#It's pretty much the reason why he's got trust and control issues now because she was so manipulative and he fucking loved her

[masquenoire]

How did the model react to Roman retaliating against his parents? How did he handle that?

Circe loved it, though didn't openly show her joy when Roman fought back. The two had been having a secret relationship for years right under the noses of his parents, back when Circe was old enough to begin work as a model and Roman still a young teenager smitten with the first positive attention somebody gave him. She held Roman back from beating his parents to a bloody pulp, knowing that being convicted of murder would result in him being heavily punished by the law therefore losing Janus Comestics since his parents were still the owners of the company. It wasn't out of love or concern for Mr and Mrs. Sionis. Circe been working on wrapping Roman around her little finger for years, knowing his parents would one day replace her with a younger, fresher star once her looks began to fade. Beauty doesn't last forever and, in the world of fashion, there are always beautiful women to be found much like one would find plenty of fish in the sea. She loved the money and fame, the ease of her work in only needing to look beautiful to keep a healthy paycheck coming in. She knew it wouldn't last forever, but it could last longer perhaps, if Roman took over Janus Cosmetics and she became his partner. Circe pretended she was remorseful after the incident, that she'd end the relationship with their son once she had seen him out. Unable to bear losing their top model just yet, Mr. and Mrs. Sionis bought her lies and it was all Circe needed to enact the next stage of her plan. Roman hated his parents, she'd known for years but that night, his willingness to acquiesce to her words was the sign she needed to know he'd go to any lengths to please her and concocted a plan with him the morning after. The next night, the family home of the Sionis's burned down with his parents somehow having become trapped in the blaze. Smoke inhalation was thought to be the cause of their deaths, although their bodies had been burned too badly by the fire for pathologists to tell for certain. Circe provided Roman with an alibi and, although he had not been officially named as heir, ownership of Janus Cosmetics fell to him anyway due to being next of kin, a legal process that would be finalized by the time he was 18. Circe was very pleased with how everything had turned out, and while perhaps it happened a little sooner than she'd have liked, everything went according to plan, at least for a few more years until trouble hit Janus Cosmetics.

[biggie-chcese]

Ways I Would Change Rain Code Chapter 3, Everyone's Favorite Chapter

(let's join hands and frolic in the fields of missed potential together yayyy yippeee 🐬🌈🫧 <3 spoilers btw. this is another long ass rant/critique so warning for that too)

chapter 3 is pretty infamous for being rain code's weakest chapter but i love this game and want it to be better, so here's some changes i'd make to it. these overhauls are gonna be pretty big in some places but hey! if that's what it takes!

Part 1: The Beginning

gonna start off with saying that makoto's introduction is perfect. i would change nothing about it. he's intriguing, his exchanges with yuma are fantastic, and he lays down some nice lore and foreshadowing. no notes

AS FOR WHEN YUMA LEAVES THAT PENTHOUSE... HOO BOY

i take so much issue with the introduction of the resistance. as hilarious as it is that they kidnap yuma by simply picking him up like a piece of furniture, it just kinda ruins every subsequent interaction he has with them. he has no reason to believe a single word shachi is saying. that man can preach about non-violence all day but that doesn't change the fact that he and his crew kidnapped yuma. and if i were yuma, that would be on my mind the entire time. just from a narrative standpoint, it feels strange for him to put more stock into what the resistance says than makoto, who literally saved his life. meanwhile the resistance kidnaps him, threatens to kill him like three times, and foists a menial task on him. why is he giving them the time of day at all? just lie about taking their request and go look for your friends.

so how would i change this? it's simple: have the resistance give yuma a good first impression

picture this: after leaving makoto's place, yuma returns to where the submarine used to be. he's devastated to not see any trace of his allies and breaks down. this is where he can have his sulking session like he has on that couch after being kidnapped in canon. shinigami teases him while he's down but eventually lifts his spirits when she talks about the detective who left an impression on her. yknow. "i want to eradicate all unsolved mysteries and bring happiness to everyone!" yeah, that guy. you know him. determined to keep going, yuma gets up and decides to search around for his friends. the player has control now and can talk to several NPCs asking about them. the final NPC says to yuma, "All the gunk and trash of Kanai Ward's rivers flow down into Dohya DIstrict. If you're looking for a body, that place is your best bet." that NPC gives yuma directions to dohya district, and the area is unlocked on the map! the player can take yuma there next

when yuma steps into dohya district, he has his initial shocked reaction to the place being completely flooded. it's horrible here, but he presses on, looking around and asking a couple more people if they've seen any bodies. as he's asking around, he sorta forgets that he is a small, frail, vulnerable outsider that looks really easy to rob, and so a couple of thugs come along to remind him of that. they corner him with knives, egging him on to fork up any money he's got (which would be none. yuma's broke ass lmao) and with no other options, yuma cries out for help.

in comes the resistance! i think this is where shachi saves yuma by breaking up the conflict peacefully- quite literally practicing what he preaches (SHOW, DON'T TELL!!!). the thugs leave, and shachi asks yuma if he's okay, inviting him to their hideout in the process. this is where we can have shachi drop the lore about dohya district as they walk there together. the resistance gets introduced, and i would change very little about their introduction! however, i would leave out the parts where they threaten to kill yuma, because yuma needs a reason to trust them. and let's be honest: those scenes do nothing but unnecessarily raise stakes before fizzling out immediately. yuma can still refuse their offer for him to join them because, well, they just met. and it's still a reasonable decision for him to make without the death threats and kidnapping. maybe instead of death threats, the resistance leaders get all riled up and loud, then shachi quiets them down and tells yuma he wants to talk about the issue in private on the roof. yuma can still witness shachi get his gun through the crack in the door.

everything is the same after that, including fubuki's scene because that part is perfect. everything about her in this chapter is perfect. i think she could've had a little bit of her labyrinth development outside of it but oh well. she kinda gets that in ch 4? moving on.

Part 2: Lamp Oil? Rope? Bombs?!

i actually love the bomb threats as a concept- they add a lot of stakes to the game. however, the pacing completely ruins that. yuma wastes too much time in between them in a way that makes the bombs lose all of their urgency. so let's just cut that all out and make them yuma's first priority. let's say yuma has 15-20 minutes reach and disarm each bomb. this gives him no time for lollygagging, and he goes running around the city immediately, trying to dodge all of the peacekeepers. he can even be intercepted by guillaume and dominic at these times and narrowly escape via QTEs and detours. this still gives our culprit at least 45 minutes to enact his plan, which is plenty of time. after disarming the bombs, then yuma can return to the hideout to confront the resistance. there, he finds nobody is there except shachi's corpse, slumped against the couch, with his revolver nestled in his right hand.

shachi's clothes are wet, implying he just came in from outside before shooting himself. the safe that held the gun is wide open. nothing else seems to have been moved around. since there's no evidence of a struggle, perhaps it... truly is a suicide?

"wait that's a pretty big change" you might be thinking. or not. im not psychic. but please consider: this game has enough locked room mysteries in it, and it can survive with one less.

my idea is that this mystery should have at least one more layer of complexity to it because the entire canon mystery hinges only on icardi's escape method... i guess there's also the "suicide or homicide?" part but anyone who has ever engaged with the mystery genre will instantly figure out that shachi is left handed the very second they bring up the gun's irregular design. so why not have a situation where the body is moved? we haven't done anything like that ever since chapter 0.

my other biggest gripe with this mystery is that icardi didn't need to kill shachi at all. he could've just done his robbery and left kanai ward (or, well, tried to) without any hiccups. why kill shachi? why does the game never touch on that? i guess we could go off of icardi hating shachi's ideals but... going out of his way to kill him during his otherwise perfect heist? idk, it seems like a super lukewarm motive for all that.

so why not have shachi get in his way? shachi directly tries to stop icardi by following him in secret and confronts him at the site where he's about to bomb the hydroelectric plant. and that is where shachi dies. i think shachi's true cause of death should be drowning, since it's the best way for icardi to kill him. and how does icardi do it? well, he threatens to drown servan first. in shachi's attempt to rescue servan, icardi gets the upper hand. icardi then transports his body back to dohya via the waterways to keep anyone off his trail. he then frames it like a suicide by shooting the corpse in the head. there, he plants the gun, cleans up a bit, and leaves.

there are a number of types of evidence for yuma to deduce this later. maybe shinigami notes that the gunshot wound seems way less bloody than it should be. maybe yuma finds something belonging to shachi near the hydroelectric plant, like his necklace (maybe stuck to a grate or buried in rubble from the explosion?) along with evidence of a huge struggle. also, yuma sees multiple safes floating outside a bank near the plant. also there should be a few more red herrings among the solution keys. yuma will still interrogate margulaw to get the lore on the others, of course

i want yuma to know that shachi was trying to save servan, but i honestly dont know how to make that clear through evidence. maybe servan leaves something behind on purpose?

(yuma can meet kurumi during all this the same way too idc. i don't really think her inclusion in this chapter is necessary but w/e i wont take what little screen time she has from her. poor girl)

in the end, yuma and co get cornered by guillaume and dominic at the hydroelectric plant's bomb ruins instead of a random office, so he can get his final batch of clues right beforehand. then just before dominic crushes him into a small purple stain, he panics and goes into the labyrinth as usual.

Part 3: Down the Rabbit Hole We Go!

just a heads up, i'm changing nothing about fubuki in this labyrinth. fubuki and her interactions with shinigami are the best damn part of it, so imagine it's still there under this new format. anyway.

now i get it- this mystery still hinges on icardi's abilities. im not a mystery writer, so just imagine a lot of this stuff is more subtle than it is presented here.

let's frame it like this: the mystery casts a lot of doubt on shachi at first. from the evidence, yuma's initial assumption is that shachi did the hydroelectric bombing to send a message to the rich, then returned to his hideout and ended his own life.

as we go through the labyrinth, we first deduce that the bombs were all a diversion to keep yuma and the peacekeepers away. after that, we learn about shachi being left handed, then we deduce that this had to be a homicide. after that, we try to figure out shachi's actions before he died, eventually coming to the conclusion that he was present at the bombing of the hydroelectric plant, but if it was a homocide, someone else maybe tried to stop him. from here, we look back at how his body was discovered and figure out that his real cause of death was drowning. yuma then points the finger at icardi due to his swimming ability, and we take down his arguments accusing the others as usual.

after this, we find out his motive through actual RDM matches with his phantom instead of just mentioning it at the end of the labyrinth. through his motive, we learn more about how shachi's body was transported through the waterways and shot post-mortem at the hideout. then we can finally go to GOD shinigami mode, where icardi tries to say "this is what shachi wanted! he started the bombings and i tried to stop him. he realized the error in his ways and asked me to kill him!" but yuma counters that with the evidence servan left behind, saying that shachi has shown to be nothing but a man of peace, even til the very end.

when it's over, icardi says he hates this city and wanted to leave, but yuma scolds him on his selfishness, in how many people he endangered and how he killed a man who wanted to do some good for this world, all for money. pissed, he finishes icardi off with a silly little comic book

Part 4: Oh Yeah What About Guillaume and Dominic

imma be real with yall i do not like these two. they're just lame ass antagonists man. and maybe it's the black in me talkin but im not a fan of the dynamic where dominic, one of two characters in the entire game that's darker than a sheet of paper, is a big dumb brute whose likes include "sleeping lazily" and dislikes include "thinking," is completely loyal to this ambiguously pale little girl. i dont think guillaume herself is racist- she treats him exactly the same as her other underlings. actually she strikes me as one of those "im not racist! i hate everyone! ^w^" kinds of people and she actually means it. it's still pretty obnoxious though. sorry guillaume likers.

i'm also not even gonna accuse kodaka and the dev team of racism or colorism (though i could say something about how nearly all of the darker skinned characters in danganronpa such as akane, aoi, and yasuhiro are all portrayed as the Stupid Ones™ or the butt of a joke like daisaku from DR3 who happens to be the ultimate... farmer... ok. ok that's fine. whatever. the sole exception is sakura, an excellent character... whose appearance is still treated like a joke. also i will not complain about servan's afro + donut lips combo. i will not. do you see how all these little things build up to leaving a bad taste in my mouth? anyway im getting sidetracked). so i'll say it could just be chalked up to ignorance. either way, i think one simple fix to this is to let dominic talk... in the mystery labyrinth

a really fun payoff to his dynamic with guillaume is to simply have them swap their roles in the labyrinth. there, dominic does all of the yapping, showing he was actually paying attention to the case the whole time in the real world, and guillaume is on the sidelines occasionally making red text appear by calling yuma a little f- er- maggot. it still retains their running joke, but gives it a more memorable punchline imo. it doesn't really get rid of the weird undertones but i think it adds something to dominic that's sorely needed by showing him as smarter than he comes off as.

Part 5: The Ending

now my biggest change i'd make to this ending is making yuma recognize that he killed icardi for no reason. he... sorta does it in canon? but he's more worried about the fact that he killed icardi at all and not his trend of having a way too eager trigger finger when it comes to the labyrinth. and he hardly even hesitated either. he was so angry with icardi for killing a good man like shachi for his own selfish reasons that he mercilessly killed him for it. and i want yuma to acknowledge that more. i want him to reflect on how his tendency to just use the labyrinth the moment he feels like he's in danger is a terrible thing. please. please i want more reflection on this.

i wont change much else. however, when makoto replaces their submarine, i want there to be some consequence: all of their notes are gone. the inside of the sub is clean. the scent of yakou's cigarettes is gone. the furniture is the same, but it's all brand new. it's unsettling, but the NDA graciously accepts their new gift.

idk how much strain that'd put on the team that modeled the sub's interior, but i think it's worth it. the game needs some concept of change and consequence to it. make chapter 3 matter.

that's really all i have to say. thanks for reading!

