#Inspiring me to jump back on!
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quick pupysona design adjustment
#furry#a doodley#i love. black + rainbow. white + rainbow. and neutral + rainbow#i saw a dark brown and white and rainbow plush and was gonna make an adopt inspired by it#but i was like wait. i like this i want it for me.#couldnt decide if he shld be more orange or red but smunker always jumps between peach salmon and purple pink so its okey#kind of a wip bc i think the rainbow looks sloppy but i dont like doing smooth gradients...#+ i didnt know if i shld add his darker patterns back...#i think less is more especially with my own fursonas#he'd look really boring with clothes on (no flowers!) so maybe i will add the dark fur back onto the awrms
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it’ll be okay
#mission impossible#benji dunn#ethan hunt#benthan#saw the trailer and i JUMPED to draw smth inspired by it#we got a forehead touch#all we need now is a hug#i just need them to be okay :’(#i love them so bad#but benthan nation we are so fucking back oh my god#a benthan hug could fix me
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all this darkwing duck stuff ur reblogging is making me want to continue watching the show 😭😭😭
you should. we have pirate launchpad in a crop top
#asks#yaikat#i’m so glad i’ve inspired you LAWL please let me know if you jump back into it!#no id#darkwing duck
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sometimes i go somewhere by myself and shut the door and put my headphones in and turn my music up as loud as itll go and dance as big and frantic as i want for about 30 minutes to an hour and then when im done the world looks beautiful again but it always does make me kinda sad because i shouldnt have to dance with my earbuds in the bathroom
#i feel like i NEVER get to dance cause i dont know HOW to dance. so i just look stupid and silly when i do#but it feels so. i dont know. dancing is a level 10 autism event for me when i really get into it#thats why shows with big music numbers are always so fun to do. when i got to do DOA in lightning thief !?!?!? my god#i even got to dance briefly in magic tower ... with flailing arm movements and jumps ... to a song about naked ladies on the moon .....#whatever this is just me being wistful. i just wanna danceeeeee i wanna dance somewhere loud with someone other than myself#hello world#<- song that inspired this post btw was caterpillars of the commonwealth. its so groovy#that trumpet solo????? GOOD god i accidentally bumped into the sink several times#(eyes closed limbs thrashing about wildly head whipping back and forth)
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ITS DANCE TIME 🩰
#i havent been very active lately and keep meaning to get some sort of habit started now that im chillin a lot more#and ive been trying to tell myself to dance specifically!#i love it more than basic exercises and stretches/barre is a very non-intimidating place to start#and will get me back into the swing of more intense moves easily#i finished my ballet au art in the hopes it would inspire me and then i still kept putting it off#but for real this time!!! im doing it!!!#i dont think i brought my pointe shoes to the apartment but i have my slippers :3#i dont know if id want to jump right into pointe to be fair asdfsdf#*transforms into a magical girl ballerina and blasts my depression away with a massive pink laser beam*#thats not whats going to happen but by god am i going to try rn 😂#rose rambles
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getting an mri tomorrow (i have being waiting a year for this)
#its mainly just for my shoulder/general back area because sometimes they hurt a lottttttttttt like i lift my arm and it feels like ive been-#stabbed yk 😭😭 its strange#so fun amazing wonderful inspirational life changing fact about me is 2 years ago i got a MAJOR surgery done on rhe full length of my spine#which. was an experience. definitely didn't cause me a lot of pain (I CAN'T EVEN JUMP ANYMORE)#brutus rambles
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just reflecting today on the 7th poured drink tonight and recalling how when i was venting to my co-workers about yesterday and the panic attack i had and all that, she mentioned how I needed more help when I was drowning and i swear to you the immediate thing that came to mind when she said that was alan wake
