#It gave me a chance to ramble about my works a little more and bring in a little introspection for myself

[phynewrites]

🍓 Author Ask tag 🍓

Thank you for the tag! @leisoree (here) and @at-thezenith (here!) These are all wonderful questions and a perfect moment to share with others

This is a long post ahead so I'm going to put this here already:

Gently tagging (no pressure) @writingamongther0ses @distortedsense @alnaperera @sm-writes-chaos @bluet-s @silviathebard @caxycreations @inseasofgreen @sableglass

Your questions are:

Which OC are you most fond of and why?

Is there any form of media (other movies, books, theater, news, etc.) that inspired your wip/s? How so?

What wip-related activities do you do aside from writing your wip? (making moodboards or playlists, etc.)

What are you most proud of in your wip/s and why?

What tropes are common among your wip/s? Why do you enjoy incorporating these tropes?

Which part of your wip are you most struggling and how do you plan to overcome it?

Any advice/ words of encouragement or just really a greeting to any writeblr who would have read this far?

From @leisoree

What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it?

This is kind of tricky. Karikultura is essentially a satire/social commentary on the woes of my country as a former colony of Spain and America, as well as the neo-Imperialism that I learned during my years as an activist. I guess I wanted to impart my ideals there that we, as a nation, continue to operate in a colonial mindset by patronizing the foreign and especially putting attention on foreign needs instead of the welfare of our own people. We have not learned, that's essentially what I want to say

For In Death, Forever, at its core is just about how love endures everything, even the universe itself. But at the same time, there are things that are beyond our control no matter how we fight it for. Despite that, fate can be kind and it can work out in our favor even though the outcome is not something we want.

What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)?

I'm going to mention a wip that I think hinted at it before and that is Mantra (I think I remember talking about it with @yesireadbooks and @holdmyteaplease I don't know why I can't tag you HAHAHA), although I never got to fully flesh out the story I did go HARD! on the lore, which is mainly inspired by Hinduism and Philippine mythology. It has a polytheistic religion, each person has a specific deity they worship (except if you're a sage, you're mandated to have more than one deity to worship). The landscapes, I was not able to flesh out but I wanted to take inspiration in ancient India. It was also at that time that I was rereading the Ramayana and Mahabharata that I wanted to incorporate the same values of heroism, bravery, remaining true to ones vows, etc.

Karikultura isn't so deep in worldbuilding, but it's heavy on symbolism. Each character represents an idea that is personified. The main character, of course, represents our country. His friend represents our countrymen. His sister represents language. His mother represents glory. I guess that counts as worldbuilding?

In Death, Forever was supposed to be a simple time-leap story, until it just, like any other wip as you would know, expanded. I included, like in Mantra, a polytheistic system but they are not a form of religion. These gods, compared to the ones in Mantra, are not worshipped. They are considered personified forces in the universe that control various dimensions of human life. (Father Time, Sister Fates, Mother Death, I'm not sure if I'm gonna add someone else, maybe if I thought of it and if they play a relevant role in the story.) The time leap structure was based similarly on Tokyo Revengers, to which I still am an avid fan of today.

What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, help readers grow as a person?

Felipe in Karikultura appears to be a businessman who intends to expound his reach and conquer the world together with his American friends. As I've said, what I want to achieve in this story is neo-imperialism awareness through the decline of his character, that this is a faux success and the real success would rely on the prosperity of the people and not the foreigners.

Mary in In Death, Forever's goal is simple: find a way to stop the death of her husband Connor. Compared to Karikultura, there isn't really a deeper meaning in her journey apart from showing her resilient and determined nature despite her hardships, which in itself is, I think, a worthy message to the readers. It's going to a be a story about her grief, understanding the ways of the world, pushing its limits, and the raw power of the human mind against the universe and those that govern against it. In the process, she gains an unlikely ally.

How many chapters is your story going to have?

Well, I'm not really one to set a wordcount or number of chapters for my wips, but Karikultura is finished now! YEHEY! And I have finished editing it! It has Three Acts: Act 1 with 15 Scenes, Act 2 with 8 scenes and Act 3 with 6 scenes, a total of 19 scenes of 18,967 words (Kinda short but I think it's an ample size for a playscript)

In Death, Forever currently has 12 chapters with 9,519 words in, and that's not even halfway (or even a thirds) of the original plot I have in mind.

Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

Oh boy HAHAHHA, all my wips are original content. My top contenders of where I plan to post it are in Wattpad and A03. Actually, Karikultura is available in Public now, in Wattpad at https://www.wattpad.com/myworks/374982617-karikultura

It's in Filipino and English, a little bit of Spanish.

When and why did you start writing?

I formed the love for writing when I was in 3rd grade. The first book I read was Roald Dahl's The Magic Finger and I thought I wanted to write stories like that. I started to read more -- a hobby that I got from my mom -- and that's where I started concocting stories. I would write in notebooks about stories in schools and ideas that pop in my head. I started formally writing in high school, when I was 14 years old I think. It was a retelling of the Little Red Riding Hood except werewolves. I posted it on Wattpad then and it got good reads for a while, but I didn't get to update it frequently due to busy studies. I picked up on my writing slump when I was a college student again, a few moments before I made my writeblr account. Truly, the reason why I started writing was because I wanted to put my thoughts on paper and have an outlet for my emotions

Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers of Tumblr do you follow?

Keep being you. Don't lose sight of why you write in the first place, and that is for yourself, your leisure, your feelings, and your story. Don't be discouraged if there are challenges, these are normal. The way you handle and react to them is completely in your control, so keep going and always remember to write because it is what you love to do. It is not for anyone else to dictate to you. All the love <333333333333

From @at-thezenith

what was the first piece of writing you did where you thought "wow I'd love to be a writer"?

Okie, so I said a while ago that technically it was reading first that got me into writing, but I think the first piece that I wrote that really inspired me was a story I made about my friends in 5th grade. We were playing a royalty roleplay-esque game that my friend invented. I wrote about it in my diary, and then a flash of inspiration came into me that I could turn it into a fantasy story where each of us were queens from distant lands with different powers, each needing the other to balance the world. Kind of like that. I think that's the earliest wip I've had.

how do you gather inspiration for your works? (pinterest boards, writing prompts, etc)

The biggest inspiration for most of my wips just come into my head from either a (1) dream or (2) various media. I remember specifically having an abandoned about attending a magic school that was based on a dream, and then another about venturing into the depths of a volcano to retrieve an ancient artifact and then using lucid dreaming to travel to another dimension. (please don't ask me to revive these I literally don't know anything about them anymore, maybe in the future something might inspire me)

However, a good chunk of my serious works are from other stories, that's why one of my inspiration as a writer is also to instill inspiration to others (and that's how I also get inspiration from my lovely moots!)

For example, Karikultura is specifically a mishmash of Oscar Wilde's The Picture of Dorian Grey and Chinua Achebe's Things fall apart. The story is literally an adaptation of The Picture of Dorian Grey and at it's core is the message of Things fall apart.

In Death, Forever is an awful mishmash of Ken Wakui's Tokyo Revengers and Chinese series Link Click in regards to the time travelling logistics, Crisostomo and Maria Clara from the Television series Maria Clara and Ibarra as well as the extreme grief I felt from Demon Slayer: Mugen Train. I think even the atmosphere and the multiple universes of Sonny Boy also had an influence.

Another wip (unnamed but what I have in mind is "Berserker" or something like that) is based on Carnby Kim's Bastard Manhwa in regards to the atmosphere and the motivations of the main character. It also has elements of Venom such that the alien specie is like a symbiote but not really.

All these unrelated media mix together to create the shitshow I am brewing now.

what genre is easiest to write? what's the hardest? why?

For me, fantasy and science fiction is the easiest to write because of my exposure with the genre. With all the books and movies I have read and watched in this genre, I find it easy to pick apart how to make an effective story and create a world that is intricate according to this genre.

On the other hand, the hardest for me to write is Romance. Listen, sometimes love can be an overwhelming thing to write for me. I feel like I might be overdoing it or underdoing it. Do the characters have chemistry? Am I glamorizing a red flag? Do normal couples even do this? And it doesn't help that there are a lot of romance books that I have criticized a lot. That may be one of the reason I'm skeptical of my own writing when it comes to romance (which is kinda ironic considering In Death, Forever is also a romance story. Anyway, it's always good to go outside of our comfort zones once in a while)

what does a typical day of writing look like for you?

My job required me to write a lot of technical stuff so really, it's also a part of my daily life now (just not the type of writing I do to enjoy.)

When I'm writing for my wips, I want to remain focused and undisturbed as much as possible. If you would observe, I reblog some others writers' works here sometimes. That would mean I'm not in my headspace and want to get there, and most of the time I read stuff to get in the writing headspace. I also put on ambient music, mostly piano, to stay in that headspace. I have a notebook where the ideas are propped up and its sitting in a book stand next to my laptop. I have my favorite mechanical keyboard propped up, and a cup of cold coffee by the side. I really need the external orderliness to coordinate well with my headspace HAHAHA.

free space! ramble about a character you've most enjoyed writing about

Oh boy, this is actually from a short story that I posted here a long way back, it's a prompt fill that just sparked something in my brain and I knew I had to write it down, get it done. I don't care that I have a class in the next few hours, we still have time to get this shit.

Not just the characters, but I really love the worldbuilding I did here, especially since it was all in a whim but I'm really proud of it. I really like Luna and Skye's character. Actually there was another one that was supposed to appear which is a childhood friend of Skye. I think I have written her story somewhere, I just need to find and edit it before I get it out here. I wish I could expound more on their world, but there's nothing that coming out of my brain right now lol HAHAHA. I think what I most enjoyed writing about them is the spontaneity and how I was able to come up with their stories as fast as I could, on a deadline before my classes start.

I have a lot of babies, most of them are residing in my subconscious and I love them all.

if you could pick the brains of one author, who would you pick and why?

That would be Khaled Hosseini. I was deeply moved when I read The Kite Runner and it really made me feel... feelings. There's something in the way that Hosseini weaves words into not just a story but a prose. He was the first writer that I truly admired for the way he placed words together. I said that I want to have that kind of poetic way of writing and I would love to get into Mr. Hosseini's train of thought while writing so I could write like him and string the hearts of people like what he has done for me.

7. what's one writing tip that has stuck in your head?

Write for yourself. It's very simple but powerful because it reminds me why I'm doing this in the first place: because I love it. It gives me a chance to bring my stories to life, be productive, do something meaningful, and create. Also, I'm the kind of person who believes that the universe will give people what they need the moment they do. I might not be writing just for myself. There might be someone, somewhere out there who needs to read what I wrote just as how the countless works of other authors have found me. But for now, these stories will not be finished unless I do it for myself first.

[felixbit]

up all night

pairing: bang chan x gn!reader w. 3.9k genre: shameless smut summary: chan is in the studio working late, stressed about a deadline and pushed to his limit. you convince him to take his mind off work. warnings: reader has somewhat implied afab anatomy but no gendered terms/pronouns are used. petnames used: baby, love, honey a/n: making my smut debut with chan! written for the best person ever

As of late, Chan has been in the studio far more often than you'd like.

You knew he was a workaholic when you got into the relationship. He cared about his career, music, and group so much he'd push himself to the brink. He wrote, composed, and produced all of his own music and wouldn't have it any other way. If he wanted success, he needed to make it himself.

It came at a cost, though. You saw the way his mental health would deteriorate around the time of deadlines. He'd spend almost entire days in the studio, perfecting every last word and beat. You watched as he shaped this music from his hands, sculpting them to smooth out every edge and imperfection.

Even Chan was far too aware how bad it was for himself. You'd try to find ways for him to take breaks, always bringing him food and water to keep him going. He'd thank you in a million ways, with words and fond touches but it ended in him going back to work.

When he finally was home, he returned to the kind and gentle boyfriend you knew him to be. Holding you as you fell asleep and buying your order at the local coffee shop before you woke up. He'd make you breakfast in bed when he had the time, writing love notes whenever he had to leave before you woke up.

As it always happened, a new deadline was approaching. Chan often slipped out after schedules to the studio and worked himself down to the bone. You tried your hardest to spend as much time in there with him, even if it was just laying on the couch scrolling your feed. Every little thing helped.

That night, you'd ordered him some takeout but it was eaten long ago. The time on your phone showed it was half past three in the morning and Chan was at it in earnest. Headphones on, replaying samples and tweaking sounds.

You looked over from your phone when you heard him swear under his breath and take his headphones off. Chan let out a long sigh and covered his face with his hands for a moment before looking back down at his work.

"It- it just won't sound like I need it to. It's not right, it's.." Chan rambled into the air.

You got up from the couch and walked behind his chair, putting your hands on his broad shoulders and massaging them with your fingers. "I know, Channie. Is there anything I can do to help you right now?"

"No, I'm sorry," Chan let out a long sigh and smiled up at you weakly, "You being here is enough."

You felt a stirring in your stomach at the sentiment, but you wouldn't give up that easily. "I can't just let you suffer alone here. Do you want to take a break or wrap up for the night?"

"I won't remember how I want it tomorrow. If I give up on this now, there's a chance I never fix it and it goes out sounding wrong. I can't do that."

"Chris," You stopped massaging his shoulders to turn his chair around, looking down at him, "I know you want it perfect. Write it down on a sticky note what you want and take a break. It's gonna be four soon and I'm not letting you spend another all nighter here."

Chan looked up at you curiously before deflating back in his chair. "I mean- are you sure? If I forget, it's gonna be noticeable, and-"

"I'll remind you. I'll put it in my phone and tell you exactly what you need to fix. Here, tell me what it is and I'll write it down. Got it?"

Chan paused for a moment before nodding, allowing you to open your phone before speaking. He gave you the exact timestamps of the song and the strange producer jargon that you couldn't quite make sense of. You wrote it down word-for-word just as he needed it.

"There, it's in here for you later," You recited it back to him and he gave a confirmatory nod, "You're all set for tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? I can't be done for the night, there's too much to work on and not enough time. I'm sorry, just another hour. Please?"

You shook your head and set your phone down on the table before sliding into his lap, straddling him in the chair. "You're not working another second on those songs tonight, Chris."

Chan looked up at you a little stunned before a sly smirk crossed his face. "Baby, you know that's not fair to me. I need to work and you're doing something dangerously distracting."

"What are you going to do, then?" You replied back, unable to hold back a grin, "You gonna remove me from your lap to do some boring work instead?"

