#It was the best of times it was the worst of times
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commodorez · 2 days ago
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General pieces of advice for 2025:
Switch to Firefox
Ignorance is not a sin -- don't be afraid to say "I don't know", despite what academia might have taught you
Engage in good-faith discussions with your fellow user, you might find a new friend
Ask questions. Most of the time, the worst case scenario the answer is "I don't know"
Reblog stuff you enjoy for others to enjoy. Likes don't mean much here on tumblr (think of them as bookmarks), but a reblog may make someone's day -- especially artists!
Cite your sources on images and try to tag things accurately where you can. Some folks will enjoy knowing where you found something so they can learn more. The breadcrumbs you drop may lead to someone else's inspiration
Forgive yourself
Take pictures of the mundane, like your house. You never know when you will need to look back on that again for posterity/prosperity or more likely utility
Friendships made beyond school are forged through showing up regularly to the same space
Wear your face mask. Yes. Still. You want a KN95 or better, make sure it's a good seal. And keep up to date with your covid boosters. Not only do you not want to get sick, you don't want to be the reason someone else gets sick. It sucks, but getting long covid sucks more. Each time you catch it, your chances of developing long covid increase because the damage is cumulative
Install an adblocker: ublock origin, pi-hole, whatever's new and beautiful
Don't feed the generative AI. Draw it shitty or hire an artist.
Go to a Vintage Computer Festival
Take the old batteries out of your vintage computers and electronics so you don't have to deal with a corrosion-fest. Varta meltdowns suck
Check if your headlights are on. DRLs are not enough, and some cars don't automatically turn them on. If you headlights are on, that will turn your tail lights on. Other drivers need to be able to see you on the road
Turn off "best stuff first" on your tumblr dashboard controls. It's your dashboard, curate it! Otherwise, you miss out on the really niche stuff
Remember that progress is not always linear
Take a moment to enjoy silence in your space. Mr. Rogers put it best, we live in a noisy world
Help your mom out with doing the dishes, or however that proverb best applies to you and your situation
Thank folks around you for things that they do that nobody thinks to show appreciation for. It goes a long way when people are seen for the effort they put in
Be good to each other
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choerrypuffs · 2 days ago
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AITA for setting my cheating ex's car on fire? (and then falling for his cousin)
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pairing: firefighter!haechan x reader
genre: fluff
word count: 8.6k
synopsis: revenge is best served cold―or on fire. literally.
author’s note: luvpuffcore is finally back!! ilysm cat and moon and thank you for another amazing year of friendship <333 i truly am the #1 most successful fan of all time 🤩 also special shoutout to cat for letting me use some of her creepy dms and moon for sharing her league knowledge yall are god's strongest soldiers fr !! happy new year, my loves ✨🎆💞
warning(s): mentions/threats of violence, sexual jokes, y/n commits arson but in a girly pop way (pls don't try this at home), character assassination of mark
playlist: get him back! by olivia rodrigo ― is it new years yet? sabrina carpenter ― drinks or coffee by rosé ― risk by gracie abrams ― mastermind by taylor swift
additional: check out a nonsense christmas: reddit edition collab!
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r/AmITheAsshole
u/justgirlythings-arson119 • 3d
AITA for setting my cheating ex’s car on fire? (and then falling for his cousin)
I (24F) caught my boyfriend cheating on me with a discord kitten he met on League of Legends two days before our anniversary. I proceeded to have the biggest crash out ever known to man, bought a gallon of gasoline, went to his house in the middle of the night, and lit his car on fire. I had completely forgotten his cousin was a firefighter in the area, and he showed up at the scene, which hindered my masterful plan a little bit. Luckily, my ex didn’t press any charges though because no way in hell he’s going to admit he has a discord kitten in a court of law. Anyways, the next day, my ex groveled and begged me to go to his family’s Christmas party with him so that he could save face in front of his mommy. Long story short―let’s just say it didn’t go well. His cousin ended up driving me home, and I think maybe I’ve fallen for him? 
⥣ 9.8k ⥥ 1,439 Comments
mcballs-im-lovin-it0323 • 2d YTA for not crashing out even harder bc i woulda slept with his entire bloodline if he played in my face like that 🙂‍↕️
➥ Reply ⥣ 2.8k ⥥
picklepounder1010 • 1d would’ve had him calling me mama, papa, auntie, uncle, grandma, grandpa etc fr 😩 ➥ ⥣ 943 ⥥
god-of-donuts0423 • 1d YTA for dating a lol player
➥ Reply ⥣ 1.1k ⥥
goonknight1027 • 5h no way this post is about that twink lol streamer ➥ ⥣ 629 ⥥
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part one | oh, i wanna key his car…or light it ablaze?
onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:03 PM heyyy u play lol too 😂
onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:05 PM im a yasuo main 😂
onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:10 PMwhat kinda asian are u
onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:10 PMwhatchu look like
onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:10 PMsorry was that too much 😂😂😂
Your best friend, Rosie, has to put your phone down and take a few deep breaths. “I think I’m going to throw up.”
“Keep going. You haven’t even seen the worst of it,” you respond through a mouthful of strawberry ice cream, completely deadpan. 
onyourmark 12/7/2024 6:21 AM ahh 😂😂
onyourmark 12/7/2024 6:22 PM *kisses you*
onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:39 PM can i tell U something weird :3 😂
onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:40 PM[Audio Message]
onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:39 PMi wrote this rap about my feelings for y baby girl
onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:39 PMbecause uve been such a good gril for me
onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:57 PM holy fck holy dcking fck that body of urs is absurd
Rosie covers her mouth with her hand, closing her eyes in a grimace. “No way he copied Adam Levine unironically.” 
“Keep going.”
onyourmark Yesterday at 1:20 AMwhen can i see u
onyourmark Yesterday at 1:20 AM ill be free after christmas
onyourmark Yesterday at 1:20 AM after annyign fam stuff 😂😂😂
Every message Rosie reads feels like another sucker punch in your gut and your ego, but you just dig your spoon into the tub of ice cream with even more force and let her keep going. Every time you blink, you feel dried up mascara flaking off your eyelashes and getting stuck in the dried tears and snot on your cheeks. 
“‘Annoying fam stuff?’ Is he talking about your anniversary?” Rosie demands.
Yes, your anniversary with your now ex-boyfriend, Mark Lee, is on Christmas. You used to think it was romantic. What a goddamn idiot you were. 
“At least he called me family,” you reply wryly, a hysterical laugh rattling in your chest like a wet cough. 
Rosie shakes her head and hands your phone back to you. “I can’t read any more of this. I’m going to be sick. I thought Discord mods and Discord kittens were just memes. I can’t believe people like him actually exist.” 
You just shrug.
“Where the hell is he now?” She crosses her arms. 
“Probably at his parents’ house. They’re on a ski trip, and they won’t be back until tomorrow,” you sigh, getting a headache thinking about how you were going to explain this to Mark’s parents. 
“Good. Change the locks on your door before he tries to come crawling back. He’s done mooching off you,” Rosie huffs. 
“You were right,” you state matter-of-factly, “That he was just a jobless bum loser who’s a momma’s boy.” 
She looks guilty, leaning over and giving you a hug. “I’m sorry, Y/N.” 
You think about the time you first met Mark, when the two of you were just starry-eyed freshmen in college together. He was so awkward and shy that it took almost an entire semester for him to finally look you in the eye. He followed you around like a sad puppy and would get flustered at any prolonged amount of attention you gave him. After about three years of him being hopelessly in love with you and unable to work up the courage to ask you out, you finally decided to give him a chance in your final year of college. It was a white Christmas, and you remember his trembling hands holding your face, freezing cold fingertips brushing your cheeks, and how red his nose was when he leaned in to kiss you. He looked at you as if you were a goddess that was put on this Earth purely for him to worship. 
Maybe that’s why you moved in together with him when the two of you graduated, even when he was unemployed and you supported him financially. Maybe that’s why you smiled and nodded when he told you he wanted to try being a Twitch streamer. Maybe that’s why you gifted him his first microphone for his setup, or baked him a cake when he finally got his first viewer (even though it was actually a secret account that you made in order to boost his confidence). Maybe that’s why you never complained when he started skipping out on dates (sometimes even your birthday) in favor of growing his audience, or when he bought you extravagant gifts like jewelry or designer clothes without any clue of your preference or size. Maybe that’s why you chose to ignore the churning feeling in the pit of your stomach when you noticed his eyes starting to drift towards anything but you.
Maybe you were always the one who worshipped him. 
It’s almost comical how easily almost a decade of your life has gone down the drain―and all it took was a couple of laughing emojis. In the end, the one who loves more is always the one who loses the most. 
You gave up your best years to Mark Lee, and yet you seemed to have run out of tears to cry for this man. 
Instead, all you have left now is pure, unbridled rage boiling inside of you. It’s the kind of anger that needs to simmer first―the kind that manifests first as a calm indifference before it finally bubbles over into a complete meltdown. But you’ll be damned before you set fire to your mental health and personal belongings that you worked tooth and nail for over a man who ruined your life. 
So, you’ve decided to set fire to something else. 
“Rosie,” you say softly, your voice chillingly serene. “I’m going to set his car on fire.” 
Rosie laughs. “Want me to be your getaway driver?” 
“No, I wouldn’t want to implicate you,” you respond smoothly. “Besides, I want him to know that I’m the one who did it.” 
She looks at you for a moment, trying to decide if you’re joking or not. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 
“Yes. I don’t have the energy to care about him anymore,” you answer―only a half lie. “You should go now. I know you have a late shift tonight.” 
Rosie gives you another tight squeeze. “Call me if you need anything, okay? I’m off this weekend, so we should go get drunk off our asses.” 
After she leaves, you slowly get up and make your way to the bathroom. You wash your face in the sink, scrubbing on the gunk off, and apply a fresh layer of makeup. If you’re going to do this, you’re going to make sure you look hot as hell (pun intended). Once you’re done, you make your way to the nearest gas station and purchase a gallon of gasoline before promptly driving to Mark’s parent’s house. 
By the time you get there, it’s already close to midnight, and not even the darkness can shroud Mark’s new Tesla Cybertruck. You remember when he bought it because you had to pay for half of his rent for the month because he was saving up for it―the smug grin on his face, as he announced it to his Twitch chat. You’re embarrassed at how happy you were for him, and you didn’t even have the heart to tell him how hideous you found it. The truck’s mirrored exterior reflects the moon in the starless night sky, and the full moon almost looks like a shiny, pretty bullseye calling out for you to destroy it. 
Without hesitation, you get out of your car and immediately start dumping gasoline all over and around the car. The scent of gasoline normally makes you nauseous, but the scent of revenge smells even sweeter. Before you take out your lighter, you pick up a large piece of broken concrete from his driveway. With all of the strength you can muster, you hurl the concrete into the driver side window of the truck and watch your reflection shatter along with the glass. 
The car alarm starts blaring, and you wait for the light in Mark’s room to blink on. You see his silhouette as he opens his blinds and peers out, just to lock eyes with you. He gawks at you like he’s just seen a ghost, and it doesn’t take long for him to make his way down to you. As he stumbles down the driveway, you take out your lighter and flick it on, letting it slowly slip from your fingertips. Your heart swells with a hysterical sense of glee as his eyes widen, the orange flames reflecting in his teary eyes. His Cybertruck is set ablaze with a Hollywood-esque level of perfection, and the fire gives your face a golden glow as if you were the starring actress. 
“Y/N! Are you fucking crazy?” Mark hollers over the crackle of the flames, voice breaking. 
“Oh, you bet I fucking am,” you laugh. 
“I’m gonna sue you―you bitch! Have you thrown in jail!” he screams, fishing his phone out of his pocket and punching in 911 on the keypad. “I’m calling the cops right now!” 
“Do it, you spineless piece of shit! I’m going to make sure everyone in this damn neighborhood and on the internet knows what a lying, cheating, soul-sucking little leech you are!” you yell back at him. “I’m going to ruin your fucking career first and then happily walk my ass down to the police station.”
That makes Mark stop in his tracks, his thumb hovering over the dial button. He can’t control the fear on his face. “No one is gonna believe you.” 
“Aw, you sure no one will believe me when I show everyone the screenshots of your DMs with uwukittenbb69?” you taunt. 
“I’ll say they’re fake!” he nearly screeches. 
“Let’s fucking go then! My word against yours. We’ll see who they believe,” you challenge. 
Mark falters and takes a small step forward. “W-Wait…” 
Unfortunately for him, he’s interrupted by the squealing sirens of a firetruck pulling up to the street. You and Mark exchange glances, and you silently dare him to report you, before both of you turn towards the firefighters exiting the truck. 
“Mark…and Y/N?” 
Your eyes widen at the sound of the approaching firefighter’s voice. You watch in horror as the firefighter removes his helmet, and you get a clearer look at his face. Tufts of wavy caramel-colored hair sticking out, a youthful and angelic face that doesn’t suit his occupation, and heart-shaped lips turned downwards in concern―it’s Mark’s cousin, Donghyuck. You’ve met him a decent amount of times at family gatherings, and he sometimes drops by you and Mark’s apartment to deliver homemade food from his mom. Donghyuck has always been kind to you, and you didn’t want him to see you like this.
Donghyuck’s confusion is short-lived before his attention falls back to the fire and how close you are to it. He quickly grabs your arm and pulls you away from the burning truck. 
“Be careful. Are you hurt?” he asks carefully, eyes scanning your face with precision. “And why aren’t you wearing a jacket? It’s freezing out here.” 
You open your mouth to try and fumble out an answer, but you flinch at the sound of Donghyuck’s colleagues blasting Mark’s car with water from the firetruck’s power hose. All that’s left of the Cybertruck is a deformed and blackened pile of scrap metal with a plume of smoke rising from it. You can’t help the sense of satisfaction you feel. 
“Don’t breathe in the smoke. It’s not good for you,” Donghyuck urges, gently sticking an arm in front of you and gesturing for you to step back even further. “Come with me. There’s blankets in the back of the truck.”
“I’m fine,” you finally manage to say, shaking your head. “I’m not cold.” 
It’s true; the fire you set has been more than enough to make your insides feel all warm and fuzzy. He doesn’t look like he believes you but doesn’t try to push any further. 
“Okay, so what the hell happened here? We got a call from the neighbors saying there was a blazing ball on fire in Mark’s driveway and that the two of you were in a screaming match.” 
“Ask Mark,” is all you say. 
Donghyuck raises an eyebrow. 
“It was an accident.”
As if on cue, Mark suddenly materializes next to you and Donghyuck―a restless expression on his face. He probably thought you were telling Donghyuck what he did to you and rushed over. 
“What?” Donghyuck’s eyes nearly pop out of his head. “You’re saying that was an accident?”
“Yeah. I was just…messing around. Don’t worry about it. It was an accident,” Mark says through gritted teeth, sounding completely defeated. 
The corners of your mouth twitch when you chime in, “A senseless accident.” 
Donghyuck is completely speechless as he glances between the two of you. However, you look past him and watch the fireworks exploding in the dark sky. Pulling out your phone, you see that it’s midnight, meaning it’s officially the 25th of December. Glancing over at Mark, you see him trembling in the cold with a sniffly red nose and bloodshot eyes. He’s staring straight at the ground, fists clenched. 
You smile. 
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part two | part two | wanna push him in the fireplace and watch him burn!
When you finally get home that night, you draw yourself a steaming hot bubble bath and even use the fancy bath bomb that Rosie bought you. After you get dressed, you make a charcuterie board and pour yourself a glass of wine as well before falling asleep to a Hallmark movie playing on your television. It’s probably the best sleep you’ve gotten over the past month. 
You wake up in the morning feeling refreshed, a certain five-foot-nine burden lifted from your shoulders, and text all of your friends and family your holiday greetings. Rosie invited you out to her family gathering because she didn’t want you to be alone on Christmas, but you declined. You decided to stay home and get some cleaning done. Of course, by cleaning, you mean boxing up all of Mark’s stuff and donating it to Goodwill. You initially wanted to burn everything, but you’ve committed enough arson already. 
Just as you’re getting ready to make a hearty breakfast in preparation for the mass Mark exodus, you hear the door to your apartment being opened, and your blood runs cold when you realize you haven’t changed the lock. Then your cold blood begins to boil at the audacity that Mark still must have in his pathetic little body to even dream of stepping foot in your home. 
Gripping your frying pan tightly, you march out of the kitchen to greet him. Mark at least has the sense to shrivel back when he sees you approach him. To your delight, he looks absolutely terrible. It’s obvious he didn’t get any sleep nor did he feel the need to change out of his pajamas. 
“I know you’re mad,” he says quickly, holding his hands out as if ready to block a punch.
“If you actually knew that, you wouldn’t have stepped foot in my apartment,” you say nonchalantly. “You have ten seconds to give my key back to me and get the hell out before you have to call the cops again.”
“Chill, chill,” he mutters, “I’m just here for my stuff―”
“Don’t tell me to chill. I’ve always hated it when you tell me that. It makes you sound like a patronizing douchebag, which you are, of course,” you snap. “You’re insane if you think I’m going to let you just waltz in here and casually get your stuff. Most of which I paid for, by the way.”
“Y/N, come on,” he sighs. “at least let me get my PC setup.”
That makes you burst out laughing. “Holy shit. You really have the gall to ask me for your PC setup? Are you on actual crack? Get the fuck out!”
“Okay, okay, okay. I’m sorry, okay? Just one more thing―”
“Don’t make me swear to Jesus on his birthday―” 
“My mom wants you to come to the Christmas party this afternoon,” he blurts out, squeezing his eyes shut. “I…haven’t told her yet. I wanted us to tell her, um, together, after the party.”
He doesn’t need to say it for you to understand what he’s implying. He wants to make it seem like the breakup was mutual to save his reputation and because he knows his mom will lose her mind. He’s pretended to be her perfect little boy his entire life, a momma’s boy to the very core, so he can’t ever let her know what a bottomfeeder he is. 
“Is this some sort of social experiment to see how far you can push my limits before I finally snap? Again?” you ask incredulously. 
“Please, Y/N. I’ll do anything. I won’t ask for my stuff anymore. I won’t tell anyone about the car thing. I promise you that you won’t ever see me again if you do me this favor,” Mark sputters.
You hate that you still hesitate, despite how much you’re disgusted by him. It makes you feel like you haven’t completely axed the part of you that was in love with him, and that sickens you. However, Mrs. Lee has always been like a second mother to you, and it doesn’t feel right to just cut her off without a proper goodbye just because her son is a cretin. You suppose this could be good closure for such an ill-fated relationship. 
“You swear on your life that you’ll leave me alone forever after this?” you ask, crossing your arms.
Mark nods profusely.
“Fine. I’m only staying for an hour, and I don’t care if the party isn’t over yet. We’re going to tell her within that period or else,” you state. 
“Thank you. Thank you so much, Y/N.” Mark opens his arms to hug you, and it takes every fiber in your being not to whack him across the head with your frying pan. 
“Do not touch me,” you warn, “Now get out.” 
To his credit, he promptly hightails it out of your apartment (perhaps he finally noticed the murderous glint in your eye). You almost immediately regret agreeing, but you tell yourself that today is the last day that you’ll ever have to deal with the likes of Mark Lee again. Putting a hold on cleaning, you get ready for the party instead, donning a cute holiday fit that you had prepared especially for today since it was supposed to be your anniversary. Now, it makes for a great revenge dress. 
Mark had texted you to let you know to bring a gift since there would be a white elephant gift exchange, and half of you wants to call him and scream at him for not letting you know sooner and the other half is screaming at yourself for forgetting to block him. Not having enough time to go out and buy a gift, you decide to wrap up the scarf that you knitted for Mark. You stayed up all night after you got off work to make it for him, and it looks a bit wonky, but you thought he would appreciate it. You feel bad for whoever receives it, but there has to be a few duds in the mix or it’s not a true white elephant experience. Maybe they can use the scarf to wipe up their dog’s piss or something.
When you drive back to Mark’s parents’ house, it’s an ironic clash of atmospheres. The place is decked out with Christmas decorations, an amalgamation of rainbow lights, inflatable snowmen, and wreaths on every door and window. Yet, you can also see remnants of the dark burn marks in their driveway. Mark must have managed to call a tow to take his Cybertruck away just in the nick of time. You do wonder how he managed to explain the burn marks, though. 
Taking in a deep breath, you hype yourself up in your car visor mirror before stepping out and walking to the front door. Before you can even knock, Mrs. Lee opens the door and envelops you in a bear hug. She smells like sugar cookies, and it occurs to you how much you’ll miss her. 
“Oh, sweetie! I’m so glad you’re here,” she coos, cupping your face. She then ushers you into the living room, linking her arm through yours. “I was so worried because I thought the two of you got into a fight while we were on our trip.”
You just smile uncomfortably. “O-Oh.” 
“A mother’s intuition is always right, you know,” she says, winking, “Plus, I knew something was off when Mark told us he’d be staying at our place for a couple nights. Poor boy was a mess, you know. He somehow managed to total his car in the driveway! Can you believe it? He really needs you around to whip him into shape!” 
You hope she can’t see you holding in a laugh. As you’re walking, you scan the room for Mark, but he’s nowhere to be seen. It doesn’t surprise you one bit that you’re being treated as fodder so he can hide in his room. 
“Anyways, say hi to everyone!” She leads you directly into a circle of Mark’s aunt and uncles. You give them all an awkward hello and try to slink away while they all converse, but one of Mark’s aunts turns towards you. 
“So, how long have you and Mark been together, honey?” she asks. 
“Um, about four years―”
“Oh, but they’ve known each other for much longer than that. Seven years! Mark had the biggest crush on her, you know,” Mrs. Lee interjects. 
“My goodness, does that mean we’ll be hearing wedding bells soon?” Mark’s aunt teases. The rest of the circle oohs and ahhs, and you want to strangle yourself with a garland. 
“I mean, what is he waiting for anyway? He’s making loads of money on the Internet now, isn’t he?” she continues. 
“Exactly. I want grandchildren, you know,” Mrs. Lee huffs. 
Unable to bite back your words anymore, you clear your throat loudly. “I have something I need to―” 
“Oh, Y/N! I’ve been looking for you,” another voice chimes in. 
All of you turn around, and a gasp nearly escapes you when you see Donghyuck standing in front of you. He’s in a white cable knit sweater, and his wavy hair looks so fluffy that you almost want to reach out and touch it. His cheeks are a bit flushed, probably because he’s in such thick clothing (or Mrs. Lee’s famous spiked eggnog). Without his uniform on, he looks much softer, dreamier. 
“You…have?” you ask, bewildered. 
“Yup! Come on, I gotta ask you something,” he answers cheerfully, gesturing for you to follow him. 
You’re a bit wary of what he’s scheming, but you’d rather risk it than have to deal with any more marriage talk, so you gladly let him whisk you away from the crowd. Donghyuck leads you to a less crowded part of the room, swiping a piece of chocolate cake when he walks past the dessert table, and tucks himself into a corner that’s concealed by a giant Christmas tree. 
“Here we go. I introduce to you my super covert corner that I stand in when I want to avoid nosy relatives,” he says in a sing-song voice before offering you the cake in his hand. “Would you like some German chocolate cake made by yours truly? It’s pretty damn average, if I do say so myself.” 
You pause, only just now realizing that Donghyuck helped you out. You suppose you have nothing to lose, so you accept the cake. “Oh. Thank you. So, you didn’t have anything you wanted to ask me?” 
“Well, actually, I do,” he hums, giving you a sheepish grin. “You set Mark’s car on fire last night, didn’t you?”
Part of you already expected this question coming, so you manage to keep your expression neutral. “Are you accusing me?” 
“Why, I wouldn’t dare. Besides, I don’t need to. I know you did,” he says casually, shrugging.
Even though you should feel panicked, you don’t. In fact, Donghyuck almost seems to find it amusing. 
“Do you have proof?”
“Mark told me,” he states sweetly.
You sigh loudly, immediately giving up the ruse. “I knew that damn lowlife would yap.” 
“So, what did he do?” 
“Of course, he told you what I did but didn’t tell you what he did,” you snort. 
“What, he cheat or something?” 
“Worse.” 
You pull out your phone and show Donghyuck Mark’s Discord DMs and watch his expression morph into disgust as you indulge in the cake he gave you. The dessert is perfectly average as he said, but there’s something charming about it. In that way, the cake is quite similar to its maker. 
“As a government employee and resident fighter of fires, nothing justifies arson,” he states after a brief moment to collect his thoughts, “but this comes pretty damn close.” 
You give him a smug I-told-you-so look.
“But seriously, what you did was really dangerous, Y/N. You could have injured yourself badly. That jackass is not worth getting third-degree burns over. There are better ways to get revenge, you know,” he lectures.
“Like what?” You raise an eyebrow.
“I don’t know, like TP or egg his car or something. Slash his tires?” 
“God, are you from a 90s movie or something? That’s lame as hell,” you snort, taking another bite of cake.
“Dig your key into the side of his pretty little souped up four-wheel drive? Carve your name into his leather seats? Take a Louisville slugger to both headlights? Slash a hole in all four tires?” He wriggles his eyebrows. 
“Are you quoting Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood?” you ask incredulously.
“Maybe next time he’ll think before he cheats…” Donghyuck sings, purposefully off-key. 
You can’t fight that smile that spreads across your face, and it eventually turns into a full-on belly laugh when he continues to sing. It’s the first genuine laugh, the first moment of brief happiness and relief, that you’ve felt in a long time. You thought you had it when you set Mark’s car on fire, but something still coiled in the pit of your stomach like simmering, black smoke. In this tiny little corner that smells of pine needles and chocolate cake, you feel free like a clear sky after a long winter storm.