[frazzledsoul]

rory and dean, part three: we’re really just fucking kidding ourselves at this point, or why rory does not deserve 99% of the blame for this disaster

So, OG Gilmore Girls fans may recall that Dean Forester’s ill-advised marriage to his rebound girlfriend was actually an attempt to write him off the show. Jared had filmed a pilot for a Young Macgyver show (you can watch most of it online here), but the WB ultimately passed so we (and Rory) were stuck with Dean for another year and a half. One wonders what would have happened if they hadn’t passed. Would we never have heard from Dean again? Would ASP have roped him into a few guest appearances anyway and attempted to do the same storyline? Would they just have gotten Milo to guest star for season four? Would Rory have run away with Jess in that scenario? Who knows.

Anyway, let’s revisit the issue of Dean vs Jess at the end of season four, after Rory rejects Jess’s plea to run away with him

RORY: Anyway, I left the pub, got back to my dorm, and Jess was there. LANE: What did he want? RORY: He wanted me to come away with him. LANE: Oh, my God! What did you say? RORY: I said -- I don't know. It was so weird. He was just... Jess. I mean, he shows up out of no where with this crazy proposal. It was awful. LANE: It doesn't sound awful. RORY: What are you talking about? Jess bailed on me twice. LANE: I know, but how incredibly romantic to have this guy show up out of the blue and want to take you away with him. RORY: When I first met Jess, I thought, "What could be better than this? He's smart, good taste in books and music, so cute." But Jess is great one minute and then the next - you know, as far as I know, I could have said yes, packed my bag, and by the time I got to the car, he would have changed his mind. LANE: It's part of why he's cute. He's unpredictable. RORY: I guess. You know, when I was with Dean, I always knew that no matter what happened, he would be there. LANE: Dean was very dependable. RORY: It was more than that. He's -- well, he was so... um, I was safe, and he was so nice to me. LANE: He really loved you. RORY: I think I really blew it there, you know? I didn't appreciate it. LANE: Every girl has to fall for a bad boy. It's the rule. It's the reason so many accountants eventually get married.

While this fits nicely with my headcanon that Dave eventually became an accountant, that is neither here nor there. I think this is the only time Rory really is shown processing the breakup with Jess until he shows up again in season 6 and how it led her to the Dean disaster, because as schmoopy as she gets about Dean in the twelve hours or so after she sleeps with him, it’s clear that she’s mostly looking for affirmation and stability, and not to get dragged down by feelings she can’t trust or control.

And of course, she had pretty much zero boundaries with Dean prior to this: crying on his shoulder, haranguing him about not going to college, knowing that Lindsay wouldn’t approve of him hanging out with her at night and doing it anyway. Who was going to tell her she shouldn’t do that, after the example her parents set for her over and over? Anyway. Moving on.

So, let’s go over Dean’s seduction technique, which mostly involves him lying his ass off.

DEAN: It's not working with Lindsay. I can't make it work. I've tried. RORY: Are you sure? Because I've heard that the first two years of marriage are the hardest. DEAN: We're not happy. She's not happy, and I can't make her happy. RORY: I can't imagine that. DEAN: It was a mistake, and I know that now. From the very beginning, it wasn't - RORY: Wasn't what? DEAN: It wasn't... RORY: Maybe you could, um, go see a counselor or go away together. DEAN: No, it's just -- it's over. We both feel it. I know we both feel it. RORY: You and Lindsay? DEAN: Yeah, me and Lindsay. RORY: You both feel it's over? DEAN: I tried. We tried. RORY: Well, if it's over, I'm sorry. DEAN: You are? RORY: I'm sorry you're not happy. DEAN: I'll be happy again. Things happen for a reason, right?

Not to completely absolve Rory for all of this as she definitely should have gone on more than Dean’s word, but he absolutely lied to her face after she gave him three chances in a row to come clean. He made sure to follow her to her house, where she would be alone, and manipulated her into having sex with him. Yet somehow Rory is shamed for being the seductress who tempted him into breaking his vows.

Let’s move on to Lorelai, who is actually speaking sense on matters of morality, for once.

LORELAI: But he's married. RORY: You don't understand the situation. LORELAI: Is he still married? RORY: Yes, but - LORELAI: Then I understand the situation. RORY: It's not working out between them. They're not happy. LORELAI: Oh, Rory. RORY: He tried the best he could, but it didn't work. It's over. LORELAI: [ Sighs ] He told you that? RORY: Yes. LORELAI: He told you he's leaving her? RORY: Well - LORELAI: He told you he's moving out, they're getting divorced, he's got a lawyer, they've divided up the monster-truck season tickets? RORY: We didn't get around to discussing everything.

Yeah, Rory, because he lied and told you exactly what he needed to so that you would fuck him. He never actually made any steps towards leaving his wife, and he won’t until he’s forced to,

RORY: He's not a married guy. He's Dean -- my Dean.

LORELAI: He's not your Dean. He's Lindsay's Dean. You're the other woman. RORY: I told you, it's over. LORELAI: It's not over until he's out of the house with the ring off. RORY: He took the ring off. LORELAI: Oh, my God, I don't believe this. RORY: He's in love with me, not Lindsay. LORELAI: Does Lindsay know that? RORY: She's not good for him, okay? She lets him quit school and work himself to death and - LORELAI: No, Rory, uh-uh, you can't be one of those girls who blames the wife for forcing the husband to cheat.

Funny how Lorelai was exactly like that when Christopher was having problems with Sherry and not only slept with him before he had moved out or officially broken up with her, but bragged about it to Sookie, paraded him all around Stars Hollow, and let everyone she knew about their burgeoning relationship, including her parents. It would be strange if that happened to come up again, right?

LORELAI: This is your first time. It's just not the way your first time was supposed to be. RORY: Oh, and how was my first time supposed to be? LORELAI: Well, first of all, it was supposed to be in a retirement home. And secondly, ideally, it was supposed to be with someone single. RORY: My first time was with someone sweet and kind who loves me. LORELAI: I didn't raise you to be like this. I didn't raise you to be the kind of girl who sleeps with someone else's husband. RORY: You slept with dad when he was with Sherry. LORELAI: He wasn't married to Sherry. RORY: He was engaged, and she was pregnant. LORELAI: So, this is all my fault? I set one crappy example for you, and you have no choice but to follow in my footsteps?

They’re basically one of those old anti-drug PSAs. I learned it from watching you!

I mean, it’s not like Lorelai badgered and pressured Rory into staying with Dean when her attention drifted to Jess and constantly argued for his innate superiority over and over and over.....oh wait, she totally did that. It’s not like Lorelai failed to sit Rory down at some point and explain that the reason their hearts got broken over Christopher not breaking up with his girlfriend is because sometimes when you sleep with other people’s boyfriends, they opt not to choose you in the end. Oh, wait, she didn’t do that, either, because he was her Christopher and they’ve always been connected. So she’s completely entitled to not take any responsibility for that situation and try to vandalize the other woman’s bathroom at her baby shower because she was jealous.

So, let’s just say I kind of understand why Rory gives Lorelai the cold shoulder here. Who is she to lecture, given her track record? And we know it’s only going to get worse.

Before we move on from this, though...

RORY: He was my boyfriend first! LORELAI: But you dumped him! You rejected him! You picked someone else!

Okay, technically it was Dean that dumped her (apparently I am the only one who remembers this) but as much as Rory pretends that Dean was the perfect boyfriend, both of them are significantly overidealizing the halcyon days of their early relationship. They were together for three months, and only reconcile when Rory is badgered into saying that she loves him: then it’s a few more months until Jess shows up and Rory loses almost all interest in Dean whatsoever. So the perfect love that they claim to want to relive never really existed.

Okay, let’s move on to how Dean actually treats his wife he claims to Rory he was completely in the process of breaking up with prior to him boinking his ex.

Upon learning that Lindsay had committed the unpardonable sin of answering her husband’s phone:

DEAN: I mean, you know it's my phone, Lindsay. This isn't your phone. I mean, who was it? LINDSAY: I don't know. They hung up. DEAN: So you didn't take a message? LINDSAY: I told you -- they hung up. DEAN: So, great, uh, you're just answering my phone and not taking messages? That's great, Lindsay. LINDSAY: Dean, wh-- DEAN: Taylor calls on this phone, and Tom. I mean, this phone is for business, okay? That's why I have it! LINDSAY: Fine. DEAN: What if Tom called, and he had an extra shift for me tomorrow, huh? I mean he calls to tell me, and you answer, and he thinks maybe he doesn't have the right number, and he hangs up, and then I just lose out, which means we lose out. God, Lindsay, you know, you don't -- you don't get it, do you? I mean, you have absolutely no respect for me at all. That's just obvious. LINDSAY: I don't want to fight. We always fight. I won't answer your phone anymore. I was asleep. I didn't think. I'm sorry, okay?

Jeebus, she completely sounds like a battered wife here. What a prince Dean is, huh? And yeah, Dean completely doesn’t sound like someone who’s trying really hard to cover his tracks.

Let’s move on. Rory overhears Lindsay trying to prepare dinner in the hopes of smoothing things over with Dean, and she finally accepts that Dean has not left his wife and at this point likely has no intentions to. She writes a break-up letter for Lorelai to deliver to him.

LORELAI: It's a letter for you from Rory. DEAN: What happened? Where is she? LORELAI: Just take the letter. DEAN: She went to Europe, right? Miss Patty said she went to Europe. What happened? What's she doing there? Who is she with? LORELAI: Dean. DEAN: When's she getting back? LORELAI: Soon. Just take it. DEAN: Where is she? LORELAI: Europe. DEAN: With who? LORELAI: Her grandmother. Look, take it. DEAN: No. Why did she go? Whose idea was it? LORELAI: That doesn't matter. DEAN: It does.

Dean, are you still married? Then it’s none of your business who Rory is with. Fuck off, sir. You have no right to ask anything of her.

Lindsay finds the letter and finally gives Dean a small taste of what he deserves.

LINDSAY: I hate you, Dean! I hate everything! DEAN: Let's just talk. LINDSAY: I don't want to talk! I don't want you here! DEAN: I'm sorry, okay? LINDSAY: Sorry? DEAN: Yes, because it'll never happen again.

Sure sounds like a guy who really, really wants to leave his marriage and totally didn’t feed Rory a bunch of bullshit to get her to do what he wants.

Lindsay kicks Dean out and her mom and Lorelai have a blowout in the middle of the street while their kids stand by silently like the teenage girls that they still are.

MRS. LISTER: You! You should be ashamed of yourself -- what you did! LORELAI: Just wait. MRS. LISTER: What did she ever do to you, huh? How did she hurt you? Why are you doing this? LORELAI: Theresa, please. Calm down. MRS. LISTER: Calm down? My little girl has to come home and find your heinous letter in Dean's jacket. LORELAI: Listen, we're in the street -- MRS. LISTER: You little monster! LORELAI: Hey! Pull back, lady! MRS. LISTER: There aren't hundreds of other boys in the world? You have to go after her husband? LORELAI: Okay, stop attacking my daughter right now. You're upset, I get it, but you do not do this. MRS. LISTER: She slept with my son-in-law. She broke up a marriage. Are you proud? LORELAI: She did not break up a marriage. MRS. LISTER: What do you know of this? LORELAI: Enough. I know Rory. MRS. LISTER: All I know is that now my Lindsay is devastated, Dean is back with his parents, lives are destroyed, and you and your daughter can go to hell!

Okay, first of all, this was a predictable end result when two teenagers who don’t know each other that well decide to get married at the age of eighteen. Why did their parents, especially Lindsay’s mother encourage this? And what the fuck is up with blaming Rory for the situation completely? No, she shouldn’t have done it, but Dean is the one who decided to marry Lindsay. He’s the one that decided to cheat. He’s the one that decided to lie to both of them. He is not an innocent bystander. 

Later on, Rory tries to comfort Dean over what has happened.

DEAN: No. It's not a stupid question. Um...let's see. How do I feel? Actually...I feel like an idiot. RORY: Why? DEAN: Why? Because I was married, …Rory. Married. And I threw it all away for someone who dumped me once and then just bailed on me. RORY: I didn't just bail. I -- DEAN: I hurt everybody. I hurt Lindsay, I hurt her parents, I hurt my parents, and now I'm back at home, and you're in Europe with your grandmother. And what the hell was I thinking? I mean, what am I doing? What's wrong with me?

I mean, the correct answer here is that everything is wrong with you, Dean, but....in the first place, Rory didn’t dump you, second of all, and she “bailed” because you lied and had no intention of leaving your wife in the first place. Take responsibility for your own actions, my man.

Rory and Dean eventually date for a month or so. Dean dumps her again because he realizes they have nothing in common. Does he take any steps towards moving on with his life and taking responsibility for his own mistakes? 

