#Im sure if i give it a year I'll be better able to read it alone again

[rosegardenyearning]

Uncertainty

I'm unsure what to do with my copy of Dracula.

I can't pick it up to read alone now, it doesn't feel right or proper when we started it up together.

But I sincerely doubt we'll ever be able to continue it at this rate.

[curvykittyyssmutfics]

Oh what about a cheating smut fic where tony is married to pepper and he starts to have a sexual affair towards his daughter morgan's hot babysitter, reader

Babygirl

Friday, 4pm

I check the time on my dainty Cartier watch, walkin in circles around my squad as I zero in on every move, every flip, and every damn high kick. They're phenomal as ever, still I need to make sure we're on point for the next game. Squatting low, I assess how one of my girls back up and shows that flexibility by bending backwards with palms outstretched to the ground. She ends the number with a smooth sensual backflip into the splits, ofcourse poppin each ass cheek individually. I cheer and ofcourse give my girl, along with the crew, a standin ovation.

"Excellent muthafukin job per usual, owwwww!" I mimick my bitch Cardi and I clap for my amazing team.

My cell rings from the bleachers a few feet away. Im tired, plus that might be Mr. Stark and I know better than to ignore; it's definitely time to call it a day.

"Listen up my beautiful people, we done for the day. But, side note, please don't forget to team up with your cheer buddy as many times as needed before the game to make sure each of you got the routine down pact. If you have any questions, hit my line. Aight y'all."

A few hugs goodbye and smacks to my rear, I'm able to grab my phone and check my missed calls. Fuck.. The butterflies in my tummy are instantaneous as I read 'Tony Stark' across my screen. No matter how many times he calls it never fails to make me wanna squeal and do a few back flips of my own.

I hit the send button and redial him as I chew on my bottom lip nervously. It only does half a ring before his sexy voice speaks through the phone.

"Hey, there's my other favorite girl. Where are you? You busy?"

It's just like Tony to be all in my business, even though he was my employer, not father. There wasn't a thing he didn't know about me after being Morgan's babysitter for over 3 years now.

"Why no, Daddy, I'm not busy." I tease him with a giggle. "I'm at uni right now. Just finished practice. Why, wassup?"

The silence lastin just a second too long before he clears his throat and answers.

"You uh.. Just finished cheer practice?" He repeats slowly.

"Yeah, literally just a second ago. Gonna change and head home. Why, you need me?" I ask concerned.

"I do honey, need you to come watch Morgan for the weekend. Peppers outta town for business and I'll be here but not here. You available for me pretty girl?"

The way he speaks to makes my heart wanna dive out my damn chest, especially when his wife's not around. His already pampering nature amplifies he and doesn't seem to able to resist calling me those sweet lil nicknames that make me weak in the knees.

"Yes Mr. Stark. Always, anything for you." I breathe back, thighs clenching at the way the tone of his voice is starting to get me aroused.

"Perfect. And call me Tony, you know better honey." He gently scolds. "Anyway, I'm sending a car to come get you immediately."

I hear him snap his fingers over the phone and assume that's his way of sending me a ride.

"But I'll need to go home and grab a some things to stay for a few days." I remind him.

"No. I want you here as soon as possible. I already have someone on their way to you." His response leaves no room for argument, so I don't even bother.

"Ok then, catch you inna minute. And tell Morgan I can wait to see her."

"You got it babygirl. See you soon."

I hang up, grabbing my Nike backpack and head to the pick up area in front of the school. Fuck, another weekend with Tony Stark. Let's see how long it takes before I drench my panties when I get in his presence this time.

45 mins later

I arrive to Tony's mansion relieved to finally get to see my 2 favorite people in the world. They're waiting for me at the front door with big smiles, Tony holding Morgan on his back. She lightly kicks outwards to get free from her father. He happily sets her down and she runs up to me excitedly wearing the cutest ladybug bathing suit. Wrapping her tiny arms around my waist, she hugs me affectionately. I bend and hug her back just as tight and tell her how happy I am to see her.

"Daddy says your staying all weekend, is that true?" She inquires, nose scrunched making her the spitting image of her father.

"Yes, I am. Us girls are gonna have a blast. I was thinking tomorrow I could paint your nails and then maybe you could paint mine? I'd love your help picking out a cute color, what do ya think?"

"Let's just go get a manicure." She rebuttals smartly, taking my hand and dragging me to the front door. I barely have a second to grab my backpack!

"Or there's that." I laugh and wave goodbye to Tony's driver as Morgan pulls me past her father to the pool.

"Guess Daddy will catch you guys later." Tony chuckles, watching us amused.

"Guess so Daddy." I don't get a chance to catch the way his nostrils flare a bit or how he licks his lips at my statement as he watches his daughter steer me away.

Her and I have a blast in the pool for a couple hours, Morgan even more so as I sit on the edge with just my feet in. She shows me how well she's gotten a swimming since the last time we saw each other. It's beyond obvious her practice is paying off; my best lil buds gonna be ready for competitions in no time.

After, Tony brings us hot cheesy pizza for dinner as she grabs his laptop and shows me how to do the newest tik tok dance challenges that she and her friends like the most. We lay by the pool eat and laugh together as all the goofy and cool new trends come up. It just surprises me that a young girl can navigate the platform so efficiently. The smartie pants even makes me an account so I can keep up with what she's up to.

"Alright, little girl. Its 7:30, time to go to sleep. We'll do a bath in the morning. Go brush your teeth and get into your pjs. Daddy and I'll be by to say goodnight when your done."

The good girl that Morgan is, she kisses my cheek and skips off into the house. I quickly clean up our mess and head off to search for Tony.

When I find him it's 7:45 and he's laid out on the couch in one of his dens, arm thrown tiredly over his face. I think he's asleep from his even breaths, the calm rise and fall of his athletic bare chest. Fuck he makes my mouth water the way he lays with his legs spread wide, wearing only a pair of soft cotton light grey sweats low on his hips. His toned tummy and the thin line of his happy trail entice me to come closer for a better look and I'm right behind him in an instant. Goddam the bulge of his cock looks girthy as fuck.

I reach out and lightly massage at his shoulders, bending for just a moment to whisper at his ear.

"Its time for Daddy to go say goodnight."

Tony removes his arm and gazes up at me tiredly. The short low groan helps activate the already swirling storm in my gut. There's no way my panties aren't wet.

"Ok, honey. Let's go." Sitting up a few inches before pausing as Jarvis begins to speak.

"Actually Mr. Stark, Morgan has been asleep for 3 minutes 26 seconds. I predict she will not be awake for another 10 and a half hours sir."

"Thanks." Daddy relaxes into my touch again before speaking again.

"Hey Jarvis?"

"Yes, Mr. Stark?"

"Take a walk."

"Yes sir."

There's a quiet beep signaling the AI's exit as I continue to massage Tony's strong shoulders.

"Come here, beautiful. Come sit on Daddy's lap, let's talk." He requests gently.

I know we've been crossing some kinda boundary the way we speak to one another, but if I do as he asks this'll be a clear violation in his marriage. I don't wanna cause harm to Tony in any way, in fact I ache to make him happy however I can. That desire in itself is probably what has me toeing of my shoes and plopping my round ass cheeks right on his dick before I have another thought.

He's half hard and I'm baffled how I didn't notice because he's already so thick. The first press of my pussy against it has me biting my lip and pushin again and again to mimic the pressure on my clit. My breath puffs out as I hold back a moan at the feeling. Christ, I'm throbbing in need and I've sittin in his lap for a total of 5 seconds.

"Did my 2 favorite girls have fun?" Tony asks seemingly unaffected..

Except when i squint it seems his breath accelerates just a bit through his slightly open mouth, warm strong chest rising and falling just a fraction faster. His palms slide underneath my skirt to the top of my thighs, tenderly rubbing in a circular motion as I lightly hump at his cock.

"So much fun, Daddy. I'm kinda tired though, long day. Obviously not long as yours. You look exhausted. You ok?"

He only tilts his head and offers a small shrug.

"I kinda feel better now that I get to see my little cheer captain in her sexy uniform." Tony leers up at me with a smirk before winkin, making me bust out in laughter.

"So how's classes sweetheart? You doin okay?"

"I am, first semester was a bit difficult but I got the ropes now. I'm a fuckin superstar." I brag with a smile.

"That's great honey, glad to hear it." He replies warmly, rotating his hips in circles against me.

"Still don't ever forget that I gotta blank check with your name on it. Matter fact, you're not leavin here this weekend without it. Got it?" He asks sternly, lookin directly into my soul.

