#JUST LET ME BE CHRONICALLY ONLINE DAMMIT
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once i get out of my shift (hour & 5 mins) im gonna start self insert posting please forgive me
#today was so exhausting#8 hour shift… one 10 min break bc i havent had the time to take the other…#had to push carts for 90 minutes#still have to go home and do my night routine… sigh#JUST LET ME BE CHRONICALLY ONLINE DAMMIT
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REPOST, ignore this if you read chapter 4!
(because this just fucking in besties, copying FROM tumblr online and pasting TO tumblr mobile doubles up the fucking paragraph breaks again, and I’m just deadass not fixing that 3 times)
ENJOY chapter 4, part 1!
Today’s chapter is dedicated to @lehana37
One day, beloveds, one day we WILL get to Sam and Dick… but not today, I was having way too much fun bullying Vlad and Bruce
Tag List: @welcometosasakiworld @kyrianclawraith @someonebored0100 @stealingyourbones @starkcravingmad @frostedthroughghost @akikoyuii @rainbowbunny0159 @littlefeather345 @violet-catsarelife @serasvictoria02 @wolfjackle @blacksea21090 @secretdestinywerewolf @anime-hipster-the-amazing @undead-essence @skitscratched @blackroserelina @snoodly-boop @trickerdi @mayoota-blog @xysidhe @idkmrpianoman @little-apricot-the-writer @chaoticmistake @the-legal-shipper @bun-fish @aroranorth-west @demon-cat-goes-woof @eonic @onyxlightdragon @larks-and-katydids
Previous chapter:
First chapter:
———————
Pay Attention To Me Dammit
“Okay,” Danny sucked in a deep breath, surfacing from Jason’s suit to two deeply concerned pairs of blue eyes, “let’s get somewhere private real fast.”
Tucker snickered, helpfully extracting both him and Sam from Jason’s arms.
“I can’t fucking believe you forgot Vlad was coming,” he sighed, voice still shaking as he gave Jason a once over.
Sam, sucking in huge gasps of air, pinched his arm as she straightened.
“Oh shut up, not like you brought him up either,” she wheezed, still grinning.
“Vladdie’s gonna be fucking heartbroken,” Tucker sighed happily, shoving Danny towards a corner.
People were definitely looking. And not just the other four bats; regular guests were watching behind fans, hands, or just deadass staring.
Tim took over, catching Danny’s wrist and pulling the other boy after him. They weren’t that far off the same height.
“So, should I take it that “Vlad” being here is a good thing or a bad thing?” He asked, pulling on his best socialite smile, heading for one of the hall exits instead.
“Back room?” Jason wondered, guiding Sam and Tucker quickly after him. Tim nodded without looking back.
“They shouldn’t be busy yet. We can talk without being overheard,” he added to the other three, who obligingly sped up.
“As for your question, Vlad being here is… probably gonna end up being nothing?” Danny offered, doing his best smiles for the rich assholes they passed.
Sam kicked him in the ankle.
“Wait til we’re alone,” she said quietly, hustling Tucker along.
Unsurprisingly to Jason and Tim, the first back room already had four other people sitting in it, on two extremely plush couches, angled at right angles and facing a fireplace. Before Danny could turn to find another, Steph caught his hand and pulled him in.
“Hi, Stephanie Brown, friend of the Waynes, we’re gonna talk all about Jason’s adorable little crush on you but first, what did you need privacy for?” She asked, eyes bright with innuendo.
Danny grinned right back, already liking this one, and relaxed when Tim and Jason guided the others in and shut the door.
“Well, I guess you all being here means no one has to be found later… and the more eyes the better in this case,” he mused, looking over the other teens and young adult.
Dick waved at Tucker, grinning sarcastically.
“Danny. And Danny,” he added, nodding to Danny himself.
Sam hid a snicker behind her hand.
“That’s what you went with?” She asked Tucker, and he grinned entirely unrepentantly back.
“What, Jason said he told them who I was,” he said in his very best innocent voice.
Before they could get going, Jason raised a hand.
“I’m gonna guess there was a reason you snuck Danny in other than getting back at Sam’s parents? Vlad Masters,” he prodded, dropping to sit on one of the plush royal blue couches next to Cass.
All three Amity Parkers sobered immediately.
“Right… yeah, we should sit for this,” Tucker agreed, glancing around the room. Seating for nine was going to be tight, but… well, he may no longer be a teenager, but he was still seating-flexible.
Introductions were made as people juggled themselves around, finally ending with Cass, Jason, and Danny on one sofa, Sam, Steph, and Damian on the other, and Dick and Tim perching on windowsill or sofa arm respectively. Tucker took the floor.
Once movement stilled, Danny exchanged glances with Sam and Tucker. Maybe hoping that for once, he wouldn’t be doing the explaining?
He shoulda known better.
Sighing, he ran a hand through his hair and didn’t lean intentionally into Jason’s side. It was good to have another halfa around, that was all.
“Sooooo… cliff’s notes? Vlad Masters is a shady billionaire who uses some seriously unethical shit to make predatory deals with other rich folks to steal their fortune. We think he’s here to cement that flashy “b”, byyyy stealing your dad’s fortune,” he explained quickly, glancing around at the Waynes and adjacents he could see.
They did not look convinced.
Tim frowned, leaning forward on his knee and steepling his fingers.
“If you have proof of that, shouldn’t someone already be looking into him?” He asked contemplatively, eyes fixed on Danny’s face.
It was. Weirdly intense.
Fighting down discomfort, Danny shrugged.
“So remember when I said deeply unethical? Think like, mind control. He’s hard to investigate.”
“You make him sound like a supervillain,” Dick noted from the windowsill.
Sam raised a pointed eyebrow at him.
“Duh, we said “billionaire”.”
“Hey,” Tim protested, leaning around Steph to frown at her, “I’m a billionaire.”
She stared him dead in the eye while Steph snickered.
“I said what I said.”
“And you’re a millionaire,” he shot back sharply, eyes narrowing.
Sam didn’t blink.
“I work at a plant nursery my parents don’t approve of and pay my own tuition. My family are millionaires; I’m not,” she said plainly.
Tim puffed up his cheeks, but let them deflate silently. Jason definitely wasn’t smirking.
Cass leaned forwards suddenly, eyes darting around the room searchingly before settling on Sam.
“Masters. Your connection?” She asked softly, the others stilling to hear her.
Both of Sam’s brows rose, but she didn’t comment at hearing the other girl’s voice for the first time. She looked to Danny instead, raising an eyebrow.
Danny blew out a huff of air, ruffling his bangs.
“So… we… well…”
“He wants to fuck Danny’s mom and adopt Danny,” Tucker said bluntly, tipping his head back to hit Danny’s knees and grinning up at him.
Danny poked him in the forehead, but didn’t refute it.
“Yeah. So he’s kinda been my problem for a while. And he’s the mayor of Amity Park now? Is he still?” He asked, looking from one to the other.
Sam shrugged.
“Think so. I haven’t heard about anyone new.”
The Waynes and co were all kind of just… staring at them. Danny gave them jazz hands.
“And now he’s heeeeeere. He probably won’t make any moves if he knows I’m around, but we should keep an eye on him around Mr Wayne anyway.”
“And we can add him to the fuckery list, along with Sam’s parents,” Tucker added with a very satisfied smile.
It drew all eyes his way, ranging from intrigued to sceptical.
“How?” Steph asked, eyes bright.
Tucker waved a hand over the room.
“Black hair. Blue eyes. For one thing, Mr Drake-Wayne is even the same height, so if he sees you from behind, he could be confused. Dick’s not far off either. And best of all,” he added while the others did quick visual comparisons, decidedly smug, “we hint that Bruce is thinking of accepting Danny as an intern. Step one of Wayne Adoption.”
Sam’s eyes lit up with evil glee.
“Oh he’d do his fucking nut if you cozied up to someone richer than him, Danny,” she gasped, hands bouncing on her lap.
Danny hesitated for a moment, glancing over at Jason. Who was looking back, gears clearly turning. Seeing that he had Danny’s eye, he leaned in quickly.
“Vlad Masters would be Vlad Plasmius, yes?” He asked in a low voice. He’d scanned the database more than read in detail, but he knew the basics.
One very important basic.
Vlad was the other halfa.
And Vlad could sense other halfas. For a hot second Danny very nearly took off out of the room, ready to go find and kick Vlad’s ass and keep him far, far away from Jason.
He didn’t realise he’d clenched his fists until one of them was held in a large, hot hand. Slowly, shakily he uncurled them, checking for blood in the deep half moon crevices now dug in his palms.
Nothing. He was fine.
“Danny?” Jason asked softly, and Danny looked up to his face. There was something in his eyes, something familiar in the way they flashed a deep, sudden green when their eyes met.
Yeah, Jason’s Obsession was fucking definitely Protection, at least in part. Danny clasped his hand quickly, half worried Jason was gonna do just what he’d had to try so hard not to.
Would it have been that bad if Jason was just his friend, not his knight?
There was no way to know anymore.
Covering Jason’s hands in both of his, he gave Jason the best smile he could.
“I’m fine. But yeah, that’s him. And we… should probably also have a private word.” Because there was this sudden, very nasty little temptation curling through him.
“Would this private word have anything to do with Jason almost going full feral?” Dick asked with a studied innocence that had at least a master’s degree.
Which was when Danny noticed that the rest were all staring at them. At their clasped hands. At Jason’s still a little too green eyes.
**
Jason grimaced, fully aware of what they must have seen. He tamped the green down firmly, pushing against the wave of protect-protect-PROTECT the pit was damn near screaming inside him.
Wasn’t entirely sure it was only the pit.
Watching Danny tense up like that, clearly in the throes of fight or flight, pulled at something primal inside him.
Jason didn’t know who Vlad Masters was, what he looked like, what he was doing, but he was fully willing to throw him out of the building by the neck if Danny would relax even a little.
He threatens my king, something growled in the back of his mind and Jason’s hands jerked.
That was fucking new. And not fucking welcome.
He looked to Dick instead, giving him a strained smile. It was the best he could do right now.
“Yeah,” he admitted, not fully comfortable with how strained his voice sounded. How tight his throat felt.
Had the pit tried to use his mouth? Make him speak?
Just the thought made him want to puke, but he pushed that down too. He had shit to do today, and the pit wasn’t gonna ruin it.
“I told you he was helping me with the pit,” he added when Dick still looked calculatedly calm. Definitely not about to tackle him to the ground if he moved too suddenly.
Fuck Jason hoped Dick never tried. When they fought for fun, for training, sure Dick could hand him his ass six ways from Sunday. But when the green took over…
He didn’t want to hurt his brother. None of his brothers, ever again.