DEAN: Your situation is no different from mine. Buddy. LUKE: I've got work to do. DEAN: Then go. They want more than this. Don't you see that? And all you are is this. LUKE: Rory was a kid, Dean. She grew up. She moved on. Accept it. DEAN: You accept it. This town, it's all you are, and it's not enough. She's going to get bored, and you can't take her anywhere. You're here forever. LUKE: It's different. DEAN: It's not different. You and me. Same thing.

Bear in mind this episode takes place in April and Dean dumped Rory the previous November, and yet he’s still bitter, still projecting onto Luke, and still completely blaming Rory for all of his own decisions. He was the one who dumped her the first two times. He was the one that got into a fight with Jess on her behalf. He was the one who proposed to Lindsay to get her to forget about it. He was the one who got married despite his reservations. He was the one who lied to Rory so that she would have sex with him. He was the one who refused to leave his wife. And oh yeah....he was the one who dumped Rory a third time.

That’s the last we see of Dean for eleven years until he shows up in the revival and actually seems emotionally stable for a change.

Somehow Rory gets the brunt of the blame for all of this, but she wasn’t in this alone. I do think she was scared into this by Jess showing up, and if he had any sort of explanation or apology for her either of the times he showed up, she probably wouldn’t have been so vulnerable to the affirmation that Dean offered her. Then she could have had a disappointing first experience with Marty as an alternative.

Which still would have been an improvement over the horror of that Candyman song.

[jibbi]

After: Tessa is just as toxic as Hardin

I'm totally late on getting into the After series, but I recently watched all the movies and am now reading the third book (don't come for me. I know I should've read all the books first lol). I am very passionate about this series, including all the extremely messed up parts of it. I could talk about it for days lol

I think something that isn't talked about is Tessa being just as toxic as Hardin when she absolutely is.

As a disclaimer, yes, Hardin is absolutely awful for how often he changes his mind, yells, breaks things, and punches people in his own family when he feels hurt by what they did. Completely unforgivable behavior, and so incredibly unhealthy. But, at least we have a full understanding of why Hardin's mental and emotional health is as terrible as it is - he has an immense amount of family and personal issues, and he keeps finding out more terrible things as the series continues. To clarify, it does NOT by any means excuse his behavior, I am not saying it does - he is still 100% accountable for his own behavior and not taking care of it - but his background gives understanding as to why he tends to act so terribly.

As for Tessa, although we're given a backstory about her controlling mother and alcoholic/druggie father which gives reason to her behavior, she's somehow liked so much more than Hardin and gets away with a lot. Sure, she doesn't get violent and break things when she's upset, but her emotional behavior and communication skills are absolutely horrendous, plus she sometimes DOES get drunk like Hardin as a coping mechanism. She also often tells Hardin that she doesn't trust him, when Hardin shouldn't be trusting her either. Why? Well let's get into it.

Tessa cheats

Tessa started off her relationship with Hardin by cheating on her boyfriend from home and lying to him about seeing Hardin. She DID realize she was mainly staying with Noah because she feels she owes it to him. She also wanted a serious relationship which Noah was providing while Hardin was still screwing around, and she was the ultimate people pleaser towards her mom who got along with Noah.

Not only did she cheat on Noah, but she was being flirtatious with other guys and allowing other guys to be flirty towards her while she was still with Hardin. God forbid they got into a fight and she anticipated a breakup in the near future, Tessa would be so quick to jump to another guy. There was Trevor, Zed, and Robert the waiter who she got flirty with real quick once there were issues between her and Hardin. She even forced a kiss upon a random guy at the New Year's Eve party in After We Collided, just because she jumped to the conclusion that Hardin was cheating on her (when he wasn't)!

Tessa is so quick to assume Hardin is cheating on her on so many occasions, yet she herself has cheated multiple times. It's so ridiculously hypocritical.

Tessa hides things from Hardin

Despite Tessa calling Hardin out for hiding things from her and snooping through his things to find evidence, she does the same thing. I'll give a couple of examples.

Tessa hid the fact that she was keeping in contact with Zed despite Hardin making it very clear to her that he doesn't feel comfortable having her talk to Zed. Yes, Tessa can be friends with whoever she wants since Hardin doesn't control her life, however, the difference is that Zed has feelings for her and Tessa flirted with him at one point. I feel it's pretty normal to not want your partner to spend time with someone who likes you as more than a friend. Hardin of course could've been much less controlling when it came to this, but I can't blame him for being upset over it, especially since Tessa would most likely react the same way (just less violently) if Hardin was hanging out with a girl who had feelings for him.

Tessa also hid the fact that she was moving all the way to Seattle, and he figured out by accident that she made this decision. That is a HUGE thing to keep from your significant other. Deciding to move to an entirely different city two hours away when you're in a committed relationship while NOT telling your significant other is crazy. I get they weren't together for a short span of time, which is when Tessa made the decision to move to Seattle. But, once she got back with Hardin, telling him would've been the right thing to do.

Tessa doesn't compromise

Speaking of her deciding to move to Seattle, Tessa automatically assumes Hardin will oblige and come with her, or eventually change his mind. Hardin always made it very clear that he had no intention of moving to Seattle, despite it being where Tessa dreamed of living.

Both Hardin AND Tessa did not want to come to any sort of compromise despite dreaming of a future together. Hardin wanted to move back to London, Tessa wanted to move to Seattle. Neither were willing to come to any sort of compromise on where they should live, even though they're so in love with each other.

What's also terrible is that so many people are siding with Tessa that he should've moved with her and Hardin is in the wrong for not sticking by her, knowing Seattle was her dream. Yes, Hardin was absolutely wrong for going behind her back to call her real estate agent and destroy her potential housing plans in Seattle. BUT, he wasn't given a choice in the first place, it was either move there with her or never see her again. That's crazy. Despite him doing such a terrible thing, Tessa was not right for the lack of compromise either.

Conclusion

I love this series, but it has been bothering me a lot how Tessa is seen as such a "good girl" and doesn't see herself as a big problem in the relationship too. I had to rant about it.

Anyhow, thank you for reading this. I'm willing to debate characters or any part of this series. Go off if you want to LOL

[cult-of-the-eye]

tell me about ur horror comics please

horror comics rant part 2 electric boogaloo:

thank you lovely people once again for asking me about the horror comics it is much appreciated and got me through my studying!!

so the second one i got way too obsessed with is called the guy upstairs!!

we open with a character who is joining my group of "all time faves, itches my brain" characters, a girl named rozy

(its set in malaysia)

she is an orphan, who grew up in an orphanage but is now in college and in her own apartment

it's not exactly the best apartment, she works a couple of cleaning jobs to afford it, but it'll do

she's got a friend named hawa, who is literally the sweetest

she's very popular, cause she's both nice and very very pretty and lots of people are like how are they friends

now for all you "get your dog under control" (they're talking about a human) fans, you are gonna go CRAZY

rozy is insanely protective over hawa, which seems to be a theme all throughout

basically, rozy doesn't really get ill, but when she does it gets real bad - nightmares, fevers etc etc

so one day when rozy accidentally walks into her upstairs neighbour's flat and witnesses him brutally murder a woman

she thinks that's just another nightmare or a product of the medicine her boss gave her to help with her headache

but she knows what she saw. and she refuses to trust him.

thus begins the most TENSE game of cat and mouse ever

rozy knows that adam (the neighbour) is a killer, but no one will believe her, she's been tagged as crazy before and will be again if she brings it up

and adam knows that rozy knows, but he also knows that he can't kill her, cause it'll be traced right back to him

so what does he do? tortures her emotionally

he starts to date hawa

a policeman looking for his sister (who fits adam's victims' MO) becomes friends with rozy, trying to give her advice on the situation (they have a sibling relationship by the end its really sweet)

together, they realise that what he does is date slim, fair skinned women with long brown wavy hair and then kill them

so hawa seems to be in grave danger

rozy does everything she can to try and break them up, without looking insane

(it doesn't work)

it gets to the point where adam proposes and hawa cuts off rozy for being too suspicious and clingy, while rozy thinks hawa is too easily trusting but can't say why

finally they talk again after a suspicion she had about a classmate turns out to be true

and hawa decides to help rozy find proof that adam is a serial killer

the reason why i'm so obsessed with this is because rozy is such a compelling character like honestly. she's smart, she's rude, she's highly independent, she's funny, intensely loyal and has massive abandonment issues. like girl is adamant that she is fine and ok and not traumatised and that her way is the best way to go about things, which it is in this case but not because she's right, she's just right in this extreme situation. i just love characters that seem reasonable but are one threat to their loved ones away from batshit insane.

[dipolardruid]

hey, love your works!

But I've been low-key interested about the Popular kids backstories, mayhaps get a bit of lore abt them? 😳 thanks in advance btw!

Hey! As for their backstories their a little complicated to say the least.

As mentioned before they are all childhood friends since their parents were all neighbors, which is how they all met. It would be because of this and their parents high standings that they ultimately end up arranging who would marry who.

Which they were told since they were young, Tina would marry Paul while Jake would marry Petra it was never an issue with them and they were more than happy to carry it out.

The main reason for this would be the experiments done to them which they would often comfort and depend on eachother after each one especially the most unpleasant ones. This of course would cause a very tight bond between them that is unbreakable so trust and believe that some have tried breaking them up and suffered the consequences.

So really it didn't matter to them as long as they all were together at the end of the day.

The experiments that were conducted ranged from how long they could run, scream, hit, or be hit as they got older the experiments would start slowly turn more aggressive and demanding.

Which is why they're all so protective of eachother especially when they are out of the experimentation labs, There was actually a fifth member before you were involved but would ultimately get taken away by the foundation to be out of society due to them being seen as very dangerous to society despite never doing any harm.

They would also be told to merge with human society more which is where their main points would come.

Tina enjoys dancing and having more high intense activities happen so she became a cheerleader, Paul of course with his superior strength would go on to join sports with other shifters where he could release all his energy and aggression.

Petra liking order and control will be a class president kind of thing and have more of a standing with authority and jake due to his mind reading abilities is able to be a very big charmer and have a very big standing among the students.

So it's all works out, I've gotten into their backstories a little above but it's still in the making, I'm open to any ideas given to me. Right now everything is in draft you all are simply helping me flesh them out and writing in the blanks.

For example their family lives are still being figured out Tina's personal life is pretty much decided it's the other three especially paul is where I'm struggling a little bit with but that's why I've got you lovely people to help me :)

Request are open!

[m34gs]

There was a 'put in the tags' post requesting people put in the tags a villain with a "good reason" to be evil...and I just thought that seems very subjective and also how can I just choose one...so I am gonna just ramble a little about some of my favourite villains/antagonists and why I like them so much :D (link to the 'in the tags' post here)

Not every villain needs a tragic backstory or a 'sympathetic' motivation, and I think you'll find that very few of my favourites actually do. It's 2023. Let the villains be actually evil. Potential for spoilers ahead.

These are not listed in any particular order; just listing them as I think of them:

Ursula (from The Little Mermaid)

I love Ursula. She's just so unapologetically herself. The only time she changes herself to fit 'societal norms' is to trick the prince. And even then, she isn't doing it out of lust for him or to fill some sort of need to fit in; she's doing it as a means to an end, that 'end' being having Ariel to use as a hostage against Triton. This lady is cunning, she is confident, and she takes what she wants. I loved her as much in the cartoon as I do in the recent live action movie; both versions were good. (whether you like the makeup or not, I don't care, the live-action Ursula was hilarious). She gets the trident, the power over the seas, and what is the First Thing she does? Tries to smite Ariel because she hates her, and also Ariel is the reason her beloved eels perished. Ursula wants immediate revenge. Love that for her. She has her priorities.

The Sheriff of Nottingham (from Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves)

He's played by Alan Rickman. That's it. That's the reason. LOL. I mean, I love the way that Mr. Rickman brought the character to life, I loved the comedy, the dry and dark humour he brings to the role. I just really love it. And he looked very handsome as the Sheriff, I must say. Also, the Sheriff's death scene always kinda makes me giggle just because it is So Drawn Out. Like, my dude. Die already!!!! But nope, gotta stumble around the Entire Tower Room first.

Eddie Gluskin (from Outlast: Whistleblower)

Eddie is, by the time Waylon Park stumbles across him, completely deranged, completely twisted, completely unhinged. He is running around chasing other prisoners to take them as 'brides', and cutting off the parts of them he doesn't desire. He makes a wedding dress. He has a tailored suit that he *wears*. He sings songs that he likely learned in his childhood, about marriage and love. Now, if there's one thing I love, it's a villain with a THEME. Also, this man did all this within the span of hours. HOURS. That is some crazy productivity...like holy shit. I know people who do less over the course of an entire week; AND get paid for it. Eddie was like 'hold up I got this' and prepared a wedding while doing some..."art"... on the side.

Usagi (from Juuni Taisen: Zodiac War)

Similar to Eddie, Usagi is just. Wild. A beast. I mean, it makes sense. He's in a 12-man battle royale where the winner gains whatever wish they desire. We don't get much on backstory for Usagi but I honestly think that's just fine. You can tell from his appearance and several of his voice lines that he hasn't had many friends...but when he kills the corpses reanimate and are completely under his control. "Friends" that can never run away. It's kind of fascinating to me, that he has so many trust issues he can't fathom having any friends that he can't 100% control. Also, he is in the skimpiest bunny outfit, complete with a giant tail to store his swords in, and stiletto heels. Iconic shit.