"Yes Daddy." I answer without a second thought.

"Good girl." He praises, moaning low in his throat at my swift movements.

"Well.." I lean forward till our lips are almost touching and look deep into his pretty eyes. "What can I do to make Daddy feel better?"

Tony breaks first. He roughly presses his lips to mine, sucking and kissing as he holds me in place with one hand on the back of head. The other hand grips my thigh firmly as he dominates our kiss passionately. His fine ass licks into my mouth while groaning, sucking on the tip of my tongue as I moan loud and frantically crush our pelvis' together. He gives me one nip to my lips before speaking against them.

"Make Daddy cum, sweetheart."

"How?" I ask nervously, pulling back to look into his hazy eyes.

"Any way you want gorgeous."

My hips come to a halt as I think for a moment before sliding off his lap to my knees and greedily soakin in the growl he emits when he notices the wet spot I left on his crotch.

Pulling my medium sized perky tits through the designed slit at the bottom of my cheer top, showing him stiff pierced nipples. A small slim chain hangs between my breasts, connecting the 2 piercings. I shake my titties at him, smiling at his hypnotized glazed stare at my supple chest.

"Fuck my tits." I demand, slightly dipping my head forward to let a generous glob of spit splat between them.

There's no need to ask twice as Tony hastily snatches his dick from his sweats and slides it between my round brown orbs. He relaxes back into the deep navy blue sectional while I press my breasts together to surround his thick shaft and begin with slow strokes. Biting those delicious lips, his head dips further into the couch as he watches me through slits. Daddy looks so fucking good as he fights the pleasure enveloping his dick.

"Hoooooh, fu- AH! Jesus y/n, feels so good. Thank you, pretty girl. Ohfuck! Just what I needed. Mmmm.. Yeah, yeah just like thaaat.."

His arms hang limp at his sides as he lets me unravel him. Poor baby, his eyes don't know where to look, darting from my dark nipples to his big fat dick stabbing up through the swell of my breasts. I take a mental picture of the way he loses his mind in my body, hips coming up erratically to meet my downward thrusts.

"You like slipping your fat cock between my titties, Daddy?" I ask innocently, squeezing his dick a bit more firmly.

"Ah, ah, yes babygirl! N-never felt this gooood!" He sputters back to me.

"Glad you're enjoying yourself. Though the other option was to lay on my back, spread open my legs and wet little pussy to you. Let you be the judge of which hole of mine you wanted.. first.."

I speed up my slippery tits, fucking his twitching cock from base to tip at a quick steady pace. The spit turned out to be the perfect lubricate as he easily plunges his dick between my tits.

"Oh fuck little girl, so goddamn perfect for me- haaaashit! Ahhaaaa, fuck! Ohmyfuckinggod y/n want that so bad. N-need to fuck every inch of you honey.."

His hands ball into fists as he widens his stance, giving me ample room to work. Those gorgeous eyes roll back into his head as he gasps at the sensation building in his groin.

"Yes, yes, yes! Please! Letmefuckyouhoney! P-please, need to cum y/n. Aaaaaaahfuuuuuck! Haven't cum in months. Pleasepleaseplease, will do anything sweetheart!"

Now completely understanding Tony's absolute desperation, my cunt flutters as his pleas to feel my pussy double and rise in volume. I slam my tits onto his dick repeatedly, loud wet smacking intermixed with his sobs.

"How long Daddy? Exactly how long since you sprayed your thick milky cream outta this big fat ass cock?" I ask, leaning to give kitten licks to the wide flushed tip.

I moan animatedly at the taste of the salty precum dripping from his leaky dick. It's so fucking addicting that I hungrily slurp on the head of his dick. His abs ripple as his body trembles through the onslaught.

"Almost a-Haaa! FUCK! Almostayeeeear! Ohshitohshit, gonna c-cum babygirl!"

Fuck that's way too damn long, so I resolve to not make him wait a second longer to fill up a wet and willing pussy.

"Yeeees ah, ah, ahhhh- wait! What the fuck?Come back here little girl!"

I giggle as I duck away from his hands swiping to pull my back towards his equally enraged dick. I scoot back on the plush white carpet, pulling off my squort and parting my shapely cocoa thighs. He's so immediately entranced at me spreading my pussy lips with one hand as I crook my finger and invite him over with the other.

"Oh fuck me, thank you sweetheart. Love you so much babygirl, you don't even know. Your my perfect girl, wish you were my wife instead honey."

I don't know if Tony knows he's speaking as he clumsily takes his place between my legs but the admission warms my heart.. And my pussy. I kiss his neck and hold him tight as he thanks me profusely for letting him inside.

He aims his dick at my pulsing little hole, tapping my clit twice before slipping about an inch of his dick inside. I keen at the stretch, whining and pulling at him for more but apparently that's all Daddy needs. Slamming his eyes shut, he hunches over me going completely feral and unloads months and months worth of frustration into me.

"Yea-eeeees, little girl! Lemme breed my favorite girl. Haaaaa fuck! Feels like heaven, cantstophoney! Ah, ah, ah, so gooood y/n. Love you much! So so so much!"

I relish how fucking whiny he becomes as he releases heavy splats of cum against my walls. The pressure of his load makes me moan like a whore underneath him as he holds me to his carpet by my shoulders and gives us both what we need.

"That's it Daddy, fill me up. Make me take your cum. I want all of it, yeeeees! Don't waste a drop, gimme my cream pleeeeease. My wet little kitty wants to drink up a thick dose of your milk Daddy, gimme!"

The force of Tony's nut stuns him but his fluttering lid reopens as he gazes at my face. Even through his flismy focus he stares at the sloppy saliva spattered on my tits and tummy down to where his dick splits me open wide.

It's my turn to become distressed as I hump at the rock hard cock dripping the last few drops of his load into my greedy cunt. Neither of us hear the front door open in our opposite state of minds; or the footsteps clicking towards our location.

"What the fuck?!" Peppers deranged voice echoes throughout the dim den making us jumps, the cock piercin me unintentionally stabbing a few inches deeper.

I wail in fucking pure delight, nails scratching down Tony's back as he immediately seethes at her entrance. It's clear he's not happy she interrupted our private moment. Still, his dick remains stiff as fuck inside me.

Lookin up at his wife with disdain, brows still pinched from the feeling of my pussy clutching at him hungrily, he demands that she leave.

Maybe it's time for Daddy to get a divorce..

[weneeya]

hi weneeya!! I made sure to read ur rules btw :3

and I was wonderingggg... maybe you could write a scenario (highschool setting) with Sugawara with the shy art kid! super fluffy✨

as an art kid myself, I like to draw people who im fond of! and since reader just have this big crush on Suga, she sketches him and presents it to him :))

I'll be waiting for the request! tysmmm✨

a cute gift w/ sugawara m.list | rules

note. hiii thank you sm for your request, the idea is so cute i love it!! always super fluffy, love that <3 feel free to request!

It would have been an euphemism to say that you loved art. It was actually your only way to express yourself. Your emotions were coming out better when it was through art. And as you had some problems yourself, you had some hyperfixations. 

It would be weird to say that you had a hyperfixation on Sugawara, obviously, but you had a huge crush on your senior. The boy was one year older than you, but it was like fate always wanted you to meet him ; or maybe it was your due. 

You were way too shy to even think about talking to him, but the simple sight of his handsome face and adorable smile was enough. He was your muse, you had to admit it. For the past few weeks, at least half of your drawings were him. Only sketches most of the time, things you were a bit ashamed of because it would never be as pretty as he was. 

Your friends were trying to convince you to make a move towards him, but how could you? A boy like him was out of reach for someone like you, and you were well aware of it. But after some fights, they got you to talk to him. 

You spoke a few times, when you were meeting in the hallways or things like this. Just enough for him to know who you were and remember your name. And the more you talked with him, the more you wanted to be with him again and again. 

You couldn’t simply confess to him like this, you weren’t able to do so. You had only one solution to your problem. You had to express your feelings to him by the way you expressed yourself the best : art. 

It took you a few more weeks to achieve your piece. It wasn’t the Joconde, but you were quite proud of what you did. It was one of the prettiest drawings you had ever done, but it wasn’t even half pretty as he was. 

The real problem now was to gather enough strength to give it to Sugawara. The boy was currently talking with his friends from his class when you cleared your throat, quickly asking him if he could somewhere else with you. The more you waited, the worse it would be. 

To your surprise, Suga didn’t hesitate for long before saying yes, following you out of the room without any more questions. This is how both of you ended up on the rooftop, you with your hands hidden behind your back. 

