#Is moments like this where creative energies combine haha

[drones-of-innocence]

🎆 Sing for Absolution: behind the scenes 🎆

Part two, or the narrative background of the collab between @elitadream and I!

If you'd like to see the visual background where Elita goes over her artistic process for the panels, you can find that here!

As for the story itself, it's been mentioned a few times that the plot was an idea that has lived in my head for a long time. Usually when I have a scene in my head like this one, I try to work out a way to fit it into a larger story as a plot point. For example, in my fic What They Don't See, the entire story was born from a scene I imagined of Peach tending to a wounded Mario in a cramped apartment bathroom. In Man of War, most of that story stemmed from imagining Mario resisting the hypnotic influence of the Shadow Queen as she takes on Peach's appearance to manipulate him. They are often pieces that I can forge into something larger.

However, for this story, I didn't have any larger story to attach it to, as it seemed very detailed on its own. Moreso than the "pieces" that I normally imagine. So it seemed so silly that I hadn't yet found a reason to write it. I was lamenting this one day to Elita during one of our many brainstorming discussions, and asked if I could share this half-baked plot with her. I typed it out for the first time and shared it with her. This is what I originally wrote in a series of scrambling messages to her:

O~o~O

Basically one night everything is calm and peaceful in the MK, except Mario gets this weird feeling in his gut, like something is wrong and he can't shake it. He feels strongly that he NEEDS to go to the castle, even at this late hour, but he can't even explain to Luigi why he's got this feeling. He figures he'll just jog by and hopefully put his mind at ease when he sees that everything is quiet and fine. Only, the feeling gets stronger. He's worried about the Princess, he can't stop staring at her balcony or get himself to walk away. It's a visceral sense of danger; he's on edge, fists and jaw clenched, certain that something is wrong. And Mario is not a man to doubt his instincts. 

But, he's kind of warring with himself because he needs to see Peach, but he knows the castle is asleep and Toadsworth would never allow him to visit, so his options are to walk away or to sneak into Peach's room. But at some point the instinct becomes too strong and he snaps. He has to get to her. He climbs up the castle wall and hops onto her balcony, keeping to the shadows and staying very quiet. 

Peach is fast asleep. She has a luxurious and comfortable bed, and it puts his heart at ease to see her resting so peacefully despite the alarms in his head. He's horrified with himself because he knows this is very bad and creepy, but he literally can't leave. His instincts will not allow him to leave her now when she's apparently unharmed and snoozing, so cute all tucked in. He's never seen her without her hair done before.

Unknown to him, Bowser sent Kamek on a secret mission to kidnap the Princess. This is a stealth mission designed to go as smoothly as possible; instead of barging in and earning the wrath of the brothers, he'd send for her as she slept so Kamek could cast a spell on her to keep her asleep and quietly take her away to the Darklands. Then Kamek would remain as an imposter (as he's done in SMBW) and the Mario bros would (in Bowser's brain) not notice anything amiss.

So Kamek makes his way across the Kingdom, laughing to himself how simple and easy this invasion is. It'll be no trick at all to kidnap the Princess. It's a wonder they didn't conjure this plan before. He flies straight into the defenseless capital of Toad Town, and glides right through the balcony into her room. It's dark and soft and quiet. There, the vulnerable Princess lays under the light of the moon, having sweet dreams and completely unaware of what's about to happen. He raises his wand with a leer, only for a low voice to speak up.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." 

Kamek whips his head up, only for Mario to step into the light, anger burning in his eyes. He'd apparently been there for some time, sitting in a dark corner of the room watching over the Princess, and is not happy. This is literally worse than the worst case scenario he'd imagined. Mario's Firebrand activates, Kamek's wand lights up, and he attacks.

He'd known Mario to be a very aggressive and loud fighter, and he realizes that Mario is leaping at him and being very careful with how he lands and strikes so as to not make any noise. The Princess is still sleeping. Kamek's almost offended that Mario doesn't see him as a challenging enough adversary to go all out, so he starts to laugh and shout and deliberately aim for destruction. Mario snaps at him to keep quiet and lands a harsh blow, knocking him off his broom.

Kamek clatters to the ground, and Mario freezes, whipping his head up to check if the Princess has woken up. She lets out a long sigh and rolls over, undisturbed. Kamek takes the chance to leap up and tackle Mario to the ground, where they wrestle all over the floor. 

Mario gets close to subduing him, but Kamek is smart and his wand happens to be close enough to shoot a spell directly into Mario's solar plexus, which stuns him briefly enough for Kamek to scramble toward the bed and start to rear back with his wand, aiming right for Peach.

At his shrill, victorious cry, Peach snaps awake only to see Mario tear Kamek away from her in a rage. She screams, Kamek screams louder, and Mario finally lets out a furious shout as he hurls Kamek into the wall with enough force to shake the room. When Kamek slumps against the wall in a daze, Mario grabs him by the front of his robe, yanks him close and growls "whatever you try to do to the Princess, I will do to you ten times worse." 

Nodding rapidly, Kamek stumbles to his feet once Mario hurls him down again, and scrambles to get to his broom to fly away, only for the Royal Guard to burst in. They heard the noise and came as fast as they could. Peach yelps, she watches all of this with wide eyes, clutching her blanket to her chest. Mario instructs the Guard to take him prisoner, and they take him away to the dungeon. 

The door shuts as Kamek is detained, and the room falls silent. Mario is breathing hard. Peach is, too, quivering on her bed.

He can hear her when her throat starts to get tight and every breath sounds like a tiny whimper. Mario looks at her, eyes wide, and Peach looks so frightened and helpless there. "M—Mario?" she calls for him softly, and he can't help but go to her.

He doesn't know how to explain himself, to apologize for why he's there, but suddenly she's in tears and reaching for him and Mario is forced to sit beside her as she buries her face in his chest, shaking. It breaks his heart to see her so upset. "Mario, I—I'm so scared," she says to him, and that's what causes him to finally give in and hold her.

In her gorgeous little room, on her soft bedsheets, her bed surrounded by sheer curtains, he feels so out of place in his overalls and having just worked up a sweat, heart still pounding from the fight. But he couldn't ever deny her. She needed comfort and she was asking him for it. He holds her fiercely, murmuring soothing words into her hair, and trying to help her shaking body go still. Her hands clutch at his shirt.

He holds her until she stops crying, and keeps holding her until she stops shivering. And he still keeps her close until she's composed again, her body more relaxed than tense. The moment he does try to extract himself, she gasps and holds him tighter. His heart aches because he wants nothing more than to hold her like this forever, but he knows it's not his place. He should walk away. He should apologize for his intrusion and leave her be, but she resists. Something protective and warm inside him roils when he tries to insist to himself that he needs to let her go.

"Stay with me," her plea comes in a small voice, smaller than he'd ever heard her before. He'd seen her command troops, allies, negotiate dicey political situations, but he'd never heard her sound so vulnerable. "Please, I don't want to be alone."

He can't deny her. He physically can't. He concedes with a soft hum and encourages her to lay down. She won't even let him leave the mattress to pull a chair beside her, so he sits on top of the sheets, holding her hand. It's very late. Luigi is going to be curious about what he did. But he can't leave her, especially not like this. Cold and shivering and frightened. She eventually asks for him to lay down so she can press closer to him, and despite how strange it feels to lay in her bed, he does.

He starts to get sleepy after enough time of staring at the high ceiling. His heart rate calms down, his body begins to relax. Right as he thinks she's already fallen asleep, she shifts to hold him a little tighter and whispers "Thank you." then, quieter, she adds. "I feel safe with you." 

And Mario's affection for her only spirals deeper and deeper because there is literally nothing more this man wants in life than to be the reason that she is safe, that she feels safe. Her affection is spiralling too; he's so warm and his presence is so steady and certain. She's never felt more secure in her life, and she knows rationally this is improper, but somehow this is also the most right thing she's ever felt in her life. She wonders if Mario could possibly feel that, too.

O~o~O

At this point, I was simply trying to carry across an idea and write it out for the first time, as it had lived only in my head and absent day dreams for literal years. So you can imagine my shock when Elita sends me an entire storyboard (of 22 different sketches!!) that captures the plot!

(Here is the screenshot of me scribbling over her sketches while we were trying to figure out which shots to keep 🤭 I drew hearts on the panels that were my absolute favorites, and she mentioned the panel where Mario's glaring down at Kamek with the heart unintentionally gave them romantic tension 😂 Now that would be a plot twist!)

I was completely boggled that this particular idea captured her imagination, too. We quickly agreed to work on a collaboration after that, where I refined the plot, and she refined the storyboard. What followed was weeks of sharing development, screaming at each other in delight, and working very hard on our respective parts. What I estimated would be a light 3k fic built and built until I was at about 7k 😳And when I was done with that, Elita sent me back an entire doc of the story with her added feedback after every paragraph, kind of a play-by-play of her reaction to each moment of the story. It was so sweet and I'll have that doc saved forever 💖

(Here are two shots of the doc where she reacted to the text, the story in blue and her reactions in red. Fun fact: the line "could she know he only dreamed of her?" was paraphrased from the lyrics "I only dream of you, my beautiful," from the actual song Sing for Absolution! Also, the "spores alive!" line is a reference to a line used in Super Mario RPG 👀)

Elita and I had worked together before, but never quite like this where a project began with the intention of sharing it together. We've inspired each other a lot; from this silly little fic I wrote that she based a sketch off of, to this piece she did for New Year's that inspired me to write One Step Closer. She has told me before that she had been reading my stories as she got into the fandom, and to be honest it was this piece of hers that brought me back into it last year. So it was very much a given that we should definitely work on a project together!

That mutual inspiration really got to work in Sing for Absolution, too. While the plot was my idea, many of her ideas found their way naturally into the narrative as well. For example, she mentioned the Fire Flower in her background post. I was delighted that she allowed me to reference this piece of her lore from this Valentine's Day piece she made, and include this notion that the Fire Flower is responsive to the bond between Mario and Peach. Elita always brings a kind of wonderful, unexplainable magic with her ideas. Literally and visually! She also mentioned that she borrowed my concept of Peach's healing power, and gave it true form by illustrating it as this soft pink healing light.

Another point of our muses coming together was the Yoshi plush that we gave to Peach that she has with her in bed. We dicussed comfort objects, and how such a soft little detail adds so much character and vulnerability. I've mentioned this previously, but as soon as Elita suggested the object in question be specifically a Yoshi plush, I immediately agreed because of how she's portrayed Peach with Yoshis, and also because Kamek is the antagonist of Yoshi's Island so it gives him a reason to sneer at her.

The fight was such a fun sequence to work on. Referencing the Firebrand is one of my favorite things to do when I write Mario fighting, and Elita illustrating that takes it to another level entirely. Kamek's magic was another thing we discussed together; we somehow came to a similar visualization and ultimately combined ideas to create the stunning neon purple and green light that you can see in the sixth and seventh panels. Using words that evoke fire (smoldering, simmering, emberglow) is also something I did very purposefully in my planning to really execute Mario's powers and rage. It was that I think that partly inspired Elita to give Mario those glowing eyes, so that would be an example of a new concept that came out of this story 🔥

We decided to split the story into five parts to let the art and writing shine strongest together. On my own, I might have published the whole thing, and Elita might have had more parts if it were one of her sequences. We have diagrams and color coded text that we went back and forth on for a while to decide how to best let each other's work be most effective. I'm very pleased with how it turned out, and I may try writing short chapters in the future!

One other little detail that Elita left up to me was the name of the story. I almost never have an idea that doesn't already come with a name, so I really had to scramble to find one. As music always inspires me, songs are ordinarily my go-to. (You can find many examples of this in my stories already, One Step Closer and Man of War already being two) Originally, I was going to name it after a Keane song, but I decided to save that particular one for a different project, as the tone and lyrics were entirely too soft and sweet for the plot. Then, one day Sing for Absolution just came up on my playlist and I immediately knew it was the right fit. Any Muse fan would know right away based on my username alone that I'm a big fan 😂 I got to see them in concert shortly after I told Elita about the song and shared why I thought it fit. I could make a whole other post about how the plot fits with the song 🤭

Finally, it would not be truly a piece done by Elita or me if it didn't include all the Mareach fluff 💞 The tenderness was absolutely agonizing, and the reason that final chapter is the longest was 100% because both of us absolutely love to dwell on Mario and Peach's tender feelings for one another. Elita actually surprised me with the 2nd to last panel very recently! Across her storyboard and my original description of the plot, you can see what sort of things were altered and moved around, while new ones were also added in!

It was an incredible privilege to work on such a project with Elita. I know we'll put our heads together again in the future, and it makes me so happy that so many enjoyed what we came up with together!

[ofcloudsandstars]

October Magical Dates and Astrological Transits

Welcome to the most fantastic month of the year! My birthday month Halloween month!! We are sandwiched between two powerful full moons that will take us on a journey deep within ourselves to find where our energies could be suppressed, where we feel oppressed and how we can empower and transform ourselves. Each major celestial event feels like part of a chapter of self discovery and empowerment that leaves us shedding away what we no longer need and having to transform ourselves to evolve into an elevated new level.

As usual I will make additional posts on some important days as they come but below is the full month of October!

----

Week 28 - 4

1st - ☾♈ Full moon in Aries Happy Lunar Festival to those who celebrate it!

We kick off October with a full moon!! The fact that this month is framed by full moons and full of transits that force us to confront our buried emotions sets the tone for October and for us to make peace with our shadow sides.

This moon is very special for a number of reasons as it's the Harvest Moon (the full moon near the Autumnal Equinox) and it's the Aries full moon which packs a lot of power. The Aries full moon often asks us to step aside and focus on our needs and goals especially in relation to our partnerships or what we may contribute to a relationship. This full moon may be an aggressive presence in rocky relationships where people's needs may erupt to the surface if they are not being met or honored by their partner.

This fiery moon will be conjunct Mars rx and Chiron in Aries merging our unresolved childhood traumas with our repressed energy and motivations that the mars retrograde brings. Full moons can be cathartic and this can demand us to bring release to what we may have buried away. Challenges can trigger our deep emotions that may get expressed through explosive anger, yet it's a time to take note of what those feelings are and try to heal by making healthy decisions that honor our feelings. This moon will also trine Venus in Leo which will help to smooth it out and bring a pleasant vibe to it's energy. Venus does want to have harmony and trines love unions so in the realm of relationships this can bring a moment of peace or compromise and a window to discuss anything that needs to be addressed in relationships. Finally this full moon may feel intense with the squares coming from Jupiter rx, Saturn and Pluto rx in Capricorn. We may feel burdened by our responsibilities, restrictions (especially with Covid regulations), the powers that be that are constantly avoiding reform. This can also add to the tension of the mars conjunction and feelings of repressed anger or suppressed energy. We will be craving release. It's a good time to focus on how we can redirect our energies to honor our needs especially in relation to our inner child and what needs we were neglecting before. Full moons are great for release and attraction magic so you can use the energy to draw your new reality towards you, however if you are feeling the frustrations of the squares, take a moment to do some visualization meditation to really ground the energy and emotions of the reality you want. Try to avoid going into manifestation carrying that frustration or else it can seep into the reality you are trying to attract your way. With the moon in Aries, it's a great evening for fire-based magic. Candle magic goes well with attraction and manifestation spells.

2nd - ☾♈ Venus enters Virgo

A new sensuous cycle begins as Venus enters Virgo. When Venus is in the sign of healing yet practical virgo, we tend to express our love and care for others through acts of service and being supportive towards each other. We tend to find enjoyment and pleasures in things that are sensual yet practical. We may feel more inclined to treat ourselves through self care that honors our health and physical well-being. We could easily feel guilty if we are too self-indulgent or frivolous in this time. It's a wonderful transit to practice self-love in the everyday tasks such as taking care of our bodies and appreciating wholesome foods and activities. The shadow side of this energy can be us being overly critical of ourselves, picky with our partners or worrisome. However instead of worrying about what we cannot fix, we should try to turn the energy inwards to help nurture ourselves and whichever insecurities arise, find ways to be patient with ourselves and focus on inner healing.  

3rd - ☾♉ Pluto direct in Capricorn Moon enters Taurus

The energy of this outer planet is moving direct finally. Though it is still in it's shadow, the period of introspection, inner soul-connecting and facing our deep shadows has come to the end of this phase. It's now time to address the grip of power coming from powerful authorities which dominate our lives and undermine our power. A lot of these themes were already brought to light this year and these themes will grow only more climatic as we approach the year 2024 when Pluto will complete it's return for the USA's government chart. (Even if you don't live in the USA, the impact of these political events can ripple across most of the world). The structures revolving around massive businesses run by oligarchies and police states are slowly decaying and transforming and the period of reflection has come to it's end for now.  

4th - ☾♉ Moon in Taurus When the moon is in Taurus, it's a good time for taking things slow and to relax. It's a great time for kitchen magic, earth and plant-based magic and self-care magic.

----------------------- Week 5 - 11

5th - ☾♉ Same as above yet this moon will be void of course so it's a good rest day and best to not start anything new.

6th - ☾♊ Disseminating Moon | Moon Trine Sun Moon enters Gemini

The waning gibbous moon is a great time for taking stock of your progress during this lunar cycle and celebrating any little successes you’ve managed to accomplish so far no matter how small. It’s a lovely vibe for socializing, spreading generosity or just taking the moment to enjoy life. When the moon trines the sun it’s a harmonious time that brings a lot of luck. When you take stock and realize that you may not be where you’d like, then it’s a good time to catch up on work to help you out or do magic to bring opportunities for doors to open for you. It’s a good time to wrap things up or spend time socializing or alone enjoying life!  

7th - ☾♊ Mercury in Scorpio opposite Uranus rx in Taurus Draconids Meteor Shower

The combination of Mercury opposite Uranus rx along with a meteor shower can bring unexpected happenings, sudden epiphanies and new insights. This energy can also lead to other unexpected happenings which can bring discord and slight chaoticness. Though today is not a great time to make plans, it is a great time to go with the flow and be open to exciting encounters or changes in our paths that life may bring us. The energies today may bring many surprises and sudden changes that may electrify us as it brings something new to our routine yet it can also impact areas such as transportation or technology and cause it to have issues. Give yourself a bit more time with commuting or patience with electronics today. Magically this is a great time for trance meditation with binural beats to help bring in new insights or activities such as freewriting to get your stream of consciousness out.

8th - ☾♋ Moon Enters Cancer

When the moon is in Cancer it’s a good time for magic around the home such as cleaning and cleansing, kitchen magic and bath magic. It's a great time for self-care rituals and water-based magic.

9th - ☾♋ Last Quarter Moon Mars rx in Aries squares Pluto in Capricorn

Though last quarter moons are generally reflective, this last quarter may feel very intense with Mars rx squaring Pluto in Capricorn. We may feel the same themes of being repressed by authorities or powers that be that surfaced to our consciousness during the Aries full moon being revisited today. We may reflect on how these powers have suppressed our energies in the past and contemplate how to overcome them today. It's a great day for road-opening and barrier breaking magic to get rid of obstacles in our way.

10th - ☾♋ Venus in Virgo trines Uranus rx in Taurus

This transit bring a lot of benefits for us to try new things or meet new people that can help us push our boundaries and broaden our perspectives. It's a great time to honor our values and individuality (especially in the themes of our health and work ethics) by exploring new hobbies or anything outside our usual routine. This is a great time for creativity and experimentation especially in the areas of you connecting with your individuality.

11th - ☾♌ Sun in Libra squares Jupiter in Capricorn Moon enters Leo

Today is gonna feel dramatic and optimistic yet with a shadowy side to dive into excess and pump things up. Jupiter squares tend to add gas to the flame which is great for our enthusiasm and energy levels yet it can lead to over abundance, over confidence, over spending and over indulgence. Paired with the moon entering dramatic Leo and our confidence levels and disregard for our usual restraints may fly out the window. (HAha it's my birthday today...) It's a great day for partying and enjoying life yet also knowing when to pull the plug. Make sure to budget yourself wisely today, put on lucky or protective charms and not over indulge. It's a great time to show gratitude and make offerings towards the spirits that look over you.

