya, tapi saat di Inggris Mas, aku pernah menyemogaknamu sebegitu rupa. Coba cari di Tumblr ini, sempat ada aku nulis aku meminta sesuatu sebagaimana aku meminta permen pada Allah. Mas, yes, I ever asked you brutally to Allah. Aku nangis-nangis Mas saat itu. Tau ga rasanya? Aku selalu menunggu pertemuan dengan Allah saat sholat, karena I want to tell Allah about you. Nyesek banget tiap cerita sama Allah, tapi aku selalu plong setelahnya. Padahal saat itu? I have no feeling towards you. But I see you as a man I am looking for.

Aku suka cerita tentang mu pada Allah Mas, saat aku di Inggris.

Lalu kau mengira aku menyukai yang lain? Ya, memang, karena waktu itu interaksi kita ga banyak kan? Sedang saat itu aku selalu keluar sama aku yakin kamu tau siapa orangnya. Tapi Mas, aku tidak menemukan sosok yang aku cari pada dia.

2021 berlalu, 2022 aku lupa bagaimana, tapi yang jelas kita masih acapkali terhubung, tapi jarang. Ada mbak-mbak yang menyukaimu kan? Sebut saja mbak Y. Dan kamu saat itu bilang kamu belum siap menikah. Aku gapapa Mas. Aku mau lo nunggu kamu saat itu.

2022 aku akhirnya sadar ternyata aku maunya kamu Mas, aku nyarinya kamu. Bukan orang yang aku kira selama ini aku cari. 2022 juga beberapa orang mengajakku menikah, tapi aku tidak menemukan chemistry bersamanya, bukan dia yang kucari mas.

Saat 2022 juga, aku acap kali memulai obrolan terlebih dulu dengan membalas storymu di WhatsApp, tapi dulu tidak kamu balas Mas hahah sedih amet

Later I know, ternyata saat itu kamu sedang dekat dengan mbak-mbak, eh adik kelasmu ding, boleh sebut nama ga nih? nanti makin jelas orangnya? Orang yang kamu pernah foto berdua dengannya Mas. Saat kamu kirim foto itu, aku nangis sih. Kayak, oh Masnya maunya yang kayak gini? Hemm~ Tau ga? Aku udah tau mbak itu jauh sebelum Mas kirim fotonya ke aku. hahahah

Tapi, aku jadi agak baik baik aja saat tau mbaknya ternyata udah punya pacar hehee. Aku follow dia mas di Instagram yang bahkan kamu gatau.

Trus, kita semakin sering ngobrol. Mas, kamu adalah apa-apa yang aku cari loh. Bisa bisanya kamu nyuruh aku menemukan orang lain, sedang yang kumau adalah kamu. Saat aku bilang "gamau nikah sama aku apa?" itu aku beneran lo Mas, ga bercanda. tapi kamu bilangnya, "takut diseruduk". Hehehe aku cukup tau diri Mas.

Iya ya, aku banyak api dan badainya, apalagi dengan keluargaku yang kayak gini. hehehe

Lalu, beberapa bulan lalu kamu mengirim screenshot closefriendmu, tau ga? Ku check satu satu semua instagram itu, termasuk instagramnya si mbak-mbak yang akan aku ceritakan setelah ini haha.

oke, kita sebut Mbak X ya. Jadi, saat aku liat instagram mbak ini, aku kaget bukan main. Kenapa? Aku seperti melihat aku dalam dirinya mas. Story"nya, cita"nya, bahkan fyp instagramnya kayaknya sama. Aku menemukan energiku dalam diri mbaknya, dan aku tau mbaknya suka kamu Mas. Tapi yang bikin aku insekyur, dia satu jurusan ya denganmu? Dan sialnya, dia punya pekerjaan yang sama denganmu ya? Pasti obrolan kalian jauh lebih nyambung kan? Sepertinya juga dia lebih dewasa dariku ya Mas? Sesuatu yang kamu cari dari seorang perempuan kan?

I am happy sih kalau kamu akhirnya nanti menemukan dia. Maaf ya Mas, ternyata aku gabisa menjadi apa yang kamu mau.

