#It's dark and funny and dramatic and there will be explosions

[truly-sincerely]

If we're posting WIPs of new pages, then the cat is out of the bag.

I'm just gonna say it: We're bringing Opportunities back.

Once we finish reposting book 1 we'll start posting... book 2

Now you know!

[compressedrage]

OKAY SPOILERS FOR SONIC X SHADOW GENERATIONS: DARK BEGINNINGS EPISODE 3 BELOW

I meant to make this sooner but forgot, whoops–

Anyhoo, Team Dark is still the best.

It's very interesting that they're recapping Shadow's backstory, but I guess some people don't know and they want to make sure everyone's up to speed for the new game.

SHADOW SMILED. EVERYONE FREEZE.

Omega I still love you. Gosh he's so cool.

SHADOW CAUGHT A MISSILE. WHAT. That entire sequence was unbelievably awesome. That is how a fight against the Ultimate Lifeform should be. Him darting in and out of range as he attacks and moving too fast to see. The effects for Chaos Control btw? *chefs kiss* beautiful.

Shadow's spindash makes him look like a spinning ball of fire and I love it. I love that he saves the pilot at the end too. He's not a monster.

AND THE DRAMATIC WALK AWAY FROM THE EXPLOSION. SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG EVERYBODY.

"I wanted to destroy it." Sorry Omega, maybe next time. On the other hand, Omega probably wouldn't have thought to make sure no body was killed, so it's likely better that Shadow took care of this one.

I forget a lot of the time that the Ark is in space. Like, they need an entire space shuttle to get up there. Wild.

And the Commander is here! I didn't expect to see him, but it's a good thing he was here! His dynamic with Rouge is extremely funny to me.

And the comment that the only person who could have talked Shadow down is Maria?! And she died!?

And then the moment on the ship!? Shadow thinking about how his life could have been if Maria had survived?! And then telling himself to stop it, in the softest voice I've ever heard from Shadow?! Because he needs to focus?!

I'm going to implode!!

-------

Once again the animation in this episode SLAPPED, even if there was less action. There were still plenty of pretty explosions, and lasers, and fire. Like I said before, Shadow's Chaos Control was very cool to see, and I loved his spindash.

The assets for the space shuttle and the G.U.N console-thing are just beautiful, I think the low lighting makes everything look so good.

It's sad that this little mini-series is over, but I'm looking forward to actual game and seeing what they do with our favorite Ultimate Lifeform.

(crossing my fingers for more Team Dark content in the future tho 🤞)

[roseharpermaxwell]

RWRB FirstPrince Everything Else Fic Recs

These are some canon divergence, some sad things, unique things. Click below to see the favorites I couldn't fit anywhere else, but needed to share.

Can't Help Falling by beck17. G, 1.2k. “Since New Years?”

Henry asks the question so quietly, Alex almost didn’t hear it.

An idea sparked from the subtle look Henry gave Alex after the latter told Zahra their relationship had been going on since New Years.

We're all the way up by @clottedcreamfudge. T, 1.4k. "Just making sure you don't try to run the moment I bring up a very specific topic," Pez says lightly, hopping up onto a low table and swinging his legs like a child.

"The topic of me loosening up and attempting to have a good time at a party?" Henry asks blandly, and Pez rolls his eyes and sighs dramatically.

"The topic of you quite clearly sneaking off with dearest Alexander, presumably to do things I must immediately hear about in excruciating detail. Spare no expense in the retelling; I want to feel it."

I can't breathe, if you're not there by softcinnamonroll. T, 2k. One moment, Alex was laughing at some joke Henry had made, and then the next there was a loud noise from the TV and the livestream cut out, leaving Alex alone in their dark living room. At first, Alex was sure there had just been a power cut, or some technical difficulties that caused the stream to cut out, but then the messages and BREAKING NEWS notifications started pouring in.

BREAKING NEWS: Explosion at Prince Henry of Wales Charity Event. Casualties Unknown.

You Must Allow Me To Tell You by @everwitch-magiks. T, 2.4k. “I don’t suppose there's any chance you’d like to marry me, Alex?”

Alex blinks. Then he starts to grin. “Right. Funny. What were you actually gonna say?”

“... I wasn’t making a joke.”

Alex waits for a beat — there’s gotta be a punchline here somewhere — but it doesn’t come. Henry is still watching him expectantly. He looks terrifyingly sincere.

“You’re actually serious?”

“Yes.”

“You’re proposing to me?”

“I am, yes.”

“But you don’t even know me.”

“Astute observation.” Henry tilts his head to the side. “I can’t help but notice that you have yet to decline?”

Henry has a proposal. Alex has trouble remembering why he shouldn't accept.

It's Always One Step Forward, And Three Steps Back. by @alxclightwood. G, 2.8k. He was fine, he didn’t need to sleep.

He blinked several times, desperately trying to force his eyes open. But it was inevitable that there would come a time his eyes drifted closed, and didn’t open again.

What he didn’t anticipate however, was his blood sugars dropping whilst he slept, with no alarm to wake him to fix it.

you took the time to memorize me (my fears, my hopes, my dreams) by @coffeecatsme. T, 2.9k. “I know what you’re doing.”

Alex crosses his arms, arching his brow. Henry, to his credit, looks completely unimpressed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Really?” Alex wets his lips, enjoying Henry’s eyes following the movement, and lets a smile take over his face. He takes a step, closer to Henry, practically trapping him in front of the little coffeeshop.

“The ice skating,” Alex continues, taking another step, and he’s pretty much flush with Henry’s chest. Even though Henry tries to keep an impassive look, his eyes are glimmering under the afternoon light—he knows damn well what Alex is talking about. “The fire station. Indoor fucking skydiving.” He pokes Henry in the chest and grins. “You’re making my childhood dreams come true.”

Or, 4 times Henry makes Alex's childhood dreams come true, and 1 time he has to get creative.

Do we still have forever? by @hgejfmw-hgejhsf. M, 3k. Alex has a sudden, serious allergic reaction, and Henry can't help but think about losing him.

Powerless by floatingaway4. T, 3k. “Do you know what I’ve had to put up with in the last twelve hours?” 

Henry wants to point out that in that same twelve hours he’s had his body sliced open and an organ removed, but this doesn’t seem to be the time. He also got to sleep through his experience, while Alex was very much awake while dealing with Henry’s family. And Henry got the nice drugs, while Alex looks like he could use a drink.

hell was the journey but it brought me heaven by alec_rhee. E, 3.1k. While he was sitting in class and daydreaming about getting Henry naked the moment he got home, his phone vibrated wildly in his messenger bag. He heard the vibrations in class, and although his heart yearned for it to be Henry he knew it wouldn’t be him because his day was filled with meeting after meeting; the texts are most likely from Bug and Nora, he remembers thinking.

And well, he isn’t wrong. There are texts from June and Nora and none from Henry, but it’s the Google Alert –

BREAKING NEWS: PRINCE HENRY, BOYFRIEND OF FSOTUS ALEX CLAREMONT-DIAZ AND PRINCE OF WALES, INJURED IN CAR ACCIDENT

He reads the title of the article over and over and over again. He rubs his eyes and reads the title another three times.

This can’t be about my Henry, he thinks.

What I Need Tonight by @sparklepocalypse. E, 3.5k. It’s two in the morning on a Tuesday when the clatter of something hitting the bathroom floor startles Henry awake. At first, his groggy mind assumes it’s Alex – but then Alex snuffles in his sleep behind him and tightens his arms around Henry’s waist.

There’s another clatter, and then a shuffling noise, and Henry’s eyes widen. He reaches back and grabs Alex’s thigh, shaking him.

someday by rizcriz. T, 4k. “Where are you going?”

Henry freezes where he’s standing over his overnight bag, fingers still clasped around the tug on the zipper. His eyes slide closed of their own accord, dread pooling low in his gut. This was not how this was supposed to go. Alex is a deep sleeper, he should’ve been out the door and on a plane back to London long before he ever woke up. Not just for Henry’s sake, but for both of theirs.

This was not a conversation Henry wanted to have.

Or, Alex wakes up before Henry can sneak out.

i give you my heart (just to watch you waste it) by @villiageidiot. T, 4k. Henry moves to the U.S. when he’s ten years old. The very first time Alex finds him being picked on by some older students for sounding funny, everything changes. Alex shoves them to the ground, earns a detention, and becomes Henry’s best friend all in one fell swoop.

Well, they’re friends for Alex’s part.

For Henry, it’s always so much more.

(Five times fic wherein Alex never chooses Henry. Until he does.)

don't go where i can't follow by coffeecatsme. T, 4k. Henry turns away, hair silvery under the moonlight. He doesn’t even bother to look at Alex, and something like anger flashes in Alex’s gut when he sees him reach for his backpack, like it’s that easy to abandon Alex, like Alex didn’t bare his heart to him just a day ago. “You could’ve fucking said goodbye,” he whispers before he can think about it; his voice is quiet through the knot in his throat, yet it echoes in the room like a gunshot, stopping Henry in his tracks.

Alex wakes up at the lakehouse before Henry leaves.

All The Stars In The Sky by @absoluteaudacitywrites. T, 4k. Henry startles awake, blinking rapidly into the early morning gloom seeping into their bedroom and wondering hazily what woke him when two things become apparent.

One, Alex isn’t in bed with him.

Two, the sound coming from the bathroom is definitely what woke him and it is definitely Alex being quite violently sick.

you were more than just a short time by @hypnostheory. T, 4.2k. Alex leaves his mug on the porch railing. Inside the house is achingly hollow, an exhale with no inhale to follow. Alex feels like he can’t make a noise as he carefully pads back towards their bedroom. He pauses at their door, taking a steadying breath. He’s not as upset as he thought he’d be about this, having mentally prepared as the years ticked by and David grew older. Alex is okay.

Henry isn’t.

David the Beagle passes. Alex is there for Henry through his grief, and through the start of moving on

Tumbled Down and Tangled Up by @myheartalivewrites. E, 4.3k. “Yes, this is exactly how I always dreamed it would be. Locked in a cupboard with your elbow inside my rib cage,” Henry snipes. He sounds like he wants to punch Alex, which is probably the most Alex has ever liked him, so he follows an impulse and drives his elbow into Henry’s side, hard.

Henry lets out a muffled yelp, and the next thing Alex knows, he’s been yanked sideways by his shirt and Henry is halfway on top of him, pinning him down with one thigh. His head throbs where he’s clocked it against the linoleum floor, but he can feel his lips split into a smile.

nobody panic, but i've broken my leg by annesbonny. T, 5.2k. He collects his phone from Cash who's been holding onto his possessions, and shoots off a text to the group chat between pained breaths. nobody panic, but i’ve broken my leg. Then he slips it away again before he can read June's outraged response.

In which Alex Claremont Diaz breaks his leg at a charity Lacrosse game.

Ghosts by colorfulmoniker. M, 5.4k. After Henry leaves the lake house, Alex does not go after him. He doesn't storm Kensington in a fit of pique to call Henry an "obtuse fucking asshole." Instead, the pair spend nearly a year apart, both wrecked and miserable, until they find themselves on the list of speakers for an international conference.

baby, you were meant to follow me. by @chaa-kiao. T, 5.6k. “He doesn’t—” his breath hitches helplessly at the thought. “He doesn’t love me, June.” And, God, he’s fucking crying again.

The storm in his head rages on, his stomach sinking like a ship in its tide. Maybe Henry is exactly who Alex believes him to be: good and honest and true; maybe he’s perfect in every way Alex knows that he is and simply, plainly, doesn’t want him.

That's the worst possible answer to the questions that have become his entire being today. It sends another set of sobs hurling past his lips. The idea that all of this was real, Henry just doesn’t care that much, is sickening— debilitating— Alex doesn’t know how to face it.

Or: Henry and Alex never defined their relationship. Angst ensues.

simply, don't by rizcriz. T, 5.7k. The first voicemail notification sits in Henry’s inbox when he lands in London. He stares at it for a long while before quietly dismissing it and shoving his phone unceremoniously into his pocket. His phone feels like lead in his pocket the entire ride back to the palace, fingers itching to pull it out and just listen. But he’s stronger than that, isn’t he? He left, he got on the plane, he made it home without once looking back.

He had, though, contemplated the many steps it would take to turn around. Wondered if he could make it back with enough time to climb back into Alex’s bed and pretend none of this nightmare—the confession of love—had ever happened. But for every step he envisions himself taking back, three more lead him straight to Kensington Palace, because for whatever it is that he wants, there is only what he can have, and it is not a life with one Alexander Gabriel Claremont-Diaz.

Or, Henry actually answers one of Alex's calls.

think I know where you belong (think I know it's with me) by coffeecatsme. T, 5.8k. “You got me a flower?” Henry gingerly uncurls Alex’s fingers and looks at it. Alex gulps and manages a nod.

“I know it’s not much—” he tries to say, but then Henry’s grinning and Alex quite forgets why he was so worried about in the first place. He finds himself mirroring the smile. “You like it?”

“I love it.”

Or, 5 times Alex is in love with Henry and 1 time Henry loves him back.

After Everything, I Must Confess I Need You by @mainstreamelectricalparade. T, 5.8k. “Fuck,” he gasps, tears springing to his eyes and mixing with the rainwater on his face. He’s not sure if the tears are from the asphalt biting into his palms, or if it’s a release of the emotions he’s been trying to shove down deep ever since he woke up to an empty top bunk at the lake house.

Wait. Asphalt.

Over the pounding rain, Alex hears the shrill sound of a horn honking, and looks up just in time to be blinded by a pair of headlights coming straight at him.

When Alex dares Henry to tell him to leave, Henry actually does. Neither of them could have predicted what happens next.

dearthisbe by @dani-dabbles. G, 6.6k. “If someone in this room had told me before the Queen,” he grits out, “then maybe I wouldn't be completely cut off from my boyfriend right now.”

Alex glowers at his mother and ignores the cowed looks of the various staffers lining the Oval Office. Two days of no contact. Not even a carrier pigeon - or a swan since the queen apparently has them all at their disposal - has been sent their way.

OR: the email plot is discovered before it can be leaked, the palace doesn’t handle the news of their relationship well, and Henry and Alex are left trying to find their way back to each other.

come and get me by rizcriz. T, 6.9k. The email arrives 8 days after Henry left the lake house. He contemplates deleting it without reading, but it sits in his Alex inbox, where there are over seventy emails favourited, and somehow it feels wrong and weirdly impersonal.

As if leaving without a note were any different.

He stares at the from line with an aching longing that seeps into his veins. It settles on his heart like a tangible thing; something warranted and cruel that casts shackles around the aorta and locks them tight so that he might never love again.

or, alex sends an email instead of flying to KP.

I'd Wanna Be Felled by You, Held by You by Anonymous. E, 7k. Henry has been hiding his second gender since Alex moved into his apartment three years ago. When Alex accidentally triggers Henry's first heat in years, Henry asks Alex to cuddle him through it.

everything's growing in our garden by matherine. T, 7.2k. That night, in the safety of his hotel room on the outskirts of the Olympic Village, Henry couldn’t catch his breath. He coughed and coughed, feeling like he was choking on nothing, but there was a scratching sensation in his throat that he just couldn’t shake – until a single blue petal flew past his lips, landing in the porcelain bowl of the sink.

After an hour of painstaking Googling, he learns that it’s a Texas bluebonnet. He also learns what the fact that he’s coughing up petals means – the beginning stages of Hanahaki Disease. Rare, but not unheard of, according to the NHS website he browses in an incognito tab. Common in royal bloodlines (thank you, inbreeding).

"Only curable if the afflicted’s love is requited with a declaration," he reads, and slams his laptop closed with a bitter laugh, wet with tears. "A surgical procedure removing the afflicted’s capacity for love may be performed if the love remains unrequited. Otherwise, the condition is terminal."

So, then. He has no chance.

you're on your own, kid (yeah you can face this) by coffeecatsme. T, 7.2k. “Let’s get it over with.” Henry attempts to move, but Shaan stops him with a hand over his arm, concern flickering in his eyes.

“Are you okay, Henry?” he asks, so silently that the PPOs wouldn’t even be able to hear it. Henry doesn’t even blink. He doubts that word exists in his vocabulary anymore—he doubts it’s in the cards for him. But he knows the script.

He forces a smile on his face. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Or, 5 times Henry feels alone in the world, and 1 time he realizes he isn't.

every version of you (i love) by coffeecatsme. M, 7.6k. “So,” the voice narrates as the man squishes the dog’s cheeks and laughs at himself. “There’s this guy that lives next to me with the cutest beagle in the world and this little guy climbs to the fence every day to drop his toys off at, like, 5:30 on the dot, I’m not kidding.” The camera shows the man boop the dog’s nose and press a little kiss to his forehead. There’s a ball in his hands that he hands to the dog, but it slips from his mouth all over again, making the man reach down to grab it. He glares at the dog, but even then he’s still smiling. “And this guy always walks by and picks up the stuff and it’s the cutest fucking thing ever you have no idea.” The camera zooms in farther into the man’s smile, genuine and wild, as he pushes his wild curls away from his face. His eyes flicker up when another figure walks into the frame, his blonde hair falling over his forehead in waves. The man’s smile, impossibly, widens.

“Oh. I’m also pretty sure he has a crush on my neighbor.”

Or, 5 times David greets Alex with something that belongs to Henry, and 1 time he greets Alex with something that belongs to both of them.