You could see Chan chew on the inside of his cheek before sighing. "It's not boring, and I really should get back to it.."

"Then you're going to have to remove me yourself, because I'm not moving."

Chan let out a dramatic sigh before his hands moved up the outside of your thighs, resting right next to your hips. "You know damn well I'm not going to do that."

"And why's that, Channie?"

His hands moved over your thighs, giving a light squeeze. "God, you're driving me insane. Coming into the studio every night and making yourself useful at every opportunity.. I wanted so bad to stop just to make you feel good. You deserve that, instead of me working the whole day."

"Your opportunity has finally come, I'm all yours if you want me right now."

Chan chuckled, "You could ask me that a thousand times and I could never say no."

You leaned in to his ear and whispered, "Then make your move."

There was a moment of silence before Chan pulled you in for a kiss, messy and rushed. His hands were all over your thighs, waist, back. He couldn't pick a spot and stick to it, deciding instead everywhere needed to be felt over.

You tried to keep things centered, your arms wrapped around the back of his neck. One of your hands played with the curls growing on the back of his head, enjoying the soft feeling through your fingers. It was the only thing keeping you sane.

His hands finally found a place to reside when he hooked them on the hem of your pants, giving light tugs as you felt him squirming under you. Pulling away from the kiss with a grin, you looked down at Chan and his flushed appearance. "So eager.."

"Can you blame me? Now stand up and help me get those off," Chan demanded with a rushed voice, helping get you to your feet as he followed in your footsteps. His usually deft hands were fumbling as he desperately pulled your pants off of you and discarded them to the floor.

Watching him undo his own sweatpants like a madman had you giggling at the sight. "You go one week without any action, and this is how desperate you get?"

"I'm a starved man, honey," Chan's face was red and already had sweat on his brow, "I can't wait any longer, not after all that teasing."

"Teasing? What-"

"Get on the damn couch."

That much was enough to have you laying down on the couch without hesitating. His sweatpants joined yours on the floor, showing off the black boxers he was sporting underneath. A quick glance showed he was pitching an obvious tent.

Although as quick as you were, Chan caught you looking. He raised his brows and laughed, "And I'm the eager one here?"

"You are the eager one here, hardly put your hands on me and you're giving those boxers a run for their money," You responded with your own laugh.

"You little.." Chan shook his head and leaned over you, putting his weight on one forearm on the couch as he kissed you once more. Instead of the fast and desperate pace he had set before, Chan was far slower and delicate. It was almost infuriatingly slow.

You couldn't show how much you wanted him to go faster, that would only prove his point. Instead, he was slowly breaking you down by the second, one arm stabilizing himself and the other hand on your neck, softly stroking your jaw with his thumb.

The waiting game paid off when Chan suddenly took your bottom lip between his teeth, giving it a small tug before he pulled away. "I can't keep this up. You win. Damn you, I'm eager."

There wasn't time for any words to respond before Chan was back where he was before, sloppy and fast. He kissed down your neck, excessive in his biting and sucking at the sensitive skin. Not expecting it, a sound broke its way out of you.

You did your best not to give in to the rest of his harsh and aggressive kisses down your neck. After a week of downtime, he was making up for it in marking your neck as his own. Nobody was going to know who the perpetrator of the hickeys were later (other than the upset staff), but it was the idea that mattered.

There were bigger problems actively stealing your attention. Namely, the small amount of friction made with him moving ever-so-slightly between your legs. It was easy to ignore at first, but the neck kisses were causing the pleasure parts of your brain to kick into high gear.

With one harsher movement than the rest, you were unable to bite back a small, unfiltered sound that escaped you. Chan broke contact with your red and bruising skin to look up with a grin on his face.

"What was that, love?" Chan's tone was starkly different than before, far more teasing and with a dark edge to his voice that you only recognized coming out in bed.

Attempts to take his attention off of it failed and you were forced to fess up in the moment. "You have to stop moving like that, it's driving me crazy."

"Moving like what?" Chan shifted his legs, slotting his thigh directly between yours and pressing firmly against you. This elicited a frustrated sigh, the feeling too strong to push away.

Upon no immediate response, Chan pushed his thigh forward and forced a fuller, more in-tact moan out of you. "Fine, fine- that. Putting your thigh between my legs. That's the thing that's driving me crazy."

"There you go," Chan's words were sickly doting in a way that made you break at the seams, "What do you want instead?"

With his thigh slotted firmly between your own, finding coherent strings of words was difficult. "Just.. get this underwear off me and use your fingers instead."

Chan smiled, clearly pleased with your answer. He moved his leg out from between yours, relieving the pressure and allowing you to breathe. He sat back on his legs as he removed the last layer of clothing from below your waist, tossing it to the growing pile on the floor.

He nudged himself closer, Chan's hand finding its way to where his thigh was once situated before. His middle finger teased you with a circular motion around your entrance, so close to where you needed it most.

"Chan." You demanded, shooting him a glare.

"Okay, okay. Just admiring how worked up I've got you," Chan smirked before his finger pushed inside, slowly filling you up and drawing out a long sigh. He worked slowly yet decisively, knowing exactly how you like it.

That was one of the things you loved about Chan: he knew your body like the back of his hand. Where you were most sensitive, what drove you wild, how rough you liked him to get. He could push your buttons perfectly, string you up in his words until you were tied up into a nice present for him.

Before you could process the first, Chan had already added a second finger and was growing more confident. He worked his fingers in and out in a steady rhythm, not slow enough to leave you wanting more nor fast enough to want to slow down.

"That good, baby?" Chan's eyes met yours, and you saw a different side of him for a moment. The way he sought your approval and made sure everything was right had your heart melting. He had confidence in his abilities, but occasionally needed reassurance.

You nodded eagerly, on the cusp of desperation. "It's good, Channie, you're doing so good," You said between soft moans as his fingers pumped deep, feeling him tease a third and giving him a nod.

The third was always a stretch that had you biting back whines in conjunction to moans, but the feeling was too good to beat. The feeling of being full, on his fingers or otherwise, was what drove you wild.

He kissed you once more, slow and tender as his fingers continued to work. It was hard to keep properly connected, devolving into moaning against his lips with small kisses in between.

"Chris," You said, "Can't wait any longer. Need to have you inside, baby."

Instead of his usual entourage of teasing questions, Chan nodded. He made quick work of his boxers, tossing them haphazardly towards the pile as he moved back to you. He was painfully hard, already leaky and worked up.

"Can I?" He looked down for your reassurance, which came with a nod as he lined himself up. His hips moved forward slowly, feeling him filling you up more by the second. It always took a second to adjust to the size, catching your breath as he bottomed out and waited for your signal.

When you gave him the go-ahead, Chan couldn't help but begin a slow and steady pace. He knew better than to go fast right off the bat- he was a lot to handle. But you could hear him whining softly over top of you and knew he was desperate.

Looking up at him, you cupped his face and pulled him in for a quick kiss. "You can go faster, Chris. You won't hurt me."

You heard Chan let out a breathy laugh before his thrusts grew harsher. Instead of the slow, fluid motion of before; he was faster, precise. Every movement had purpose, each angled just right and hitting the sweet spot.

The sudden adjustment had you whining and letting out louder moans, unable to properly cope. It was overwhelming how good he was at it. All you could do was wrap your hands around the back of his shirt and claw at it helplessly as he had his way.

The fabric getting in the way of your fingers on his skin was beginning to frustrate you. "Off," You managed to get out, "Shirt- off."

Chan grinned, sitting up for a moment and slowing down to a snail's pace to pull his black t-shirt over his head and discard it. You reached up, dragging a hand down his chest and over his abs. Every muscle was yours to touch, to claim.

"You like what you see?" Chan said with a laugh.

Deadpanning, you shook your head. "Shut up."

In a second, he was back over top of you and his pace was back with a new force he didn't have before. It was often he was without clothes, but you weren't under the impression a shirt would be the thing holding him back. Either way, you relished in the fact his back was open to you.

Your nails dug in to his tanned skin, dragging along as he fucked into you steadily. You could hear him sucking air in between his teeth followed by his soft moans. He was always one to endure a little pain.

An idea popped into your head when you thought of before, sitting in the chair in his lap. "Chris, stop for a sec." He immediately halted all movements, looking down at you to make sure everything was alright. "Sit normally, facing the booth."

Chan looked at you perplexed for a moment, but pulled away. He did exactly as you told him to, sitting with his legs spread facing the booth he was just sitting in front of not twenty minutes ago. "What are you planning?" He asked.

You sat up and climbed over to him, straddling his waist with your legs and feeling him hard underneath you. "What I wanted to do to you when I was in your lap earlier."

The realization slowly filled his eyes and a knowing smile returned to his face as he sat back, leaning against the black couch cushion behind him. "Go right ahead."

"If you make me do all the work, we're going to have problems," You glared at him as your hand guided his cock, slowly sinking down on it with a sigh.

Chan's large hands wrapped around your waist, slowly guiding you as you moved up and down. Riding wasn't always the easiest job, and it definitely took some getting used to at the start. Your thighs were slowly building up muscle from the practice.

"God, you're so pretty like that," Chan's voice pulled you from your thoughts, looking down at him to see him smiling up at you. His face was pink and he almost had stars in his eyes.

Seeing just how infatuated he was made your heart race and your face flush, almost forgetting to continue to move. "You're pretty, too."

Your hands were situated on his shoulders to keep steady, but one dragged down and you couldn't resist feeling up his chest a bit. Chan looked up at you smirking again. "Do you ever keep your hands off those?"

Snickering, you pushed down a little harder to see him whine and catch his breath before you responded, "If you're going to keep your clothes off all the time, I'm going to feel up the assets you work so hard on."

"Why do you insist on teasing me all the time? You know what happens when you do that," Chan had a dark look in his eyes that you knew far too well.

Shrugging, you moved your hand up to run through his hair. "Did you ever consider I might like what happens when I tease you?"

"So be it."

Without hesitation, you felt Chan's grip around your waist suddenly tighten. You leaned forward instinctively, both of your hands secured around his shoulders.

He began to thrust up into erratically, fast and without caution or precision. The sound of your skin connecting was obscene, thanking the amount of soundproofing around you as a chorus of moans spilled out of you. Every movement had him deep inside you as you attempted to roll your hips along with him.

"Fuck, Chris," You whined, his pace unrelenting and seeming like he wasn't going to let up any time soon, "Close."

There was a distinctive feeling growing, one you knew too well. The amount of pleasure from every movement was rapidly growing as your body was being overwhelmed. Chan heard you, but didn't stop for a moment. It was almost if it was a sign for him to fuck you faster.

Either way, you were tipping over the edge before you had time to process it, spasming around him as you let you a whorish moan. He slowed down, letting you ride out the high. "That's it, baby," He coaxed, "You got it."

Just as you settled down, you felt him start to work himself into a moderate pace again. Your legs felt shot from your energy levels dipping so you asked, "Do you want to me to move, baby? I don't think I have much in me to keep going right here."

"If it's not comfortable to be right there, of course we can move," Chan said with a smile as he allowed you to reposition to pretty much the same spot you were in before. You laid on your back, Chan coming back over top of you. "That better?"

"Much better," You said with a nod as he went back to the pace he had set before. It wasn't as rough as before your orgasm, but steady enough to keep you whining and your brain somewhat fogged up from the constant pleasure.

Meanwhile, you could see Chan was already getting worked up. His face was redder than usual, his eyes trained on one spot, breathing hard as he kept the effort going to thrust his hips in one continuous pace.

His deep groans and whines had begun to turn into full-fledged moans and swears under his breath. His hands eagerly gripped and kneaded at your waist, seeming like he might accidentally bruise the skin. You were about to open your mouth when he said something.

"Honey, I-" Chan was cut off by his own faltered moan, "I'm close, so fucking close."

You pulled him down to kiss him briefly, keeping his face inches from yours as he continued to erratically thrust. "You don't have to wait, cum for me."

Chan nodded vigorously, his hips snapping back and forth at a speed that had you holding onto the couch for dear life, hearing him let out strained moans and teary-eyed cries as he climbed closer and closer to the top.

All of the sudden, he pushed deep inside you, letting out a gasp and a whine as you felt him come deep inside. His hips stuttered as he slowly rocked them, riding out the high. "Oh my god, that.. that was amazing."

Allowing him a moment to catch his breath, you smiled up at him and gave him another quick kiss. "I've missed you, Chris. I've missed this," You admitted after another silent pause.

Chan nodded, pressing his forehead against yours and sighed. He had finally mellowed out, still buried deep. "I've missed you, too. I'm sorry I haven't been able to do this with you and.. be a good boyfriend."

"No, you're okay. I know how much work matters to you and getting things right means that you see that success you've always wanted. I just always miss you in the times you're working, even if I'm in the same room as you."

"I just feel bad when you're here til way too late at night. Speaking of, what time is it?" Chan slowly pulled out, leaving his mess inside you as he quickly grabbed his phone from the floor, "Oh my god. It's half past four."

Your jaw dropped, standing up quickly as Chan hurried around the room to find something to help you clean up. He settled for his own black t-shirt, telling you he'd just go home shirtless if he had to. Of course it looked terribly stained when you had wiped yourself down, sighing while knowing it probably cost a crazy amount.

Digging through a closet, you found one of Chan's old jacket. Chan was standing shirtless and pacing with the rest of his own clothes on, the defiled shirt balled up in his hand.

"Channie, guess what I found?" You asked with a grin, hiding the jacket behind your back.

Chan looked at you with a nervous smile. "Is it something good? I'm just not super stoked to walk home shirtless at four in the morning.."

You tossed the jacket to him, Chan opting to drop the shirt in his hand before he caught it to not get the filth on it. He happily slid it over his shoulders and zipped it up all the way, picking up the soiled shirt once more.

"Shall we go?" Chan said as he double-checked his pockets and walked towards the studio door.

"We shall."

[lilgarbitch]

The Voice of an Angel - Three

Pairing: Matt Dierkes x Pornblog!Reader

CW: phone sex, mutual masterbation, i think that’s it.

Word Count: 6.3k

Author’s Note: Here you are, my little gremlins! I know very little about microphones and technology and shit so just ignore the details😭 I know most is probably wrong. I did the best research I could but it’s not gonna he perfect.