----------------------- Week 12 - 18

12th - ☾♌ Balsamic Moon | Moon Sextile Sun Jupiter in Capricorn sextiles Neptune rx in Pisces Mercury in Scorpio sextiles Venus in Virgo

The Balsamic Moon is the waning crescent moon after the last quarter moon. It's the perfect time until the new moon to shed what you no longer need. It's a time of taking action for banishing, cleansing and shedding. The next few days will have aspects that will push us to face our shadow selves along with hidden traumas and ask for us to shed what is no longer needed. With the Jupiter and Neptune rx sextile, it will make it a dreamy and magical day. It would be an excellent day for magic, celebration and exploring our creativity and path. Jupiter will want us to expand on our creativity and connection to our spiritual side today with it's sextile with Neptune rx. Anything ranging from divination, trance meditation, astral projection, dream magic and journeying would be a great idea today as the energies will encourage us to experiment. Mercury will also sextile Venus which will push us to want to deeply explore our connection to sensual pleasures in a healthy and practical way and maybe create that connection between what is healthy, wholesome and practical which can enrich our minds and connect us with our souls. Today is a great day to plan a ritual, do meditation and any type of magic that encourages you to explore yourself and your boundaries.

13th - ☾♍ Sun in Libra opposite Mars rx in Aries Moon enters Virgo

Mars will be incredibly bright in the sky this evening as the sun moves opposite it. We may notice a red star shining brighter than usual in the evening sky as the sun fully illuminates the retrograding planet. However energetically this aspect can bring up external events that can force us to reckon with our sources of motivation, our source of drive and repressed energy or anger. Where we may feel that our energy is stifled or repressed can come out unexpectedly through events that may trigger us to face this aspect of ourselves. With the moon now in virgo we may be able to look at these passionate emotions through an analytical yet healing perspective. We can easily find solutions to express our emotions and understand them in a clearer light. Today would be a great day for shadow work in understanding our repressed energy and how we can find a solution to express and release it.

14th - ☾♍ Mercury retrogrades in Scorpio

Every other planet this year has had some time off so it's no surprise Mercury is ready to join the club. Mercury is about to go retrograde for the next few weeks, diving us into our deep underworld to face the shadows hidden in our psyche. Eventually it will retrograde back into Libra forcing us to re-evaluate our personal values and relationships. Whatever shadows that are unaddressed lurking in the corners of our mind will come out now to be reckoned with. Just in time for the spooky season!

15th - ☾♎ Sun in Libra squares Pluto in Capricorn Moon enters Libra

To add to the flavor of yesterday, today we get to experience the INTENSE square of the Sun and Pluto locking horns. This energy can trigger fears of being controlled against our will or more aware of our shadows that may bring up our need for control. There could potentially be ego conflicts with other powerful people or authority figures that will tighten their grip on everything. We could either feel pigeon-holed today which can create challenges that force us to either defend ourselves or make a major change or cause us to crave power in order to control the situation around us. If desires for power emerge today, pay attention to what your shadow self is telling you and reflect on the source of these deep rooted fears. Is it coming from past negative events? Traumas? Even past lives? Is it from current events? Working out what negative emotions may arise today can give us insight on the general theme of this month of where we feel that our energy is repressed and how we can make changes to break free from our current shackles. (There is also this theme coming from Uranus still being in retrograde as well). Additionally the moon will have entered Libra and begun it's new moon phase and will be opposite Mars rx today so there will be emotions emerging from repressed energy that we will be more aware of and be able to observe. With mercury retrograding in Scorpio it will be a great time for shadow work today as well.

16th - ☾♎ New Moon in Libra Sun in Libra opposite Chiron rx in Aries

The moon will be opposite the sun today as it begins it's new cycle in Libra. The new moon in Libra asks us to review our values, what makes us balanced and our relationships for this cycle. This libra season our values have been questioned, along with perhaps, our stance in situations or previous compromises which could have undermined our freedoms and repressed our emotions. We will be asked during this new cycle to re-align with our values, evaluate the relationships that still align with our best selves and make changes in areas that do not reflect our values or that may suppress us. This moon will also square Jupiter, Saturn and then Pluto in Capricorn tying together the themes of where we may feel burdened and oppressed. Especially with the global political climate it's a good time to see where our complacency has lost us our freedoms and where we need to take action to ensure us a better future.

This new cycle may feel more confrontational than the usually harmonious libran energies we are used to. The Sun will be opposite Chiron rx in Aries bringing us potential sudden external events which could trigger our inner trauma, show us where we need to heal physically and mentally and make us more aware of adversity that we need to overcome. We may be brought to more awareness of what trauma could have fed the shadow sides or toxic traits that have been holding us back. As we are in Shadow Work/Shedding season it’s a good time to look into these traits during the beginning of this cycle and shed away what no longer holds value for us. 

17th - ☾♏ Eros enters Virgo Moon enters Scorpio

The lil' asteroid of passions and inner fire moves into Virgo today shifting our inner fuel to find more spark in the areas of life revolving around service our health and practicality. We may be more reasonable and solution-oriented while pursuing our passions. We may find more interest in sex that is acts of service towards our partner or healthy exercise embedded in our routine. With the moon entering Scorpio it's a good time for sex magic and shadow work.  

18th - ☾♏ Venus in Virgo opposite Neptune rx in Pisces Sun in Libra squares Saturn in Capricorn

Today may feel like it will drag on forever with the hard Sun and Saturn square bringing a dull desaturated filter to the world. We may feel restricted and burdened by our responsibilities or by authority. This may feel extra unpleasant with the new wave of Covid that may look to restrict our freedoms and make us worried about our stability. Additionally Venus will be opposite Neptune's Retrograde which is a recipe for some messiness. This could be a helpful time of reflection where we could have been seeing another person (or even more abstractly- a business, an idea or alignment of whatever) through rose-colored lenses that could be ripped away by this transit. We can finally see them for who they are and how they might have hoodwinked us in the past. On a negative side if we haven't yet learned the lesson this opposition can be the recipe for scammers or more people to come and take advantage through glamours and tricks. Be wary of your spending today, your boundaries, your CREDIT CARD INFORMATION ONLINE lol (negative Neptune transits ALWAYS brings out the scammers), and make sure to put up your wards today. It can be a day that drags on forever and may feel a bit gloomy especially with the moon still in Scorpio but you can help it go by quickly by working with the Venus and Neptune rx opposition to seeking out art that aligns with your values or spiritual beliefs. Watch films that make you feel magical or paint, draw, write, create what you love when you get a moment. If the Saturn square makes creating anything too difficult then watching a movie or favorite show can help with the escapism.

----------------------- Week 19 - 25

19th - ☾♐ Venus in Virgo trine Jupiter in Capricorn Mars rx in Aries squares Jupiter in Capricorn Ceres direct in Aquarius Moon enters Sagittarius

Though yesterday could have felt heavy, today the energy will feel Spectacular!! The mood will shift to being more lighthearted and optimistic with the moon now in shimmering Sagittarius. The jupiter energy may feel a bit more fiery and sparkling than usual with Jupiter squaring Mars rx which will only swell our inner desires and passionate emotions and drives that will need to explode outward!! If we are feeling repressed, there is no hiding that energy any longer with this volcanic transit! However to help bring some joy to this energy we have Venus in Virgo trining Jupiter bringing harmony to our values and creating luck in areas of generosity, spending time with loved ones and honoring our values and what we love. This is a day asking you to align yourself with what makes you feel most authentic. Lastly the little dwarf planet Ceres goes direct finally so we will feel that boost in areas of being nurturing and caring towards others especially in regards to our roles in our community. Now that we have took some time to nurture ourselves during it's retrograde, it's time to consider how we can contribute our support to our communities.

20th - ☾♐ Waxing Crescent Moon | Sun Sextile Moon

With the moon in Sagittarius during this waxing crescent period, it's an excellent time to experiment! Review on what you've reflected on or what intentions you've set during the new moon in Libra (aligning with our values and relationships that serve our greatest good / seeking harmony and justice and not compromise for the sake of "peace") and try out new things that align with your goals. Especially after yesterday's transits we may have a better idea of what those things are and with the moon in Sagittarius we may feel more aligned with our personal philosophies and faith. Optimistic Sagittarius will want you to expand on these ideas and experiment in any way you can!  

21st - ☾♑ Venus in Virgo trines Pluto in Capricorn Moon enters Capricorn

With the moon still in it's waxing crescent experimental phase, we may get a boost of intense and incredible energy asking us to reconnect to ourselves on a soul level. With Venus trining Pluto we get that added intensity and passion connecting us with our values on a visceral, powerful soul level. Anything that can bring us joy and satisfaction or loved ones or beliefs can be connected with on a deeply intimate level. A new relationship during this time would be very intense (great time for a soul mate), yet on a negative side this transit can give power to obsessions which we must be aware of how to curb if it goes too far. However today is an excellent day for love-attraction magic if you want something deep and intense, decorating our space to have meaning or reflect our values or express ourselves in any genuine way. This is a good time for soul-searching, attraction magic, sex magic and anything art-based.

22nd - ☾♑ Orionids Meteor Shower

With the moon in Capricorn, it's a good time for organization, addressing our tasks and responsibilities, ancestor magic, earth and mineral based magic and during the void of course, reviewing our work this cycle so far. The Orionids Meteor Shower can bring in energy from beyond to help us broaden our insight. If you catch a glimpse of a 'shooting star' make a wish!

23rd - ☾♒ Sun enters Scorpio First Quarter Moon Moon enters Aquarius

We enter the Spooky Season officially as the sun enters the dark and mysterious Scorpio. This season marks the middle of autumn where everything is starting to wither and decay, the nights are growing longer and we are feeling the chilly winds that kick up the skeletons of dead leaves. With Mercury retrograde in Scorpio still the deep underworld themes of Scorpio will feel strong as we are asked to face our inner shadows as we descend into the darkness. Today also marks the first quarter moon in Aquarius. Looking back at the New Moon in Libra we can think on the themes of us aligning with our values and people that support and reflect that as well and with the first quarter moon that theme will ask us to strategize on how we can express these unique part of ourselves as part of our roles in our community. The themes of the community may be brought to the surface with this first quarter moon and many people may want to take action, however this moon phase is best for reflection and taking that pent-up energy to strategize. There is always a time for action during the waxing gibbous phase when energies are more harmonious. If you are feeling blocked and restricted during this square it's a good time for barrier-breaking magic to dissolve any obstacles in your way. Focus on what opportunities you'd like to attract or what you need to move forward and do magic to bring that your way or break through whatever is holding you back.

24th - ☾♒ Venus in Virgo trines Saturn in Capricorn

This is an excellent day to work on your self love, self confidence and commitment to your values with Venus trining Saturn. If you have been having a rocky relationship with others it's a good time to work out the rough patches. This is also a good day for artists that may be procrastinating on work or that put a project to the side to continue building on it. Additionally it's a great day for love attraction magic (or any attraction magic with this theme: ) with a type of relationship that is long lasting, committed and reliable.

25th - ☾♓ Sun conjuncts Mercury rx in Scorpio Moon enters Pisces

The theme of our inner descent will be front and center today with the sun conjunct Mercury rx in Scorpio. It's a good time to take the day slowly, not make any serious plans and do some self reflection and shadow work. Whatever emotions that may arise we need to bring awareness to and release what no longer serves us. Especially during this time of year it's a great time to be aware of our shadows, make peace with repressed energies and release toxic beliefs that are holding us back. The day may also feel a bit melancholy with the moon's added energy entering Pisces. We may feel like we could be drowning in our darkness and the shadows of others around us. We may be more aware of others shadow selves and be influenced a little easier by their presence due to pisces's nature of dissolving boundaries. If others that are not aware of these qualities of themselves suddenly lash out today, it's best to carry some obsidian, put protective wards around yourself and keep to your safe corner.

----------------------- Week 26 - 1st

26th - ☾♓ Waxing Gibbous Moon | Sun Trine Moon

Whatever you have been reflecting on, strategizing and working on, now it's time to put those plans into action with the sun trining the moon! This aspect brings a lot of luck, harmony and magic in the mundane to spring out today. If you put plans into action, make the first move, release something new, then there is a lot of potential for great things to fall into place. If you may have been feeling blocked or frustrated on the first quarter moon, this phase may help you with new insight on how you can progress forward. If you did barrier-breaking magic to dissolve obstacles on the first quarter moon, you may see wonderful results or sudden 'open-doors' appear today. Keep on look out today for opportunities sent by the universe! Use lucky charms and glamours and send out good energy to attract it back to you.

27th - ☾♓

Today is an excellent day for rest with the moon in Pisces. There are no demanding transits and with this being the last day of the moon in this sign, there will be a void of course that will ask us to slow down and chill out. Pisces energy loves to day dream, nap and escape so it's a good day to indulge in some bath magic, take restful naps, smoke or watch something light hearted.

28th - ☾♈ Mercury retrograde enters Libra Venus enters Libra Moon enters Aries

Venus reunites with it's home sign Libra bringing the themes of harmony, partnerships, justice and values to a crescendo in this part of the cycle. Mercury rx will re-enter Libra bringing these themes to the surface of our mind as we reflect on these aspects of our lives. It's a good time for introspection in these areas, shadow work, understanding any current challenges regarding these themes for ourselves, especially as we move closer to the full moon that tends to bring out external challenges and themes with it's opposition. This day will tie back AGAIN with the initial full moon starting this month off and all of the other points and themes about our repressed energies and how we align with our values as the Moon enters Aries and creates an opposition with mercury rx in Libra. We will be able to connect dots on how our previous compromises or alignments could have repressed our true passions and energies and we may have to face sudden bursts of anger or hidden fire that we weren't aware of before, yet it could shed light on our current journey.

29th - ☾♈

When the Moon is in Aries it's a great time for channeling courage, hexing, fire-based magic and creating new things. However as this is the end of the moon's transit in Aries as it faces it's void of course which wants us to rest and reflect, it's a good time to reflect on our inner drive and our repressed emotions and how we can healthily release them. This void of course is a good time to reflect on the themes of the last full moon in Aries and how you have integrated what you've manifested into your life.

30th - ☾♉ Moon enters Taurus

With the moon in Taurus it's a great time to take things slowly and relax. It's a great time for kitchen magic, earth and plant-based magic and self-care magic.

31st - ☾♉ 🎃 HALLOWEEN  🎃 Full Moon in Taurus Sun in Scorpio opposite Uranus rx in Taurus

It's HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!! And to top it off it's a powerful Blue Moon! (A Blue Moon is a Full Moon that occurs twice in a month!) A Blue Moon is powerful showing second chances, boosted luck and new windows of opportunity so this is a fantastic time for release, casting spells, banishing or any type of magic! In this post here where I compare the sabbats to the lunar cycle, Halloween reflects that balsamic moon period where it's time to shed, banish and release, so tonight we can banish what no longer serves us and bind what seeks to strip us of our power. We may feel very inspired after this whole month of self transformation and looking at our repressed energies and what is binding us in it's brutal authority. It's time to break those barriers apart! With the Taurus full moon we are asked to look at our resources and what we value physically and if that aligns with our soul. What materialistic things or paths were we clinging on to? Do they reflect our most authentic selves? This will be brought into question and be brought to change with the Sun opposite Uranus rx (also this full moon conjunct Uranus rx) forcing us to undergo transformation which can help break old habits, old mindsets, expand our perspectives and evolve. A bit like a death and rebirth which is in theme for Halloween. With this opposition, this can bring unexpected and exciting encounters or events that will shake up our worlds. We may have to suddenly adapt to change as a new chapter and reality get brought into our lives. It could either bring havoc or freedom, however if it's something that could trigger a negative response in you, you may have to consult that shadow side and see if there is a trait you may need to let go or that is holding you back from evolving. However just to protect yourself it's always good to carry some protective charms and wards especially on a day like Halloween.

____________________

[gojosattoru]

oh my god i am so sorry, i said tropes, i meant PROMPTS lmaooooo!!! also nice, i love black and blue too, black is such a pretty color!! i like the yellow/blue combination you made in some of your colorings of nanami ^^ i think one of my favorite quotes of dabi is "this is what i call a you reap what you sow moment. come dance with your son in hell" or smth like that haha! do you have any lyrics you associate with dabi or hawks or both? i love to see edits where people associate poems +

Hahahah!! It's alright bby! XDDD no worries! The prompts I tho about them are like childhood past, family trauma, hero vs villain (like them fighting with each other), betrayal they had with each other when they were pretending to be allies to get what they wanted and I tho of something like if they were like allies? Like a universe that Hawks was a villain and was Dabi’s sidekick or the inverse! Dabi being a hero and being Hawks sidekick, I hope this made sense XD haha Ikr??? I just loooooove black!! (I'm almost 90% of the time wearing black haha) Black and blue give a awesome contrast ^^ since blue is so light and with black gives such a great vibrancy ^^ black always goes well with everything really XD Ahhh thank youu!! I really love doing edits with blues with the yellowish cream color it always look so aesthetic ^^ pastel colors I really like those too! With any color! Oh yes definitely that quote is the best of Dabi I love it!! <3333 About the songs, I have two that I really relate with Dabi and I have been thinking on doing a graphic coloring of him with one of them lolol (i'm such a lazy ass that i still didn't done lol i have the folder seating on my computer for a long time waiting). It's from Three Days Grace: The Animal I Have Become! and Skillet: Monster! They are such awesome lyrics for him, like he was once a innocent, full of energy and focus to help people on becoming a hero and with what he went through he became someone so dark, bad and corrupted! Once he wanted to save people and help them and now he doesn't mind in hurting those around him to achieve what he wants! I hope I can make the graphic one day XD I don't have any song for Hawks tbh XD I've heard so many and I still couldn't find one that goes well with him idk... do you have songs you associate with them?? Or with other characters? :D I reaaaallyyyy adore seeing graphics with quotes and songs related, it gives such a deep meaning for the character and we makes us think about it! It's such a creative way of showing how you see that character or show! ^^ Oh gosh thank you so much darling, I'm so thrilled to know you and to see your gift!! hehe I bet anything you'll make will look gorgeous! Thank you so much for taking all the info for making something for me <33333 You're so sweet hon!! *hugs you real tight* Yessss!! I celebrate!! *W* I LOVE christmas is my most fav holiday hehe ^^ Do you celebrate it too honey? Wish you a lovely day/night cutie!! <333333

[bella-spil]

Halloween

Summary: you and the avengers spend Halloween together.

Characters: Y/N (your name), Bucky, Loki, Thor, Tony, Steve, Sam, Natasha, Clint, Vision, Wanda, Peter, Shuri.

Warnings: cursing, tbh thats it.  VINE REFERENCES

Word Count: 2.4

A/N: hi.. I’m sry I haven’t written in a while.  School has been killing my creativity.  This is gonna be more of a miniseries, more like 2-3 parts.  It’s prob not gonna get much attention, but if you like it, just comment or re blog bc it helps my confidence with posting stuff on here.  This is also inspired by a meme I saw (Ill post it at the bottom of the story) and a video with Anthony Mackie and Chris Evans (link) Masterlist is here

Tag List: @sea040561 @wednesday-add-em @kmuir1 (lmk if you wanna join)

Halloween was a week away.  Tony being Tony, already paid for the decorations for the tower, so basically all of the floors look like a haunted house.  Rolls of toilet paper stretched across arches in the hallways, tiny spiders were all over furniture, bones and eyes and zombies and witches and everything in between that you could possibly think of was in the tower.  The tower looked like a zombie on steroids; creepy yet entertaining at the same time.  

Everyone was fine with the decorations, but the costumes were a big issue.  Steve and Tony kept arguing over the ideas, both of them wanting to do group costumes.  Everyone else had their ideas too, but Tony and Steve were at each other's throats for the past couple weeks, since like August.  Your room in the tower was right by the meeting office, so hearing the two of them screaming at each other for the most stupid shit was driving you insane.  Once it got to the point where you had to yell at them to shut up.  

This morning, a week before Halloween, while everyone was there, you cleared your throat while you heard Steve and Tony bickering.

“Guys this is getting to be too much.  We need to have a meeting to discuss these fucken costumes.” you said.

“Yeah this is getting out of control,” Nat agreed.

“Guys, cmon, you have to agree with me.  All of us having Iron Man suits would be awesome.  We could fly around the city all night and have so much fun!” Tony said.

“Tony, stop.  All of us being soldiers is better.”  Steve countered.

“STOP!” Clint groaned.  “You guys are insane.  We need to discuss this as a group.”