Except maybe a little bit psychologically.
“Fenton’s eyes changed too,” Damian said sharply, and oooh absolutely nothing in Jason liked that accusatory tone.
Not about Danny. Not about his king.
His head snapped around to glare at the youngest and knew his eyes had gone green again from the way the others recoiled. All but Sam and Danny. And Damian, suicidal little gremlin.
All but Cass, who slipped herself carefully but immovably back into his lap, hooking her feet into the backs of his knees and hands on his cheeks. Pinning him in place.
Making him look at her, not Damian.
She studied his expression intensely, her eyes saying more than even Dick could manage.
And there was a hand in his again, gently soothing across his fingers until his knuckles opened, and Cass let him look away to Danny. Doing just what Jason had done less than a minute ago.
Danny didn’t have to tell his secrets to anyone he didn’t want to. Not now, not the first time they met, not before he trusted them.
Anger-protect-not their business
And Danny smiled back, all gentle and soft, and Jason settled back, relaxing muscles he hadn’t noticed tensing.
Reassurance-calm-safe safe safe-trust
If Jason trusted them, Danny would too. And if that didn’t sting something right in his chest.
Danny cleared his throat, turning back to the rest of the room and giving them a slightly tighter smile.
“Yeah. I. Uh… I was exposed to the Lazarus pits? About a year before Jason was. So I know what it’s like when it gets too strong.”
Half truths at best, but close enough to be believed. To make sense.
Close enough that no one except Damian, tactless boy wonder, would ever ask.
“Only the dying can survive exposure to the pits,” the boy snapped, eyes sharp as he studied Danny in a new light.
Jason’s hands nearly clenched again, but this time Danny’s was in the way. Protecting Danny meant not crushing Danny’s hand.
Good loophole.
“The dying and the dead,” Danny agreed placidly, calm just barely tinted by amusement.
Jason closed his eyes, let himself focus on breathing in Danny’s aura.
Was that a hint of trouble-fun-plans plans mayhem?
Damian squinted at Danny for another long moment, then nodded sharply and sat back. Steph punched him.
“Damian, you can’t just go asking people if they’ve died,” she hissed in a comically loud whisper.
“It was relevant to the conversation!” Damian insisted, immediately sitting back up to defend his honour. Steph tweaked his nose and he properly growled, gearing up to tackle her.
“It was rude, Dami,” Dick coaxed gently, coming from the windowsill to the couch to scoop Damian into his arms.
The only one of them who could have done it and survived. Damian glowered up at him too, then folded his arms and scowled at the floor.
Dire retributions would surely be incoming.
“Hey, it’s cool,” Danny caused, grinning along with the others now that the tension had broken. “He just wanted to know I’m not gonna hurt Jason, right?”
All eyes turned back to Damian, who squinted suspiciously at Danny again. Jason was ready for the flare of protectiveness this time.
Danny was fine. He could handle the demon brat, even if Dick didn’t have him in hand already.
Jason didn’t want to hurt his brother.
Which caused a different, confusing flare of protectiveness because what he needed to protect Damian from was himself, and the self same flares.
He stifled a chuckle that would probably only make things worse.
Finally Damian huffed, turning away into Dick’s arms.
“Tt. Ridiculous. I only wished to be sure you spoke the truth,” he snapped, and the room resettled.
Danny raised both hands, grinning, and Cass shuffled to rest her ear over Jason’s heart.
“Okay?” She asked softly, moving her feet from his pressure points. Jason brought his other arm up and around her, squeezing gently.
“Yeah, I’m good. Thanks,” he replied just as quietly, resting his cheek in her hair.
“Well, this does also kinda simplify things,” Danny added with a chuckle, leaning back against the couch. “I can just tell all of you; Vlad’s also been ecto…. Pit contaminated. And we can sense each other, so he’s going to know Jason is too.”
That geared the bats back up, all turning back to stare at Danny. Who grinned utterly wickedly.
“So Vladdie gets to be on the rare and extremely valued double fuckery list.”
“Is he gonna try and do anything to Jason?” Steph asked sharply, posture tensing towards the door like it might open at any second.
Tucker shrugged, moving back to lean against the couch next to Danny’s legs. He’d wisely made himself scarce when there was a chance either halfa would make a break for it.
“Like Danny said, Vlad probably won’t try anything if he knows we’re around? He can’t do his mind control on Danny so he’s gotta keep it in his pants, even if he’d rather not.”
Sam brightened, catching on to where the boys were going.
“But because Vlad is like… Obsessed with Danny for being like him, there’s a chance he’ll wanna try and adopt Jason too,” she said slowly, her smile becoming full and wicked.
“And since we’re already planning to have me and Jason caught in some indelicate way to upset the Mansons,” Danny added, utterly self satisfied, “we can fry his brain thinking he can only adopt one of us.”
“And that’s after we make him play Find The Real Danny,” Tucker jumped in, grinning broadly, “because it’s not specific enough to track a single person in a busy room. Do you guys do accents?”
Tim and Dick exchanged glances and shrugged.
“Yours wouldn’t be hard,” Tim pointed out, a smirk pulling across his own face as he nodded to Danny.
“I’d like to know why we’re also fucking with the Mansons though?” Dick asked, raising an eyebrow at Sam. Who shrugged.
“They refused to let me bring my girlfriend as a plus one. So we’re gonna ruin me for men and make them think twice next time.”
“Wait, so you’re not dating Danny?” Steph asked, proving she had been hovering during their little meet and greet.
None of the Amity Parkers seemed surprised. Not by her listening in, anyway.
Danny flushed cherry red, Tucker burst out laughing, and Sam smirked.
“Not since high school,” she said casually. Danny groped around for a throwable pillow but came up short.
For some reason, Jason felt absolutely no need to protect his king from some righteous bullying. Another fun loophole.
Must be the lack of potential stabbing.
Dick grinned suddenly, now leaning on the other arm of the couch from Tim.
“Okay, but we definitely don’t tell this part to Bruce,” he said eagerly, beckoning all the others closer. “If Jason’s job is to flirt with Sam and defile Danny, we were also here to meet Danny as Jason’s boyfriend.”
“Let Bruce think Danny’s leading you both on!” Steph finished, clapping her hands and cackling. “Oh it’s perfect!”
Sam cackled along with her, turning a much warmer smile on the other girl.
“Oh, my parents would love to trash talk Danny to him too, they’ve probably already hurried off to let him know I’m “eligible”,” she agreed with the most sarcastic air quotes Jason had ever seen.
Steph lurched immediately to her feet.
“We’re gonna miss it! Okay, so our first task is to make sure Vlad knows Danny is here, right? So he knows not to try anything on Bruce,” she added to confirm, looking between the Amity Parkers.
Danny frowned thoughtfully, touching his lower lip. Jason tried not to focus on it.
“He should know as soon as we get within proximity of each other… so probably once we’re both in the big room?”
Steph nodded sharply, turning to point to Tim.
“We need to know what he looks like. Can you get us a picture?”
Tim nodded, already tapping at his phone and rising along with Steph, the fire of planning in his eyes.
“On it. Sam and Jason need to be seen to be flirting, but Danny doesn’t have to be with them. Dick and I can wander through the crowd, keeping an eye out for Masters but keeping our faces turned away. Cass, can you help with that?”
Cass gave a thumbs up, sitting straighter and resting her head on Jason’s shoulder instead.
“Yes. Can be Dick’s eyes, signal you both.”
Tim typed a moment longer, then lowered his phone and wheeled, turning to point to Damian.
“And you should all have the photo… now. Damian, if you can get as close to Masters as you can, you can signal us too if he gets too close to Bruce or us.”
Damian nodded and glanced down at his phone, all ruffled feathers smoothing as he tucked it away and straightened his suit.
“I shall watch him for any suspicious moves. I can also run interference if he approaches Father.”
Steph nodded happily and clapped her hands, pointing both at Tucker.
“And you can join me in spying on the Mansons and recording them if they talk to Bruce, for the rest of us to enjoy later!” She declared triumphantly.
Tucker shot to his feet, grinning broadly.
“Yeah! And if they catch us we can tell them Jason and Sam are doing something, or ask if they’ve seen Danny,” he agreed, bouncing on his toes. He stuck a hand out in front of him. “Ready?”
Steph slapped her palm down on the back of his hand.
“Ready!”
The room now filled with purpose, everyone came to join Tucker, sticking their hands in in a circle, even as Damian complained about “ridiculous social rituals”.
No one else seemed to mind, tossing their hands into the air as they all whispered “BREAK!”, not wanting to be heard from the hallway.
As the room emptied, Danny hung back, catching Jason’s eye.
“So I know you’re probably not ready to talk about this,” he said softly as Sam lingered in the doorway, her back conspicuously to them, “but I just need to ask you if there was electricity involved when you died.”
Jason felt his whole body tense, less than pleasant memories rushing to the fore. Broken bones. A blade in his leg. Explosion.
No electricity.
He could see the strain on Danny’s face as his mind cleared, and shook his head.
“No. Why?” He asked warily, suddenly very concerned.
Danny made a face that did precisely nothing to lessen it, looking away.
“Because there was when I died, and Vlad knows it. And he… he can control electricity. But you’ll be fine, well, other than the usual “oh no a bad guy is shooting me with electricity”, right?”
Danny was babbling now, clearly trying to distract himself, but all Jason could see was pure, pulsing green. Before he knew he’d moved he had an arm wrapped firmly around slender shoulders, crushing Danny to his chest.
He didn’t need to be told that reminders of a ghost’s death wounds could be debilitating. He’d have known without the database. Without the catch in Danny’s voice.
“If he ever lays a fucking finger on you again I’ll fucking kill him,” he growled, his voice coming out almost as low as his helmet modulator.
Danny stiffened for just a moment in his grasp, then relaxed against him.
“I mean, I can handle myself,” he protested weakly, voice somewhat muffled in Jason’s jacket, “but I’m not gonna fight you on that one, Jay.”
It soothed something inside him, something hot in the center of his chest that burned at just the thought of anyone hurting the man in his arms.
Attacking him. Using the pain and trauma of his death against him. Attacking his king.
A gentle hand soothed up and down his spine.
Safe-protected-I’m okay-safe
It took a minute before Jason could bring himself to let go, smiling sheepishly down at Danny.
“Sorry. Guess I’m… uh, not used to dealing with anything other than rage from the pit,” he explained weakly.
It felt stupid, comparing something as soft as the urge to protect to those bloodthirsty rampages. That didn’t make it any less true.
Danny shrugged, rolling out his shoulders and grinning up at him.
