#It'd depend on where you go specifically to say what there is worth seeing
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If one were to visit South Africa, what sites and activities would you recommend? Also, which is safer cash or card?
South Africa is one of the most dangerous countries for crime (especially violent crime), so 100% card. Do not carry cash.
It depends what sort of things you enjoy, but I would recommend visiting the Western Cape what is called "The Garden Route" here. It's the most beautiful part of the country and you can get a LOT of tourist attractions involving our nature. The Garden Route is also along the coast so you can have a choice of visiting Game Parks to get guided tours to see our wildlife including Elephants and lions.
Some parks have Rhinos too but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON'T TELL PEOPLE ON SOCIAL MEDIA WHICH PARKS HAVE THEM AND DO NOT PUT PHOTOS ONLINE!!!!
We recently have an old bull poached because an international tourist couldn't keep their fucking twitter to themselves and HAD to let everybody know which park had a large bull. And that tourist got that animal killed. And yes I am STILL fucking angry about it.
Anyway
Being along the coast you can also get things like charted vessels to go see the whales that come to our shores.
If you go to Cape Town you can also enjoy a lot of the art scenes, visit Table Mountain, visit Robben Island to see where Nelson Mandela was imprisoned, but also you can check out the old Dutch forts and the canon which fires every hour on the hour.
Just be sure to have a VERY good idea of where your GPS is taking you and avoid driving through anywhere that looks dodgy. It would be best to get in touch with a local of some kind who can help you get around in a way that is safe if you are going to any bigger city of any kind.
Do not go to Johannesburg.
#C-Puff answers#I'm sorry I can't be more helpful#It'd depend on where you go specifically to say what there is worth seeing#My country is an ocean of blood and violence with only small islands of comfort
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Me, after doing 15 minutes of excessive googling on every Batfam member's birthday only to then realize I've accidentally missed the majority of them this year, and then also finding out that people are still aggressively debating over whether Bruce's birthday is April 7 or February 19, Dick's birthday happens 3-6x throughout the year, and Stephanie might have just popped into existence for all that DC cares:
Batfam birthday dates btw for anyone who needs them are listed beneath the cut:
DISCLAIMER: DC is notorious for being super inconsistent with everything and I am a mere tadpole caught in the tidal wave of DC's ocean. This post will be regularly updated with edits and corrections so please do not use it as word of law, I am begging you.
Update (8/24/23): To keep things more simple and easier for everyone I am going to start categorizing the birth dates I've collected into 3 categories.
-Most popular: Self-explanatory. These are the birth dates that have been canonized and confirmed by DC and are also more wildly celebrated by the fandom. Typically, this should be the first result you see when you google the character's birthday. But not always because DC sucks ass.
-Other date(s): These are the additional birth dates I come across that have been canonized in some form with multiple sources, but are not as wildly celebrated or popularized by DC and/or the fandom. Why am I including them here? Mostly because I don't want people coming in saying I forgot a date. But also because if I have to see this mess, then y'all have too as well.
-Potential but unconfirmed date(s): This is where I will put all the other additional dates I find, but specifically those that are lacking in complete sources or seem to be highly debated and scrutinized.
Also fun emoji ranking guide for me and me alone:
👑👑: Queen Shit. Characters with a consistent and simple birth date(s). Can absolutely do no wrong.
👑😮💨: In the Running. Characters who don't have a set birth date, but the mess is minor and completely DC's fault. They shouldn't have to be punished for DC's crimes.
🤡🤡: Gtfo. Shit is so inconsistent and stupidly messy that it's making me lose my shit. I'm putting DC and the characters on trial for this bullshit.
👑Alfred Pennyworth👑
Most popular: August 16
Other date(s): April 8 and March 31
(I think it'd be hella cute if Jason and Alfred shared a bday. But if you keep scrolling through the rest of the list, you'll see that August is kind of an overcrowded bday month for the Batfam.
Depending on what you prefer, though, I still think Alfred's worth being celebrated. Lord knows he deserves a special day for himself)
(Update ((8/24/23)): No big inconsistencies between these dates. I just thought it would be fun to provide some info on why Alfred has two canonical birthdates.
So the reason August 16 is viewed as the most popular is for two main reasons. One, obviously, is that he shares a birth date with Jason Todd. So many fans latch onto this date because of how sweet it is for them to share a birthday together.
The second reason has to do with the origin of the birth date. This is because of the more recent retcon that was made by the prequel comic to the Injustice: Gods Among Us video game that was published in 2013. There is a panel in the comic that shows Alfred's birth certificate in full detail from his full name, his place of birth, etc.
As for April 8, this specific date technically has more history compared to August 16. Fans will cite that April 8 was the official date selected by DC according to their Super DC Calendar back in 1976 (which btw was made in 1975).
Compared to August 16 and April 8, however, March 31 oddly enough isn't that popular or recognized by DC or the majority of the fandom. The reason March 31 does come up is because March 31, 1943 was the date when Alfred made his first appearance in the comics, one day after Bruce/Batman)
🤡Bruce Wayne🤡: Hey. Hey, DC, look at me. Bitch.
Most popular: February 19 or April 7
Other date(s): April 25, May 27, March 30, "October," October 7, and "November"
(It looks like most people go with February 19, but don't come at me if you're a April 7 truther. I'm just existing)
(Update ((8/20/23)): I'm gonna shoot somebody. So after doing a little bit more research, I came across-you'd never guess it-even more conflicting info on when Bruce's birthday is supposed to take place.
While April 7 and February 19 are still popular days for fans to celebrate Batman's bday, March 30 is also considered a popular date due to March 30, 1939 being the day Detective Comics #27 ((the issue Batman debuted in)) was put on shelves.
HOWEVER, even Batman's debut is contested to actually be May 27, 1939 because despite the fact that Detective Comics #27 first appeared to the public on March 30, 1939, the cover issue depicted May 27, 1939 instead.
This is because it was a popular practice for comics publication houses to falsify their cover dates as a way to give the impression that the latest issue was newer than it actually was. So if you really, really wanna get super fucking technical about it ((and I know there are some of you out there who do)), Batman may have debuted on March 30, but the cover-issue date was May 27 so, yes, I guess Bruce could have been a May baby instead.
I hate it here.
Oh, and to make matters more complicated, let's discuss the issue of April 7 vs April 25. So the reason April 7 is a popular bday for Bruce is because the original 1930-40s run just outright stated that April 7 was his birthday. Simple enough.
So what does April 25 have to do with this? Well, that's because technically-I think I hate that word now btw-Batman didn't get his own solo comic until April 25, 1940. If you want to go by April 25 because of this logic, however, that means that you'd have to share Bruce's birthday with the Joker. Because guess what? That's also the exact date that the Joker debuted.
I'm personally not a huge fan of Bruce and the Joker sharing a bday. Mostly just because the dates are clearly already complicated enough. But also I feel like April 25 is just known as the Joker's bday at this point, at least in the DC fandom. And Bruce has so many options at this point that it'd be kinda silly to make them share a bday.
As for the "sometime in October" and "sometime in November" additions, we have Batman The Animated Series and Frank Miller's "Batman: Year One" to thank for those extremely vague options.
BTAS Bruce states that his birthday is "sometime in October" and "Batman: Year One" Bruce is responsible for "sometime in November." I repeat: I hate it here.
So when is Bruce's actual birthday? Well, the latest change that DC has "officially" made was the February 19 retcon during the 1970-80s. When a fan sent a question into Detective Comics about Bruce's birthday, the answer given was "February 19" in the letter column. Issue #494, to be exact.
And the reason this answer was given? Because the Super DC Calender for 1976 (again made in 1975) said so.
However, there are still people who prefer to celebrate his bday on April 7 or March 30 instead. And there's also a question floating around if the New 52 run could potentially retcon Bruce's bday AGAIN at some point in the future.
I. Hate. It. Here.
Personally, I liked February 19 because then Alfred could maybe have the month of April to himself. But after seeing all this new info, I'm just sort of resigned to whichever date that the fandom prefers. Y'all can decide. I don't have any energy left.
Also, I can't believe I have to accuse Bruce of having possibly taught Dick his bday scam. Just .... wow).
(Update ((8/24/23)): Well, DC did it to me again. I found this extra little tidbit while googling the Super DC Calendar for Alfred, actually.
So Issue #10 of the 2021 Legends of the Dark Knight decided to give the BTAS's "sometime in October" an actual sometime.
How do I feel about yet another Bruce Wayne bday retcon? Honestly, I think I'm moving closer and closer to just a bland state of acceptance at this point. Tbh, I don't think all these retcons actually matter that much in the end. DC is gonna keep being DC.
Which is annoying. But Idk I'm personally gonna stick with February 19. No shade to you if you prefer any of the other dates. I just like February 19 more than the others)
👑Kate Kane👑
Most popular: March 21
Other date(s): January 26
(So ... where to start to with this one?
Well the official DC canon birth date for Kate Kane is listed as March 21. That being said, if you were to google Kate's birthday right now, you might be confused because that's not the first result that comes up.
Instead, you'll be greeted with January 26, 1990.
So what gives? If there's already an official DC approved birth date, then why the fuck is January 26 coming up all of a sudden?
Well, folks, you have the CW's Batwoman to thank.
Tbh I was very confused as to how I completely missed that there was an entire Batwoman TV show in the first place.
Apparently the show is considered a part of the CW Arrowverse (in reference to the CW show Arrow featuring Oliver Queen, for those of you who need extra info) and ran for 3 whole seasons before being cancelled on April 9, 2022.