“You needed something from me?” He asked with this usual smile of his, and you were sure you felt your heart skipping a beat. In a second, you were handing your drawing to him, looking away to be sure you would never meet his gaze. 

When his eyes saw what you were offering to him, it was his own heart which stopped when he realized what it was. He stayed silent, his eyes roaming over the drawing, again and again. It was one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen, and it was him. He couldn’t believe it. 

“You… You drew me?” He slowly asked, raising his eyes to you while you were clearly avoiding his eyes. You slowly nodded your head, still looking away. A smile slowly appeared on his lips, and the second after you were between his arms for a hug. He held you tight, thanking you over and over. You were trying to say something, but he didn’t give you the time. 

“Please, don’t ever stop. You’re so talented, and I’d love to be your model but officially next time,” he told you with a wink, and you swore your face never burned so much before. He chuckled slightly when he saw you, leaving a simple kiss against your forehead. “I love art.” 

It was going to be a difficult process for you with a boy as expressive as him, but you were ready to make all the efforts in the world for him, especially if it meant being able to draw him freely and spend more time in his company.

thank you for reading <3

[moonrkgk]

♡moving fundraiser!♡

HI HI it's me, moon!!

I'm moving!! (very far, much travel) and im starting a little fundraiser for it!

I'll be streaming more frequently the coming weeks to prepare, so consider coming and giving moral support! Or maybe picking up a commission. I want to ensure that i can still finish my work while also having ENOUGH work to meet my goals!

Goal A is just having enough to support myself while im there. I plan on renting a room (hey if youre a furry that doesnt mind a super quiet roommate with no pets/kids/spouse let me know! Lol). This loosely translates to i want at least 2 months of the average rent ive found for myself under this condition (since i will still be able to work and i will start looking for a job immediately.)

Goal B is ensuring i have funds for a moving truck or car rental. I don't own much, so i can keep travel light! Unfortunately not light enough to take a flight, but enough that i wont have to rent a box truck which cuts down on costs! Goal C is making sure i can afford at least one overnight stay along the way. Since i will be making the trip alone, i will likely need to stop to sleep at least once. Ive driven quite a ways before, but never a full 20 hours.

My total goal is $2,000. This should cover all my costs and needs as well as a little padding in case of emergency.

If you'd like to send me a tip to help out, you can throw some into my buymeacoffee!

If youd like to commission me instead and get some sweeet art in return, keep an eye on my twitter! (Most of my art is NSFW so thats the only place i can safely and reliably post it! Sorry about that.)

You can message me on discord for any inquiries! @ MOONRKGK

Hopefully everything can fall into place smoothly and there isnt anything im not forseeing. Moving means work, walkability, and general stability that i cant find here. I havent been able to find work in several years, the minimum wage is low, and its a multiple hours walk to the nearest store. ( Brutal when its 110 outside or below freezing like it often is here! ) I have to make change happen in my life if i expect anything to get better, so im putting my all into this one!

Thank you for reading, and thank you for any support tossed my way.

[fandomsnstuff]

Consider: twosun didn't have snow. Anywhere. At all. They didn't even have a concept of it. They don't know what it is. Anyway, it's day 26 of @taznovembercelebration and im a canadian who tried to write people who've never seen snow before

Day 26: wonder

The IPRE crew is very happy that their plan worked and they've successfully hidden from the Hunger. What they didn't plan for, was how cold Faerun could get and the not-rain falling from the sky.

Read it on AO3

After they deploy the relics in what they hope to be the final cycle, the IPRE crew waits with bated breath for the Hunger. But the scouts never come. Days pass, then weeks, then months, and the sky never darkens unnaturally, revealing countless white eyes opening up to find them.

As those months pass, they find that the days shorten and the air cools. As people built for a world with two suns, this poses a bit of a problem. Sure, they spent certain cycles in colder and darker climates, but that doesn't mean they enjoyed it. One year just isn't enough time to adapt to that. So they make do. Sweaters and blankets are plentiful, and when the cold gets bad enough that the ship's heating system can't seem to break through it, they all pile up in the living room. Body heat is crucial for survival. Not to mention that Magnus is simply a furnace of a man.

He's the one who seems to be able to function the best. He has to wear a shirt (or a few), much to his chagrin, but he still gets up every morning and dutifully goes for a run.

One morning, he extracts himself from the pile of bodies on top of him, and everyone shuffles in to fill the space he left. He's barely gone for a few minutes when he comes back and excitedly says, “guys, get up! You gotta see this!”

There are some grumblings about having to leave the nice warm sleep pile to go to the cold outdoors, but they comply. When they get outside, though, the grumblings stop as they all stand in awed silence.

Davenport had landed the cloaked ship in a field just outside a nearby town. That town, the field, and everything else, is now coated in a thick layer of white… stuff. And small bits of it fall from the sky. Magnus runs out onto it, and it crunches under his feet, leaving footprints behind. He turns back to them and holds his arms out, “isn't it great?!”

“It's beautiful,” Lucretia says. The sun peeks through the soft grey clouds and it sparkles. She breathes out, “woah.”

Lup steps out into it and holds out her hand. Some of the little bits land on her hand, and stay there a moment before melting away. She crouches and scoops some up off the ground, crushing it in her hand. Some falls back to the ground and some melts away. She wipes her hand off on her pants. “It's like the cold sand from, what was it? 45?”

“42,” Lucretia says, “but I don't remember it falling from the sky. Or melting.” She holds her hand out too, and watches the bits melt. “It's water.”

“So it's raining ice,” Taako pulls his obscene amount of blankets tighter around himself, “peachy.”

“I don't think it's ice,” Barry says, “this isn't one solid piece.” He examines the bits that have collected on the sleeve of his sweater, “it's like it's crystallised.”

“Maybe I can go into town and talk to someone,” Magnus says, “they'll probably know what's up with this. Maybe we can get some better gear, because I don't know about you guys, but my shoes and socks got wet the moment I stepped out here.”

“I'll go with you,” Lucretia says, “just give me two minutes to put real clothes on.”

Not long after, they're crossing the field together.

“You weren't kidding about the wet shoes,” she says.

“I even changed my socks while you were getting dressed and put on different shoes, and my feet are still wet.”

“Well Taako promised us soup when we got back, so I think that'll keep me–” she cuts herself off with a yelp as her feet hit harder ground and fly out from under her. Magnus catches her before she cracks her head open on the cobblestone. “Now that,” she says, getting back on her feet, “is ice.”

“No kidding,” Magnus links her arm in his and they make their way (carefully) into the streets, “the last thing we want to do is lose you when we've only just begun the rest of our lives.”

She squeezes his arm. “We won't be perpetually in our early 20s anymore.”

“I'll finally be able to fully develop my frontal cortex.”

All through town, there are children playing in the cold snow, and people walking briskly down the street. Lucretia and Magnus are wearing the most layers out of anyone. Lucretia spots a café on the opposite side of the street. “Let's go in there,” she says, nodding in its direction, “the air out here is making my face hurt.”

They cross the street as quickly as they dare, and sigh with relief as the warmth of the indoors and the smell of fresh baked goods hits them. They walk up to the counter, where a young woman is placing a tray of croissants into the display.

“Awfully cold out there,” Magnus says, turning on his rustic charm.

The woman looks up at them, amused. “Newcomers?”

“You could say that.”

She laughs and shakes her head. “Trust me, if you think this is cold, you haven't seen anything yet.”

Both of their faces drop. “It gets worse?” Lucretia asks.

“Oh, yeah.” She gestures to the window, “you actually can't get snow if it's too cold. That's when you get freezing rain and everything's covered in a layer of ice.”

They both just stare at her, dumbfounded. Their home plane had nothing like this. It didn't get this cold, and it certainly didn't have “snow” and rain that covered everything in ice. The young woman smiles pleasantly, “so what can I get you?”

They glance at each other. Magnus says, “directions to somewhere warmer, maybe?”

[ragzonacamrencruise]

hiii ex-camren shipper, but i still believe tbh. i listened to a couple songs off mila's new album (B.O.A.T and june gloom) both are kinda obvious camren songs to me. a decade long situationship is insane honestly, but they are both lover girls so i see them doing this. i think they've outgrown each other, but what they had was very formative and impactful so they aren't entirely sure how to let go. this is atleast my take on what camila wrote in these songs, being the most lyrically interesting ones off the album.

hello anon!

tbh, those two songs are the ones which DO have meaningful lyrics. at least that's what i think. idk abt others.

after listening to her first 3 albums (4, if you consider the cinderella one an album), this one's all over the place. i get that she's experimenting with new things and that's great. production wise, i'd say there're a lotta sounds that could've been included and a lotta sounds that coulda been eliminated.

coming to the lyrical part, we all know mila's a lyrical genius. she's literally the one who wrote, "see me like breath in the cold" and "i wanna dive in, what a divine moment". but this is not the same person, cuz, "im a dog, woof woof" ain't doing it for me.