Sukuna (from JJK)

What I like about Sukuna is he is so evil and ready to kill and destroy...aaaaand he's stuck in the body of a teen who can somewhat limit his abilities and keep him locked away for the most part. Gotta love that frustration. Also, even though Yuuji has Sukuna inside him, they undoubtedly talk a lot, and pretty much have to be civil to each other...Sukuna still does not give Any Fucks about Yuuji's happiness. The cruel reminder comes when Sukuna refuses to save Junpei (My Baby!!!!😭😭😭), and honestly despite the fact it made me cry, I absolutely respect the writing that has a villain stand by his convictions. Don't get me wrong, I am a SUCKER, for character development and the villain becoming part of the Found Family whether they like it or not (which is how I write Sukuna in The Bar AU), but I also love and adore when a writer will Go There and be like "Yeah, no, you're not changing this guy so easily. He's evil." (I am nowhere near caught up with the manga but so far in my current observations this remains to be very true).

Azula (from Avatar: The Last Airbender)

This girl is so iconic. I love her methods. I love the outward confidence and the crazy consequences she doles out that are really just hiding a scared young girl with a perfection complex. I love that we get a such a rounded character; that we as the audience see her fail at flirting, see her lose her temper over trivial things, see her enjoy a day AT THE BEACH?! UNIRONICALLY???? Azula is just such a great character. When she loses her battle at the end and goes batshit spitting fire while bound...My heart. It aches for her. Even though I think she needs a whole lotta counselling. Truly.

The witches (from Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters)

I like the witches because they are just. Evil. (yes I know there's a 'good witch' in the story, but I'm not talking about her right now). I like that they fully commit to the evil. They feast on children. They kill without remorse. They cast disgusting and foul curses that cause some really gross gory scenes. I just like that return to a character who is just Evil and will never be good or be persuaded under any circumstances to act good. I thought, in an era of "pretty" witches who all seem to be "morally grey" at worst, it was fun and refreshing to have a witch just go "Nah, I want to eat a child" again.

Those are some of the ones I can think of right now. I just wanted to ramble a little about them. :D

[rickie-the-storyteller]

Happy last STS before Halloween! What scares your characters? Feel free to keep this goofy, silly, fun or go serious and/or dark with it! Whatever Reese's your pieces. (Okay, I was trying to be funny there, but it's just ridiculous. 🤦‍♀️)

Hello, friend! Yes, I am aware of the fact that it's been a week since Halloween lol.

Thanks a bunch for the interesting question! Imma answer it now:

For the Steph's Crew main cast:

Stephanie:

Steph is afraid of a lot of things. She's just not super obvious about it most of the time.

Growing up, she was super scared of spiders (a pretty common fear, I know. But this is something I took from my own life. Everyone in my house hates spiders lol. My younger sister especially!), but she got over it as she got older (same as me. The rest of my family kind of made me the designated spider handler person because I've grown to be so indifferent of their presence haha).

She has nightmares about traumatic events that have happened in her past (e.g. in book 1, there's a lot surrounding her deceased foster sister Melanie. The memories keep haunting her, and the nightmares cause her to vividly relive the moments she left things unresolved with her, as well as the rest of her foster family that she abandoned.

Aside from all that, she also has a fear of abandonment (and loneliness in general). Her past in the foster care system intensifies these fears. She's spent her entire life not feeling wanted or belonging anywhere and has a warped idea of what real love is because she hasn't really experienced a lot of it. I think this is why she makes a lot of the mistakes she makes (like her infidelity in book 2, for instance. Not justifying anything, but her cheating on her spouse feels like her just enjoying the fact that multiple people 'love' her and want her, and getting lost in that feeling of positive attention. For all of that outward confidence she tends to exude, she has a lot of deep insecurities about whether she's truly loveable or not, and whether or not she's truly deserving of happiness. So she constantly sabotages herself... which is a huge part of her arc throughout the series).

Bret:

Bret has the same fear of loneliness that Steph has. He hates feeling like he's alone in the world. This has always been the case with him, but I think losing both his parents may have intensified this fear. He just feels better when he has people to talk to (he's kind of been broken down over the years, mainly due to forces outside his control, but I'd say he's a natural extrovert at heart. This is another thing that contrasts with Elise - known for her kind, sweet and friendly personality, but is a natural introvert at heart and prefers to spend time alone), especially when he deeply loves, trusts and cares about them. I think this is why he clings to El so much throughout the series... she's always been there for him, you know? The thought of her not being there is scary to him. This goes for all his other friends as well to an extent. He's just afraid of losing loved ones tbh.

He also has trust issues and trouble relying on people due to being disappointed one too many times by people he thought he could trust (which is a big part of why he hates his uncle so much lol. Though to give him credit, he genuinely tries to get over his own animosity towards Gordon and give him a chance in the future instalments, especially once Rachel gets back with him).

For a while, he was scared of learning how to drive. People around him took it as him not being bothered to learn how, but in reality, he was always kind of anxious about it for some reason (he could never explain why, but this may also have something to do with his parents. For a long while after their death, he was haunted by the nightmares of the car accident that took his parents' lives, similar to Steph's dreams about Mel).

Elise:

Failing all her exams and not getting into university lol.

Jumpscares in horror films. And just horror films in general (this is another thing that I took from my real life lol).

Getting into a massive fight with her parents and essentially being cut off from her family like her brother was. Now that I'm thinking about it, this could perhaps be why she tries so hard to reach their high expectations of her. And why she tries so hard to be understanding of their rules and get along with them all the time, even when she disagrees with them. She doesn't want to end up like Adam (who is happier now that he has independence, even if he doesn't have a ton of direction in life. But she loves her family and wants to always be connected with them). She doesn't want to lose the close relationships she has.

Dylan:

The dark. Especially when he's alone. (Yet another thing taken from real life lol. I used a nightlight for far too long...)

The fear of the unknown, especially concerning his family's future after his parents' divorce and his mother's upcoming marriage. Nobody knows how life will go, or what the future's going to be. This is interesting, because it kind of relates to Alice's fear (more on that later).

Getting cheated on (it doesn't happen to him, but it's something he mentions to Bret in a conversation in book 2 haha).

Alice:

Injuring herself so badly that she can never dance again.

Being forgotten. You know, since she's always been known for being 'forgettable.'

Falling in love with the wrong person. Never finding her true identity or purpose. Basically, making the wrong choice in life and having to be miserable forever because of it. I think this is a pretty relatable fear... and it's something I've taken from real life as well. My parents are divorced, and my mother struggled a lot during the marriage. That whole thing put a lot into perspective for me - there is so much that could go wrong in life... it's easy to make the wrong choice. You might meet someone who can just turn your whole world upside down (and not in a good way).

Most of all, she's scared that she won't grow to be her own person outside of being a twin. That she will forever be in the shadow of her highly talented twin sister, Mary. Even after Mary dies.

Other characters:

I just thought these ones would be interesting...

Mack (five seconds flat) - Public humiliation.

Eurydice (AU) - Her family finding out where she is.

Zephyr (AU) - The world ending up like how it is in Wall-E.

There we go! Hope this answers your question, @toribookworm22. Thanks again for the ask!

[tokyoleo]

HE'S SO MUCH MORE THAN JUST A SHITHEAD FOR REAL!!!

I'm not afraid to say that he's my #1 favorite. He's so much more complex than just an asshole already (if you spoil yourself some voice lines a bit)

I feel a bit nauseous when I see people genuinely, and I mean GENUINELY hate him. Being annoyed at him is a given, that's normal, he literally wants to be annoying. But as you said, he's got a lot of traits that people should analyse and focus on more.

I understand that him trying to cast MC out by scheming and lying is far from attractive, but I think people forget that he's so unbothered by the turns of events because in the end, there were no consequences. His plan worked, MC didn't die, and all he got was a glare from Sho. He's not right in the head; he doesn't dwell on the fact MC could've died because she didn't, he's right, and he mostly got what he wanted. It is not, however, proof that he's completely heartless and doesn't give a fuck if MC dies. I think that if MC died during that mission, if things didn't go his way, Leo would've turned into a true fucked up broken man. Might blame Sho to protect himself psychologically, if we're being honest.

I think that MC's personality and her title as an inspector was what prompted Leo to try to push her away as far as possible. She's meek, gets pushed around easily, she has no talent to speak of and was thrown into this mess because of shit luck, not because she did anything 'interesting'. Leo doesn't pity people like others do, so there was nothing prompting him to care or respect her at all, so he tried to fix the issue that was MC by pretending she's useless.

It's through his text messages and voice lines that you can really get a better understanding of Leo. (for now)

He's extremely motivated by proving people wrong, getting away with the unthinkable and receiving validation primarily by annoying someone or getting a bad reputation and then making them change their opinion of him. Just, being right.

I relate to this a lot and I think that it's perhaps because he doesn't see value in respect, kindness, compliments or anything he hasn't earned or fought for.

When someone is being kind to him, he's pleased, but he also doesn't care. When his posts pop off, he's annoyed and mutes them. Whenever anyone is being nice to him (gifts, compliments, anything really), he turns around and finds a way to be smug, dismissive about it or make it seem like he's forcing them to. When he does something nice in return, he also tries to be a little shit about it. Leo is literally constantly dismissive of pretty much everything. Even his max affinity voice line is him trying to get the upper hand somehow.

I think all of that is a big reason why he's stuck to Sho and later on Alan; Sho often criticize him so Leo's got something to prove. He's earned all of it, Sho doesn't give respect on a silver platter. Unlike Subaru. Alan is a tough nut to crack, too. He won't swayed by just anyone.

He's so interesting, and I literally CAN'T wait to get more info about him, any crumb at all. HE HAS SO MUCH POTENTIAL AND Y'ALL ACTING LIKE HE CLIMBED OUT YOUR SCREEN AND KICKED YO DOG-

Leo is a demonic gremlin, but I wish him contentment and peace the most, I really do. His behavior reminds me of myself a lot and I can assure you that it could all be much, much, much worse.

I wonder if the story will keep him down that path, make him work on himself just a little tiny bit maybe, or break him...

Also I want to sequence his DNA, print it, blend it, and then drink it.

Edit: pointed out by another user - this man got trust and control issues actually

same tehe <3

Have some unprocessed thoughts about Leo.

Aha here I am with a fucking MICROSCOPE going to dissect this man and his entire being (aha I used to do character analysis for funsies on other platforms). And man-

Can I just say he has all the signs of a character who’s fucking Tragic™ tbf all the ghouls are

But dude is literally on a fucking self-destructive path and I’m here for watching this shit show unfold.

I mean he literally was called out by Alan to take better care of himself, to stop taking the easy way out, and that he’ll be the one to suffer in the end.

Not to mention bro was UNPHASED when Alan threw him against a wall. He was more thrilled to have gotten under his skin, if even for a moment.

Then there’s his opening line about getting revenge or whatever (I’m running on 4 hours of sleep so sorry if I misremembered it).

And then when you pick up Sho’s affinity lines about him, you sort of start to paint a picture of someone who’s reckless and does shit that gives him a thrill in the moment (ie. fights in the club and whatever the fuck he’s doing with fireworks that has Sho hard pass on it ever again).

I’m sure there’s other instances too.

But!

I come here to say this-

Whatever the fuck happened to this dude to make him this way- man.

Here are some of my predictions with no facts just feels

- Sho will eventually have enough of his shit and cut him out of his life if he doesn’t change (they’ll rekindle the friendship probably because Sho does care about him otherwise why put up with his bullshit? He’s just worried about his buddy who’s literally self-destructing)

- He’s going to lose his followers and the little bit of validation he gets

- He’s going to have Vice-Captain stripped from him

- He’s gonna get humbled

But- ALSO yeah I’m not done here

Here is a wild theory for you.

I think that because he was on a self-destructive path BEFORE Darkwick (aha fights in the club etc) he was def miserable af and

Someone ‘slipped’ to him about making demon pacts (that someone I have a feeling was Hyde).

He did it and survived his shit and tells Sho what Hyde told him (and drags Sho into it maybe?? Idk man I’m tired LMFAO)

And this is why Sho is icy af towards Hyde because he just made his friend exponentially WORSE

Anyways ANYWAYS

And- and listen-

Leo is such an interesting character who definitely has a lot of flaws. Idc if you don’t like him because he’s an ass and tried to have MC killed so did Taiga

I’m just excited to see how his character unfolds. Because so far, he’s presenting himself as a character who is very complex but on the surface level is a fucking ass.

He’s self-destructive and I really hope we can see that play out.

But hey- maybe I’ll eat my words in a year or so.

Guess it depends on how ever the game decides to take it which I’m cool with whatever route they go because I have 0 expectations anyways and that’s what RP and FanFics are for

[michelleleewise]

Frozen Hearts

Paring: Loki x reader

Warnings: mentions of past injuries, mentions of past trauma, mentions of infertility, self esteem issues, self deprecating thoughts, mild swearing, mentions of virginity.

Summary: you and Loki finally talk...