Tags: @theanarchymuse95 @dontwantthemoney @badomensgoodomens @enemiestolovershoe @xmads-omensx @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @thatchickwiththecamera @tosoundlessdarkistare @lacy1986 @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @heyyoplayer

Part Two

Y/N | Thursday 4:56 PM

ThotxPleaser has officially gone from occasional donator and supporter to full sugar daddy and I didn’t know how to handle it. The past two weeks have just been me sending him voice notes talking about my day and responding to his messages while he just replies by text when he gets the chance, and then sending me money for absolutely anything that I talk about, to the point that I’ve started backtracking during some conversations and telling him that he in fact did not have to send me money for breakfast every morning because I mentioned that I forgot to eat it a few days ago. 

I even had to tell him that he could slow down on the payments. He’s been sending at least $300-$500 each time I sent him a voice note, more if he specifies on what to spend it on. I’m making more money than I ever have before, especially because I’m still getting donations from other supporters. But of course, he responds by telling me that I deserve to be ‘rewarded for my gift’ as if just rambling to someone while occasionally posting lewd audios was a gift to the world. 

I was currently on my way to work, taking the long route, since I managed to wake up with enough time to take in the scene of the city, and because I was really enjoying being able to just use these voice notes as some sort of diary. I mean, I’m never going to meet this guy, and it’s not like he’s going to use the things I talk about against me, especially when most of the time it’s just me trying to figure out what my dreams meant, or debating on upgrading my setup. He’s been surprisingly helpful with that though. My setup…not my dreams. He’s been giving me tips on recording equipment, even going into detail on why each piece works best for what I do. He even gave me multiple options of things like microphones and hard drives for me to store my old audios to save up space and in case something happens and I lose all my old media. 

I was surprised he didn’t just tell me what to buy and give me the money for it, but I think after mentioning so many times that I really don’t need to be spoiled this bad, and because it’s not like I’m doing anything truly professional, that he’s been giving me cheaper options that are still good quality. It was shocking to me when he first started talking about it. Not like I know absolutely anything about him or what he does, but the knowledge he has for all of this is insane. He’s been talking about things that sound like complete gibberish to me, having to bring out what I’ve been calling ‘baby talk’, explaining what solid state drives or form factors are to me, because let's be honest, when it comes to anything more than ‘press play’ ‘ transfer file’ and ‘post’, I’m a complete amateur. But I am very thankful he hasn’t treated me like I was stupid for not knowing all of this, just putting it into simpler terms so I can understand what to look for and why it’ll help me. 

“I’m trying to decide on the best microphone to buy, because I don’t want anything too bulky or heavy, but I also don’t want to buy some cheap piece of garbage and waste money,” I speak into my phone as I spin the steering wheel, turning down a side street with gorgeous blossoming trees lining the sides, “Is there, like, a stand or something I should get? I feel like…where…I record… is a little too unconventional and it’s hard to figure out how I can even get this to work. Using my phone is so easy because I can just sit it beside me and…do my thing. Also having to have it connected to my computer will be a bitch, so should I get a bluetooth one? Are those still good quality?” 

I continue rambling about every thought in my head as I get closer to work, probably relying on his input a little too much because I never really thought this far ahead about my whole side hustle until now and he has coincidentally become the perfect person to help, being the only person who could give me the advice I need while also being the only one I could think of even sending test audios to while working on upgrading. 

“I think I’m in a little over my head with all of this,” I say as I pull into the parking lot of the library, “You think- Fuck. Okay, maybe that’s a bad idea… I mean…Fuck it. What would you think of, like…calling? To help me set up everything? You can totally say ‘no’ if you don’t feel comfortable, and I can tell you’ve been pretty busy so if you don’t have time, that’s completely okay, too. I’m just gonna need some tips and to probably send you a few audio tests so you can tell me if everything sounds okay- Alright I’m rambling and I’m at work so, like…I guess just let me know…? Okay bye.” 

I end the recording and work on sending it over to our chat as I make my way into the library. Why was my heart racing? I understand that I just asked a stranger to talk on the phone with me but it’s not like I haven’t been communicating with him for a while now. And it’s just a phone call, especially if we can set this up over some app so he doesn’t actually get my phone number, what harm will this do? Am I just scared that I may have made him uncomfortable, or is it a mix of fear and excitement of hearing him after months of him only knowing my voice? 

I shake my head and push all the racing thoughts out of it. I’ll deal with this when I get a response from him, but right now, I need to do my real job. 

Matt | Thursday 12:27 AM

I let out a huff as I fall into the seat of the bus. My body is slowly getting used to being on the road, but it’s still exhausting. Helping set up for hours before the show, helping take down for an hour after, and being completely focused during took a toll on my mind and body. The only thing keeping me going was energy drinks, being able to do all of this with the group I consider my family, and those goddamn voice notes. 

Once everyone packed into the buses and vans, we started making our way to the next location. As the bus hit the road, I got comfortable in my seat and pulled out my phone. I know I should start moving to my bunk when we get on, especially after the countless nights I end up passing out in the front, but despite the exhaustion, I’m too wired from the energy of the day and end up restless if I head to bed right away. 

I pull out my airpods from my bag and just scroll through Twitter and Instagram for a bit. Most nights, I’ve been putting off listening to the voice notes until I can get a little more relaxed, especially because listening to her voice somehow manages to calm me and bring my heart rate up at the same time. It kind of drives me insane the effect she has on me. All she does is tell me about her day, complain about work or something she saw online, or now that we talked more about upgrading her setup, she’s been asking me a lot of questions about everything. And I couldn’t be more willing to help. Between being able to share my knowledge with someone, and feel the appreciation she has when I do give her advice, I couldn’t be enjoying this little thing we have going on more. 

After scrolling for long enough, I was feeling antsy, needing to hear her voice, so I finally switched over to my other Twitter account and opened the DMs, my heart already racing. I hit play, adjusted my volume, and closed my eyes as I let her ramble into my ears. 

She seemed to be getting more stressed about the whole set up situation now that she was dead set on upgrading, so that was mainly what she talked about. When she started talking about how she’d even get it to work with her recording arrangements, I was starting to think of how to reply to ease her stress and give her the best advice to make sure this worked best for her. When I knew the audio was coming close to an end, I looked at my phone again and began typing the beginning of my reply. But then she asked something I wasn’t ever expecting. 

“What would you think of calling? To help me set up everything?” 

She wanted to call? So many thoughts were racing through my mind. The audio ended and I was staring at the first few words I wrote in the text box as my brain flooded with how to respond. She actually wanted to hear me, too? I mean, we have created some sort of friendship over the past two weeks, especially with how normal our conversations were compared to the ways I’d talk through comments and donations. We’ve definitely reached a point past Creator and Follower, but she was willing to talk on the phone with me? 

Also how the fuck would this work? I’d never let her give me her phone number, and would honestly be upset if she even wanted to give it to me after only speaking for two weeks, not having a clue who I actually was. I guess we could figure something out like a Discord call, that way both of our identities were still hidden. Fuck. Identities. I mean, what are the odds she even listens to Bad Omens? And if she did, the possibility of knowing who I was was even slimmer. But that didn’t mean I was exactly a nobody. And it’s not like my voice was everywhere like Noah’s or even Davis’, but it was still out there. 

I’m overthinking this way too much. There’s no way she knows who I am or would recognize my voice. This will be fine. As long as I don’t give her any information about what I do for work or who I work with, it’ll be okay. But when the fuck would I even have time to call her? My schedule is packed and when I’m not setting up or taking down sets, I’m stuck on this bus with nosy ass people who will either be sleeping or in my business. I thought about it for a moment before remembering that we’re supposed to be staying at a hotel Sunday night since we won’t have a show until Tuesday. I’ll just book a one bedroom. I quickly deleted what I had typed and rewrote my message. 

I’d love to help if that’s what works for you. My schedule is pretty packed but if Sunday night works for you, we could set something up. I feel like our best bet would be talking over Discord, if that’s alright with you. That way we can test the mic through your computer while on call. Just let me know, if not, we can figure out another day. 

I then list off a few mics she could get, a few cheap ones I know were good quality, some bluetooth, and one I knew Noah really liked for his at home studio. I hit send and dropped my phone on my chest, staring up at the ceiling of the bus as my heart continued to pound in my chest. It shouldn’t be such a big deal, but this call feels like a big step, both good and bad. 

Y/N | Friday 2:30 PM

Either he was really tired, since it was nearly 2 in the morning here when I got a reply, or I may have freaked him out with the whole call situation, because he forgot to send me anything last night. Not that I cared, he was sending me more than I knew what to do with, but it was weird waking up to a notification from just my DMs and not CashApp, too. 

He still agreed to talk, which I was happy about, so I must’ve not freaked him out too bad. I was now on my way to Guitar Center to look at their selections of mics there, since I knew if I ordered one online, it wouldn’t get here in time for our call, and it’ll be easier to return it if I have to. And this was more of a fun store to look through than Best Buy. 

When I step through the door, I greet the guy at the front and begin looking around. I know I’m here for microphones, but come on, it’s like a museum in here. I have to window shop every instrument I’ll never know how to play. 

After I take my time walking around the store, eyeing up all the guitars, drum sets, and even the dj boards, I finally make my way to the back with the wall full of mics. And then I just stare, because suddenly I completely forgot everything we were talking about and every brand name and all the information now looked like gibberish to me. 

I take a closer look at most of them, trying to remember what he told me, but I swear nothing any of this said was anything I was mentioned to look for. If only I knew he’d respond if I texted him asking for help. There’s so many random numbers and letters and the prices are all over the place, I couldn’t stop myself from trying. I open my phone and pull up our chat before begging for help. 

I’m currently looking at a giant wall of microphones and I feel like I stepped onto another planet

Why the fuck are some of these in the thousands?

Do I need a condenser mic? These look like those goddamn podcast mics

I’m about to continue spamming him when, surprisingly, a message comes through. 

Remain calm😂 You don’t need anything more than a few hundred, if even that. Yes, I’d recommend a condenser mic because you’re gonna want something that won’t pick up too much background noise, some even have controls on them for boost, gain, and volume

I stare up at the wall and then back at my phone before just saying ‘fuck it’ and pressing the record button on the side of the text box since this it’s just gonna be a short audio. 

“What the fuck is boost, gain, and vol- okay I know what volume means. But I swear all the information you gave me just went out the window.” I said before letting it send. It took a minute but then he finally responded. 

Boost is pretty much how much background noise your mic picks up. Gain is just the input signal level. Like how loud your voice will get picked up. 

I once again just stare at his messages like they made any sense to me. I was starting to get a little frustrated. I know he doesn’t seem busy right now, but I can’t just ask him to call already, knowing he said to wait until Sunday, so I did the next best thing. I close out of Twitter and open my camera app. I make sure it’s facing away and I’m not being picked up on any reflections before pressing record. 

“Okay, so,” I say as I get closer to whatever the fuck condenser microphones are, “These are the ones you said I should be looking at. I’m steering clear of these ones that look like they belong on Joe Rogan’s podcast or any over 400 dollars. So that leaves me with these,” I bring my hand into view and point out the ones I assume I should be looking at. 

“I hear a lot about this one, but this one looks like it’ll work better with how I record. But then wasn’t this one the one you told me about last night? God, I can’t remember. What do I do?” I end the video and send it to him. 

After watching the video, he finally responds, surprising me with a voice note of his own. 

“Alright. The first one is a Blue Yeti, it does fit perfectly with what you’re doing, but I have heard a lot of mixed reviews, and I haven’t personally used it myself, so I can’t say I recommend it. The second is a Shure MV7X. It’s definitely what you would want, but most controls will have to be done while it’s hooked up to your computer, if that works for you. The last is the one I recommended because that’s the one a friend of mine uses. It’s the Shure SM7B. It’s pricier than the rest and is set up in a way that may be harder for you to use, but it’s one I do think you should get if you can figure out a way to set it up to work for you.”

I listen to his voice with my phone held up to my ear, not wanting to bother other customers with my idiocy and I could tell he was somewhere with people around so it was a little harder to hear. But I barely process what he’s saying, stuck on the fact I’m hearing his voice for the first time. I have no idea what I thought he’d sound like, but I will say I’m kind of shocked he didn’t sound like an old man. And a part of me felt like his voice sounded familiar but I immediately pushed that thought out of my mind, not wanting to think about the fact that this could be someone I know. 

I replay the audio as I look at the options in front of me, before deciding that I’m just going to buy both the Blue Yeti and the last one he mentioned. I can always bring back whichever I don’t use. I send him a quick thank you text before grabbing both boxes and making my way to the front. I chat with the guy ringing me up, making sure I know their return policy, before finally heading back to my car. 

On my walk, I feel my phone buzz in my pocket, so I pull it out once I’m in my seat, seeing that it’s that goddamn CashApp notification. 

ThotxPleaser - $700

Because I forgot and to help out with whichever you chose

I rolled my eyes with a smile as I toss the boxes onto the passenger seat and start my car. I swear if that fucker pays me for helping me set these up, I may have to block him on CashApp.

Matt | Sunday 10:17 PM

I managed to get them to let me head back to the hotel early. I felt terrible leaving them to take everything down by themselves, but losing one person wasn’t the end of the world, and I already felt terrible making Angel wait this long. I had no clue what time zone she was in, but it was pretty late no matter where she was. 

I took a quick shower because I felt disgusting from sweating all day and made sure everything in the hotel room was set up because depending on what time it was for her, I didn’t know how long our call was going to run and I didn’t want to have to get ready for bed if I was dead tired by the end of it. 

Once I had my chargers plugged in, my dirty clothes packed up, and the TV playing some quiet music in the background, I finally pulled out my phone and got prepared to send her the text that I was home and free to call.

All day I feel like I’ve been looking forward to this call, the anxiety and excitement of it all almost distracting me the whole day. Thankfully, I pushed her out of my head while I was actually working the sound and making sure everything in Front of House was running smoothly during the show, but every moment before and after was me just dizzy as she consumed my thoughts. 

Checking the time one last time, I realized I shouldn’t wait any longer, so I sent her the text that she could call when she was ready. 

Y/N | Sunday 11:34 PM

I was fucking rushing around my room once I got his text. I had no idea why I was freaking out so bad. I was the one who asked if we could call and it wasn’t like he was going to see me or my room but for some reason I was making my bed and making sure I didn’t look like a mess as my computer was booting up and I made sure Discord was open and logged into. I had to make a new account since my old one had my personal username and information so it was weird seeing such a blank account, but I spent all of this morning making sure my profile looked cute for absolutely no reason other than needing to distract me from my nerves and excitement. 