"you'd never give me peace of mind, so i had to give it to myself" is not the same as "loving you was sunshine, safe and sound, a steady place to let down my defenses. but loving you had consequences"

i feel like mila's still in the denial stage, cuz denial makes u do crazy stuff. a friend of mine was in denial of her father's death due to alcoholism and she was straight up blaming witchcraft.

deep down i know that they're not together anymore. but that doesn't mean that i can't hope anymore. they're the one thing that made me anchor myself during my darkest days and i'll never let them go. mila can experiment all she wants but i know there's still the lyrical genius, emotionally fuked up mila hiding somewhere deep down.

i can only hope she'll be able to bring that side out of her. and yes anon, their relationship was very impactful. i mean, mila couldn't help but write 2 full albums and dedicate it to L. it's uncanny how much she couldn't get L out of her system. it's exactly how our mother taylor swift says, sometimes you can't help but write 2 whole albums about one person and sometimes, even if you've spent years with them, you won't even write a sentence about another.

it's just how creativity works.

but who knows?? maybe we're all wrong and maybe they both are well and truly over each other. i mean, we're talking abt stuff that happened when they were 16yrs old to 20yrs old. i'm not even the same person i was an year ago.

change is to be expected. i, specifically, am unable to digest this drastic change in mila cuz, well, i simply cannot bear to watch my baby mila grow up. i mean . . . she's cursing in songs more often now? my baby mila would never do that. but she's not a baby anymore and that's what angers (read as: saddens) me the most.

i'm just hoping for something just a little bit better, at this point, so that my heart gets consolation with a glimpse of that little part of mila who wrote 2 full masterpieces.

[gege-wondering-around]

I hope your world is a happy one at the moment! 🩵I was wondering: what are some of the things that never fail to make you smile?

Hi darling, so sorry it took me so long to answer you! hope you are having an amazing day!💗

I've been thinking about your question since it first caught my eyes a few days ago and between thinking about the answe and dancing between drivers ed and working on my WIP i got lost in time!

Anyway!

my WIPs:

Something that never fails to make me smile are surely my WIPs! Ant time i work on them (rn only on one of'em) i get so happy with myself!

I have a very horrible memory so whenever i re-read something i wrote even a week ago, i don't remeber much of it and i get always surprised by what i wrote and by how much i like it (it's also the reason why sometimes i read the same fics without even noticing it till the end!)

I was always the kinda person who preferred to write than to speak, so I've been writing (poetry, little scenes without any connections, little works maybe never finished from when i was in middle school, and my WIPs now) for basically all my life! the major reason of why i started writing a while back was to express myself, my pain and my thoughts while i was going through a hard time in my life, but now I got to enjoy this as a way of being alive and it brightens my day to be able to write such wonderful things (I'll post a fic soon, so i promise there'll be some ground for this info in a little while).

here's a little thing i wrote in my latest fic (coming soon probably)

So, I basically love writing! I also learned english because i like writing and i never like writing in my native language...

my cat:

big old boy here is my good old pal Bounty! (nobody calls him that, but whatever ahah)

He is clumsy, fat, friendly, a ball of fur and a basic dork! He loves nothing more than to give and recieve love and he has an obsession with his food (he meows as loudly as possible when he wanna eat) and he has been by my side for 8 years now, from when i first got down a bad road to now (where i'm all better) and he has never left me!

Kindness:

It's not very tangible but it just makes me glad to have fought so i'm able to witness how kind people can be! It reminds me the world isn't just cruel and unfair, but it can be kind and caring especially when we are towards each other!

and to give you an example of kindness, i'll bring out a passion of mine i dont really talk about here...

big old pal here comes from an anime called Trigun, his name is Vash.

buddy had no other goal than to be kind to everyone in every way possible despite everyone was against him cause they thought he was the bad guy cause he was different than them (let's say, he is the personification of what keeps humanity going in the show) and buddy here wanted nothing more than to help and despite carrrying this huge big boy here

he didn't use to shot to anyone, his aim was always towards the bad guys' weapons to make them drop 'em and his air the excellent!

to me, old pal above is one of the many examples of kindness i can think about but i think i can give you another we are both familiar with...

(from pinterest)

i mean, if he isn't a symbol of kindness without pulling in any "big ones" of kindness (and by this i mean a more popular person), i don't know what else to say...

my spotify playlist of the moment:

just love these songs and i just sing them all day

and here they are!

those never fails to make me smile!

hope you're having an amazing day and im about to run to your ask box to ask the same cause im too curious now to know your answer to this🫂✨

forgive any typos <3

[choccy-milky]

Hi! I started reading your story sometime in the last week and I’m OBSESSED! I normally don’t have much patience and can’t get myself to read anything past like 15k or anything that’s still being worked on, but your story hooked me almost instantly! I really liked the description and decided to give it a try and I’m so glad I did. The detailed descriptions you give pull me into the story and the way you seamlessly switch points of view feels so natural. I just wanted to let you know how much I’m enjoying reading so far and I’m excited for more! ❤️

AW TYSM😭😭 this means a lot, esp since ive been kinda self conscious about the length of my fic lately (and also how long its gonna end up being once im actually done LMFAO) and ik my chapters have gotten ginormous BAHAHA so im glad that even if you don't usually read long stuff you still gave my fic a try and enjoyed it so much + are looking forward to more!!💖💖so ty again😭🙏 AND as usual i'll be using this to answer other asks:

thank you and AA im glad to hear it!! a lot of people have been telling me ive been inspiring them to draw lately and i love it (im just sorry i dont have any concrete tips to give people other than keep practicing LOL) but good luck and i hope you keep at it!!🥰🥰

GIRL IDK, IDEK HOW LONG THE STORY IS GONNA BE, but assuming im still brainrotted even when its done then YEAH u wouldnt be able to stop me if you tried😊 (im glad you like them so much as well, ty!!😭)

thank you!! and yes i usually have at least a vague idea of what i want in the story before i start, though a lot of it didn't become concrete until i started writing/things evolving from there. i made a big (slightly) vague timeline of the entire fic from beginning to (almost) end, and then i keep fleshing it out from there as the ideas keep coming to me/evolving, and for each chapter i make an even more detailed outline, and THEN i get started on the final chapter. so its a bit of a process bahaha, but the brainstorming is really fun!! as for any advice, im not sure. maybe just brainstorm/write down scenes and ideas that you know for a fact that you want to put in your fic, and then try to find a way to connect them to other scenes from there and work backwards. basically WRITE WHAT YOU WANT TO READ, cuz like im my own biggest fan fr, thats the most important part LMAO

LMFAO speaking of outlining future events.....this may or may not happen in the future/in an epilogue when clora is pregnant and she got those pregnant woman hormones that seb is fighting for his LIFE to keep up with HAHAHA

ive been drawing since i was 4 years old so...a while. LOL. and if you even look back to the beginning of my blog, my first drawings of seb were SO UGLY💀💀 so if you just keep drawing you constantly get better naturally (also in response to the other ask you sent as well, i use clip studio paint to draw!)