I'm Fine With My Spite and My Tears (and my beer and my candles) by Megg1223. E, 7.7k. Henry leaves Alex at the lake house, but Alex doesn't storm Kensington. What happens when they see each other after three months? With the election right around the corner can Alex keep it together enough not to cause another international incident? Alex just needs to get through the night and then he can forget about the boy who broke his heart, but he's finding it increasingly difficult as the night goes on.

Downburst by @cricketnationrise. E, 8.5k. Amy’s sudden shout of alarm cuts off whatever Zahra was going to say. Alex stares at Amy, uncomprehendingly. His heart is racing, his body already flooding with instinctive fear, brain scrambling to catch up, to process what she said—

Cash is at his side between one blink and the next, practically tackling him to the ground and oh—

That’s a gunshot.

in the shadow of two gunmen by matherine. M, 8.6k. There are over four hundred and thirty-three million guns in civilian possession in the United States. Alex isn’t sure where on the campaign trail that fact embedded itself into his brain — he thinks he picked it up from some memo between Minnesota and Missouri — but he’s never been able to forget it. It's one of those things he turns over and over in his head, running the numbers as if he could calculate the possibility of a bullet embedding itself in his brain.

In the end, Alex thinks that it evens out. More people want to kill him than the average person (and that number has grown exponentially over the years) but now he also has Secret Service protection and can’t go anywhere without a motorcade. So, really, statistically, he figures that he has just as much of a chance of being shot by one of those 433 million firearms as anyone else, give or take a few decimal points here and there. But doing the math doesn’t make it any less terrifying when it actually happens.

Locked In by @three-drink-amy. M, 9.2k. After their night together in Paris, Henry and Alex get quarantined in their hotel, locked in for two full weeks.

Henry's Cold, Empty Tower by @dracowillhearaboutthis. G, 9.6k. “I want you,” Henry said, slowly but clearly, “to leave.”

When Alex storms Kensington Palace, Henry sends him away. Then, their relationship gets leaked, and it's Henry's turn to fight for Alex.

There's Something Missing in My Heart by allmylovesatonce. M, 9.8k. When Alex goes to London to tell him he loves him, Henry sends him away. How do both of them react to being without each other and what happens when their emails are still leaked?

So I Will Weather the Storm by Mags (sparklepocalypse). E, 9.8k. They’re in the air twenty minutes before the next report comes in, this time over their headsets. “Patient is located on the eastern side of Sgòr Gaoith. He reports a sudden snow squall came up, and he lost his footing and took a fall. He’s conscious and reports no major injuries, but he’s stuck on a ledge and can’t make it back to the trail. Patient is wearing a red jacket and a black knit cap and states his name is – ” there’s a burst of static over the radio.

“Please repeat the patient’s name,” Henry says into the headset mic as Schlosser programs the mountain’s location into the GPS.

There’s a bit more static, and then the dispatcher states, “Alexander Claremont-Diaz.”

(Or, a movieverse canon divergent AU wherein Henry is in the RAF and Cakegate still takes place, but the PR campaign doesn't happen – and two months after Cakegate, Alex does something dumb on a mountain in Scotland.)

a series of non-disclosure dilemmas series by everwitch. E, 10k. It takes a bit of time, before they manage to find the right person – a guy they’re both into, who is into what they’re into, and who is willing to sign a massive NDA even before they’ve made it to the bedroom. But once they do? It’s good. It’s so, so good. Still, nothing lasts forever, and when Theodore’s career takes him across the pond, Alex and Henry must consider whether or not they should start searching for someone else. Except in the end, they don’t have to search at all – Kenji is equal parts a surprise, and an absolute delight.

But the biggest surprise of all is the fact that, somewhere between a lot of really fun sex and some lazy, post-coital Star Wars banter, Alex and Henry end up with a matchmaking scheme that could certainly rival any cinematic drama. Theo, and Kenji. So different, but so well suited.

But how to get them together?

(did my love aid and abet you?) by alasse. T, 11k. That night in Kensington Palace, Henry told Alex to leave. Eleven years later, Alex watches on the news as Henry comes out, and abdicates. A story of what came before, and what comes after.

i vowed i would always be yours ('cause we survived the great war) by coffeecatsme. T, 12k. Mary Mountchristen-Windsor dies on June 5th, 2020, on a Tuesday morning, after an unexpected heart attack takes her before she’s rushed to a hospital.

Alex Claremont-Diaz hates Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor. It's a fact, written in stone, deep enough that nothing, he believes, can sand it off. Until he bumps into the prince at his grandmother's funeral and sees a different side of him.

Or, 5 times Alex and Henry have to hide themselves and 1 time they don't have to.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words by TintedMirrors. E, 12k. "It’s not an innocent picture. It’s anything but. Henry is lying on his back in the wet sand of the beach, body completely bare and naked in a way that should have only been for Alex’s eyes, and Alex is lying on top of him. Alex’s still wearing his swim trunks, but he’s cradled in Henry’s thighs, his body blanketing Henry’s as he kisses him deeply. His arm is caught between them and Alex remembers exactly what he was doing. In the picture, there’s a peek of his fingers at the bottom of Henry’s thighs, and while it doesn’t show Henry’s cock or asshole, it’s clear where Alex’s fingers are.

Inside of Henry."

A picture of a private moment between Alex and Henry is taken while they're on vacation, which leads to a media frenzy.

Alex can't stop looking at it...

A Parent's Love by herebecauseimqueer. NR, 13k. An exploration of who Henry would be and how the events of RWRB would be different if Arthur never got sick.

Once I get a taste by clottedcreamfudge. E, 16k. “Please,” Alex begs, on fire with a clawing desperate need. “Fuck, please, I’ll do anything. Henry.”

Henry, entire body rigid with tension, slowly shakes his head. Alex sees his mouth – red from where Alex has been kissing him, biting him, well on his way to eating Henry alive – form the word no, even though he can’t hear it past the blood rushing in his ears.

Then Henry turns and leaves, and Alex digs his fingers into the cheap plywood of his own desk as he tries desperately not to fall to the floor.

Which is not, as it turns out, where this story starts.

A Heart Even More Your Own. by chaa_kiao. T, 16k. “Guess you’ll be writing those poems after all.” He swallows. "I should go."

Henry’s mind— every part of him, really— his heart, his body, his fucking soul— is screaming at him to take it all back. To hell with the monarchy, the American presidency, damn it all. This is the man he’s spent his entire life loving and he’s throwing it away for a legacy he doesn’t give a single fuck about. He forces out a rough “I think so,” but he can’t hear it over the ringing in his ears.

“I love you.”

“Alex—”

“I know,” Alex says. “I just had to say it.”

Or: Alex and Henry getting back together takes a little bit longer this time.

Growth Is Uncomfortable (Because You've Never Been Here Before) by Jaistiel. M, 17k. "He said if I wanted to help, they would be instrumental in understanding how." Henry outright laughed at this. It was a hollow, joyless sound, and Philip, to his credit, merely looked chastised instead of angry.

"Do you? Want to help, that is." Henry narrowed his eyes and scrutinized the emotion written on Philip's face. He had never been easy to read, always hidden behind the stuffy upper class posture of a royal, but now it seemed that some of that wall built around him had slipped away.

"Yes." He didn't expand on his answer, didn't fill the room with platitudes and meaningless explanations. His response was, in full, simply: yes. Henry stared at him in shock.

In the week following the leak, Philip has a series of conversations that lead him down a path of introspection and understanding. Each told through a different POV.

I feel the beating of your heart, I see the shadows on your face by @anincompletelist. M, 18k. It’s certainly not what Alex would have predicted a few days prior. If someone had told him he’d be tenderly embracing his self-imposed enemy after switching bodies with him for seventy-two hours and embarking on an unintentional journey of self discovery and then finally finding their way back to each other to ask for a True Love’s Kiss that may or may not break the curse that flipped their lives upside down -

Well, Alex would have told them to fuck off.

Sure As the Stars in the Sky by anincompletelist. E, 20k. It shouldn't matter that Alex has been present for each and every one of Henry's most important life milestones, sometimes the singular catalyst for them. It shouldn't be important that he's grown to be more familiar to Henry than even some of his own family members, that part of him is burrowed so deeply into Henry's subconscious that he can taste it sometimes, that even when Alex crashes in, spirited and passionate, it feels like an easy exhale; like coming home.

It shouldn't matter, but it does.

flatline by rizcriz. T, 21k. Alex gets the call at 7:57am.

It’s from an unknown number, so he answers it with an accent on his tongue and laughter in his throat, ready to troll the scammer for all they’re worth. But the voice on the other side of the line is serious, solemn, when she asks, “Is this, I apologize, all I’ve been given are initials, AGCD?”

He frowns, turning away from the coffee shop he’d been about to enter. “Who’s asking?”

There’s a moment of hesitation on the other end. “There’s been an incident. On the individual's phone, there’s a sticker. It says, if found, return to AGCD, alongside this phone number. Does it sound familiar?”

Alex freezes in the middle of the sidewalk. “What kind of incident?”

Or, Henry's been in an accident.

Pump The Volume by absoluteaudacity. M, 22k. Zahra, sitting across the table from Alex, gives him a stony glare. “Aids?” she signs and he shakes his head obstinately. His hearing aids make his ears itch and he isn’t wearing them in his own house, even if that house is The White House.

everybody needs someone series by anincompletelist (soldouthaz). E, 24k. It would hurt less, Alex guesses, if he wasn’t head over heels for the guy he’s supposed to be fucking through an ancient one-sided sex curse with that was partially — a lot, actually — his own fault.

But. It’s not like there’s a fucking handbook.

Alex has looked. 

Claremont 2008 by @happiness-of-the-pursuit. M, 26k. What if Ellen Claremont had gotten elected in 2008 instead of Obama? An alternate timeline story of FirstPrince.

2009 at Buckingham Palace for tea. A sleepover after a quinceañera in 2010. The 2012 London Olympics. A 2014 Model UN Conference. A funeral in 2015. College and another campaign trail.

And the texts, facetimes, and chain emails in between.

Vacation, Meant to Be Spent Alone by allmylovesatonce. E, 29k. Alex has the perfect trip planned out for himself after his graduation. The last thing he expects is for his room to be double booked. The worst part of it all is that he'll be forced to share the room with his nemesis: Prince Henry of Wales.

Oblivion by milowren. NR, 31k. What if the moment in the hospital wasn’t a false alarm and the publicity surrounding the forced bromance between Alex and Henry had the adverse effect of them being kidnapped together?

Someday Soon I’ll See You (But Now You’re Out Of Sight) by MaryaDmitrievnaLikesSundays. NR (MCD), 38k. Alexander Claremont-Diaz was twenty-eight years old when a car crash took his life.

The entire world grieved, and the entire world remembered.

But for some people, it wasn’t just a figurehead that died. It was a friend, a brother, a son. A husband. And remembering all of Alex was a hell of a task to undertake.

Or, how six people in Alex’s life work through his death.

You'll Get Better Soon ('Cause you have to) by Megg1223. T, 38k. Dr. Eden sighs and looks them both in the eyes. “I’m not going to lie to you. There is a possibility that he will never recover his memories. But, there are things we can do to help him along. I’ve already told him about the memory loss. He knows it’s 2023 and that he lost almost four years of memories. I think it may be best to update him on his current situation. His day to day life is drastically different then it was in 2019, is that correct?”

“Yeah, I would say.” Alex huffs out a bitter laugh.

Henry is in an accident and thinks it's still 2019. He still believes Alex hates him, and Alex is a just as much of a mess as you think he would be.

all the rumors are true by fxckingeyelashes. E, 53k. The door slams open in the middle of the night. Henry and Alex both shoot up, blinking through the dark.

“Wha- Zahra, what the hell?” Alex mumbles, making sure to keep the blanket over their naked hips.

Zahra exhales slowly as she flips the lights on. “We have a situation. You two need to get dressed and meet me in the office. It’s… it’s your emails. Someone’s hacked the server. They’re public.”

Alex isn’t sure he remembers how to breathe. Henry’s the first to move, grabbing the small trash can from beside Alex’s bed just in time to get sick.

//

Or, the one where the emails are leaked, but Alex and Henry are together when it happens. Bits from the book, bits from the movie, bits from my own personal AU I’ve created in my head.

Don't Initiate a Handshake, Always Address Them Properly, and For God's Sake, No Tiaras Until 6pm by TuppingLiberty. E, 63k. What happens when the White House decides to be proactive rather than reactive? Alex is brilliant and kind, but he's in need of a little polishing before he attends the royal wedding, and who to provide it better than Prince Henry? After all, they're both beholden to NDAs and with Princess Bea visiting as well, it's easy to pass off the two week visit as goodwill ambassadorship for both countries. No one has to know Henry is tutoring Alex.

So Alex is going to be left alone in the White House with his mortal enemy and three meddling sisters learning all about royal etiquette and protocol.

What's the worst that can happen?

Things I Cannot Accept by @sprigsofviolets. T, 69k. In 2016, Ellen Claremont lost the presidential election.

In 2019, Alex Claremont-Diaz is not the first son of the United States, so he’s shocked when his path crosses with Prince Henry for the first time in almost four years.

What Do I Know by allmylovesatonce. E, 83k. After a bad accident, Alex finally wakes up from a week-long coma. His family and friends are so relieved until they find that he has memory loss, forgetting the last five plus years. For Henry, he's forgotten their entire relationship. How do they go forward when Alex still thinks he hates Henry, but Henry is wearing his wedding ring?

I only tag an author once per post, but I'm still figuring out firstprince author handles. If you see one I may not know or find a broken link, please give me a heads up!

Master List of RWRB FirstPrince Recs

Master List of Recommendations

[homestuckreplay]

it is a truth universally acknowledged that Dads Love Shaving

(page 484-497)

8/16/2009 Wheel Spin: Character Switch Verdict: TECHNICALLY CORRECT (although the Rose -> John switch doesn't feel jarring while they're interacting)

8/17/2009 Wheel Spin: Dramatic Irony Verdict: It's Not That Deep

After the serious psychological issues raised in recent puppet-themed updates, this set of pages is good fun and wacky antics, and it's refreshing! First, John and Rose share in a Sweet Bro & Hella Jeff reference, and Rose is giggling for real even while she redirects the conversation. It's sweet to see that these two genuinely enjoy Dave's work and even reference it when he's not around. John's 'he's so dumb!!' (p.485) and GG's 'he is so silly!' (p.293) are shaking hands.

The proliferation of oily clown imps throughout the house makes for some great visuals. The different color variants don't appear to drop different types of grist, but they look great, and the messy, overpopulated, colorful living room of p.494 is a world away from the clean, empty and largely sterile environment of p.48. By collecting more cruxite dowels from the cruxtruder I think the imps are technically helping John, even if it's not their intention.

These little guys seem very chaotic neutral, and don't seem to have an agenda beyond causing mischief via repurposing objects already in/on the house. I'm curious on if that's caused by the harlequin prototyping going deeper than their outfits, or if that's just how the low level enemies always work.

The one imp falling into the void on p.485 when Rose deletes the platform is very funny, and I'd love it if that imp somehow showed up again in the late game. Crack theory says that's the Wayward Vagabond.

Probably the highlight of these pages is Nanna's explosive baking powers. She's somehow made several hundred cookies already and needs to stack them up on the floor, countertops, sink, stove, fridge and cabinet. However, the imps are not good boys and therefore not allowed any treats.

The fact that as a seemingly passive questgiver NPC, Nannasprite has laser eye beams and can choose to use them to help the player character, is an interesting fact about Sburb. It means that prototyping the sprite with something/someone who will be friendly to the player can give them an advantage in the game. Unfortunately my Sburb OC Todd from Missouri prototyped his sprite with the ashes of his racist uncle who died in a monster truck accident driving back from a 2004 Bush rally and he's so mad at Todd and keeps trying to make his life way worse and convince him to ally with the forces of darkness.

I'm a huge fan of the 'Dads love shaving. It's basically all they do.' line purely because I remember being a kid and thinking 'wow, my dad sure does spend a lot of time shaving.' From what I remember of being middle school age, going within the hour from deep existential thoughts about the horrors of my life to wildly misinterpreting the amount of time it takes an adult to do a basic task, is a very realistic experience.

Silly as these pages are, Rose beginning to build upwards in earnest at the same time that the Slimer pogo ride is framed as John's steed kind of frames this moment as John setting off on his hero's journey following Nannasprite's call to action. That's fun. Bouncing around on the pogo ride really fits him best, considering that when he's packing for this journey he takes two cans of shaving cream purely for the prankster's gambit instead of anything practical. <3

[woodsfae]

B5 s04e03 The Summoning previous episode - table of contents

OK. I saw a spoiler saying that Lyta blew up a planet with her mind. And now every episode I'm like "IS SHE GOING TO BLOW UP A PLANET NOW" and she hasn't done it. This episode title isn't exactly planet-explosion material to me. And also, planet-exploding sounds like season finale type of shit to me. But I'm getting very impatient for the planetary explosions.

Love Susan's new mission, but am worried that she's going to get picked off out there alone, like G'Kar. 

And she taught herself Minbari uh. To a degree. lol!! Assigned translator politely, but firmly. 

"Tell the crew: anyone who laughs answers to me personally."

I am personally impressed that Delenn and Marcus both contained themselves. 

Wow, G'Kar is not having a good time. Ooof. fuckin. Too tragic! Give G'Kar a few wins to balance out the entire lifetime of extreme shit. 

Delenn voiceover after the credits. They are leaning hard on recapping every character's whereabouts at the beginning of each episode. I am assuming they didn't want the audience to be too lost if they missed an episode or two as it aired? 

Zack Allen is feeling authoritative! Telling Delenn what must be done. An unfortunately for my dislike of him, he is right, and they ought to go look for G'Kar. 