And they gave us actual canon lesbian Kate Kane rep. I mean, she is a lesbian. But yeah. CW actually acknowledged her sexual orientation. So kudos for doing the bare minimum?????
Anyway, I guess the showrunners just decided they wanted Kate's birthday to be on January 26 instead of March 21??? Idk if this was supposed to be a reference or an homage to Cassandra Cain's birthday. I doubt it, but who knows?)
🤡Dick Grayson🤡: Greedy bitch who keeps lying about his birthday so he can scam people into giving him more presents jk jk
Most popular: "On the first day of spring" (bruh) or March 20/21
Other date(s): March 6, "April," October 24 (aka "the week before Halloween"), November 11 and December 1
Potential but unconfirmed date(s): June 24
(Dick's canon bday seems to be influx. March 6, March 20, March 21, November 11, June 24, December 1, and so on. I did see multiple sources state Dick was born "on the first day of spring." I'm unclear atm about whether this is a fanon take or if it was actually stated in a particular comic at some point.
As far as I'm concerned, Dick just keeps lying about his birthday for the lols)
(Update ((8/24/23)): Well, guess what I found, folks?
It's a return visit from our favorite friend, the Super DC Calendar of 1976. And according to it, Dick's birthday should be November 11.
You can also thank the Young Justice comic for the confusion surrounding Dick's bday being on December 1.
Also, I found this post by @theflyingwonder that helps clear up a LOT of the mess surrounding Dick's ever changing birth date. Honestly, amazing work and extra kudos to them for putting all the work in and finding all the sources. I just wished I had found their post earlier, holy shit.
And if you have some extra time, please give some love to @inkydandy for their hilarious and very sweet comic about all the confusion that comes with Dick's bday)
(Update ((8/25/23)): Many thanks to @poisoned-ivy for clearing up even more of the mess surrounding Dick's bday. I went ahead and took a screenshot of their response to my old "Which date is Dick's canon bday?" poll.
They also provided a link to the DC Universe Calendar which was lovingly compiled from the original 1976 Super DC Calendar and then put together by the people who run the Five Earths Project .
Also found out from them today that October 24 is one of Dick's bdays ((at least for Post-Crisis Dick Grayson)). So that was a fun new discovery!
They were also very helpful in helping me realize that the original article I had found that stated "sometime in April" was actually in reference to Dick Grayson's first appearance in the comics, which was April 1940.
So, yes, "sometime in April" is technically--again I hate this word so much now--still a valid candidate for Dick's bday. And before you ask: Detective Comics #38 was actually published on March 6, 1940.
Hence why people will cite March 6 as Dick's canon bday instead.
This project got a lot bigger than I ever expected it to ... god)
👑Barbara Gordon👑: September 23
👑Jason Todd👑: August 16
👑Cassandra Cain👑: January 26
👑Tim Drake👑: July 19
👑Stephanie Brown😮💨: She emerged from the void with the sole purpose of dragging Bruce's ass to hell and back. Nothing can stop her. We all exist in her world now.
Potential but unconfirmed date(s): June 23, "August," or August 11
(For real, though, some peeps will say June 23 since the month she officially debuted in the comics was June 1992.
But I've also seen August 1992 listed as her bday month as well--lot of August babies in the Batfam, huh--but I haven't found June 23 specifically listed as her canon bday, either. It honestly feels like the fans are putting in more work than DC at this point. Which, like, I'm not surprised. Just disappointed)
(Update ((8/24/23)): Someone mentioned August 11 as a potential birth date, but I have yet to see an actual source that specifically states this. If I do find one, I'll edit this section. Figured I should put it here just in case, though)
👑Duke Thomas👑: August 13
👑Damian Wayne👑: August 9
👑Terry McGinnis😮💨
Most popular: August 18
Other date(s): June 27 or August 10
Potential but unconfirmed date(s): September 19 (fml)
(Yes, I'm including Terry, fuck you lol
Also SERIOUSLY WTF is up with so many of these August birthdays!!!! Fuck, was everyone just getting crazy BUSY in November!!!! What's going on in the DC universe that is making November of all months the HORNY MONTH????!!!!)
(Mini update ((8/18/23)): Well, I just found out that apparently June 27th 2023 is also a highly debated birth date for Terry. As is August 10 2023/2024 and August 18 2023/2024. I even saw a mention of September 19 2023, but I don't know how credible that source actually is. I'm just putting it here because I'm losing my mind and I don't want someone to pop in and say I forgot it omfg I'm dying
I'm just ... why? Why is it so hard to just commit to one month and one date. I'm not even concerned about the exact year. Just commit to ONE, man.
Excuse me while I march over to DC HQ and burn the whole place to the ground iswtfg)
Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong on any of these. I have a massive headache now and am open to any suggestions or clarifications y'all have to offer.
Also, I'm going to fist fight Dick in a Denny's parking lot.
Update (8/17/23): So a mini post that I meant to use as a way to vent how insane Dick was making me somehow blew up way more than I ever expected it to, and now I feel obligated to clarify again that I am open to any corrections and additional info that anyone has to offer.
I'm saying this because I've noticed people reblogging this post for actual Batfam bday references and someone already pointed out I fucked up Tim's bday and now I feel bad for everyone who reblogged this post prior to that edit.
It's probably just the anxiety talking, but yeah I just wanted to put that out there.
Also justice for Stephanie Brown! She deserves to have her own special day and if I have to bully DC into giving her a canon birthday, then you bet your ass I fucking will.
(And to all of y'all who are encouraging Dick to keep running his side scam business, I just have this to say: There's an empty Denny's parking lot somewhere out there just waiting for you, too lol)
#batfam#batfamily#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#stephanie brown#tim drake#cassandra cain#duke thomas#damian wayne#alfred pennyworth#batman comics#batman meta#batfam meta#long post#long post is long#for real though#if i existed in the dc universe#and i happened to run into either dick grayson or nightwing#it would be on fucking sight#motherfucker gave me an anxiety attack#it's the least of his sins#pinning this post for the time being#terry mcginnis#make sure to double check post for any possible edits or updates#batfam birthdays#kate kane
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omg!!!!! bosch stuff!!!!!!! been a while since i've been on tumblr and it's so nice to see some stuff in the bosch tag for once ^_^ and not only that but a bunch of neat speculation stuff about sf6 and headcanons..... i thank you very much.
can you do one where bosch and avatar go to watch a horror movie together? any kind of horror movie really, though it'd be really interesting to think of what kind of horror he'd be scared of specifically.
bosch stuff! and thank you for the sweet words. sorry for the long wait for your request! I saw you, i swear! it's just taking me a moment to get through everybody. also i love horror/thriller movies, it's the only ones i see in the theater now. i don't really have much hcs for this. art by @komewatari on twitter. also shout out to @corokoro for the body horror one, it was so good i had to include it. maybe you should be a writer too 👀
I think Bosch would be the type to be able to sit through most movies pretty well with the occasional spooks here and there.
He's not afraid of Horror/Thriller comedies and watches them passively from time to time: Scream, Trick 'r Treat, and Ready or Not.
But the genre that does get under his skin are suspenseful ones, like The Strangers or The Conjuring, especially when they drag out the tension.
Bosch also doesn't take too well with overly gory visuals and people screaming bloody murder. So, Terrifier and Sinister are out.
Yes, he knows people are bound to scream because it's a horror movie. But there's something so guttural about the actor's scream that makes the experience much more uncomfortable.
That, mixed with over-the-top gore would give him an upset stomach for a while.
Same thing with body horror. Seeing people and 'monsters' alike twist and contort into inhuman ways makes him sick. Especially if the plot includes some type of possession or parasite.
Depending on your reaction to Horror movies, he'll either force himself to sit through the whole thing or say that he isn't really feeling it.
"Shutter?" Bosch said, holding out the flyer with a confused tone.
"Yeah, it's like the it movie right now. Apparently, it scored high on Rotten Tomatoes." You replied.
"Rotten Tomatoes?"
"You know, the place where the general public gives their reviews to see if something is worth seeing." You took the flyer from him. "Have you seen any scary movies lately?"
"I mean, I've watched a couple at Coach's house, but I haven't gone to an actual movie theater before."
"Oh cool, that means you get to come with me for the viewing in Metro City tonight." Your ears perked up.
"Hang on, I didn't say I was gonna go."
He ended up going.
After running some errands for Coach, Bosch met you in front of the theater.
The neon lights flickered in the early evening, and a line had already formed outside the box office. You were standing near the entrance, a wide smile spreading across your face when you saw him approaching.
"You made it!" you said, practically bouncing on your feet.
"Yeah, yeah, don't make a big deal out of it," Bosch muttered, scratching the back of his head.
Though he couldn't hide the slight smile tugging at his lips.
The two of you got your tickets and headed inside with the smell of popcorn and the buzz of excited chatter filling the air.
You dragged him to get some food before the showing, but he didn't expect almost a whole buffet of different things.
Tubs of candy, Icee machines, ice cream bar, alcoholic beverages, Nachos. He thought you said you were only going to watch a movie, why is there so many things to eat.
"Bosch, taste this."
"Why? It's just popcorn."
"Yeah, but it's different from the homemade ones."
It's definitely buttery, but he doesn't think it's worth spending 15 Zenny on it.
After you two settled in your seats, you pulled out two warm hot dogs you snuck into the theater.
He can't blame you, seeing the prices of some of the foods made him rethink how he should be spending his night.
"Where were you hiding this?" He whispered, holding the warm hotdog you put in his hands.
"I can tell you, but you have to promise to not get mad."
"...I don't know if I want this hotdog anymore."
