#It's Only a Test
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winchester90210 · 5 years ago
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The BH 90210 Rewrite. 1x18: It’s Only A Test
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Read the previous chapter here!
Chapter Summary: The SATs, health emergencies, and way too many feelings.
Warnings: mentions of tumors and loss of a loved one, a little bit of angst, maybe a swear word somewhere. I think that’s it!
Word Count: 2,300 My work is not to be reposted and/or edited without my expressed written consent. (Reblogging is fine and encouraged!!) Feedback is incredibly appreciated! :)
A/N:Thanks for everyone’s patience! I had to take a little time off due to Shannen coming out about her cancer returning. It just felt weird to hear about that and then write a chapter about Brenda having a cancer scare. I just needed a little time to process it, but now I’m back and the next chapter (April is the Cruelest Month) is ACTUALLY going to come out next week! Very excited about that. Okay, okay, I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! :) I’d usually link the song for the chapter but it’s not letting me for some reason. The song I would’ve linked is Opposites Attract by Paula Abdul if you still want to check it out! -
Seven days. Seven days! You have seven days to prepare for the SAT. Not six. Sure, you’ve been preparing for it practically your entire life but… a week? It’s like a sick joke or something.
You chew on the end of your pencil, bouncing your leg in a monotonous yet anxious fashion against the wooden desk in the newsroom. Staring down at the article in front of you, your heart pounds. It’s official. No one at this school knows how to use a comma and you can’t possibly fix everyone’s mistakes but you’re gonna die trying. How the hell does Andrea do this? And why did she think dropping all of her work on you right before the biggest test of your life was a good idea?
So you have to cover for her and prepare for the SATs all at the same time— not a big deal! It’s fine! You’d still have plenty of time to see your boyfriend, make sure you can get into a decent college, and see that the next issue of the Blaze gets out on time. Piece of cake! And hey, if you happen to make it out of all of this sane, that’s just a bonus.
“Y’know, I’ve wondered who’s been masticating all the pencils around here,” Brandon teases you as he struts over. You look up from the desk for the first time in half an hour to meet his glance.
“Masticating? Why— why use that word? You could’ve used chewed or chomped or a thousand other words. Masticating is totally unnecessary. Masticating is the kind of word that you learn on one of those super expensive, way too exclusive SAT prep courses.”
“What, like Alfred B. Cook?” He cocks an eyebrow up, pulling a stool from beside him to sit down next to you.
“‘Or you be fried,’” you quote exasperatedly, resting your head in your hand.
“Let me guess— Steve?”
“Bingo,” you sigh.
“If it makes you feel any better, I don’t think those prep courses even work. The SATs are designed to test you on stuff you already know, you can’t cram for them.”
“That’s what I told Steve to begin with but… then again, maybe you can! I mean if there is some kind of system or something, then everyone else who can’t afford those stupid overpriced courses is put at a total disadvantage! And I- I can’t afford to be put at any kind of disadvantage, not with everything I have to do!“
“First off, Y/N/N, you’re the smartest person I know! Besides, it’s just a test. A test that you can take twice if you want to. Second… I think you need to cut back on the coffee because you’re about five seconds away from short-circuiting.” You roll your eyes at him for the coffee jab, but you know he’s right.
“Well, sure, it’s just a test— but it’s a test that’ll determine whether I end up at Stanford or San Quentin.”
-
“So, you know how we were all at Kelly’s studying for the SATs?” You nod in response, joining Brenda on the edge of her bed. Brenda crosses her arms over her chest, settling back into her bed. “Well, she was reading this magazine and it had this thing in it about… where y’know, you check your breasts for lumps.” She stirs in her spot, kicking her feet up onto the bed. “So—“ she inhales and her voice is low, solemn. “we all decided to do it. I don’t know why, I guess we were bored.” There’s something in the way that she starts gazing off, staring mindlessly into the corner of her bedroom that rubs you the wrong way. Something was off.
“Bren, that’s not something we have to worry about at our age.”
“Well, the article said that even people our age should get into the habit. So, we all did the test,” her words begin to waver as she speaks, “And I thought I felt something.” Her eyes well up, lower eyelids reddening against her tears that are threatening to break through. “So, I talked to my mom and we went to the doctor.”
No. No no no no no. There’s no way… but would she even be telling you about this if there was nothing to worry about? Your stomach lurches instinctively. Suddenly you didn’t feel so well.
“And?” The second she takes to respond feels like an hour as you await her response.