Tony and Steve sat across from each other, glaring at each other.  Death was looming between them.  

“Fine,” Tony sighed.  “When and where?”

“The office, 2pm,” Nat said.  “And everyone has to show up, that means you too Bucky.”

Bucky groaned from the other side of the room.  He hated group discussions, he liked working alone better.  Said that it was faster to be alone and you didn’t have to worry as much.

~~~

2pm finally rolled by.  Everyone has showed up in the big office, one that seemed a little too big.  Everyone was tired of the bickering and had showed up, thankfully.  

Tony, Steve, Natasha, Clint, Thor, Bucky, Sam, Peter P, Shuri, Wanda, Vision, Loki and you were crowded around the table.  Tony was standing at the end with a whiteboard, prepared to write down ideas.

“So guys, what do you want to do?” Tony said.

“What about we dress up as famous Star Wars characters?” Sam suggested.

“Nah, Steve isn’t going to know who Yoda is.  That’s a must if we do Star Wars.” Tony said.

“Devils and Angels?” Wanda said.

“Not original,” Steve said.

“What about we just wear each other’s costumes?” Thor suggested.

“You really think you are gonna wear my wings?” Sam said, a hint of annoyance in his voice that made you and Bucky snicker.

“I don’t think any of you guys want to wear a leather catsuit,” Nat said.

“We could dress up as famous vines,” Shuri offered, smirking at you and Peter.  

The three of you quoted vines daily and the rest of the team never knew what you guys meant, which made it even more fun.  Eventually, Sam, Bucky and Clint started learning vines with you because they kept saying things which you guys followed up with vine references.  The frustration got to the three men and they started to learn with you, but they weren’t nearly as attentive as you, Shuri and Peter.

“What’s a vine?” Steve asked.

“Vine was a website created in 2012, officially released in 2013.  It was ultimately shut down in 2016.  Vine was a website where users would create short videos an-” Vision said.

“Vis, I don’t think they want a whole essay,” Wanda said, seeing the reactions of the other Avengers.  Sam had started to fake snore, Loki was muttering something to Peter about knifes, and Shuri was about to watch vines, from what you could tell.  

“It’s this app filled with people saying and doing stupid things for attention,” Nat sighed.

“IT IS NOT STUPID!  VINE WAS LEGENDARY!!”  Shuri shouted.

“YOU WOULD DO THINGS FOR THE VINE, YOU UNCULTURED SWINE!!” you shrieked.

“EDUCATE YO SELF!” Clint shouted, right in Natasha’s ear.  Doing that earned him a hard punch in the back of the head.

“Well I don’t have all day so we need something,” Tony groaned, hitting his expo marker against the whiteboard.

You and everyone else was trying to come up with ideas when all the sudden, quiet Peter Parker, who was pretty much the baby of the tower, spoke up.

“Mr. Frost Giant, God sir?” Peter asked.

“Loki,” Loki sighed, pleasantly shocked.

“So, you have ice powers right?” Peter continued.

“Yes, I am an ice giant,” Loki said.

“You should be Elsa for Halloween,” Peter gasped.

Then, out of nowhere, Clint jumped up, looking like he had 5 monster energy drinks and 10 packs of warheads.

“I’LL BE MERIDA!!!” he screamed.

“I must assume that I am going to portray Elsa then,” Thor said, with a smile on his face.

“So...we are doing Disney princesses?” Tony asked, slightly confused.

“Looks like it,” Bucky said.

“Who the fuck am I gonna be?” Shuri asked.

“Language.” Steve said.

You and Shuri looked at each other for a moment and with a slight nod of your head, you were both in a song.

“FUCK SHIT PUSSY ASS!!!” you and Shuri sang.

“MOTHERFUC-” Peter started to continue, but Tony just slapped his hand over Peter’s mouth.  Tony swore that Peter wasn’t like a son to him, but this didn’t help his situation.

Steve was turning ad red as a tomato in his seat, not being able to process all the dirty words that escaped yours and Shuri’s mouths.

“Ok, who are all the Disney Princesses?” Tony asked, frustration in his voice as he looked down at Peter.  Tony gave him a look, one that said “Stop this shit or you get your suit taken away for two weeks” and once Peter nodded his head slightly, Tony removed his hand.

Vision started to list a bunch of them off, even some of the ones that aren’t considered princesses, like Megara, Alice and Jane.  Once Tony had a list of all the princesses, he started to write of all the avengers, making lines to match them up with their character.  

“Ok, who wants to find their Disney princess counterpart first?” Tony asked.

“Me, I already asked before,” Shuri said rolling her eyes.

“Well I mean you already are a princess.” you said.

“Oh,” Shuri said. “I don’t have to dress up then.  Haha.  You can cross my name off, Tony.”

Tony sighed and rolled his eyes, while taking her name off.

“Next?” he sighed.

“What about me?” Steve asked.

“Oh this is gonna be interesting.” Sam grinned.

“Snow White.” Bucky said, without even hesitating.

“Wait why?” you asked.

“Ohhhhh, I think I see why,” Wanda smirked.

“Continue Barnes,” Natasha said.

“First of all, Snow White was the very first princess to come out.  She came out in the thirties or forties.  She’s the oldest.  Steve was the first avenger and he is the oldest.”  Bucky said.

“Bucky, you are a couple months older than me.” Steve countered.

“Second,” Bucky continued, ignoring his friend completely.  “She is like the most gullible and is surrounded by followers.  Snow White was like living with seven dwarfs.  And she was underage and just lived with them. Steve here, was the leader of the Howling Commandos.  And I was in that group, so I had to endure him and his stupid ass decisions, but I couldn’t elect to ignore it.”

“That’s offensive,” Steve said.

“That's the point,” Bucky said.  

“Ok so Steve is Snow White.”  Tony declared, making a line between Snow White and Steve on the whiteboard.  “NEXTT!”

“Me,” said the super secret Russian spy.

“Hmm..” you thought.

“Megara,” said Clint.

“Oh that's a good one,” Sam agreed.

“Who is Megara?” Steve asked.

“She is an attractive Greek lady that Hercules, the son of Zeus, who is the King of the Greek Gods, falls in love with.” Thor explained.

“Thor, how do you of all people know that?” Shuri asked.  “Shouldn’t Vision know all of these things?”

“M’lady, I am formally educated in Disney movies by the request of Peter Parker, also known as ‘The One and Only Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman’.” Thor explained.

“Kid, you make Thor, the God of Thunder, sit through Sleeping Beauty?” Tony asked, shocked.

“My dear man of Iron, Sleeping beauty was quite relaxing.  That Prince Philip, that amazing man, demonstrated quite intellectually advanced ways to use a sword.  Ways that I can use Storm-breaker effectively in battle.” Thor smiled.

Tony and Sam shared a look of disgust with a combination of interest and concern.

“Thor, I don’t think you can learn fighting tactics from a cart-” Vision started.

“I need to watch the movies again,” Clint and Bucky muttered under their breaths.

“No she should be Mulan,” Wanda said.  “Mulan is determined and strong.  Megara just messed with the God of Death.”

“I mess with death all the time,” Natasha countered.

“I should be Megara.” Bucky stated.

“Because you almost died?” Steve asked.

“Because your soul is dark and empty?” Sam asked.

“Yes and no.  My hair is long, not as long as her’s but I can make it work.  Hair extensions.  She plays with Hercules’ emotions.  She is also strong and independent.  Like me.” Bucky explained.

“That settles it.  Bucky is Megara and Natasha is Mulan.”  Tony said, making lines between the two avengers and their princesses.  

“nEXXttT!” Tony shouted.

“Me me me!” Wanda said happily.

“Yes Mr. Stark I would like to go as well.” Vision added.

“Wanda would make the perfect Moana.” Thor said.  “Moana and Wanda both demonstrate very strong emotions, which affect their abilities regarding their powers and limits and they care deeply about the people that mean the most to them.”

He nudged Loki in the shoulder to try to get him more involved in the meeting.  Loki was just throwing his knives up in the air, and Peter was getting very interested, and getting dangerously close to the God of Mischief.  Tony was eyeing the two of them very, very carefully.

“Yeah, yeah sure,” Loki sighed, just going along with Thor or the sake of it.

“Who would Vision be then?” Sam asked.

“He could be the dead grandma,” Clint suggested.

“Yeah, that one that turned into the manta ray.” Nat agreed.

“It’s settled.  Moana and Dead Grandma Ray.” Tony said, making the lines once again.  He had to add “dead grandma” to the board for Vision’s sake.

“NeXXXXXtttT!!” he shrieked.

“Tony, you should be Belle,” Natasha said.

“Yeah.  I mean, they both fall in love and save the people that mean the most to them, even if it means putting their own life at risk.” Steve agreed.

“And they are both really smart.” Peter added.

“Peter, you just had to say that and I would have been on board.  Now I had to listen to Steve and Natasha for a minute.” Tony groaned as he drew a line between his name and Belle’s.

“Thanks Tony,” Steve said sarcastically.

“Your welcome, Capsicle.” Tony gleamed back.

“Sam should be Cinderella.” Bucky said.

“OMG that works!!” Shuri exclaimed.

“Yeah..” Sam realized.  “I’m Cinderella ‘cause she broke, homie.”

“Yeah,” Steve said, smiling from ear to ear, looking back at Sam.

“She represent me, yooo,” Sam said.  Then he looked over at Steve and said, “Lemme borrow twenty dollas.”

By this point, Steve couldn’t hold in the laughter and almost fell out of his chair.  And Sam, being as he called it “Steve’s best friend, better than Bucky,” saved Steve from collapsing on to the floor.

“Steve is the cinder princess.  Deal with it.” Tony declared, adding another line.

“NeeXXttTTT!” Tony screamed.

“Now, all that’s left is Peter and Y/N,” Wanda said, eyeing you two.

“Peter should be Rapunzel.  Before they face the real world, they are both innocent, but then when they see what the world is really like, it changes them.” Thor said, analyzing the similarities between the princess and the superhero.

“Jesus Christ, why is Point break actually really on point?” Tony asked.

“My dear Stalk of corn, I am educated like I told you earlier.  Insect man has really helped me tap into my inner child and all of the pain my demon brother made me endure.” Thor said.

“Spiderman,” Peter mumbled.

“I take that as a complement.” Loki stated, out of the blue.

“Rapunzel is Parker.” Tony declared.

“Last but not least, Y/N.” Steve said.

Now, it took everyone a while to come up with a princess for you.  You didn’t fit the exact mold or looks of a certain princess, so it was definitely harder.

“What about Alice?” Sam said/

“Why the fuck would she be Alice?” Bucky asked.

“Because Alice in Wonderland is supposed to portray the effects of drugs.” Sam explained.

“So your saying that I act like a drug addict?” you asked.

“NO!” Sam shouted.

“Sam, drop it before you dig your own grave.” Steve said.

“What about Jasmine?” offered Wanda.  “You have a very free spirit like her, and she’s your favorite princess.”

“Yeah sure, that sounds fine.” you agreed.

“Y/N is Jasmine!  dOOONNEe!” Tony shouted with relief.

“WAIT I CHANGED MY MIND!” Shuri shrieked.  “I WANNA BE A PRINCESS.  I WANNA BE TIANA SHE IS AN ABSOLUTE BADASS!”

“FINE!” Tony shouted back.  “NOW WE ARE DONE.  EVERYONE HAPPY?”

Everyone in the room, not wanting to disagree with a hot-headed Tony, looked around at each other and slowly nodded their heads.

“Great!” Tony smiled, a complete change in moods.  “Tomorrow we are going to Party City to get our costumes.  Everyone in this room has to come so we can get the wigs and dresses and makeup.  No skipping out.  That includes you Clint, Bucky and Loki.”

The three men who were called out rolled their heads and sighed.  But they agreed to go.  To Tony’s happiness.

“Great.  Meeting finished.  Pepper wants me for something.  Probably for the party.  Nobody try to call me or you will be met with an ear rape of AC/DC.” Tony said, putting on his glasses and promptly leaving the room in Stark fashion.  Everyone eventually left the room, you being lost in your thoughts.  

“You coming, doll?” Bucky asked, seeing you were still sitting in the room.

“Ya, I’ll be out in a second.” you said.  

“Alright, you, me and Clint are doing a Disney marathon for fighting tactics.  Don’t be late or you because we are gonna eat all the food.  I don’t wanna hear you complain.” Bucky said, walking out the door with a lazy drag of his legs.

Now, relief filled your body.  Now you wouldn’t have to hear arguing about costumes!  And they actually agreed to costumes, shockingly.  Now you just couldn’t wait to go to Party City and endure all the chaos.  And then, you left the room to watch Disney movies again, for fighting tactics.  

Oh, the chaos that awaits.  

[currywaifu]

𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: angelica flower 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩: miyoshi kazunari/reader 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: sfw 𝐰𝐜: 1.1k words 𝐝𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨: Cerise 🍡 

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: kazunari is a regular at the flower shop cafe reader works at, and he is in need of inspiration 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: this work is a part of the flower shop event, a series of unconnected flower shop AU one-shots

The sound of the storefront door swinging open and a shout of your name indicated the arrival of your favourite regular customer.

“Heyho! You look cute today too piko☆” and if you weren’t already convinced, the cheeriness present as ever combined with his catchphrase solidified the man’s identity.

You turned around to greet him properly, somewhat surprised to find him standing alone. Weeks ago you would have been too timid to even talk to him outside of

“Kazunari-kun, you didn’t bring anyone with you today?” you asked, “it’s kinda weird seeing you alone.”

“Nyahaha! It just means I can spend more time talking to you one-on-one~♪” Kazunari said, a boisterous laugh escaping his mouth, a wider smile at the sight of reddening ears going unnoticed, before he answered you more seriously, “I have a sketch to do for class, but I keep getting distracted.”

You nodded understandingly. It was always hard for you to concentrate in a noisy place, so you understood his dilemma.

“Do wanna sit somewhere more secluded?” you pointed somewhere towards the back of the shop, “it’s usually where I stay when it’s not my shift, or if I’m, like, studying for class.”

“Woah! Special friendship perks?! Is this what you get when you’re BFFs with someone from the littest flower shop slash cafe slash totes aesthetic hang in Veludo?” he exclaimed, and you didn’t bother suppressing the laughter that he caused.

“I mean, technically anyone could sit there?” you pointed out with a giggle, but you left your spot from behind the counter to usher him there. “If you wanna get cosy, I’ll show you the best place to sit,” you offered, smiling as Kazunari cheered excitedly, almost bouncing like a cute puppy.

You led him to a table with a comfy loveseat, positioned beside a window that probably would’ve brought a glare of sunlight to the interior if it wasn’t a little late in the afternoon already. Unsurprisingly, he dives onto the armchair immediately; his bag of what you’ve come to know contained art supplies following suit.

“Nice, right?”

“Uhhh, hell yeah!” Kazunari sunk a little deeper into the chair, about to continue talking until you heard the store door open.

“Big OOF, you better—“

“Yeah, oh gosh, I haven’t even gotten your order yet?” you said a little hastily, “you going for the daily special cake again? With the complementary—“

“Yep yep! You know my tastes so well piko☆” he said with a grin, before shooing you off, “now go! You don’t want the chef to come out and scold you again~♪”

You laughed as you quickly ran back to the counter to entertain your new customer’s order, watching from the corner of your eye as Kazunari brought out his art supplies. You silently wished him well.

…

Your shift was nearly ending, and as the sky dawned a palette of pastel pinks and purples, the business and idle chatter of the shop settled down. Save for the “Cafe Music! Jazz & Bossa Nova instrumental music” YouTube playlist in the background, all was quiet.

Well, save for the sound of pencils against rustling paper from the back.

Knowing he would be too focused to spare you a glance, you peeked at him from your spot by the counter. When Kazunari was in work mode, he gave off a totally different vibe— and while on normal circumstances you’d think this side of his was just as charming, something was off based on his furrowed brows and the barely noticeable frown on his face.

After a second thought, you opened a cabinet behind you and got a small jar of candies. You usually reserved them for yourself throughout the times you needed some sugar for energy, but you figured Kazunari needed some more than you at the moment.

You knew he liked candy, so if you couldn’t help him with his work you could at least support him somehow!

“Kazunari-kun, how are you?” you asked, situating yourself beside his chair. With a small groan, he angled his sketchbook to let you look at it properly.

While you haven’t seen a lot of Kazunari’s stuff, you knew he was amazingly talented in multiple art mediums— be it traditional or graphic or anything else in the spectrum. Looking at what he drew so far, you could say that the idea and technique were definitely there, but it was a little lacking save for the centre of the page.

Kazunari clearly knew it, too.

“I’m Gucci mostly, but I think something’s off?” The blond said, “like a missing detail to make it less plain? Idk tbh.”

You pouted. You didn’t know what to add either, so instead you proceeded with your plan and showed him the small jar of candy.

“Sorry, I don’t know what I’d add personally, but I just wanted to give you something to…” you trailed off until you could phrase the rest of your sentence in a logical manner, quickly giving up on that. “Haha, I guess I just wanted to support you somehow?”

“Eh? You remembered that I loved candy?!” Kazunari exclaimed, immediately perking back up from his minor slump. “You’re so cute~! High-key lit! No, totes the GOAT!” His hand touched yours, the jar still on your palm as he opened the lid.

He immediately went for the green one, and you nearly laughed at how similar it was to his eye colour. As soon as he popped it in his mouth, the same bright eyes widened at you.

“Yo, this tastes funky— but I’m kinda digging it?” he said, continuing to figure out the flavour, “what is this?”

“It’s called candied angelicas,” you said, “we got a delivery of angelica flowers a few days ago, and apparently you can make candies out of the stem?”

“Angelica flowers?” Kazunari repeated, reaching to get another piece of candy, “never heard of her. She could be walking down the street, I wouldn’t know a thing. Sorry to this flower.”

You giggled, reaching into the jar to get a piece yourself, “You dummy! Apparently they mean inspiration and encouragement, so it’d be nice flowers to give~”

The blond gasped, grabbing your shoulders and shaking you in excitement.

“Wait, that might just work!!!”

“What- what’s gonna work?” you asked in confusion, watching him set down his art materials. He stood up so quickly you would wonder how he didn’t get whiplash if he didn’t immediately squeeze you in a tight hug.

What?

Though it had only been 5 seconds tops, him pulling away felt like minutes as he rewarded you with the brightest grin you’ve seen from him today.

“Ugh, you’re actually so??? The best??? I’m totally pumped up and inspired now!”

Well, maybe you didn’t have to understand right away. You were just glad you were able to help him.

“ thank you for your hard work today at the flower shop! here, feel free to take home these angelica flowers with you~ ”

【 angelica flowers 】 inspiration, creativity, encouragement

“ maybe you’d like some more flowers before heading home? ”

-ˋˏflower shop masterlistˎˊ- |  -ˋˏfic masterlistˎˊ-

[betweenthetimeandsound]

Three Minutes to Eternity: My ESC 250 (#160-151)

(Author's note: Sorry about it being a couple of days late--I wanted to rest a bit--which I will do again because we hit the top 150--and had to download quite a bit for the gifs. Please enjoy this bunch, though!)

#160: Dihaj -- Skeletons (Azerbaijan 2017)

“When we hook up it’s fantasy We’re just like alchemy I’ve never been so ready”

I completely neglected Skeletons during the contest, as I didn't listen to it beforehand and didn't watch songs 12-17 when watching the grand final live. Along with "Grab the Moment" that year, it sandwiched a horrendous stretch of songs in #13-16.

Despite this, I listened to it a lot afterwards. It’s equal parts intriguing and mysterious, especially with the almost-nonsensical lyrics with interesting images. I always imagined a concept film in which the main character meets a potential love interest in a night club, only to go too far and almost kill him.

The atmosphere the staging created was a bit strange, in that it incorporates masks and a world inside a school chalkboard. For each of these aspects, Skeletons is my favorite Azeri entry ever—it stands out in a unique way because of its eccentricity.

Personal ranking: 5th/42 Actual ranking: 14th/26 GF in Kyiv

#159: Tommy Seebach -- Disco Tango (Denmark 1979)

“Hun er en stjerne på et dansegulv Slår John Travolta i en rock ‘n’ roll På diskoteket ta’r hun kegler, og der ka’ man se Dem stå i kø og skæve, hver gang hun gør sin entré”

“She’s a star on a dance floor Beats John Travolta in a rock ‘n’ roll At the disco she’s scoring, and there you see Them queue up with an eye on her, every time she enters”

Disco and tango are two genres you don’t expect to work together, despite them being so fun to dance to. Despite this, Tommy Seebach makes it sound natural. There’s a bit of adjustment needed when listening to it, but it’s equally flirty and groovy all at once, as one gets to know the many quirks of the song.

The live performance definitely elevates it--not only with Debbie Cameron's enthusiasm (she would come back two years later with Tommy in a bigger part), but also because of the orchestration. The mix with strings and castanets in the chorus was definitely the best part and gets me shaking.

It’s different for Denmark, but definitely a song you should put in a disco (*clap clap*) from time to time!

Personal ranking: 3rd/19 Actual ranking: 6th/19 in Jerusalem

#158: Poli Genova -- If Love (Were) a Crime (Bulgaria 2016)

“Unafraid, never fade When it’s dark we illuminate”

Bulgaria’s comeback after a two-year hiatus sees them with a hyper energetic pop song with an uplifting message. While it seems like a simple one at first, the diverse Eurovision community can embrace it for its openness and determination. The great production upholds this gem, and the lighting on stage adds to it, especially in the end.

Poli definitely makes this song come to life with her vocals and her upbeat personality, making it shine even more! (And I did like her costume--not something for everyday-wear, but definitely one fitting the song and a bit avant--garde too). Compared to her first entry, which fights against those who put her down in a pop-rock way, she delivers with fun.

And they got their first qualification in nine years and a start to a nice run of entries as a result.

Personal ranking: 5th/42 Actual ranking: 4th/42 GF in Stockholm

#157: Athena -- For Real (Turkey 2004)

“All I know is you don’t want to be part of the crowd Realise yourself You say it but don’t feel it, what you sayin’ has no meanin’ Don’t hide your soul”

For their host entry, Turkey brings upon Athena, a ska-punk (and former metalcore) band with this bouncy song. And it’s such a great one—filled with energy and fun. A bit different from what we expect from Turkey, but it shows what their music industry could bring.

It's lively and fun, with Gokhan leading the charge with his presence. At times, he shouts more than he sings and it seems like he didn't dress up for a more formal event. That said, there's still a lot of charm in "For Real's" performance, ranging from the sharks in the background to the "Hi mom!" and the peace jacket. It comes along in an eccentric package, and makes for a solid predecessor to their rock-based entries four years later.