#i haven't really made many drowning gifs have i#also i feel bad cause like. god#this is so stupid and convoluted and part of the guilt i'm carrying right now#our customer service department ended up being the straw that broke my back and made me have that panic attack/meltdown yesterday#and i try#i TRY SO HARD to have some empathy towards them cause i mean#they're the ones getting basically abused by our customers#and it hurts so much to me that i can't be more help#and specifically the situation yesterday was me having to jump in and finish something that idk took me all of ten minutes to do#after i asked for some forklift assistance that took maybe like half an hour#but i had asked my employees to get that done *last week* and they couldn't do it#and the poor customer service rep had to escalate it to the director of sales which she flaunted in myf ace#and i felt terrible when i snapped and said 'ok i'll drop everything i'm doing to help you'#when i did legit have a million other things i needed to do#i'm honest to god tempted to rate myself as unsuccessful this year just cause like#i've been having to do my own employee's jobs which is also my fault for maybe not being firm like i need to be#but anyway her saying how i was drowning of course made me think of alan which honestly made me feel a little better#cause i mean it's like nick right#if alan could get out of the dark place even though it took him 13 years maybe i can too#and also inspiring in the way that like. alan needed help and i probably need help too#i've gone to therapy twice once in person and once online and like nick it's just...#not my thing#but something both therapists seemed to concur upon was that my support system isn't the best and i also need to work on myself#and love myself and lmao that's soooooo much easier said than done#but anyway i'm sorry i should get a real diary or somethin but#something about the formatting of tagging like this is weirdly comforting
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kunikida but he sleepwalks and every year around the anniversary of the azure king case for like a week or so his sleepwalking becomes violent
at first no one knows how to handle it. if left unchecked he was aggressive at best and physically violent at worst. they don't understand what's happening right away and kind of just chalks it up to bad memories and tries to give him his space. knkd himself knows he sleepwalks but isn't particularly aware of spike of violence while sleepwalking until ranpo or something bring it up nonchalantly a few months later
it isn't until after Dazai joins and tries waking him up (resulting in a Bad case of confusion arousal and maybe him getting even physically attacked) that they all realize just how bad it is and decide to do something about this
so now every year around the anniversary of the case everyone pays close attention to Kunikida, making sure he gets plenty of rest, eats well, stays hydrated to help limit how much he sleepwalks
on the anniversary of the actual day (when it's worst), they'll arrange a little agency sleepover together where they'll all spend a night together in one place and just all be there for him to make sure he (and everyone else) stays safe in the night and guide him back should he get up and start sleep walking
#inspired by this one time my sibling slept-sprinting into my room jumped right beside my bed and stared down at me while muttering threats#in their sleep - (guided em back to bed and we were both ok But Man that was Intense)#and also by just all the other times I've helped them when I found em wondering around-#and my own?? annual nightmare ??#(I have the same nightmare I have around the same time halloween each year and I do not know why ough)#anyway more characters should sleep walk /talk /have sleep related disorders in general-#I wonna see a character handle sleep paralysis cuz its funky af KFHFJH I am such a sleep paralysis kinda guy#WAI TKJFFJKH unstoppable force (sleep-running sibling) vs immovable object (sleep paralysis guy) who will win FJHFK#we're not even biologically related why do we both have sleep issues </3#kite watches bsd#bsd#kunikida doppo
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It always seems like such a good idea in the moment (Patreon)
The first four are in reference to a great idea I had of - since I’ve finished my lower-limit page number testing for making books; shorter fics take up less page space, and just increasing the font size isn’t as handsome! - simply making a mini book! All it would take would be to halve the pages again, right? Just cut them right down the middle! Easy peasy!
As I’m sure you can tell by the second, no. Not easy peasy. Difficult painful un-fun >:(
Obviously I still did it tho! What do you take me for, someone who could have the idea of an even tinier book and then not do something about it?? No It’s also the only one so far to have a paper bookmark rather than a ribbon!
All told it’s a bit smaller than your average manga (I love the monochrome covers on these under their dust jackets haha <3) - you can see even with effectively doubling up the pages by halving their size, it was still very small-spined!
A quick shot while it was still being made hehe ♪ It’s Out! Paired here - and the earlier one, just without its dust jacket haha - with my Zarla SC2 collection (ft. Family, Negotiations are Going...Well, and With No Obligation) - I absolutely kicked myself after the fact for not including Out as the run-up to everything, I was really trying to make a full collection in probably-chronological order! Out would’ve been a perfect start! And it only would’ve taken like four pages!!