Londo got a haircut, looks like. That crest is definitely shorter. I find Londo and his storyline to be sad and tired. 

Torturers are unionized on Centauri, lovely. 

And this is an excessively awful fate for anyone, let alone one of my long-term faves like G'Kar. 

Vir: Emperor Cartagia needs to be stopped, but I don't know about regicide. Cartagia: Tried to chop G'Kar's hands off, lol. Vir: Londo, you have my murder blessing.

Zack Allen vs a rogue faction of PsiCorps? A Shadows-collaborating wing? 

not-Kosh has robbed Lyta of all but one of her belongings! Did he even let her keep a change of clothes? Everyone's got such unique problems. Lyta's is that she's being terrorized by a god having a meltdown over realizing mortality is a thing that applies to themself.

introducing the one, the only, psipuppet!Garibaldi. He has had repeated interest in PsiCorps and has investigated them, has contacts in them. I wonder if that's going to help him resist or anything.

Dang Lyta. I don't remember seeing the gills before. not-Kosh is a dick. 

Partner: "Dark Garibaldi! Dark Kotch!"

His memory of B5 is imperfect. 

fuck off, Londo. 

G'Kar won't oblige their oppressors...and he doesn't let a single hitch hit his voice when speaking with Londo, either. Speaks volumes. 

"I hope she appreciates it," & "Me too, *glances at Susan*" is toooo funny. 

There is no end to the drama Cartagia is into. 

The torture is gratuitous. The way G'Kar's story and later writing is handled is definitely my most major gripe. I don't find it to be well done for a lot of reasons I might write an essay about one of these days.

I'm afraid I don't have any theories about who was able to override B5's security. Sheridan? And reveal his escape in a dramatic flashback later? 

lol, yes. And to disprove Delenn's naysayers so immediately and firmly. 

Protester: "Captain we thought you were dead." Sheridan: "I was. I'm better now." 

Sheridan's plotline on the other hand really tickles my fancy. His legend is fucking wild, and now he's bartered for his life with the eldest of the elder gods, and returned from the dead and promised Delenn he'd do it again. 

Lorien is there! On B5! lmfao. I guess when you've hung out with two gods, fought and killed other gods, it ain't no thing to have the elder god hanging out. 

Oh fuck, the Vorlons destroyed an entire planet and it's 4 million inhabitants in order to remove the Shadows and their influence. That is an extreme position and escalation. It kinda just makes sense to me that this is an ideological struggle between the Vorlons and Shadows. That's a lot of lower order races caught in a really big vice. 

And the League knows much less about Vorlons and their weaknesses than the Shadows and theirs. 

epic! It is continually impressive how much this sci-fi feels like high fantasy, and how correct and exciting it is for the main characters to create their own great deeds that rival the gods and all their powers. 

Also....I cannot believe I was excited about planets blowing up at the beginning of the episode. I didn't mean blow up planets like that!"

and another!

[tobiasdrake]

Digimon Adventure 01x41 - The Raging Sea King! MetalSeadramon / Sea-Sick and Tired

Previously on Digimon Adventure: Piemon invited the Chosen Children to see the show he's been rehearsing. But when they weren't very impressed, he started stabbing people instead. Fucking auteurs, man. Some people can't handle a little criticism.

I would love to tell you where that leaves us, but before we can begin, the dub needs to finish the previous episode first.

We open on Piximon giving the kids' barrier bubble a hard bop again.

Piximon: You're as ready as you'll ever be! Go get 'em! (Piximon bops the bubble and sends them away) Izzy: I think that was meant to be encouraging. Kari: (flatly) He has an awful lot of confidence in us. (Piximon turns and faces the Dark Masters) Piedmon: You may have fooled those silly children with this brave act, but we know better, don't we? Piximon: What makes you think it's just an act!? (Slow pan out from the coliseum) Kari: Oh, it doesn't seem right just leaving him there-- OHH!? (bright flash) Tai: (matter of factly) Remember, he wanted it this way.

Izzy shits on Piximon's last words. Kari's like "Maybe we should go back OH GOD HE DIED." It's hilarious the way the explosion signifying his death suddenly spooks her like that during her line, and I genuinely don't know if it was meant to be. Then Tai's like "Eh, it was his call. Moving on." XD Wow, guys.

Today's episode begins with the Children at their destination. Lost in a thick fog, they can't make heads or tails of where Piccolomon's final barrier brought them to.

Taichi: Where are we? Sora: There's sand under our feet. Yamato: We could be in a desert. Koushiro: Uh, I smell salt.... Mimi: Are those waves? Jou: It's the ocean!

There's something funny about Yamato speculating that we might be in a desert while we clearly see the ocean in front of them. Dramatic irony isn't just for drama.

The fog gradually lifts, giving the kids a better view of their surroundings.

Takeru: I'm starting to see things more clearly. Hikari: The fog is disappearing.

Once the kids can see more clearly, Taichi and Yamato check on the others.

Taichi: Are you all okay? Sora: No, we aren't okay. Everyone's exhausted. Yamato: In any case, do we know where we are?

Being bounced like ping-pong balls between the Dark Masters hasn't left the children in the best of states. Poor Mimi had to watch an old friend sacrifice his life for her, and also Chuumon. This was not the victory lap that the kids, high on success and new Ultimate evolutions, were anticipating.

The dub uses the clearing of the fog as a bit of an awkward transition line. Tai speaks up to announce that it's clearing while we're still fading from Piximon's death explosion to the foggy beach in the first place.

Tai: Look, the fog is finally clearing! Joe: Great. Now we can clearly see that we're lost! Izzy: It's more productive to think of ourselves as on our way, Joe. Matt: (sarcastically) Tch, yeah. I feel better already. T.K.: All I know is that I'm getting pretty hungry! Kari: And I'm getting cold! Tai: But everybody's okay, right? Besides being hungry and cold and lost.... Sora: Don't forget frightened, tired, and upset about PIximon. Matt: Otherwise, we're fine.

They start by taking out the geographic guessing game banter and exchange it for bickering. Honestly, though, I do like the bickering here and the subsequent conversation about the group's feelings. It conveys the impression that these kids are high-strung and are psychologically hanging on by a thread right now. What happened has utterly shattered their confidence plus, as Sora points out, they're all grieving on top of it.

The kids look around to try and get their bearings. They quickly find an incredibly helpful landmark.

Koushiro: I feel like I've been here before... Ah!

As soon as Koushiro gasps, everyone whips around to see what he's looking at. Probably a good reflex for them to have developed in this place.

There, on the beach, are the destroyed remains of a series of phone booths.

Koushiro: Broken telephone booths....

Taichi, Yamato, and their Digimon all stare in wide-eyed shock, gasping. Flashback to the phone booths before they were destroyed.

Yamato: Ah! It's those telephone booths! Taichi: You're right. This is the beach on File Island where we met our Digimon for the first time and set off on our journey.

Taichi's remark is a little dry, but it's been thirty-nine episodes since we saw these phone booths. It's probably a good idea to explain the context for kids who hopped in somewhere in the middle.

In the dub:

Izzy: I have a feeling we've been here before. Wait a minute, look! (Everyone looks at the phone booths) Izzy: Those smashed-up phone booths! Sora: You don't think that they could be the same ones, do you? Tai: Of course! I can't believe it. This whole time, we thought we were making all this progress but now it looks like we've just been traveling in one big circle!

Tai, what the fuck are you talking about?

We did not "travel in one big circle" and end up here. That's not.

We did not get here by traveling. Our goal wasn't traveling in the first place. There was... A lot of plot has....

What?

I am genuinely baffled by the words that the dub team chose to put in Tai's mouth. It still captures the idea that we have returned to a place we were once at but his outrage over "traveling in a circle" and unmaking our progress is contextually bizarre.

Meanwhile, the Dark Masters have retreated to the top of Spiral Mountain, where Piemon has scouted the children's location with his giant-ass telescope.

Piemon: I've spotted the Chosen Children and their Digimon. MetalSeadramon: As the king of the seas, the coast belongs to me. The lives of the Chosen Children and their Digimon are mine to take. Now, who should I use from my Deep Savers Ankoku Gundan?

MetalSeadramon's army is called "Deep Savers Ankoku Gundan", mixing English and Japanese while directly referencing the name of the V-Pet release that he's from. Fans of mech anime might recognize that last word; gundan is the Japanese word for military armed forces.

Ankoku, meanwhile, means "darkness" - not quite "evil" as the subtitle up there suggests. Though darkness and evil are often related ideas, it's best here to not be poetic with it and leave it at darkness due to the association with MetalSeadramon's faction. Fitting that a Dark Master would have an ankoku gundan.

(From an American perspective, calling them an army also seems weird because. Like. They aren't ground troops. They'd be more like Marines over here. But different cultures have different standards for armed forces terminology.)

If you were to try to localize this for Americans, something like the "Deep Savers Dark Forces" would make sense to me. The dub has its own solution: Not mentioning that MetalSeadramon has an army at his disposal at all.

Piedmon: How small they look from here. Like ants! Strange that such little creatures could cause SO MUCH TROUBLE!!! MetalSeadramon: They won't for long! They're standing on the edge of my territory now: The sea! I'll be the one to finish these DigiDestined once and for all! Piedmon: Hmm, bold words! But you're not the first to make such a boast, MetalSeadramon! MetalSeadramon: But I will be the last! They'll be shark bait before the day is through!

...okay, now it's Piedmon's turn in the "What the fuck are you on about?" chair. He's so mad and. Like. The kids haven't fucking done anything yet. XD

Piedmon is coming at this from the angle of Rita Repulsa plotting her 87th scheme to destroy the Power Rangers but. Like. At this point, the Dark Masters have had one altercation with the Chosen Children that they handily won. Why is he so mad?

Piedmon is so mad that MetalSeadramon doesn't even get to bring up his Deep Savers Ankoku Gundan.

Why is everybody so mad? XD

While MetalSeadramon is picking out his forces, the Children try and figure out next steps.

Koushiro: Since we're back on File Island.... Yamato: Is there a meaning to it? Sora: We must have been sent to File Island for a reason, right? Taichi: But what are we supposed to do here-- Voice: HELP ME!!!

The kids look and see some poor 'mon flailing and screaming out in the ocean.

Takeru: Someone's drowning! Hikari: We have to help them! Takeru: But our Digimon are tired.... Hikari: Then we help them ourselves! Takeru: Oh!

Hikari sprints for the shoreline, ready to dive into the water and swim out there herself - with Takeru trailing behind her. Fortunately, Taichi and Yamato's Big Brother Alarms start blaring in their brains and they jump in, physically stopping their younger siblings.

Yamato: TAKERU!!! Taichi: Hikari, wait! Let's all go help them. Yamato: We can use that canoe over there.

Leaving their Digimon Partners on the shore, the eight children pile into the convenient nearby canoe. This definitely is not a trap.

In the dub, the kids are still inexplicably whining that returning to File Island again somehow means they've accomplished nothing.

Matt: So we've just gone in one big circle, huh? Makes the whole thing seem kinda pointless, doesn't it? Sora: Hold on, maybe that's it! Maybe the pointlessness of it is the whole point! Agumon: Say what? Tai: (sarcastic) Thanks for the philosophy; That's a big help. Voice: HEEEELP SAVE ME!!! Mimi: Look! Out there! Someone's drowning! Kari: Somebody's gotta do something! T.K.: They're too tired; They'll be drowned themselves. Kari: Okay, then in that case, we'll have to go! (Tai and Matt intervene) Tai: Kari! Matt: Yo, wait up, T.K. Tai: Maybe someone bigger should go. Matt: We can use that outrigger. T.K.: I'm coming too! Kari: ME TOO!!! Tai: Okay, okay. Sora: Wait up! I'm coming too! Mimi: I can help!

I want to make a "The real xyz was the friends we made along the way" joke but I genuinely do not know what the kids think they have failed to achieve by returning here.

Matt's totally casual, "Yo, wait up" made me laugh. What a weird vibe. XD

I do like that Sora and Mimi volunteer themselves to help, rather than Taichi speaking for the group that they'll all go do this.

Making the worst decision imaginable, the children set out by themselves to go help the drowning 'mon.

Voice: HELP ME!!! HELP ME!!!

As the children approach, their target starts to come into view. A single horn sticking up from the water, with an inflatable tube around it.

Mimi: ...huh? How can they be drowning when they have an inflatable tube?

Suddenly, Shellmon explodes up from the water, with the rinky-dink tube dangling from one of their shell spikes.

Shellmon: SHELLLLLLLLLMOOOOOOOOON!!! Taichi: HUH!?!? Hikari: Do you know them, Onii-chan? Taichi: We fought them once before! We can't win this! RUN FOR IT!

Gotta appreciate Shellmon screaming their name like a Pokemon in case there's any confusion about which Digimon this is. XD Togemon does this too sometimes and I am just. I'm a sucker for any time a fighter shouts their own name as a battle cry and lunges into combat.

In the dub:

Voice: HELP ME!!! HEEEELP!!! Tai & Matt: Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! Voice: (deep voice) Hohoho hahahaha! Mimi: Did his voice get lower or what? (Shellmon ambush) Shellmon: RAAARGH!!!

The dub puts a commercial break here, as Shellmon reveals himself. Good spot to use for that commercial cliffhanger. Then we come back to Shellmon revealing himself again.

Shellmon: RAAARGH!!! Tai: Whoa! Kari: Guys! A sea monster! Tai: You can say that again! That's Shellmon, and he's not here to play water polo! PADDLE LIKE CRAZY!!!

So, the bad is that we lose Mimi pointing out the WTF of Shellmon's inflatable tube. The dub goes out of its way to give her something else to comment on instead, leaving the tube as an unremarked upon weird visual. Sometimes it feels like they make different choices just for the sake of being different.

The good is that "Paddle like crazy!" is a fantastically flavorful way to translate "Nigero!" pronounced nee-geh-roh, the Japanese verb for fleeing from something. A+

The children paddle for shore as fast as they can, but Shellmon gives chase.

Shellmon: (chasing) LET ME DROWN YOU ALL!!! Agumon: FASTER, HUMANS!!!

The humans do not acquiesce to Shellmon's request, forcing them to swim after them.

Mimi: AHHH!!! THEY'RE CLOSING IN!!!

Shellmon gets close enough to try and bite down on the canoe, but the kids manage to paddle away too quickly for their jaw to hit its mark. Sinking under the water, Shellmon instead picks up speed and smashes through the 'iako connecting the main body of the canoe to its ama.

Shellmon: (exploding up from the water again) THERE'S NO ESCAPE!!! Agumon: We have to push down our fatigue and go save them! Pyokomon: WAIT!!! Mochimon: Let us take care of this.

Mochimon, Pyokomon, Tanemon, and Pukamon volunteer to step in so that Agumon, Gabumon, Tailmon, and Patamon can rest.

The dub, of course, cuts Shellmon directly saying he wants to drown the children.

Shellmon: There's no escaping! You're in my element now! Agumon: Come on, guys! Move it! Tai: (panicked) Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! (Shellmon closes in) Mimi: He's right on top of us! Izzy: Watch out! (Shellmon misses his bite) Mimi: Eugh, that breath. EVER HEAR OF FLOSSING!?!? Tai: (panicked) Stroke! Stroke! Hey, are you guys paddling or am I just talking to myself!? (Shellmon breaks the 'iako and re-emerges) Shellmon: RAAARGH!!! Agumon: We may be exhausted, but we can't just sit here! We've gotta help! Motimon: No! Leave it to us; You save your Digi-strength!

A lot more dialogue in the dub version of this chase, including two separate laugh lines: a Mimi Quip violently stabbed into Shellmon's face and Tai pissing himself while trying to be leaderly. Both of these are great. XD

The four Babies evolve into Tentomon, Piyomon, Palmon, and Gomamon, then throw themselves into the fight. Gomamon swims out towards Shellmon with Piyomon and Tentomon flanking him in the air. Palmon remains on the shore.

Palmon snags Shellmon with her Poison Ivy, jerking his attention away from the humans. Once he stops and focuses on the attackers, she lets go. Piyomon and Tentomon move in, strafing Shellmon from above with alternating shots of Petit Thunder and Magical Fire.

For his part, Gomamon's Marching Fishes surround the canoe. Gomamon takes the back of the canoe, swimming with his fishes and ushering the humans safely away from the battleground.

Peppered by enemy fire, Shellmon withdraws into his shell screaming for help.

Shellmon: For real, HELP ME!!!

Shellmon flees beneath the ocean waves, retreating from the fight and leaving behind the inflatable tube. A bit too overenthusiastic, Piyomon and Tentomon try to chase after him, plunging into the ocean and ending up having to use Shellmon's tube to save themselves.

The dub adds a silence-breaker to the kids' Marching Fishes escape.

Tai: Whoa! That's more like it! This is the way to travel!

Then when Shellmon has to retreat, his line is:

Shellmon: Oh, forget this!

Which isn't nearly as funny as his original line.

With Shellmon defeated, the children and their Digimon partners regroup at the beach.

Taichi: I know everyone's tired, but I do think our Digimon are definitely getting stronger! Hikari: Onii-chan, how do you know that? Taichi: When we fought Shellmon before, we could only win after Agumon evolved into Greymon.

Taichi flashes back on Agumon's first evolution.

I'd be remiss not to point out that this isn't a fair comparison. Agumon was the only one capable of fighting back then because the rest of the team was starving. If Agumon had to solo Shellmon now, he'd probably still have a hard time.

But, to Taichi's point, the Digimon were all recently pummeled by the Dark Masters so it's not like they're in pristine condition now. They still managed to pull it together and chase off Shellmon as a team despite it all.