“Hey, like I said. Shoulda seen me when I first changed. Anyway, shall we go make Vlad’s night a living hell?” He asked wickedly, a cheeky smile on his face.
Jason nodded and made for the door, giving Sam a small smile of appreciation. She looked between the two of them and snickered.
“Yeah, rumpling you both up in a closet’s gonna be easy breezy,” she said lazily, pushing the door open again. “You should trade ties.”
Danny’s hand flew to his throat and he chuckled softly, then shook both of his hands out.
“Okay… time to go make sure Vladdie knows I’m around,” he sighed, cracking his neck. Like he was limbering up for a fight?
Jason cocked a brow, taking Sam’s arm.
“What are you gonna do?” He asked as they moved out into the hall, back towards the ballroom.
Danny shot him a quick grin.
“Expand my aura to cover the whole room. He’ll know I’m flexing, and he won’t be able to miss it. Should help confuse him about Tim and Dick too, since the whole place is gonna feel like me,” he added, and Jason grinned.
Alright, that was gonna be a useful trick. Time to see that famous Ghost King aura put to the test.
He wasn’t really expecting to feel a change really. He was close enough that Danny’s aura was still brushing gently over his, soothing the pit that he was right there.
Ready and close if Jason needed to protect him.
And then Danny’s brows furrowed for a moment, he flexed his shoulders back, and Jason was surrounded in pulsing waves of DANNY-DANNY-DANNY.
He didn’t know he’d stumbled until Sam caught him, her hand small on his chest right over the thudding pulse of his heart.
He barely felt her touch. All he could see, all he could hear, all he could feel was the raw power surging out of the man beside him.
Feeling Frostbite in the Far Frozen had been overwhelming. This… this rewrote the beat of his heart, crawled with his breath into his lungs, curled around every deep and intimate part of himself.
It made him feel tiny and delicate, swept up and held off his feet by Danny’s sheer presence. Crowded and pushed up against the wall, held in place, and Danny wasn’t even fucking trying.
Everything was right in the world. His King was here. The pit fucking sang in his veins.
Aaaand Jason hadn’t been this hard in dress pants since he’d been an excitable teenager who couldn’t help it. Eyes closing, he swayed back against the hallway wall.
He could just barely feel Sam’s hand still on his chest, a grounding point as he sucked in deep breaths. Heard her snicker as the ringing in his ears began to die down.
“You’re getting better at that, Danny,” she noted, and Jason hissed.
This could have been worse? More? How?
And then Danny’s hand was at his shoulder too and he didn’t need to open his eyes to know it. Knew the touch, the feel, the way the pit surged warmth to the spot.
Heard Danny’s soft voice as though it were being broadcast straight into his head.
“Hey, you okay?” He asked quietly, and Jason honestly wasn’t sure.
Think about Bruce’s old underwear commercials. Jane Austen novels. Alfred’s expression if Jason ruined his good pants this fucking early into a party.
Later, maybe, it’d give a flare of authenticity but Danny almost certainly wouldn’t be down.
Danny. There was someone here who wanted to hurt Danny.
Jason’s eyes snapped open and he sucked in another deep breath. It was still redolent of Danny’s aura, still cupping him on every side, but he had a purpose now. A job to do.
He managed a slightly strained smile.
“‘M fine. It’s just a shock.” He cleared his throat, reaching down to tug at the front of his trousers as subtly as he could. “Is, uh… is it always like that?”
Danny looked confused for a moment, still concerned, but it was easier to miss the pulsing beat of his emotions now. Easier to focus.
He’d protect Danny’s feelings too, but he couldn’t do that if he was overwhelmed.
Who knew he’d be this into feeling like he was drowning in someone?
Finally Danny shrugged, glancing out towards the ballroom.
“I wouldn’t know… it doesn’t feel all that different to me. Just like everyone in the room is now inside my personal space,” he added, pulling a face.
Jason stared at him for a long moment, wondering how the hell he was going to ask. If he even wanted to mention the effects it had had - was still having, cleaning guns, Alfred in lace, Vlad was still here.
Nope.
Just. Nope. Not opening that can of worms today.
If Danny didn’t know that just feeling him all around him like that was gonna send Jason to horny jail, Jason was just never gonna tell him. And if Vlad had an even similar reaction, Jason would double kick his ass.
Hauling himself away from the wall, Jason cleared his throat again and fixed his jacket.
“Alright… I’m good. Shall we?” He asked Sam, offering her his arm this time. She gave him a quick up and down, raised a brow, but didn’t comment.
“Sure you are,” she chuckled softly, taking his arm with a reluctant half smile, turning back to Danny. “Are you gonna stick close, or do you wanna recon Vlad?”
Danny considered it for a moment, moving with them as they returned to the hall. Then he shrugged.
“I might go take a peek, but if I see your parents I’ll third wheel back on over. You guys should go mosey,” he added, waving a hand quickly.
Jason nodded, tucking Sam closer, turned back to the room, and… froze. Sam, utterly unaffected, made it a couple steps forward before she noticed and turned back, frowning.
“Hey, what’s up?” She asked in a low whisper, eyes flicking around them.
Good fucking question.
Jason closed his eyes, sucking in a slow breath and trying to work out what had shot down his spine like cold water. Brows furrowed, he tried to will his feet to move.
Took a step backwards and opened his eyes again, frowning back at Sam.
“Alright, I didn’t mean to do that,” he hissed, head turning automatically… to where Danny had taken a couple of steps away.
Green surged below his skin, asking what the fuck he thought he was doing. Abandoning his post. Leaving his king.
There was someone here who’d hurt him, who’d used his fucking death against him, and Jason was gonna what? Not be close enough to break his fingers for thinking it?
Eyes closed for a moment, Jason weighed the odds he could just push this down and keep going. Felt Sam tuck closer. They did have a whole ass plan…
Felt a sudden wash of concern-what’s wrong-protect from the surrounding warmth of Danny.
And sighed, shaking his head, pulling Sam with him after Danny. With each step the green sung, a deep satisfaction not his own rising inside.
He gave Danny a sheepish smile and a shrug.
“I don’t think I can leave you alone. Not if he’s here,” he added a little more quietly, well aware they were being watched once again.
Confusion flashed across Danny’s face for a moment, then he groaned and slapped himself in the forehead.
“Fucking Clockwork… alright, we stick together. Tim and Dick will have plenty of fun with Vlad anyway,” he said, grin slowly spreading again as he tucked himself in to Sam’s other side.
“And we can have more fun with my parents,” Sam pointed out innocently, scanning the crowd around them. Shot them both a sidelong glance each, half smirking. “And I get two lots of cute arm candy.”
Danny and Jason turned automatically to look each other over, Jason’s grin broadening as Danny’s cheeks flushed.
Dick had said he looked a treat in this suit. Must have been right about something.
Suddenly Danny’s aura was all very studious and concentrated nothing to see here.
Jason bit the inside of his lip to keep from laughing, letting his eyes trail a little slower over his king’s frame.
Wherever Danny had gotten his suit from, they knew a thing or two about tailoring. It fit him well, emphasising the lean lines of his legs and torso. Didn’t quite square off his shoulders.
Jason still hadn’t had much practice with projecting his own emotions back, but he had the feeling his… appreciation got through when Danny’s blush darkened.
Grinning down at Sam, Jason patted her hand.
“Only if my code name’s Gummy Bear.”
A startled laugh from Danny was the reaction he’d been going for. Sam’s sudden, utterly wicked smile was a lot more concerning.
“Alright. Danny’s is gonna be Jawbreaker,” she decided, her gaze darting briefly down to Jason’s lips as she smirked.
Jason looked away quickly, his own cheeks uncomfortably warm as Danny choked.
***
Vlad Masters smiled to himself as he moved through the crowd, a shark among minnows. Their vacuous chatter was a soothing background noise; practically already the emptying of their pocket books.
Oh, he didn’t like to come to Gotham, not with that Bat that flapped around. The Bat didn’t like metas, or people who could do just a little more than curl up and die.
But, well, this had been an opportunity just too sweet to pass up.
He could dip his toes in Daniel’s new haunt, remind the boy that he’d never be too far away if he needed him. He could get a look at this son of Bruce Wayne’s, that had died and come back.
And just maybe he’d get a claw into Wayne Enterprises, and get a look at some of their latest technology for his own… uses.
Yes, Vlad was feeling productive just being here, even if he did have to keep his ghostly abilities on lock.
He drifted through the crowd, joining conversations, sniffing out weaknesses, moving on. Oh, some of these wealthy types thought they were hunters too, he could see it in their eyes.
He’d made his fortune by taking from those types of men and letting them see what true power looked like. It was much more satisfying to break a man who thought he was unbreakable.
Bruce Wayne wasn’t one of that type, but he had something that Vlad wanted. Still, the man seemed vacuous enough, all laughing and drink and flirting.
He’d handed control of his company to his teenaged son (and oh Vlad was a little jealous of him for thinking of that move… if only Daniel was more… pliable).
But Vlad could see himself letting Brucie keep at least some of his assets. The man was entertaining, and it’d show Daniel he’d listened.
He could change. In ways that weren’t too… inconvenient for him.
And then he’d have a shield in Gotham, and Wayne could deal with that meddlesome Bat, and he could pay Daniel a visit.
He’d just caught sight of his true quarry, standing in a small circle of fawning admirers when the felt the Presence flood the room.
It sent a shiver up his spine and he locked his knees, refusing to let any weakness show as the air filled with the heavy static of Daniel.
So the boy was here? Interesting. He’d have a chance to see his Little Badger even before he left the party.
He had seen the Mansons on the guest list and he had to wonder if the lad had finally gotten closer to his little goth friend. Close enough to be a plus one?
The elder Mansons would surely hate that, and make that hatred known. Unless Vlad were to… step in. Save the boy from their judgemental stares.
Remind them that Daniel may not be from a wealthy family, but he was still connected to the Masters name.
Yes, this was wonderfully good news and Vlad felt almost chipper, a spring in his step as he advanced on Wayne. Oh, the boy was flaring off, showing Vlad he had some power too, but Vlad wasn’t here to fight.
All he needed was to set up one simple meeting between himself and Wayne, and then all of tonight could be for his Little Badger. Imagine, Vlad Masters having the chance to play the hero.
He was most definitely looking forward to it. And ah yes, here they were, the Mansons already at Bruce Wayne’s elbow, chattering away.
Everything really was coming up Vlad.
**
Bruce had met the Mansons before of course, at other charity events across the country. They were… well, pretty much exactly the type of nouveau riche he kept his children away from at all costs.