AW TYYY. AND YES CLORA WILL HAVE ANOTHER MC MOMENT, the ranrok confrontation is still coming, after all...👀👀 and true, idek who would win if clora and seb duelled again with neither of them holding back, but u are so right. even if clora DID win that would do nothing to change sebs mind about how protective he is LMFAO. THANK YOU AGAIN im glad you like my fic + drawings so much!!💖💖

BAHAHAH in my fic (for smut reasons and so that they could be 17 when they did the nasty) i made clora's bday april 3rd and sebs february 12, so clora is an aries and seb is an aquarius (and yes i just checked and apparently they ARE compatible, so seb can rest. also i just read up on aquarius and damn it unintentionally suits seb so well?? LOL "Aquarius is undoubtedly the most innovative, progressive, rebellious, and humanitarian. " and "They have incredible energy, though they may not always use it wisely. They find it easy to get through life on charm and good looks." LMFAO. ok king we love that

[cloudcountry]

fuck i literally realized a lot of this is due to how much I relate to him IM SORRRYRYRYRYRY but i just wanna talk about him today (i have no fun insights this is just yapping... URGGBSHGRFYGH I RELATE TO AND LOVE HIM SO MUCH SOBS ON UR DOOR STEP)

im sorry, i believe a little warning for the first paragraph i bring up my own dead sibling cause I wanted to get that out of the way

This is decently specific to me: I have a younger dead sibling and idia is just i can relate just so hard to bc of that one fact, (gets out the idia journal) we were around the same age when our siblings died we think we both got them killed through harmless fun comments and just having someone so close to you as your younger sibling die at a young age kinda fucks with you and stuff idrk whats going on but something is

we both have social anxiety i don't think mine is as bad but if i had the option to just talk through a tablet i would, especially in certain situations where i'll freeze up (aka talking to any waiter ever) I genuinely a lot better when im there for someone else that has so we could have a symbiotic relationship for social situations

+ I NEED TO REASSURE HIM HIS DAMN IMAGINARY AUDIENCE ISN'T ACTUALLY REAL NOT EVERYONE HATES YOU YOU DON'T HAVE TO ACT LIKE IT IM RIGHT HERE I LOVE YOU SM :((

Okay funny silly time: love of cats omg cats i love cats he loves cat give him cat he would be unsure how to treat it exactly bc he never had a childhood cat but he has done so much research on cats that he probably could info dump on the cat on why it so cool and the best thing ever "Awww did you know you get a lot of your water from your food bcuz you're a dessert animal and you avoid still standing water due to your prey possibly contaminating the water" please let him see those stray cat cams in china he would love donating food to them,, he would be spear heading naming everyone and making sure they all get a wiki page

OKAY ENOUGH ABOUT IDIA AND CATS BUT HE WOULD SEE IF HE COULD GET THE FUNDS TO OPEN A CAT SHELTER AND FEED SO MANY STRAY KITTIES MOVING ON

baby noooooo,,,, :(( yes im looking back on his after overblot dialogue as a reference even though i just read it anyways,,, Idia will never be able to have his own life separate from his family, since yk cursed and shroud, it's basically a path that was bricked in for him. its like his life path is a long corridor that leads to the same road no matter what he picks. Especially since his unique magic locks him into working for STYX since he can just open a very vital thing and idk almost take over the world. if the shrouds acc got unique magic i think idia could have actually went on to lead a decently good life whether he was STYX head by choice or something else (game dev)

hes so passionate about the things he enjoys, there is so many examples of this, he's into so many things and loves them all with his whole heart it's so endearing (also uhsn dfbghrg bonding over media is the best, hes probably so fun to talk to about media... but he might lord knowing so much over you >:p ily just let me put my two cents in you can keep info dumping idia) OUGH (ignore me doing the hand thing PLEASE I LOVE IDIA I LOVE ORTHO IM ENJOYING WRITING THIS SM) OKAY ANYWAYS aww okay reading over idia's dialogue like im writing you an argumentative essay or something,, STAR ROGUE! the idia of idia (wtf r u writing edie) HIS SILLY ASS SLANG HRGBHRBGVLRHG "OUR LEGEND, POP OOOFF!" Anyways idia just recounting everything about star rogue without second thought he loves it sm he probably played it sm he knows the opening by heart (IDIA AND ORTHO SAYING THE TAG LINE TOGETHER THIS IS KILLING ME AUBURN)

hes heard so often that he was genius when he was really young it was just hardwired for him to think he was the best in the room especially with the advancements he has made from the ages of 10-12. like building ortho is genuinely a feat and he did it and two years definitely he's going to let that go to his head. ngl i feel that his parents were not too great probably absent most of the time since he can just lock himself in his room and work on something that no one knows about for two years. probably fucked him up developmentally too, he was NOT properly socialized the internet was his parents for the entire time probably

he wants to be FUCK THIS SHIT ACC OMG CRIES IN A CORNER SADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD HE JUST WANTED TO BE A COOL ADVENTURER HERO GUY HE DIDN'T KNOW THAT WOULD HAPPEN!!!!! WHAT WENT WRONG IS NOTHING YOU WERE JUST A TOO SMART KID,,, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT AND NEVER WILL BE YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT WOULD HAPPEN OMG. DFGVJKDHJHBCBSHFBSFBSFR

it's like 12:30 right now my mental state is deteriorating this is stupid opinions for the most part i tried my best im sorry if this is bad but YOU SAID GUSH IN YOUR INBOX SO I MADE THAT HAPPEN???

-- with lots of love Edie

EDIEEE MY FAVORITE IDIA KISSER‼ THANK U FOR SHARING YOUR THOUGHTS READING THEM WAS SO INTERESTING!!

first of all holy shit im so sorry about what happened to your sibling. i totally get why you'd find him comforting because of that but Oh my gosh. im so sorry.

i think having social anxiety is something a lot of people can relate to with him, even myself. identity actually brought this up but seeing him being pushed into situations where he is ABSOLUTELY not comfortable makes me want to run in there and help him GET OUT. like i may not like this man that much but nobody should feel pressured or panic over entering a social situation they dont want to be a part of.

AH YES THE CAT CARD

RIGHT YEAH its so SAD how he will never get to live his own life and THATS one of the things that ive thought about a lot concerning him. like it would suck to actually have your fate predetermined no matter what. like he's just going to be stuck there with nobody else except for like ortho and his employees(?) but actually. yk what thats how he spent his school days which is even sadder hello

"the idia of idia" HELLO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN

actually! you bring up a good point about idia always being considered a genius since he was young and how that affects his self esteem and how he interacts with people now. i have literally never thought of it that way but it makes a lot of sense.

THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR THOUGHTS EDIE <3 I LOVED HEARING THEM!!

[mlkbwunnies]

hello, cutie ying!!!

it's my turn to drop by in your inbox, especially since you sent me such a sweet and darling letter.

i know you've been super busy irl, and i want to let you know that it's so admirable how you're able to bring so much positivity and light onto this platform, despite how exhausted you probably are. i love all of the self-ship content you put out, and how you encourage others to be confident and proud in their self-ships as well. you also have the most delicate writing style ever – it's so gentle and soothing, yet very fragile and sensitive. i hope you know that, just by your actions, you're undoubtedly a very lovely person.

i also hope that 19 is treating you well!!! i know growing up can be daunting, but as something who is almost 21, i can tell you that nothing really changed when i turned 20, for better or for worse lol if i had to give one piece of advice, tho, it'd be to figure out what kind of person you want to be and realllllyyyy stick to it. like determine your non-negotiables, discover things that you truly care about, etc. don't let others who put you and the people/things you love about down into your life - let them and their words go as soon as possible. i think it's a wonderful thing to have as much love for others as you do, so make sure you're investing that love into individuals who want and appreciate it!

def did not mean for this to turn into a big sister-esque rant. point is, if you ever need a listening ear, always know that i'm just a discord message away <3 you've got this, so keep your chin up, love yourself hard even when others won't or can't, and i hope you have a wonderful new year!!!! may 2025 treat you with never-ending gentleness and kindness, and take care of yourself!

- carrot 🥕

my sweet carrot . . when i tell you i teared up when i started reading this message !!!! :( thank you thank you thank you so much for all your kind words . . you said that may 2025 treat me with neverending gentleness and kindness– i think it is you that's treating me with all that !!! and i can only hope to return the same amount of love (if not tenfold!!) to you !!! ♡ the advice u gave is so good what T_T i'll remember this as i step into my twenties ahhh . . identity has been a big thing to ponder about and it makes so much sense :') thank u so much carrot :""-) you are so endlessly patient and kind – there is so much love in you and it is so so so evident in all your interactions with everyone eeeee . . i appreciate this big sister message with all the love within me and i hope u kno that im here for you too hehehe c: thank you thank u thank you . . i hope that 2025 is just as lovely and kind to you as you have been with all of us eeee !!! ♡

[navigating--thru--life]

NAVIGATING THRU LIFE

Hi,

I am Ann

and I am 18

and basically I am depressed.

With a lots of thinking I feel there is a lot more to come in life and I wanna see how it works and I'm so sick of just not having a purpose in life or maybe I just have nothing to do with life. I hate the fact that I am so stuck on a loop. So I'm giving myself an year and I'm seeing how things are gonna work out. Hence for the next 365 days this is my purpose. To Blog about the things that happen in my life. I just wanna see my progress if at all I make any. I don't even know if this is the right place for it. I mean I'm sure of nthg in life so... to sum it all up I'm keeping this as my personal journal? and just writing things as I navigate? thru life!.

Before everything I shud tell you its probably gonna be very boring with lots of errors. I'm definitely not a writer. IDK what makes me think people will read this!! Ah well I think I shud just assume that someone will? yeahhh so if u can tolerate my mistakes please I would love to have you here (its okay even if u can't)So I'm staring this on 16/10/2024 hopefully this will be there till 16/10/2025.