He would sit through the whole movie with you. And similar to a cat, he could feel the hairs on the back of his neck stick up when a particularly intense scene showed on the screen.
And unless you like floor popcorn, I suggest that you hold the bucket.
All in all, going to the movie theater wasn't that bad.
Maybe pick another genre next time.
"Ugh, how do people enjoy this stuff?" he muttered to himself as you two left the theater
"You alright there, Champ?" You asked with your eyes twinkling in amusement.
"I'm fine," Bosch said. "It's just a movie."
"Just a movie, huh?" You teased. "You looked like you were about to jump out of your seat a couple of times."
"Now you're just seeing things."
"Maybe." You laughed.
When you and Bosch parted ways, he tried to push the movie out of his mind.
He busied himself with mundane tasks, hoping to distract himself.
But when it came time to go to bed, he found himself lying awake with every creak and shadow in the room putting him on edge.
Contemplating what to do next, Bosch heard a ping from his phone.
[You]: Can't sleep, Sweetheart?
[Bosch]: Don't call me that. And no, I can't.
[You]: Maybe, I should've eased you into another movie for the movie theater. I think Shutter was too intense for an introduction. Sorry :(
[Bosch]: It's fine, I'm just trying to pass the time before I fall asleep.
[You]: Do you wanna FaceTime?
[Bosch]: No
[You]: Your loss, but hopefully that shadow peeking over your bedside doesn't get you.
He felt his heart stop as he looked up from his phone.
Seeing nothing he texted:
[Bosch]: I hate you.
Bosch sighed in defeat.
[Bosch]: Fine, but only for little bit.
It was barely 5 seconds before he received the call.
And when he answered, he was greeted with your face staring at him in silence, before you busted out laughing.
"What's so funny?" Bosch asked.
"It looks like you've seen a ghost."
"Don't even start."
"Hehe, I'm just pulling on your tail." You propped yourself up in your bed. "How are you feeling?"
"Good, I guess. I mean as well as I can take a horror movie at night." Bosch leaned back into his pillow.
You both chatted about mundane things that helped ease his mind. Like his plans for tomorrow, battle hub news, new shops that opened up, etc.
He talked to you damn near until the sun rose. And the only reason why you both stopped, was because you had to meet up with one of your Masters tomorrow morning.
"But I wanna keep talking to you." You sleepily mumbled.
"We can talk later when you're not busy. Plus, the sun is about to rise in 30 minutes, didn't you say you had to be there by 8?"
"Ugh, alright, I'll talk to you later then…" It looked like you wanted to say more, but ultimately decided not to.
He sighed, "I love you too."
"But I didn't-"
"That's what you wanted to say, right?"
"I guess my intentions are too obvious." a shy smile playing on your lips.
Bosch chuckled, a soft, affectionate sound. "Maybe, but it's one of the things that I like about you."
"...Goodnight, Bosch." You said, feeling the warmth creep up your chest.
"Night…"
As the call ended, Bosch stared at his phone a beat longer, before tossing it on the nightstand. He covered eyes with his forearm, trying to block any lingering light that seeped into his room.
He tried to at least get a wink of sleep before he got back into his normal routine.
It didn't help that the last thing on his mind was the way you looked at him when he told you he loved you, instead of some stupid scary movie.
#street fighter x reader#bosch x reader#bosch waraya#bosch waraya x reader#sf x reader#sf6 x reader#street fighter bosch#street fighter#street fighter bosch waraya#street fighter 6 x reader#street fighter 6
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on the topic of silver apologizing. do you think there’d ever be a situation in which he’d have to apologize to espio about something serious?
I can think of some situations, yes. Specifically ones wherein Silver's flaws have brought on more trouble than it is worth, or actively put a companion in danger. Silver is very stubborn, smug, and hounds targets down with relentless determination, where it's also really very hard to change his mind in full. And that works great in the Rivals games, because he was right on the money about Eggman Nega there! But I do think that there'd be situations wherein he hears what's going on, immediately decides that This Is The Way Things Are And Thus This Is What I Must Do To Make Things Better For All, and creates a haphazard plan based on solely that before jumping right into the action... which is not exactly how e.g. a detective hired to find the objective truth in a situation would handle things. Basically, I think Silver does not wait to gather all the details of a given situation first to then put them together and see what is most logical: he follows his heart and his desires to make everyone happy. I'm specifically thinking of TSR where he apparently gets the jump on Eggman to interrogate him about the Ultimate Energy Engine, without much in the way of a plan and such. He just comes bursting right in and accuses Eggman about things. And also here, he is right! One thing I like about the games is that Silver is actually just always right in his suspicions, haha. But more realistically speaking, I figure there will be moments where his heart is wrong as well. And when that happens and he's done something dangerous or irreversible in his haste, it'll be a whole issue to fix things again.
That being said, I do think Espio both has patience with him and knows this is something that can happen with Silver's personality at play. In Rivals 2, I would argue Espio fulfils a role of support and stepping in when Silver is not capable of making plans himself: like when Espio makes the decision to steal Sonic and Tails' rings, or when he urges Silver to go find the secret room with Chao in the Mystic Haunt and tells him to not lose hope then. He's not there to dampen Silver's passion, but more funnel it into a productive way that aligns with their goal, if that makes sense? And Silver treats him with respect once they begin to collaborate, plus he is grateful for Espio's help. So, if there is a situation wherein he did something dangerous, I think Espio explaining why Silver did something wrong might be enough to urge Silver into apologising for it. But honestly, I would say Silver's own feelings might play a large role in it as well. Like, I wouldn't say he was disappointed in or upset at himself at all for nearly killing Sonic twice in '06 once he found out he had the wrong guy, for example. He showed sympathy to young Elise's situation, but afterwards just went right on to his next course of action, namely recruit Sonic's help to rescue adult Elise without any form of apology. He truly just kept trucking on for the sake of the future. But in a situation wherein he does feel bad at himself for what happened, it might make it more likely for him to apologise? I find it difficult to say, because I don't get the feeling Silver ever does really feel bad at himself. His confidence in himself and his abilities can be a bit staggering at times, haha.
This got long, but my overall answer would be that it depends on what Silver actually did, the repercussions of that, and how Silver himself feels about it. But considering he's got a good opinion on Espio, having Espio explain what went wrong might be enough to make Silver apologise for causing such troubles, I do feel like. But I doubt it'd be a very lengthy apology; at best, I'd say it's a "sorry" and then just an immediate continuation of their adventure to make things right once more.
#silver the hedgehog#espio the chameleon#if we got the Espilver route... I do think Silver would be rather horrified at himself if his actions got Espio actively hurt or in trouble#I can see him apologise more genuinely and extensively then when Espio is somewhere safe once more#and also with more platonic friendships I doubt Silver would want people to actually get *hurt* by his rashness#I cannot envision him just shrugging that off or telling said friends to man up about it: he cares about them too much#also in such moments I think he might apologise to them and check in on if they truly are okay#if you're not friends with him though? he won't care haha#long post#it's 1 am I should go to bed lol#meanwhile I am having the biggest brain thoughts about how I can incorporate this into New New Beginnings-#-where a sign of Silver's growth could be that he actually genuinely *apologises* for something that went amiss
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Yo yo! How ya doing! Can I ask for Ras going on their ideal date? If you aren't to busy.
a... date? ♪
a/n: hey hey hey anon! even after almost two years i'm still pretty insane about ras ♪ i'm doing pretty well today ! hopefully that doesn't change, thank you for the request ! i... kind of just wrote down their ideal date, but also included how they feel about it ! sorry if anyone or anything's ooc...
she loves singing, so what better place than to sing together at a karaoke bar? even if you're not all that good at singing, sharing what she loves to you sounds wonderful for rei. other than going out, rei's ideal date might be just at home, relaxing with each other by the couch, a cup of warm milk in her hand and you in her embrace (or, her in your embrace, depending on which one you prefer.) doing little things together like cooking a meal or even just talking to each other at the dining table is just as, if not nicer than going out for a walk together around town. getting to spend time with you and indulge in the little things is enough, if not perfect already for her.
something exciting might be what you think masuki would want, but in reality, she's fine with just... hanging out in cute cafes and driving around town with her bike. her ideal date may include going to an arcade and trying your absolute hardest on the claw machine (despite absolutely failing, unless if you do manage to get a plush, she'll treasure it until the end of time), getting some ramen together and talking all day long about the things you like, and driving around town, feeling the wind on her body as you hold onto her waist tightly. i'd think she likes hugs, so this feels even nicer knowing she's getting a hug from her favorite person ever. she likes cute things, and spending time together, so there's nothing better in the world for her than to be with you. it's a 2-in-1 deal! you're cute, and she gets to be with you.
pastel*palettes concert. what more do i have to say about pareo? sharing her true interests with someone she loves so dearly and enjoying it together is truly an ideal date...! both of you passionately cheering, indulging in each other through your love for idols, it really is a dream come true! though, another one of her ideal dates is cute cafes, talking and giggling over the idols and clothes and all the cute things that you two love. being able to share and enjoy what she loves with someone without being shunned or judged is all pareo wants, and to be able to do such a thing with the person she cherishes and loves is all she could ever ask for.
something too grand would (or might?) overwhelm rokka a lot, so don't go too fancy... her ideal date may just be spending time with her, like walking around the mall and pointing to cute clothes or looking at things you or she likes (or both). that includes walking around music stores and eyeing instruments you both can only dream to have (or play). if the shop permits, rokka might even try a guitar out for you, but, in all honesty, she looks stunning no matter which guitar she chooses to pick up. going to arcades, seeing the view from above the mall, and walking each other home... every little part of the date is something she treasures greatly, because she's with the person she loves the most. ...maybe a popipa concert where both of you are cheering and screaming your hearts out is another one of her ideal dates...
she can make any date a reality if she so desired, but i think even just spending time with her is ideal for her. chiyu was lonely before RAS was formed, so even just talking and appreciating her makes her feel... loved and seen. her ideal date may not be anything specific, but i'd guess it'd be going out and trying new things together, like cafe-hopping or checking out what's new in town. she'll get tired easily, due to her solitary lifestyle, but it's so worth it to spend some time with the person who she loves. (she's not admitting that, though!)