“For the record,” Donghyuck says, voice gently dipping, “you’ve always been too good for him, and everyone knows it―including him. He’ll regret what he did to you for the rest of his life. That’s your revenge.” 
Your breath staccatos in your chest at his words. You tell yourself that he has always been a smooth talker, but he looks at you with such honesty and warmth that you want to believe him. 
“Have you always been this sweet?” You meant for the words to come out in a teasing manner, but your voice is tinged with breathlessness. 
Donghyuck grins, and his lips remind you of the heart-shaped lollipops that you see in the store during Valentine’s Day. “The sweetest.” 
A part of you wonders what would happen if you craned your neck and kissed him right here and now. Not because you’re romantically interested in him, of course. Rather, it would be a spectacular way to get revenge on Mark. Most girls go for the brother or the best friend―maybe even the dad if one is particularly ambitious―but the cousin is an untapped (pun NOT intended) medium for revenge. 
You wonder if Donghyuck tastes like cookies or wine-filled chocolates or spiked eggnog or even fruitcake. You really hate fruitcake, but you suppose you wouldn’t mind for the sake of revenge. 
But you would never do that to him. He’s much too kind of a person to be involved in you and Mark’s mess. The fact that you’re able to confide in him and he actually takes your side is something that you truly appreciate. As much as you want to torment Mark, it’s best to just end it here. 
“You can use me too, you know,” Donghyuck adds.
“Huh?” You blink.
“For your revenge,” he clarifies. “Use me. To make him jealous, to bully him, whatever you want.” 
For a moment, you almost believe he somehow read your mind. 
“Just wanted to let you know,” he says, shrugging, “since you probably think it would be too mean. Plus, I think you would need my help anyways.”
That makes you feel greatly offended. “What is that supposed to mean? You say that like I didn’t set a car on fire.” 
“You’re too naive in your thinking. Revenge doesn’t always have to be loud and in your face like that. It’s a lot more fun when you break them down psychologically in more subtle ways,” he explains.
“So, you―as a government employee―can’t approve of me committing arson because I got cheated on, but you―as a government employee―can casually and openly discuss waging psychological warfare on another civilian. On said person who cheated on me, who also happens to be your cousin because you seemed to have forgotten that, ” you point out sardonically. 
Donghyuck just smiles before slightly leaning in, eyes flickering down to your lips. You open your mouth to retort but your words instantly die in your throat, softly gasping when his hand brushes your chin as he reaches over and swipes a bit of chocolate frosting from your bottom lip with his thumb. 
“Sure I can,” he answers smoothly, “because, unlike a certain someone, I won’t get caught.” 
“I didn’t―”
“And by the way, Mark didn’t tell me you set his car on fire.” 
You gawk at him as he walks past you with a content grin on his face. “Now come on, I hear my aunt calling for us.” 
Maybe you need to take back your earlier statement of Donghyuck being too kind. He might actually have more screws loose than you.
.
.
.
You almost completely forget about Mark until he finally comes downstairs for the white elephant exchange. You’re in such a daze from your earlier interaction with Donghyuck that you barely recoil when Mark takes a seat beside you on the couch, especially since Donghyuck is sitting in the rocking chair directly across from you. 
The gift exchange begins once everyone has drawn a number, and you honestly just dissociate for the first half of it. Keeping your gaze trained on the piece of paper that has 26 scribbled on it, you don’t look up until you feel Mark get up beside you and pick a gift from the pile. You’re praying to both Jesus and Santa that he doesn’t pick yours, but you suppose you've been deemed a sinner and also put on the Naughty List (maybe for setting your cheating ex’s care on fire?) because Mark somehow manages to find yours in the pile of presents. 
When he opens it, you can tell by the way he quickly glances at you that he knows it’s yours. After all, he saw you practicing your knitting throughout the week. He happily wraps it around his neck and beams proudly. “I love it.”
The way he carefully looks back at you makes you want to smack him into the new year. You know he’s trying to get on your good side, and you make it clear with your scowl that it isn’t working. 
You’re actually grateful that it’s your turn next so that you’re able to get up and walk away from him. Wanting to get this entire situation over with, you haphazardly grab one from the top of the pile. Your heart sinks when you take out the stuffing paper from the bag and realize that it’s Mark’s gift. You contemplate putting the paper back in and not opening it at all, but you cave under the pressure of all the expectant pairs of eyes on you. 
In typical Mark fashion, his gift is a signed T-shirt of his own merch. It’s an obnoxious yellow color with his Twitch username and a giant screen printed image of his face plastered across it. He’s written his signature right over his forehead, so it makes him look like he has random chicken scratch on his face. 
“Oh, it must be destiny!” Mrs. Lee exclaims, clapping her hands together. 
You force a smile before returning to your seat, doing everything in your power to ignore Mark’s stupid giddy expression. Shoving the shirt back into the bag, you casually kick it away from you. 
A couple more people take their turns, and you’re counting down the seconds to when this is finally over so you can go home. Eventually, it’s Donghyuck’s turn, and he saunters towards you and holds his hand out. 
“Gimme.”
You blink at him.
“Your gift. I’m stealing it,” he explains, wiggling his fingers. 
“You want…this?” you ask, completely baffled. 
“Well, duh. It’s going to sell for a lot of money, you know.” He winks. 
You can’t help but laugh when you realize he’s helping you out again. “This has to be unethical. Aren’t you a government employee?” 
“Government employees need to make money too,” he replies, sighing. 
“Well, if you really want it, I guess I have no choice,” you huff, faking exasperation before handing him the bag. 
You’re smiling when he takes it and walks back to his chair, and you hear Mark grumble something under his breath. Turning to him, you raise an eyebrow, snippily asking, “What?”
“I said,” he repeats so loudly that it reverberates throughout the room, “when did the two of you get so friendly?” 
A silence falls over everyone, and the two of you are now center stage. 
“Are you really going to do this now?” you hiss. 
“I noticed that the two of you were getting awfully cozy behind the Christmas tree earlier,” Mark retorts, shrugging. 
Donghyuck gets up to intervene, but he doesn’t have time to even react before you grab a pillow from the couch and chuck it in Mark’s face. 
“You’ve got some nerve. Was this your plan all along? To make me look like the bad guy in front of your family?” you demand, feeling your face grow hotter and hotter from rage. “You and uwukittenbb69 were getting awfully cozy too, don’t you think? I’d say snug as a bug in a goddamn rug even.” 
Mark stands up in a flash, his eyes frantically glancing at his mom before pointing his finger at you. “Baby, I told you she was just a friend.” 
You nearly choke on air when you hear him call you that. Making a beeline towards the pile of presents, you begin to toss them at Mark with each question you add. “You absolute lunatic. Do friends beg each other for pictures of their tits? Do friends write raps confessing their love for one another? Do friends blow off their anniversary with their girlfriend so that they can meet up for a quick booty call? And yes, I’m saying quick because you and I both know it’ll be a speedy endeavor.”
“What on Earth is going on?” Mrs. Lee cries out as Mark tries his best to swat away the presents being hurled at him. 
“You’re a psycho bitch,” Mark yells. “It’s not like I actually slept with her. We were just messing around online. You got jealous over nothing. And you set my car on fire!” 
“You wanna see psycho?” you snap, throwing the present in your hands down onto the floor and marching towards him with your bare fists before you suddenly stop and take in your surroundings. You see the horror and shock on everyone’s faces, the way they’re looking at you, and then perhaps most clear of all―Mark’s expression. He’s angry just like you, but there’s a glimmer of victory in his eyes. As if he’s bested you in some manner. 
And he has. You’re the villain now.
Taking in a deep breath, you will yourself to walk over to Mark in a calm manner, looking him directly in the eye. 
“You’re nothing except a liar and a cheater, Mark Lee. That will never change that no matter how much you try to spin it in front of your family. You built your success off my back, and I hope that haunts you for the rest of your life. May you receive everything that you’ve done to me tenfold. That’s all I want to say—” You pause. “Oh, and I’ve always thought your Cybertruck was fucking ugly.” 
You reach over and snatch the scarf from his neck before turning and walking out of the door, feeling like you finally managed to cut off the ball and chain around your ankle. Just as you’re about to reach your car, you hear someone calling after you. 
“I’ll drive you home,” Donghyuck says once he catches up to you. 
“I’m not so distraught that I’ll become a hazard on the road,” you say wryly
“Well, when it comes to being around a car, you’ve certainly proved that you’re not exactly at your most dangerous when you’re behind the wheel,” he jokes. 
“You may have a point,” you acknowledge, giving him a small smile.
“Let me drive you home, Y/N. I’m worried about you,” he insists again, much quieter this time. 
“How are you going to get back then?” You raise an eyebrow. 
“I’ll call an Uber or something.” 
“That would be such a waste of money,” you snort.
“Not if it’s for you,” he says almost instantly. His normally brown eyes almost look auburn when under the golden glow of the sunset. 
There’s such determination, such assurance, such warmth in his gaze that you let yourself be surrounded with, no longer having the energy to resist him, and it feels like falling onto a soft cloud after a long, winding journey. For once, you just want someone to take care of you, even if it’s just for a moment. 
“Fine. Do as you please,” you relent, tossing him your car keys before walking around to the passenger side and climbing in. 
Donghyuck looks relieved, beaming when he situates himself in the driver’s seat. You try not to be impressed with the way he easily backs out of the driveway with one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the headrest behind you, maneuvering the wheel with a deftness you’ve never seen before. Then again, he does drive a massive fire truck on the daily, so your Toyota probably isn’t much of a challenge for him. 
He drives with his eyes staring straight down the road―almost too focused―because you know he’s trying not to look at you. Probably because you’re making it abundantly clear that you don’t want him to look at you, leaning your head against the window and away from him. It doesn’t mean that you don’t see his wandering eyes, almost as if it were second nature, drift back to you in the reflection of the window.
“Pathetic, right?” you finally say, feeling suffocated by the heavy silence.
“What’s pathetic?” 
“Me.” 
“Why would you be pathetic?” Donghyuck grips the steering wheel tightly, knuckles turning white as the leather creaks under the force of his hold.
“Mark was right. I talked a big game in front of him, but in the end, I was just the psycho ex-girlfriend. I told myself that I would never let him hold my emotions hostage anymore. That I would erase any care I had for him left in me. Because indifference means that I’m truly free. But I couldn’t do it. I really hate him, to my very core, and that means he still has power over me. I hate that most of all. I want him to feel the same pain I did, and I want to exact revenge on him, but at the same time, I want to move on with my life. I’m like a dog chasing my own tail; it’s pathetic.” 
You wanted to sound more lighthearted about this, turn it into a joke, but Donghyuck seems to draw out a vulnerability within you that makes you want to tell him everything you’ve been trying to desperately ignore. 
“Y/N, you’re dealing with the end of a long-term relationship. It’s only natural that you have confusing and conflicting feelings about everything. You’re not pathetic; you’re human. Mark stole your girlhood and your youth, and it’s going to take time for you to heal from that. It’s impossible to immediately get back on your feet after what he did to you. None of this is your fault, so don’t ever berate yourself,” Donghyuck’s voice trembles as he speaks. “I promise you that one day, you’re going to wake up and you’ll realize that you don’t remember what Mark's favorite food is. His favorite movie. His favorite color. Then you’ll realize that you can barely even remember what his face looks like when he’s sad, happy, angry. Eventually, you’ll forget about him entirely, and all the pain he caused you will just be seconds of your life that evaporates from your mind completely.”
When he speaks to you like there’s nothing he’s more sure of in this world, it makes you want to believe him. You want to be his promise. 
“Thank you, Donghyuck,” you whisper, placing your hand on top of his for just a moment before pulling away. Your touch is feather light, but you hope he didn’t notice the way your fingertips lingered a second longer. 
The two of you fall quiet again, but this time, the silence is much more comfortable now. You’re almost disappointed when he pulls into your apartment complex, unsure of how to say goodbye to him. 
“Would you like some hot cocoa or something?” you blurt out when he parks. “I think I have some in my apartment.”
You don’t realize how suggestive your offer sounds until it’s too late. Donghyuck hesitates for a moment, and you can tell he’s debating on if he should tease you about it or not. To your surprise, he doesn’t.
“Nah, it’s okay. It’s getting dark soon, so I should head back.” He pulls out his phone and starts ordering an Uber. 
“Want me to wait with you then?” You’re not sure why you keep insisting on staying with him, but this day has been so batshit insane that you almost feel like a passenger in your own body. 
“Probably not a good idea,” he chuckles.
Now, you feel both confused and slightly offended again.
“And why is that? I know I’ve been a bit of a menace today, but still…” you trail off awkwardly. 
Donghyuck pauses for a moment as he stares at you; his face is closer to yours than it’s ever been because you’re sitting right next to him. You can tell he’s thinking very carefully about his next words. It occurs to you that, for a guy as seemingly flippant as him, he is actually quite thoughtful.
“You know, I’ve been compared to Mark my entire life,” he begins, musing. 
“Sooo…you didn’t want me to wait with you because you’re gearing up for a trauma dump?” You raise an eyebrow. 
Donghyuck holds his hand up in front of you, shushing you. “Shh, let me have my big moment.” 
“Sorry. Please proceed.” 
“Ahem. As I was saying, I was but a poor, innocent wee boy living in the shadow of the golden child in our family. Mark was always the more athletic, the funnier, the more charming one. His grades were ass, but he always managed to get out of trouble because he was the favorite. When I got my job as a firefighter and he was unemployed, my family barely congratulated me or even acknowledged it at all because they were afraid they would upset Mark. You see, I’ve actually lived quite a tragic life,” Donghyuck sniffles, wiping away a fake tear. 
“What a shame that they can’t see how wonderful you are,” you chime in, a smile in your voice. 
Your honesty in response to his joke visibly catches him off guard, and he blinks a couple of times before your words finally register. 
“Right?” he huffs dramatically, but he can’t seem to meet your eyes completely as a light flush dustes his face and ears. “But fret not, I didn’t particularly mind. It was nice not having to live up to any expectations. Besides, I was happy for Mark when he finally got successful as a streamer. We were raised like brothers, and I always admired him. I was proud of him.” 
“Ha, little did you know—”
“All this to say that, growing up, I’ve never been once jealous of Mark,” Donghyuck states proudly. 
Then he slowly looks over at you with longing eyes, almost as if his body turning itself towards you is a natural reflex. His expression is so soft and affectionate that it nearly takes your breath away. 
“That is, until he met you.” 
So, this is what Donghyuck looks like when he’s in love. You wonder if it would ever be possible for you to wake up one day and not remember it. 
But you aren’t sure if you return his feelings in the same way. Just like you couldn’t bring yourself to use him for your revenge, you can’t bring yourself to ask him to wait for you while you figure out the mess of your current emotional state. The one who loves more always loses, and you don’t want to lose Donghyuck. 
“I just wanted to tell you that,” he continues, “I’m not expecting a response. It’s for the better you don’t respond right now anyways. If you want to pretend like this conversation was all a bad dream conjured up by sleep paralysis and never want to talk about it again, I’m okay with that too.” 
You smile. 
“But…if you’re able to, just look my way sometimes. I’ll do everything in my power to keep your attention, even if I have to get on a unicycle with a clown nose and juggle. And, if one day, you find yourself looking for me on your own, let me know. Then, I’ll ask for an answer,” Donghyuck promises.  
True to your word, you don’t give him an answer. Instead, you take the scarf that’s been laying across your lap—the scarf with a few holes thanks to missing yarn and sections where you accidentally knitted the pattern in the wrong direction. Now it’s a bit stretched out due to you snatching it off Mark. 
But this scarf, as average (maybe even less) as it may be, is charming in its own way. 
Leaning forward, you wrap the scarf around Donghyuck’s neck. He watches you in complete awe, in a trance, as if he were in a dream and any movement would wake him up. 
“I should head inside now,” you say quietly, trying not to giggle at his stupefied expression.
He only nods dazedly, and you’re certain that would have been his reaction regardless of what you said. It takes a few more beats for your words to actually click before he clears his throat loudly. “Right. Yes. You should.” 
He hands you your keys back before stepping out of the car and opening your door for you. “I’ll wait down here until you get inside, and then I’ll go meet my Uber.” 
“Thanks for driving me,” you say, realizing you never thanked him. 
“You’re welcome. Good night, Y/N.” Donghyuck puts his hands in his pockets and tucks his chin into the scarf as he watches you go.
As your hand hovers over the doorknob, you know you should just open the door and walk inside so you don’t keep him waiting in the cold. You really shouldn’t look back because it would mean that you wanted to. Not because he asked you to. 
But you do. You look back—
only to meet his eyes, the two of you exchanging knowing smiles.
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extra | is it me? am i the drama? i don’t think i’m the drama…
r/AmITheAsshole
u/justgirlythings-arson119 • 9h
(UPDATE) AITA for setting my cheating ex’s car on fire? (and then falling for his cousin)
So, it turns out my cheating ex got catfished. His supposed Discord kitten was actually some random guy and his friend who were dicking around. They ended up leaking the DMs so they’re all public now for those who would like to read them (by now, I’m sure you all know who my cheating ex is). I would highly advise against listening to the rap confession though. Godspeed if you choose to. I am also selling his expensive PC setup on Facebook Marketplace if anyone’s interested. Happy New Year!
P.S. I ended up inviting the cousin over for hot cocoa. He’s very sweet. 
⥣ 11.3k ⥥ 2,293 Comments
pissrevolver1122 • 8h rip bozo got catfished by me n bro for some robux 
➥ Reply ⥣ 3.8k ⥥
pooprevolver0205 • 8h can’t believe bro actually jacked off to a pic of knees LMAO ➥ ⥣ 1.9k ⥥
piss-k1nk0219 • 2h yall are about to have the awkwardest family get togethers ever lmao
➥ Reply ⥣ 910 ⥥
bigsnowballs0813 • 4h $5 and an iced coffee for the pc take it or leave it
➥ Reply ⥣ 748 ⥥
femboyluvr0701 • 1h are u gonna set the cousin's car on fire too
➥ Reply ⥣ 639 ⥥
justgirlythings-arson119 • 1h probably not he’s very good at putting out fires :(  ➥ ⥣ 482 ⥥
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melminli · 3 days ago
Note
I LOVEDDDDDDD your Thanos “bang bang bang” post and it made me very curious abt how they know eo and stuff and like I’d love to read more about it in general if you don’t mind. It’s so great and I love your writing <333 have a fun day / night 🫶🏻
BANG BANG BANG ll
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summary - thanos was always just such an easy person to argue with. you really hated the guy and that was something that was never going to change, even if your life was on the line and it fucking was.
pairing: (thanos) choi su-bong x fem. reader
word count: 1.8k
contains: violence, angst, death, drug use and addiction, dark content - just usual squid game stuff really
a/n: ty so much! this turned out kinda freaky but that is because thanos is a freak so, i didn't really have a choice.
prev. | masterlist
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There was an eerie silence among all the participants for the first few seconds after the first death happened. The realization of what this meant for everyone present slowly sank in, and you thought that maybe the crazy man with all his screaming, wasn't quite as crazy as you originally thought. The real madman was probably the person somewhere upstairs or - you didn't know exactly where, but you knew that they were watching you.
“Don't move!” His voice shouted again, but this time with a completely different force. It may be that this was the most logical conclusion one could draw from what had just happened, but some seemed to throw all logic out of the window as soon as the fear of death hit. It only took one person to panic to set off a domino effect and from one second to the next loud gunshots could be heard, following the fearful screams of one person after another. The participants were being slaughtered like frightened animals in a cage, what kind of sick game was really going on here?
You too began to tremble as you looked down at the floor, dissociating and trying to ignore your surroundings as best you could. You had to stop yourself from flinching when the person right next to you was killed, even as you felt his still warm blood covering your cheek, even as a small river of it started pooling around your foot. You were most likely going to leave a trace of him all over the ground as soon as you started walking again - whoever he was. It didn't take very long for everyone who had moved to be shot, maybe half a minute - and yet it must have been the worst half minute of your life so far.
“Don't you dare move,” Thanos said in a voice you weren't used to hearing from him. “I'm serious, don't make me mad.”
You just looked at his back from behind, with a tense posture while you tried to regain control of your breathing again. Finally, there was complete silence on the pitch again. Even if it wasn't an entirely welcome silence.
The voice from the loudspeakers began to speak again and you already knew that this would be a voice that would haunt you in your nightmares. “Let me repeat: You can move forward while the tagger shouts, Green light, red light. If your movement is detected afterward, you will be eliminated.”
Ah, so that's what you meant with eliminated. A bit literal but no biggie! The game continued, but no one really dared to move a muscle even when the puppet looked away. You then saw Thanos shift slightly out of the corner of your eye and noticed that he was pulling his cross necklace out of his t-shirt. Safe to say, that you could barely believe what you were seeing right before your very eyes. You've got to be kidding me, they took everything we had from us, but he was allowed to keep that old thing? “Are you seriously going to take that stuff now?” you whispered in disbelief but didn't really judge him for it. You were this close to just laughing out loud at the absurdity of the scene, but you didn't.
“You don't have to be jealous, sweetheart,” he replied with slightly shaky hands as he stopped his movement abruptly when the doll finished talking. He just stared longingly at the colorful pills in front of him. “I don't mind sharing with you, you know that.”
You sighed inwardly at the thing you were about to do. You had been clean for maybe about six years by now and quitting drugs of any kind overnight was really fucking hard - definitely one of the hardest things you had to do in your life. On the other hand, your life was still as shitty as before, the only difference being that you were now consciously depressed and unhappy, so who cares? You could die every second anyway. “Thanks.” you just said after taking the pill out of his hand and threw the thing as quickly as possible in your mouth as soon as the doll looked away. Yeah, you were the biggest hypocrite on earth, old news.
It only took maybe a few seconds after that for you to feel the effects of the pill and then finally, all the stress started to dissipate. Your muscles relaxed, all the shouting about whatever felt like a soft pillow hugging you and the weird laying positions of the dead around you suddenly seemed incredibly funny. These were really strong pills, you could practically feel your whole body tingling. “Why are they all suddenly forming a line?” you asked with a grin and Thanos just hummed, not knowing the answer himself. “No idea, but watch this,” he said and waited until the puppet had turned towards you to push the person next to him, causing everyone in front of them to fall over too. “Ding! You lost,” he told them while wiggling his eyebrows and smirking after he watched them get shot.
You didn't even try to stifle your laughter at the scene. “You really are such an asshole.” you replied, shoving him aside this time after the doll averted its gaze. You then ran away as fast and as far away as you could so that he couldn't take revenge on you for what you had just done. However, you quickly stopped moving with both hands in the air as soon as the girlish voice emitted red light as if you were surrendering to her. You stifled your grin and pretty much failed when you noticed a slightly older woman standing relatively close to you. “Hey, are you trying to hide behind me to use me as a shield?” you spoke out without moving your mouth much and watched as she began to sweat more after you realized what she was doing. Still, she didn't pay you any further attention. “And now you're ignoring me too?” you spat out annoyed and grabbed her by the arm when you were free to move and pulled her in front of you against her will.
She tried to fight you off but you forced her further forward while she tried to defend herself. “You're older than me, aren't you ashamed of yourself?” You asked her and stopped walking before the robot's face turned towards you.
Number 57, who was still resisting your grip, stumbled a little to the side when you suddenly let go of her. She was about to howl in delight when she noticed how everyone else stood still. “No…” she mumbled out fearfully. “It's because of that bitch! I didn't -” she tried to defend herself to someone as she looked around the room, but her head caught the bullet before she could even finish her sentence.
“I may be a bitch, but at least I'm still alive.” you sang to her dead body on the floor before running past her. You didn't know how much time was left, but you had almost made it to the finish line anyway. You stopped with your back to the robot girl this time and it didn't take you long to spot the purple hair in the crowd. “Su-bong!” you shouted his name, since you had somehow gotten separated while running. You waited until he yelled back with a what?! “Last one there, gets fucked in the ass!” you yelled out without any shame or filter and saw his facial expression turn serious at the challenge. “Let's Go!”
The whole game went by relatively quickly once you took the pill from Thanos. It was actually quite fun, you thought to yourself as you both jumped around like two crazy people with grinning faces, waving your arms around wildly. I know it's not socially acceptable to say this, but I fucking love doing drugs! It was like everything around you was happening in slow motion and all the decisions you made felt foggy, like you didn't even realize what you were doing.
You loved being this person, it felt great to forget everything and just - not think. “I have won! No, really! You crossed the line two steps after me, I saw it!” you exclaimed before Thanos could object to a single thing. “Didn't anyone else see that?” you exclaimed in disbelief as if the others weren't busy staying alive while watching several others die right before their faces. You didn't care about the looks they gave you as you waved your hand. “No, they definitely saw it. I won.”
Thanos just gave in with a heavy sigh and a roll of his eyes. “Yeah yeah, I'm getting fucked in the ass which is gay, very funny.” he just mumbled to himself annoyed, and continued to avoid your gaze, but couldn't help grin again when you slapped him on the shoulder laughing. “Hey, why did we stop doing all this again?” he asked you when he couldn't remember the reason. All he knew was that he hadn't had this much fun in a long time, even though he knew that he always had a great time with you - no matter what.