I realize that he’s going to have to help me set up my mics, so I was probably going to have to start the call on my phone anyway so I didn’t fuck anything up and he couldn’t hear me. I shoot him a quick text, telling him to give me a minute and sending him my username, the one I’ve been using for all these pseudo accounts. 

I feel my phone buzz as I grab the two boxes I bought the other day and set them on my desk. I open my notifications to see that he had friended me on Discord, so I did the same back. Calm the fuck down, Y/N. You’re just getting help setting everything up. It’s not like you’re putting on a show for him or like this was the first time you were speaking to him. Just hit call. Just press the button. Okay. Deep breaths. You don’t need a shaky voice when he’s already been hearing it for months. 

I take one last exhale as I hit the little phone icon. My heart’s trying to pound out of my chest as I hear it ring, and my stomach feels like it wants to drop when he finally answers. But then, I hear that voice I first heard a few days ago and it’s almost like my nerves all instantly vanished. 

“Hey!” I hear through my phone’s speaker. The too familiar voice filling my ears and bringing a smile to my face without me even understanding why. 

“Hey,” I replied, my smile evident in my voice, causing a small chuckle to come from my phone. 

“Sorry it’s so late. I uh…” He paused to let out a small laugh, “I actually got out of work earlier than normal, but it was still pretty late by the time I got back. I hope it’s not too late for you.”

”No, no. It’s all good. It’s still before midnight here and I was probably gonna stay up late anyway since I don’t work tomorrow.” 

“Alright, good. I’m technically off, too, so I’m glad this worked out for both of us.” 

God, there was something about his voice. It’s like my brain was overworking, trying to connect a face to it, but it couldn’t quite make it fit. But it was so familiar. It definitely wasn’t anyone I knew personally, so that’s good. But now I’m just confused on why I felt like I knew him already. 

“So what mic did you end up getting?” He asked, pulling me out of my thoughts. 

“Oh yeah!” I moved and sat down in my computer chair, setting my phone on my desk and pulling the boxes towards me, “I grabbed the Blue Yeti and the one you said your friend used. I figured I could just take back the one that I didn’t need and it’d be easier to do it this way than run back and forth from the store or get stuck with one I didn’t like.” 

“Smart. The Blue Yeti should be pretty simple to figure out, but I can help you set up the Shure and figure out the settings and everything on your computer.” 

I took the Blue Yeti out of the box first and made sure I didn’t ruin any of its packaging just in case this was the one I needed to return. I set it on my desk and read over the instructions. It was pretty easy to set up, just needing to plug it in and fuck around with the gain and sound source. After understanding what I could from the instructions, I told him that I was going to switch over to my computer so he could tell me how it sounded. 

“Hello?” I spoke into the mic after he answered the call. 

“Holy shit, that picks up a lot of input,” he answered, laughing. I giggled before covering my mouth, realizing just how loud that probably was on his end. 

“I’m gonna fuck around with the settings and shit and you tell me what sounds good,” I said before leaning back and looking at the dails on the mic. 

I did a few test “Hello”s, trying to figure out the best sound source option. 

“Oh, that one’s good. It’s more binaural so when you move around the mic, it almost sounds 3D.” 

“So it'd be good for what I’m gonna use it for?” He softly laughed.

”Yes. And for someone who says some lewd things online, I find it so funny that you won’t just say ‘for my audios’ or something. You act like that’s not how I know you.” I groaned and immediately dropped my face to my hands as he called me out, almost like I was hiding the blush he couldn’t even see anyway.

”I know. I’m sorry. It’s still just really awkward actually talking to someone about it, you know? Like, not even my best friend knows I do this, so you’re the first person I’m actually talking to about it.”

”Well, I’m honored. And I get it, I’m just teasing. It’s just cute that I’ve heard some insane noises from you yet you won’t even admit out loud what you do.” I fall back in my chair and laugh, still covering my face. 

“Alright, shut up.”

“Okay. Okay. Sorry,” he said, chuckling, “Now that we know what this one sounds like, let’s figure out how to get the other mic working for you.” 

I took the other mic and cords out of the box while the Blue Yeti was hooked up as I asked him more questions since it was a little more complicated, and once I had it set up, I quickly switched the plugs. 

“Hello?” I spoke into the new mic.

”Woah. You can definitely tell the difference. Are there instructions on how to pull up the controls?” I look over at the paper that came in the box and grab it again.

”Good god, this is so complicated,” I mumble to myself as I read over the instructions that come after simply setting it up.

Matt | Sunday 11:23 PM

This was my own personal hell. Okay, maybe not hell, but it was a fucking struggle. Having her talk to me. Hearing her voice replying to everything I said. How she asked me the simplest questions and truly appreciated my answers and how cute she sounded when it started working easier or she started understanding what each control meant. I’m thankful my brain was working enough to remember at least the important knowledge on how to help her set everything up because it felt like it was melting out of my ears with every little noise her new mics picked up, every giggle she let out or the small little huffs of frustration that just sent me back to the sounds I heard on her audios for months. 

“Alright, I think we managed to get it to the perfect controls…What’s a windscreen?” she oh so adorably asked.

”The uhh little foam thing that looks like it fits over the mic.”

”Oh!” I hear some shuffling and then the sound of foam sliding over metal, “What does this do?”

”Well, it pretty much does what the name says. It’ll block out most air sounds, but it also muffles some sounds most people don’t want picked up, like absent mouth sounds or strong ‘S’ or ‘P’ sound.” I answer.

”Should I use it?” God, she was adorable. It’s like she wasn’t even thinking of an answer on her own, she just knew I had the knowledge and wanted to help so I’d give her anything she needed. And I would. And love every second of it. 

“No, darling. You want those noises picked up, right? I mean, ‘wet sounds’ more than mouth sounds.” I answered, chuckling. 

”Wet- Oh! Oh. Yeah, that makes more sense,” she replied, almost sounding bashful. 

The way she seemed so nervous talking about this out loud was both shocking and cute at the same time. I knew she was in the space she had made some pretty noisy audios in the past, so it wasn’t like she was scared someone else would hear her talk about it. It was just that she was talking to me about it. 

Suddenly, I hear something small crash on the other side of the phone, causing her to sigh. I assume something just fell off her desk, but she let out a slight groan as she reached down to grab it, whispering an ‘Aww fuck,” before she seemingly reached it and picked it up, and instantly, my dick went from the semi erect it’s been at since I heard her answer the call, to fully hard. I play off the groan escaping my throat with a cough. 

“You alright?” I managed to get out.

”Yeah, sorry, knocked my phone off the desk. Thankfully it didn’t crack,” she said with a soft sigh. I cleared my throat and shifted in the bed, my erection getting more and more uncomfortable with each word she said. 

“That’s good.” 

Y/N | Monday 12:47 AM

Something sounded different about him all of a sudden. He went from helpfully nerding out over each of the controls and what the perfect settings for me would be, to distracted one to two word answers. We were mostly finished with setting everything up, but I really didn’t want to get off the call yet, so I was trying to think of more things to ask for his help with or for me to decide which microphone was perfect for my audi- oh my god. 

My audios. My voice. We’re literally on a call together and it took me this long to realize that the man that literally pays me to speak for him is getting affected by my voice. You’re such an idiot, Y/N. Well..Do I…Do I help him? I mean, that’s not what the call was for and I know he was just doing this to help me, not benefit from it at all, but I’m not gonna lie…I kind of want to. 

Something about his familiar voice has been keeping me on edge the whole night and I’ve just been ignoring it because that’s not what our dynamic has been since I started sending him personal audios and I didn’t want him to think that’s all I assumed he wanted. But…I can now tell from the way he’s talking, how deep and distracted his voice has gotten, that it wouldn’t…hurt..right? 

“I…um.. I think I’m gonna see how well this works for when I actually make the audios, if that’s alright with you. You know, see if I have to start recording from my desk or if the mics reach to my bed and actually work from there.”

”Oh! Yeah, go ahead,” he answers, his voice slightly more gravelly than before. 

Matt | Sunday 11:56 PM

She tries moving the mic to her bed, and just the thought of her laying in bed talking to me has me palming my dick through my pants. It wasn’t even sexual, and I felt terrible for doing it, especially because that’s not what this call was for at all, but the things this girl does to my brain and body are uncontrollable. 

After she decides that the Shure wouldn’t work for anywhere else but at her desk, she says that she may keep the other mic for that reason, and will test it out another time so she doesn’t have to mess with any more cords and things. And then she almost has me unload in my pants when she starts speaking into it again. 

“Since it picks up a lot of input like you said, I’ll probably start talking like this in some of the audios,” she speaks in such a soft, sultry tone. One that felt like she was right next to me, whispering in my ear.

”Jesus fuck,” I whisper out, unable to hold back my reaction. She giggles softly, that sound somehow shooting straight to my cock, too. 

“It’s good, isn’t it?” she teases. 

“You’re fucking killing me here,” I practically groan out.

”Don’t say that, you make it sound like it’s a bad thing.” 

“Oh, this is the farthest thing from bad. It’s just…Fuck. You sound like you’re right next to me. And your voice sounds so good.”

”Yeah? Then… You alright with me testing out what else the mic picks up other than my voice?” My brain instantly turned to mush. A noise escaped my throat before I could even answer, my mind just consumed by the thought of her touching herself while talking to me. 

“More than alright with it,” I finally say, my voice barely above a whisper as I try to hide how fucking badly hers affects me. 

“You gonna touch yourself to the sound of me doing the same?” She asks, her tone immediately turning into the one she uses when she makes her talking audios. Where instead of just her beautiful whimpers and moans, she directs you. How to touch yourself, to stop, start again, how fast to go, everything. Ones I’ve listened to more times than I can count.

”F-fuck. Yes,” I answer, immediately sliding my hand down my shorts and gripping the base of my cock. I let out a small gasp at the smallest bit of relief. 

I hear the wheels of her chair move back slightly and the sound of the mic move, probably her angling it down to make sure it captures more sound. My eyes were closed and I was imagining the sight before my eyes. Her sitting there with her legs spread on her chair, sliding her hand down her stomach into her panties. And just as I saw it in my mind, I heard her let out a soft sigh and the distant sound of wetness.

”Fuck, Angel. I can hear you.” She lets out a small giggle.

”Guess we picked a good mic, then,” she replies in an airy voice. 

I continue gently stroking myself to the sound of her through the mic, trying to keep an easy pace, matching hers. But the second I hear her soft whimpers start, I could feel myself get closer to the edge. 

“Fuck, Darling. You sound so good. I’m not gonna last,” I groan out, picking up pace.

Y/N | Monday 1:13 AM

This was the first time I’ve ever done something like this. I never did anything over the phone before, so hearing his soft groans and the slight sound of him jerking off in the background was making me insanely wet. I just know that the mic was picking up more sound than any of my audios ever had before. 

Another thing I’ve never had was being with someone vocal. Not just the noises he made, but as he started getting closer, he instinctively started talking me through it, wanting me to join him.

“I’m so close. You gonna cum with me, angel? Fuck, I can hear how wet you are,” He practically moaned out. 

All I could do was reply with whimpers and ‘mmhmm’s, focusing on his voice and the sounds he made. 

“Oh fuck, you are. I love the way your whimpers pick up when you’re about to cum. Come on, darling. I know you’re close.” 

The fact that he knew the sounds I made when I was close made this even hotter. I sped up my movements, circling my clit with my head thrown back against my chair, the knot in my core tightening by the second. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” he gasped out, immediately followed by a deep groan, one that shot me over the edge, joining him. 

I let out a loud moan, my orgasm shaking me to my core. My hand was soaked and I couldn’t catch my breath, so I just sat there, breathing hard as I listened to him do the same through my headphones and just stared at the ceiling, thinking about what the fuck we just did. 

Ever since I started talking to him, my orgasms have been more intense than ever before, and I’m now realizing it’s because he was on my mind. I start thinking of everything that has happened the past few weeks, all the sweet ways he’s treated me. The way he spoils me for doing nothing but bring him a peaceful or erotic distraction. How nice he’s been to me. Even the cute nicknames he hasn’t stopped giving me.

“I like Darling,” I finally say after a few minutes of thinking, after we’ve both calmed down. 

“Huh?” He asked with a slight chuckle.

”When you call me darling. I always liked when you’d comment it on posts or donations, but finally hearing you say it out loud, it just…fits. And it feels nice hearing you call me that,” I answer, blushing slightly at my random confession. 

“Good to know, Darling,” he replied with a teasing tone, making me giggle. 

TO BE CONTINUED

[mistylavendar]

◦˚pairing. caleb x fem!reader

◦˚short description: wedding day (fluff!!, but slight innuendo at end)

◦˚notes. ~1.1k wc. divider by by enchanthings

You are anxiously standing in front of the solid wooden doors leading into the main chamber the guests are patiently waiting in.

Your heart flutters when you hear wedding music begin to play, indicating your entrance. The doors finally open, showering you in golden morning sunlight spilling from the large windows of the reception hall . A slight breeze causes goosebumps to spread across your skin. The guests simultaneously rise on cue cheering and clapping to congratulate your arrival and finally sit after. 

But before you could move, your worried eyes immediately connected with Calebs and softened. The nervous air surrounding you disappears. You don’t know how long he’s been staring at you but you bet he hasn’t broken eye contact since you first stepped into the room.

You could see the hungry look in his eyes with the way he is unabashedly drinking you up—his purple eyes moving up from your face, down your dress and then up again, lingering on your lips. Nothing hiding the improper thoughts you could read on his face. You could feel the blush forming on your cheeks, slowly moving down your chest. Catching your change in color, Caleb quickly yanks his eyes back up to meet yours. Realizing you caught his shameless stare, his eyes widened in surprise, sporting a blush similar to yours. Little to your shock, he quickly returned back to admiring you. 

Even with all the prep talk you gave yourself before the doors opened, all the emotions you tried to keep at bay threatened to spill. You push yourself to walk, making it to the middle of the aisle before you realize there are tear droplets slowly making their way down your face. 

You stop walking and quickly try to blink out the rest of the tears collecting along your waterline without messing up your makeup even more. Before you have the chance to bring your hand to your face Caleb is already there, the base of his thumb brushing the tears off your face— his other hand running circles along your waist. You could feel his breath tickle your forehead before he places a warm, featherlike kiss, causing eyelashes to slowly flutter close.  

You stand there shocked at first, not knowing how he got there so quickly but nevertheless your heart bursts from the affection in his touch. How such an innocent gesture can unravel you and turn you into a puddle, you don’t know. You lean in closer, taking in his warmth and breathing in his scent. A gentle, faint smile paints your lips.