Part 12-

====================================

Loki's pov-

I sat at her bedside, waiting for her to wake. It amazed me how much this woman got stabbed. "Brother, how is she?" I heard Thor as he came in. "No change yet, but the doctors are hopeful." I said looking at her. I felt his hand on my shoulder "she will be fine Loki." He said. "This was all my fault Thor, if I hadn't..." I shook my head looking down. "Loki stop, you'll have a chance to talk when she wakes." He said sitting down. "Truly brother, why didn't you talk to her that night?" He asked leaning forward. "I have no excuse for my actions." I said looking down. "I was hurt, and I wanted to hurt her back." I sighed, clearing my throat.

"I must admit I am not as close to her as you are, but I have seen how she looks at you when you are unaware. I do truly believe she cares for you." I heard Thor say. "And I behaved like a fool, I ruined it Thor. I don't deserve her." I said. "Yes, you were a fool, but you went after her, you found her. You recognize your mistep and now you must fix it." He said standing up. "If you care for her as I believe you do, you will make this right, trust yourself Loki, believe in yourself as I believe in you." He said, patting my shoulder before leaving. He was right, I needed to make this right.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You slowly opened your eyes, the room too bright and overwhelming. You heard beeping next to you, tilting your head seeing the machines you were hooked up to. You rubbed your eyes, trying to sit up, remembering your wound as pain shot through you. "Why am I always getting stabbed?" You sighed to yourself laying back down. You turned your head to the other side, seeing Loki asleep in a chair by your bed. Tears formed in your eyes as you watched him, his head lulled to the side, his legs stretched out, one foot over the other.

You grabbed the controls for the bed and sat yourself up. If this was going to happen, you were going to sit up to do it. You saw Loki slowly open his eyes and look at you "Thank norns, your awake." He sighed sitting up. "How long was I alseep?" I asked. "About 3 days." He said fixing his clothes. "Well, I'm awake so you can go back to Candy." I said looking down. "She isn't here, she won't be here." He said clearing his throat. You looked at him confused. "I, as kindly as I could, told her I couldn't be with her." He said looking down. You nodded but didn't say anything.

The silence was deafening as you fidgeted with your fingers, not knowing what to say. "My brother." Loki started clearing his throat "told me what happened, with you and Matt." He said looking at you. "I had assumed since you had been with him previously, that he had won your heart back." He said looking down. "Loki, how could you think that? I literally caught him with another woman, why would I go back to him?" You said raising your voice a little. "Truly, I was hurt and not thinking. I only reacted. I have no excuse for what I did." He said. "You know what the stupid thing is Loki?" You said huffing a laugh. "I was actually going to ask you out." You said looking at him as you felt a tear fall.

"Y/n.." he whispered sitting next to you on the bed. "Loki don't. I don't need your pity or you feeling sorry for me. I know I'm not tall enough, or pretty enough, or..." you were stopped as his lips crashed onto yours. You closed your eyes as the shock wore off, you pressed your lips to his, tilting your head to deepen it, your hand going to his hair, pulling him closer. You broke for air as he rested his forehead against yours. "I'm sorry, i needed you to stop talking." He smiled. He leaned back, grabbing your hands in his "y/n, the only reason I brought those women around was because I didn't think I could have you." He said looking into your eyes. "I have wanted you for so long, but you were with that unless excuse of a man, and then my own stupidity bested me. I only hope you can forgive me." He said looking at you.

You cupped his cheek in your hand "Oh Loki, you don't want me." You sighed putting your hand down. "Why would you say that?" He asked furrowing his eyebrows "those women are nothing compared to you, you are amazing love." He said sternly. You sighed "Loki, I could never give you everything you want. I'm broken, damaged." You said wiping your tears. He looked at you like you had two heads "you are no more damaged then I, and that doesn't matter." He said looking at you. You shook your head, taking your hands from his, lifting up the bottom of your shirt, revealing your new injury and your scars. You cleared your throat "I'm sure you've seen them. Even though you were to kind to mention them." You sighed looking at him "Well, a few years ago, before I came to the tower, I was attacked, actually by the same people as this time." You laughed at the irony. "Umm, when I was stabbed, it caused alot of damage, inside." You sighed wiping your face. "Y/n." He breathed "I umm.....I can't have children Loki. They took that from me." You looked up at him, trying to read his reaction.

He looked at you abdomen, you felt his fingers lightly trace your scars "y/n, you are the strongest, bravest woman I have known. This does not define you." He said laying his hand on your scars "this does." He said pointing at your heart. "And I would be honored if you would allow me to court you." He said looking at you. You put your hand over his and looked up at him "I would like that very much Loki." You breathed. He smiled, leaning over kissing you "but, you need to talk to me if something is bothering you." You said pulling back "deal, you do too." He said. You nodded and grabbed his head attaching your lips to his.

You wrapped your other hand around his back pulling him towards you, opening your mouth massaging his tongue with yours. He pulled back panting "y/n, as much as I would love to ruin you, I think we should wait until your healed." He sighed rubbing your arms. "There's something else I need to tell you." You said looking down. "What is it?" He asked running his fingers through your hair. "I.......I've never actually been with anyone, not completely." You said looking at him. "I would be your first?" He asked cupping your cheek. You nodded "I couldn't ever get past." You waved your hand over your scars. "And I'm not sure I'm entirely ready just yet." You said. "Y/n love, I will never push you to do something you are not ready for. You have my word." He said kissing you. "I am yours y/n, and when you are ready, I will completely and entirely ruin you." He whispered against your lips, sending a shiver down your spine and your cheeks heat up.

"Will you lay with me, please?" You asked scooting over. He smiled as he laid down next to you, gently pulling you closer. Your fingers ran through his hair as you stared into his eyes. "Get some rest y/n. Im not going anywhere. I'll be here when you wake." He said kissing you. You folded your hands between you, holding into his shirt as you curled into him. "Oh and y/n, no more getting stabbed, only i am allowed to stab you." He said kissing your head. You huffed a laugh as you snuggled closer to him. "OK, I promise." You sighed as you felt yourself fall asleep......

💚💚💙💙💚💚💙💙💚💚💙💙💚💚💙💙💚💚💙

@vbecker10 @lokisprettygirl22 @sinsandguilt @usagishira @cabingrlandrandomcrap @daggers-and-mischief @stupidthoughtsinwriting @catalina712 @kat-nee @mcufan72 @lokiprompts @123forgottherest @asgardianprincess1050 @midnights-ramblings @el-zef @froggiecky @sweetberry47 @xorpsbane @huntress-artemiss @lovingchoices14 @camelblogwithoutcamels @lucylaufeyson3 @howdidurhammergrowchris @itsamedeemonee @lokixryss @lonadane @storybrook-beck @someonesleftshoe @buttercupbestie @elegantcheesecakecrown

[soleminisanction]

This post spun a little out of control, but it was inspired by @avaraydrake's tags on my previous Jordanna Spence essay. (Thank you for that, btw. Sincerely, they were great to read and clearly gave me a lot to think about.) Specifically, it started from their comments on this scene:

Which I read as Steph abandoning Jordanna while she's unconscious, while avaraydrake pointed out that this is standard first aid practice. Which is true. I personally expect a superhero to do more than just the standard practice, but it is true... in a vacuum.

The reason this moment stands out to me, the reason I tend to focus on it, has to do with a recurring problem throughout the series that isn't directly related to Jordanna. But to explain what that problem is, I'm going to have to jump ahead a few issues, to Issue 8 -- the Red Robin crossover.

See, all through the Batgirl side of the crossover -- in-between insulting Tim, stalking Tim, and also that weirdly sexist dress thing @mzminola pointed out -- Steph is constantly insisting to Tim that she's "different now." That he has to trust and like and respect her again because she's "changed" from the person who tried to chase him down for attention. Even though she spends the entire issue... chasing him down for attention.

Ultimately, the thread culminates in this page:

Which, if you've been paying attention to the series up to this point, rings completely hollow. Frankly, it feels like Steph is just bullshitting Tim because she wants to prove him wrong about her.

Because see, up to literally this very issue? Steph doesn't help, rescue, or assist a single Gotham citizen. She just fights people.

Her first scene certainly wasn't about helping anyone, given that she beat both the racers up and then got them arrested. The second time we see her suit up, she leaps in to save a cop... only because he is Detective Nicholas "St. Nick" Gage, who gets more page time than Barbara, flirts with Steph constantly, and is (very weirdly) basically the deurotagonist of the series.

And even then, Steph doesn't actually save him -- she swings in, punches one guy, and then while she's busy posing and thinking, "ooooh, the cop is pretty," Nick gets them both blown out of the window.

Continuing on to the party scene, even if you don't think Steph abandons Jordanna at that moment, she's not shown helping her either. No one is, really.

And then that, of course, leads into her big confrontation with Scarecrow which... also isn't about saving anyone. It's about how Steph is so strong and stubborn and full of hope (I think?) that she's able to overcome "her ''''worst''' self" (people telling her that she's a shitty superhero), and that's what makes her so inspiring and is why she deserves "a second chance."

That pattern continues for almost the entire first year. Steph doesn't save anyone until Issue 8, when she helps Tim protect Leslie Tompkins. The first time she so much as thinks about protecting "the people of Gotham" comes in Issue 9, and even when it does it's with this... really uncomfortable dynamic, which actually starts back in Issue 4.

See, in Issue 4, during Steph's first patrol in her shiny new ugly Batgirl costume, the first thing Steph does is knock a pair of robbers off a skyscraper, only thinking to ask how much weight a grapple line can hold after they're in free-fall. She winds up swinging them down into a tour bus. It's unclear if Steph is even aware the tourists are there, but to be fair she is trying not to die.

The tourists immediately swarm to start taking pictures (starting with her butt, of course), when Steph is suddenly approached by a certain doe-eyed little girl.

This girl is named Nell Little which, in addition to never being spoken in the text (we only know because of an interview Brian Q. Miller gave at some point), is suspiciously close to Little Nell, Charles Dickenson's archetypal too-good-for-this-sinful-earth angel-victim-child.

Nell Little is a semi-recurring character throughout the book, having 4 appearances over the course of the 2 years. Her personality is sweet and innocent; her likes are Stephanie, trying to be like Stephanie, and watching Stephanie beat up bad guys; and her role in the narrative is to admire Stephanie's every move, tell her what a good job she's doing, and occasionally be put in danger so that Stephanie can rescue her.

I find this recurring dynamic to be extremely off-putting. It doesn't help that this is neither the first nor the last time DC will give Stephanie a young black sycophant and... I dunno, it just hits a weird note.

That note is then amplified by the fact that Nell is present at Steph's first-ever civilian rescue in Issue 9, which ends like this:

...with a literal "and then everyone clapped" while the guy that Steph literally just finished beating up calls her "beautiful" and immediately develops a massive crush on. He's the one who winds up being the Gray Ghost, btw, and when he turns back up he starts addressing Steph exclusively as, "My Violet Avenger."

I'd forgotten that was a thing. Gross.

Also doesn't help that the only thoughts Steph has during the sequence (aside from mindless comedic set-up about her mundane evening checklist) come in this panel: 

Where she's literally preening and singing her own praises, with the people she saved boiled down to nothing but, "Zero collateral damage," which just as well might be referring to train.

Then the second rescue we see her do (Issue 10), ends like this:

While the third isn't actually a rescue, it's the big saving-the-world moment from the end of the first year's arc, which just happens to also involves Steph saving Barbara.

(This arc also ends with a still-shot of Steph while someone -- I think the Gray Ghost, but it's left deliberately vague in the panel -- declares, "She's amazing, isn't she?" Put a pin in both of these snapshots for later).

The fourth rescue is a team-up with Damian, which is also the third encounter with Nell Little in Issue 17. It's the closest thing Nell gets to character development, in that she ends the issue thinking that Robin is totally the coolest now, too, and also she's portrayed as sooooo pure that she can help Stephanie make Damian act more like A Real Boy.

Notably, she doesn't trip over herself to tell Damian what a great job he's doing. He just gets a goodbye.

And the last one -- if you stretch the definition of rescue -- comes in Issue 18, the Valentine's story where Steph helps return Teekl, and that instantly wins Klarion over as her best buddy. He ends off that story telling her how unique she is -- sincerely, while the context and the pause in her line makes it read as a backhanded compliment, like she was stopping herself from saying, "Weird."

And that's it for rescues, but Steph does have one more interaction with the public, in the very last issue. It's just.... ugh.

If you read a lot of superhero comics, I kind of hope you see the trend here that makes me so uncomfortable. This isn’t even including all the times she runs into Detective St. Nick, who ends every single one of their interactions (and half of his interactions with Barbara) singing Stephanie's praises, right up until he has to shade in his Tragic Backstory.

Or all the encounters with the aforementioned Gray Ghost, who cannot shut up about “My Violet Avenger” and how gorgeously wonderful she is.

Or how Barbara, Dick, and Wendy are all made, at varying times, to say something to the extent of: “Golly! Stephanie is so amazing!” while the closest Steph gets to returning the sentiment is the moment linked above when she calls Babs, “The only person who’s ever really given a crap about me.”

Rescuing people… it’s a standard trope. The exact frequency varies a lot depending on the era, but if you pick up a random issue of a superhero comic there’s a fairly decent chance that you’ll see your hero(es) dejour saving a random civilian, or even multiple if there’s a disaster situation. I’ve probably read thousands of rescues from hundreds of heroes over the years.