Aku mau bilang makasih atas banyak hal yang udah kamu lakukan. Mas, aku punya thread di Twitter dan story Instragram yang ga ada satu orangpun yang tau yang isinya adalah kamu. Setiap detil perasaanku padamu, kurapikan seluruhnya di situ. I really want you to know that I love you that much Mas. Aku menyimpan banyak kenangan di sana perihalmu. Bahkan suaramu :)) MAAF YA AKU NAKAL!

Mas, makasih ya udah membuatku merasa aku mendapat princess treatment darimu. Selama ini mas, tiap aku main, selalu aku yg akan maksa bayar, tapi saat bersamamu, aku gapernah punya celah untuk itu. How gentleman you are! sampaikan salam sama mama dong, terima kasih sudah mendidik anak laki laki menjadi sebaik kamu. Later when I have a son, I will raise him the way your mom raise you.

Mas, makasih udah menjadikanku tempat kamu ngeluh ya waktu itu. I am happy lo Mas. Happy banget hehehe. Makasih banyak. Makasih udah baik banget sama aku. Udah nerima aku jadi temen. Udah jadi rumah buat aku. Udah membuatku merasa aku punya temen :')

Mas ga salah kok. Aku yang salah. Aku yang lemah sama semua perlakuanmu padahal kamu ga menjanjikan apa-apa. Padahal kamu udah pernah bilang cuma cari casual friends dan ga akan ada rencana menikah dalam waktu dekat.

beberapa hari lalu, aku minta closure sama Allah. Aku minta dikasih petunjuk apakah sebenernya ujung jalan ini adalah titik yang satu atau bukan. Dan hari ini, Allah kasih closure kok. Kamu bikin story hasil ss an mbak X. Lalu, Mbak x merepost storymu :)) Bahkan, beberapa hari lalu yang mbak X screenshot chatmu di ig, aku tau itu gaya bahasamu mas. hafal banget. padahal fotonya udah Mbaknya tutup.

Sekali lagi, aku Mas yang salah karena udah menganggapmu rumah padahal kamu cuma nganggep aku kawan. Kamu pernah bilang padahal, kamu nyari casual friend, bodohnya aku masih ngarep bahwa kamu bisa melihatku sebagi sesuatu yang lain.

hahah gapapa Mas, you are now the standard. Mas, aku sedih banget. Tapi aku gamau aku terus terusan berada pada perasaan yang aku gatau ujungnya apa.

Ga ada aku kan Mas dalam rencana masa depanmu?

Mas, maaf ya Mas kalau aku malah membuat pertemanan ini hancur dan ga nyaman. Tapi gapapa Mas, kalau Mas mau benci aku, benci aja gapapa Mas. Mas mau ngebenci aku the way Mas sebel sama Mbak Y, aku gapapa. But I promise I will never hate you. Never will I hate you!

Aku gatau Mas, harus menemukan orang yang seperti mu di mana. Mas, perasaanku habis di kamu.

Aku capek Mas.

Mas, aku nangis :') banget. Mas, akutu garela menyudahi perasaan padamu. tapi aku gamau bodo haha bahkan aku masih ada perasaan ga rela mas kalau ga sama kamu, tapi kok aku egois kwkw engga kok Mas, bebas, silahkan. Kalau Mas abis baca ini lalu Mas mau langsung block aku gapapa.

Oh terakhir, dulu aku pernah mikir, aku sama kamu tuh, aku berasa menemukan temen kerja kelompok. Bahkan aku sangat sangat mau tetep bekerja. Ga harus ketemu di tengah kan? it's sometime 70:30, or 40:60? Mas, dulu pernah update story yang ada istirnya nyetir dan suaminya duduk duduk aja? Pengen kubales saat itu juga, aku ya juga bisaaa! Tapi, aku menemukan energiku di Mbak X kok Mas. Mungkin that's easier for you bersamanya. gapapa.

Mas, janji sama aku buat ga nyerah untuk ngejar mimpimu ya, aku juga kok! janji sama aku buat ga nyerah sama apa apa yang pernah kamu perjuangkan. Mas, jangan pernah ngerasa kecil dan ga mampu berbuat banyak ya, you have so much potential Mas! I wanna see you success in the future. KAMU HARUS BAHAGIA POKOKNYA MAS!