Ah well, it was still quite a learning experience - I probably wouldn’t make another standalone of under 4k-ish just for formatting reasons but I did get some good ideas of how to do so if I wanted to! Although, my next project is going to be even more of a formatting nightmare........I’ll get there when I get there! Lol
#Doodles#The impulsive thoughts are always the funnest! But then it's all a matter of actually putting them into reality...#Ahh well like I said under the cut it was a learning experience! And I really wanted a physical copy of Out haha ♪#I don't think I've ever mentioned it - not even in my pre-fic notes :0 - but Out was another one of my inspirations for Drinking Game#I mean - the drinking lol obviously but I hadn't considered what VUX drinking would be like before reading it :)#I wanted to pair it with both physical copies hehe ♫ I'm happy I attempted it! And I have a better foundation to build on in the future!#I ended up using the scrap leftover from making such a small cover as the bookmark haha - and I picked the covers so they'd almost-match :)#They go together! But not quite! Just enough!#The sting of creation has worn off - it's actually been a while since I've made a quick book! - so the itch is starting to come back haha#Well - almost lol - the formatting is still........but I do want to do it! Especially now that I've got a hand-in-hand hobby to go with it#All that later ♪ For now snakes!#And also spiders I am also the same when spiders#I've been escorting a lot of spiders outside lately and pretty much all of them fall under the moniker of ''darling'' to me lol#Still no luck on finding a jumping spider :( But I also haven't got an enclosure set up yet either#There's this one booth that always has such adorable and pretty jumping spider enclosures ahhh I might have to break and get one someday#Same place where I got to hold the snake in fact! :D She was a love <3 Beautiful full-grown female cornsnake if memory serves#She was rather wiggly - she was tired and fussy and didn't feel like being handled by a stranger but she was so polite about it#A real delight to handle <3 And I got to see her babies! So cute and tiny!#The rest is more SCII fic stuff haha ♪ Rereading the Pirate fic was a lot of fun :) Intentionally avoiding Vargas fic(s) does make me a bit#Well I really like Vargas still lol it is candy to my brain so any gesture even remotely in that direction is very exciting haha#I'm perfectly happy with the rest for now tho! I have plenty of things to read and make! >:3c#Heck there's still a SCII fic I haven't read yet that I want to!! I just have to get all my previous SCII thoughts out of my head first haha#I will tho >:3c Always always ♪♫#SCII
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God is whatever we want him to be, I think
Cracks of thunder in a storm
The raindrops left on flowers
Or the petrichor in the air that follows
I found a jumping spider recently
They're the only type of spider I can handle
I let her crawl into my hand
She was never aggressive, just curious
Sometimes defensive
Raising her legs in a threat display if my other fingers moved too fast near her
And I can understand why
To see something so incomprehensibly large
Something that could kill you with an errant twitch
It must be frightening.
I was still nervous handling her
I'd been bitten before and wasn't eager to experience it again
But I let her crawl around
And I felt her little barbed paws grip onto my skin
There is a certain level of trust involved when handling animals
Trusting that they won't attack
It is impossible to tell them your intentions are good
The spiders can't know what we're thinking
So when we move too fast or twitch because their fur tickles
It's understandable that they feel threatened
After all, they can't understand what we are
They just continue crawling
But we could kill them so easily
I wonder if spiders believe in God?
#a poem about spiders#idk man i Just woke up i dreamt abkut spiders and felt inspired#im going back to bed#if you have a pet jumping spider send me pictures theyre so gd cute i love them#poetry
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my good people, hello. i might have icons.
#𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐲.「 out of character. 」#i will be sincere that i am not really sure of how i made the base of icons but i still like it. just i'm not super convinced.#still the art of matías bergara is so stunning that it alone makes the icons absolutely perfect#matías bergara is such a big inspiration for me. i have so much to learn from it. </3#anyway. hi hello. i'm hopefully back here too? i'm fixing one blog at the time and i'm so inspired for john it's absurd.#i will fix his carrd since i have to update it a LOT but in the meantime. hello. <3 you can also find me at crownhcart a lot!#dead cells has been holding the braincells lately and i'm liking jumping from muse to muse so you can definitely find me there.