“It’s a tumor.” You shake your head, stammering.
“That—that— How is that possible? I mean, you’re only sixteen and—and—“ you stop yourself short to take a deep, thoughtful breath. “Bren…”
You don’t know what else there is to do besides pulling her into a hug. Her head sits on your shoulder and your hand is resting on her back. You sit like that for a moment, finding comfort in each other’s company. You’d never had a friend like her before. Sure, you’ve had friends, but nothing could hold a candle to what you have with her. It was nice, having someone you could talk about anything with, free of judgment, free of criticism. And the thought of losing that… losing her? As that starts to sink in, it terrifies you.
“We’re getting a biopsy on Saturday,” she whispers.
There’s a beat before you mumble, “At least you get to miss the SATS?”
-
“So, Steve, any glorious plans this evening?” You meet up with your friend on the way out of West Beverly.
“I was planning on studying. You know what they say— ‘Alfred B. Cook—‘“
“Or you be fried, yeah, I get it. Can I come?”
“Are you asking me for a date?” He flashes a mischievous grin, to which you scoff.
“Of course I am,“ you tease, “Nothing and I mean nothing gets me in the mood for romance like my boyfriend’s best friend and the impending doom of a standardized test.” Steve rolls his eyes, waiting for you to finish. “Look, of course I’m not asking you for a date. What I am asking you for is the Alfred B. Cook advantage. The notes, practice tests, secret government documents– whatever you’ve got.” You shoot him a pair of pleading eyes. "Hey, I’ve gotta go… see you at eight?” You start to slowly tread backward in the direction of your car as you talk.
You turn on your heel toward the parking lot as you hear him call out “It’s a date!”
“No it’s not!”
-
“Hey, turn it off— we’re supposed to be studying!” You plead loudly as he turns the radio on his nightstand up, pop music blaring so loud you’re surprised the furniture isn’t shaking.
“Come on, you love this song!”
“Steve, everybody loves this song. Paula‘s a goddess of pop,” you dismiss him, reaching over and twisting the dial down.
“Loosen up. Y’know, what you really need is some fun,” he turns the dial to the other side, and now you’re back at square one.
“I have plenty of fun!” you narrow your eyes challengingly, but when you go to turn it back down, a small neon orange ball comes hurdling at your face. You gasp, dodging the projectile aimed at your head. “Did you really just throw an off-brand cheese ball at my face?”
“Maybe I did… maybe I didn’t,” he shrugs nonchalantly, moving over to the lounge chair in the corner of his room.
“What are you, five?” You reprimand him, and as he bends over to pick up a pencil from his carpet, you scoop the plastic bucket of cheese balls, firing a few directly at him. They hit his shoulder blade, crumbling as they fall down to the carpet, hints of orange residue leaving itself all over Steve.
“Who’s five now?”
-
“Okay, you got four choices, right? Well, out of those four, one will be a total throwaway,” Steve explains, pacing around his room as you catapult yourself back onto his bed, settling to sit cross-legged. It had only taken an hour and a handful of cheese balls to get a Steve to actually start studying.
“Wait, really?“
“Yeah! They do it so they can weed out the morons,” he nods, “No you’ve got three choices left and out of those three choices, one word will often mean the total opposite, so you can rule that one out too. Then you’re down to two choices, and even if you don’t know the answer, you’ve still got a 50/50 shot.”
“That makes it so much easier!” You fall back dramatically and rest your forearm under the back of your head.
“Yeah, you just can’t spend too much time on one question, you have to breeze through it with total confidence and no hesitation.”
“God, I hope I can do it.” You exhale, watching the fan on the ceiling swirl around.
“You can do it. You’re smart already. In fact, I think that’s your problem. You totally outsmart yourself.” He joins you on his queen size bed, lying down beside you.
“Well, sometimes I wish I wasn’t so ‘smart,’” you scoff.
“You know what?” He waits until you’re looking at him with curious eyes to continue, “you’re pretty cute when you’re not biting my head off.” You roll your eyes at his bluntness. If he was anyone else you’d probably be a little offended, but it was Steve. You were way too used to it now.
“Is that supposed to be some kind of compliment?”
“No…” You watch as his eyes flicker from your own, to your lips, then slowly back up to your eyes. “This is.” He leans forward, and before you can even process what’s happening, his lips are on yours.
You sock him hard in the shoulder, shooting up from his bed.
“Steve!”
“What?” He grabs his shoulder as if in pain, but you know it’s only his ego that’s wounded.