You laughed. “Oh, that's because you promised me that we'd both get clean together, and then you spent the money I gave you for rehab on more drugs behind my back. “ you laughed along with him, even if Thanos frowned a little at the memory and you started to smile forcedly after remembering again how he had betrayed you. “Or what was it again? Was it something about that Youtuber you told me about…” you mumbled to yourself obliviously, feeling any sense of happiness begin to fade. You finally gave up, the details weren't that important anyway. “It doesn't really matter though, right? In any case, you used the money for something else, whatever it was. Even though you knew how hard I worked for it - hell, I didn't even eat most days to scrape it together, man.” you stated while you looked him in the face, even though he averted his gaze from you. “That's just fucked up dude.”
Exactly. You actually hated being this person. You might not remember it right now, but you would as soon as the effects of the pill wore off, which hopefully wasn't soon. You really hoped it wasn't soon, because you didn't want to be aware of anything that had happened today.
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mayanneaa · 2 days ago
Text
domestic - ʀᴀꜰᴇ ᴄᴀᴍᴇʀᴏɴ.
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PAIRING : rafe cameron x reader
SUMMARY : rafe finally experiences domestic life with you.
WARNING(S) : not proofread
A/N : celebrating 2025 with softish rafe hihi (divider by @roseraris)
WC : 1.1k
masterlist.
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one.
"You're doing it wrong."
You look up at Rafe, the shirt still in your hands. He's sitting on the couch, a pile of clothes next to him.
The day’s finally come—you two had to take care of the laundry. That’s how you ended up on the floor, a big basket by your side.
"Enlighten me, then."
Rafe slides down on the floor and takes the fabric from you. "You have to fold it like this," he says, folding it neatly, his face almost screaming ‘bored’.
Sun’s shyly sneaking into the living room, casting a mosaic of lights. All you can smell is the fresh laundry and Rafe's cologne, now that he’s so close. Musk and sandalwood fill the space between you two.
There are no screaming kids outside, only the faint sound of crashing waves from the beach. It feels so… right.
“What?” Rafe’s voice pulls you out of wonder, and heat rises to your cheeks when you realize you've been staring at him the whole time, “Folding clothes is philosophical for you?”
“Asshole." You playfully push his shoulder as he puts the folded shirt on one of the little towers you created. "It's just nice. You know, doing things like this with you."
He shrugs, turning away so that you can't see his face. Too bad you caught the flush creeping up his neck.
"C'mon, admit it!" You press, nudging him slightly.
"Admit what?"
You smile as he furrows his brows, "Admit you like it too!"
Rafe snorts and pulls you into his lap, making your heart flutter, "Fine. I like it. Happy?"
"You have to mean it, Rafe!" you tease, a toothy grin spread on your face.
He rolls his eyes, the corners of his mouth twitching as he leans in and captures your lips. You wrap your arms around his neck, savoring the sweet taste of cherries on his lips.
When you finally pull away, Rafe's voice comes out not louder than a whisper, "Do you believe me now?"
You rest your forehead against his, a giggle escaping your lips. "Yeah. Maybe I do."
"Good," Rafe says looking over your shoulder, "Because we have a ton of work left."
You groan and bury your face in the crook of his neck. "You're the worst."
two.
You were delighted when Rafe finally agreed to go grocery shopping with you. Such a small thing, but it made you giddy regardless. Usually, he'd just order it straight to your door. It was nice, sure, but you missed the feeling of walking around the isles, looking at the list you made back home, and picking out the products.
That’s how you ended up in this little shop, standing in front of the ice cream fridge. The lights are quietly humming over your head, and the smell of fresh baked goods is lingering from the bakery section. Rafe’s beside you, his gaze set on the different packaging.
“Which one should we get?” he asks.
You sneak a glance at the piece of paper in your hand. “I mean… We technically shouldn’t get any.”
These words make him turn his head to you, a judging look on his face. “You’re no fun.”
“Oh? Well, since you’re such a party girl, pick something out while I go and search for the rest.”
Rafe huffs and you move to the other side of the store, away from the freezing air that pinches your skin. There aren't many people, other than an older lady picking out the best tomatoes and some kids debating on the candy they’ll buy.
Soon enough, your checklist is almost complete.
“Baby,” you hear from behind and you turn around to Rafe carrying three cans of ice cream.
You arch your brows as he puts them in the cart.
“I got a classic, which is vanilla,” he starts, pointing at each one, “Then this one, because you love it, and the peanut butter was new or something. We can try it out together!”
“And when do you plan on eating all that?”
He wraps his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer with a proud smirk, “Oh, I’ve already thought about that, baby. We’ll finish the 'Gossip Girl' or whatever it's called—"
You interrupt him, getting on your tiptoes and placing a soft kiss on his cheek.
"See? Groceries are fun, told ya."
Rafe's eyes soften before he chuckles and snatches the list out of your hands. "Maybe. But we have to get the whipped cream first. Oh, we can also get some coke—"
"Well, if you'll pay we can get anything."
Rafe snorts as he pushes the cart, keeping you snug against his side. "Obviously. C'mon!"
three.
The steady rhythm of rain tapping on the open window fills the bedroom. The day's coming to an end, and you finally find a moment for yourself.
You curl up on your bed, hiding between the fluffy blankets and pillows with a book in your hand. The candles on your nightstand flicker softly, the wisps of smoke mixing with the steam rising from the cup nearby.
"Move, please." You hear Rafe mumble as he climbs the bed, an oversized shirt hanging off his body.
He settles, resting his head on your chest, strong arms wrapped around you. Then, he lets out a long sigh, like a puppy after a long day of doing nothing.
You glance down at him—his eyelids flutter, and pout forms on his lips. Your heart softens despite yourself. "The weather drained you out, huh?"
Rafe lazily shakes his head, "Not really."
He isn’t even sure what it is about this moment that soothes him, but he never wants it to end. When he's in your room, the sweet scent of your candles filling up his head, all he wants to do is to lay down with, or rather on you. To feel the warmth of your body, he longs to listen to your voice.
You smile, the silence falling between you feels comfortable. You read through the pages, becoming more invested.
Rafe absentmindedly traces lines on your blanket. He listens to the rain, and it syncs with the steady heartbeat beneath his ear.
"I like this." Before he can think again, the words slip out of his lips, breaking the silence.
You rest the book on him, giggling. "What?"
"Being here with you, Ms. Giggles Mgoo." He raises his head to look at you. There's a flicker in his eyes, and it doesn't come from the flame beside you.
"No way," you tease, and he rolls his eyes, "The Rafe Cameron tells me he likes spending time with me..."
He pouts, and you can't hold your laugh anymore.
You lean in, peppering his nose with quick pecks. Rafe smiles, his cheeks painted in a delicate shade of red.
"You're getting soft, baby." You say between the kisses, and you feel the heat rising to his face under your lips.
"Shut up..."
You press one last kiss, this time to his lips. It's so rare—to see the softer, quieter Rafe that for now only exists here, with you. And you wouldn’t trade it for anything.
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extinctlesspains · 2 days ago
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Something about how unhinged the Salesman/Recruiter does something to me. What if the reader is also a recruiter for the games? She's gotten used to his insane persona and knows how to handle it since they have to communicate about work. They'll often play games during these chats.
Sorry too many ideas floating!
𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑇𝑤𝑜 [𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑆𝑎𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑚𝑎𝑛]
.・。.・゜✭・
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.・。.・゜✭・
ʀᴇᴏ̨ᴜᴇsᴛᴇᴅ:ʏᴇs ᴏʀ ɴᴏ
ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ᴛʜᴇ sᴀʟᴇsᴍᴀɴ x ғᴇᴍ! ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: ʀᴏᴍᴀɴᴄᴇ
sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ:ʜᴇ sᴍɪʀᴋᴇᴅ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛɪʟᴇ ғʟɪᴘᴘᴇᴅ ʜɪs ʏᴇᴛ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ, ᴛʜᴇ sʜᴀʀᴘ ᴄʀᴀᴄᴋ ᴏғ ᴘᴀᴘᴇʀ ᴏɴ ᴡᴏᴏᴅ ᴇᴄʜᴏɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀғᴇ́, ʙᴜᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴏɴᴄᴇ, ʜɪs ᴡᴏʀᴅs ʜᴇʟᴅ ɴᴏ ᴛᴇᴀsɪɴɢ ᴇᴅɢᴇ. "ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ɢᴀᴍᴇ, "ʜᴇ sᴀɪᴅ, ʜɪs ɢᴀᴢᴇ ʟɪɴɢᴇʀɪɴɢ, "ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ɪ'ᴠᴇ ʙᴇᴇɴ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀs ᴀʟʟ ᴀʟᴏɴɢ."
ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇs: ᴛᴇɴsɪᴏɴ, ɢᴀᴍʙʟɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴘᴜʙʟɪᴄ.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ 
The café was bustling, but the hum of life around you barely registered. Your focus remained on the chair across from you, still empty despite the time ticking by. He was late, as usual.
You stirred your coffee, letting the bitter scent ground you. Working with him was a test of patience and resilience, but it was also... oddly thrilling. The Salesman, you didn't know his name since he was very isolated, was chaos incarnate, unpredictable in the worst—and sometimes best—ways.
“Miss me?”
You didn’t jump at his voice; you were too used to his dramatic entrances by now. He slid into the chair across from you, his ever-present smirk firmly in place. His dark suit was immaculate, the red tie a glaring slash of color that caught the light.
“You’re late,” you said, lifting your coffee for a sip.
“Fashionably so,” he quipped, leaning back and lacing his fingers behind his head. “But I see you’ve kept my seat warm. How thoughtful.”
“Hardly.” You set the cup down with a faint smirk of your own. “If you’d been much later, I’d have left.”
“Ah, but you didn’t.” He leaned forward, his sharp gaze locking onto yours. “You never do.”
The weight of his words hung between you for a moment, but you refused to give him the satisfaction of a reaction. Instead, you gestured to the briefcase he’d placed on the table.
“Are we doing this, or are you just here to waste my time?”
His grin widened as he reached into the case, pulling out a familiar bundle wrapped in cloth. Unfolding it revealed two ddakji tiles—bright squares of red and blue paper, their edges slightly worn from use.
“You know the drill,” he said, setting them on the table. “Winner takes all.”
“And by ‘all,’ you mean…?”
He chuckled. “Coffee, pride, the satisfaction of victory. Take your pick.”
You sighed, already reaching for one of the tiles. “Fine. One round.”
The first smack of the tile hitting the table drew a few curious glances from nearby patrons. The Salesman’s opening move was quick and sharp, flipping your tile with ease.
“Your turn,” he said, lounging back in his chair.
You studied his expression, the faint flicker of amusement in his eyes. He was too confident, as always. But you’d learned how to read him—his subtle tells, the little quirks that betrayed his intentions.
With a precise flick of your wrist, your tile hit his at just the right angle. It flipped cleanly, landing with the blue side up.
“Hmm,” you said, feigning indifference. “Looks like you’re buying the coffee.”
For a moment, he just stared at the upturned tile. Then, to your surprise, he laughed—a genuine, full-throated laugh that drew more glances from the other customers.
“Well played,” he said, clapping his hands together. “You’ve been practicing.”
“Or maybe you’re just slipping,” you replied, leaning back with a smirk.
He narrowed his eyes, but the smile on his face didn’t falter. “Careful, recruiter. Pride comes before the fall."
As the game ended, the conversation shifted seamlessly into work. He described his latest target with the enthusiasm of a storyteller spinning a particularly twisted tale.
“Mid-thirties, father of two, drowning in debt,” he said, ticking the details off on his fingers. “His wife just left him, and his parents refuse to help. Classic case. He’ll fold like wet paper.”
You nodded, though something about his tone made you uneasy. “And what happens when he doesn’t make it?”
“That’s not our concern, is it?” He leaned forward, his smile taking on a sharper edge. “We’re just here to open the door. What happens after they walk through it is up to them.”
You hated how easily he dismissed it, but you couldn’t deny the truth in his words. Still, the gnawing discomfort refused to leave.
“You’re thinking too much,” he said, watching you closely. “It’s a dangerous habit in this line of work.”
“Someone has to think,” you shot back.
His grin widened. “Touché.”
The tension between you had always been an undercurrent, a quiet hum that neither of you acknowledged outright. But tonight, it felt sharper, closer to the surface.
“You know,” he said suddenly, breaking the silence, “you’re the only one who’s ever beaten me at ddakji more than once.”
“Maybe you’re not as good as you think you are,” you replied, keeping your tone light.
“Or maybe,” he said, his gaze steady and uncomfortably intense, “you’re the only one who knows how to play my game.”
The words hung in the air, heavy and electric. For a moment, you wondered if he’d crossed a line, but then he leaned back, the smirk returning to his face as if nothing had happened.
“Another round?” he asked, already reaching for the tiles.
You hesitated, the weight of his earlier words still lingering. But then you nodded, picking up your tile.
“Fine,” you said. “One more round.”
This time, the game wasn’t just about tiles. It was about control, power, and something else you couldn’t quite name.
The tiles hit the table with sharp, precise smacks, the sound echoing louder in your ears with each round. Your focus narrowed, every move calculated, every flick of his wrist analyzed.
Smack!
Your tile flipped his for the second time that night.
He stared at the table, then back at you, his expression unreadable. For a moment, you thought he might be angry, but then he smiled—a real, genuine smile that softened the sharp edges of his face.
“Congratulations,” he said, his voice quieter than before. “Looks like you win again.”
The words felt like more than just an acknowledgment of the game.
And as you sat there, the faint buzz of the café fading into the background, you realized something.
Maybe you weren’t just playing his game. Maybe he was playing yours, too.
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producedbysohyun · 3 days ago
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Shark Week
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Squid game x reader hcs
Summary: How the people in squid game would react to you being on your period (all separate)
Includes: Thanos, Se-mi, Dae-ho, Myung-gi, Jun-ho, Hyun-ju (non!squid game au)
Warnings: We are pretending for this one they aren’t all in major debt 🤗, a little suggestive on thanos’s part, If you’re scared of periods don’t read I guess?? 😭
a/n: this goes out to all my people who have to deal with periods! We are in this together 😔✊
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Thanos
Ya you’re out of luck with this one 😔
Probably the worst person to have with you during your period
Definitely trys to rap his way into making you feel better but just fails miserably
“I know another way to make you feel better 😏”
“No”
“Ok 😞” *walks off with yet again another failed attempt*
If you asked him to go out and by you pads he would probably come back with those small cotton pads for your face
I mean he’s trying 😭
The type to ask “are you on your period” whenever you’re in a bad mood and is met with a slap every time
Doesn’t know what else to do so he probably just goes even more broke buying a bunch of food for you
(“With what money” we all yell in unison 🗣️)
Tolerates watching your “stupid” shows that you like just to make you happy but ends up being really interested
Se-mi
One of the best people to have with you
Deals with her period really well so she doesn’t really understand your pain but she gets the other things
Cuddles you all day!!
Literally turns into your slave
I feel like she would tease you about something and then accidentally make you cry because you’re overly sensitive
She feels so bad and you better believe she’s gonna watch what she says for the remainder of your period
You guys watch shows all day and just eat junk food
*stares at you dying in pain* “is it that bad?”
*starts crying*
“What- nooo baby I’m sorry” *cue her kissing all over your face*
I’m in love with her
Dae-ho
*sigh* I love him
Dude has four sisters so you are in luck
He definitely knows what to do
Gives you so much cuddles
He’s probably extra clingy to you during this time but if you tell him you want space he definitely respects it
If you’re having cramps he’ll give you tummy rubs 😔
I need him so bad wjdvjwwjwdjwkwj
Lowkey gets a bit freaked out when you start having mood swings
So he’s definitely careful with what he says not that he could ever hurt your feelings anyways
Is there to comfort you when you start crying over dumb stuff and NEVER makes fun of you for it
Gets you all your favorite snacks!!!
Ugh I need him
Myung-gi
Lowkey avoids you at first
Confused pt.2
He gets the hang of it pretty quickly tho
“Are you on your period” pt.2
Slapped pt.2
Poor boy didn’t even mean it in a bad way he was just genuinely curious 😞
Secretly looks up what to do
You guys binge watch shows together the whole day while cuddling
Try’s not giggle if you start crying over the show
And if you see him laughing it only makes you cry more
“No no Jagiya I’m sorrrryyy”
*Kisses your face till you stop crying*
Besides the laughing part he’s not a terrible person to have 👍
Jun-ho
Gives you your space
Kinda just lets you do your own thing but if you specifically need something he’ll do it for you
He’s up for giving you cuddles but you gotta ask him cause he doesn’t wanna do anything to upset you :(
Weirdly calm about the whole thing
Sends you texts asking how you’re feeling throughout the day as he can’t be there with you the whole time due to his job
Very very patient when you have mood swings
Buys you food pt.3
Overall not too bad
Hyun-ju
She definitely knows what to do
Very educated
Cuddles pt.4!!!!!!
Does everything she possible can to make you feel better cause she hates seeing you in pain
If somebody upsets you she will personally go and deal with them herself girl doesn’t play around
Constantly checks up on you asking if there’s anything she can do
Literally never makes you cry
She’s so gentle with you 🙁
10/10 person to have when your on your period
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a/n: I hope you guys enjoyed! This was a lot of fun to make!! Please send in requests because I don’t know what you guys want to read 😔
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osarina · 2 days ago
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ᡣ𐭩 LOVERS ROCK
FEATURING: dazai osamu
SUMMARY: there are very few things that leave dazai osamu at a loss for answers. you are one of them. more specifically, it's your relationship (is this a relationship?) with him that has him so disconcerted, and dazai is getting to his breaking point.
(wordcount: 3.6k; nsfw [kind of, very suggestive so will label nsfw], ada!reader, dazai has SEVERE trust issues & paranoia, this is set like half a year after he joined the ada, dazai also has a bad relationship with sex that is mentioned in his narration, he is terrible at communication too, accidentally hurts reader a little [nothing major])
AUTHOR'S NOTES: hiiiiiii guys <.< so i'm actually really proud of this ehehe. this is a universe that i'm tempted to expand on like wykyk, but we'll see.
Dazai hates giving up control. 
Ever since he was a kid, he’s been hyper-independent. First with his family, because they were never around and he had to learn to be self-sufficient otherwise he’d die a slow, painful death. Then in the Port Mafia, he quickly learned that asking for help is a weakness and being dependent on others is a vulnerability that people would take advantage of to subvert his influence and usurp his position as an underboss. As long as he’s remembered, it was all but a death sentence to rely on any other than himself. 
It wasn't until he became a member of the Agency that he finally began to allow himself to depend on others—banking on Ranpo and his mind, Kunikida and his ideals, Yosano and her tenacity. But even then, he never allowed himself to lose complete control over a situation, drawing things out in a way that would always leave him with a firm hand guiding the chess board. 
Until he met you, at least.
He wasn’t sure what made you so different—he still isn’t entirely sure, it’s a thought that frequently plagues him, and because of it, he can never allow himself to be fully comfortable with you. You joined the Agency a month after him with lips that spoke pretty words and gave him even prettier smiles. You’d been kind to everyone, but Dazai likes to think you were especially kind to him. Maybe it was just his imagination, but Dazai liked the idea of it.
Well, he didn’t at first. 
In fact, he was rather hostile to it. To you. The longing he felt for the casual, soft touches you laid upon the other members of the Agency felt more like a weakness than anything else. It scared him. He’d never desired anything of the sort before, he’d always been okay on his own—thrived in it, really—and now he was suddenly seeking you out at all hours of the day, and he didn’t even fully understand why. Every time he sought you out, it ended poorly with him saying something uncalled for and your expression twisting as you tried to hide your hurt. 
And yet he still continued to seek you out. He made the same mistake over and over again: constantly forcing himself into your space after getting jealous watching you doll out casual affection to the other detectives, waiting for you to give him the same attention, and then lashing out in some manner when you finally did.
He supposed it didn’t help that Dazai was uncomfortable in general with people touching him, which naturally made him even more hostile because why was he longing for something that made him uncomfortable? 
He also still isn’t sure how you managed to break through all of his walls—or why you even persisted when it became clear that he was at best incompetent when it comes to dealing with real emotions, and at worst, borderline malicious. 
But you did. And it scared him. Scares him.
Dazai lets out a shaky breath when he feels your lips ghost against his neck, fingers twisting the sheets below him. Your hands are sliding against his sides, gentle and soothing, and a part of him wants to melt into the sheets while another part of him wants to flip the two of you around, press you back down into the mattress and rip control over the situation back from you.
As if you can sense his conflict—maybe you can, Dazai has come to realize that unlike everyone else at the Agency, who he can fool with his mask of exaggerated dramatics and clownlike behavior, that you had somehow learned how to see right through him—you pause for the sparest moment and trace your lips back up his neck to brush them against his own, soft and comforting, as if to soothe his discord.
And it works somehow. Dazai doesn’t know how you do it because he can’t even quell his own mind when it starts to spin out of control, but the brush of your lips against his is enough to ground him again. 
“Everything okay?” you ask quietly, eyes searching his face for the answers that he knew his lips might not give.
“Yeah,” he breathes out, voice rough and cracking over the word. 
He thinks maybe a part of it is the way you always check on him to make sure he’s doing alright. For Dazai, sex has only ever been transactional—he was young when he was first carted off to a whorehouse so he could be taught how to use his body for intel and other miscellaneous advantages. No matter how hard he tried to enjoy it, he always found it to be underwhelming at best and loathsome at worst. And he did try to enjoy it, he forced himself to seek out women in his free time to try to learn to enjoy the activity that so many other people seem to find comfort and pleasure in. 
It wasn’t until you that he could.
His first time with you was earth shattering. He’s not exaggerating when he says it completely altered his perspective on intimacy. It was embarrassing, almost—he remembers giving you quick, flirty smiles, and he remembers the sly comments he whispered to you at the bar the members of the Agency were at to celebrate Yosano’s birthday. 
He knew that morning that he wanted you in his bed by nightfall—partly because he thought it would get you out of his system, that maybe all he needed was a good fuck to stop acting like he was brainless whenever you were around, and partly because he was curious. He was curious to know if that genuine demeanor of yours continued behind closed doors, or if it was all just a mask you liked to put up in public. 
Dazai’s hands were on you before the two of you even left for the night—they were creeping up your inner thigh, lingering on your bicep, he was resting his chin on your shoulder as he stood behind you, warding off any man that might try to approach you with cold looks you couldn’t catch. Eventually, like he planned, you asked him if he wanted to go back to your apartment, and Dazai agreed, of course, eager to get his questions answered. Eager to free himself of whatever shackles you’ve put on him.
And it all went downhill from there.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” you ask again, frown deepening and hands stilling on his waist when you don’t find an answer you like on his face.
Dazai tries to play it off—you’re here for sex, not all of his unstable thoughts. He gives you a practiced smile and slips his hand under your shirt to rest on your lower back, pulling you firmer against him—an easy tactic, one of the first he learned to distract his partner when he slips up.
He should have known better than to think you would fall for it.
Instead of returning to the lingering line of kisses you were leaving on his neck, you sit back to study him, and Dazai feels seen. He shifts under your scrutinizing gaze, averting his eyes to the ceiling and counting the seconds that pass as he waits for you to ask that dreaded question. 
“What's wrong?” you ask him quietly.
Dazai can evade it. He knows that he can—even if the sex is ruined, because he knows you’re not going to have sex with him if you think something is wrong, he can evade this question by refusing to answer. You never press it, although sometimes your lips curve down in a disappointed frown that makes him feel even worse than before.
But Dazai finds himself hesitating.
“I-“ he starts to say before cutting himself off abruptly, horrified by the realization that he was just about to admit to you what he was thinking. “Nothing.” 
The anticipation that had sprung to your eyes when he started to speak dissipates when he blows you off, and it makes his chest tighten. He feels your thighs tense and knows you’re about to get off of him, so his hands fly to your hips to keep you in place.
“Something,” he corrects, voice just a little too raspy for comfort. “… Something.”
You settle back down on top of him, tilting your head to the side. 
“Tell me?” you offer quietly, your hands drop to his arms, sliding up and down the bandages that cover his forearms slowly. Soothingly. He hates it.
“I just don’t understand this,” Dazai admits. “It’s… confusing.”
It's possibly the first time he’s ever spoken these words out loud. It’s a weakness he’s never allowed anyone to be aware of—even when Dazai has no idea what’s going on, he’s careful to put up an impenetrable facade of confidence, one that even the keenest eyes can’t see through.
And here he is, bare of masks and facades, admitting his weakness plainly to someone who could easily take advantage of it.
Oh.
“This as in…?” you prompt with a pondering frown.
Is that it?
“This,” he repeats more insistently as his mind races. “Us.”
You, he accuses silently.
You have the ability to destroy him. Dazai realizes, disconcerted, that this is what is confusing him. He's allowed himself to be weak in front of you. He's lowered all of his guards. He's let you in through his many walls of defenses. You’ve settled down in the treacherous beating thing in his chest that he’s tried to rip out too many times to count, and Dazai waits for you to take advantage of it. He waits for this to go wrong. Waits for you to prove yourself to be a Trojan Horse in the form of dazzling smiles and a beautiful face. 
But you don’t, and that’s what Dazai just can’t understand. He doesn’t understand what you’re getting out of this—he knows what he’s getting out of it. He’s getting comfort, he’s able to pretend he’s capable of being loved, he gets you. But you’re not getting anything out of this, so he feels like he’s just been biding time before the other shoe drops.
“… What about us do you not understand?” You sound perplexed, and it agitates Dazai. Worse, you can tell it agitates him because immediately you run your thumb over the pulse point on his wrist to soothe him. You add quickly with a small smile, “I'm not understanding now, help me?”