Yet, off the top of my head, I can’t remember a single other rescue that ends with the recuee(s) tripping over themselves to tell the hero how great they are. I’m sure they’re out there, I’m sure plenty of heroes get a big, triumphant, "You're our hero and we love you!" moment at some point in their career. But to make that the default, universal response every single time she saves someone, or even just speaks to the public, for an entire series? That’s weird, right? 

In other series, majority of the time the rescuee doesn’t do anything at all, they just get swooped off-panel. If the hero’s lucky they might get a thank-you and a chance to give a heroic one-liner. Because y’know, the act of rescuing is supposed to be enough to establish that our heroes are heroic. That they only sometimes get thanked—or heck, that people might even lash out or turn against them—helps to reinforce that the heroes aren’t just doing this for praise and affection, but because of some other, more powerful motivation. 

So for Steph to only be showered with adoration at every turn, while her internal monologue focuses exclusively on how good it all makes her feel? That only reinforces the opposite feeling, that Steph's primary motivation is her own reputation and feelings, not a drive to defend other people. That these rescues are far outnumbered by big, showy spectacles where Steph can fight something and look awesome while doing it really doesn't help matters.

This is all exacerbated by two other factors, which come together with everything mentioned above to make it impossible to take her singular, isolated claim of being a hero "for the city" seriously.

The first is the way Steph reacts on the very rare occasion she feels her hero efforts aren't being appreciated. We only see this twice, once in her original meeting with Detective Nick: 

(Remember that this is literally her second night out as Batgirl, and she's pissy that he didn't know her on sight.) The second incident is the protest Jordanna organizes in Issue 16, which is only done to make Jordanna look bad.

The other exacerbating circumstance is how the series ends.

Again, there's two factors here. The first is the Black Mercy illusion that Steph is put under, where again, a huge deal is made of how special Stephanie is for being able to break herself out of the illusion, before going into an 8 page montage of Steph getting to be the main character of the entire universe forever, and everyone's favorite superhero, while people sing her praises.

I don't have space for it here because this post is already too long but one of these days I'm going to break down what that whole sequence says about Steph's character when you analyze it in-universe. But more pressing to this post is the conversation surrounding that montage, the last scene in the entire series.

Just for comparison—Tim ends both Robin and Red Robin thinking about his responsibility to Gotham. Cass's Batgirl series ends with her unhappily killing her mother at Shiva's request and walking dramatically off into the night. The contemporary Nightwing series ends with Dick taking Babs tandem skydiving, asking her to “let him do the flying.” Impulse ends with Bart bonding with his new guardians, and Superboy with Kon moving to Kansas and talking about making Clark proud.

Batgirl (2009) ends with Stephanie talking about herself, how many wonderful adventures she's been on, and how this moment is hers and that makes it special and also did we mention she likes purple? Babs is also there to tell her how special and wonderful she is for always being a happy widdle Pollyanna.

And that's really the central problem here.

I am not inclined to give Steph's actions the benefit of the doubt throughout this series because the series is utterly Stephanie-obsessed. Steph only saves people so they can tell her how wonderful she is. All the supporting cast, all the people in the entire city, are only there to stroke Stephanie's ego and tell her she's so amazing.

That line, waaaaaay back up there in the Red Robin crossover? Is the only time Stephanie ever spares so much as a second thought for the people of Gotham. And like I said, that comes across more as her trying to show Tim up, because she spends the entire issue trying desperately to convince him that she is "different now."

If Steph really was supposed to be "doing it for all of them," if her motivation was supposed to be for the sake of others, the writer utterly failed to communicate that because he was way too interested in sucking her dick.

So yeah. Long post but, again, thank you @avaraydrake, because I've been trying to put this sentiment into words for a couple of years now and for some reason your tags gave me the perfect starting point.

[violettelueur]

ITADORI YUJI + FUSHIGURO MEGUMI + GOJO SATORU || TOUCH-STARVED

| featuring : itadori yuji + fushiguro megumi + gojo satoru from jujutsu kaisen

| warnings : grammar errors but other than that n/a

| form : headcanons

| published : 15 december

| request : can i have a black coffee; yuuji, megumi, and satoru with a fem so thats touch starved and practically bottles her emotions up and always not feeling theyre worth anyone's time due to the household that she grew up in? its perfectly fine to decline this as you please!

| barista’s notes : hi hi guys! barista violettelueur is back after disappearing for some good few hours ʕ*ﾉᴥﾉʔ please forgive me, but i fell asleep the minute i got back from school and woke up at 9pm ʕ ㅇ ᴥ ㅇʔ meaning i slept for a good 5 hours...hahaha oops. BUT i hope whoever requested this enjoys their cup of classic black coffee (jujutsu kaisen request!) and please come again soon when the cafe opens back up!

ITADORI YUJI:

Being the type not to be physically affectionate towards someone, you were used to bottling up your emotions and were pretty good at hiding them as well.

Itadori knew this but didn’t know the reason - but let it off - and allowed you to take some control of the pace of the relationship. But if needed he would instigate

 the first move and hug and kiss you first - which does leave a warm fuzzy feeling in your stomach that you never really experience due to how you are raised in your family.

However, there will be times where you would feel extremely touch-starved to the point where even if you have to force yourself to hold his pinky finger, that would be enough for you - probably not, don’t lie.

There would be times where you would mentally beg Itadori to make the first move since you knew what he is like - but there are days where his mind chooses to be dense and here you are suffering.

So when the both of you are alone, you would just violently grab the back of his jacket before pulling him towards you to press your face upon his back.

You can’t lie, his scent was really calming you down and slowly the feeling of being touch-starved was wearing off slightly.

Itadori will be extremely surprised by what you have done but would allow himself to stay still since he wanted to relish this feeling of you making the first move for once.

Once he knows you feel comfortable, he would turn around much to your dismay and wrap his arms around you while one hand is used to press your face into his chest - because knowing you, you are probably blushing really bad right now.

However, Itadori is really happy that you are coming out of your shell and allowed yourself to express your love for him in a different way - he probably will have to wait a little longer, but this will do for now

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI:

Now this one is a little more complicated because Fushiguro probably knows about how your household treats you since you and him really confide in each other.

You both really didn’t have the best situations when you came to the topic of families so the fact that you two could somehow relate to it helped you two to trust each other.

Now the other issue - well not an issue - is that both of you weren’t really the type to be affectionate with each other. 

You both knew you loved each other, it’s just physical touch wasn’t your love language - more of quality time and maybe some act of service.

However, Fushguro will try his best and will probably pat your head here and there as well pull your cheek to help your snap out of your thoughts or when you say something really stupid.

You would always try to do something physically affectionate but you always back down since you just don’t know what to do.

BUT that all changed once you one day were feeling really touch starved.

You don’t know why this happened, but you just did...like out of nowhere.

So once you and Fushiguro were both alone - probably in his dorm room or yours - you would randomly bury your face into his chest before shakily wrap your arms around his waist - surprising him completely at your sudden display of affection but he would stay still.

He will probably know that you are blushing and feeling really shy, so he will also envelop you in his arms to tell you that it was okay for him as well.

Since you have literally squished your face into his chest, you wouldn’t see the small smile that he has on his face when he looks down on you.

Man is in love~

GOJO SATORU:

No matter what, this man has no idea what the definition of ‘personal space’ is.

“Personal space? What’s that?”

So whenever and wherever you both, this man will have his hands somewhere on you no matter what - there is literally no escape from it.

It could either be him holding your hand randomly, him placing his head on top of yours (if you are shorter than him), him hugging you in front of his students or him bombarding you with kisses - there was no limit to how much affection he would get you.

And to be honest, it really did help with the physical affection aspect of your relationship since you didn’t really involve yourself in that part.

However, Gojo knew why you were somewhat shy or afraid to be physically affectionate, so he didn’t force you to act affectionate but rather encouraged you and let you go at your own pace.

Sometimes he would open his arms wide and just wait for you to just fall into his embrace allowing him to swing you back and forward.

Although you wouldn’t tell him this, when he does go on missions that makes him leave for days or maybe weeks on end, you really crave his physical attention and become extremely badly touch-starved since you were so used to his affection on a daily basis.

So much to his surprise, when you would run up to him and hug him really tight to the point where he can’t even pry your arms away if he wanted to.

You had basically trapped him as well as stuck yourself on him like glue - but does Gojo care? No~ 

He really is relishing this little physical affection of yours and just stands there savouring the homely warmth that you are giving him.

He is really enjoying this and will probably tease you later~

[headstrongblake]

@thewholecrew: kassy & nick || all american universe

a grumble sounded in the back of his throat as kassy playfully poked about their on a trial bases newbie that everyone else seemed so fucking fond of. he rolled his eyes nearly instantly, pulling kassy just the slightest bit closer with his arm, "don't even think 'bout it trouble, 'sides, you all want him to be accepted, right?" slow acquaintances fine. but until nick's trust in the kid was fully satisfied, he had no issue being a barrier between nate and his people. especially kass. "s'not got anythin' to do with liking the guy, he's...fine," nick admitted, "just don't have any reason to trust him." especially now that he's out of commission and spending all his bloody time at home, completely out of the loop with all his control relinquished. christ, it's bad enough they had that guy behind his bar. at his fucking club. as his untethered annoyance about nate began to trickle in his gaze, he blinked it away as kassy met his eyes, offering him that beautiful smirk.

nick took in a breath, feeling that stabbing pit of guilt twist in his stomach once more. "yeah, i know," he agreed in a resigned tone, eyes casting out the glass wall as he stared off into his backyard. with kassy, it almost comes naturally how she takes care of him. ever since that one time he'd misdirected his anger toward her, it's felt damn right natural to allow her to care for him and him her. but the kind of torture he'd endured...garrett far exceeded jacob in every way except in his mind. in there, they meld together. sometimes, it's too difficult to distinguish whether the pain comes from his healing burn wounds or the raised scars on his chest. but the pain remains the same from all those years ago. the anger, bitterness, and all that resentment nicklas bottled over time has come back in crashing waves, leaving an unstable boy who knew better than to accept help in his times of need. "sorry kass, truth is...i'm havin' a hard time with it all y'know, don't usually have a whole nurse at my side during recovery," he added a little more lightheartedly.

as kassy's head rolled along his arm, he couldn't help but bring his gaze back to her, a softness overtaking his features as he did so. a smirk tugged at his mouth, head shaking as she lifted her fingers, listing off the items she always had to have. "naturally," he concluded when she started with her phone, then moved on to her snacks because of course kassy did. a light chuckle rumbled in his chest. god, he'd never met a woman who liked to snack as much as she did, and he found it downright adorable about her. sometimes, she was an easy girl to please. "oh yeah, i find it hard to believe you've ever gone anywhere without that gloss, pretty sure it's always on your person for a few other reasons too," nick added, slying, a brow lifting along with his smirk. how many times had he watched her carefully apply another layer of lip gloss after she'd decided to practically attack his neck. he was purely an innocent bystander.

with their casual conversation and kassy tucked against him, for a moment, it was easy to forget why he'd been frustrated to begin with. if he stayed like this, unmoving and comfortable with her, he could almost pretend like the past week was all just a screwed-up nightmare. a never-ending one at that. but it never lasts because even a moment as nice and normal as this is always interrupted by the fact that he cannot do whatever the hell he wants for himself anymore. "will it make ya feel better if i let you take care of me a lil bit more after our smoke?" he asked, hating that he was. but the itch across his chest from his burns was becoming nearly uncomfortable, needing the moisture from the special creams kassy applied once hunter said it was safe to do so. "could use some of those creams of yours for my chest in a while."

@headstrongblake: kassy & nick. / verse: all american.

though it was a far cry from the bright and genuine smile she'd seen on him before, anything was better than the near permanent scowl nick had been wearing since they brought him home. the last time she'd seen him smile so weightlessly was when he'd been deep under the influence of the morphine at the hospital. god, she'd been so fucking scared for him, and then for him to start squirming and trying to get up all while wearing that goofy grin that made her heart squeeze painfully in her chest. it had been such a stark contrast to the desperation in their kiss. we're okay, he told her and god she'd clung to that ever since. kassy shook her head at the memory as her hand rested on his thigh a moment, shifting closer to him as he tucked his arm around her. it was hard to think back and not feel the desperate, anxious need to be near him; whether at times he was insufferable or not.

a soft scoff of her own escaped before she tapped her chin with her nail in thought, lips quirking into a small smirk, "well he hasn't been but now that's a good idea, might have to ask him," she teased back, giving him a light nudge against his side with her shoulder. nick was still clearly not as warmed up to nate as the rest of the group was slowly becoming -- well, nick and rev; the two most protective grumps which kassy could understand. "not sure he'd help though since it'd give you another reason to dislike him," she couldn't help but also tease in a light quip. she knew nick was also not enjoying the fact that nate was working as his bar while he was here stuck at home, so she would tread lightly and she was sure nate knew to too -- if he knew what was good for him.

she shrugged at his playful agreement, glancing up at him with a small smirk, "well, you usually make it easy," she said just as playful back and it was true. this was the first time they truly were to butt heads because of how frightened she had been for his life. how much healing was involved, how much pain she had heard over the phone and every so often when she'd see his injuries. she just wanted to protect him, for him to be safe and to heal and for her to be there for him during that time. because it wasn't just all that, it was also the painful loss both he and octavia were suffering from losing grant yet again. and so she wasn't sure she could be as lenient on him as she had before and it also frightened her a bit because she knew he was his own person and if he truly wanted to do something he was stubborn enough to do so.

but just as he had stayed by her side while she refused his help and company, she would do the same. she watched as he took a long drag from the joint, only lowering it when he leaned his head back so she could take another drag of her own. a brow rose, small smirk curling around the joint before she exhaled the smoke slowly between her lips. she too was growing relaxed as she cuddled a little closer to him, rolling her head back along his arm to look up at him. raising her hand as she counted the three on her fingers, "one; my phone, duh, two; snacks because you can't smoke one of these without needing a little something to munch on, aaaaand three," she began, hand going into her oversized sweater pocket to pull out; "lip gloss," she told him with a rueful smirk before smacking her lips together playfully and shrugging. "to of course reapply after said joint and snacks."