#i think i projected a bit for rei back there um ummm im sorry#bandori x reader#bang dream x reader#bandori#request#rei wakana x reader#masuki satou x reader#pareo x reader#rokka asahi x reader#chiyu tamade x reader#chu2 x reader#chu2 bandori#chu2#masuki satou#rei wakana#reona nyubara#reona nyubara x reader#pareo bandori#pareo#rokka asahi#scenarios#raise a suilen x reader
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Have another jewelry psa for you that's kind of an all encompassing, here's everything post from someone that works in coding at a repair depot.
Please don't wear your jewelry into pools, hot tubs, the ocean, etc. The chemicals are bad for your jewelry and can really tarnish silver! If it's a base metal (not gold or silver or brass or even tungsten or stainless steel; i.e., copper), it can not be cleaned and polished or even repaired, so please be careful with it! Oh and especially jewelry with opals in it please be careful getting those wet!
Don't shop at JCPenney.
Stainless Steel is something that's harder to work on and only some jewelry repair depots can do anything with it. This is because of the high melting point and also trying to match the finish on it.
For the love of God don't get tungsten. You cannot size tungsten or repair tungsten at all and it can be very brittle. I had one come in completely shattered and the ticket said it was hit by a basketball.
Don't shop at JCPenney.
I personally don't think hollow jewelry is worth it at all. Specifically earrings. You cannot undent those or do much repairs with them cause yeah they'll just break they're an automatic buyout for us.
For my depot, repairs can take upwards of five weeks, depending on the type of repair. Sizing? Little easier, takes a couple weeks, depending on how much we're Sizing it up or down (if we're taking it from a 7 to 13, it'll take just a little longer to make sure everything's secure). If we have to reshank (this happens when the band of the ring is too thin, meaning it's measuring under .70mm or it's yknow missing the entire bottom half), or replace missing stones (and match it by the color, clarity and size), or anything that's a true repair, it does take a little bit longer and typically is within those 5 weeks unless it's something super heavy and crazy. Custom pieces, where you ask the jewelry to make you a completely new piece, can take at least a month!
Don't shop at JCPenney
Cubic zirconia rings are cheaper than diamonds and I guarantee you they're much prettier go for those.
If your piece of jewelry is causing itchy and red skin, namely if it's white gold or silver, there's a solid chance you have a nickel allergy. Let that be known when you go to send it off and they can plate it differently. It'll still keep that same color but that way it won't cause an allergic reaction.
You can tell what your jewelrys metal type is by looking at the stamp on it! Some examples;
925 - Silver. However, 925 + 1/20 is platinaire and yes it'd confusing because I swear to God, when the stamp starts to wear off, it only ever wears off the + 1/20 and not the 925.
Typically, when it comes to gold, it'll say 10k or 14k (those are the most common I've seen in the U.S., though once in a while I'll see 18k, and I've had one 20k and one 9k). However, and especially on chains, I'll see the 585 for 14k, for example.
SR BR means silver over brass, and just BR is brass. Though sometimes it'll be silver over brass and it'll just say BR.
Don't shop at JCPenney.
You can tell if pearls are real by rubbing them on your teeth. I found this out after I saw our stores owner doing that. Yes it's weird. Real pearls feel rough and gritty, fake ones feel smooth.
Pearls are also a bitch bc if the clasp breaks or anything you have to resting them. Or if they're on a ring or earring and come off, you have to reglue them onto the little spike rather than resetting them and tipping the prongs around them. It's weird as hell to me.
I recommend being careful if you see earrings that have a snap setting. On the sides, they remind me of like tulip seems for some reason and the prongs they have set very flimsily over the earrings and curl over them versus your standard prong that rests against the sides of the stone. They are super fucking frail and will break if you do anything to them repair wise and don't offer really any security for your stones. Below is an example picture but I hope my descriptions pretty apt
DON'T SHOP AT JCPENNEY!!!!!
I have found you can find better sales in department stores than you can on their online site. My ring was marked at 200 but my man's got it for 87 bucks and I've never been more proud.
JCPENNEY JEWELRY IS CHEAP AND IT SUCKS AND THE PROTECTION PLANS ARENT WORTH IT IF YOU'RE NOT SPENDING HUNDREDS OR THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS ON SOMETHING JUST DON'T BOTHER THEY ARE THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE.
If anyone wants to know more jewelry tips please feel free to ask! Or if you have some, add onto this.
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What kinda jobs do you think would the people at Dema have? Especially the ones who work closer with the bishops
There'd probably be multiple layers to their society, depending on how low or high risk one would be when it comes to rebelling against the regime.
I'd say that those allowed to live in the outer rings of Dema are most likely just very standard in nature; the story itself has mostly followed the extremes of society, those fighting against the regime, and those staunchly tightening their fist to retain it, but I feel like SAI showed the middle of what that society looks like.
People have homes, people have jobs. I go back and forth on whether or not they would have some form of currency, but if they it'd be something like those worthless company scrip tokens that were given out out in the 1930s; ones that are only good for dema-approved purchases, in dema-approved stores. All that society knows is what is within it's circular walls.
Still, for society to function, they need people working construction, sanitation, infrastructure; I'd say that those most faithful to the regime are placed in comfortable accommodations; it doesn't so much matter what job you do, but how dedicated you are to the cause, so it appears as though wealth isn't judged by your station, rather your faith. This might seem fair to those within the society, especially one so brainwashed to believe that their only worth is their servitude to the bishops and to vialism, but... It's clear from the outside how fucked up it all is.
Clancy speaks in his letters specifically of serving their bishops faithfully, and feeling a sense of pride to work for Keons before his awakening. I believe that many don't even work for some kind of payment, simply because it's what they were assigned by their beloved architects of their city, and so they carry it out without question...
I'd say that identified high-risk individuals would be watched closely, however. It's shown in NATN, that captured banditos specifically are taken to some kind of compound or re-education centre. They likely are forced to stay there, imprisoned until they are to either be used to "better society"... Or to be disposed of.
Children wearing grey are also present there, and that could be for a number of reasons;
Their parents are known defectors, or the children themselves are seen as "problem children" and are placed in the re-education system
The compound itself is where the new generation of dema citizens receive their first doses of soul-crushing propagandistic education, where they learn the ways of vialism and living in dema
Or, most chillingly, the children were intended to be placed into vials at the age they were at. (I see this one as a personal headcanon that would make dema even more terrible, but I also don't see it likely as at the vialism ceremonies, adults are the only ones present)
The education system would probably ferry these children into their assigned roles, their assigned lives. The bishops would likely have an intricate interconnected system, which takes into account the purposes of all of their test subjects; Once a child is suitably prepared for the life assigned to them, they're placed in one of the districts that requires their service. They likely stay in this job until they die, however, occasionally if their purposes are required elsewhere, they will be reassigned. There's no applying for other purposes, no choice in what they do or where they go, if they're separated from those they love... Wherever their bishop assigns them, they must go. Often, children who are placed in this system and end up in different districts are separated completely. This is just a quirk of the system, as the city is large, and they never know where their friends have gone; all they know is where they've been placed, their purpose, and their given name.
On the most inner circle of dema, are the most trusted advisors and the highest security level criminals. Criminals are kept in aforementioned compounds for sentencing, be it re-education, as bargaining chips agains the rebellion, or to be placed in vials. Even the prisoners, in the mind of Dema's elite and it's citizens, all have a purpose, how nice.
I doubt the bishops would often allow anyone close to them, or their plans. They may allow SOME close advisors and community leaders, but seem to coordinate everything themselves; Though, for whatever reason... Have specific interest in Tyler himself, for the strange power he holds. They also somewhat had/have this specific interest in Clancy, at least Keons did/does, likely because he was/is so deeply interwoven with the banditos, that he was/is a person of interest to them.
But who can know for sure.
#twenty one pilots#tøp#mine#letters#ok but talking about the intricacies of dema infrastructure and society is fun af#basing a lot of these off of what I know about actual dictatorships soooo#sfw#lorewhore
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Now let's take a stroll through the dark academia of your mind, shall we? I'd like to know about: arcane, journal, architecture, candlelight, and charcoal, if any of these aren't a bother.
arcane— what character in any piece of media do you relate to strongly?
Relate to? That's... a really hard thing to figure out, honestly. I'm not sure I can think of one, off the top of my head. There's a lot of characters I've wanted to be, to travel in their roles, but I've never quite found a story where the character reminds me a lot of myself.
journal— what does your handwriting look like? do you like it?
Let's put it this way, judging by my handwriting you'd understand why I wanted to go be a doctor. Once people knew that, nobody ever asked questions when seeing me write with a pencil or pen. If I put my mind to it, I can keep it legible, though. As far as if I like it, I have to admit I wish I had pretty handwriting.
architecture— would you rather visit a museum or see a movie in theater?
Both have their own charm, and I think a lot of it depends on the day and circumstance. Which museum? Which movie? With who? Or am I by myself? It's such a varied answer with so many specific details missing from the question, I honestly have to keep it at a 'both'.
candlelight— what is your favorite book, if any, and why?