Never impolitely, of course. Never letting on how their false smiles and honeyed lies made his gut squirm in distaste. He was always cordial, and could safely rely on the effect his smile had on both of the couple.
But they weren’t what you’d call close, even in gala circles, so it was something of a surprise when they sought him out.
“Ah, Brucie! There you are, good to see you,” the husband, Jeremy, called jovially as they approached, clapping him on the back.
Bruce gave them one of his better Brucie smiles, returning the gesture with a calculated firmness.
“Jeremy! Wonderful to see you,” he greeted them both exuberantly, eyes discretely scanning both to try and work out what they wanted. They always wanted something.
The wife, Pamela his mental rolodex said, simpered up at him, clutching at her husband’s arm.
“Of course we were simply delighted to hear that your son was found, we couldn’t possibly miss the party!” She gushed, letting her hand flutter over his. “You know, our Samantha is about the same age.”
Ah.
Well, that was a first. For Jason, anyway; Tim and Damian both had plenty of parents hopefully thrusting their children his way. Even Dick was subject to occasional propositions.
Jason had barely been his long enough to be considered eligible when he’d… well.
Bruce would mention it to Dick later, so his eldest could tease Jason about this latest milestone. Best not broach the subject himself.
He cranked the wattage on his smile down a little, looking carefully behind the couple.
“Yes, I believe I’ve met Samantha before,” he said genially, mind scanning through his gala notes.
Samantha Manson. Usually seen in elaborate pink and frilly gowns, always seen utterly despising them. Quiet, rebellious eyes.
At least Jason might find someone tolerable to talk to.
“Is she here tonight?” He finished, like he hadn’t personally memorised the guest list.
Pamela and Jeremy Manson. Samantha Manson. And plus one.
Plus one? Clearly someone the parents found less agreeable than Jason, and Bruce couldn’t help feeling sorry for the poor kid.
Jeremy was already nodding cheerfully, a sparkle in those eyes that put Bruce on edge.
“Oh yes, she’s off talking to your boy right now in fact,” he said with a very self satisfied chuckle, shooting Bruce a knowing look. “I think they quite hit it off.”
“Poor Jason was just telling us how few friends he has his own age, and of course Samantha would much prefer his company than being stuck with her parents,” Pamela trilled, giving Bruce a knowing look of her own, about three shades smuttier than her husband’s.
He could very, very easily believe that, even with as little time as he’d spent with the elder Mansons. Still, best not let them get their hopes up.
“How lovely! I’m sure Jason will keep her well entertained, he has his own plus one for the evening and he does thrive with an audience.”
He’d been expecting them to dim a little at the mention of a plus one, and if not maybe to delicately hint that the current partner was male.
Bruce might not personally know how serious Jason was in this new relationship, but he’d have his son’s back against any of the gala harpies.
He was not expecting them both to beam even brighter.
“Why, that’s the best thing!” Pamela beamed, clapping her hands. “His plus one, Tucker Foley, is Samantha’s very best friend! They’ve been close since high school, very close,” she added proudly, like she’d curated the friendship herself.
Bruce was beginning to think he’d have to mention he knew Samantha also had a plus one when Jeremy nodded happily.
“And of course Samantha brought along her other friend, Daniel from home too, so we were quite concerned the boys might run off together and leave our little girl on her lonesome, but your Jason really took a shine to her!”
Something sharpened in Bruce’s spine, catching at his attention.
“Daniel?” He asked, innocently as he could, and spotted Steph and a young Black man heading their way. Certainly she’d hang back to get more information. “Would I know him?”
Pamela’s face scrunched for a moment before smoothing back into a perfect, empty smile.
“Oh, I very much doubt it. The boy is from a rather disreputable family I’m afraid, very bad influences, but our Samantha has never shied from offering her hand in friendship.”
Bruce took a moment to compare this sentence to the young woman he remembered, barely covering seething resentment under a very similar empty smile.
Friendship. Yes, he could see her offering that to literally anyone her parents disapproved of.
But if this was the same “Danny” Jason was getting involved with, it was his fatherly duty to learn what he could.
He schooled his face to his best politely interested morbid fascination.
“Oh? Please tell me more.”
**
Steph and Tucker sped up as they caught sight of Bruce, Steph leaning in to whisper,
“Are those the Mansons talking to him?”
Tucker nodded, slipping around to the other side of her for partial cover.
“Yeah, that’s them… wonder what they’re saying, he looks so concerned,” he whispered back, and Steph snickered.
“That’s his “your problems are so fascinating tell me everything” face,” she explained quietly, turning to plant her back to the nearest small table.
This one held a small crystal sculpture that was probably supposed to symbolize something, but she wasn’t gonna look twice. Instead she slipped her phone out of a discrete pocket and hit record.
Tucker took a moment to admire the new tech, leaning around her with an intrigued smile.
“Oh, is that the new WayneTech phone? Can I see?” He asked, brightening up.
Steph grinned and shook her head, carefully angling it to point at Bruce and the Mansons without making it look intentional.
“Not the newest release, but the one before. Tim lost a bet so he had to give me some free upgrades,” she added when Tucker looked confused.
“But aren’t you one of the Waynes? Why would you be a release behind?” He sounded honestly dumbfounded and Steph hid a snicker.
He sounded like Tim every time she turned down one of Bruce’s toys.
“I’m really just a family friend, and I don’t wanna have to get a whole new phone every time Tim or his nerd team has a new idea. You can look later, I wanna catch what they’re saying,” she hissed and he reluctantly quieted, still looking at her like she was crazy.
Yeah.
Tim 2.0. She was gonna have to text Connor later.
Tuck pulled his PDA out and she half expected him to start recording too, but instead he pulled up a handy decoy screen so he could pretend to be showing her something.
And…
Tapped into the video currently being recorded on her phone. She raised a brow and he grinned back, tapping a few buttons and boosting the volume.
“There are some advantages to upgrading your tech,” he said smugly and pulled out a pair of earbuds, offering her one.
They pulled them out about five minutes later.
Steph clapped her hand over her mouth, fighting down giggles as she dropped the earbud into Tucker’s hand.
“Holy fucking shit to people still actually talk like that?” She hissed between her teeth. Tucker, also fighting laughter, stuffed the headphones back into a pocket.
“Yeah, honestly? My mom loves Saturday morning soaps and even she’d call that overplayed,” he snickered, shaking her head.
“You’d think Danny ate their fucking cat, what the hell happened there?” Steph asked, lips pressing tightly shut on another laugh as she made awkward eye contact with some passing guests.
“Honestly? Nothing, they just don’t like his parents, and that makes Danny a “hoodlum”,” Tucker rolled his eyes and grinned, flipping his PDA to a different channel, and then suddenly flipping back. “Aaaaand shit, that’s Vlad. This is gonna be good.”
Steph pulled the PDA quickly from his hands as he lunged back into a pocket.
“Quick, get them back, there is no way I’m missing this!”
**
Vlad couldn’t say he was honestly surprised to walk in on the Mansons telling some outlandish story that was almost all sly innuendo. It was why Pamela came to these parties after all.
What was surprising was the way Wayne’s face grew more and more serious as she spoke, painting a picture of Daniel as some kind of delinquent thug.
Which, to be fair, wasn’t an entirely inaccurate picture of the boy on his worse days, but hardly represented his best.
And if he reached into just a hint of ghostly stealth to come up behind her, well, watching Pamela Manson startle as he cut in with a well placed greeting was more than worth it.
“My, that does sound like a fascinating story Pamela! And you say this was young Daniel?” He asked, watching with satisfaction as both Mansons spun to stare.
“Brucie” gave him a sharp, almost assessing look too, much more thoughtful than he usually bothered with. Interesting.
Pamela brightened when she recognized him, beckoning him in.
“Oh, yes! Vlad, do join us, I was just telling Brucie here about some of those silly ghost adventures Daniel would pull Samantha into in high school!” She clearly expected him to join in.
Ah, but today Vlad’s role was to be Daniel’s hero, not Phantom’s nemesis. And maybe to see just what had managed to rub two brain cells together in Wayne’s famously amicable head.
He gave her a fond smile, nodding in greeting to the men and taking his place in their circle.
“Why, Pamela, I do hope you’re not disparaging my godson before Mr Wayne even has a chance to say hello?” It was a calculated guess, but honestly.
However Daniel got into this party (and he would put money on his dear goth friend Sam herself), he wouldn’t be introduced to the man holding the purse strings.
From the corner of his eye he also caught a very familiar red beret, and his brow quirked slightly.
Daniel, Sam, and Tucker Foley, all in one place. They must have heard he’d be coming.
How… adorable.
His smile spread as Pamela’s faded, even as Brucie turned to offer him a hand and a warm smile.
“Mr Masters, yes? I believe we’ve met at a few of these before,” the man said, all charm and sunshine.
Vlad shook the offered hand firmly, resisting the urge to just poke directly into his mind.
Tucker was listening. Best give him something interesting to report.
“Yes, I wasn’t aware you knew the Mansons too? One of our finest families in Amity Park,” he purred, giving them both an almost predatory smile.
Jeremy puffed up under it like it was actual praise, but Pamela was still watching him curiously.
“Oh yes, we’re going to be quite close,” she said airily, giving Brucie a secretive smile.
The man didn’t quite return it, the same friendly, open smile not changing in the slightest.
More interesting still.
“And perhaps you and I will be getting closer too, Vlad. Can I call you Vlad?” He asked, and Vlad’s smile widened.
“Of course. Is there something I should know?” He asked, half teasing.
Brucie’s expression flickered almost too fast to see. Something like actual thought under that big soft smile.
“It seems that my son Jason has been spending time with young Samantha and Daniel,” he explained, still sounding just the same cheery fool.
Vlad’s smile widened further, and he took a moment to reign himself in. It wouldn’t do for him to stretch too far. It could make people nervous.
“Oh, how wonderful!” He exclaimed happily, rubbing his hands together. “I was hoping to congratulate him personally on his return, it is quite a rare feat!”
And if Daniel was sniffing around him, that added credence to the rumours that the boy really had died. And possibly changed.
Now, if he could just speak to the young Jason alone, see how easily he could be swayed… if the boys were already friends, perhaps he could even plead Vlad’s case to Daniel directly.
Brucie gave him a dazzling smile, gesturing to Pamela jovially.
“Well, I certainly hope so! From Mrs Manson’s stories I was beginning to worry that Jason might be falling into some rough company.”
Vlad gave the woman a smile that would have chilled if he’d had Daniel’s ice core, but instead crackled with his own electricity.
“Oh, young Daniel may be a bit rough around the edges, but there’s no more loyal boy anywhere in the country,” he assured Wayne smoothly, and noted Tucker and the blonde girl he was with breaking away.