It is beyond disconcerting that even though he knows it was a ploy to distract and soothe him, it works anyway. Dazai needs to do something about this.
“What do you get out of this?” Dazai decides to ask the question plainly instead of dancing around his words, partially because of the agitation and partially because he just needs an answer. Desperately. “What do you get out of what’s going on between us? I don't understand why you keep agreeing to meet me, why you initiate it sometimes. I need to know what it is you get."
Sex is transactional—it always is. Each party has to get something out of it, and if you don't know what the other is getting, then you have made a perilous mistake somewhere along the line. Dazai has known this since the beginning, but he allowed himself too long to bask blindly in the comfort of your arms and bed. He can’t keep doing this without knowing what you’re getting, It’ll come back to haunt him.
You’re still confused by his question even with the explanation, he can see it in the way the thoughts race behind your eyes as you try to piece it together. 
Eventually you settle on a smile that’s almost playful as you answer with, “You?”
Dazai’s frown deepens at your words, his expression becomes a bit colder. He thinks you’re evading the question because you don’t want to answer it, and that’s dangerous. You joined the Armed Detective Agency not long after him—were you a plant sent to get close to him by one of his old enemies? By Mori? His thoughts start to spiral dangerously. These are questions he should’ve been having months ago when you first joined the Agency, not now. 
“What are you really getting?” His grip on your hips tightens. “Tell me. Stop avoiding the question.”
Your expression becomes a bit more alarmed when he closes off from you, he thinks maybe his grip on your hips might be painful from your wince but he can’t afford to let go until he has his answer. 
“You, Dazai,” you say again, more insistently this time. “I get you. I get to spend time with you. be with you. That’s what I get.”
“But why?” Dazai presses, raising his voice, holding you tighter. He is hurting you now, he can tell from the way you try to bat his hands away, but he couldn’t let go if he wanted to. His blood pressure is rising as he realizes how badly he might have messed up. All of Ango’s efforts—Odasaku’s last request—all down the drain because of one mistake. “Why? What information are you trying to get? Who sent you? Who are you work-“
“What?” you demand. The confusion in your eyes is almost believable—Dazai thinks you must’ve been sent by someone important if you’re this good of an actress. His thoughts track back to Mori and his mind starts to fog with fury. “Who sent me? What are you-Dazai-I want you because I care about you. I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 
The fog clears, Dazai stares at you blankly, hands loosening on your hips. He's not sure he heard you correctly, so he says: “What did you just say?”
Your expression softens a bit, and you repeat, “I care about you. I want you because I care about you.”
“No, you don’t,” Dazai says immediately. Instinctually.
“Yes, I do.” Dazai has never seen you get irritated before, but your face twists when he instantly denies your words. “I do, Dazai.”
“You don’t,” he insists. “You can’t. You don’t even know me, you don't care about me.”
He thinks he almost would have preferred that you had some ulterior motive to this. He hates the way his chest swells with hope—hope is dangerous, more dangerous than any other emotion. Fear, anger, sadness, none of it compares to the light that tries to bloom within his rotted chest. He tries to cut it off before it can spread, but it’s notoriously hard to snuff out; it clings to anything it can get a hold on even as he tries to push it away. 
The idea is… more tempting than he expected. It’s concerning, that should be enough to clear his head, but it’s not. His fingers cling to your shirt desperately, he searches your face, trying to find the sparest indication that you may be lying.
He finds none.
Still, Dazai knows better. He knows this won’t last. you’ll find out who he was, all of the things he did, and then you’ll leave him. You’ll see him for what he is, and you’ll leave him. This will never last. 
Nothing good ever does for him. 
“But I do care about you,” you insist, and you’re cruel now, because you reach out to cup his cheek and Dazai leans into your touch. He can’t help himself from it. “I care about you deeply, Dazai.”
“You can’t,” he repeats, and to his horror, his voice wavers. “You don’t know who I am, you don’t know what I’ve done, and when you do-“
“We all have skeletons in our closet, Dazai,” you interrupt him quietly. “I don't think there’s a single ability user out there that doesn’t. I don't need to know your past to know I care about you.”
That’s not true, he wants to say, but can’t force the words out. Instead, he says hoarsely, “It would change how you see me. I'm not who you think I am. I’m-”
A monster. A demon. His blood is black—has been since the day he was born, will be until the day he dies. He is not someone who should be cared for. He's someone who should be left to rot, someone the world would be better off without. He doesn’t deserve this, not when there are so many other people in the world who are unfailingly good and do deserve it. 
“It won’t,” you say again, but Dazai knows it’s not true, you don’t know what you’re talking about. You don’t know how awful he is. You don’t give him the chance to protest though. “I care about who you are today. I care about who you are tomorrow. The day after tomorrow. Not who you were months ago. The past is the past, Dazai, leave it there.”
“It's not that simple,” he rasps. 
“It can be,” you say softly, tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear, “if you let it.”
“It can’t be that simple,” he disagrees. There’s an odd lilt to the voice—pleading, almost, begging you not to give him hope only to rip it away when the truth inevitably comes to light. “It can’t.”
“It can for us,” you tell him again, and Dazai finds himself believing you. Wanting to believe you. Wanting to believe things can just be that simple. That easy. 
“Why?” Dazai breathes out, eyes searching your face for answers. “Why me? Why not someone…”
Someone better. Someone good. Someone deserving. 
“Because you’re you,” you say like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, you lean down to ghost your lips against his and it fogs his brain with a pleasant warmth he’s only ever felt with you. “Do I need a reason more than that?”
Dazai wants to say yes, because him being him is a reason for you to not want him. He’s despicable, he’s cruel, he lashed out at you for weeks all the while forcing himself into your space because he wanted to be near you but didn’t understand why. 
“I love your smile,” you say, thumb running along his bottom lip, “and I love even more when I’m the reason for it.”
“But-“
“And I love your eyes,” you continue, fingers trailing up his face to trace under his eyes. “I think they’re the prettiest shade of brown I’ve ever seen.”
“I know that’s not true,” he rasps—he knows very well that his eyes are unnerving, too black and too empty. People have been unable to look him in the eye for long even when he was a kid. “I-“
“But most of all, it’s just you,” you say softly, cupping his cheeks with both of your hands. “You make me happy. I like being around you. I always look forward to the time we get to spend together—missions, at work, after work. I’ll take you in whatever way I can get, Dazai.”
You don’t let him avert his gaze this time, you force him to look at you, force him to see the truth of your words reflected in the adoration on your face. No one has ever looked at him like this before, and it makes him feel bare. Seen. He’s always felt seen with you, but never like this.
“I was… mean to you.” He still tries to argue with you, lashes fluttering shut. “I was cruel for months because-“
You laugh at him. “Mean? You were like a puppy trying to snap at my hand to scare me off.”
Dazai gapes. “A puppy?” he demands, seriously offended. “Don’t compare me to a dog. I’m more like a… A…”
“A…?” you press, a pretty smile flickering at your lips.
“A panther,” he supplies confidently.
“A kitten,” you correct.
Dazai groans dramatically, flinging his head back, but he finds himself smiling. He finds his chest full of warmth, light and bubbly, and when he looks back up at you to meet your eyes, he finds the same emotion swimming on your face. He thinks again that no one has ever looked at him like this before—not with such fondness, not with adoration, not with…
No, Dazai doesn’t dare think that word.
“I care about you too,” he admits. He’s hesitant, like he’s scared to say the words out loud.
“Even with all of the skeletons hidden in my closet?” you tease, leaning down to brush your lips against his again, and then a second time, and then a third. He basks in it, eyes sliding shut as you kiss him gently—it takes a few moments for your words to register.
“They’re not worse than mine,” he replies, the pads of his fingers running up and down your thighs absently. After a couple of seconds pass, he asks, “… What skeletons do you have?”
You tilt your head to the side and say playfully, “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”
Dazai isn’t ready for that, so he just tosses you a smile and a wink before murmuring, “How about you show me something else instead?”
You laugh at that, tossing your head back and giggling so genuinely that your hand flies to your mouth to muffle the sound. His lips part to make another suggestive comment, but he finds himself breathless at the sight of you. 
You’re beautiful, and Dazai can’t help but think again that he doesn’t deserve this. You.
“Deal,” you agree.
This time when you lean down to press your lips against his, Dazai’s hands are content to rest on your thighs. His fingers don’t itch to wrangle control from you, and his mind isn’t plagued with paranoia-induced thoughts.
He thinks, maybe, that he can get used to this. Used to you.
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pshbites · 3 days ago
Text
SUPER RICH KIDS ━ psh
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pairing : richboy!sunghoon x fem!reader genre : sort of strangers to lovers, mix of angst and fluff but mostly fluff, sort of in an unspoken but aware relationship at the end warnings : mentions of fake friends, drug usage, and backstabbing, not proofread, excessive use of commas lol.. i think that’s it synopsis : the last person you expected to have a connection with was park sunghoon but you were proven wrong wc : 1.1k a/n : first fic of the new year LESSGOO. yes this is heavy inspo off of super rich kids by frank ocean AND this is dedicated to my lizzie bear larb u
if u enjoyed pls like & reblog, feedback is also always appreciated!!
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“eating alone are you?” sunghoon spoke, making you look up from your lunchbox. he entered the dark corridor where you sat and looked down at you. “if you’re here to make fun of me then go away” you sighed out, taking a bite of the rice ball you made this morning. “i could, but that’s no fun is it?” he said, sitting down on the other side of the narrow hallway, stretching his legs out so they were right next to you. he crossed his arms and looked down in his lap. 
“surprised you’re sitting down, i figured a rich kid like you wouldn’t want to get his fancy clothes dirty” you scoffed making sunghoon roll his eyes at you. “oh shut it, i couldn’t care less about clothes right now, don’t you have any friends to eat lunch with?” you let out a small laugh, shaking your head. “i could ask you the very same thing” you mumbled back, taking another bite of your rice ball. 
in your four years of attending this academy never has park sunghoon ever willingly talked to you. he acknowledged your existence which was better than what he did to most, but that never meant you were off limits to the constant teasing and remarks from his friend group. that was the norm for you, a non wealthy kid, to be going to a school surrounded by rich kids. always on the outside looking in. 
“isn’t it pathetic, i mean to not have any friends” sunghoon looked at you, tilting his head. you couldn’t tell if he meant that in a sincere way or a taunting way, either way your answer would’ve been the same. “i’d rather not have any friends than have ones who betray me” you said, mouth suddenly feeling bitter that the thought of your ‘friend’ who backstabbed you in the worst way possible. “i agree” sunghoon mumbled, now looking down at the floor. you furrowed your brows, “weren’t you just with them earlier?” making him roll his eyes once more. 
he shook his head, sitting up a little straighter. “you wouldn’t get it” you raised your eyebrow and sat up straighter as well, setting your lunchbox down, crossing your arms and staring back at him. “try me.” he sighed out and threw his head back, “i found out everyone in my life hates me, and my best friend slept with my ex-girlfriend.” you furrowed your brows, still looking at him. he adjusted his head straighter, looking back at you. “i feel like everything is so fake now, that this idea i had of them is just gone.” you nodded, pursing your lips in thought. you hesitated before speaking up. 
“i mean, did you really think they were your real friends?” 
“what.” 
you shrugged and threw your hands up, “your name holds value sunghoon, i’m sure you know that and i’m more than sure they did too.” sunghoon clenched his jaw and rolled his eyes again, clearly annoyed about what you were insinuating. deep down though he knew you were right, it was true. “guess no amount of wealth can get me a friend” he laughed dryly making you frown slightly. just before you could speak up, the bell for lunch rang out. you silently got together your things and stood up, sunghoon did as well. just before sunghoon left, you stopped him. “same time tomorrow?” you said, making him look back at stare at you before he walked off without a word. 
you didn’t expect much but sunghoon was there the next day and the day after and the day after. soon enough you had been eating lunch in that same hallway for one whole month. in that time you had gotten to know sunghoon more, causing the both of you to open up and confide in one another. you learned more about sunghoons fake friends and he learned about your friend, it was weird how one common thread could bring you two so close. 
“all they do is get high off their face, i don’t think im missing out much” sunghoon said, speaking of his friend groups infamous parties making you laugh. “and drinking ancient liquor” you added making sunghoon laugh along with you. the two of you sat next to one another, sharing whatever lunch you had packed for yourself that day. you quickly realized that sunghoon hadn’t ever had home cooked lunches, it was always dinner at a fancy restaurant or some world renowned private chef making luxury meals. it was odd, despite your differences you hadn’t expected sunghoon to grow so close to you. 
it fell silent between the two of you as you silently ate your food. sunghoon finally broke the silence with an interesting statement. “im finally gonna confront them, about it all” he turned to you, you giving him a shocked expression. “really?” he nodded, taking a sip of the water bottle you brought for him. “i have evidence and proof of everything so im gonna confront them tonight and i think it’ll all end.. my friendship between them” the two of you held eye contact in silence over sunghoons words, a part of you was proud of him the other part felt sorry for him. 
he looked ahead at the wall across from you two, setting down the sandwich you made. “it’s weird how i went from having it all to nothing. like no one even cares anymore” he sighed out, making you frown softly. you hesitated before reaching for his hand and intertwining your fingers. “you have me, i care for you” you breathed out, making sunghoon look in your eyes. you both felt that. 
that weird feeling where everything clicks, where you feel.. okay after not feeling okay for months. that feeling where nothing else matters except the person sitting right beside you. that feeling when you tell this person more things that you don’t even tell your family. that feeling of pure infatuation and almost love. maybe you loved sunghoon or maybe you just strongly liked him. whatever it was it was real and you both could feel it but you could feel it even more in this moment. 
“i care for you too,” he said, still lost in your eyes. maybe that was your way of saying you liked each other but it didn’t matter because the message was across, he didn’t jerk his hand away from yours when you reached for it but instead he scooched closer to you, letting you rest your head on his shoulder as the two of you stared at the wall across from you. 
teenage love wasn’t something you desired but maybe, unknowingly, you found it when you least expected it. 
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taglist : @cupidhoons @leeechin @chobunz @wensurr @ja4hyvn @kozumesphone @17ericas @suneng @hyunnies-world @kiss4noo @jellyluv4eva @heelariously @laylasbunbunny @silquids @squiishymeow @heeambi @yourmomssneakylink @rriribelle @srehyaps @bubblytaetae @t1iqaa @en-heedeungie @wintertxt @sweettaitea @beatrizmel-472 @i03jae @jakef3ver @mamuljji @coqhee @luvyou2ooo @thedemonriot @justalittle-hee @jjongsaengzz @beigerin @mariahxrrera @cherrybeomm @vveebee @mitmit01 @blockbusterhee @yeehawnana @mochamvgz @livelaughluvryanreynolds @ami-soph @sunghoonsperfume (bold cannot be tagged)
enha taglist
© all rights to pshbites 2024. please do not copy, translate or repost my works
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wendichester · 2 days ago
Note
Cute Dean request with a bit of smug Dean
Based on the truth episode loosely, the whole time on the mission Dean’s been trying to get you to admit you’d “hit that” with him in his cocky smug flirtation, so when Dean realises he’s cursed with people telling him the truth, he decides to prove to you both that you want to sleep with him except he gets more than he bargains for when you actually admit feelings and your view on him (the whole “you think so little of yourself but you’re a good guy” spiel) that hits him to his core
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚ loose lips,
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summary. being cursed isn't always bad, right?
pairing. dean winchester x reader
wordcount. 687.
notes. i just love writing dean throw off guard. suits the hell out of him 😮‍💨
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Dean has been insufferable the entire case.
“You’d totally hit this,” he says, leaning against the Impala with that cocky smirk that you both love and loathe.
You roll your eyes for what feels like the hundredth time. “In your dreams, Winchester.”
“Oh, come on,” he teases, striding closer. “You’re not fooling anyone, sweetheart. Just admit it. You think I’m irresistible.”
“Dean, you’re irresistible to waitresses, maybe,” you shoot back, grinning when his smirk falters for half a second.
He’s been relentless since the case started—a strange series of deaths linked to a cursed item that forces people to tell the truth. Dean, being Dean, has been using the situation to dig at everyone’s secrets. But then, you got hit with the curse, and everything that falls from your pretty lips is nothing more, nothing less than the brutal truth.
Back at the motel, the conversation spirals once again. Dean perches himself on the edge of the table, legs spread in that way that commands attention.
“So,” he says, voice dropping into a teasing lilt, “guess now’s your chance to prove yourself.”
You sigh, shooting him a sharp look. “Prove myself about what, exactly?”
“You’re cursed,” he points out, blatantly smug. As you glare at him, he takes it as his cue to continue. “That you’re not dying to jump me,” he says, his grin widening. “Because I’ve got to tell you, sweetheart, all signs point to yes.”
This conversation is about to get a whole lot more dangerous. “Fine, Dean. You want the truth?”
“Let’s test it,” he says, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Do you think I’m hot?”
You hesitate, your face heating.
“Yes,” you blurt, immediately slapping a hand over your mouth.
Dean’s grin stretches even wider. “Knew it!”
You groan, turning away from him. “This is so unfair.”
“Unfair?” he teases, stepping closer. “Come on, sweetheart, just admit it. You’ve thought about it. Us. Together.”
You clench your jaw, trying to resist, but the words spill out anyway. “Yes, okay? I’ve thought about it.” You cross the room, arms crossed, standing close enough to wipe the smug look off his face. “But not for the reasons you think.”
That gets his attention. The playful glint in his eyes dims, and his smirk falters. “What do you mean?”
“You think it’s just about your stupid good looks or your dumb one-liners?” You take a steadying breath. “Dean, you’re one of the best men I’ve ever known. You’d die for the people you care about. You’re brave, loyal, and selfless, even when you don’t think you’re worth a damn. You think I haven’t noticed?”
Dean blinks, his jaw tightening as he processes your words. The room feels heavy with the weight of your confession.
“And the worst part,” you continue, “is you don’t see it. You don’t even believe you deserve to be loved.”
For a moment, Dean looks completely unguarded, the mask he wears every day slipping just enough for you to see the vulnerability beneath. “You really see me like that?” he asks, his voice quiet, almost unsure.
“I do,” you say simply, the truth settling between you like some sort of fragile truce.
He lets out a soft, humorless chuckle, running a hand over his face. “Well, I wasn’t expecting that.”
“Yeah, well,” you say, offering a small smile, “maybe you should stop fishing for answers if you’re not ready to hear them.”
Dean stands up, stepping closer, his green eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that makes your breath hitch. “Maybe I needed to hear it,” he murmurs.
You don’t move as he reaches up, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. His touch is surprisingly soft, and when he speaks again, his voice is steady. “You deserve the truth too, you know. You mean more to me than I’ve ever let on.”
Your chest tightens as the honesty in his words hits you. It isn’t cocky, isn’t flirtatious—it’s just Dean, stripped of his usual bravado.
The curse might force the truth out of you, but for once, it doesn’t feel like a burden—it feels like freedom.
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want be part of the taglist.ᐣ ⋆.˚ ★— @iloveeveryoneyoureamazing ⋆ @deans-daydream ⋆ @ariasong11 ⋆ @ambiguous-avery ⋆ @krabog ⋆ @itsdearapril ⋆ @nymphet-quenn
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jeonginsleftcheek · 16 hours ago
Text
Safe embrace
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pairing: lee felix x afab!reader
genre: fluff, smut, best friends to lovers
wc: 16k
synopsis: your toxic boyfriend leaves you just as you find out you're carrying his child, making your worst nightmare come true. thinking you have no one and you'll have to care for the baby alone, you're pleasantly surprised when your best friend swoops in to help you out.
warnings: toxic relationship, mentions of abuse and cheating, mentions of abortion (all in the beginning), pregnancy symptoms, crying, brief description of birth (nothing graphic)
nsfw warnings: multiple sex scenes, pregnant sex, nipple play, breeding kink, breastfeeding kink, oral (f and m), fingering, unprotected sex, creampies, felix is soft and obsessed
a/n: this was kind of inspired by this drabble i wrote! hope you enjoy the full fic💙 i never wrote pregnant reader and i wanted to write something mostly sweet🫶🏻
~ divider by @strangergraphics
~ masterlist
You were standing in front of your bathroom mirror shaking, the two little lines indicating that you were pregnant.
Your eyes welled up with tears, your worst fear had come true.
You were so close to getting out of your toxic relationship and now you were bound forever to the person who abused you and treated you like crap.
Anxiety took over your body as you started sobbing, he was going to come home from work soon and you had no idea how he'd react to the news.
Around 8pm he walked in, late as usual, you knew he was cheating on you but any time you tried to start a conversation with him, he'd find a way to spin it and make it seem like everything was your fault.
In the back of your mind, you knew it wasn't but three years of verbal abuse can do a lot to a person's way of thinking, and you were used to being figuratively smacked around by your boyfriend, always making excuses for him in your mind; he's exhausted from work, he didn't mean it, someone irritated him, he'll be better next time.
He never got physical, but sometimes you thought it was just a matter of time before he starts slapping you around.
It's not like you never tried to leave, you did.
But, he always found a way to manipulate you into coming back to him and like a fool you always fell for his empty promises.
This time, you decided it was the last time and you finally gathered all of the courage you had.
You were going to leave his sorry ass and never come back again, never fall for his lies again, never feel this miserable but now you felt you had no way out of this.
"What did you make for dinner?" he asked, not even sparing you a glance as he took his tie off.
"Chicken and rice." you answered.
"Good." he said as he continued to strip and you stood there nervously, playing with your fingers.
He lifted his head up and frowned at you.
"What are you waiting for? Serve me dinner, I'm hungry." he looked at you as if you were just a maid in his house and even though you wanted to tell him to put his own damn food on his plate, your tongue was twisted like always and your legs had a mind of their own.
You did what he asked, serving him dinner, before you sat on the other side.
He sat down and started eating. Your heart was beating fast as you kept looking at him.
"There's something I have to tell you." you decided to break the ice.
"What?" he asked, an unimpressed look on his face.
"I- I'm pregnant." you said quietly and he froze before his fork fell out of his hand, clattering against the plate.
Suddenly, he started laughing.
"You're shitting me, right?"
"No, I took a few tests and they're all positive."
He continued laughing and it was not the reaction you expected.
"Whatever. Get rid of it." he said, picking his fork back up and continuing to eat.
"What?" you looked at him in shock, your heart skipping a beat.
"You heard me. I'll pay for the abortion. I don't want to have a child with you." he said like you were the most disgusting thing he's ever seen.
"I'm- I don't want to get an abortion." you swallowed and he looked up at you.
"Well, I don't give a fuck about what you want. You will do as I say."
"No, I won't!" you stood up suddenly and he looked up at you before letting out a chuckle.
"Great, I was looking for a reason to do this." he said before standing up.
"D-do what?" you stuttered, taking a step back as fear washed over you.
"Get the hell out of my house." he crossed his arms and your lips parted.
"You're throwing me out?" your eyes widened.
"Yes, if you don't get rid of that thing, I want you out."
"But I have nowhere to go." your eyes filled up with tears, you had nothing of your own, your asshole boyfriend made sure he was the one to provide you with everything so you had to depend on him.
"Do I look like I care? You're good for nothing anyways. Can't even cook a decent meal and now you wanna have a baby? Ridiculous. The only thing you're good for is spending my money."
His words stung and everything around you started spinning, your head hurt and you had trouble breathing as you started panicking.
"You didn't let me work!" your voice raised as your eyes filled with tears.
He scoffed, coming closer to you as he grabbed your wrist and you yelled for him to let you go but he started dragging you towards the front door.
"I said get out bitch! I don't want anything to do with you and whatever is inside you. If you ever come near me again I'll fucking kill you!" he yelled as he opened the door, literally throwing you out before slamming the door in your face.
You couldn't believe he reacted this way, you thought he'd use your pregnancy to manipulate you even more but he did the opposite.
You really had nothing except your phone in your pocket, not even a jacket as you shivered in the cold night air. Tears kept sliding down your cheeks as you turned and started walking down the street. Your mind was blank for some time while you were trying to process everything that happened.
You reached for your phone and saw you had texts from Felix, your best friend. A smile spread on your face instantly, he was the only good thing in your life, the only light that shined on you in your darkest moments. You decided to call him and he picked up almost immediately.
"Oh, hey bubby! I was just about to text you." he answered cheerfully, as always.
"Lix." you sniffled. "Are you home?" you almost didn't recognize your voice, you sounded broken.
"Y/n, what's wrong?" Felix was worried instantly.
"Can you pick me up? Please?" you couldn't stop crying.
"Of course, tell me where you are and I will be there as soon as I can." he said, already getting up and grabbing his jacket.
You told him where you were and waited as you picked on your jeans.
Felix drove fast, finding you in less than ten minutes. His heart broke when he saw you hugging yourself and shivering without a jacket.
He ran out of his car fast and you looked up at him, fresh tears forming in your eyes. Felix took his jacket off without a word, wrapping you up in it before enveloping you in a hug.
"Shh, it's okay bubby. I'm here now." he soothed you with his warm deep voice, his hand moving in circles on your upper back.
"Let's get you warmed up, hm?" he leaned back to look at you and you nodded.
Felix turned up the heating in the car for you and the ride was silent as he drove you back to his apartment. Your mind started spinning as you stared out the window, all the possible scenarios passed you by and none of them seemed positive.
Felix led you to the couch, wrapping you up in a blanket and running to the kitchen to make you a cup of hot cocoa as you melted into the warm and soft fabric that was hugging you.