[matan4il]

If the final season episode is titled "Starting Over," or something similar because I forget, and it's making me worried.

1. What if it's Buck asking Taylor to "start over?" Everyone is back together and he's in a better frame of mind than he was when they first got together. Which... still makes me mad on how they did it. Dr. Wells anyone, or is it just me? However, I think this relationship is dead in the water after the whole Don*to wtf cheating kiss.

I hate repetitive storylines. Who's next? Athena cheating on Bobby with Detective Ransone?

2. Madney "starting over" because she was finally told by someone about him punching Buck? She visits dispatch and Eddie lets it slip? Hopefully it would ring alarm bells for Maddie because of Doug. They really need to bring up that punch to clear the air, but it looks like nope. That happens off screen.

3. What if it's Eddie approaching Ana and asking to "start over" because he's in a much better place now after "starting over" at the 118 and from therapy. He was attracted to her in the beginning. I don't see him coming back until that final episode of the season because of that title, but I could be wrong.

I can see them doing one or three to slam the lid closed on Buddie... for now or for forever? Especially since She-who-shall-not-be-named and Mr.-write-fanfiction are in control.

Hi Nonnie, you’re right about the ep title, it is ‘Starting Over’. OK, let’s tackle these one at a time!

1. Do I think it will be Buck asking Taylor to start over again? I might be wrong, but I think not. Every step of the way, 911 has shown that these two do NOT work as a couple, even before the cheating. Yes, Buck could ask Taylor that, but in order for US, the audience, to root for that, there has to be some foundation there that can work. I’m thinking of my personal fave use of this trope, in a gay themed movie called Heights (another one I watched in my endless quest to watch every gay media ever created), and the reason why it works is because when Jonathan asks Alec to start over, you know that this is the first time he’s being honest about who he is, about being attracted to and wanting a r/s with a man. That’s why you root for them despite the stuff that came before. But what indication do we have that Buck and Taylor would work even if they started over? Their issue isn’t the kiss, their issue is in all of the moments where as a couple, they don’t communicate, don’t know each other, don’t trust each other, don’t get each other and seem to only choose at this point to be together because the alternative seems worse to them. And that’s not about to magically change in the finale. So I’m not worried, I don’t think he’ll ask her for that. Again, I might be wrong, but I just don’t see how B/T can suddenly work when so far we’ve been repeatedly shown that fundamentally, not due to circumstances or outside pressure, they simply don’t.

2. I do assume Madney will be among those starting over in the finale, along with the team as a whole, finally being all back together. I agree, I wish we had Chim’s apology for the punch on screen, but for a moment there, I was concerned they wouldn’t have him apologize at all. As I said in other posts, I think the punch was Chim at his breaking point, not something characteristic of him in any way, and I was apprehensive that because of that, they might let it go. So I’m glad they made it clear the punch was something that he needed to apologize for, and that he did do this.

3. I have thought of the possibility of Eddie going to Ana to start over after he’s better, but... I frankly don’t see it either. Again, much like B/T, Eddie broke up with her because they were fundamentally not working. Did he think she’s pretty? Yes. And perfect on paper. Yet he wasn’t happy with her, to the degree that simply thoughts of commitment made him have panic attacks. How do you come back from that? I don’t think any couple can. He could have broken up with her for fear he’s so messed up that he wanted to protect her from it, or that he expected she would break up with him and he couldn’t stand the thought so he did it first, but nope. They made it clear that thinking of being with her long term stressed him out. By no means can they use therapy to just erase that.

I hope this eases your mind, Nonnie! IDK if Buddie will go canon, but I am pretty sure none of the above will be the nail in the coffin of that option! xoxox

(I got an influx of asks, I WILL answer all of them, but it might take a sec. If anyone wants to check whether I've already answered theirs or to read my replies, here's my ask tag. Thank you! xoxox)

[roxtron]

okay, I wanna try to get my points across as well as I can, but ultimately this is just gonna be a ramble directly from my thoughts so don't expect it to be super formatted/structured I guess. cut in case people don't want to read a paragraph of text because this will inevitably get pretty long lol

Okay, so, I don't really know how to go about this, but as a tldr here, I don't think there's a way for the ending of this series to truly be a satisfying ending if it ends up being this short. I think even if the finale is good, the series spent so much time building up these plot points that I ultimately don't believe could be tied up in a satisfying way during one single episode. Like, okay. I can't speak for other people, I can only speak for my own experience and one other person I rambled with about this, but I feel like all the episodes we have up until this point feel like they were building up to the beginning of a great show, not building up to the end of it. Everything we have so far has (mostly) been plot episode after plot episode leading us directly to this finale, that it honestly feels like we got the build up to a season finale, not a series finale.

Regardless of the writers intentions, in my own experience I feel like a lot of the writing indicated the beginning of something. A lot of character arcs and development were either happening over one conversation in one episode, or as one-liner throwaway jokes.. (Honestly, think about it off the top of your head here, a lot of N's issues, especially with self-confidence and the way other people feel about and treat him- Was that really conveyed to us in a serious way at any point leading up to this? Because from my memory it was mostly one-liner throwaway jokes, mostly only from episode one too! It felt like his development was getting sort of sidelined to give more spotlight to Uzi, which I was initially fine with, because I assumed we'd have time to develop him during later episodes! And now we only have one episode left and I feel like he's really just.. had a few moments here and there.) Okay, distracted ramble aside, my point is there's a lot of loose ends I feel like won't have enough time to be tied up in a satisfying way. Did V survive? And if not then, honestly why? If J can be rebuilt after having her body destroyed, I don't see why V couldn't, especially when the only people that were capturing their cores are now dead, and they were worker drones, so it doesn't seem like they'll be coming back anytime soon. Even then her transition felt very abrupt as well.. like, she kind of hated Uzi for the majority of the series, and her switch to trusting her in that episode felt very sudden, it didn't feel very built up at all considering she's spent pretty much every episode up until now being afraid of her and thinking she needs to be destroyed, and now she just.. trusts the person she thinks (and ended up being right to predict) Cyn has control over. I assumed if V came back they'd at least get to discuss it in future episodes or something but, ah, nope, one episode left to resolve that plot point, if they even decide to bring it up at all. I was intending to have that paragraph go over more loose ends they'd need to tie up but apparently I had a lot to say about V. Anyways.. There's definitely a lot of plot points to be wrapped up, mainly in the cliffhanger with J and the other worker drones, for SO many reasons. Agh. The worker drones haven't had that much screentime to develop them, and again, I thought it'd be cool to see these background characters get their time to shine and expand the cast now that the story is expanding to such high stakes! but ah, no, only one episode to do that, so they'll ultimately probably get, what, a couple minutes of screentime? 5-10 tops? It's gonna be very hard for them to break out of their stereotypical molds and feel like actual fleshed out characters when there's so little time left, and it's unlikely much of it will even be spent on them. And fucking Khan.

We can all objectively agree he's a pretty bad neglectful father right? Personally I don't care if "he's trying," he seems to completely ignore Uzi's emotional state until it becomes a problem, and again, let's not forget the pilot where he LEFT HER TO DIE. I feel like you can't even take the route of "oh he was worried about his safety" because like.. yeah. he was worried about himself, and didn't care what happened to her. All he had to do was listen to her and take the gun, but he didn't even want to try. For all Uzi's on-the-nose rambling about it, she's right. I don't know why the show is acting like he's just a funny side character now. And again, now that we only have ONE EPISODE LEFT I don't believe any finale, no matter how well written, is really going to be able to successfully redeem him, possibly through him risking his life with one action in the finale, completely ignoring Uzi's entire childhood, as if him doing one good thing now would make up for what he's done in the past. Personally it feels almost inevitable that an ending like that would come across as a last-minute redemption. It needs buildup, and we didn't get much of that. Especially considering the only other time he tried to help her back in the prom episode- literally could've led to her death. He hasn't really contributed to the plot or characters in a positive way at all.. Maybe I'm more specifically sensitive to this issue than other people would be, but personally I find last-minute redemptions (not even arcs, just, redemptions.) for shitty parent characters to be really annoying. As if one moment could make up for all the years worth of harm they've done leading up to this.

Anyway. it's not just that. those are the biggest issues that come to mind, but honestly? I think the whole N x Uzi ship is made a lot worse by this being the finale? I never liked it to begin with, I'm not going to say it was objectively bad or anything, but personally I thought their dynamic as friends was far more interesting, and shipping them just felt like a 'boy protagonist and girl protagonist need to get together' thing.. heteronormativity, woo... I feel like it's made their characters less developed in the long run, but I can acknowledge that's mostly my own personal opinion and potential bias showing. But ultimately, if they go through with it and 'confirm' it in the finale (as if they haven't been shoving it in the audience's faces the whole time with all the random blushing scenes and whatnot) I honestly think that's gonna make it look a lot worse, since, considering how fast-paced each episode moves from plot point to plot point.. it's gonna feel like they barely had any time to know each other before being officially 'in love.' Like, correct me if it's ever stated anywhere, but with how quickly episodes move from one point to the next, it feels like the plot only takes place over the course of, maybe a few weeks? So for them to already be 'in love' by that point feels like. you barely knew each other. what. I think this being the buildup into something they could explore further next season (assuming both of them can even make it out alive, but hell if one of them does they could always reflect in retrospect) kept it from being too annoying for me, since it felt like this was, again, the beginning of something, the teasing of it leading up to something that would be explored later. I still didn't like it, but I felt like at least the longer it sits eventually it'll go somewhere that actually adds depth to the plot, right..? But eh.. I don't think it does? It just kinda makes it feel like Uzi ends up crushing on any guy in front of her tbh, considering her other implied crush is Thad, I think. Her instantly getting a crush on N after they just met (especially considering their circumstances really should be making her hesitant to grow to trust him, not just.. instantly falling for him for no reason when they barely know each other..) just makes everything feel weaker in my opinion. Unless they wanna pull some 'power of love' thing at the end (which is also gonna feel. weird.) I personally feel like their connection would've been more meaningful if it were kept platonic. Having them be romantically interested in each other feels more like a simplification of their dynamic than giving it any additional depth. It just feels like it takes away depth in favor of shipping. But hey, that's mostly opinion based, at least more so than everything else I've said.

But overall I just think.. so much of the plot felt interesting because I thought we'd have time to develop it more, to develop the characters more, but we don't. We have one episode left and I feel like a lot of the characters have mostly been developed through a few conversations here and there and throwaway jokes. It feels like the show so rarely takes its characters seriously to the point that it feels like they've barely gotten any moments of real development because half their dialogue is just trying to be funny. That's where I get to talking about filler. In most shows, filler would be considered a bad thing, people don't generally like it, or at least criticize it more openly, take Steven Universe for example. If you've seen anything of that fandom's critique, you'll get what I mean. But the problem people had with shows like that is that they spent too much time on filler and barely developed its plot.

As weird as this may sound, I feel like Murder Drones has the opposite problem. It feels like they took most fandom's critiques of "this show went on for too long, therefore if it was shorter, it would be good." and just ran with it without stopping to think about why that critique applied to that specific show. I honestly think the show being so short makes it far less enjoyable in retrospect, because it feels like if this was the plan from the beginning, if the show was really going to end here.. it needed more time to properly develop it as a finale. It needed more time to feel like everything up until this point actually mattered and felt complete. As it stands now, I don't think that's going to be the case..

I think the problem is, ironically, they spent so much time on plot during most of their episodes, it feels like they were so focused on establishing the setting/worldbuilding and leaving character interactions to just be comedic relief, that the characters feel underdeveloped compared to everything else. (That, and it really doesn't help that this story isn't easy to follow on a first watch at all. A lot of plot points are explained through blink-and-you'll-miss-it moments to the point that I feel like you usually need to rewatch episodes or watch people talk about those freeze-frames in order to understand the more intricate details of what's going on/what's happened. But that's a side tangent.. I think this would've worked fine if it had been buildup, something that would continue to be explained/expanded on in-show later, but to expect your audience to pay attention to those freeze-frames and blink-and-you'll-miss-it moments is kind of alienating a casual audience that wants to be able to understand the plot without pausing the show every couple seconds for certain episodes. Anyway..) I feel like the characters development has been so surface-level up until this point I assumed it wasn't over, I assumed it would be expanded on, or at the very least N's treatment by V and J would be brought up again! They clearly damaged his self-confidence a lot, it feels very odd to brush that off as a "funny haha" thing when we're talking about a character's self confidence and identity. There's so many little things like that that I thought would be expanded on, and ultimately it seems like they may never be.