Okay, I get it, I know what you're thinking. And yes, it's up there, it's in the running. You know the dorky idiot I love.
However, if I think of a book that's been with me forever, I've gotta say The Dragonriders of Pern. It was probably the first book I wrote anything for, even as RP stuff. Gosh I loved it then, I love it now, it's such a fascinating world of sci-fi and fantasy.
charcoal— if you could tell your past self one thing, what would you tell them? why?
Oh boy. If I had to go back and tell one past iteration of me something, it'd be me in fifth grade. I'd tell her that she's right to not go through with what she thought to do. That it'd get so much better, even when it's hard and sucks ass. She'll meet so many good friends, she'll be a best man for a friend like no other. She'll have a family spanning the world. She might even save a life or two through love alone. It's worth gritting her teeth, that this too will heal into scars that start to fade.
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Metanoia | ch. six
cw: bruises, guns, drvgs (don’t be surprised), s/a
word count: 1.6k
a.n. this one is angsty..
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Jin spends the following morning running over safety protocols while tending to my neck in his bathroom. Not once does he mention the events of last night. He's very focused on moving on. He only looks at my bruises, never my eyes that are staring directly at him.
He dabs a witch hazel soaked cotton ball on my neck. I hiss at the light sting.
"I'm supposed to be mad at you for what you said last night. JK's pissed," He warns, "I'm surprised he didn't kill you. Must like you enough to keep you alive."
"He's an arrogant asshole." I mumble.
"I know. We all know."
"Then why do you continue to work for him."
Jin squeezes some aloe vera on his forefinger and pats the gel on my neck.
"We'll die if we don't. And so will you."
I've really roped myself into some shit with agreeing to this. It's a suicide mission no matter what I do. But if I survive, my life could be everything I've dreamed of. I'm discovering that it's not worth the risk, but if I remember Tae, then I can persevere.
"That's the best I can get it for now. We have to heal it before we leave. So don't say anymore stupid shit," Jin says, "Today you're doing target practice with Lucas. It could take all day depending on how much you suck. You shouldn't run into JK today, there's a shipment coming in so he and Jennie will be busy with that."
"What about you?"
"Me? I gotta put your name on this guys guest list for the party he's hosting."
"Who is this man by the way? I'm being trained to kill him and I don't even know who he is."
Jin inhales a sharp breath and leans against the bathroom countertop.
"He goes by Agust D, nobody knows his real name. He comes from a long line of infamous druglords. He could quit right now and his great, great grandchildren can still be rich," Jin starts, "That's why JK wants his head. He started out as a dealer from age fifteen. Started killing his bosses, stealing their assets. Agust is just the next kill. The last one I assume."
"Is he scary?" I let a little bit of weakness show, I can't help it. If I were going to be vulnerable around anyone here it'd be Jin.
"Honestly, yeah. But his scary isn't as upfront as JK. JK will choke you half to death no hesitation. But Agust will entertain your views, play with you a bit before he snaps your neck. Kinda like you."
"Me?"
"Trust is your best weapon, right? You may notice your own game being played against you."
"That's terrifying." I admit.
"It doesn't have to be," He says as he leads me out of the bathroom and to the front door where Lucas is waiting, "It could be fun."
Lucas drives a low red sports car. I'm surprised his tall legs can fit since even I'm having trouble getting into the car. It races through the city until we get to this old, abandoned house. Only, when we get out and walk into the house, I discover that it's not abandoned.
It's dimly lit, but I can still make out that there are people counting money and packing all kinds of drugs. I recognize some, others I don't. I even spot Jennie, the pretty woman from last night, walking around the main floor and supervising.
"Hey, what're you doing here? You know JK's coming in today."
Fuck. Jin specifically told me that I wouldn't see him.
"We'll just be in the basement. Target practice." Lucas says.
"I'll try to keep him upstairs. But there's only so much I can do."
"Thanks, let's go, Jimin."
The basement is pretty dark too. I see two walls of countless guns and a table of knives. Lucas grabs two small hand guns and gives one to me.
"Have you ever shot a gun before?"
"No."
"Jesus... This'll take forever," He grimaces, "Okay, undo the top see if it's loaded."
I do as he says and it looks like all six bullets are in place.
"Now pop the safety latch," We both perform this, "Now you're ready."
He walks forward a bit more and clicks on another light that reveals human standees that already look mutilated beyond repair. Some with knives thrown at their legs others with holes directly through their skulls.
"Okay. Aim for the closest one. Aim anywhere on his body." Lucas instructs.
I point the gun at the standee and reposition a few times.
"Shoot." He shouts.
And I do, stepping back at the guns impact and watching the bullet graze the hand of the stand.
"Considering your target is the biggest druglord in Daegu, you need to be quick when you kill him," Lucas says, "So even if you don't know where you're shooting, you have to shoot or he'll shoot you first... Try again. This one."
I point the gun at the heart, align the target for a millisecond before shooting. It lands in the stomach.
"Better. Now try two shots in a row. One for the shock. One for the kill. That one in the second row."
I aim for the head and shoot. Then the throat. It's not perfectly centered but it's there.
"Plant your feet flat on the floor, shoulders width apart, like this," He shoots the same standee I shot, landing straight in the middle. "Try it."
And I do, taking a risk and going for the farthest one. One to the head, one to the throat. Right in the middle.
"Perfect," Lucas says, "Now let's do it a hundred more times."
We chuckle as he grabs more bullets to reload my gun. But we stop when we hear footsteps coming closer. I turn around to see JK and Jennie coming down the stairs. Jennie mouths the words "I'm sorry" then goes back upstairs.
"Ah, Lucas. Training the boy toy, I see." He says, hopping off the steps and walking towards us.
He looks different today than he did last night. Less animal print and notable textures, he wears solid cottons and loose pants. Something Taehyung might wear only more expensive.
"Yeah, he's gonna be a real threat by the end of this."
"Well I'd hope so," He sneers, "Leave us."
Lucas passes a glance at me and slips upstairs rather quickly, taking any oxygen that was left down here with him. I set the gun on the table before he has to ask me to.
"Man, I really hope I won't have to kill you."
"Why would you have to kill me?"
He chuckles in a hush tone that makes me shiver as he steps closer to me.
"There's a million reasons. Some as small as not liking your outfit. Or something as big as betraying my trust. Depends on the day."
I bite back a rude remark, saving my body the pain it may face from him.
"I wanted to kill you last night. But I figured hurting you would bring me more pleasure," He groaned, "Jimin, you were hot before, but with those bruises? Oh, you really turn me on."
He creeps closer and I shift backwards, keeping the space between us wide. I back into a wall and he meets me.
"I-I have a boyfriend." I stutter, making it sound like a white lie.
"I know. The sleepwalker? I bet he'll be dead before you make it back."
I want to strangle him. Just wrap my fingers around his throat and squeeze until he turns blue. Referring to my boyfriend as a sleepwalker?
"That's a low blow for a drug dealer, dontcha think?"
"I guess so. If he dies, I lose a customer." He smiles sickeningly, that fucking lip ring spinning in place.
"He is not your customer. He will never be."
"Oh yeah?" He asked rhetorically as he drew a small bag from his pocket. He held it in front of my face. Taehyung's name and our address was written on it. Only it's a bigger supply than we usually get. "You really don't know where it comes from?"
"He didn't order that much did he?" A panicked question comes out.
"Oh, of course not. He could never afford it. This is a little extra. A thank you, if you will, for letting his boy toy help me out."
I blink at the man. Taehyung shouldn't have that much without proper supervision, my supervision.
"Please don't. Send him money, food, even cigarettes. Just please, anything but heroin."
"I don't know, boy toy, he might need it after he finds out you cheated on him."
"But I didn't cheat on him."
JK snakes his hand around my neck again. This time his index finger and thumb work together to control my head. He doesn't choke me like last night, but rather holds me in place while his other hand traces my thigh. His hungry lips pounce on mine, hand tugging at my belt loops.
If I fight back I fear he'll hurt me even more. I remain unresponsive as he touches me. Maybe it'll stop sooner if I pretend it's not happening.
But when his hand curls around toward my back, I press up against the wall so he can't slip through. That's when he bites hard on my neck, causing me to buck up my hips toward him. He kisses deeper and I don't react. I hold my breath as he makes use of my lips.
"Yeah, you did." He smirks before letting go of me, letting me breathe again.
He walks away and up the stairs. Lucas comes down shortly after.
"Ready?" He asks, handing me my discarded hand gun from the table.
I nod quietly and aim for another far off standee. I shoot for the heart, pull the trigger six times until a hole is burned through.
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honestly instead of the clementine comics i really wish we'd gotten a visual novel instead. like, something i wish we got to see more of in twdg is characters (especially clementine) actually talking abt their past/trauma. due to the plot and well, just the gameplay in general of twdg, you cant really fit in resolution of character-based conflict. the conflict IS the titular walking dead. twdg's about making decisions to alter a greater plot, not sorting through the individual pieces of that plot's feelings. but a visual novel, a game thats basically words n pretty pictures, i feel like is the perfect kind of game for looking inward at the characters instead of outwards at a greater threat.
i feel like plot progression wise the end of s4 would be the perfect time for character exploration as well, specifically clementine's. s4 ends off with clementine recovering from an amputated leg, she's not yet well or mobile enough to start going out on her own. for now, she's settling down. there's no big bad or external conflict for her to deal with, this is a period of time focused on her and her recovery. it just seems like a no-brainer to me that if clementine were to start talking about herself more openly, it would be now.
and i've been analyzing this idea in a very clem-specific lens but i also really wanna see exploration of the rest of ericson's too. violet has major abandonment issues, louis has low self worth, aj. and (determinately) tenn also has his own things he's working with. you see the sort of beginning of all of these arcs at the end scene in s4, but i think it'd be super cool to see them more fleshed out you know? maybe most people wouldn't wanna play a game thats essentially just trauma rehabilitation simulator but i would personally and i wish that's what we got instead of the character exploration the clementine comic tries and fails to be.