Off to report to Daniel, then. Good.
“Really, you can judge best when you meet him yourself,” Vlad all but purred, watching them go, “after all, you yourself know all about taking young men from rough circumstances and polishing them to a shine.”
Brucie’s smile was all proud paternal joy as he looked out across the room, and for a moment Vlad wondered how many of his interminable brood had actually come.
A young man was very suddenly at Brucie’s side and even the man himself seemed to startle, but his smile only grew as he clapped the boy on the shoulder.
“And here’s one of them now! Mr and Mrs Manson, Vlad, this is my youngest son Damian.”
The boy certainly had Bruce’s jawline, and the same wide eyes the press so loved, even if the eyes themselves were green. Any other similarities would be hard to spot as the boy fixed Vlad with a glare that could have been Daniel’s.
“Good evening,” he said curtly, and Vlad pressed his lips together to keep from chuckling.
“Why, such a stern young man!” Pamela cooed beside him, bending down to give her sweetest smile to the boy. Wilting just a little when he turned the glare on her.
Brucie’s hand tightened momentarily on the boy’s shoulder and his expression immediately smoothed out.
“I’m sure he’d much rather be off with his friends, but he was good enough to come tonight and support his brother,” Brucie explained cheerfully, giving Damian a proud smile.
“Wonderful to see young people who understand the importance of family,” Vlad nodded, keeping half an eye on the boy as he spoke. His eyes had narrowed just a little, probably looking for a patronizing tone.
At these kinds of parties, it’d likely be all he heard.
Still, Vlad settled in to make some idle small talk, whiling away the time until dinner. No serious business would be discussed until after the meal after all.
Perhaps he could persuade Brucie to introduce him to Jason.
**
It was Steph who zeroed in on Jason’s flash of white hair first, but Tucker who crashed almost directly into Danny and hissed the news.
“Vlad’s here and he’s complimenting you!”
Danny stumbled back to catch them both, staring in bewilderment.
“He’s fucking what?” He asked incredulously. Tucker nodded quickly, grabbing his elbows.
“Seriously, he basically told the Mansons to fuck off for badmouthing you,” he hissed, and now Sam was intrigued too.
“Vlad? Our Vlad? “Phantom is the greatest threat our city has ever known” Vlad?” She asked.
Danny elbowed her sharply and she rolled her eyes, but Steph definitely noted it down to ask later. Tucker nodded again, faster than before.
“Right? He’s definitely up to something.”
“Could be his new plan to win you over,” Steph added, closing the rest of the distance to tuck herself into the group.
Danny paused for a moment then grimaced and shook his head.
“Nah, it’s never that simple with Vlad. He knows I’m not gonna just hear some kind words and fall into his arms.”
Sam rolled her eyes, turning and firmly piloting their new cluster to one of the windows, out of the way of the less nosy eyes.
“Danny, it’s Vlad. He’s still convinced your mom just needs to be alone with him for five minutes to fall head over heels, no matter how many times she karate chops him.”
Which, yes, Steph was adding that to the questions list too, a smile tugging at her lips. She cut them off anyway, making pointed eye contact with Jason.
“Not that this doesn’t already sound fun, but I’m also pretty sure I just saw Selina Kyle,” she told him sweetly, and had the joy of watching him actually blue screen.
Just. Stared into space for fifteen seconds.
Then sighed and scrubbed both hands down his face.
“Of fucking course she is. Why not? Does anyone wanna call the Joker, see if he wants to join too?” He asked sarcastically, tossing both hands into the air.
Steph snickered and rose on her tiptoes to ruffle his hair, ignoring the confusion of their new friends.
“Hey, look at it this way. She’ll keep Bruce off your ass,” she offered cheerfully and Jason groaned louder, giving the window a speculative look like he was considering jumping out of it.
Tempting.
Sam leaned in, giving them both a sharp look.
“Who’s Selina Kyle?” She asked bluntly, and Steph paused for just a moment, wondering how best to put it.
How to describe the fucking disaster that was Batman and Catwoman to someone who couldn’t know either of their identities. Ah, yes, she knew.
“Bruce’s kleptomaniac ex-and-sometimes-current girlfriend. Every single conversation they have is riddled with innuendo and pussy jokes that she makes, and she’s been around since Jason was knee high.”
“So she’s got stories?” Tucker asked, eyes brightening as she twigged.
Jason turned and pointed his most menacing finger at him.
“She does not have fucking stories and you do not want to talk to her, she’ll steal the filings from your teeth,” he warned sharply.
Danny’s lips moved soundlessly for a moment and then suddenly the most wicked glee Steph had ever seen from anyone not a sibling lit his face.
“Jason… she has pixie boot stories, doesn’t she?” He asked in a low hiss, and Steph’s brows shot straight to her hairline.
Jason had only ever willingly worn pixie boots for one reason. Guess things with Danny were serious serious.
So how much had Jason told him?
From the way he was now glaring warningly at Danny, and Sam was rounding on Jason with intrigue, glee, and a complete lack of understanding, it was just Danny for now.
“We’re not talking to or about Selina,” he hissed, crowding up into Danny’s space and ooooh Steph wasn’t too worried about their mutual secret to miss that cute little blush on Danny’s cheeks.
Which also didn’t stop the man himself from grinning up at Jason, even if he did have to crane his neck back to do it.
“Does she have pictures?” He asked with a genuinely wicked glee that Steph just adored.
“Pictures of you in pixie boots?” Sam cut in, crowding up to Jason’s other side.
And now Jason’s cheeks were flushing red.
“They were in fashion at the time!” He defended weakly, and Steph had to laugh at that.
“Yeah, them and mullets,” she cackled and Jason shot her a scowl too.
“Weren’t you guys supposed to be keeping an eye on someone?” He asked sharply, changing the subject like that had ever worked.
Didn’t work on Tucker either apparently, and Steph liked that in a man as the Black guy gave Jason that pure and innocent smile.
“Yeah, Bruce and the Mansons, but that part of the show’s over. Damian’ll let us know if anything happens,” he dismissed easily, and Jason scowled.
Steph braced herself for the flare of green, especially when it had already been so close tonight, and was almost shocked when it didn’t come. When was the last time Jason had glared so much without it?
Maybe Danny did know what he was doing.
The rest of their families’ secrets notwithstanding, she decided that for the moment she had to approve.
It’d be subject to change, a bat never planned against new intel, but for now? She liked Danny. He was honest, easy going, and made her brother blush in ways she’d never seen before.
There were clearly secrets, but he’d dropped a big one on them already with his own Lazarus exposure. Secrets never lasted long in this family anyway, but Steph could wait on digging for these.
She had much more important things to do, like tease Jason mercilessly.
For now, she popped up on his other side to press a kiss to his cheek and ruffle his hair again.
“Well, I’m gonna go find Dick and let him know Selina’s around. Tucker, do you wanna find Tim? If he has you beside him Vlad’s way more likely to be confused,” she added innocently.
Like Tucker’s eyes hadn’t always lit up at the chance to hang out with Tim. She’d be offended if she hadn’t also seen the appeal.
The smirk Sam shot her meant the other girl definitely knew what she was doing, and Steph took a moment to grin back.
Yeah. Getting Sam Manson’s number before the night ended, preferably willingly. Girls gotta stick together, and mercilessly bully their mlm besties.
Tucker hesitated a moment longer, clearly also dying for pixie boot stories, but in the end his nerdery won. Surprising no one.
“Yeah, we’ll go spread the word,” he agreed dramatically, like it was all down to him. Then he pointed back at Jason, utterly unintimidated by a full mountain of muscle. “But I want pictures too!”
“No one’s getting pictures,” Jason said firmly, and Steph danced carefully out of earshot.
“I know where Alfred keeps the scrapbooks,” she called in a sing song voice, and was a little surprised not to even feel anticipation when Jason lunged at her.
Teasing him was usually a careful game, something she had to put her mind into. Watching the pit, calculating his limits, ready to fully run if he broke.
But he was so fun to tease, and it felt… yeah. Nice to wind him up like Dickie or Tim, or Bruce himself. Nice not to be prepared for a sudden attack.
It wasn’t like she’d have ever stopped if he had lashed out anyway.
Danny was good for him, for whatever reason. She shot them both finger guns, heading back for the middle of the room.
“Try not to get into anything scandalous,” she called, loud enough to turn a couple heads. Which would only help their primary, Manson related plans.
Jason flipped her off while Tucker hurried after her, chuckling to himself.
“So, scrapbooks?” He asked hopefully, and Steph shot him finger guns too.
“Not tonight, but it’s happening. We need a group chat.”
“We so fucking do.”
**
Bruce was not having a fun evening.
He’d been happy Jason had found a guest to bring. Over the moon, really. He needed a life outside of his crimes.
Less happy that Jason had held out on the name of his guest, only sending it when Bruce would be too busy to properly investigate, but he couldn’t exactly blame him.
Bruce knew he could be paranoid and overbearing, his kids made sure to remind him constantly. And Jason deserved privacy.
But it had quickly become clear that “Tucker Foley” and “Pit Helping Danny” were not the same person. Whoever Jason wanted to introduce them to, it wasn’t just his mystery date.
Fortunately one had led neatly to the other, the Mansons revealing the trick quite by accident. And they’d known a lot more about Real Danny too.
None of it predisposed Bruce well to the boy.
Apparently he was reckless, lazy, trouble prone, unmotivated, and a very bad influence.
It felt fucking stupid when he knew full well that Jason was a crime lord and official serial killer, but Bruce just didn’t want him to get into any more trouble.
And if this Daniel Fenton was still half the boy the Mansons knew, there was a whole other world of shady exploits he could be dragging Jason into.
Ghost hunters. Really.
Everyone knew about Amity Park’s “ghost problem”; a cheap way to drum up tourist dollars, just like Bigfoot sightings.
They’d tried calling the Justice League out more than once, but Constantine had marked it as a no fly zone. Which meant there was nothing supernatural there worth bothering with.
The regular Justice League had no time for claims of magical mayhem.
Vladimir Masters had been interesting too, both on the Amity Park perspective and in news about Danny.
As the boy’s godfather of course his opinion could be biased, but according to him Danny was a loyal, kind hearted young man. Still rough and tumble but hardly dangerous.
And he’d been right; Bruce had plenty of experience with that type of young person. He’d soon be able to tell just what this Fenton was.
But Masters could be a useful source there, both for information and potentially sympathy. He’d seemed to understand Bruce’s concerns quite well.
Perhaps after dinner he could catch up with the man again. Make some plans, a meeting somewhere a little more private, where his children wouldn’t all be listening in.