And it definitely hints at being oneself, which celebrates individuality in a fun way.

(Plus, that's the reason why my top three in 2004 isn't the actual top three. Haha)

Personal ranking: 3rd/36 Actual ranking: 4th/24 in Istanbul

#156: Katarína Hasprová - Modlitba (Slovakia 1998)

“Láska kráčam údolím sĺz A len ty môžeš zmierniť môj žiaľ Túžim sa dotknúť tvojich pier, tvojich rúk Prosím vráť sa mi, nevzdaj sa nás”

“Love, I am walking the valley of tears Only you can get me out of misery I long to touch your hands, your lips Please, come back, do not give up”

A comment on the interwebs suggested anybody who has Horehronie as their favorite Slovak entry has never listened to this. I could understand why people would gravitate towards the former, but this stands out more for me (and not just because of the religious title).

The introduction reminds me of “Kiss From a Rose”, which here, is less meant to be about plagiarism and more about the 1990s feel of it. Musically, it takes the same medieval elements from other 1990s entries, but it tells a different story, one about trying to fix a relationship on the rocks. It builds well, going from an otherwise delicate ballad to something more explosive when one gets into the chorus. The orchestration really helps it too!

Modlitba got six points from Croatia...and then nothing else. It's still a shame it did so poorly, but as a potential nul-pointer too? Sad.

Personal ranking: 4th/25 Actual ranking: 21st/25 in Birmingham

#155: Melovin -- Under the Ladder (Ukraine 2018)

“Nothing but your will sets you on fire Fire lasts forever...”

The song that inspired a fervor from Melovin’s fans, including me! While I’m not as enthusiastic as them, I still love this song—it's pulsating and intense, with quite interesting lyrics about getting up again(with some enunciation issues). There was a point where the song got a musical revamp, and I feared it would make the song worse, but fortunately it kept the whole thing intact with a few production changes.

Melovin proves he's a talented showman, and seeing the stairs go aflame made me smile (even though I preferred the effect more on his Vidbir performance; the flaming LEDs really helped there). Good thing the televote swooped in, because last place in the jury vote feels really wrong (though it could be because of said pronunciation).

Plus he has some good post-Eurovision songs—check them out! My favorite is З тобою, зі мною, і годі.

Personal ranking: 6th/43 Actual ranking: 17th/26 GF in Lisbon

#154: Joci Papai -- Origo (Hungary 2017)

“Be kell csuknod a szemed Úgy láthatsz meg engemet Hogy meghódítsd a szívem Ismerned kell lelkemet”

“You need to close your eyes So you can see me To conquer my heart You have to know my soul”

While Az en apam (#240) touches me more than Origo, one can’t deny this is the more creative song. It combines not only Romani influences, but also a dark pop foreground which allows them to shine.

In addition, the lyrics are absolutely masterful—they are rooted in Joci’s story and packs a punch in the message. It's tells of a relationship with someone who doesn't accept him for who he is (cursing her forever as a result), along with how Joci grew up and used music as a weapon for himself and his people. He's a compelling storyteller, and you can tell he sings it from the soul.

Combined with a compelling rap and a neat violin instrumental, you get a completely unique experience.

Personal ranking: 4th/42 Actual ranking: 8th/26 GF in Kyiv

#153: Blanche -- City Lights (Belgium 2017)

“All alone in the danger zone Are you ready to take my hand?”

Blanche had quite the journey in Eurovision--first her song gets released, and immediately becomes a contender. Then she has problems performing in shows and during rehearsals, at which the odds star dropping like flies. Then her semi-final performance was notably wobbly, but she still qualifies and places fourth.

Despite the staging errors (I would've personally have made the lighting gold rather than natural-colored), it was fully deserved and I think it was better than the eventual top three.

The vibe of this song reminds me of walking down the streets of Tokyo, because of the visuals involved. Everything is in a rush, but one's not sure There’s also tension, because of the dark electronic sound that dominates it. Despite Blanche’s nervousness on stage, it worked well with the song—it amplified the sensation of walking down a wire and wondering if the relationship will work. A startling entry from Belgium and one that really strikes at modernity.

Personal ranking: 3rd/42 Actual ranking: 4th/26 GF in Kyiv

#152: Frances Ruffelle -- We Will Be Free (Lonely Symphony) (United Kingdom 1994)

“Welcome to the land Where all our dreams are planned And fighting is a thing to do...”

The first of the UK’s attempts to modernize the contest in the 1990s, it’s a cool, funky song with interestingly-written lyrics. Someone compared the chorus to a protest slogan for social justice movement, but the rest of the song discusses a complex relationship. The opening lines are a highlight in particular, and everything flows fantastically.

A few bits of the live-performance went out of hand, like with the orchestration and Frances’ vocals, explained by how she was bopping up and down and was told that she needed to keep that down. As a result, she couldn't focus on her vocals and they turned out a bit sharp at times.

That said, she had a pretty dress and charming look about her. And while it placed in the top ten, I think it should've done better.

Personal ranking: 4th/25 Actual ranking: 10th/25 in Dublin

#151: Sebalter -- Hunter of Stars (Switzerland 2014)

"I state my heart has been well trained I’m gonna be your candidate I am the hunter and you are the prey Tonight I’m gonna eat you up"

This word-salad of a song makes it quite hard to choose a good lyric, as it has a bunch of nice lines but almost no meaning to them. Reading them again, it seems like one is trying to get his affections to like him, to no avail, unfortunately.

But beyond that, we get a fun and wholesome song, which features a prominent banjo and even a violin solo! From the opening melody I can't help but smile, or even whistle along at points (everytime the latter synchronizes, I feel a bit of accomplishment). It's a bit more folksy than what the contest oriented on the time (slickly produced pop with a bit of dubstep), which makes it even more special.

Finally, we have Sebalter himself, who really carries his own song! Not only is he quite good-looking, but also very charismatic and knows how to have a good time. While Swiss entries have become better known since then, you can't replicate Hunter of Stars; it's too special!

Personal ranking: 5th/37 Actual ranking: 13th/26 GF in Copenhagen

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #309

“show me how to lie - you’re getting better all the time  /  and turning all against one is an art that’s hard to teach.”

Have you ever played Jackbox Games? If so, which ones of their party games are your favorites? No, but I looooove watching Mark and The Boys play them on charity streams. They can make up the funniest shit. I can't recall the name of the specific one I'm thinking of... but I enjoy watching most of them. I do think one or two are boring, though. Do you have artistic friends? If so, have you got their artwork displayed? I have some very talented friends, but I don't have anything of theirs displayed somewhere. Have you ever considered pole dancing? Why/why not? No. It takes an incredible amount of strength, plus confidence I don't have. That and I'm just not into it. What's the last thing you fixed yourself? Uhhhhhhh bitch I couldn't tell ya. Are there any CDs you've held onto for sentimental reasons? No. Did you read the Barbie magazines with comics made with the actual dolls? "I didn’t know that was a real thing." <<<< Me either. What's the last thing you knitted? I've never knitted before. Who was your first online friend? Emma. :') She was the first person who joined my RP mob back in the Animal Planet forum days. Why do you take surveys? Be honest. Boredom, distraction, and sometimes I just wanna ramble about whatever. Does mail get delivered to your door or do you have a mailbox outside? Our mailbox is by the side of the road at the end of our driveway. Your doorbell rings out of the blue. What's your reaction? Let Mom answer it. I don't answer the door ever if I don't expect someone or can peek outside and don't recognize them. Are all the lamps in your home LED or other energy saving lights? I don't know. Do you prefer writing by hand or typing? Typing. I can't write very long at all before my carpal tunnel flares up. Think of one of the biggest decisions you've had to make in your life...If you made a different choice, how different would your life be now? I'd be dead, that simple. Have you ever taken a course on CPR? No. What makes you laugh most effortlessly? You can guess it pretty easily. What makes you cry most effortlessly? I make it a rule that I "can't" listen to "Eternally Yours" by Motionless In White because there hasn't been even ONE occasion where it hasn't made me cry, even when I was stupid enough to binge it because it's just a good song. I've broken that "rule" before because I do just genuinely enjoy the song, but I know the pain truly isn't worth it, so I haven't heard it in a decently long time. What is the best smell in the whole world? Cinnamon rolls, probably. My body wash is currently that kind of smell, and Jesus Christ it's the best part of showering. Do you wear a watch? No. Can you tell time from an analog clock? Yes. What a time it'll be when kids can't anymore... Is there a number or a combination of numbers that feels important to you? Only dates, but not numbers themselves. What is the most socially awkward thing you've done? *gestures at my life as a whole* Is your computer decorated in any way? No. If your old class was to have a reunion, would you attend it? No. No. I don't want to relive my high school experience; it would be too painful for me to willingly walk into. What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you? I would say "the breakup," but technically it was letting him basically own me and my every neuron of joy. Not by his will of course, but my own. I was stupid and just... handed those rights over without really realizing it. I can harp forever and ever and EVER about the importance of making sure you own yourself and your emotions. Do you ever donate money to charity? If so, which charity and why? Blah blah blah, I don't get an income, you know this. Whenever I do, I 100% plan on donating to every charity stream Mark ever hosts again, as well as some other people's. I'd love to donate to a lot of places. Would you ever want to get married? If so, why? Yes, because society has made it too instilled in me that it's just like... this ultimate validation of "forever" with your partner, even though I know you can be just as or even far more invested in your relationship without marriage. The only *true* benefit of marriage imo is for legal and financial reasons, but yeah, I still want it. Like I said, it's too deeply embedded in that brain of mine that it's a relationship goal. Why do you live the way you do? I'm not even living the way I want to, so... Have you ever abused an animal? No, and I say "fuck you" with every ounce of sincerity and loathing if you have. Do you think animals are less important than humans? If so, why? Nope. We share this earth and grew from the same roots, so what *really* makes us better? We might be smarter (generally) and more developed as the apex predator, but that does not equate to being more important than, say, even a gnat. That creature has the exact same level of rights to be here as the human species does. I could go on and on and on about this topic. How close was the last person close to you who has died? Not extremely, but she was still important to and loved by me. Grandma and I were very, very different and butted heads more than once, but her love was unconditional, and she showed boundless kindness to others. She showed a courage I see as unmatched in the face of death. I truly, deeply, in the very core of my heart hope she is at peace and experiencing all joys she ever wished for. How does death in general make you feel? Well, it depends on how I'm looking at it. I fully accept it is an inevitable phase in simply existing that none of us will ever evade, so it's not exactly terrifying to me, though of course I don't want it anytime soon. If I'm thinking about people I love dying, I definitely get sad about it and scared of that possibly eternal separation. Is there a person you absolutely loathe? If so, why do you loathe them? Not that I know personally, no. Has anyone ever told you that you're rude? If so, what caused it? No; I think I'm very mannerly, honestly. Have you ever seen a therapist? I've regularly seen therapists since I started middle school. I advocate for everyone to have one, honestly, whether you have a mental illness or not. Have you ever been homeless? In technical terms, yes, but a friend let me stay with her until Mom and I settled into a new place. Have you ever been completely broke? That's the actual story of my life. Well, not me personally considering I've never had to take care of myself financially, but my mom struggles very, very badly with this, and mind you, she's frugal. Just disgustingly underpaid when she worked, and her current status with disability isn't exactly incredibly generous. I live under her roof, so. Have you ever had a steady job? No. Have you ever needed a loan? If so, what for? Have you paid it back? Yes, for school, and no. I do NOT want to know how in debt I am with schools. Have you ever wanted to go to space? Not seriously, no. What's the weirdest thing you've ever seen or heard? I am 99.99% sure mine and Jason's old roommates were having some ~kinky~ sex once while I was alone on the couch against their bedroom. Preeeetty sure the girl was making meowing sounds. They were furries (who I want to emphasize have zero judgment from me; I actually think they're very brave and creative), so that was... something I definitely wasn't used to hearing, haha. What has been the most exciting moment of your life thus far? Probably when Mark N O T I C E D me on Tumblr by reblogging a gif I made of him and his pupper, and I LITERALLY struggled to sleep for three days lmfaoooo. How many birds can you name just by looking at them? Uhhhh a pretty decent amount, I'd say. Which birds are most common around your neighborhood? Crows, sparrows, cardinals and bluejays if you're lucky, robins... pretty basic stuff like that. What do you think is the most interesting sea creature? Octopi are absolutely fascinating with their intelligence. How do you reset your head to zero, so to speak? Take a nap. That usually works. Have you ever gone exploring an abandoned building? Yeah, I love that shit and really wish I could do it more. Bring my camera, too. Are there any foreign television shows you enjoy watching? Some animes. Do you have any clocks in your house that chime when the hour changes? Do those types of clocks annoy you? No. I actually quite like them, though. Has anyone ever let you borrow some of their music, promising you'd love it, but you really didn't? Did you lie to the person and agree, or tell the truth, that you hated it? My dad lent me his Shinedown CD once clearly without thinking I could just look up the album online, haha... He's an old clueless man, leave 'im be. But anyway, of course I listened to it for him and I enjoyed it; I especially loved "The Human Radio," "Kill Your Conscience" and "Pyro." Have you had the same doctor pretty much your whole life, or have you went to a bunch of different ones over the years? Have you ever been to the doctor thinking something was horribly wrong with you, but it turned out to be something minor? Mine has changed a few times, but I haven't had "a bunch." As for the second question, not to my recollection. Is the background on your phone a default picture, or a picture you took? What is the picture of? The lock screen is a pastel-styled list of mental health reminders: "i am strong, i am loved, i am enough." My home screen has been some adorable meerkat pups for a while, which I didn't take. What is your favorite type of print (ex: zebra, stripes, argyle)? Do you have a lot of things with this print on it? Ummmm maybe plaid? No. Are there any stores you feel uncomfortable going into (ex: if you dress girly, do you feel uncomfortable going into Hot Topic)? Are there any stores that you refuse, or just never go in to? The only situation I could think of would be a sex shop. That'd be so fuckin uncomfortable. What is your favorite brand of clothing? Is this a brand that is sort of expensive, or is it pretty affordable? I'm heavily biased towards Cloak, haha. I just support anything and everything Mark takes part it, and it's his and jacksepticeye's business. I have one shirt and it's genuinely great quality and reall comfy. I wouldn't call its products expensive, but they're not cheap, either. What person do you text the most? My mom or Sara, depending on the day. Do you have any pictures that always make you laugh, or cry? Are they digital pictures, or printed pictures? What is the significance? No. Not pictures I have anymore, at least. Have you ever eaten raw pumpkin? Omg I would never. I hate the flavor of any sort of pumpkin food. Does your car have a name? I don't have my own car, but Mom jokingly calls hers "Olivia." Who was the last person you made plans with? One of my sister's in-laws that's actually the mother of one of my closest friends contacted me to plan some family pictures. What is the rudest thing someone has done recently towards you? I can't think of anything recent. How do you feel about your hair right now? It needs to be trimmed and dyed. How fast have you driven a car? I think accidentally leaning towards 80 on a highway. When you're hanging out with friends + you become bored, do you just leave or endure the boredom? Given I can't leave without a car, I deal with it. What did you last plug into your computer? What were you doing with this? The charger for obvious reasons. What color(s) have you dyed your hair? Red, purple, black, then red, purple, and lighter brown highlights. I really wish I could dye it more and actually have the color stick... Was your first kiss perfect? It was to me. What song did you hear last? I have "Over The Mountain" by Ozzy on now. (: Does anyone have any blackmail on you? No. Have you ever walked into the guys' bathroom? HA, once during a teacher work day (my mom was an assistant) at my elementary school. My sisters and friends went in there to be little "rebels." I remember being mega confused with urinals, haha. Then as a teen and adult, I've been in the dance studio's boy's restroom as well as a church's to help Mom clean. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My therapist. Are you shy? I am VERY shy. Are you talkative? Generally, no, but when I'm in a very good mood, I tend to be. Has your most recent ex ever seen you cry? Oh jeez, she saw me wail once. When was the last time you were called "cute"? I'm not sure. Would you rather be called "hot", "cute" or "beautiful"? "Beautiful." Do you have a little sister? Yep. Definitely not "little" anymore, though. About to have her Master's in social work... How many arguments have you had with the last person you kissed? Given our childhood, we've fought a lot, but mostly just as kids over very, very stupid things. As adults, we've had a serious argument once or twice and then just some very minor disagreements sprinkled in there. Do you know anyone who's been arrested? Oh yes. What're you planning on doing after this? Another survey. What time did you go to sleep last night? Damn, it wasn't even 8:00. I was EXHAUSTED and actually slept decently for once in my life. Do you like waking up to good morning texts in the morning? I mean, I'd think most people would. It's a sweet, easy way of someone showing they care and think about you. Have you left some things unsaid with a certain person? Yeah. What was the last thing that made you happy? We had syrup to add to my breakfast, haha. I don't know if these are a thing everywhere, but I looove what we just call "pancakes on a stick," which is like a corndog, but with sausage and pancake batter. Dipping it in syrup is amaaaaaaziiiiiiing. Do you like the smell of rain? I don't love it, but it's refreshing sometimes. It's mostly just associated with a bittersweet memory, so it can be triggering to smell. I know, that sounds immensely stupid. What was the last thing you took a picture of? A very, very relatable meme to show Sara, haha. She doesn't have a Facebook, so that'll do. When you go to McDonald's, what drink do you usually get? I always get a Coke. What’s the nickname of your home state? Tar Heel State, from discovering tar in the since aptly-named Tar River. Have you ever thought about your wedding? I mean duh. What’s the worse type of weather in your opinion? Hot and humid, ugh. Especially right after a summer afternoon thunderstorm. It's unbearable. You can't fucking breathe outside, and you set one foot out of the door and it's soaked. Do you have a Kindle or iPad or neither? Neither. Would you rather read or write? Write. When was the last time someone took a picture of you? The time Misty visited last month and we were taking family pictures. Would you rather see Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood in concert? I wouldn't pay for either or even willingly go to one or the other, but if I had to go for whatever reason, Carrie. She has a beautiful voice as well as a good handful of songs I actually like. I'm not a Taylor fan; there are only like, two old songs by her I enjoy. When someone screws you over, do you get back with revenge? No. I may not be the best at adulting, but damn, I'm not that bad. Name something negative that you hate about yourself? I overthink like a motherfucker. About everything. Is there a dead end road near where you live? I live on one. Huh, that's actually been the case three times... wow. Four if you count the apartment. Who are you tired of seeing in the news a lot (celebrities)? I don't care. I don't even pay attention to the news, other than Covid updates. Have you ever had to call and complain about a product you bought? No. Name something positive you love about yourself: I care a lot about people. Can you smell anything right now? No, besides however my house naturally smells that I'm numb to. Have you spoken to a relative on the phone today? No. How does alcohol affect you? I flush in my face very obviously, and I become more outgoing and talkative. Have you ever eaten tofu and if so, did you enjoy it? I've never tried it, but I very much doubt I'd enjoy it. What was the last type of meat you ate? Pork. What colour is your toothpaste? Blue and white. Have you ever been suspended from school? No. Have you ever inhaled helium? Once, I believe. Are you a fan of Adam Sandler? Yeah, I think he's pretty funny and a talented actor. What was the last fruit you ate? An apple. A candied apple for Valentine's Day, but still an apple, haha. Have you ever watched Parks and Recreation? With Sara's family, yeah. It was fine. Have you watched a movie this week? I haven't watched a movie in many months. Have you set an alarm today? Yeah, just to ensure I was up for group therapy today. Have you asked someone for advice today? No. What was the last website you were on, other than this one? YouTube. Have you ever been to Hawaii? No, but it'd be cool. Well, thinking about the humidity... Have you watched more than an hour of TV today? No; I haven't watched television in a long time. Do you keep magazines by your toilet? No. The last time you got dressed up, where did you go? I got my makeup done and put on a dress for a Halloween "witch" shoot with my friend and some other people. The pictures pretty much don't exist because they're blurry as shit and way too dark because we left too late. I don't know why we even left the house to do it by the time everyone figured their shit out. I was really disappointed because I thought Summer made me look really, really pretty. ;_; Did the one person who hurt you the most in your life apologize? Yes, but I don't know if he really meant it. He might have just wanted me off his back, but I kinda feel now that he meant it, at least regarding how it happened. Are you proud of who you are? Only in the sense that I think I have a good heart. Otherwise, no. I've accomplished so little. Have you ever been to Costco? We don't have those here, so no. Do/did you have to wear a uniform to your high school? No, thank Christ. Only in middle school. How many video games do you own? A whole lot. Have you ever been to a casino? If so, which one(s)? No. Have you ever visited a sex shop? No. How many sets of keys do you have for your house? One. Do you give spare keys to your place to your friends and family? Our landlord/family friend has one. Then obviously my sisters do, too. Have you ever ridden a bicycle through a busy city? Oh hell no. Do you use Instagram? How often do you post there? Yes, two for each of my photography "styles." I don't post a lot myself, but I react to stuff. When was the last time you high-fived someone? I believe the last time I was at my sister's and my nephew caught a Pokemon on his first throw in Pokemon GO. He and his sister LOVE that game; that's the first thing they ask to do when I come over, haha. Their dad doesn't like it because it's "evil" (which he finds most things, really...), and it's something I could roll my eyes into the back of my head about, but I still have to respect his parenting and ask if they can play it first. He let's 'em, just not long. He also took away the Pikachu plushy I gave Aubree because it's her favorite one. :^) Guess who doesn't fuckin like him lmao. Do you like writing? How often do you write? I love writing! I don't do it very much nowadays except through surveys, though. RP is kinda on pause, so surveys is really how I just get stuff out, even if it isn't creative. Are there any posters or artworks hanging in your living room? Artwork and family photos, yes. What's your favourite place to get pizza? I'm a basic bitch that loves her some Domino's. How many times have you been to the beach? Quite a few times. We live only like two hours away, and considering Myrtle Beach is a common dance competition location, we've been a couple handfuls of instances. Has there ever been a fire inside your house? Tell me the story. No. After we moved out of my childhood house though that we actually owned, the fucking idiots who were moving in completely roasted it to pitch by setting boxes on the goddamn stove and accidentally turning it on. The house had to be entirely rebuilt. My parents were livid considering it was THEIR house. Have you ever had a scary encounter with a wild animal? No. What was the best school project you remember doing? I actually really enjoyed the huge essay I did on toxic masculinity the last time I tried college. I've always been very firm about letting men be humans and not emotionless robots, but I learned a lot more while researching and writing. Name a video game you can play over and over again: Shadow of the Colossus is #1. I've beaten it at least 30 times, maybe even 40+; it's been too long since I've seen the save files. It's a relatively short game (you can beat it in less than like, four hours if you know what you're doing) and just very relaxing yet simultaneously absolutely epic to me. God, I want a PS4 to play the remaster, like beyond words. It looks incredible, and I want to try to get white Agro. Have you ever petted a cow, a sheep, or a pig? A pig, yes. I love pigs.