So.. I'm gonna start building my better version. yes I will do it! (well idk tbh). So here's my plan. Imma take mini steps that would help me to uk sort of get out of this current attitude day by day. Some thing convinced me that I could do it if I'm doing it as in a blog. So, here we begin. I rly don't know if I will be able to do it. SO.. ANYWAY….

Also guys the order, the way I type is all pretty stupid. IK! I'll get better with days hopefully. I will update you guys with my progress. Idk I feel like, More than anything I wanna get out of this slum.

IM SOO SICK OF BEING IN TRASH SO!! LET'S JUST BE BETTER.

-Ann

[cpunkwitch]

answering my own questions

[pt: answering my own questions]

dont really get sent anything and not many people sent in the questions when the games were posted and reblogged, and i wanted to talk about stuff, so here we are.

this might end up being a multiple part post series?

ask game one (link)

(if comfortable) tell us about your condition? as much info as youre comfy with sharing.

i have a defect in the base of my spine, since i was born its caused me chronic pain all throughout my development and in recent years its only gotten worse, twisting my spine, headaches, jaw issues etc. i've also got highly suspected rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia and ive been diagnosed with a pretty bad case of anemia so bad that everytime a doctor looks at my results after bloodwork they give me a pained look and say "heyy...did you know your iron is low? like...really really low?". that and a hand full of other things, vitamin deficiencies, etc. i dont mind talking more about this

2. do you know about the spoon theory? if yes, what do you think of it?

i'll be honest, the majority of my knowledge of spoon theory off the top of my head is that "drawer with limited supply of spoons" is the disabled way of saying i only have so much motivation and energy (phys, as "battery" usually refers to social and emotional) in me. i've read up on it ages ago but would not be able to put into better words what i still remember about spoon theory (esp since we had a different host back then), i like that its just so much quicker and easier to convey my amount of ability to do things for the day by saying whether or not i have the spoons for it.

i do like to joke that my drawer is always stocked with knives and forks for the ablests, but sometimes that requires spoons to handle too. /silly

3. do you have mobility aids? if yes, which ones? if no, do you want any in the future?

i've mention how i really wish i could have a wheelchair if i were in a different situation, i dont know if i'll ever get one and i almost cried when my brother responded to my joke of "would you make on for me?" with an "i would if i could", i really would like a wheelchair of some kind in the future if the world were more accessible and i were in a safer place. right now though, i've just got my cane that still needs repainting. i guess my moms back brace counts too, i take it with me to work sometimes.

4. how did you find out about cripplepunk? what drew you to the community and movement?

i dont exactly remember but i've known about it for years. i (prev host) might have come across it looking up different punk aesthetics, though im not completely sure why it showed up in a punk aesthetic list, possibly because its punk and people misinterpreted it? my first glimpse was seeing patches on jackets, spiked customized aids, cripples/phys disabled people in your classic punk attire (piercings, dyed spiked mohawks, ripped jeans and fingerless gloves) and i loved it. im a sucker for self expression through appearance and customizing things and then when i found out it was a whole community for support and centered around being physically disabled in general and slowly came to terms with my own disabled body and started accepting myself, i kinda fell in love with cripplepunk in the "this feels like home" sense.

i could probably ramble way more but i'll stop there.

5. if you deal with any kind of pain, what's your method of pain management?

i use hot packs, ice packs, voltaren cream, sometimes i take a cbd gummy, i do little stretches when i remember them, i take walks and hot baths/showers, im trying to go back to the chiropractor and my favourite instructors in rehab (theyre trans friendly and complimented my cane when i first came in with it i love them so much), and i take whatever meds i can, normally anti-inflammatory like ibuprofen but because i cant swallow pills i either take liquid (yeah, childs liquid meds works, the couple hours of mild relief is still worth it) or powdered tylenol or something. the hot/cold stuff depends on the pain and where on my body the pain is.

6. do you stand or sit in the shower or do you prefer baths/find bathing easier rather than showers?

i take baths for my muscles and during the damn monthly ouch in order to relax my body. i take showers just for my shoulders and when im feeling icky and wanna rinse off or something, i take showers on a "regular" basis and i normally stand because the only way i sit is if im crouched in the tub and if i do that i get extra dizzy standing up to get out when i turn the water off. thankfully im no longer near passing out when i take a shower but i still have to sit on the floor matt after because my legs demand rest. i gotta be careful with hot water cuz not only will it make me overheat quickly (i will not realize if in standing in blood-boiling hot water and turning myself into a cooked lobster until after im out) but it can also cause me to literally fall asleep in the bath which can go wrong.

7. do you have a sort of comfort item or safety blanket that helps you feel better, especially on the worst days?

a couple things. a few of them are stuffies/plushies, or music, games or books to help me keep my mind off it i suppose.

8. name 3 things you hate about hospitals/doctors/nurses/the medical system

a) a lot of them refuse to take people seriously or actually listen. sure maybe theyre tired or heard the same shtick before and wanna make sure this person isnt just a drug user trying to pity their way into getting more, but even then all matters a patient presents them with should still be taken seriously and never brushed off or mocked.

b) the fact that the er, the place you take a ticket and wait, is called the Emergency Room, when its normally scheduled appointments and people taken in by the ambulance that are top priority. sure its called the er because most visits through the er are rushed "emergency" last minute visits, people going there because they couldnt schedule an appointment and needed to see someone on that day, but still it feels wrong to call it the emergency room when its really just a waiting room and regardless of the visit they arent actually treated as emergencies. the whole system of just going to see a doctor feels messed up and most of the time you end up just going to see a nurse, get a check up and leave when they tell you what they got after a talk and examination or they schedule to see you again when a doctor is available. because of this i tend to prefer walk in clinics.

c) the fact that they charge to damn much, no matter if youre insured, it still charges so much. no matter what they do. and yeah, healthcare in canada is free to an extent if youre insured but a lot of times they charge more than your insurance can cover and not everyone can get/has insurance. not to mention the medical debt so many people have in america. i get that staff and hospitals need pay and funding but the government should have that covered and not have the patients charged so much for getting help. i almost got charged over 3k just for my short visit to the ward because there was an issue with my insurance and thats a whole angry story for another time.

9. whats an accessibility tool you wish was more accessible/that you had access to?

one of them is aac, the one i have on my phone i have to disconnect my phone to and has a limited amount of phrases i can pick from. id like it better if the app or just aac programs in general when directly to your device speaker by default, had more options for more ease conversing and none of them were behind a damn pay wall, in-app purchase or otherwise. i rarely use it for several reasons but i'd love if i could use it more with less limitations.

also wheelchair ramps. i dont have a wheelchair ramp but i wish people stopped walking on them when theyre clearly able-bodied, i wished my parents taught me and my siblings what the ramps were for and not to run up and down them as well as other parents to their kids because those things are supposed to be clear for a wheelchair user. i also think the corners should be rounded for ease of turning and that wheelchair accessible paths in general should be firm to the ground (not a wimpy matt on the sand that flips over and gets buried on the beach unmaintained), maintained and cleaned regularly, not have any gaps (ive seen so many of the small ones installed in doorways that have a height gap above the ground which causes trouble getting the wheelchair on the ramp let alone through the damn door) and not have railings made of metal if theyre outside (they can often reflect light into peoples eyes and get too hot to touch in the sun both of which are not good issues to have no matter how small they seem.)

those are at least the first to come to mind.

10. whats the worst accessability cockblock you've seen ableds do/make?

theres quite a few i've seen but atm nothing significant comes to mind other than overpricing mobility aids or placing paywalls in front of aids in general.

however there was the few times in more than one school i went to you had to go to the office, provide a 'valid' reason and ask them for a key to the elevator, otherwise they make you take the stairs. i know they do it because they dont want able-bodied kids messing with it n shit but its stupid, it should be accessible to everyone regardless. thank fuck both collages ive been to so far give free elevator use to any staff or student but in the schools i went to i was only allowed have the access key because i couldnt walk up the steps on my sprained/twisted ankle and i had to give it back at the end of every day. the last school even limited my use to just the morning or 1-2 periods that i had on the second floor. nevermind if my locker was up there.

11. whats an accessibility tool youre very thankful for?

screen readers. my little brother uses/used em more than me and i dont use them too often but im glad they exist in general i used them when i was younger and my english teachers gave us work on the computer, i used it like an audiobook and it helped me majorly. i hate that people dont always provide translations to things and make things harder on screen readers by using coloured, tiny, non-serif font-ed or 'quirked' text but ever since i was a kid i was just as happy they existed as i was about braille.