It smelled like Felix and it was comforting just like he always was.
"Careful, it's still hot." he smiled as he brought two cups of steaming hot cocoa, before sitting down next to you carefully.
"Was it him?" Felix asked with a serious expression on his face, referring to your, well now ex-boyfriend.
Felix never liked the guy, he could see right through his fake smiles and fake words. You never told him the extent of the abuse but he knew something was wrong.
"He threw me out of his house." you said, clutching onto the blanket and Felix's eyes widened.
"What? What the hell is wrong with him?!" Felix looked angry at that moment, his face becoming red and his hands clenching into fists.
"Because I'm pregnant." you finished, suddenly finding the white rug under the coffee table in Felix's living room interesting.
It was quiet for a while before you felt his hand on yours so you looked up at him and he wore the softest expression you've ever seen on your best friend's face.
"I'm so sorry, y/n."
"Well, it's not your fault. It's mine. I was dumb and let him control me, I should've left him sooner and now he dumped me and said he doesn't want me or the baby. Actually, he threatened me, telling me if I don't abort he will throw me out. And I told him that I'm keeping the baby..."
"First of all, you're not dumb, he is. I knew he was an asshole but I had no idea he was this sick. I can't believe he told you to abort, that's your decision to make anyways." Felix said and you sat quietly as he squeezed your hand.
Your eyes welled up with tears again.
"What am I gonna do now? I have nowhere to go."
Felix scooted closer to you.
"Wrong." he said with a smile and you looked at him. "You can stay here, with me."
"B-but I don't wanna impose on your privacy. And with a baby too..." you felt like a burden at that moment, like you were asking too much of Felix even though he was the one to offer it first.
"Nonsense. You're my best friend, you think I would leave you out on the street? You and your baby are more than welcome here. I will help you with everything you need and you can focus on growing a life." he smiled at you and you burst into tears.
"Y-you're an angel, Lixie." you sobbed as you wrapped your arms around his waist, burying your face in his chest. "Are you sure this is okay?"
"More than sure, bubs. You know I love you a lot?" he said, his eyes full of warmness as he smiled at you sweetly, caressing your head.
"I love you too, Lixie." you held him tightly.
"Now, drink your cocoa before it gets cold." he chuckled, handing you the cup.
You felt so blessed to have someone like him as a best friend and the horrible feelings that filled you up earlier were now in the back of your mind.
"You must be exhausted." Felix noticed as you kept sinking into the couch while you drank the cocoa and he yapped about his favorite games to get your mind off of everything.
"Actually, I am." you nodded.
"Are you hungry? I'll make dinner and you can take a nice hot shower." Felix smiled.
"I don't even have any clothes." your eyes welled up with tears again.
"You can wear mine. Don't worry about anything." he quickly shook his head and you nodded as he reached to touch your face, wiping your tears away with his thumb.
When you stepped into the shower, you were left with your thoughts again.
You thought about your life, your now ex boyfriend and how you let yourself get into this situation where you couldn't even help yourself and had to depend on someone else helping you.
And now you had a life growing inside you, your ex's words ringing in your head; how you're not capable of doing anything properly, not even cleaning or cooking let alone anything else, how are you going to take care of another human being?
You couldn't stop crying but you didn't want to worry Felix and stay in the shower for too long so you tried to dry your tears and look normal as you got dressed in the clothes he gave you.
Felix turned to look at you as you walked in and his heart hurt when he saw the redness in your eyes and your sad face, you've never looked this down before.
"I made some ramen. That was the fastest thing I could whip up but tomorrow we can go shopping for some groceries because you need to eat healthy from now on. Oh and you're gonna need to make a doctor's appointment. Don't worry, I'll go with you." he talked as he served dinner and you sat with your hands in your lap, crying quietly as your tears soaked the fabric of the shirt you were wearing.
"Y/n?" he leaned down to look at your face.
"I'm sorry, Felix. I just feel so bad." you sniffled.
"Hey, it's okay, really. I told you I don't mind taking care of you, in fact it makes me happy."
"It's not just that." you hiccuped as he sat next to you, grabbing your hands and rubbing circles with his thumbs.
"What is it?" he tilted his head at you.
"I don't think I will be any good at this." your voice was quiet, barely above a whisper.
"What? Being a mom?" Felix frowned and you nodded.
"You're gonna be an amazing mom, y/n. I've known you almost my whole life and you're the most caring and responsible person I know. Look, I know everything seems terrifying right now, you just found out you're pregnant and your ex acted like an asshole so you're pretty shaken up. What you need is food and sleep. And to stop thinking about things that haven't even happened yet, hm?" Felix played with your fingers and you nodded, wiping your tears away.
"You're right, I can't even think straight right now. There is so many emotions inside me that I don't know where to start."
"Let's start with dinner." Felix smiled and you were amazed at how calm he seemed.
But on the inside, Felix was seething. He couldn't believe that your ex really had no heart, throwing you away like he did, especially when you're pregnant.
Felix was mad at himself in a way, he felt like he could've done something more to help you get out of the toxic relationship earlier and you wouldn't be as hurt as you are now.
He wished you chose him instead of your ex. Things would've been different then, Felix would treat you like a queen, the way you deserve it.
To you, Felix looked absolutely calm as he smiled at you but rage was bubbling up inside him along with the need to smash in your ex's face. But he held all that down for your sake, his top priority was to make you feel safe, not upset.
"I would give you the guest room to sleep in but it kind of became a storage room. So I'll have to get everything out and clean it up but in the meantime you can sleep in my room and I'll take the couch." Felix said after you got ready for bed.
"Oh, I can sleep on the couch, I don't wanna take your room too." you said, your face burning.
"No way, the couch is not comfortable." he shook his head.
"But isn't that gonna be bad for your back?" you worried instantly, knowing that your friend had back problems.
"I'll be okay for one night." he smiled.
"If you're sure." you chewed on your lip nervously.
"Of course."
Felix changed the sheets and prepared the couch as you barely stood on your feet, the exhaustion from the turmoil you felt washing over your body.
"Everything's gonna be okay, bubby." Felix said soothingly as he gave you a warm hug.
You didn't know what to say to thank him for everything he's doing, instead you just squeezed him tightly making him squeal and chuckle.
"Good night, y/n."
"Good night, Lixie."
As soon as your head hit the pillow, you fell asleep, drowning in the soft sheets and blankets.
Felix tossed and turned on his couch, mind racing with thoughts.
He thought about how much you meant to him, how much he had always loved you and wanted to be with you, but it was like you were blind to his love and instead kept running to your asshole ex.
He thought about how scared you must be, a protective feeling waking up inside him along with all the other feelings he had for you that he needed to learn how to suppress because you had a boyfriend.
Felix decided he was going to do his best to show you that love is supposed to be soft, comforting and sweet, not whatever your asshole ex made you believe.
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The next morning when you woke up, you were confused for a second until you rubbed your eyes and looked around.
Seeing you were in Felix's room, everything that happened last night came flooding back, some kind of fear washing over you but the fact that you were surrounded by Felix's comforting scent and his things managed to calm you down.
He always had this effect on you, that's why you kept one of his hoodies for years even though it didn't even smell like him anymore; it belonged to him and that was enough to comfort you.
Shit! Your things!, you remembered, your ex threw you out without giving you any of your clothes, your knick-knacks and most importantly your laptop.
You slowly got up, following the sounds of utensils that were coming from the kitchen.
As soon as you entered, you saw a very disheveled Felix running around the stove like a busy-bee.
The smell of eggs hit you and your stomach started rising up to your throat.
"Oh, good morning y/n." Felix turned to look at you just as you covered your mouth with your hand. His eyes widened as you turned around, running to the bathroom.
"Shit." Felix cursed under his breath, turning the stove off and running after you just in time as you leaned over the toilet.
He quickly gathered your hair in his hand as you threw up, his other hand moving in soothing circles on your upper back.
"Ew." you whimpered as your eyes teared up.
"Are you okay?" Felix asked cautiously when you flushed the toilet.
"The smell of eggs was too much. I didn't think this would start already." you groaned and Felix chuckled.
"Damn, my cooking sucks that bad, huh?" he joked, trying to lighten the mood and you giggled.
"We can work on that." you winked as he smiled at you.
"You know what? I will look up what's good for you to eat right now with the sickness and all, and I'll make it for you." he said.
"That's sweet, Lixie but I can make it myself, don't worry about it." you quickly shook your head.
Felix pouted at you before grabbing your face. Your heart skipped a beat.
"Listen to me. I enjoy taking care of you so let me do this for you."
"Fine." you sighed as you made your way back to the kitchen.
"Remember that time in high school when you got shitfaced?" Felix smirked at you, throwing the half-burnt eggs in the trash.
"Oh my god, please don't talk about that." embarrassment washed over you.
"Come on, we can laugh at it now. You were so funny, you couldn't even talk properly. And you tried to climb on the table and dance. I think if I didn't catch you, you'd probably break a bone or something." Felix snickered as he searched up some breakfast ideas on his phone.
"Ha ha, very funny that I almost got a concussion by being a lightweight." you rolled your eyes with a smile.
"Nah, I would've caught you before you hit the floor anyways." Felix smiled, making your stomach flutter.
"Hey, I have some of these things in my kitchen. Oats and almonds and such." he showed you a recipe he found and you nodded.
"I can make that too, it's no biggie." you started getting up but Felix shook his head.
"I know you can. But I want to do it for you."
You couldn't argue with him and he seemed genuinely happy about making you breakfast so you sat down and waited, playing with your fingers.
"You know, I remembered that I never had the chance to get all my stuff from my ex. My laptop is still at his place." you chewed on your lip.
"I'll get them." Felix said nonchalantly as the two of you ate.
"A-are you sure? He can be... an uncomfortable person." you grimaced and Felix chuckled.
"Bubby, I have a 3rd degree black belt in taekwondo. I could break him in half if I wanted to." he smirked, making you giggle.
"You're right, I forgot with how innocent you look." you teased and Felix laughed.
"All the better. He won't know what hit him." he sat up straight then made a few moves with his arms acting like he was cutting the air into pieces.
"Okay, just don't get in trouble, killer."
-
When Felix left to get your things, you decided to clean up the kitchen. You didn't want to feel like you were just waiting for him to do everything for you, you wanted to do your part and help him out when he took you in without even thinking twice.
Felix must be an angel, that's what you thought as you smiled to yourself while washing the dishes.
Your angel was currently parked in front of your ex's house, his hands gripping the steering wheel, knuckles turning white from the way he held onto it.
He was trying to calm his anger down, the one that surfaced as he thought about your disgusting boyfriend yelling at you and throwing you out into the cold night.
Felix had to walk in there with a cool demeanor, otherwise he would end up letting his anger get the best of him and he'd show the guy just who he had crossed.
After taking a few deep breaths, Felix finally made his way to the door and knocked. Shuffling could be heard from the other side before your ex opened the door, giving Felix the elevator eyes.
"Oh, you." the guy scrunched his nose up.
"I'm here to pick up y/n's things." Felix said calmly.
"Whatever, just do it quickly. It's junk anyways, you saved me the time I would lose throwing it out." he shrugged and Felix could feel the anger course through his veins but he had to bite his tongue.
He tried to gather all your stuff as quickly as he could, putting it in a bag he brought, making sure to take your laptop too. A small smile danced on his lips when he saw you still had his favorite hoodie. He grabbed it and put it in the bag too before turning around to leave the room.
"I'm assuming y/n ran to you immediately." your ex scoffed. "Makes sense, she's not capable of taking care of herself anyways."
Felix's eyes darkened.
"You better watch what you say." his voice dipped low.
"Or what?" your ex folded his arms on his chest, staring at Felix.
"Or you'll regret it."
"Ooh, I'm so scared!" he mocked as Felix made his way out of the house.
"Don't even think of coming near y/n again or trying to contact her. Matter of fact, I don't wanna hear you say her name ever again." Felix said and turned on his heel, not giving your ex time to respond as he frowned on the porch.
-
"I had no idea you kept my hoodie." Felix smiled as you rummaged through your things and your face heated up.
"Oh... Of course I did. It was a gift." you smiled back.
"Yeah, I remember that day like it was yesterday. We were at Jeongin's birthday party."
2 years ago
You had been invited to yours and Felix's mutual friend's party for his birthday. Getting your boyfriend to go with you was another story.
"Why do I have to go? I don't even know Jeongin well. And why would you want to go there alone? We should stay at home." he said.
"But Jeongin is my friend! He invited me and I already bought a gift."
"So what? You can just give it to him some other day. I was hoping we could stay in tonight." he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into him.
"B-but I really want to go." you said.
"Fine. Go. But there will be consequences."
"What?" your eyebrow lifted in shock. "What are you talking about?"
"If you want to find out, just go to the party." he smirked at you.
"I- Just... just come with me? Please?"
He looked at you, pursing his lips as he thought about it. There would be so many guys there, is what ran through his mind. He didn't think you were that pretty but a horny drunk guy would fuck anything that walks so he decided it would be best if he went just so he could keep an eye on you.
"Fine."
Unaware of his thougths, you squealed happily, giving him a hug.
But everything went wrong at the party. Your boyfriend thought you had lingered too much while hugging Jeongin, making his delusional mind come up with all sorts of scenarios of you cheating on him.
He got drunk and made a scene, calling you a cheap slut before he left the party, leaving you behind. You cried as you ran to the back porch, wanting to catch some fresh night air in hopes of calming down.
"Hey, you okay?" it was Felix, who followed after you.
"Not really." you sighed, wiping your tears away as you shivered.
He noticed you were cold so he took off his hoodie.
"Here, you can have it." he smiled sweetly at you, making you melt instantly as you thanked him.
"You know you can do so much better than him, right?" Felix asked as you drowned in the warmth his hoodie provided.
"We all have our flaws, Lix. He's not that bad. He'll realize he was wrong and apologize to me once he's sober." you shrugged.
"Are you sure? Because if he-"
"Lix, it's fine really. You don't have to worry."
Of course it wasn't fine, the whole relationship kept spiralling downwards after that, bringing you to your current situation.
"Y/n?" Felix brought you out of your thoughts as you clutched onto his hoodie.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I got distracted." you smiled and he smiled back at you. "Lixie, thanks for being there for me always. I know I kind of ignored you lately but my ex didn't like me talking to other guys."
"What an insecure pig." Felix said and you chuckled. "But of course, I told you I'd always be there for you. Now, I'm gonna clean out the guest room and then we can call to make a doctor's appointment, does that sound good?"
"Yeah, sounds perfect. Do you need me to help?"
"No, it's all heavy stuff i have to move." Felix shook his head so you offered to make lunch.
While you were making it, you remembered what your ex said.
'Can't even cook a decent meal and now you wanna have a baby? Ridiculous.'
Your eyes watered instantly and you quickly wiped off the falling tears, continuing to cut veggies. You heard Felix moving around stuff and grunting as you cooked, humming to yourself.
"All done." he came into the kitchen with his hair messy and a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead.
Something stirred in your gut for a moment but you ignored it.
"I'm almost done too. The smell of the meat is bothering me a little." you said and Felix gasped.
"Oh, let me finish up then." he quickly made his way to you.
"Maybe you should shower first." you took a step back from him and he pouted.
"Are you calling me stinky?"
"Mhm." you grimaced and he laughed.
"Fine, I get it. Be back in 5 minutes." he practically ran out of the kitchen and you let out a breath you were holding.
It wasn't that the scent of him made your stomach rise, quite the opposite, he suddenly smelled even nicer to you than before and once he came closer you felt it in your core. You scolded yourself for thinking about Felix like that and tried to ignore it as you finished up lunch.
When Felix came back, his hair still damp from the shower you looked at him in anticipation as he sat down to eat. Anxiety washed over you as you expected to be chastised for being a lousy cook even though you know in your heart Felix would never say something like that.
"Mm, this is delicious. I must say, I don't eat very healthily since I work a lot and this is refreshing." he smiled at you and relief took over.
"Thank you, I'm glad you like it." you smiled back at him.
After lunch, you called to make a doctor's appointment and Felix had some work to do on his computer, luckily he was mostly working from home as a programmer, only going to the office twice a week or more if needed for a project.
"I hope the bed is comfy enough." Felix said as you were getting ready to sleep in the guest room, which was now your room.
"Lixie, please, I'm grateful to have a bed at all." you sighed and he grabbed your hand.
"We'll get through this." he whispered and you nodded.
"I know."
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A few days later, Felix and you walked out of the hospital with news that you were 6 weeks pregnant and that thankfully the baby was doing well.
"See, you had nothing to worry about." Felix smiled at you as the two of you got in his car.
But your emotions got the better of you immediately as you started crying.
"Oh, y/n?! What's wrong?" he leaned towards you, worry evident in his voice.
"I don't know, I- I think I'm crying from relief." you sniffled and Felix smiled at you fondly. "Let's just go home." you added, not even realizing that you called his apartment 'home'.
But Felix did, and his stomach filled up with butterflies that wouldn't stop flying around his insides until he parked in front of the building.
"I'm not feeling the best." you clutched at your stomach as you walked in, the feeling of nausea taking over your body. It was exhausting but you kept trying to remind yourself that this was just a phase, the worst part of it and that it will get better with time.
Some days it worked, other days it was unbearable. Today seemed to be one of those other days as your emotions were all over the place.
"Okay, go lay down and I will make some lunch."
Felix took it all so seriously, stepping up immediately as if it was his baby which made your heart clench in your chest. He made sure you were comfortable, brought you some tea and crackers for nausea, even pressed his lips on your forehead as he tucked you in.
When he left the room, tears started sliding down your cheeks and soaking your pillow.
You felt like you didn't do anything to deserve someone like Felix taking you in, and the burden of a baby that had nothing to do with him and you had no idea why he would go to such lengths to make you feel good. Yes, of course you knew that he cared about you but you felt beyond grateful and humble, trying to think of a way to give back.
But, Felix saw this as a second chance with you. A chance he would not let go to waste like he did before, when he held his tongue and his feelings back, never even hinting to you how much he loves you. It was enough for him that you were there and that everything was fine with you and the baby, the rest was not as important.
"I can't believe you're actually pregnant." Felix chuckled as the two of you chilled on the couch after dinner, some romantic comedy playing on tv.
"I can't believe it either." you chuckled with him. "I think it'll be more believeable when I start looking the part." you added and Felix froze for a moment.
How could he forget?
He'd already noticed your breasts getting bigger and he felt bad for the way he kept stealing glances at them all the time, but at the end of the day he's just a man.
It wasn't his fault that they looked rounder, and that you didn't care to wear a bra next to him, your nipples poking under the material of your shirt constantly, the way they swayed or jiggled with any movement you made.
Felix felt his dick twitch and he started beating himself up immediately. It's barely been two weeks since you were at his place, and he knew you were vulnerable and the last thing he would want to do was to make you feel like he was pouncing on you instantly.
God, he got so used to keeping his feelings and urges about you to himself, why was that so hard all of a sudden?
"Excuse me." Felix stood up rather quickly and you looked up at him shortly, watching him scramble to get to the bathroom.
You shrugged, continuing to watch the movie as you snuggled closer to the spot he was lounging in, the couch still warm and smelling like the body wash he used earlier. For some reason, you wanted to roll in it but you settled on stealing his spot and taking deep breaths.
Felix was trying to exercise deep breathing too, as he stood in the bathroom, willing his cock to soften up. Just the thought of you being all round and cute had him so worked up. How is he supposed to survive this?
Somehow, he managed to calm down and when he came back to the living room, his heart fluttered when he saw you dozing off in his spot.
"Bubby? You wanna sleep?" he said quietly, putting a strand of your hair behind your ear gently.
"Mm." you mumbled, half asleep.
"Cutie." Felix chuckled fondly before he gently lifted you up and carried you to your room.
"Lixie." you reached out for him blindly as he laid you down.
"It's okay, I'm here. Get some rest." he caressed your head before going back to the living room.
Your dreams were filled with images of your best friend that night, fleeting pictures of a relationship that never happened appeared in your mind, ending with the two of you holding a baby in your arms.
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Couple of weeks later, you and Felix fell into a nice rhythm. He was mostly home, only having to go to the office twice a week, sometimes four days if he was working on a bigger project. You were glad he was there because your nausea has gotten worse and Felix didn't mind helping you out as always, cooking and cleaning together with the work he was doing.
You felt bad for that again, crying to him how you feel like you're not doing anything in the house and Felix was quick to shut all those thoughts down.
"Y/n, you are growing a literal human being. That's exhausting, your body is changing rapidly and you're scared. And that's normal and it's okay." Felix held you in his arms.
"How are you so understanding?" you hiccuped as you gripped his shirt, soaking it with your tears.
Because I love you.
Because I wanna make you happy.
Because you deserve this and more.
"I've been reading some books." Felix smirked playfully instead of saying all the other thoughts that crossed his mind at first.
You looked up at him before bursting into laughter, smacking his chest as he giggled at you.
It was getting harder for him every day, living with you and being together 24/7 felt so domestic, especially with you being pregnant and Felix kept daydreaming that the baby inside you was his baby too.
It didn't help that your tits just kept getting bigger and that you finally had a little bump to indicate the precious life growing inside you and Felix was obsessed with the way it looked on you.
You were slowly coming to terms with it, everything felt so surreal because it was happening so fast and you knew that even though it seems hard and exhausting right now, the baby would come very soon and then the real work will begin.
You spent a lot of time looking at your body in the mirror, checking it out and trying to accept that you were changing forever. It was hard but Felix was there for you, taking care of you, never missing a doctor's appointment, cooking for you, his arms always open to take you into his embrace where you felt the safest.
You had no idea how you'd get through all this if it wasn't for him, so when he left to work at the end of the week, you decided to make him a chocolate cake as a thank you even though you knew the pastry wasn't enough for what he was doing for you and your baby.
You were glad you woke up feeling somewhat less nauseous that day so you could function normally. Baking the cake proved to be fun as you blasted some music and enjoyed making something sweet for Felix.
"Bubby, I'm home!" he yelled out as he walked in around 4pm, while you were cleaning up in the kitchen.
"Hey, Lixie." you smiled at him as he came into the kitchen.
"How are you feeling?" he made his way to you, his arms wrapping around you automatically.
"Good, actually." you melted in his embrace as he held you from behind, his hand sliding down to caress your tummy. It was comforting when he touched you like that.
"Something smells nice." Felix chuckled, burying his face in your hair and you could feel the tip of his nose brushing against your neck. Goosebumps appeared on your skin as you pressed your body back into his without even realizing it.
"I baked you a cake." you said, not noticing the way Felix's breath hitched when your backside pressed into his middle.
"You did?" he asked happily, moving away from you because he was moments away from losing his mind.
"Mhm, chocolate, your favorite." you said as you walked over to the fridge to take it out.
"You spoil me, bubby." he grabbed your face, kissing the tip of your nose.
You were so close to grabbing his shirt, pulling him into you and kissing his sweet, inviting lips.
"You should eat lunch first. Dessert later." you said and Felix chuckled.
"I ate at work. I want my treat." he pouted, acting all sulky and you couldn't resist his adorable face.
You cut two pieces and the two of you sat down.
Felix dug in immediately, you knew he always had the biggest sweet tooth and he baked you his brownies hundreds of times so you wanted to show your appreciation.
"Mm, I love it!" he smiled happily and your heart fluttered as he munched on the cake cutely.
"Really? Is it better than your brownies?" you smirked, teasing him and he coughed a little before smirking back at you.
"Let's not go that far." he teased back and you smacked his arm playfully as he chuckled.
Fridays were always reserved for movie night and cuddles so later that evening Felix and you were settled on the couch together.
You noticed he looked tired and kept touching his neck, grunting under his breath quietly.
"Are you in pain?" you asked and his eyes widened a little before he looked at you.
"Oh, it's nothing. I just didn't have any time to stretch today because we had this big project to finish up before weekend. Basically, my neck and shoulders are on fire but it'll pass, it always does." Felix shrugged, waving it away with his hand like it was nothing.
"Lixie, let me give you a massage. I wanna help." you offered, having no idea that the thought of your hands on him like that had Felix twitching.
"No, it's fine really. You don't need to do that, I'll just sleep it off."
"Nonsense, come on." you motioned with your hands and Felix nodded, not wanting to upset you as he turned around.
He took a deep breath in, trying to calm down as you gathered his hair out of the way, your fingertips brushing against his sensitive neck and ears, making him shiver.
A blush appeared on his freckled cheeks, spreading to the tips of his ears and down to his neck as you sat closer to him, your legs around his frame as you put your hands on his shoulders.
"You're so tense." you snickered quietly, your breath hitting his skin.
"Ha... yeah, well I was sitting at my desk all day." Felix bit his lip, shutting his eyes tightly as you started to massage him.
"Jeez, relax. You're so stiff." your gripped his shoulders, trying to roll them back a little and he laughed nervously.
"Oh you have no idea." he said and you furrowed your brows, shaking your head as you continued giving him a massage.
He managed to relax after some time as you worked your magic on his neck and shoulders. It was so quiet around you that the action felt so intimate and you found yourself scooting closer to Felix. His neck looked pretty and inviting and suddenly you just wanted to press your lips on his skin.
And that's exactly what you did as you leaned in, mindlessly pressing your lips on the back of his neck.
Felix nearly jumped out of his skin as he turned to look at you, his face red as a tomato.
"What was that for?" he swallowed and you chuckled embarrassingly, playing with your hands.
"I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking. I- I just leaned in and-"
"No, it's fine." Felix saw that you were getting upset immediately, your mood swings getting the better of you lately. "Just wasn't expecting it."