[vinylexams]

A very special fireside interview with XUXA SANTAMARIA

Check Insta for our thoughts on this landmark album from Oakland duo XUXA SANTAMARIA. Stay right where you are to read a really fun interview I scored with the band this week. They’ve just released Chancletas D’Oro on Ratskin Records out of Oakland and Michael blessed me with my very own copy. It was so good I knew I needed to tell you all about it and I wanted to pick their brains a little bit, too. Without further ado, please enjoy:

//INTERVIEW

You’re still breaking into indie world at large, but you’ve already got a huge following back in California and your home-base in Oakland. What has it been like to be featured in major outlets like The Fader?

SC: We are a funny project; we ebb and flow from being total hermits to having periods of relatively high visibility (relative to aforementioned hermit state). I wouldn’t say we have a huuuge following in CA but I do think that the ‘fandom’ we’ve developed here is really genuine because we don’t play shows out of an obligation to remain visible but instead do so because we feel super passionate about the work and the audience and I think people respond to that energy. I for one, and perhaps this is because of my background in performance, have a hard time performing the same stuff over and over without change which accounts for us being selective with our playing live. That’s also why videos are such an important part of what we’re about. The piece in The Fader was important to the launch of this album because it established some of the themes and, to an extent, the aesthetics of this album in a way that can be experienced outside of a live setting. None of this is to say we don’t like playing live, in fact we love it, we just like to make our sets pleasurable to ourselves and to our audience by constantly reworking it. We strike a weird balance for sure but we’ve made peace with it. If we ever ‘make it’ (lol) it’ll be on these terms.

Chancletas D'Oro is a pretty incredible record and while it reminds me of a few bands here or there, it’s got a really fresh and unique style that merges dance with all sorts of flavors. How would you describe your music to someone who is curious to listen?

MGK: Haha, we generally struggle to describe our music in a short, neat way (not because we make some kind of impossible-to-categorize music, but just because it’s the synthesis of a ton of different influences and it’s hard for US to perceive clearly). But with that caveat in mind - IDK, bilingual art-punk influenced dance/electronic music?

SC: Thank you for saying so, we’re pretty into it :) Like Matt says, we struggle to pin it down which I think is in part to what he says – our particular taste being all over the place, from Drexciya to The Kinks to Hector Lavoe- but I think this slipperiness has a relationship to our concept making and world building. As creative people we make and intake culture like sharks, always moving, never staying in one place too long. Maybe it’s because we’re both so severely ADHD (a boon in this instance tbh) that we don’t sit still in terms of what we consume and I think naturally that results in an output that is similarly traveling. Point is, the instance a set of words - ‘electronic’, ‘dance’, ‘punk’- feel right for the music is the same instance they are not sufficient. I propose something like: the sound of a rainforest on the edge of a city, breathy but bombastic, music made by machines to dance to, pleasurably, while also feeling some of the sensual pathos of late capitalism as seen from the bottom of the hill.

The internet tells me you’ve been making music as Xuxa Santamaria for a decade now. What has the evolution and development of your songwriting been like over those ten years?

MGK: Well, when we first started out as a band we were so new to making electronic music (Sofia’s background was in the art world and mine was in more guitar-based ‘indie rock’ I guess - lots of smoking weed and making 4 track tapes haha), so we legit forgot to put bass parts on like half the songs on our first album LOL. We’ve learned a lot since then! But in seriousness, we’ve definitely gotten better at bouncing ideas back and forth, at putting in a ton of different parts and then pulling stuff back, and the process is really dynamic and entertaining for both of us.

SC: This project started out somewhat unusually: I was in graduate school and beginning what would become a performance practice. I had hit a creative roadblock working with photography - the medium I was in school to develop- and after reading Frank Kogan’s Real Punks Don’t Wear Black felt this urge to make music as a document of experience following Kogan’s excellent essay on how punk and disco served as spatial receptacles for a wealth of experiences not present in the mainstream of the time. I extrapolated from this notion the idea that popular dance genres like Salsa, early Hip Hop, and Latin Freestyle among many others, had served a similar purpose for protagonists of a myriad Caribbean diasporas. These genres in turn served as sonic spaces to record, even if indirectly, the lived experiences of the coming and going from one’s native island to the mainland US wherein new colonial identities are placed upon you. From this I decided to create an alter ego (ChuCha Santamaria, where our band name originally stems from) to narrate a fantastical version of the history of Puerto Rico post 1492 via dance music. We had absolutely no idea what we were doing but I look back on that album (ChuCha Santamaria y Usted - on vinyl from Young Cubs Records) fondly. It’s rough and strange and we’ve come so far from that sound but it’s a key part of our trajectory. Though my songwriting has evolved to move beyond the subjective scope of this first album - I want to be more inclusive of other marginalized spaces- , it was key that we cut our teeth making it. We are proud to be in the grand tradition of making an album with limited resources and no experience :P

We’re a big community of vinyl enthusiasts and record collectors so first and foremost, thanks for making this available on vinyl. What does the vinyl medium mean to you as individuals and/or as a band?

MGK: I think for us, it’s the combination of the following: A. The experience of listening in a more considered way, a side at a time. B. Tons of real estate for graphics and design and details. C. The sound, duh!

SC: In addition to Matt’s list, I would just say that I approach making an album that will exist in record form as though we were honing a talisman. Its objecthood is very important. It contains a lot of possibility and energy meant to zap you the moment you see it/ hold it. I imagine the encounter with it as having a sequence: first, the graphics - given ample space unlike any other musical medium/substrate- begin to tell a story, vaguely at first. Then, the experience of the music being segmented into Side A and Side B dictate a use of time that is impervious to - at the risk of sounding like an oldie - our contemporary habit of hitting ‘shuffle’ or ‘skip’. Sequencing is thus super important to us (this album has very distinct dynamics at play between sides a/b ). We rarely work outside of a concept so while I take no issue with the current mode of music dissemination, that of prioritizing singles, it doesn’t really work for how we write music.

MGK: We definitely both remain in love with the ‘album as art object/cohesive work’ ideal, so I would say definitely - we care a lot about track sequencing, always think in terms of “Side A/Side B” (each one should be a distinct experience), and details like album art/inserts/LP labels etc matter a lot to us.

What records or albums were most important to you growing up? Which ones do you feel influenced your music the most?

SC: I know they’re canceled cus of that one guy but I listened to Ace of Base’s The Sign a lot as a kid and I think that sorta stuff has a way of sticking with you. I always point to the slippery role language plays in them being a Swedish band singing in English being consumed by a not-yet-English speaking Sofía in Puerto Rico in the mid 90s. Other influences from childhood include Garbage, Spice Girls, Brandy + Monica’s The Boy is Mine, Aaliyah, Gloria Trevi, Olga Tañon etc etc. In terms of who influences me now, that’s a moving target but I’d say for this album I thought a lot about the sound and style of Kate Bush, Technotronic, Black Box, Steely Dan, ‘Ray of Light’-era Madonna plus a million things I’m forgetting.

MGK: Idk, probably a mix of 70-80s art rock/punk/postpunk (Stooges, Roxy Music, John Cale, Eno, Kate Bush, Talking Heads, Wire, Buzzcocks, etc etc), disco/post-disco R&B and dance music (Prince, George Clinton, Chic, Kid Creole), 90s pop + R&B + hip hop (Missy & Timbaland, Outkast/Dungeon Family production-wise are obviously awe-inspiring, So So Def comps, Jock Jams comps, Garbage & Hole & Massive Attack & so on), and unloved pop trash of all eras and styles.

Do you have any “white whale” records that you’ve yet to find?

MGK: Ha - the truth is that we’re both much more of a “what weird shit that we’ve never heard of can we find in the bargain bin” type of record buyer than “I have a custom list of $50 plus records on my discogs account that I lust over”.

SC: Not really, I’m wary of collectorship. That sort of ownership might have an appeal in the hunt, once you have it do you really use it, enjoy it? Funnily, I have a massive collection of salsa records that has entries a lot of music nerds would cry over (though they’re far from good condition, the spines were destroyed by my Abuela’s cat, Misita lol, but some are first pressings in small runs). For me its value however, comes from its link to family, as documents from another time and as an amazing capsule of some of the best music out of the Caribbean. I’m glad I am their guardian (a lot of this stuff is hard to find elsewhere, even digitally) but I live with those records, they’re not hidden away in archival sleeves, in fact, I use some of that music in my other work. Other than that, the records I covet are either those of friends or copies of albums that hold significance but which are likely readily available, Kate Bush’s The Dreaming or Love’s Forever Changes, or The Byrds Sweetheart of The Rodeo as random examples

Finally, is there a piece of interesting band trivia you’ve never shared in another interview?

SC: haha, not really? Maybe that we just had a baby together?

//

Congrats on your new baby, and also for this wonderful new album. It was a pleasure chatting with you and I can’t wait to see what the future has in store for you and your music!

[thesimplewife]

How to Period Like a Unicorn

I recently heard a No Filter podcast where Mia Freedman interviewed a woman called Lucy Peach. She is a folk-singer and a comedian, turned Period Preacher. The title ‘How to Period Like a Unicorn’ grabbed my interest and I was not disappointed. 

In the last five years my body has endured two pregnancies and births. I have breastfed both of my babies for a combined total of 24 months. I have dealt with postnatal depression. Between the two pregnancies my body had time to fall back into its own natural cycle.

I’ve always been pretty empathetic and emotional. But what was postnatal depression? What was irrational overthinking and anxiety? What was me just being me? Then I heard this podcast. What. was. hormones.

We tend not to talk about periods. Ew! you might say. I think for most women who don’t have excruciating pain, heavy bleeding or endometriosis, you just get on with it and don’t give it much thought. In our society ‘PMS’ is something to be written off, it’s just a cop out - Oh she’s having a bad week, must be PMS. Whether it’s coming from men or women I think Lucy Peach is right. Yes, PMS is a real thing, it exists. And it would be so fantastic if we as women understood our cycle more and then educated our sisters, daughters and friends. If we educated our partners, husbands, brothers and sons. The menstrual cycle is part of who we are as women, and all the emotional and normal changes that come with it. We should embrace it. 

It all begins with day one of your cycle, the day of first blood, haha. In her more tasteful period preaching Lucy Peach calls this, 

WINTER - 

The first day of your period. Your hormones are at rock bottom, your energy levels are low and you’re a little bit sensitive. You need to nurture yourself, fill up your own cup and rest. Don’t take on any big projects, it’s okay to say no or not yet. Lucy shares that it’s not procrastination, it’s prioritising and self-preservation. During Winter we should take the time to meditate and relax, especially as our bodies are more in tune with that mindset. 

SPRING - 

Your body is getting ready to ovulate, your oestrogen is rising and you might be a little bit anxious. You could be making list after list after list and have the energy and urge to accomplish everything (anyone else on board yet?) but you could also feel overwhelmed. You don’t need as much sleep in Spring, you might be waking earlier than usual. You’re so task-focused with all your projects and goals you become single-minded and impatient, not really having the time for others ideas. Your oestrogen peaks, you ovulate and suddenly things become softer and maybe to the outside eye a little less chaotic. 

SUMMER - 

You’re riding high on energy. Hello progestin, your feel-good hormone. Summer is a little bit like Oprah. You can have a new car, and YOU can have a new car! You can have a new car and YOU can have a new car! Except that next week, in Autumn, you’ll wonder why you didn’t get a new car. (Can you see yourself in this cycle yet?) Enjoy that progestin, enjoy those good vibes only, but be cautious and aware. Be wary of making big commitments because you’re feeling all of the feelings at the moment. (Have you ever just wanted to adopt every homeless dog? Or sponsor every hungry child? You think maybe you were in Summer?) Be yourself, if you are compassionate and giving, don’t hold back - just be wary not to overcommit and send yourself into Autumn already burnt out. 

AUTUMN - 

In Autumn all your emotions are coming down, you’re not in the same space emotionally as you were last week. That in itself may cause some inner conflict and confusion. You have less energy and care for the little things like where the heck your toddler put that little orange Duplo teddy. Figure. It. Out. Look. After. Your. Stuff. You’re probably irrational. And irritable. If you play any competitive sports maybe your opponent may need to brace themselves. Spend time with yourself, channel your creative energy. Crochet. Sew. Knit. Sing. Dance. Act. You don’t need an attachment to the outcome, you just need to let it out. Autumn will test the strength of your relationships, you don’t really have a filter. 

One week I’m all about being the best version of myself I can be. The next I’m short-tempered, impatient and yet again said something I shouldn’t have. At times this can be a self-defeating cycle, looking at how far I’ve come only to fall back into the rut. 

I thought in sharing How to Period Like a Unicorn with my husband I’d be met with a little harmless snicker and that old oh yeah PMS phrase. But I was pleasantly surprised. He could also see me in the seasons and was on board for mapping it out. 

I think it’s fantastic that Lucy tours with her husband Richard (his sketches are super cool). He’s totally on board and in the podcast she says sometimes he just asks ‘Where are you at? Just tell me, so I can understand.’ So she will, then she goes on to say that during this window of 4 days invite all your friends over, I’ll make them a feast, we’ll entertain, we’ll do this, and do that and I’ll be as good as gold! How incredible is that. Not only that you can have good communication with your partner, but a level of communication that doesn’t make talking about who you were made to be unacceptable. 

I don’t know yet how we’ll educate our son and daughter about How to Period Like a Unicorn. But I know we will. For now I’m just happy to understand myself better and share that with my husband. 

You can check out Lucy Peach live here.

mygreatestperiodever

[shemakesmusic-uk]

INTERVIEW: Bonander.

Enigmatic and alluring Bonander has just released her visionary debut album, Things We Don’t Talk About through Icons Creating Evil Art. The full-length follows leading tracks ‘Backseat’, ‘Martha’ and ‘Gone In The Wind’.

Bonander is the shorthand for Elliner Sterner Bonander. Sporting the role of musician, arranger and producer, the native Swede is a woman unchained. Injecting darkness into the candied vein of pop, her LP demonstrates her sheer femme-power, unpicking existentialist tropes through a feminist lens.

Things We Don’t Talk About is a monumental debut in summation; where cinematic strings meet playful synth melodies and dense bass lines caress vocals that catch on the wind.

In addition to the daydream, analogue warmth of forerunners ‘Backseat’ and ‘Martha’, Bonander’s penchant for darkness erupts in tracks such as ‘Silent Lights’ and ‘Ms. Mitchell’. The album is broken up by softer ditties such as ‘Statue’, ‘Slumber Love’ and ‘Ode’, which unlock her more vulnerable side.

Traversing her perspective of the world and relationships through music, Things We Don’t Talk About, Bonander encourages the listener to join her discourse of uncomfortable topics. Meanwhile, the album brings noise to those who have fallen custom to silence such as her homage to the first female sniper in ‘Annie’ and all-consuming, explosive number ‘Ms. Mitchell’ for one of the first acknowledged astronomers Maria Mitchell. 

We had a chat with Elliner all about the album, struggles she’s had in the music industry, what she’s passionate about outside of music an more. Read the interview below.

Hi Elliner! How have you been? What does a typical day look like for you at the moment? “Hi! I’m well, thanks for asking. I currently work as a music and media production teacher at the Royal College of Music in Stockholm combined with my freelance work as an artist. Every day is different, which suits me in these weird times. Sometimes I have zoom lectures and sometimes I’m in my studio recording, mixing or producing.” We last spoke to you back in 2018 when you released your debut EP It's A Girl. You've now released your debut album Things We Don't Talk About. Please take us through how you've gotten to this point. “Oh, well the journey towards the finished album has been long, it’s always a matter of time with these things. I’ve been playing my songs, writing new ones, recording demos, recording for real, editing, producing, then arranging for supplements like strings, go on to record them, producing some more etc. When the recordings are finished comes the next step in the process where I send them to mix, go on mix meetings, send to master, listen to master, discuss eventual adjustments and so on and so forth. It’s a complicated and time consuming process but one I greatly enjoy never the less.” What are the songs on the new record about and what does the LP mean to you? “I hope I will be able to take the listener on a joyful journey through uncomfortable topics, topics we should talk more about. That’s the idea of the album and that’s what the singles and the rest of the tracks are all about. Close relationships that wither (an example of this is my latest single ‘Gone In The Wind’), historical figures we’ve forgotten (I’ve already released a track about Annie Oakley, but there is also a celebration of one of the first female astronomers, Maria Mitchell on the album), stories about silence and oppression (I wrote a track called ‘Statue’ as a reaction to all the stories I heard from friends, colleagues, family when metoo happened. I’ve carried that tune around ever since). “All tracks touch on the same topic: the complexity of the female identity, an identity we simplify, harass, abuse and forget in our everyday life.”

Musically, how is Things We Don't Talk About different (or similar) to your previous material? Were there any musical influences or sounds that you were able to incorporate on this record that you hadn’t previously? “Oh, great question! I’ve been experimenting a lot with acoustic instruments, especially string arrangements in combination with more electronic sounds. I’ve always loved dramatic arrangements and I’ve also tried to experiment with the dynamic between the tracks. So if you’ve heard the end of a very big, loud and emotional track I’ve often followed it with a minimalistic acoustic organic one. I want the music to be a journey where you get close to the artist and sit in the same room as her while she plays, and then be thrown into a produced and big soundscape that only exists in the listeners headphones. I’ve wanted to play with the sense of live music and pre produced music, big sounds in contrast to simpler ones, polished lead vocals in contrast to one-takes that has flaws in them and so forth. Most of all I’m lucky to be around some amazing musicians that make reality of these arrangements. I’ve had guest appearances such as string-, trumpet- and pipe organ players.”