Taichi: This time, we didn't need Agumon to evolve. Agumon: That's because we worked together as a team! Taichi: But Greymon's power alone should still be greater than everyone's powers put together! Hikari: Maybe Shellmon got weaker? Taichi: No. I'm certain that this means each of our Digimon are getting stronger. Honestly, I've been wondering up to this point what Piccolomon meant earlier....

Flashback to their escape from the Dark Masters.

Taichi: Piccolomon, we made it this way believing that as long as the eight of us were together, we could save both worlds. But-- Piccolomon: It's true that the eight of you are together pi but that alone isn't enough to win pi.

Back in the present, Taichi presents his conclusion.

Taichi: I think he was trying to say that we have to get stronger.

In the dub:

Tai: I know they're all dead tired and they may not feel like it at the moment, but I think today proved that our Digimon are getting stronger and stronger. Kari: That would be great, but what makes you think so? Tai: I remember the last time we took on Shellmon. Agumon had to Digivolve into Greymon before we could finally beat him. And even then, it was close! (Flashback to Greymon absolutely working over Shellmon) Tai: But this time, they beat him easily without Greymon! Agumon: Yeah, but don't forget, Tai: They ganged up on him. It was four of them against one. Tai: But they didn't have to Digivolve as far to do it. I still say it means you're stronger than you were. Kari: Or maybe Shellmon's just weaker than he was. Tai: How come everyone's being such a downer all of a sudden!? I'm trying to be positive here! Besides, I still can't get out of my mind something that Piximon said to me back there. (Flashback to Piximon) Tai: But you said it was possible to save the planet if the eight of us were all together! How come it's not happening, huh? What's up, Piximon!? Piximon: The truth is, being together is not enough. There's something else that you need to do to beat 'em. (Back to present) Tai: I think he meant we had to get stronger! And that's just what's happening!

In light of Taichi's suggestion, the rest of the group discuss with their Partners.

Sora: I think so too! Piyomon: You do? Yamato: You've grown up well. Gabumon: When you put it like that, I feel it too. Tentomon: Koushiro-han, do you think that way about me? Koushiro: Well, bit by bit, maybe. Tentomon: (faceplant) Yaghyagh.... Patamon: Have I matured too? Takeru: Yeah! Of course you have! Tailmon: What about me? Hikari: We only joined the Chosen Children recently, so I think it's too early to tell. Tailmon: (droops) Oh. That's disappointing. Agumon: Don't worry! All of us will get stronger! Tailmon: Yeah, you're right!

Poor Tailmon. But, I mean, to be fair... This is like her third day with Hikari. The others have been with their partners for months.

Don't worry, Tailmon. If it helps, remember that you're a stage above them all so you're technically the strongest one here.

In the dub:

Sora: Yeah, maybe Tai's right. Biyomon: I feel stronger! Matt: Come to think of it, you are looking kind of buff. Gabumon: Thanks very much. That's a compliment, right? Tentomon: Do I look stronger to you, Izzy? Izzy: I don't know, make a muscle. Tentomon: (faceplant) I WAS!!! Patamon: Do I look different, T.K.? T.K.: Yeah, you look buffed out to the max! Gatomon: Kari? Kari: Well, to be honest, you don't look any different to me. But give it time, Gatomon; You'll catch up with the rest. Gatomon: (droops) If you say so.... Agumon: Come to think of it, your coat's looking glossier. Gatomon: Really? You think?

Dub passed up a prime opportunity to have Izzy be a dick in a way that's 100% consistent to the original, but the replacement gag is pretty good too.

I don't like Kari's line. Hikari made the salient point that they're both newcomers so they haven't had time for Tailmon to grow from where she was when Hikari met her. She makes no comparison to the others, but points out that she can't congratulate Tailmon for "growth" when they've barely known each other for long.

Kari, on the other hand, directly compares Gatomon to the rest of the team and calls her abilities inferior. Rather than saying that Gatomon hasn't improved much since they met, she says that Gatomon's fallen behind her peers; That is a completely different sentiment, and one not really supported by what we know of her.

Suddenly, the kids notice the sun shining a little brighter, as the heat begins to distort distant things around them.

Taichi: Huh!? Is that a mirage!?

In the distance, the kids notice a strange hut on the beach, distorted by the heat.

Yamato: There's a beach house! Takeru: Did there used to be a beach house on the coast of File Island? Koushiro: That's not a beach house on the coast of File Island. That's a mirage of a beach house on the coast of File Island. Tentomon: No! That's a real beach house on the coast of File Island!

This is a bit repetitive but it flows better in Japanese. Basically, they're all having fun saying the words "File-tou no kaigan ni" at the start of each sentence, which comes through with a nice rhythmic flow.

Metal Gear Solid alert noise but as a flash mob.

An interesting cultural note about this obvious second trap: In Japanese folklore, mirages are created by the breath of clams. I'm not 100% but to my understanding, mirages bubble up from the sea as images of the great city beneath the ocean, from which the dragon god who rules the sea presides. No one who chases these images ever returns.

We've heard a little about the mythical sea dragon god before. Back at the "Pagumon village", Mimi misremembered a folktale about her favorite character Otohime, daughter of said dragon god. Obviously, here in the Digital World, the sea dragon god is MetalSeadramon.

So. Y'know. Don't trust fucking mirages when you're at war with Otohime's papa. Where this building came from doesn't get explained, but there's a cultural implication that MetalSeadramon manifested it via the mirage.

The dub kicks us off with a silence-breaking quip.

Matt: (sarcastic) Did it get brighter all of a sudden, or is it just Tai's sunny disposition? Tai: ...maybe it's like a mirage.... Matt: Huh!? Was that shack there before? T.K.: Maybe somebody moved in while we were gone? Mimi: Mmm, something smells suspiciously like food! Izzy: Let's take it easy, everyone. Remember, we're in the Digi-World where not everything is what it appears to be. Tentomon: Looks may be deceiving, but smells? That's something else, and I definitely smell grilling hambugers! See? It's a snack bar! Burgers, sodas, ice cream, pizza!

Genuinely surprised that Tai didn't use his line to clap back at Matt.

The File-tou no kaigan ni bit isn't going to translate, so they replace it with discussion of a delicious smell flowing out of the mirage.

Ravenous with hunger and gullible as ever, the children fantasize about all the delicious food that might be in the beach house.

I love the little American flag poking out of the cheeseburger. XD

The mob swarms towards the building.

Taichi: Ramen! Agumon: Curried rice! Takeru: Ice cream! Tentomon: Yakisoba noodles!

They're all in such a hurry that Jou accidentally clips the back of of Mimi's foot, pinning down her boot and forcing her to trip and fall out of it. Mimi faceplants into the beach sand.

Jou picks up Mimi's boot, handing it back to her.

Jou: Ah, I'm sorry! Mimi: Mrrgh.... Gomamon: Oh, come on.... What the heck are you guys doing!? Mimi: They others are going to get all the food if we don't catch up! Jou & Mimi: EHHHH!?!?

Absolutely nobody has stopped for them. The other kids eagerly rush inside the hut.

In the dub:

Tai: Mirage or not, I'll take my chances! GANGWAY!!! Group: (Miscellaneous cheering and hooting) (Joe trips Mimi. He stops to return her boot.) Joe: Sorry, Mimi. Mimi: Oh, thanks. Gomamon: Come on, what are you two waiting for!? Palmon: Yeah, they're going to eat everything without us! Joe: Huh? Mimi: UGH!!!

They cut out the kids yelling out specific food items they want to eat, probably because they already had Tentomon run down the list of American Food Things a moment ago. Otherwise, pretty faithful.

Once (six out of eight) Chosen Children are inside, the trap is sprung. The shack is completely empty, and a sudden sandstorm kicks up and seals the door in sand. Then their assailant reveals himself.

Anomalocarimon: (rising from the sands) ANOMALOCARIMON!!!

Anomalocarimon is a Perfect-stage Data-type Ancient Crustacean Digimon. Their name and design both stem from the ancient anomalocaris. They're the other Data Perfect for the Deep Savers line; Cousin to MegaSeadramon and capable of evolving into MetalSeadramon. Clearly a member of the Deep Savers Ankoku Gundan.

Narrator: Anomalocarimon. An Ancient Crustacean Digimon. By crossing their forelimbs together, they unleash their special attack Stinger Surprise! Anomalocarimon: This isn't your average beach house! This is a death house that will drain away all your energy! Yamato: What!? Anomalocarimon: SUNA SHOWER!!!

Anomalocarimon's Stinger Surprise is entirely in English, but Suna (Sand) Shower mixes English and Japanese.

I'm a little sad that Anomalocarimon didn't say "This isn't some beach house on the coast of File Island! This is a death house on the coast of File Island!"

The death house glows with a bright light that begins draining the kids and their Digimon. Anomalocarimon's Sand shower sprays sand from his mouth, forcing the kids to the ground. Taichi takes Takeru and Hikari in his arms, trying to protect them both as the sand shower forces everyone down.

In the dub, Sora speaks up when they notice the door sealing behind them. Also, the dub refers to this Digimon as Scorpiomon, attempting to pass them off as a scorpion.

Sora: What's that!? It's a trap! (Scorpiomon reveals themselves) Scorpiomon: Whuh-hahaha! Snack time! Patamon: (rundown) It's Scorpiomon! One of MetalSeadramon's flunkies. Between his pinches and his tail, it's hard to know which end of him is worse! Scorpiomon: Sorry, but the only munchies around here are you! Now, say goodnight! It's bedtime! Matt: (challenging) Yeah!? Scorpiomon: Yeah! SCORPION STORM!!! (Scorpiomon sprays down everyone with sand) Sora: ...can't...breathe...can't...eugh....

How would Patamon know who MetalSeadramon's flunkies are? We met him like an hour ago.

The dub misses the exposition that the mirage house drains energy, sort of like what Etemon's Love Serenade would do to them. So they just sort of give up without a fight in that version.

Fortunately, thanks to an overeager mistake, only six of the eight children were caught in this trap. The other two remain outside.

Mimi: Those voices! Jou: Did something happen to the others? Gomamon: Let's go see! Palmon: Yeah!

Mimi and Jou hurry to the beach house with their Partners, where they find the doorway blocked up with sand.

Jou: (gasp) This is-- Gomamon: Shh!

Realizing they're standing on the outer fringe of a trap, the group falls quiet. They sneak around to the side of the house and peek in through the blinds, where they see the rest of their nakama unconscious and covered in sand within.

Comically, all four shriek in horror, then clap hands over each other's mouths and shush each other. Great job, team. Way to flex that one shared brain cell. XD

In the dub:

Mimi: (gasp) Joe: Those sounds never mean anything good! Gomamon: Let's go! (The quartet sprints to the beach house) Mimi: (disappointed) Oh, no! Something tells me this means no chili dogs. (Everyone gasps, then creeps up and spies through the window) Mimi: Oh, wow! What's happened to them? Are they... Could they be.... (Everyone gasps in shock then shushes each other)

Mimi gets two silence-breaker lines added. The first one is an inappropriately-timed Mimi Quip but a pretty fair one, I think. Mimi once got so hangry that it thwarted Devimon's schemes. I can believe that being her kneejerk reaction.

The second one is... Is Mimi implying that she thinks the rest of the team is dead? It feels like that's the implication she left hanging there. Which is super dark yet tonally appropriate. They're alive, but not for lack of trying!

I like these extra lines. ^_^

While Mimi and Jou remain hidden around the side of the house, MetalSeadramon's laughter suddenly cuts through the air. He congratulates his soldier on a job well done.

Jou and Mimi eavesdrop on MetalSeadramon's meeting with Anomalocarimon.

MetalSeadramon: Ahahaha! Great work, Anomalocarimon! I expect no less from a member of my Deep Savers Ankoku Gundan. Here is your payment.

MetalSeadramon rewards Anomalocarimon with a shower of tasty clams to eat.

Are these the same clams whose breath created the beach house mirage? Or different ones? No idea. But it's a boon that Anomalocarimon is thrilled to receive.

Anomalocarimon: YIPPEE!!! ANOMALOCARIMOOOOON!!!

Anomalocarimon digs into the clams, eating one after another and tossing the shells. One shell bops Gomamon on the head.

Gomamon: Augh! Palmon: Shhh! MetalSeadramon: Huh?

The towering sea dragon turns his head to the tree line, following that unexpected sound. Palmon grabs Gomamon and presses herself against a tree, while Jou and Mimi lay flat against the ground. After a moment MetalSeadramon stops caring and leaves for the beach house.

MetalSeadramon: Mm. Time for annihilation.

In the dub:

MetalSeadramon: Hehehe haha.... Well done, Scorpiomon. These DigiDestined are not so difficult to handle after all! Here's your reward. (Clam shower) Scorpiomon: OOOOH, CLAMS!!! Thank you! Thank you, boss! I just love clams! I just can't get enough of them! (A discarded clamshell bops Gomamon) Gomamon: Ow... Palmon: Shhh! MetalSeadramon: WHAT WAS THAT!?!? Scorpiomon: What is it, boss? You want some? MetalSeadramon: QUIET!!! I thought I heard something. (The DigiDestined pass their stealth check) Scorpiomon: I didn't hear anything. MetalSeadramon: Hmph. (heads out) Well, now to finish them off.

More silence-breakers added to break up the tense moment where MetalSeadramon nearly catches them. This one's a mixed bag; We lose that tension and suspense, but gain a fun little exchange between dipshit minion and his superior.

As MetalSeadramon approaches the beach house, he finds the door blocked off and realizes he'll need a clever way of getting inside-- No, I'm kidding, he moves through it like butter.

MetalSeadramon looks over the captured children for a moment, then withdraws his head from the shack.

MetalSeadramon: ...there are eight Chosen Children. Two of them aren't here.

Another carelessly discarded clamshell strikes MetalSeadramon on the snout, bouncing harmlessly off his invulnerable plating.

MetalSeadramon: And you're just stuffing your face!? Anomalocarimon: (nervous) Ehh...? MetalSeadramon: Hurry up and go find the remaining Chosen Children! Anomalocarimon: A-a-a-a-ANOMALOCARIMOOOON!!! (scurries off)

Realizing he's after them, Jou and Mimi shriek one last time, this time giving their positions away. Abandoning stealth, they flee across the beach.

Anomalocarimon: (aggressive) ANOMALOCARIMON!!!

The dub has some more extra dialogue for MetalSeadramon.

MetalSeadramon: (breaking through the house) Hehehehe! Eight little gnats and their Digimon accomplices. ...hmm.... (MetalSeadramon withdraws his head) MetalSeadramon: What's this!? There's supposed to be eight of them! Two of them are missing! (Clamshell bop) MetalSeadramon: YOU CHUCKLE-HEADED COCKLESHELL!!! Stop eating and find the other two NOW!!! Scorpiomon: Oh, you got it! Right away! I'm on it! (scurries off) (Scorpiomon chases down Jou and Mimi) Scorpiomon: Come back here! (wheeze wheeze) Oh, I hate it when they do this. Hey! Slow down! (gets closer) Aha! I gotcha now!

MetalSeadramon calls Scorpiomon a "cockleshell" with all the energy of telling someone in elementary school to "Kiss my ass-phalt". XD

Neither Jou nor Mimi being especially athletic, Anomalocarimon gains ground quickly. We go to commercial break and come back to Jou and Mimi's legs giving out. They fall into the sand, gasping for breath.

This would be opportune for Anomalocarimon, but they too run out of strength and collapse into the sand, gasping for breath.

Anomalocarimon: ...they're so fast....

Something about this situation motives the kids to get their second wind more quickly than their pursuer, and they get back up and bolt. Anomalocarimon forces themself to resume the chase, ultimately thwarted when the kids take cover behind a rock.

Look, anomalocaris was an aquatic predator. Their biology is not suited to running. You might as well ask a dolphin to chase down a chimpanzee in a land race.

The dub makes this even more pathetic for Scorpiomon.

Scorpiomon: (collapses) ...too many clams for lunch.... (Joe and Mimi get up and run) Scorpiomon: Oh no! Not again! Come on! COME ON!!! ...I'm not built for this. Gomamon: This way! THIS WAY!!!

XD Oh man, I am loving the dub's take on Scorpiomon. He's such a weenie. I adore the line "I'm not built for this" because in addition a weenie whine, it's factually correct. He's actually not!

What the hell is MetalSeadramon doing? Is he kicking back and watching Anomalocarimon flail? Taking notes for Anomalocarimon's next performance review? Dark Master MetalSeadramon coiled up in the sand watching both groups faint into the sand and sit there for however long, going, "...really?"

Meanwhile, six vulnerable Chosen Children are going unannihilated because MetalSeadramon is letting the perfect be the enemy of the good. If he can't kill all eight then he's not going to touch a single one!

Finally giving up on the foot chase, Anomalocarimon decides on a new approach. While the children take cover behind the rock, Anomalocarimon burrows into the ground.

Mimi, Jou, and their Partners catch their breath behind the safety of the rock.

Palmon: No more.... Jou: We have to fight.... Gomamon: You're right....

While Mimi and Palmon remain behind the rock, Jou and Gomamon emerge to confront Anomalocarimon. All they find is the hole left in the ground where they burrowed.

Mimi: What's wrong? Jou: Anomalocarimon is... gone.... Gomamon: They ran away! Mimi: (emerges) They could be hiding.... Palmon: If only we could evolve.... Gomamon: Yeah, but we're tired and starving so-- Oh! We can just scrounge for something!