BECAUSE its just like. theres SO much to talk about you know?? depending on what route you took or what choices you made so many different traumatizing things happened. and not even just in s4 alone, the ericsons kids and clementine already have baggage and things they never worked through and now clementine finally has a space where she can be open which maybe encourages the ercisons kids to start talking too and just *$&*&*%^%&#^&$* i want walking dead therapy simulator damnit
gahh i wanna keep typing because i have more to say but?? idk i feel like it'd be redundant at this point. rambling unscripted for an hour is easy, typing the exact same points into a tumblr post is hard ;_; tldr i love the ericsons kids i love twdg i love you twdg fans please interact
#twdg#the walking dead game#twdg s4#twdg spoilers#clementine twdg#SORRY IF THESE TAGS R. A LOT OR CRINGE I JUST RLLY WANT PPL TO READ MY DUMB LITTLE THOUGHTS...#me speaks
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Okay this is really interesting.
To begin with Chihaya. What I understood, and correct me if I'm wrong. You like or prefer them not ending up together because you like the idea of a case where even if romantic feelings are rejected, a strong and close friendship can still flourish despite that.
I like the idea but I'm afraid at this point in the manga it's hard to execute well because... well the obvious question is do you think he still has feelings for her?
Depending on the answer the scenario can be good or bad. Like, I remember someone asking him that question and him saying that his feelings are fading away. Do you believe that?
I personally don't. I still think he has the same strong feelings. That why I'm skeptical about the close friendship. Like sure the idea is nice but it would not be good for him at all. Close friendship with someone who you have strong romantic feelings for but does not reciprocate is agonizing. And remaining close to them can instead of allowing him to get over those feelings can make things much worse. I don't see a close friendship in those circumstances ending up being a positive influence on either.
Now if you believe that his feelings are gone or are fading away then, while strong and close friendship runs the risk of rekindling those feelings, at least it's possible to have strong healthy friendship under those circumstances.
What's your opinion on this?
Now when it comes to Arata. I think he made a lot of progress. I think he found it in himself to be truly supportive and loving friend to him with no feelings of bitterness or ill will. But I think there is still an underlying feeling of inferiority that has not left. That's what the whole "it's not in my place to be there, there's nothing I can do for them" thing comes from. It could be just a defense mechanism that makes him think that because it'd kinda hurt seeing them share that stage while he couldn't, but eother way it still betrays a sense of inferiority.
Thing is though I get that going there to cheer them on can both make him realize that yeah his support is needed and appreciated and also can help by getting him to selflessly support people he care about without a sense of inferiority and possible biterness.
But I think whether those final moments of closure can help him decide to keep playing Karuta and find self worth, I'd much prefer if that happened in the process of playing Karuta, not outside of it. When it comes to his relationship to either Chihaya or Arata, if we were going the route you prefer, in which he both continues to play Karuta and is able to have healthy and close friendship with both Arata and Chihaya despite rejection by chihaya and loss to Arata, I'd much prefer it expressed through Karuta matches/competition, preferably against each other. I woulda hoped we got to see him get a point where he is able to play against both (again even if he loses or rejected) earnestly and enjoyably and without all the baggage and insecurities that he attached to the game. I think that can solidify the idea of him chosing to continue to play Karuta by literally seeing him do it enjoyably and free of the previous pressures, much more than him deciding by either supporting them in the final matches or telling us through conversation.
What so you think?
With regards to the “fading away” scene, I think I’m half-and-half; maybe a better way to describe it would be to illustrate what to me is a distinction between loving someone and being in love with them. I think Taichi is always going to love Chihaya, very deeply. That’s a love that’s grown since they were kids, and given the degree of importance that she holds for him, I don’t think it’s possible for him to just “stop” loving her and suddenly feel apathetic. That would feel more robotic and perhaps even unhealthy, because shutting down your emotions so abruptly doesn’t necessarily help you process or move on from them. But while I do think he’s always going to love her, regardless, I don’t think he’s necessarily “in” love with her anymore. He seems pretty close to accepting that a romance between them isn’t going to happen, and I think he’s in the process of making his peace with that, especially with the idea that loving her was still worth it even if she ultimately didn’t reciprocate (which is something that I had discussed earlier when I was talking about his conversation with Chitose). As for whether maintaining a close friendship with her despite the lack of reciprocation is feasible, I guess I don’t feel too skeptical because I’ve seen it executed well in other stories. I think I’ve mentioned it before, but Honey and Clover is a great example of a series that depicts unrequited love characters don’t have to remain feeling bitter about, because maintenance of their friendships is what matters most to them. They don’t want to lose these people who have changed their lives and whose presence in their lives matters so much just because their feelings weren’t reciprocated. And to be fair, I understand Taichi is sort of a special case because his friendship with Chihaya is deeply entrenched in his romantic feelings for her to begin with, and that in turn became entangled with many of his insecurities. But to me the fact that he’s working to address those insecurities and shed himself of them implies that he can reach a place mentally where he’s still able to maintain and value his friendship with her without allowing the regrets to overshadow any of that. I don’t think it’s going to be an easy process per se, nor one that’s neatly wrapped up with a bow on top by the end of the story, but so long as we’re shown that he’s moving in that direction mentally and emotionally, I think it’ll give the feeling of, “They’ll turn out okay, so long as they trust themselves and each other.” I can definitely understand if people are skeptical of such a mindset, because everyone is different, and some people handle this kind of situation better than others. Maybe it’s idealistic of me to hope that the positive outcome will be the case for Taichi and Chihaya; but I do desperately want it if he really doesn’t end up with her, because it would feel like such a shame to lose all of that history and support and care between them to only more and more distance. Even if I don’t ship them romantically, their relationship is super important to me and I don’t want to see them have to lose it just because the way they love each other is a bit different. Not to mention there’s still so much they have to actually sit down and talk to each other about, because they’ve kind of ran in circles around each other for the longest time, so I’d like to know that those conversations are going to happen and that we’re not just going to see them progressively distance themselves from each other even more under the guise of “moving on”.
As for your second point, I honestly agree! Although it would be plenty impactful just to see Taichi resolve to continue playing karuta, it would be even more fulfilling if we got to see the manifestation of that decision in him physically playing against Arata (and/or Chihaya) once again. And I’m hoping we do see something like it before the very end, maybe not in the form of a huge time skip (lest it feel like a cop out to readers, lol) but just by the fact of them playing each other again at all. Maybe the series ends on a beautiful spread where the three of them are all playing on the same stage the following year, but we don’t know the specifics of the match. Or maybe the series ends on us seeing them play together again in the Shiranami Society, with the implication that they’ve finally made their way back to each other and are training and fighting together in a way they never have before. There’s lots of possibilities! I do hope we get to see them all playing together in some fashion before the end, though.
#mashima taichi#taichihaya#taichihayarata#chihayafuru#*meta#like ig i sometimes get the feeling#that people in fandom think if someone ships one of the ships it means they don't care about the odd one out#or that they don't care about the other dynamic#but at least for me i still really care about every dynamic within the trio#like even before romance is a plausibility i just want all of them to be okay with each other#and it's hard for me to imagine a scenario where two of them are together while the other one is just nonexistent#they're all so mutually obsessed with each other i don't ever think they're going to really be apart#or if they did end up apart for an even more prolonged period of time#i think it would at the least really pain them#but that’s something that we Already see#esp from chihaya’s perspective#so that’s why i feel like that friendship resolution between the three of them is implied to be reached soon#not necessarily a super short neat resolution#but at least a commitment to it esp since they’re all going to be in tokyo together
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no pressure if you're busy but i was wondering - is titans good? or is it more a show where you're like it's not /good/ but i like it? i thought it looked interesting but then everyone was so negative about it i kind of got put off. And then your (really excellent btw) video resparked why i thought it'd be interesting to watch in the first place. thanks!
I haven’t paid a ton of attention to what fans have said about Titans, although I’m aware that there’s a general negative vibe around it. I suspect that whether Titans is worth watching for you depends a whole lot on what you want out of Titans.
I went into the show having never read a DC comic in my life. I was coming off of a week-long Wikipedia binge on Batman and his associated characters��the Robins, the Batgirls, some dude named Signal—and was talking to @thirdblindmouse about how it had become overwhelmingly clear to me that we’ve been doing Batman all wrong for decades, and the way to tell the story is as an ensemble family drama about intergenerational trauma. And she was like, “Uh, have you seen Titans?” So all of my pre-existing understanding of the characters comes from Google and selected comics scans.
I suspect that the show’s interpretation of Dick Grayson, in particular, is... skewed? I’m almost certain, based on scans of comics I’ve seen/the half a season of Teen Titans I watched a lifetime ago, that its interpretation of Starfire is highly nontraditional. There are certain storylines that I know they’re adapting, but like, they are playing very loose with the adaptation of even some of the characters’ basic personalities. (I’m pretty sure—again, not really a DC comics fan!)