He didn’t want to give them the impression that he didn’t trust Jason to handle himself.
He was just.
Concerned.
Jason hadn’t been himself since before they’d buried him, tangled in that mess of his birth mother. He’d done terrible things, but he’d been lost.
Bruce would do all he could to help his boy find himself again, even if that meant taking a more subtle approach. He wouldn’t let Jason be taken advantage of.
Meeting with Masters would have to wait, however, because as they’d been chatting he’d caught sight of an unfortunately familiar slinky black dress.
He’d excused himself from the adults and slipped past Damian with a meaningful look, and followed her trail through the crowds.
She slipped through easily, winding between people and Bruce could easily guess just how many would be finding their pockets all the lighter for it.
He had to go a little slower, his broad shoulders making him more noticeable and kept him from her tighter squeezes, but she couldn’t avoid him forever.
For one thing, she clearly didn’t want to. He finally caught up at the foot of the stairs to the entrance, turned away from him to admire the lion statue at the base of the banister.
“Bruce,” she greeted without turning, leaning back and just knowing where he’d be. He hated being predictable, and yet… he couldn’t disappoint her.
“Selina. I didn’t realize you were coming.” He’d checked the guest list twice today, but there were always so many plus ones. He hadn’t invited her, but that’d never stopped her before.
She tipped her chin up to smile at him, hearing every unsaid word.
“And miss young Jason’s return? Why Bruce, I’ve known the boy almost as long as you have, I’m happy to see him alive and well.” It was a gentle reprimand, and for a moment he wondered if she’d expected an invitation.
If he should have asked Jason if he’d like her there. But then, which of his children had ever liked it when Selina came around?
Not least because she always broke the rules, and he always found himself letting her. Never the most important, never the one Jason broke, but…
Selina wasn’t his weakness, he didn’t have one. But she was a distraction.
He smiled back, calculated, charming. The one she liked to see in public.
“Of course. Have you seen him?” She might have valuable insights into Jason’s condition, though she’d refused to get involved since his… original return.
Not getting caught in family squabbles. He’d always liked that about her.
She hummed softly, leaning more of her weight into his chest, hand reaching up over her head to caress his chin.
“Not yet, but I’ll say hi eventually. Rumour has it he’s growing quite the harem,” she purred, and Bruce damn near choked.
Harem? Jason?!
“Oh?” Was all he managed, and even then he knew she heard the strain when he felt a low chuckle rumble through her back.
“Word has it the young Samantha Manson and her own date are both all over him. Poor boy, and his own plus one is being borrowed by half the Waynes. What have you been teaching those boys?” She teased, fingertips running just shy of his lower lip.
Definitely feeling where it puckered slightly into one of his minimal frowns. Nothing he’d heard about this “Danny” was setting him at ease.
Still, best not to let anything too real show.
“He’s always been good at making friends,” he allowed, gaze now scanning the rest of the room for his son.
Selina chuckled again, finally stepping away and turning to face him, giving him an appreciative once over.
“Now that’s a lot tamer than what I heard. I’ve heard that they’ve already bustled off to the back rooms, and reemerged en déshabillé,” she purred, and Bruce tensed.
Jason wouldn’t. Not with a stranger. Not at a gala.
True, it wasn’t on the (long, extensive) list of forbidden gala behaviours, but that was because it didn’t have to be.
Jason didn’t like following any of his other rules.
Jason was an adult. Bruce wasn’t… a fool. He was aware that quite a few of his children had grown up. And may, possibly, in an abstract way, have a sex life.
He didn’t like to fucking think about it at the best of times, but Jason? Who couldn’t control himself, who had those unpredictable rages?
No, he did not like that thought at all. His face must have set into stern lines because Selina’s hand was on his cheek again, brushing like she could smooth them out.
“Now now, Bruce. He’s twenty-two. Remember what you were like at that age?” She cooed, and that really didn’t help.
“That’s different,” he growled, keeping to the Brucie ranges with the iron control he’d prided himself on. The control Jason lacked.
Selina examined his expression for a moment longer then shook her had, patting his face just barely shy of being a slap. He caught her hand, gaze whipping round to focus on her again.
Just what she’d wanted, of course.
“Darling, you can’t stop him. You two are on rocky enough ground as it is, hmm?” She reminded him gently, voice low.
His grip tightened on her wrist, gaze flashing across her person.
“And if I searched your pockets right now, how many stolen rocks would I find on your person?” He asked equally quietly. Not changing the subject.
Just a good question.
Her eyes narrowed for a moment, then her lips curled into a smile and she stepped closer.
“Well if Jason’s left the back rooms free, you can search me as closely as you’d like,” she purred, pressing herself to him from shoulder to thigh.
And definitely felt him twitch in annoyance, grip tightening again. He forced himself to let go, step away, before his reactions could betray him further.
“Enough, Selina. Why are you really here?” He asked sharply, carefully balancing the line between Brucie casual and the answers he wanted.
She looked him over for a moment more then shook her head, half smiling.
“Touchy touchy. I’m here to give my best wishes to Jason, darling. Nothing more. And if some of these jumped up little pheasants find their tails a little lighter for it, I don’t think you really care, do you?” She asked rhetorically, turning away to slink back into the crowd.
Bruce considered following her. Pushing for more, working out what she really wanted.
It could wait until he’d checked the back rooms. Or found Jason. Whichever came first.
—————
Part 2!
#danny fenton dead and loving it#dp x dc#dpxdc#danny fenton x jason todd#dead on main#sorry guys#it turns out 18k is over the limit#will be keeping future chapters around 15k#cuz holy shit i’m not doing this again it’s exhausting#it keeps breaking the ding dang tag list#pay attention to me dammit pt 1
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Touched by Magic: My Life on Gratitude Once Upon a Time (Part 1)
Back when I was 13 years old, I was frustrated and sad about my life. I had few friends who were mean, demeaning and toxic. I longed having good friends just like Harry had Ron and Hermione. I did not excelled at school. My grades were avarage at best. I knew I was dumb. It wasn't depression, just a perpetual fog of unhapiness at worst and boredom at best.
I don't know exactly what happened and when exactly happened, but during my last year at school (a Catholic School) somewhere, somehow I received this piece of advice: Why do you want new friends, things and events when you don't even appreciate what you do have already?
Well, color me schocked! It was true! I thought about it and decided that I was going to be happy and content and grateful with all I did have already. Sure, it wasn´t a good life, it was quite nasty at the moment, but it was my not-good nasty life, dammit!
And little by little, progressively, cumulatively, my view of my life began shifting. Yeah, my friends were mean, but that wasn't necessarily the whole truth either. We celebrated each other's birthdays, we cooperated with homework, we made us laugh out loud several times. Those things were there, it's just that I was so critical about them, about our friendship that I took those good things for something meaningless.
Yes, my grades weren't good. But they were mine! I got them fair and square. I did learned things. I had the capacity of remembering things.
Yeah, I wished to be in another school, but this one was an imperfect home, but a home nonetheless. I could appreciate its green areas, the food they offered us, how they cared for us and had our best interests at hear. How many people would like having what I had?!
And suddenly I felt happier. My grades improved. I appreciated what my teachers tried to convey me. I appreciated my classmates enough that lowering my walls and actually engaging them in a friendly way came naturally. I even won two prizes, one in 1st place and the other in 2nd, helping our class gain a reputation for winning the most prizes in the year. Teachers loved us!
I was happy and content! Not even the school year ending and every one moving to different High Schools made me feel sad.
But everything was just getting started. Life was just getting started. What happened the next three years was uncanny and wonderful.
For starters, the provisional classroom I was in was full of uncannily nice people. I was used to having a certain level of toxicity around me, but it was not there anymore. It surprised me, but what's one thing, right? C'mon! I was a little bit of luck.
My definitive classroom was even better. Funny and kind people all around! And I began making friends like crazy, and through those friends I found the 9 friends I still hang out with even to this day, four of them joined me in the medical profession even!
My grades were good, above avarage. I began having this insane wish of going to the library daily and studying. It began coming natural to me. I enjoyed it. That never happened before with such intensity.
Each day I returned home thinking and feeling wonderful about all the good things that happened to me. I counted them with my fingers every night. I cherished each thing, big and small.
Everywhere I went in school there was always someone that treated me good. People were interesting. Not just my classmates, but my teachers and other adults.
I had a crush on a boy, which was the thing that freaked me out. I feared for my life with my family. I was gay! But, feared couldn't sabotage me completely. The right ideas were with me... It was like I was being told from the inside out that everything was fine, that I was fine just as I was. The moments I spent thinking about it were always surrounded with calmness and peace. Whoever loves you truly will never leave you or hate you... And then I would spend several minutes watching the breeze soothing gently an old tree. I remember that I often spent minutes marveling at trees and nature. My High School had that in spades. I loved my new school.
Things finally took a detour for bad by the end of my first year. Gorgeous dude found out I had a crush on him and gave me the cold shoulder. We were no longer even friends. I cried a lot and spent weeks feeling sad. My family, not knowing what I was going through, took me on vacation and I had time to heal. Little did I knew that all of that was for the better as you soon will see.
I had a lot of wonderful things to think about during that vacation, so many places to visit and see. So spending time in sadness never took over me entirely. I wrote stories and wanted to be a novelist. I let myself be inspied by every thing I say those weeks. I was satisfied and happy with my hobby and passion. When I returned for my second year, I came back thinner and healthier. Everyone was amazed!
I decided that if there was ever an opportunity for me to become that guy's boyfriend (I was allowed to dream, right? Ambition comes naturally to Slytherins) then I wanted him to have a smart boyfriend. That guy was Smart, very intelligent. In my opinion, he was a keeper.
So I began feeling inspired to play with my homework, play with my notes, make school something fun instead of a chore. When studying a little bit of laws (my school had that) I studied for our exams transforming each law into Yu-Gi-Oh cards. I aced every exam I had, including that one.
To add to the fun of everything, my intuition began developing in ways I couldn't believe were possible. All kinds of freaky stuff began happening to me.
Here is a sample:
When reviewing my notes for an exam, the very answers to the exam’s questions would catch my eye. Even if I tried to ignore them, something inside would tell me to memorize them. I studied very little, but at the end I always felt a sense of peace, and sure enough I would ace my exam.
When doing an exam, if there was a multiple choice question, I always picked up the correct answer. Again, a mysterious voice would tell me which was the correct answer when I didn´t know it myself.
I would know if I could get away with not doing my homework and play video games instead. Once, two weeks passed by and the teacher did not asked us to turn in our homework. A weekend before he did, I knew inside my heart that it was time to do so. Sure enough, he asked for it.