What felt like hours in a bubble where it was just the two of you, in reality seconds were passing. You look up to see his face only for there to be desperate tears coming from his eyes. Initially confused you reach out to touch his face but the look in his eye makes you pause. Instead you ask him why he’s crying. 

“I-“ he croaks out, face tilted downwards. “I never thought I would ever get to see you here with me on this day. You as my wife and I your husband. And to see you all emotional makes me unable to stop these happy tears from spilling” Caleb rambles, tripping over his words, his eyes crinkling with happiness. You could see the vibrant, swirling world of love carried in his eyes as he blinks himself back to reality. 

A dopey smile forms across his lips as he continues to stare into your eyes, going on and on about how he’d work everyday to show you how good of a husband he’d be and if they should start tonight on their plans for children. That statement sobered you real quick. Your thoughts were coming back. Sometimes you wonder if this man says whatever first comes to mind to see how you’d react. We’re in a wedding for goodness sake. Our wedding. And this man beside you is treating it as if you’re playing a questionnaire game at home. 

So before he gets down on his knees in the middle of the aisle and keeps the conversation going all by himself, you took it upon yourself to lead him to the altar, gently grabbing the hem of his sleeve. You knew how passionate Caleb got when talking about anything that surrounded you. 

Once on the altar, the officiant guided you and your precious husband to be to exchange vows with one another. Once done, you gave each other a simple gold band. To seal the deal, the officiant finally voices that you both may share the first kiss as a newly married couple. Before Caleb has time to process what he says, you jump at the opportunity, grabbing his face with both your hands and dragging him down towards your lips. 

You tease him first. Brushing your tongue along his lower lip and chastely giving him a peck. You pull back to look at his face and see subtle blush gracing his cheeks. But the look in his eyes. Oh, the delicious look in his eyes. It’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. They were so pure, filled with love and adoration. You didn’t know what you did to deserve a man like him. 

But it felt like some switch was flipped, a burning desire for another taste causes you to go back a second time. You went deeper for this kiss. Your face nearly crushing his. Your tongue outside of the entrance of his mouth waiting to be let in. His lips slowly parted in response. That pushed you over the edge. Without any care to the guests watching, you both sloppily kiss each other as Caleb was never one to back down from a challenge. Teeth clashed and saliva was exchanged but neither let up, it was your wedding day after all. Minutes later, you finally broke the kiss to hug your wonderful husband. Your cheek nuzzling into his hard chest. While the crowd cheers, you tilt your head upwards to see your lovely husband rendered into a cute, babbling fool. You couldn’t help yourself so you laugh, your sides slightly hurting but this time happy tears trailed your face. He continue sputtering out about how much loved you and how he couldn’t wait to shower you every morning and every night with the devotion you deserve. 

And you quietly promised yourself to keep him to his vow for all the years to come.

---

Several Hours Later… After many and I mean MANY rounds, 

“So about how many children do you….”

“Caleb” you shrieked. You couldn’t believe how many times you let him convince you to go another round. Every time he said it was going to be the last, he would use his big puppy dog eyes to manipulate you into giving in and the worst part, you fell for it every single time— hook line and sinker. You’re even more pissed off with yourself than with him. You finally prepare yourself for sleep. Caleb has his arms around your waist, face burrowed into your stomach. You pray you get enough sleep tonight because who knows what’s going to happen tomorrow morning. 

[dollyhao]

Can we bring back Loser Ellie x Bully reader? Please and thank you ❤️ but take your time and take care 🫶

cw; smut, tribbing i got y’all :) yall i ain’t never wrote about tribbing before (or tried it lol)

you anxiously look down at your phone while biting your nail. your stressing over the fact that ellie isn’t texting you back. by now you would be at her place banging on her door but… you might’ve taken it too far.

you took your anger out on ellie when she didn’t deserve it at all and she was understanding at first, you were having a bad day and you were pent up, so she gave you a chance to apologize. but you refused and decided ignoring her was the better option.

ellie looked really hurt before she grabbed her things and left your place. that was 5 days ago and ellie never goes this long without talking to you. shes been avoiding you, declining your calls, and ignoring your texts.

which is understandable given you still haven’t apologized in any of your messages, just a bunch of “let’s meet.” and “where are you?” texts. but when day 7 hits, your ready to get on your knees and beg for forgiveness. so that’s what you do.

“i’m sorry baby, i didn’t mean what i said.” your on your knees in front of ellie’s desk chair that she’s sitting in, grasping her hands, tears welling up in your eyes as you ask for her forgiveness.

ellie is staring at you wide eyed, she’s never seen you act like this. you never apologize or beg for anything, from anyone. but ellie can’t help but feel kinda… good when she sees the tears in your eyes. this obviously means you care and that you missed her.

she already ready to kiss your pout away before you start rambling about how you would do ‘anything’ for her to talk to you again. and who is she to pass up such a opportunity, “what are you gonna do? you really hurt my feelings…” ellie mumbles putting on a soft, sad tone as she looks down at the hands that are holding yours.

“what do you want me to do?”

‧₊˚✩彡

“i love you so so much ellie!” you are panting as you grind against your gf, bodies sweaty, pussies making the most lewd sounds as they rub against each other. you have her cute little nipples in between your fingers, twisting them and pulling as ellie holds on to your hips grinding against yours.

ellie has been wanting to try tribbing with you forever now but never had the confidence to ask but you seemed happy at the idea and more than willing to do it with her. but of course you can’t do this for long because your truly a pillow princess at heart so you collapse backwards on the bed, panting as ellie has to put in all the work.

ellie is not complaining as she lifts one of your legs next to your head as she frantically fucks herself against you causing sweet mewls to fall past your lips. ellie grips and slaps on your tits, “you sorry baby?” ellie asks you throwing her head back in ecstasy.

“i’m so so sorry els. i love you. you forgive me?” you trail your fingers in between your bodies rubbing at ellie’s clit. “a-always baby, always.”

[2hoothoots]

So I was going through your blog (again) and found some of your stuff mentions fsau Raz having ADHD, as somebody with adhd I’m intrigued, may I have some of those headcanons (canons??) related to that? Also, I would give “a penny for your thoughts” but I’m out of pennies, so here’s various images of a drawing of ur blorbo I put next to my animals, note that a rock had to be added in one picture to keep him from flying away (BONUS: his now permanent place with the wifi guardian frog)

NOTHING brings me more joy than seeing physical drawings of these guys, like, out and about. in situations. thank you for this gift, and ALSO for the great ask because it's a perfect chance to ramble

so first of all, canon Raz having ADHD is very real to me. he's constantly fidgeting and moving around, getting distracted by sidequests and scavenger hunt objectives, always talking to himself out loud, gotta write everything down so he remembers it because there's so much to DO!, running away from home because his dad yelled at him one time and now Raz assumes he must hate him forever... i could go on, but i think there's a lot of room for interpretation there!

in my headcanon, he never got diagnosed as a kid. maybe there were some notes about it in his reports each year, sure - but a little hyperactivity and distractability never seemed to slow him down. he excelled in lessons and on missions, and when he was with his family their performances gave him something to focus that energy into. it was only really when he turned 18 and graduated to a full agent that the cracks started to show.

because there's a big difference between the responsibilities you have as a minor, and the responsibilities you have as an 18-year-old living away from home! one who's expected to cook and clean for themselves, and take care of adult life stuff, and also work the 9-to-5 office job he's just graduated into that involves sitting in front of a computer and write reports all day.

short-term, he found he could get himself to power through a deadline with energy drinks and psi-pops (a lot of psi-pops...)

long-term, something had to give. he was working himself to exhaustion, constantly stressed, swinging between days spent staring at his computer screen doing nothing and all-nighters desperately trying to finish his paperwork before the deadline. it just didn't make any sense to him. he'd finally started his job as a Psychonaut, he was living independently like he'd always dreamed, he'd gotten top surgery after planning it for so long. he should have everything he ever wanted. why wasn't he happy?

following a deep post-surgical depression, about a month before his 19th birthday Raz was living out of his car, couch-surfing or sleeping in his office. he got kicked out of his apartment after falling behind on bills and rent. it wasn't that he didn't have the money, it was all just too much for him to stay on top of.

he'd probably have stayed in that misery hole for a lot longer if Frazie hadn't marched into his life and demanded he let her help him move into a new place, or she was telling mom that he was homeless. together, they sorted through all of his possessions from the last place - everything that had been hastily shoved in his car, or tossed in a box in his office, piled in a heap that was giving him anxiety even looking at it.

things do get better for him from there.

when he eventually explains things to Hollis, she gently suggests that he should get a roommate. he ends up moving in with Phoebe, and they become pretty good friends after a couple months! something about having another person around to help do the chores and wash the dishes and share the space helps, even if it takes him a while to admit it.

he gets his ADHD diagnosis, and finding the exact right medication and dose is a journey he's still on years later - but they're a huge help in getting him to actually knuckle down and finish his work on time. and the whole thing ends up being a chance for him to take a step back and really think about what he wants to do with his life. he'd always assumed that being a Psychonaut was his dream, but he'd never really reckoned with what that dream would look like before.

in the end, he sticks with it, but also decides to follow Lili's example in branching out. he applies to study a part-time Bachelor's in Psychology on a remote course, and gets accepted. juggling missions and paperwork and study and relationships (because the whole thing made him realise he also wasn't setting aside any time for himself, and wow, dating is a thing) is a lot - but he manages to figure it out, day by day.

(Lili comes back to the Psychonauts after graduating. she and Raz have both changed a lot over those four years, but on their first mission together they hit it off like a house on fire - and the rest is history!)

[shrimplymoray]

This post is me madly projecting with some x reader stuff. Not requested, I had the idea and my besties said "YES DO IT" so this is happening now lmao.

This has been on my drafts for a looooong time, so that's why I'm actually posting this now lmao.

Octavinelle Trio x Reader who is autistic with a special interest in Moray Eels

Azul Ashengrotto

Azul first laid eyes on you for purely business reasons. During the holiday season, the Mostro Lounge stays understaffed most times, and you were oh so kindly falling into his flourished word traps to strike a deal.

He, however, would have never expected all you wanted from him was to know all about Moray Eels that he, as a merfolk, knew. That was... rather odd and maybe even boring?

He got intrigued, were you trying something with the twins? They were his most loyal workers, so he couldn't allow you to do anything.

When you get into a relationship, after much hard work on both parts, he expected, no, hoped you would change this special interest from the slimy eels to the much more interesting octopus.

You... didn't quite catch the hints, though, and this has led to some rather jealous and insecure moments with Azul. Especially if the twins were involved.

One could say that he was so insecure, in fact, that he felt ashamed of even showing his octomerman form to you.

But after you realized all this jealousy and insecurity on his part, you did all you could to show how much you love him and appreciate him for the way he is.

Now your eel-filled room has a little octopus cove, full of things that remind you of Azul or that he enjoys so that he has a safe space to come to.

He still will glare at your Eel stuff when cuddling, almost as if the carnivores were real and trying to get a bite out of you.

"I suppose it wouldn't be bad to stay a bit in here, with you, if you promise me you won't be cuddling those slimy eels to sleep, but rather this much more elegant and cuddly octopus plushie..."

Floyd Leech

Floyd first approached you on a whim. He was bored, you looked interesting enough, and you didn't seem to have any sense of self to run away from him in fear of getting squeezed till you popped, and as such, he stuck for a while.

You were quite different from most people he knew, and sometimes you reminded him a bit of himself or Jade, which gave you some points on his side.

The thing that made him stay, though, was the moment you opened your mouth and asked him if he ever saw a Moray Eel.

You're really asking that? To him? A literal Eel-merman? Hah!

He did indulge you for a while because you actually seemed to know your facts. He would just push you around, sometimes carry you on his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, while you blabbered out.

When it came to you two dating, it was very much a surprise for everyone. Floyd? Sticking to someone for so long? That's new.

Floyd tends to cling to you a lot, and even though it gets boring to him real quick that you repeat your eel facts, he cannot for the life of him stop you, since when you ramble is the best time to cuddle.

Floyd will, though, get easily jealous of your eel collection. You have the real eel deal (ha!), and you keep cuddling the plushies? Meanie :(

He will constantly just take the plushie off of your hands and plop himself on top of you. No fake eel, just the real deal.

He didn't really tell you he was a mer-eel, he actually just oh so happened to be taking a swim when you were close, and oh, look, he is an eel!

He lets you play with his fins and will take any chance he can get to use you as his cleaning shrimp to get sand off of him. He just like how your little cute hands feel scrubbing the sand from him, it is like exfoliation!

"hey hey, guppy, wanna do something fun? ya can bring the tiny morays with ya, if ya don't mind a bit of dirt, ahahah~!"

Jade Leech

First met you as a tutor for your work at the Mostro Lounge, per Azul's request.

Found your mannerisms quite interesting, you reminded him of himself and a bit of Floyd too.

He was happy when you didn't distance yourself from him when he talked about his interest in mountains or Mushrooms.

In return, you told him you really really really liked Eels. Specially Morays.

He faked not knowing it and let you talk about it since as long as he could rant about his fungi findings he didn't mind having to hear what he already knew.

When you two began dating, he was very perceptive of your needs. sometimes to a scary level, actually.

He doesn't mind at all your eel-filled room. he finds it endearing, and he even uses some miniatures you buy to put on terrariums he gifts to you.

Autistic x autistic relationship, basically.

He will use your eel interest against you in a silly way, like "I can show you an incredible moray fact if you perhaps go hiking with me :)"

Tbh if you are with him, you should do the same. Makes things fun for you both.

Floyd and Azul are so tired of hearing the both of you talk about each other and enabling each other's interests, but Jade will never judge you. And he will actually shove shiitake mushrooms down other's throats if they do judge you.

The moment he showed you his mer form as per your request, after knowing from Floyd that they both are eels.

Jade doesn't mind you picking and prodding around his mer form if it makes you happy, but if you keep your guard down he will fake drowning you "just for fun :)"

Make sure to hide his mushrooms in return, or he will try funny business again, just saying.

"Oya~ I would never intend to purposefully hurt you, my pearl. But a predator is inclined to bite when their jaws are so open near a cute prey, fufufu~"

I wanted to write something for my fave trio for a while, so I hope yall like this! Other posts and the request for Bee and Vixx will be done shortly after this, Since I already have it in my drafts almost finished! Hope yall enjoy a bit of eeltism!