12. name 3 things you like about hospitals/docs/nurses/the medical system

a) that there are some people there who are actually hoping, willing and ready to listen and help others.

b) that they provide things for kids like toys in the waiting room, people who specialize in caring for kids in the hospital, some doctors even have their office decorated. one doctor i went to had her entire office winnie the pooh themed and it helped me out a lot when i got blood work done n stuff, it was really comforting to stare at pooh bear instead of the sharp pokey in my arm.

c) that things are usually kept quiet with low voices, as it reduces risk of overstimulation as well as avoids hurting anyones head and protects privacy of those talking about whats going on. voices are usually only raised to a normal talking level when in the privacy of a nurse or doctor office and its something i dont see really acknowledged anywhere.

13. do you have any favourite disability rep? (media or character)

not picking from my own sources, when it comes to physical disability rep, its hard for me to pick something that involves a realistic character because most of them arent very well portrayed or i cant personally relate to. i can list Freddy freeman as one, hes a crutch user and how the shazam movie portrayed him does well in expressing what ableism can be like for some visibly disabled kids in school. i could probably list some shows that handle disability well through other means if i thought of them, i know theres a few that handle it through super heros being disabled (the one spider-person who's got both a wheelchair and a cane from the recent spiderverse movie for example) or non-human characters having differences that are implied to be disabilities, and i adore that creativity, especially with showing disabled super heros as it tells disabled kids theyre still strong, not broken, they can still be cool and do great things just like able-bodied people. hard for me to name specific things off the top of my head though, guess i like specific tropes around disability rep more than anything. it helps normalize disability and thats what really makes me happy with it. (thats a big reason why i made @/your-fave-is-crippled)

14. least favourite/worst disability rep?

not phys disabled but sia's fucked up movie right off the bat still angers me. i cant name any specifics once again, normally if theres some rep that i dont like i purposely forget they exist to begin with, they arent worth remembering if they arent gonna do it right, y'know? id rather forget and move on than linger and rage about it if i can help it.

15. list some creators (youtubers/bloggers etc) that are disabled and/or cater to a disabled audience that you enjoy? (if any)

@crippled-pvp, @cripple-culture-is are a couple blogs i follow that i enjoy seeing on my dash (sorry if you dont want to be tagged!)

there was a deaf/hoh girl i used to frequent the content of as she talks a lot about signing and i really enjoyed her videos, shes such a sweet person but i never remembered her name nor any of the other creators i watched/followed. no one else comes to mind atm

16. favourite aspect about the general disabled community?

i like that there are people with advice at the ready, whatever question you have or info you need etc, theres always going to be someone with the words you need. i just like how helpful people can be in general in this community and how easily support is accessed through the community.

17. least favourite aspect about the general disabled community?

the fact that theres in-fighting, fake claiming, judgment, quick assumptions, and general internalized ableism still going on when we're supposed to be a community helping each other out not tearing each other down. im not just talking about the fight over "inclusion vs exclusion" on cripplepunk and other sub/separate communities in the disability community.

18. favourite aspect about cripplepunk?

i think my answer to "what drew you to cripplepunk" also answers this.

19. least favourite aspect about cripplepunk?

honestly? none. i hate the people forcing themselves into a space not meant to include them nor benefits them in the first place. i cant actually think of an issue i have with the cpunk community, only issues with people outside being upset over how "exclusive" it is because they want in.

20. free space:

feel free to ask me about any of my answers! i'll make a second post for the second ask game some other time. its currently 11pm and i have to get up early for morning classes yuck

[ID: banner reading "dni if... proship, transx/id, syscourse/discourse blog, anti-mspec lesbians/gays, anti-lesboy/turigirl more in pinned rentry. this blog is protected by the addams family, the de rolo family and co." in all black lowercase text. It has a grey cloud background. On the left is the De Rolo coat of arms with a cobweb in the top corner and symmetrically flipped on the right is the symbol of Vox Machina with the same cobweb in the bottom corner :End ID]

[kamidukki]

uGHHHH tumblr is quite glitchy today and i'll resend this ask

anyWAY i remember i saw aknk official posted something a few days ago(?) and announced that episode 3 is almost completed JAJZJANS i'm so ready for the upcoming angst + drama and possible butler being demonized again but ofc i'll be hurt again AAAAAA i remember the pain and worry when haures got captured then it WAS A CLIFFHANGER leaving me quite emotional for a few days waiting for the last update for episode 2 🤣 also im really curious amd want to know more about the butlers' past especially berrien and fennesz 💖

to be honest, berrien is so mysterious and kind of suspicious you dont even know if his actions are really genuine or... not hMMMMMMM 👁👁

OH AND- i saw a jp theory a long time ago, it was a comparison between haures holding his hand out to master and berrien holding out his left hand and aND apparently, it has a meaning!

when someone is holding out their right hand to you, it means the person liked you or comfortable with you

however if someone is holding out their left hand to you..... it means they dislike you or distaste.

guess who's holding out their left hand? BERRRIIEIEIEIEENNNNNAJJSWJAJJA the way my heart broke when i saw that theory lol 🤣

i know its just a coincidence i know BUT imagine the gut wrenching angst if berrien dislikes his master all this time JAJZJAJAJAJA i'll cry for real if it becomes true 🤣 berrien is one of my fave 🥺

-zella

Hi, zella!

There's a whole lot to unpack in this ask, so I'm putting the 'aknk' and 'akuneko' tag in this in case someone else also want to give their two cents.

❗⚠ [Spoiler alert, read with caution] ⚠❗

Putting aside Berrien, it'll be such a plot twist if Fennesz get demonized next because everyone (mostly) is predicting butler from either the 3rd floor or the basement to be the center in the next episode's stage 👀 If I remember correctly, Fennesz is currently the one who notices Berrien's different 'aura' when he asked about Haures' demonisation at the end of episode 2...? It would be great if he could play an important role in the future, episode 3 or not, because of that 🤔

I take it this is the announcement you mentioned, right?

I'm so excited about the next episode too. It's going to be distributed throughout the entirety of the year 2023, it seems? I certainly can't wait to be emotionally devastated once again. Episode 2 was really, really great, wasn't it? 😊

Since we're still in the topic of official announcement... I'd like to go off tangent a bit and talk about the third bullet point. It said, if my understanding is correct, the implementation of full voice acting in episode 2 and and episode 2.5 will be the last ones that come free. From there onwards, they will come into two parts, free and paid ones. Seems like we'll need to pay an additional fee if we want to unlock the voice...? I'm not entirely sure about this one actually. Anyone with a better grasp of Japanese feel free to correct.

I mean, I'm happy if Akuneko's doing well financially and the people who contribute to it, illustrators and voice actors alike, are getting paid well. On the other hand, as a money-wise poor af person, I'm anxious I won't be able to buy it... 😭 I doubt it will come cheaply after all

Moving on to Berrien, this is the tweet that speculated the right/left hand gesture, isn't it? I'm putting a link a there just in case someone either hasn't seen it/wants some context.

I think we all will cry if Berrien hates us 😂 but it's such a delicious theory, an unprecedented move from a joseimuke game should it ever come true. I mean, the most loving, kind-looking male cast that genuinely hates and/or betrays the players at a certain point??? If Akuneko does that, hats off for the bravery. I don't know if they will be able to pull such move though, given the risk of losing players is too big.

And, oh, I'll cry with you too, that's for sure 😭 I also love Berrien too muchー if anything , he is the reason I play Akuneko. But then again I live off the angst and the drama... Well, don't we all, though 😂

[devitalise]

IMO im sending this so early NOT because I'm trying to beat you (though it does feel nice 🤭) but I'll be offline during our usual end-of-month wrap-up + i SHANT make you wait long!!! HOW DID AUGUST GO! I read ur goodreads review on The Picture of Dorian Gray but I'm dying to hear more 👁️ + do u think you're gonna try and shift into ~fall vibes~ for reading now (whatever that means to you) or continue to go with the flow?

hi cas this was such a jumpscare getting this over a week ago but i'm glad you were able to beat me! of course there's a new autumnal vibe in the books i'll be reading i've even updated my discord profile (goodbye summer kendall you were great)

but i can go into more detail in the

august book wrap up

(2 days early but i'm not finishing a book in 2 days)

The Picture of Dorian Gray (The Original 1980 Uncensored Edition) by Oscar Wilde

well i read a book. there were some really interesting threads in this, i thought Dorian being a narcissistic weirdo was cool to read about, but other than the end of the book taking a much darker turn, i did't find much about this impressive. i don't like reading books expecting them to work harder for me to enjoy them, but i struggled to want to read this.