I would always feel guided around school. Once, something told me to go to this place. There I found one of our teachers, I chatted a little with him and out of nowhere he suspended the class. Everyone was rejoiced.
I would know if someone was looking for me or if I needed to go to a certain place in order recieve something. Somehow, I was always guided to be in the right place at the right time frequently, several times a week.
School was never a chore. It was something fun. Plus, I always got to hang out with cool friends. I felt blessed, touched by a magic wand.
I could sense if someone was inside the school or not. It didn’t matter who: friends, teachers, classmates, my crush, etc. I would close my eys, sort of scan the school, and sure enough I would know. It didn´t freaked me out, but it was... weird... I was always right
When I got a chance at love was when I decided to calm down about the subject. Sure enough, I met someone that very same week. It didn´t last long, but it was something incredible. I knew what to do, say and how to act. He was my first kiss.
The guy I had a crush on never talked to me again, but I happened to catch him watching me in a most curious way many times. Regardless, one day I decided I had enough, and I logged in to my messenger account. I told myself that was the day I was going to meet my future husband. This was when I was 16 years old. I met this guy online. I decided he was not him at all, so I didn´t pursue a relationship with him. Well, he is now my actual husband having wedded thus very same year, but this is a story I will get into at another time.
Some of that reads funny, like I was a brat that only wanted to have fun and things always lined up for me to do just that and still getting very good grades. Indeed, I was top of my class. But that is my point: good feelings, love, appreciation, gratitude in particular, were the stuff that I always kept returning to, even when I was feeling bad or sad or angry. I still felt negativelym yeah, but it was so short-lived. Something inside me always told me to just let those things go, get on with my life, enjoy it, not allowing me to be petty.
Years later I would be introduced to several authors about this topic, and every thing that had to do with the Law of Attraction. I read Lynn Grabhorn´s wonderful book Excuse me, your life is waiting, and I instantly knew that was it. That was what happened to me. That was the answer to the question I had once back during my late teens. I wanted to know what was that I did, or was doing. Why God chose me? I wanted to know because my friends struggled, were quite anxious, dissappointed, and always I felt bad for them, and dirty and guilty. How could I been having so much fun when they were struggling? But I never knew what to say to them to... make things happen for them. I would listen to them, I would soothe them, I would crack a joke just to make them feel better, but it never occured to me that my chronic gratitude, joy and appreciation for life was what did the trick.
Now that I feel I know more about those year, I really want to go back. Because one day, the magic was gone. Or so I thought. I thought it left me... I pushed it away.
#GratitudeMagic#witchblr#witchcraft#witches#witchlife#laws of universe#law of attraction#lumos#gratitude#grattitude#Pop culture magick#magick
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Tag Meme
I was tagged by the stellar @astroshorts. Thanks for the tag, my lovely. xoxo
The last…
Drink: Pomegranate Seltzer Water
Phone call: I missed a phone call from my boyfriend earlier when he was at the store. The last person I actually talked to, though, was my beloved little sister (I don’t care if I’m only a minute older. She’s the only little sister I get dammit.)
Text message: Also my sister
Song you listened to: Semi Charmed Life by Third Eye Blind
Time you cried: two words: Story Core. That shit had me in tears.
Have you ever…
Dated someone twice: I have, in fact, dated Rob twice.
Kissed someone and regretted it: yep.
Been cheated on: Yep
Lost someone special: Yes. Both grandparents on my mom’s side were incredibly special people and I miss them both dearly.
Been depressed: short answer- yes
Gotten drunk and thrown up: Yep. In my early-mid twenties, I was friends with a functioning alcoholic and she would always con me into trying to keep up with her... because I was stupid, I tried. It never ended well. DO NOT DO IT. Your liver will thank you.
Three favorite colors: Blue, purple, and green
In the last year have you…
Made new friends: I joined Tumblr this year, so all my mutuals count (I think?) but I’m especially close to a few of them.
Laughed until you cried: In this house and/or with the sister I have? Absolutely. There is a lot of laughter in this house, despite the chronic depression that my entire family is plagued with.
Met someone who changed you: Yes. They didn’t make me. They just inspired me to be better and I changed for the better as a result.
Found out who your friends are: the ones who constantly support me and push me on, despite my insecurities.
Kissed someone on your facebook list: Aside from Rob (because duh), no.
Do you have any pets: A beautiful dilute torbie (cat) named Kokomo and a Shi-chon named Sadie.
Do you want to change your name: My last name eventually... maybe? I don’t know if Rob and I will ever marry... but aside from that? No.
What did you do for your last birthday: Sat at home, probably perusing Tumblr.
What time did you wake up: I’m a parent of a child on the Spectrum who keeps absurd sleeping hours... I couldn’t even begin to tell you. It was still dark and I hadn’t had my coffee yet so brain functions were at a bare-minimum, so there’s that.
What were you doing last night at midnight: Watching That 70′s Show with Rob before bed.
Name something you can’t wait for: the day I can get my drawing tablet
When was the last time you saw your mom: I live with her because Rob and I need help with Jenna. She requires constant supervision and is usually a two adults to one kid ratio requirement.
What are you listening to rn: Rob is watching Season 2 of The Walking Dead right now so lots of screaming and zombie gurgles?... it’s just kind of on in the background. So is the home screen tinkling of the PS4, the occasional popping of the carbonation in my seltzer water, and the clickity-clack of my typing.
Have you ever talked to someone named Tom: There were several “Thomas” boys in my school growing up... So occasionally from elementary school up until high school graduation.
Something that gets on your nerves: people that bully others online. -> this was astroshorts’ answer and I’m leaving it there because I’m the one who argues for or helps support the one being bullied. Anon posters get argued for because they probably won’t come out to defend themselves... hence anon to begin with... but if it’s someone who will fight back on their own? I just give support.
Most visited website: Tumblr, my Google Drive, and my Redbubble store after I’ve posted anything about it. AO3, as well, when I post stuff. What can I say? I’m addicted to the sinking feeling when a piddly amount of views come in... That’s a lie. I’m usually painfully optimistic only to have that optimism squashed. lol *shrug* oh well.
Hair Color: a medium brown.... It’s my natural color.
Long or short hair: I usually keep my hair long. an inch or two below the shoulders at a minimum. Usually it’s around the small of my back.
Do you have a crush on someone: Rob, I guess? Does it count if you’re in a committed relationship with the person?
What do you like about yourself: I’m opinionated... And whichever person hit my inbox with that comment about loving reading my opinions on stuff, I freakin’ love you. Your Anon comment made me cry.
Blood type: A Negative.
Nickname: Beccaboo. Got it in band in high school and it’s just sorta stuck.
Relationship status: Long-term committed relationship
Zodiac: Cancer sun, with Mercury and Gemini heavily influencing my whol chart.
Prounouns: she/her
Favorite tv shows: iZombie, The Walking Dead (and Talking Dead), That 70′s Show,
Tattoos: 4- A gemini sign (gemini/cancer cusp but mercury is heavy enough an influence that my cancer sun doesn’t show much) on my right shoulder, a star pattern on the small of my back, an autism one on my left side, and a locked heart on my left wrist.
Right or left-handed: depends on what I’m doing. For writing, right. For almost everything else, left.-> oddly enough, astroshorts, same.
Surgery: Tonsils when I was 6.
Sport: Horseback riding and Marching Band. Anyone who says people who march don’t have any athleticism, I call bullshit. Marching Band members put in long hours of constant marching and playing through a week. They work not only arms and legs, but lung capacity as well. It takes an incredible amount of effort to be a good marching band. That means keeping up top lung performance at the 7:59 time mark as you did before the first minute of an 8-minute show is through. I can promise you that after having marched, sometimes with ungodly spiteful step size, for that long, even a football player would be saying that what band members do takes athleticism. Fact. We had several football players in our band who had to skip their halftime talk with their coach to march with the band. And that’s not even mentioning constant playing through parade routes that can range anywhere from one to three miles in length on average. Marching Band is a goddamn sport.
Vacation: I’ve been to Australia, the Continental Divide in Colorado, all over Ohio, Washington D.C., North Carolina, New York City, Illinois, Lake Huron in Michigan, Illinois, Indiana, and the Great Smoky Mountains in Tennessee. I want to go to Greece though.
Pair of shoes: My Converse sneakers. They have a nifty design on them. I also have a super-comfy pair of stilettos that I love dearly.
Eating: what about it? I used to not and was in the “target weight range” but looked sickly because of malnourishment. Now I do eat and am somewhat overweight but look and feel much healthier. For clarity, it wasn’t really an eating disorder. I ate when I was hungry but was always stressed so I almost never ate. I would go days without eating before realizing I hadn’t eaten in forever and would eat a bowl of cereal or a couple slices of pizza.
Drinking: only on select nights when I “wine and write”... alcoholism runs in my family so I definitely don’t make a habit of drinking too much. In my youth it was something to do with the crew... now it’s just me and my characters every so often. Never to handle a problem. that’s a slippery slope I have no business being on.
I’m about to: go to bed, probably. it’s 10:58 pm at this moment.
Waiting for: the day I can get a better computer for art and my drawing tablet.
Want: the drawing tablet, in the most immediate sense. In the long term, though, it is to know that Jenna will eventually be able to make on her own. Rob and I won’t be around forever and I worry about what will happen to her when we are gone. If we can’t get her current path altered to one better suited for her needs, I’m terrified of what will happen to her if something were to happen to me and Rob prematurely... even more so when we are all older.
Get married: Maybe someday but Rob and I are in no rush to even get engaged. We love each other deeply and are in a committed relationship and that is good enough for us.
Career: Right now I’m a stay-at-home mom. But I would love to get an art career to take off... though the odds of that are slim to none.
Which is better:
Hugs or kisses: hugs. I’m picky about who touches me at all... so I’m especially picky about who is kissing me.
Lips or eyes: eyes
Shorter or taller: I’m 4 feet 10 inches tall (1.47 meters for my metric friends) so take a guess... I need someone taller to help me reach shit.
Older or younger: older
Nice arms or stomach: arms. Dear god, arms.
Hook up or relationship: relationship
Troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant... I guess? I tend to keep my nose pretty clean.
Have you…
Kissed a stranger: No
Drunken hard liquor: I’m 29...
Lost glasses/contact lenses: I don’t have either... though I probably should... It’s getting harder to see some things clearly. White lettering on a tv’s guide screen? difficult from too far away. Digital clocks? tough to decipher from too far away. I used to be able to read that stuff from another room.
Turned someone down: Yes
Sex on the first date: Yes.... but we had been friends for years so it wasn’t exactly the same as, say, a blind date that ended in a one-night stand. (No judgement. You all do you... just make sure you’re protected.)