“What the hell, man?!” You run your hands through your hair, groaning out in frustration. “Why on earth would you do that?!”
“Well, uh… I don’t know. I thought I was picking up on something, that’s all.”
“I have to go… Hey, I’m sure you helped my score two—three hundred points.” You scramble to get your things together, actively avoiding looking Steve in the eye.
-
“Hey, B,” you join Brandon on the grass in the quad, a small thud as you set your food down beside you.
“Hey, Y/N/N. What’s for lunch?” It was unusually cold today. Clouds covered the usually beaming sun, though little beams of light peeked through every once in a while.
“How can you even think about food right now?“ You fold your hands in your lap, swallowing. You hadn’t eaten all day, but you couldn’t make yourself hungry if you wanted to.
“Actually, there’s something pretty important I want to tell you—“
“Wait. Before you say anything…” you catch his gaze thoughtfully, “how’re you holding up with everything?”
He sighs at that, letting his eyes drift to the ground. “Look, I can’t really flip out at home because of Brenda… but the truth is, inside I’m- I’m flipping out, Y/N/N.” You grab his hand silently, holding it and resting your intertwined fingers on your lap as he continues. “I mean, I know she’s gonna be fine but…”
“Hey, hey… of course she’s gonna be fine.” But then again…
“But then again, there’s always that chance,” his voice is quivering as he swallows, “And I can’t even comprehend it.” You place your free hand over the hand that you’re holding. You sit in silence for a moment, and you think about how you’ve never seen him like this before. Your typically mild-mannered boyfriend’s quiet. He’s vulnerable. He’s scared.
“Brandon, just know that no matter what it is, you can always come talk to me about it.“
"I know… you too, Y/N/N.”  You give him a soft, empathetic smile.
“So, what was it that you wanted to tell me?”
“I’ll tell you later.”
-
“Well, it’s almost been three hours,” Brenda sighs.
“Yeah… yeah, I’m sure she’ll call any minute!” Cindy agrees, chewing mindlessly on her thumbnail.
“And when she does I’ll answer it,” Brenda states, glaring in an accusatory way towards her mother.
“Fine, can I get anybody something to eat?” Cindy jolts up, making you realize how antsy everyone is. You’re tapping your foot as you stand next to Dylan at a hundred miles a minute, Brandon’s been pacing around the couch for twenty minutes, and Jim hasn’t said a word this entire time.
“Doesn’t anyone know any more jokes?” Brenda suggests, eyeing Dylan.
“None that I could tell here… Y/N/N?” Dylan looks to you, but you shake your head.
The doorbell rings, causing Cindy to go careening towards the phone. She whips it up to her ear and shouts impatiently into it.
“Hello?!”
“See, I told you she’d answer it,” Brenda grumbles, going over to the front door. She swings it open as Kelly and Donna walk in, giant gift baskets in hand. “You guys, I’m not dead.” The telephone starts to ring, interrupting Kelly when she opens her mouth to speak. “I’ll get it, I’ll get it, I’ll get it!” Brenda shouts, bolting over to the phone and bringing the antenna up. She lifts it to her ear. “Hello? Yes, this is Brenda… hi, Dr. Donner… Uh-huh…” Oh god. This is it. “Uh-huh!” A grin spreads across her face, “It is?!” You can feel the weight lifting off of your shoulders with pure relief. You quickly send up a collective thank you to any and every god you can think of, just in case. “It’s fibroadenoma, just like she thought. Fairly common in teenage girls due to an abnormally high level of estrogen. I guess my hormones were raging,” she giggles.
“Tell me about it,” Dylan smirks, and Brandon sends his elbow into his stomach at the exact same moment you smack Dylan on the back of the head. “Hey!”
Now, time to tackle your next crisis: the fact that you just bombed your SATs.
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boneseii · 10 years ago
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Wasn't gonna do it tonight but guess who did it anyway
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janersm · 10 years ago
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Does a needle biopsy have anything to do with a needle?
Brenda Walsh, Beverly Hills, 90210 (1x18 - It’s Only a Test)
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girlbythewayside · 11 years ago
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I swear..One thing that'll be nice about high school is that nobody will ever care about your SAT scores again. I hate when there are groups of kids who think so highly of themselves and all they talk about is the SAT and they're all like "yeah I scored 1480, which is great for every school." "I scored 1520, it's above average". When that happens I always have to say "wow, for Math and Critical Reading, that's really high!". It's great to watch their smug faces when they say "no it's our composite scores" and then watch them fall when I say "oh. really? Because I scored 1900". When people do that I can't help but act catty.