"Is you neck better?" you asked, ignoring the way your face burned.
"Oh yes, definitely. Thank you for that, bubby." he smiled at you and you felt warmness spreading inside your chest.
-
Felix laid in his bed restless. He couldn't stop thinking about your touches and the way you kissed his neck. He couldn't help it as his hand wandered down to his boxers, gripping his bulge before he started palming himself.
"Fuck." he grunted quietly, biting down on his arm as he pushed his underwear down just enough to take his leaking cock out and wrap his fingers around it.
He felt dirty for it but his mind swam with thoughts of you as he sped up, trying to finish as quickly as he could. He checked up on you earlier and you looked so sweet while sleeping soundly, he knew you felt safe with him and that was his number one goal.
He wanted nothing more than to make you feel comfortable and relaxed, to make you feel good. He wished he could cross the line and bring you pleasure the way you deserve it. With how selfish your ex was, Felix doubted he ever made any effort around you in that area too.
His mind wandered to your body then, specifically to your chest and he imagined himself sucking on your sweet nipples and that was enough to make Felix snap as he twitched and came all over his hand and abs.
He gasped, riding his high, his eyes teary.
After cleaning up quickly, he laid back in bed and fell asleep fast, trying not to think about the fact that he just touched himself to the thought of you.
-
"Lixie?" you gently knocked on his door before opening it, tears sliding down your cheeks.
"Felix?" you slowly made your way to his bed and he groaned in his sleep, his eyes fluttering open.
"Y/n?" his voice was deep and scratchy as he squinted at you. "What's wrong?" he sat up when he noticed you were crying.
"I had a nightmare." you sniffled and his expression softened as he lifted up his blanket.
"Come here, bubby." he invited you in and you plopped down in his bed, settling your back against him. It wasn't the first time you cuddled like that but you haven't shared a bed in so long, not since you started dating your ex.
Felix wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his body gently, nuzzling his face in your hair and the back of your neck.
Goosebumps rose on your skin as he caressed you gently, his hand landing on your tummy.
"Wanna talk about it?" he whispered, his lips brushing against your skin.
"N-no. It was about my ex and I don't wanna give him any more attention that he doesn't deserve."
"He's not gonna hurt you or your baby. And if he tries I will fucking kill him, so don't worry about him sweetheart." Felix held you a bit more tightly, but was still careful with your tummy.
"Lixie. I love you." you kissed his hand as your fingers entwined and he smiled.
"I love you too, bubby. More than you know."
And with that you fell asleep in Felix's safe embrace.
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After that night, you had a hard time falling asleep alone; Felix's body warmth and his comforting presence lulled you to sleep so you sneaked into his bed.
Eventually, Felix told you that you can just sleep in his bed freely every night and you were more than happy to do that.
He loved having you close, but there was a battle inside him, having to resist the craving he had for you was harder than he thought it'd be. Especially when he'd wake up in the morning and watch you sleep so soundly.
It was one of those morning where he woke up first and watched you. Your belly was bigger now along with your breasts and Felix thought you looked adorable. He was admiring you, how strong you are, after everything your ex put you through and left you alone with a baby you were taking it so well. You never complained about anything, even if you were in pain but Felix knew you too well so you couldn't hide it from him.
He wanted to make your pregnancy as comfortable as he could, the thought of you suffering made his chest hurt. Felix caressed you gently as he thought about you and how much he loves you. He couldn't help himself, the emotions that have been building up even more now that you were here and so vulnerable with him started overflowing his heart, traveling through his veins and spreading through his body.
Warmness enveloped him as his cheeks burned and he leaned in, pressing gentle kisses on your cheek, down to your jaw and neck.
You stirred a little but didn't wake up as his lips touched your skin, his hand caressing your belly.
"L-Lixie?" you muttered, still half asleep.
"Bubby." Felix grabbed your face as you turned to look at him, your eyes fluttering open just in time when he leaned down and pressed his lips on yours. You gasped a little, but still kissed back as he moved his plump lips against yours.
Your heart picked up speed and you were shocked that he was kissing you out of nowhere but at the same time it was so comforting and sweet to feel his lips against yours. Felix started letting go of everything he held back, his hands slowly sliding on your arms down to your waist and belly before resting on your hips.
He licked at your lips with his tongue and you let him in, your entire body burning up. You haven't been touched passionately since forever and being pregnant meant you were extra sensitive plus it was Felix. He was your everything.
He overwhelmed you with his scent, his warmth, his touch and you melted into the sheets as his tongue massaged yours, his hands grabbing at your plushy thighs.
You gasped for air once he leaned away, looking at you with hooded eyes.
"Lixie, w-what..."
"Shh, bubby. Will you let me worship you?" he licked at his lips as his darkened eyes ran all over your body, lingering on your breasts.
"B-but... My body doesn't look the best right now. Pregnancy did things to me like stretchmarks a-and-"
"Y/n, you look fucking beautiful. Let me show it to you." he persisted and you nodded, your heart skipping a beat in excitement.
Felix leaned down to kiss you again before his lips traveled to your jaw and neck. He licked at your sensitive spot, biting the skin and sucking on it, eliciting a small moan out of your lips.
His hands slid up to cup your breasts and you whimpered as he squeezed gently, running his thumbs on your sensitive nipples.
"Wow." he lifted up and stared at them, pressing them together and you chuckled. Felix's face became red as you looked at him intently while he played with your nipples.
He gripped the end of your shirt and you nodded so he took it off, his mouth practically watering at the sight of your body. You were left only in your panties and he could already see a wet patch appearing on them.
Felix stared at you making you feel self-conscious for a moment, your arms coming up in an attempt to hide yourself.
"Don't hide, bubby. You look perfect." he gave you a small smile, his hands on your breasts again.
"Lixie." you whispered as your breath got caught in your throat.
"Mm, they're so big." he leaned in closer to your chest. "Please." he whimpered as he massaged them gently.
"Okay. Just be gentle." you said quietly.
"Of course." he said before running his tongue over your sensitive bud.
You whimpered, instantly feeling a wave of hotness run through your body, your pussy dripping and soaking your already damp panties. Felix wrapped his pretty lips around your nipple and started sucking, his eyes fluttering shut in delight as he moaned around you.
You were getting incredibly wet, probably because of your hormones, you were more turned on than ever, your pussy throbbing for to be touched.
"L-Lix." you whined as he gently kissed your breasts, alternating between massaging them and sucking on them.
His hands slid over your belly and he smiled at you.
"You're so beautiful. And strong. You know that?" he said and your eyes watered.
"Stop praising me, I'm gonna cry." you answered, feeling sensitive everywhere.
"If it's happy tears then they're welcome." Felix pressed a kiss on your belly as he rubbed your thighs, his fingers tracing your stretchmarks.
"Is this okay?" he asked and you nodded.
He looked at your bump, almost going cross-eyed from the closeness of it and you stifled a laugh.
"Sorry baby, close your eyes and ears now." he grimaced and you let out a chuckle.
"Gotta make mommy feel good." Felix smirked at you, his hand coming closer to you panties.
He ran his middle finger on your folds and you whimpered, shivering instantly.
"So wet for me, hm?" he looked smug and your legs shook for a moment as you nodded.
"Take them off, please." you whined quietly.
"Anything you want, my sweetheart." Felix said before hooking his fingers in your underwear and sliding it down. He threw it somewhere behind him, his eyes fixed on your pretty pussy.
His brows furrowed as he brought his finger between your folds, going up and down slowly, spreading the wetness on your clit and pressing into it in circular motions. You were so sensitive that you couldn't contain your moans or your middle chasing his touch and Felix observed you, how quickly you were unraveling because of his touch.
"Can I taste you, bubby?" he gave you his puppy eyes and you giggled.
"Sure." you could never say no to that face.
Felix leaned in, the tip of his tongue licking at your clit immediately and you moaned loudly, your hand flying to his hair. He groaned when you gripped the blonde strands, encouraging him to taste you further. He let his tongue slip between your folds as he closed his eyes, enjoying your pussy like it was his last meal ever.
Your legs were shaking, automatically trying to close around his head which you couldn't even see properly because of your bump. You gripped his hair harder as you lifted up a little to see his face, his eyes closed as he kept moaning into you, looking all blissed out giving you pleasure like that.
It made you even more wet to see him enjoying it, his nose brushing against your clit perfectly as he made out with your pussy, pushing his tongue as deep as it can go, fucking you with it while he gripped your thighs.
"I'm- I'm close!" you whimpered, pulling on his hair harshly and making his eyes roll back in his head.
"Cum for me, bubby." Felix groaned, his deep voice even deeper in his arousal as he kept devouring you.
"L-Lix! Lixie!" you almost pulled all his hair out as you gripped hard, your legs closing around his head while you painted his face in your release.
Felix loved it, loved that he made you feel so good that you fell apart against him.
"Mm..." he lapped you up as you shook from your intense orgasm.
"Need more." you whispered, feeling like you were out of your mind in that moment.
"Of course, beautiful. Tell me what you need." Felix hovered over you, ready to make any wish you have come true.
"Y-your fingers." you moaned and he smirked, bringing the tips of his fingers on your folds.
"My fingers? How many?"
"Two." you answered quietly as he kept smirking.
"As you wish." Felix ran them on your wetness before slowly pushing them in. You moaned, gripping at the sheets instantly as you took in the way he looked, all disheveled and worked up from tasting you. A shiver ran down your spine as he pushed in, your pussy taking his fingers with no resistance.
"Fuck, what a good girl you are." Felix groaned as he started moving his fingers inside you, the wet sounds made your ears red in embarrassment.
"Oh you like that?" he smirked as you clenched around him. "You like being called a good girl?"
"Yes." you moaned out, pushing up into his hand as he started fucking you faster, the tips of his fingers finding that special spot quickly.
"What about my good girl?" he emphasized, making you clench around him yet again so he sped up, the force of his arm making you shake.
"Y-yes! Oh my god!" your legs shook as he started quickly flicking his fingertips over your clit while pounding into your sweet spot.
You were starting to see stars as you moaned loudly, and Felix leaned in to suck on your nipple, making it the last straw before you clenched around him and squirted all over his hand.
"Oh." you gasped as Felix looked at you.
"That's so hot." he groaned.
"Lixie, please." you felt like your mind was gone and all you could think about was his cock filling you up.
"Mm?"
"Please, fuck me." you gripped at his arm and he chuckled.
"Never thought I'd hear my sweet bubby say something so dirty." he chuckled and you smacked his arm, feeling annoyed and needy.
"Never thought this could happen but here we are." you said, pulling him closer with your legs.
Felix chuckled as he took off his underwear, now completely naked and you looked down, mouth watering at the sight of his pretty dick, all hard and leaking just for you.
He saw the way you were looking at it so he pressed his tip on your folds, massaging them a little before slowly pushing his tip in.
"Ah!" you moaned, gripping at the sheets as Felix stretched you, slowly filling you up until he bottomed out.
"You feel perfect around me, bubby." Felix groaned as he leaned down to kiss you, making you taste yourself on his lips and tongue.
Your legs wrapped around him and you brought him as close to you as you could.
"Just be careful." you whispered and he smiled, caressing you face as he looked at you lovingly.
"Always." his hands slid down to your hips as he leaned up and started moving inside you slowly, dragging his cock against your velvety walls and making you feel every inch of him claiming you.
Felix hated the fact that your ex had you like this when he didn't deserve to have you at all. He hated that it was your asshole ex who gave you a baby instead of him, the ultimate connection between two lovers.
But when Felix looked down at your face, the way you stared up at him like he hung the stars in the sky, little moans escaping your lips as you gripped at his arms, your tits jiggling with every movement of his hips and your cute baby bump, his heart softened.
He was going to love this baby as if it was his own.
Felix continued fucking you, making you cum three more times as you shook from overstimulation, begging him to just cum inside you.
"Are you sure?" he asked, his cock twitching at the thought.
"Well, I'm already pregnant, we're clean and it's not harmful so yes." you said as he slowed down, trying to keep himself sane.
"Fuck, you really want my cum inside you, hm?" he gripped your hips as he fucked you faster and your pussy clenched around his length.
"Yes- please!" you almost screamed out, your legs holding him in a death grip as he drilled his cock into your fucked out pussy.
"You're so cute like this. But I still wish I could breed this sweet little pussy." he groaned and you gasped.
"Felix!" you couldn't hold it in, squirting around his length as he grunted and fucked you harder.
"Fuck, you like that, huh?" he grabbed your breasts, both of you losing your minds completely.
"Ah yes, please breed me Lixie!" you begged and that was enough to push Felix over the edge as he spilled his hot seed inside you.
You dug your nails into his arms as the two of you rode your high together. Felix slowly pulled out of you, the sight of you laid out under him with his cum dripping out of your spent pussy made him grunt.
"So pretty." he ran his fingers on your folds, gathering his cum and pushing it back in.
"S-sensitive." you whimpered and he pulled his fingers out, bringing them to his lips as he licked at them.
"Wait a sec." Felix then got up as you stared at him, your entire body tingling in bliss. He came back with a warm wet cloth to clean you up, smiling at you the entire time as he kept caressing your soft skin.
"W-what now?" nervousness washed over you and Felix giggled as he tossed the cloth aside before leaning over you, his hands cupping your cheeks.
"I love you, that's what." he said, rubbing his nose against yours.
"I love you too, Lixie but... the baby, I don't wanna be a burden to you." suddenly your eyes teared up as sadness washed over you. "It's not even your responsibility to care about my baby."
He quickly shook his head, running his thumbs on your cheeks and catching your tears.
"You and your baby will never be a burden, because I love them as if they were mine. Maybe it's not my responsibility, but it's my pleasure." he said as he pressed gentle kisses on your lips.
"R-really? You wanna help me raise my baby?" your lips trembled as more tears raced down your cheeks.
"Of course, I wanna be here for you and the baby one hundred percent. I- I've always loved you, y/n. I beat myself up every day for not stepping in when your ex was basically holding you captive and abusing you."
"It's not your fault, Lix. I was dumb and naive, I was blind. He fed me sweet lies and I believed him, there was nothing you could say back then that would make me leave. I was stuck." you sat up, grabbing his hands in yours.
"I still feel like I should've protected you." he sighed.
"You're here now." you reassured him with a genuine smile and he searched your eyes for a moment before his face broke into the signature smile that reaches his eyes and warms up your soul.
"I am. And I don't plan on going anywhere." Felix leaned in to kiss you lovingly before pulling you into a hug, his hand caressing your head soothingly.
"I'm scared, Lixie." you whispered as you held onto him.
"Of what?" he asked as he kissed your temple.
"All of this. The baby, I'm almost half-way through my pregnancy and they're coming soon. I'm actually gonna be someone's mom."
"You're gonna be a wonderful mom, bubby. And you won't be doing any of it alone, I'm with you every step of the way." Felix said and the dam broke as you started crying again.
"I love you so much, Lixie." you held onto him like he was your lifeline.
"I love you more." Felix said as he kissed you and though you couldn't know exactly how he felt on the inside, you believed him.
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Sitting at the doctor's office as Felix squeezed your hand, you anticipated the news you've been waiting to hear for some time now.
"Congratulations, you have a perfectly healthy baby girl." the doctor smiled at you as you gasped.
"Oh." your heart swelled, now you could start making a list of names and imagine yourself with your daughter.
"That's wonderful news! Thank you, doctor." Felix smiled as you sat there speechless, thinking about the precious life growing inside you.
"Are you okay, bubby?" Felix asked as you were silent while walking to his car.
"Just realized this is becoming more real every day. Now I can imagine myself with her, I can give her a name. I'm happy." you concluded and Felix chuckled as he caressed your cheek.
"I'm happy too." he pecked your lips. "How about we go on a date to celebrate tonight?"
"Sure, I'd love that." you nodded with a smile.
Felix and you have been officially dating for a few weeks now, and you felt so safe and relaxed with him, craving his presence more and more every day.
Of course he took you out on dates, the two of you took romantic strolls in the park, bringing some food to have a picnic there, you went to the movies and sat in the love seat, cuddling the entire time and hit the best cafés in town but you never went on a fancy date.
You had one pretty dress you were saving up for a nice occasion, it hung in the back of your closet in the guest room. You had no idea if you could even put it on now but you were willing to try.
Luckily the material was stretchy and you only filled it up more, your breasts almost spilling out of it and you chuckled to yourself, knowing Felix will definitely appreciate the sight.
"Bubby, are you ready?" you heard him yell from the living room.
"Be right there!" you yelled back, looking at your reflection one more time. You were satisfied with the way you looked, pregnancy glow was a real thing and Felix kept reminding you how beautiful everything about you is every single day, adding on to the smile on your face.
"Oh, sweetheart." Felix's eyes widened when you walked into the living room.
"Is it okay?" you asked, fidgeting with your bag.
"Okay?" he chuckled. "You're absolutely breathtaking." he came closer to you, his hands sliding on your hips to your waist and belly as he caressed it gently.
He smirked suddenly, his hands cupping your breasts.
"Lixie." you chuckled, smacking his arm with your little bag and he laughed.
"Sorry, I just wanna rub my face there." he bit on his lip. "One squeeze?" Felix pouted at you cutely, batting his long eyelashes, the little menace.
"Just one." you warned and he nodded, gripping your breasts as he leaned in to kiss you roughly, his tongue swirling around yours hungrily.
When he leaned back you were breathless.
"Let's go or we will never leave." you chuckled.
"Fine." he whined playfully as the two of you made your way out.
-
Dinner was fun, finally sharing a nice meal out with Felix felt so rewarding as the two of you reminisced of high school and college days.
You realized he was there with you the entire time, he never insulted you, never yelled at you, never made you feel less than, he always made you feel so truly happy, always thinking of your needs and preferences. You've never met a man like Felix and you were thankful to have him in your life.
You wanted to show him how thankful you were as soon as you got home, your hormones were raging lately and you were constantly horny which was fun for the both of you (maybe not for the baby).
Felix was so cute to you, always hovering over you with his adorable smile and silly antics, he was like a little kitten rubbing against you whenever he could.
That was the case as soon as you sat down on the couch, he nuzzled his face between your breasts immediately.
"Mm." he sighed happily, rubbing his cheek against you as he placed his hand on your tummy.
"Having a good time?" you chuckled, caressing his head and he nodded.
"Let me make it even better."
You grabbed his face, bringing his lips to yours as you kissed him. Felix melted into you instantly, his hands on your breasts like always as he squeezed them and played with your nipples gently.
You gripped his hair, leaning his head back as you started kissing his neck and Felix whined deeply, the sound creating vibrations against your lips.
You kept kissing him, your hands roaming on his abs as you pushed them under his shirt, before sliding your hand down and gripping his bulge.
"Y/n." Felix moaned against your lips.
You smirked, leaning back as you unbuckled his pants and slowly slid down to your knees between his legs.
Felix gasped in shock, hands flying to grab your shoulders instantly.
"What are you doing?!"
"Showing you my appreciation." you kept smirking.
"Bubby please, you don't have to do that. I don't want you to kneel if it's uncomfortable or painful."
"Felix. I'm pregnant, not made of glass." you chuckled as you palmed him and you could see him losing his resolve as he melted under your touch.
"F-fine but if it's too much, stop any time. Don't think you have to do that to appreciate me." he gave you a small smirk as he cupped your chin. "It's enough when you lay all pretty for me and let me worship you." he added and you almost moaned out loud as your pussy clenched, slick gathering on your already soaked panties.
"I know but I wanna worship you too." you said, your voice becoming raspy from arousal.
"I won't stop you." he snickered as he lifted his hips so you could strip him.
You licked your lips at the sight of his cock, hooking your arms under his thighs as you brought him closer to the edge of the couch. Felix squealed from the strength you pulled him with, his cock twitching when your breath hit the leaky tip.
You leaned in closer as you wrapped your fingers around the base of his cock, your tongue on his slit, catching the beads of precum and savoring the salty taste of him. Felix held onto the the edge of the couch, nails digging into the material as you swirled your tongue around his tip before wrapping your lips around him. He groaned, his eyes full of lust as he looked down at you and you kept your eyes on him, taking more of his length in and enjoying the feeling of his hardness on your tongue.
Felix was holding back, you saw the way he was biting on his lip, his breaths ragged as he fisted at the couch cover. You slid down more, bobbing your head up and down slowly as you reached out to grab his hand. You placed his hand on your head as you moaned around him, encouraging him to relax and enjoy.
He let out a moan as he gripped your hair, your eyes fluttering shut as you sped up on his cock, fondling his sensitive balls with your hand.
"Mm, y/n." Felix groaned and you looked up at him. His was was flushed, a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead, his lips swollen because he was biting on them the entire time. Your pussy clenched at the sight of him as you continued sucking on him, determinded to make him cum in your mouth.
"Oh my god, bubby!" Felix exclaimed, his hips moving up on their own accord, his legs shaking as you bobbed your head up and down faster. He pulled on your hair making you moan around him and you gripped his balls, massaging them while your tongue swiped over the vein on his pretty cock.
"I-I'm gonna cum!" he tried to pry you off but you swatted his hand away, your brows furrowed as you whined, sliding down until your nose was buried in his pubes, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat.
"Shit!" Felix twitched, groaning loudly as he spilled his hot seed down your throat and you swallowed every single drop.
You leaned back, releasing his dick with a pop and pressing a little kiss on the tip as you caressed his thighs.
"Give me a sec." he leaned back on the couch, breathing hard and squeezing his eyes shut a few times in an attempt to come to his senses.
"You okay?" you giggled.
"Ruined. But perfect. Thank you for that." he sat up, grabbing your face and caressing your cheeks.
"You're amazing, you know that?" he added and you chuckled.
"I know. Now help me get up." you said and he gasped, quickly scrambling to stand up.
"Are your knees okay?" Felix panicked immediately and you smiled at him.
"They're fine, the rug is soft." you answered and he let out a breath.
"Good. Now, let's go to our room so I can return the favor." he smirked.
-
"We should buy some baby stuff soon." Felix said as he caressed you. You were lying on your side, the only comfortable position now, a pillow between your knees as Felix spooned you.
"Mhm. Maybe we could go shopping tomorrow."
"Yes. I was thinking... We can make the guest room into a baby room." he said, pressing a kiss to your neck.
You turned slightly to look at him, your heart fluttering.
"Really? You would do that?" you asked, your eyes teary instantly.
"I would do anything for you and your baby." he whispered with a sweet smile on his face.
"Our baby." you whispered back and his eyes widened for a moment before he chuckled happily.
"I love you so much, y/n." he kissed you gently.
"And I love you, baby." he added, sliding down to kiss your belly as you giggled.
"We love you too, Lixie."
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Entering your third trimester, you were a mess. The mood swings were strong and you felt so emotional all of the time and that coupled with the pain in your body made you cry one afternoon while Felix was at work.
You kept thinking about him and how sweet he was to you, how much he loved you and how he always put you and your baby first. You thought about your daughter and how she will be in your arms soon, your mind spinning with negative thoughts of what could go wrong an if you'll even be able to handle this.
"I'm home!" you heard Felix come in after some time but you didn't want to move.
"Bubby?" Felix searched for you, he heard sniffles coming from your room and his heart squeezed inside his chest.
"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" he approached you cautiously as you looked up at him all teary-eyed.
"I'm scared." you whispered and he was by your side instantly. You sat up and he wrapped his arms around you, soothing you as he caressed your hair.
"I don't know if I will be able to do this. If I'm fit to be a mom. Like what if she doesn't love me?" you whimpered and Felix looked at you, softly wiping your tears away.
"Of course she will love you, you're her mommy. And you will be the best mommy ever, I'm not just saying that because I love you, it's a fact."
"I don't deserve you." you cried harder and Felix shushed you immediately.
"Yes you do, bubby. We were made for each other. I don't even want to imagine my life without you. I've wanted this for so long, to be with you and to be able to call you mine. I've always dreamed of having a family with you and maybe this isn't the most regular way to start one but you know I love her like she is my own daughter." Felix said, his hands on your belly. "Oh, she's kicking."
"Yes, into my ribs." you said, both of you chuckling then. "You really mean all that?"
Felix smiled suddenly, sliding down to his knee and you gasped as your eyes widened.
"Lixie, what are you doing?" your heart started beating fast.
"This is not how I wanted to do it, I wanted to make it romantic with a ring and all." he started. "But, I can't wait anymore. I know we started dating only a few months ago but I've loved you since the day I laid eyes on you and maybe even before, in some other life. So, will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me?"
Your heart skipped a beat as fresh tears slid down your cheeks.
"Oh, Lixie." you grabbed at him. "Yes, a million times yes!" you said and he laughed happily, his eyes filled with tears too.
"I love you." you said in between the sweet kisses he showered you with.
"I love you, bubby."
"I just feel bad sometimes, you're doing all this for me and I'm not even working or doing anything to help out." you said and Felix scoffed.
"Working while pregnant? Not on my watch, bubby. You need to rest and focus on our baby. I will do everything else, I enjoy it so don't worry about not helping because the only thing I need is your love. As cheesy as this sounds, it gives me wings and nothing is hard to do when I know you appreciate it." Felix pressed a kiss to your forehead.
"I'm going to cry again." you sniffled, grabbing at his shirt.
"If it's happy tears, I've done well."
-
You decided not to wait anymore and get married as soon as possible, you had no doubts whatsoever in your mind, you knew that Felix was your person just how he was sure that the two of you were soulmates. You had a small wedding with just your family and close friends, keeping it simple due to your pregnancy.