Take us through your creative process for the LP. What was your favourite part making it? And were there any parts you found particularly challenging? “There are two parts of the process I love the most. Firstly, when you write a song, create a demo for it. When creativity is at its best and you have this feeling that you are about to create something great, before you start to doubt everything you’ve done and twisting and turning the material too much. Secondly, that moment when the idea becomes reality, especially in cooperation with other people. For example when my co-producer Elias understands the spirit of the song and does something perfect for it that I never would’ve thought of, or when your string arrangement that’s only been in your head, is played by musicians for the first time. That’s as close as you get to magic in this world.” What do you hope fans will take away from Things We Don't Talk About? “I hope they will experience something new. I hope they will feel feelings. Maybe even get a new perspective of something, get inspired. Maybe even dare to talk about something that they need to talk about. And then, ofc, I’ll hope they’ll enjoy it, haha.” What struggles, if any, have you faced as an artist in the music business and how have you overcome them? “I mean, it’s a tough business. It’s hard enough for commercial music and big labels to reach through the noise and buzz of everything, so when you’re an indie artist trying to get by it’s really tough. It was difficult enough before corona and now it feels like a race you can’t win. That’s one part. “The other struggle is to be a woman in technology. I’m as involved in how to patch a microphone for my track as writing its lyrics. And sometimes people don’t quite get that, which makes you feel like you represent all tech-working women in the industry. If you make a mistake you’ve lost all your credibility, whilst if a guy made that same mistake it wouldn’t be recepted as ”oh it’s because he is a guy that happened”. This makes you put a lot of unnecessary energy in proving yourself to people that've made up their mind about you before you’ve even met them.” If there was one thing you could change about the music world today, what would it be? “That music, and culture in general, isn’t controlled by demand. That culture and art can exist and thrive despite that. I think that would broaden the consumer's mind, but right now people don’t know what they’re missing. For that to happen, we need to value art and culture more than we do these days. Art is the heart of democracy, of free thought, of questioning what the status quo is by its mere existence.” What are you passionate about outside of music? “I freelance in music- and media production so I also create and work for other artists’ projects. That’s a true privilege. Otherwise I love learning and reading, mostly about women history but also about how norms and structural oppression work in our society. Sometimes I put that knowledge into my teaching work and that’s also a joy.” Finally, what's next for you? I expect you're wanting to get back to touring as soon as it's safe to do so? What are you missing most about performing live? “Yes that’s actually something I’ve longed for a loooooong time, as all other musicians and artists out there. I started my artistry by performing on stage and learning how to play. It’s in the core of everything. I guess what I miss the most is the interaction with the audience; the giving and taking. The immediate response to something you’ve created: what a luxury that is!”

Things We Don’t Talk About is out now.

[cleansoil]

painting rosé n waterfalls also black nail polish please

thank u for asking ily. also small disclaimer i am a little drunk so sorry for how long and messy these answers are lol

painting: in what ways are you creative?

im gonna preface with i hated writing this answer because idk how to say im good at things and i feel like it all sounds pretentious 

i dont think of myself as a creative person at all because im not very good at coming up with original ideas in art so this made me hmmm.

however im really good at cooking which is nice bcs i often cook for my friends and they are like this is the best version of this dish ive ever had. and also being vegan means you kinda have to be creative bcs i really like meaty/cheesy/creamy things which is like the opposite of vegan lol so working out what ingridents can replicate that has taken a lot of research and testing. and then having no money bcs student loans, mental illness & drug addiction meant i had to do that without spending money or energy. so i had to work out how to create a food that was vegan, cheap, very easy to make, and would taste as good as any not vegan thing.

im also good at giving people different perspectives on their problems especially if it involves empathising with someone else. and coming up with reasona that could be causing someone to act a certain way. ive experienced a range of things and im intensly self aware so im good at explaining to people why they are acting a certain way or why someone around them is acting a certain way. having a lot of undiagnosed mental health problems as a teenager lead to me doing a lot of research into psychology so i now know A Lot about mental health and understanding why people do hurtful things to others.

i also study philosophy so i know how to structure arguments well and how to pick them apart very thourghly. i can come up with a way to argue anything and to refute any argument. this is similar to the last one but yeah im generally good at seeing things from different perspectives and understanding why people would have those perspectives from studying psychology & philosophy.

i amost forgot this one but i have an 'interesting' fashion sense. its something i actually dont think about anymore because its such an ingrained thing to me at this point but im good at coming up with styles and outfits for myself. i like finding what colours go together and look good and how to make something look simultaneously ridiculous yet coordinated.

i make pretty journals too, working out the combination of scetches, colours, personal writings, collage, etc is fun and some of my journals are BEAUTIFUL its annoying i cant generally show them around to people because a lot of the text is very sad and awkward to read but i appriciate them.

in general im good a curating beautiful moments, i often find myself thinking about how something would look from an ouside perspective. something ive been told a lot is that my life is very aesthetic. i will find a way to place myself in a situation eg. like watching the sunset from a roof top with a loved one smoking a cigarette. im just generally good at making life look like an indie movie. or thinking that something will be a fun story to tell so creating it.

and lastly i like tattooing people, im v much a perfectionist which is useful in tattooing by hand because its gotta be very perfect lol.

rosè: what’s your opinion on shyness? 

firstly this seems like a weird thing to have an opinion on lol but

i guess its interesting how pathologicalised its become vs how it used to be considered a personality trait. things like avpd, social anxiety, autism/scd would make someone appear shy but then like are there people that are just shy without having a mental health issue? then then also introverts vs extroverts. like i seem shy to people because of my mental health problems but i dont think of myself as shy because at baseline im a massive extrovert, i love people, and i like sharing things about myself. but im not "shy" i just have a disorder like its not a personality trait its an illness. i kinda feel like the concept of being shy just dismisses social anxiety as something thats normal and okay when if your afraid to talk to people you should find ways to get past it and maybe get therapy if you can.

waterfalls: describe your perfect date.

i dont think its about the activity of the date itself but more about the person. i also dont think there would be any one perfect person. overall it would have to be beautiful, romantic, interesting, memorable, and long. probably having food and wine somewhere then going to a beautiful location and having interesting and deep converstations. i usually date people that are pretty into physics & philosophy & stuff like that because i like learning from people. maybe my ideal date would be sitting on a cliff at sunset while someone explains their theory of the universe to me. yet at the same time i appriciated the last date i went on where i went to the pub w a dude (who was not as attractive irl as he was in his pics) and he talked about how he had an incredibly smart lizard then i downed his beer bcs we were getting kicked out and i showed him my titty tat. i guess i think all dates, good or bad, are perfect because they are a good part of human experience also im a lonely lil bitch id take any romance rn. one of my favourite genre of dates is where the other person doesnt realise its a date because those are often very cute and less nerve wracking and i like the bit after where one of you if like haha that was a date and the other is like omg... i didnt know but u hoped

black nail polish: what do you do to pamper yourself? 

ngl nothing rn and i should probably change that lol

[ofcloudsandstars]

Celestial Forecast

Week June 22 - 28

Highlights: where to begin!

Today, June 22nd, Neptune will go retrograde!

Jupiter rx and Pluto rx in Capricorn are conjunct all week starting today.

On Thursday the 25th, Venus goes direct in Gemini!

On Saturday the 27th, the moon has beneficial trines with Jupiter rx and Pluto rx in Capricorn then Saturn rx in Aquarius giving us a boost towards our inner goals and aspirations.

On Sunday the 28th, Mars enters Aries! Also the final quarter moon in Libra has beneficial trines to Venus in Gemini and is conjunct Juno and Sappho making it a fantastic day for friendship and love attraction magic. 

Oh my GOODNESS! Before I begin: I do apologize for posting this late (last week's end of the week was very eventful with the Summer Solstice and eclipse and everything so though I charted everything earlier I did run out of time), BUT this week's transits are going to be INCREDIBLE! A ride! It will be a look at your soul, your inner philosophy, spiritualities and faith, and what truths and beliefs you hold dear and what mentalities that may no longer serve you in order for you to work towards your best potential, your genuine authenticity, your realest goals and deepest aspirations. Today Neptune goes retrograde AND today Pluto rx and Jupiter rx are conjunct for the ENTIRE WEEK. This energy makes you driven to succeed. Since the energy is retrograde you will focus on what obstacles or mental blocks within that could be keeping you from your inner expansion or connection to your inner sources of power. With Neptune retrograde our usual veils or self delusions will be ripped away so we can not really lie to ourselves anymore of how we are holding ourselves back. It's all about honesty and the truth of what keeps your spirituality together. This week is a great beginning (especially after the Solar eclipse!) of how you can make a huge positive difference in your life, beginning internally. (And no worries, as Pluto and Jupiter go direct they will conjunct each other again! So this energy will be revisited and we will want to move forward with our plans!) It is really important this week to consider what you want to do during this phase of life. You should focus on your inner philosophy, your spirituality and sources of your magic. It's great for spiritual self-development. Additionally it's fantastic to focus on business, sources of wealth and abundance or a promotion on your career. At the end of this week we have Mars moving into Aries giving us a fresh boost in this energy!! Following the solar eclipse the themes here really are for us to make ways to reinvent ourselves to our highest potentials! 

Note: times are set to UTC

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22nd

Neptune retrogrades in Pisces Jupiter rx and Pluto rx are conjunct all week in Capricorn Neptune rx in Pisces sextiles Psyche in Taurus ☾♋ Moon Conjunct Mercury rx in Cancer ☾♋ Moon Trines Ceres and Neptune rx in Pisces ☾♋ Moon Sextiles Psyche in Taurus

Energy: Y'ALL!!!! Day one starts off with a lot of intense soul-reckoning energy after the solar eclipse plunging us into the murky emotional depths of Cancer season on the solstice. Aside from the most important transit of Jupiter rx and Pluto rx that will be conjunct all week long beginning today, the next most important astrological event is Neptune going into retrograde. Within it's shadow as a user of magic you may have started to notice less of an inspiration to do lighter whimsical magical activities. It can strip away the rose-tinted glasses in our life and take away the whimsy and fantasies. This can impact our spiritual paths if we were not being honest about it's intent. This retrograde wants us to be honest with our own sense of power and connection to our spirituality. If the intent of your practice and connection to your inner magic was to improve yourself or find a real connection to your energy and energy around you, this retrograde could help you fortify that bond. However, if the intent of your spiritual practice is actually a form of 'love and light' only feel-good escapism, this retrograde which loves to strip away illusions can leave you stuck in the harsh reality of our world. It can feel a bit hard channeling our creative muse, our whimsical sense of spiritual exploration under this transit, but the retrograde wants you to understand WHY you've had those connections to the first place and if they had any relationships to anything substantial. Ideals and spirituality are rooted in something real and not just beliefs and fantasy. Neptune RX wants you to figure out what's the roots of your practice. How we connect with our soul's path and handle karmic obstacles additionally gets brought to the surface with Neptune's retrograde sextiling Psyche in Taurus. On top of that the moon will sextile Psyche as well creating an emotional need to work with this asteroid's energy of inner soul reckoning on day 1 this week. (The moon will also tie this energy back to Neptune rx with a beneficial trine). The fusion of these transits energy between the Moon, Neptune rx and Psyche will possibly bring up themes on how you handle adversity, how you feel connected to your soul and karmic lessons you have to overcome, even in situations where you might have lost faith. Previous memories may be brought up as the Moon in Cancer will conjunct Mercury rx in Cancer bringing up deep emotional memories from the past that could bring understanding and highlight current emotions tying in with these themes. Lastly the moon will trine Ceres in Pisces making it a good day to nurture yourself and those closest to you. It's a lot of energy to take in on day one so it's good to take time for yourself.  

Recommendations: Reflect on your spirituality and journal. Maybe have a free writing session. You may feel blocked during this time, but it's a period of cleansing and often what you need to cleanse or the internal obstacles may take time to reveal themselves (don't worry they will with Neptune retrograde haha). Take time alone to go on a walk and reflect by a body of water.

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23rd

Sun in Cancer squares Sappho in Libra Neptune rx in Pisces sextiles Eros in Taurus ☾♋ Moon Trines Mars in Pisces ☾ VOC 8:20 - 13:33 ☾♌  Moon enters Leo ☾♌ Moon Sextiles Venus rx in Gemini and Sappho in Libra

Energy: Today has a lot of fiery energy to focus on our inner interests, values and philosophies that could help us on our early journey of Neptune's retrograde and the conjunct between Pluto rx and Jupiter rx's transit. The transits today can help us to illuminate our causes, what gives us purpose and inspiration.

All day the Sun in Cancer will be squaring Sappho in Libra, the asteroid of our true interests and what makes us feel authentic. This square will create pressure to want to reflect on these themes and focus on our most genuine interests and attractions. This transit can help us to find answers during Neptune's RX. Neptune rx will also be sextiling Eros in Taurus giving us the desire to work or explore our inner ideals or find the internal connection to our spirituality. There will also be an energetic burst from the Moon trining Mars in Pisces that will give us a window of time with increased energy that can help us be direct and strive towards our goals. After a reflective void of course period (a great time to rest and reflect with the other transits happening), the moon will enter dramatic and creative Leo. The moon will sextile Venus rx in Gemini and Sappho in Libra creating a chapter where we will want to work on or resolve situations revolving around our values, genuine interests, our authenticity or relationships. With a lot of things that could have a chance to reveal themselves with the previous transits this could help us to take stock and make arrangements for things to be better aligned with what we value.

Recommendations: Take time to dive into your genuine interests. Carve time for yourself to do this. Especially as the moon waxes in it's early stages, it's a good time to learn and take in new information. Especially with the Jupiter rx and Pluto rx conjunction try to focus on things that interest you that can help you expand on your inner truth, authenticity, source of power or connect you to yourself on a soul level.

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24th

☾♌ Moon Squares Uranus and Eros in Taurus ☾♌ Moon Trines Chiron in Aries ☾♌ Moon Sextiles Juno in Libra

Energy: With the moon in creative and dynamic Leo, some of that fiery energy can create bursts of intensity and exciting spontaneity. It will be a day of self-exploration along with opportunities for healing. First the moon sextile Juno in Libra which will help us focus towards our commitments or where we like to devote our energy towards. These themes will be brought to the surface of our emotions for us to review. After the moon will square Uranus in Taurus and trine Chiron in Aries creating sudden changes, intense need for spontaneity and potential for healing. This combination of energy can make us act out in new eccentric ways, act on impulse yet with the combination of Chiron it can be in a way where we may feel the need to suddenly act out on a situation we have been stagnant on for a long time in order to bring about a sudden solution or to heal ourselves. After the moon in Leo will square Eros in Taurus giving us pressure to act out on our desires. You may be channeling this energy in focusing on a strategy to get what you currently need. This window of time can create a burst of productive energy to go after what you truly want!

Recommendations: The energy today seems very active and fiery along with self-focused with the moon transiting Leo. A great way to work with this energy is by focusing on yourself with a meditation and bringing awareness to what you want to change and heal. Having a quiet moment to reflect before getting swayed by the intensity of the day can help you make better decisions in bringing about a better reality.

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25th

Venus direct in Gemini ☾♌ Moon Squares Psyche in Taurus ☾♌ Moon Opposite Saturn rx in Aquarius ☾ VOC 6:34 - 18:04 ☾♍ Moon enters Virgo ☾♍ Moon Opposite Mars in Pisces

Energy: The lovely Venus awakens from her slumber finally! With Venus finally direct it's time to put your reviewed values to the test with new relationships and partnerships. Especially with all of the previous transits like Juno retrograde, we may have a fresher outlook on our needs and boundaries in partnerships and what kind of people and values we would like to surround ourselves with. However this day will not be so lighthearted with the intense lunar transits. First the moon will be opposite Saturn rx in Aquarius bringing about restrictions or obstacles that could manifest from emotional blocks within due to Saturn's retrograde nature that could be triggered by external events. This may put pressure on how we feel we handle adversity and inner growth with the moon squaring Psyche in Taurus. After a reflective void of course, the moon will enter calculating Virgo and will bring it opposite Mars in Pisces. External events could bring about challenges, irritations and aggression. However this energy can bring positive opportunities of challenges that ask you to fight for what you want or fight for a cause that will help loved ones. This energy following the moon's opposition with Saturn rx can potentially help us to confront our inner mental blocks and challenge it through external obstacles.

Recommendations: With the unharmonious transits of the moon opposing Saturn rx and Mars, we may be confronted with blockages and obstacles, yet today would be good to put energy towards barrier-breaking magic or opening crossroads. However with Neptune retrograde there may be a possibility where we feel the need to tackle issues on a mundane level then energetically. It's a good day to address your obstacles and issues head on especially with the beneficial conjunction of Jupiter rx and Pluto rx which can help you expand on your inner source of power.

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26th

☾♍ Moon Squares Venus in Gemini ☾♍ Moon Opposite Neptune rx and Ceres in Pisces ☾♍ Moon Trines Uranus in Taurus ☾♍ Moon Sextiles Sun, Vesta and Mercury rx in Cancer

Energy: Today is a great day to start experimenting with new creations and crafting with the Sun sextiling the Moon in Virgo. With all of the retrograde energy this experimental energy is just to experiment and not to create any new projects. If you have a current project you need to wrap up or an old project that may come back into your life during the retrogrades that needs completing but you've hit a creative block, this period of experimentation and innovation can help. (More on the innovative energy shortly!) The moon will also be squaring Venus during this time putting pressure on us to act out on our values and resolve issues or create connections with our partnerships. We will have a strong desire to connect with others today. Especially after the Venus retrograde, this is where we can put what we've learned to the task. The moon will trine Uranus in Taurus and at the same time sextile Vesta in Cancer. With the moon trining Uranus we have beneficial opportunity for new insights and helpful perspectives that can help with our experimentation. With the beneficial sextile with Vesta it can give us the push to work towards our aspirations and focus on our goals. If you might have felt blocked before this energy can help you find new solutions around your obstacles. The moon will eventually be opposite Neptune rx in pisces which can create a reality check through an external event. Maybe a spiritual belief you once held, a sugar coated lie that could have held other mentalities in place or a delusion will be stripped away due to an encounter or external situation. This can cause you to reflect and wonder how you may have held on to that belief before and if that belief still benefits you. Since the energy today does want you to progress forward this can be beneficial for shedding what you no longer need. The moon will then sextile Mercury rx in Cancer and be opposite Ceres in Pisces. Moon sextile Mercury rx can help bring up previous memories that could help illuminate our current mentalities and what ideas we should let go or implement in order to progress in our paths. It's a great time to share feelings either internally through journaling or by confiding in a close friend. If someone close to you comes to confide some emotional struggles they've been dealing with, the moon opposite Ceres may help you be extra nurturing and caring towards them or other loved ones in need. This transit could amplify the feelings the moon squaring Venus could have bought up since the pressure of that square will create a strong need to connect to others. Additionally you may feel a sense of nurturing through an external sense whether that may be from a friend or partner or an environment. If these transits have been a lot for you, today may be a day to treat yourself with an at home spa time or anything you find nurturing or relaxing.