So if you’re very committed to a generally cheerful Dick Grayson, Titans will not give you that. If you have a vision of Batman as a generally decent man, Titans will really not give you that. In general, I think that the show would be better if it erred more towards a lighter tone for Dick—there are moments where he has shades of Quentin in season three of The Magicians, when Q was kind of endearingly hapless, and the show is better for it. But I think it earns its ambivalent stance on Batman, and uses it well. Batman in Titans looks and acts like your dad whose office you’re not allowed into. And Titans!Starfire is really amazing. Like, Anna-Diop-is-a-revelation, fuck-now-you’ve-got-me-shipping-against-my-will amazing.
The bigger issue that Titans has—and this is not unrelated to Dick’s characterization, I guess—is its relationship with violence. Titans is a really violent show, especially in its first season, and it’s off-putting. Pretty much every superhero show involves the heroes beating up bad guys; not every superhero show involves the protagonist mutilating someone in the course of a fight.
This is not unthinking hyperviolence. Titans (which is actually annoyingly pretty good about tracking character through action sequences) is trying to make a point: The compounding traumas of Dick’s childhood resulted in an explosion of rage. Batman funneled his anger into Dick; Dick funnels his anger into whatever bad guy he’s fighting. The show isn’t subtle about this idea. Dick says it out loud several times. Nor (after the first fight) does the show endorse Dick’s over-the-top violence. Everyone from Donna Troy to Dick himself remarks on it with, at minimum, concern. And over time, Dick’s fighting style changes; he consciously leaves the hyperviolence behind, until his final fight of season two is primarily evasive.
But Dick is not the only Titans character who is working out his rage on the criminals he apprehends, and the show is considerably less coherent in its tonal approach to other characters’ violence. Hank and Dawn—the masked hero team Hawk and Dove—have an origin story that plays out like the the backstory of a serial killer couple, their interlocking trauma and rage and grief finding expression and acceptance in each other. The show is aware of the dynamic, but it’s not clear that it’s aware of how disturbing it is. Hank and Dawn are, primarily, people who need to cause violence in order to be at peace in their own heads—and only secondarily, people who want to protect others from danger. Season two does do some work exploring this idea, but the exploration is confused by the fact that, in the end, the show wants both of them on the cast.
Which is kind of the problem with any superhero show that sets out to explore the ethics of superheroism—at the end of the day, the characters aren’t gonna retire to Wisconsin, you know? So Titans presents hyperviolence, presents it as problematic (sometimes), presents it as almost an inevitable consequence of traumatized teenagers deciding to pursue vigilante justice... and then builds a superhero team of traumatized teenagers and young adults. As is its basic conceit.
And on a more fundamental level, the hyperviolence just sort of makes the show feel very grim. It’s already an aesthetically dark show, a lot of the time, and then you’ve got people getting mutilated, and Batman’s an asshole and Dick Grayson’s got anger management issues, and it feels like the show’s grimdark.
I don’t think it is, though. First of all, despite everything, Titans actually has a sense of humor, both in general and occasionally about itself—I mean, it’s not Legends of Tomorrow, but it understands how to crack a smile every now and then. (They have a superdog. He shoots lasers out of his eyes!) But more importantly, at the end of the day, Titans is hopeful. Yeah, it’s a show about anger and violence and intergenerational trauma—but it’s more specifically about moving beyond those things. At its heart, it’s about being a better parent to your children than your parents were to you.
That central relationship between Dick and Rachel—Dick trying, and sometimes failing, but always caring and trying to be better for Rachel, and Rachel’s absolute fury with him when he fails, but her unshakeable devotion to him for being there, the unbelievable amount of sway he holds in her world—that’s what makes the show work for me. There are other vital relationships, too—Rachel and Kory, especially, but also all of the pseudo-familial relationships built up between all of the characters—but it all comes back to Dick and Rachel.
I mean, it’s a found family show. So much so that in season two, there are like, three separate speeches about how this is a family, not one of those stupid biological families, but a family we found, and isn’t that the important kind? And how grimdark can a found family show really be?
The other thing that might throw some people off—but which is actually one of my favorite things about the show—is the structure. If you take a look at the Titans episode list, you’ll see that roughly 75 percent of the episodes are named after a character or characters. Season one of Titans is basically about Dick, Starfire, Gar, and Rachel (Raven from the comics) traveling the midwest, picking up the people who will eventually form the main Titans team. When they encounter those people, they get a spotlight episode. So in episode two, “Hawk and Dove,” when Dick and Rachel lay low at Hank and Dawn’s, the episode starts out with an extended cold open, entirely disconnected from the main characters, just introducing us to Hank and Dawn as characters. Episode eight, “Donna Troy,” sees Dick go to visit his old friend Donna in Milwaukee, and... basically just hang out with her for half the episode, while the rest of the cast does plot stuff. Occasionally, these spotlight episodes stop the plot completely: Towards the end of season one, an episode ends on a cliffhanger. the next episode, rather than showing the outcome of the cliffhanger, is “Hank and Dawn,” an episode that flashes back to show the story of how Hank and Dawn met and became masked heroes. (There’s an in-episode device that eventually makes it clear why this story is related to the cliffhanger.) Season two uses the cliffhanger-into-a-flashback-spotlight-episode structure two more times, once with a character we’ve never met before.
I can see this being deeply frustrating to a viewer watching week-by-week (and I would not recommend watching Titans in that manner). And it’s certainly an unconventional way to structure a season of television. But honestly? I think it’s half of what I like about the show. The spotlight and flashback episodes are good—often some of the best the show’s produced. They don’t stop the plot for no reason; in season two, in particular, they provide context and backstory and characterization in a way that would be almost impossible to do, or to do so well, without the space of a full episode. They make the show more episodic than it would otherwise be—always a joy, in a television landscape full of 10-hour movies—and give it space to experiment with tone and genre. They make the characters richer, and the relationships more complex.
Does it slow down the plot? Absolutely. But Titans is not overflowing with complex plot, and I don’t really think it should try to. The plot of Titans hangs together juuuuuuuust enough to make the themes and characters and relationships work. It’s coherent—we’re not talking Teen Wolf, here—but it’s not brilliant, and honestly, that’s fine by me. But I suppose if you want your plot to be really good, this may not be the show for you.
Finally, I’ll say that Titans, though not what I would call a feminist show (it has a primarily male writing staff and I think it shows) does have a kind of surprisingly large female cast? I wanna say it’s five men, five women, by the end of season two? (Yeah, it’s a fucking enormous cast.) And the women have actual relationships with each other, ones that the show puts some effort into maintaining and remembering. I realize this is damning with faint praise, but honestly I’d just expected a show like Titans to not do that, and was prepared to ignore it, and was kind of pleasantly surprised when I didn’t have to.
In summary: I told my sister that Titans is 10% men in spandex standing on cars, 30% team as family, 30% intergenerational trauma, 20% an uncomfortable relationship with is own hyperviolence, and 10% Krypto the Superdog. I think that tracks. That show, despite having Anna Diop’s glowing presence, has a lot of flaws, but it also really worked for me on some soul-deep level. I am exactly on its wavelength.
I do not think that Titans is a fantastic television show, but I also don’t think it’s a very bad one. I think it’s generally competent show that is very interesting in some aspects, is weak in some areas, falls prey to some inherent trappings of its genre, is thoughtful about familial trauma, is not thoughtful enough about violence and criminal justice, has a lot of very compelling performances, is really poorly lit a lot of the time, pays a lot of attention to its visual language, kind of thinks Batman’s an asshole, and has Krypto the Superdog. It really worked for me; I can see why others might not be into it; it might work for you!
#thank you for giving me this opportunity to talk about titans#a show that has EATEN MY BRAIN#titans#meta
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It'd be nice to see sort of a "Creole for beginners" post that talks about what terms are common in Vodou and maybe explains the grammar structure. I've noticed a lot of Creole I can mentally translate myself if I think about it long enough since many French words were taken into English awhile back, but French itself I don't actually know so sometimes it's quite a reach. The evolution of the language seems parallel with the evolution of Vodou and that's really interesting to me.
So, this ask has been sitting for awhile, and I’ve been thinking about it a lot as I am just finishing up an intensive month-long Kreyòl class.
Haitian Kreyòl/Kreyòl Ayisyen is a fascinating, gorgeous, succulent language. In some ways, it is super straightforward and in other ways, it is deeply complex as befits a language that has roots in Romance languages (more than one!), African languages (more than one!), and Indigenous languages. Like vodou, it is a language that embodies the history of Haiti and it has and does evolve as culture and the world advances.
Outside of Haiti, there is the idea that there is no common orthography/common way of speaking and utilizing the language. This is wrong wrong wrong. Largely, this stems from the fact that, until about 50 years ago, Kreyòl was almost entirely an oral only language because of colonialism–Kreyòl has only begun being taught in schools in the last decade, yet almost every Haitian speaks it fluently (the elite class speaks French, but that is largely a class marker–everyone knows Kreyòl). Many Haitians do not know how to write in Kreyòl, and write the best that they are able which leads to widely varied output….which leads outsiders to say that there is no commonly accepted orthography.
It would take a long, LONG time to really deconstruct and explain how Kreyòl works in practice so I’m not going to go there entirely, but here are some basics:
Kreyòl has 32 letter/symbols in its alphabet. Within that, there are 15 vowels/vowel sounds and 18 consonants/consonant sounds. Kreyòl only utilizes one accent (grave accent/aksan grav). Things with the alphabet that trip up Kreyòl learners who are native English speakers include:
‘C’ is not utilized except as a compound sound in ‘ch’, which is a soft sound like ‘shh’ and not a hard sound like ‘chair’.
‘U’ is not utilized except in compound sounds with other vowels.