"You look beautiful today." Felix said as soon as you got home after a little celebratory dinner.
"You tell me that every day." you chuckled, plopping down on the couch, making Felix laugh at your cuteness.
He kneeled to help you take your shoes off.
"Are your feet in pain?" he asked and you nodded with a pout. "Don't worry, bubby. I'll give you a massage."
"Come here for a sec." you waved your hand and he stood up before plopping down next to you.
"What's up?" Felix looked at you, a contemplative look on your face and a small smile spreading on your lips.
"I just need a minute to process that we are married now." you said and he chuckled, his hand finding yours, fingers entwined.
"Suits you well. To be Mrs Lee Felix." he smirked, bringing your hand to his lips and pressing a kiss into your skin.
"Don't say it like that." you whined.
"Why?" he chuckled.
"Because I'm already out of my head horny for you." you looked at him. "Hubby." you smirked and he sputtered.
"Let's just go to our room." he wiggled his eyebrows, making you laugh.
"Help me up." you reached your hands towards him and he grabbed them, lifting you and leading you to your room.
Felix helped you strip before he laid you down, his eyes raking all over your body as he took you in.
"I'm gonna worship you for the rest of my life, wifey." he said as he stripped and kneeled between your legs.
"Me too." your breath hitched as soon as he put his hands on you, running them up and down your inner thighs, coaxing you to spread your legs more. His hand slid up to your core, thumb brushing against your puffy clit, making you whimper.
He slid his fingertips on your wet pussy, leaning down to kiss and lick at your nipples.
"Felix." you moaned, hands tangling in his hair, gripping him to ground yourself.
He grunted around your nipple and started sucking on it harder, slowly pushing his fingers iniside you.
"L-Lixie. Can we change the position?" you stopped him and he lifted up immediately with a smile.
"Anything to make you more comfortable, bubby."
You slowly turned on all fours, the only position that was pleasant lately and Felix ran his hands on your back.
"You okay, love?" he asked, pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder.
"Mhm." you leaned back into him, his cock brushing against your skin and twitching.
"Someone's eager." Felix smirked behind you, grabbing handfuls of your ass.
"Stop messing around, I'm horny." you whined, your pussy dripping with arousal. He never answered so you were about to turn around but then you felt the tip of his cock on your wet lips.
"Mm." you melted into the bed as he filled you up slowly.
"Like this, bubby?" Felix teased, dragging his cock inside you slowly, one hand on your hip and the other on your back.
"Harder." you said breathlessly.
"Harder, hm?" he gripped your ass, but continued moving his hips slowly.
"Please!" you cried out and he leaned over you to whisper in your ear.
"As you wish." his breath tickled and before you could gather your senses Felix gripped your hips and set a relentless pace, shaking your entire body as his hips slapped into you.
"Oh my god." you gasped, grabbing at the bedsheets while he fucked you into tomorrow.
"My sweet wife." Felix grunted, giving you a little slap on your ass and making your pussy clench.
"I'll give you another baby, you know?" he leaned in to whisper in your ear again, the tone of his voice even lower than usually.
"Ah, yes!" you groaned as he tangled his fingers in your hair and pulled.
"You want that?" his other hand grabbed at your breast, squeezing it harshly.
"Y-yes! Yes!" your mind was foggy and all you could do was agree as you came around him, your pussy gripping his cock.
"You'll be mine forever." Felix practically growled while he gripped at you, fucking you even harder as he chased his high.
"Forever. My husband." you moaned and Felix snapped, whimpering in your ear as he pushed deep inside you, filling you up with his warm cum.
He continued fucking into your slowly as he rode his orgasm, making you cum once again.
When he pulled out you laid on your side with him behind you, and he propped himself on his elbow, peering down at you.
"Are you okay?" he caressed you face as you smiled at him.
"Perfect." Felix kissed you and the two of you cuddled for some time before you decided to clean up.
"You're really thinking about another baby already?" you chuckled when you laid back in bed to sleep and Felix's face became red as he sputtered.
"W-well I want to have a family with you." he said sheepishly and you melted. "Plus, you're so cute when your pregnant." he added with a smirk and you smacked his arm.
"Shut up."
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Your baby's arrival was nearing and Felix was doting on you until the end. He cooked for you, gave you massages, prepared you baths, he did everything he could to make this exhausting time as comfortable as it can be.
You had fun together, watching movies and playing videogames from the comfort of your home. Felix wanted you to be happy and feel good about yourself.
He even painted and built the baby's room together with some friends who helped him out and when it was done he proudly showed off his handiwork. You started crying immediately as you were touched and Felix was there to comfort you.
"This is wonderful, Lixie. I love you." you sobbed.
"Love you the most, bubby." he kissed your tears away, like he always did.
-
"God, I want this baby out of me. I can't do this anymore." you whined one day, close to your due date. Everything was ready, your overnight bag, the baby's room and of course Felix, who was buzzing constantly.
"You know sex can induce labor." he smirked at you while you laid on bed together and you threw a pillow at him.
"Anything to get into my panties, hm?"
"What? I just wanna love on my beautiful wife." he looked at you with a smug smile.
"Beautiful?" you scoffed. "I look like a whale."
"A very sexy and alluring whale." Felix said with a serious face and you gasped before bursting out into laughter.
"You're dumb." you nudged him with your foot and he slid closer to you.
"Dumb in love." he smirked as you rolled your eyes at him.
He grabbed your hands in his gently, staring at you adoringly.
The vibe in the room shifted as Felix started kissing your knuckles slowly, while keeping his eyes on yours the entire time.
"You were serious about fucking?" you chuckled.
"Not fucking. Making love to my wife." he smirked as he leaned up to kiss you.
"Cheesy." you chuckled against his lips.
"Only if you're okay with it. If not I will leave you alone. Might cry a little but I'll be fine." he pouted and you giggled.
"I'm okay with it. Just be quick, I wanna nap soon." you said, making Felix laugh.
It was cute, every day spent with you in a domestic setting made his heart overflow with happiness. He had fantasized about being yours for the longest time, never knowing just how happy he would be.
You were happy too, happiest you've ever been. Even though you still had doubts and fears about being a mom, everything was easier with Felix by your side. He gave you the right amount of comfort and support, he loved you more than anyone ever had before.
All the shitty things you went through, your strained relationship with your parents, your horrible ex, the sadness that existed inside you was now exchanged for a happiness you couldn't express in words.
-
Felix was sitting in your room, right in the middle of a game with his friends when you appeared on the doorstep.
"Felix." you said.
"Yeah, bubby? I'll be done in a minute." he didn't turn around, too concentrated on his screen.
"You gotta be done now. My water just broke."
With that, Felix's head snapped in your direction, his eyes widened as he scrambled to get up.
"Guys, gotta go. About to become a daddy." he quickly said into the mic before running to you.
"I'll grab your bag." he said, his voice shaking in panic as you started to feel the pain.
Felix drove to the hospital quickly, probably running over a few red lights.
"I can't do this!" you screamed as soon as you were situated in the hospital.
"Yes, you can bubby! Just hold my hand, okay? Break my fingers if you need to." Felix tried to be encouraging but you gave him a look.
"I'll break more than just your fingers." you threatened before screaming in agony.
Felix screamed with you, mostly because you were actually crushing his hand.
When it was time to push, Felix nearly fainted multiple times, especially when he leaned in to see the baby's head coming out.
"Oh my god." he squealed, the nurses giving him a look as you almost pulled his arm off by yanking him away from the sight.
"Stop looking." you groaned, not wanting him to pass out for real.
Felix concentrated on encouraging you as much as he could and before long, the nurse finally placed your daughter in your arms.
The feelings swirling within you couldn't be explained in mere words as you stared at the life you had created.
"Wow, she's beautiful. She looks just like you." Felix's eyes were wide as he stared at her, his heart swelling inside his chest.
"You wanna hold her?" you asked and Felix swallowed before nodding a little.
"She's so tiny, I'm afraid I'll break her." he gasped when he took her in his arms.
"You won't." you smiled at the sight, Felix holding your daughter and looking at her with so much adoration in his eyes.
You couldn't wait to go home and start your new life, just the three of you, your own little family.
-
The adjusment was hard at first, everything felt surreal and the time was going by too quickly. Your daughter was already almost 5 months old and you were wondering how the hell did all that time pass.
Felix was the most helpful husband you could ask for, everything he promised he'd do weren't just empty words and you were eternally grateful to have him.
One afternoon as you put your daughter into her crib for a nap, a knock came on the door.
Felix was in the living room and he stood up to open it just as you walked in. Both you and Felix were shocked to see your ex boyfriend standing there. You weren't expecting to see him ever again, an uneasy feeling spreading all over your body as your feet got stuck in the floor.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Felix was fuming immediately.
"I- I realized I was wrong. I want to have a family with you, y/n. I've been miserable since you left." he craned his neck trying to look at you but Felix stepped in, standing straight in front of your ex.
"It's a little late for that, buddy." Felix showed the guy his wedding ring with a smirk on his face and your ex gasped.
"You got married? To him?" he scoffed suddenly.
"I suggest you leave now." Felix ignored him as you stood there, still unsure of what to do or say.
"What a slut you are." your ex smirked and Felix snapped, quickly manhandling the bastard down to his knees as he twisted his arm back and placed his foot on your ex's back.
He yelped as you gasped, never seeing Felix this mad.
"Don't talk about her like that, scum. You never deserved her. If I ever see you anywhere near my wife or my baby I will fucking kill you." Felix growled, pressing his foot harder into his back.
"Do you understand?" he pulled on his arm, almost popping it out of place as your ex moaned in pain.
"I understand." he said through gritted teeth.
"Do you really?"
"Felix, it's okay." you intervened, not wanting him to go too far.
"I understand, alright!" your ex yelled annoyingly and Felix finally let him go as he scrambled to get up.
"Fuck the both of you." he spat before leaving and Felix watched him drive away before he turned to you, his expression softening.
"You okay?" he asked after closing and locking the door.
"God, that was so hot." you threw your arms around his neck and Felix's eyes widened as he chuckled.
"Really?" he asked and you let out a laugh as he circled his arms around you, pulling you closer to his body.
"Mhm. My sexy husband." you wiggled your eyebrows as he blushed.
"Does the sexy husband get a reward from his beautiful wife?" he smirked.
"Why of course." you chuckled, leading him to your room.
"Are you sure? We haven't since- you know. I don't wanna hurt you." Felix shook his head quickly.
"I know you'll be gentle." you said, caressing his face and tracing his pretty freckles with your fingertips.
Felix smiled softly at you, leaning in to kiss you sweetly.
"We have only while she naps though." you said as the both of your started stripping.
"Okay quick but gentle." Felix nodded, making you laugh.
You were about to strip completely, when you stopped, biting on your lip.
"What's wrong?" your husband came up to you, his hands running up and down soothingly on your arms.
"My body is completely changed. And well, it could get messy."
"I like messy." Felix smirked and you shook your head with a smile. "You have no reason to be insecure with me. I love you even more than I did before. I admire you so much, you're my everything y/n. And you'll always be sexy to me."
"Felix." your lips trembled as your eyes filled with tears but he was quick to kiss them away. "I love you so much." you breathed out between kisses as his hands traveled under your shirt before he pulled it off.
The way he looked at you erased any insecurity in your mind, Felix was mesmerized, his eyes full of love and lust.
"Lay down for me." he said quietly and you smirked.
"No, I wanna be on top."
"Oh." Felix's cock twitched, straining against his boxers painfully. "Whatever you want, bubby." he licked his lips, no thoughts behind his eyes whatsoever as he kept staring at your full tits.
You pushed him down on the bed, stripping him out of his underwear so you could have all of him on display for you to play with.
You crashed your lips into his before kissing his jaw and his neck, your lips traveling on his skin, touching every precious freckle. Your nipples kept brushing against him and Felix whined, pushing his cock up towards you.
His hand flew to the back of your neck as he brought your face to his, kissing you again.
"Ah!" he groaned when your fingers wrapped around his length, giving him a few pumps as you observed his face, twisted in pleasure.
You hovered over him and he gasped.
"You're so good to me, bubby. I'm so lucky to have you." he whimpered as you ran his tip on your wet cunt.
"I'm the one who's lucky. I get to use this cock whenever I want." you smirked as you pushed the tip between your folds.
"Oh my god." Felix groaned, pushing up towards your heat. "Yes, yes, use me whenever you want!"
You slowly slid down on him and sat still, adjusting to the feeling of him inside you after some time. Felix kept staring at your tits and you smirked.
"You want these?" you grabbed them gently, jiggling them a little and you felt him twitch inside you.
"P-please. Can I- can I taste it?" he gave you his puppy eyes and you clenched at the thought.
"You wanna taste my milk?" you asked and Felix panicked.
"N-no, I'm sorry, I don't know why I said that! I'm sorry if that's weird, you totally don't have to." he sat up a little, his cock brushing against your sweet spot.
"I want you to." you said and he stared at you, his eyes wide.
"Really?"
"Yeah. Come on. Wrap your lips around it." you leaned over him, your breasts in his face and he whined as you dripped around his cock, slowly moving your hips in circles.
"Y/n." Felix moaned before giving your nipple a few kitten licks then wrapping his lips around it.
You gasped as he started sucking greedily, the taste of your sweet milk making him become rock hard inside you. Felix moaned as he swallowed, grabbing at your breast and squeezing it.
"L-Lixie!" you moaned loudly as he flipped you over, fucking into you, his hands on your breasts and lips around your nipple, drinking from you.
He couldn't get enough, fucking you with a semi-fast pace as he kept sucking on your tits. You felt so aroused, your body sensitive and you came, squirting around his cock.
"Fuck, bubby!" Felix licked at his lips, his eyes rolling back as he pulled out, jerking his cock until he came, ropes of white cum landing on your tummy and chest. You pouted at him, grabbing at his arm.
"Why didn't you finish inside?"
"I had to pull out or I'd get you pregnant again." he groaned and you giggled, biting on your lip.
"So what?"
"Baby, don't tempt me." Felix whined and you chuckled. "You should take some time to heal."
"I love that you're so caring but sometimes I wish you were just a little bit inconsiderate." you teased as he brought you into his chest, cuddling with you.
Felix laughed, the sound shaking your body as he held you close.
"Okay, I'll be a bad boy next time and forget to pull out." he smirked.
"Mhm." you smirked back and leaned in to kiss just as your daughter started crying.
"She's awake and hungry." you sat up and Felix kissed your shoulder before leaning his chin on it.
"I might be hungry for something sweet later too." he smirked and you smacked him as he laughed.
"I'm sure you will be."
-
Fall came around and with it all of the pretty colors had painted the leaves, it was your and Felix's favorite sight to see so you decided to go on a little stroll to the park with your daughter.
Felix pushed the stroller as you held onto his arm, taking in the scenery around you and the fresh air smelling of rain about to fall.
"What are you thinking about?" Felix asked.
"You. How happy we are." you smiled as you looked at him.
"I'm so happy." he smiled back sweetly and your daughter fussed a little.
"She's growing so quickly." you sighed wistfully and Felix nodded.
"She is. We can always make another baby." he added and you chuckled.
"I'd love that."
Later that afternoon, the rain poured outside as you sat under a warm cozy blanket with your loving husband and your sweet daughter, safe from any harm. You couldn't imagine a better life than this.
And it was all thanks to Felix loving you and making you love yourself again as the scars on your heart healed one by one.
~taglist: @moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @hwanghyunjinismybae @jehhskz @porangporangmeong @laylasbunbunny @laughatdanger @jeonginslefthand @sapphirewaves @s3ungm1nxxl0ve @painterhyunjin @starlost-mochi-x @saintcosette @ooshyana @frehyun @scarlet789 @skzdust @schniti-is-in-the-house @eastjonowhere @sona1800 @channiesrightasscheek @justwonder113 @yvettemint @inaribu00 @httpdwaekki @possum-playground @ria-april @yn-x-them @mariahxrrera @halfwinterhalfuniverse
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alexmasonistired · 8 hours ago
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Id like to start this off by saying that this is an absolutely lovely post; thank you OP for making it. Now I would like to share our own experience with the education system in general, and what our state called- “Critical minds classes”.
Now if you don’t know what that is- it’s a thing in our state where 30 kids are chosen by the state to go into these special critical minds classes. We in particular were put in critical minds math and let me tell ya- IT FUCKING SUCKED.
All the class was, was us sitting in a certain spot that we could not move from the ENTIRE OVER AN HOUR THAT WE WERE IN THERE in SILENCE while working on these list of MathXL links. And if you know how MathXL works- yeahhh it was absolutely awful. Some of the worst parts of that class though, was that we had to keep our bags up front the entire time and we wouldn’t get anything because we wasn’t allowed out of our seat, and worst of all- the teacher that lead the class, always seemed like she just didn’t wanna be there. She felt intimidating to us so we never were able to approach her with our getting insanely nervous. She reminded us of the bodies mother with the way she looked so that made it worse. (Also edit: I just remembered- I believe for a good chunk of the first half of the semester she was watching our computers??)
Btw- remeber those check lists of MathXL links that I mentioned earlier??? Yeah. There was like- 18-20 of those links on these checklists that we used to have a month to complete! But then it was shortened to only a WEEK because the semester was ending and she needed to get grades in ig.
We had a whole ass panic attack infront of our history teacher becuase we were on list SIX, and there was TEN of these things to do. And I swear it felt like each list just had more links- we fucking hated it. I believe we finally made it to list eight before we eventually gave up and let the burn out take us over and just wrote in our diary the entire period. Except for the days we had quizzes and did blookets, which was hardly ever. At that point we were just SO fucking done of just not being able to understand ANYTHING put in front of us no matter how hard we tried. We just barely passed that class with a D.
I also remeber that we went to summer school after seventh grade because our grades were so low our teachers didn’t know if they could pass us. It was the same with in fifth grade, the teachers were nervous to let us go into middle school because we were just barely passing. Our grades were that bad.
We got to this point(the whole critical minds math thing and giving up,) because ever since like- second grade, we had been having massive trouble with math and grades and over all just confidence in general. Especially in the math field.
I remember we began cheating on a lot of our assignments and tests in second grade because our confidence had been bumped down that badly, and we just couldn’t really understand it. Or at least I believe that we couldn’t understand it- I’ll get into second grade math in another post. Regardless, we ended up sizing cheating as a last ditch effort a lot in school because we got to a point where we felt like we didn’t have a choice.
We would try so hard at something in math, only for our brain not being able to remember it, how to do it, and for it to also not make sense in our brain. It absolutely crushed us one day when we ended up in an argument with the father one day over another bad math grade and we yelled: “Is my best not enough not for you!?” And he just yelled back: “NO!” That day crushed us. The father always says that we just weren’t applying ourselves enough, which hurt even MORE because we WERE applying ourselves more, we WERE trying, and as hard as we could too! But we can only do so much, but it honestly seems like the parents, especially the father, just cannot realize that. And it hurts us, so much.
We always saw our friends in school absolutely soar and it was fucking awful how they would be getting into honors classes, getting to go up a grade or even graduate early, and then we would be sitting here in what is supposed to be an “extra help” class when in reality it didn’t help us at all. Due to our mental disabilities/Illnesses, we weren’t able to learn like the other kids were able too. All we’ve ever wanted was to be smart enough to be able to fly through school like our friends, study efficiently, and get our diploma normally like any other kid, but no. We didn’t have that experience and we never will due to our life and the way that our brain works and we fucking hate it.
There was also of times where we felt stupid, useless, and pathetic for not being able to keep up with our allistic, and non-ADHD-having peers. It especially was rough considering that that was the standard our parents set us too all the time, and we just could not reach the standards that she and the father set for us.
We tried tutoring a few times, but it honestly didn’t help much either. We never ever got the help that we needed growing up and I know that we never will get the help we need. And I hate it. So many people failed us when it came to education and I look back and can’t help but feel bad for us. We were just a young, neurodivergent kid with a dissociative disorder along with many other disorders alone with it, and a complete mess too. A mess that no one really bothered to help with. It was awful.
What we needed back then was one-on-one assistance with someone who could understand us and what was going on with us, we never got that. And that was because everyone around us failed us. Either failing to recognize our needs, or just not thinking that we needed them because it wasn’t super duper obvious that we did.
Kinda fucked up that we all coo and sympathize with "former gifted kids" but never talk about the students who had to stay late after school or over the summer for remedial classes/clubs, who struggled to get above a C, who were given up on or punished. Who tried so hard to understand or just couldn't. Who were grouped with the "stupid kids" (a classmate called us that in remedial math btw)
Autistic kids and adhders who can't relate to their gifted peers and are constantly alienated by them. Kids who struggled in school due to dealing with a chronic or mental illness or physical/learning/developmental disability. Those of us who have had to drop out of highschool or college. Kids who worked so hard and wanted to be seen as smart, but never were. Who watched as their peers seem to fly by them in school, while they were left behind. Who were bullied and put down by those in the gifted and honors classes. Whose confidence was absolutely destroyed by education.
I love you all and I'm so sorry the school system failed you. I'm sorry you weren't properly accommodated and given the education you deserved. I'm sorry people put you down for something that they never had to fight for.
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messrsrarchives · 2 days ago
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we are incredibly blesseddddd in the harry potter fandom. no matter what era you are reading, there is such a wide array of fics for you to enjoy - such a multitudeeee of long-fics, aus, ships, tropes etc etc. we are so blessed to have this much to engage with.
but with that comes a lot of entitlement i feel. because there's more to "compare", there's more to call "the big fics" or "the best fics" and suddenly we're no longer blessed, because people don't appreciate fandom for what it is - a bunch of losers (affectionate) sitting in their rooms, writing fanfiction about wizards in their spare time, and sharing it with strangers online. rather it starts becoming competitive.
and 99.99% of the time, it's not the people writing these fics that start the comparisons and the competitions, it's those reading it. they'll publicly question why a fic has so many hits, they'll assume that fandom etiquette no longer applies just because a fic is popular, and they'll forget that these are people writing them, not just ao3 pseudonyms. they'll critique writing styles, get hung up on typos or grammatical errors etc etc. they'll start saying which piece of creative writing done by a person in their free time as a hobby is "worth it" and which ones aren't. and it's wild because they're the ones that have put these fics at the top. they're the ones that have decided these fics are the most worthy,,, and then they critique them?
and most of this is because of the hierarchy, absolutely. there's been a mass separation of readers-writers because people refuse to engage, and they start viewing themselves as "customers" receiving a "product" and they complain when it doesn't fit their standards. some of it is also the changing face of fandom spaces as they get big on more traction-based platforms like tiktok. all of it comes down to entitlement.
they start enforcing standards for fanfictions to live up to and start dictating what "good" writing is, as if that doesn't go against the very nature of a fandom space. a space where everybody's voice is heard and everybody has the same opportunity to create things (side tangent: this is not the time to be dictating what voices/experiences/talents deserve to be heard. free and open sources of literature are incredibly important right now. we often talk about the fact we hold fanfiction to the same standard as publit, which yes we do and that is not what we should be doing. but now we're starting to police it the same way publit is, and now is not the time. there is never a time tbh, but now when book bans are running rampant across the world? you want to decide which fics deserve to be read and which ones don't? hm).
and the worst thing is that not only are people critiquing the works we already have, but they demand more.
they'll say there's no more long-fics getting written, and then they won't go and engage with WIPs and encourage authors to continue, they won't start a fic until it's complete and then complain that nothing is complete. they'll say there's not enough fics for a certain ship, and instead of engaging with those producing them or encouraging love and engagement for them with others, they'll go into comment sections and hate on another ship. they'll say there's not enough of a certain trope and then they'll read one and go "hm. not like that" or not enough of a certain character and then go "actually i don't see them like this so this is written awfully".
most of all, they'll say that certain fics or ships have a ruined a fandom, and then they'll post things that go sooooo against what a fandom is, and just add to what is actually ruining wider fandom spaces - entitlement.
you are not entitled to long-fics, these are being written by people in their free time, and you refuse to engage with them as they're being written. you are not entitled to perfect grammar and presentation, fanfiction is for everybody and it is not a profession, it's a hobby. you are not entitled to the characterisations that you deem to be best, everything is malleable and you engage with what you like (better yet, write it yourself if you're so open to shitting on others. you do it then). you are not entitled to regular and consistent updates, you do not get a monopoly over this person's time. and you're going to see a lot less works over time if this is the way you treat them.
you are not entitled to any content in a fandom space, and no one is required to provide it for you. and most of all, your opinions and your characterisations and things you enjoy are not more worthy than anyone elses' - reading is subjective, we learnt this in primary school.
fandom is for self-exploration and it is self-curated. it's so self-curated and if you are having such a negative time in fandom because you can't find anything "good" or "worth it"? maybe there's some self-reflection to do as well. maybe you should sit and wonder why you feel entitled to things and why you feel the need to pit authors against each other or critique free works publicly, instead of wondering why other people are reading them.
we are so incredibly blessed to be in a fandom as diverse as this one with such an array of interpretations and such a wide spread of fics to choose from, but let's return to our roots and remember that - despite how many there are - everything is written by a Human Being. in their Free Time. For Fun.
and it's not fun to watch videos calling works bad get thousands of views and likes. you are not owed anything. and it is not okay to say these things just because "they'll never see it" - it says a lotttt about you as a person that there has to be some kind of impact for you to be kind.
it's like,,, would you go to a free bake sale and go "god i fucking hate red velvet!!!" and tell them they're doing a bad job, or would you pick up the chocolate cupcake you like instead and move on with your day whilst acknowledging that someone, not you but someone elseee, might like red velvet??? ykkkk??? you get me????