Mas, I thought it was you. Tapi aku salah lagi hahaha maaf. hehehhe selamat melanjutkan hidup Mas! Kalau mas mau benci aku, gapapa hehehe. Mau kecewa sama aku gapapa.

Mas, makasih udah jadi rumah buat ku. Tapi aku tau, mungkin memang bukan kamu tujunya. Makasih ya.

Oh btw, dulu alasanku balik ke Jember karena di Jember masih ada kamu. Sekarang, I will maybe stay forever in Bandung. Or other cities.

Bandung, 13 Juli 2023

I will pin this post Mas, until one day I finish with my feeling towards you. :)

it's either I will force you to read this, or you will accidentally read this. :))

A second thought, I will just let it be. I won’t force you. But I will just put boundaries towards you, Mas!

BUT KALAU TERLANJUR BACA INI YAUDAH GAPAPA!

Revisited on 14 of July 2023:

After writing all this and considering should I tell you or not, my feelings to you just… so so… I mean, I know since day one it’s not the feeling of butterflying whatsoever the way highschoolers do, it’s just I found home with you 🥲😔

But maybe… it’s not you the final destination and I am doing okay, I will do good kok Mas! Thank youuuuu 🥹

I will just act like nothing happens, but I will try to keep distance and set boundaries to you until I just feel okay without you 😔💔 but can I?

[plasterdrain]

i hope our paths cross again.

wonbin janji waktu itu jika lain waktu mereka bertemu lagi, wonbin juga janji di malam perpisahan sekolah waktu itu ia tidak akan melupakan sungchan sampai tua nanti, meski harus berpisah di malam dengan judul yang sama. wonbin harap mereka berdua tetap bertemu lagi dengan jalan yang berbeda dan akhirnya bersinggungan di perempatan hingga akhirnya bertemu lagi. sungchan juga janji kalau wonbin sebagai teman dan seumur hidupnya ia akan terus mengingat wonbin.

kalau saja waktu itu mulutnya tidak diam dan mengatakan segalanya pada sungchan, mungkin malam ini ia akan lebih baik. wonbin tetap lebih baik dengan apapun yang terjadi, mau bagaimana pria itu memilih bahagianya sendirian dan tanpa wonbin pun, wonbin mengerti. semuanya belum telat untuk merasakannya lagi.

"kenapa nggak sama yang lain?" yang dipikirkan orangnya datang juga. mengapa sungchan harus tahu keberadaannya di sini sih.

"ketemu juga..."

"aku udah perhatiin kamu dari kamu datang tadi. kenapa?"

"nggakpapa, kita ketemu lagi. kamu apa kabar?" masih sendiri? belum berani jadi pertanyaan wonbin malam ini, mengingat di waktu yang sama ia tidak mengatakan perasaannya.

"haha iya, akhirnya bertemu lagi, baik, kamu gimana? baik-baik juga?"

"baik." wonbin tidak percaya diri juga dengan jawabannya, apakah ia baik-baik saja, atau karena ada sungchan ia harus berlaga baik-baik saja.

"kenapa?"

"aku jawab baik, kok kamu tanya kenapa?" decak wonbin menatap lawan bicaranya yang kini tetap lebih tinggi darinya, sungchan tidak berubah hanya menambah minus di kaca matanya saja, lalu rahang yang lebih tegas, dan sekarang pria itu lebih rapi memakai kemeja ketimbang pas sekolah dulu. "kamu beda dari malam kelulusan waktu itu."

"oh ya?" sungchan masih sama, "malah kamu yang tetap sama."

"apanya."

"terakhir aku lihat di malam itu dan sekarang, kamu masih sama terlihat lebih baik. aku nggak tahu harus ngomong apa, wonbin, tapi aku kangen kita."

you don't have to say you will miss us in every sentence, sungchan. harus apa kalau sudah seperti ini, mereka sekarang sudah bukan anak kecil lagi.