[pupuyvs]

22

(written)

Here it was, the day Jimin had been waiting for all week, dinner with Sohyun.

Taking one last deep breath, she opens the door to the private room the actress had rented for them.

Sohyun immediately looks up when Jimin walks in, flustering Jimin by the unexpected eye contact.

She went to stand to greet her, but Jimin quickly motioned for her to stay seated while she took her own seat across from her.

“Sorry I’m late.”

Sohyun simply shook her head, “No need to apologize, I haven’t been here that long.”

Jimin nodded, low key grateful about that fact.

“I didn’t expect you to choose a barbecue place.”

“I wasn’t planning to originally, but I found out you liked it.”

It’s official, I’m in love.

Taking Jimin’s silence as a negative reaction Sohyun spoke up again, “That probably sounds really creepy, I just didn’t know what you liked and since this is supposed to be a congratulatory dinner, I didn’t want to risk it being something you hated. So I watched a video and saw that you liked it.”

Jimin smiled at the girls obvious rambling, it was nice to see that the girl in front of her seemed to be equally as nervous as her, made her feel less of a loser.

“I didn’t find it creepy, I actually find it cute that you did research.”

The actress, clearly embarrassed, just muttered an “I guess” before clearing her throat.

“I didn’t know what you liked so I ordered one of everything.”

The idol’s eyes widen, “Everything? There’s no way we can finish all of that.”

Sohyun laughs, “Of course not, anything we don’t finish I can bring back home to Sooyoung and you can bring back for your members.”

Jimin furrows her eyebrows at the mention of Sohyun bringing something home to anyone.

Taking it as Jimin is confused the actress begins to explain, “Sooyoung, you know her as Yves, is my best friend. Though we’ve known each other for so long she might as well be my sister.”

The idol nods being able to relate to the girl, the members were like sisters to her too. Then she remembers something.

“Is that why your manager was handing out her cards?”

Sohyun winces slightly, “Yeah, she had been wanting to work with you guys. It was the reason why I said yes in the first place, which is no offense to you guys of course, I’m just not fond of the idol scene.”

Before Jimin could ask her to elaborate the server comes with all the food Sohyun had ordered.

“I’ve never done this before, when my friends and I went out one of them cooked. So it’s probably best if you do it.”

A lightbulb went off in Jimin’s head, “Why don’t I teach you?” Not giving the actress a chance to answer she moves to sit next to her, now happy with the lack of space between them.

She quickly starts to instruct the girl what to do, teaching her to cook it the way she hopes the girl would like it.

“So tell me the story about Midnight,” as she lays more pieces of meat on the grill.

She smiles when she sees Sohyun’s eyes light up at the mention of the feline.

“I adopted her three years ago from a shelter. She was originally a gift to this little girl, but her father apparently got rid of her. Soo and I thought our, at the time, new apartment was too big for just the two of us. So when we went to the shelter all it took was one look at her and I knew she belonged with us. She latched onto me more than Soo, so she just became mine.”

“Why the name Midnight?”

“Well that was the name the little girl gave her, it didn’t feel fair to take that away from her. She would’ve been hers, if it weren’t for her father, so in my eyes she’s just as much as Midnight’s owner as I am.”

Jimin pauses when she hears that and just stares at the girl in slight awe. The smile on her face widens when she sees the actress smile excitedly at the meat she just finished cooking.

They finish cooking in a comfortable silence, Sohyun taking it upon herself to organize the cooked meat. As Jimin goes for a piece, Sohyun takes one and places it on her plate for her.

Jimin can only stare at the girl once again, eyes filled with hearts. Sohyun, feeling her stare, looks at the girl confused. Before Jimin can think she speaks, “Are you flirting with me?”

Sohyun chokes slightly on the food she was eating,“Huh?”

Jimin just shakes her head, ears burning red, “Nothing, I was just kidding, sorry.”

“You apologize too much.”

“Sorry-”

This earns Jimin a playful glare before the two go back to eating. The dinner continues and ends without a hitch, the two using the time to learn more about each other. When they finish the two divide the leftovers and leave, since Sohyun paid before Jimin even arrived.

“Do you have a ride home,” Sohyun asks.

“Yeah my manager should be here soon. You?”

“I drove myself here.”

She drives? She’s so hot.

“Well, drive safely then.”

Sohyun looks at her weirdly, “I’m not leaving just yet, I’ll wait with you until your manager gets here.”

“But it’s freezing,” Jimin tries to argue back.

“And yet you still expect me to leave you here, alone, while you only have a long sleeve shirt on.”

Jimin had no rebuttal, she was too worried about being late, which she was anyways, that she forgot a jacket.

After ten minutes of Jimin checking her phone and shaking from the cold, she finally gets a text from her manager. Only for it to say she won’t be able to grab her for another hour since she has to get Giselle first. The text makes her groan out loud, she was going to kill those two.

“What’s wrong?”

“My manager won’t be able to get me for another hour, due to another member needing her. You should head home now, sorry for making you wait.”

When Sohyun stays silent in response, Jimin believes she may have actually left turning slightly to check she’s met with the girl holding out her coat.

“Here, I’ll drive you home.”

Thank you Giselle and Somi!

“Sohyun must be rich,” is the only thought Jimin has as she enters her car. The car was a perfect sleek black, with darkly tinted windows. The interior had nice leather seats and smelled just like the actress, vanilla. She saw the girl press some buttons when she started the car, which she soon realized must’ve been the heat since she feels the car, and her own seat, starting to warm up.

Texting her manager that Sohyun will bring her home, she looks up to find the girl staring at her.

“I kind of need your address.”

“Oh, right!”

Giving the girl her address, she watches her type it in to the car’s GPS, and then pull out of the parking lot.

During the ride all Jimin can think of is how attractive Sohyun’s side profile is, she’s so glad the girl has to focus on driving since it means she can finally stare all she wants.

“You can play something if you want,” Sohyun says to her.

Jimin rather just hear Sohyun talk but obliges anyways.

Turning on the radio she’s met with the sound of her group’s song blasting.

“You listen to us?!”

Sohyun visibly blushes at the fact she was caught, “Your new song is really good.”

“Aww, thank you, you’re so sweet.”

Sohyun doesn’t say anything in response, still flustered, so Jimin just connects her phone to the car. Playing a random song off her playlist, she allows it to play lowly, eventually lulling her to sleep.

Arriving at a red light Sohyun finally turns to look at the girl, only to discover her newfound state, causing her to unconsciously smile. As she traces the girls face with her eyes Sohyun comes to the realization that she finds Jimin to be one of the prettiest girls alive.

She forcibly tears her eyes away when she sees the light turn green. For the rest of the drive Sohyun begins to drive slightly slower so the girl can sleep peacefully.

When they finally arrive, Sohyun can’t help but feel bad for having to wake up the girl. However, she’s already been in the idol’s apartment parking lot for ten minutes and saw that her manager was asking where she was.

Gently shaking the girls shoulder she softly says her name. Getting no response she tries again, after a few more tries the girl starts to slowly get up.

Jimin, clearly confused, looks around. Making eye contact with Sohyun her own widen.

“Don’t apologize,” Sohyun says before the girl could speak, “We’re here.”

Jimin quickly unbuckles her seatbelt, wanting to quickly escape this embarrassing situation.

Opening the car door and getting out, Jimin turns around to face the girl one last time, “Thank you and sorry.”

Not giving her a chance to respond she closes the door and walks away. She only turns around when she hears her name being called.

“Jimin.”

“Yes?”

“…Never mind, goodnight.”

“Night.”

Once she enters the building, she hears the girl’s car drive away.

She sighs, leaning against the wall before she has a sudden realization.

“I still have her coat!”

prev - masterlist - next

a/n sorry chaewon nation

taglist: @thefckghost @emgchip @yoontoonwhs @rinapomu @jenlisaforthewin @flolio @petruchiosstuff @glassflowerpetals

[wannabanauthor]

Thanks to Tim Minear’s shitty writing we are forced to figure out why Buck and Tommy never talked about the future of their relationship during the six months they were together.

So here’s my half-baked theory to go along with said shitty writing; Tommy was so swept up in it that time passed quickly, and before he knew it, he was falling in love. But Buck’s move-in request snapped him back to reality.

We know and saw how much Tommy liked Buck, being the doting boyfriend who romanced the hell out of Buck. He was in it.

But maybe in the back of his mind, his fear of just being Buck’s first and not last was always there. Even after he gave Buck a second chance. And before he did, he seemed genuinely happy to see him at the coffee place.

He was enjoying his time with Buck so much that it didn’t really occur to him to have the future conversation, but that deleted scene with Henren makes it a little more complicated and hard to understand what they had discussed as far as the future of their relationship. Tommy said they were taking things very slow, but that Buck set the pace, and he was trying to keep up.

So they did have some talk at some point, but 8x06 just unravels all of that.

See? I can’t even explain it away like I did with the breakup. It’s just not a consistent narrative. That episode really did the worst way of breaking them up. Fanfic writers have written better BuckTommy breakups than the folks who get paid to do it.

I’m so confused as to how Tommy went from “it’s our six month anniversary” and having regular sleepovers with Buck without needing to bring anything but himself to him not wanting to move in to avoid getting his heart broken.

All their scenes and conversations before 8x06 don’t mesh with 8x06. The math isn’t mathing, They dropped the ball on crafting the breakup. It was stupid, half-assed, lazy, and inconsistent with their previous narrative.

It’s giving: let’s hurt our viewers for the sake of shock value

Which is so fucking stupid because way more successful shows haven’t even pulled that off well because the audience grows tired of it and no longer wants to get attached to characters. You don’t want your audience to become apathetic.

Every romance writer knows that the breakup needs to be crafted from seeds sprinkled early into the relationship and then surface for the breakup, but then they work on things and get back together. The breakup has to make sense. Miscommunication is a hated trope in romance. Also creating conflict from nowhere and retconning characters’ pasts to lead to the breakup is so fucking stupid. Nobody likes that. It doesn’t make sense unless you want the couple to break up for good, but even then, it’s still bad writing.

So in this rambling essay, I tried to figure out why Tommy and Buck never had a conversation about their future only to realize they kind of did, so 8x06 is still the odd episode.

It didn’t even have to be a badly written breakup. Because there’s one thing that people hate more than breakups: breakups that rely on never mentioned issues to fuel it

If you’re going to do something, don’t do it badly. Especially when it comes to me engaging with fiction. You can write anything you want, but if you’re a bad writer, I don’t fuck with you anymore.

Just like I don’t like it when criminals are stupid. Like that lady who robbed a convenience store when it was closed but also submitted a job application during the robbery.

Tim Minear, you are as stupid as that woman. Do better. You have all this white male privilege and you still suck at your job.

[rye-bread-soda-iceberg]

hii everybody, it's my birthday! I turn 21 today :D

it's been more than one full year since I made this blog and I'm not planning to leave anytime soon, so definitely expect more art from me! I'll take the chance to say I'm overjoyed that people actually like my silly little drawings and I've gotten so many "I love the way you draw Sampo/Ratio" it's insane!! I'm glad you guys do

speaking of which, it's also been more than a full year of me drawing my sweetheart Sampo from HSR <3

I realized i had fallen in love with him hard on the 12th of June 2023 in the 1.0 version, during the museum event, though I had my eye on him ever since the very start of the story

fixating on him helped me so much, not only bringing a lot of joy into my life but getting my attention away from a certain relationship that was making me miserable and subsequently making me realize how toxic it was. it may seem silly but to me it does feel like he saved my life a little bit. if I ever stop being fixated on him, something I hope will only happen in a distant future, I will still always owe it to him

on a lighter and sillier note, some time in January I finally got to see Dr. Ratio for the first time during the livestream. and I hated him. from his design to his personality there was nothing about him that I liked, and I used to be real vocal about it too

then I just switched overnight. I realized I was in love with him on the 28th of June of this year and I have been loving every single thing about him as much as I love Sampo ever since

in a way, he also helped me a lot! I've discovered a kind of passion in myself I thought I never had in the first place and fixating on him gave me the motivation I was lacking to work hard and improve myself. I feel like he changed who I am fundamentally as a person, although a part of what I am now had been already there, perhaps dormant. I guess you could say he awakened something in me, definitely

I had never found this much comfort in a single fictional character before, much less two at the same time. I'm grateful for many things and people in my life including myself and lately i've been so grateful for these two silly fictional beings who help me keep going every day

as I've mentioned a few times, I do ship myself with both of them! I'm mostly sharing, I love loving them, I love seeing them love each other And I love seeing other people/people's ocs and certain fictional characters loving them <3

I'm very particular when it comes to receiving gifts, so the best thing I can do for myself is make my own silly selfship art :"

but yes, not sorry for rambling, I just wanted to do a little something on this blog for the occasion :"3

hope you'll all have a great day!

[zweetpea]

Please don’t leave me alone!

(happy birthday my sweet angel)

Summary:

Fyodor my Baby 😭. This whole thing is very Tangled inspired. Tangled is art though so it’s all good 😌. Content warning: Self deprecating thoughts, Fyodor nearly dies. Some spicy implications at the end.

“Fyodor! I made you some tea!” You cheered from the doorway of his office. “Fyo… Fyodor… Fedya~” you whispered that last one seductively into his ear. 

“Is my wife being needy?” He turns around and pulls you into his lap. 

“No! I’m just going to miss you. Do you have to go on this stupid work trip and leave me alone?” You pouted.

“It’s for the greater good. You want the world to be free of sin don’t you?”

(A/N: greater good? I am your wife! I’m the greatest good you are ever gonna get!)

“I do. I know that by doing this peace will be brought to the world and we’ll be one step closer to bringing about a paradise for all mankind to cherish. Just please be careful love.”

“I will be, little mouse.” He smiled as he kissed your cheek.

The day he left he gave you a long passionate kiss on the lips.

“I love you Fyodor. I always will.”

“I love you too, little mouse. I will be back in a week’s time.”

That “one week” turned into two months. During which you cried yourself to sleep every night worrying to death about if he’d be okay. Some night you’d wake up in a cold sweat, have nightmares about him leaving you, him dying, him having an affair, him dying, him laughing to his friends about how stupid and pathetic and selfish you were, him dying! You had that one a lot. Various different ways popped into your head. Drowning, stabbing, beating, being shot, mauling, heart attack, an ability killing him.

On one fateful night though, you heard rustling coming from your basement. You went into the kitchen, grabbed a frying pan and crept into the basement. You heard a voice coming from your husband’s office down their.