Must I Go by Yiyun Li

wasn't what i expected it to be, not really a fan of what it was. you give me an 88 year old woman who's survived her eldest daughter's suicide and raised her granddaughter and is looking after her greatgrandaughter and what do we do? we spend almost 200 pages of her dissecting the journal of some random man who ended up marrying his cousin and lived his whole life not knowing he had said daughter? why. i don't care! i don't care!!!!!!! and then when Lila (the character in question) did talk about herself, her mother having her dreams crushed in her marriage, her three marriages and further 4 children, it's just brushed over and kind of shrugged at. none of the "important" men in her life are alive and yet they took up so much of the book. whatever you keep dead people alive in your memory but other than being reminded how selfish and uncaring Lila was there wasn't much about this i felt positive about. wouldn't recommend, went straight in my donation pile.

Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay by Elena Ferrante

i finally did it. what a rollercoaster! i absolutely hate reading first person books when i find the character annoying. not to say a bad person, or morally defunct or anything. just plain old annoying. Elena Greco is annoying. fine in the first 2 as she's 10-22 years old and it's expected, but the third book sees her in her mid 20s early 30s and i genuinely wanted to throw this book at a wall. i struggle to see this as a tale of friendship at this point just because like. they aren't friends??? they're two women who at this point are bound by history and maybe that's the point but i want better for Lila and she remains the star of the show

The Story of the Lost Child by Elena Ferrante

i finished the quartet and feel emotionally wrung out. this was going fine but i think it's around 350 pages in there's a full blown "relationship" between Lila's 24 year old son and Elena's 15 year old daughter???? reading from the perspective of an awful mother was so jarring, too. really enjoyed the series, i just feel like i felt very untethered towards the end and i just wanted it to end

september / autumnal reads

i'm annoyed that i've ended up in such a white reading space so will be fixing that for sure. also need a romance, i haven't read one i've liked this year! something fun is overdue. i have some horror books picked out but that's not for a little while yet. i don't see myself picking up anything new (maybe?) so i'll just be picking from what i already bought, trying some contemporary reads that have been rotting on my shelf for the past year

[finniestoncrane]

Hi again Finnie! Number 9 this time you beautiful angel! (Also feel free to choose any rouge, I know there might be a bias but go crazy, go sicko mode!)

Okay sooooo….

I am 22 years old! I have shoulder length blonde hair and pink glasses! I’m plus sized but also very animated! I have green blue eyes! I’m about 5ft and 7 inches tall! (What’s that in metric idk whatever, freedom units bestie!)

I love baking! It’s probably one of my main live languages outside of gifts and quality time! If you get me in your corner I am a ride or die person who’s very very loyal. I’ll stand up for you and always be on your side no matter what! With those vibes im also very sweet! I like to make sure my loved ones are doing okay and try and help them if I can.

You know I love puns and talking! I talk too much and that sometimes annoys people, but im really bubbly and able to bounce around from person to person and talk about anything! I love the color purple, I kinda like to wear sparkly makeup and just glitter period. I think I can be very tender and soft so maybe a rouge who would like to be coddled in a way?

Currently in college for history but I want to go into art history! I hope you can fill in the blanks my darling and I didn’t talk too much

🎀 No.9: Ever Fallen In Love With Someone 🎀

tell me a little bit about yourself and i'll give you a rogue pairing a/n: ok you gave me permission to go unexpected!! sav, i knew exactly who to give you. someone who would appreciate how sweet and wonderful you are and who would cherish everything you have to offer 1k milestone info! 🔞minors dni🔞 • kofi • tag: finnie1k

ok so someone who would appreciate a beautiful, soft bodied angel who is also tall? jervis tetch, at your service

first of all, the baking? a perfect addition to any tea party. it would be completely delightful for you two to host together, and share your joys with each other, or friends

it would make him feel complete, to have someone who brought something to the table (pun intended) equal to what he wants to bring

which i also think would work for him too. you're such a giving person, above and beyond, and jervis is also quite a strong giver and lover, so you're both equal on that aspect, no one is feeling like they're doing more of their share of the adoration between the two of you

he needs someone who is loyal to him, someone who can stick up for him and advocate for him, someone to calm him down and bring him back to reality and sanity when he loses himself a little bit, but who is equally willing to indulge in those creative fantasies and the sense of childlike wonder

jervis talks constantly. he likes reading out loud and reciting poetry and rhymes and jabbering away, so he'd love someone who could match his energy, or just someone to listen to him, or let him listen to them

physical affection is a must for him, although any kind of affection would work. he deeply wants a friend more than most things, and a soft, kind, friendly soul like you would be everything he wanted and needed and more

constantly holding your hand would be how he would soothe himself and i have no doubt you'd be up for offering him that level of comfort

and sparkles and glitter and purple all seem so whimsical, like you're a walking wonderland, joyous and bright and so much better than the real world around you. he could lose himself in you for days

[rollercoasterwords]

hi rae!! i was wondering if you could tell us more about your writing process :)) im very curious about it. like, do you brainstorm then write or write whatever flows or both. do you painstakingly line edit after or just give it a glance for any mistakes. im mostly curious about atydsp bc its so exceptionally well written and it absolutely boggles my mind that you were posting a ch a day. how much of your time for atydsp involved editing/scrapping & rewriting/etc? xx

hi sure i'd be happy to!! gonna put this under a cut tho bc it got long lol

for atydsp (+ my captive prince rewrite) my process was pretty different from my other writing in that i basically descended into a feverish haze of obsession and literally abandoned all other hobbies just to write bc i loved the story so much lol. for atydsp especially that thing was like...my only hobby for half a year like i was not reading or watching tv or movies or playing video games etc bc the only thing i wanted 2 do in my free time was. write.

when i'm rewriting a story from another character's pov i usually have the ch of whatever i'm rewriting open next to word doc and just kinda go 2 town. i think it's much easier when you aren't having to do the heavy lifting when it comes to plot and are following an outline, bc obviously you aren't having to do much story planning urself--although for the later chs of atydsp where i sort of broke off from the og version + the chs where r + s are separated + i had to write new scenes for s i did have to spend more time planning, writing, editing, etc, but i didn't start posting the story until i'd already written the first 20 chs so. i had a pretty large buffer and that combined with the obsession combined with the shorter chapters + outline to follow is why i was able to post so frequently.

when i'm writing a new fic there's much more brainstorming involved bc obviously i am having 2 come up w a whole new plot!! but bc i'm only writing fic for fun i don't really take it too seriously and usually i just cobble together a couple of fun scenes or tropes that i like and then sort of...fill in the blanks? like if i'm like "ok i want to write a scene where x happens and then later a scene where y happens" i usually end up figuring out a plot/how to keep the story moving between those two scenes, rather than vice versa (having like...a coherent plot and then coming up with fun scenes that fit into it). like my current wip started as just a single idea of "ooh what if there was a werewolf fighting ring" and then it become a voldemort-won au bc i was like hmmm in what situation would r + s meet at a werewolf fighting ring...and then i decided it would eventually turn into a horcrux hunt bc i was like "ok if r + s grew up in a voldemort-won au...what would james be doing...." and now the story is continuing to change as i continue to have ideas of like "ooh what if i incorporated this trope" or "ooh this would be such a fun scene to write." like lily + james's entire dynamic in this fic basically grew out of an idea that i had for a single argument that i wanted to write lmao

anyway when it comes to actual writing process i usually go into a ch with just a vague outline of a few bullet points, and if i'm stuck on something i send a voicenote to my sister just like...talking through my thoughts + what i want to happen + usually by the end of the voicenote i'll have figured out what direction i wanna take things. or sometimes i'll ask her opinion (the ending i'm planning rn for atwmd changed completely after one such consultation...had an idea but then talked myself out of it but then my twin was like wait....i think that idea works better than what ur currently planning....and i was like damn maybe ur right....). so most of my planning + brainstorming is basically just me daydreaming + then talking 2 myself lmao.

when it comes to actual writing i'm pretty slow because i'm too much of a perfectionist and i need everything to sound right. immediately. like i have heard the advice so many times "just get something down on the page then go back and edit it later" but i am like. incapable of following it lol i will write a sentence and then read over it three times to decide if i like it before i move on. the plus side to this is that my chs usually need very little editing; i generally just read over them once or twice and make a few minor tweaks and i'm good to go!

anyway. i have had some similar inquiries abt my writing process etc in the past so i'll tag this ask w 'writing tips' bc i think that's what i've used b4; hopefully this satisfied ur curiosity!