The Digimon have gotten used to the human world, where food comes out of the refrigerator. That's only occasionally true on File Island.

Gomamon quickly digs up a pair of clams, while Palmon pulls some seaweed out of the ocean.

Gomamon: Looks tasty! Palmon: Found this!

Gomamon and Palmon eagerly fill their stomachs and restore their stamina.

In the dub, Scorpiomon remains hilariously pitiful.

Scorpiomon: Oh, forget it! (burrows) Joe: I can't... run anymore... we'll just have to... stand and fight.... Gomamon: Right! (Joe and Gomamon emerge) Gomamon: Huh? We may not have to.... Mimi: What happened? Joe: I don't know, but he's gone! Gomamon: Haha! What a lucky break! Mimi: Lucky for us, he doesn't work out. Palmon: Ugh, I'm getting my exercise right now. My roots are exhausted. Gomamon: And I am so hungry I could just about eat seaweed. Hey, wait! Lookit! (Gomamon and Palmon scrounge up food)

The lines at Scorpiomon's expense are great. Good casual dialogue.

The dub's take on the food search doesn't click, though. This is kind of an important moment, as we see the Digimon reacquaint themselves with scavenging the Digital World for food after being in the human world for a while.

The problem is posed: We can't evolve because we're hungry. Then the Digimon remember how to solve that problem their way, rather than being led astray by easy answers like the illusory beach house, which have so often been too good to be true.

This doesn't come across in the dub, where the vibe is simply, "Oh I'm hungry; Let's eat." We don't get to see the transformation of their way of thinking from human world comfort back to Digital World survivalism.

Down beneath the waves, Anomalocarimon notices one of Gomamon's carelessly discarded clamshells sinking beneath the water. Surprised, they poke their head back up to see what's up.

The other clamshell bops Anomalocarimon right in the joystick antennae thing that is not their eye but can easily be mistaken for it.

Anomalocarimon: Ow! ANOMALOCARIMON!!!

Anomalocarimon surges out of the ocean to attack Jou and Mimi. Evolving to protect them, Togemon and Ikkakumon counterattack, but to little effect. Anomalocarimon's stingers block Togemon's Chiku-Chiku Bang-Bang. Ikkakumon lands three direct hits of Harpoon Vulcan, but Anomalocarimon tanks all three missiles and remains unscathed.

In the dub, Scorpiomon mistakes Gomamon's meal for the clams he was paid earlier.

Gomamon: Not bad! Scorpiomon: Huh? GET YOUR MITTS OFF MY CLAMS!!!

While Togemon and Ikkakumon fight Anomalocarimon, Jou and Mimi put Taichi's earlier theory to the test.

It does not go well.

Jou: Since Togemon and Ikkakumon have grown, they shouldn't lose this.... Mimi: And since it's two against one, we should have up the upper hand!

Anomalocarimon proceeds to beat their Digimon like a drum. They swipe Ikkakumon away with their tail, then pick up Togemon and squeeze her between their two stingers, crushing her.

Togemon: IT HURTS!!! HELP ME!!!

Then they slam Togemon down on top of Ikkakumon for good measure.

Jou: (disappointed) ...they're losing. Mimi: It's too dangerous to keep this up! We'll be killed! Jou: Maybe they'd win if they evolve again!

Probably, yes. But it nonetheless makes for a solid counterargument against Taichi's theory.

In the dub:

Joe: If the Digimon really are getting stronger, they should be able to handle Scorpiomon, no problem! Mimi: I hope so, but it doesn't really look like they're doing too well! (Scorpiomon swats Ikakkumon, then picks up Togemon) Togemon: HEY, PUT ME DOWN YOU OVERGROWN CRAWDADDY BEFORE I GET REALLY ANGRY!!! (Scorpiomon smacks Ikkakumon with Togemon) Joe: Oh, boy. Mimi: WHY DON'T YOU COME OUT FROM BEHIND YOUR SHELL AND FIGHT LIKE A CLAM!?!? Joe: Uh, Mimi? Cool it! I don't think he thought that was very funny!

Mimi challenges Scorpiomon to a fistfight.

Bad. Ass.

And also tremendously inconsistent to both versions of her character. Mimi knows better. Her father doesn't know better, but Mimi knows better.

But badass.

Anomalocarimon tries to spray Mimi and Jou down with their Suna Shower, but the kids take cover behind the rocks again.

Anomalocarimon moves to follow. Ikkakumon and Togemon sprint up behind them.

Ikkakumon: HANG ON!!! We're the ones you're fighting!

Anomalocarimon responds with their signature Stinger Surprise. Ikkakumon and Togemon clear out before the shot hits. The explosion tears open the sand, revealing a treasure trove of tasty clams.

The dub gives Ikkakumon's line over to Togemon.

Togemon: Hey, squid breath! We're the ones you want!

They also change Scorpiomon's attack to Tail Blade, despite not involving his tail in any way.

Anomalocarimon is immediately distracted by all those tasty, tasty clams.

Anomalocarimon: Hey, this looks delicious! Jou: NOW, IKKAKUMON!!! Mimi: SUPER-EVOLVE, TOGEMON!!!

Their Digimon super-evolve into Zudomon and Lilimon. Followed by a hilariously dopey shot where a still image of Lilimon slowly flies in front of Jou and Mimi for no apparent reason.

In the dub:

Scorpiomon: Ooh! I just love clams! Joe: Hurry up! Now's your chance! Mimi: Get moving! Digivolve, Togemon!

Once they've Digivolved again, the dub gives Dopey Shot Lillymon a silence-breaker to at least lend some purpose to that moment.

Lillymon: Okay, Zudomon, let's GOOOOOOO!!!

And go, they do.

Zudomon pulls aggro, drawing Anomalocarimon's fire. Tucking down into a defensive position, Zudomon's hard shell tanks Anomalocarimon's Stinger Surprise.

While the enemy is distracted, Lilimon blindsides them with Flower Cannon. The shot seems to do little damage but pulls Anomalocarimon's attention away from Zudomon; A fatal mistake. Zudomon closes distance, calling Hammer Spark and slamming his Thor Hammer down directly between Anomalocarimon's antennae.

With a pitiful whimper, Anomalocarimon falls over on their back, defeated.

Inside the beach house, the children and their Digimon are starting to stir. MetalSeadramon's window of opportunity is closing.

Taichi: Hikari....

Outside, MetalSeadramon looms over the beach house, complaining about his tardy soldier.

MetalSeadramon: They're late. Anomalocarimon is late! What could they possibly be doing?

Meanwhile, Mimi and Jou ride Zudomon back towards the beach house. Lilimon flies nearby, while Zudomon drags Anomalocarimon's unconscious body along with them.

Jou: Faster, Zudomon! We have to hurry and save everyone!

In the dub:

Tai: Ugh... Kari.... (Outside) MetalSeadramon: Where is that fool with those other children!? I'm tired of waiting! (Zudomon on his way) Joe: Hurry! Faster! We gotta move, now! Did you really have to bring along a souvenir!?

Joe eases the tension by throwing down one of the funniest laugh lines in the dub thus far. Holy shit, that got me. XD

It hasn't been established what Zudomon intends to do with the unconscious Anomalocarimon, so Joe calling him out for that ambiguity lands hard. But it's also a joke that meshes and integrates with the tone, rather than disrupting it. A+

At the beach house, MetalSeadramon's decided that he's done waiting.

MetalSeadramon: I don't care about the other two Chosen Children anymore.

MetalSeadramon breathes fire into the air, intending to set the whole beach house ablaze. Jou, Mimi, and their Partners take cover behind the tree line.

Mimi: MetalSeadramon is planning to burn down the beach house with everyone inside! Lilimon: Come on! Hurry!

Lilimon, Mimi, and Jou race inside the beach house through a... somewhat unexplained hole in the beach house wall. Is that supposed to be the hole MetalSeadramon smashed earlier? Did he nervously pace around to the other side of the beach house afterwards? It sure looks a lot bigger than his head.

Lilimon goes for Taichi, while Mimi makes a beeline for Sora.

Lilimon: Taichi, pull yourself together. Taichi: Lilimon? Mimi: SORA-SAN!!! Jou: Yamato! Koushiro! Lilimon: (flies over the Digimon) Quickly, everyone! Tentomon: Huh, what's going on?

Out front, MetalSeadramon's finished testing his firebreath. He turns his gaze down on the house.

MetalSeadramon: FIRE!!!

He lets it rip, his flames engulfing the house in seconds.

In the dub:

MetalSeadramon: That does it! I'll worry about the other two children later. Mimi: Yikes! And I thought Shellmon's breath was gnarly! He'll toast them like marshmallows! Lillymon: This way! Hurry! Joe: HEY GUYS!!! NAPTIME'S OVER!!!

Joe yells at the top of his lungs while they're passing directly under MetalSeadramon's nose. Somehow, this doesn't give the game away.

Mimi's quip here is a little tonally inappropriate, but I do like the callback to her earlier barb at Shellmon. Mimi's getting a lot of fun lines in this episode.

Lillymon: Tai, you've gotta get out of here! Tai: Huh...? Mimi: Sora, get up! Joe: Matt! Izzy! Move or you're gonna be toast! I mean literally! Lillymon: (flies over the Digimon) Everybody on your feet! Hurry! Tentomon: W-What's going on!? (Outside, MetalSeadramon takes aim) MetalSeadramon: RRRRYAAAAAGH!!! (fires)

MetalSeadramon does not shout "Fire" when he shoots his fire. 0/10 Go to pun jail. For, uh, insufficient punning. For once.

As the beach house goes up in flames, the kids vacate through the big maybe-unexplained hole.

Taichi again takes responsibility for Takeru and Hikari, ushering them out of the building.

Taichi: Hikari! Takeru! Are you okay!? Hikari: Yeah....

Zudomon replaces the children with the unconscious Anomalocarimon. While the kids evacuate, he stands nearby. His shoulders vibrate to indicate that he is silently laughing hysterically to himself. Epic prank, bro.

MetalSeadramon: SIX OF THE CHOSEN CHILDREN AND THEIR DIGIMON ARE DEAD!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Anomalocarimon: (inside, wakes up on fire) EEEYAAAGH ATATAT!!! MetalSeadramon: ...uh?

Anomalocarimon explodes through the sand blocking the door, scurrying across the stand in flames. MetalSeadramon watches them go by in confused silence.

Anomalocarimon: HOT HOT HOT ANOMALOCARIMOOOOON!!!

Finally, when they reach the coastline, Anomalocarimon throws themself into the ocean to douse the flames.

In the dub:

Tai: Whoa! Hang on and keep moving; We're almost there! Mimi: Hurry up and let's get out of here! (Outside) MetalSeadramon: Ha! Farewell, DigiDestined! It was a rare pleasure knowing you! MEDIUM RARE!!! GYAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Scorpiomon: (inside, wakes up on fire) WHAAAAUGH HOT HOT HOT!!! MetalSeadramon: ...huh? (Scorpiomon explodes through the sand barrier and scurries for dear life) Scorpiomon: OW!!! Who's the hot-tempered foul-mouth who--Oh, it was you, boss. Okay. No problem.

MetalSeadramon's "medium rare" quip is great. XD This episode is bringing all the best laugh lines.

I do prefer the original version of Scorpiomon's fiery exit. The dub's sycophantic joke is pretty good too. Both versions put comedic focus in different places, with Scorpiomon's bit emphasizing what a tool he is.

The original, meanwhile, emphasizes MetalSeadramon. He's positioned in center frame so we can watch his head turn and follow Anomalocarimon. The emphasis is on his stunned WTF reaction. Reality is gaslighting him and he is at a loss for words.

Both work on their own, but I like the original better.

Once Anomalocarimon is doused in the ocean, MetalSeadramon finally finds the presence of mind to make sense of what's happened.

MetalSeadramon: The six Chosen Children and their Digimon are gone! Anomalocarimon, what is the meaning of this!? Anomalocarimon: MetalSeadramon-sama, uh... You see....

Unfortunately for him, Anomalocarimon has no better idea of what happened than MetalSeadramon does. They were unconscious the whole time.

MetalSeadramon furiously wraps his tail around Anomalocarimon, hoisting them high up into the air.

MetalSeadramon: SILENCE!!!

MetalSeadramon drops them from a great height, finishing them off. We don't see Anomalocarimon disintegrate into pixels, but they crash into the earth and kick up a huge sandstorm on impact, then are gone afterward - Leaving behind only a large imprint in the sand where they fell. The implication is fairly clear.

RIP Anomalocarimon. Recipient of a prank so epic it got them killed.

In the dub:

MetalSeadramon: Huh? No! NO!!! THEY'RE GONE!!! ALL OF THEM GONE!!! SCORPIOMOOOOOON!!! HOW DID THIS HAPPEN!?!? Scorpiomon: Uh, w-well, you see... That's a fair question... You see, it happens-- MetalSeadramon: SILENCE!!! (grapples Scorpiomon into the sky) You failed me and I will not forgive FAILURE!!! Scorpiomon: No, I didn't think that you w-OOOOULD!!! (dropped)

Scorpiomon remains a weenie to the end. XD

You know, I kind of expected them to add a line or two indicating that Scorpiomon survived that drop but I guess we're over that. A guy got stabbed in the chest last episode; This is going to be a hard arc to try and hand-wring about character death.

Once MetalSeadramon's gone, the kids emerge and discuss what Jou and Mimi learned.

Lilimon: MetalSeadramon seems to have left. Taichi: Everything's alright now. Mimi: Everything's not alright, actually. Taichi: Huh!? Jou: She's right. Taichi: What do you mean? What happened? Jou: Ikkakumon and Togemon weren't strong enough to defeat Anomalocarimon. They could only win after evolving into Zudomon and Lilimon. Our chances against MetalSeadramon still aren't very good right now. Taichi: So it's just like Piccolomon said. Even with the eight of us together, it's not enough to win. Could it be that the Digimon's evolutions still need improvement?

It was pretty foolish to assume we'd already done whatever Piccolomon thought we still needed to do. There's a long road ahead.

In the dub:

Sora: They're gone! Whew! That was a close one. Tai: But we came out of it okay. That's what counts. Mimi: I hate to tell you this: Everything's not okay! Tai: Huh!? Joe: Mimi's right. Tai: What are you guys talking about!? Did I miss something!? Joe: The Digimon still might not be strong enough. Both of ours had to Digivolve again before they could beat Scorpiomon and he was just a flunkie. Frankly, it's hard to see how they stand a chance against a fully Digivolved monster like MetalSeadramon. Tai: You could be right. Maybe Piximon meant something else when he said we were missing something. Whatever the secret is, we've got to find it if we ever hope to save the world.

Pretty faithful. We also see the return of the phrase "fully Digivolved" now in its new, more correct context. There are still technically Digimon beyond the Ultimate stage but those are basically one-off super-exceptions, not a whole category. When pressed, they often wind up classifying as... like... Ultimate but even more Ultimate-er.

It's pretty safe to call this stage "fully Digivolved".

Suddenly, Tentomon takes off into the air to get a better vantage.

Tentomon: What's that!?

Unfortunately, we will not get the moment to breathe that we thought we were getting. MetalSeadramon only fucked off to stage yet another ambush. Utterly relentless.

Taichi: METALSEADRAMON!!! Lilimon: I'll hold him here! The rest of you, escape on Zudomon's back! Mimi: LILIMON!?!?

Initially, MetalSeadramon takes the bait. Without another word, Lilimon flies out to meet him head-on, then flitters around him and takes off. MetalSeadramon gives chase while Zudomon ferries the children away.

It doesn't take him long to realize the ruse, however. MetalSeadramon abandons Lilimon when he notices Zudomon escaping.

MetalSeadramon: You're all idiots! You think you can escape from me BY SEA!?!?

MetalSeadramon pursues Zudomon, quickly closing distance.

Tentomon: WAUGH!!! METALSEADRAMON IS GAINING ON US!!! Taichi: Faster! Get us out of here, Zudomon! MetalSeadramon: NO CHANCE!!!

Lilimon follows behind MetalSeadramon. In one last desperate bid to pull his attention, she fires off her Flower Cannon. MetalSeadramon's Chrome Digizoid neck plating deflects her shot harmlessly.

MetalSeadramon turns, offering Lilimon only one more moment of his time. Lifting his tail out of the water behind her, he swats her out of the air for an instant KO.

Mimi: LILIMON!!!

Lilimon powers down into Palmon as she falls, tumbling into Mimi's arms.

Mimi: (catch) Palmon!

In the dub, Tentomon doesn't see anything; He reacts to Tai wanting to find the thing they're missing.

Tentomon: Yeah, so the sooner, the better! (MetalSeadramon emerges from the waves) Tai: It's MetalSeadramon again!

The dub puts a commercial break here. Good place for it. Solid cliffhanger. Then they add some extra dialogue to the chase sequence.

Lillymon: Alright, I'll draw him off! Zudomon, you get the others out of here. (Lillymon flies out to confront MetalSeadramon) Lillymon: Yoo-hoo, you big ugly--WHOA! (Lillymon swerves and changes course) Lillymon: Just my luck! He's fast too! (Zudomon tries to escape) Joe: Come on, Zudomon! Move it! Move it! (MetalSeadramon chases Lillymon, but then stops and notices Zudomon escaping) Mimi: Has he seen us? Tai: I don't know, and I don't want to find out! MetalSeadramon: Pathetic little fools! You think you can escape me BY SEA!?!? Tai: I think it's safe to say he's seen us! Tentomon: WAUGH!!! FASTER, ZUDOMON!!! WE NEED SPEED!!! Tai: Yeah, stop dog-paddling! MetalSeadramon: TONIGHT YOU SLEEP WITH THE FISHES!!!