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the-daily-90210 · 13 years ago
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Episode 1x18: It's Only A Test
Beverly Hills 90210 - Season 1
Episode 1x18 - It's Only A Test
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My Alternate Title: - "Everybody Is Worried About Brenda's Boobs"
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Quick Recap: Brandon has taken his first steps into the wonderful world of politics. With his moral compass, he should have no problem - he loves telling people how wrong they are about things. Brenda and Dylan are apparently still together, although we haven't heard anything recently. We also haven't seen too much talk about school lately. Tonight's episode will deal with the SAT's.
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Quick Overview: Brenda, Kelly and Donna have some fun performing self breast exams (obviously they each do their own - what kind of show do you think this is??). Brenda is horrified to discover a lump, and then goes through the stresses of getting a biopsy.
This couldn't have happened at a worse time, because while this is all going on everyone is also stressing out about the upcoming SAT's. Andrea - who is completely losing her mind - recruits Steve to help her study (she really must be desperate), and Steve magically decides in the heat of the moment that he is attracted to her. Yeah, I know...WHAT?!?
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Highlights:
-Is this guy talking on a phone with a cord? What is it plugged into? 
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-Now that's what I call a "lap" top. 
-GET A GRIP ANDREA! (Plus kinda bonus Brandon aneurysm face)
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-Holy Crap! Donna has lines in the first five minutes! That must be a new record.
-This would be my reaction to a needle biopsy too. 
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-We weren't crying - it's these damn onions.
-Andrea, stop trying to be so seductive. It's not wor...oh good God, it IS working! 
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-WHHYYY THE HELLLL ARE STEVE AND ANDREA MAKING OUT? 
-Steve, stop trying to be so seductive. It's not wor...oh what the hell, it works for me. ;) 
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-Sorry Dylan, but Brenda having a tumor in her breast is just going to make it that much longer before she puts out. Sucks to be you.
-Awkward post make out encounter. 
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-Man, I didn't get this many flowers and gift baskets when I had my wisdom teeth out. Not fair!
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Lowlights:
-I'm curious as to who those paintings on Kelly’s wall are supposed to represent? 
-I really didn't realize that the SAT's were THAT important.
-Why does it look like Jim is trying one of those breast exams? 
-My "phrase" tally for this episode will be how many times they say "I'm sure it's nothing."
-Cindy's quite dressed up for a doctor's appointment. 
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-Holy Sweet Lord! That's a HUGE needle! 
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-We're up to 7 "It's probably nothing" or "I'm sure it's nothing"
-Oh wait...that's 8...nope 9.
-Good lord, 10!
-Nope, you're not fooling anyone. Saying cancer is "highly unlikely" is basically the same as saying "it's probably nothing."
-30 minutes in and Dylan has finally made an appearance. 
-Brenda is dreaming about lying dead in a coffin in a classroom while everyone else takes the SAT's. Brenda, you don't have to worry about the SAT's...you're dead.
-I know dreams rarely make sense, but why is Cindy taking the SAT's?
-Yeah, I would really want to know that the lump in my breast looked like chewed gum. That would make gum really appealing.
-Of course, in times of great stress Cindy wants to know if anyone wants food.
-"Brenda, are you sleeping?" No Brandon, she's just laying there in the dark with her eyes closed and her head on the pillow. Why do people always ask such stupid questions?
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Favorite Quotations:
Brandon: You know, I was wondering you had been masticating all the pencils around here.
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Brandon: She's probably just recovering from all that studying she did at Kelly's today.
Cindy: Kelly studies? I can't picture it.
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Brenda: I just didn't want you to get upset over nothing.
Jim: I'm not upset.
Brenda: Well, why not?
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Jim: It could be anything. An ingrown hair.
Brenda: An ingrown hair? On my left breast?
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Andrea: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to claw you - I'm just in a desperate position.
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Andrea: [to Steve after they make out] I'm sure you helped my score 200-300 points. I have to go.
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Brandon: You're going to be fine.
Brenda: How do you know that?
Brandon: Because I'm older and wiser.
Brenda: And just how much wisdom did you accumulate in those four minutes?
Brandon: A lifetime.
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What We Learned Today:
...It's Probably Nothing.
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Rating on a Scale of 1-10 (1 being “Go Back To Minnesota”, 10 being “That Was The Greatest Thing Since David Silver's Dancing”):
7.5/10
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