Recommendations: It's a good time to reflect on any current obstacles and work towards your goals. Taking the time to do so today will create a powerful opportunity for tomorrow. If the obstacles are due to mental blocks or certain things not being in the right place, channeling Uranus's energy can help to bring new perspectives to help you solve your current issues.

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27th

☾♍ Moon Trines Psyche and Eros in Taurus and Jupiter rx and Pluto rx in Capricorn ☾ VOC 21:01 - 21:16 ☾♎ Moon enters Libra ☾♎ Moon Trines Saturn rx in Aquarius

Energy: Today is going to be a powerful and beneficial day so it's a good day to mark on your weekly calendar. Today will have lucky trines with the lunar transit and some powerful planets. The energy of Pluto rx and Jupiter rx's conjunction may feel heightened today as the moon will trine with their energy as well bringing a boost of potential if you choose to use that window of time to focus on inner expansion, inner source of power and aspiring towards your long term goals that aligns with your deepest needs. Before that trine the moon will trine with Psyche giving a beneficial boost where we can connect with ourselves on a deep soul level and review our karmic paths. Clarity could come from this moment on what you need to do in order to progress from your current position. After the moon will trine with Eros in Taurus which can give you extra luck and opportunities to dive towards your desires. This energy before the trine with both Pluto rx and Jupiter rx in Capricorn can create a foundation for you to make huge progress towards your goals whether it be internally or with tasks you need to complete. After a short void of course, the moon will enter Libra and trine Saturn rx in Aquarius giving us a beneficial boost in responsibility and the energy to take on any tasks or work we need to focus on, especially projects in the past or work we really need to prioritize to help our own foundation (or the foundation of our community with Saturn's current theme in Aquarius). Trines are wonderful aspects yet since trines are so harmonious, lucky and beneficial we may take the energy for granted and not use it to it's full potential which is why I urge everyone to mark the date!

Recommendations: tackling really important tasks to help yourself progress in your goals today! Have a moment to meditate and reflect on what you need to focus on. The moon finishing it's transit in virgo can help you analyze and prioritize. Then after making a list of goals and such, try to tackle whatever you need to get done! Also today just making a vision board of what you seek to achieve one day could help with all of the trines energy. With the retrogrades these planets still want you to be reflective (in the future, Pluto and Jupiter will conjunct again for another week but at that time direct!) so if you may be unclear of what you need now, it's a good time to reflect and experiment. If you do know, then it's a good time to tackle any tasks you may have been putting off in order to ensure it's future!

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28th

Mars enters Aries Mars in Aries sextiles Saturn rx in Aquarius Eros trines Jupiter rx and Pluto rx in Capricorn ☾♎ First Quarter Moon in Libra ☾♎ Moon Conjunct Juno and Sappho in Libra ☾♎ Moon Trines Venus in Gemini

Energy: We started off this week with me going like: Y'ALL!! And you know how we are ending it? With me going like: HELL YEAH BITCH!!

This week is no doubt a RIDE! But this sunday is starting us off fresh with a BANG especially after yesterday's reflective yet lucky and beneficial transits. This one wants us to shoot for the stars!!

The most NOTABLE transit today without a doubt is Mars shifting itself from sleepy Pisces into it's home sign of fiery, new beginnings, passionate, excitable ARIES and wanting us to TAKE ACTION!!! (I mean at least with strategizing and ironing out plans cause we are still deep in retrogrades and eclipse season). But Still!! Additionally Mars in Aries will sextile Saturn rx in Aquarius giving us a huge motivational push to get any work done, blaze through our task lists and lay down any foundations we need for future projects to thrive from. Also helping fuel fiery Mars's power is it's lil' companion Eros, the asteroid of our desires and will to achieve them, trining Jupiter rx and Pluto rx in Capricorn which will give us beneficial energy and extra luck with pursuing our aspirations and expanding on our inner growth and inner source of power. Additionally the moon will want to help out as it will conjunct Juno and Sappho in Libra asking us to commit to our passions and our inner values and philosophy. What attracts you, inspires you and makes you feel alive should be your priority today and the moon will ensure that with this conjunction as it will be at the surface of your emotional body. Additionally the moon will trine Venus in Gemini bringing a lucky day for partnerships which can show that teamwork can help make your dream work! Also to note, the moon is in it's first quarter phase in Libra and it's conjunct with Juno and trining Venus in Gemini, which makes this an EXCELLENT day for love magic!! If you were thinking of attracting someone special today, even if it's non-romantic and you want a business partner, someone who reflects your values, friends that will uplift you and share your interests, Venus and the Moon are both in such good placements for you to do magic in. (Especially for friendship as Venus is in Gemini). The moon in it's first quarter phase makes this an energetic day of strategizing and planning on taking action. With fiery Mars giving us a boost, no doubt we will get something done! What an exciting day to the end of this week!

Recommendations: I feel like this day is going to tell you what YOU should do with it especially with Mars's entry into Aries. It's a great day to review the goals you want to achieve and tackle them. Magic wise it's a great day for attraction magic for people you want in your life to uplift you. If you did make a vision board yesterday, today is a great day to ask for opportunities to bring those wishes your way as well as working towards them on a mundane level.

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[kendrixtermina]

Typing Misadventures - IN edition

So, typing and the difficulties therein.

Aside from person-specific ad-hominems, some that have been elaborated upon in attempts to explain them on this very website.

Sensors: Bad Sensor descriptions written by NPs, combining with the fact that Sensors rely a lot on developing a practical experential “feel” for things. A bad, vague and overly abstract description that doesn’t relate to their life is gonna be not very useful. (especially for SFPs for whom what they relate to is srz bzness) - Interestingly I’ve seen a lot of Sensors saying that they easily indentify particular types once they have encountered them IRL. (Speculation: With intuitives it probably depends more on wether they have their definitrions straight.)

Ne-Doms: Type-hop and doubt their type alot because they know they always could be mistyped and possibilities are the primary facet of reality for them. The “creative” nature of the auxillary, and their auxillary being a function that generates and handles belief systems,  means they can always reinterpret the evidence by redoing their reasoning or reassigning meaning, also the lack of Si leads to less constancy in their thinking, they change opinion easily, which is normally an asset, but not so much for self-typing as every input generates new ideas. (The auxillaries also have this but to a much lesser degree - b/c)

—

But today, I want to talk about INs (I know, boring - but those are what I know the most about since I am one.)

You may have seen me caveat my posts with “Unless I am actually an xNFP or something” as of late Yeah. It went about like this:

Troll: Haha you’re mistyped!

Me: Why?

Troll: because X.

Me: I have an alternate, more fitting explanation for X and a lot of things which my current typing explains betters especially when you get into the nuance of mbti theory.

Troll: (*hamfistedly applies overreductionistic function definition*) “Anyone who ever quotes a source ever is a Te user”. Just like anyone who ever mentions memory is a SJ amirite?

Troll: *shifts the topic to my person and then accuses me of talking about myself*

Me: *blocks troll largely to curttail own tendency to waste time & energy with internet arguments*

So at my best,  I believe in not dismissing inconvenient PoVs and double-checking, and the main point of replying them was to leave an alternate opinion for future readers hence no point in continuing after that had been done.  

At my worst damn inf Fe makes it hard to ignore input even if I don’t believe it’s justified (except when it fails to pick them up - as inferior functions are wont to be its either sluggish or AHH with little inbetween. ) and that lil 8 fix of mine doesn’t want to “stand down quietly”.  

So I ask a few reasonable, knowledgeable, non-troll person, one of which said “Hm, could be, you anecdote alot which X type also does”

I believed this was better accounted for by simple ol’ Si and w4-self revealing tendencies, but, how could I know for sure? I never denied having a pronounced 4wing and fix, but I thought that sufficiently explaining their perceived discrepancies insofar as I found them consistent with reality and indeed all data collected so far. Too much would just be filed away as “inf Te” as a blanket term, the way any sign that [fan favorite character] is ST rather than INFJ is “inferior Se” though that supposed “inferior” is 80% of what she does and all moments claimed for F or N are the sort of situations where anyone would display emotion or philosophizing and what intuition they display is distinctly Ne instead. 

Like the proverbial man who dreamt of being a frog I couldn’t cast the doubt from my mind and went over reinterpreting my thought patterns throughout the day. How do I know I’m NOT X type? After all my idea of and criteria for type are based on the definitions I extracted from various mbti sources when first familiarzing myself with the topic… how do I know I understood it correctly? How can ANY human correctly understand a definition if they have to deduce/reconstruct/guess what the other meant with their own flawed mind?

(At this point the non-INs in the audience might be rolling their eyes)

I still thought my type made the most sense but the person, through trolling in that particular instance, was not alltogether clueless and had some good insights, and also, some ppl agreed with them (theres that Fe again) - I was pretty sure I was in the holographic-panomramic thinking style but I could be wrong,  thats a fairly rarely used concept which I simply started using cause I thought it made sense. ENFPs can mistake themselves for introverts. I have been mistaken for extrovert b/c of my lack of filter… but I was pretty sure I was a very pronouncedintrovert and had Fe, and so I went over it over and over again.

They said I didn’t comprehend _ i had some theory as to why they thought the way they did (not just bias against xNFPs but assuming all Ti is like aux Ti. After all, an introverted function as a dominant builds a framework and may be reluctant to accept or need time to withdraw when said framework clashes with reality to the point of needing a full revamping, purportedly resulting in a certain stubbornness particularly if it’s a Ji function.  )

but what if I really Didn’t comprehend? Then all my reasoning would be worthless! I dont think I have the skills of an INFP, but what if i misunderstood those? Was a lot of what I’d attributed to Ti just Ne? i thought I had rather typical Ti speech patterns (it was hard to unsee, like my brain used a highly predictable parsing alghorithm to make thoughts into words) but they disagreed and pointed to what they thought was Fi. 

I thought that despite all the differences introduced by  shared preferences and  there were differences between I and the Fi doms I knew. The 9 and the 6 were much more lowkey, non-confrontational than I and way more perceptive in line with how socionics describes Fi as the “Ethics of Relations” and how Nardi calls it an “Inner state of listening/reacting”; I mostly listen to the contents of someone’s words; I’d spot a liar by contradiction or unbeliavable statements, or by deducing what beliefs they are operating from. Feelers supposedly use primarily tone of voice... but I have sure noticed tone of voice a few times, and this is a qualia. I can’t compare what “Fi” or “Ti” feel like without making assumptions of which one I am using. 

Supposedly

The 4! INFPs should be the most similar to me, on the other hand, they tend to have a certain...absoluteness in their beliefs and statements in a way I wouldn’t be comfortable with. I’m more hesitant, more relativizing, adding qualifiers etc so bI don’t say anything incorrect. 

I don’t mean to bash the INFPs here, they are usually just processing their specific feels and do not mean to imply things about others. (Tumblr INFP: “I, an INFP, experience X.”. Tumblr xxFJ: “Are you saying that other types don’t????? You can’t say that! How self absorbed are you?” Immature  Tert Fe User:*distantly feels the same urge toward ,moral condemnation as FJ,but couldn’t care less if INFP offends anyone -  settles for calling them a snowflake instead. * TJs and Ti doms: *roll their eyes, half-assedly consider correcting whoever they disagree with but ultimately just keep scrolling*) Of course Team Fe sometimes has a point if the INFP in question is young and/or irresponsible. 

Example: 

One INFP 4w5: “I be those shallow fake bitches look down on you just because you don’t wear as much makeup. I don’t think anyone who wears makeup can be trusted, unless it’s like,halloween makeup or something like that, they’re just putting up fake faces to be popular.”

Me (let’s say, presumed INTP 5w4): “I dunno... Like I agree that those girls are shallow bitches,if they had spines, they wouldn’ perform arbitrary fake behavior just to be popular.* But not everyone is the same - maybe some people might just wear makeup because they like how it looks. The real problem is people being judged by arbitrary conventions on principle. What does is matter whether someone wears makeup or not? Its a made-up convention with no real reason.  It’s none of anyone’s business.”

* for the record I have since realized that there’s nothing bad about wanting to be popular as long as yopu dont harm anyone, and that for some people its genuinely what they want. I was, like,  13. Common (w)4 pitfall I guess. 

As you see both I and this middle school friend of mine are expressing 4-ish povs, but I used to think  the difference in our reasoning highlighted some differences. 

Granted this is more 5w4 vs 4w5 than necessarily Ti vs Fi,  Could just be the 5′s general disconnect toward action and desire to “know more first”. 

There are 5 INFPs. after all. Mostly sx 5s and as such differentiable from the relatively intense, dramatic sx 4 as long as you’re certain enough that they’re sx. Thinking about how to describe them. More second-guessing and ‘drifting’ than the 4 ones but like them in their analytical nature. A different kind of contemplative.  Still reasons distinctlylike an INFP - See, One of them was religious, for example, and I’m pretty sure an INTP would have had more posts about why they were religious or not, though it’s one of the types most likely to be a non-believer, the religious ones tend to have a theological bent and talk about the perfection and incomprehensibility of god, how god is totally logical etc. (Thomas Acquinas is a famous example) - their faith will be an ordered self-consistent system. A bit like that example of copernikus assuming the orbits must be perfectly circular because natture as he understood it would tend toward the most “perfect” forms. I’m not religious and I could likewise talk about that at lenght.

Arguments that convinced me:  “This is how these beliefs came from, not an actual god” and “If were made out of single celled organism who die all the time as shed skin cells, how would the rest of them dieing at once be different?” “Even if your religion is true that means many, if not all others are not. So at least all some must be myths. How is your “true” religion different from them?” 

Arguments made by famous Te-Fi users: “Occams Razor.” “We can’t disprove a giant sucker on the back of Pluto either, but its no reason to suppose one.”“Belief in god hampers human development and creates dependent, slavish mentality”

That 5!INFP’s attitude toward their belief reminded me more of another Fi dom I know (albeit an ISFP). “Yeah, I know the common objections, but look, it’s what I believe. Don’t come into my house and be a jerk to me about it.” or “[Assholish behavior] is not actually in line with my religion. My religion, and this aspect of it, are actually about love/peace/duty/etc” 

If, while conversing,  you hit a hard disagreement, that is,  an axiom that’s not up for debate, your Fi-dom friend may change the topic/agree to disagree/ “It’s just the way I feel” 

[This could apply to other moral or ideological questions religion is just an example; This is not supposed to be about religion it’s just here to illustrate a perceived difference. . I’m not implying all INFPs have the same approach to religion or even have to be religious.]

Another conversation I remember having with them actually on the very subject of Fi vs Fe. IDK how we got to that topic but I mentioned something I initially thought was an enneagram thing (my memory is vague on the details) but I mentioned something like lowkey feeling guilty for receiving praise that I believe was undeserved. 

She deemed it a Fe thing and said that for her, as a Fi dom/ fe opposing type, a bit of praise she did not agree with might not cause any reaction at all unless she thought they had a point  or otherwise had a reaction from her end, like deciding the criticism was unfair - why should she feel guilty b/c of what someone else says? 

Granted that’s just an anecdote, but what am I to do? INFP 5s are not super common. Also I’m not making this decisionbased on any single of these examples but... not even from the “preponderance” so much as to how they can be best explained. 

And  of course, if I really did get everything wrong after looking into the topic for years, what guarantee is there that I typed any of those people correctly? None, as one of the trolls/claimants correctly pointed out. 

After all what I want is the truth, it doesn’t matter what it is. Or at least that is what I strive for as much as human frailty allows. so what if I’m an INFP? INFPs are awesome. I even considered the type early on, I just thougnt INTP fit better especially once I found out about inferior functions.  And I have always held that a person has no obligation to follow their “talents”. If I don’t have a “talent” for reason (which isn’t the same as mbti thinking anyways) all the reasons why I believe that it is a good way of life to aim for would still stand. Reason is a method to correct for human error and bias, after all, the error and bias we all have, no matter what Ji function we use.

Type insofar as it can even be said to be a real thing is a classfication of emergent qualities, not a hard measure you can get in an instrument. 

As much as I’d want to figure this out, there comes a point where you just have to like step back and put it in context.  it’s just a personality test/ little tool to facilitate communication in which “maybe this or that” is more helpful than nothing. 

Striving for it despite not being handed talent at birth is all the more worthwhile - and if reason was only for certain kinds of people what’s the point of it? Regardless of what tropes people associate with “science” or “logic”, what they actually are by definition are simple basic methods.

Last but not least there was a moment

Soo, existential crisis. At least they can’t doubt that I’m a melancholic or an oldham ideosyncraticXD

Then,  my doubt crumbled away to the “ mostly sure, dont think it could be anything else but im not omnicient” levels at which it was before.

What happened? Well, a rare event:

Well, I went outside and talked to people.

I visited my folks, saw new places, got into a few unscripted situations in other words. 

I’ve seen one post detailing that INs may mistype because they analyze themselves as a whole, feature in less apparent traits and second-guess their reasoning worrying about bias, noticing what sticks out more than the norm etc.  and so on and that may be it in part but I don’t think it’s only this relatively “noble”, too-much-of-a-good-thing mistake.

- It’s a matter about how we are all about ~extrapolating~ from data and using multiple data points and less about decisiveness and practicality. We brood away endlessly trying to come up with interpretations and conceptualizations that makes all the data points fit rather than just going with what they themselves largely seem to suggest. 

One good description I once heard is that Intuitives think in networks while Sensors think in puzzle pieces - I went overboard trying to build ever more complex networks instead of going “Yeah, with all the puzzle pieces so far it’s probably this.”. 

Sometimes the latter approach can be incomplete and miss game changing interconnections - but just as often, the former gets convoluted and therefore, both uselessly vague and too far removed from the actual data its meant to interpret. 

Aaaand, well, almost every sentence I said was “Did you know that...?” or “I think so/ don’t think so because of [observation followed by possible deduction].

Sure, I could be biased in my observation or unconsciously “doing it on purpose to appear a certain way” even if I don’t think I am or care about that, , but some critical mass of “doing it on purpose” would itself be equivalent with 5 (or a 3)

I was a little afraid one time; I reacted by withdrawing and looking at the whole thing as an observatrion and it was a highly temporary thing. And as much as I complain about Fe users playing police, I may have been guilty of one moment of overreacting, unwanted/socially-chiding “help” myself there. (The person perhaps justly called me a know-it-all. They were wrong about one thing but I may have handled it all more constructively) I repeatedly expressed vague undifferentiated preferrences that were closer to analyzing what factors were at work rather than having clear like/dislike reasons readily available. .

I critiqued a TV show (myself and the local INTJ annoying all the non-NTs with our loud, animated critiquing ) and a big factor to being unabvle to enjoy it fully was the lack of High-Concept abstract sci fi content and mostly the lack of consistency - normally a lot of my enjoyment would come from extrapolatinmg and deducing what the world is like and how it, the themes and charactzers “work”, but here I coulnd do that because it was tacked onto a ‘verse it did not fit into. I observed how said INTJ and I reacted to us correcting each other on small things with like a brief thanks or apology & just moving on whilst similar things had gotten annoyed snarks out of our otherwise patient Feeler sister...

The nails in the coffin were those 2 tumblr posts, one about differences in how Fi and low Fe argue (the latter pile including 3 phrases I used verbatim in the last discussion with my SO just hours earlier) and a post by the afore mentioned “resonable poster” about, as she called it “oversharing in soc variants vs soc blinds” though the correct amount of sharing might well be in the eye of the beholder.