‘G’ is always hard, never soft.
In Kreyòl, everything written is spoken–there are no silent letters, ever. A professor of mine terms Kreyòl as a truly democratic language; every letter has a sound that is expressed orally.
Basic sentence structure is Subject-Verb-Object (Li se yon bèl fi/She is a beautiful woman) and Noun-Adjective (Li bèl/She is beautiful). Within that structure:
Tenses and conditions (positive/negation) are assigned by separate verb markers/particles. Absense of a verb marker makes the tense automatically present.
Verbs largely do not conjugate, with some exceptions.
Articles are placed separately from the noun–definite articles are ALWAYS after the noun, indefinite articles are ALWAYS before the noun, and this gives speakers of other languages fits because it is different than the Romance languages most closely related to Kreyòl (my class had several folks who spoke several European-derived languages fluently, and the folks who spoke French or Spanish fluently struggled the most).
Adjectives are mostly after nouns, except when they are not.
Kreyòl is a language of double speak, both in general and in vodou. Words carry multiple meanings depending on context and tone, which can be a struggle when learning and can lead to confusion and sometimes awkward conversation. For example, the word for walk and market is spelled and pronounced the same way, the word for pen can also refer to internal genitalia and/or pubic hair in a female-assigned person in a somewhat rude/abrupt way, and utilizing a nasal versus open vowel sound in ‘I would like to meet you’ in Kreyòl changes that sentence to ‘I would like to fuck you’. Luckily, most Haitians are extremely accommodating to outsiders and understand that mistakes are honest mistakes (but they will laugh…).
Tone and composure (how you fix your face when you speak) is super important. How a sentence is said communicates as much, if not more, than the actual word. How I say ‘yon fanm sa a la’ can change ‘the woman over there’ to ‘can you believe this biiiiiiiitch over there’.
Kreyòl must be spoken with mouth open: no mumbling, etc. To get words across accurately, the mouth must open to make all the sounds.
The language is an independent standalone language with piece of French, Spanish, English, and multiple African languages visible. Much of the sentence structuring is African-derived, particularly from Bantu and Yoruba sources. There is a recent and evolving movement to claim identity of the language as Haitian only, not as Kreyòl.
The language also reflects the lived history of the country and it’s people. A lot of common phraseology reflects the history of enslavement; one of the more common ways to ask where someone lives in-country is ki bò ou ye/kibò ou ye, which translates to ‘what side are you from’. This is directly related to how enslaved Africans lived; plantations were huge and sprawling and so when enslaved Africans met others who were on the same plantation, how they related where they lived on the plantation was in that manner. Like vodou, the language is it’s own living history.
In the religion, language gets more complicated. French is utilized in some specific instances and some spirits, if/when they speak, only speak French, but Kreyòl is the liturgical language of the religion. All the songs and majority of the prayers are in Kreyòl, the community speaks Kreyòl, etc. In general, French is falling away as being a conversational language in Haiti–it is often used in business and medicine, but that’s about it.
There is also langaj, the language of the spirits. This is largely untranslatable language that spirits sometimes use in possession–it can be a combination of Kreyòl and African-descended sounds that are not complete in any African language. What langaj means is often private between the spirit and to whom that spirit is speaking, with the most common uses become accepted parlance (think ritual exclamations, like ‘ayibobo’, ‘awoche Nago’, ‘alaso’, ‘djarvodo/djavodo/djavado’).
Kreyòl is also spoken differently by spirits than by people. Kreyòl in general has many dialects throughout the country, and it follows that the spirits have many dialects as well. Kreyòl in general is spoken very fast by Haitians, and the spirits follow suit with that. In addition, some spirits speak more rural or localized forms of Kreyòl depending on what part of Haiti they are from. Some spirits speak very nasally, some speak so softly it almost sounds like they are only letting out soft breaths, some mix Kreyòl and langaj, some only speak/yell at top volume. All of that is super different than what a language program or even an in-person class can teach, and soKreyòl learned and used in religious settings is picked up contextually.
LearningKreyòl can be a daunting pursuit. Since it is SO orally focused, the best way is to learn orally in an immersive setting; either an intensive class or in Haiti or the Haitian community. There are some language programs, most of them are not great. Here’s what I like:
Ann Pale Kreyol by Albert Valdman is an excellent place to start. Though it is older and some of it is dated, it is still pretty foundational and his teaching methods are still used in classroom teaching. It is pricey for a used copy, but there are PDFs easily available online.
Valdman also produced a bilingual English-Haitian Kreyòl dictionary and it is FANTASTIC. I have several dictionaries and this is by far the best–you get definitions of words, what parts of speech they are, and how they are used both in English and in Kreyòl sentences. It is pricey and you could beat someone to death with it, but it is worth it for learning.
Pawol Lakay is as useful as Ann Pale Kreyol is, and it also comes with CDs (if you can threaten Amazon into making sure they send them with the book). It can be a little weak on sentence structure and what parts of speech are, but it’s good. There is a forthcoming language learning system for Kreyòl that beats the pants off of anything else on the market but it is not out yet.
MangoLanguages is good for basic hello/goodbye/my name is fluency, but I did not find it useful for conversational use. Good introduction, though, and the pronunciation in-program is pretty on-point. Most public library systems and college/university libraries have a free subscriptions for this, there are also pay options.
There are other books that are aimed at travelers and casual users which can be useful, but the above are the best resources I have seen so far. I do not like the Pimsleur system for Kreyòl at all, as it is super limited to essentially picking up women in Port-au-Prince which is great if that’s your jam but not useful for much of anything else. Youtube is full of Kreyòl movies and television and music, which is good to throw on in the background to absorb the sound and cadence of the language. Several professors have cautioned about listening to Haitian radio unless it originates in Haiti, saying that most Haitian radio originating in the US is a broadcast in a mix of Kreyòl and bad French, which can trip up a learner.
I hope this helps! Let me know if I can offer more info.
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This is probably gonna be a little rambly and there's two things that are kinda related but not really.
Anyway I'm currently in a relationship and I think I may be lithromantic, or maybe I'm just not as into my girlfriend, we'll call her L, as I thought I was? We're also exclusive relationship meaning a lot of the intimacy that I usually had with one of my best friends, G, (who I'm honestly a little dependent on) is off the table which kinda makes me feel bad. The only thing is I don't want to hurt her or lose our friendship.
And there's a class I share with G, and he's been wanting to be more social and intimate in general with other people and there's someone else in the same class, M, that he's been wanting to hang out with and I'm weirdly jealous of her. She's a nice person but I hate seeing her because I feel pre-emptively left out-- like when G went with her to show where a water fountain was and it took them a while to come back. They haven't even interacted much in person out of class. Idk I don't want to lose him? I've not gotten jealous of any other of the friends we share, maybe it's cause a lot of the other friends aren't available for intimacy.
Idk if any of that makes sense. I feel so confused. I know I should talk to my girlfriend and be less dependent on the best friend and I really hate being jealous and a lot of my thinking is black and white and idk it's all so hard it sucks.
Hello there,
It sounds like there's a lot of confusing thoughts and feelings going on for you right now.
I want to address the stuff with G. It sounds like you used to have a close, intimate relationship with G, but you agreed to discontinue that intimacy when you went exclusive with L. This was obviously something you were okay with at the time, but in your message, I'm hearing uncertainty. I think that this is worth exploring with yourself.
I often find that journalling about my thoughts regarding a topic can really help. Sometimes I'll just write and see what comes up, sometimes I'll ask myself questions (like "what are you feeling?" "why are you feeling that way" etc) and answer them to get a deeper look at my feelings, or sometimes I use the app Finch to journal to specific topics. Any form of journalling can give a real insight into what your deeper thoughts are.
I think that it would be worth asking yourself questions like what was your relationship like with L and G before the relationship, and now that you're in the relationship. What do you like about those changes, what don't you like about those changes? If anything was to be different, what would you want? Keep asking yourself questions as you get further into the exploration.
If your needs have changed since when you entered the relationship (for example, if you need to keep that intimacy with G to be happy), it is true that your girlfriend's needs may not match yours (continuing the example, for instance, if L had a boundary about not being intimate with G or others). It really comes down to what is important to each of you as individuals and as a couple.
Once you've checked in with yourself, yes, I think it'd be a good idea to speak with your girlfriend about how you're feeling. Hopefully by this point, you may have some more insight to your own feelings on the topic, and can go in saying "this is how I feel, and this is what I would need changed to be happy". I can't guess as to what that result is, because it depends on what you genuinely need. Whether that's means more or less communication with someone, more or less intimacy with someone, etc. Your needs are important and it's okay to get them across.
I understand that part can be scary - the talking to people. You say you don't want to lose anyone, and I can empathise with that a lot. I am a chronic people-pleaser, so "don't leave me" is how my nervous system is wired! But I want you to know that living your life to your needs, living it authentically, that's what is going to make you most happy. If that means staying with L, exploring lithromaticism and putting some distance in with G, great! If it means talking to L about how you miss how your friendship with G used to be, great! If it means needing to leave the relationship to pursue yourself, great! None of these options are wrong. The fear of losing someone is strong, but know that if you're true to yourself and act in a way that is kind, then you have done the very best that you can do.
Sorry that I can't actually give you the answer on what is the right path to take. I'd love to do that, but unfortunately this decision will be based on what you really want in your life. Try that journalling, and see if it takes you closer to finding out what it is that you need in your life. And also check out out page here on Sexuality and Gender, it may give you some guidance as you question your orientation.
Good luck, you've got this.
Positive thoughts your way, Alexandria.
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