“Where’s the first ad? No no no! Don’t you go dying on me!” 

You slowly slinked in, the lights off and the room only slightly illuminated by the many screens and monitors that adorned your husband’s desk. You tiptoed to the assailant and smacked him on the back of the head with your frying pan. You quickly ran to the light switch and flipped it on to see who had dared to enter your house.

“Fyodor? And a… clown? Wait… FYODOR! Your home! Oh no you’re bleeding!” You ran over to him, and chanted the incantation to unlock your special ability. 

“Moonlight bright and pure, lend me powers divine.  Give us second chance, let us have more time.  Just a minute more, a second too would be fine.  Please don’t leave me alone, give me back what’s mine.  You once were mine.”

“Did you miss me that much?” He smirked.

You buried your head in his chest crying, “I hate you.”

“No you don’t.” You could hear the smile in his voice.

“You’re right. You always are.”

“So since you have a new arm, can I keep the old one?” The other man said.

 You both turned to him. “I’m sorry, who are you?” You ask.

“Little mouse, this is my work colleague, Nikolai.”

“So this is your wife. She’s very pretty. He talks about you so often, whenever he’s not talking about his plans he rambles about you. Honestly though, his descriptions of you don’t do you justice.”

“Nikolai, get out of my house.”

“What about the arm?”

“If it gets you to leave me alone with my wife then you can keep it.”

“Alrighty then. I’ll see you around.” Nikolai disappeared into his cape.

Fyodor stood up and pulled you with him. “Love be careful. You nearly died.”

He shushed your concerns with a kiss, it was passionate and you couldn’t help kissing back. “Come on. For two months I’ve failed to fulfill you. I plan to make up for it tonight.”

“Fedya!” You blush.

He chuckled. “I love you, mouse.”

“I love you, too.”

[haysplumjam]

you can hear it in the silence

part 7

an: part 7! i have nothing particularly insightful to say here, but welcome to the victory tour

tw: normal hunger games stuff, torture, violence, gun violence, gore, suicide/suicidal thoughts and actions, prostituton, substance abuse

______________________________________________________________

I don’t understand how I manage to remain to terrible at jewelry making when Finnick and Mags improve so consistently. My twists and knots are fine, of course— it’s close enough to nets and ropes and the things I’ve spent my life making. The pieces I make are just flat out ugly. I take to wearing a ring on each hand. Mags’ on my right, Finnick’s on my left. They’re beautiful, and nothing I make myself looks even halfway decent next to theirs. 

By the time the eve of the tour rolls around, my dining room table has been turned into a factory of sorts. I twist the metal, Mags selects the stones— her hands firing too easily to make as many pieces as Glarius has demanded— and Finnick finishes them off, setting the completed pieces in neat rows. 

After a near week of no swims in the sea of fishing on the dock— just work— Mags yawns and does the sign with her hands for sleep, pointing at both Finnick and I. 

“I’m okay, I promise,” I shake my head, toying with the idea of honesty. “I’m too nervous  to sleep.” 

Finnick and I have made a habit of keeping the bad things from Mags. Sugar-coating them, as he calls it. She worries too much about both of us, and with her fragile health, she can’t take any more worrying. She needs laughter and meals together and swims in the water summer provides, not the harsh winds and scary thoughts and impending dread late autumn has given to Finnick and I. 

She takes one of each of our hands in hers, pressing her lips to the backs of our hands as tears well in her kind eyes. She’ll see us off at the train station tomorrow, but that’s as far as she’ll go, given explicit orders that because she wasn’t my mentor; she has no place on the tour. Undoubtedly, this is another of Snow’s punishments: I don’t know if it’s meant to hurt her or me or Finnick, but it succeeds in wearing on all of our hearts. 

“I’ll walk you home,” Finnick rises from a chair, giving me a look I know to mean he’ll be back. 

Mags kisses me on the cheek and I give her as much of a smile as I can muster as the two leave me alone in my too-big house. I pack up the jewelry supplies, tucking them into the cabinet beside the fireplace I’ve designated for their storage. 

The pieces on the table are beautiful, but nothing compares to the two I refuse to take off. Finnick’s holds a stone I now know to be turquoise, and Mags’ a sea-green one that almost matches. That stove is artificial, manufactured in One rather than dug from a mine in Two, but the comod forces me to forgive it. The beautiful shade of the water that day in the early fall when I decided that the capitol isn’t allowed to take the memories I have of my family. 

Glarius will be happy with my talent. He preferred painting, but Finnick convinced him it wasn’t my best choice. Of course, I have a talent for neither. Finnick and Mags do it for me as they do everything else. Even if I was able to handle myself, Finnick hasn’t been in the capitol in a month, meaning it’s been about as long since I’ve slept. 

He’s much happier, which helps me breathe a little easier, but he’s always around, meaning there’s no time for the green pills that bring me relief. I tried the pink ones for a while, but gave up on them when I found myself irritated with Mariana’s after-school ramblings. Staying awake is one thing, but it’s not worth the chance of hurting them. 

When night comes, I turn on every light I can and play music on the capitol record machine. Glarius would send new records if I asked, but I like the familiarity the songs bring. There are no words, but I make some up for my favorites. Song them softly to myself while I read a book of subject t myself to the awful television programs on late at night. Just one pill only makes me unable to open my eyes— keeps me trapped in fuzzier versions of the nightmares. While my tolerance is nearly gone, two pills don’t do it, either, they just make the nightmares stranger. Three pills is a guarantee I’m asleep when Finnick arrives at my house mid-morning. 

So I don’t sleep. Or allow myself to sit in the dark. Or blink for too long. Still, my conscious daze is close enough to sleep for me to start when my door opens again. 

“You need to get some sleep, Annie. This is going to be hard,” he sits down across from me. 

“Sleep won’t make it easier,” I shake my head. I know he understands what I mean. He has nightmares too. We’ve only talked about it once, but that’s all we needed. 

“What helps?” 

I can’t tell him about the pills, or he’ll undoubtedly demand the doctors stop sending them. I won’t be able to live a life outside of the games if I can’t go in the water or fall asleep on my own, and he won’t allow that. “Nothing.” 

“Then let’s at least sit somewhere more comfortable,” he rises from his chair, offering a hand that I accept and leading me to my sofa. 

He tosses a blanket toward me, and I catch it before it can hit me in the face, spreading it across my lap. I can tell what he’s going to ask me by the look on his face. He doesn’t want to do it just as much as I don’t. 

“Names,” he sighs. 

“Twelve. Eleanor Allister and Nathan Chance,” I begin. These ones are easier, comparatively. Both kids passed in the bloodbath and I never met either. 

Finnick nods. 

“Eleven. Meadow Loomy and Farro Whittaker,” I continue like this in the order of the districts we’ll be visiting, saving Cove for last. I didn’t know all of their full names until after the games, but there’s no world in which I could ever forget them now. 

“You just read off of the cards, okay? Glarius did a good job. I read them. Did you write anything for anyone?” He asks. 

He’d offered me the opportunity, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. The only ally I had that I didn’t kill was Cove, and no one in Four needs pretty words to know how much I loved him. Anyone who knew him already knows that. “No,” I answer honestly. 

He nods his head, “anything you want to go over again?”

“I’m okay. You should get some sleep,” I offer. As far as I know, Finnick really does sleep, somehow. Maybe after five years the memory fades some and the dreams become less vivid. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” he shakes his head. “Not if you’re not sleeping.” 

“I’ll try,” I regret my words. I should’ve just lied like I usually do. “I just wake so often and the dreams are so horrible, I…” 

“I understand,” Finnick speaks before I can even find the words to finish my sentence. “Why don’t you just close your eyes for a bit and I’ll be here when you wake up?” 

“Finnick,” I sigh. “It’s really okay. I’m used to them.” 

“I want you to rest before the tour, Annie. You look exhausted.” 

There’s nothing like a perfect specimen of a human telling you you look terrible on the eve of your every moment being documented. My dinner attempts to come back up as I think about the tour. The cameras. The families of the tributes. It’s too much, and I lose my breath, gasping for air. I know there is plenty, but I can’t find it. 

“Annie,” Finnick is scared again and I hate it. The look in his eyes terrifies me more than my inability to breathe ever could. 

“I’m okay,” I say shakily. Images of the bloodbath flash though my mind. Of Cove. Of the kids I killed. Of speaking to their families on the tour. 

“Annie,” Finnick takes my face in his hands. “You have to breathe, okay?” 

I nod my head, trying to focus on his warmth rather than the feeling of falling that’s overwhelmed me. I don’t realize I’m crying until he’s wiping my tears, speaking softly in an attempt to calm me. Eventually I rest my head in his lap, staring at the ceiling as he strokes my hair. The images fade slowly, and I’m able to concentrate enough on my breathing to stop gasping for air. 

“You’re okay. You’ll get through this,” he repeats over and over again. 

I cling to his words desperately. He got me through the arena. He can get me through this. He has never lied to me. He would never lie to me. Even more than that, he would never hurt me. “How did you make it through yours?” 

He shakes his head, “barely did. Mags got me through it.” 

Great. 

“You’re going to make it through just fine. Just read the cards,” he continues to stroke my hair, peering down at me with his sea-green eyes. They really are unlike anyone else’s I’ve ever seen. I could almost be convinced they were an enhancement from the capitol if I hadn’t known him for so long, but there’s nothing unnatural about them. That color is distinctly his. 

My eyes grow heavy as the night grows darker. Finnick keeps talking about tour. Only the good parts, of course— the food he thinks I’ll like and the victors he’s friends with and getting to see the other districts, but I just focus on his eyes and the sound of waves crashing just a dozen or so yards away, and eventually, I doze off. 

When I wake, the sun is up and my head is still in Finnick’s lap. I have to look at the scars on my left hand to ensure it’s real life and not a dream, and sure enough, they’re there. Finnick is sound asleep, hand still in my hair. I attempt to sit up without waking him, but he practically jumps the second I move my head. 

“I’m sorry, everything’s okay,” I promise him. “Go back to sleep.” 

“No,” he rubs the sleep from his eyes, “we promised Mags breakfast, remember?”

Of course, he’s right. I’m dumbfounded by the fact that I fell asleep, much less slept through the night— much less in Finnick Odair’s lap. My cheeks get hot at the thought. “I’m going to go change, I’ll meet you at Mags’?” 

“Yeah, sure,” he nods. 

I run up my stairs before he can even close the front door and stare at myself in the mirror. My cheeks are bright red, and my hair is full of dozens of tiny braids of all different types. My cheeks grow redder as I begin to unravel one closest to my face. 

I splash my skin with cold water from the tap before brushing my teeth and tying my hair into a crude knot on top of my head. My face has almost returned to a normal color by the time I’ve changed. Denim pants and a too-big sweater that belonged to my dad and then Atty and now me with my usual boots. 

I don’t bother locking the door as I leave my house, I just rush to Mags’, knowing Finnick will undoubtedly beat me. 

Mags is practically at the door with open arms when I arrive, her smile bright as ever. There’s a sadness in her smile, but I ignore it for just a few seconds as I hug her. “We’re going to be okay, promise,” I attempt to reassure her. 

“Eat,” she responds. Not exactly a vote of confidence, but her way of trying to make things feel a little bit better. 

I sit down at her small kitchen table with just three chairs to a table full of food. She has a massive dining table, but this one is from her home from before the games, so this is the one she uses. Finnick has changed, but his eyes are still heavy with sleep. I’m sure our shared stylist has something prepared for him from his team of dozens in the capitol. He’ll be back to perfect in no time. He sips a cup of black coffee, undoubtedly having already added a few dozen too many sugar cubes. I gladly accept a mug full of the stuff from Mags, adding a splash of milk to mine. 

“I don’t know how you drink it like that,” Finnick grimaces as I take a sip. 

“Normal,” Mags says as loudly as she can. She insists on talking, despite the three of us having learned as much as the capitol book had to offer of the hand signs. She’s a bit better now, though. I’m not sure about medically, but she sounds more herself. 

“Disgusting,” Finnick shakes his head, taking another sip of his. Mags has prepared far too much food, as usual. This time, it’s all distinctly District Four. Our salty bread and what must be a dozen fish and rice based dishes. 

“We’ll be home in two weeks, Mags, you didn’t have to do all of this,” I sigh, heaping my plate with small scoops of every dish and breaking apart one of the steaming rolls. 

She moves her hands slowly, allowing us to follow her words. ‘Leave home hard’ she signs, ‘how long no matter’. 

Finnick nods, squeezing Mags’ hand, “thank you.” 

We eat in relative silence. Finnick doesn’t bother me with the events of the day or the next few weeks, thankfully. He talks about water temperatures and how the changing seasons will affect trapping. Mags nods along with the conversation, contributing in her own way. 

By the time we clear our plates, Finnick’s nervous glances at his watch indicate that it’s time for me to start making myself pretty. Mags tells us to go, but we wash and dry her dishes and relish in her hugs for a bit too long. I hadn’t thought about how bad this was going to be for Finnick as a mentor. How different and somehow more terrible it will be. Mags ties another knot in my bracelet, kissing my cheek as she forces us out of her door. She’s teary-eyed, too, but she just tells Finnick he smells bad and insists I get the little braids out of my hair before my prep team arrives. 

Finnick walks me to my door slowly, staring at the pebbles beneath our feet for the entire journey. “I’ll wait with you for them to arrive,” he offers as we dwell at the bottom of my steps. 

“I’m okay,” I shake my head. “I’ll see you on the train?” 

“See you on the train, Annie.” 

While my last train ride to the capitol was to fight for my life in the arena, this one feels infinitely more deadly.

[boasamishipper]

tagged by @film-in-my-soul and @icemankazansky - thanks guys!! ❤️❤️❤️

Everyone deserves to toot their own horn and be proud of their work! So, this tag game is fairly simple.

Promote 5 works that you're really proud of and share a little about why you're so proud of them! Then tag as many people as you like. You can reblog this post and add on to it (why not create a giant reclist to throw around?) or steal this header (and border if you like) and make your own post.

tagging @bornforastorm @lookforanewangle @apartmentsmoke @maverickcalf @saltyfilmmajor @hacash @academicgangster @onekisstotakewithme and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it

Make A Wrong One Right

Top Gun, Iceman Kazansky/Maverick Mitchell, Goose Bradshaw & Maverick Mitchell

Maverick makes a wish and wakes up thirty years in the past. He reacts accordingly.