"kamu datang sendirian?" tanya sungchan.

"iya."

"aku juga sendirian." maksudnya... pikiran wonbin kosong sekarang, sibuk menatap langit dengan sama seperti sepuluh tahun lalu dan sungchan di sampingnya lagi. kali ini berbeda, mungkin malam ini mereka tidak perlu berpisah seperti waktu itu lagi, tapi itu urusan mereka berdua. tidak ada yang tahu juga.

"i miss your baked muffins and cookies, sepuluh tahun nggak makan masakan kamu, rasanya beda aku udah kebiasaan makan masakan kamu waktu sma dulu. and how's everything?"

"good, aku pulang dua tahun lalu, buka florist and cafe, you should come."

"two years? i should've meet you soon, wonbin." dengus sungchan, bagaimana bisa waktu berjalan secepat ini. "florist?"

"ya, ada winter, yang mengurus juga."

"i miss you so much, wonbin."

"i know."

"i divorced."

"what?!"

"that's the reason why i came here alone, i just got divorced, i am okay, right now. you know business marriage is a thing, right? jadi malam pesta kelulusan seminggu kemudian aku dijodohin, i should tell you sooner, tapi kita nggak pernah ngomong lagi, kamu sibuk, aku juga sibuk kuliah dan kerjaan. setelah lulus mesti ngurus rumah tangga. we're okay now, setelah pisah demi kebaikan aku dan dia juga."

"did you guys have—"

"iya, aku udah punya anak. newsflash for you." bahkan sungchan masih bisa tersenyum manis dengan apa yang dirasakan dirinya selama sepuluh tahun belakangan.

"oh my god, you really are an adult and growing up, right now."

"she's four-year old, this year. she's getting big, nggak kerasa udah besar, dan kita makin tua juga."

"everything's changed." sekali lagi harapan wonbin waktu itu kala mereka bertemu lagi dan menceritakan segala hal yang telah dilakukan, jika semesta menginginkan mereka bertemu tentunya. semuanya berubah dan sungchan pun juga.

i would take every chance to have our paths crossed again, wonbin, i will miss you.

"i am so lost, everything is so different now, you have a child, sungchan. you are a father now, i am so proud of you..." pelukan hangat yang wonbin rindukan, begitu erat dan hangat, bahkan wangi sungchan masih sama saat mereka sma, mengapa mengingat masa lalu buat wonbin sedih. padahal mereka akhirnya bertemu lagi.

"i miss you like crazy, wonbin. thank you for being here, i miss you."

"i miss you too, i am so sorry for leaving you alone, i should be there with you when everything's happened, i should've been there for you like you did to mine, i am sorry."

"it's okay, aku baik-baik saja sekarang, tapi aku kangen kamu." rindu, sungchan rindu wonbin yang rasanya ingin mati saja saat itu juga, beban di dadanya seakan berkurang begitu wonbin memeluknya dengan hangat, mengapa tidak dari awal mereka berpelukan hangat seperti ini, mengapa harus malam ini, setidaknya sungchan tidak perlu rindu sendirian lagi. ada wonbin yang memeluknya.

"kamu kebanyakan bilang kangen, jung."

"please call me that again, i miss it already."

"okay."

"aku antar kamu pulang ya?"

"or have a drink with me, please?"

"sure."

[trips2saturn]

TOWL SPOILERS BELOW!!!!!!

enough time has passed and i’m impatient so here it is. episode two debriefing! ❤️‍🔥

danai and andy’s chemistry is unparalleled and has never been executed so well before by any other actors. their words, emotions, and energy into bringing these characters to life in such a tender way is something absolutely so enigmatic and goshshfgshdhsn i just love them. i love their dynamic and their power to create such an immaculate foundation that will always be such a memorable piece for all of us as fans of this franchise. 🫶🏼

michonne and nat deserved more time. point blank period. i sobbed violently and had to pause the episode for ten minutes. i loved his dynamic with michonne and how much impact his character had in under 40 minutes of screen time. missing him forever and ever. and not to be an asshole but their relationship is what the dude-bros wanted rick and okafor’s association to be ! tell me i’m wrong.