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leighsartworks216 · 1 day ago
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What's the Whole World
Sylus x gn!Reader
Wrote this when I was overstimulated and extra emotional from my period iykyk
Title from "What's the Whole World" by Warmer
Warnings: hurt/comfort, established relationship, cuddling, crying, swearing
Word Count: 1,395
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Your apartment building's hot water isn't working, so you take a freezing cold shower. Your bike doesn't start, so you have to take the bus. You forgot to eat breakfast, so you go to the vending machine, except the snack gets stuck against the glass. You don't get to eat lunch because you get sent on back to back missions. You have to stay late to finish the paperwork for said missions. The food you buy at a late night stall is too expensive and almost too overcooked to eat.
But through all of that, through every little thing the world does to spite you today, one thought kept you sane: Sylus. You don't have work for the next couple days and Sylus moved things around on his schedule to spend all of that time with you. Being able to spend time with him is the one thing holding you together right now.
Imagine your disappointment when you get to his base in the N109 zone, excited to see him after the ungodly public transport you had to take, only to be told by Luke and Kieran that he isn't there. Not only that, they're not sure when he'll be back, after he zipped off to meet up with someone for whatever business venture he's planning on branching off to next. They offer you a ride back to your place, but the thought of going back home, to your freezing water and cramped walls, only makes you feel worse.
So you do the next best thing: you curl up in Sylus's bed, hugging a Grumpy Crow plushie, and try really hard not to cry.
You feel hollow. A void in your chest, opening its maw wide to swallow your hope, optimism and joy, regurgitating loneliness and disappointment in its place. It shouldn't be that big of a deal. Things happen, stuff comes up. Especially when you're the leader of a giant illegal faction, and owner of god knows how many businesses. Just... why didn't he tell you about it?
Tears sting your eyes. You don't want to cry. Not here, not in Sylus's bed. Could anything be more pathetic? You should have just gone home. At least there you could drown yourself in a mountain of ice cream without having to worry about being seen making the trip to and from the kitchen.
The longer you suppress your emotions, the more your brain reminds you of the shit day you've just had.
The cold water meant taking an extremely quick 10 second shower. The bus ride was so cramped you were pressed up against so many other commuters. The only thing you've eaten today wasn't worth the price, leaving a hole in your stomach yet to be satisfied. Your whole body aches, from your arms and shoulders to your back and legs. You're tired, you're upset, and all you were asking for to compensate for all of that bullshit is a hug. Just one hug! A hug this plushie certainly wasn't providing.
You curl around the crow plushie, squeezing it with the remaining strength you have in your arms. You press your face into its soft head, the ruffle around its neck tickling you. You take a deep breath. And you cry. The worst kind of crying: deep heaving gasps for air, ragged sobs that grate at your throat, fat tears that have no end and soak deep into the fabric of the plushie and Sylus's pillow; body shaking, soul crushing, pathetic. You want the bed to open up and swallow you whole. You want Dr. Zayne to go in and remove your heart to spare you the pain. You just want this horrible feeling to go away, by any means possible.
God knows how long you cry for. It feels like hours. Your eyes burn, raw from all the moisture. Your cheeks are sore from the horrible grimace your face pulls with your sobs. The crow is completely soaked where your face is.
The bed shifts, slowly. Hesitantly. You choke up again, because you already know who it is.
A hand touches your arm. You automatically flinch out of its grasp. A bitter part of you wants to make him feel just as bad as you do. Wants to lie here crying while he's forced to watch. But, god, that one touch alone is like the sun after weeks of rain. It's like a splash of bright yellow against the dark, saturated hues that compose your sorry state. And when he doesn't touch you again, it's consumed once more by the darkness.
"What happened?" he asks. His voice is so soft, tinged with protectiveness. If someone hurt you, he'd take care of it. He'd do anything to take this heartache from you. All you would need to do is say the word. What, then, are you supposed to say if he's the one that hurt you?
Another sob wracks your body. You curl in impossibly tighter, as though you could shrink yourself down to the size of a pea to hide from his intense gaze on your back. Your throat hurts from crying so hard.
"Can I touch you?" he asks next, when you don't respond.
Your body and mind want two different things. Your mind wants to hold strong to your newfound loneliness, but your body yearns to crawl to him, to collapse in his arms, to finally, finally get that hug you were waiting for.
It's your body that wins out, in the end, but you refuse to give in completely to its desires. So instead of seeking him out, you just nod and wait for him to come to you.
He does, almost right away. He touches your arm again. When you don't pull away, he closes the space left between you. His chest presses against your back, legs tucked right up to yours. His arms wrap around your body, securely keeping you against him. He presses his face to the back of your neck. Like this, he feels every tremor and shiver of every gasp and sob. Like this, you feel encapsulated in his warmth and comfort. It's almost overwhelming. It almost suffocates you with how amazing it feels to finally be held by him.
He kisses the fine hairs on your neck in a delicate peck, silently telling you how badly he wants to help. "Will you tell me what happened, sweetie?"
You dig your fingers into the Grumpy Crow's plush body. They tremble with emotion. "You weren't h-here," you whimper out. Your voice is awful. "'N y-you didn't say a-anything about it."
"I didn't...?" One of his arms slips away. He digs his phone out of his pocket and taps quickly at the screen, before dropping it to the bed behind him with a sigh. His arm returns to its rightful place around you, squeezing you slightly tighter. "It didn't go through, kitten. I'm sorry."
That text was meant to get to you hours ago. Unfortunately, he must have lost service before it could go through. So for hours, you were left in the dark, literally and metaphorically, with no idea where he was or what he was doing.
He kisses your neck again. "How can I make it up to you? Name anything - it's yours."
Anything? There's only one thing you want. And now that you know his radio silence wasn't intentional, your mind loses the reins holding your body back.
You push the crow plushie away. It rolls sadly across the bed, dark fabric stained darker with tears and fluff rearranged so he's squished into an odd shape. Sylus lets go when you squirm in his hold. You turn around and immediately cling onto him. You hide your face in his neck and he cradles the back of your head to keep you there. His cologne floods your senses, accompanied by his body wash, warming you in a way the lingering scent on his pillow and bedsheets never could.
"Just want you." You grip the back of his shirt in your fists, squeezing him as tightly as you can, just like you'd done to the plushie. Except he's solid, and he squeezes you back just the same. "Please don't go."
"I'm not going anywhere," he promises. "We'll stay here for as long as you want."
"Forever."
"Okay, sweetie." He kisses your head. "We'll stay here forever."
---
Tag List:
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wosoloml · 2 days ago
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— second chance || emily fox x reader
[ “I messed up by breaking up with you, because ever since then, I’ve been missing you everyday.” ]
summary: After having her heart broken by Emily, the reader decided to seize the opportunity for a fresh start in her career by moving to London. Little did she know, her worst nightmare wasi about to come true. But sometimes, nightmares have a way of transforming into the sweetest of dreams.
from this request
wc: 1,744 words. | masterlist
warnings: fluff, mention of heartbreak, angst, secret flirtings, jealousy, happy end
——-
"There is no future for us. I need to leave," were the last words Emily said to me as she walked out of our apartment. Well, not our apartment anymore.
This was the last thing I expected when I came home after interviewing the local handball team, excited to share some amazing news I had received at work.
I walked in with the biggest smile on my face, and we both said at the same time, "I want to talk to you about something." Little did I know that by the end of the conversation, I’d be alone in what used to be our home.
Usually, I’m the one who shares big news first, but this time, I decided to let Emily go ahead. I thought she’d need time to process the fact that the Arsenal Football Club had offered me a position on their media team. Letting her start felt like the considerate thing to do.
What a mistake that turned out to be.
If I’m honest, I don’t even remember how I survived the first night. Curled up in my bed, crying my eyes out, and consumed by the question, "Why?"
Everything began a few years ago when we met at UNC. It started with a little crush on the athletic girl, stealing glances every time we passed each other in the hallway.
After months of back-and-forth and a lot of help from our friends Alessia and Lotte, we finally started dating. It was never easy, especially with football becoming such a big part of Emily’s life, but she always treated me like I was the girl of her dreams. I couldn’t have been happier.
Doing long-distance was a significant challenge for us. She signed her first professional contract with Racing Louisville FC, while I was just starting my first year at the sports journalism academy. But our love was always stronger—stronger than any distance or circumstances. We were supposed to be a team.
Everything became so much easier and better when she finally moved back after joining North Carolina Courage. It felt like the greatest relief.
For days after she told me she was coming back, I fell asleep and woke up with the biggest smile on my face.
Eleven months, two cats, and one apartment later, here I am—without anything. I lost the love of my life simply because she "needed to focus on her career."
We were a team, but now she preferred a solo performance.
She was even too cowardly to come here and pick up her things when I was home. The only message I got from her was:
"When does your shift start, so I know when to get my stuff?"
- EF
EF? Is she serious? We spent the last six years together, went through everything, and shared so many firsts. And the only thing she adds to her message are her initials?
It's pathetic.
---
At 9:00, I arrived at the base camp of THE Arsenal Women's Football Club for this year's training camp in Spain.
It’s been a year and a half since I made the decision to start fresh and begin a new life. A year and a half since a certain American girl broke my heart. Coming to London was the best decision I ever made.
One of my closest friends from college is here with me. Without Lessi and Lotte’s support in those early months, I don't know where I'd be. I came to London with nothing but two cats and a suitcase. Now, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.
"Y/N!!" I heard a familiar voice shout my name. As I turned around, I saw my favorite defender.
"Lottee, my girl!" I grinned, my smile growing wider as I pulled her into a tight hug.
"How’s my favorite girl? Ready for today’s media day? The first one during training camp in Spain?"
She chuckled. "I can’t wait to get sunburned. You know my British skin isn’t used to that much sun."
As I followed Lotte to her first media date of the day, we passed the changing room, and I suddenly heard a familiar voice. My heart stopped. This can't be real. No, it's not real—maybe I just overheard something.
"What's up, Y/N?" Lotte immediately noticed the shift in my behavior, but I tried to play it cool.
"Nothing. I just thought I heard someone's voice, but that can't be real," I replied.
She nodded, but I could sense a slight change in her mood.
I’m just paranoid. That’s it, for sure.
"Y/N? Could you possibly anchor the 'First Day at Arsenal' segment with our new signing today? It's not public yet that she transferred to London, but we wanted to take advantage of our training camp in Spain to shoot some nice scenes," the media team leader said.
I looked at him, confused. "I didn't know we got a new signing."
"Really? Everyone knows that. Especially Alessia and Lotte Wubben-Moy—they already know her from previous teams. Funny, huh?"
No. I’m just paranoid again. I know it. This cant be happening.
---
"Hey y/n".
That's it. That's the moment I’ve been scared of the whole day. No, scratch that—I've been scared of it for the last 18 months.
I haven’t heard her voice since that specific day she left me in our old apartment. I thought I’d be okay hearing my name from her lips again. God, was I wrong.
"Since when are you here?" I had to hold myself back from laughing at my own question. The first thing I asked her after she cut me out of her life was when she came to Arsenal. If someone had told me this morning that I’d say that, I would’ve laughed in their face.
"My plane from North Carolina landed this morning. It’s not official that I’ve transferred, but they decided spontaneously that I could join the girls here at camp already. I didn’t know you were working here, I promise. I would’ve told you about the transfer."
It’s over for me now. A small chuckle escaped my lips. "You would’ve told me? What would you have said to me? 'Hey, Y/N, by the way, I’m moving to the club where you work, after destroying your life a year and a half ago. Ready to ruin your new life too?' Because that’s what you’re doing right now. You’re destroying my new life. I came to London with nothing. But not with me, Emily. This time, you won’t take everything from me. This is my home."
I slightly shouted at her. She just stared at me. I’m done with her now. Turning around, I left.
---
As the days pass, I have to admit that maybe I’m not completely over her.
It all began when we both became nervous around each other during the "First Day at Arsenal" segment, and it continued with secret touches on the beach and our eyes searching for each other in a room full of teammates and staff.
It’s been difficult to admit that I still get butterflies when she’s near, and that this chapter isn’t as closed as I once thought. Am I ready to let her in again? She hurt me in a way no one else ever has, and that’s something I’ll never forget. But I just miss her, that’s all. Nothing more... or is there more?
It was our last evening in Spain, and the entire staff and team went out for drinks at a local bar. This time, my mind wasn’t occupied by a certain brunette American.
Instead, it was an Irish defender who caught my attention.
It wasn’t the first time Katie McCabe and I had spent time together outside of work. I wouldn’t exactly call it flirting, but we always had a good time laughing together. She knows how to talk to a woman, and let’s just say she’s not hard on the eyes either, so it’s a win-win situation, isn’t it?
When Katie rested her hands on my waist, it was enough to set Emily off. She grabbed me by the arm and pulled me outside. I was too stunned by her actions to even react.
"Is she your new girl?" she asked, her voice sharp. I had to hide a smirk.
"What do you mean, Emily?"
"You heard me. Is Katie McCabe your new girlfriend?" I chuckled again, maybe a bit tipsy from the drinks Katie had bought for me.
"No."
Emily didn’t believe me. I could see it in her eyes.
"Then explain to me why you’re giggling at every statement she makes and why the hell are her hands allowed on your body?"
My face grew serious. "What’s this, Emily? Are you jealous of someone who’s just being friendly? You? The one who ended this relationship, if I may remind you?"
That was it. That was the boiling point for Emily.
"I messed up by breaking up with you, because ever since then, I’ve been missing you every single day," she shouted, her voice frantic. My eyes widened, and my heart melted at her words.
Without thinking, I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers.
"Finally!" Lotte and Alessia cheered from inside the bar. Finally.
The plane landed in London. Coming back home, my hands locked with the girl I’ve always loved. This is us now—forever.
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cumaeansibyl · 1 day ago
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I think some people can't let themselves enjoy anything unless they can convince themselves it's serious and meaningful and important. If it doesn't have a moral message they can't justify spending time on it.
Some of the worst science fiction is bad in part because it beats the audience over the head with the SOCIAL COMMENTARY hammer, and some of the best is good in part because it has zero point other than "wouldn't it be fucked up if." Star Trek and Twilight Zone hit both ends of that spectrum repeatedly.
So obviously, the most obnoxious and useless sort of science fiction criticism is provided by angry dumb guys screaming into microphones about things being “woke”; but I also get annoyed by the people who insist on applying a sort of “roman-á-clé” reading, where everything in the story is merely a disguised stand-in for some real-world human political issue. Like, yes, obviously, sf is used for social and political commentary a lot of the time; but it’s *also* used to just kind of play around on the frontiers of possibility. And it frankly seems kind of demeaning to the genre to pretend that its alien, its bizarre, and its inhuman features are necessarily just stand-ins for some mundane, real-world concept. Like, yes, clearly The War of the Worlds is about colonialism; but it’s also about alien life; it’s also about evolution and ecology; and it’s also about “Wouldn’t it be fucked up if THIS happened!?” And all of these are irreducible from the genre. Is your robot autistic? Well, maybe you can read it that way. Maybe it’s a sincere attempt to imagine a nonhuman mechanical intelligence. Maybe it’s both. Sometimes, you write a story strictly for “Wouldn’t it be fucked-up if…” purposes and it ends up shedding a whole new light on the human condition; in fact, I think that, if you’re taking your concept seriously, it should do this by default. But you have to take the bizarre on its own terms or you might as well be reading realism.
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pencil-n-pen · 2 days ago
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OVERWORKED
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✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
leon kennedy x fem! reader
summary: You’re still struggling with overworking. Leon shows you when it’s time to take a break.
previous (not required but gives some context)
cw: once again, female pronouns used but reader’s features are not described, some suggestive content, dom! leon much more heavily this time, very not subtle praise kink (use of good girl), pet names, tbh rating COULD be pg-13 but i don’t write nsfw so minors ur fine :) uhhhh non-sexual sub-space if you squint?
tags/tropes: once again hurt/comfort, cuddles, leon being touchy again (reader is just as touchy honestly) soft dom behavior (leon)
a/n: a little continued drabble for those of u who asked/liked the last one !! hope u like it @cherryandsugar <3
MY ELDEST DAUGHTERS WITH PRAISE KINKS MAKE SOME NOISE 🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️💯💯💯
。𖦹°‧⭑.ᐟ
You’re overworking again.
You don’t mean to, necessarily. It’s just always what you do. Work, work, work. It needs to get done, so you do it. No matter how tired you are, no matter how much you don’t want to do it. No matter how many tears get shed. It needs to get done. You have to do it. So you do it.
Leon’s been taking issue, with it though.
You’re not really sure what you are to each other, yet. He definitely finds you attractive —he tells you pretty much everyday, an almost overuse of words like hot, sexy, cute, amazing, and of course, his favorite; princess.
He occasionally comes over to the place you and a few other girls rent together and does his absolute best to be as distracting as possible. Sometimes he cooks, sometimes he gets touchy, sometimes he just sits on your bed and watches you work which is, in your opinion, by far the worst one.
When he’s not bothering you in the comfort of your own home, he’s sitting next to you in the couple classes you share, a distracting hand on your thigh that he squeezes when you get a question right— something that never fails to make you breathless and dizzy for a few minutes afterwards. Between the sight of his hand engulfing your thigh and the frequency of your correct answers, it’s a miracle you don’t asphyxiate during class.
You did come close, once. It was a week after what you’ve dubbed The Library Incident, and the professor had singled you out as one of his most consistent students when it came to turning in homework. Leon had leaned down, his lips brushing the shell of your ear and whispered, all low and rumbly:
“Good girl.”
You didn’t get a single thing out of the lecture for the rest of class.
(You’d then given him the silent treatment, but he made up for it by you sending you his rather extensive and detailed notes from the lesson with a single text: “Better learn to multitask, princess.”)
So yeah. He isn’t a huge fan of your studying habits. Something he’s made abundantly clear.
“When was the last time you got up?” He grumbles, walking into your room with your now full reusable water bottle. You’d abandoned it in the kitchen a few hours ago. He’s such a stickler about your water intake.
“Who are you, my mother?” You pause, looking up at the mischief in his eyes and the way his mouth is open, poised to say something, likely dirty. “Don’t answer that.”
You reach out with grabby hands towards your water bottle, which you know is filled with some delicious water combination, courtesy of Leon. Shit, he’s Pavlov-ing you into drinking water, isn’t he?
He rolls his eyes, handing you the bottle. “You know, you can make this exact same water yourself with the items in your fridge. Which I put there. For you. To use. Yourself.”
“You make it better,” You answer smoothly, ignoring his sarcasm. Ooooh. It’s minty strawberry today.
“Oh?” He says with a raised eyebrow, a signature Leon smirk on his lips. The same one he always gets when you admit to liking him in some way.
“You’re such an attention whore. Isn’t that why you came over here?”
“Ouch. So touchy,” He tuts, draping himself over your back and resting his chin on your head. “But no. I came over here to drag the lovely and beautiful and terribly stubbornly princess away from her desk because she’s overworking again.”
You tense. “I can’t, Leon. Not right now. I have to finish this.”
“Do you?”
“Yes.”
“What happens if you don’t?”
“I get behind and then I can’t catch up and then I fail—“
“Woah, now,” He says, standing and spinning your desk chair so it faces him instead of your work. “None of that is going to happen if you take a break. We both know your work ethic is too good for that.”
You start worrying your lip between your teeth. “But—“
“Hey,” He says, a gentle, slow hand reaching out and brushing your lip away from your teeth. “None of that. Leave your lip alone.”
You wince. It’s a mindless action, the same way you pick at your hangnails and other parts of your skin when you’re stressed. “Sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry for. Just don’t want my girl hurting herself more than she already is.”
You ignore the latter part of his sentence and focus on the first. “Your girl?”
“Yeah,” He says, tilting his head and looking down at you with a small smile on his face. “My girl.”
You look down at your hands, fidgeting with the hem of your sweatshirt. “I won’t be able to sleep or relax if I don’t finish this. It— I can’t.”
He takes the side of your face in his hand, thumb sweeping across your cheek and beneath your eyelid. “I know, baby. But you work too much.”
“But I have—“
“You have to, I know. I know you’re hardwired for independence and overworking. So how about this. Take a break, lie down in bed with me, and then finish only what you’ve already started.”
You start chewing on your lip again. “I—“
His fingers deftly move down to your jaw, grabbing it firm, thumb pressing on the edge of your lip and pulling it down, away from the merciless bite of your teeth. His grip leaves no room for argument, but you don’t feel frightened or scared. In fact, your stomach is doing flips at the careful, gentle control in the press of his hands and the fondness in his eyes.
“I know I phrased that very nicely, but this isn’t an argument, sweetheart. You need to rest. Your brain needs time to recharge. What happens if you get sick from all this working, huh?”
You decide now isn’t the time to bring up that you always work through every cold, flu, and fever you’ve ever had.
“Hey,” He leans down, catching your averted gaze. “Look at me.”
He could easily turn your head himself, his fingers still pressed against your jaw, but he doesn’t. He waits for you to muster up the strength to look over at him yourself, eyelashes fluttering.
His gaze is cool and deep when it meets yours. “I am not mad at you. I am not upset with you. I just want you to take care of yourself.”
His voice, gaining that low, rumbly edge when he ushers the words sends tingles up your spine. You sigh, letting the tension ease from your shoulders.
“I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to be.”
“I’ll try harder.”
“You’re doing just fine, okay?” He pulls you up by your hands, hand leaving your face as he tugs you over to your bed. Once you’ve sat down, he reaches back towards your desk, grabbing your water bottle from your desk and putting it on your bedside table. “You just need a little help sometimes. Everybody does.”
He motions for you to scoot over and you oblige, immediately slotting into what’s become one of your usual positions: arms wrapped around his torso, head pillowed on his chest.
“There we go,” He mumbles, hand sliding under your shirt, intermittently squeezing the place his hands always seem to find: the squishy, vulnerable stretch of flesh in between the top of your hip and the bottom of your ribcage. He rolls the skin there in his hands, a pleased hum rumbling from his chest. “Such a good girl for me.”
You shudder, hiding your blush by pressing your face further into his chest. A tingle spreads from your spine to the rest of your body.
He chuckles. “Aw, you like that don’t you? Did the same thing last time. Is that all I have to do? Is that what you need, baby?”
A small whine rip’s itself from your throat before you manage to tamp it down. Embarrassed, you try and hide your face further.
“None of that, now. Come on, let me see that pretty face.”
You shift, rolling to basically lie on top of him, bracing your hands on either side of him to lift your head, a small frown on your face and a not-so-small flush across your face.
He smiles, hands coming up to cup your cheeks. “There she is,” He practically coos, “My pretty baby.”
“You’re baby-talking me.”
“Mhm,” He says, squeezing your cheeks. “You got a problem with it?”
“…No.”
“What was that?”
You drop back down, wrapping your arms around his neck and resting your chin on his chest. “Shhh. I’m supposed to be resting.”
“Convenient that you’re listening to me now.”
“Shush.”
He grumbles, but doesn’t say anything more. He slips his hands under your shirt, palming the expanse of your skin. His fingers are hot where they press and linger, warmth spreading from the points of contact. You go limp in his hold, humming contentedly.
You’re not really sure how much time passes with the both of you like that— bodies pressed close, legs tangled together. It just feels so… nice.
You relax. You actually relax. A small part of you feels annoyed that Leon is your source of comfort and relaxation (muttered whispers in your brain whine about independence, about not relying on anyone else—) the bigger, louder part of you is so overwhelmed with how nice it feels to just… not worry. Even for a little bit. In moments like this your brain goes pleasantly blank: Leon will take care of it. You don’t have to worry, because Leon will take care of it.
The stretches of time you spend in what you’ve mentally dubbed Limbo have started getting longer. At first, you’d last five, maybe ten minutes before your brain would kick into high gear again; worries and concerns flooding your brain so quickly you usually jolt straight up.
But now? It’s easy to slip into it. To let yourself take a mental break. Check out from life for a half hour or so. And when you’re ready to get back to work, you do just that- usually a lot calmer than before Leon came around.
It’s addicting. It’s dangerous.
“How long has it been.”
“Five minutes.”
You blink your eyes open, frowning. “It has not been five minutes,” You reach for your bedside table, snatching your phone off and checking the time. “Liar. It’s been thirty minutes.”
“Is it so wrong to want to lay in bed and hold my princess?”
“It is when the princess has work to do.” You grumble, sitting off and rolling off the bed with a thud.
“It’s so unnerving when you do that. Doesn’t it hurt?”
“No,” You say, hauling yourself to your feet. “It’s fun.”
“I don’t see how sustaining bodily injury is fun.”
“You wouldn’t get it,” You say, waving a hand in dismissal.
Loud shuffling and the thump of Leon climbing to his feet has you looking back. “You’re leaving?”
You can’t quite keep the desperation out of your tone.
He looks at you, surprised. “Usually you don’t like it when I stay while you work.”
“Yes,” You say, cheeks burning. “Um. Yeah. Right yeah. I have work to do. So.”
“Princess,” He says, his voice low and teasing, “You want me to stay?”
“No, no I have to work—“
“Uh-uh,” He says, crossing the room to stand in front of you, arms folded. “No lying. Do you want me to stay?”
You look down at your sock-clad feet. “Please?”
“Aw, well how could I say no to that,” He leans down, pressing a quick kiss to the crown of your head. “Finish your work. I’ll be right here when you’re done.”
“…Can we go get slushies when I’m done?”
“Of course, baby.”
You finish your work in record time.
˙⋆✮
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