I've written a lot of Top Gun fics (sixty-three, to be precise, which is insane all on its own) but this fic is far and away the one I'm most proud of. Not only did I get to throw in all my favorite things (angst with a happy ending!! time travel!! magical realism!! back to the future references!!), I got the chance to explore in a more subtle way just how much Mav loves Ice, and tackle fun existential questions like, Would you change the past if it meant you might lose the future you love? And I feel like I balanced all of the above and stuck the landing really well! (Honestly, the whole story was worth writing just for the bit in chapter three where Mav calls Ice 'baby' without thinking and Ice bluescreens so hard he drops what he's holding.)

there's a raging fire in my heart tonight

Top Gun&MCU, Iceman Kazansky/Maverick Mitchell, Carol Danvers/Maria Rambeau, Carol Danvers & Iceman Kazansky, Iceman Kazansky & Tony Stark, MCU/Coherent Storytelling

“Carol, you can’t bring a civilian into this—” “Civilian?” The temperature in the room seems to drop twenty degrees as Ice steps forward, flinty-eyed and deadly serious. “I’m a captain. And I earned my rank, which is more than I can say for you, Rogers. Thanos killed my husband. You want to stop me from helping you out, you’re going to have to shoot me.” Silence stretches out, long and fraught with tension. Then Stark laughs out loud, and everyone turns to look at him. “What?” he says. “I like this guy.”

This was the first Top Gun fic I ever published, and the first Top Gun fic I wrote on my own. (At the time, I was working on baby, baby, i'd get down on my knees for you with the fantastic @academicgangster, without whom I never would have gotten into Top Gun or on the Tom Cruise train at all.) Naturally my first foray into this fandom ended up being this chaotic, complicated beast of a fic, where I wrote my faves Iceman Kazansky and Tony Stark and Carol Danvers side by side, fixed all my issues with Avengers: Endgame, and gave everyone the happy ending they deserved (especially after all the additional angst I put them through). I had a blast writing this fic and rambling about all the details with Cain (without her support this fic would never have left our tumblr DMs). There were a lot of plot points to juggle, and I managed to juggle them all. So though I've definitely grown as a writer in the (oh god) five years since, I still look back on this fic very fondly, and very proudly. And who knows, maybe someday I'll go back to this series and write more of Ice accidentally acquiring a son in Tony Stark and a granddaughter in Morgan. (Famous last words, I know.)

Judge Leon AU

Night Court (1984) / Night Court (2023), Dan Fielding/Harry Stone, Dan Fielding & Leon, Olivia Moore/Donna "Gurgs" Gurganous, Neil Valluri/Gabby

When his court-assigned public defender quits on his first night as an arraignment judge at Manhattan Criminal Court, Leon decides to reach out to his old foster father, Harry Stone, for advice. He finds Harry's widower, Dan Fielding, instead.

shot:

chaser:

I could not tell you for the life of me why the hands down angstiest fics I've ever written ended up being for an 80s sitcom whose plotlines include a ventriloquist's dummy committing suicide and my blorbo getting so horny he had to fuck a firehose about it, but here we are!! Over sixty-four thousand words later!!

In all seriousness, though, I'm extremely proud of this series. I have a lot of issues with New Night Court (I have a post in my drafts about that), namely that it lacks the edge and darkness that made the original so good, and this series gave me the opportunity to restore that edge and really make us feel Harry's loss, as well as the loss of almost all the other main cast members. I get to be goofy (a man holds the gang hostage on the advice of members of his favorite subreddit) and I get to be angsty (delve deeply into Dan's low self-worth and depression and grief post-Harry's death) and in all the spaces between, I get to write about how much Harry and Dan loved each other (and develop Leon and Dan's growing bond), and I do it all very, very well. (Certainly better than the NNC writers. Let me into the writers' room, guys!! Help me help you!!)

Austin Alone

9-1-1 Lone Star, Billy Tyson/Owen Strand

After the reopening of the 126, Billy and Owen give being friends with benefits a try. Inconvenient feelings ensue. / Season 3 AU, Owen-centric.

I co-wrote this fic with the lovely @lilalbatross while season 3 was still airing, and not only were we so in tune with the characters and the show that our fic accidentally predicted the future (exploration of Owen's abandonment issues! Owen getting trapped in a collapsed building!), but this fic set my standards so high that now the show can no longer reach it. (To be fair, this is largely because Lone Star decided to become the Tarlos and Wyatt Show above all else, but that's a rant for another day.) I'm proud as hell of this fic for a lot of reasons - I got Billy and Owen's voices down pat, put them in mortal peril that was realistic to the show, and wrote some banger lines of dialogue and prose that made me take honest to god victory laps around my house. The entirety of (the very long) chapter 6 might be some of my best work of all time.

For A Minute There I Lost Myself

Ted Lasso, Nathan Shelley & Original Male Character(s), Nathan Shelley & Ted Lasso, Nathan Shelley & Rupert Mannion

Nathan Shelley and the road to redemption.

[sigh] Really it's such a shame that Ted Lasso never got a season three and so we never got to see Nate grow and thrive at West Ham and bond with his players and stand up to Rupert and become more confident in himself and his ability as a coach and apologize to Ted and just in general have a redemption arc that was not centered on some random one-dimensional mean waitress or his ability to play the violin. But at least we have this fic!

I wrote FAMTILM for Yuletide in 2021. I'd never written Nate's POV before - all my Ted Lasso fics up to this point were about Sam and Dani - so I'm proud of myself for being able to capture the nuances of Nate's voice and write the slow growth of Nate's self-esteem and realization that he was in the wrong and his affection for his players (particularly Višnjić and Roubeni, who are in my top ten favorite OCs I've ever created). I'm also very proud of myself for taking what could have been a 30k word story and telling it just as well in under 8k, and writing a full Natedemption arc in less than a month that turned out to be ten times better than what Sudeikis and co accomplished in twelve bloated episodes.

[pitiplush]

Hi, I know I've been MIA for a while, but since the news about the cancellation of Shadow and Bone broke I've been sad and I need to let it all out. I've come to think of my blog here like a safe haven, so there's no better place for this.

These photos are of the very first original amigurumis I've ever made (sorry for the first photo, I hastily put it together just for this post because none of my photos seemed good enough). As you can see they are some of the characters of Shadow & Bone: Alina, the Darkling, Inej and Kaz. This was back in 2021, when the show premiered. Back then I had never heard of the Grishaverse, but when I saw the teaser my curiosity was piqued so I gave the books a chance and I LOVED them. After so many years on a reader's block and at a time in my life where I was struggling to get by, I had something new and exciting to look forward to. I loved the show (watched it twice in a row, actually), I loved the cast and I loved everything surrounding the Grishaverse. I even convinced two of my friends to read the books (and I regret nothing) 😂

I was so thrilled I HAD to do something, to create something new inspired by the Grishaverse. At that moment I had been crocheting only for a year but I thought I could try and see if something came out of it. That's how I crocheted Alina, my very first bookish amigurumi. It's not my best work, sure, but till this day I'm so very proud of the result. This was my first attempt at designing an amigurumi, I felt like I was improving my craftsmanship while honouring one of my favourite fantasy sagas. So I kept going, I crocheted the Darkling, made changes to get a better design, started putting more effort into my photos, even replicating the show posters. I kept growing my collection, adding Inej and Kaz and taking fun photos of all of them.

I didn't get far in terms of interactions and likes with them but I didn't care that much, I was just genuinely elated that I was creating something new with my bare hands and that was my priority.

And after them, I stuck to the book amigurumis. Created new patterns and characters, got more involved in photography and photoedition, and strived to do better with each new amigurumi. I got happier too, the thrill to create and share not only my craft but the books I love the most has been the best part of these last three years. And none of that wouldn't have existed without Shadow & Bone, without Leigh Bardugo and her universe, without that amazing cast and all of the writers and staff that have worked tirelessly to bring the Grishaverse to life.

So yeah, I'm heartbroken it has come to this abrupt and unfair end, especially when there was just a season left. In a way it feels like putting an end to a part of my journey as an amigurumi artist, this first part in which I was fumbling to learn and create something new. And as sad as it is, I want to say thank you too. It's not much, but it feels right to use my small amigurumi kingdom and reach to say thank you to everyone involved in the Grishaverse. You've made me unbelievably happy in so many different ways that I have trouble putting it into words.

Thank you as well to everyone who has taken a bit of their time to like, share and leave comments about my Grishaverse amigurumis. You helped me believe in my work and gave me strength to keep crocheting.

I will always remember the first time I showed Alina and the Darkling to my best friends and we talked about how I could crochet the rest, and which ones they wanted to see the most and "omg what if one of the actors noticed your work?????". It will never happen, but imagining the possibility still makes me feel a bit giddy even after two years.

If you've read this far, thank you to you too and sorry for my silly ramblings ♥️ If you love S&B too I'm free to cry together about all of the things we will never see on screen anymore.

P.S.: who would've thought that little me having a crush on Prince Caspian (aka the great Ben Barnes) would have ended in crocheting plushies inspired in book characters??? Not me for sure 😂

[jeanmoreaux]

Ok question WHAT is captive prince about and should I read it (coming from someone that enjoys aftg which like, you get the vibe)(I'm ok w a lot of stuff)

i get the vibes and tbh i'd say give it a try if you're interested! (AND PLS let me know what you think if you pick it up!!!) captive prince is not what people years ago said it was and it's not what all the haters say it is. also i don't think the blurb of book 1 does it any justice because this story is NOT about about kinky sex slavery. it's about so so many things, but not that. i talked about it a little in this ask already in which i even kinda drew an aftg comparison bringing up andreil in the tags and then getting into that a little more here. ((here is an ask that is a little spoilery but kinda touches on it too.)) i can't really say more than this, i think, without potentially ruining stuff for people who want to give it a shot??? i am so bad at talking about these books in a way that gets people to read them because they are among my all time favs BUT not every reader will get them and you kind of have to give book one a chance and trust me when i say book two and three are more than worth it!!! because there is a lot of uncomfortable stuff in book one that you have to push through!!! but it builds the foundation that the rest of the series doesn't work without it...... like. it all makes sense with context but that context keeps revealing itself throughout the story....

and just to clear up a common misconception: this series doesn't condone slavery. people who make that claim have either a) not read the series or b) abysmal reading comprehension (piss on the poor level). pls don't get me wrong it's not a perfect story by any means (there are enough flaws to find, just one of them the lack of female characters) but these books are sooooo JGJDKJDASHD to me you know. gave me the same kind of irreversible brainrot as aftg.

under the cut some handpicked non-spoiler texts of jenna's and my reread of capri this month that kinda belong in the realm of what i am getting at with all my rambling but actually say Nothing:

this is actually sooo funny because capri scarred me as a teen too and then i read dark rise and loved it and was like mmmmmh maybe i should revisit capri AND I LOVED IT EVEN MORE

[starguardianniom]

Greetings fellow Billy Enjoyer~ I wanted to say that I love your long essays collecting the little bits and pieces of information we got on our Billy bOi :D

Majority of my friends play HSR or Genshin and my friends who do play ZZZ are usually guys who are more after the ladies (and Lycaon but I'm not surprised XD) so I don't usually get the chance to fan girl about my bOi Billy 😭

We are being fed literal CRUMBS about Billy and while I'm glad, I am starving 😭, though I am of the belief that Billy is much MUCH more important than what we are currently led to believe atm, which is why they are giving us crumbs and the occasional nugget of information as of the moment.

I hope to see more of your essays, as I also pray for more Billy fanfics XD

WHY THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!! T_T <3 <3 <3

Well as a woman who is a lesbian but is bi toward fictional men (XD) I am of course in love with Billy. He single-handedly ended my previous obsession with Baldur's Gate 3 and I seriously have played non stop since august with ZZZ, though that now I have used everything for pulls I am left starving for trying to maybe get Caesar, and I hope to be so freaking lucky for when Miyabi will come.

Rest assured I will continue fangirling about Billy and will make it everyone else's problem on this site. XD

Honestly I find Lycaon just ok, like sorry but after meeting Billy like Lycaon seems to just not look as alive as Billy because Billy is so dynamic as a character that some just don't feel to have the same energy as him, and the guy is a robot yet he feels more human and alive than some people I know. Extra ironic about Lycaon I don't have him but I got his W-engine yesterday when trying to get Caesar so I'm like "but I don't even have you what the ehll do you want me to do with your w-engine???"

Yeah we are fed, also found more background on him while doing a commission in the Outer Ring yesterday, I'll post that later today once I'm back from work. ^^ I mean dude is a freaking android made of lost technology and it seems nobody cares, or well the ones that do are people looking to dismantle him or sell him or use him as a weapon.

I am still legit miffed that he doesn't have an Agent Story yet, maybe one day all agents will have one, hopefully, maybe.

Currently I am running after Caesar because she just casually drops info on Billy that I need so bad and either my character doesn't press further or seems to want to diss him and I'm banging my head on my wall to make the game stop insulting my boy. I legit wish now that I played as Wise instead of Belle a bit but on PS5 I tried everything and I can't switch to Wise when walking around, dunno if that comes later with the last part of Cheesetopia or if it's gonna be with Burnice.

Oh worry not essays and headcanons are coming, just that they take over an hour to write. XD But I don't have school or homework, just work because I'm 30 years old and said work doesn't requires me to bring anything work related back at home at all so I can just unwind and write my ramblings and observations and just me fangirling. XD

Now I'm currently trying to get everyone leveled up to level 60, and so far Billy is the most leveled up at level 47 because I legit used all the things I had to level up Jane, Seth, Lucy and Piper, my dude Anton is only at level 20 and I don't need Koleda so she's staying at level 1 (legit miffed to have gotten her instead of Nekomata I wanted the entire Cunning Hares faction dammit!)

Did some other pulls yesterday, gave me 1 Piper and 1 Anby. So currently I have Billy M2, Seth M2, Anton M2, Anby M5, Nicole M1, Ben M0, Jane M0, Lucy M1, Piper M1, Corin M4, Soukaku M6. I also got Piper's engine twice.

Also bought Amillion because I kind of legit did pretty much everything with Billy, Nicole and Anby so. XD

I also have tons of headcanons about Billy... that keep changing each time we get new info on him because it pretty much destroys what I mentally pictured so I have to adjust and I'm even more motivated after that. XD

Feel free to come chatting more about Billy. Love Billy squad unite. I'll answer once I'm home and can finally get in front of my computer.