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i really love kick scooters i've been using one to get around instead of walking whenever possible since i was like 10 and i'd like to say i'm fairly good at it but sometimes when i'm hurtling downhill at landscape blurring speeds it does occur to me that i'm gambling my life on 2 metal pipes and 2 wheels small enough to be tripped up by a pebble
#I've only fallen like 3 times i think which imo is pretty impressive with how often i use it. BUT one of#the times was coz i didnt notice a PEACH SEED on the sidewalk and the wheel couldn't get over it and i ate shit#it made me way more cautious about avoiding junk on the road like what the fuck man...#post inspired bc i was going downhill on a sidewalk and had to cross a road so i lifted the#front wheel as per usual when the terrain switches (so the wheel doesn't get caught and trip me) but#somehow i managed to shift my gravity just the right way that I glided across the road just on#the back wheel and the front only touched down once i reached the opposite sidewalk#now I'm sure this is smtg one could do on purpose and I'm also sure it looked cool as hell but DAMN. felt really weird#and im deathly afraid of tripping plus i dont have a trick scooter i always get the#ones w the slightly bigger wheels and wider deck coz i use them to get around not for tricks#i do take them to the skatepark dgmw but im not meant to. no wonder im on like the 4th one by now#it's still like lightweight enough for tricks it's the perfect balance of light enough to jump with but#big enough to be comfortable for long term shit so it's ideal... but like oh my god if this#tiny ass machine snaps im a smear on the pavement#not even machine it's powered by pure leg. device? wikipedia says human powered street vehicle. sure yeah that#barking
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hey uh sorry for disappearing yet again for a couple months. don't have much of an excuse, though things have been more stressful than usual, offline life having involved family and hospitals and stuff, but not gonna go into any details, things are better now either way so ye. my way of coping with things have been mostly to just play games (ffxiv mainly, leveling alts and other grinding can be a good distraction sometimes) and nothing else to keep my mind off things, so haven't been able to focus enough to do much of any art at all. I am hoping to get back into the swing of things, I am back on my meds that I skipped out on for like a year due to various reasons, but they seem to be helping again so yeah, fingers crossed that things will work out and such ha
#also any and all social interaction not offline has been nonexistent due to things and I'm sorry for general unresponsiveness#again hoping to get back to being ever so slightly less antisocial at least sometimes#now that things are mostly calm again hopefully things will get easier in general idk lol#also I did actually doodle yesterday for the first time in like two months#just a random doodle of my viera alt that recently got to shb#he's very special to me and is a very good edgy bunboi bean that's been getting a lot of playtime these past couple months#he's very much a comfort alt based on a certain uhhh vibe that's been so important to me lately so idk felt inspired for once ha#so maybe I'll post that later just to post something idk we'll see#but ye fingers crossed I can get back onto the art train again properly soon#bc really more bombeep is not gonna draw itself and I'll be damned if I'm not letting it die just yet even if everyone else has jumped ship#it's my comfort ship and I do whatever the fuck I want art wise so heck yeah more bombeep soon hopefully ha#but ye anyways laters and such#also unrelated but corpse released a new song recently you should go listen to it#it's very good makes me feel really nostalgic and I dunno why#but ye stream DISDAIN on spotify or yt or something or don't you do you ha#ok laters forreals this time mmbye
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I cannot believe that I FORGOT about the scene in season 7 when Dean walked Charlie through flirting with a MALE security guard. They could’ve done that so many straighter ways. He could have just said “ask him if he goes to the gym” not “what, do you work out with all your free time? It shows, you look amazing.” sir WHAT
#bisexual Dean you will always be canon to me#thank you to my beloved spn mutuals who have been going insane lately & inspired me to jump back on my rewatch#supernatural#dean winchester#charlie bradbury
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been laying here listening to Lucky by Dermot Kennedy on loop for half an hour while thinking about Everything Stays and crying