Taichi's quip didn't land for me, but MetalSeadramon's did. Goddammit. XD

Glad they kept the "You think you can escape me by sea!?" bit.

Once Lilimon's out of the fight, MetalSeadramon turns his full attention to Zudomon. He sinks down beneath the waves, vanishing into the murky water.

The children are left in silent anticipation, watching the ocean waves to try and find where MetalSeadramon will emerge. Then, suddenly, his horn breaches the water.

Taichi: Here he comes! Jou: Zudomon!

MetalSeadramon charges at full speed, ramming Zudomon's side and sending the kids on his back tumbling into the ocean. While the kids flounder in the water, Zudomon turns and headbutts MetalSeadramon's serpentine body, knocking him back a bit.

MetalSeadramon follows up with Ultimate Stream, firing straight into the hard shell on Zudomon's back. Zudomon's shell offers no protection from MetalSeadramon's signature move. The shot obliterates what strength Zudomon had left, knocking him back and degenerating him into Gomamon.

Gomamon comically lands on Jou's face, pushing them both underwater.

Jou: AUGH GOMAMON Ablrblurbb.... MetalSeadramon: WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Even MetalSeadramon thought it was funny.

The dub, of course, gives the kids some dialogue while they wait for MetalSeadramon.

Tai: Uh-oh. Joe: Is he gone? Mimi: I don't think so! Sora: I can't stand this waiting! Matt: I bet he's right below us! Tai: Shh! Knock it off! (MetalSeadramon emerges on a collision course) Tai: WHOA!!! HE'S RAMMING US!!! Agumon: Hang on! (MetalSeadramon rams Zudomon. They fight; MetalSeadramon obliterates Zudomon.) MetalSeadramon: Never send a Rookie to do a Mega's work! Narrator: Stuck in the middle of the ocean, the DigiDestined are at MetalSeadramon's mercy. What will happen on the next Digimon: Digital Monsters?

Uh, you sent an Ultimate to do a Mega's work earlier, but I get the sentiment.

The dub ends the episode here, presumably to make up screentime they had to spend on the end of last episode. But there's one more scene to go. A great shadow passes beneath the Chosen Children.

MetalSeadramon: Huh? Taichi: WHAMON!!!

Whamon explodes from the water, throwing themself full-speed into MetalSeadramon and body slamming them into the ocean. Then, before MetalSeadramon, Whamon scoops the children up in their mouth.

Taichi: WE'RE SAVED!!! WHAMON WILL PROTECT US WITH HIS BODY!!!

MetalSeadramon recovers in time to catch Whamon's departure. Whamon swims deep into the ocean, escaping from the Dark Master.

MetalSeadramon: Chosen Children and your Digimon.... YOU WILL NOT ESCAPE!!!

The Japanese version leaves off there, on a promise of pursuit by a furious and relentless sea dragon.

Assessment: MetalSeadramon is my favorite of the Dark Masters. There's something about a sinister sea dragon that's so unlike everything else they've fought before. The same can be said of Mugendramon and Pinochimon too, but MetalSeadramon also has that unique aquatic aesthetic going for him.

This episode serves as our proper introduction for the kind of villain MetalSeadramon is: A relentless pursuer hammering the children with an unyielding onslaught of attacks. He's basically doing what Etemon was trying to do, and it's working. He's had them on the backfoot for the entire episode, despite some setbacks.

When he screams "You won't escape" at them at the end, I believe it.

The dub made some questionable choices at the start of this one. Cohesive storytelling is, as usual, their weak point. But their quipping game was superb. Once the action started, the dub was nailing zingers left and right

And since a large chunk of this episode was action, the dub came home with a lot more W's than L's this time around despite its bizarre narrative choices.

[zodiactalks]

This is What Makes Each Zodiac Sign Scary

We all have a dark side.

We may not be aware of it, regarding it as just another aspect of our personality, but the truth is that our dark sides can come off as disturbing, even scary to others.

We may be too explosive, we may be too good at lying, or we may be a little too much into true crime shows.

Regardless of what it is, we all have something that makes us scary to others.

#1. Aries

Aries can come off as scary because of their unpredictable temper and how it can come seemingly out of nowhere; One moment, Aries is sunny and happy, the other they're exploding and taking everyone in their vicinity with them.

Arieses have no problem with confrontation either, and when angry, they'll have no qualms about saying hurtful things or even getting physical.

They might regret their actions later, but an angry Aries is a scary sight indeed.

#2. Taurus

The fact that Taurus is stubborn isn't new information, but what makes them scary is just how stubborn they can be, and how far they're willing to take things in order to get their way.

Tauruses are the kind of people who will willingly suffer if it means having the final word. The type of person who, once convinced of their righteousness, will dig their heels in even if it harms them or others.

Taurus's stubbornness can lead them to self-destructive actions, and it's always scary (and frustrating) to try and deal with that kind of fanaticism.

#3. Gemini

What makes Gemini scary is their innate ability for lying.

People tend to attribute this to their duality, and some believe Geminis are naturally two-faced, but that's a little unfair on Geminis.

Geminis don't particularly enjoy lying. They just happen to be naturals at it.

Geminis are scary because it's hard to take them at face value. They might be honest; they may be lying: Chances are they're not sure of it themselves.

#4. Cancer

Cancers can be somewhat insecure and intense in their emotions.

While this doesn't make them scary, the clinginess that comes from that combination can scare more than one person.

Cancers don't intend to be suffocating, and they'd rather not come off as too attached, but it tends to happen regardless; The more their loved ones want to get away, the harder Cancer clings, and that can lead to all kinds of conflict.

You know that crazy ex of yours? There's a good chance they were a Cancer, and they probably weren't meant to come off as crazy. Their clinginess got the best of them.

#5. Leo

Are drama queens scary? They can be!

Leo's dramatic tendencies on their own aren't scary. Their willingness to take the drama to the next level is.

Leos can blow even the smallest thing entirely out of proportion, and while it can be funny on low doses, it gets really old, really fast.

Appeals to logic don't tend to work either: The only one capable of calming Leo down is Leo, and when Leo is on a roll, Leo isn't calming anyone.

Okay, so "scarry" is probably not the best word to describe this aspect of their personality, but no matter what word you use, it can definitely scare people away.

#6. Virgo

Known perfectionists, Virgos are scary when they direct their ridiculously high expectations to others.

They're merciless on their criticism. They'll search for flaws, however small, and bring them up at every chance they get, appearing overtly critical and intimidating.

People don't enjoy being judged, particularly when they're being judged on unspecified and arbitrary things only Virgo knows about.

#7. Libras

What makes Libras scary is how hard they hold on to grudges.

Yes, they can be charismatic, kind, and downright charming, but they're also capable of listing everyone that had ever wronged them, even if it happened when they were in kindergarten.

As compassionate and kind as Libras can be, those are emotions they reserve for people who are on their good side.

Those who are on their wrong side can expect to be there for life.

#8. Scorpio.

We all know that Scorpios tend to hold grudges, enjoy getting revenge, and have a mean-streak they don't even try to hide.

That alone can make them scary, but what makes them really scary is their fascination with true crime.

Yes, true crime shows and movies are always popular. We're all a little obsessed with them, but it's one thing when, say Pisces like them, and another one when Scorpio gets into those shows.

For all we know, they might be taking notes!

#9. Sagittarius

What makes Sagittarius scary is just how inconsistent they can be. You never know where you're standing with them, and you never know what they're going to do.

One moment, they treat you like you're the most important person in the world. The other, it seems like they forget you even exist.

#10. Capricorn

Capricorns can be incredibly emotionally detached, and this makes them downright terrifying.

One thing is to keep their emotions under control, another is to act like the terminator, and Capricorns tend to do the latter more often than not.

Their focus on self-control can get them to shut down their emotions entirely, and that can be very off-putting to others, particularly for those who express their love freely and assume Capricorn is angry at them.

#11. Aquarius

Aquarians can be scary because they love to be contrary.

They enjoy arguing about things they don't even care about, they like stirring things up without any thought of consequences, and they can't get enough of making others get angry and lose their cools.

In other words, Aquarians are gigantic trolls, and while it can be amusing when it happens to others, having that kind of wanton destruction directed at you is always unnerving.

#12. Pisces

What makes Pisces scary is their negativity, or rather how far they can take it.

A bad day or an unfavorable experience can send them spiraling down a very negative path. While they're not likely to take that out on others, it's always scary to see Pisces go from bad to worse, with seemingly no ability to get away from their negative emotions.

[cyb-by-lang]

I kinda already commented and it felt weird to do it again? So I thought I’d ask here instead:

I just saw a post on tumblr that Batman did try to kill Joker and Superman stopped him??? And it was because Joker was somehow linked with Iran, and couldn’t be killed cuz it would start a war. And other Batkids also tried to kill Joker???

I’ve honestly always thought Batman didn’t kill Joker cuz he’s too popular a villain so it was just sort of waved off because of ‘Batman rules’ and publication reasons.

Is Batman almost killing Joker included in your fic? I have very little knowledge of the comics and hearing about newer versions overwriting previous stories makes me even more confused.

Congrats to you for having unlocked a secret level of rambling through deciding to send an ask rather than a comment. This would totally have ended up on AO3 below your comment. :p

And it is going below the cut because it's long as hell.

The scenario you've heard about was from the original run of A Death in the Family, which is the story arc where Jason was killed back in the 80s. In the aftermath of Bruce finding Jason dead (and Jason's birth mother dying shortly thereafter), he hunts for the Joker after realizing that the warehouse explosion didn't, in fact, kill the clown. Somehow (racism!) the Joker ends up being appointed as the Iranian ambassador to the UN. This was later retconned to the fictional country of Qurac, because even DC realized that was a step too far. In the scene after that fun little reveal, Superman is on hand to try and keep shenanigans to a minimum, the Joker predictably tries to gas the entire UN assembly chamber anyway, and then flees via helicopter. Batman, who has been trailing along this entire time in a rage, pursues.

He's planning to kill the clown. Superman, for reasons related to "we don't whack ambassadors and start wars," has been holding him back for the arc thus far. Helicopter pursuit turns into a helicopter fight, during which the Joker's henchman fires a spray of bullets that kills the pilot while everyone is on board and having a bad time. Batman exits the aircraft alive, intact, and furious, and doesn't give a single shit if the Joker died when the chopper hit the sea.

And then a month later the fucking clown comes back again like nothing happened. Only the entire setting has undergone a serious tone shift since Jason's death, which means you're gonna see a lot heavier, dramatic stories that have more significant body counts. Batman cannot get over the death of his son, because no, and eventually Tim Drake pops up in the middle of that death spiral with a hypothesis: "Batman needs a Robin."

He's not wrong.

He also doesn't go about it super gracefully, including an attempt to convince Dick to come back to the Robin mantle that goes nowhere, but eventually he convinces the Dark Knight to take on a third Robin. Unlike Dick and Jason, Tim is locked the fuck down for training and not allowed out in the field willy-nilly. And when he does go out, he is ferociously competent.

Incidentally, this is because the writers/editors realized that after the child murder storyline they'd just done, Batman had to have one hell of a reason to ever take on another kid sidekick. And they needed to try and drag the Robin role's popularity back up, since killing a kid sidekick was also a symptom of DC's tanking sales at the time; the whole thing was ultimately a publicity stunt. It was a bad idea and now we just live with it.

So Tim is, broadly, never portrayed as incompetent in any aspect aside from maybe high school socializing. I don't think he gets kidnapped even a tenth of the number of times Dick did during his decades-long career as Robin. Certainly never falls for a honey trap plot or anything like that.

But yeah, the meta reason why the Joker never dies is because he's an iconic villain who drives plots. But unless you step out of the main continuity, he's also never just been a "no-frills funny" villain since.

ANYWAY.

As far as the rest of the Batfam taking a swing at the Joker, there's one incident that I can recall off the top of my head.

Dick Grayson, currently Nightwing, wasn't especially close to Jason while he was alive. During Jason's original run, they had a cordial (if brief) relationship, but they basically didn't get any storylines together, so it's hard to really tell how strongly they bonded. After Jason died, Dick began experiencing...I wanna call them chronic night terrors. The idea is that a boy in a Robin costume is falling, and falling, and Dick can never save the kid.

I'm sure it has nothing whatsoever to do with his dead brother, no sir.

So, some time later, the Joker gets told he has terminal cancer by a psychiatrist who assumes that if the clown was convinced he was going to die, he might try reforming or something. A terminal turnaround. Lots of people do that, right?

He assumed wrong.

The Joker goes on an utter tear, doing all sorts of escalating villainy that starts with gassing everyone he can get his hands on, including other Arkham inmates. Somewhere amid this rampage, Robin III goes missing and the Joker cheerfully tells Nightwing that yeah, he killed the kid. And he has the gall to bring up Jason in the middle of all the gloating. By name. (The Joker knows Jason's name due to some nonsense involving Crane and Fear Toxin hallucinations and Batman in a prior story arc.)

And Dick

fucking

SNAPS.

Pummels the Joker right there on the floor. Barehanded. No sticks, no pausing, just beats him to death.

Two seconds later, a very alive (if hurt) Tim manages to get there and go "oh god what happened." Because Dick is not doing well! He has a crisis about killing a dude, no matter how terrible. He never thought he'd go that far.

Batman swoops in and resuscitates the clown. In the time between Jason's death and The Joker's Last Laugh, he has apparently decided that it's more important to keep Dick from suffering a breakdown than it is to kill the clown. DC editorial was gonna keep him alive either way, but whatever.

And now for the third part of my ramble.

As for Under the Red Hood, Jason's death is seriously streamlined for the film. In this version of events, none of the UN chicanery happens. Ra's al Ghul hires the clown for a distraction job while trying to crash the world economy (again) and whoops, the clown killed Batman's son. Crowbar, bomb, whatever. Before Jason's body can be buried, the League of Assassins steals it, hucks Jason into the Lazarus Pit, and now he's alive again!

Except, given how he died and how long he spent dead and how that interacts with the magic, he wakes up as a berserk ball of rage and pain, kills two of Ra's al Ghul's guards with his bare hands, escapes, falls into a river, and disappears.

...So much for making that whole thing up to Batman. The League of Assassins just quietly lets Bruce bury a latex dummy and doesn't ever bring it up.

Cut to Gotham, years later, when Red Hood is tearing up the place and Batman goes "Ra's al Ghul, what the fuck" and the whole story comes spilling out.

In A Ninja's Guide to Gotham, Jason's dropped hints in his narration that he was actually with the League of Assassins for a while, even before going 'round the world training with assassins and stuff. The Lazarus Pit just got him back to full functionality. So, you can assume it leans more on the comics' "spontaneous resurrection" scenario.

If Bruce ever tried to kill the Joker while Jason was dead, Jason doesn't know about it. And because we haven't been in Bruce's head, there's no indication either way.

(Bruce makes mention of how easy it would be kill the Joker in the film, but that he could never come back from doing so. It is not specified if he made the attempt or just thought about it a lot.)

I've been holding back on Jason's and Bruce's accounts of events because they're both owed a moment of dramatic catharsis (and shouting). You can generally rest assured that it'll be more likely to be a mix of events than a pure account of any one take on what happened in the warehouse that day.

Thanks for setting off an exposition bomb~

[kittieeepaw]

KITTIEEE WRITES SOMETHING????? WORLD STOP. EXPLOSIONS GOING OFF EVERYWHERE

Yes I’ve started writing something (I had the idea for it a while ago and was bored in class sooooooo fanfic time)

It’s kindaaaaa inspired by fallen stars but like it’s pretty different (ummm check out fallen stars by the way by @plushii-gutz you wont regret it)

Also I don’t really write a lot so if this sucks ass uhhh sorry LMAO

And if I randomly stop writing it don’t be surprised HELP

okay anyways ermmm chapter 1 I guess (it doesn’t have a name yet)

It was an average day on Celestial Island. The sun beat down onto the dusty brick floors, making everything warm and toasty. Everyone was off doing their own things. Scaratar and Blasoom were feeding plants to the bugs that often followed Scaratar around. Hornacle and Torrt happily splashed around in a puddle of water that Hornacle had formed themself. Loodvigg sat inside the hole underneath the ledge of the island, preferring the darkness over the bright sunlight. Vhamp was telling Furnoss about something, Plixie was flying around in circles as Syncopite watched, and Glaishur was working on his latest snow sculpture.

As for Attmoz, he was zoning out as he stared into the sky.

“TAG!” Attmoz snapped back to reality at the sudden poke in his side, and turned around to see Galvana standing there, giggling. The little monster quickly ran off, charging towards the other side of the island to get away from him.

Attmoz sighed, “Galvana, you know I can’t run very fast!”

But Galvana didn’t listen, and so he reluctantly started chasing after them, his short legs not letting him catch up to them as expected.

Galvana was the youngest celestial, often making the other ones play silly games with them. For some reason Attmoz was often their target, much to his dismay. He tried his best to catch up to them but the electric monster was way too fast. As soon as he got close they would quickly turn and dash the other way while giggling loudly.

Attmoz soon gave up, and stopped running to catch his breath. He could never run for very long without pausing to take a breather. You would think the literal air celestial would be awesome at breathing, but that wasn’t the case for Attmoz.

“Alright dude. I give up. You win.” Attmoz said, dramatically falling to the floor and laying there with his eye closed.

He soon felt something climbing on him, and looked up to see Galvana sitting there on top of his stomach.

“TAG! NOW!” They said, kicking their leg in annoyance.