Personally? I think the show could've used more filler episodes to develop the characters more. Episodes that may not advance the plot but advance the characters dynamics and development. Instead it feels like those elements have been pushed aside, deemed secondary to explaining Cyn's lore and whatnot. I think the reason why shorter shows like this can work is ultimately because of how little they have going on to begin with. the best example I can think at the moment is Over the Garden wall, which amounted to I think also around 9 episodes? with most being around 10 minutes or so if I remember correctly. The reason that show worked so well is because the premise was so simple and character-driven. The moments that felt like they barely served the plot felt like they still had purpose because they served the characters, and at worst were a small bit of worldbuilding that helps add to the setting. The few episodes that were entirely plot-focused with no filler whatsoever were used more sparingly, and that's part of why they worked. It's like the whole thing with having a dark story with no lighthearted moments to balance it out, if you never see the characters happy, then seeing them continue to be upset doesn't have as much meaning, does it? I feel like it's the same kind of idea here. Our characters are so underdeveloped because the episodes have been so plot-focused I feel like we barely know anything about them and what they're thinking throughout all of this. We get some moments here and there but it's all so.. background in my opinion, and that's really sad to me. Especially because I think the Prom episode sort of shows that they're willing to do filler episodes like that. It's so odd in retrospect because that felt like the most blatant filler episode possible, they go to prom, doll tries to kill people- well, V was already gonna do that, so what else is new! It feels like there were ultimately only a couple minutes worth of screentime that contributed to the plot/characters, and the rest felt kinda skippable by comparison. Worse yet I feel like the prom setting made it feel like blatant shipping bait which.. I think I've already shown how I feel about that so I'll just ignore it for now. I'm not saying the prom episode shouldn't exist or that it should be skipped. My point is that it's a good example that they can create episodes that barely affect the larger plot but do spend at least some of that time building the characters, although not too much, i'll take something over nothing. My point is that I think they should've had more of this. (In concept, please, no more ship-bait prom episodes. can we let that trope go please?) If we had spent more time with episodes like this that build the characters a bit while only contributing to the main plot slightly, I say that's good! the show feels like it's trying so hard to cram all of its lore into the timeslot of the episode that having an episode where they don't do that means we have more time to focus on the characters and just breathe from the loredumping. I dunno. I'm tired, I've been rambling a while, but my point is with the way the show is in its current state, I honestly have severe doubts the finale is going to deliver on all the hype its built for itself. I think the show should've gone on longer, either pacing out the plot we already have across a wider range of episodes, allowing for the same finale but with a lot more buildup to justify it being a finale.. or something as simple as a season two.

I absolutely have to clarify I don't say this as a hater or whatever or someone who's watched this show only seeing the negatives in it, because I didn't! I was a bit critical/skeptical of the first few episodes but ultimately leading up to this I was hyped for it! I thought we'd get time to expand on these interesting ideas, and I was excited to see where things would go, but knowing this is the end.. I'm back to being skeptical. I don't think the finale is going to automatically be terrible or anything like that. I'll still watch it hoping it turns out the best it can be- But ultimately, I think by the simple nature of this being a finale, no matter how well they pull it off, I don't think it's ultimately going to justify all the development and loose ends that are going to feel very left behind. I think even if the finale is amazing, simply the fact that this is all the time we were given with so many different ideas fighting for screentime- it's going to make the series harder to enjoy in retrospect, at least for me. I have hope for it, I do hope it's a good finale, but ultimately, I have my doubts that it'll be a satisfying one. I can only hope I'm proven wrong, but hey, I figure it's worth rambling on about, why not?

would you guys tolerate me if I rambled about how I feel like murder drones is too short to have a satisfying ending if this truly is the finale to the entire series. or would that be annoying. because I have so many thoughts about it and I'm gonna be honest I'm going into this finale way more cautious and critical than before

[echos-newlegs]

Hi!! I would love to request number 13 with Tech! I feel like he would definingly ask you to hold hands for ""Science"" (and no other reason why do you ask) Readers pronouns are she/her, and pg or smut whichever is fine :) Thank you so much!

For Science

hhh this would be so cute and we stan him asking in the name of science. Because honestly same,

Tech x Reader: “I just wanted an excuse to hold your hand..”

Warnings: semi smut. I mean it leads up to it, but the moment gets ruined so it’s mainly just kissing, lmao. 😎 I was too tired to actually write smut.

Tech wasn’t really even sure when he started liking you. Of course he always liked you. Who couldn’t? You were amazing, beautiful, strong, courageous, smart.. Plus you not only listened to him, but you rambled with him. But that was besides the point. He was catching feelings for you. The new gunman and technician that clone force 99 was assigned. And he wanted to act upon those feelings more than anything.

He started small. Bringing you caf everyday. Just the way you liked it. It made his day just seeing the smile that came across your face when he would enter the room with a steaming cup for you. Catching you in a small conversation if you weren’t too entirely busy.

Then he started with small touches. Nudging you more, or tapping your arm to gain your attention. Or squeezing your shoulder or patting your back when you accomplished something and he was congratulating you.

You never really took too much time to think about it. You thought he was just being nice, and honestly? You loved it. You were just as touch starved as they were, and the contact made you feel something. Made you feel warm and appreciated.

After a few weeks of this. Nearly a month, actually. He got a new idea.

You were sitting in the copilot seat, waiting for him to make his entry. You had nothing better to do, all your tasks finished. So what better thing to do than sit with your favorite Batcher? Talk with him while he flew you and the gang to the planet that was actually pretty far away. You honestly weren’t too thrilled about the trip at all. Long flights always bored you.

Tech made it into the cockpit. Turning your head as you were slid down in your seat. Hands on your stomach. Eyes watching as he walked over to the pilot seat and began checking over things. “Ready for the trip?” You asked, and caught a glimpse of his smile. “I guess,” he spoke. “Not really much to be ready for.” He flipped a few switches and checked over the gauges as he readied the engines.

“What do you mean? Aren’t you excited about doing the same thing we’ve done a million times, then heading back to 79’s and getting hit on by random strangers?” You were being sarcastic, and it made him snort. Smile spreading across both of your faces. You just loved it when you could make him smile like this.

He sighed when he finally got the ship out of the atmosphere and into light speed. You both relaxing a bit. Though he relaxed more than you, since you were practically already relaxed. Just hitting a few switches here and there for him since he normally always had piloting under control. Which you admired him for.

He reached over and tapped your shoulder. Catching your attention as always. "Hm?" You hummed, watching as he shoved up his glasses using his index finger. "Can I hold your hand?" He asked. His question baffled you. Blinking a couple times, but you only shrugged. Not thinking twice of it. “Uh, sure, you good, goggles?” You teased as you held your hand out. Tech gently taking it in his own. Gloved thumb running over the back of your bare hand.

You noticed his gaze was elsewhere. Not on you anymore. His face even looked pink. “Uh yeah,” he stammered. Mentally cursing himself. Clearing his throat. He honestly thought this out before doing anything. “It’s a test.” “What sort of test?” He should have known you would ask that.

He thought, darting his tongue out to wet his lips. Lifting his head once more so his eyes would meet yours. “I wanted to test out a theory I had.” He spoke, shifting a bit in his seat. His hands now playing with your fingers. You wanted to squeal, it was so cute.

“Have you ever watched an infant grab someone’s finger when a parent, or even someone at random places their own finger in the palm of their hand?” You nodded. “Yeah. On the holo, why?” You were growing intrigued. You always found his spews so interesting. Especially this one.

“That’s known as the grab affect. Infants, especially of the human species, crave touch. Well, really any age of person does. The signs just show as early as infants even up to four weeks before they are born. Sucking thumbs, grabbing their umbilical cord. Or twins will even hold each other’s hands in the womb. It shows in other species of Aliens as well.” He told you, you nodding along with him. “Like when some babies cling to their mothers, like apes for example. It’s a common craving and it all comes down to how our brains are programmed.” He added, bringing a hand up to tap the side of his head with a soft smile. Hand dropping back to his lap.

“I find it quite interesting, really. They are saying, and have even in some ways proven that skin on skin contact. Like for instance, holding hands.” He gave your hand a light squeeze,” let’s off a chemical in our brain called ‘Oxytocin.’ It’s a neurotransmitter that helps our brains release feelings of trust, generosity, and compassion.” Tech told you.

You took in this information like it was gold. Watching the words fall from his mouth with an intent look. “They have proven that a lack of touch, which is often known as touch hungry, or touch starved. With children can lead to physical disabilities, such as a stunt in growth. Plus mental ones. It’s most common in adults, the mental issues are. Adults can get severe depression or even anxiety from the lack of being touched, you know?” He informed you, and you shot him a lopsided smile. “You feeling depressed or anxious, Techy?” You asked, and he smiled at that. “Not when I’m around you.”

You felt the blush creeping up the back of your neck. Kriff this was adorable. He is adorable. “They also have found that when fingers are interlaced, like this.” He interlaced your fingers with both hands. Eyes watching what he was doing, carefully. “Heart rate goes down, blood pressure goes down, and it puts your body in a relaxed state. All because of the pressure receptors that are triggered just from holding hands, though interlaced fingers triggers more of those receptors. Which are called the vagal activity,” you hummed and nodded. Watching as he looked up to meet your eyes.

“So..” he trailed off, his voice lowering, and you waited for the question that would soon follow after. “Do you feel more relaxed, mesh’la?” Your lips pressed into a small smile at that question, and you nodded. “Yeah.. I actually do, that was really interesting, Tech.” You told him, and nearly exploded at the wide grin he shot back at you. “Really?” He asked, he always seemed so shocked when you enjoyed his lectures.

“Yeah, I did,” you assured him. Watching as he stood from the seat. Using his hands still interlaced with yours to pull you up from your seat. A sudden burst of confidence flowed through him, like a rush of adrenaline did after nearly being shot on field. Hands squeezing yours as he brought you closer. You nearly stumbling into his chest. Looking up at him with furrowed brows. “Because, I just wanted an excuse to hold your hand.” He nearly whispered. Voice lowered and, well.. Deeper. Your lips inches apart, and you could nearly feel his breath on your lips. Sending a shudder down your spine.

“But with that being said, I do want to test a theory.” You blinked a couple times, then licked your lips. “And what’s that?” He leaned in a bit closer, your noses brushing now. “How much more oxytocin a kiss from you would release, than just holding your hand.” He added, and your smirked a bit. “Then what are you waiting for?”

He leaned in, finally closing the gap between the two of you and it felt so.. Euphoric. Your hands released one another’s to roam each other’s bodies. One of his hands moving to run through your hair, the other resting on the small of your back. Pushing you against him. You had one hand in his hair as well. Your other hand resting on his chest.

The two of you parted. Eyes fluttering open. Looking to one another with small huffs and pants. “So,” you started, and Tech still looked like he was trying to catch his breath. “Amazing,” he cooed. The hand in your hair moving to cup the side of your face. “So fucking amazing,” he murmured, and you couldn’t help but giggle. “How about another, then?”

It didn’t take asking him twice for another kiss. He was pulling your lips back to his in and instant. This kiss was a bit more desperate. Deeper, yet still soft. He wasn’t too rough and it drove you crazy.

Your lips parted in a gasp when he guided his thigh between your legs. The friction making you cling to him like a child. His tongue slipping into your mouth. Exploring and studying every inch of it like it was his job.

You pushed him a bit, and he backed up. Backs of his knees hitting the copilot seat and he sat down. Guiding you into his lap. Never breaking the kiss. Your legs now resting on either side of him.

He pulled from the kiss to spread kisses down your jaw. Lips leaving light and feathery trails down to your neck. Mouthing over the skin. Nipping the areas that had you gasping and nearly moaning. Your hands running under his blacks. Fanning over his stomach, then moving up to his chest. Rubbing at his tanned skin, and he groaned.

You both jumped when you heard the door to the cockpit swish open. Still sitting on his lap since his hands were still placed firmly around you. Your own hands moving to yourself. Techs shirt still hiked up right below his chest. You were both disheveled and practically holding your breaths as you stared at the door way.

Cross was standing there with Hunter. The two had shocked expressions at first, but then Crosshairs look turned into a small. What seemed to be, proud smile. Hunter just looked mortified, then glared. “You’re watching where we’re going, right?” He hissed, and the two of you were frozen. “I have the coordination set for the coordinates.” He clenched his jaw and eyes shut at his repeating of the word coordinates. Mentally cursing himself for not locking the door. “You better be paying attention, and just kissing, Maker.” Hunter muttered and walked out. Back to the bunks to probably lie down.

Crosshair was still leaning in the doorway. Pulling the toothpick from his lips with a smirk. Winking at Tech, then giving you a nod. “I knew you had it in you, Vod, don’t go doing anything I wouldn’t do.” He spoke, then walked out. Door shutting behind him.

Tech sunk into his seat. You still hovering above him. Climbing off a bit awkwardly. “We’ll never hear the end of this” Tech spoke in a mortified whisper. “It can’t be that bad... Right?” “Oh... It’s that bad.”