#it’s good crying dw i am just. i have so many feelings about this story#Seven’s Celestial Commentary#Everything Stays#writing stuff#i may be stuck in bed struggling to type due to personal reasons but that will Not stop me from cooking up ideas for this fic#there is gonna be so much fucking angst and it’s gonna hurt soooooo good#the more i listen to it the more the possibilities expand#i can easily see Moon and Reader going back and forth between verses vulnerably arguing over Sun#but i can also see it being Sun and Moon getting real and discussingcougharguingover Reader#can’t decide which i like more#god i wish y’all could see this story the way it plays out in my head#next best thing would be to keep writing and sharing the story instead of vagueposting abt future plot points tho wouldn’t it lmao#and GOD don’t even get me fucking STARTED on Two Hearts…#Dermot Kennedy’s music is responsible for yet Another plot point for this story and i can’t even be mad about it. his fucking lyricsss dude#‘and so we jump to the THEATER??? in that SAME OLD TOWN???’ DO WE? FUCK I GUESS WE DO NOW!!!#picture me listening to that song and inspiration hitting me like a truck. diligently taking notes like the lyrics r instructions from God#‘she sees his face?? and HE sees HER as the LIGHTS GO DOWN???’ write that down write that down#‘the life that they should’ve had sat between them that night??’ FUCK Man yeah it sure did!!!#anyways it’s chill i’m chill. i’m very normal about my little stories and their musical inspirations!#and i’ve listened to these songs a very normal amount (translation: they will likely be in my top ten for the 2024 wrapped)#(cut to the scenes playing vividly in my head) ‘Well‚ at least I can always say that I /told/ her!’#‘I can’t relate to having a heart like that‚ Sun! With all of your wonder and your trust intact…’#like no i wouldn’t lift the lyrics directly for the song to use as dialogue but FUCk does it work well.. Lucky is such a good script for-#like- a heated conversation between my Relentlessly Positive Sun and my Apathetic Jaded Moon#‘How could our farewell mean as much as our time? Honey‚ I’ll be gone. It’s better if I’m something that you leave behind.’#‘I used to paint these trees‚ now I just scream at the sky. Honey I was wrong. Guess there’s certain things you never leave behind.’#*sobbing shaking throwing up clawing at the walls* I Am Normal About These Characters#anyways uh. on an unrelated note how many song lyrics do ya think i can cram into ES before it’s Too Many#gonna have to start getting creative with how i can incorporate more songs in a way that feels natural and not forced#even tho i am forcing it. i am forcing it very much bc i have songs with applicable lyrics and y’all Will read them one way or another
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@pains-illusions is up to NO GOOD...
It's a good thing she's strapped down in her seat otherwise Khare would be thrashing around like a fish on the end of a hook. She'd never liked the dentist but at least they knew what they were doing. Dr. Green on the other hand... her eyes narrow in dislike as the good doctor busies himself with his tools and despite her anger at him hushing her as though she were a fussy child, it quickly fizzles out against the cold knot of dread coiling up in her belly. "Loosen these straps a little and I'll fucking show you hush." Khare hisses in response. It's a bad idea to provoke him, she knows but her biting words are the only source of comfort she's got. Her pupils are dilated with fear, blue eyes almost looking black in the intensity of her emotions despite the brightness emitted by the overhead florescent ring. It's too hot, too bright and only makes him look scarier, hovering close by with a dental probe in hand. Talk about out of the frying pan and into the fire. Her time with Prometheus had been bad but at least she'd been locked up the majority of the time, taken out only for injections before throwing her back into her cell. Dr. Green was more... hands on in his approach, endlessly inquisitive about his new test subject and ruthlessly determined to extract every iota of information about her he possibly could. In the short time she'd been in his so-called care, he'd learned more about her biology than those who'd mutated her, the good doctor having the irritatingly good foresight not only to restrain her heavily but to adorn himself in protective gear on the off-chance she did manage to free a limb somehow. Maybe she was wrong to hate dentists. Clearly it was doctors who deserved her ire more. She flinches at the feel of his hand on her chin, expecting pain for her insolence or at the very least for him to dig his fingers into her flesh as a warning. Pain would come soon enough anyway considering the reason she was here, Khare's eyes darting back and forth as she looks from his ones of icy blue to the weapon glinting wickedly in his hand. "Wouldn't you like to know?" Khare mutters, her lips curled in a mocking sneer. Again, it's a bad idea to taunt him but it's all the power she has, holding onto this crumb of information he wants. Of course he wants to know about the teeth growing next to her eye, budding incisors dangerously close to touching the organ. The skin and flesh surrounding such areas were so delicate, making it easy for a bored and unhappy test subject to scratch away at healthy tissue until it became a habit of self-harm. A sudden smirk crosses her features as she coyly looks up at him from her restraints. "I'll tell you though, but it's a secret. Lean over a little closer and let me whisper into your ear..." Khare says, her voice trailing off into a whisper. She doubts he'd actually do it but figures it's worth a try, if she can get William close enough to bite - anything to get back at his smug face whatever way she can.
#pains-illusions#;; threads#gore tw#torture tw#medical procedure tw#dentist tw#Thank you for the lovely starter I jumped on it like a rat on a biscuit#If there's anything that needs changing just let me know#And thanks again for this William is a treat!#A nasty and awful treat <3#Don't feel obliged to match length this all came tumbling out suddenly#Kicking muse back into inspiration
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