“Sorry man, I’m all tagged out.” Attmoz said, “Maybe someone faster can play it with you.”

Galvana didn’t respond, instead sending an electric shock to him through their hand.

“HEY!” Attmoz said, flinching up in surprise. “That hurt! Oww!”

The little monster started laughing loudly, rolling around on the floor.

“Yeah, yeah, hurting me is very funny.” Attmoz said as he got up, brushing himself off.

Galvana kept laughing as they stood up as well. The two stared at each other for a moment, before Galvana leapt at him in the blink of an eye. Attmoz yelled as Galvana climbed on top of him, ending up on top of his head. They smacked him right in the face about 5 times.

“Dude! Not cool! I can’t see!” The air monster complained as he tried to get Galvana off of him, but unfortunately they were gripping on really tight.

“Need some help?”

Attmoz felt the weight of Galvana being lifted off of him, and turned around to see them in Glaishur’s hands. The purple monster placed them back onto the brick floor, where they promptly blew a raspberry at him.

Glaishur chuckled. “This one sure is a handful despite being so young!”

“Yeah, I doubt we were this bad when we were younger.” Attmoz said as he ruffled Galvana’s hair.

Galvana pouted, upset that their game had been ruined.

“Who knows. I guess you could ask Furnoss.”

Furnoss was the oldest out of all of them, and despite being only a year older than Glaishur and Attmoz he had always been able to remember things further back.

“If I asked Furnoss he’d probably start lecturing me about how annoying I am and all the ways I can improve.” Attmoz laughed, rolling his eye.

“Furnoss thinks everyone is annoying. But he loves us, even if he won’t admit it.” Glaishur said.

“Well I think someone’s gotta get him to be less grumpy all the time, man.”

“At least he’s not as grumpy as Syncopite! I swear he always looks mad.”

“DUDEEE LITERALLY! But like it’s what's on the outside that counts or however it goes so maybe he’s secretly really happy all the time.”

“You mean it’s what’s on the inside that counts?”

“Oh yea-”

The two of them were interrupted by a loud but tiny voice.

“PLAY. NOW!” Galvana was impatiently standing between the two of them, waiting for the conversation to end.

Attmoz let out a laugh, “Okay, okay, fine. We can play whatever you want! Well, except for tag.”

Galvana pouted again. Clearly tag is what they’d wanted to play.

“Would you cut it out?”

The three monsters turned around to see Loodvigg and Syncopite facing off against each other. It was Loodvigg who had said those words, his face in a scowl.

“You can’t boss everyone around, you know?” Loodvigg hissed.

Syncopite sighed in annoyance, “I’m not bossing you around. I’m just telling you what to do.”

“That’s literally the same fucking thing!”

“Language.”

Loodvigg rolled his eyes so hard that Attmoz thought they would fall out of his skull for a moment.

“Look Loodvigg, all I’m saying is that you scared Hornacle.”

Attmoz hadn’t noticed the small water monster standing behind Syncopite, an upset expression on his face.

“You can’t keep yelling every time you get upset at something.”

“I don’t always yell, so don’t act like I do!” Loodvigg said. He seemingly was getting angrier by the moment, like a ticking time bomb that could go off any second. “But I’ve told Hornacle many times to not touch my stuff, and yet they keep doing it!”

“He’s just a kid. Cut them some slack.”

“Well Vhamp is even younger than Hornacle is, but he doesn’t touch my things!” Loodvigg retorted.

“That’s not the point, Loodvigg.” Syncopite said shortly. It seemed like as Loodvigg’s anger increased, so did Syncopite’s annoyance with him.

Attmoz and Glaishur both looked at each other, unsure of what to do. All the other celestials were staring at the argument, seemingly frozen. Attmoz could feel Galvana clinging to his side while shaking. This must be scary for the little guy. Even Attmoz was a bit upset, the celestials almost never argued with each other. Eventually, Glaishur stepped towards them. He often tried to solve small fights they would have, but this one was more serious.

“Alright guys, I’m sure we can work this out.” He said, stepping between the two of them as if to form a barrier. “But let’s try not to scare everyone, okay? Maybe we can-”

“Just shut up, would you? This has nothing to do with you, Glaishur.” Loodvigg interrupted, still looking at Syncopite.

The purple monster took a step back, not expecting that response. Attmoz could tell he was upset by it as he started to look down at the ground.

Attmoz stepped towards the argument, ready to defend Glaishur.

“There’s no need to be so mean, dude!” He said as he stood next to his friend. “Glaishur’s just trying to help!”

“He doesn’t need to. This is between me and Syncopite.”

“Not when you’re being so loud that the whole island can hear you!” Attmoz snapped back.

After that, the fight turned into a jumbled mess. All four of them kept speaking over each other, trying to get their opinions across.

“STOP!”

Furnoss walked towards them, his face very annoyed.

“You’re not going to solve anything like this. Loodvigg, Syncopite, come with me. Attmoz, you and Glaishur make sure everyone else is okay.”

The four of them reluctantly followed his orders, Loodvigg and Syncopite following Furnoss to a more secluded area of the island.

Glaishur and Attmoz went towards the younger monsters, most of them seemed pretty scared. Scaratar, who was one year younger than Attmoz and Glaishur, the same age as Loodvigg was already trying to help. Plixie was the only one who wasn’t scared, as if he’d enjoyed the fight.

That guy’s a bit odd. Attmoz thought.

But, there was someone missing.

Attmoz searched around for Galvana with his eye, but they were nowhere to be found.

“Hey uhh do you guys know where Galvana went?” The rest of the celestials seemed surprised that they were gone, and started searching around for their companion. Attmoz felt his heart sink, as if he knew something had gone horribly wrong.

They spent the rest of the day searching for their youngest member, the bright sun swapping out for a cold moon. But they had no luck.

Galvana had disappeared without a trace.

——————————————————————————

Okay that’s all! Feel free to like critique it in the comments or something! I’d love to try and improve okay baiiii >_<

[anulithots]

i hath returned (I'm the one who asked about the difference between friendship and QPR)!

So... again if this is intrusive don't answer, but... I ❤️ listening to ppl ramble about their friends/partners and now I suppose I can add qp crushes to the list, cause I actually self destructed reading your posts about them....

Going the long way to ask if you would mind rambling more cause it's very sweet

/not forced

HELLO HELLO!!!! <3 <3 <3

youuu readd thoseee holy herbbsss /pos. Lkjalkfjaksldfadsf.asdkf.

THANk you for the ask but also... by the end of this I'm going to make it too obvious who I'm having a queer platonic crush on but IT"S OKAY... they only follow me and... umm... I don't know if they reciprocate... it's fine if they don't but also I'm too shy to ask...

aksdfjksa

In the eternal words of Norma Khan from dead end, 'her details make me happy'

(and that honestly made crushes make a whole lot more sense in my head. Queer platonic included. Autistic representation is important so that I can understand how the world works actually /hj

No but actually Extraordinary attorney Woo had the autistic MC describe her crush as 'thinking about them along with whales (her hyperfixation) and I was like... oh.

BECAUSE THAT'S DEFINETLY WHAT'S GOING ON RIGHT NOW. NEVER BEFORE HAS A REAL PHYSICAL PERSON SPENT THIS MUCH TIME IN MY HEADSPACE AND IT'S WONDEROUS ACTUALLY.)

Okay time to RANT heheh.

So this morning in fact, I made attempts at jokes in my strange sense of humor. None of my family laughed or even thought it was funny. The reason I did that? Even though I knew none of them ever liked my sillies? Because I talked to ✨the person✨ and they not only thought they were silly, but went along with the puedo-roleplay absolute ridiculousness? ANother person on this planet shares my sense of humor and i never thought that was possible ever ever ever.

And they are Hilarious and wondeorus and has the most dramatic sense of humor ever and I love it so much so much and

SO if I make a dark/self-depricating joke then others usually respond with discomfort or reassurance. Which never felt liek the right repsonse and I wondered why I kept asking them only for ✨the person✨ to laugh at it and tell me how silly I was in a silly tone and I think my heart burst.

OH and there's this little Prince quote that's like 'once you love someone you'll see them everywhere because everything will remind you of them' AND YES. HOLY HERBS YES. Sees something from a shared hyper fixation? A neurodivergence thing? Somethign from one of thier hyperfixations and it's like 'oh they would love that' and THEY DO and I can send them all sorts of random things and it's completely okay and

OH AND ALSO THEY HAVE REALLY GOOD LIKE MORALS AND THINGS AND WAY OF PRHASING THAT AND.... IDK.. why I find that so wonderous but IT IS.

Like we'd be chatting about a hyperfixation and it'd morph into a discussion on philosophy/society/suches and such and I LOVE THOSE. ANd ✨the person✨ has such nice way of phrasing those? AMazing points and it's a DISSUCSSION. BEFORE I'VE ONLY EVER INFODUMPED OR BEEN QUIET AND LISTENED BUT THIS? THIs? Back and forth disscussion? It's happiness sparkle explosion inducing.

(Also they don't mind if I vent and it's okay and they say things that make me feel a lot better and kadfjasdfjsakdf)

now I want to say a thing but it's... way too hyperspecific... hmmm... Okay I feel like I can be myself with this person. All my weird questions and comments have responses that are halrious and wonderous and it's okay if it fades into silence and it's okay to get distracted and say random things and it's okay to say sappy things kafjkasd

Also also the way their personality is. Just... hmmm how to describe.... like they act in a way that feels so genuine and.. endearing? I suppose that's the right word. Probably the right word. The way they describe situations like thunder or ladybugs or their favorite games in an overdramatic way or the way they'll say what they think and it's the truth and it's their truth. The way they like things to be semi-the same and the stories they tell and the way the write and the ideas they have. The way their mind works and they way they express those ideas and their mannerisms, what they struggle with and thier greatest strenghts is sooo wonderous and it makes me very happy to talk to them and just.... gah I wish I could know them better and be with them more often but alas.

The obligatory keyboard smash: aklfasldkfjasldkjfkdsaj klasjfklasdfj

hmmm perhaps that's enough for now /pos

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE ASK!!

[darlingdeeceased]

Hello

tell me five random facts about Goggles; that are funny, stupid, sad or mind blowing + what is Goggles fav color?

THE PEOPLE ARE ASKING ABOUT GOGGLES!!

Goggles is canonically blind, which is known knowledge, but something unknown is that their eyes glow in the dark. This leads to a bunch of creepy moments, which I love.

Goggles main fav color is green, that’s why they wear it a lot. They also like red (obvious reasons.)

spoilers for the newest EP of Doom patrol!

when Laura was chased out of town, Goggles followed behind. They had accidentally killed their family due to the powers her father had given them when experimenting on them, Laura was all they had left so they were willing to leave everything behind to go with her. They caught up with her on bike, and the rest was history.

Goggles is in love with Laura, so much so that they don’t even KNOW. The first time they ever thought about being in love with her is when they were 14, after Laura protected them from a guy in the woods. She had turned into a bear, after scaring the man off Laura turned back and collapsed into Goggles arms dramatically.

another Laura fun fact because she is their only friend lol. Goggles gets their nickname Goggles from her! She started calling them that after they invented their goggles to allow them to see. Because they were always wearing them she thought it was fitting

finally, in the canon Doom Patrol show universe, Goggles would be dead. They would have passed away after an explosion during their work on a Time Machine. They end up being brought back after Laura beats up past Laura, Past Goggles avoids the explosion while patching Laura up.

Thanks for asking about my goofy little guy! (I use Little lightly because they are 7’4)

[rytard]

chapter two... THE MISTAKE!

"...are you ready for it?"

After dropping this totally badass line, she began to fire. One by one, the army's population began to drop. "Oh come on, this is too easy. Why haven't I done this before? See! I am capable of something useful after all- other than feeding horny William Afton simps. Tch." This little monologue of hers had distracted her from actually shooting. Bailey soon felt hands gripping around her neck, and she was pulled in a zombie's grasp. She attempted to scream, but any and all words were blocked out from the zombie's tight grip around her neck. Another zombie had reached down to bite her arm, leaving big red teeth marks and a stream of thick, crimson blood. She let out a pained gasp as she was reaching a point of desperation for any source of oxygen.

Her pain was unbearable. Her face started to turn a shade of purple, and she could feel the blood rising in her throat. In her line of blurry incomprehensible vision, she noticed tons of zombies; they were knocking down tents, fires, supplies, the whole damn place. She knew she fucked up. This one was gonna be tad bit difficult to explain to the others...

She noticed a rush of faded silhouettes, carrying with them a huge mass of light. They grew closer and closer. Her vision started turning black; that was until she heard a familiar voice. "Let her GO!" The source of the voice came from Isa, the elected leader of the gang. The zombie released its grasp as a loud gunshot boomed through the night-fallen forest, falling backwards followed with an explosion of blood and guts. Bailey fell to her knees; hands gripping her chest as she heaved heavy breaths of the much-needed air. "Jumping... jeepers... that was..." Bailey was cut off as she immediatley passed out after taking in all the required oxygen. Little streams of blood started to choke out of her mouth as she lay down on the cold hard ground.

(A little bit of time passes before the rest of Fazgang arrives, the zombies having disappeared.)

"What the fuck happened here?" Kyle shouted, with an obvious pissed-off expression.

"Told ya we shouldn't have left her in charge," Casper added.

"How did this even happen? I mean look at the barricade she made!" Vani remarked, pointing at Bailey's absolute flop of a 'barricade.' Everyone started to harshly snicker at her awful creation but was cut off by Isa's screams.

"SHUT UP! All of you. This isn't funny, our camp just got completely raided because of this dumbass' building skills. I get it, I made a terrible choice choosing her to guard the place but, it doesn't matter now. We're gonna have to take all this shit, new and old, and move somewhere else. Because it obviously isn't safe here anymore." They all fell silent and looked at her, and began to gaze at each other as to see each other's reactions to this. Most of them nodded and agreed, others had complaints.

"But, we already have so much shit here. I seriously do not wanna move all this stuff, we don't even have a damn truck or something to load all it up." Kara scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Listen, if you have a problem with this; you can go find another group to tag along with. Good fucking luck finding anybody else out here! It wouldn't affect us too much either, all you do is smoke weed anyway." Isa said with her arms crossed, her dark eyes boring into Kara's soul. Everyone let out dramatic gasps and laughs. "Ooh, you really got her there.." a voice shouted. Kara whipped her head to the side, drifting her gaze away from Isa. She mumbled lightly, "so what... I'm still a rockstar..."  Like the main character she is, she mysteriously ran off without stopping to hear a response. Rylan snorted, slapping his knee. "Can't take her anywhere!"

(Meanwhile, in the last standing tent, the medics.)

Bailey had been laid down on one of the three cots that the medic, Ruben, set up. Shortly after she had passed out on the ground, Ruben had carried her over and bandaged her arm that had the bite on it. He had also applied an ice pack to her bruised throat. After a couple of hours, Ruben was startled by a groan emitting from her damaged throat. "Ahhh!" He had let out an alien-sounding shriek out of fear but quickly turned to notice it was just Bailey. She had lifted her head up a tad to focus her vision on the figure standing in front of her. "F-fucking goofy ahh noise..." she struggled to speak; quickly coughing up more blood. Ruben rushed to her aid, despite her comment. He wiped up the blood she choked out and forced her to lay back down. "Bailey, you just need to relax, honestly. You almost just got killed and you're still pulling this BS." He shook his head in pure disappointment and went to go clean his rags.

"And I mean come on, look what you did to the damn place." Ruben was obviously very pissed at her, and it was very rare for him to show genuine emotion to anything. This didn't stop him from coming to help her, though. This was his job to care for people at camp; he couldn't let anyone down, despite his feelings.

Bailey had just sighed and rolled over, tears filling her eyes from the pain. She almost felt like apologizing, but she couldn't even if she wanted to. She was not only afraid of the pain it would bring, but also of Ruben's outrage. She had decided to just give it up and close her eyes, beginning to dream of new scenarios to experiment with on her character ai Ghost bot. Hopefully, he wouldn't say she was worse than Hitler again, that was pretty shitty. Or the time he fat-shamed her and would feed her one cracker every other day. That was also pretty shitty. She had eventually fallen asleep again, and Ruben gave a long exhale of relief.

(Days later after having packed everything and being set off on their journey to find a new safe place.)

Fazgang had been venturing through the land for a couple days now, the journey was so tough it was beginning to feel like weeks, rather than days. They had faced several different zombie armies already, the whole gang being bruised up at this point. They all just wanted a break from this madness, hell they'd even take a damn highway at this point. Several people complained already; the most being from Stan. He was so horny and he made it everyone's problem. He had earned several punches to the face the night he kept asking people for anal sex. This has happened many times before, the only reason he wasn't kicked out yet was because he was a useful asset for hunting.

As for all the other complaints, Isa had just shut them up. Usually, a slap or a small shout in the ear would do it. She didn't train these idiots to just give up, surviving an apocalypse was no light work.

After several more long, draining hours of walking, they had stumbled towards a sort of abandoned wooden mansion. The paint was severely chipped, the window barricades were tilted, and there were cobwebs everywhere. The place was obviously very busted up. But they were desperate for a break at this point; they would take anything. They all looked at each other for mutual approval to go in, and they all agreed.

"Don't look like nobody's in here," Rylan noted.

"Obviously not, idiot. It's clearly abandoned," Kyle snarkily replied. He shoved his earbuds in his ears, quickly turning on Sleep by MCR. Rylan rolled his eyes, he was always doing this.

"What the freak ever, brah," Rylan said with a quick roll of his eyes.