dana from a group of 40 people with her sister el. yaaaas go girl! she’s a b your honor please believe her!!! she’s totally not a badass powerhouse wife and mother of two who’s experienced more in her life than the crm ever have!!!

it’s FUCK the crm forever actually. CHLORINE GAS? killing the pregnant lady and her boyfriend???? im distraught. the most disgusting group of people to ever exist apart from the saviors. hoping to see their entire base burn to the ground by the end of this series !!!! <3

RICHONNE REUNITING AFTER CHOOSING TO GIVE UP HOPE TO FIND EACH OTHER 😭😭😭 the universe loves them soooo much they’re like this 🤞 when it comes to fate. i am still actively emotional over all of their scenes. they’re sooo in love with each other it hurts. i’m still on cloud nine just from seeing them kiss (and moan omg!) so excuse me. ❤️‍🩹

michonne cradling rick’s face and rick nuzzling into her hands? THAT IS HER BABY POOKIE SUGAR PLUM CRISP. keep them together! they cannot be separated!

jadis can die with all due disrespect. she ruined everything. it’s been her fault since the start. she separated them. she’s the reason that rj doesn’t know his father and only knows of his legendary stories. fuck her. d*e!

rick asking about jude multiple times :((( his baby. bring him home to his kids PLEASE. must’ve been such a shocker to hear him ask about his daughter and not daryl or negan oh no! abused, kidnapped father finds the love of his life and wants to make sure that their daughter is still okay after being away from her for a decade! SHOCKER! WOW. this is shocking news! 🙀

the scenes of michonne and nat having to rebuild their health after the chlorine gas bomb was so heartbreaking but powerful. michonne working out and continuing to push herself by being reminded of her strength, grief, and love. she is so strong and i’m so proud of her. i hate the crm.

“shoto? shoto?” PUNCHING ME IN THE GUT WOULD HURT LESS. meanwhile judith is also trying to reach out but their signal is too far gone for them to do so. 😭 pleaseeee i just need one future scene of them reuniting. michonne loves them so much she is the best mother ever. ❤️‍🩹

okay!!!!! that’s all that i have for now. still collecting my thoughts after this episode but i love my tv parents more than life. so happy to have them back and i can’t wait for the next four episodes!!!!!!!

[andianiekaaa]

Ghosting :(

Jadi pelajaran banget sih bagiku. Aku yang tidak pernah menjalin relationship dengan seseorang, namun pernah dekat dan saling mengenal dengan orang-orang tertentu yang bisa aku pilah siapa yang bisa jauh lebih dekat dengan ku. bukan sekadar teman yang say hallo doang ketika berpapasan. 

Aku menyadari betul bahwa people come and go, dan itu benar nyata adanya. seharusnya itu telah menjadi hal wajar bagi kita, tidak perlu kecewa berlebihan, ada beberapa kemungkinan jika mereka hendak pergi dari hidup kita, bisa saja mereka bosan, menemukan hal buruk dalam diri kita, atau menemukan seorang pengganti yang lebih menarik baginya. 

saat hal itu terjadi, aku langsung ambil presepsi positifnya, langsung ambil kendali dalam pikiran, dan tidak berlama-lama berada dalam dugaan atau pikiran yang diluar kendali ku. 

Mungkin kita memang menyayangkan sekali, mengapa seseorang itu pergi padalah kita udah merasa srek sama dia, atau mengapa orang itu tiba-tiba menghilang padahal sebelumnya gak terjadi apa-apa. Namun ketahuilah bahwasannhya itu bukan urusan kita, yang perlu kita pertahankan adalah respon dan sikap baik kita. 

kita harus tetap berada pada jalur dimana ada dia ya syukur kalau pun gada ya juga gapapa. it’s okay and everything will be fine. Kalau kita udah merasa cukup dengan diri sendiri, sudah merasa bahagia meskipun cuma sendirian, bisa menemukan hal yang menyenangkan sendirian, maka kedatangan orang lain dalam hidup kita hanyalah sebagai pelengkap, jadi ketika mereka pergi kita tidak merasa kekurangan dan kehilangan sedikit pun.