But that was the one objection of the troll I didn’t have a non-vague satisfactory reply to, what rly kept me wondering rather than “eh not gonna reinvent the wheel again”, something about “sp/sx woldn’t have long descriptions or emo rants” Apparently they do when they never have to dea with the person again (such as on the internets. )

IDK I did move the description so no one’s forced to read it but lots of peeps have one (This is like... a blogging site??) but the reasons for its existence had more to do with “completionist urges related to then-current obsession (typology)” and “So I like X, bite me.” sort of sentiment than whatever it was they presuposed. 

Dear Causal-Deterministic peeps (ENTP, INFP, ISTP, ESFP): Instances of the same behavior can be caused by different causes! Look at this: 2 4 8.

What’s the pattern? - Could be “powers of 4″.  Could also be “even numbers” or even “any increasing integer”. 

Of course this whole mess is an example of where we H-P folks (INTP, ENFP, ISFP, ESTP) look at everything from multiple angels/Povs, (”Is it like this? Is it lika that? It COULD be seen this other way...”) rather than, well, decide which ones are most relevant here/ “Pick one”. At least the SPs have Se to “just grab one” or whatever it is they do. 

Whereas we just stand there speculating XD The ENFPs sorta do it too but in a whole different way/ area of life? 

Me: “Either he is nuts or I am nuts because we can’t both be telling the truth!”

ENFP: “Well I empasize with both of you so I don’t think either of you is nuts?”

Me: Sorry but this is a real dichotomy here for once. If he dun nothing wrong, then I would be wrong for accusing him thus, just as he says..

ENFP: Can we all agree to disagree and chil maybe? plz??

Might also be why there`s this overlap between ENFPs and Universalists? Though obviously not all ENFPs are universalists and vice versa. 

So yeah. Kinda comical in hindsight. I started out all second guess-ey and entertaining both possibilities in parallel but in the end, well, I do think it’s INTP after all, at least, I’d say its the most probable by a considerable margin. Most definitely 5 tho. For all the occasionall 4 ness its by far the most overwhelming tendency in day to day life/thinking ugh cant I NOT spew nerd facts about everything in sight. What are other conversaton topics? 

Bottom Line: By thinking about your own thinking you alter your thinking, and that way lie 2nd order chaotic systems, the Uncertainty Principle and Goedel’s Theorem...

So going outside both threw me out of that recursion and added new, raw data as a means to test the competing hypotheses. It forced me to see what I actually act like by and large in a natural setting rather than the many ways I could interpret or read the way I act like, which like, is not actually all that mysterious lol

[sl-c]

thoughts {5.8.17}

woah my birthday is so soon & I haven’t really organised anything accept what I’m wearing, but man I hope I’m not on my period that would be a real bummer; my outfit is so bomb & slay & just omg, I will look so dressed up when I’m out but I couldn’t give a fk it’s gonna be so lit

can’t believe how sick I am right now. Over the last 5 years or so I have rarely got sick, but when I do I get it real bad & I just feel so gross & weak. I haven’t been able to go to the gym or even do yoga in a few days & it makes me so sad I miss it so much. Annoyingly I can’t tell if I’m getting better or worse either. 

I use to be so petrified of doctors/medical stuff - literally to the point of shaking just to visit my GP - but I’ve come so far & now I have no problem!! I actually had a really good appointment yesterday where I got all this stuff sorted & organised that I needed to, including getting a proper breast check up (everything was fine), blood test referral etc etc. Did some real good medical adult-ing yesterday. I was also so relieved because I was really worried I had a high chance of damaging my fertility from this incident that happened, but she reassured me that it was actually super unlikely given the circumstances & symptoms etc etc & I cannot tell you how much better that made me feel 

I was so worried I would be too sick to go to this event last night but I freshened myself up & had such a good time !! Got my hair done, met some nice people & just soaked up the good vibes. I honestly just love being around people, chatting & giving happy vibes :)

stoked to be working on posters to print & sell, it would be really good for this to become a long-term thing, but man it is a little stressful organising it all & being vulnerable through my art making; so ready for this new exciting chapter in my life though

really need to feed my plant Esmerelda

I love that I have such an interactive community online, I love that people I don’t know or hardly know reach out, whether that’s for a chat or some advice about something personal, it honestly means so much to me & I’m so happy that people know they can trust me & feel comfortable around me; I just love people & helping people. 

so proud of myself for eating the best I’ve ever eaten 

my bum is coming along so well!! I’m so proud, I was always so against squatting (I considered myself allergic for years), but now I’ve decided I want to really work on myself physically, which has included squatting, & I actually love it! I’ve got such a good combination of fitness activities at the moment & I love it

really need to order some more makeup online 

need to buy some more 2nd hand books to read. I’ve been back walking on the treadmill so have been churning through the books at a rate

I’ve not been drinking enough water this last week

I had such a vivid romantic dream with him the other night & I feel all mushy about it haha

also despite the relatively extensive collection I already I have I had a really strong desire to go lingerie shopping as of last night. I went with a friend a few days ago though & it realy dawned on me how there aren't that many places in aus/sydney & the ones we do have aren’t that great in my opinion (more specialised stuff). However, have to say was really intrigued by the flavoured/edible lube honey birdette had, it smelled so insanely legit like what is that made of

omg I haven’t been in the ocean in almost a week I think wtf, but also sick so not sure it’s the best idea/I seriously don’t have energy to even move in my house let alone swim

I actually love winter & the cold, I don’t know how I’m going to survive the insane hot of summer

current food loves: kale, spinach, mushrooms, zucchini, rock melon, bananas

things that are making me really happy: music, going out to eat with him, art making, seeing friends, styling nice outfits, being out all the time (when I’m not sick), doing things on my own (adult-ing), talking openly, meeting people, being creative on social media 

can’t believe I re-infected myself

I’ve not slept properly all week & it is definitely not helping

I just want to go out & get on with life but I’m so sick; I literally don’t even have the energy to do my art

can’t believe I’m going to be painting my mate’s wall & so many people have contacted me about designing them tattoos, so crazy & also scary 

so funny that I use to loathe candles with a passion & had such a huge collection that I discarded, but now I love them

so nice to connect with people on a spiritual level

I miss my yoga so bad :(

getting so into fashion atm & I love it omg; my current collection is so awesome I can’t even; I just wish I could figure out a really good layout spread for when renovations come around. I reaaaaally want something special for my lingerie but can’t find anything remotely close to what I’m thinking 

the weather has been so nice lately

I just feel like walking around shops, not buying anything but just looking at stuff

sushi trains are bomb.com

would love some cool new yoga gear

I need to fix my instagram content it’s just so all over the place 

need to go to talk to the fam, think later

[coldsoupy]

Freakbag - Full Interview

Providence art/noise/eclectica duo FreakBag has made a name for themselves over the past two years playing live every chance they get in state, out of state, wherever the freaks are. With a brash yet cleansing simplicity to their Fat Piggy EP, FreakBag offers a collection of sayings, turns of phrase, blips, scratches, riffs, and lo-fi drum machines that remains something altogether refreshingly different. Not trying to be anything other than itself, FreakBag works to make themselves an entity built for experience over studio sounds.

I featured Freakbag in the June music column of Providence Monthly.

The following is the unedited interview with Hana Ko and Johnny Sneeze:

Hana Ko and Johnny Sneeze

PHOTOGRAPHY BY SAVANNAH BARKLEY FOR PROVIDENCE MONTHLY

Q: Freakbag has a psychedelic, art-rock, noise appeal that captures the spirit of Lou Reed or Hella. What do you think it is liberating to play genre-defying music that doesn't necessarily conform to anything in particular? 

Hana Ko: The fact that we aren't stuck in one particular genre is the fun part! We don't have any rules. If we want to try out a sound, we can. We get to do whatever we want!

Johnny Sneeze: I think what is most liberating is exactly that; not being tied to any one particular sound. Personally I get tired of hearing anything that always stays the same, so I like being in a band like Freakbag where we have the creative room to do whatever we feel like.

Q: Your lyrics walk the same line as magical realism walking a line that is either absurd or highly profound. Where do your lyrics fall into the writing process? Do you write your lyrics to fit the music? Or do you write your lyrics separately and put the two together?

Hana Ko: I write mostly all the lyrics. Usually things I find funny, or word combinations that make me laugh. With the first ep, the lyrics were mostly made up of catchphrases from my dad, or bizarre things my mom would sing to me as a kid. I reworked them to fit into our songs. With the new Ep, the words are pretty descriptive of situations I've been in or some dark/ odd interactions I've had. The repetition is something I think helps paint the mental images I'm going for.

Johnny Sneeze: Hana writes almost all of the lyrics,and most of the time they're out on top of something that we're already doing and see if they fit.

Q: What is the creative process behind the music? Fat Piggy is lo-fi drum machine driven with a variety of guitar tones and electronic elaboration, but all very minimal. What goes into creating the music? Is it treated almost as a soundscape with your words added or do you create together?

Hana Ko: Our writing process is usually pretty on the spot and in the moment. We get together and the songs usually just pop out and we go with whatever feels right.

Johnny Sneeze: I'm not sure if there really is a whole lot to the creative process, haha. We usually go into our practice space and start playing something, and it works most of the time. That spontaneity is something that we like to bring to our love shows. There are a good amount of our songs that have a level of improvisation in them.

Q: How is the recording of your new album different from the recording of Fat Piggy? Did you go into a studio or is it self-recorded? Do you record live? Or do you layer the various sounds and vocals?

Hana Ko: We recorded both albums with our pal Joe Bazydlo in Connecticut.  We don't add a ton of effects or anything. I think the recordings stay true to how we actually sound which is super important to us.

Johnny Sneeze: We recorded the new album identically to Fat Piggy, the only difference really being that we had a few new pieces of equipment. It was recorded at our friend's house in CT, dubbed "the Cigarette Factory." All the songs were recorded separately and layered together.

Q: Freakbag plays out live very often. Do you view yourselves as a live band first with some recorded songs? Or do you see yourselves as a recording band that plays your songs live? 

Hana Ko: We are 100% a live band first and foremost!Most of the reason we started Freakbag was so that we could play shows! It's way more about the experience and performance for us, the actual tunes being secondary. I think it's about being in the moment and feeling that raw energy.  I sometimes see bands play who look bored, and I really wanted Freakbag to just be about fun. So our goal was to have an entertaining live show, I love to jump around and freak out and yell. That doesn't really come across the same way on the albums.

Johnny Sneeze: I definitely feel like we are a live band first. The recordings are a fun document, but I think the feeling of our live show isn't always there.

Q: All of your songs on Fat Piggy are very short and concise. What does writing short music do that is lost in longer songs?

Hana Ko: I don't have the attention span for long songs or long sets for that matter. We like to keep it simple, short, catchy and to the point. I thinks it's fun to be like "what's that? What's happening!?" And then its abruptly over ! Haha.

Johnny Sneeze: Once you get the point across there isn't too much else you need to do. It's also fun to write a bunch of new songs all at once, which is more achievable with shorter songs.

Q: Freakbag kind of strikes me as a celebration of some kind. What are you guys celebrating? 

Hana Ko: We are celebrating definitely! It's crazy to me that I can yell about pigs, and dance around and not get made fun of. It's a celebration of all the freaks! 

Johnny Sneeze: Being your own weird selves! Not conforming to anything and getting what you want for yourself out of life.

Q: Who are the people in your band? Where are you playing live in the month of June (when the article comes out)? When and where can people find the new album?

Hana Ko: Hana Ko and Johnny Sneeze. It's always just been us as a duo! The new cassette will be available at shows! 

Johnny Sneeze: This band is made up of Hana Ko and Johnny Sneeze at the moment, hopefully we might be able to expand at some point. You can find the new album on our bandcamp page or pick up a tape at one of our shows.

Q: Any fun live stories from the world of Freakbag? Be vivid.

Hana Ko: My favorite story is from we went on tour last fall. We get to Friendship Mountain in Jersey and it's been raining for days like torrential downpours. The place is a little basement spot and water had been coming down hard into the bulkhead and there are these huge puddles in there. It didn't matter, everyone still piled in all soaking wet. There were some electrical issues going on at this point and things were zapping. So when it came time for our set we had to reconfigure our setup a little so my mic wouldn't shock me! Haha anyways, we start playing and our pal John Guttschall, who puts on the shows there, starts freaking out during our 1st song and dives right into this massive puddle! He started like swimming/ dancing/ thrashing around and he's totally soaked in this puddle. It was wild.but it got everyone excited and splashing around more. Definitely a memorable night! 

Johnny Sneeze: I think out of our live shows, one of my favorite memories was playing in front of a bunch of little kids at the Ricky Rainbow show at Black Box. We were asked to play one song, and we hung around the show until It was time for us to play. It was really awesome seeing a bunch of young'uns really digging our song and dancing around while their parents sat in chairs and kind of looked annoyed. We were even drawn as cartoons for a little coloring book they made for all of the kids.

You can find Freakbag’s music here.

[thebandcampdiaries]

An Interview with POMAGRANITE:

We had the opportunity to chat with the members of Pomagranite, a new, exciting group with a unique approach to production and songwriting. Check out our recent article about them at this link.

I love how you manage to render your tracks so personal and organic. Does the melody come first, or do you focus on the beat the most?

Everett Gibbons: usually beat first then melody and then finally the verses but we handle it differently on every song, whatever comes naturally

Della Kinetic: Everything I create flows out by feeling. If I hear a beat and I’m feeling a melody or a hook, I work on that to start. If I’m feeling like I got bars to spit, I start with that. As far as making beats goes it’s kind of separate from writing lyrics. I make a lot of beats, sometimes I forget about them for months or years and write to them when I come across them again.

Joeyroxitt: melody for sure, but I have to get in tune with the beat first.

Bryll: I think it will totally depend on the mood of the session. What's been going on in everyone's head that day. A lot of the stuff that we make is on a beat produced by either Mixwelh or myself if we didn't make it together. MixwelH will crank beats out left and right so he might make a pack over the week and play for us to write to. Most of the time when we get in the studio together everything starts with a blank session. I start from scratch with the guys in the studio and quickly build from there based on the vibe. Everett and Della might start writing and the cadence of something from them will inspire the beat to go in a different direction or start arranging and seeing the song take shape. I think that might be a big thing that sets us apart from other artists. We've got a pretty solid team of key players and everyone knows the roll. The key to our tracks being personal and organic is having the ability to have everyone in the same room PHYSICALLY together and to start things organically. I constantly remind myself that the vocals are going to be one of the last elements that get recorded in the session. Get to a good spot where you can vibe on the same loop and take a break. Start adding in the last instrument, vocals, and then finish building the song AROUND that. The best songs are the perfect combination of producer and artist...we work together and its all love. We throw ideas around all the time. Some are great and some are fucking terrible when we keep pushing each other the personal and organic vibe continues to show.

CharlieMixwelH: It all really depends on the moment. Whatever I have an idea for when I go to create. But if I really had to pick I would say I usually start with the melody. I feel like that's an easier way for me to create the vibe of the track and then once I have that going I can start to hear how the drums should sound.

Do you perform live? If so, do you feel more comfortable on a stage or within the walls of the recording studio?

Everett Gibbons: I definitely feel comfortable on stage. the studio is more about precision and getting your best take, while performing is more about your passion and communicating with a crowd

Della Kinetic: Yes I do perform. As far as being comfortable it all depends on energy & headspace. Recording and performing are two completely different animals. They’re both super fun, but they’re also both work. As long as I’m in the proper headspace I’m just as comfortable while performing as I am while recording.

Joeyroxitt: I’m just getting my stage legs, so in the studio for sure. I love performing live it’s a weird feeling, a different type of high.

Bryll: We do perform live and I love to perform. I also love being behind the computer at the studio. Even if we do a show I stand with mixy while he DJs and control the audio for the mics. maybe its the production side of me, I don’t know. The blunts and slippers vibe is much different than the stage vibe.

CharlieMixwelH: I don't perform per se, but I'm the DJ for POMAGRANITE, so if you call that performing then yeah. I'm definitely more comfortable in the studio, creating, but it never gets old playing our music for a crowd of people.

If you could only pick one song to make a “first impression” on a new listener, which song would you pick and why?

Everett Gibbons: Man, a lot of this new stuff we're about to drop would make a good first impression, we just gotta drop it first haha

Della Kinetic: Every listener is important to me and every person is unique in song preference. So this one is tough. If I had to choose I would probably go with “Talk” from my 2017 album “Scatterbrain”. That’s just one of my personal favorites.

Joeyroxitt: well at the moment I only have one single that’s out. The rest is group music so I would have to say Netflixxx but the group stuff is what I’m focused on right now

Bryll: If I were to share one solo song it would be "People Up" featuring Everett. It was the first song I produced/wrote/sang/recorded/mixed/mastered/released on all platforms. I had been working on music for a while leading up to that. Shout out ViN wya, one of my best friends who was the one who pushed me to continue making beats and then writing and recording. Then I linked back up with Everett and did his "Pomagranite Music" album that sparked the whole idea of Pomagranite Records. "People Up" reminds me of who was there motivating me leading up to Pomagranite Records

CharlieMixwelH: My one pick would be one of our unreleased songs "rest". It just has a different vibe to it and everyone really did something different than what is normally expected from their music. I also produced it.

What does it take to be “innovative” in music?

Everett Gibbons: being innovative means not being afraid to make something a little more unorthodox or different than people are used to hearing.

Della Kinetic: Involvement. Be heavily involved in the area of music in which you want to innovate. Not so much as to copy or replicate the artists around you, but to soak it all in. Soak in what the music means to you, and spit it back out with your own, dope sound. Also life experiences, everybody’s life is extremely unique. BE YOU!

Joeyroxitt: just not trying to overthink things. Get into your good mind space and write.

Bryll: Might sound dumb but I think in order to be innovative you need to truly be creative. Creative in a way that you're not trying to think outside the box... creative in a way that you realize there is no box other than the one you put yourself in. FUCK THE RULES. Music is a listening/feeling process. If it feels good why second guess it? The definition of insanity is trying the same thing over and over again while expecting different results. Try new things. Don't be scared... those are happy accidents. Shout out, Bob Ross.

Any upcoming release or tour your way?

Answer:

Everett Gibbons: I'm just focused on making music right now, shows and tour are sure to come later this year. we have the Treatment dropping mid-February as well

Della Kinetic: Releases... As a unit, the team and I have a LOT of content on the way. The POMAGRANITE stuff is scheduled and set to be announced. As far as solo joints, I have quite a few things brewing for this year. Shows... No tour yet, but we do have a few shows booked for the next couple of months.

Joeyroxitt: couple shows around the corner and tour this summer!

Bryll: Our new EP "The Treatment" should be here mid-February. I'm excited for people to hear this new shit because I feel like we broke down some of those walls and just did what felt good. We'll see!

CharlieMixwelH: We have a POMAGRANITE RECORDS album coming out very soon!

Anywhere online where curious fans can listen to your music and find out more about you?

Answer:

Everett Gibbons: @everett_gibbons on Instagram but you can stream my music everywhere by googling Everett gibbons

Della Kinetic: All my music is available on pretty much every relevant streaming/downloading service. Spotify, Apple, iTunes, Soundcloud, YouTube, Tidal, etc. Just search “Della Kinetic”. I’m also very interactive on Instagram & Snapchat and I welcome listeners to engage! IG: @della_kinetic Snap: @dellakinetic

Joeyroxitt: on all social media platforms @Joeyroxitt

Bryll: Follow me on Instagram or any social media @bryhoss. I love Instagram though. BRYLL is on all platforms Spotify apple music you name it. Reach out I'm always down to collaborate with some different brains.

CharlieMixwelH: On all streaming services search POMAGRANITE for all the music from the label, and look out for new releases from Charlie MixwelH on streaming as well.

Find out more:

https://linktr.ee/pomagranite_records

Instagram handles:

@pomagranite_records

@everett_gibbons

@della_kinetic

@joeyroxitt

@bryhoss

@mr.mixwelh