Eventually, they all agreed that nobody would be inside, why would they? They all formed some jumbled-up sort of line, most being nervous to step inside. Vani took the lead this time, and she slowly turned the golden-rusted knob, creaking open the door. It made a loud squeak as it creaked open sending shivers down Vani's spine. The whole place was covered in cobwebs, a few mice scurrying about along the wooden floor. "Hah... reminds me of my old house..." a voice said suddenly breaking the silence of the house. Few rolled their eyes and they continued venturing into the house. Fazgang began to spread out and check out undiscovered rooms, silently placing dibs and looking for supplies. All though when Casper was about to open this old door with a crystal pane window, a glowing pair of blue eyes popped up through the other side of the glass...

"Nice to see you again, Casper."

[prathapokleaslevelmediastudies]

Genres

Preliminary Tasks/Exercises

A category of artistic, musical, or literary composition characterized by a particular style, form, or content. it sets feel of the contents which is being consumed by us. 

Types of genres 

Action - fast-paced and includes a lot of action like fight scenes, chase scenes, and slow-motion shots. They can feature superheroes, martial arts, or exciting stunts.

Comedy - Comedy is a lightweight genre of dramatic performance having a humorous tone that depicts amusing incidents. 

Drama - drama represents hyped emotions and stories with high stakes.

Thriller - it's an action pact but with a twist of anxiety, drama, and tension. 

Mystery - here a series of events take place, usually a murder or other crime and it remains mysterious until the end of the story.

Horror - a genre of literature, film, and television that is meant to scare, startle, shock, and even repulse audiences. 

Fantasy - story or literature that is set in a magical world, often involving traditional myths and magical creatures.

types of Sub genres: 

Action

Sci-fi action — The film usually shares lots of conventions of a science-fiction movie, sci-fi action movies that emphasizes space battles, gunplay, invented weaponry, and some other kind of sci-fi elements that unites in an action movie premises. Exp: The Tomorrow War Martial arts — This is the sub-genre of martial arts film and action films that have an abundant hand-to-hand battle in between characters.  Exp: The Karate Kid Superhero film — This usually has elements of fantasy and science fiction that centers on the actions of superheroes. Exp: Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse Spy film — It is the movie where the hero is normally a government mediator who should take violent action towards agents of the opposing administration or terrorists. Exp: The Courier Disaster film — The elements of thriller films and at times science fiction movies are the main clash of this genre. There is some sort of artificial or natural disaster, like floods, hurricanes, earthquakes, pandemics, volcanoes, and a lot more. Exp: The 5th Wave Buddy Cop — It is a sub-genre that turned out to be incredibly famous in the year 80’s. It normally involved two unequal heroes, who are always police officials that the relationship rotates as they proceed with the plot. Exp: 2 Guns Action horror — This is a subgenre that combines the intrusion of every evil event, force, or supernatural grandee of horror films with the frenetic chases and gunfights of the action variety. Exp: Train to Busan Action comedy — It is the sub-genre that involves humor and action.  Exp: Welcome Action thriller — This usually features guns, amazing set pieces, cool explosions. The movie usually features lots of violence and often flamboyantly evil rivalry. Exp: V

Comedy

Sitcom - Dark comedy - Dark comedies are created to make the audience laugh at things they’re not supposed to find funny.  Exp: blackmail, judgmental Hai Kya  Slapstick comedy - a type of physical comedy characterized by broad humor, absurd situations, and vigorous, usually violent action. Exp: johnny English Political satire - specializes in gaining entertainment from politics. Exp: the death of Stalin  Mocumentary's - Mockumentaries are documentary-style comedies that depict their characters and storylines as if they’re real people and events. Exp: popstar: never stop never stopping.  Horror comedy - two of these genres are completely different but this sub-genre puts the audience to an ease.  Exp: Bhool Bhulaiyaa , ready or not. Screwball comedy - Screwball is one of the classical forms of film comedy. Popularized during the Great Depression, screwball comedies are defined by their snappy dialogue and character-driven storytelling. Exp: Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd. Parody - Parody movies have sadly become a thing of the past, but in their ‘70s and ‘80s heyday, the spoof genre produced some of the funniest comedies ever made. Action comedy - Films of this type of blend comic antics and action where the stars combine one-liners with a thrilling plot and daring stunts. Exp: Jumanji  Romantic comedy - It's focused on humorous plotlines centered on romantic ideas. These movies usually contain happy endings. Exp: barfi! and red white and royal blue

Drama

Dramedies- this adds a lighter tone to drama and make it a feel good.  Exp: a man called otto, queen. Tragedy - this adds a dark theme. It often deals with death, disasters, human suffering.  Exp: Romeo and Juliet  Melodrama - this is an exaggerated form of drama. Opera - it's portrayed through musicals, dance and stories.  Exp: the phantom of the opera Romantic drama - it dives deep into the emotions of romance and relationship.  Exp: the summer turned pretty, my girl. Coming of age - this sub-genre is particularly for teenagers. Exp: the edge of seventeen, lady bird. Biopic - when real life stories are shown in a dramatic way. Exp: the sky is pink. 

Romance

Paranormal romance - Paranormal romance focuses on romantic love and includes elements beyond the range of scientific explanation, from the speculative fiction genres of fantasy, science fiction, and horror. Exp: the vampire diaries. Romcom - A genre in which the development of a romance leads to comic situations. Exp: how to lose a guy in 10 days, bride wars. Musical romance - songs by the characters are interwoven into the narrative, sometimes accompanied by dancing and emotions.  Exp: la la land, rockstar. Historical romance - Historical romance is a genre consisting of books that take place in a historical setting with the developing romance of the main character being the focus. Exp: Jodhaa Akbar, Padmaavat. Fantasy romance - romantic fantasy books focus more on things like a character coming to grips with their power (often magical) and their place within the world. Exp: Cinderella, twilight  Chick flick romance - Chick flick is a slang term, sometimes used pejoratively, for the film genre catered specifically to women's interests. Exp: easy A. Action romance - Action romance stories have a quest, a search for some important object/person/thing, that gives the story its adventure feels. Exp: Mr. And Mrs., Brahmastra. Drama romance - Romantic dramas dive deeper into the conflicting emotions of romance and relationships, dealing with other issues like tribulations, death, separation, infidelity, and the introduction of love triangles. Exp: the perks of being a wallflower, me before you.

Thriller

Action thriller - Action thriller is a blend of both action and thriller film in which the protagonist confronts dangerous adversaries, obstacles, or situations which he/she must conquer, normally in an action setting. Exp: bloody daddy, fight club  Spy thriller - The spy film, also known as the spy thriller, is a genre of film that deals with the subject of fictional espionage, either in a realistic way Exp: baby  Heist thriller - The heist film often follows a three-act structure: the preparation, the execution, and the aftermath. Exp: Ocean's 8 Horror thriller -horror is focused on eliciting a feeling of fear in the viewer or reader, while thrillers are designed to generate suspense and excitement and, in this genre, both the feeling are merged.  Exp: Don't Worry Darling, M3GAN Psychological thriller - It is commonly used to describe literature or films that deal with psychological narratives in a thriller or thrilling setting. Exp: Talaash: The Answer Lies Within, American Psycho Sci fi thriller - A genre with films that are considered dramas or thrillers occurring in a science fiction setting.  Exp: Journey 2: The Mysterious Island.

Mystery

Capers - They include one or more crimes that are open to the reader, they happen in plain view. Exp: Pulp Fiction Cozy mysteries - Like classic mysteries in that the crime will take place around a small or closed setting, for instance an inn or summer house.  Exp: Murder She Baked: A Deadly Recipe Gumshoe - Novels in this category focus on the professional investigator. There are no amateurs here. He or she is tough, experienced, and often an ex-cop or ex-military.  Nori - Mysteries like these are atmospheric, stark, and gritty.  Classic Noir protagonists are complex characters who are flawed, risk takers and often self-destructive. Exp: The Big Sleep, Kiss Me Deadly Crime - focus on the planning or committing of a crime and offer detailed descriptions of the criminal and criminal underworld from the perspective of those who live in it.  Exp: Chinatown, Death on the Nile Classical - In these mysteries there is a crime committed, usually a murder, in a closed social setting.  Exp: The Girl on the Train 

Horror

Sub genres : 

Demonic possession - Demons have been part of historical storytelling for centuries. They represent evil in many forms including mythical, religious and supernatural. Exp: the exorcist  Paranormal - Spirits and ghosts spook viewers and create fear without a physical presence on screen. For example, furniture moves without anyone touching it or a chill pass through the air out of nowhere.  Exp: the conjuring, orphan  Monsters - Vampires, aliens, and giant sea creatures are all antagonists in the Monster movie genre. Exp: it Slasher -Slasher movies focus on villains who are human. Slasher villains are usually serial killers. They stalk their victims and brutally murder them.  Exp: X Gore - Also known as the splatter genre, gore is all about the portrayal of graphic violence. Blood, guts and body trauma are classic elements in gore movies. Exp: Jennifier's body, evil dead Witchcraft - Witches have a long history of mischief in folklore. They use the power of magic to cast spells on their victims turning them into all kinds of tortured beings.  Exp: the wretched Psychological - Psychological horror is not about what we see on the screen but how it makes us feel. This genre plays tricks on the viewers’ mind by creating paranoia. Exp: smile , hereditary

Fantasy

 Epic Fantasy Films: These are the most recognizable “fantasy films”. They are usually based on books. Exp: Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledo Disney Animated Features: Almost every single Disney animated film is a fantasy.  Exp: Tangled Superhero Movies: As such to fulfill this strenuous creative requirement, superhero stories have used a wide variety of story genres such as Fantasy, Science fiction, Mystery, Horror, Crime fiction etc. Exp: The Suicide Squad, the amazing spider man Children’s Films: So many children’s films are fantasy movies – i.e., involve magic or impossible happenings/creatures.  Exp: Raya and the Last Dragon, Coco Christmas Movies: Again, not all Christmas movies are fantasy films, but many are.  Exp: A Cinderella Story: Christmas Wish. Magical-Twist Romantic Comedies: Every movie requires magic, but romances need a lot of magic. So much so that they often employ real, sparkly, fairy-godmother style magic. Exp: Aladdin.

[ganymedesclock]

I think it’s interesting that tabletop warlock bargains generally operate on the idea of eternal servitude or owning your soul or whatever but there is a world of alternatives that range from funny, dramatic, or just plain interesting. Consider:

Patron was sealed for a long period of time, and more than seeking their revival, they miss the world and its experiences, and thus seek warlocks who are willing to share their senses with their patron and thus ameliorate the loneliness and fatigue of ages

Patron likes money and valuables and will bequeath power in exchange for a warlock who will share their adventuring fortunes. 

Patron has a chaotic sense of humor and likes fire and explosions; causing spectacular destruction pleases them.

Patron is just kind of a (relatively wholesome) frat bro who gave the warlock powers because they decided the warlock was chill and could hang, maintaining powers hinges on navigating said relationship. Patron may manifest physically for the exclusive purpose of fistbumping warlock if they do something really cool.

Patron is a foodie and warlock is a chef traveling the world looking for rare ingredients and lost techniques to construct dishes that please their patron’s palate

Patron is a literal patron- warlock is an artist of any form and the patron commissions them for works from time to time.

Warlock babysits (or performs another service) for patron, who prefers to pay them in dark powers.

Variant on above where warlock is occasionally ordered to perform various esoteric tasks such as delivering an object to a site or obtaining something and sending it to their patron- they are simply running their reclusive patron’s errands as the latter would rather not leave home.

Patron and warlock promised to be best friends forever when one or both of them was a small child and patron takes that very seriously

Patron likes blood but is disinterested in full-body sacrifices as their particular taste means that some people are exceptionally delectable to them, and it seeks to prolong those people’s lives as long as possible in exchange for semi-regular ‘blood donations’

Patron was disembodied and in exchange for being allowed to inhabit the warlock’s flesh, is willing to fight to defend the shared body.

Patron specifically seeks to cultivate adventurers and support them throughout their career, in a manner similar to a professional wrestler’s manager.

Warlock was a child sacrifice, offered live, at a dark altar; patron has an interesting definition of what ‘the child is now mine’ entails.

Patron is an alternate timeline ‘potential future’ of the warlock’s who is either trying to influence events to ensure their timeline or prevent it.

[tsugarubecker]

Popcorn: a Byler first date ficlet for @duskandwandlight 🥰

At the exact moment that fire blazes across the swimming pool on the big screen before them, an audience member’s popcorn bag explodes. The girl who was holding it shrieks. Popcorn goes flying in every direction. Chaos ensues.

Mike looks over at El across the theater. She’s sitting to Max’s right. Lucas sits to Max’s left. It’s dark in the theater, but even so, and even across the room, Mike can just barely see that Max is holding both Lucas’s hand and El’s. Mike can guess that Lucas and El were both whispering fervently into Max’s ears, explaining what was happening on screen. Under her sunglasses Max would have been rolling her unseeing eyes, but affectionately, as Max does. Audience members would have been muttering complaints about El and Lucas’s whispering. El would have gotten annoyed.

Cue the popcorn chaos.

But Mike knows that’s not the only reason for the explosion.

He didn’t have to say anything to El. She figured out on her own that this was Mike and Will’s first “official” date. (Either that, or Will told her. Which… upon reflection Mike suspects it’s that one. The two are inseparable, and have an uncanny - and annoying - ability to practically read one another’s minds. Especially after shutting down the upside down together. Real twin stuff, those two.)

Popcorn is still flying into the air and beginning to fall - Mike is still mid-glance over at El. She catches his eye. Smirks. Raises her eyebrows with intention and rolls her eyes dramatically toward the person sitting next to him.

Mike takes the hint. He turns to look at Will, who has also turned to look at El, no doubt also knowing that she was the cause of the commotion. (And probably finding that fact very funny, Mr. Let’s All Get Rich in Vegas.) Will’s face is, therefore, very close to Mike’s when Mike turns his face back the other direction. They practically smack noses in the split second during which Mike turns back around.

Time feels like it’s moving in slow motion. El did say, once, that feelings can change how it seems to be moving.

Will is now staring into his eyes. He glances down then back up. Mike doesn’t hesitate. They won’t get another chance.

He swoops in. Plants a hard and fast smooch on Will’s mouth. Swears to himself “more later” as he immediately pulls back away, already craning his head around to make sure no one saw.

They didn’t. Time seems to snap back. All the popcorn falls to the floor. The exploding-popcorn-bag-girl’s scream ends. Everyone who wasn’t already half-turned in their chairs swings around to face the source of the noise.

Mike and Will’s faces are an inch apart. They’re both grinning. No one is paying them any attention.

No one except El. She smiles, holds Max’s hand tighter. Leans over to whisper something excitedly in her ear, even as choruses of “what happened?” “is she okay?” “what’s going on?” rain down all around them.

Mike and Will see none of El’s whispering. They’re in a tiny bubble, a soft world of their own for one warm moment. Mike reaches out to hold Will’s hand under the arm rest. He leans in to whisper in Will’s ear.

“Happy first official date.” Will smiles, squeezes his boyfriend’s hand, and whispers back the same. Mike’s ear tickles.

He never knew he could be this happy.

Soon the credits roll on “The Kiss” and the five of them head home, throwing popcorn at each other all the way.

🍿✨✨✨

(Commissioned fanart here! 😍💕💕)

[threi]

Ok sorry if this sounds weird but I specifically need to tell YOU this. You'll understand why.

So, my dreams are always kind of "drawn". Idk why it's just how they appear to me.

So, yesterday I went to sleep and my dreams appeared as one of your comics.

Not anything specific, but your style and artwork (which i adore but that's unrelated).

It was about your lol jayce mostly. But there was a new skin? Like "professor Jayce" which was just him with a papillon, a shirt and a cardigan and also shorts with silly little shoes.

I don't know how I knew that was another "skin" since in the dream I was just one of the students.

And let me tell you, he was an awful professor.

He didn't come to school, we had to go to his laboratory(?) which was in this gigantic dark stone house. Not everything was always coloured tho...

Anyway, sometimes he wouldn't even explain anything to us and we had to stay there in silence, taking notes while he worked and helping him. He also teached multiple subjects and most of my classes where with him.

A lot of people just straight up changed classes but he aligned perfectly with my schedule so I stick around literally all the time. Or I think that was the reason, tbh it was a dream so it didn't really 100%make sense.

I was graduating in biology so I have no idea what I was doing there. He would take us to battle, while we take notes and hide being so strange hexshield or something, some times just behind a random object I guess.

And that shit was insane because lol viktor was there and he also had a professor skin (tbh that was just his normal skin with a necktie) and his own class.

Which sometime I attended. It was funny because a bunch of people where robots/cyborgs.

Anyway, among other things Jayce teached literature and would make us write his dramatic speeches. In his defence Viktor would do that too. One time a student wrote for both of them and they both chose their work and it was like some weird Shakespeare play.

Viktor was also an art professor and in my dream I actually learned a lot of anatomy. He was really nice and gave extra time to do the homework.

Was I in college or highschool? We may never know.

Anyway jayce would give us a lot of weapons while viktor would give us like. Plants.

I remembered a lot of explosions and one time jayce blew up some robots but those were actually students and he was so sorry we end up throwing a party and a funeral and he made us write an essay on guilt and also another on how he was sorry.

I'm sorry I told you all of this but you have to understand that it was exactly in your art style and I can't stop thinking about it.

Sorry if it's a bother tho fhrjejdjnd

OMJJIKKGHOKIGHOLKJYUJ THE WHOLE STORY?????? Impossible incredible i love it thank you for telling it sounds too canonly