Broke someone’s heart: Yes. Bonus points for me for two people breaking each other’s hearts simultaneously. I’m an over achiever and he was too. But I miss him, even though it could never have been... both of them, actually. timing is a bitch sometimes.
Had a broken heart: Yes... see above
Been arrested: Nope but I did grow up in a small town and worked as a third shift server at a local restaurant so they let me sit in the back of their cop car while they chatted with me while I was on break once. They were fun cops... went to high school with one.
Cried when someone died: yes... isn’t that fairly commonplace when someone who is close to you or you love dies?
Fallen for a friend: Rob was a friend for years before we started dating. I’ve known him for almost 15 years and we’ve been together for 10. Other than Rob, though, a couple times. See mutual heartbreak comment a few bulletpoints above.
Do you believe in:
Yourself: No
Miracles: I believe stuff happens that has no viable explanation at present. That doesn’t necessarily equate to a miracle though. It just means it can’t be explained right now.
Love at first sight: No
Santa claus: Who made this meme?
Kiss on the first date: Of course.
I’m going to be a fun-sucker and not tag anyone else because my primary circle is in the Dragon Age fandom and I know most of them have already done it. If anyone WANTS to do this, of course, feel free and say I tagged you so I can see your answers! <3
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Life since November 9th has been pretty exhausting and disheartening, but I think it's all starting to catch up with me. Or just piling into something overwhelming. Or something.
Stuff with my chronic illness has kind of taken the spotlight for me this month. I've been flaring multiple times a week—probably at least partially due to stress—and I just started a new medication I'd been avoiding for years for various reasons (one of them being it's injected weekly), which in theory should help significantly, but it's been emotionally exhausting. Combine that with watching the GOP dismantle ACA and knowing there's a very real possibility I may not be able to get insurance at all once I turn 26 in just over a year, and thus may not be able to treat the disease upending my life—
It's just. It's a lot.
Monday supposedly will be the day the GOP reveals their replacement plan, so I should know—soon—how much this is going to affect my future. But between this and other exhausting things happening in my life, I've become intensely aware I need to take care of myself right now.
So. Here are some self-care tips for when life is exhausting. Tips that I will be trying to implement myself.
Take as many breaks as you need. Breaks are important, and especially when you're dealing with A Lot and it starts to feel overwhelming, it's important to give yourself permission to take the breaks you need. After all, you're not going to do your best work if you burn yourself out.
Step away from social media when needed. Social media can be great sometimes for various reasons, but sometimes it can be stressful. And some days, you just don't have the energy, or emotional space, etc. to handle whatever is being discussed. And that's okay. You don't have to be there for everything.
Comfort food is delicious. I'm thinking I might make (low sugar, because sugar triggers my anxiety) brownies or something because it's been a rough week and dammit, I deserve brownies. But seriously, don't underestimate the power of comfort food, whether that's tea, soup, your favorite meal, or your some kind of dessert.
Baths and showers are good for de-stressing. And relaxing. Basically, they're nice if you let them be.
So are candles. I love candles, especially ones that smell like sweets. You are probably noticing a theme here. That's okay. Candles can be very relaxing.
Also reading. Bonus—you can work toward your reading goal! Just don't stress out about that part, because that sort of defeats the purpose of reading to relax.
Talk to uplifting friends. I can't stress enough how much it helps to have supportive people to talk to. Whether those friends are online, local, or something else, make sure you take time to talk to uplifting people in your life when you need it.
You don't have to fight every day. This has been especially important for me to remember. Especially with everything going on politically, it feels like there's always a dozen things to fight everyday—and unfortunately right now that's not really far from the truth. But you don't have to tackle everything every day. You're allowed to take breaks as long as you need. You can't fight if you've run yourself into the ground, so whenever you need to take a day or week or whatever off—do it knowing it's okay.
So that's what I've got—now I want to hear from you. What self-care tips do you have?
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8, 17, 25, 27, 29
Aww thanks another anon! :D *HUGS* Thanks for asking me! :33
http://indi-flying-with-dragons.tumblr.com/post/157125979849/get-ready-1-any-scars-4-kissed-anyone-5 the other one I answered. :)
Putting the rest of this under a read more since there’s some depressing things involved.
8. Have you ever done alcohol or drugs?
I already answered on the other one so to sum up, no I have not done any drugs. :) And the only bits of alcohol are tiny sips, because I HATE the bitter taste that cannot be masked by anything. Believe me I tried. O.e
17. What do you love?
I love dragons, cats, the dark blue shades (nothing greenish though purplish works), wings, flying, skydiving, drawing, daydreaming, listening to music, cuddling in my bed with my boyfriend for a literal Netflix and chill. :)
25. Worst thing that has ever happened to you?
I was wracking my brain about this one. I tend to repress bad memories as soon as I made it through it and focus only on the good. It helps me get through my days with the chronic illness and the spirit attacks before.
I… can’t even say what the WORST thing has ever happened to me is… It’s always either topped by something else, or negated by something awesome that came from it or happened after it… usually both… I can’t even say “when xyz died” because I moved on from the grief and only feel happy that they are at peace now…
… Perhaps the worst moment in my life that I still remember was…. my first ever energy crash in this lifetime. I didn’t know what was happening to me, I was so exhausted so suddenly, rapid decline in a span of a few short hours, trying to help my friend who had a horrible fight with their abusive mother and was looking to me for kindness and help… and I had literally no spoons to give.
All my attempts to express that and to explain that I had NO IDEA what was happening to me… was shot down and I was accused of “not caring enough to help them” and they stormed off online while I closed the computer lid and just lay there and cried so hard, wondering what was wrong with me and what was happening and trying to get some comfort that literally nobody was awake at that time to give to me.
Worst of all, I had the utter paralysis via exhaustion, inability to do more than struggle to breathe just a few short hours later, could not daydream, could not think, could not move, could not do anything, COULD NOT hear any of my helper spirits and felt myself truly utterly crushingly alone even when I KNEW I wasn’t and they were still there. I just literally did NOT have the energy to sense them, let alone hear them like I really do need to… All I could do was painfully keep my eyes closed, notice the gradual lightening up of the room as painful slow seconds turned into minutes… into hours… and just silently wordless begging to sleep for some escape, any escape, from the personal hell I had entered in.
All my other crashes after the first three worst ever ones I’ve been able to hear them and interact with them still even if I was really bad. That’s why the first three are just so infamously horrible to me. Coupled with me literally not knowing what was going on, why it was happening, and panicking the fuck out. Well when I had energy to panic that was.
…Yeah. Thanks for making me remember that. *sarcasm.*
27. Something you would change about yourself?
I already said this in the other one, but definitely my chronic illness. If I can’t then my persistent anxiety, or to somehow grow wings (like this third would be more likely than the other two? XD Hell, I can still ask! XD)
29. Worst mistake?
Huh… hmm… again I have a hard time remembering well due to my focusing only on happy memories, and with being happy after making a mistake to be able to fix it or help others, or my learning opportunity in getting better from that mistake… so it’s never really been a “negative” thing that I can remember….
… I don’t see them so much as “mistakes to avoid or cringe over” but as… “learning opportunities” to go “oh well, I know better for next time!” Or something like that. So there isn’t a “worst” mistake there really….?
Hmm… well one mistake I can think of that I wish I hadn’t done even what I did learn from it (does that count?) is changing my real name to the name I did, before I finally changed it to the one I have now. I had wanted to change my last name from the get-go but my parents were so against it out of a very strange… dislike? of it? … I had went along with them and kept my last name even if I felt nothing to it and really craved having my last name from my spirit life as something to really connect me to Home and feel more grounded HERE.
Having to explain why I was back at the name change place again so soon after the last time was something I still remember while wishing I hadn’t done it in QUITE that way. That was one hell of a mess until mom took me out and calmed me down, told me something I can say instead, and then we went back in and salvaged the situation. Even now, remembering it makes me feel really jittery all over again. -x-;;
I wish I had just went right to the name I wanted from the beginning, the name I have now. It sure as hell would make explaining the copies of different birth certificates a HELLAVA LOT EASIER if I had just the original name and the current name, and not have to explain why there’s a confusing middle stage in between. Dammit. -p-
Oh well I know now. -x- Other people, don’t do my mistake. Learn from me! Go for the name you want right off. Do the necessary talking first if needed to get the people in your life okay, and if you’re 18, remember it’s YOUR NAME and YOU can legally do the name change yourself even if they protest for some strange reason. If they threaten to not pay for the change, then find out a way you can if needed, or just wait until you talk them over and don’t go in just to appease them. -x- It’s too complicated in the end.
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Vent-
You ever online and you se someone younger than you whose better at art and cosplay and they have friends and a significant other and like all the ig followers in the world and you just look at yourself and realize that you are in the middle of a breakdown and you have to go to a job interview because me neither. Like wtf why is life like this smh why am I like this.
My thoughts are all fucked again and it’s just so unfair! People out there are making friends and being stable and getting brand deals and I’m just a failed actress having a tantrum on tumblr because it’s like screaming into the void with your three followers because like me neither...
ALL I FICKING WANTED WAS TO BE EEN TO BE HEARD TO BE LOVED DAMMIT! I put everything I have into my cosplays just to cover up the fact that I’m weak. I wanted to be an actress but no I can’t sing and chronic joint pain had to say hello! I’m so fucking kissed rn I wish I could jam a fork into my eye socket! Honestly everything I do is to overcompensate for my lack of skills. Always the extra never the lead I swear to god I’m a background charecter in my own movie. When I see charecters I can relate to I cosplay them only making minor alterations to my personality to be “canon” if people love Miss fictional bookworm WHY DO THEY HATE ME!
I can’t keep doing this anymore I will never be enough and I can’t accept that because I hold myself to impossible standards. Just why does everybody hate me why am I so alone. I never had real friends they only ever backstabbed me lied and used me not even as a child we’re relationships pure! I want to go home but I am I’m here lying in my bed wondering why god chose me as the ugly duckling.
I thought I was pretty when I got my hair done but one shower later I look like I’ve got a mullet because I’m too damn lazy to straighten my bangs! I can’t do this just let me be enough already! I can’t hurt anymore it’s taking over my mind body and soul I’m too thin too far too tall too short I AM NEVER ENOUGH! I’m stuck in the perpetual sorrowful spiral of eat sleep cry repeat! Why can’t I sleep why can’t I live my life. I don’t ask for much but the universe lives to fuck me over. I bought one thing for myself to make me happy and it’s been two months. I bet it won’t even fit and I’ll just be another failure this time in another dress
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